#obsessed with the 1900s tbh

[vacantgodling]

thank you @sergeantnarwhalwrites for tagging me to do this i looooove talking about myself PFF. i’ll leave this as an open tag for anyone else who wants to do it! tag me if u do i wanna hear ur responses 👀

about me

When did you first start writing?

i’ve been writing pretty much my entire life—making stories since i was like 3 with my grandmother and then transitioned to writing them down pretty soon after. i can’t think of a time in my life where i wasn’t story crafting tbh. but i think if you want a “traditional” start time, wherein i started writing anything that could resemble a Proper wip, then that was when i was 12 in 8th grade lol.

Are the genres/themes you enjoy reading different from the ones you write?

nah, they pretty much go hand in hand. i love reading gothic lit nowadays and a lot of my recent wips have sort of dove in that direction. in general, you can tell what was really intriguing me or what i was reading based on the wips i made at the time. vdtrt was super inspired when i was in my percy jackson era, purple haze (started) when i was into more comic/slapstick kid humor (like captain underpants or diary of a wimpy kid or that one journal book with the girl with the purple pen… i can’t remember what it’s called tho), but then transitioned into what it is now when i started getting more into romantic dramas. etc etc.

Is there an author (or just a fellow writer!) you want to emulate, or one to whom you're often compared?

not one that i’m often compared to, but the great gatsby did a number on me beginning to take prose and description seriously. that book is gorgeous to me (prose wise) and i really think between that and the goth/1700-1900s books that i’ve read really influenced me to put more emphasis on prose than on dialogue, tbh. i used to be a more snazzy, ya style writer—and while there’s nothing wrong with that per se it never sparked as much joy as me nailing an overly complex description does nowadays.

in terms of comparing myself or wanting to emulate someone specifically i don’t really. i think my friends are all amazing writers but i’m pretty self centered when it comes to my writing (both positive and negative connotations besides) so i tend to try and focus being the best version of myself and what i’m trying to write. this isn’t to say i don’t get jealous of how some of my friends write occasionally lol. i just don’t particularly want to be like them when the inner demons aren’t being shit, if that makes sense.

Can you tell me a little about your writing space(s)? (Room, coffee shop, desk, etc.)

tbh, a lot of times i write at work. i tend to finish my tasks early and no one tends to bother me so i kind of write to keep myself from falling asleep. i need silence and no distractions to write lol so its easier for me when im there. so its at my work desk and on my work laptop a lot of the time LMAO. when it’s not there i tend to write on my phone when im out and about or on the bus or whatever—same principles of wanting to be by myself and have no one bug me so i can think lol.

What's your most effective way to muster up some muse?

ngl, and this is gonna sound kinda bad, i kinda force myself to. lmao. like when i write at work esp i kinda just decide “what am i gonna work on today” and i sort of do it. it doesn’t always work mind you, like if i’m not in the mood or im tired or distracted or whatever then i’ll just end up doing something else.

when it comes to making new ideas i don’t force those, they just kinda come. i’m always thinking about stories and ideas tbh so it’s a matter of if i get obsessed with an idea enough to make it into an actual thing.

Did the place(s) you grew up in influence the people and places you write about?

nah with 2 caveats. purple haze specifically is a more fictional retelling (split between 2 mcs) of when i was 18-20 years old. lots of details changed but some of the main bits are shit that happened to me then that really fucked me up at the time that i wanted someplace to work through. as i’ve gotten older and healed from things, or taken to poetry to talk about stuff, emphasis on that wip has taken less precedent bc it doesn’t hurt me as much as it used to. secondly, the town braebrooke, where jenna lives in jenna the reaper is actually named after a street name that drivers always get lost going down near where i grew up. but i don’t tend to like to live in reality and real life. it sucks and it’s boring. stories have always been an escape for me so i don’t like to base things on real life if i can avoid it.

Are there any recurring themes in your writing, and if so, do they surprise you at all?

honestly i would say yes, i have recurring themes in my writing but no they don't really surprise me. i tend to write about things that are important to me and because i'm quite introspective i'm acutely aware of the things that i tend to gravitate towards. fucked up/complicated family dynamics where people care about each other (toxically in many ways) but express it horribly, queerness (as a whole, especially when it comes to the masculine), focus on the individual instead of the whole (in most cases) etc... it's all things i think about quite often. stories are just the vehicles to explore it.

my characters

Would you please tell me about your current favorite character?

because i have so many wips it should be "hard" to sit down and say that this (or these) are my favorite characters. but from every single wip i definitely have a brain rot character, and so from my "main wips" the brain rot characters are:

PARAMOUR (tfog) -> hyacinthus shrapnel, obviously. if i had to pick a favorite character of all my ocs its definitely him. he just DOES SOMETHING for me he is literally every obsession i have rolled up into one beautiful, piece of shit.

TCOL -> this one is more difficult because i have a few contendors bc the cast is ENORMOUS and still growing, but clear brightendale will always be my number one frfr. love of my life. my SON. i birthed him, and i'm obsessed with him. he would be followed closely and tied with lath, guardian of valor as well as MIZDARR in terms of other faves tbh.

VDTRT -> darren de leon, also somewhat obviously. he's my favorite guy. what a lad.

BTAF -> sjaak de witte. the first time i truly understood the appeal of a pathetic wet meow meow character archetype because he is all of that and i'm obsessed with him.

Which of your characters do you think you'd be friends with in real life?

conceptualizing being friends with my ocs is weird to me because i hate percieving myself, and i'm kinda weird about friendships. i think i would be actually genuine friends with either the friend group in vdtrt (consisting of: darren, olice, vlad, moonglend, gabe, demi, marco, and awilda) or the friend group in sixteen candles (consisting of: ranger, nanette, vani, roger, and tucker). but overall, i actually don't tend to make ocs with super similar interests to me a lot of the time and bc of the 'ism i have a hard time making friends?? so like take this with a grain of salt. i'd rather observe my ocs and play with them like dolls frfr.

Which of your characters would you dislike the most if you met them?

there are SEVERAL but if i go against the grain and i don't pick overt villainous characters (like tagetes, madja, silvano, etc)... probably the entire cast of btaf in some way or another tbh, like they just make decisions that while i (the creator) understand and think are fun in a "look at this shit" kind of way they would piss me off in a common sense kind of way. they are all dumb.

Tell me about the process of coming up with of one, all, or any of your characters.

characters kind of take a few basic routes for me. either: i like a preexisting character (or am fascinated by them cuz lbr i don't like twilight lmao) and i want to make 'my own version' in which i have control of them or i can amp up/explore other aspects of their personality with free reign bc they're mine now (ie: darren/percy jackson, sjaak/jacob from twilight, kirsi/magda from helix waltz, etc) OR i come up with a plot and i need a character to fill that plot so they start as a utility, then become their own character as i develop them more. (ie: jenna has a crush on someone in school, so i made chloe mathilders and now she has her own personality. the entirety of donut wip existed bc i wanted to make a horror wip and so they kind of came with the stereotypical horror archetypes; juls as the final girl etc).

it's actually not quite often that i have characters appear directly out of the aether for me to just have to deal with. jenna is honestly a rare exception to this because she is the ONE character i can think of who straight up manifested herself. i think that's why her power is manifestation bc she broke the grain of how i usually come up with ocs so. good on you girly lmao.

Do you notice any recurring themes/traits among your characters?

yeah, i definitely have character types i gravitate towards, especially when it comes to characters who are my faves-though i do try my best to make it so all of my characters feel like distinct people, even though i do have 'archetypes' that i fall into with them. off the top of my head i can think of:

beautiful asshole (always masculine) -> hya, toph, dove, ranger, aenlin

masc femmes/adjacent that should break my neck -> nyseah, beki, piper, erecia, azelie, almine

"healing" characters, aka has never done anything wrong in their life ever -> aloe, karenza, vani, iole

resourceful underdog -> kirsi, julissa, darren, dagmar, nevaeh, chidori, noh, n

god just help them -> sjaak, di, clear, quill, prosper, hue, graves

i could go on but yeah like most of my characters can fall into some kind of archetype of some kind

How do you picture them? (As real people you imagined, as models/actors who exist in real life, as imaginary artwork, as artwork you made or commissioned, anime style, etc)

honestly i don't have much of a visual imagination. the ocs that i can picture, i tend to draw out on my own characters so i picture them mostly in a more... stylized and what i wish i could draw version of my own art. otherwise i don't really picture them visually altogether. but this is mostly bc i can't visualize lmao.

my writing

What's your reason for writing?

i love stories, and i love story telling. there isn't really much beyond it. i've been doing it for so long, its literally just the fabric of who i am as a person. my literal first word was book lmao. like i just can't imagine existing without writing or storytelling in some form.

Is there a specific comment or type of comment you find particularly motivating coming from your readers?

honestly i'm greedy. i want to hear specific reactions and i love when people go into deep depth to react to what i've written and really take in every single detail and then kind of give me a play by play of how they felt and things they liked. it makes me want to write more to get that reaction <3

How do you want to be thought of by those who read your work? (For example: as a literary genius, or as a writer who "gets" the human condition; as a talented worldbuilder, as a role model, etc.)

um. idk if i want to be thought of in a particular way, but i guess i just want my stories to resonate with people. as long as they resonate and i can see how they do/the reaction people have to what i'm written then i'm happy. i think my stories should preceed me, if that makes sense. i don't necessarily need to be remembered for who i am but only for the stories i create. i guess?

What do you feel is your greatest strength as a writer?

prose and description

What have you been frequently told your greatest writing strength is by others?

pretty much the same thing. a lot of people tend to like my more poetic and winding prose which makes me happy lol. i've also been told i'm really good at depicting complex emotions.

How do you feel about your own writing? (Answer in whatever way you interpret this question.)

i love it, i think i'm talented asf. shame that the timeline and the state of the publishing industry won't let it be shown to more people but y'know. i would be lying if i said i didn't think that the only real talent i think i have is writing lol

If you were the last person on earth and knew your writing would never be read by another human, would you still write?

YUUUUUP. writing is for me first and everyone else second. i like sharing bc i like validation, but i would be so hype to just be able to create stories on my own with zero interruption. tbh in that scenario i would probably make up so many stories that i would just die eventually bc i forgot to care for myself.

