#of course this doesn’t account for allergies

[some-siren]

Learning to differentiate between what I don’t like and what my body refuses to eat has been critical to my survival tbh

Like for example: I don’t like bananas much, but I can still eat them no problem if I need to or there’s nothing else to eat. It’s not what I like per se but it’s still an option

On the other hand, most of the things that have to do with like, onions in too big a quantity, or whatever this is, my body wants to throw up when I try to eat it. It tastes horrible and the texture is just wrong and I have to make the biggest effort possible to eat one bite. (Of course no shame to people who like these dishes, just talking about my personal experience)

And like. Until a couple years ago I had not realised there actively was a difference. I’d be visiting someone and what they served would just cause this visceral reaction and (when I was a child) cause my mother to say "you have to eat at least a bit more, like half" and sometimes I couldn’t even do that and she would be upset because her child was uncivilised. (When I tried to explain to her I simply couldn’t eat it she understood though, but still).

But then there was also just me not liking things such as fish or pizza (long story) or potatoes cooked with their skin on or the spinach from the cafeteria, or bananas. But the thing is, if I need to eat these, I can. There’s no problem other than it doesn’t being me joy and frankly I’d rather eat pasta or eggs or raw carrots instead but that’s it. Several times I’ve had meals at the school cafeteria that were just fish and spinach and a banana for desert. And I just ate those without thinking twice about it

All of that to say I’m never eating vegetarian Zwiebelkuchen ever again, sorry south Germany

[i-love-ptv]

Melting 🍹࿐ ࿔.˚

Pairing: Kiara Carrera x Fem!Smoothie/Juice Bar Owner!Reader

Who knew a smoothie could bring a summer of love, Kiara surely didn’t.

Wc: 4,521

Angst if you squint? (Not sure), Fluff, Like 2 sexual innuendos.

An: PHEWW GIRLL….this is a long one. actually the longest fic I’ve ever written. Sorry if Kie is a lil ooc, i tried to do her justice 🌚.

Also!! Reader’s ethnicity n stuff isn’t mentioned, but I imagined reader as a woc (personally!!) it’s totally okay if you’re not, you’re still very much welcome :)

Feedback always appreciated!! xx

Another “are we there yettttt?” is dragged out from JJ.

“JJ, you asked me that five minutes ago, and if you ask again I swear I’m gonna punch you.” Kiara huffs out with a glare to the blonde.

John B purses his lips, “where are we going again Kie?”

“We’re going to this juice and smoothie bar my mom told me about, she basically begged me to go.”

Sarah’s walking with a pep in her step. “Am I the only one that’s actually kind-of excited to go?” She practically squealed.

“Considering that there’s a smoothie truck at nearly every corner in the Obx, yes.” Pope sighed, wanting to just sit down since it was so hot outside.

Cleo wipes the slight sweat off her forehead, “Next time, let’s bring the Twinkie, i’d rather have the shitty air conditioning than none.”

John B’s head snaps to her, looking like he’s about to say something before Kiara’s shout rips through the humid air.

“Right here! This is it!” She exclaims with an airy chuckle.

The group of pogues look at the tiki-style bar, surrounded by tables, some being occupied by other teens and families.

The banner on the shack read ‘Shelly’s Smoothies & Juice’.

“How cliche.” JJ muttered, earning a sharp elbow to the ribs by Sarah.

“Oh shut up JJ! I think it’s cute!” Sarah steps back a bit and takes a picture, Kiara throws her an amused glance.

The pogues get closer to the shack, getting a slight glimpse of all of the equipment in it, and John B rings the bell.

“Uh hello?! Thirsty, sweaty customers here!” JJ yells.

The group all groan and growl at JJ for his outburst, they’re all so distracted that they don’t see you approach the counter from the inside.

“Oh! I’m so sorry for the wait! I had to chase away a squirrel just now!” You yelp out sheepishly, feeling silly for being slightly out of breath, and for not keeping that embarrassing fact to yourself.

The group of six turns to you, their argument dying down immediately.

Sarah steps forward first, locking eyes with you.

“Ooh! Can I get a….Passionfruit smoothie please?”

You smile, taking in account her huge, beaming smile.

“Of course,” you replied, “and what about y’all?”

They each take turns telling you their orders, but Kiara doesn’t seem to care.

She can’t help but stare at you.

The way your lips move whilst you speak, the way your hair is slightly frizzy from the North Carolina heat, the way that your tan lines are peaking out from your shirt. Your lips are slightly glossy, is it crazy that she wants to know what it’s from, but she’s not interested in looking at the gloss itself?

“You okay, Curly Girl?” Your question breaks her out of her thoughts. Now she notices everyone looking at her.

Pope coughs and nudges her.

“Oh..! Right! Sorry, uhm, I’m not quite sure what I want…” She murmurs softly. God what is up with her today?

You gasp with a smile, “It’s totally okay babe! Do ya got any allergies? ‘Cos I’d love to make you a smoothie I think you’d like!”

The brown haired girl whispers out a “no I don’t have any” and you immediately get to work after collecting the money from everyone.

While JJ is resting against the counter talking to you, the rest of the pogues look at Kiara suspiciously.

“Uhm okay..So what was that?” John B asks, while Cleo looks with a smirk.

“You think she’s pretty, don’t you girl?” This makes Kiara sputter.

“What? Well, yeah she’s pretty, like obviously. But like, not in that way!”

Cleo’s smirk turns into a cocky grin, “I didn't say it was in that way.”

Kiara looks at the others for support with wide eyes, but they all just shrug at her, and Sarah slightly grins at her.

She then tunes into the conversation JJ is having with you.

“I’ve never seen you around here before, you new here?”

You let out a loud ‘huh?’ over the noise of the blender.

“I said-“ JJ tries again, which is when you finally turn the blender off.

JJ lets out a charming laugh, “I asked if you were new here. I’ve never seen you around before, and trust me, I would’ve noticed a pretty girl like you.”

“Ugh, JJ, tone it down.” Pope complained.

You giggle at him, showing off your slightly puffy cheeks.

“Nah, I moved here for the summer, ‘till late August with my Aunt Sally, this is her bar! We just finished it up last week.”

You start handing out the smoothies and juices to the others, making sure not to spill any of the sweet drinks.

They sit down at the only other unoccupied table when they see a slightly older woman, pulling up in a navy blue pickup truck.

You jog over to their table and sit yourself down.

“There’s my aunt now! Since she’s here, I can finally take my break” You drag out playfully, you continue, “Oh I totally forgot to ask, is it okay if I sit here? I don’t wanna interrupt anything, but I’d love to get to know y’all!”

They all replied happily, and you made yourself snug between Cleo and Kiara.

The group sip excitedly at their drinks, letting our groans of satisfaction at the taste.

Pope pipes up first, “Wait, so if your aunt’s name is Sally, why’s this place called Shelly’s?”

“It’s a nickname we have for her! ‘Cos y’know that one tongue twister, ‘Sally sells seashells by the seashore’, and now that I say it out loud it sounds…kinda silly..” You finish meekly.

“That’s actually kind-of cute.” Kiara whispers under her breath.

“What was that Curly?” You ask her while looking at her with a glint in your eyes.

Kiara clears her throat, “Nothing! I was just saying how good this smoothie is, mind telling me what it is?”

You beam at this, “Well I can’t tell you, silly! It’s a secret!”

The pogues continue to look at the two of you, some with quirked brows, while the rest look slyly.

“Wait! Before we go any further, I need to know everyone’s names! Mine’s ___, but you can call me Cherry.”

They all introduce themselves, JJ boasts, while Kiara tries to find her footing, but only lets out a timid “Kiara, but everyone calls me Kie”.

You look at her, like you want to say something to her, but Sarah shouts abruptly, “Oh my god, this shirt is so cute! We definitely have to go shopping one day!”

You both laugh and talk excitedly, both talking over one another, but not seeming to care. Cleo eventually joins in too.

Kiara wishes she could, in fact, she doesn’t understand why she can’t. She’s never normally been like this.

With the pogues, she’s normally confident, and sarcastic, sometimes a little cocky too.

But for some reason, she can barely give out a sentence without squealing like a mouse. It makes her sick.

She thought she was bad when she was with JJ, but they didn’t last very long last summer.

But with him, she was still normal, she never acted like this.

She’d be lying if she said she hasn’t done her fair share of questioning her sexuality throughout life, but she’d never tell anyone that.

She honestly just feels pathetic, she just met this girl today.

She doesn’t know what spell this witch has on her, but god, she wants to get to know her.

{what is this spell baby? please show some mercy.}

Kiara’s spent an entire month trying to navigate these newfound feelings. It’s July now, meaning you leave next month.

To make matters worse, everyday she learns something new about Cherry, the timid, but confident girl that makes her a smoothie every single day; speaking of which..

“Hey Curly Girl! The usual?”

“Of course!” Kiara chuckled.

You notice that the group of pogues aren’t with her, you’re not that surprised though, she’s been coming by lately without them.

A part of you is glad that she visits alone, it gives you a chance to get to know her more without the constant teasing from the others.

You can’t help but crave to know every detail about her: what hair products she uses to make herself smell so heavenly, what her bedroom looks like, what her bed feels like…

An enraged shout makes you blink and look around wildly, “If I have to wait another fucking minute for a drink, I’m gonna start breaking every appliance in there!”

You gasp sharply, looking at the tall, burly man that’s spitting his words at you, both physically and figuratively.

“Uhm..Your juice is almost done sir! Just a minute…” You croak, letting out a breathy chuckle, trying to ease the tension in the air.

You have the burning urge to chew this man out for thinking he could come to your business and disrespect you, but Kie beats you to it.

She angrily walks up to him, “Dude, fucking lay off!”

He looks at her in disbelief, his eyes bulging and his nose flaring. You could faintly see a vein start to push against the skin from how he was almost screeching.

“Get the fuck outta’ the way, you runt.” The man starts to grit his teeth.

‘All this over a fucking juice? Jesus Christ.’ You think to yourself.

Kie steps forward, now almost chest to chest with the man as she looks up at him.

She speaks lowly, “The Cameron’s are real good friends of mine, and I can easily have you ran off this fucking island you prick.”

The stranger continues to hold eye contact with the brunette, their eyes boring into the other.

He scoffs, and begins to back up, “Whatever bitch.” He snarls, grabbing his money that you put out on the counter.

Kiara continues her glaring while you finish using the blender. You giggle and look at her amused, “Woah guys, watch out…I think she’s friends with the Cameron’s.”

She snaps her head at this, “Oh shut up loser. He was such a dick, it’s insane.”

“Yeah, he literally had just got here before you did, don’t know what the fuck his problem was.”

“Welllll, you might as well drink it, don’t want the juice to go to waste and all that.” She smirks.

You chuckle, “Wow, thanks for the free drink at my own bar. Here, Curly.”

You hand her the smoothie, and you notice how she accidentally put her fingers on yours, at least that’s what she believes you think. She’s not exactly the sneakiest.

She sips on it and moans in delight, is it crazy how you wish you could hear more of those?

“Will you ever tell me what’s in here? I mean, it’s been this huge mystery for an entire month now. For all I know, you could be poisoning me.”

“Yeah Kie, I’m definitely poisoning you slowly every day with smoothies.”

You continue, “It’s fun, having you guess the flavors and stuff. You’re so determined.”

Kiara groans at this, maybe your wish is coming true today.

“C’mon, just give me a hint.” She drags out.

“Maybe one day Curly Girl.”

August.

Normally, Kiara Carrera loved August.

She enjoys summer, but the feeling of the slight chill in the air, especially at night, as the weather begins to change for the new season, provides her a sense of comfort and nostalgia.

But now, all she can feel is dread.

You’re leaving soon. In two days, to be exact.

You’re going to be leaving her soon, and she hasn’t even told you how she feels.

