stonedstargazer666 - Tumblr blog

stonedstargazer666 · 14 days ago

Text

three times you sexted copia, and one time copia sexted you

Pairing: Cardinal Copia x f!Reader (Curator!Reader)

Rating: EXPLICIT

Words: 2,391

Tags: sexting, nudes, masturbation, reader being a devious little shit, ghouls also being devious little shits

Summary: What it says on the tin.

a/n: i have nothing further to add other than i absolutely know in my heart copia is terrible at taking nudes

~~~

Cardinal Copia’s hand flies to the pocket of his cassock when his phone begins to vibrate loud enough that it sounds against the wood of the pew. Cardinal Leroux turns in front of him to give him an ugly side eye, his mouth downturned in disapproval.

“Eh, sorry,” Copia whispers with a sheepish smile, and he sees Secondo glaring at him from the pulpit where he’s delivering his sermon. Anyone who knows him knows not to text him at this hour - that he’s either participating in mass or observing it - and his stomach drops as his phone vibrates again. If it’s anyone though, it’s you and he begins to conjure the horrible scenarios that would cause you to text him at this hour. You were fine when he left that morning, gave him a swift kiss on the cheek before he hustled out the door, but what if something terrible happened between now and then? What if you had slipped and hurt yourself, or what if you had a heart attack, or a seizure, or…he can’t stand it anymore and fishes his phone out of his pocket. When he opens his texts he chokes on his own spit.

Well…you’re not hurt, that’s for sure.

The first photo is you, reclined on his bed wearing nothing but one of his red birettas. You’ve got a sinful little pout on your face, teeth tugging on your bottom lip and he knows he’s mouth breathing as he attempts to shield his screen from any potential onlookers. He’s not prepared when he swipes to the next picture - an angled shot of you with your head tilted back, eyes closed in pleasure as your other hand is three fingers deep inside your–

“On that note, I believe Cardinal Copia would like to lend his voice to today’s sermon.”

His head jerks up at the sound of his name and he looks around panicked, fumbling with his phone in an attempt to shove it back in his pocket. All heads are turned to look at him - including Terzo, who looks wildly entertained - as he gapes like a goldfish.

“Eh…no…no thank you Papa.”

“I insist, Cardinal.”

Secondo looks positively venomous as he stares Copia down. Someone loudly cough-speaks the word “idiota” and Copia’s head swivels to Terzo, who looks like the picture of innocence. He can give a sermon drunk and with his eyes closed but his hands are currently folded in his lap hiding the…delicate state your photos have put him in. Leroux turns around again and gives him an evil little smile, the smug bastard. For a moment Copia actually entertains refusing to get up but he knows such stubbornness will only get him in further trouble. He sighs deeply and rises to his feet, cheeks beet red, as he sidles out of the pew and down the nave. He’s got his hands not-so-discreetly shielding the tent in his cassock and as he approaches the pulpit, someone lets out a loud wolf whistle. Secondo glowers down at him for a moment before giving him a slow, deliberate wink and a smirk.

Piccola volpe, he thinks as he looks out on the congregation, when I get my hands on you.

This meeting sucks.

That’s the only thought running through Copia’s head as he slumps in the uncomfortable wooden chair sitting at the end of the conference table. Meetings with the other cardinals and Terzo always consisted of at least one person getting offended by something lewd Terzo says (what is this, the Vatican?) and then Terzo changing the subject to something entirely off-topic. Right now he’s spouting off about how the Ministry needs to put in a pool with a swim up bar.

Copia wishes you were here.

You made even the most boring staff meetings tolerable, sitting next to him and giving him sideways smiles or texting him under the table. He wonders what you’re doing right now. Grabbing his phone off the table, he tucks it below the surface and taps out a text.

Amore this meeting blows. Save me.

A couple minutes pass and his phone lights up.

Poor thing. Give me a sec.

He has a vision of you kicking the conference room door in and dramatically rescuing him from this ridiculous fate and it makes the corners of his mouth twitch. He’s about to send you this exact thought when his phone lights up.

