#of course they freak out less
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i follow lrries here and from what i’ve seen a couple of them were excited about the pics because they’re f1 and charles fans, and some were talking about wanting charles and louis fics for a rare pair fic fest that’s being held soon, but then again i don’t interact with the fandom at large because the thought of it gives me a headache and scares me, so i don’t know what the overall comments are and i’m honestly shocked to hear they’re losing it because it’s just a pic, it’s not like they’re making out in front of the camera, and if they were well good for them!!! it’s such an overreaction
I saw a YouTube video of their pic together and most of the comments were adressing Louis 😭 " are you with him?", "idk i don't like to see him with another man Hrry might be jealous", "Louis looks best with Hrry", "This guy looks like Hrry"... You'd think he was proposing to him or something and it's just a pic from an event 😭. And it's ALWAYS been like this whenever Louis is in one frame with a man but never the same energy to Hrry. Maybe they think of him as Hrry's property or something or maybe deep down they realise Larry can not be real anymore and know Louis is a real person capable of catching real feelings and would end up in a real happy relationship eventually unlike the other one idk.
#same with women btw#of course they freak out less#but still with Louis it's way worse than the other#even though that man almost always has sexy yacht outings and sucking face with his gf#whereas louis is much much less of a PDA person
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stan twins the canon cptsd brothers i will always think about all your unaddressed issues that would make perfect plot fuel for your spinoff
and also the whole 'stan getting that poem by bill via a website which contrasts with bill getting one from the axolotl via a website' foreshadowing thing
like idk i would love something like su future but like more optimistic, aka not an accumulated breakdown that has to be mostly resolved off screen at the end :/// but something thats being kinda addressed throughout? (although would love to see one of them turn into a monster thats always fun lol)
stan having severe issues from his dad and those years of being homeless that we keep on getting more info on but never really getting confronted on (the drifter catalogue and tijuana incident...), him being completely alone for like twenty years when running the shack before soos comes along to the point that 1998 is noted as his low point, and him not really learning about bill+what he did to ford until ages after he killed him if he ever did get the full context
while i think amnesia and everyone seeing him as a hero actually helped with stan's 'i'm a worse version of my brother' thing its still a lingering issue too and we now got him being insecure over his own hands
ford being immediately thrown from 'being tortured by bill' to 'being stuck in the multiverse and being chased by bounty hunters constantly', him fully expecting himself to die when destroying bill, and him only now being safe for the first time in 30 years ....relatively safe, he's still in constant danger because of course he is
idk in the end the series wants them to be happy and they deserve it, its why i wasn't too worried about the book being like 'ooh bill is back!! and the book is haunting ford' thing cos i knew they'll be ok
#stan pines#ford pines#stanley pines#stanford pines#gravity falls#stan twins#as for the 'still on your mind' thing to me its stan literally thinking about bill despite ford resolving to move past it#or alternatively me on my same coin theory obsession lmao#me yelling and screaming at ouroboros being used to link to the axolotl and bill and how ford didn't actually keep it#which brings up even more questions about it reappearing in the shack when stan takes over#of course even if him realising about reincarnation being a thing i think its still way less to deal with than his actual issues#something something a same soul doesnt mean much when he already proved himself a better person a million times over#idk my thoughts on reincarnation as a concept is like eh??? anyway#also completely unrelated but stan writing fanfic means he knows what soos meant when he was talking about stan fics#soos seems like a gen fic writer especially with the ones we got as those promos#the train one where he comes up with a giant backstory for the setting that has nothing to do with the fic bros is super funny#but meanwhile we have stan the canonical smut writer who had to be writing it that summer#would he be a self insert shipper? would he projecting on the duchess instead? is he both???#i have many questions#then again judging from hows theres a wedding scene that he got super emotional over he might just be a shipper????#this has nothing to do with my original post#...or does it cos the axolotl last appears reacting to stan freaking out about count li--#anyway if you think this post is longer than my usual its cos i physically made myself delete most tags and put it in the actual post
