#obi wan x gender neutral reader

[moonyswritinq]

losing you — obi-wan kenobi x gn reader

❝ LOSING YOU ❞

SYNOPSIS➢You could never resist saying no to Obi-Wan Kenobi when he needed your help. It led to a capture by the Sith, and a near death. A daring escape, a battle of hearts and good and evil, and a climax of feelings could hopefully reveal the truth within your hearts.

PAIRING ➢ obi-wan kenobi x gender neutral reader

AU ➢ friends/rivals to lovers

CONTENT WARNING ➢ swearing, sexual tension, angst, mutual pining, hurt/comfort, depictions of fighting, battling, canon-typical violence, side character deaths, sort of protective Obi-Wan

WORD COUNT ➢ 4.5 k

AUTHORS NOTE ➢ i started writing this so long ago, and am now so sick of it that i hate it with my entire being. i missed posting anything for May the Fourth, so consider this my meagre contribution. hope you still enjoy!

MASTERLIST

The thousands of voices that filled your ears and the sharp glare from the sun against your closed eyelids were the first things you noticed. Slowly, you opened your eyes and took in your surroundings. You were in the middle of an arena with hundreds of foul creatures in the stands, cheering and throwing taunts when they noticed you were awake.

You tried to look further, but as soon as you moved your head a sudden sharp pain shot through it, making you wince. You didn’t remember getting a blow to the head, which meant it was probably a pretty bad one. As you stood tied to the pole with chains against your wrists, you watched a few guards drag a figure between them. They tied it to the pole next to you, and left it slumped against the ground. 

That’s when you remembered.

The fight. A lightsaber. Obi-Wan fucking Kenobi.

You two had been ambushed by the very targets he’d been hunting, and you only got caught up in the crossfire because he had asked for your help. He hadn’t needed you, and you didn’t have to accept, but something compelled you to and now you were stuck in this mess. If only you were smart enough to be able to walk away. 

Unfortunately, Obi-Wan was your weakness.

You watched his unconscious figure lean against the poll, and you couldn't help but let your eyes trail over him. They jumped from the way his strong hands hung in the handcuffs (something you definitely had thought of before, just in a different situation) to the way the sun hit his smooth skin and highlighted his cheekbones. You watched his muscular chest rise and fall steadily with every breath, and how his golden hair seemed to shine even brighter. You even let your gaze travel even more south, but it quickly jumped up again from the guilt.

You blinked and redirected your gaze before his force, or magic—something—somehow notice your staring, but it was already too late. Obi-Wan grimaced as he opened his eyes, licking his lips and clearing his throat. The dry desert air did nothing but evil to your lungs.

Finally, he looked over at you and said, “I know I’m handsome, darling, but there may be a time and place for that.”

Your eyes immediately moved to his and you found him smirking smugly at you, which you couldn’t help but roll your eyes at.

“Oh, please, you wish I was admiring you, Kenobi. I was just wondering how the hell I should get back at you.” Every word from your tongue was drenched with faux venom.

Obi-Wan lifted an eyebrow. “Oh, really? And what might I have done to upset you this time?”

You laughed humourlessly at his words, gesturing around the both of you. “Is your skull really that thick? I’m stuck here because of you.”

He looked at you sceptically. “Me? Weren’t you supposed to be the look out and keep an eye on my back?”

“No, well—yes, but it wasn’t my fault.” If you had to be honest, you had been distracted by him. Obi-Wan had sat and talked with you, always being his charming self. So, really, it was his fault you hadn’t noticed the ambush. “You dragged me into this in the first place.”

He shook his head with a smile and tried to stand up straighter. “If I remember correctly—“

“You probably don’t, you took a pretty ugly blow to the head,” you interrupted. He fixed you with a pointed look, but it only made you more amused.

“—you weren’t forced to come with. You wanted to be with me.”

You grimaced at his choice of words, but were determined not to let him in on your feelings.

“And if I remember correctly, you begged me. So technically, you wanted to be with me.”

His smile told you he was enjoying this just as much as you were, and had no plans on stopping. “Oh, you know me so well, darling. I always want to be with you.”

“Exactly what I wanted to hear,” you smirked.

Even though you loved the words coming from his mouth, they were filled with the same sarcastic venom as yours. If you had to be honest with yourself, it hurt. You tried to ignore the feeling when your eyes moved to a movement in the further end of the arena. Two convoys were starting to move towards you and Obi-Wan, with two people inside of them. Obi-Wan straightened when they were within earshot.

“I was beginning to wonder if you’d got my message,” he said.

A younger man and woman was being led out by guards and you could see the boy was also a Jedi, but one in training, from the robes he wore to the braid in his hair.

“I retransmitted it,” he said, “just as you requested, Master.” The couple were being tied to a pole each, the same way you were tied. “Then we decided to come rescue you.”

Obi-Wan rolled his eyes as the corners of his lips tugged into half a smile. “Good job.”

You almost laughed at his sarcasm and managed to let out a snort instead. That was the first time the man seemed to have noticed you. His eyes studied you from top to bottom and then turned to Obi-Wan.

“Who is this you are with, Master?” he questioned.

Obi-Wan glanced at you, sending you a quiet question. Who were you to him?

“They—“ he began.

You interrupted him before he could finish. You were dreading to hear the words ‘they’re just my friend’, even though you knew you could never be anything more.

“I’m his amazing partner,” you smiled. “The one who always gets him out of these messes.”

The man raised an eyebrow and glanced at his Master. “Really?” he asked.

Obi-Wan threw you a pointed look. “No, I’m the one who always gets you out of messes, not the other way around,” he said. “If you had just done your job and kept a lookout we wouldn’t be here.”

You feigned offence at his remark. “Excuse you, you were the one distracting me, which means it was really all your fault,” you said.

“So you do admit I am a distraction to you, darling?” Obi-Wan smiled smugly. 

You choked on your words and felt your cheeks burn. You knew he was unaware of your feelings, but that only made it hurt more. Maybe entertaining this sort of flirty banter wasn’t a good idea. It only made your hopes for something more to happen multiply. And that wasn’t fair—to either of you.

“No,” you bit out before you looked away from him entirely. He frowned, but turned away to converse with the other Jedi as you tuned them out.

—

Obi-Wan Kenobi was confused.

He had asked for your help on his mission because he knew you were in a nearby town, and because you knew how to handle your blasters. Really well. He had always admired that about you, even though he considered them a bit uncivilised, and he would never admit it. Instead Obi-Wan always decided to send a snide remark or comment your way, even when you were shooting perfectly.

“Maybe you should try hitting the target one day, y/l/n,” he shouted the one time you had missed your practice target.

What he didn’t know was that you had missed because you had been staring at his training with his lightsaber. You couldn’t help it; because, come on, Obi-Wan doing sword practices? He looked hot as fuck. It had made you glare daggers at him and you’d thrown the blaster his way.

“Why don’t you try it then? See if you’re so much better, Master Kenobi,” you challenged.

His smile only widened as he studied your approaching, crossing his arms over his chest.

“I’d rather not, darling,” he said. “You know I have no luck with those things.” You picked up the blaster and pressed it against his chest, leaning in closer to him.

“Oh, come on, Obi-Wan,” you purred. “Don’t tell me you’re afraid.”

His mind went blank at your words. You were so close to him now, he would only need to lean down a bit and your lips would be touching. Oh, how he wished to feel your lips on his. He shook the thought away and smiled at you.

“Yes, I am very afraid that you might be better than me at something.”

You moved away and chuckled, taking up your shooting position again. “I’m better than you at a lot of things.”

Obi-Wan quirked an eyebrow. “Oh, yeah? Care to enlighten me?”

“I can think of a few things,” you had winked at him.

The insinuation was enough for Obi-Wan’s cheeks to redden, but he turned away and left the subject at that. That was how you two always were. A few insults thrown in here and there, and even though he cared not to admit it, there were some flirty elements as well.

And that was why he was confused as to your sudden cold exterior. He replayed the conversation in his mind, trying to figure out why it had gone south. Did he say something wrong? Had he done something wrong?

He was brought out of his thoughts by the voice of Anakin.

“Master?” he asked, and Obi-Wan only blinked at him.

“Yes, Anakin?”

He sighed and shook his head. “That was the third time I tried to get your attention. What is going on?” He glanced at you on the other side of his master, at you, and lowered his voice. “Is it your partner? Who are they, really?”

“It’s nothing, Anakin,” Obi-Wan replied. Anakin seemed to ponder his words for a moment, and Obi-Wan was completely content on letting the conversation go.

Anakin frowned. “Why haven’t I heard about them until now?”

Obi-Wan quirked an eyebrow. “There are many things you do not know about me, Anakin. I like to keep some things private.”

“I understand,” came his voice, a bit too smug for Obi-Wan’s liking.

Obi-Wan turned to him. “What exactly do you ‘understand’?”

Anakin inclined his head to where you were standing. “I just want to let you know that it’s okay, Master.”

“Anakin, I have no idea what you are talking of.”

He rolled his eyes, leaning as close to Obi-Wan as he could. “I’m talking about the two of you,” he said.

Obi-Wan’s cheeks immediately burned. “y/n y/l/n is an old friend,” Obi-Wan whisper-shouted. “We’ve known each other since we were kids.”

“Come on, Master, I heard the way you were talking to each other. Frankly, it’s quite obvious.”

Obi-Wan glared at Anakin for him to shut up. He glanced at you beside him, trying to keep the younger Jedi’s words from sinking into him, but to no avail. He was aware of the insinuations that often existed in your conversations, and the way your words were too often far from strictly platonic. He knew you were good looking in the standard way, as he often saw heads turn in your direction and flirty smiles sent your way, though he had never allowed himself to think of you that way. It was dangerous territory for a Jedi and he wasn’t sure he’d be able to resist if he allowed himself to give in.

But now, when the both of you stood at your death row, almost out of options, it put things in perspective. Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad if he—

A sudden cheer went up in the stadium, bringing his attention away from you. A voice sounded, in a strange language he couldn’t understand, and four doorways opened at the end of the arena. Out walked four creatures, each one horrific in its own way, and led by guards with spears. They were careful to not walk too close.

“I’ve got a bad feeling about this,” Anakin said beside him. Obi-Wan hated to admit he agreed, but forced himself to think rationally.

“Just relax. Concentrate.” He directed the words to his padawan, but they were for himself as much as for Anakin.

“What about Padme?” he asked, drawing Obi-Wan’s attention away from the oncoming monsters. He glanced behind Anakin, seeing that she was using her chain to climb the pillar.

With a smile he said, “She seems to be on top of things.”

Anakin glanced behind him, nodding, and forced calming breaths to release through his lungs. Obi-Wan looked your way, afraid he’d worry for you. Instead, you stood still, almost like a statue, looking directly in front of you. Your gaze was calculating, deadly calm, like a soldier’s calm, and your breathing was even. He didn’t know how, but you seemed to not worry even one bit at the oncoming creature.

He didn’t have time to think over it more when a creature with long claws closed in on him, throwing a leg against his chains, severing it. Obi-Wan threw himself to the side, narrowly avoiding the attack. Shouts and cheers went all around him, making him more dizzy than he already was. He tried to focus on the creature as he kept tumbling out the way, every time closer than the first. He went behind the pillar to take cover, but the monster felled it, causing it to tumble down in a load crash towards him.

Before he could understand what was happening, Obi-Wan was tumbling against the ground, rolling in a heap. The only thing was that your weight was on top of him, holding him down. He was too aware of every place you touched, shivering even through the chaos that was going on around you. You quickly glanced down at him before jumping to your feet, extending an arm for him to drag himself to his own feet. You kept ahold of his hand, tugging him along as you ran out of the creature’s path. Obi-Wan was afraid to think of what would’ve happened without you there.

He looked to the side, seeing one of the guards with a spear, taking it to throw at the monster behind you. For a second, he thought it’d worked. But then, it snapped the spear in half and continued its chase for the both of you. Thankfully, right then, Anakin and Padme appeared atop one of the other creatures, a massive horn at its front. He gestured for the both of you to get on, and without thinking, Obi-Wan grabbed your hand again and pulled you with. He helped you up in front of him. He hesitated, just a moment, before letting his arms snake around your midriff. You felt it, tensing against the feeling of him. You realised this was the wrong moment to be shy about contact, but you also realised the meaning of letting him fall against you so.

Obi-Wan let his head lean against your shoulder, ignoring the warning shouts put there by the Jedi’s so-called ways. He was tired of keeping distance from you only because of formalities. Seeing you in danger as he had done earlier, it scared him more than he dared admit. He needed to make the most out of the time you had left together.

“I—“ he began, but was interrupted by the tumbling of droids appearing, pointing their guns at the four of you.

You turned to look him in the eye, searching for any signs of reassurance there. You found none. Obi-Wan did not have a second plan, something to get them out of this major mess. He was finally out of ideas. Your lips tugged downwards at the sight of his hopeless gaze. You understood as well as he did how fucked you were.

And that’s when it happened; when dozens of lightsabers appeared in the crowding stands; they were lit in varying colours of blue, green, and, one particular, in purple. Their light reflected onto their bearers, revealing countless Jedis ready to fight. The rest of the crowd began to flee, previously cheering for the slaughter of the four of you, now cowards to the fight that would inevitable ensue.

A smile lit up your face, gazing onto the new turn of events. Maybe it wasn’t over for the two of you.

It quickly faded when more droids appeared, running over the arena to get a good shot on you. The Jedis were just as quick, jumping from the stadiums to meet the blasters with their sabers. Obi-Wan grabbed a nearby lightsaber and freed first himself, and then you, from the chains. You ran to pick up two blasters, lying nearby a fallen droid. You didn’t have time to think about the others before fire was upon you and it was all you could do to fire off shot after shot, fell enemy after enemy as your aim found its marks. Obi-Wan was soon beside you, twirling his lightsaber in beautiful circles and cutting down every droid in his vicinity. If you weren’t in mortal danger, you’d say he was enjoying himself with the way his lips formed in the faintest smile.

It was difficult keeping track of everyone and everything when all your surroundings were filled with was the light of blasters going for their mark and the glowing of lightsabers cutting into metal. Your ears were ringing, shouts and blasting muffled by the concentration of keeping your head connected to your body. All you could focus on was the next droid to appear in your path. One at a time, to keep you from losing hope and getting overwhelmed. But even you could admit that it was seeming bleak. The numbers on your side were dwindling and you felt a faint thudding in your left arm, which you had conveniently managed to ignore until now.

A sudden shriek called for your attention when the creature from before was charging for you again. You could feel your muscles locking up, the fear setting into them, while your mind was screaming for you to run. Instead, you stood there with a gaping mouth, awaiting the blow that would inevitable come upon you.

Before it did, a lightsaber cut into the creature’s path and sent its head rolling to the dirty ground, its body dropping in a lifeless heap. You turned, seeing Obi-Wan with his lightsaber raised, panting hard. His gaze turned to you with widened eyes. His legs moved before you did and managed to catch you before you fell to the ground, your legs folding beneath you. The paralysing fear was gone and in its place had an overwhelming sense of dread settled, causing your body to finally catch up with your mind. You almost wept against his robes, holding onto his shoulders to steady yourself. Obi-Wan’s arms circled you, his eyes searching you for any fatal injuries. When he couldn’t find any, he allowed his hand to smooth against your cheek, tilting your head to look at him.

“You okay?” he asked.

