#obviously this week has. exacerbated things.

[scribefindegil]

Hey, if you're someone who benefits from a light box but haven't gotten yours out yet, friendly reminder to go do that!

[treason-and-plot]

“What?” says Roy. He shakes his head in an effort to wake up his brain, which seems to be suffering from momentary paralysis. He is on the one hand delighted that Michael is in deep shit, but he is also dismayed that Anya is so upset. It hurts his heart to hear her cry. But his dismay is exacerbated by the fact that she had such a strong reaction to the revelation- she’s acting as if her father had been caught having an affair. Which obviously isn’t the case.

“How did your mother find out?” he asks Anya, deciding to reserve sharing any of his personal thoughts about Michael’s indiscretions, at least for the moment. Anya puts the phone down to blow her nose. She takes a few deep breaths. When she speaks again her voice is a little less wobbly.

“The bank rang her about an unusual transaction on their joint credit card and she asked them to email her a statement. Dad looks after all the bills including the payment of their credit card and normally she never gets to see any bills or statements. The unusual transaction just turned out to be my sister borrowing the card to buy §300 worth of Simmora makeup, but Mum went through the rest of the transactions and she noticed that every week there was a charge of §200 billed to a company called-“

“Active Advisory Pty Ltd,” Roy’s brain whispers to itself.

“Active Advisory Pty Ltd,” Anya says. “Which sounds like a financial services company or something, right? Which Mum thought was really bizarre. So she did some investigating and found out it’s actually the company name of the owners of a strip club called The Pink Pony. So Mum confronted Dad about it and he admitted he’s been going there every week for the past year! And spending §200 on private sessions!”

“Well, shit,” says Roy. “That’s…that’s a lot of visits.”

“Mum’s devastated!” says Anya. “I am too! I can’t believe Dad would cheat on Mum like that! It’s just made me question everything I thought was real.”

“Technically, is it really cheating, though?” says Roy.

“How can you say that!” gasps Anya. “Of course it’s cheating!”

“Yeah, I’m sorry, I’m just trying to wrap my head around everything,” says Roy quickly. “And hey, what about your sister stealing the card to spend §300 on makeup? That’s terrible!”

“Roy, I don’t think you understand. My parents are probably on the verge of divorce over this! My mother hasn’t stopped crying since my Dad confessed and she’s talking about going to stay with her sister in Barnacle Bay! The last thing they’re concerned about is Eva blowing money on make up!”

“Well, maybe they should be at least a little bit concerned,” says Roy. “Just saying. But, ah, okay, obviously the other stuff is a bit more concerning. Particularly the amount of money he’s been spending-“

“The money isn’t the issue here, Roy!” says Anya. “You just don’t seem to be getting it! My Dad has been visiting prostitutes! Sex workers! I can barely think of a worse betrayal! P….poor Mum….” 

 She starts sobbing again.

[mohntilyet]

I want you to know you’ve indoctrinated both my friend and I into your path of thinking when it comes to Illario and the Envy demon.

I raise you this, since Illario isn’t even a mage before the Ossuary, consider the fact that Zara convinces Illario into also harboring Envy (like Spite, since Lucanis says he just ate something and he was stuck with Spite after that. Like she tells Illario he needs that dawg in him to become first talon, a double edged knife there (you aren’t good enough on your own you need that dawg in you aahhhh)). That would add a level onto why he kills her, Lucanis taking a crack at Illario and asking if he’s is good enough (I would’ve crashed out too tbh), and the lines in at the party with a romanced Rook (since that man also doesn’t have a healthy love life)

Envy is also twisted form of admiration/generosity/contentment, like how Spite was a spirit of determination, and the freak out Lucanis would have over his little brother’s admiration for him (an admiration he would NEVER admit to his big brothers face) becoming so twisted (by the same person!) that it’s also destroying him from the inside out.

Also Spite and Envy shenanigans would’ve been so fucking funny

YEAH!!!!!! i have been rotating this around in my mind and had the idea of that admiration v. envy thing for illario, especially if we're thinking about wigmaker's job where they cover for each others weaknesses. like a week ago i googled what the corresponding virtue for envy was and it was kindness and i was like yeahhhhh illario does not have that. we're going to have to go with something else. and i was thinking of admiration so this ask kind of made me cheer <3 thank god i am making some sense and someone else agrees because at any point i'm checking myself going 'actually would he do that'

i think they both have some level of 'i wish i could do that like them' but illario's is negatively tinged because their fuck ass grandma is right there saying all that too . like regardless of how great i think my brother is, there is no fucking way his accomplishments don't start looking twisted and unfair if my only parental figure obviously likes him more than me

i also like the idea of in some world where illario is less of a traitor and didn't set lucanis up (i have a rewrite powerpoint going on for my friends. so this part makes perfect sense to me but maybe not as much to you. i'm so sorry), and they both get kidnapped and possessed, spite-envy are the ones with serious beef vs. their unwitting hosts, who would actually prefer not to kill each other.

this messy au i have assumes a very fraught house dellamorte, trying to defend treviso while the crows splinter and follow either son. caterina refuses to let lucanis give up power and names him first talon, while illario has consolidated power in the year lucanis was gone and has several other loyal houses pledging to him instead. spite and envy exacerbate this situation, spite refusing to give up power + envy coveting it. this hypothetical plotline ends with uniting the crows under a single first talon (welcome back bhelen v harrowmont), and reaching an agreement with the others to work together. crow-on-crow violence you cannot be solved but you CAN reach a momentary tense agreement to protect antiva and the world <3

[kimbapisnotsushi]

i was feeling shiratorizawa + semiten and kawashira hcs so y'all know the drill LET'S GO

goshiki has 100% forgotten that he sleeps in a bottom bunk bed and consequently has shot up awake at the sound of his alarm only to bang his head on the underside of the top bunk bed

or the ceiling if he has the top bunk it's the same either way

also for some random reason i really enjoy thinking about semi and peach green tea. idk he feels like such a peach green tea person

fun fact when i first got into hq i made a list in my notes app where i could keep track of what i thought EVERY SINGLE CHARACTER (organized by team) would order at a boba shop/cafe so i could reference it for fics. i just looked at it for the first time in years. i apparently put down strawberry black tea for semi which still remains a pretty good choice i think

you know what. semi can be a strawberry black tea AND a peach green tea person. he goes for peach green tea when he feels like straying from his usual strawberry black tea. there i fixed the problem we're back on track

tendou uses the excuse of going on boba runs for the team to get alone time with semi. he'll be like "haha i can't get ALL the drinks by myself!! eita come with me :3" and semi just sighs but is honestly secretly really pleased that tendou would choose him out of everyone to run errands with

the greatest love language of all: running errands together

i actually think that, all things considered, semi was probably a little bit insecure and a little bit shy when it came to performing

like yeah he doesn't mind BEING in the spotlight. but he had to work on thinking he was good enough for it at first if that makes sense??? and i think being benched for shirabu probably exacerbates that

he's not used to showing other people his songs and his music!!! he's not used to being vulnerable!! he's not used to believing that he's skilled!!! because obviously that didn't work out in volleyball!! what if semi isn't actually as good at music as he thought himself to be?

tendou of course is determined to make him throw all these thoughts out the window

furudate please give us the secret cultural festival arc where semi gets a chance to shine because of his musical talents . . .