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I started reading beastars so now HE's reading beastars .wait
THEY'RE reading beastars
#nobody gets a prize for correctly guessing which character yakumo relates to most#when the anime first came out and everybody hopped on the hype train#i scratched my chin thoughtfully and wondered.... would i like this? it seems like i would like this. should i watch it?#and all my friends around me said 'nah you'll probably hate it. it's really sad'#so i trusted them and ignored beastars the whole time. until now. when i saw the entire series at my LOCAL LIBRARY!!!!#so of course the curiosity wins out and i start reading it and i REALLY LIKE IT?? WTF WERE MY FRIENDS ON ABOUT?#this is sad yes but most of the time it's FUNNY? and also ANIMALS R COOL? bruh. i can't trust my friends' opinions of me anymore#anyway. due to the nature of my current nuca fixation timing. i kept thinking of it while reading#drawing parallels that may only exist in my mind LOL#i can imagine yaku being a freak over legoshi and his quest to become strong but not falling to his instincts and etc.etc.#yakugaru having a manga reading session in either o their bedrooms... lying on the floor engrossed in beastly tales...#these two would absolutely have a debate about which chara is most similar to eiden#to yaku it is obvs haru but i feel like garu would see eiden in a less.... prey sort of way#or maybe they'd agree on the haru comparison!! but yaku might hesitate to voice the 'mr eiden... has to be protected...' thoughts#and garu would proudly proclaim how eiden and haru share traits like bravery/outgoingness/super cool and go-getter/wise and worldly???#i kept staring down louis like.... you're some mix of dante and edmond... and something else....#UGH i like all the characters... they all have their charms.... they are all such creatures#honestly yahya the entire time was just relatable content and after seeing the way he lived out the rest of his life *chef's kiss* GOALS#nu carnival yakumo#nu carnival garu
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Sorry if you've gone over this before but I was curious as to what you'd think it would take for Leo to finally break in front of his brothers?
We’ve actually seen Leo break his persona multiple times throughout the series! And pretty much each and every time has a common theme present: his family being in danger.
#non au ask#probably the biggest break he has is immediately after Raph protects him from the Krang and forces him to leave Raph behind#not once in the series has Leo shown a greater horror than the moment he’s out of the pod knowing Raph was left behind#and he makes that break KNOWN#he shovels it down again soon enough but yeah#also noteworthy is his reaction to losing Gram Gram#and(less of a sad break but a still a break of his lackadaisical persona) when he IMMEDIATELY gets serious when Raph’s missing in the sewer#actually I think of Leo being serious about Raph missing in the sewers a lot#luckily (or not lol) for his mask these breaks happen mostly when everyone else is ALSO freaking out#so more focus is put on to the entire situation than simply Leo’s reaction to it#but yeah Leo loves his family SO MUCH so of course they’re consistently his breaking point#tbh tho all of them share that breaking point#cannot BELIEVE I didn’t mention it but his ‘I’m nothing without them’ speech ALSO HAPPENS WHEN HE THINKS HIS BROS ARE IN DANGER#it’s all fun and games until plot armor loses its durability!
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one of the kids at work is somehow a tf2 fan and was talking abt it during a project and i just like. genuinely cant fathom what it mustve been like for this 6-8 year old to be quoting the demoman video only to have the fucking teacher walk in and finish the line with him
#bee babbles#tf2#they were also deeply engaged in a fnaf convo but i was too busy for that#SOMEONE IN A SEPARATE GROUP ALSO CALLED ME OVER AND WAS LIKE. ‘i want to stab eggman in the head with 7 knives.’ and then left for the day#these little kids are such freaks. /silly of course. i wonder if they think im cool. Or if they judt think im strange#being a tf2 fan is far less embarrassing out of everhthing else though cause thats not rlly made for kids anyway#my Single W
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i seriously need more narumi and mina moments because just imagine the relief mina felt when narumi joined, similar age to her and was also considered a prodigy in the force.