When you write, are you influenced by what others might enjoy reading, or do you write purely what you enjoy? If it's a mix of the two, which holds the most influence?

if i wrote what others enjoyed, i would be publishable. i only write for my own interest.

[weirdthoughtsandideas]

Please rank the Astrid Lindgren stories

I'll only do a top 10 because this woman has written so many stories and is the closest we have to a secluded religion over here. So if I don't mention some, now you know.

1. Madicken

Mischievous badass little girl? I know we got Pippi but Madicken's life is tbh more appealing to me. She comes from a wealthy home, but their closest neighbours are poor, the husband is drunk and the wife is ready to sell her body to science to get some money. Their son is 14 but he's so big and cool (until he dresses up as a ghost and scares the shit out of you). Madicken's dad also refuses to be a normal upper class man, inviting their maid to the ball for example. The local mean girl who Madicken has a beef with turns out is very poor, and when she gives Madicken lice, Madicken's mom invites the girl and her sister, and cleans ALL of their hairs. They're anti child spanking in a story set in a time when hitting and spanking children was common. THEY HAVE THIS SCENE OF MADICKEN'S FAMILY TRYING TO HAVE A PICNIC AND END UP RUNNING FROM BULLS AND HAVING TO CLIMB UP TREES AND IT ALWAYS MAKES ME LAUGH. Madicken jumps from a roof with an umbrella just to see if she can fly. She's completely unhinged, yet so loveable. I also love her and her sister's relationship so much. Lisabet is also really funny.

2. The Children of Noisy Village

Just a slice of life story about children living in the countryside in early 1900s Sweden. Honestly great for a lot of historical fiction, showing how they lived back then, but also it's so cozy?? Just the kids, going through their everyday life, and causing chaos. It's april 1st, THE ENTIRE CLASS comes to the school at 6 AM to change the time, then go wake up the teacher (who DOES live in the school because this is Sweden in the countryside), and prank her. The same day, one of the boys tricks the other to go give a salesman a bunch of rocks, creating the most memeable quote "Sa du sten?!" that sweblr uses as a meme tag now. One of the kids is afraid to loose his baby teeth, so his neighbours SNEAK INTO HIS ROOM IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT AND DRAGS IT OUT WHILE HE SLEEPS. They have the coziest christmas where all the kids lie in a row on the floor and sleep. One of the kids accidentally fall into the water as they're ice skating, and it teaches kids what to do if this ever happens to someone! At one point everyone goes out in the forest to look for a mythical creature and one of the kids strips his clothes off and sits naked on a rock with a harmonica pretending to be him. The stuff these kids get up to, you wish you lived there with them! You wish you had the childhood they had!

Also the 1987 movie adaptation has every kid have a totally different accent and it's hilarious.

3. Pippi Longstocking

Was gonna put her lower but then I remembered how many times I watched "Pippi on the run" as a kid and changed my mind. But my sister was more obsessed with the actual show adaptation, I was more into the movies. Pippi is cool! However I remember sometimes getting second hand embarrassment when she didn't act the way you're supposed to in social situations. Especially when she got invited to the reception and dipped her head in the cake and kept messing everything up. Literally not the point about Pippi, like the point is that she breaks the rules and I am happy she's just herself and doesn't care for any norms, and yet I feel second hand embarrassment during those moments she's in other people's houses (or when she broke off a mannequin arm at the store). I don't know why! I do however appreciate that she's randomly magic, like making the most scary impressions (the dark man-voice in the tree still haunts me) and in the "on the run" movie she just goes biking without wheels and ends up FLYING ON A BROOMSTICK at the end (Pippi has been a witch all along!!!!!!!!!!)

4. Lotta on troublemaker street

Lotta is every single youngest sibling combined into one person. She's that one kid in the family that everyone has a story about. Although the thing I remember the most was when her brother decided to climb a cliff and ended up falling into the water. I was for some reason also obsessed with the fact that her sister's full name was Mia-Maria. Her dad is also one of the best dads in all of Astrid Lindgren tbh. Lotta I think is just how it feels being the youngest of the family and not really being allowed the same things as your siblings because you're too young, and it's not fair! And so you revolt, and runaway to the neighbour lady who is more than happy to play with you. You wanna ride a bike like your siblings so you STEAL AN ADULT BIKE and ride down the street. It feels like the whole world is against you, but you're also literally five years old. And because of your 5 year old willpower, you also manage to save christmas and get a christmas tree for your family.

5. Ronja the Robber's Daughter

I honestly didn't find this as appealing as a kid, I remember thinking the movie adaptation was WAY TOO LONG (and it was, it was over 2 hours), but I've grown to appreciate it way more. Especially since the new adaptation they released on Netflix. Also it has one of the catchiest themes, like I hum that robber's song every day. I love just seeing her play in the forest, I love her and Birk's banters... the creatures in the forest will forever scare me but goddamn those butt gnomes... everyone quotes them and we immediately know. Although tbh I've never been a fantasy kid, it could be why I wasn't as into this.

6. Seacrow island

Honestly?? I found it quite boring before Skrållan was born. Weird, huh? Thought it got better because they added a baby. It could however have to do with the final movie being one I watched a lot. I do appreciate the full series a lot more now than when I was a kid. I love the islands, I love the children's shenanigans. Still is so messed up how Westerman just gaslit Stina into thinking she sold Skrållan to him, when in reality he just made her get a cocoa ball as he returned Skrållan to her mom. I felt so bad for Stina??? SHE'S LIKE 7 YEARS OLD SHE JUST WANTED A COCOA BALL, AND SHE JUST WANTED TO BABYSIT THE ONLY BABY ON THE ISLAND SO SHE COULD FEEL BIG FOR ONCE. Also always got me so nervous when they snuck into Westerman's house to retrieve his gun so that he wouldn't shoot a fox. I also wish Teddy and Freddy were more developed, it felt like they just stopped caring about them, but they were interesting.

7. Karlsson on the roof

This is ONLY because of the cartoon version. I hated the live action version as a kid and I felt SO BAD for Svante because Karlsson kept messing his life up ALL THE TIME. And then everyone blamed him because no one believed Karlsson existed. But it was slightly better in the cartoon, I think. I also remember quite liking the books, and I remember distinctly how I watched a play in Stockholm where BENJAMIN INGROSSO played Svante. Yeah, I've seen Benjamin Ingrosso when he was a literal CHILD playing on stage and that's how I'll remember him.

8. Emil in Lönneberga

It's mostly for the songs from the adaptation? Because I could never enjoy anything properly due to being so scared of Emil's dad. But the songs are such bangers. Also I have appreciated it so much more now when I'm grown than when I was a kid.

9. Mio my Mio

I remember my parents insisting on reading this to me when I was a kid and I didn't want them to, so I pretended to dislike the story. But tbh, I was kinda into it. I hate his foster parents so much, though?? Like imagine adopting a kid and being like "yeah we dislike you because you're not a girl like we wanted to adopt". Also, the theme song for the adaptation slaps, even though the adaptation is kind of... meh.

10. Brother's Lionheart

I remember as a kid not getting why everyone loved this, because I was like "I don't get it, I find it boring idk" (kid me really didn't pay attention when I watched the movie adaptation), but as I'm older... woah. Astrid Lindgren said "the two main characters, both minors, DIE in the first chapter. You're welcome". I really understand why this book caused such a controversy, ESPECIALLY due to the way it ends????? Also it got the iconic quote "All makt åt Tengil vår befriare".

[mothmage]

Only now saw your pinned post and I NEED YOU TO RECOMMEND ME FIVE BOOKS RIGHT NOW 🤯💖😎🖤

oh my god what kind of books??!! genre??!! my top five favorite fiction books (i think VC fans would like most or all of these, actually):

Carmilla - Sheridan le Fanu (short, lesbian vampire, Dracula's blueprint, we all know this one) (this doesn't count as one of the five, but it's obligatory)

Perfume, the Story of a Murderer - Patrick Süskind (descriptive and evocative writing, weird and gross, guy with the most sensitive nose in the world, this WILL change the way you think about smell and scent, also murder, i first read this years ago and genuinely still think about it once a week)

Sing, Unburied, Sing - Jesmyn Ward (new southern gothic, ghost story but the ghost may or may not even be real, the horror is the intergenerational trauma, the prison industrial complex, and race in the american south - Ward is reinventing the genre right now, and i'm following every new release like a dog at her heels)

The White Castle - Orhan Pamuk (17th c science and understanding of the world, huge huge intrigue about identity and personhood and individuality, who am i and who are you and who are we type questions -- this one did send me into a psychosis episode the last time i read it, but would still 10/10 recommend if you arent me)

Nightbitch - Rachel Yoder (descriptive in kind of a gross way that im obsessed with. reality-unreality is a little blurry, but this is like...gnawing chewing going feral except it's kind of literal for the main character. good for her except it's not in a toxic feminism way it's in a really weird way. good for her. bark)

This is How You Lose the Time War - Max Gladstone and Amal El-Mohtar (tbh still not sure what this one is about, something something dystopian future time machine battle, it doesn't even matter. this is the most romantic love story i've ever read, and the writing is like. this rewrote my brain. epistolary so it's all in letters. it's so confusing but if you accept that the relationship is the whole point and the actual war is the background, it's like...breathtaking)

ok this is actually six seven, but also Gods of Tango - Carolina de Robertis (ambiguously butch/transmasc/transman main character, but this is about MUSIC. italian violinist in early 1900s argentina. some crazy messed up relationships. music!!! music!!! this is the most "music above all else" character i've ever read in my life)

[revvethasmythh]

tagged by @utilitycaster!

last song listened to: If I Had A Heart by Fever Ray. Very moody, very cool song off my durge playlist

currently reading: A Far Wilder Magic by Allison Saft. Was wary but hopeful going into this because I have little to no luck with any books labeled as "romantasy." I'm about halfway through and thoroughly relieved to be enjoying it a lot! Solid worldbuilding in fantasy world just left of irl early 1900s, great characters, and an interesting magic system. Tbh WAY more than I was expecting going into it and I've got another of her books lined up to read after

currently watching: numerous things, but mostly making my way back through c2. with a couple of friends, we're currently watching 911 Lone Star (for the second time, for one of my friends who didn't catch all the episodes), and with another friend we're rewatching Charmed, which I haven't seen since I was like. ten. Watching it back has been a wild ride, let me tell you.