You nodded absentmindedly. First now you realised the closeness of him, and how vulnerable you both were in the middle of the battlefield. You turned at the same time, ready to cut down any droids, but it turned out unnecessary as the remaining Jedis had formed a protective circle around all of you, their lightsabers raised against the onslaught of droids. They stopped in their tracks as Count Dooku’s voice rang out, loud and clear, calling for a cease of fire. He was telling you how the fight was over; you were outnumbered; to lay down your weapons in arms; you were practically dead.

The Jedis looked around, uncertain on whether it was possible to win this fight. You met the droids with a steeled gaze; you’d rather die here, on the battlefield, than in some dungeon of the Sith’s. Obi-Wan looked to you and you saw the same determination reflected in his eyes. You wished to rather not die at all, but it was the lesser of two evils.

As if by reading your thoughts, suddenly battleships descended to the arena — stormtrooper ships. You let out a breath of relief; however ready you were to go down in battle someday you were glad today wouldn’t be that day.

With the help of the stormtroopers, your numbers were suddenly in the majority, felling the droids quickly and swiftly. The fight was far from over, though. Obi-Wan nudged your arm, nodding to one of the ships. You ran after him, with Anakin and Padme in the lead, onto the hovering ship and it lifted in the air. You looked around to see other stormtroopers on the ship, with only God knows what thoughts swimming behind those helmets of theirs.

“Dooku is making his escape,” said Obi-Wan, pointing ahead of him. You looked to see two slender ships  and a speeder-bike flying at full speed.

One of the troopers nodded, and the ship picked up in speed. Your feet stumbled at the change, unprepared for the sudden jolt in the metal beneath you. Obi-Wan’s arm instinctively reached out and snaked around your waist, pulling you close to him.

“Hold on,” he said.

You ignored the warmth of both his body so close to you and the sudden rush of it in your cheeks. Miles of sandbanks stretched beneath you, only fleeting with the quick speed you were travelling. Ahead, you noticed that there was only one spacecraft left in your pursuit. Hopefully, you’d be able to get this mission done with and go back to your not-so-peaceful abode; all of this were definitely more than you’d originally bargained for.

With another jolt of your ship, it threw all of you off-balance and a shriek sounded. You turned to see Padme fall out of the open door. Anakin reached for her but Obi-Wan was there within a second to snatch away his wrist, pulling him from the opening.

“Put the ship down!” Anakin cried.

“Anakin, don’t let your personal feelings get in the way!” Obi-Wan shouted back, effectively ignoring your gaze. He turned to the front and called, “Follow that speeder!”

You turned Obi-Wan’s words over in your mind. Of course he wouldn’t stray from the Jedi way, not even for you. Had you then only imagined his lingering gaze and touches that existed a moment too long? Had your mind created the delusions of Kenobi’s want to protect you during the fight, or had he only happened to be nearby to help you?

Whatever the matter, you felt it smartest to not be present for the coming fight. You called out to the two Jedis.

“I’ll go after her, you handle Dooku.”

Obi-Wan turned. “No, wait— y/n!”

Before he could take hold of you, you had dropped out the opening with bent knees meeting the sandbank, landing with a compact you were not ready for. You rolled, tucking your head into your chest and quickly jumped to your feet. You had jumped out of the ship a little later than Padme and had to walk back the distance to find her again.

She laid on the sand, outstretched, with her head resting to the side. You ran to her quickly, letting her head rest under your hand and shaking her slightly in a careful attempt to wake her up. Her eyelids slid open carefully, before blinking wide up at you. Her limbs hurried with panic in an attempt to stand up and she almost tripped herself.

“Hey, hey, calm down!” you said, disentangling yourself from her. “You’re okay, you’re safe.”

She stopped struggling but stayed wide-eyed as she let herself take a few calming breaths. Eventually she had found her voice enough to ask, “Where’s Anakin?”

“Still pursuing Dooku. C’mon, we gotta get back to camp.”

Padme’s head shook before you finished your sentence, looking around. “No, no, we gotta follow them. We gotta help.”

You swallowed, nodding absentmindedly. You wanted to help Obi-Wan but you were afraid how he would react to seeing you after the fighting was done. Would he turn you away, and ultimately let the Jedi’s ways steer his life? Or would he allow you to get close to him, invite you into his life as something more than just a friend?

You pondered these questions as you managed to find a troop of stormtroopers and commandered a spacecraft to follow the pursuit of Count Dooku. Soon enough, a castle of some sort, made of a reddened stone with high spires, reached towards the muddied sky. Your craft landed and as a ship departed, speeding faster than you could react, towards outer space.

If that were Count Dooku escaping then that meant Anakin and Obi-Wan hadn’t managed to stop him. And that meant…

Your legs started to move faster than your mind could catch up, praying that what you feared wouldn’t be true. Your feet echoed against the ground as you ran into the cave, Padme following right behind you. When you entered the hollow room your eyes immediately landed on Obi-Wan’s form.

He was alive—barely standing and taking shallow breaths—but alive nonetheless.

His hand was grasped around his knee, barely being able to keep himself up. It looked as if it took everything in him not to slump to the floor. You hastened your steps in his direction, ready to just about sling yourself against him. You catched yourself in a moment, remembering the Jedi’s modest ways.

His eyes met yours as he let his hand let go of the lightsaber. His eyes softened, almost unintelligibly, and his lips quirked into a tired smile. Obi-Wan took the barest step toward you, his leg folding beneath him. You were there in an instant, letting your weight support his as much as his was supporting you. Your arms snaked around his waist, letting your head fall in the crook of his shoulder. His head laid on yours, his hair tickling your skin. As tired, and muddy, and miserable you were you couldn’t keep from the warmth spreading in the pit of your stomach.

Obi-Wan didn’t seem to mind any of the other Jedi’s in the room as he let his embrace pull you even closer to him. He pulled back the barest inch to whisper against your ear, “Don’t you ever dare scare me like that again.”

“What, when I dropped out of the spacecraft, you mean?”

You felt him shake his head against you. “Just today in general.”

“Afraid to lose me, Jedi?”

You tried not to chuckle, but it was difficult when you felt the dangers of the day receding from your mind and all that was left was an immense relief that elated your entire body. Obi-Wan pulled away entirely, letting his hands grip your shoulders for support. Your hands had a hold of his waist.

“Losing you would affect me more than you could ever imagine.”

You grinned as you tugged him into a hug again, pressing him even more intimately against you. There was no longer any doubt as to what Obi-Wan meant to you, and as to what you meant to him. He didn’t care what the council or the Jedis thought; he’d have you as yours. And you smiled at the thought.

[cinnamon-galaxies]

Jealousy and Principles (Obi-Wan x reader)