to have someone to share the burden of the defence force’s future with must’ve felt so freeing. because before he joined it was just her, age 18, being told that she was going to change kaiju extermination with her exceptional synergy with firearms. and she was so, so scared.
narumi doesn’t have the kind of skills or talent for long range combat like she does, but he’s also a top candidate (despite his behavioural issues- which aren’t much of a hinderance anyway) and mina doesn’t have to carry the burden of the future alone anymore
(although she’d never admit, given she probably views narumi as someone completely shocking i just think it’s so funny how she stood there like O_O when she first saw him)
like i LOVE seeing the contrast. mina who was sent onto the battlefield for the first time and was deathly afraid vs narumi who was sent out and immediately took action because that’s how he always lived (fighting)
and now they’re the top two strongest captains in the force and they will be the ones to lead the new generation..
#egg boils#IM SOOO BONKERS SORRY THEYRE MY FAVES I WANT THME TO HAVE AN IMPACT ON ESCH ORHEF SO FUCKING BAD.#consider this: narumi teaches mina to be less serious. to stop holding onto the burden of others and her team mates and Fight because she#wants to. hold onto ur weapon clench ur teeth because you WANT to be here and protect lives and not because You feel like you have to ashir#and mina teaches him abt team work and yes you can work along but And maybe having to consider ur team members IS burdensome for u but isnt#it nice to have someone watch ur back? for someone to Help you narumi#please please show me how they’ve influenced each other I KNOW DAMN WELL THEY HAVE. I INOW IT. matsumoto please.#i will never be over mina and how genuinely AFRAID she was#ashiro mina my absolute beloved#narumi tells mina to stop being so freaked out all the damn time because you have your team mates don’t you?! always talking my ear off abo#about team work but you can’t even trust your own comrades?!#mina tells narumi that HE keeps acting recklessly because he doesn’t trust his team mates either!!! they’re perfectly capable too#ohhhhh i’m sick im sick i want mina to knock some sense into narumi and vice versa i want them to be the reason they trust their units to#SUCH a degree now. i want them to be the reason why they stand for their men so strongly (narumi immediately pouncing on no.9 when he showe#kikoru isao’s face. mina’s anger and appreciation when her unit stood their ground against no10.#mina#narumi#kaiju no.8#they’re my top two of course i’m making this shit up. i need it so bad bside please please please#i know she grit her teeth and got used to be alone when she subjugates from the roof top but CONSIDER narumi the delinquent but extremely#capable recruit being the one to show her how to live less in fear#i need a tag for them#don’t be stupid#okay that’s it that’s my tag#kn8 spoilers#sorry again. tagging for myself#narumina
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Anyone else use to 'train' yourself in case you went blind later in life? (attempt to do things with your eyes closed)
#during science i learned that the sun could kill you and if you looked at it you could go blind#and so of course I looked at it. for less then a second and freaked out. hesrd the story of these guys that stared at it and went blind#after that i carried a weight on me that id go blind too. slowly#anyway love how randomly at midnight i talk about me as a kid. another story about when i was little and convinced i was dying in some way#but yeah my siblings did this too 'training for going blind' so im curious if its universal. or if we're all just wack#text#august rambles
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Edward Woodward stars as The Man (named Frank in dialogue), a neurotic adulterer in midlife crisis, in Play for Today: Evelyn (BBC, 1971), Rhys Adrian's adaptation of his previous radio play
#fave spotting#edward woodward#callan#play for today#evelyn#bbc#1971#single play#classic tv#shot in the middle of the two year gap between Callan's third and fourth series (and around the same time as the short lived variety#show The Edward Woodward Hour)‚ this PfT allowed Eddy bb to stretch his lighter loafers a little and to play something slightly less serious#not that his character here isn't almost as tightly wound and as internally conflicted as David Callan; it's just that while Callan is#wrestling with the morality of state sanctioned murder and extra judicial execution in the name of 'peace' or security‚ Frank here feels#inadequate because his mistress has another boyfriend (who has another mistress). it's a