That’s the thing…She doesn’t know how she feels.

Everything is so different with you, but she can’t describe it, and it’s killing her.

She wants to talk to someone about it, she honestly wants to talk to you, since you understand how she feels.

She only knows this because the night before when JJ had one too many beers at the Chateau, he had blabbered out that he wanted to get to know you, more romantically, that is.

At first, you looked at him like he had grown another head. Then you explained softly, “Oh JJ, I’m flattered sweetheart, really! But, I’m just..Not into guys like that.”

Kiara swore she felt her heartbeat in her ears, and she almost missed how quickly JJ sobered up after hearing that.

He looked like a kicked puppy who was left out in the rain, but Kie couldn’t bring herself to feel bad. In fact, she felt ecstatic at that moment, she couldn’t exactly pinpoint why. Well, she refused to, anyway.

Kiara would go to JJ, given he’s a ‘Chick-Magnet’ - his words - but that would be awkward. John B and (or) Pope would end up somehow blabbing to JJ.

She tried to talk to Cleo, but it didn’t go as successful as she thought it would. All she received was a ‘just go for it!’ As if it were that easy.

So she’s left with no choice.

If you woke up and told Sarah Cameron that she’d have Kiara on her doorstep asking for advice, she would’ve laughed in your face, three separate times.

Although they aren’t at each other's throats like before, Kiara was still a little standoff-ish towards Sarah.

So when Kiara was standing at the front door of Tanny-Hill, Sarah couldn’t help but stand there with wide eyes, mouth gaping like a fish out of water.

“I know, I know, I’m sorry, but I really need your help. I think you’ll be able to give me the best advice out of everyone…” Kiara looked down at her vans, bending her foot around on the steps as she twiddled with her rings.

“Uh..Yeah! Sure! C’mon in…” Sarah hesitated, slowly moving her body away from the door frame, allowing the brunette to enter.

Sarah walks her up to her room, not without asking Kiara if she wanted anything from the kitchen.

Kiara looks around Sarah’s room, feeling a little bit out of place since she’s the only one standing now.

Sarah looks at the girl, “You can, y’know, sit on the bed if you want.”

Kiara meekly walks over to the bed and sits down on the right of Sarah.

“I hate to sound harsh, but what exactly are you..Doing here?” Sarah asked, deciding to break the silence first.

“I need advice..”

The blonde quirks a brow at this,“Go on.”

“So, I think I like this person, but..I don’t know how to

go about it.”

“The Kiara Carrera is getting shy over a boy?” Sarah says out of shock, putting emphasis on her words.

“Ugh, that’s the thing, it’s not about a boy.” Kiara flops back on Sarah’s bed, finding comfort in the soft blanket resting beneath her head.

“It’s Cherry, isn’t it? You like her?” Sarah says trying to mask her happiness, but quickly failing due to the growing grin on her face.

There’s a beat of silence consuming the room.

“… Is it that obvious?”

“To everyone but you, yeah.” Sarah giggles.

Kiara smiles grimly, “Do you think she knows?”

Sarah looks at her with sympathy, “I think so, and even if she didn’t, that kiss didn’t look very friendly.”

The kiss.

While at the Chateau, the pogues decided to play truth or dare at the fire pit.

Cleo had dared you to kiss the person you found the most attractive, and with a bit of liquid courage in your system already, you kissed Kiara.

It wasn’t a quick peck by any means, in fact, it lasted for quite a few seconds, but Kiara wanted more.

Kiara had spent the rest of the night trying to gather her bearings, everytime she would look over to you, she’d see you looking right back at her. You would smirk and tilt your head at her.

“You still with me Kie?” Sarah asks gently, putting a hand on Kiara’s knee.

“Sorry, it’s just that like, everything’s so confusing! She flirts, I try to flirt back, but nothing ever happens! I just don’t get it!” Kiara is flailing her arms around, trying to get her point across, and her sentence trails off.

“Well, you’re just nervous. You really like her, and actually having a full-blown crush is wayyy different than just being a questioning and wondering middle schooler, Kie.”

Sarah’s dragging her finger along the curve of Kiara’s knee, trying to provide even an ounce of comfort for the girl.

After an hour-long talk between the two girls, and a tight hug, Kiara finally made up her mind and figured out what she wanted to do. She just hopes she’ll have enough time.

You get a text from Kiara, she asked you to meet her on the beach, the same beach where she taught you how to surf.

You look at the time on your phone, the 9:20 is practically blaring into your retinas.

You have to be at the dock at 7:45am, so you can get on the ferry.

The fact that your summer is over still hasn’t fully registered in your mind.

The pogues have planned a ‘goodbye’ party for you, and you’re endlessly grateful.

They've treated you with so much kindness, you felt like you were a part of the group.

You’ve made more friends than you thought you would, but you can’t help but wonder if you and Kiara [specifically] would become something more than friends.

Kiara.

Kiara.

Shit, you’re supposed to be meeting her at the beach.

You rush out of your aunt’s house, and ride your bike to the beach.

You were a little confused though, you thought that your party was going to be at the Chateau, that’s what Pope had told you.

After a bit of riding, you make it there, and you see her sitting by herself in the sand.

Kiara cycles her head around and when she spots you, she smiles.

“Howdy Curly Girl.”

Kie giggles softly at this, “Howdy.”

She pats the spot next to her, signaling you to sit down.

You lay your head on your shoulder, watching the waves glisten in the moonlight.

“So..” You drag out while drawing shapes in the sand.

She mimics you, “Soo…”

“Any…Particular reason for summoning me?”

“Uh,” There’s a beat of silence after she lets out a breathy chuckle.

She finally continues, “I kinda..Just wanted to talk to you, I suppose. Since you’re leaving in the morning ‘n stuff..”

“Yeah? You could’ve talked to me at the party babe, y’know I’ll always make time f’you.” You whisper, gazing at her, you find yourself getting lost in her deep brown eyes.

You analyze her face. She looks scared, you don’t think you’ve ever seen her so nervous.

“What’s going on Kie? Are you alright?” You ask, you’re beyond concerned at this point. She’s jittery, and fidgeting with everything in her eyesight, rather than looking back at you.

She takes a deep breath then exhales, “I was gonna tell you to turn around so I could tell you, but that’s just stupid as shit so…”

You look at her expectantly, silently urging her to continue.

“Cherry. I really like you.” She mutters.

“…..Like in a gay way?”

“Jesus Christ, yes in a gay way.”

Nothing comes out of either of your mouths.

“Took you long enough, huh Curly Girl?”

Kiara’s eyes widen, and her jaw almost drops to the sand. “Are you serious?”

You giggle, suddenly finding a rush of energy, “Yes! Oh my fucking god! I’ve been waiting for you to do something all summer. You had me thinking I was gonna go home without a girlfriend.”

Kie swears she feels her heart skip several beats, or maybe they’re doubling, she can’t even fucking tell at this point.

“Who said anything about you getting a girlfriend?” She teases.

You give her your best blank look, unable to keep it long since your body betrays you and you let out a cackle.

Kiara’s smiling ear to ear, laughing with you, when suddenly, you tackle her.

“Stop! My hair!” She yells through laughs.

After continuing fooling around, you both decide its best to head back to the Chateau.

You both get there together, side by side on your respective bikes.

You sneakily intertwine your pinkie with hers, locking it while walking through the Chateau, where you eventually see your friends.

You gasp, standing still with your mouth agape, “You guys!”

There's a banner with ‘See You Soon Cherry!’ on it, the writing isn’t very straight, it’s actually pretty damn slanted. There’s little drawing of different fruits, some smudging due to what you can only assume is paint that wasn’t dry at the moment.

There’s balloons everywhere, and your eyes eventually land on the cooler, knowing there’s a few beers in there for you.

That’s when suddenly, you hear two loud ‘pops’ and multiple colored confetti pieces cloud your vision.

You look to your left and see Sarah, you look over at Kiara and notice John B on her other side.

Your pinkies are still locked, and you’re not the only one that notices.

“Well would you look at that.” John B shouted, making the other pogues direct their eyes to you and Kiara’s hands.

Sarah jumps up and down, clinging to your shoulders, “Holy shit! Holy shit! Did it really happen?!”

You look dead at her, giving her a knowing look with a smirk.

JJ, Pope, and Cleo are rushing over while John B keeps Sarah from doing a cartwheel into a table.

JJ speaks up first, “Wait! When the fuck did this happen?!” He cried out, nearly howling. This makes both you and Kiara shrug.

There’s questions and exclamations flying everywhere, you don’t even know where to begin.

The night carries on, there’s music and lights everywhere above the hot tub.

You keep your drinking to a minimum, not wanting to be on the ferry for hours while hungover.

When you decide that it’s getting late, you declare that you’re going home.

The pogues protest, but eventually, you’re able to convince them to drive you, since your aunt’s house isn’t too far, but far enough to the point where you guys can’t walk.

Kiara walks you to the doorstep while the pogues stay in The Twinkie, they’re trying to pretend as if they aren’t eavesdropping.

“Y’know you still haven’t asked me.” Kiara bites her lip softly.

“Asked you what, Curly Girl?”

“To be your girlfriend, idiot.”

You hum at her antics, “Mm, you’re so needy, do y’know that?”

She slaps your arm playfully, yelling out a “I am not!”

You get down on one knee, being careful of the slightly rocky parts of the concrete, you hold her hands in yours, and Kiara whines.

“No you are not, you are literally unreal.”

You giggle at her, directing a ‘shush’ her way, making her roll her eyes.

“Will you, Kiara Carrera, make me the happiest girl alive, and be my girlfriend?”

Kiara puts her finger on her chin, pretending to think about it, you pinch the exposed skin of her stomach.

“Ah! Okay! Yes, yes I’ll be your girlfriend you loser!”

You get up and hug her tightly, wrapping your arms around her midsection.

She giggles into the crevice on your neck and holds you tightly.

You hear cheers and howls from the Twinkie, but you can’t take your eyes off Kiara.

You squeeze her waist one last time, and send her back to the van, not without her giving you a kiss on the cheek.

You go inside and see your aunt, smirking at you from the living room couch. You roll your eyes and begin to go to your room.

“You better tell me all about her!”

“I will!”

It’s 7:43 in the morning, you’re staring at your converses solemnly.

All of the pogues are in front of you, accompanied by your aunt.

“Are you sure you have everything, Cherry?”

You groan, “Yes, I’ve already told you a million times.” The girls snicker at you, especially Kiara.

“Not sure what you’re laughing at, Miss Thing.” You quirk a brow at your girlfriend. God, it felt so good to finally be able to call her your girlfriend.

She scrunches her face at you at first, but then her smirk drops into a deep frown. She steps forward into your embrace.

“You can totally jus’like…Stay. You don’t have to go home.”

You smile softly against her head, leaving a small peck behind. “I’m sorry my Curly Girl, but I have to

go home. I have to go to college and all that.”

John B pulls Kiara off of you, earning several shouts from the rest of the group.

“Oh shut up, I’m not gonna let Kie hog her before she’s gone for a year.”

He hugs you tightly, it makes your eyes water. He pulls back and notices your pout. “I’m gonna miss you guys so much..”

The pogues, alongside your aunt, gather around you, squeezing you tightly, whispering promises of ‘We’re gonna call and text all the time!’ and ‘We’re gonna miss you so much, it’s never gonna be the same without you’.

“Does anyone know what time it is?” You sniffle.

Kiara immediately whips out her phone, showing the time. It read 7:48.

“Okay so what if it’s not coming, does that mean you can stay forever?” JJ asks, reminding you of a child on Christmas morning.

You look over and see the ferry slowly coming towards the dock.

“It’s here JJ..”

“I know..” JJ pouts.

Cleo shouts abruptly, “Wait!”