actually since shiratorizawa is a bunch of rich kids i wonder if yamagata has a smartphone bc i just think that'd make him constantly losing it 100x funnier

yamagata: "can everyone shut the fuck up for like five minutes i lost my phone and need help listening for the vibrations"

honestly why do i feel like half the times yamagata has "lost" his phone was really just tendou messing with him

like he's in the foreground running around looking for it while tendou is in the background snapping selfies with it or whatever

reon, ushijima, and yamagata like to go jogging together early in the morning. semi tried it once and then promptly decided never again

i actually think soft quiet early mornings are reon's favorite time of day!! he gets some peace to himself and he gets to see the sunrise bleed into the sky and he gets that crisp sweet air of fresh dew in the dawn and it's so so comforting to him

god i don't know how he does it i could never be that much of a morning person

however this does also mean reon goes to bed at like nine pm at the latest which tendou is personally offended by

reon the early bird riser who probably does yoga or some shit before meeting ushijima and yamagata vs tendou the night owl who stays up til three reading manga in the dark

genuinely how is tendou functioning at practice he probably stays up til three like four out of seven days of the week

(sorry i know i'm dunking on tendou a lot i'll stop now)

kawanishi will never admit it but he is so incredibly fond of the height difference between him and shirabu

it allows shirabu to fit his head perfectly in the crook of kawanishi's neck during bus rides and such and it makes kawanishi's heart flutter every time

but also kawanishi is MISERABLE during spring because shirabu can't comfortably do that when kawanishi is prone to sneezing like every five minutes

shirabu, teacher's pet that he is, is really good friends with the school librarian

oh my god . . . kawashira blue sky complex au . . . i would actually cry . . .

okay anyways shirabu kenjirou is really good friends with the school librarian and that's how he finds out that the school librarian used to know ushijima's dad

wouldn't that be crazy tho????? i'm thinking it was either the same librarian that utsui had or it was a close friend of utsui's who became the school librarian after they graduated and stuff. i'm kind of leaning towards the second one bc i feel like that makes more sense

i just. can you imagine how alone ushijima had to feel. can you imagine how suffocating it had to be. like there's plenty of reason to assume that his mom's side (and perhaps the mom herself) ended up disliking utsui and i wouldn't be surprised if they tried to scrub him out of ushijima's life

new idea guys utsui comes back and gets with the shiratorizawa librarian

i'm KIDDING

(mostly)

honestly i just think this scenario would really show off how much shirabu and ushijima mean to each other because i think that gets underestimated a lot

they trust each other!!! they respect each other!!!! they understand each other!!! ushijima who knows that he is to be used for his pure raw strength and that that's all shirabu wants to do for him and shirabu who wants to bring out the best in ushijima and thinks of himself as someone who serves ushijima!!!!! shirabu and ushijima who both think they're being used by the other but they don't care because that works best for them!!!! it's their way of showing respect!!! by handing the reigns over!!!!

okay that's a really serious oversimplification of what i'm actually thinking but i got like five hours of sleep and i'm running on two mugs of some strong ass lotus green tea i trust you guys y'all get what i mean

like idk i think ushijima wouldn't really know what to do with shirabu when they first meet in their second and first years. quiet upperclassman who is occasionally a jerk but mostly does not mean to be and his equally quiet underclassman who IS a jerk and DOES mean to be. they'd be so fucking funny together. they back each other up in ways they don't even realize. they could leave entire crowds in tears on accident

actually . . . the poor third years back then who had to deal with this first year they thought was quiet and composed and unassuming and totally chill. but was, in fact, completely unchill

shirabu's gone to bat for every single member of the team at some point btw. soekawa ushijima reon yamagata semi tendou etc etc. none of them have ever witnessed it though word just gets passed around to them like shirabu is some honor-defending ninja who only works in the shadows

and then it really surprises shirabu when they come to bat for HIM

i mean i just. i think shirabu is really used to being independent. is used to doing things by himself. he's not used to other people sticking up for him or other people trying to guide him (which could be another reason why he clashes with semi). it's not that he thinks he's perfect but like. he's never had people who wanted to do that for him before!!

but now he's got goshiki who WANTS compliments from him and he's got kawanishi who loves him for whatever reason and he's got the upperclassmen who ruffle his hair and swing an arm around his shoulders and tell him ot text when he needs help and he's just like ???? like a system error.

give it up for shirabu kenjirou everyone i love him

[the-judicial-assistants-notebook]

sits up in bed. so lana and ema definitely thought they were responsible for edgeworth "choosing death", right?

(the rest of this post was supposed to go in the tags, because it's not very well organised or written, but it got too long so. here are the slightly edited tags for your reading pleasure (or otherwise)):

i was going to make this solely about ema because she's the obvious one with her open adoration of edgeworth, but the thing about rfta is that it goes to great lengths to emphasise the connection between lana and edgeworth as well.

the sl-9 incident showed that lana grows attached to people deeply, hence angel starr's comment on how, when neil marshall died, 'she (lana) felt like her own brother had died.' with edgeworth, i think it was similar but worse. because he's not just a coworker or subordinate who's dear to her. he saved her life. and it cost him his own.

at the beginning of the case, edgeworth says he was mistaken for thinking that lana was always looking out for him post sl-9 (a statement interesting on its own because that's when everyone else says she grew distant), and, later on, he brings ema fingerprinting powder because lana asked him to. then, of course, there's the 'lady luck' comment he makes.

similarly, on lana's side, you obviously have the end of the trial when she says he did well, but there's also that additional moment post-trial where she's the only one to notice — in a group comprising her, ema, phoenix and gumshoe — that he's 'hiding', listening to their conversation. point is, there's enough to suggest that she might have been the nearest thing edgeworth had to a mia; his 'chief prosecutor' to phoenix's plain 'chief'. they're as close as two people can be in a relationship where one of them is constantly lying and the other is von karma's star pupil.

rfta is pretty straightforwardly depicted as the case which solidified edgeworth's resolve to do what he did; i don't think i have to prove that. rumours about him have reached new heights, his car and knife were involved in goodman's murder, he makes an unprecedented mistake in court by failing to connect the evidence room and carpark incidents, thus forcing the chief of police to enter the trial to do so himself, and he's publicly revealed to have relied on falsified evidence to secure a conviction in the sl-9 case, all of which only happened because of lana. jake marshall even claims that from the beginning — that if you trace edgeworth's rumours back to their source, you end up meeting one person: lana skye.

and it gets worse because at the end of rfta, she thinks he's fine!! she literally says, 'i was afraid the pressure would break you, but you rose above it,' and reminds him he's nothing like gant because he's not alone. she leaves the case thinking he will be okay. and then, what, like a week passes, and she finds out that he wasn't, and that he's gone, and it's her fault. even after she was freed from gant's control, even after she had finally stopped lying, she couldn't prevent herself from claiming another life. so much for 'lady luck', i suppose.

and the game reiterates this multiple times. gumshoe states at the start that edgeworth's ties to those higher up in the department have made him the subject of constant rumours, and phoenix says (in front of ema) that he shouldn't be held responsible for the forged evidence because that was all lana's doing, which then leads to edgeworth commenting (again in front of ema) that he feels as though 'something inside him has died.' it all goes back to lana. we can argue and say that it was technically gant's doing that caused all of this, but lana still took actions that led to it. even her complicated friendship with edgeworth isn't spared; it's that closeness between them that exacerbated those rumours. how could she not feel responsible in some way?