slightly pathetic part‚ a middle aged nobody who#thinks he's embarked on his One Great Love Affair outside his marriage only to find out that his (younger ofc) girlfriend belongs to a#social group in which seemingly everyone is sleeping with everyone else‚ everyone is beautiful and young‚ and crucially everyone is younger#more beautiful and having more sex than he is. cue some classic Woodward stammers and difficulties and needlings and general#unhappiness; he does it all beautifully of course. it's an occasionally quite funny play tho also occasionally not; the very ending has a#whisp of bleak ennui tho it's difficult to muster sympathy for Woodward's age obsessed loser. the play is also fairly unusual for featuring#a fair amount of nudity (unusual for 1971 BBC anyway); mostly it's Angela Scoular as the gf who's in a state of undress but for any um ahem#Eddy freaks (affectionate)‚ there may be a few glimpses of some side butt to be found here. i really couldn't say. i averted my eyes out of#respect for his craft as an actor (👀)#oh! and in one of the later scenes where he's properly dressed‚ I'm almost certain he's wearing one of his Callan suits (complete with#black leather gloves)
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Those posts about quitting Tumblr as soon as you get a relationship but it's me after meeting my best friend tomorrow
#im not really quitting of course but i may just post Slightly less about how in love i am with ronald colman for the duration of their stay#we've been talking on here for over four years so tomorrow's probably gonna be the biggest day of my life haha#<- guy who is so so chill about this and not completely freaking out#fuck off me
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I think I may have fucked up with my degree timeline a bit.
#by the looks of things I’m gonna be taking like 4 extra electives#and having to do 5 courses a semester in my later years instead of 4#bc I didn’t realize I was actually ahead of the game in electives but also can’t access some required courses yet bc they’re reserved#for when you’re in the program ‘core’ which I am not yet#it may be even worse than that. idk#it’s not great. I’m contemplating taking a semester off at this point#why spend a buncha money doing courses I don’t need when I could take a break and go work full time for half a year#idk. I’m kinda freaking out tbh#I’ve been trying to really take things one step at a time with the degree bc my ex major made me want to kms#but as a result I now think maybe I didn’t put enough thought into this. I assumed some stuff and you’ll never guess what happened.#I made an ass out of me.#Idk. Idk what to do. I guess I can try talking to an academic advisor but I’m bedridden and course selection is less than a week away#fuck me man. I’m an idiot
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watching people from the states fight over who had the biggest earthquake when they don't even go over 7 is kinda funny
#also if they're not a thing that usually happen where you live of course everyone is gonna freak out#that's usual and honestly? you should freak out#like hell my city gets fucked everytime it rains because it's not made for rain#so people being concerned over an earthquake when they never have one? yeah valid#doesn't make it less funny when a dude says ''well i lived through a 6.7 earthquake take that''#cool! that's like a normal tuesday here don't be a dick <3#i was about to qrt with oh nice how does 7.9 sounds to you it was hellish#b.txt#wait i think in santiago it might've been 8.3#anyways it was a lot
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Dying of sensory issues (chilly but the air is too still and any time I turn on a fan it makes something move and I hate the sound and also it makes me either too hot or too cold depending on the setting) BUT!! Um. Thinking about homoerotic consumption soso much so it’s fine
#specifically the gentle quiet moments after the freak shit where like. daemia is holding pyr while he slowly recovers from whatever the hell#feeds her bc the mass to regrow body parts has to come from SOMEWHERE. sometimes this is Pyrric snacks. they ofc make it gay. somethin#somethin being determined good enough to feed back to her beloved something something raising pyrric’s self esteem by believing#wholeheartedly that daemia wouldn’t settle for less than wonderful something something#anyhow the um. them curled into each other#if it’s been particularly brutal. the moment when pyrric’s healed enough to start purring. it’s rough at first- of course it is- but it#settles back into the rhythm that daemia knows from them soon enough nodnod#also um. how when pyr gets stuck as big creature. goes to dae for help. he’s like help I’m panicking too much to be people shaped again and#that’s freaking me out more. usually it lasts till pyr naps or smth but um. dae company helps. dae SNUGGLES especially help.#daemia: does some evil shit#Pyrric: looking at her with the biggest roundest eyes with so much love