She picks up the bag off the dock, nearly forgetting it.

“All of us put something of ours in it, so you can remember us!” She smiles warmly at you.

Your cheeks hurt from smiling, especially when Sarah swats your hand when you go to look inside the bag.

“You can’t look now, silly! You’re supposed to wait until you miss us.”

“Oh my god whateverrr.” You trailed off with a laugh.

The ferry officially stopped moving, signaling that it’s your time to go.

You look at the ship, and look back at Kiara.

You grab her face with both of your hands, stroking gently while she bats her eyelashes at you.

“You’re the reason why I had the best summer of my life. I love you Kiara.”

“I love you more ___.” Kiara croaks.

You grab her left hand, slipping off one of your rings, and putting it on her finger, you kiss it softly.

She pulls you into a passionate kiss, holding your head in place, like she’s not ready for you to go yet.

You pull back slightly, making sure you're leveled with her ear.

“Cherry and coconut.”

Kiara pushes your face back so she can look at you properly, “Huh..?”

You wait a second, watching intently as it slowly dawns on her.

You leave a kiss on her nose, and begin to walk towards the end of the dock.

Kiara faintly hears shouts of “We love you!”, her hearing’s fuzzy, and all she can focus on is you.

Cherry and coconut.

The recipe to the smoothie of love.

[ryuichirou]

how would the TWST boys react if they were chosen by the cat distribution system and a stray cat choose them to be its cat dad?

Today I decided that it’s time to write about something delightful lol I keep smiling every time I remember that we have this ask in our askbox… Thank you for waiting, Anon! I’m sorry it took this long.

Maaaybe I’ll write more hc posts next week… I try to write at least two per week, but there are so many good prompts that I should probably try to do more.

Anyways! Once again my bias is clear because I am a poor soul that loves cats but doesn’t own one, so spoiler alert: all the boys end up loving cats as well lol But I think it’s fair… How does one not like cats? Don’t ask Ciel.

Riddle – his first instinct is to refuse poor cat’s attempts to hang out because his mother never let him own a cat: they claw furniture, they bite, and Riddle has allergies! Or… he thought he did. He didn’t get any reaction from the cat, so maybe that was a lie?? Anyways, he would melt almost immediately because a fluffy creature wanting to be his friend is something that Riddle always wished for. He loves animals and taking care of them, so there is no way he is letting go of that cat! Of course he has to get used to it because a cat would never follow any rules, and sometimes it would get frustrating for Riddle, but… whenever a cat wants to play with him or cuddle with him, Riddle giggles like the happiest kid in the world. No one is allowed to pet his cat without his permission.

Ace – he will brag about it a lot. He’ll take the cat everywhere and always have it either on his lap or on his shoulders. He’ll always talk about just how much the cat purrs for him and him only, and how cool of a person he is because the cat clearly chose him specifically to be his owner. The cat really does like him a lot, but it doesn’t mean that Ace doesn’t get scratched or bitten all the time lol Also, at some point it will become the freshmen’s cat that everyone takes care of a little, and Ace would start to constantly remind everyone that this is in fact HIS cat!

Deuce – aw, he would probably be a little awkward at first. He strikes me as someone who is more of a dog person and doesn’t have much experience with cats… He would be very careful around it, as if he isn’t just afraid to hurt the cat, he doesn’t even want to offend it somehow. Of course he would swear that he’ll take care of the cat and be very responsible about it! But it will take a while for him to take it inside the dorm; he’ll just feed it and hang out with it outside at first… until the weather gets too cold.

Trey – he would have this “why me though?” vibe to his reaction, but he would still be kind of happy. Maybe he shouldn’t have fed it, now it follows him around everywhere… Trey says that this isn’t really his cat, but keeps taking care of it anyway. He never expected to be this delighted to have a cat. He would get much more into it than he expected, to be honest. He’ll probably feed it with home-made treats and give it toys that he made himself…

Cater – OF COURSE he’ll start taking selfies with this cat. OF COURSE. After some time he might even make a separate account for the cat, to see if it would surpass his follower count. Other than that, he would cuddle the cat a lot, talk to it, play with it, dress it up all cutely and meme-y. I think it would be very good for Cater to own a cat… He needs to learn how to take care of it properly though, so some assistance might be necessary lol

Leona – would he even care? Maybe a little bit, but he would act like he doesn’t care at all. He doesn’t even know who the fuck this cat is, it just appeared suddenly and now lives in his room. It can stay or leave, doesn’t make any difference to Leona. In actuality though, on some level he does appreciate the companionship of another cat sleeping next to him or on top of him and grooming his ears. But only when no one sees it or comments on it. He could chat with the cat btw, but he just doesn’t – for the most time they hang out in silence.

Ruggie – another cat to take care of?? And also, another mouth to feed?? Well that can’t be helped, it’s not like he is going to throw the poor thing away. I think he will manage to train it to do all kinds of tricks, like stealing stuff from others’ pockets or sneaking things away for Ruggie… the cat will be his partner in crime lol He would also probably have conversations with it, since it’s easier for him to talk to animals.

Jack – not only a dog-person, but also literally a dog, so he might have a hard time at first understanding that cat’s behavior. He is probably going to act like he isn’t interested at first, but jokes on him, because this only makes the cat more into him. He will literally sit all alone, radiating “don’t talk to me” aura, and the cat would think that this is exactly where it wants to sit – on Jack’s lap. Even though Jack is a tsundere, he is going to warm up eventually… and even while he is in his denial phase, he will take care of the cat by keeping it fed and letting it inside when it’s cold. Speaking of cold, Jack is very warm, so the cat loves him a lot…

Azul – “I don’t have time for this” at first, with all the reasons why having a cat is a bad idea popping up in his head at once. Similarly to Riddle’s mom’s mantra: it ruins furniture, it causes allergies, it sheds, it doesn’t behave… but he would also break very quickly, probably the moment the cat starts rubbing against his leg or purring at him. Azul would probably make quite a drastic 180 degree turn and enter his “a cartoon villain with a cat on his lap that he pets menacingly” phase by the end of his first day with the said cat. It feels good. It feels correct to pet a fluffy purring creature while you’re humiliating someone who is indebted to you. Also, of course he is going to treat the cat like royalty and get it all the best things… and also train it like a dog at the same time.

Floyd – people would think that he isn’t responsible enough to own a pet, but actually a cat would probably be the best pick for him. At first he would get all excited because this little buddy just suddenly decided to hang out with him. Floyd would just suddenly start appearing everywhere with a cat on his shoulder like he is a pirate or something. But then both the cat and Floyd would lose interest in each other, until they meet again and decide that they want to hang out again lol But while Floyd and cat are together, he takes it everywhere, plays with it a lot, races with it, cuddles it, smooches it, throws it in the air and catches it. Some of Floyd’s games aren’t the best for the cat, so Floyd ends up getting scratched and hissed at quite often, but for some reason the cat still adores him enough to let him do anything with it, even hold it upside-down.

Jade – it’s easy to picture him being a cat-lover because of the Sebastian parallels lol I think he would really enjoy owning a cat, and he would make it everyone else’s problem. Just like Floyd, he would walk around with a cat on his shoulders, but he would always mention it: please don’t mind my cat, he just loves me very much. I hope you are not bothered by my cat’s presence, he won’t bother us, I swear. Also, I think because Jade would actually try to properly take care of the cat, he would encounter some unpredictable issues, like a cat refusing to eat certain cat food or eating something it’s not supposed to eat. Jade would have a couple of moments that would make him fuss over it and even though he wouldn’t enjoy it… he likes the unpredictability. Keep chewing on random things, cat! But not too much, please.

Kalim – he would be so happy and excited!! It’s like making a friend, but a new kind of friend, a very fluffy one! Kalim is probably way too cuddly for the cat’s liking, so sometimes he would get confused by it running away from him. He just wants the cat to be happy… he would buy 5 cat towers, 30 toys and a bunch of cool accessories for the cat during the very first day of owning it (then he’ll buy more)! And 10 beds, so the cat could pick whichever it likes most (it sleeps in Kalim’s bed of course)!! And of course he will ask Jamil to learn how to cook delicious meals for the cat. He would try to feed the cat his own food first, but of course would stop once he learns that the cat shouldn’t eat spicy food…

Jamil – another one who would think that he doesn’t have time or energy to take care of another thing at first, but would warm up very quickly. He would tsundere up a bit when Kalim says that he is happy that Jamil has a little fluffy friend now, but after a while he will realise that Kalim is kind of right… a cat is even better than a friend. Hanging out with it doesn’t take as much energy, in fact, Jamil feels very energised after petting it and playing with it. Wow… a cat would do wonders to Jamil’s psyche…! He would both cuddle with it and let it sleep in his bed at night, and play a lot of active games with it whenever he has time for it.

Vil – despite how busy he always is, I think he would accept the cat immediately. The cat clearly chose him – it’s only fair that it’s Vil’s responsibility to take care of it now… I don’t think Vil has a lot of experience with cats, but he would read a lot of books and articles to make sure that the cat lives a good life in his dorm. He wouldn’t be as excessive as Kalim, but… he might have gotten carried away with the stuff that he got for the cat. But all of it is very necessary! The best cat food (he’ll ditch it after a while and start cooking for the cat himself), the best sleeping place, the best toys to make sure that the cat is active and healthy. He will also bathe it, brush its fur every day, trim its nails… Vil’s cat is going to be such a wonderfully groomed cat that knows all kinds of tricks and is very smart and well-behaved… but also Vil’s capricious baby that hates everyone other than him lol

Rook – oh, he wouldn’t consider himself an owner, he would always say that he is a companion to his cat lol He wouldn’t get surprised when the cat suddenly starts to follow him around, but he would act so flattered and honoured! Such a beautiful creature decided to illuminate his life with its presence. Rook is pretty good at talking to animals, so he would have conversations with his cat… While sitting in a tree together lol He would feed it of course, but he would also hunt with it and would prefer for it to catch its own prey. He also doesn’t want to trim its nails or groom it more than necessary, but alas, if it wants to live in Pomefiore with him, it has to follow Vil’s rules~ Rook wouldn’t want to anger the queen with an ill-behaved and dirty cat, right? Maybe he would prefer to keep the cat outside though, to keep it as undomesticated as possible. A weirdo…

Epel – he would be so happy! It’s been a while since he owned a pet, and this is the first time he has a cat. He would pet and cuddle it a lot, even if it’s still dirty… Of course, his first instinct would be to feed it and to bring it to his room. But he would also probably be anxious to bring it to the dorm: what if Vil sees it and takes it away… and even if Vil doesn’t see it, Rook is definitely going to notice the cat smell or something, and he will snitch on him! Anyways, he won’t be able to keep it a secret for a long time, but the cat will do some damage lol Surprisingly, Epel will only get scolded for not being a proper owner, so as long as he does better, the cat can stay. But it probably means that his senpai will start taking care of the cat as well. Epel will be a bit jealous, it’s his cat after all…

Idia – he’d die. He’d be so happy. A cat that doesn’t hate him? A cat that wants to hang out? A cat that FOLLOWS HIM TO HIS ROOM AND STAYS THERE? HIS CAT? Idia would feel like he spent all of his luck points that he had saved up for these 18 years. Or was it good karma? Anyways, Idia now spends all his time building cat towers and automatic feeders and toys and all kinds of gadgets for his cool new cat. At first he wouldn’t be as good at talking to a cat, and it would be very obvious that he is a bit worried when he pets it and doesn’t want to scare it away, but he’ll start cuddling with it pretty quickly. He’s so happy… It doesn’t feel real, it doesn’t feel real at all. Even when he gets used to the cat and stops being so awkward around it, he will still feel such huge wave of happiness every time he sees it, as if every time he sees it is the first time…

Ortho – this is the first time he has a fluffy friend, well, other than Grim of course! And Lucius isn’t very friendly with him either, so this is a pretty new experience! Of course, partially he would be excited because if he owns a cat, it’s Idia’s cat as well, and he knows how much Idia loves cats. But also, this is such a good opportunity to make a proper cat-to-human translator!.. It’s weird with Ortho. He has all the info he needs, and he is very good at some things, but somehow… petting and interacting with a cat is a bit difficult. Why doesn’t kitty want to eat this food? Why did it pee in the wrong place? What’s going on? I think he’ll end up asking Trein for advice a lot, and this will be a good experience for everyone involved. Also, his cat loves him more when his processor gets hot lol he is a walking heater.