and with ema, it's rather obvious, isn't it? if she hadn't gone poking her nose into things, none of this would have happened or come to light. and, of course, she'd never choose anyone over her sister, not for anything in the world — it's simply not a question, but that's the problem, isn't it? it's not a question. it's not some hypothetical moral dilemma. it just is. she may not have killed neil marshall, but she still has one king of prosecutor's blood on her hands. and now she has to live with that. she just. has. to live with it. no matter if he chose otherwise.

moving on from that a little, i think it's actually wild how much of ema's journey to becoming a forensics investigator is paved with bad memories. neil marshall's death and her subsequent inability to testify are what drives her to begin pursuing it, her first proper investigation results in her idol's "death" and when she finally graduates, the person who saved her sister has been disbarred, and she can't even help because she isn't allowed to. all that pain and constant pursuit of her goals, and she's still the same ema skye, still that girl shrouded in darkness, always one step behind the truth, one step a little too late. no wonder she was angry in aa:aj. i would be furious.

[bengiyo]

Cherry Magic TH Ep 6 Stray Thoughts

Last week, Karan started living with Achi temporarily, and was thrilled for them to begin their married life together, and share in Achi's routine. However, Achi regressed immediately and started using Rock as a shield. This disappointed Karan, and was further exacerbated by Achi seemingly being physically comfortable with Jinta. We ended the episode on Karan confessing that he likes Achi. Meanwhile, Min and Rock reconciled thanks to Pai's intervention. Min and Jinta are quite obviously sweet on each other.

Oh, Karan, you're so observant, and he can see that Achi is uncomfortable around him. I feel for you, sir. That shit hurted for real.

Welcome back, Lookwa. Unfortunately you have to play a perv this time.

Ah, yes, vomit.

Interesting, the coworkers are less impressed with Karan even more in this version.

Oh, I like how much more expressive Karan is about how the constant disrespect he's experienced has affected him. This is a good localization choice.

I love that Achi noticing his efforts is what made Karan start to notice Achi.

My heart is swelling over Karan trying to do nice things for Achi without expecting a bunch of notice for it.

I'm glad we kept Achi being bad at elevators.

This impromptu bookstore date between Jinta and Min was cute as hell.

This is such a good detail for Achi to discover the ways that Karan has been taking care of him. I like that it's what motivates Achi forward.

Okay, I love Pai. She said she's gonna do whatever it takes to sail this ship. That's captain behavior.

Here we go with the passage of time not correlating with the movement of the sun in Thai BL again.

I love Achi going through all this effort to tell Karan he likes him, too. I like that he understood that he needed to express his own reciprocity.

This was really excellent. I'm so glad we ended the previous episode on Karan saying he liked Achi so we could end this episode with Achi saying he liked him too. Now we're looking at their first date next week. I am still a bit worried that we're not going to cover a ton of new ground here, but I'm enjoying the execution.

[scenetocause]

lil headcanon of girloscar for silverstone '24 weekend plz if u would be open to it??

i'm actually writing a chewy girloscar first win/austria/logan's 2024 thing that's all got a bit in depth and will probably end at silverstone but here's a little fluffy bit of side scene

It's wet and - Lando doesn't like it, obviously but - Oscar gets a unique level of miserable in the rain. She can't wear shorts or she'll get wet legs, which always pisses her off and then apparently her jeans rub her between her thighs when they're wet and the team shoes aren't waterproof and even though this year Lando actually made her request one of the proper team coats she really resents wearing it.

Especially at Silverstone, which he hadn't realised sort of makes Oscar grumpy as a place. He'd quite enjoyed Melbourne, with all of Oscar's people around them but the scale is pretty different here. It's not just Lando's family and a few early-years sponsors or something, it's the entire UK (or something) showing up and Sky breathlessly hyping that he's going to win and then some sort of patriotic collective orgasm will happen.

He forgot to vote in the election, too, which feels like it should be understandable given they were doing twenty interviews that day but Oscar had a go at him about it in some sort of stressed way and he's just not really sure what's up with her this week.

They're sharing a driver room because of the motorhome thing, which he'd thought would be nice but seems to be exacerbating whatever Oscar's beef is. Normally they hang out with each other in one of them anyway, hiding together from media and VIP commitments and getting each other off when they're not meant to be.

Instead, Oscar is glaring at something on an iPad - probably Lando's tyre data - and jiggling her slightly-damp leg like it will help the denim dry faster. It's setting his teeth on edge.

Her digging through his data is nothing new and he doesn't mind, that's sort of the point. He's had a cheeky look through some of Jenson's and Lewis' from 2008, it can't hurt. But this feels less like something she's doing to gain something and more like distraction or even self-flagellation.

Well, he's been told he's very distracting. "Hey."

Him grabbing her ankle makes her look up, at least. Sometimes it's best to be blunt. "What's up with you?"

She sighs, makes a sort of grumbling noise and pushes the heels of her palms into her eyes, huffing. "Nothing - it's stupid."

Lando has to bite his lip for a second before leaning into a cliche. "If it's bothering you it's not nothing. Or stupid."

At least that makes her glare at him, rather than the iPad. She sighs again, kicking her legs out and slumping back on the sofa, eyes closed like she can't bear to perceive this too much.

"You didn't - yesterday, you didn't tell me you were going to be sexy and I turned up in a fucking sweater."

It almost has him blindsided for a moment because this is a completely unreal thing for Oscar to care about. "What?"

"You were all-" she does something with her hand that he thinks means 'fancy' or something "-and I'm fucking dressed like a toddler. Because it's your home race and I'm not trying to - I mean, I don't anyway but like. I don't want to look like a bad girlfriend and it's just-"

"It was a sexy sweater." It's probably not the most helpful thing he can say but still.

"What?" She's looking at him again but with total incredulity.

"Sexy. Makes you look all soft and warm to, uh, hug. Nice shoulders, good to kiss. Like you could pick me up in the paddock again."

In all fairness, the first time had been because he'd only had his socks on when the motorhome caught fire. But Oscar carrying him over to a chair in a bridal hold has spawned a thousand TikTok edits that Lando can't pretend he's stopped watching.

Even when they're calling him pathetic, he can see the tender way she picks him up, uses her forearm to support his back so she doesn't hurt him, holds him close to her as she puts him down. It's a type of loved he'd never realised he wanted to be, until she showed him how nice it is to be looked after.

It's his turn to do that for her, though.

She blinks up at him, where he's perched on the arm of the sofa, avoiding her agitated jiggling earlier. It's enough to make him not quite launch himself at her but tumble down so they can tangle together, cuddling the way he'd wanted to earlier.

"You think weird shit is sexy," she observes, stroking his hair to take the sting out of it.

That just makes him snort. "You think I'm sexy."

Oscar's laughing, at least, when she says "Well fucking everyone thinks that now, don't they? Slutty little vest thing."

"Don't slut-shame me or I won't let you put anything up my arse." He nestles closer to her, gets a hand on her boobs, through her team shirt, in the way that gives Sophie a headache because it leaves visible crumpling.

"Yeah you will," Oscar sounds a little bit amused, still. "Who doesn't want to get fisted after winning their home race?"