(We are also watching reality tv show Farmer Wants A Wife--the American version--and we put it on initially as a joke, but it was surprisingly good? Honestly the least offensive piece of reality television media I've ever seen? It was a pleasant surprise and we're watching it week to week now after CR on Thursdays)

currently obsessed with: I was given a very pretty, very satisfying mechanical keyboard as condolence gift for the sudden and untimely death of my beloved laptop (may her memory be a blessing), and honestly it's pretty fantastic. I think I'm writing more now just for the joy of clicking the keys.

Also rather obsessed with the aggressive horse girl energy that is happening on the top of my desk rn (they were Christmas gifts. My mom and I visited a bona fide toy shop in early December and she saw me experience ~whimsy~ at seeing the Breyer holiday collection so now they, and also that clear unicorn ornament, have a permanent place on the top of my desk)

tagging: @mapleandgingeroatmeal, @tin-cant, @undead-knick-knack

[thegreenshota]

Godddd, your mono sprites are so beautiful, I've been imagining them as humans and what their talents would be.

Hear me out;

Canonly the monokubz are 100 years in the future so I reversed it (since I'm reversing them to humans) to consider talents for 100 years in the past.

Monophanie: Ultimate Engineer

Monokid: Ultimate Swing Musician

Monodam: Ultimate Clockworker

Monosuke: Ultimate Filmmaker/Director

Monotaro: Ultimate Samurai

Nanokuma: Ultimate Telephone Operator

And bonus of

Kurokuma: Ultimate Tutor

Shirokuma: Ultimate Graverobber

Tbh a decent amount of thought went into them. I was thinking about talents that weren't in canon, matched the time period, weren't common or cliche, and fit the appearance you drew them as.

Monophanie was the most difficult so I wanted to make it fairly vague. Engineer could mean a lot of things, and in the game, she did technically engineer another robot (But we don't need to talk about the details of that).

Monokid is a rocker, but rock didn't exist during that time. It was between swing and ragtime, and swing had more of that beat that matched him.

Monodam always speaks very strict and robotic, and his ears reminded me of inventor goggles (Like Miu wears) so I wanted to give him a talent that involved building but one that fit his "like clockwork" personality.

Monosuke is very money obsessed and controlling, perfectly fit for the role of a film maker for the starting up movie industry. I almost wanted to give him a talent of nobility, but found it was too similar to Sonia, and being rich wasn't a talent.

Monotaro should be pretty obvious, but I did some research to confirm when the last samurai passed away, which was in the mid 1900s, so it wasn't unreasonable for there to still be samurai.

I wanted to keep Nanokuma's technology driven look and role in canon, and he's literally wearing a headset, so I double-checked, and being a telephone operator was a booming business, perfect for Nanokuma.

Shiro and Kuro were a bit tricky. I wanted Kuro to have a criminalist talent, but Yakuza was taken, and gangster was too similar and too cliche. Although it was incredibly tempting, I decided to settle for graverobbing, which is often done to sell goods and make money, which could still be funneled into the black market, but wouldn't be within a talent title directly.

Shiro was mostly because of his role in UDG, a guide, teacher, and protector for the adults. He likes helping people, and a tutor is a helping talent that gives the impression of a well-rounded personality and intelligence for many topics.

Lemmie know what you think, I was really just playing around with the idea

uwaaaa thanks! qwq about this au at first the idea seemed incomprehensible to me, but the more I read, the more it seemed to me that this was actually an interesting idea but about some talents I would argue for example - monosuke's talent I think might fit better banker! about monophanie i think might be ikebana artist

[sepublic]

            So I’m rather wary of the military, as I’ve brought up before. But at the same time, Transformers’ constant crossovers with G.I. Joe inevitably has me a bit curious, especially since I remember watching the live-action films as a kid, and having some exposure to the Sigma 6 cartoon as well as the Destro figure from there.

         And I’m a sucker for shared universes, I’ll admit; So a part of me is entertaining the idea of G.I. Joe being canon in the Nizziverse… Purely as a side story, I’d insist! But then I thought, what if instead of regular human soldiers who help the Autobots infiltrate Chicago and fight the Decepticons in Dark of the Moon… What if it’s G.I. Joe? People understandably groused about human characters stealing too much of the spotlight, but if it’s corny classics fans actually have history with like the Joes, it’d feel a lot more bearable imo.

         (Tbh, I wonder if there’s an advantage to merging the two franchises; The name recognition of classic Joe characters being adapted to function as the human cast could easily make those parts of the film automatically intriguing to viewers, instead of garnering wary apprehension.)

         This also reminds me of when the Bumblee Movie came out, because in the initial hype following its release, I had ideas for subsequent Knightverse films (as I often do, look what I wrote for the Venom franchise), and one of them involved Starscream as the main antagonist. Long story short, he works with human organizations on Earth, giving them advanced Cybertronian vehicle designs so they can take over the planet for him. With this alliance, Starscream and his human minions allies will use their control of Earth to manufacture a whole army and source of Energon for him to take over the Decepticons.

         Part of my Doylist reasoning was because as mentioned before, I feel a bit bad for Cybertronian alt-modes and how overlooked they are, so I wanted to treat them as something special, with their own potential history, in their own right. Ultimately, this idea has largely fallen through… Except!

         In the Nizziverse, Autobots and Decepticons did land on Earth sometime in the early to mid-1900s, not counting Megatron and the Allspark of course. And they’ve been scouting out our planet for a while, getting into their own covert conflicts and skirmishes with one another, interacting with members of the human populace discreetly, often hiding their true identities in the process, but not always. This is part of the premise for the Bumblee Movie’s place in the Nizziverse after all, and true to the original Bayverse source material as well.

         They don’t make their ‘official’ reveal until the first film, or technically Revenge of the Fallen. But there’s a lot of room for prequel fodder, so given all I mentioned above, I was wondering if I could mash them together and salvage these old and new concepts alike?

         Imagine. It’s during the Cold War, or something like that. Starscream and his fellow Decepticon scouts have been looking through Earth for a bit, and as I brought up before, Starscream sees an opportunity to convert this planet into his own asset against the Decepticon leadership, under the guise of an alliance that will help ‘protect’ humanity. Not that he’s exactly against the idea either, Starscream isn’t particularly intrigued in Decepticon ideology and just wants power for himself. So there isn’t that same obsession to preserve Cybertron at any costs, nor that particular disdain towards organics for getting in the way of that (though he’s still a dismissive jerk towards them).

         Starscream recruits Swindle as part of his scheme behind the Earth Decepticons’ back, allies himself with some generic military organization and provides them designs for advanced Cybertronian vehicles. Starscream withholds the secret of making Energon, forcing the humans to rely on him to power these war machines. So now you’ve got things like Tetra Jets being manufactured by humans, under Starscream’s oversight. All the while, he fantasizes about immersing himself into the local culture so he can be hailed as a hero and leader by the humans.

         Our Autobot protagonists catch wind of this, antics ensue, big investigation. This might actually connect to Dark of the Moon’s plot, as I’ve since reevaluated my stance on its timeline retcons as actually fitting fairly decently into what I’ve established regarding Transformers having been here a while (mentioned in the first film), albeit with a couple changes here or there. Starscream being in charge of this hidden knowledge would certainly explain why he didn’t immediately bring it up to Megatron…

         Anyhow, big climax ensues, all of the Cybertronian vehicles, piloted by humans and incapable of transforming, are destroyed. Starscream is sent on the retreat with Skywarp and Thundercracker now fully aware of his attempted treachery and after his ass. End scene, the Autobots just prevented World War III, and discreetly no less! Sector 7 (which is a more international organization akin to the SCP foundation in Nizziverse) doesn’t even have much of a clue.

         …Except! One of the masked, faceless goons from the military organization survives. And contrary to what everyone thought, he actually succeeded in making copies of the Cybertronian schematics, which the Autobots had destroyed. In the ashes of this destruction, everyone just sort of ignored and forgot about the human survivors, and this lone grunt vowed he would make use of this alien knowledge to his own benefit…

         Of course, he needs someone with actual resources and the technical know-how to reimplement these designs for him. He contacts James McCullen of M.A.R.S industries for the job, and eventually crowns himself as the ruler of a new organization, the dreaded Cobra Commander!

         So yeah. The classic HISS tank design from Cobra? It’s actually alien in origin. Probably Cybertronian, but given what I discussed a while back, potentially from another world that the Transformers pillaged. Either way, it’s not of this world, though it HAS been watered down for the Cobra edition… This is because Cobra doesn’t have the same guidance and resources that Starscream provided, so they had to make their versions of the Cybertronian vehicles a lot more fuel-efficient, cheaper, smaller, easier to make. Basically a knock-off Earth version, but still pretty powerful by human standards of that time!

         (I like to think the vehicle the HISS tank was modeled after was Brawl’s Cybertronian alt-mode, prior to landing on Earth.)

         The connection and origin in Transformers is, in a way, a totally optional yet fun backstory for Cobra in G.I. Joe. It’s not necessary and isn’t brought up in the ‘main storyline’, but it does enrich the lore if you’re interested. I imagine this hypothetical Nizziverse G.I. Joe story remains fairly divorced and oblivious to its Transformers connection, with only Cobra Commander and Destro aware. In the end, Cobra is defeated and Cobra Commander goes into hiding, fading into obscurity as your local criminal Old Snake, like in the original Transformers cartoon.

         (I think there’s some very meta humor that Starscream and Cobra Commander both had the same VA and similar voices, and Cobra Commander was basically what would happen if Starscream was in charge of the villains. So having Starscream play such a role in Cobra Commander’s rise to power, not that he ever realizes it, is funny. It’s like the Commander chose to emulate himself after this dude in a twisted, envious admiration… His and Cobra’s coloration even matches?!?!)