Pairings: Obi-Wan x GenderNeutral!Reader Warnings/Tags: Jealousy, light swearing, dispute Summary: The reader is a former Jedi who's left the order many years ago! You and Obi-Wan are on a mission to obtain information from a high-ranking Separatist. In a cantina, which according to rumors is supposed to be his retreat, you decide to use advantage of your flirty skills which awakes jealousy in Obi-Wan. Words: 1.4k A/n: This is my first Obi-Wan x reader one shot. English isn't my first language so I'm sorry for any possible grammar or spelling mistakes! But I hope you enjoy it and let me know if you're interested in a part two!

~~~~~~~~~~

Thick, hot air hit you as you and Obi-Wan entered the cantina. The noise of loud voices talking over one another, laughing, and loudly clinking drinks was a stark contrast to the quiet outside on the near-empty streets of the small town on the Outer Rim planet you visited. You and Obi-Wan had a mission to complete, as there were rumors that this cantina was the home retreat of a high-ranking Separatist who was hiding information useful to the Republic.

“I think we should order a drink,” you said as you and Obi-Wan sat down at a table in one of the corners of the room.

Obi-Wan's eyebrows furrowed critically. But before he could say anything, you continued. "To blend in with the other guests."

Obi-Wan nodded in understanding. He didn't seem too keen on the idea because he knew you were someone who was likely to take a look too deeply into the glass. But after all, you were undercover. Disguised in civilian clothing, you might look like ordinary citizens but anyone who sat in a cantina without drinking anything gave a questionable impression—at least to the staff.

You looked around and raised your hand as you made eye contact with one of the waiter droids. His cylindrical form rolled towards your table and made a loud beeping noise.

“Two of those blue drinks, please,” you ordered and the droid beeped again and then rolled away.

"That guy over there with the gray jacket and the beard. That must be him," Obi-Wan stated, pointing with his chin at a small group of humans and aliens chatting and enjoying their drinks.

You followed his nod and located the group he was talking about. Your eyes scanned every single face, not only to identify the target, but also to check out his companions. They seemed inconspicuous. Like normal civilians. It was the same disguise you and Obi-Wan wore. But since you and Obi-Wan had both saved an image of the Separatist on your data pads, you knew exactly that this man, sitting in a group like a normal person, was unmistakably the target you were looking for.

"He looks much more attractive in real life than in the photo," you said jokingly, your eyes not leaving your target's frame. Tob be honest, he was surprisingly handsome. What a shame he was one of the bad guys, you thought.

By staring at the strange man, you didn't notice Obi-Wan grimacing. "I don't think that-" he started, but was interrupted by the arrival of the beeping waiter droid that brought your drinks.

“Thank you,” you smiled at the little droid as you took your drinks from his tray. They were way bigger than expected. Not as usual as in a small glass, but more like a whole cocktail. With a shallow smile on your lips, you toasted Obi-Wan and took the first sip. Your throat immediately burned as the strong liquid ran down your esophagus and you immediately felt even warmer than you already were in the hot canteen. Then your gaze slid back to the separatist and his handsome face. And that's exactly what gave you an idea. "I know how we can get information out if him," you stated.

Obi-Wan took his glass to his mouth as he listened.

“I’m going to seduce him,” you explained.

Obi-Wan paused his sip, on the verge of choking. “Excuse me?” he asked incredulously, feeling his heart beat going faster.

"You heard me right. If there's one thing that can influence a man, it's a charismatic, stupidly-faithful Y/G."

Obi-Wan, far from enthusiastic about the idea, didn't respond. The tension in him was obvious, but you didn't notice. You were far too convinced that your plan would be successful.

"Y/N-," Obi-Wan began, but by then you were already standing up, pushing the empty chair to the table and walking over to the Separatist.

Obi-Wan sighed. Clutching his drink tightly, he took a sip and watched you on the way to that man. He couldn't quite explain what he was feeling as he observed from a distance as you sat down next to the target and engaged in a flirtatious conversation. He struggled to reconcile the mission's necessity with the unsettling feeling that gnawed at his core. All of this felt so wrong to him. In many ways. Of course he was aware of the fact that you weren't a Jedi and haven't been for many years. So the rules of the order didn't apply to you. But the uncharted territory of your alliance collided with the principles deeply ingrained in his Jedi upbringing and his jaw tightened.

The melody of your hauntingly enchanting voice reached Obi-Wan's ears. He wasn't able to understand a single word you said from his distance so his mind made up it's own conversation between you and the separatist that was both exaggerated and also not very unlikely to happen. After all, Obi-Wan knew who you were and what you were capable of.

His chest hurt in a way it never hurt before as a feeling of jealousy covered his senses. Shocked by his own thought he took nother sip from his drink, his hand trembling as he reached for the glass. He wasn't jealous. He couldn't be. His inner conflict definitely had to have something to do with his Jedi principles and your inappropriate behavior.

Obi-Wan watched you lean far towards the target. A seductive smile on your face underlined the shimmer of excitement in your eyes. You seemed to be truly interested in the separatist's narration, in a way that exceeded the whole idea of the mission and your attempt to seduce information out of him. And the Jedi fcking hated it.

It felt like the whole night has passed when you finally stood up from your seat next to the separatist and strolled back to Obi-Wan.

"I was successful," you said with a slight smile on your face, your cheeks still red from the flirty conversation.

Obi-Wan, who still suffered from the echo of that awful wrenching feeling in his guts, didn't give any attention to what you just said. Instead he took a deep breath and shot his blue eyes to yours. "Was that really necessary?" he asked with a bitter tone underlining his voice.

"What do you mean?" you replied confused not understanding what was wrong with your success.

Obi-Wan stared at you with a cold expression and a feeling of discomfort and concern awoke deep inside your chest. "The flirting."

You blinked twice as you stated at him with confusion and before you were able to open your mouth Obi-Wan continued his examination. "This was not the Jedi way. You just broke the code in one of the most inappropriate ways possible and went against the most important of my Jedi principles."

The moment his words entered your brain the feeling of concern turned into anger. "Are you kidding me?" you replied harshly. "I just degraded myself by flirting with one of our biggest enemies and you're sitting here being displeased by my practices instead of being satisfied with the outcome? I'm not a Jedi, Obi-Wan!"

"But you've been a Jedi before," Obi-Wan stated.

You took s sharp breath, furious because of his absolutely dim-witted stubbornness. "And?What's the point of your arguments? I've left the order years ago and you, out of everyone, should know best that I don't give a damn shit about neither the code nor the Jedi principles!"

"And that's exactly the problem!" Obi-Wan replied, his voice becoming louder. You saw a flash of anger in his eyes and felt even more offended by his audacity to criticize you for breaking a code you don't follow while he, in the exact same minute, did the same by letting himself be guided by his emotions.

You took a deep breath before calming your voice to a level that reflected both your weariness towards this conversation and your feeling of disappointment because of the ungratefulness the Jedi confronted you with. "You knew exactly what I am when we started our alliance."

With those words you left the cantina ans entered the darkness of a starless night. You felt like even talking to a wall would have a more productive outcome than this conversation. Obi-Wan was supposed to be a good friend of yours but right now your efforts don't seem to be appreciated. And it also doesn't seem like he truly accepts you for who you are.

[ghostofskywalker]

🎃 just adopted a cat today so I need Obi-Wan meeting reader's tooka for the first time thank you goodnight 🙏🙏

this is such a cute idea for a fic!! hope you enjoy, and i hope your new friend is settling in well <3

You had meant to tell Obi-Wan about the new addition to your household, but when he lived life on the front lines of a war and you lived yours in the busy Republic Senate, sometimes you didn’t get to speak to him for as long as you would have liked. 

Of course, if you had known he was dropping by for a visit you would have made a point to warn him, so the fact that this happened in the first place was partially on him, if you were being honest. 

Meiloorun (or Mei for short) was extraordinarily friendly, so you were not surprised in the least when you stepped into your apartment after the Senate concluded for the day to find your lover on the couch with your tooka splayed across his laps, purring like a speeder engine while he gently pet her head. 

Or at least, she was purring until Obi-Wan realized you were home. He instinctively stood up as you walked in, forgetting about the creature on his lap and sending her careening onto the (very soft) carpeted floor. “You’re here,” you said, immediately dropping the bags in your hand and not even caring to check whether you closed the door behind you or not. 

“I wanted to surprise you,” he responded, rushing over to throw his arms around you and pull you into a soft kiss. Your knees buckled a little as his lips met yours, and you began to lose yourself in this moment. 

Well, until Mei realized what was happening of course, and she put her high pitched voice to use. “You didn’t tell me you had gotten a tooka,” he said with a smile on his face. 

“Yeah, things have been crazy lately, and you didn’t tell me you were coming.” 

“It jumped on me when I walked in,” he deadpanned, and an image of your Jedi General boyfriend stopping in his tracks as he was pounced on by a creature that was mostly made of fluff made you smile. 

You laughed. “In a good way or a bad way?” Mei didn’t seem like she had marked Obi-Wan as an enemy, but you wanted to make sure.

“What?” 

“If I told you that I had gotten her to protect the apartment when I wasn’t here, would that make sense?” 

Now it was Obi-Wan’s turn to laugh. “Considering the way she warmed up to me immediately, I’d say if you’re looking for protection you might want to consider a massif. Or a meaner tooka.”

You smiled, pulling away from Obi-Wan to reach down and pet Mei, who had begun to butt her head against your legs. “I think I’ll take my chances with her for now,” you said. “Maybe she could tell how much I love you and knew not to attack.” 

Obi-Wan smiled. You could tell he wasn’t even a little bit convinced, but you didn’t care one bit, because your family was all right here. 

[taska-rokanh]

Good Night (Platonic Obi-Wan Kenobi x Padawan!Reader)

As Obi-wan Kenobi's padawan, your life was never short on adventure. Unfortunately, that meant you were always short on sleep. You were pretty sure the bearded man could see that when he asked you to stay on the ship while he, Anakin, and Ahsoka went ahead on the recon mission.

You tried to stay awake, knowing that despite the low impact of the task, it was all too important when someone or something actually did try to take or destroy the ship.

You only closed your eyes for a moment, and when you opened them again, you were against Anakin's chest, being carried to the quarters that, for the time being, you were sharing with your fellow Padawan.

You mumbled something that was probably supposed to come out as, "Master?" It sounded more formless than that, you were sure.

"Shh," he said quietly. "Ahsoka's already asleep. I was trying not to wake you."

"Thanks," you whispered once he set you down, feeling the tension in your neck from falling asleep in your chair release.

"No problem, kid. Sweet dreams."

It was only a few minutes before you heard Obi-wan's light footsteps announce his presence.

He walked over to Ahsoka's bunk first, seeming to check her for injuries once again. The mission must've been more dangerous than they'd been expecting.

"Oh, Padawan," he gave a quiet sigh as he settled down by your bedside. "You know, sometimes I wonder if I go... too easy on you."

He thought you were already asleep.

"But, as much as I hate to admit it, I'm glad you weren't with us this time," Obi-wan whispered. "It was nothing serious, nothing to worry about now, but there was one moment, where Ahsoka--oh, my heart nearly stopped. I can't imagine what it would be like if I had both of you to be worrying about.

"And I know you'll have to be in danger plenty before this war is over... ha, Qui-gon would not have had a problem with this," he shook his head, laughing faintly at himself. "For Forcesake, I didn't even have this problem with Anakin. I wasn't raising him in the middle of a war."

He sighed again. "Anyway, it doesn't matter. This is something I have to figure out on my own," he rubbed a hand across his beard before leaning over and pressing a light kiss to your cheek. "Sleep well, my dear. See you in the morning."

[am-i-obsessed---maybe]

Nonverbal reader x Obi Wan Kenobi

let's get some things straight first. I am a neurodivergent person who occasionally gets to points where I can't communicate verbally. No idea why. I call this being non verbal because I don't know what else to call it.

This fic is based on my own experience and my own need for comfort. If you don't like it, don't read.

Maybe it was the fact that you couldn't remember your life before them but you couldn't imagine a life outside of the Jedi order.

You'd grown up surrounded by love and support from your creche-mates and teachers and eventually your master and you knew knew not to that for granted— or at least you knew now.

When you were a young padawan going out on assignments with your master and you would become nonverbal you didn't think much of it. It been a part of your life since you could remember but the galaxy at large wasn't as aware or accepting. Sometimes when you'd suddenly switch to Galactic Basic Sign would freak people out sometimes. Not everyone could wrap their heads around why you didn't always have the ability to speak. Your master would tell you to heed them no mind. He would say that they were simply small minded and they were.

As you grew into a Jedi knight this bothered you less. But not always being able to communicate as easily as you wanted still bothered you.

You sat outside the temple trying to concentrate on your meditation. You'd been feeling blocked lately and didn't know how to fix it. Soon your eyebrows furrowed and you kicked out of the sitting position you were meditating in. This wasn't working. "Something wrong?" An elegant voice asked and Obi Wan sat beside you, his buzzed hair and padawan brain flowing slightly in the gentle breeze.

You nodded and he could feel you project your frustrations out into the force.

"Nonverbal?" He asked and you once again nodded.

"Did something happen? perhaps I could help" He insisted but you shook your head. Instead slumping your body into his.

I'm tired. You signed as your face fell into his shoulder and he chuckled.

"Did you sleep enough?" He asked and you nodded.

"Eat something?" He asked and you nodded. again.

"Then what is wrong?" He asked and you sign the words force block in the simplest of terms. You'd been doing so well it had been a while since you last had to use Galactic sign and you had gotten a bit rusty.

"Ahh" He hummed and took you hand in his.

"Maybe if we meditate together it would help" He suggested but you rolled your eyes.

"Humor me, please?" He asked and you exhaled tiredly. Fine. You'd try one more time.

"Don't worry darling, everything will be alright. We'll find it" He said

[betzabobababi]

𝙱𝚎𝚌𝚊𝚞𝚜𝚎 𝙾𝚏 𝙻𝚘𝚟𝚎

Welcome! This is the first drabble of my Cancer free Celebration and the first drabble of the month! If you enjoy please consider to like and reblog, it is greatly appreciated and it helps for other people to see my work! (Don't repost without permission or plagiarize)

Warning: character death-siblings death...lmk if I missed any (prob did) (also I tried my best to make this gender neutral lmk if I failed)

Pairings: Anakin x GNsibling!reader

Type: Angst (sorta?)

Summary: Anakin turns into Darth Vader trying to save his twin from a deadly illness

Listen to: TV by Jmusikk on youtube

Sometimes, in trying to fix something, you only make it worse. And sometimes it leads to your own demise.

.

.

.

In trying to save someone's life sometimes you forget to save yours as well. But sometimes to the “savior”, it doesn't matter. Because the person's life is so worth saving, saving yourself is no longer important.

.

.

.

Anakin only had a tiny amount of people he trusted. Within that amount you were his number one. His twin, his own flesh and blood. His other half. Anakin loved you with all his soul. With every ounce of the force he carried. He would die for you, and you for him. 

Being twins meant having each other's back. It meant being there for each other no matter what. Through thick and thin. From the core of earth to the heavens itself. Without hesitation. Without a limit. It's a pact. A part both siblings play, forever, all because of love.

  You were plagued with a disease no one knew how to cure. Maker, no one even knew what it was. Nevertheless, Anakin being the stubborn boy he was raised to be, he was hell bent on figuring out how to cure your illness. 

That's how he found himself talking to palpatine. Seeking out his help. Seeking out his knowledge in the force. Believing he could help save you. The bare lies Palpatine fed Anakin, led him to kill innocent jedi younglings. They led him to choke his expecting wife. Hurting the love of his life and his future child. The ugly repulsive lies led him to fight his master. Led him to turn to the darkside. And in the end, because of Palpatine's repulsive lies, only left him with a heart in pieces.

All he had, a secret bride, a hidden future child, a family. All gone. In the end the things he had left were a heart shattered into oblivion, a dead wife, and a long, lonely path down the dark side. Alone.

All because of a simple emotion. 

𝐿𝑜𝓋𝑒.

Tags:

@popfishjr @scarthefangirl @book-place

[leighsartworks216]

I Forgive You

Obi-Wan Kenobi x gn!reader

This is 100 percent self-indulgent. I barely looked at lore or timelines (a huge weight off my back tbh bc I ALWAYS tear my hair out over everything being 100% compliant always) so if none of this works that's too bad

Warnings: mentions of blood, mentions of a dead body, hurt/comfort??, some fluff, possibly OOC bc I didn't rewatch the prequels to get a feeling for their personalities, mixed POVs (switches between reader (Second POV/"you/yours") and Obi (Third POV/"they/them"))

Word Count: 3982 (YOOOO)

Masterlist

Tag List Form

The caverns were dark and damp. The skittering of rodents filled the dark cravesses, impossible to see without the aid of a light. Obi-Wan watched as his padawan, Anakin, jumped away from the wall, searching the floor for whatever just crawled over his boots.