When he's squirming his way through a fucking - he still has no idea what Darktrace actually is - sponsor session later, still half-chubbed with way too little time before qualifying, at least she's knocking her hand against his and giggling at their inside jokes again.

[green-cinnamon-stick]

Louis De Pointe Du Lac: A Study on Memory

Okay this started off as me berating myself for watching "I Could Not Prevent It" before work. And devolved into revelations. So enjoy my sleep deprived ramblings. Spoilers ahead for S2.

Okay why the fuck did I watch this episode knowing I have a week of hell at work ahead of me? Because now I'm spiraling going through the tag on Twitter. There is SO much nuance added to Loustat. And after hours upon hours of the manipulation that is Loumand, to finally have Loustat again is driving me mad. Because we got them back but at what cost? This isn't them and because so much of Paris is laced with Armand, it's hard to tell what's real from what we think is real. Hell Armand said the very same. But I don't mean the obviously not real elements like the trial. I mean the times Lestat breaks character, but instead of adding to what Louis told us, it's almost a complete rewrite. Which brings into question how unstable Louis' mind actually is. Louis who is attentive and consistently praises Daniel for his memory. Daniel who is not a spring chicken and had a very serious drug addiction for almost a decade. The man whose memory shouldn't be as intact as it is. Why does he recall more than the vampire who's supposed to be better than humans. Yes time warps things but complete rewrites? Is Louis' brain and memory that fragile or is this more manipulation from Armand? Which also begs the question, how much is Armand doctoring Louis' memory? After the San Francisco episode they want us to believe if he can rewrite a week, he can do more. But what if he HASN'T done that much. What's Louis' actual mental decline and what's Armand? We also still have no explanation for Lestat outside of Louis potentially being schizophrenic...........holy shit I think I just answered my own question.

Schizophrenia is a genetic trait. I've been saying it's the trauma because I wrote off Paul as an anomaly in their family. But what if he's not? What if Louis' own schizophrenia was simply delayed BECAUSE of the vampirism. But time is catching up to him and the immortal blood can only do so much. "Law number 2: The Dark Gifts must never be given to the crippled." The law goes on to say it's because the gift should be bestowed on beauteous people as a laugh in the face of god. But time and time again we've heard it can't be given to children who are also considered crippled, because their brains can not handle it. It has nothing to do with beauty and everything to do with vampirism exacerbating issues. When Lestat made Louis he seemed of sound mind and body, and he was...because it hadn't started yet. And a vampire surviving brutal injuries in turn makes them stronger. Louis burns himself his first day. The fall was his first big recovery. Then the burning in SF. He's gotten stronger which keeps the decline at bay. But he's growing weaker living in that tomb of an apartment. Armand goes out but Louis stays home. Isolated.

He tried to break free with Daniel once. Here we are again and would you look at that...his memory is suddenly coming back clearer. Okay I need to sleep before I dig even deeper into whether or not I'm way off base or I've cracked the code.

[cosmiccowboystuddies]

A Secret History, otherwise known as what the fuck Richard

(the last few bullet points will be talking about CSA so if that triggers you or makes you uncomfortable, don't read this)

Hi pookies, sorry for being awol, I've been prepping for finals, as well as annotating a secret history, and I had some thoughts I felt like sharing.

first of all fuck Henry

Bunny being the one to say " to live forever" is the definition of being doomed by the narritive

there is no version of the story where bunny lives, and by him being the one who says that, is in a way a challenge to Henrey

Richard opens the book by claiming to be a good liar, and in every situation where he lies he does it horribly is the funniest thing ever

Henry was a budding serial killer, and I think that by the simple fact of giving poor Charles those pills

I also don't think Bunny was as bad as the group made him out to be. Richard is obviously a self-admitted unreliable narrator, but I really don't think Bunny was as bad as they were making him out to be

sure he was probably really annoying, but the week before his death I don't think he was being purposely antagonistic but acting afraid

and in a sense when Richard found out about the murder, that was bunny signing his death certificate.

i think Henry was always going to kill Bunny, he was just waiting for a good enough excuse

when Jullian left Henry started decompensating like a serial killer, and that's why he lost control when talking to Charles

and while it is clearly the best choice to send Fransis to the police, Henry tells Charles to go because Charles is easy to manipulate

i think Fransis is obviously disalutioned by Henry from the beginning of the book, while Charles and Richard were still drinking the Kool-aid

Camilla is obviously romantisized by Richard, and I think that in all reality he probably viewed women in a simmular way Bunny did

in Camilla's descriptions she is often barefoot, and he makes note to mention that during the act of the murder she wasn't present

he also compares most women to Marion a person he thinks is too stupid and girly

people forget how physically imposing henry is, by Richard describing him it almost infantilizes him, in a way.

he is physically imposing which made him look odd, but he lifted camila with great ease, and lifts weight despite is limp

i think he hurt camilla by pulling out her hair, and hurting her wrist

i feel bad for bunny because while he was teetering over the edge he must have been so afraid

richard and henry could have been the same under slightly different circumsances

camilla is not as oblivious to things as people belive she is, obviously she is a victim, but the narrative implies that she is for lack of a better term, not completely innocent

she is a victim of her circumstances, but not completely innocent

richard clings to the group because they are every thing he wanted to

henry killed himself to achieve some fucked up version of godhood.

fransis is the most complex character because by the end of the book we feel bad for him despite taking advantage of 2 of the other characters in the book

he is also clearly in love with Charles but yk

CSA TW BELOW

okay so i think its pretty clear that Charles is a CSA victim

he very clearly has an eating disorder, and a alcohol problem which Fransis exacerbates by getting him drunk and hooking up with him frequently

not only that but he is really dependent on his friendships and is constantly paranoid that they are talking about him, but needs constant reassurance like a child

but also when bunny is making digs at the group, he starts talking about the preversions of the catholic church, i don't think that group cared, nor do i belive that any of them are particularly religious, but I do belive that Bunny was making a dig about Charles being molested by a preist

and if that's the case than his ultimate outcome makes the most sense,

that also makes sense why he would frequently sleep with camilla and fransis

feel free to message me so we can chat about it... this book has recently become my greatest obsession, or we can chat in the comments.

[pansy-picnics]

Hiya!

I’m curious, what do you think uknighted dream would argue about and how would they apologise to each other?

Cause I personally think Cass hates apologising, Eugene’s not used to it, and Rapunzel according to the show can do no wrong!

Oh, and if you don’t mind me asking, are you planning on updating Children of the moon soon? Sorry, it’s just one of my favourite fics for this ship!

Thank you x

God ive been so bad about that fic i swear i have so many ideas for it but this year has been SOOO busy for me 😭😭 most of my free time has been dedicated to drawing and playing games cuz writing doesn’t come as naturally to me ngl….BUT SOON ENOUGH I WILL LOCK IN I PROMISE!!!! its been crossing my mind a lot more recently snd ive started a little bit of the next chapter…Ur guys’ support means the world to me im so happy to know people enjoy it as much as i do 🥹 and i desperately wish i had more time to dedicate to all my projects

as for your first question though….LMAO yeah the show did rapunzel DIRTY….Honestly it really depends for me, but i think you’re definitely right about cass and eugene. and rapunzel definitely struggles i think to apologize Genuinely, because she can get really overwhelmed with her guilt and anxiety to the point that she loses sight of the actual problem. its kind of a rough spot for all of them

I honestly haven’t thought abt it a lot so idk if i know what they’d fight about Specifically, but what i can come up with off the top of my head is ummm

rapunzel is a chronic Fixer. whenever someone expresses a problem to her shes quicker to try and “solve” it than she is to just. Listen because she kind of has grown up with the idea that everything is Her fault and She needs to fix everything. I think cass and eugene can end up feeling really unheard because of this. Usually it’s just something they can quickly talk through but when put on top of other conflicts it exacerbates things a LOT.