         The Transformers themselves aren’t totally involved in human affairs, it IS a big planet and their scouts are very few in number by comparison. So they remain totally oblivious to the hidden aftermath of Starscream’s failed plot. But by Dark of the Moon, G.I. Joe, recognizing some of the alt-modes the Decepticons assume when invading Earth, volunteer to help the Autobots infiltrate Chicago.

         With their own experience and superhero-level skills, the G.I. Joe veterans help the Autobots succeed, possibly recruiting Lennox and Epps (or at least working with them) and yadda-yadda, the elaborate cameo is over. I’ll be honest, I was only interested in G.I. Joe through Transformers and learning Skywarp became a Real American Hero in the comics, but! It’s got its charm. So I’m enjoying this idea of the Nizziverse G.I. Joe actually being a stealth sequel to Starscream’s Cold War antics, and all of it coming full-circle after Cobra has been defeated, via the very source of those advanced schematics that started it all…

        Of course, who’s to say G.I. Joe ever makes the full connection and calls Starscream out on it? He might die in Chicago, only to be brought back because it’s tradition for this Seeker to cheat death. Having Starscream, who shares Cobra Commander’s voice and even personality to an extent, be the Man behind the Man? Kind of supremely funny if you think about it. He’s Cobra Commander Plus for the Joes’ final battle. Not counting Serpentor. Cobra Commander in turn was the unwitting legacy Starscream left, having taken a human form for him with appropriate resemblances...

       I wonder how Old Snake feels when he sees news of the Decepticon invasion, sees the very aliens who gave him this power, emerge and be taken down, all without his involvement? Did he want to take over the world partly to defend against these invaders? Does he feel resentment at not being included given how much he did with the Cybertronians’ technology? Cheated of some major destiny? Ignored despite his entire world having revolved around these robots? Eager to help an upstart criminal carry out his revenge on Transformers later on? Who knows!

       Again, this connection is ultimately a side-material recontextualization, that while it adds to the lore, isn’t required nor is it the focus or even brought up in the ‘main’ story, with its own divorced background the main story presents being sufficient on its own.

[tianshiisdead]

Tag Game To Better Know You! Send this to people you’d like to know better!

thank uu @astrophilic-soul ilu!!

What book are you currently reading?

Bouncing in between 'Beyond Suffering: Recounting War in Modern China', 'Britain and China: 1840-1970 Empire Finance and War', and 'An Epitome of the Reports of the Medical Officers to the Chinese Imperial Maritime Customs Service from 1871-1882' rn! First two are history books, second is a primary source recovered from 1884, they are about exactly what the titles say and so far all are very good and enjoyable <3 tho Britain and China has some... Interesting points sometimes (each chapter is by a diff author tbf)

What’s your favorite movie you saw in theatres this year?

Haven't been to the theatre that I can think of lol

What do you usually wear?

All sorts of things loll but almost never pants u.u my 2 fav types are (generally) long flowing dresses and short little skirts/dresses with cropped sweaters! But I also like hanfu and hanyuansu too, and I have some jp/cn street fashion that I wear out, and some weird fits from Taobao. basically, I'll wear anything I find cute whether its fashionable or weird and I do get lots of comments, good ones and sometimes weird ones too LOL

How tall are you?

165 cm uwu

What’s your Star Sign? Do you share a birthday with a celebrity or a historical event?

Aries! Apparently Ireland became a republic on this day which is pretty cool

Do you go by your name or a nick-name?

What's considered a nickname? I go by my English name which is kind of a nickname in that it's not really my name to me, but I also go by a 小名 at home, and 'Tia' online, so I suppose usually a nickname.

Did you grow up to become what you wanted to be when you were a child?

I wanted to be an assassin. I won't elaborate anymore tho : )

Are you in a relationship? If not, who is your crush if you have one?

@peoniibud is my darling

What’s something you’re good at vs. something you’re bad at?

I'm good at lots of things. I'm bad at being humble

Dogs or cats?

Cats!

What’s something you would like to create content for?

Everything I like. I make almost nothing bc school is sooo busy and I'm soooo bad with procrastination :'))) but if I had to say I wish I could make Babel (R.F. Kuang) content, it's a newer interest and I'm sad I got into it right when I was too busy to make anything

If you draw/write, or create in any way, what’s your favourite picture/favourite line/favourite etc. from something you created this year?

I haven't made all that much this year tbh? It's not really a line but I realize I've repeated in several fics some sort of mention about how when Arthur gets truly started (talking) he'll never stop bc he kind of loves the sound of his own voice even though he'll never admit it, and I enjoy that, it makes me giggle fjkldgh I think Arthur having that dash off irritating arrogance is rlly the whipped cream on top of the pie. paired with how he's kind of plain and dislikes showing softness or weakness even while troubled (stiff upper lip... but also sometimes tsundere) and is kind of defensive and you can sort of see an old inferiority complex peek through even with all of his *everything* esp during the centuries past, ugh I could go on I genuinely love that character so much What’s something you’re currently obsessed with?

fandom wise: Babel by R F Kuang

Otherwise: the building of informal empire in China 1800s-mid 1900s and its lasting effects... I've always liked history and Chinese history in particular but the search for the seeds of modern national identity through post Opium War history is surprisingly difficult and has consumed me

What’s something you were excited about that turned out to be disappointing this year?

School... I hoped to be on top of things but my Mental Health (tm) and physical health took over again : ( I resent being so weak tbh I want to be energetic but instead I'm just trapped here constantly sick and easily feverish and barely able to function. It really hurts.

What’s a hidden talent of yours?

Uhhh I don't think I hide any talents? I don't do many things outside of what I know ig. I'm classically trained in ballet, piano, violin, and flute, and can read basic Manchu, so I guess those are hidden. I also have hidden british etiquette knowledge that I never use bc my mom's mentor at work (shes a scientist) was an old Scottish gentleman and I went to his house a lot to play with his granddaughter and learned how to properly act and eat the old British dude way ig dunno if thats a talent tho

Are you religious?    

Not... actively, my parents don't practice so I never had much, and I was raised pretty nonreligiously. But I make sure I'm eating only Halal food and follow the same habits my mom (hui Muslim) follows and my grandparents are very devout so I guess it's like... someday I'll come home (to Islam) but I don't know when that will be... I guess. It's something personal I guess.

What’s something you wish to have at this moment?

(quoted from @/astrophilic-soul bc sooo tru) The ability to not procrastinate

Tags:

@peoniibud @m3hwhateverworks @irithnova @lightpinkstuff @erubento @irithnova @stormsfolloweagle and anyone else who sees this etc!

[unagrancantidaddepanes]

I am obsessed with the tags you added to my Snufmin babies, and I would be delighted to let you know that Dove’s dress is in fact a hand me down from Moominmamma that Snorkmaiden helped alter to fit her better 💕 most of the kiddie’s clothes are either hand me downs or handmade by other people (also I did take some cues from Anne of Green Gables; SO dreamy)

AAAA THATS SO LOVELY !!!!! also oughhh i love how u thought about historical styles in this OUGHH 💕 i love when elderly people or children wear a bit old fashioned clothing because of how they were raised or from hand me downs,,,, its such a nice detail when people choose to add it in stuff, also ANNE OF GREEN GABLES GAHHH tbh i cant believe i actually guessed the influence 😭❤️ thats crazy omg, anyways i just love fashion history sm auauauau im hoping to learn to hand make dresses so that i can make dress designs from the 50s GAHHH tbh i love fem fashion all the way back from like the early 1800s up to like the 1970s (i know thats a MASSIVE timeline but i gen love all the different styles from like all of it 😭) do u have a favourite period of time for historical fashion ??? if i had to pick from that massive timeline lol id say the 1950s, then the early 1900s as a close second ❤️ im generally referring to european and US fashion btw, but im really interested in fashion history of other parts of the world too !!! its just unfortunately a lot harder to find resources for a lot of other places </33

[fdrsamericanflagduckfloaty]

Hey if I can

*why* do you have an obsession with TR

,,,tbh

don't know

like at all

i... i think it- okay you didn't ask for a timeline, but in november, i wanted to read the trilogy. i don't know why, it just seemed interesting. i was challenged to read all 1900+ pages in a month and i did, and i guess all of that in a month was the start? admittedly i was interested in him before but it was just an eh thing. i don't really know entirely though- it's just something i've decided to say 'fuck it' to and indulge. besides, i'll be able to look back on it... finely, not nicely but finely, and it's nice to learn.

and my taste in men is also severely broken lol like- im dead serious when i say i have probably... ... 200+ saved images. of. of him. and- that's- well- not a lot- but- also? sort of???? but uh- yeah that also could help in contributing.

but yeah no short answer is i don't know.

[pogbur]

thanks so much for tagging me!!

the last song i listened to: The U & I in Suicide by That Handsome Devil (but I also have The Communists Have the Music by They Might Be Giants stuck in my head)

favourite color: Indigo is the main but there’s a few

currently watching: House (like the doctor show) and Camp Camp. On YouTube mostly schlatt as of late tbh, and video essays ofc

spicy/savoury/sweet: sweet but honestly anything but spicy I have the spice intolerance of a British person from the 1900’s

relationship status: singlular 🤓 (both unfortunately and thankfully. ‘tis bitchless but I could NOT handle a relationship rn. esp a first relationship oh god)

current obsession: as said before house and and camp camp but also my knockoff benchtrio new ocs!

No pressure tags: @tshemea @wild-raven-and-crow @emi-writings @its-arson-time @thinkingabout-girls @possuminnit and anyone else who wants too!!

nine people i'd like to get to know better

Thanks for the tag, Jenna (@fireplceashes 💜)

the last song i listened to: The Portrait by James Horner (I was feeling romantic at 1am)

favourite colour: Any shade of purple

currently watching: Death Parade and Naruto (because I'm almost forced to by my bro)

spicy/savoury/sweet: Sweet

relationship status: Single

current obsession: Other than annoying my brother since he's home on break? Playing Persona 3 Reload and reading poetry (Dorothy Parker kills me)

No pressure tags: @moderatelyluckypenny, @theannoyeddragon82, @elpantalones, @steviescrystals, @blankinsidecards, @coffeeisaritual, @nooneisstraight, @hellengomes, @violetscrypt

[a-jumped-up-pantry-boy]

The Secret Stealer

Trees took graceful waltzing steps and swayed their leaves as the breeze hummed a secret tune, while striped and spotted dresses lackadaisically bobbed from one side of the street, which was coloured only in varying shades of brown, to the other, much like ducks on water - only without any purpose. They brought a much needed shock of colour to the otherwise miserable location, although many would insist that the plain street was charming, rather than personalityless. Inside the whimsical tea-shop, the interior of which was far more resplendent, and generally more pleasant, than the exterior, teacups danced between their owners’ hands and the saucers they paired with, creating an orchestra of clinking crockery, delicate spoons tapping against the sides of cups as the beat, and the main melody being the hums of appreciation from the grateful customers as they sipped their drinks. 