The Jedi-in-training huffed. “Any ideas on getting out of here?” He gestured to the metal bars containing them. Years of being dripped on by stalactites crusted the metal over with solid mineral deposits. Despite this, they were still strong, with no sign of deterioration.

Obi-Wan looked around. Behind them - a large stone wall. The other three sides - solid prison bars. He frowned at the skeleton in the corner.

“Get your slimy hands off me!”

All attention was directed toward the shout. It echoed down the labyrinthine corridors. This base was expansive… A loud thud, followed by a growl of contempt. Around the corner, a hulking 4-armed creature dragged a body. The Jedi stepped back as it got closer.

The creature, pale with dark eyes and a long mouth full of teeth, snarled at them. It pulled out a key and unlocked the heavy door. With barely any effort, the body was thrown inside.

The first thing Obi-Wan noticed was their helmet. It was undoubtedly Mandalorian, but the rest of their outfit was unfit for a Mandalorian. Rather than a heavy suit of armor, suited to the war-like attitude of the clan, they were in robes not dissimilar to the Jedi’s. The glass visor had a crack down it.

The person struggled to their hands and knees. Before the creature could shut the door, however, the Mandalorian lunged and pushed the beast back. It growled - almost screamed - in a horrific manner. Its lower limbs grabbed their arms and shoved them back, before it reeled back and in quick succession kicked their stomach and their visor. The stranger laid on the floor, groaning in pain, as the creature slammed the cell shut. Obi-Wan did his best to avoid the gut-wrenching look it threw their way before it shuffled off into the dark tunnels once more.

The crack splintered out now, creating an intricate web along the visor of the helmet. Obi-Wan was the first to offer assistance.

-

“Are you alright?”

You swallowed down the rising bile in your throat. Pain emanated from your stomach and your face. Already, you could feel warmth oozing from your nose.

Don’t panic. Deep breath. Did it break anything?

You pressed a hand to your ribs, feeling for any pain. No. It only came from your abdomen, which no doubt was turning black and blue as you laid there.

The blood.

You opened your eyes. It was harder to see now, as the glass cracked dangerously, but it would do. A face hovered over you. His brows were furrowed with concern and confusion. He looked… familiar.

No time.

With a groan, you pushed yourself to a sit. The blood changed course from flowing down your cheeks to fall down your chin. So it was a lot then.

You turned your attention to the other prisoners. The one who had been leaning over you now sat back in a kneel, watching you carefully. You hated the distrust that colored those blue irises. The other stood back further, glancing from his Master to you. His face was twisted with suspicion. You did not linger long on the carcass in the corner, or its rictus grin.

“Are you alright?” the man asked again.

“I’m bleeding.” The helmet muffled your voice, but if you pitched your voice down an octave, who would notice? “Can you turn around?”

“Master,” the dark-haired jumped in, just waiting for any reason to share his distrust with Obi-Wan.

But those blue eyes were wiser and more caring than any skepticism. He stood and backed away toward the other. Without removing his eyes off you, he whispered to his padawan. “It’s their code.”

The other man leaned in to whisper - rather angrily and not-so-quietly. “They could attack us. We have no reason to-”

“I won’t,” you cut in. The dark-haired one fixed a glare on you. You didn’t look at him, though. Your eyes were set firmly on Obi-Wan, whose face had yet to relax. “When it kicked my helmet, it hit my nose. I just need a moment to clean the blood.

“Besides,” you looked to the padawan, not that they could tell under your helmet, “I’m already breaking the code by removing my helmet with you here. Why risk any more of my honor?”

Silent, the padawan turned to his Master. Obi-Wan continued to study you. The blood touched your lips, seeping between the cracks to taint your mouth with iron.

-

After a moment, he nodded. He had no other choice but to trust them at their word. Obi-Wan turned to Anakin and placed a hand on his shoulder, guiding him to turn around with him.

“Thank you.”

The Jedi were left to staring through the bars into the darkness, and listening as the stranger removed their helmet. There was a faint curse, then fabric ripping. Obi-Wan closed his eyes and listened.

Somehow, though he could not place it, the voice sounded familiar. Maybe it just reminded him of someone else, but he could’ve sworn…

His face hardened. There was no time to linger on the past. They needed to get out of here, one way or another. Preferably without getting cornered in the labyrinth by any of those creatures. And preferably with their lightsabers.

The Mandalorian threw a strange wrench into the mix, too. There was no telling if they were on the Republic’s side, or if they were just biding their time until they got their own weapons back to attack. Could they trust this stranger in their escape? Why was the Mandalorian here in the first place?

He was pulled back from his mind as dirt shuffled behind them.

-

You sighed as you pulled your helmet back on. The humid air of the cave was of little relief from the stuffy headgear, but at least your nose had stopped bleeding. At least it wasn’t broken. You used the bars as a support to help you to your feet.

“You can look now.”

The padawan didn’t seem as tense when he turned and saw you as far across the cell as possible. He was on edge, though. Obi-Wan still looked confused, but his determination won out above all else.

“What’s your name?” he asked.

It was the simplest question in the world, but it still had you scrambling for a suitable alias. You didn’t want him to know quite yet.

“Vros,” you lied. “And yours?”

Neither of them were suspicious with the fake name, any more so than they were your presence. “My name is Obi-Wan Kenobi, and this is my padawan, Anakin.”

You nodded respectfully.

“Do you have any ideas how to get out of here?” Obi-Wan asked.

You grinned, though they could not see it. “Just use the key and walk right out,” you spoke with a teasing lilt.

Anakin didn’t enjoy the playfulness. “How?” He gestured to the solid wall and metal bars. “We’re trapped on all sides, with no way of even getting a key. How do you propose we just stroll on out of here?”

You lifted up the key. It was as rough and crusted over as the bars. Their faces fell from shock and, perhaps, fear. It was hard to tell. “I snagged it off the guard, before he kicked me down.”

Obi-Wan stepped forward. “Do you know how to get through these tunnels?”

You looked out the bars, into the pitch dark. “Not really, but I have faith.”

-

Faith was an unnatural word to hear coming from a Mandalorian. As far as he knew, Mandalorians relied on their guns more than they relied on any notion of belief. Honor above all else, and guns above that. Though, he couldn’t say he was an expert in their culture.

Vros leaned against the bars, working carefully as they reached through and used the oddly-shaped key to unlock the cell. With a click, it was unlocked. Slowly, they pushed open the door. It creaked, and they stopped to listen for guards. And then they pushed it further open. It creaked, and they waited once more. Once it was wide enough, they slipped through and held it open for him and Anakin to slip through. They left the cell open, but removed the key, tucking it away in a fold of their clothes.

“You’re Jedi, right?” they whispered, but did not wait for a response. “Can you sense your lightsabers? It would lead us in the right direction.”

Now wasn’t the time to ask how Vros knew they were Jedi. While Obi-Wan brushed it off, instead focusing on the pull of his lightsaber through the darkness, Anakin looked sideways at the Mandalorian.

“This way,” Obi-Wan whispered. He crouched down and walked with light steps close to the walls as he led the way. Anakin would not go until Vros did, following behind and keeping his eye on the stranger between them.

-

You followed close behind. Unable to see any further than Obi-Wan, you were stuck to trusting blind faith that you were going the right way. You winced every time your boots scraped against the loose dirt a little louder than you’d like. Your heart pounded against your chest, just waiting for something to step out of the shadows.

Obi-Wan came to a stop, pressing his entire body against the rock wall. Anakin did the same. You stepped in front of Obi-Wan, just far enough to peer around the corner he stopped at. The Jedi Master watched as you stared hard into the darkness through your helmet. And then you were quickly stepping back, falling against the wall right between him and his padawan.

Footsteps.

Your heart matched the pattern of the feet dragging through the dirt. They got closer. Closer. You could hear the disgusting gurgling sounds of the creature, standing just around the corner. They stopped.

You all held your breaths.

And waited.

And waited…

They began retreating back in the direction they came. You all waited a moment longer before it felt safe to breathe again.

Obi-Wan glanced around the corner, and continued guiding you into the gloom. Oh the things you would do for a torch.

-

The tug was closer now. Through a wall or a door. But he couldn’t pinpoint which way he needed to go to reach it. The crossroads waited for a decision. Continue forward the way they’d been going? Left? Right? He just knew there was no going back.

His brows pulled tight together as he tried to pinpoint where the Force was leading him.

And then Vros was stepping out ahead again. They went no further than the edge of the wall, peering forward, then left. In the distance, feet marched along set paths.

They looked right. All the halls, as far as they could tell in the murk, were identical. But one must be the right path. If Obi-Wan could just-

Vros stepped silently to the other wall. They peered around the corner, searching for some invisible thing. Anakin scooted up right beside his Master. They both shared a look.

The Mandalorian turned back to them and nodded down the right path. They didn’t wait to be sure the Jedi would follow before slipping into the shadows and down the hall. Mentally cursing, Obi-Wan and Anakin quickly moved to follow behind.

They seemed very sure of themself as they guided the Jedi down two more corridors. It was as though they were being pulled toward something. That thought left a strange feeling in Obi-Wan’s gut.

And then there was light. Dim, but definitely there. A large stone door that wasn’t fully sealed on all sides was all that stood between them and freedom.

-

So your senses were right, the exit was this way. You ran a hand along the reddish stone, feeling for any sort of mechanism that would open it. Alas, there was nothing. The creatures probably pushed it open with their brutish strength, if they ever left these tunnels, that is.

You pressed your shoulder against an edge of the door that had slightly more light shining through the crack, and pushed.

“What about our lightsabers?”

You stopped, attention drawn to the padawan. He looked between Obi-Wan and you, torn between freedom and the Order. Obi-Wan didn’t seem any less torn. He peered back into the gloom, the all-consuming darkness. Somewhere in there, his saber called to him, just as yours did.

“I can go back and get them,” you whispered.

“And why should we trust you not to run off with them? Or just kill us?”

Anakin was a veritable brick wall. You huffed indignantly, trying to meet Obi-Wan’s eyes even through your cracked visor. “It will be easier for just one of us to sneak through than all three.”

Obi-Wan wasn’t so easily swayed this time. “Then two of us will go.”

You bit back your frustration as he turned to his padawan. “Try to get this door open. If we’re not back in 10 minutes, don’t do anything stupid, just get yourself to safety and contact the Counsel.”

He looked back at you, nodding his head for you to lead. You tried to bite back your guilt as you pressed back through the dark.

You back-tracked slightly. You could feel the separate forces that pulled you - one toward the exit, and the other in the direction you needed to go.

You peered around a corner, listened, and then went down corridor after corridor. The further you went, the closer to the heart of the maze, and the more footsteps surrounded you. You reached an intersection and stopped, waiting.

You could feel it. Right in front of you was a creature. It stood right in the middle of the crossroads. You couldn’t risk being seen. Even though it was dark for you, no doubt the creatures had adapted to the inky black they lived in.

A hand grabbed your wrist, a warning. Obi-Wan had sensed the creature, too. He tugged, starting to head back to find another way around, but you stopped him. He watched, entranced, as you held a hand to his chest to keep him against the wall. You were studying your surroundings and your options. He felt it as much as you that the sabers were just across from you. Calling to you. Calling for you.

You removed your hand from his chest and slowly, slowly pulled the key from your robes. As much as you dared, you peeked around the corner. A beat, a breath, and you were throwing the key down the left hall. The creature made an undignified snorting-wail as it followed the sound, eagerly chasing the disturbance.

Your hand found his arm now as you dragged him in a semi-circle through the intersection to the next hall. You pushed him ahead as you leaned against the wall, listening for the creature. It was far enough now that it wouldn’t immediately sense or see you. But the distraction would definitely raise the alarm. You had to be quick now.

Obi-Wan tapped your arm to get your attention before ducking into a sideroom. The room was a little bigger than your cell, though not by much. Along the walls were shelves full of bins carved from metal. All of them were full of odd trinkets, torn clothes, and scary-looking weapons.

Somewhere in here, your lightsaber was waiting.

Obi-Wan was tugged toward a bin at the bottom of the wall. He knelt down and pulled it out. Underneath a scrap of unrecognizable cloth was his saber. Relief flooded him as he attached it to his belt.

You pulled out a box on a higher shelf, right at eye level. You had to set it on the floor just to see what was inside. An arsenal of one-handed phasers were thrown carelessly inside, all lacking power. Buried beneath the defunct guns were two lightsabers. One you immediately recognized as yours and you wasted no time tucking it into your robes. The other was foreign to you.

“Is this one Anakin’s?” You held the weapon out to him. He recognized the design immediately. But his eyes found their way down to the hilt sticking out of your clothes. He stilled.

“Is that one yours?” It was accusatory. There was only one Mandalorian to become a Jedi. You were not it. “Or did you find it here?”

A benefit of the doubt. But the collapse of trust had already happened. You said nothing - what could you say? You held out Anakin’s lightsaber further, silently urging him to take it.

Blue eyes stared through your visor, searching for an answer within your facelessness. All he saw was his cracked reflection.

A cry echoed through the halls. It was inhuman. Your hand immediately grabbed your lightsaber, prepared to defend yourself at the drop of a hat. Obi-Wan took Anakin’s saber and tucked it away.

A cacophony of feet stormed their way through the halls, heading straight for you. If you didn’t move now, you’d be cornered here. This was not how you would die.

-

Obi-Wan led the way through the dark halls. His lightsaber provided enough light to help him along. The creatures were following right behind.

Loose dirt beneath his feet made him slide around the next corner and hit his shoulder into the wall. Vros accounted for the momentum and took the lead. They pulled him by the front of his robes off the wall and into step behind them. The exit was only a few turns away.

But the steps and the gurgling started coming from the side.

The orange light of dual suns peeked around the corner. Freedom.

Vros looked over their shoulder. Obi-Wan did, too. The creatures, all four arms and pale skin, long mouths frothing with drool, were right there. Not just behind them. As they passed an intersection, two more hordes came from the left and right. The only open path was ahead.

In a flash, Obi-Wan was pulled once again to the front. Vros slid in the dirt, stopping, and held up their lightsaber. Its yellow light lit up the sickly faces of the creatures. They shouted over their shoulder as they faced the swarm head on.

“Get out of here!”

“You can’t fight them all on your own!” Obi-Wan’s chest felt tight. He was torn in two directions. Did he help this strange Mandalorian, who was all but sacrificing themself for his own survival? Or did he escape with his life, alone, meet up with Anakin, and walk away as if none of this happened? “I’ll stay!”

“Just go!”

As the brutal arms swung, attacking wildly, the stranger did not give up any ground. In a display almost beautiful to witness, they defended their own. They didn’t senselessly murder. No. They used the light from their saber to frighten the beasts back into the darkness. They threw pointed kicks meant to stun or surprise their opponent. They ducked to avoid a heavy blow, but caught another one in an upper-cut to their chin. Their helmet flew off.

That face…

Determined eyes burned into his own, if only for a millisecond.

“Go, Obi-Wan!” 

That voice… He knew it was familiar.

And then a foot planet itself against his chest, sending him backward toward the exit. The blow did not hurt as bad as it should have. Perhaps it was shock.

“Go already!” Their cry was visceral. A desperate last plea to leave, get out of here, save yourself.

Snapped back to his senses, he picked himself back up. It felt wrong to leave you there, but… What choice did he have?

He ran out into the bright daylight. Anakin was leaning against the wall, concern and boredom mixing together, replaced entirely with confusion as his Master rushed out of the tunnels.

“Master?” He rushed over, holding Obi-Wan by his arms to support him as the man rubbed at the center of his chest. “What happened? Where’s Vros?”

The padawan had never seen Obi-Wan so speechless. All he could do was shake his head and stare at the door. Half of him wanted to rush back inside, stuck to your side as he used to always be. But the other half told him to wait. See what happened. It was like a morbid little voice telling him to watch and see if you survived.

Sure enough, moments later, you were backing out of the door, saber still held in front of you defensively. The creatures screeched and whined at the bright sun, slinking backwards into the safety of their dark caves. Once you were clear of the path of the door, you nodded toward it.

“Anakin, Obi-Wan, close the door.”

Anakin rushed to the task. Obi-Wan was awestruck staring at you. You glanced over your shoulder for just a second, and he was pulled back into the present. The combined strength of both men had the stone door shut in no time. They watched as your shoulders relaxed, and you tucked your deactivated lightsaber back into your robes.

They were gray. He hadn’t noticed before - it was too dark to really tell. But sure enough, you were donned in all gray Jedi robes.

“You’re a Gray Jedi…” It came out in a breath. It was full of mixed emotions. Relief, confusion, guilt, solace. You couldn’t tell how he really felt about the revelation.

You nodded.