Raps, cass and eugene can all be INCREDIBLY stubborn and set in their ways and they sometimes struggle to hear each other out. rapunzel i think has her moments, but generally she isn’t too bad about it; eugene has a temper and he can be VERY petty but i think unless he REALLY has a reason to hold a grudge against you, he usually just needs about a week to cool down- but Queen of Anxious Attachment Cassandra Tangled (tm) can end up going AGES holding a grudge and just refusing to check in with anyone. as you probably can imagine it does not go well

i think bc rapunzel has such a strong belief that love is transactional she sometimes gets trapped in a cycle where she basically attempts to min-max her time with eugene and cass respectively because she worries if she isn’t spending “equal” amounts of time with them then it means she must not love them enough. as you might imagine this causes a lot more harm than good….

cass is REALLY REALLY bad at asking for help and being vulnerable and especially admitting when someone does something that hurts her. i think this causes a LOT of really stupid miscommunications between them. eugene or rapunzel are both usually able to talk her through it depending on who shes upset at…and it really helps to have a third party there who she trusts because otherwise it could easily just spiral out of control and cause her to grow bitter and distant (As seen in canon LOL)

Ummm….To be completely honest i cant really see a lot of situations where cass and eugene like, Genuinely fight after they get with rapunzel. they obviously still bicker a lot but like, frankly after they’ve both figured their shit out i just don’t think they have much of a reason to fight anymore. Their whole rivalry has always been really childish and most of the more serious stressors have already been taken care of by the time the series ends. i think most of their fights are just over stupid shit and get resolved within the hour. i think they’d have to both go through a MAJOR traumatic event to actually get as bad as they were in season 1 again LMAOOO

How they apologize definitely depends a lot on the situation (go figure) but i genuinely dont think they get into Big fights very often…so when it does happen it takes a toll on all of them.

eugene i imagine is a little extra but sincere. doesn’t do Too much because he doesn’t want to overwhelm the girls, but probably just picks a quiet night and orders takeout or makes a small dinner to talk over. sometimes it can take eugene a while to realize when he’s fucked up but when he DOES realize it, it hits him like a TRUCK and he IMMEDIATELY jumps to do everything in his power to rectify it. he’s a big softie <3

cass is a lot more prideful than raps and eugene whether she realizes it or not, so its a lot harder for her to admit her faults, even when she knows she was wrong. she doesn’t like to make a big deal of when she apologizes because it’s really embarrassing for her. she’s the kind of person to send the apology text to the group chat and have to like physically put her phone down and start pacing around the room. To me.

rapunzel, like i said struggles to genuinely apologize because her anxiety and guilt can just become so overwhelming….she usually has to spend a bit of time away before shes ready to Really talk things out. When she is she definitely shows it quietly but clearly, she writes little notes with a paper bouquet and leaves them around where the other two will find them. they leave her little notes back and let her come to them when she’s ready.

admittedly i’m Not good with thinking of character conflicts off the top of my head, they have to come to me in Visions, and i just don’t end up thinking about a lot of ukd conflicts so hopefully this is okay LOL…..I would love to hear other ppls thoughts….. :3

[perfectlyvalid49]

I think a lot of us felt a great amount of moral hurt on 10/7, but that was overtaken and overwhelmed by the actions of the IDF in the following weeks and exacerbated by looking into the historical treatment of Palestinian citizens by Israeli courts and settlers

Hey Anon,

I’d like to make a couple points here based on what you wrote.

First, it didn’t quite fit in the body of what I wrote, so I put it in the tags, but I did say “obviously this only applies to people who are offended by deaths on one side and not the other”. If that statement applies to you, then you don’t have to worry about the post, it isn’t about you.

But you did choose to reply and identify with the people I was talking about, so we’ll assume it does apply to you. You say that your moral hurt on behalf of the Israelis was “overtaken and overwhelmed” by Israel’s military response to being attacked and its historical treatment of Palestinians, and I just have to ask – how is this not proving my point?

Let’s start with the IDF. The most recent numbers I can easily find are from three weeks ago and they show that since October 7th over 10,000 rockets have been fired at Israel, by Hamas, but also by Hezbollah out of Lebanon, as well as from Syria. Why is what the IDF is doing so terrible, but the continued attacks on Israel not worth mentioning? Is it because of the civilian casualties? Because those rockets are being fired at civilian targets as well. Did you know that one Israeli hospital has been hit by rockets 3 times in the last two months? Here’s a link if you don’t believe me ( https://www.haaretz.com/israel-news/2023-11-01/ty-article/.premium/hospital-serving-israels-most-bombarded-city-operating-at-30-percent-capacity/0000018b-8887-dd28-a7df-9897d1dd0000 ). Why was everyone so mad at Israel when a rocket (that turned out to not even be Israeli) hit a hospital in Gaza, but no one cares that pro-Palestinian groups are actively targeting Israeli hospitals?

And if you want to talk about historical treatment of people, let’s discuss how Jewish people have historically been treated in the Middle East. Did you know that the yellow star of David that Nazis had Jews wear originated in the Middle East? Did you know that they were legally second-class citizens there? Did you know that the guy in charge of Jerusalem in the 1940s was a Nazi collaborator? Did you know that since the founding of Israel the majority of Arab nations have ethnically cleansed their Jewish residents?

And I want to be clear, the government of Israel has done some shitty things, especially the current leadership. The settlers in the West Bank are a real issue and they need to be stopped. But to focus on Palestinian suffering while ignoring Israeli suffering was exactly what I was talking about. The leadership of *Israel AND Palestine* are doing terrible things. The civilians of *Israel AND Palestine* are suffering. If only one side is causing you to feel outraged, you need to do some serious thinking as to why. And I’ll give you something to focus your thinking on – holding Jews/the Jewish state to a standard you don’t hold other people/states to is a classic example of antisemitism.

[anexperimentallife]

Life/Health Update

The thing we've been most worried about is the damage to my heart from COVID and anti-inflammatories. BP has been slowly going down over the past few months, so that would seem to indicate that at least SOME of the damage to my heart is healing. Let's hope. Need to get all those tests done again to know for sure, but for now they've taken me off one of my BP meds, so that's promising. (This was the main thing we were considering trying to get back to the states for, so I could use my medical benefits.) The rest of the stuff impacts quality of life, but isn't directly life-threatening, so if the other issues have to wait, they have to wait.

The hole in my throat still needs closed up. That will probably be the priority once we get my mouth issues (below) sorted. This one is kind of dangerous, as food, medication, and liquids often get stuck in there, and can throw off med dosages and sometimes cause me to choke. Been lucky so far, I guess.

One place in my jaw still pokes through inside, and another is threatening to. If those places don't start reabsorbing within the next few days, they'll have to open up the inside of my mouth AGAIN to file them down. So I'm gumming my food for at least another eight weeks before we can do anything about new teeth.