Lilia – he would be happy at first and show off and brag because now he isn’t just cute, he’s double cute! With a cute cat on his head/shoulders! But at the same time, I don’t know if he is the best person to have a cat. I feel like he is one of those who try to feed it with milk, but also knowing Lilia, he literally makes those he cares for drink milk from a mug. Maybe he’d act differently with a cat, but it surely will be an adventure for this poor animal lol He plays with it similarly to how Floyd plays with his cat, and just like with Floyd, somehow it makes the cat very attached to him. Sometimes Lilia cuddles it and kisses it a lot, but a lot of times it’s the cat that gets clingy with Lilia and wants to sleep with its head on his shoulder. Acting like a baby, smh…

Silver – aw, he would be so good. Similarly to Rook, he would consider a cat to be a companion, but he would also try to be very responsible with his he takes care of it. He would take it to Diasomnia and let it sleep in his bed, wouldn’t do much grooming or brushing, but he would do his best in terms of playing with it and feeding it well, I think. Especially the latter lol But the majority of time the cat would just cuddle up and sleep with him whenever he’s dozing off.

Sebek – he has better things to do than to indulge in these games!! He says as he brings the cat home with a bunch of books with all the necessary information on how to take care of a cat!! Did he also fall victim of cute paws and purring? Maybe! But it won’t affect his performance as Malleus’ guard in a slightest! I think he will try to train the cat, and he might even succeed to some degree, but his cat won’t be as well-trained as Vil’s or Azul’s. Maybe the cat just doesn’t take him seriously and just wants to make biscuits on his stomach while sleeping on his lap… Sebek would seethe, but won’t move until the cat leaves :(

Malleus – the cat isn’t afraid of him? Oh he would be so delighted. He was very happy about the goat in the Glorious Masquerade event, and I think his reaction would be similar here: first amusement, a little surprise, but then he would get so tickled and excited for this new companionship. The cat would be allowed to seemingly disrespect Malleus by positioning itself on his horns, leaving fur on his garment, playing with his hair, and Malleus would laugh… until the cat scratches him. Then Malleus would start sulking. But he’ll get over it, he’s not a baby.

[superhero--imagines]

Bat Boys on Valentines Day

Dick Grayson

* Made reservations a month ago

* Cross-checked the regular menu and seasonal menu to make sure there were things you’d like and conformed to your dietary preferences

* Surprises you with flowers and a big ticket high-fashion item like a Luis Vuitton bag or a pair of shoes

* When he hands it over the shocked look on your face makes him smile.

* You shower him with kisses in a second.

* “I” *kiss* “love” *kiss* “you” *kiss* “so” *kiss* “much!”

* He laughs at the ticklish feeling and kisses you back when it’s over.

* “No, I love you so much.”

Jason Todd

* He hates crowds and decides to make you a nice pleasant meal at home.

* He decided the menu over a month ago, a full four course meal with curated cocktails, wine and ambiance.

* He ‘borrows’ some fine dining dishes from the manor and sets the table up with candles and a bouquet of flowers.

* “Do you like it?” He asks, nervous and afraid—he cooks for himself all the time but cooking for you makes him afraid beyond belief

* What if you don’t like it? What if you have a secret allergy? What if you never want to talk to him again because he didn’t take you out like a traditional date?

* “I love it! The risotto is so good and, are these truffles?”

* Afterwards he gives you some books he knows you want or that you would like and pressed flower bookmarks that he made himself.

* “Jason Todd, you are my entire heart.”

Tim Drake

* He forgets.

* “I thought Valentine’s Day was always on Thursday!” He shrieks, flipping through the phone book for any restaurant that’ll take you.

* “That’s Thanksgiving Tim.”

* But it’s okay—

* “Shit, you think dominos will still deliver today?” You shout from the other side of the room.

* —because you forgot too.

* You have pizza in bed while watching movies and cuddling.

* “This isn’t the worst right?” He asks.

* “Any day with quality time with you is a good day.” You mumble after a yawn, cuddling into his chest as he flushed bright pink.

Duke Thomas

* Classic Dinner and a Movie

* You guys haven’t been dating for long so he doesn’t want to scare you off with anything intense.

* You end up goofing around too long at the arcade connected to the movie theatre and missing your reservation slot.

* You end up getting soft pretzels and sitting by the lake.

* “Honestly, I think this is way better than eating at a French restaurant.”

* He laughs, “any time with you is a good one.”

Damian Waybe

* It’s a three person date — You, Damian, and Titus.

* You go for a walk around the lake, playing with Titus and jokingly splashing each other, and then a picnic on the grassy bluff above.

* “It’s pretty quiet today, huh?”

* “Everyone’s probably at the new french restaurant downtown.” He holds out a dipped strawberry for you which you bite into.

* “The one you can pronounce?”

* You laugh at his frown, pressing a kiss to his cheek, only to laugh again when Titus nudges you with his nose and places his head in your lap with a wagging tag.

* “Of course I didn’t forget you, kisses for Titus too!”

Bonus:

Bruce Wayne

* Wines and dines and sixty-nines you

* He’s probably got a standing reservation at the best restaurant in the city on account of the fact that he’s richer than god

* Gets a private room or balcony that overlooks the city so you have privacy but also the glitz and glam of a night out

* Already called ahead of time and got the chef to make your favorite dinner—just for you

* As a gift he gives you six orgasms in a row a cute little diamond accessory with his initial in gold.

[vanoilette]

𖦹 synopsis. main four w sick reader ! — how they act when your sick.

disclaimers. swearing, slightly suggestive, cartman being a jew hater

notes. i have really bad allergies at the moment so i came up with the idea for this one !!

eric cartman.

he kinda forgot you could get sick.

but you did, whether it was bad allergies, the flu, any kind of sickness at all.

hes Cartman, like i’ve said time and time before.

so he pretends like he doesn’t care, but your health is a priority to him.

“What do you mean you can’t come to watch Terrance and Phillip with me today? Why the hell not?”

“Eric, Im sick.”

“So what?”

genuinely gets disappointed and mad that you cant, and or wont come over.

pretty much is more agitated than he already is for the rest of the day towards everyone who speaks to him besides you, especially towards kahl.

“Shut up you stupid jew.”

If your sick for more than a day or two, he’ll just come over to your house because frankly—hes just a bit too dependent on your company.

But he’ll be so dramatic if you cough or sneeze around him.

“Oh my god ..i..i think i’m dying, your spreading your illness!”

You literally just sneezed next to him.

He acts like your both sick or something.

kenny mccormick.

kenny’s died, gotten sick, etc. multiple times before.

although, unlike him. You actually stayed home, being sick, resting. instead of being in the freezing cold snow like everyone else.

kenny does all of the above when hes sick instead of resting, no wonder.

“Wait .. why can’t you come outside?”

“Because, im sick, kenneth.”

“..But you can still walk.”

that aside, he does try his best to take care of you.

despite all the risks of doing it, he still lays down next to you, cuddles you, sleeps beside you.

and most definitely tries to kiss you.

And he just chills with you, maybe make you soup, soup at your house of course.

He doesn’t have alot of money to help you to be honest.

But he did steal something on the account of you were feeling 10x more horrible and he had to snatch some medicine for you.

Personally? Hes like butters when it comes to a relationship.

Both of the two act like golden retriever type of boyfriends, but thats just in my opinion.

kyle broflovski.

lord.

he acts like a mom.

He dropped everything as soon as you texted him and just came over to your house to take care of you immediately.

“Are you okay dude??”

“I just have allergies.”

“I bet thats what dead people thought too.”

“What the fuck kyle.”

Makes you food, kisses you, (on the cheek), and is just very present during the whole thing, hes like this even when your not sick anyways.

Pretty much is like Kenny, both want to be there for you.

He tries to make you feel better in any way he can.

Yes, any way, take that in whatever way you want.

So sweet though, and treats you so well the entire time.

You got better after a bit, thankfully.

stan marsh.

You had the unfortunate luck of getting sick while Stan and his family were out on a “family road trip.”

He felt so bad.

Called you the entire time just to make sure you were okay.

“Babe, im so sorry, i didn’t even wanna come anyways.”

he didn’t want to be there, though your voice and presence made the trip slightly more bearable.

Things got a little more .. intimate over the phone, but i’ll make a separate part on that later, or later.

Especially on the drive over, and back, was hell; to him atleast.

He had to get off the phone at some point because his parents said it was “family time”

And he did, respectfully and reluctantly.

In the end, as always. You got better.

[deuxcherise]

Collar Crimes: Don't be Crabby

C/w: Unhealthy behavior, OCs, yandere male, yandere female, hostage situation, threats, mentions death, mentions blood, describes seafood, describes eating sound, slight fluff (?), no comfort, a bit crack, reader insert, gender neutral reader, reader doesn’t have allergies in this story, includes a picture of seafood platter (you’ll see why~)

A/n: So I’m just popping in real quick to update this story for my dear readers. I’ve had to go days racking my head about how I was going to go about the dynamic between you and a certain someone who you’ll meet right when you wake after getting kidnapped. Trying out some worldbuilding  and dropping lore here and there.

Masterlist | Part 6, Part 7 (you’re here!), Part 8 (not yet!)

There are three things one should know about before venturing into the port city of Agobury, especially if one is planning to stick around:

Provide something of worth, whether that be a valuable item, an enticing business proposal, or a warm body…

If your business has anything to do with the ports or the waters surrounding Agobury, your business is with the Marcet Port.

If your business does not have anything to do with the Marcet Port, your business is everyone else’s business.

Of those people one must worry about within the city, there are three prominent families to watch out for.

The first one, who supposedly reigns over the half of the city, is the Aurem-Diavolus Family, also known by the infamous moniker, the May Devils. Whether or not it’s true how much they own, no one has the manpower or the wealth or even sheer audacity to suggest otherwise.

“'Ey, Sis! That Ermine kid!”

“What the- How did he get out?” Lyn yells into the intercom, “Don't let him escape!”

The second one to watch out for are the owners of all of the banks in Agobury. Every single one, regardless of name, is under the command of the Panthera Family. Only those who have been unfortunate enough to lose or stupidly gamble all of their money know them as the Blacklists. No bank account, no money. No money, no peace.

“Honey? Eris?” Ollie’s mother attempts to reason. “Do calm— Oh, heavens!”

“Oi, Eris! Calm down!” Ollie shouts. “You don't have to— Aw, shit.”

And the third family, the Ermines, whose name once sent shivers down even the sturdiest of spines throughout the city a decade ago, is now only known through faded whispers of tortured old witnesses. That being said, they are still very much alive and well, even in their meager numbers.

“Please, I have a—”

Crunch.

Rumors have that they have never felt the fear of death.

Eris drags the residue from the bottom of his blood-stained shoes across a clean part of the concrete floor. His eyes are feral, blown out to the point one could barely see the original green hue of his irises.

Click. Click click click click click.

Tiny red dots zoom in from outside towards the center of Eris’s head and heart from behind. A squad of armored soldiers bear their firearms, ready to pull the trigger at command. “Stand down, Ermine! Or we’ll be forced to engage.”