“Why didn’t you say anything?” He stood arms length from you. His eyes scanned you over. They lingered on your nose, still tinted from blood. They glanced quickly over your attire before he gulped and brought himself back to your eyes. He looked… forlorn. “I looked for you. Everywhere. Why did you leave?”

It was hard to face the consequences of your choices when his eyes were so blue. You stared at his shoulder instead.

“I had to. I heard about Qui-Gon and I…” At the mention of his old Master’s name, he bristled. You bit the inside of your cheek. “I didn’t agree with the rules of the Counsel. I asked to leave. I swore I wouldn’t join the Dark Side, but I couldn’t continue down that path, following rules I didn’t truly believe in.”

He stepped forward. “And you didn’t think to say goodbye?”

You took a deep breath. “I thought… I didn’t want you to hate me for going against the Order.”

“Hate you?” He grabbed you by the shoulders, jostling you slightly and ducking down to meet your eyes. “Y/N, I loved you. And then you left without a word and I thought-” He whispered, as if he didn’t want to speak the words into existence, “I thought you were dead.”

His eyes were watery. Like this, on the verge of tears, they looked like miniature oceans. The guilt in your chest fell through your stomach. The weight hit the bottom of your world and sent cracks through the foundation. You wrapped your arms around him, pressing your face into his neck. He did much the same, fingers gripping onto the fabric of your clothes as though you would slip through his fingers as nothing more than wisps of sand.

“I’m so glad you’re alive,” he breathed.

“I’m sorry,” you croaked.

He shook his head, burying his face further into the crook of your shoulder. “No, please,” he squeezed you tighter to him, “don’t. You’re here. That’s more than enough.”

Wet, hot tears mixed into each of your shoulders’. Neither of you cared.

You sniffled. “I’m sorry I kicked you.”

He laughed. Maker, it was so good to hear him laugh again. Through tears, you smiled. “I forgive you.”

For everything.

A whisper, so quiet he almost missed it. “I loved you, too.”

I still love you.

---

Tag List:

@weasleytwins-41

[tragedybunny]

Sparring Match - Obi-Wan Kenobi x Gender Neutral Reader

You've been a Padawan for some time. No longer even close to the age of a youngling, you're technically an adult, even if you're still waiting for Knighthood. Despite feeling as though it will teach you nothing, you've been instructed to attend a lightsaber sparring session between two Knights. Being the dutiful student, you roll your eyes behind your Master's back and promise to go.

When you arrive, the room is crowded with other Padawans and to your horror, some Initiates. Quickly, you find a group closer to your own age, and join their circle. Sadly, only a couple you know well, the rest of your friends already having passed their trials and moving beyond you.

When the Knights finally enter, a male human and female Twi'lek. The Twi'lek begins to give an introduction, but you can't hear a word she's saying, you attention rapt by the man standing unassumingly to the side, Obi-Wan Kenobi. Ever since the day you first encountered him in the Temple Gardens he's occupied a space in your mind, filling your thoughts with the type of fantasies you're not even sure Jedi are allowed.

"I hope you will all learn a lot." The unknown Knight stops speaking, and you feel yourself blushing, realizing you have no idea what's happening. Thankfully none of the others in your group seem to have noticed. As the demonstration begins, your eyes ignore the saber technique, the positioning of bodies, the timing of strikes, in favor of watching Obi-Wan alone. There's a practiced grace in every move he makes, and a strength that radiates from controlled precision. The enticing outline of taut muscles visible beneath his garments leaves your pulse pounding.

Each minute is like a symphony for you, a masterful painting come to life. Everyone in the room disappears, and it's just you and the most beautiful Jedi Knight you've ever known. Time passes too quickly though, and soon the match ceases. Though it leaves you with another moment to treasure in your memories, him, sweaty, hair disheveled, skin flushed with exertion, breathing rapidly.

You continue to stare, mesmerized, feeling the stirring of want in your body. Deep blue eyes look up, seeming to pierce through the crowd, and by some terrible coincidence find you. For a moment your gaze locks with his, and you know he knows your secret musings, and you wish you could disappear. Until you see the ghost of a smile cross his features. Blood rushing in your ears, your skin now burning with embarrassment, you turn and flee, paying no mind to the questioning stares that follow.

[tatooinebarnes]

As It Was - Obi-Wan Kenobi (Part 1)

Obi-Wan Kenobi x Gender Neutral Original Character

Read on AO3

Word Count: 10.5k

Warnings: cursing, canon typical violence

Summary: Obi-Wan Kenobi and Cecil Palmarin have known each other since childhood. and for as long as they can remember they've been pushing down the feelings of affection that always seem to be present between them. But war changes people. And war changes perceptions on what risks you're willing to take.

Gender Neutral Original Character written from their POV. No y/n. Minor allusions to OC presenting as/being socialized as fem. But mostly just their POV.

Asexual Spectrum OC and Obi-Wan

Begins in the Clone Wars, ends in A New Hope

Part 1 (Chapters 1-7)

CH. 1 - Home

Back-to-back with Obi-Wan while reflecting blaster shots had begun to feel like a familiar task, something I did as easy as lacing up my boots rather than a fight for my life. 

Perhaps it’s an exaggeration to say that we were fighting for our lives; this Separatist base was ill-prepared to deter the attack of two Jedi and a host of Republic forces and were all but holding the door open for us. The only reason Obi-wan and I were here was to assure that the intel we were seeking was delivered into the hands of the Jedi Council as quickly as possible. Frankly, we were unneeded. 

And I wished they had let us stay behind because the falling snow was already piling halfway up my shins and the temperature was steadily dropping as we ventured closer to the base’s main entrance. My hair had broken loose of its tie and was blowing wildly around my face being anything but helpful in deflecting blaster fire. I cursed myself for not making time to do up the braids again before this mission. 

The snow fell slowly, a thick blanket muffling the sounds of battle and making everything glow eerily under the blaze of our lightsabers.  Finally the blaster fire slowed and I could see our forces setting charges on the main doors. I lowered my saber, letting it fall to my side and click off, breathing hard. Obi-Wan did the same, pushing the long hair I had been begging him to let me trim out of his face. 

“Something is wrong,” Obi-Wan said suddenly, his body going rigid as he jumped back into a defensive stance. 

I reached out and could feel it too, a sudden shift in the Force, a dark presence that had been slyly concealing itself. At the same moment, the charges set on the base’s doors went off, spraying debris and clouding the air. Blaster fire emitted from the now gaping hole and as our own forces returned fire a red saber lit up within the smoke.

“Ventress,” I said definitely. It was rumored she was in this system but no one had thought she would be on this planet, let alone this little outpost. 

“Unfortunately,” Obi-Wan muttered, “this just got a whole lot more complicated.”

“You don’t say?” I said, rolling my eyes before refocusing on where Ventress’s slim figure was emerging from the cloud of debris. 

Even from afar, I could see Ventress was pink in the face and feel her aversion to this god-forsaken ice planet. Nobody wanted to be here, least of all the foreboding periwinkle woman. On that subject I agreed with her; this was far too cold a place to call inhabitable. 

“Cecil-” Obi-wan started, his tone annoyed.

“Don’t ‘Cecil’ me, Obi-Wan,” I said badly impersonating him, my own accent fading poorly when I tried to conceal it, “I am not Anakin. Or Ahsoka. You can’t scold me for sassing you. How many times must I remind you of that?”

“You are insufferable,” Obi-Wan said, humor creeping into his voice and he spared a glance at me, eyes crinkling. 

Ventress had spotted us almost immediately and I could feel her anger growing. I had crossed her path only once before and that occasion had resulted in the death of far too many clones and a saber burn across my forearms. But today, she was mad.  

She met us with smashing hacks, lightsaber crackling as anger rolled off her in waves, seething in a way that seemed to surprise even Obi-Wan. But he recovered quickly, easily retaliating against her attacks, the two of us soon gaining the upper hand. 

I had the feeling that the entire compound had stopped to watch; two Jedi carefully navigating an enraged Sith, all three stumbling through the growing snow drifts. The more we gained control the madder she became, her attacks sloppy but annoyingly effective. She was moving so fast that even with our combined attack everything was beginning to blur, only our trust in the Force keeping us from falling beneath the scarlet blade. But it was only a matter of time before one of us made a mistake. 

The first mistake was Ventress’s - leaving her side unguarded - earning her deep, sizzling mark from Obi-Wan. But the second mistake was mine - assuming that she would recoil instead of attack - a mistake which sent me flying across the compound, the smell of burning flesh accompanying me. 

“Cecil!” I heard Obi-Wan’s voice yell, but knew nothing else but a searing pain along my right side. 

–

I woke from the memory gasping, sitting up so fast I almost knocked my head on the bunk above me. Ahsoka was staring at me, bent to my level and grasping my hands.

“Are you okay?” she asked, her voice anxious.

Unconsciously I reached up to where what was left of my ear tingled, tracing the scar of the saber burn down my neck to where it disappeared beneath my tunic. My other hand automatically reached up to feel my other ear, as if it would disappear without my noticing.

“Another nightmare Master Palmarin?” 

“Yes,” I said, still unable to fully catch my breath and unwilling to lie to her, “the same one as always. I doubt it will ever go away.”

Her gaze softened, “It’s only been four and a half months. The burn is barely even healed.” 

I nodded but did not share her sentiment. A series of long soaks in a bacta tank had healed the wound enough that it did not hinder my movement much and I could hide that half my ear was missing, but the pink scar still stood out against my dark skin, painfully obvious anytime I caught a passing reflection of myself. I wondered if it would ever really fade to something that only I could see instead of being the glaring reminder that I had almost died, Ventress had escaped and that the whole mission had failed because of my mistake. 

Ahsoka did not press any further but gave my hands a squeeze as she got up and headed back to the cockpit, “We’re coming in on the rendezvous point. Anakin requested we join them on the planet’s surface instead of boarding their cruiser to transfer the supplies since they’d have to bring it down anyway.” 

I nodded and followed her, eternally thanking the gods that Anakin’s Padawan was responsible beyond her years and could be trusted to pilot the cargo ship while her superior had nightmares about things they should not fear. 

“I’m not going to lie Master Palmarin,” Ahsoka said without looking at me as she guided the ship onto the landing pad “You don’t look so good. Are you sure you should be doing all this with that wound?”

“I’m sure,” I replied, refusing to dwell on the way I could see that my reflection in the windshield looked tired, my dark complexion lacking its usual glow. Instead, I let a smile form as my gaze caught on two familiar robed figures on the landing pad, the bearded one’s grin visible from afar.

–

“General Palmarin. Commander Tano,” a trooper saluted us as we exited the ship, “Good to see you both again.”

I nodded in return, not recognizing his identification number and did not have time to ask his name before being enveloped in a bone crushing hug. To my own dismay, I did not conceal my flinch in pain well enough and Obi-Wan immediately retracted his grip, holding me at arm’s length looking immensely guilty.

“Cecil I’m so sorry- I keep forgetting-” he started.

“It’s alright. It’s still just a little tender sometimes,” I said, smiling widely at him, feeling giddy to see that ever-present amusement in his expression. He always seemed to be looking at me like we were sharing a personal and deeply hilarious joke, a gaze that never quite left me. 

Obi-Wan almost unconsciously reached up to tuck one of my long braids behind my still existent ear but quickly retracted his hand looking embarrassed. 

“It’s good to see you,” I smiled, pushing my feeling of joy at him through the Force. He smiled wider this time and wrapped me in another short hug.

Anakin broke in across his former Master’s light grip, his hug less invasive than Obi-Wan’s but genuine never-the-less, “I hope you’re ready to give Snips back because I am getting tired of taking orders from General Serious-Business-Only.”

I chuckled and caught Obi-Wan’s eye as he frowned, only making me laugh harder, “I’m sure General Serious-Business-Only could find some excuse to lighten up.”

Anakin grinned wickedly, the sort of grin that told me he already had something up his sleeve and he just needed someone of authority to egg him on. Sometimes I wondered why he was allowed to have a Padawan. 

“The High Council of this planet is hosting a celebration tonight in thanks for you dropping medical supplies and our involvement in keeping their planet ‘Separitist free.’ How about staying for the night instead of leaving now?”

“Anakin-” Obi-Wan started, the signature scolding tone entering his voice.

“Come on Master, it will be FUN,” Anakin continued.

When Obi-Wan did not have an immediate comeback Anakin nodded curtly, bouncing on his toes, “it’s been decided then! We’re staying for the night. Come on Snips, let’s go join the party.”

We watched them go, Obi-Wan frowning with his arms crossed.

“It really won’t hurt to stay the night,” I said, nudging him in the ribs, “Ahsoka hasn’t slept since we left Endor. She deserves a good rest.”

“That goes for you too,” Obi-Wan smiled, “Get some good sleep.”

Before I could respond, Anakin's voice crackled over Obi-Wan’s comm link, “And don’t you two even think of going to bed early. Tonight is for celebration.”

“Anakin-” Obi-Wan started in the same exasperated voice.

“And yes, I promise to get Ahsoka to bed at a reasonable hour. She needs the sleep. But also a little fun in her life. And so do you.”

I laughed at the expression on Obi-Wan’s face, “We’re at war, Anakin.”

“Yes I know Master, that’s why you have to take any opportunity you can get.”

Obi-Wan rolled his eyes again and this time I couldn’t resist joining him.

–

The four of us were perched on barstools, crammed around a small hightopped table clearly not meant to have four Jedi leaning on it, especially with the way Anakin kept excitedly gesturing. The celebration was in full swing around us, the room a blur of pale blue-skinned natives dancing, eating and conversing as we remained the only stationary point. 

“You know,” Anakin started, letting his glass hit the table a little too hard. “I am really a very responsible teacher. I never let Ahsoka do anything I think she can’t handle.”

Obi-Wan raised an eyebrow like he wanted to protest but didn’t want to offend Ahsoka.

“Except for the time-” Ahsoka started.

“I knew you could handle it-” Anakin interrupted a frown of annoyance forming a crease between his brows.

“Oh? And what was that?” I asked grinning mischievously.

“Nothing.” Anakin and Ahsoka said together. 

“See now you have my interest sparked,” I said, already knowing we would not be getting this story out of them anytime soon.

“It was just a little miscommunication, and things got a little…. hairy.” 

“I see….” Obi-Wan mumbled, “Probably something I’ll be hearing about later and have to reprimand you for?”

Anakin grinned, briefly catching Ahsoka’s eye, “Yeah, probably.”

I shook my head with amusement, reveling in the dynamic the three shared. I knew them all well individually, but I rarely got to see them all together. They exuded a joy and glow that was rare in the midst of the war, a sense of home that seemed to travel with them wherever they went. When they were together they made everyone around them feel like they were in on some hilarious practical joke that was always at the precipice of occurring. Never before within the Jedi Order had I felt quite so at home. 

“Cecil! Are you listening?” Anakin said, waving a hand in front of my face, “They’re playing your favorite song.”

I zoned back in to discover that Anakin was right: this little planet on the edge of the galaxy had somehow managed to dig up an old relic far outside their culture to play at the exact moment that we happened to be on-planet. I all but jumped to my feet, unable to stay stay seated as the familiar baseline filled the room.

“Did you request this?” I asked, feeling that the grin on my face was one none of them had seen for far too long.

Anakin grinned back and glanced conspiratorially at Obi-Wan, “No, but I do know someone who did.”

“Obi-Wan! You remembered!” I said a little too loudly, causing the people around us to stare as I leaned over the table to grasp his hands and tug him off his stool. 

“Cecil no-”

“Oh relax, you requested the song. You’re required to dance now,” I laughed, pulling him after me into the throng of people in the center of the room where the tables had been pushed to the side. I flailed my arms in a way that I knew would look ridiculous in hopes I could at least get him to crack a smile. 

The tactic worked and he seemed to relax a little, letting himself bob up and down on the balls of his feet to the beat of the music. Unsatisfied, I did not let go of his hands, instead forcing them to move, forcing him to at least move his upper body to the music a little. I could hear Anakin laughing and Ahsoka giggling but I couldn’t see anything else but the amused way Obi-Wan was smiling as if it took all his restraint to not burst out laughing. 

“You can laugh, you know. I do look ridiculous. We look ridiculous,” I said.

“That is precisely what I’m worried about,” he deadpanned, still looking extremely uncomfortable with having been dragged out into the throng of dancing blue people, their smaller builds leaving us towering over them and making us stand out. 

“No one else is here. No one to tell on you if you have a little fun,” I prompted, “and I think Anakin and ‘Soka will bother you more about it if you don’t at least pretend to have fun.”

We both looked back at Anakin and Ahsoka to find that they had disappeared, probably in search of the drinks we had forbidden them from seeking. I frowned but their lack of presence seemed to make Obi-Wan more comfortable and he finally started to move, his feet actually shuffling along the ground as he danced.

Maybe ‘danced’ was a strong word. It was more of just moving his limbs in a way that made them slightly off beat but somehow managed to not look completely ridiculous. By the end of the song we were hanging off each other, breathless and giggling like little kids. 

The last note of the song faded and the moment of unadulterated joy faded, bringing us back to reality. The next song picked up slowly, something obviously more familiar to our hosts but also obviously meant for slow dancing. They all coupled up and began slow promanaudes around the room before I could even register that we might want to excuse ourselves. In an instant it was too late and we were the only ones in the middle of the crowd not swaying to the music alongside a partner. 