We're able to get the eye drops that take down the swelling in my retina fairly regularly now, so here's hoping that if I keep using them for three more months they'll have some kind of permanent effect. Probably still need surgery on that eye, though. Sucks that this happened to my formerly good eye--it used to have 20/10 vision. Temperature seems to play a role in the amount of fun-house-mirror-vision, but we live in the tropics, so not much to do about that. (We live in the mountains, so it's not as bad as the lowlands, but AC is rare up here.)

I don't think the cataract in the other eye has gotten too much worse, but that's obviously going to need surgery eventually, as well. If I can come out of this with one good eye, I'll consider myself lucky.

Brain fog (combination of long COVID, ADHD, Autism, and a traumatic brain injury) is still bad, but not as bad as it was. Nothing to do about that but wait.

My spine injuries are still an issue, with occasionally arm cramping/paralysis that used to be JUST in my right arm, but now sometimes spreads to my left. At least the cramping keeps the muscles toned? (Trying to look at the bright side here.) Neck exercises and stretching help with that, as does ice. (I mean, yeah, there's the constant pain, too, but that's the least of my concerns.)

Still need that second foot surgery, because the cauterization didn’t completely take from the last one; not only am I open for another infection (like the two-year one that an infectious disease specialist finally cleared up for me), but walking is pretty painful, too, even if I’m not talking about joint injuries.

Joint injuries... Hoo boy. Definitely gonna need a hip replacement eventually, and probably both knees.

I have chronic fatigue now, plus every pre-existing condition and old injury I had has been exacerbated by long COVID. It sucks. My stamina is improving little by little, though.

Treatment for all of the medical stuff has to wait for one thing at a time to be affordable. My health was stable until COVID, but now... Damn. Unfortunately, COVID came around around the time we found out we were having a baby, and four bouts of COVID have left my health completely fucked and exacerbated all my old injuries.

(If you're new here, you may not know that the licensing contract to convert some of my old fiction to a game--which, fortunately, did not count as "work income" for social security purposes--got canceled just weeks after El was born, meaning our income dropped way down, and that a snafu with Eleanor's birth certificate made her stateless, which took every bit of our savings plus the proceeds from a fundraiser to correct. If not for the combo of COVID and El's birth certificate snafu, we'd be fine both medically and financially.)

I'm working on plotting out more Quiet World and Alex And stuff, which I'll be shopping around, but frankly, even if it sells, it probably won't be much. (If you were here in 2013, you may remember that I had just started to have success selling my fiction to pro markets when my sons died, which threw me for a loop for several years, so I have to start over building a reputation.)

We've considered a move back to the US to use my medical benefits, but a) that'd be expensive af, and b) the US may be on the edge of becoming a military dictatorship, so even if we had the money for it, we'd want to wait to see what November holds.

So yeah, that's what's been going on with my health and our finances. As always, @thesurestthing and Baby El bring me joy, and my sort-of-adopted niece @geniussheepworld is a great help to all of us.

With so many people in the world suffering so much, I am reluctant to post a funding link. We are MOSTLY financially stable--it's just that we have to save up for my medical stuff while we work to finish paying off about 11K USD of debt from El's paperwork thing and all the medical whammies (and thank you to everyone who has helped already)--but if you want to help with that, the best link is either our paypal donation link or Ko-Fi.

[kasienda]

yin and yang, chapter 4, “Adrien somehow made it through the whole day.”

Adrien somehow made it through the whole day. Marinette had never shown up. He had texted her, but she hadn’t responded yet. He tried not to panic.  “Do you think she’s okay?” Adrien asked Tikki.  Tikki smiled warmly. “I’m certain that if she wasn’t, you’d be the first person she would call.”  He let out a sigh of relief. Tikki was right. He normally got pulled from class for a day for all sorts of reasons. There was no reason to freak out.  But he missed her. Her presence had a way of soothing his anxiety if only because she could give him hints through every interaction.  He slipped through the doors of the bakery. Marinette’s mother was at the front and smiled at him brightly. Something in his chest squirmed. Marinette’s parents were so nice.  “Hey sweetie! How was school?”  “It was great!” Adrien assured her with a smile, but Sabine’s smile actually faltered. “Come here, Xīngān.” Adrien stepped around the counter, every muscle locked in tension as his heart pounded in his chest, once again completely uncertain as to what he did wrong. Sabine’s arms wrapped around him and pulled him into a hug. “You don’t have to pretend, you know. Not when you’re at home.” “Pretend?” he echoed. Had Sabine already figured him out? He didn’t think so. She was holding him and referring to him by the sweetest of Mandarin nicknames. She wouldn’t do that if she knew.  “Pretend that you’re okay,” she said, like it was obvious.  Adrien didn’t know what to say. What was she asking him to do? Break down into tears in her arms or whine about his day?  Neither would have been tolerated by his father.  She was stroking his hair, and he finally felt himself melt into her embrace. “I know, m-maman,” he said, trying hard not to stumble over the familial title and failing. After a week, it hadn’t gotten any easier. “I’m just tired.” Sabine nodded. “Well, if you want to take a nap, I’m sure your papa would understand.” “What?” “It’s Wednesday! Did you forget?” “I guess I just lost track of the days. He’s in the back?” Adrien pointed towards the bakery.  Sabine smiled. “As always,” she said. She kissed his forehead. “Have fun, okay?”  Adrien entered the back room of the bakery with only a little trepidation. Sabine has just told him to have fun, so it couldn’t be anything bad, right? Was this an every Wednesday thing that Marinette had forgotten to mention? Or a this Wednesday thing? Marinette didn’t have a calendar telling him where to be and when.  He was rapidly discovering that he didn’t know what to do with himself and all the unstructured time.  Tom’s whole face lit up when Adrien entered. It was surreal. Adrien’s father never looked at him with such open joy.  “There you are, cupcake! How was your day?”  “It was fine,” Adrien said. Tom was in the middle of decorating cookies and there was obviously a spot right next to him, waiting for Marinette to fill.

At some point, I had read an article about people who grow up in abusive dynamics - where a lot of the time they actually have a hard time in healthy relationships because their brain doesn't believe that it's real. They're actually more stressed out because they're waiting for the other shoe to drop at all times and when it doesn't, that just puts them even more on edge. I was trying to capture a little bit of that dynamic in Adrien's interactions with Marinette's parents.

He's always ready for his father to start in on the criticism, he's bracing himself for it at all times. So when he's Marinette with her parents he's still expecting that to happen at some point. That he's going to make a mistake at some point and they'll come down on him hard. This is all exacerbated by the fact that he's trying to pretend to be Marinette at the same time and is nervous about them figuring out that he's not.

Then it's all made just a little bit more stressful by the fact that his own mother is not around, and so just addressing anyone as mom brings all that up for him. And that in some ways, this is what Adrien wishes his family life was like. So he wants it, craves it, but is also terrified of stealing it from Marinette. ... Director's Ask Game if you want me to do another scene/snippet from any of my fics!

Link to the fic if you want to keep reading! Haha!

[theycallmebecca]

Drabble: What Andy Wants

By popular request, I bring y'all the follow to the drabble I wrote last week for @the-slumberparty "What Women Want". Today's drabble is also for Navy and Roo's Sleepover for the Week 2 theme of "Blast from the Past" which was to write something as a continuation of another piece.