In response, Eris’s body is still, not even a twitch to be seen. His head slowly pivots on his neck as smoothly as a doll until his eyes meet the opaque visors of the tensed squad.

For a moment, everything stills. Everything quiets. The only sounds that can be heard are the beating of nervous hearts, shudders of shaky breaths, and the last gasps of fallen soldiers. Eris;s mouth slowly spreads into an unnervingly wide grin.

And then, he moves.

-----🔔-----

One has to wonder if there is such a thing as a god or some force in the universe that has a cruel hobby of bringing the most pitiful souls all into a single place where demons are allowed to roam freely, all doomed to die tragically young…

And yet, interestingly, there are people who survive long enough to produce the next generation of unlucky souls to replace the city’s ever diminishing numbers— before they die due to some accident or “accident”, of course. The forsaken, the “les misérables”, the normies, etc. People who could not escape Agobury, even if they had all of the money and right connections in the world.

Unless, they are willing to give up their souls.

Crack. Shlurp. Munch munch. Gulp.

But some aren’t even lucky enough for that.

“Like you!” the young man sitting across from you chirps, cracking open another king crab leg with just his fingers and slurping up the juicy white and red meat. “Sho tewl me— Gulp— how did someone like you manage to capture the heart of one of the most dangerous men in our city, hm~?” he asks, pointing the empty shell towards you.

You narrow your eyes in response.

This guy… looks familiar… But anyway, heck if I know!?

All you’ve been doing all of your life has been minding your own damn business. Did you ever ask for your puppy-like ex, Lyn, to fall in love with you to the point of suffocation? No. Did you ever ask for that stupid Eris to weasel his way into your life? No. Did you ever ask for that damn Ollie to break into your home and steal your family portrait? No. Did you ever ask to be kidnapped, knocked out, get woken up in some fancy restaurant in  who knows where, dressed up in some fancy attire that feels like heaven to be in but costs more than your monthly rent, and sat across some deranged criminal who suspiciously reminds you of that stupid Eris, currently enjoying a fresh plate of Alaskan king crabs like this is some normal date? HELL NO.

“Hey, less glaring, more talking,” he says, tossing the shell away in favor of debating over which of the colorful sashimi to eat first.

“Who are you, where are we, and what do you want from me?” you demand, slamming your hands on the table, wrapping your fingers around the fabric of the velvety white table cloth.

The stranger pops a piece of tuna sashimi into his mouth. “Tut tut tut, so many questions~ On second thought, you must be hungry. How about you just enjoy our dinner first, hm? Settle in… Then we’ll get back to my question. Sounds good?”

You take in your surroundings. A fancy restaurant with crystal chandeliers all over the ceilings, blacked out windows framed with pulled-back thick cream drapes, and what you assume to be mahogany wooden floors. Classical music plays in the background by professionals with shiny, wooden instruments. Servers are waiting against the wall, occasionally glancing your way since the only diners here seem to be you and this weirdo. You look down at your own dish, a matching plate of seafood ranging from crabs to mollusks to fishes that could never grace the plate of your local diner, sparkling like gems from the ocean.

Crack. Crack crack crack.

You look up from your plate towards the noise. You find him holding a decorative rock to crack open an ridiculously large clam— why is he using a rock instead of the clam knife?

He looks up and says, “Jeez. C’mon, just eat. Eat and then we’ll talk.”

“.....” You look warily over the food.

“... It’s not poisoned, ya know? I need you alive.”

So he says… Well, if that’s the case for whatever reason, then why not? If you want to escape, you’ll need the energy. If you end up dying anyway, then at least you’ll die eating delicious, expensive food. You nod and begin devouring your plate.

Crunch. Shlurp. Gulp.

The crab legs are immaculately succulent, tender, and slightly sweet with a buttery flavor. The clams taste savory with a clean, earthy undertone that evokes the essence of the sea. The shrimps offer firm yet tender bites, with a delicate hint of natural sweetness from the sea, balanced by a clean, slightly briny undertone. The oysters—

“Wow. Are you an idiot?”

You manage to choke down the oyster meat that was just halfway down your throat before the insult could shock you entirely. You cough several times, hitting your chest with the side of your fist. “What?”

“Are you an idiot?” he repeats, throwing you an arrogant smirk as he finishes a handful of clams. “You don’t even know who I am— Crunch—, and whether or not— Shlurp— I’m telling the truth about— Gulp— poisoning your food, ya know? Why would you believe someone who kidnapped you?”

You wipe your mouth with the thick napkin on your lap. “... You would poison a perfectly good plate of super expensive seafood?” you ask, annoyed.

He purses his lips. “... Good point… B-B-BUT!” He wags a finger. “What if I offered you this food in exchange for servitude, huh? You’ll be indebted to me for life, ya know! Didn’t you think about that?”

You think about it. Just for a moment. Then you realize that nothing would change from your situation anyway, working paycheck to paycheck, which makes you groan because thinking about something like that is a waste of time when your plate is still full of seafood to feed your stomach. How long have you been asleep anyway? It feels like it's been days and your stomach is a void that has been waiting to be filled.

You shrug and then continue feasting on your plate.

The stranger stares at you from across the table, flabbergasted at your nonchalance. He had ordered his men to kidnap you in broad daylight in front of your friends right in front of your workplace, knowing full well that Eris is locked up by the May Devils for the crimes he’s committed against them. Surely, someone of your mediocre lineage should be more… more aware of their predicament or something? Afraid, vulnerable, too scared to eat maybe? Anything! Unless you must be an idiot. Eris wouldn’t fall for some naive dummy like you, would he?

… Would he?

“... Hey…" He tries to get your attention.

Crunch. Shlurp. Gulp.

He attempts to get your attention again. “H-hey… !”

Your throat suddenly needs a cleanser. Luckily, there’s a glass of water you can throw back before you continue. Pretty good water, not gonna lie.

Crunch. Shlurp. Gulp.

His determination begins to falter. “... H-hey?”

You munch on the last morsel before it gets sent down to your overly-stuffed stomach. You wipe your mouth and throw the napkin onto the table, directing all of your energy into a glare towards him. “Done. Now talk.”

He looks at you, mouth slightly agape. “... I have never met an idiot like you,” he starts off.

“Okay. Cool,” you answer sarcastically, rolling your eyes.. “So who are you, where are we, and what do you want from me?”

“Hey! I asked you first!”

“Fine.” You shrug. “To answer your question of how Eris came to be obsessed over me… Heck if I know. Can I go now?”

“What? No no no no!” he screeches as he stands up, hands slammed down on the table. “What do you mean by that? Tell me properly!”

“Like I said, heck if I know,” you answer, shrugging. “I honestly don’t know.”

“NO! You…” He points at you with an accusatory finger. “What exactly did you do to Eris to make him fall head over heels in love with you? That.. Bloodthirsty Weasel, Eris. Incarnate of Chaos, Eris. My older brother Eris. What did you do to him!? Drugs? Blackmail? What. Did. You. Do?”

You chew on the inside of your cheek as you try to make sense of this situation. “... Do I look like I can afford all that stuff? And blackmailing Eris? Please. I don’t even think he has a sense of shame.”

He grinds his teeth at you, still waiting for an answer you don’t have. Seeing as this is going nowhere, you shoot your questions again. “Listen. I don’t know what else to tell you. Since you know so much about me, how about you tell me who you are and where are we for a start?”

His narrowed eyes relax after a few moments. He stands up straight, placing a hand over his heart. He dramatically takes a breath as if preparing to give a performance. He looks down at you with a confident smirk. “Good question. My name is Eren and I—”

“You related to Eris, by any chance?” you cut him off, curiosity getting the better of you.

“Don’t cut me off!” he shrieks, his face red. He calms down immediately and clears his throat, replacing his controlled smirk. “To answer your question, yes. Yes, I am. I am Eren Ermine, younger brother to the infamous Eris Ermine—”

Eren. Ren.

Your expressionless face reveals nothing but internally, a lightbulb goes off in your head and fills you with joy for connecting the dots. Then as fast as it had lit up, it fizzles and flickers off in disappointment as you realize yet another psycho has come after you because of your job. Or because of Eris. Whichever one. Great.

And since when did Eris have a relative? He never once mentioned this guy or anyone else— then again, he might’ve mentioned something about being the eldest son which does imply at least one younger sibling… They do look alike the more you look at him. Like brothers, basically, but Eris did say he was alone so could you blame- Oh! Now, you remember. He was that weird hooded guy Eris threw into a storage room at the hospital! What kind of relationship do they have? If you had siblings, you wouldn’t-

“Hey hey hey! I can see the glaze over your eyes. Pay attention!” Eren hisses at you, snapping his fingers over the table. “Jesus Christ! How can your mind be possibly anywhere else when you’re clearly in a hostage situation!?”

Well… it’s not the first time. “Oh sooorry,” you apologize, rolling your eyes. “Can’t help it. So you’re Eris’s younger brother. Good to know. Where are we exactly?”

“Wha- I- Ughhhh.” He groans into his hands. He sharply inhales with his eyes closed and exhales. “(Y/n), if you don’t do as I say, I will kill you. Got it?”

“Okay,” you answer. “So?”

“.....”

You raise your eyebrows and tilt your head, waiting for answers to your questions for the second time. You add a twirl of your hand as a visual gesture.

He blinks. “Are you an idiot?”

“That’s the third time you asked. Do you want me to be an idiot?”

“... Are you messing with me right now?”

You shrug again. “Not really? Anyway, you said you needed me alive, right? Why?”

“I can easily change my mind!”

“Okay. So where are we?”

“.....” He grumbles to himself.

“... Well?” you prompt him.

“Humans are usually afraid in these situations…” he mutters underneath his breath before his eyes go wide. “Are you… not a human?”

“.....” Is he serious? you wonder.

“.....” He continues to stare. He seems serious.

“Last time I checked, I came out from a human,” you put it bluntly.

“.....” He squints his eyes and scrutinizes you.

“What? Don’t believe me?”

“No, sorry,” he covers his face and starts mumbling to himself, “That was a stupid question. I already have your birth certificate and…”

You can’t decide which brother is crazier, your stalker Eris who's obsessed with you for some reason, or his supposed younger brother Eren who also seems obsessed with you (or his brother) enough to kidnap and hold you hostage… and get ahold of your birth certificate for some reason. What exactly did you do to-

No. No wait. It’s not right to victim-blame. All of this started the day you let Eris stay that night… Gosh darn it! Why did you let him stay? You should’ve called the police instead of crying in his arms that night. Oh dear lord, it’s like that one pet video you watched where the owner got a pet, and then got another one so the first one wouldn’t get lonely, and then next thing you know, you got a third one, and then a fourth, and then a fifth one because—

“HEY!”

“What?” you drawl.

“AHHHH!” he whines, gripping his hair between fingers. “You have the attention span of a fly. A fly! I don’t understand what he sees in you!”

The way he’s shaking his head is creeping you out like some toddler throwing a tantrum. “Why don’t you ask him yourself if you’re so curious,” you suggest. “You’re brothers, aren’t you?”

He stops, head hanging. His fingers drop to his side before he suddenly slouches onto his chair, like a puppet whose strings have been cut. “I... I can’t,” he whispers.

“Huh?”

“I can’t!” he repeats, almost shrieking.

You place your hands back on the table and blink a few times, leaning forward in confusion. “Huh? You can’t? Why not?”

Eren looks away, sheepishly. He taps the tips of his fingers together. “He… He won’t talk to me anymore,” he pouts.

…..

If you weren’t sitting here under these terrible circumstances, you might’ve found Eren’s shy demeanor a bit cute. It kind of reminds you of Eris a little bit. But at this point, it just creeps you out how fast he goes from loud to controlled to being bashful all of a sudden.

“That… sounds like a ‘you’ problem,” you state, sitting back in your seat. “And nothing to do with me. Can I go home now?”