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text them shit about ur ex then, ruin his rep right back
just talked to one of my friends on the phone for a while and dw they already know everything I have to say more or less about him it’s just. I can’t force them to cut contact with him or anything especially without sounding like exactly what he makes me out to be (manipulative, controlling, whatever) so. as much as my friend has reassured me in a lot of ways I’m still sort of stuck at an impasse when it comes to Him
#believe me I wish I could ruin him as much as he’s fucked with me but. yeah#my friends are all generally very… centrist in a way. some more than others of course but. yeah#they won’t take one side or the other as absolute which is good in a way but also painful#considering how much he’s done to fuck with me and my mental state and my friendships and etc#I told my friend over the phone ‘idk it’s hard to just be ok with my friends hanging out with the guy who literally haunts my Dreams’#I am somewhat drunk now which is good. to me#I feel kind of bad for freaking that one friend out though he’s really the sweetest#and in a selfish way I’m worried I’ve just made myself come off as guilt trippy and whatever to my friends playing directly into my ex’s#image of me and etc#but I know logically that that’s. probably not the case. i am drunk so logic isn’t as strong as it usually is#kibumblabs#drunkish. drunk as I ever can get#I never get drunk enough to be totally incomprehensible or anything unfortunately#I just have less of a filter. as you can maybe tell#anyway back to cleaning the kitchen#I am glad I’m home alone#listening to punk breakup type songs loudly and yelling . because I can#EVERYBODY. PUT UP YOUR HANDS I DONT WANNA BE IN LOVE I DONT WANNA BE IN LOVE#FEELL THE BEAT NOW. IF YOU GOT NOTHIN LEFT SAY I DONY WANNA BE IN LOVE I DONT WANNA BE IN LOVE
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okay so for context, we're not sure how much we actually believe in ghosts, but there's been a couple of weird things that have made both us and our mum go "hmm maybe the house is haunted".
most of us are kind of freaked out by the idea of ghosts, but 🍬 is a lot less freaked out by them and if anything weird happens he'll usually just kind of say hi and politely explain what he's doing (this is usually while going downstairs to grab food or whatever).
anyway, we're getting ready for bed and as we walked towards the bathroom we could smell cigarette smoke, and the smell was strongest inside the bathroom right next to the door, which is weird because there aren't any vents to let the smell in from outside and nobody in the house smokes. the old owner of the house, who we think probably died here, was a heavy smoker though.
so 🍬 just kind of paused for a second and went "oh, hello. I'm going to bed in a minute, but I hope you have a lovely day" and then the smell pretty much immediately disappeared, and like maybe it could have been a phantom smell/hallucination but the rest of us are still just kind of sat here not sure what to make of the whole situation.
I want to say it's probably something with a very normal mundane explanation, but otherwise I guess 🍬 made a new friend?
#personal#thoughts#Lucy post#ghosts#unreality#<- just in case because I know this might be a trigger for some people's psychosis#but yeah we're not really sure whether it is just that we hallucinated really weirdly or if there's some other explanation#either way 🍬 is a lot less freaked out than the rest of us#he pointed out that if there is a ghost it'd probably be the old lady that used to live here who everyone on the street says was lovely#and then also pointed out that if that's the case and weird stuff is happening she probably just wants company#because it's got to be lonely not being seen or noticed or being able to talk to anyone for so long#so of course you'd start trying to get people's attention especially when they respond in a friendly way#and now I'm maybe getting emotional about ghosts
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Every time my mum throws yet another hissy fit although I can understand she’s being stupid and I let her yap to her hearts content cause she can never quit complaining, for some reason I’m so mildly bothered that the irritation makes me angry at every other thing.