And yes... I am planning a follow up to this... 😘

Title: What Andy Wants

Pairing: Andy Barber x female reader

Rating: PG

Warnings: n/a

Disclaimer: This work of fiction is not to be reposted, used or translated without my permission.

Usage Disclaimer: This work is for fans only. This author does not give permission for it to be shared, spoken of, referred to in any public manner (podcast, tv, online, etc.) that wants to either make a celebrity uncomfortable, mock fan fiction/fandom in any way, or the author themselves. Requests can be made, but it is unlikely the author will change their mind. If no response is given to a request then the answer is a solid no, not interested and the work cannot be shared, spoken of or even referred to, regardless of the manner or context. 

After Valentine’s Day, everything changes.

Ok, so not obviously to anyone outside of yours and Andy’s friendship, but things are different.

Andy seems more in tuned to you; your likes, your dislikes and what’s going on in your life.

Or maybe it’s the same as it’s always been, but you’re just hyper aware of everything he does or says as you try to figure out what his feelings are.

That’s your other best friend’s theory, anyway.

“You’ve liked him for so long that I think you’re scared shitless that what Andy might want is you,” she states as the two of you have brunch the Sunday after Valentine’s Day.

“Or he was just being nice and didn’t want me feeling left out on Valentine’s Day,” you argue. “He delivered them to my house, remember, not at work.”

“That’s because they were for you!” she exclaims in an exacerbated tone. “They weren’t for everyone else! They were just for you so you-”

She stops suddenly and you narrow your eyes at her as you realize she knows more than she is telling you. Especially since she is defending Andy so much.

Having two best friends has always been tricky, especially because of jealousy in time spent. Part of the reason you and your best friend have brunch every Sunday (alternating apartments because you’re both broke) is because she felt Andy was hogging all of your time.

“What do you know?” you ask her.

“Only that Andy wants you,” she replies. “But if you tell him I told you that, he’ll murder me.”

You sit back stunned. Andy likes you and he told your best friend before he told you?

“He wants to ease you into the idea,” your friend offers. “But he definitely wants you and he has a plan.”

“And did you tell him that I’ve liked him for years?” you ask her.

She gasps in mock offense. “I did not,” she retorts. “I don’t tell secrets.” You raise your eyebrow. “Much… and I might have alluded to the fact that you would be open to something with him.”

You don’t believe for a second that it’s all she told him, but before you can ask further questions, she says, “No more talking about Andy, it’s my time.”

You know she’s joking, at least somewhat, but you nod your head and zip your lips. The two of you will talk about Andy again later, but she’s right, brunch is her time.

[flamingplay]

Interview: Everything Everything’s Jonathan Higgs on AI, Education, & New LP ‘Mountainhead’

by Eric Schuster

Atwood Magazine: Each album you all release has a unique style and theme. I read that Mountainhead draws from an allegory regarding “an alternate society whose existence is dedicated to endlessly growing a mountain by digging deeper at its foot — all in pursuit of a mythical mirror that sits atop its peak while avoiding a massive golden snake that lives in the pit below.” What are some of your favorite sci-fi films or novels?

Jonathan Higgs: Definitely Predator. Definitely Terminator. I like any sort of sci-fi slasher genre like that, like Alien where there’s people being picked off by a monster. It’s not very close to what I’ve written though, for this album. Yeah, I think I was looking for something that was simple enough to say in one sentence, but that could have a huge amount of different meanings if you wanted it to. I guess it would be something like, I don’t even know. It’s way too simple for a film. I think it would have to develop a hell of a lot more, but I think in terms of music, it’s sort of enough to hang everything off without it getting too complex and too bogged down with these rules of the world. It was more like, no, there’s just this big one, big idea and everything is sort of under the shadow of that rather than getting too conceptual kind of puts me off if particularly if albums get too wrapped up in detail and all that stuff. It’s fine for films or novels, it’s essential. But I think when you are making something like an album, it needs to be, the songs need to live without that knowledge. They need to be able to be good by themselves

That’s why it has such a simple setup, because I think anything, I think you can go a bit further, but I want you to keep it really monolithic and simple.

You tackle some big issues in Mountainhead, like the unsustainability of unlimited growth and income inequality and Raw Data Feel tackled the problems associated with AI. Do you see AI helping or exacerbating these issues?

Jonathan Higgs: I think it’ll help a little bit. I don’t see why it would make things worse. It’ll probably be some big tech advances that it’ll help speed up things like sustainability is the big one that everyone’s trying to do, so I don’t see how that could make things worse, but it does, of course, rely on some kind of thing. They keep mining for chips, right? I can’t remember. But there is quite a big environmental impact of making the brains of AI and obviously we’ve seen with crypto what sort of length people will go to improve their computing power and how much energy that uses, et cetera, et cetera. But no, I think it’s probably going to help bring about some of the stuff that we need to happen a bit more quickly, like renewable, wherever that may be. Some kind of advancement will probably occur thanks to ai, but it’s not just a one solution type thing. It’s more like it just looks through the options much more quickly. That’s kind of how I feel about it.

You all are very academic and methodical in your approach to writing music and creating art. Do you have any artists that you are currently listening to that are also pushing the boundaries of music?

Jonathan Higgs: I’m more in touch with what some visual people are doing. There’s this guy called Umami who makes these amazing short videos and he’s made this big long series of them and he does do music in it as well, but it’s primarily like an animation project, and I follow a lot of 3D horror guys. I mean, that’s not music either, really. And I guess musically, oh man, this year has been thin on the ground. It’s only a month in, it’s only a few weeks in. I don’t know. I’m not really tuned into anything new at the moment. I guess it’s because I’m working on other projects, I’m just trying to clear my head of musical stuff at the moment, so I can’t suggest anything.

Your website Edexhell mocked the exam quality that you were issued in school, what do you think of the current state of education?

Jonathan Higgs: I have no idea, is the truth. I don’t have any connection to people of that age. Well, my brother’s kids I guess are teenagers, but it’s Scotland and things tend to be better up there anyway. I don’t actually know. Actually, just about an hour ago I read a report saying that girls are doing better than boys at every age from primary up to uni. And that made me ponder for a moment. I dunno if that’s a problem with education, but there’s definitely something going on there, which is pretty odd. But also my mom, she’s retired now, but she was a teacher and teachers used to get it in the neck so much when I was growing up that I kind of made a soft promise to myself never to diss the education. Well, teachers in particular, I think it’s generally the same as it was. I don’t know, is the truth. I’m not involved.

Did you all see the movie Everything Everything and if so what did you think? How do you feel that they co-opted your name?

Jonathan Higgs: No, we didn’t see it. We were not very pleased with that, to be honest. It meant that 99% of Google searches for us just end up with that. Nothing against the film, but it can fuck off.

What job do you think you would have if you were not a musician?

Jonathan Higgs: I’d be in movies. I think I’d be making them, not in them. I’d be somewhere along the creative line, hopefully directing, but who knows? I could happily do that now. I do that now. I’ve directed, most of our music videos have been by me, so yeah, I enjoy that hugely.

Do you have any favorite directors?