He shoots you a glare before his face softens as he suddenly walks around the table and places his hands upon your shoulders. You attempt to grab them with your hands but find your shoulders and arms stiff underneath his strength, reminding you of Eris’s own cuddling strength. “But you, (Y/n)… I’ve noticed he hangs around you a lot. So… I’m proposing a deal~”

“Uh… ” 

“Or I’ll kill you,” he adds, a deranged smile on his face.

“I thought you said you needed me alive?”

“I know. But the more I think about it, you’d work wonderfully even if you’re dead.”

His face looks like it promises a very painful death. “O… kay. What’s the deal?” you ask.

“If I know anything about my brother— and I know my brother—”

Oh okay, Mr. “I-don’t–understand-what-he-sees-in-yo” Ermine, you wish you could quip. But you keep quiet and let him continue.

“—he’s already on his way here. B-B-But!” He holds up a teasing finger. “He’ll have to go through me to get to you. Sooo I need you to be hidden away until I k- I mean, he finds you. Okay?”

… It’s not like I have a choice in the matter, do I? You gulp. “He’s pretty strong.”

“Yeah? I know. I'm counting on that actually,” Eren says with a glint in his eye. “I'd like to see what our parents saw in him and finally get to… Hm~” He then releases you and takes a few steps back. “Guards! Take (Y/n) to the cargo hold. Make sure they can’t move, see, or speak. I don’t want to be interrupted.”

Before you can make a move or a peep, the waiters swiftly have your hands bound behind you with thick rope, eyes blindfolded and mouth bound, and a bag placed over your head to finish off before they carry you off like a writhing sack of potatoes down several hallways and down several flights of stairs, doing a number on your stuffed stomach, until they reach the destination and dump you onto the metal floor. They then bind your rope against some pole or column and then leave you alone with only the sounds of hidden cargo tapping the inside of their boxes with every rise and fall of… the ocean!?

-----🔔-----

[Some time earlier…]

Drip… drip… drip…

“Mother, you know when I said that ‘I like living’. I love it to death, actually.”

“I didn’t raise you to sass me, kit,” Ollie’s mother hisses, pinching his cheek. “ … But I see your point.”

“Great.”

“Still,” she adds, “they do say all is fair in love and war.”

Ollie’s father nods.

One of Ollie’s eyes twitches. “First of all, again, I am not in love. And second of all, do you hear yourself, Mother? Do you want the entire family to turn on Eris, of all people. In Agobury?”

Ollie's mother’s jaw drops. ““Most certainly not! But I want you to be happy, Ollie. It’s a grand thing to be in love, after all~” she says, snuggling up with Ollie’s father. He nuzzles the top of her head with his cheek in reciprocation.

“Really? How can you still say that—,” Ollie gestures to the scene behind them with both hands. “—when Eris did this just to escape?”

The light-colored walls of the hallways are stained with splatters of crimson behind sitting corpses. Guts and bits of flesh litter the floor in pools of red. Broken equipment colored black lay scattered about as if a deranged artist had accidentally made a stroke of genius to give the viewer a place to rest their eyes in a painting called “The Red Massacre”.

Ollie’s mother chuckles. “Dear kit, if it weren’t for the Treaty, we couldn’t just be in charge of the banks. If you so wished, dear kit, you should know that our family would have your back… Even if it is up against Eris.”

Tap… tap… tap…

“... I had heard… things about him… but I had never expected…” a female voice trails off, making her way steadily through the red lakes.

The Panthera family turn towards Lyn, who looks at the scene with wide eyes. “Apologies for the lives of your men on Eris’s behalf, Lyn,” says Ollie. “When it comes to his lover, Eris can get a bit—”

“No, no, no. They were prepared to give their lives for the famiglia's security… “ Lyn says as her eyes catch something shiny within the puddles of blood.

She sticks her fingers into the pool and pulls out a band.

A ring.

A golden ring.

On the inside of the golden ring, engraved in Latin are the words, “Love you forever and always”...

“Why would…” Lyn’s voice fades as a lightbulb lights up so brilliantly in her mind that it proceeds to shatter into a million pieces.

Oh.

OH.

OH.

A gentle smile graces her lips as she rubs the blood off the ring on the black vicuna of her suit before pocketing it safely and turning towards Ollie.

“I think I can understand Eris's… reaction now. It seems that we need to find and punish whoever took Eris’s lover, don’t we?” she says, with venom underlaced. “It would be a shame if all of these men gave up their lives… for nothing,” she spits the last word.

A shiver runs up Ollie’s spine upon the sight of Lyn. Her normally empty brown irises are replaced with bloody halos, illuminated by the white of her scleras. Unnerving, paired with her angelic smile.

There used to be a saying in Agobury that every time a May Devil smiled, the world would fall to hell.

An exaggeration, a legend, a myth, perhaps a tall tale told to children nowadays to never cross a member of the May Devils, lest they wish to end up found torn apart and devoured by stray dogs in some dark alleyway, but the sight of Lyn now reminds Ollie of the fated day he had saved her on a whim. 

The May Devils have existed longer than any other family in this godforsaken city for a reason… and to think they prefer to align themselves in the public to family-friendly gentle dog breeds like golden retrievers or maremma sheepdogs.

Hah… there couldn’t possibly be a god with all of these dogs running about…

And so, Agobury’s top dog and cat have decided to join forces to chase after the weasel who is chasing after his younger brother who has spared nothing to keep you safely tucked away in a storage room.

Until next time…

.

.

.

.

.

-----🔔-----

[Current]

“HEPH! HEPH! HEPH!”

You attempt to call for help, but no one answers. You have been abandoned. There is no one who will save you here.

…..

Stupid Eris. 

…..

Stupid Ollie.

…..

Stupid… Lyn…

You bang the back of your head against the pole. As if you can think about your lunatic ex who traumatized you to the point of making you adverse to free money in this economy right now!? You can’t even begin to consider pitting how bad being in that situation was against the situation you’re in now…

… Can you?

In the silent darkness, the pounding in your head starts to get louder and louder. And then you feel your heart start to beat against your eardrums faster and faster and faster and faster and faster and faster and faster—

You don’t know how big this place is, but underneath the bag it seems small. Too small. Too small and stuffy. So stuffy, you can’t breathe properly, which means you can’t think properly. It’s suffocating. It’s suffocating here, in this small space. A small space in a ship that is in the middle of who knows where, which means  you can’t escape. You will have to wait for someone to get you out, but nobody knows you’re here, and if nobody knows you’re here, you’re trapped. Trapped all alone. All alone just like when you were trapped in that place with your ex. Except you had your ex that time, but this time you have no one. No one no one no one no one no one just like before—

“Shhhhh…” You feel a hand on top of your covered head. A sing-songy voice clears away all of your messy thoughts and slows down your heartbeat enough for you to take full, deep breaths. “Fear not, dear (Y/n). You… are going to be okay.”

[yanyanderes]

Idk why but I love imagining splinter and draxum fighting to be (y/n)’s favourite dad. You have Draxum giving the reader the best lunches at school , you have Splinter telling the reader his stories before he came a mutant( don’t forget about the gaslighting). Gosh imagine if Big mama wanted to get involved , to be the best mama for her little spiderling even if she had to manipulate, it be so chaotic XD

mann this has been in my drafts for so long-

that thing about draxum giving (y/n) the best lunches is a big yes. he’ll give them a whole three course meal that takes account into their preferences, pickiness, allergies, overall tastes, just the best lunch they’ve ever laid their eyes on. and then the next person walks up and just gets a pile of goop, chunks floating around in the unnaturally colored soup, and did something just move inside of it?

also if (y/n) is being bullied he sneaks stuff into their bully’s food that makes them have to skip school for a week but shhh-

he totally lets (y/n) skip the entire line so that their food doesn’t get cold. also lets them skip classes to hang out with him in the kitchen. don’t worry, if the teachers or principal try to confront them, he’ll say he asked them for help preparing lunch, and if they keep pestering him, he’ll just throw their cars into a lake. no biggie.

splinter loves telling (y/n) about his past, going into detail about all the amazing roles he played and all the opponents he took down (though a few stories might be a bit exaggerated in his favor) while also trash talking draxum and big mama like- yeah, draxum’s a genocidal maniac and big mama’s a sadistic psycho, surely you want nothing to do with them, right?

lol big mama just kidnaps them. no use in dancing around the topic, if big mama wants (y/n), she can get it. don’t they see? unlike those two, big mama has the money and resources to absolutely spoil them! all they have to do is let her pamper them, never leave her side, completely forget about draxum and splinter, and anything you could ever want would be in the palm of their hands!

this is probably the one and only situation- other than the world literally ending- draxum and splinter would work together.

[causeiknowyouman]

In light of the blessing that was Frank vs. Russia, here’s some Dennis character analysis i wrote a couple days ago

Dennis’s childhood sexual abuse + internalized misogyny:

As a 14 year old, Dennis was statutory raped by Ms. Klinsky (referenced in s11 e4, and s12 e7), potentially resulting in his need to dominate women, and have a strained relationship with women altogether. In honor of Dennis manliker canon, I’d also like to point out theres a noticeable difference as to how he treats men versus women. Dennis doesn’t put women’s feelings into account as a sort of messed up way to prove to himself that he’s in control. Dennis tries to achieve the image he has of himself as “the golden god”, which includes him being a womanizer, inevitably suppressing his queer tendencies. Franks explicit misogyny and homophobia in Dennis’s childhood could as well be a factor as to why he’s like that (Dennis daddy issues).

Dennis’s eating disorder:

Another character trait that I think is important is his disordered eating, which is commonly {referenced in s2 e7, s7 e1, + s14 e4) I believe this could have started from his mom, being her “perfect” child. Barbra ridicules Dee’s body and facial appearance, which makes me believe all of Dennis’s makeup, disordered eating habits, and insecurities stem from the pressure to live up to his mothers expectations (Dennis mommy issues). No matter how it started, it’s very much apparent in his character, feeling lightheaded and fainting multiple times throughout the series because of this. His eating disorder is a crack in his built up persona, proving deep down, he’s incredibly insecure. While “The Gang Chokes” doesn’t explicitly show his ED, there are a lot of symptoms, such as growing weak from little action, and lying about allergies as an excuse to avoid eating.

Dennis’s BPD:

Dennis is diagnosed with “Borderline Personality Disorder” in s10 e3, which could have just been rcg’s attempt at giving him the “crazy” disorder, but the diagnosis actually represents Dennis’s character completely. People with BPD tend to have extreme abandonment issues, which could explain him leaving in the s12 finale. He left the gang, especially Mac who was starting to show more affection towards him, before they and mac could leave him. I hope we see this more in s16 cause I love it. Dennis has extreme mood changes, is self-destructive, impulsive, unable to regulate emotions, and has feelings of emptiness, which are all textbooks symptoms of Borderline Personality Disorder, as well as fear of abandonment, which I believe Dennis also possesses. Also the sequence of “Do you remember feelings?” and 6 seasons later “And I have feelings! Of course I have feelings, I have big feelings okay? And it hurts.” is extremely BPD.

Also he has a codependent relationship with Mac and is addicted to crack but I’m too tired to write all that and this is more proper grammar than I’m used to.

[wooahaes]

i want to be with you more (like the sun sets and rises again)

pairing: non-idol!jihoon [trsr] x fem!reader

genre: fluff!

word count: 0.6k~

warnings: food mention, one suggestive reference, mentions of a migraine + taking medicine for it. abrupt ending, probably, bc writer doesn’t know what she wants.

daisy’s notes: i forgot i wanted to go see a movie like. weeks ago. movie theater popcorn i miss u...

Jihoon could hear you sneezing the moment he came into your apartment. Honestly, even though he already had plans to spend your birthday with you, knowing that you were sick only made him want to stay there more.