Much to my surprise, Obi-Wan bowed low before me, offering his hand and said in a serious tone, “Would you care to dance Master Palmarin?”

“How could I refuse Master Kenobi?” I grinned accepting his hand. 

Although I had been holding his hands only moments before in our fervent excitement of my favorite song, this felt forbidden, like something we were not allowed to partake in. A blush rose in my cheeks and all the way through my ears and I hoped that the fact my braids were beginning to frizz out would hide it. However, Obi-Wan’s lips tilted up into a half smile like he noticed and I felt his presence in the Force shift, falling from the unorganized joy he had been exuding to a carefully masked affection that I was immediately sure he had not meant to let me feel. 

The blush rose higher in my cheeks as one of his hands fell on the curve of my waist and the other remained carefully wrapped in mine. I placed my free hand on his shoulder, the familiar feeling of Jedi tunics suddenly alien when I was touching someone else’s.

He led, slowly weaving out of the center of swaying couples, spinning us in slow revolutions around the room. Not for a moment did he break eye contact and not for a moment did I want him to. When he had spun us to the edge of the crowd and could lead us no further he stopped as if he’d been prepared for everything up to that moment. He took his eyes off me for a half second to search the room behind me and I could feel him reaching into the Force, checking for Anakin and Ahsoka. When he did not seem to find them he returned his gaze to mine and I could all but hear his heart hammering in his chest. 

The blush in my cheeks had risen so much I was sure I was looking like an ripe tomato and I couldn’t even begin to effectively push it down because my heart was fluttering just as fast as Obi-Wan’s. A curious desire to hug him closer came over me, to pull him down to where I could study each and every detail of the light blue eyes that were searching my hazel ones so intently. 

Instead I settled for letting my other hand come up to rest on his neck, his long hair hiding the fact that I was practically hanging off him. Both his hands on my waist now, the subtle weight of them feeling completely right and natural despite the little voice in the back of my head that would not stop repeating “Jedi Do Not Form Attachments.”

“I hope you know, Obi-Wan whispered, his breath hot across my face, “I never feel more at home than with you.”

“Obi-Wan-”

“I won’t say anything else compromising,” he said, his eyes twinkling as they remained locked on mine, “but I want you to know.”

I let my hands wander up to cup his face, “Don’t say that out loud. Because then I’d never be able to unhear it. And I’ll never want to leave home either.”

Obi-Wan sucked in a breath, his eyes closing as he leaned his head into my right hand. After a moment he turned his head just enough so his lips brushed my palm, a motion that sent an involuntary shiver through my whole body. 

He remained silent and unmoving for the smallest moment before opening his eyes. His hands  came off my waist to grasp my wrist, pulling my hand away. My fingertips trailed down his face like the tears I felt like crying before falling between us where he held my hands in his.

“You’re right, Cecil, you’re always right.”

I smiled, my voice low and on the verge of breaking, “I know.” 

---------------------------------------

Ch. 2 - Not A Secret

Obi-Wan sat atop the Jedi Temple, legs crossed and deep in meditation. If his eyes had been open he’d have seen the slowly fading light as it began to cast long shadows over Coruscant. This late in the year the far off edges of the great city were shrouded in smog, a glittering haze that was invisible up close. 

The sounds of the Temple district were far off, the dull roar of the deep cityscape almost unnoticeable to Obi-Wan’s ear. Up here it was easy to let everything else go and simply float, let the Force wash over him. The gnawing pressure of the war could almost be pushed away, so far he could barely feel the haunting tension.

Abruptly his concentration was broken, footsteps appearing before him. His eyes snapped open to find Cecil looking down at him.

“Wow, startling THE Obi-Wan Kenobi?” Cecil grinned.

Obi-Wan chuckled, “Only because I wasn’t expecting anyone up here.”

“You’re always up here. It’s not like it’s a secret.” 

“And I thought I was being discreet about my meditation spot.”

Cecil smiled, sinking to the ground in front of him and pushing forward a paper cup full of caf, “I heard a rumor there’s a Council meeting later.”

Obi-Wan ducked his head in thanks, “Yes, there is. But nobody has told me when.”

“Rude of them, seeing as you are on the Council.”

“Which means they want something from me,” he said, eyes sparkling. He returned his gaze to Cecil, briefly getting distracted by the way they nearly glowed backlit by the sunset. 

“Why are you staring at me like that?” Cecil asked. Obi-Wan noticed the way they fidgeted with their own paper cup; the folded edge had been unrolled and rerolled into a mangled depiction of its original form.

“Nothing,” he said, careful to maintain a level tone, “the sunset is just so incredible this time of year.”

Obi-Wan thought he caught a smile creep across Cecil’s features as they turned away, long braids swaying. He had to force himself to not stare, but even still, a stab of guilt flashed through him as the movement revealed the still pink saber burn. Nearly seven months later it still looked painful. 

“It’s rude to stare you know,” Cecil said without looking at him.

Obi-Wan blanched, feeling like he had been doing an excellent job not staring. 

Cecil turned back, this time carefully pulling the many long braids away, exposing the saber burn where it descended into their tunic. With a clearer view, Obi-Wan could tell the wound was healing, that it no longer looked nearly as painful as it had been. But it would scar. A remembrance of those terrible moments. And to think he could have stopped it-

“I know you’re thinking you could have prevented it,” Cecil said, their voice interrupting his thoughts.

“You know it's possible.”

“But it didn’t happen that way. I’ll always have this wicked scar cracking me open.”

“That makes it sound so dramatic,” he said.

“When am I not dramatic?” Cecil asked, taking a sip of the caf and wrinkling their nose, “what does the Temple have against having good caf?”

“Everything apparently,” Obi-Wan said, taking a swig of his own and making a similar face. 

Abruptly, Cecil’s comm crackled, “Master Palmarin, yousa needed inda council chambers.”

They sighed deeply before responding, “Yeah, I’ll be right down Jar Jar.”

“Roger roger,” his voice replied.

Not two seconds later Obi-Wan’s comm went off, “Master Kenobi, yousa also needed inda Council chambers.”

Cecil choked on the caf, attempting to stifle a giggle; only Jar Jar would be so bold to assume they were always together. Obi-Wan’s eyebrows shot up and the humor was clear in his voice when he replied, “Will do.”

“Whatsa so funny?” Jar Jar asked.

“Nothing, nothing,” Obi-Wan said, trying to hide his light hearted tone.

“Iffen yousa say so,” he replied, the line going silent. 

“I guess they want something from me too,” Cecil said with a grin. 

“The rumors circling are about an undercover-ish mission,” Obi-Wan started.

This time Cecil’s eyebrows shot up and Obi-Wan swore he felt a leap in their Force signature, “Do you think they’d really send us on another mission together after what happened last time?”

Obi-Wan frowned, “It was not our fault Ventress showed up. And every other time we’ve been on stuff together we’re literally unstoppable.”

“That’s a bit presumptuous,” Cecil laughed, “Anakin is finally rubbing off on you.”

He laughed too, a feeling of warmth spreading across his chest as their voices echoed across the otherwise empty rooftop, “I guess he is.”

“Good,” Cecil said and flashed a smile that Obi-Wan somehow felt was only meant for him.  

---------------------------------------

Ch.3 - Preparations

“You’ve got to be kidding me,” Anakin said looking around the council chamber with a disbelieving grin, “Those two? As a couple? No one is going to buy that.”

I felt my face go hot and my fingernails bit into my palm. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Obi-Wan shift in his seat and almost imperceptibly felt his Force signature change to match mine: a deep annoyance that well obscured the shock of excitement.

Padmé’s hologram glared at him, “Fortunately, no one asked you Anakin.”

This time it was Obi-Wan’s turn to hide his grin. Even Master Windu’s mouth twitched. I bit my lip but only wished that I’d been the one who said it. 

“I only meant,” Anakin said quietly, “that everyone in the galaxy knows who they are. That they’re friendly with the Senator.”

“Yes,” Master Yoda said, “but young Skywalker. You everyone will expect to see. But suspect a regal and powerful warlord couple they will not.”

The look on Anakin’s face was priceless but he rearranged it so quickly that I doubt anyone but myself and Obi-Wan recognized it: a mix between awe and horror that Yoda would so blatantly hint at something more between the Senator and himself. 

“If I may interject,” Obi-Wan said before Anakin had the chance to say anything he’d regret, “Anakin does have a point. Especially with all three of us, that combination is to be expected.”

Yoda nodded thoughtfully as if he had not already considered this at length. 

“As well known as you think, Master Malmarin is not. Their job discreetly they do,” he said nodding to me, “and disguises you will have.” 

“And that is where I come in,” Padmé said, “You’ll both be unrecognizable out of your Jedi robes. I’m arriving in Coruscant shortly and will get you all ready before we depart for Naboo.”

I raised my eyebrows, not even daring to ask what lavish outfits the former Queen of Naboo had stored away that would coincidentally be my size. 

“And why does this meeting have to be on Naboo again?” Anakin interrupted again.

“To show them we trust them. Enough to invite them into my home,” Padmé explained, barely hiding her exasperated tone. 

“But couldn’t we meet them in some neutral system where you and your family are not at so great of risk?

“It’s an olive branch, Anakin. Whether we like it or not, it is the best course of action to get this system on the side of the Republic,” Obi-Wan said, making far less effort than Padmé to hide his exasperated tone.

Yoda seemed to care little for this exchange, “Prepare Master Kenobi and Master Palmarin, Senator Amidala will. And to Naboo follow they will.”

Seeing it would do no good to argue, Anakin was content to frown and glare menacingly as the rest of the plan was laid out. 

It was simple really. Obi-Wan and I in disguise. Anakin seemingly the only protection to the Senator in the midst of a potentially hostile environment. A dinner over which politics would be discussed. The guests to sleep in an elaborate lakeside villa. And on their way the next morning after another round of political discussions over a  lavish meal. What could go wrong?

---------------------------------------

CH. 4 - Chemistry POSTED

When Padmé arrived on Coruscant I did my best to be late meeting her, purposely taking the long route to her landing pad. But I still had to pretend to not see Anakin’s speeder take off, pretend I did not see the flushed look of joy on Padmé’s face. 

“Good evening Senator,” I said, shaking her hand, “I trust you’re well?”

“No need to stand on guard Cecil,” she said grinning “I’d like to think we’re friends by now.”

“Of course,” I laughed, “I just still feel like I should greet you with formality.”

“Well don’t feel that way. Especially when I’m about to make you stand around in your underwear for far longer than you’re comfortable in effort to find the perfect outfit for you.”

I frowned, having not considered this.

“Don’t worry,” she said, grabbing my arm and whispering conspiratorially, “I’ve sent Master Kenobi his own squadron of people to get him ready. It will just be you and my personal handmaidens.”

“I see,” I said, my frown deepening as I watched the handmaidens unload a multitude of elaborate trunks from her ship, all of them clearly full of clothing.

Arriving in her personal quarters, Padmé slammed the doors shut for effect and skipped ahead of me. 

“Now,” she said, dramatically tossing her overcoat, “not only am I outfitting you, I’m helping you to prepare and embrace your role as a hopelessly in-love warlord couple who are so regal and stunning that no one would dare speak to them without a reason of utmost importance.”

I frowned crossing my arms across my chest, “I-”

“Nope!” she said cutting me off, “that’s step number one. No crossing your arms. You’re practically royalty for the next seventy-two hours. You have to stop carrying yourself like a Jedi.”

“But-” 

“First lose the Jedi robes. And then we’ll work on the rest.”

“Padmé-”

She had crossed the room and began undoing my robes a little too expertly, ignoring my protests. Without the full weight of my Jedi robes I felt naked, not just in the sense of lacking clothing but that I could not remember a time without them. 

“Here,” she said, handing me a small pile of clothes, “put this on. You’re a filthy rich warlord. No Jedi undergarments allowed. And when you’re done, I think you’ll like the first outfit on the top here,” she said, gesturing to one of the sprawling suitcases that seemed to be exploding clothing all over the room.

I nodded, turning away in an attempt at privacy. This made Padmé roll her eyes but she retreated from the room, leaving me momentarily alone. 

Half dressed and struggling to right the deep purple garment that had been laid out for me, I struggled as one of Padmé’s handmaidens appeared. The woman was taller than Padmé if only by a fraction but eerily resembled the Senator. I knew she had a decoy but I was not aware they spent so much time together. 

“Let me,” the woman said, her fingers reaching past mine to rearrange the fabric and close the final zipper. 

She spun me around so I faced the mirror. Someone I did not recognize stared back.

They were tall and regal, their hair teased into its natural style creating a magnificent halo around their head. The jewelry Padmé had chosen glittered brightly as the handmaiden slipped it on the person in the mirror, their wrists adorned with heavy gold bangles and an equally impressive set of necklaces settled on their neck.

 The outfit itself hugged the figure in the mirror tightly around the torso, the neckline covering far less than I had ever imagined showing. At the waist it flowed away from them in a way I was sure would fan when they walked and give the impression of having great violet wings. It was sleeveless, or what could pass as sleeveless save for the draping of fabric attached at each shoulder that cascaded down to meet the rest of the garment. 

“I picked you something you could still fight in,” Padmé said reappearing, “I hope it’s not too much. If you don’t like it I have a couple other options.” 

I stared at myself a second longer, “It’s beautiful Padmé,” I whispered, “I barely recognize myself.”

“That is exactly the intent darling Cecil. And you look absolutely jaw-dropping, I can’t wait until Obi-Wan sees you.

I felt my jaw drop but quickly snapped it shut.

“Dormé,” she said addressing her handmaiden, “Go fetch Obi-Wan will you? He should be ready by now.”

Dormé nodded curtly and disappeared from the room, leaving us alone together. 

“Did you think my choice of Jedi I requested as protection was random Cecil?” Padmé all but whispered, “I’m not about to prod in your business, but you have chemistry. And I needed chemistry for this to work.”

I flushed. It had never occurred to me that someone else might have noticed the thing I’d been trying so hard to quiet within myself. 

“Does anyone else know that?” I asked, my voice quiet and wavering.

“Of course not,” she said cheerily and patted my hand, “Only you. Because if I told Obi-Wan he’d simply combust of awkwardness.”

“I mean-”

Padmé looked at me steadily before striding out of the room, “Life is fleeting Cecil. Don’t miss out on something because of someone else’s rules you aren’t sure you believe in.”

I stood staring after her, my hands all the sudden shaking.

The door creaking open pulled me out of my momentary stupor, Obi-Wan’s figure emerging.

The attire Padmé had chosen for Obi-Wan was far less extravagant than my own, but so far from something Obi-Wan would choose himself that it disguised him well. It was a deep purple, almost black, but the satin shone brilliantly. Similar to my own, the outer layer cascaded down behind him, flowing in an invisible wind when he moved. Underneath was an even darker, yet still purple tunic and trousers. The tunic was of the same satin fabric that looked fit for royalty. Which is exactly what we were pretending to be, so I supposed it was intentional. 

Even from the way he was walking I could tell Obi-Wan was deeply uncomfortable outside of his typical dress but the look suited him. It changed the energy he exuded, less Jedi Master, more warlord with enough money to drown in. 

And he had shaved, the clean shaven face making him look younger, more like the way he looked when I had met nearly two decades ago. Nothing could erase his old soul though, the way smile lines gathered around his eyes just as they always had. As a teenager I’d remarked on them once and he had blushed as his hand went up to feel them. I think he knew I was telling him I loved the way he smiled because I remember that being the first time I really felt his presence in the Force bloom with happiness. 

I shook my head, trying to displace the memory. It scattered only to be replaced with the real thing, Obi-Wan’s smile bringing me new confidence in my outfit. 

“You look stunning darling,” Obi-Wan said, not even resisting adding the pet name. 

“As do you,” I smiled, reaching up to adjust the satin collar of his shirt, “I’m glad you agreed to this particular outfit.”

He let me do so before catching my hand in his, bringing it to his lips and bowing low, “Only so that I don’t look like a peasant next to you.”

I felt heat rise in my cheeks and broke our eye contact with nervous laughter not knowing what to say.

Padmé did me the grace of clearing her throat and Obi-Wan dropped my hand, shooting me a wink. For a moment Padmé circled us observing, trying to decide if we would pass someone other than the Jedi we were. 

“I think the mullet has to go,” she said suddenly to Obi-Wan.

“What!” he exclaimed, his hand flying to his hair. 

“I think people know you too well for it. At least since the war. You already look much different without the beard, but I think a touchup to the hair will help.”

Obi-Wan frowned like she had personally offended him.

“Thank you Padmé. I have been begging him to let me cut it.”

“But I just now got it to fit into a hair-tie,” he started.

“You sound like Anakin,” Padmé laughed and I could tell she said it just to stop Obi-Wan from protesting anymore, “Go change out of these outfits both of you. I’ll have Dormé package them up for you. And a couple other outfits to lay low in.”

“Yes ma’am,” Obi-Wan said, saluting her.

Padmé laughed and swatted him on the shoulder, “Just go. And cut that mullet off.”

I saluted her as well, earning us another grin before she disappeared.

“I’m not letting you anywhere near my hair Cecil,” Obi-Wan said matter of factly. 

“Okay,” I smiled, biting my lip, “I’ll take you to the best barber I know.”

Obi-Wan groaned but didn’t protest. I swore I caught a hint of a smile as he left the room. 

---------------------------------------

Ch. 5- Varykino Villa