“Thank you, sir, but I’m rather sure this topic is just far too complex for a woman to understand, no matter how competent you are at explaining it. Might I propose moving onto an alternate field of conversation, instead?” An asinine creature giggled and twirled a lock of honey coloured hair around a perfectly manicured finger she spoke, leaning across the table under the guise of reaching for the sugar pot to send a simpering smile at the way of her companion. 

“Of course, Miss Alward. I understand completely; this topic is very complicated and you’ve far too much to think about without me trying to make you ponder something much too difficult for your brain. I imagine all your time is spent choosing new dresses, yes?” Her companion spoke considerably louder than she did, his arrogant tone attracting glances from many people at other tables. 

“Well, what other activities would I be partaking in?” The young woman readjusted her skirt, flashing her ankle at the man who sat across from her for only a second, and giggled, a light sound that could come only from a head filled completely with air, glancing at him to make sure he took notice of her guilty show of ankle, looking satisfied when he continued to stare down at her feet. Drawing small circles with her left hand on a small piece of paper covered in patterns, she used her right to stir her tea as she continued to smile at him, seeming to have no aim other than to win a touch of her hand or a predatory leer disguised as an adoring smile from him. “The weather is very pleasant at the moment. I imagine your mother has been having many garden parties at the moment?” She continued to glance up at him from under her eyelashes every few seconds while he spoke. 

“Unfortunately not. She’s been rather sick recently, and has been confined to the house, but she’s sorely missing all her parties.”

“Perhaps I could pay her a visit soon, to lighten her spirits?” He nodded and smiled at her again, as if she'd said something particularly endearing, and began talking extensively at the poor girl, making the mistake of assuming she held any interest in the least important aspects of both his and his mother's lives, simply because she'd made a polite inquiry, and incorrectly presuming her vacant smile, which was actually just covering her wandering imagination as she completely ignored every word the verbose man threw at her, was a sign of deep interest. As he began to talk about his third butler’s recent antipathy to the ducks in his lake, she felt overcome by a deep lassitude and began nodding in time to his lilting speech, contemplating how long it would take her to drift asleep that evening if he sat beside her bed later, still talking, and she observed the shambolic tweed jackets that contained women heaving stacks of books along the street, leaning against Picasso painted parlours and shooting sardonic smiles at the candy coloured dresses who stared with horror at their hair, clothes and literacy that they displayed with shocking confidence. Soon his stream of conversation, although really it was like a vicious river that never ended, moved onto a new topic, and she repressed a sigh, wishing she was imprisoned anywhere but that tea-shop. 

A dress, made of light fabric where blues mingled in with browns, wandered along pathways that would be impossible to navigate, had the wearer not basically grown up in those woods, whilst the girl trapped inside it fiddled with her gloves and parasol as she wandered, staring at the sky and trees. Eventually she strolled into a clearing, flinging her arms open wide, dramatically greeting the other girls who resided there, hanging from trees and perched on rocks. The only woman there who was older than 25 made her way towards Clarissa, while a girl followed from behind her, shooting a grin towards her friend. 

“Why, pray tell, does your dress have the contents of a teacup over it?” The woman asked, her eyes running over the stained dress a few times before she stepped forward and began scrubbing it with a handkerchief that seemed to have appeared out of nowhere. 

“Mr. Lowood was the most tedious character I’ve ever had the misfortune of meeting, and I had to spill my drink over me just so I could escape his company. Oh, Anne, why did you send me there?” Clarissa cried, stepping back from Anne’s rough hand and gently scrubbing at the dress herself, scowling at the persistent stain. 

“Away with the dramatics, for Goodness’ sake. I’m hoping you found out something useful before you decided to jump ship?” Anne just gave the girl a disapproving look as she began to dance around the clearing while humming, then singing her message.

“His mother is sick, so I shall pay her a visit soon, and hopefully in her delirious state she’ll accidentally give us some information. And his butler, the third one, hates their geese and ducks, so perhaps if we threaten him with some aquatic birds he’ll-” 

“Any other helpful information?” Anne’s question was greeted simply with a fast shake of Clarissa’s head and a disgruntled look at being cut off before she could finish her duck-based proposal. “Then I suggest Miss Reid accompanies you to change out of your dress,” she finished, then glanced at Clarissa once more and swept off to go and discuss matters, most of which were secret, with one of the other young women. 

“This role is insufferable!” Clarissa muttered, stalking through the trees until she reached a sheltered spot, stopping underneath and struggling with the fastenings on her dress. “Whenever I gather secrets, I’m treated as nothing more than another silly little creature they can exploit and then abandon. Of course, I’m not, but it’s demeaning to have to pretend to be dim just so that I’m considered pleasant company.” She finally undid the buttons and pulled off her dress, glaring at it as it sank to the muddy floor in a depressive heap of heavily starched fabrics as if it was the sole reason she was forced into something that made her so unhappy, immediately stepping into another with no care for its delicacy, only being more careful with it after she heard snapping threads. 

“Surely you realise what you do is important? Without you, I doubt we’d be able to...persuade men to do what we want. A business of secrets is barren and useless if there’s not a soul collecting the secrets. What did you discover today, at tea?” Catherine calmed Clarissa’s intense fury almost immediately, her soft breeze, which matched the soft ringlets that framed her face and light colours she always wore, putting out the fires Clarissa’s tenacious temper wouldn’t fail to set alight. 

“At the expense of my happiness, peace and feeling of any emotion other than eternal boredom, I collected a few secrets. Nothing on their own, of course, but paired with the facts I’m sure I’ll discover during my meeting with Mr Lowood’s mother, there’s not a single situation I can imagine in which we fail. I don’t want to dwell on the possibility that we might fail; this is an important mission, even I understand that, for all Anne doesn’t trust me, and there’s an awful lot that seems to be resting on my shoulders. Mr Lowood seems about as harmful as a spaniel, but I’m sure his acquaintances could damage us if they saw fit, which they would if we threatened him. Truly, there’s no room for error.” Clarissa had by now fasted her dress and was pacing around the clearing, gesticulating wildly, while Catherine sat on the edge of a rock, smiling slightly. 

“I’m certain nothing will go wrong; you’ve prepared for this mission for so long now, you have a plan for every possible error. And besides, Anne trusts you, you know she’s awfully fond of you, and she doesn’t trust many people. You’re truly a special creature if she has faith in you. However, she has nothing but stern feelings towards me, that must be why I’m still only allowed to sort through correspondences, the most tedious task of them all! But, tell me more about Mr Lowood’s misdemeanours,” Catherine answered, more eager about Mr Lowood than she had been about any of Clarissa’s previous cases, although she was sure that was just because she’d complained more about him than anyone else, and so of course her friend would be more intrigued by him. As she quietly uttered the secrets, careful nobody else could hear, she began tugging on her gloves, which seemed to be bound to her skin, mindful of the delicate spot by her thumb where a hole had broken the last time they had an argument, and which had been shabbily mended just after they made peace with each other. After Clarissa had finished discussing the “insufferable, eternally mundane Mr Lowood'' with Catherine, her friend suddenly dashed off, and she was left standing in the woods alone. 

Rain, laced with knives shot down, soaking Clarissa to the skin as she ambled away, alone. 

The secrecy was difficult for the women of the society to live under, as the pressure often suffocated them, which wasn’t unexpected, as they were forced to leave the entirety of their lives behind to become someone new and help the movement. This secrecy, a burden that all of them carried, flowed through their veins constantly, becoming a part of them, until it was difficult for even them to be able to tell the difference between the lies in their lives and the parts that were true. This secrecy had broken families as easily as dried leaves, their cracks on display to everyone else in their circle to observe, for as good as these women were at hiding, they could hardly hide from people who were as good at lying as them. This secrecy had caused women to pull away from their families completely because of the lies which comprised them so entirely, they were nothing but a series of stories.

Anne sat in a different clearing to the one all the younger women congregated in, bathing in the melody of the river tumbling over the rocks that inhabited it, thanking the stars that were just emerging that she didn’t have to assimilate any more information about the most fashionable style of dress, or listen to anymore mindless chatter that the girls pertinaciously assured her wasn’t utterly inane. Clarissa stumbled into the clearing, soaking wet. 

“Why is it that I play this role, rather than someone else?” Clarissa’s voice was soft, not with anger - her anger was blazing and impossible to miss, it scorched the Earth and nothing was left untouched - but with confusion. Her hair, wild after sprinting through the trees in the way she so loved, curled around her face, not framing it as a beautifully decorated picture frame would a masterpiece, but surrounding her face as a cloud of smoke would an explosion. 

“Many of the other girls want this role because they want to feel important. You, however, care nothing for the opinions of others. You wanted this, although you don’t anymore, because you wished to change things. These girls, of course they hope to witness and cause a change, but your sole purpose is to set things alight and rebuild cities after the flames, and this is a fact you’re well aware of,” Anne stated, her focus shifting from her umbrella to the girl stood in front of her. 

“What about Catherine? Is she not filled with a flame, as I am?”

“Catherine...possesses a warmth, not a fire. Her wish is to change, but she has not the drive, nor the passion, that you do. A role, any role, isn’t suited for her any more than a life of complacent marriage is suited to you. She resents me for my observations, and yet she doesn’t aim to disprove them. That’s how I’m sure she’ll never burn as bright as somebody with a scorching soul will.” At Anne’s words, Clarissa nodded her head, never arguing with her statements about her friend. Catherine was dear to her, the closest companion to her soul she suspected she’d ever have, but she wasn’t tempestuous, possessing no storm behind her eyes, no wind to stoke the embers in her heart, no soul that seemed to drive her every move. 