The plan had been that the two of you were going to catch a movie together that you’d been wanting to see for a while. You’d sneak candy in through your purse, he’d pay for the popcorn because he’s a gentleman who won’t let the birthday girl (who’s, y’know, smuggling candy in) spend extra money for their date, and he’d maybe try to steal a few (or more than a few) kisses from you throughout the movie. Except you woke up this morning with a migraine and your allergies kicking your ass, so the two of you ended up missing the showtimes so that you could rest up. He’d listened to you make a couple phone calls throughout the day to family, and decided maybe he’d just surprise you himself.

So when you decided you’d take a nap while you waited for medicine to kick in (in hopes that it’d help get rid of the migraine once and for all), he ran to the store. He found microwave popcorn (your preferred brand, because it was deliciously buttery), a couple of drinks for the two of you to share, and whatever boxes of candy that he knew both of you loved... but mainly the ones you preferred, because it was still your day.

With his return to your apartment to find you still resting, he knew what his second move would need to be. He’d leave the popcorn until he knew that you were feeling better, but in the event that you were, everything needed to be cozier. So he texted Hyunsuk to ask if a blanket fort would be feasible (who immediately complained about how he texted him before anyone else... before giving out the information he wanted), and got to work.

“Babe?”

He perked up when he heard your voice, sitting up from his spot on the floor where he was spreading out another blanket (thank you for your love of blankets, by the way--it truly helped Jihoon make everything a thousand times cozier) to see you standing nearby.

“What are you doing?”

He ignored your question in favor of checking on you first. “Do you feel better?” He stood up, hands reaching for your own. “Does your head still hurt?”

“No, but...” I asked you a question, he knew you were going to say.

“Since we couldn’t go out,” he took a tiny step back, pulling you with him. “I made things look nice. I know it isn’t the same because we can’t see the movie you wanted, but... I have a few accounts--” Not all owned by him, since Hyunsuk was the one with the Disney+ account so he could watch marvel movies. “--And I thought we could have our own movie date here...” He paused, squeezing your hands a little. “Happy birthday?”

You felt sheepish, heat rushing to your face at how casual he was about all of it. As if throwing things together because your girlfriend had a migraine was the completely normal course of actions. “What if my head still hurt?”

“I’d take it down and we could do it later,” he shrugged. “Its your birthday. Even though we missed the movie, we can still have fun here.” While still holding your hands, he gently pulled you down onto the floor with him as he knelt down. “In more ways than one...”

You let go of his hand in favor of gently smacking his arm. “You dork,” you said. “Maybe later.”

He laughed, leaning in to give you a quick peck. “You wait here,” he said as he hopped back up, before pushing the bag of candy toward you. “I’ll go make our popcorn.”

taglist: @twancingyunhao​

[abundantchewtoys]

HS^2 reread till p407 - reaction post

So, in preparation of Homestuck 2 restarting, I’ve reread the whole first few pages.

First I reread the epilogues recap page, then the story proper up until page 407.

It was a good refreshener, because a lot of events were already gone from my memory or very vague.

Which, given the nature of Candy Earth C, is rather appropriate, heh.

Reactions under the cut!

That Dirk called his ship Theseus may say something on how he views his mission.

Then again, he declared himself the villain of the story.

page 4: he called authors alliterative, I wouldn't really call 'AH' that, nor his full name.

Rose really goes hard on the 'being a robot' thing. I guess between Aradiabot, Jadebot, and AR, it was time for someone to unequivocally enjoy the state.

p5 : Cool to see his 'omniscience' is only pseudo, like Doc Scratch' was. He didn't know about the missing landing gear.

Hah, and Rose still sees Dirk as heroic. Pretty blind for a Seer of Light.

p6 : OOh, I still had dark mode on, I realize. Let's change that 'n return to the old format, it influences the feel of the story, especially Dirk' bright text.

p9 : You know, it feels like a missed opportunity not to command him to shit his desk.

p12 : Okay, pretty sure I didn't spot Jade's mug on the well, flower mug on my initial read. I own that mug, actually.

And oh yeah, it was a three-year journey to the new planet, nice parallel to the travel time between Universe B1 and B2.

p13 : So, uh, Bro had a relationship with Barack Obama, I'm reading this right, right?

p15 : Dirk claims to have researched his trollsona extensively, yet doesn't display their blood colour on his shirt, smh.

p17: Riiiight, Terezi was aware of Dirk's narration, as a Mind player, right?  

And hah, as a troll, with Alternia's awkward synonyms, her roasting Dirk for his verbose prose? Gold.  

Pff, and I forgot Dirk was tired of Rose's psychoanalysis, too.  

p33: Right, both paths were distinguished by the arrows.  

p34: It's heartwarming to see Jake actually having mastered the supposedly basic (yet oft neglected) skill of housekeeping.

p38: We never really saw Jake have Skaian dreams, did we? His Prospit self never woke up on account of a peanut allergy.

I wonder if the dreams of a non-awoken dreamself could have ever been prophetic...

And anyway, he's his ascended self now.

Hmm, but right, his dreambubbleself did have a rather prescient twist to it, in the form of Brain Ghost Dirk...

p41: Speak of the devil, I forgot about this part here, heheh.

Soooo, wait, we're getting back in muddy waters.

Jake is from the post-retcon timeline, where Vriska was on the meteor.

But the ghosts in the Furthest Ring weren't duplicated by the retcon.

If we assume they only met the post-retcon kids chronologically (for them) afterwards, there were a bunch of conversations that happened twice.

And Aranea's ghost 'survived' the Game Over timeline aka got thrown back to the Furthest Ring.

Still, it's gold to have Brain Ghost Dirk be his own self, distinct from ascended Dirk.

p47: "DIRK: You’ve spent years feeling sorry for yourself, totally convinced you made the wrong choices and that it’s all over. And it’s easier that way, isn’t it? If you’re a lost cause you don’t have to try to be better."

That's the challenge for the Candy timeline people isn't it? Continuing to try even if it feels like nothing matters.

Brain Ghost Dirk stopped correcting Jake there that he didn't actually was Jane's running mate, since he wasn't that Dirk.

Well, 'I' and 'you' could be seen as located between air-quotes, of course...

P54: Jake being hopeful again probably triggered the return of Brain Ghost Dirk  

P59, 60: The new kids’ quirks are something to get used to again  

P64: Almost seems like a Hope glow, around the car  

P70 : By shedding his purple sweater, we now see Tavros is dressed in layers similarly to Calliope & Caliborn.  

P90 : Note how she doesn't even really counted Jake as part of her family, there.

P95 : Gotta love cross-culture influences on Earth C, like the carapace derp face.

P96 : Introducing the world's most pollutive missile.  

P97 : You'd think once it reached critical speed it wouldn't need the propulsion anymore. Maybe the sails actually serve as (stellar) wind breakers, hahah, and the giant pipe is a countermeasure.

p101 : Showing Karkat has started living at human hours since he's asleep at 5 AM, n'aww.

p105 : Meat timeline folks just keep on being couped up in small spaces for extended periods, don't they?

Meat timeline just really focuses on the cabin fever side of things.

p108 : I swear I forgot Dave pointing this out :p101

p109 : In the story people & the appearance of them in other's minds is important. It's the same for the old Homestuck kids.

Who they are and who they were to us are two separate things.

At the same time, in story, who they are to each other is also very important. Brain Ghost Dirk's a culmination of that.

p114 : Dave really just drew the short stick there w/r his best friends' fates, didn't he.

And Bro still casts a long shadow.

At least it's good to see Dave is in a somewhat good place. Just a little sad he has to basically be a hermit apart from some close friends to achieve it.

p115 : So Karkat never really was close with Rose, interesting.

p130 : I wonder if Dirk started discarding things "pointlessly difficult and irritating" as a way to cope with his isolation growing up.

Roxy had the carapaces around, he only had seagulls...

And eesh, being your ascended self, as in, knowing full well what you'd do in any situation... Really kind of sucks, doesn't it? Not seeing room for growth for yourself.

p131 : So, recap: A2 was coded blue and had a purple game design. A1 probably had the reverse.

B1 was coded red and had a lime green game design, B2 was the reverse.

The C universe is coded white (see: the door they went through) and the game design will be cyan.

Meanwhile, Dirk and Rose's species might be associated with the color purple & orange.

Kind of makes you think of Prospit & Derse, doesn't it?

Makes you wonder if the trolls in A1 were also guided by their universe's gods, or not.

p133 : 10:25 hours ago

p135 : "ROSE: It's amazing what pieces of inconsequential information your mind can recall at a moment's notice, a whole decade after they were last relevant or interesting to anyone.

ROSE: ...

ROSE: I think I missed this."

Appropriate, given that it's been so long since Homestuck ended.

p141 : Basically, Dirk's DNA was used to animate the result of the alchemization. Not ecto-alchemologization, but more like... alchemogenesis?

p144 : Trial 'n error creation of species, with of course, Dirk focusing on the equine & Rose on the cephaloid. (Is that the right Latin word for tentacle-y?)

Right, Rosebot was only a projection of Rose's consciousness.

Weird to think stories about the Psionic survived two squashed rebellions. Then again, he was )(IC's Helmsman for the remainder of Alternian history.

"ROSE: Now [Earth] is protected, in the steady hands of a duly-elected ruler, sure to have a boring and uneventful perpetual term in office."

Ah, if only Rose could see into the bonus stories :P Guess they don't count as part of her domain. ;)

"ROSE: What value is a marriage, temporary domestic bliss, if all is lost?

ROSE: You understand this bargain.

ROSE: At least, you should. It's one that was made to leave you alone.

ROSE: Is your resentment towards my choice about Kanaya, or about V–"

Not sure I understand this fully. Does Rose feel like she had to leave Kanaya because Terezi didn't give up on Vriska?

p146: Calliope embraces irrelevance as Dirk embraces the opposite

P150: Forgot about this part. Good for Jade, not being kept down.

P160: Guess Caaliope has a preference for orsnge juice’s strings because it’s a bit like tendons from red meat? Maybe?

Trials and errors like Dirk’s with DNA, but for food. Wouldn’t Dave have still have codes from the meteor trip?

P171: Getting insight into how red & black romance works for Vrissy, might help us understand where it all went wrong for Vriska.

P172: Vriska trolling herself there

P194: Vrissy - Harry - Tavvy - Yiffy?

P215 : Oh right, Roxy lived in the Carapacian Kingdom? So then Harry just went to and from the human kingdom for school? And the human reporters have crossed the border to report?

P222: Derpy black-haired kid hiding a surprising amount of brawn. Truly, Tavros fits right in with Jake, Jade & John.

P223: Gotta love John was waiting on the "highest point of the building there", while they had to "ascend".

P232: "from somewhere out of a half-remembered dream, comes the sensation of falling. A burning golden city. A girl's screaming." Oooh, [S] Descend reference!

P234: Ohhhh, their naming their daughter like so wasn't 'really' serious, but a result of a a game between them taken too far, I really forgot that!

P240: Forgot that Jane really did <3< Gamzee.

P268: And that the trees walked

P286: Got to say, Aradia and Dave’s unruliness reaaly meshes well with the narrative device of Alt!Calliope’s speech+captions

P339: Maintainer of Peace and Plenty is sure one way to fill in the role of Maid of Life!

P401: Candy John crammed himself into a house-shaped box in a spiritual sense, Meat John got crammed in one literally.

Got to say, I wonder if the June Egbert crowd will get theirs in the end or not, with what John was not saying here. Mostly it might be the topic of masculinity and how to fill that in, I personally think.

P404 : Don’t tell me Dirk & Roxy have the Hiveswap portals under their respective curtains

P405: Didn’t we visit the meteor on Candy Earth before?

Or was that in the Epilogues/bonus stories?