This better?

He almost drops his phone as he beholds a photo of you sitting at your desk, top yanked down to expose your breasts.

Amore! Warn me next time!

A moment and then a video pops up. He makes sure the volume is turned all the way down and hits play, sucking in a breath. You’re blinking sweetly at the camera, lips turned up in a teasing smirk, as you massage your breast with your free hand. When your fingers deliver a sharp pinch to your hardened nipple, he sees rather than hears your mouth open in a gasp. A text follows.

If you don’t like my pictures I can always find someone else to send them to.

The leather of his glove squeaks as he clenches his fist. Terzo and Cardinal Bergoglio have now entered into a shouting match that the other cardinals are trying desperately to intervene upon.

You can’t send me this and expect me not to do anything about it.

Oh yeah? Gonna slip away and take care of yourself? Or are you gonna come take care of me, Your Eminence?

Cazzo, you know exactly how to push his buttons and he loves every second of it. He’s jolted out of his lustful haze by Cardinals Leroux and Xavier jumping out of their seats to hold Bergoglio back while Terzo laughs in his face.

They won’t notice him missing.

Slowly he rises from his seat and backs out the door.

He’s thankful your office is not too far away.

___

It’s been 34 days.

Thirty-four long, arduous days since he’s seen your face, felt your presence. Thirty-four days since he’s smelled your perfume, your hair, your…well. He sags into the tour bus couch as the vehicle speeds down a dull highway in the middle of nowhere. The North American tour was almost over and he’s thankful it’s been such a success but cazzo, he misses you terribly. He opens up his texts and sighs as he types one out.

Miss you, amore mio.

He has to smile at the speed with which you text him back.

Miss you more, bello. What are you up to, where are you?

Copia looks up. Aether, Mountain, and Cirrus are sitting at the table playing Yahtzee while Dewdrop naps in one of the swivel chairs. Cumulus is folded up on the couch on his left, crocheting something while Swiss sits on his right, fucking around on his phone. He winces when he realizes that Rain is probably in the bathroom emptying his stomach again - the road did not agree with the poor water ghoul.

“Eh, where are we performing tonight?” he asks the room. Without even looking up, they answer.

“Little Rock.”

“Grazie.”

On the road to Little Rock. Not doing anything, just sitting here being miserable and wishing you were here. What are you doing?

I’ll be totally honest with you, I was just about to uhhhh take care of myself if you get my drift. You’re not the only one wishing I was there.

Oh. Now this is an intriguing turn of events. He shifts in his seat and he tucks his phone closer to him.

Show me

A few minutes pass and he wonders if he’s offended you in some way when his phone lights up again. The image presented to him is an angled shot of you in his bed, wearing the Ghost shirt he got you. On your legs are black thigh-high stockings and in your hand…oh ho ho. He knew it was genius to get you that little parting gift before he left for tour.

Gonna fit all that inside you, diavoletta mia?

It’s a poor substitute for you but I’ll do my best

Copia’s eyes dart up and around the cabin. Everyone is still doing their own thing, oblivious to what is occurring on his phone. He begins anxiously jiggling his leg, fingers playing out a rhythm on his thigh as he waits for your next update.

I’m soaked, baby. Just from the thought of you. Thinking about your tongue and how your nose bumps my clit just right.

His mouth goes dry and his sweatpants tighten.

Lemme see

The next picture is a close up of your fingers, your slick glistening on them in the low light followed immediately by a picture of you sliding them against your tongue. When he lets out a slight whine, Cirrus looks up at him with a cocked eyebrow. He shifts in his seat again, clearing his throat.

Bellezza mia, my filthy girl. I miss your taste. Remember when I told you I wanted to tie you to my tour bus bed? Wish I had made good on that

Mmm me too. Keeping me spread open and ready for you to use. The Cardinal’s little fuck toy. Is your cock hard? Thinking about bending me over while your ghouls listen in the other room? Are they there now?

He takes several deep breaths and jumps when Dew lets out a loud snore.