The looping hallways of Varykino Villa had sated my nervousness; I felt I was sinking into the place, the part I was playing becoming more and more real.  Obi-Wan had taken my hand, holding it like it was the most normal thing in the galaxy. For a fleeting instant I could see us standing together in some other life, some version of ourselves that did not involve the Jedi Order and was just us living on some gorgeous planet where no one ever bothered us. 

“You still with me?” Obi-Wan asked, squeezing my hand.

I shook my head, sending the images scurrying away, “Sure am. Let’s go husband.”

He leaned in so only I could hear, “Let’s go Mx. Kenobi.”

—

As the night wore on,  I couldn't help but wonder why nothing had gone wrong. Nothing ever went this right. No one had even looked sideways at Padmé. No one had squinted at us in recognition. The political discussions were going swimmingly. And I was giddy with joy at getting to spend the evening hanging off Obi-Wan’s arm. 

Anakin and Senator Amidala had long since disappeared and I was beginning to think that this was all a ploy to get Anakin on-planet where the two could excusably be alone together. Obi-Wan pretended not to notice their absence and I pretended not to notice the way he had averted his gaze every time he saw them. I imagined that he deliberately shoved away any memories of other times his former Padawan sat too close to the regal Senator or gave her too long of a hug. 

Everything added up now. I’d always pretended not to notice the way Anakin’s presence in the Force burst with life anytime Padme was in the room, the way he never stopped looking at her, the way he had been so nervous to meet her again for the first time all those years ago. Even the image of little Anakin rose in my mind, the way Obi-Wan had told it, Anakin’s eyes took in Padme as if she were an angel coming to rescue him. 

But tonight with the evidence staring me in the face, I came to the same conclusion that I suspected Obi-Wan had: as long as it never directly interfered with Anakin’s official duties, he could pretend it wasn’t happening before his eyes. Because they needed Anakin far more than the Jedi Council needed to know that Anakin had fallen in love with the Senator.

As the evening progressed, Naboo’s sunset faded, only one moon reflecting onto the lake now, the guests slowly vanishing into Varykino Villa’s many rooms. Only the occasional wanderer in search of a midnight snack appeared, but scurried away upon catching sight of the two sharing a plate of food on the grand balcony overlooking the lake. 

At least that was my impression of the one child who wandered into the room behind us and all but ran away when we turned to look.

“I’d turn and run too if I saw you backlit by moonlight and glowing so ethereally,” Obi-Wan said without looking at me. 

I felt a blush rise on my cheeks, “Ah yes, because I am oh so angelic with my hair in desperate need of taming and a good night’s sleep.” 

I didn’t look at him either. It felt safer to tease him without looking for risk he’d see right through me, for fear that he would sense that I wanted him to continue, to tell me everything about how he thought I was angelic in his eyes. 

Obi-Wan set down the glass of wine he had been nursing, the dark red substance glittering in the twinkling light of the moon, “Cecil, you’re always angelic.” 

I mentally berated myself for the shot of joy the words gave me, the warm flame of affection I’d been snuffing out making a new attempt to surface. An involuntary shiver passed through me and I thought about how Naboo’s summer was cool this year, uncharacteristically so according to Padme. But after the earlier rainstorm, the clouds had vanished and left the outlook onto the lake clear. With our backs to one of the intricately carved pillars of the balcony we were almost touching, our arms balancing careful millimeters away from each other. 

“Are you cold?” he asked after a second when I did not respond.

“No. Just tired.”

“Let’s go to bed then. We still have a long breakfast full of more politics tomorrow.”

I nodded and accepted his hand as I stood up and we made our way back to our rooms.

With my hand in Obi-Wan’s, my head was swimming.  Neither of us had consumed anything alcoholic but it felt like I was somewhere else, not in the moment anymore, like a memory surfacing so clearly I could feel it. A moment seemingly outside of time, a dream. 

We were on some planet in a far off system, no one recognized us. The planet’s summer weather was just beginning and it was one of those evenings where a careful coolness sets in after the sun sets. The balcony doors of our room opened onto the countryside sprawled out below to meet the nearby town. And save for the birds, we were alone. 

“Can you undo this? It’s stuck in a knot,” Obi-Wan complained, flopping dramatically into a chair.

I turned from beginning to unbutton my own clothes to look at him, shaking my head, “you know, I really had thought you’d know how to at least undo a tie if not tie it up.”

Obi-Wan frowned, “I think the issue is that I did it wrong and now it won’t come untangled,” he said, gesturing to the now wrinkled and disheveled garment.

I rolled my eyes but crossed the room to where he sat, standing in front of him just close enough to slip my fingers underneath, working it loose from the knot he’d managed to wrestle it into. Chin tilted up to allow me to untangle it, I could feel his eyes steadily searching my face but I stubbornly refused to meet his gaze, focusing intently on the issue at hand. 

“You’re right,” I said, “there is no way this was correct in the first place.”

“Hey,” he said, his voice flying up an octave, “Just because I can’t tie a tie doesn’t mean I’m not a gentleman.”

After a moment the garment came free and fell into my hands. Obi-Wan did not stop looking at me and I suddenly felt it was very obvious that I was refusing to meet his gaze. Instead of meeting his eyes, I handed him the tie and lifted my hands again to straighten his collar. 

Even though I wasn’t meeting his eyes I could feel his smile; it reached out to me through his Force signature. And Obi-Wan was doing nothing to conceal the affection in it. 

He seemed to sense the moment I realized this, like he was waiting for me to see it, waiting for me to realize that right here on this planet in the middle of nowhere he was holding nothing back.

“Cecil,” he said, not whispering, but sure, confident that everything he was doing was alright, permissible even. 

“Cecil, will you look at me?” he asked finally, standing and lifting a hand to gently grip my chin.  Meeting his gaze I found the soft blue sea that I so desperately wanted to get lost in. As I did so, that seemed to bring him to a decision, his presence in the Force suddenly softening, a wall that I hadn’t known he’d been holding suddenly no longer there. The bright warmth of his presence felt like the first day of sunshine after a cold winter, something I could never replicate elsewhere. He’d brought down this wall before, but only just enough to peak past. Now I could see everything.

As he stood, I let my hands trail down his neck and slowly fall onto his chest. 

“Can I kiss you now?” he said, whispering this time, like asking too loudly would scare me away. 

I nodded, almost imperceptible, also pushing assurance of my consent at him in my Force signature, assurance that despite my rare desire to kiss someone, right now I wanted to. To kiss him. 

He breathed out and closed the small distance between us, one hand reaching up to cradle my head, the other twining around my waist, pulling me to him. As with every other thing he did, he was gentle, every fiber of his being exuding a soft but vibrant joy. 

I was first to pull away, suddenly so breathless the room had started to spin. Obi-Wan’s hands were light, barely touching.

“Are you okay?,” he whispered.

I swallowed, resting my forehead against his, “More than okay.”

My breath was ragged and I knew he could feel my fingers shaking. This was something I'd never experienced before. Wanting more. I’d never wanted more. Not ever. 

Obi-Wan seemed to notice the fluttering of my pulse and visibly leaned back, “Are you sure you’re okay?”

“Yeah,” I paused my voice unsteady, “Obi-Wan, I’m sorry, I don’t think I want to-”

“Don’t apologize for anything,” he said, his voice firm, “there is nothing to apologize for. I will never expect anything from you.” 

“But I-”

He softly placed a finger on my lips, “I think you and I have very similar approaches to uh- things like this.” He gestured between us before gripping my hands firmly, “I want you to know that.”

“Oh,” I whispered. I tuned in to his Force signature hoping I’d find a better explanation there.

His presence in the Force was warm, welcoming, but tainted with nervous anxiety. But the hint of fear wasn’t because he knew the Order would never allow affection like this. It wasn’t because he was truly nervous about kissing me. The feeling bleeding through the Force was something else entirely. 

He was afraid that I wouldn’t be okay with just this. And nothing more. He was afraid that I would want more from him, that I wouldn’t be okay with just this. 

“Oh,” I whispered again and I could tell he was letting me see a part of him no one ever saw. At my feeling of acceptance in the Force he pushed something more; another hesitation, a feeling that he wasn’t even sure what he wanted, that he had never had the opportunity to find out what he wanted. 

“Oh,” I repeated for a third time, beginning to feel that I needed to respond to this soul-baring moment with something more than a single syllable.

—

“Just stay,” I thought as we climbed into bed, clad in our fancy silk pajamas,  “stay right here and let me fall asleep next to you just once,”  letting the thought bleed into the Force. Maybe the words were not there but the feeling was, the intense desire to be close to him. Just like this, wrapped in cozy blankets and content to be beside each other.

The look on his face changed and he relaxed, sinking back into the bed. He lifted his arm, reaching around me to pull me close. I sucked in a breath but did not resist, letting him gather me to his side, all but falling into his lap. 

“Is this okay,” Obi-Wan said, freezing for a moment, his life Force fluttering with uncharacteristic uncertainty. 

Now with my head nestled into the crook of his neck I had to pull away to look up at him, finding his eyes filled with emotion as he looked down at me. For a second I couldn’t breath, his eyes, the smile lines, the little strand of hair falling into his face at this exact moment- it was everything I saw every day but right now it was only for me to look at. 

“Yes of course.”

—

Obi-Wan watched Cecil carefully, the slight rise and fall of their side, the way a lock of hair fluttered softly every time they breathed out. As he imagined was the case with most Jedi, they looked younger while asleep. His final thought before drifting into sleep was that he couldn’t wait to wake up next to them; it was something he knew he could get used to.

---------------------------------------

Ch. 6 - Reassurances

Outside, rain came down in huge droplets. But the roar of Naboo’s sudden downpour was barely audible over the hundreds of voices conversing merrily, the din almost masking the music. In the midst of it all no one paid Obi-Wan and I any notice, the two of us holding the room under observation, watching for any potential harm to Senator Amidala. 

Some time ago he had taken my hand in his own and to any onlooker we looked like any other couple present. All evening I’d been watching the other couples, mimicking their behavior, watching the way they mirrored their partners, the shorter ones beginning to lean their heads on the shoulders of the taller ones as the night wore on. I followed suit, leaning into Obi-Wan’s frame-

“Master Palmarin,” Commander Cody’s voice said suddenly, “can you weigh in on this?”

I jolted out of the memory and back into reality. The whole table was staring at me, the Jedi Council’s holographic images flickering faintly, the smirk on Anakin’s face poorly hidden. The war room lights of Obi-Wan’s Star Destroyer were suddenly too bright, their fluorescent humming loud in my ears.

“Sorry, what?”

“Commander Cody was just asking if you thought the warlords from the Naboo meeting could be pushed for more definite support?” Anakin interjected, “Unless you have something more important on your mind you’d care to share?”

I resisted the urge to stick my tongue out at him as I answered, very intently not looking at Obi-Wan either. He sat at the head of the table, carefully observing everything being said, his face stoic, voice always calm and steady. He gave no indication that he was distracted.

As for me, I couldn’t stop replaying every moment of Naboo in my head. It had been a week since we had left and we had barely spoken. The silence was loud, loud enough to gnaw anxiety into my heart. Loud enough to make my stomach twist in knots. Loud enough to let me hear the imaginary whisper that said he didn’t mean anything he’d said and that he regretted it at all.

I turned the thought over and over in my head. By the time the meeting concluded, I had convinced myself we had broken our friendship and that everything was over between us.

“Well,” Anakin said slamming his hands down on the table as soon as the holocomms shut off, “Snips and I have shit to do-”

“Language Anakin,” Obi-Wan warned.

“We’ve got shit to do Master” Ahsoka repeated, a wicked grin on her face as she stood with Anakin.

“You two are hopeless,” Obi-Wan said and crossed his arms. I laughed and he sent me a half-hearted glare that shot a jolt through me.

“But you love us, don’t ya?” Anakin said.

“Unfortunately yes,” Obi-Wan laughed, “Now scram, get off my ship.”

“Yes sir,” Anakin grinned, mock saluting his former Master. 

“We’re scramming, Master,” Ahsoka giggled as she followed Anakin out.

I couldn’t help but smile after them, adoring the way the three acted like family. Even Cody had a smile on his face when he stood to leave. He only nodded in farewell, ever the perfect soldier returning to his post.

As soon as his footsteps faded Obi-Wan’s fingers flicked over the controls before him, closing the bridge’s doors and opening the blast shields. The swath of empty space stared back at me, stars twinkling, daring me to wish upon them.

“Cecil, you’re so anxious I can hear your heart beating across the room,” Obi-Wan said, nearing me. 

I still didn’t look at him, the thoughts I’d been chasing all week roaring in my head. He leaned against the table, very close but not touching. 

“I- I’m just thinking.”

“About…?” he prompted and I could feel his Force signature probing mine. 

“We’ve barely talked all week. Do you regret something you told me on Naboo? Or the kiss? Or what the Council would say? Or-” I spluttered, all my questions rushing out before I could stop them. 

“Oh darling,” Obi-Wan whispered, his voice soft. He leaned down to press a kiss to my forehead before squatting before me so his eyes were level with mine, “I should have just said it before. You shouldn’t have to guess.”

“Guess what?” I said, my voice shaky.

“That I love you. I always have. From the moment we met, even if I wasn’t aware of it, you were always tangled in my soul.”

I sighed in relief, a sound that came out as a sob, “Me too. I mean- I thought it was just me-”

“Certainly not,” Obi-Wan said as his hand came up to wipe the tears that were trying to form.

“I always have. And I didn’t know it. Even with our Force bond-” I said, my voice still wavering.

Obi-Wan laughed, and drew away to stand where he could hold my hands in his,  “You know - maybe you don’t know - but our Force bond, our dyad, it’s stronger than mine with Anakin. Stronger than the one with my own Padawan.”

“Oh,” I laughed, suddenly very self conscious.

“So don’t doubt for a minute that I love you Cecil Palmarin,” he whispered as he pulled me from my seat.

“I won’t. Only if you don’t doubt me either,” I said, my lips smiling into his.

“Wouldn’t think of it darling,” he breathed as he captured my mouth with his. 

I leaned into the kiss, my hands finding their way into his hair. His fingers ghosted along my torso before drawing me closer, pulling me against him.  He broke away first, but only so he could kiss down my jaw, his lips straying to my neck, the sensation sending involuntary shivers through me. Abruptly his nose poked my face and I giggled. Once I started I couldn’t stop and my laughter echoed through the room.

Obi-Wan kept a hand cradling my face as he pulled away, his smile-lines crinkling in the way I loved so dearly.

“Are you really that ticklish?” he asked, his Force signature warm.

“No,” I beamed,  “I just can’t believe I’m kissing you in the War Room of your Star Destroyer.”

Obi-Wan chuckled and leaned in so our lips were nearly touching “Well it is my Star Destroyer.”

I laughed too, “If you say so, General Kenobi.”

He rolled his eyes, “I do indeed say so, General Palmarin.”

“And what would people say if they were to check the security footage of your Star Destroyer? And see two of their Generals making out?” I asked, still so close to him that I’d barely have to move to touch my lips to his.

He grinned, “I’m sure they’d just be mad that Anakin was right.”

I pulled away from him in surprise and tried to keep the annoyance out of my tone, “Oh really?”

“Don’t worry. He only berates me about you in private. Not even in front of Ahsoka.”

“And how long has he ‘been berating you about me?’” I quoted back.

He blushed and he averted his eyes, “Since the moment he met you.”

It was my turn to blush. “That long?”

“Well sort of. He did ask if the two of us were something more as a kid. But then he didn’t bring it up again until- until much later. 

“And by much later you mean…?”

Obi-Wan cringed and took a small step away from me, a flash of something that must have been guilt passing through the Force. 

“Remember when I had to fake my death-”

I felt a surge of annoyance, “How could I forget?”

“After that, after it was all over-”

“Don’t think I ever really forgave you for that-” I said, poking his chest.

“Yeah well, that’s what I mean. After that, Anakin was livid. And not just because he’s Anakin. Because he saw what it did to you.”

Obi-Wan had paused and seemed to lose himself in a memory, “And then last year, when we almost lost you to Ventress- he saw what that did to me.”

“And then he wouldn’t let it go,” I said matter-a-factly. 

“So much so that he tried to stop us from pretending to be a couple for the Naboo mission because he was afraid that it would become obvious to everyone else too,” Obi-Wan chuckled.

I shook my head and smiled before I pulled him back toward me, “That really doesn’t add up-”

“Well, it’s what he thinks.”

“Let him, or anyone, think whatever they want,” I whispered before kissing him again. 

If I could have stayed in that moment forever, I would have. But eventually he pecked the corner of my mouth and pulled away. 

“I could kiss you all day, but I fear we have duties to attend to,” he said.

I closed the distance between us once more, kissing him a moment longer, melting into him. 

“I fear the same,” I whispered when I pulled away. 

“Most importantly, deleting the security footage,” Obi-Wan said, his voice tinged with regret. 

I smoothed his hair from his face, arranging it so it wouldn’t look like he’d been making out with someone, “unfortunately, you're right.”

“And you know that what we talked about at that meeting means I won’t see you for ages,” Obi-Wan said, but made no move to retract himself from my embrace. 

“It’s probably for the best,” I whispered and averted my eyes. 

Obi-Wan seemed to mull it over as he searched my face. It would be good for us to be away from each other after all that had transpired. We couldn’t let our focus be compromised by each other any more than it already was. And we certainly couldn't allow rumors about two Jedi Masters falling in love. 