“When we first started this, my dearest friend and I, we thought it would work perfectly. We fit together as opposite pieces of the same puzzle. But there was a fantastic upset between us, and we discovered we weren’t from the same puzzle at all. Her shades of blue for the sky was actually the colour of the sea for me. We were so contrasting. She wanted to use the information we found to ruin gentlemen’s public image, while I wanted to use it to...convince them to do as we pleased. An enormous case, the one that finally snapped the last threads between us, was with a middle aged gentleman on a big council, with a plethora of people he could influence. We’d made it known to him that we had news of a scandal concerning him, a very secret one I doubt even his wife knew about, and my wish was to use this information to persuade him to add three women onto the board of the council, and to publicly support our ideals for equality so people would listen, for without a voice-”

“We can never gain equality. Anne, that expression seems to come out of your mouth more and more these days,” Clarissa’s tone was jesting, but her countenance had turned grim and there wasn’t a hint of a smile anywhere except her mouth. 

“I say it because it’s true. As I’m sure you know, because your work does a great deal for us and our case.,” Anne shot Clarissa a meaningful glance, but she was too busy glaring at the river as if it were responsible for all her troubles to notice the look coming her way. “While I was eager to be more persuasive, my companion simply wanted to blacken the name of the mayor. I suspected she wanted to seek revenge, as opposed to making a legitimate change, and I said as such to her. My accusation excited her greatly, and before we knew it we’d spoiled the entire plan by causing a rift in our friendship. The mayor was unaffected, because our force wasn’t enough to make a difference as just one person, and it was many years wait before another chance came in which something could be done.” Throwing herself up again, Clarissa began striding across the river, alternating between kicking dirt into it and pulling leaves off the tree that shadowed over it, her mouth set in a firm line the entire time. Without either of them realising it, the rain had stopped, and as suddenly as the drops had stopped pummelling the Earth, her face cleared again, divested of all worry and anger that had overtaken her just seconds before. 

“How can it be that what I do is important? Surely-” As she spoke, her clear expression remained, and her tone was thoughtful rather than virulent. 

“We use information we’ve gathered to prevail upon authority to make the right decisions. There have been arguments that what we do is culpable, that threatening to sully a gentleman’s reputation for our own gain is unladylike or disreputable. But in such circumstances where we have no power, we must use whatever opportunity that comes our way to gain some semblance of authority, which we cannot do without means of control. By collecting the secrets, you give us a way to enforce that control.” Clarissa nodded throughout the entirety of her guardian’s speech, sitting uncharacteristically still.

“I suppose I should pay Mr. Lowood’s mother a visit and gather some secrets. I do enjoy this, I admit. It sometimes feels irrelevant, almost, what I do. But, I suppose you’re correct, and it can be of some importance, even if it doesn’t seem it.” Although she was prepared to leave, pulling her hat back onto the mess of curls and pushing her fingers back into her gloves, she remained in the clearing, some matter of deep thought overtaking her features and causing her expression to look even more vacant that it did when in the company of Mr Lowood. “What happened, after your disagreement with your companion?” 

“Although we tried to come to peace with each other, we were far too different, and we ended on unhappy terms. It’s wrong, but I can’t say I’m upset with what occurred. We only caused each other vexation.” Anne glanced at the girl, who was once more lost in thought, as she strolled out of the clearing, her expression betraying nothing other than cogitation. 

Many weeks later, seated in the parlour Mr Lowood’s estate, listening to his unsought after explanations as he began to sort through a shambolic bookshelf in search of an illustration of a butterfly she had no interest in seeing, Clarissa adjusted her hair and surreptitiously peered at the clock, praying more reverently than she had ever done before that it was finally 3 o clock and Catherine was close to arriving, so she could persuade, or blackmail, Mr Lowood to publicly condone the women who protested for jobs and equality, and to publish complementary features in his newspaper about their doings. An echoed ringing of a bell was heard by Clarissa, and no sweeter sound existed in that moment, and only seconds later an efficient housekeeper bustled in, announcing the arrival of Miss Catherine Reid. 

As her friend walked in, Clarissa felt more confident, standing up, although nowhere near the height of Mr Lowood, and searching his face for a sign of confusion or fear as she spoke, but finding none. Still, she persevered, darting a glance over to Catherine to check that she was indeed saying the correct things. 

“My dear Mr Lowood. I have heard recent news which rather shocked me, entailing details of your dealings with The Times Newspaper. Of course, I don’t suspect any accusations which charge you with publishing false, slandering reports of your rivals to be true, but it would be an awful shame if this information was heard all over respectable society. One could say your reputation would be ruined, just as your competitors’ were. I should hate for this to happen, and I dare say such trouble could be avoided with just a few simple acts from you.” Although Clarissa was threatening the man, he seemed awfully complacent, and she risked a glance over to Catherine to try and see if she had an explanation. A feeling of suspicion and inevitable trouble bloomed inside her at the smile Catherine was giving Mr Lowood, a suspect grin shared between people with a plan.

“Unfortunately, such accusations definitely are false, my dear Miss Alward,” Mr Lowood laughed, not sinister in any way, but disconcerting, taking into account the situation, nonetheless. “However, I also have heard what I’m sure are untruths concerning your relationship with important members of society. Dare I say you are a secret seller? Or a secret trader, whichever term takes your fancy. Your companion, Miss Reid over here, has been having very interesting conversations with me. How much you can learn when talking to somebody. Just as you learnt so much about me when you visited my mother, an elderly sick woman whom you manipulated. Your methods are rather sly, aren’t they? Of course, you’ve convinced yourself it’s for a good cause, but taking advantage of vulnerable members of society and then blackmailing people such as myself isn’t particularly virtuous.” Here he broke off, staring at Clarissa as she watched her world crumble. Catherine, a girl she was utterly assured was her friend, had betrayed her, selling her secrets on. She searched throughout her mind for answers as to why she would betray her as one would search for a missing sock: desperately, and to no avail. Although she was in an undoubtedly serious situation, in which it would be incredibly inappropriate to laugh, she found the irony of the situation amusing. A secret seller, having her secrets sold on to the very person she stole them from? 

“Catherine?” Clarissa muttered, and staring right at her with no remorse on her features, no sentiment of apology, Catherine just nodded at the silent allegations and questions of guilt. 

“I never was of any use. You complained about your role continually, but at least you were important. I was disposable, utterly forgotten in the tide of everyone else,” she said, a humourless laugh escaping her lips, although the only one smiling was Mr Lowood. 

“Now, we can’t have women strutting around, believing themselves to be important, or superior-”

“We don’t wish for superiority, only equality. Surely that’s an admirable motive?” Clarissa interrupted Mr Lowood, her temper suddenly switching from hilarity at the irony to fury at the injustice. 

“Maybe admirable to you, but if I’m to be tainted in your quest, then I disapprove. Now, I’m sure we can come to an agreement and you can forget your trade of stealing secrets, yes? Get married, live life as a mother rather than a rebel,” Mr Lowood continued to grin as he spoke, enjoying the situation far too much for Clarissa’s liking. “Of course, you can choose not to agree, but by doing that, you’ll be resigning yourself to a life of imprisonment. I have great influence over judges, and I’m sure a jury wouldn’t take kindly to your case. Do you agree?” All Clarissa could do was nod, but as she did so, she noticed that her glove, which she’d been pulling on nervously, had ripped, a hole breaking out in the exact spot it did the last time it broke.

@sharing-a-room-with-an-open-fire Thanks for reblogging the November prompts list because I wrote this using it (the prompt I chose was historic)!

[afrival]

Hetalia Characters and Their Music Tastes

I’ve been in the hetalia fandom for like a year now and I stg thinking abt what these bitches listen to NEVER gets old

no warnings

will feature mostly modern day music, like 1950s-2010s

I don’t know a lot of artists that don’t sing in English so there’s probably A LOT that I’m missing on here, not even including shit from like the 1800s

The Allies

Alfred:

Before He Cheats by Carrie Underwood, The Chain by Fleetwood Mac, Crazy In Love by Beyoncé

- Listens to basically everything, but particular fond of like 80s rock and early 2000s shit

- Likes country music bc ofc he does, a huge fan of Carrie Underwood, Sam Hunt, and The Band Perry

- Got his love of rock from England 💀 Especially during the like the 60s-80s when Queen, The Beatles, and Elton John really popular

- They really only bond over their love for this period of music lmao like they would absolutely go ape during karaoke

- He loves more mainstream artists like Beyoncé, Taylor Swift, Lady Gaga, all those iconic mfs

- Probably enjoys old wartime music just for nostalgias sake. Shit from the 40s and he listens to Civil War tunes (Union Dixie lmao)

- Definitely listens to musicals and forces Ivan to as well. His favorites are Hamilton, Hairspray, and Chess

- LOVES LOVES LOVES The Backstreet Bogs holy shit. This man had a whole phase where he dressed like they did. Don’t even dare play I Want It That Way because he WILL sing along

- Speaking of which he’s actually a really good singer, like he probably used to sing at clubs and shit back in the day

- It’s very specific but I imagine his voice to sound like Taron Egerton’s cover of “Crocodile Rock” by Elton John

Arthur:

Killer Queen by Queen, Set Fire to the Rain by Adele, Tiny Dancer by Elton John

- Old man who had a weird punk phase in the 90s. Definitely listens to The Beatles and Gorillaz

- Like I said, he and Alfred bond over Queen and Elton and Bon Jovi and FUCKING Michael Jackson

- Refuses to admit he really likes Elvis

- Oh boy. He had so much fun in like late 2000s and early 2010s— Panic at the Disco, MCR, Green Day, he absolutely got his ears pierced during this time

- Doesn’t listen to like current mainstream music that much he will sob to Adele and probably really likes the Cry Baby album by Melanie Martinez.