For example : the fact that so and so hasn’t responded in 51 years, fifty more people haven’t even given so much as a single darn to ask why I haven’t replied yet or use those two brain cells of theirs currently fighting for third place to realise huh, maybe she’s going through a hard time ! Maybe you know like a decent fucking human being I could leave her a little note saying she can answer whenever she feels fit enough to do so but that I care for her, and the fact that I am irate by how care and compassion is offered on a silver platter to so many yet for me I have to beg and do the most absurd and pathetic displays to achieve even the slightest speck of kindness, and if I DONT do all of that in the one in a trillion possibility of me receiving kindness for free it makes me so disgusted and afraid because why the fuck would you do that, in fact why the fuck would anyone even do that even if I gave them my whole heart and soul anyways. All I am is less than dirt by way of reason given how I have been treated, and although I’m unsure as to why I am and that I can never fully understand the reason for why I’m not worth a single thing, and why I am worthless, i understand that that’s how the world works and I ought to adapt to my role and take it because nobody will stop for me
#‘u guys have seen how fast life can be taken from you’ well I hope it comes faster bc I have been praying for the end to come#for years yet nothing#I have not only been let down by this world#but I have been let down by God so many times it’s genuinely baffling#why can’t He just kill me already#I don’t even care anymore about the method#I don’t even care if it’s the most excruciatingly painful thing#if I get ripped in half or have my organs harvested or tortured for however many days#I think I just need to go and i need to go NOW.#practically the only real consistent wish I’ve had in my life is that I am to be something important to others#someone irreplaceable#but I am not even noticed much less replaced#and how a girl could yap on about her insecurity abt her bangs and within an hour she gets heaps of comments#yet for me ? when I write odes to death every other Tuesday it’s whoopsie who gives a fuck about her I hope she dies#that’s precisely how it looks like to me#I think everyone does wish death upon me for the simple fact that nobody asks#nobody cares and nobody tries to help#actions speak louder than words and everyone’s actions are very clear to me#clearly someone throwing a pity party over themselves for fucking bangs is definitely a cause for concern yes yes ! worthy of twenty notes#within the span of a single hour 🥺🥺🥺 but of course I don’t deserve shit so that’s why nobody gaf 🙂↕️#dora daily#my only request is for all to be blunt and clear that I am worthless in their eyes.at least my mum reminds me often.why can’t yall do the#same. at least she is honest and not mincing her words. listen I can handle much more than anyone thinks I’m not as sensitive as everyone#makes me out to be. so freaking tell me how horrible I am tell me that I am a chore to speak to that I am a burden and weigh u all down#and that I am some infinitely unimaginable list of negative attributes and that’s all I’ll ever amount to because I would send my dearest#thanks for you being so brave and saying it to my face. rather than being a coward and a fool for hiding behind flowery words and meaningles#nothings uttered just for filler. newsflash I can read intents and in between the lines well but I am not a mind reader nor does anything#imply that I can read minds. yes I can discern intents and the smallest signals but I CANNOT read minds#why you won’t catch me hold hope that anything I make will get hype so I won’t post it on this platform and if I do I won’t tag it#and why do people always get fed up or think I’m lying or smth when I insist I’m sick like wtf. or they act like I’m lying by embodying the
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torn between loving my course but absolutely hating college bc of . everything else
#i wisshhhh i could appreciate everything but i just have this inability to make friends#so i have this trip that is mandatory and realllyy coollll n i should be happy but i have to share a room for four nights w ppl idk#and im actually So nervous about it it’s not funny 😭#i have like two friends in my course and we only talk when we need something off each ofher#i feel so differentt… when im walking around the college city it’s like i see myself from third person and think#‘what a freak look at how she’s walkiingg’ like idk why i feel like such a ?! idk. i feel so out of place whenever im not in my bedroom#i thought id be better out of school but it’s actually a but worse… im less angry and more Sad#aaarrghhhhhh#this sucks bc i shouldnt be jealous of anyone else but im so jealous of everyone else 😭#life or bath for dry cat… liiiiifeee…
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