They are. Show me how well you take my little gift, sì?

Slowly, Copia shifts to grab the pillow next to him and cover his hardened cock. Cumulus gives him a small side eye but says nothing. When his phone vibrates again he almost drops it. The picture you have sent him is of you on your knees, thighs spread and shirt lifted up to bare your cunt and the thick dildo buried inside it to the hilt. He stares at it so long his eyes go blurry and doesn’t even realizes he’s rutting against the pillow until–

“Unholy fuck.”

This time he really does drop his phone as Swiss and Cumulus loom over him with open mouths.

“Wait let me see it again–” Swiss starts, moving to grab the phone.

“See what, what are we seeing?” Dew grumbles, yawning loudly.

“The Cardinal’s mate,” Cumulus begins with an eager grin, “She had a dil–”

“That’s enough!” Copia squawks, holding the pillow firm against his crotch while also attempting to slap away Swiss’ hand.

“Aether, hold him down so I can get it you have got to see this–”

“That is private, you little fucker!” Copia shouts, even as Mountain gets up and promptly sits on him.

“She said she wanted the ghouls to watch–”

“No, she said she wanted the ghouls to listen–wait how much did you see?”

Swiss grins, triumphantly securing Copia’s phone in between his fingers.

“I’ll tell her,” Copia growls, “She will not be pleased.”

“She’s a little freak,” Dew says with a filthy smile, standing up to stretch, “she’ll love it.”

Cirrus and Cumulus look at each other and shrug, making noises of agreement.

“Ghoul, get off of me. Swiss if you don’t–”

“Relax, boss,” he says, slapping his phone back into his hand. “Don’t worry, I saw enough to give me some inspiration later. I’ll give the others a thorough breakdown.”

Copia lets out a strangled howl as Rain stumbles into the room. Everyone falls quiet as the slender ghoul looks around bleary eyed.

“Wait, what did I miss?”

___

You’re thinking about your bed.

Your nice, soft, warm bed with your beloved tucked in it which is exactly where you should be right now instead of being glowered at from across a table by Papa Nihil. You should be in Copia’s arms, your nose buried in his neck smelling the remnants of his cologne. You should be carding your fingers through his chest hair as he murmurs sweetness at you in Italian. You should–

Well, speak of the Devil.

You surreptitiously look down at your phone as Sister Imperator talks about a fundraiser, smiling at what you see.

I am sorry I abandoned you, amore.

He told you this morning he wasn’t feeling well and you knew it must be serious for him to call out. If only you had the wisdom to do the same but both of you missing from the staff meeting would immediately be suspicious. And Imperator had just started tolerating you again after the incident in her office with Copia so you didn’t want to piss her off.

It’s okay, beloved. How are you feeling? Need me to bring you anything when I get out?

A pause.

I have a confession to make

Your lips tilt downwards in a frown as one of the bishops - Walsingham, you think? - starts to speak.

…what?

I’m not sick

You purse your lips and have to force yourself not to stomp your foot childishly.

You little fucker! You made me come do this bullshit on my own and for what!

For this–

A minute passes and then an image pops up on your screen. You’re not entirely sure what you’re looking at. It’s blurry and poorly lit and you think it might be–

Did you get a hairless rat?

You’re still squinting at the screen when his response pops up.

Amore! That’s my dick!

Huh. Yeah you can kind of see it - the familiar thick vein running down the length, the swollen head, the brown and silver curls at the base. You smile fondly.

Is this your first nude? Because I have some pointers

AMORE MIO I SHOWED YOU MY DICK AND THAT IS WHAT YOU SAY

Whoa. You have to raise your hand to your mouth to cover the smile stretching your face.

My apologies, beloved, your dick looks very nice. When I get out of this god awful meeting I’m coming back and showing you how it’s done. Then you’re free to send me all the lewd photos at inopportune moments as you want, okay?

A beat passes and briefly you wonder if you hurt his feelings before your screen lights up again.

Va bene, padrona. Will you be back in time to take care of my…situation or should I take care of myself?

You look at your watch.

Keep it hot for me. I deserve a treat after this meeting.

187 notes · View notes