- Francis plays so much Lady Gaga in the car that at this point he really likes her music

- He likes Ed Sheeran I am so sorry </3 and he absolutely gets bullied for it

- He can sing too honestly? I know I just said he listens to Ed Sheeran but I honestly think he kinda sounds like him too just maybe a little deeper

- Listen to Galway Girl and you’ll get a basic idea of what I imagine he sounds like

Ivan:

Dance and Cry by Mother Mother, Baby One More Time by Britney Spears, смерти Больше нет by IC3PEAK

- THIS MANS MUSIC TASTE MAKES NO SENSE. It ranges from fucking Aerosmith to Ic3peak to Lady Gaga

- Literally has every Mother Mother album downloaded and probably on Vinyl bc he’s a fucking dweeb

- Also a huge musical stannie, loves Wicked and Hairspray

- He and Al will split the parts to sing along to in the car

- Alfred made him listen to Britney Spears ONCE in like the 90s and now he’s obsessed

- Speaking of the 90s he went absolutely fucking ape during this time. The USSR wasn’t very big on western music but when it fell there was a HUGE influx of it and suddenly like it was just his favorite thing ever

- Alfred also got him into Carrie Underwood, literally lost of his music taste comes from Alfred forcing him to listen to shit

- During the 70s/80s he got really into Fleetwood Mac and Aerosmith, maybe even a little bit of disco but not a lot

- Went to a club with Al a few times and he won’t ever forget dancing to Footloose by Kenny Loggins at like one in the morning and having the absolute time of his life, easily one of his favorite memories

- Like I get so soft thinking about him just letting loose and actually having fun, even though he was very stiff and shit during the 1900s

- He can’t sing LMAO but my friend and I said once that he could lowkey rap really well and now it’s all I think about

Francis:

From Eden by Hozier, La Vie En Rose by Edith Piaf, Primadona by Marina

- If you look up the gay agenda his playlist would just show up

- I mean seriously he has it all: Lana Del Rey, Taylor Swift, Beyoncé, Katy Perry, Lady Gaga, and Lorde

- HOWEVER she does really enjoy softer sounding music. Edith Piaf, Louis Armstrong, and Vera Lynn are favorites of his

- Listens to the Les Mis soundtrack like once a month

- REALLY REALLY loves Hozier, like a whole lot. He’s probably one of his favorite artists along with Sufjan Stevens

- Even more of his homo playlist includes Marina, Madonna and Troye Sivan

- Bullies Arthur for liking Ed Sheeran but he also really likes Ed Sheeran, just refuses to admit it

- Stromae ofc 🙄🤚 can’t just not include like the most popular French musician or whatever

- He can also sing but he sounds kinda raspy, it’s nice tho

Yao:

- I don’t think he listens to music LMAO, if he does it’s probably instrumental

The Axis

Ludwig:

Elastic Heart by Sia, From Now On from The Greatest Showman, Natural by Imagine Dragons

- Also doesn’t really listen to music but my friend said that when he does it ranges from classical to heavy metal

- For some reason I think he really likes Sia, he seems like a Sia kind of guy

- Doesn’t listen to Hozier but really loves Take Me to Church

- Most of his music listening comes from giving Feli the aux in the car

- The whore listens to Imagine Dragons like he fucking loves them

- When The Greatest Showman came out he had the soundtrack on repeat for a solid month, From Now Onis one of his favorite songs ever

- Cannot sing Jesus Christ do not let him near a mic

Feliciano:

Thank u, next by Ariana Grande, Break My Stride by Matthew Wilder, Bella Ciao by Manu Pillas

- Pop music! So much pop!

- Loves Ariana Grande and Conan Gray

- Probably listens to A LOT of classical because of his time with Austria

- His music taste is kinda all over the fucking place and it’s mostly happy and peppy shit

- Weirdly tho he listens to GRLwood? Like it’ll just shhow up on shuffle and suddenly he’s an entire different person

- Will listen to absolutely everything just to find something that Ludwig likes, was so proud of himself when Ludwig really ended up loving The Greatest Showman

- Doesn’t sing but plays like 5 instruments. Violin and piano are his faves

Kiku:

It’s Been So Long by The Living Tombstone, Faded by Alan Walker, Ophelia by The Lumineers

- LISTEN. LISTEN. HE LOVES VIDEO GAME MUSIC AND FUCKING THE LIVING TOMBSTONE

- The fnaf songs are his guilty fucking pleasures, he fucking loves them

- Loves loves loves the Undertake Soundtrack

- Listens to a lot of anime openings 💀 Me too tbh they’re so good at for what

- Big fan of TheFatRat

- In general he enjoys techno shit? Idk what the word is but it’s a lot of instrumental

- Listens to regular music as well (The Lumineers especially)

- Likes listening to Elvis because it makes him happy to see Alfred having fun

- Feli also introduces him to a lot of music but he can never fucking remember the names of the songs or artists

- He hums a lot rather than sings, and it’s really soft and gentle

If anybody wants any more characters lmk bc I love coming up with these, also I do have playlists for these bitches 😎✌️ Spotify is in my linktree (bio)

[elizabeth-against-the-universe]

How old do you guys head canon the Ghosts (BBC) to be (when they died, obviously)? 

I’m awful with ages, but I could probably put them into what I think their age order is, from youngest to oldest (leaving out Humphrey, because we don’t see enough of him to get a real feel for his backstory and personality): 

Kitty is likely the youngest, suggested by her youthful personality, Lolly being the youngest actress by 10 years, and her being an unwed noblewoman in the Georgian era. Average age of marriage then was early 20s, so I would guess that she’s between 18-22? She’s obviously an adult, so I’d lean closer to 22. 

EDIT 2: @bbygrace has told me that Lolly has said multiple times that Kitty is a teenager, so Kitty is probably closer to 18, which I had thought might’ve been the case, tbh. The reason I thought she might’ve been closer to 22 was that she looks older than 18 (because Lolly is 29/30 years old) but obviously that can’t always be considered when trying to work out characters ages. Adults play teenagers in TV shows all the time. 

I think Thomas is probably the next youngest, he was unwed like Kitty, and the average age of marriage in the regency era for men was 25-29, so I would guess that he’s maybe between 22-25. While he was obviously thinking about marriage before his death, but he was still developing his career before marriage (as was common during the time)

It seems like Pat has a very young, barely born son (considering his grandchild was born 36 years after his death, I’m guessing his son was a baby) when he died, and average age of first time fathers in 1980s was about 28, I’m guessing he’s probably 28, maybe a bit older, but I wouldn’t say too much older. Maybe 28-32? 

EDIT 1: @bryneavour let me know that Pat was 39 according to his obituary, which is on Mike’s Ghost Board, which I completely forgot about! Thank you for this, though that does make him a pretty old father for the 80s! 

The average life expectancy for Cavemen was approximately 35, so I reckon Robin is probably close to that. We don’t know a lot about Robin, or much about how he died, but he’s quite mature, in a way, so I’d say he’s between 30-35. 

I think Mary is 40, or very close to 40. Katy Wix is 40 years old, and most women tried for witchcraft were over 40, so I think 40 is a good guess. 

I’d also bet that Julian is the same age as Simon: 47 years old. The average age of an MP was 50 (still is, too), and while he’s sex-obsessed, so you would guess he’s younger, he’s obviously spent a long time in his political career. Hence my guess of 47.

I think the Captain might be similar in age to Julian, but I reckon he’s younger than Lady Button. While Ben is 47, like Simon, his character has grey hair, but that could have been brought on by stress of living in wartime. So I’d put his age at 47-50. (Honestly I have no clue with Captain, tbh, this is all just a guess.)

EDIT 3: @fanta-friends has let me know that Ben’s hair is actually grey, lol. I’d still put the Captain as being slightly older than Julian, because he is so much more mature than Julian, but that could just be his personality type, so idk. 

With Lady Button, the average life expectancy in the early 1900s was 50, so I would put her at that age, maybe with a bit of wiggle room (48-52). We know she didn’t die of natural causes, but she was married, had at least one child, and is quite old, and there are numerous jokes about her age. I’d lean closer to her being 52, so there’s a bigger gap between her and Julian’s age, to make the age jokes really work. 

And apparently I could put approximate ages to them, I put WAY more thought into this post than I was expecting, lol. 

Does anyone agree with my guesses? Does anyone who knows more about history have any other ideas, as most of my information came from super quick Google searches! 

[moki-dokie]

Not jewish so please feel free to tell me I'm out of line here.

It's a misconception/myth that Kellogg was the cause of non-religious circumcisions taking off in the US or even having influence there. The extremely sex-negative puritanical views have been part of american culture from the start. Kellogg was actually opposed to it unless specifically to treat addiction to masturbation. and, as you can guess, his reasonings were antisemitic. The procedure's popularity is because Dr. Lewis A. Sayre who thought it was a cure-all for pretty much every disease known to those who had a penis. (In reality it was just a lucky coincidence that phimosis had gone extremely ignored because gods forbid anyone pay attention to a sexual organ if it wasn't for the purpose of mutilating women. victorian times were... fucking strange. american victorian times were even stranger.)

Sayre's practices weren't rooted in any antisemitic views from what I've ever read. It took off because of a combo of Sayre's claims and cases to back them up, the side-effect of noticeably better hygiene which prevented a lot of illnesses uncut boys presented (yet again, we must avoid the genitals At All Costs, even just to wash them), and victorians obsession with cleanliness + discouragement of masturbation (which was a thing long before Kellogg. He just happened to be a little extra cuckoo for cocopuffs... er cornflakes. The procedure was already popular by the time he started advocating it. and so was the medical community as a whole. aggressively.). It was kind of a perfect procedure for society at the time. It took off like wildfire across the nation and, for a bit, even across the ocean in England.

In fact, it was a follower of Sayre praised jews and their cleanliness and ancient practice of the procedure, noting that there was something to learn from their people. "Moses was a good sanitarian and if circumcision was more generally practiced at the present day, I believe that we would hear far less of the pollutions and indiscretions of youth; and that our daily papers would not be so profusely flooded with all kinds of sure cures for loss of manhood." -Norman Chapman A decade or so later, yet another doctor who agreed with the practice and praised Sayre said much the same. "I would follow in the footsteps of Moses and circumcise all male children." -A. C. Williams. Yet another doctor, J. Henry C. Simes, agreed as well, noting venereal diseases were considerably less prevalent in jews compared to gentiles.

For a short time, everything around circumcision in america was markedly pro-semitic (is that a word??)