P406: “the natUre of space and time is a little finicky in here” as in, time flows faster? Or geography & history are just weird and inconsistent?

See: Jake having gotten send divorce papers according to the epilogues, or The Felt, Ms Paint & Spades Slick ending up on Earth C according to the snapchat logs...

"CALLIOPE: [...] as far as i can see, there's simply no way for Us to commUnicate with the world oUtside the black hole.  

CALLIOPE: i woUld certainly be very sUrprised to find oUt that anyone had managed sUch a thing!

JOHN: ...right."

Terezi & John communicated just fine through John's Dad's PDA. Is there anything the device is not capable of?!

Ooh boy, and now I'm caught up again!

Seems like the "prelude" to Beyond Canon is done now!  

Wow, feels oddly comforting to be in the thick of it again.

I'm just going to buckle myself to this ride again.

The idea is to not go too deep into analysis this time around, but hahah yeah, that boat'll float till it sinks.

[margarettelizha]

A Moment with the Fury

Olivier is such a fixture of formal mass that his absence is immediately noted and remarked upon. I’ve learned that the path of least resistance is to go myself, so that I can answer the well meaning and pointed questions.

Yes, he’s quite well. He’s away on business. His responsibilities prevented his attendance. He developed a very rare allergy to incense, it’s all quite tragic. Actually, he’s decided that he hates all of you, thank you for asking.

If I don’t answer them at mass, I will repeat the same conversation at every function for the next sennight. We rarely attend mass together: our busy schedules are already so conflicting, our orbits only intersecting for a sun here, a night there. It doesn’t help that I avoid it whenever I can. I’ve tried, in those long bells listening to perhaps the hundredth recitation of the exact same account of Halone’s virtues, to imagine a place I despise more than this cathedral, and each time I come up empty.

I can see my breath with each exhale, the vespers are cloying and make my head fuzzy, and the Enchiridion is as dense and difficult to parse as always. All of this, for bells on end, where one must sit in complete silence without shifting or fidgeting least you draw judgmental eyes. Just as everything else among Ishgard’s nobility, every mass is a pageant. Unlike Ul’dah, where everyone is attempting to flaunt as much wealth as they can, jingling along with each step, the game here is to be the most pious and humble. Who, among these somber and well painted faces, is the most devoted to the Fury?

Her statue watches the proceedings as impassive and unseeing as I have always experienced the gods to be.

I play my part with as much aplomb as I am able: subdued, unadorned dress, modest hair, jewelry that was gifted to me by Olivier. It’s taken me close to a cycle, but I finally have most of the prayers memorized, and I am much more confident about when I’m supposed to sit and stand. My feet don’t touch the floor, perched on the pew. Another in a thousand reminders that this place was not made for me, nor I for it.

The question of my belonging is not, however, something I am willing to debate with anyone in this room. I am representing House Theroux, I am seated half a dozen rows behind my mother and father in law. Another thing I have learned: not to expect more than a polite nod of acknowledgement when we meet one another like this. Olivier has assured me that I have their approval, and not to expect their friendship. I wish that brought me more comfort.

I do take the opportunity to pray, for all the good it will do. For Olivier, of course, for his protection and safe return to me. For my parents, their safety and prosperity. For our house, our longevity and that we are doing good with what we have been given. For the people of Ishgard, that they continue to prosper and enjoy peace.

My heart pangs in my chest as I offer up a prayer for Eir, and Sayuri.

Please let them be safe, please let them come home, please let it be swift.

I have offered the Fury plenty of prayers since my wedding, but this is the most earnest one by far.

[fanartandfanfiction]

Sometimes I think it’s impossible for people to be more stupid than they already are, but this woman at the doctor’s office has set a new record.

She goes to pay her copay and hands the woman an $11 bill.

The cashier is (obviously) confused and tells the woman that there is no such thing as an $11 bill.

“Yes there is, I just gave it to you!”

“But $11 bills don’t exist.”

“Then what did I just hand you?!”

At this point I’m gaping at the woman, and I’ve never seen someone so confident about being wrong. She’s arguing, they won’t take it, so she finally gives up and pays with a card. She’s annoyed and says to the cashier “well someone paid me with this, so obviously it’s real money. I’m going to give it to my son, he’s an accountant and will straighten all this out.”

I’m trying not to gape at this woman, but that is a sheer amount of stupidity I’ve rarely witnessed in person. Of course she comes and sits directly across from me. I’m the ONLY one in a mask (garbage immune system) and she starts hacking her head off with this horrible wheezing cough and then sneezes. She’s gasping and having some difficulty breathing. She looks me dead in the eye and says

“Boy my allergies have never been this bad, I’ve been sick for weeks!” -sneezes and doesn’t cover her mouth-

In other news, I’ll be starting a go-fund-me to pay for my bail bond, which I’ll require if this woman keeps sneezing on me.

[kristsingto]

Things I Love About Krist #1: PlutoMuffin Family

I adore his love for his cats! Some people may not know this, but Krist used to not be a cat person at all. He referred to himself as a dog person and still loves dogs a lot. On the other hand, Singto is a cat person (though he doesn’t have any as pets) and would always send Krist cat videos. A part of why Krist didn’t like cats very much was his allergy to cat hair.

Then.

Krist cites a photoshoot he had with Sphinx cats as what changed his mind. He was immediately smitten and went to adopt his first cat, Pluto! He’s been described as having a personality like Krist’s and gets sleeping in bed with Krist privileges (Krist is still allergic to cat hair, after all!) Pluto also seems to be Gawin’s favorite, judging from his posts.

(I love them 😭😭😭)

He would soon get a friend for Pluto in Muffin! This is funny because Krist said he liked slender, smart cats. Then he got that hairball. Another fun fact is that Singto does not like Pluto but is smitten with Muffin. More his type of cat ahaha. Look at Muffin’s eyes. And of course, Krist being Krist tried to bite her even with the allergy. In a cute video.

Krist is now a total cat person, and soon after PlutoMuffin, the family expanded with Khai Wan and Khai Dao, Muffin’s babies! They were named after Sweet Egg and Fried Egg. You can see the entire birthing process (and Krist being a delightfully worried/overjoyed grandpa to Muffin’s babies) on YouTube at the KristPWaveKhoo channel. Actually, look for everything you can find regarding his cats. The videos are soooo cute. 10/10 Krist content.

(The babies of the family!)

On a more serious note, Krist has said that his cats have helped him through a lot of hard times. Anyone who knows Krist will know how sensitive he is to loneliness and how much his cats have helped him through everything that came with his mental health struggles. And that’s how he went from not a cat person -> “love me love my cat!”

There’s more I could say (have you seen much of Krist with his cats? Very cute. It’s an all-cat meet up. Could talk about this for a very long time) but I’ll leave it at here for now. Just wanted to talk about some of the things I love about him, especially for people who don’t know much about Krist! Also, side note: if you want to see more of Krist’s cats, go to his cat account on Instagram, plutomuffinn. You will not be disappointed.

[wooawi]

I absolutely love the idea of Adrien Agreste and Chat Noir being two different people who just happen to be friends. Could you imagine the shenanigans?

Here’s a sweet child who has trouble standing up for himself and wants nothing more than to make his father proud. Would never hurt anyone unprovoked. Gentle, intelligent, and perfect by all accounts and the most talented individual you’ll ever meet.

Then there’s this absolute mess of a person who does what he wants when he wants because he acts before he thinks. He’s not quite stupid but also not the smartest individual. He’s reckless and self-destructive and would put so many people before himself it’s a bit worrying.

And somehow, despite all their opposing features, they are the best of friends. Chat pulls Adrien out of his shell and comes up with crazy plans for how to get friends while Adrien overthinks consequences for the both of them. Adrien becomes rebellious because Chat helps him out, and Chat starts taking care of himself more because he doesn’t want Adrien to worry.

How did they meet? If you ask Chat, he was helping Adrien get away from a terrible and horrifying monster. If you ask Adrien, he found Chat sneezing in a hotel bathroom during the first Mr. Pigeon attack and took it as his chance to get a break from Chloe. Same thing anyway. Adrien had found a feather stuck to Chat’s suit and started sneezing before he could pluck it off the hero. They bonded through their violent allergies and choking laughs.

Of course, Ladybug doesn’t approve. She says it’s because it’s dangerous for a civilian and a hero to have a known friendship, but it’s really because she’s jealous that Chat’s getting so much of Adrien’s time. Doesn’t stop Chat from dragging Adrien out of his room at inopportune times, subsequently getting him stuck in the middle of an akuma attack, or Adrien from excitedly waving down his friend whenever he sees the hero hopping across the rooftops of Paris.

Now when it’s revealed that they have a crush on the same girl…

[jodilin65]

I've already resigned myself to the fact that my TSH levels are going to be horrible, but I’ve definitely learned something valuable—something the so-called experts should have pointed out to me a decade ago. I’ve always known not to take vitamin or mineral supplements until at least four hours after taking my thyroid medication, especially calcium and magnesium. However, I’ve always thought about this in terms of pills, not food. I now realize that eating something rich in calcium, like macaroni and cheese or yogurt, before the four-hour window has passed might influence my thyroid levels. My inconsistencies over the years could have been due to this rather than absorption issues.

When Rhonda pushes to increase my dose and turns that dream into a premonition, I’m going to point this out to her. I really think I can improve things on my own unless my levels are truly awful, like over 20. I do fear my TSH might be in the high teens to low 20s, though.

Today, I’m not as cold, but I’ve noticed that my energy levels seem connected to my body temperature. Yesterday, I felt okay for the first few hours of the day, but then my energy popped like a balloon. I was tired and cold for the rest of the day. At least I slept well last night, and today, as I pay off my sleep debt, I’m not quite as tired, cold, or in as bad of a mood. Yesterday, I was so fed up with all my health and sleep issues that I just wanted to drop dead.

I slept last night with the largest nasal dilator in my nose, hoping it would open things up enough to give me more options alongside the strips. If the problem is what we think it is, I hope it doesn’t get worse before it’s resolved. If it turns out not to be an allergy issue—and that seems increasingly likely—then at least Florida stays on the table for moving possibilities if we find a decent piece of land in Central Florida. I’d hate to leave this climate, but I would for a worthy piece of land in a good area, especially if it saves us money, and gets me further from motorcycles and out of a flight path. Finding a place without sonic booms might be a challenge, though.

Tom got the Quest 3 today, and wow, things are incredibly clear! The only downside is that it’s still pretty heavy, and adjusting the straps takes some fumbling.

The passthrough is amazing, though. There’s an app called First Encounters that came with it. It places objects in your room—like puffins running along the couch—that you shoot at, along with other objects. If you aim at your walls or ceiling, it looks like you’re blowing holes in them. Of course, it doesn’t know what’s outside, so it replaces the “blown-out” walls and ceilings with beautiful skyscapes. At one point, I could see Jupiter as if it was so much closer.

Tom said he’s tempted to buy an app for $20 that turns your house into a spaceship.

It’s also so cool how easy it is to create guardians. You just glance around the room, and it maps everything for you.

Another cool thing is that you can look at something and ask what you’re looking at, and it will tell you. Plus, measure objects, and create level lines on walls if you want to hang something.

I might use the Quest 3 for virtual rides. Maybe we can share it for my road trips while I use the Quest 2 for playing golf. Yes, I’d love to have my own headset so I can stay logged into my accounts, but money is tight right now, and who knows if that will ever change? If expensive things would stop breaking, and I could stop losing crowns, it would help.

On another note, I love the new Recipe Hub on Walmart’s site! It’s fantastic because I can save beautifully written, easy-to-follow recipes and add the ingredients to my cart right from the page. There’s a handy little "add-to-cart" button by each ingredient.

[pacific-silkscapes]

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Commercial Plantscapes

Examples of Commercial Plantscapes on Pinterest:

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