Jonathan Higgs: Yeah, well, there’s a lot of good ones at the moment, aren’t there? I really liked Robert Eggers. I thought The Northman was brilliant. I know it was a bit silly, but I absolutely loved it. I just saw Poor Things. I thought that was pretty good. I think it’s actually a pretty great time for film at the moment. This year’s last year’s Oscar bait sort of, well, not Oscar bait, but just the things that are about to get awards in about a month and lots of really great stuff. I thought Anatomy of a Fall was amazing. I’ll always watch whatever Ridley s Scott’s up to. Yeah, I prefer, I get more excited, not prefer, but I get more excited about movies than albums recently just because I’m not, I feel like I’m so in bed with music that it’s a bit like work sometimes and movies is a bit more like I can be a fan rather than somebody who’s involved.

You mentioned that the mirror at the top of Mountainhead represents the fact that even if “you’ve got it all, what have you really got?” What is your favorite material item that you own and why?

Jonathan Higgs: Oh, my PC, no question. I’ve had a PC since I was in middle school, and then there was a long period where I didn’t have one and then I got one again and I was like, fuck, why did I have that period in my life without one? It’s the best tool a human has ever created, easily outside of the stick. It’s brilliant. I absolutely love it for creating. The power I have as one person now compared to when I was a kid on a computer is just extraordinary. The things I can make, the level of quality that you can make now the consumer can make is astounding.

This album deals with what it means to be a “human,” which is something that has been explored for centuries but has gotten harder to define as technology has infiltrated our everyday lives. What do you think are the best ways to connect with other people?

Jonathan Higgs: Sitting round a fire, the oldest one, it’s always being the best one, but if you can’t do that, then face-to-Face Place with breathable air is probably the next best thing. And obviously you can’t always do that, but doing what we’re doing now is okay.

A lot of songwriters seem to slow down as their careers progress, but you all are as prolific as ever, perhaps even more so now. Where do you find the creative energy (and literal energy) to keep creating such thought-provoking and high-intensity albums?

Jonathan Higgs: Well, I don’t have kids, so I’ve got all the energy I ever had, and a lot of my job is sitting down, so to be honest, I could use up more of my energy. In fact, a lot of my songs are about the fact that I don’t use my energy, don’t use my body. So I’ve never had a problem with that. We don’t really get, well, I don’t really get drained of juice because I don’t think making an album is very difficult. Really. We’ve done it seven times and making another one doesn’t sound difficult either. Making a good album is quite hard though.

You said it's not very physical, but that music video for Cold Reactor, you guys are out there in the cold and that looked pretty physical.

Jonathan Higgs: Well, that was a big day. We actually made five music videos that day.

Oh my god.

Jonathan Higgs: Yeah, we did all the whole album’s worth in one day, and there was a big storm that was coming into the Slate Mine, where we were. So that had a bit of a hard limit on it in terms of when we could be there. We were about to die, so that made it kind of fun.

Manchester is a modestly sized city in comparison to many other major cities in the world, yet some of the biggest and best bands of the last half-century have formed there. What do you think it is about Manchester that makes it such a hot-spot for artists?

Jonathan Higgs: It rains all the time. There’s lots and lots of venues that are good, and I think there’s good unis, so there’s good students starting bands, but there’s also this culture of music that’s already, what, forty years old, and I think people go there with the intention of being involved in music, whereas you wouldn’t get that in a lot of cities. I mean, I’m one of those people. I’m not really from Manchester, and I went there to start a band. I knew that was a place where bands could exist. It’s not like a fantastical idea that you might start a band, whereas there’s plenty of places you can go and no one will join your band. Manchester’s always been good for that. I think it self perpetuates really. Now we’ve got this culture and we’ve got this history. Then it generates more good bands.

You all have accomplished a ton in your Manchester is a modestly sized city in comparison to many other major cities in the world, yet some of the biggest and best bands of the last half-century have formed there. What do you think it is about Manchester that makes it such a hot-spot for artists?

Jonathan Higgins: It rains all the time. There’s lots and lots of venues that are good, and I think there’s good unis, so there’s good students starting bands, but there’s also this culture of music that’s already, what, forty years old, and I think people go there with the intention of being involved in music, whereas you wouldn’t get that in a lot of cities. I mean, I’m one of those people. I’m not really from Manchester, and I went there to start a band. I knew that was a place where bands could exist. It’s not like a fantastical idea that you might start a band, whereas there’s plenty of places you can go and no one will join your band. Manchester’s always been good for that. I think it self perpetuates really. Now we’ve got this culture and we’ve got this history. Then it generates more good bands.

You all have accomplished a ton in your tenure as a group. Is there anything you still hope to accomplish in your musical career?

Jonathan Higgs: Career? Oh yeah, definitely. We want a number one album. We want to headline Glastonbury Asbury, all the things that a band could ever want. I feel like we’ve achieved 1% of it, 8% of it. So yeah, you name it. I’d love to have a whole new chapter of the band.

[lo-fi-charming]

suddenly tormented with Thoughts about jon... im currently listening to someone else talk about how, when jon realized martin getting caught by prentiss was at least partially his fault, his way of dealing with his guilt was to become very diligent in doing what he could to keep martin safe. offers him the cot, starts trying to encourage everyone in the archives to be more careful in their investigating, bothers elias about safety measures, etc.

and i was just thinking that how this is about him feeling guilty, yeah, but i think it's also another way jon's childhood trauma manifests...? i feel like maybe it is, to some amount, projection?

the stuff with mr. spider and the web obviously influenced him a lot in terms of why he tends to get severely paranoid and questions others' motivations and his own agency in things. but in a more mundane way, i wonder if it also influenced how he reacts to not just his own 'helplessness', but others'? like, jon recognizes that martin was not given enough attention and consideration and care; jon texts him and takes prentiss' response as martin, accepts it at face value, but still... two weeks is a long time? no one even considered checking in on martin after barely hearing from him

i guess im trying to say is like... jon responds very immediately and intensely to this because he is attempting to do for martin what was not done for him. jon almost got eaten by a big, scary spider; his guardian, who up to then had been somewhat neglectful and/or dismissive of his needs, does not believe him about the incident. jon grows up feeling unsafe because the only person he really had around to protect him failed to make him feel like he could rely on her for help or support

imo this is a big thing with jon in general... his lack of a support system. up for debate on how much of that is his own 'fault' - he's not exactly a super sociable person, he's never been good at making friends, but- i dunno, being a bit abrasive doesn't mean you deserve to never have anyone to rely on. and he certainly didn't deserve to be ignored, resented, bullied, and hunted as a young child

but yeah... im thinking about how maybe a desire to offer support, even if it doesn't seem like he can really do much, is a very Jon Thing, and we see it very early, and it's just now occurring to me it might be tied to all this. how his fear was born and how it was cultivated by a lack of love and attention, how he was left to develop his own coping mechanisms, most of which (arguably) only exacerbated his problems in the long run... this is a personality trait we see in jon throughout the entire show's run, too - starts with martin, but we see how guilty and hurt he is over what happens with sasha, and then over time we see as he tries his best to become more trusting and open to others in an attempt to demonstrate his interest in their safety and offer his support

just think it's really like... both cute and charming but really sad and telling, that the first major glimpse we see of the 'real' jon behind his stuffy, skeptical facade is him recognizing that someone else has been neglected and nearly lost to something horrible, and his immediate response is to do as much as he can to verbalize belief in their experience, offer up what he can to help them feel safe, and do everything in his limited power to make sure they aren't harmed by the threat again