(Excerpt from From Ritual to Science: The Medical Transformation of Circumcision in America. A pretty interesting read!)

Annnnd then for some reason, the medical community did a complete 180 on the practice specifically done by jewish people in the early 1900s. tbh i'm not sure what really happened to cause that flip. extremely rare cases were being nitpicked and used to rally against them, trying to label them as barbaric. legislation was introduced trying to ban it. i'm sure there's an obvious reason (aside from people just being antisemetic assholes) that spurred it, but what it was i have no earthly idea.

All of this not to speak over any of you, just to correct the Kellogg thing mostly cause I've seen him mentioned a few times through various rbs and i think it's important to know the actual history as it does further prove the point that rhetoric against it is steeped in antisemitism.

Do you think the sudden outcry against circumcision is rooted in antisemitism? I feel like it is... every person i know who has been circumcised has stated its never posed an issue for them in their life, they've never even thought of it. And I've noticed a lot of these groups are funded by Christian groups, and often even compare circumcision to female genital mutilation, which is in no way ever comparable. I've been trying to help people consider this child be true, but they always say I'm just trying to center Jewish issues too much in an issue that's unrelated.

Oh it's most definitely rooted in antisemitism (also Islamophobia in modern tomes, but anti-circumcision rhetoric wielded against Jews predates Islam). The ancient Greeks and Romans considered circumcised penises to be inferior, and numerous occupiers of Judea placed bans on circumcision to oppress the Jewish people. I wouldn't call the "outcry against circumcision" is sudden at all- it goes back for millennia.

While many cultures practice circumcision, in Western society, circumcision is most associated with Jews. The idea of circumcision as being uniquely barbaric is tied to blood libel which paints Jews as bloodthirsty child molesters and abusers. It is no coincidence that most anti-circumcision groups are funded by Christians- Christianity has demonized circumcision ever since it broke away from Judaism.

Circumcision doesn't really cause significant changes in penis sensation or functionality, and contrary to popular belief, Jews don't circumcise for any aesthetic or sexual reason (like these anti-circumcision "activists" like to claim)- it's purely because it's what G-d commanded us to and because it's our mark of our covenant with Him. And it's absolutely a disservice to victims of FGM to compare circumcision to it.

Anti-circumcision rhetoric cannot be separated from antisemitism.

[lupismaris]

62, 93, 98 for ask meme

62. seven characters you relate to?

Samwise Gamgee, James Flint, John Silver, John Watson, Mary Lennox, Aziraphale, Adam (Frankenstein)

93. nicknames?

Bean (from childhood), Jamie, Mare-bear -, and one barista called me Jaybird and im never getting over that tbh

98. favorite historical era?

as a kid i was obsessed with ancient egypt. Now i find my favorite eras to stury are Golden age of sail and the range of years from like, 1700-1900? theres a lot of anthropologic aspects of many periods that i love, and its easy to say of the victorian era or the meji era or the enlightenment, but i kind of love studying all of it?

but for short hand, age of sail and 1800s european history tends to be my common interests or just what i have the most residual knowledge about

[cullxtheherd]

oh my god I haven't thought about BtVS in so long fdjsaio tell me some of your Angel/Angelus headcanons (insert eyes emoji here)

jhbjghljkghkfgl; oh my GOD i honestly never stopped loving AtS or BtVS!! bgut i did stop watching originally when Doyle perished cause?? sorry but he is babey and though i do understand why the actor was let go from his role, it's still super upsetting. i hate the episode Hero and also love it to pieces- just watched it yesterday and screamed ALLEN FRANCIS NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO for just. so long. tbh i was thinking about adopting him as a muse but tbh with you Angel and older 90s/early 00s muses don't get much attention anyways so i haven't yet skdjksds maybe after Harry from Resident Alien later tonight gets added I'll think about it again ksjdksjd. ANYWAYS THIS ISN'T WHAT YOU ASKED FOR KSJDSkfsd ON WITH IT!! just be aware there is no way i can include all the headcanons here so i'll just hlglhkglkhlgk about the ones i can think of asap

𝓐𝓷𝓰𝓮𝓵

in the show (both buffy & angel) they are constantly telling us through dialogue, scene setting, etc that the reason Angel and (later) Spike hate killing and feeding suddenly is because "killing humans = bad ☹ grr, arrgh." i think it runs deeper than this. i think they are not solely repulsed because it is the morally wrong thing to do. i think they are disgusted in?? an almost obsessive way because of how badly they'd still like to do it despite knowing better and having control over themselves. certain episodes the way Angel and Spike's portrayals go: yes definitely they are giving us that and barely highlighting it. but i really. i don't remember either show ever coming out and saying it outright.

personally i think that the Buffy/Angel romance seems waaaayyy super crazy rushed in the show and i'm not really sure if they/joss even meant it like that! it just really be seeming that way af!!! logically the whole affair lasts about/just shy of three years if we are doing the maths and technically?? it really took 1.5 years before they even did the ol squelchy welch. which lmaooa jksdhkdjsfd can you imagine?? any young adults in a consenting relationship actually waiting that long?? yeah ekjnbswedsdxfks anyways. i just? idk. loved AtS and BtVS very much but his departure seemed super rushed and so did their romance bye sjhdbfs

speaking of?? while i am very much a buffy/angel ship supporter as an adult i do find it so freaking weird he?? was made by Darla in 1898 and theennnn spent 171 motha fuckin years parading around as Angelus- didn't even know about Buffy Summers until he was already 269 (nice) and when acathala SHAT his ass back out he was already 371, she was a juNIOr in higHSCHOOOLPLK ANNNDDD i have a hEAdache i gotta goooOO

no but really i. skhjfjhgf as an adult i am weirded out but?? idk it's one of my childhood ships i gotta pry it from my OWN cold dead hands i guess smh

personally i think Angel keeps trinkets from the people he's saved over the years. and i don't mean at random Investigations via his detective agency or, later, Wolfram & Hart. i mean?? the cases we see like?? the episode 'are you now or have you ever been' that takes us back to the 1950s and the Hyperion Hotel in it's heyday. angel aided a woman named Judy Kovacs- albeit rather reluctantly to try and escape and THEN a literal MOB beat and lynched his ass and thennNNNN, in present time, he fights against the same life-sucking chaos-causing Thesulac demon with his friends/colleagues. after all of this he finds Judy somehow still in her room (214) surviving just a few doors down from his (217) so many years ago just?? waiting. and while canonically the show has Angel in room 312? I disagree. i think he would have taken up residence in 214 or 217...... 214 cause i'm feeling sappy. check his bathroom cabinets i bet you it's got at least a few of her accoutrements living inside.

i think?? despite?? darla not being able to take his soul via the big squelchy that he and Angelus really did care about her- heck!! in the early?? 1900s he DID try to return to her and adapt to her violent way of life he just couldn't do it

while i am?? verryyy willing to write buffy/angel ship stuff i really do think after the events in I Will Remember You it would take a literal set of miracles to get him to even attempt being with Buffy again. i think that while he will always love her no matter what that he has learned that?? things that are or seem too?? good or pure for a creature like him genuinely are. though he is/was the Powers That Be-s-es-es?? ES favorite ensouled boy-toy i really, genuinely do think that a happy ending is just NOT in the cards for our boyo

if buffy wasn't evidence enough of that fact?? cordy. Skip really came and took her just like that. then the whatevers that WHOEVER shat her back out to really just give birth to jasmine and connor and i rrepwsrenbjhdfbskdjnsf worst. season. EVER. i refuse i fucking REFUSE TO EGHV ADBAKJSDFALKFNKSADJF???!?!?!?! i hate it so much. i hate it. so. m u c h. connor and cordy should have never EVER been a thing and i will erase it from history if i have to give birth to myself to do it

𝔸𝕟𝕘𝕖𝕝𝕦𝕤

hoo babey. while angel is?? reserved and doesn't?? really mention any kind of explorative or wild side with any regularity in the show this wild child leather-pants-wearing abomination gives NO shits. he is very, VERY pansexual and you can fight my spirit on top of my grave about it.

regarding the last thing i said: there was definitely a polyamorous relationship happening between Angelus, Darla, Spike and Drusilla in my book. there are certain... jealous scenarios- heck!! just LOOK at episodes with Spike where he's being pouty about not getting the proper attention he deserves. if you think this is just about Dru i am begging you to reconsider

also?!?!?!?! PENN?! Penn was so obsessively and grossly in love with Angelus his sire I can not EVEN BEGIN TO FIUBNFDAKJSDFN

i think?? there are times in Angel's day-to-day where he not only misses but craves the presence of Angelus and visa versa. Angelus obviously seems a bit more openly repulsed by his softer side cause like?? each half is SO strongly suited to one extreme and?? as much as Angel and Angelus would both loathe my next statement: two halves do make a whole.

i think that while?? Angel may be cursed with a soul, that's not all. Angelus doesn't have regular control any longer, for sure, but i really do think it is oftentimes a daily battle to tune him out. why?? the orb of thesulah is only used to summon and store a human soul until it is re/tethered to a body. the ritual that the "Gypsies" and Willow performed didn't?? do anything with the actual demon. it didn't send it back to whatever Hell dimension it came from it just?? gave angel a soul- it gave what was left of Liam (O'Connor if you follow fan-lore) control over himself and the demon inhabiting his body. though the show never depicts or portrays this i am willing to bet real money that somewhere, deep down Angelus is on the inside rattling his mirror against the bars screaming: IM HENRY THE EIGTH I AM I AM!!! over and over an over and ov-

angel, however, when not in control seems to go into some semi-mostly dormant state as evidenced by the fact that he was entirely gone during their time in Acathala and relied on solely the demon half to get him through, but?? i'm 56% sure he is there sniveling in the ether when Angelus is driving he's just?? clearly not as strong mentally.

while?? Angel is a very respectable creature who cares about and loves his friends/found family i really do think that Angelus loves NO ONE. i think he cares about a few entities but i do not think he is capable of love proper as we think of it- both shows continuously remind us that number one in Angelus's world is, in fact, Angelus which means...

i doubt he really cares about pleasing his partner/s where that is likely Angel's main objective and lskjdnfjd i really have to go before this gets super raunchy