---------------------------------------

Ch. 7 - Pep-Talks

It was months after our kiss in the War-Room and every time I could find an excuse to visit  The Negotiator and its General I gladly repeated the practice. Frankly, I’d only visited twice because I had my own fleet to run, but it kept me on my toes, just knowing that Obi-Wan would be there if I went to visit. It was never more than stolen kisses and whispered adorations but I found I didn’t want more. Not now, maybe not ever. 

“Do you remember when they first told you that you’d be a general in this war?” Obi-Wan asked.

I was curled up in his lap where we sat on the floor with our backs to the bridge and looking out into the vastness of space.

 “I do. Vividly. It was right here in this room,” I said, not wanting to recall the memory.

“I only ask because I want you to know that what you felt then, for once in your life you were wrong. You are a wonderful General.”

I craned my head to look up at him, “And you know that I would have refused to do it if it hadn’t been for you.”

He glanced down at me, “What do you mean?”

“You gave me this whole pep-talk. About how I was one of the most accomplished Jedi of the age and if anyone was prepared to lead an army, it was me.”

“And it was true. Still is,” he smiled.

“And you gave me this hug,” I started, “it made me feel like it would all be okay.”

“Because it was going to be,” Obi-Wan sighed, placing a kiss on my head.

“And,” I paused, not sure how to get the words out but knowing I was ready to say them, “that’s when I knew I loved you.” 

I paused because Obi-Wan had pulled away so he could see me, hands still grasping mine but now sitting cross legged.

“But especially in this war,” I continued, feeling cruel that I’d make this confession of love but litter it with my war philosophy, “it would have been excusable for us to fall in love. The whole world has gone to shit and even if we win, it would never have been the same. Too much has changed. The Jedi order will be reorganized. I just wish we’d known it then.”

Obi-Wan looked like he didn’t know what to say, “How are you so sure?”

“I can feel it,” I said, surprised, “Can you not?”

Obi-Wan frowned and I continued, “Something has shifted. Too much is different now, even the Force feels different. Maybe it’s just that the Dark side has gained too much power, but we can never go back to those ancient traditions if we hope to retain anything of the Jedi.

Obi-Wan drew back further, staring intently, “Those are dangerous words Cecil Palmarin.”

I rolled my eyes, “I know. That’s why I haven’t said them out loud before. But whatever happens, it won’t be the same.”

Obi-Wan didn’t respond but I could tell he was weighing my words, his Force presence full of conflict and apprehension.

“But we don’t have to worry about that yet,” I said, reaching up to soothe his hair away from his face; in the last couple months it had started to get long again.

“What worries me Cecil, is that you are always right,” Obi-Wan mused.

“No I’m not-”

“About the things that matter, you tend to be. You have excellent intuition. And I just don’t know if I’m ready to confront that reality.”

“You can’t live in the confines of the Jedi Order’s reality forever.”

“Couldn’t I? That is the call of the Jedi, is it not?”

“Not anymore,” I whispered.

“But-” 

“And you know far better than I, Obi-Wan, it’s not about the Jedi. It’s about the Force. You could live without the Jedi. But not the Force. That’s the life we will always be tied to.” 

“Hmm,” Obi-Wan said, his eyes focusing on something far away. I could feel him contemplating again, mind working over what I said. A pang of anxiety hit me in knowing how much value he placed in my opinion - and that with this knowledge I would so willingly shatter the little shard of hope that was left for returning to the time before.

---------------------------------------

Part 2 (Chapters 8-13)

[rainbow-universe]

This is so good!!!

If Only - Part One

Trope: Whump/Comfort (A and B help each other after they are both injured) + Bonus Trope: PINING

((Part Two))

Pairing: Obi-Wan Kenobi x GN!Reader

Plot: After a mission turns out to be a set up, Obi-Wan and Y/n flee to safety. Injured, they help each other dress their wounds, trying to ignore the growing feelings and the tension that arises between them.

Warnings: Mentions of fighting/violence, blood, injuries. Angst. No smut, but there are lingering touches and insinuations of "feelings" - basically the closest I get to writing smut anymore.

Words: 3.1k

A/N: This takes place during the Clone Wars. This is also my first time writing for Obi-Wan, sooo, I hope I did him justice.

-

You stared ahead of you, as the distant stars flashed past. You were close to your destination, and the feeling in your gut remained. Glancing over at Obi-Wan as he checked the scanners again, you swallowed, wondering if you should say something. He hadn't mentioned feeling off about this mission, so you assumed maybe you were over-reacting.

"Is there something you wish to say?" His smooth voice broke the silence as he looked over at you.

You felt your cheeks grow hot as he caught you staring. You cleared your throat. "I just-" You hesitated and he frowned a bit, waiting for you to speak. "I have a bad feeling about this."

Obi-Wan watched you for a moment, his face emotionless. Nodding his head he looked down at the screens, noting you would be arriving at your destination in less that three minutes.

"Yes. Me too." He finally said, his voice low.

You felt your heart skip a beat. "Really?"

He looked over at you, and a soft smile graced is face. "You really must stop ignoring your gut feelings Y/n, you'd be surprised how many times you'll be right."

You nodded your head as you looked down at your hands. "Yes, I know. It's just- I don't want to be right." Looking back up, you stared out the window again.

Obi-Wan continued to watch you, agreeing with your thought. He had a bad feeling about this mission too. He could only hope he was wrong, but knowing that you felt it too, he was less confident.

Tearing his eyes away from you, he watched as the ship came out of hyper-speed, in the distance, the small forest planet. He took a deep breath as he began to pilot the ship down to the planet. He went over the plan in his head again.

Arrive at the meeting point. Meet up with the apparent rebels who have information on a planned attack from the Empire. Return to base, and work on a plan. Should be simple, if only for that underlying feeling that this was a trap.

As you and Obi-Wan walked off the ship, you looked around you. The trees towered over you, up above the leaves, you could hear small creatures jumping from branch to branch. Looking into the dense forest ahead of you, you felt as though you were being watched.

Obi-Wan walked up beside you, his shoulder brushing yours. If this was any other situation, you'd be focusing on that. But as you met his eyes, he nodded every-so-slightly. "I feel it too." You both looked out at the forest again. "The meeting point is not far from here. Let's go, but be cautious."

Your hand sat on the hilt of your saber as you followed Obi-Wan into the trees. Your eyes scanned the area constantly, the growing feeling of danger washing over the two of you.

Every once and a while, Obi-Wan would look back at you, making sure you were still close behind him. He wasn't sure about you being with him on this mission. But you insisted on him not going alone, so he allowed you to come. Though you were still in training, you were talented, powerful, and he trusted you more than most, plus he enjoyed your company. But that lead to feelings he should not have, feelings he had to push down deep beneath the surface.

As the sound of a breaking branch was heard to your right, both of you froze. Obi-Wan took a step backwards, towards you, reaching out his arm, signaling you to step away. Walking behind him, he glanced back at you, and you locked eyes. Simultaneously you both took out your sabers, ready for anything.

Hearing another branch break, closer than before, you both waited for whatever it was to appear. Another branch, then another. As something passed through the trees, you felt a relieved and amused breath leave you. The large equine-like animal glanced at the two of you before casually continuing on it's way past.

Obi-Wan looked back at you, noting the smile on your face. He felt his lips quirk in amusement as well. "Okay, let's keep going."

You were about to follow, when suddenly you felt something in the back of your mind telling you to run. "Wait." You muttered out, causing Obi-Wan to look back at you. He saw your face glossed over with something akin to confusion and fear.

And then he felt it. Turning, he looked into the trees. Using his connection to the force, he reached out. There was something close, something big, something dangerous.

He let out a breath. "It's a trap."

Suddenly, a blast came through the trees, striking the tree right beside you, sending you diving to the ground for cover. As another blast came, you and Obi-Wan ran out of the range of fire, diving behind some trees.

Obi-Wan looked your over, making sure you weren't injured. Then, looking into the dense brush, he could see movement in the distance. "They're coming." He whispered, and you nodded. He looked back at you, "Ready?"

You nodded once, before you both began to move silently through the trees. Just because you were being ambushed, did not mean you could not turn the tables.

Jumping down from your cover, the two of you attacked the group of droids that had fired at you. You sliced through them quickly, before turning to one another.

"That was too easy." Obi-Wan said, voicing your shared thoughts.

Just as you opened your mouth to speak, a blast came from the trees behind, striking you in the arm. Letting out a yelp of pain, you turned, ducking down, as another blast shot past. Quickly, Obi-Wan reached down, grabbing one of the androids blasters before firing into the trees. Hearing a metallic cry, and seeing sparks within the trees, you new he had gotten the droid.

You could hear more approaching steps, as what sounded like an army of droids began to push through the dense brush. Obi-Wan reached out, grabbing you and pulling you towards the trees.

As you rushed through the brush ducking as more blaster fire followed, you saw your ship in the distance. But you both knew before you saw, that your ship was surrounded as well.

Running out of the trees, you spun, and with a swing of your arm, you threw out your saber. You watched as it cut through three droids, before you reached out your hand, forcing it back to you. From beside you, Obi-Wan blocked the oncoming blaster fire before taking out the last two droids.

As you made a run for the ship, the droids gained on you from behind. Feeling a sharp pain graze your thigh, you let out a yelp as your leg dropped out from underneath you.

Obi-Wan looked back, seeing you gripping your thigh as you rose to keep walking. Past you, a droid was aiming at you again. Without thinking, he ran towards you, grabbing your arm, he pushed you down, just as another blast rang out.

Obi-Wan winced as the blast grazed his shoulder, burning through his cloak. Pulling you into the ship, you turning, firing at the droids as the ship doors closed. Blasting could be heard striking the ship before Obi-Wan began to take off.

Sliding down the wall, you sat on the floor, waiting until Obi-Wan told you you were in the clear. You winced as you placed your hand on your thigh. The wound was not deep, but it burned just as the one on your arm did.

A few moments passed before Obi-Wan rushed in, his eyes immediately found you sitting on the floor. "Are we clear?" You asked, and he nodded.

"Yes. They failed to track us as well. " Crouching down in front of you, his eyes trailed from your arm to your thigh. Neither wound was deadly, but both were surely painful. "Let's deal with those shall we?" He said softly as he rose, searching for the on-board med-kit.

When he came back, crouching down in front of you, you noted the wound on his shoulder. Suddenly feeling his hand on your arm, you looked at his face, watching as he furrowed his brow, pulling on your sleeve lightly, the fabric was too tight. His eyes shot up, locking onto yours. "You need to take your arm out."

Noting the way your heart leapt in your chest and your cheeks burned, you yanked at your collar, pulling your arm up through your sleeve with a wince. Your now bare arm was out, and you lied it down at your side.

As Obi-Wan's hand's gently grabbed your arm as he cleaned the wound, before lightly spraying it with bacta spray. Your face and neck continued to burn hot as you noted every time his fingers touched your bare skin. You pushed the feeling down beneath the surface, not wanting Obi-Wan to pick up on them.

Focusing so much on your own improper thoughts, you did not pick up on Obi-Wan's. As his hands worked at your arm, wrapping it with a bandage, his eyes unconscious lead up your arm, trailing over your bare shoulder, and then your neck, dropping down to your partially bare chest.

Catching himself, he brought his eyes back to your arm, chastising himself as he tried to shake the inappropriate thoughts away. He felt his body jolt slightly when your arm touched his shoulder. Looking up, he saw you inspecting his shoulder as you pulled lightly at his cloak.

"It's not bad." He muttered, as you continued to look.

"No, it's not" You agreed as you reached down, and grabbed the bacta spray. Leaning forward, you pulled at the fabric, and met his eyes briefly with a light smile. "Your turn."

Obi-Wan's heart palpated lightly as he pulled off his cloak, before yanking down his sleeve. Wiping the wound gently, you sprayed the bacta spray on the wound. As you prepared a bandage, you silently noted the way his eyes seemed to study your profile.

After you placed the bandage, you gently patted it down, your fingers grazed his bare shoulder, and you thought you felt him shiver under your touch. You felt your heart jolt at the thought as you leaned back against the wall, watching him pull up his sleeve.

His eyes trailed down your leg as he adjusted his position. You watched as he gently grabbed your leg, his hands almost fully wrapped around your thigh.

As he gently pulled back some of the fabric of your pants, you spoke in an amused tone, though your heart was pounding. "You're not gonna make me take my pants off are you?"

You saw Obi-Wan's lips curl up into a smile as he continued to look at the wound. "That wont be necessary. The fabric is torn away already" He said softly as his eyes briefly met yours, his eyes almost playful. "Unless you'd prefer too."

You let out a soft laugh. "Careful Obi-Wan, wouldn't want to misinterpret your intentions."

His smile widened as he began to spray the wound on your leg. He felt his chest tighten as you said his name. You were one of the few who called him by his name. Never 'Master', or even 'General', just always his name. He didn't know why it always sounded so different when you said it. Or why he liked it so much.

"What are we going to do when we get back?" You asked, finally breaking the silence.

Obi-Wan let out a breath as he looked up at you. "We will report the ambush, and then find out who sent us this tip in the first place, without checking it out thoroughly. We have many ways to avoid being tricked like this, it shouldn't have happened."

"You think there is a spy at the base?"

"I'm afraid it might be possible."

You nodded pensively, thinking of the possibilities. Looking back at Obi-Wan, he stared into space, surely lost in thought. Realizing his hands were still wrapped around your thigh, you felt your stomach twist. Clearing your throat, Obi-Wan looked at you, before following your gaze down.

Seeing he was still holding onto your leg, he quickly let go. "I apologize."

You smiled at him as you both began to stand up. Your back was against the wall, as you avoided putting weight on your leg. Obi-Wan, who was standing right in front of you, felt an unusual sense of tension take over as he peered down at you. His eyes caught on a small cut on your chin he had failed to notice before. Without thinking he felt his hand rise up, as he gently hooked his fingers under your chin.

You felt your breath hitch in your throat as he did this. You were unsure of what he was doing, until his thumb very gently grazed across your chin. You felt a slight prickling pain, signaling to you that you must have a cut.

Watching as his eyes slowly trailed from your chin, to your lips, you felt your heart beating rapidly in your chest. The tension between you was growing, you were sure neither of you could ignore it. His eyes then trailed from your lips to your eyes, where his gaze held steady.

There was a moment, just beneath the surface where you both felt the overwhelming need to close the distance between you. But as quick as it came, so did the memories of the Jedi code, repeated time and time again until they were drilled into you.

The tension faltered as you both felt you regain control over yourselves. Taking his hand from your face, he cleared his throat softly before he stepped away. "Do you need help?" He asked he looked down at your leg.

You shook your head and smiled softly. "I'm alright, thank you."

Nodding once more, he forced himself to turn away, before he made his way to the cockpit. His heart beat heavily as his chest was tight with various emotion. Guilt, anxiety, desire.

You let out a slow breath when he disappeared. Leaning your head against the wall, you closed your eyes. Chastising yourself for your thoughts you reminded yourself once again who and what you were. You never really agreed with parts of the Jedi code, but you chose to follow them as best you could. You could not give in, no matter how hard it would be.

Some time passed before you felt enough courage to return to the cockpit. When you did, Obi-Wan looked back at you, his eyes looking over your leg as you leaned against the entryway.

You looked out the window for a moment. "How close are we?" You asked.

Obi-Wan looked back at the console, "Not far at all. We're almost there."

You leaned your head against the wall, feeling fatigue beginning to wash over you, just as the cold was. You wrapped your arms around yourself, as you felt a chill erupt over you.

Obi-Wan, glancing back at you, noticed this, and stood up. You watched him closely as he removed his cloak and approached you.

"Here, take this." He said as he offered the cloak to you.

"Oh. Are you sure?" You asked softly.

He nodded once with a smile as he held it out, signaling for you to step forward. Doing so, he stepped closer and swung the cloak around your shoulders before he hooked it around you. Adjusting it, you met his eyes and smiled softly. "Thanks."

Obi-Wan nodded his head very lightly as he found himself unable to step away from you. You were close again, fewer than a foot away. The tension was returning and he knew he would have to force it away again, just as he was sure he would have to do time and time again in the future.

Your eyes locked with his, as you felt your gut twist. Opening his mouth to speak, he quickly close it again before he peered down at the ground and let out a breath. Looking back up at you, you remained silent but questioned him with your gaze.

You felt your whole body freeze as he lifted his hands up, gently grabbing each side of our face. His eyes were locked with yours until he leaned up, and pressed a kiss to your forehead. Your eyes closed as he did so.

His lips lingered for a moment before he slowly lowered his face, and pressed a kiss to your cheek. You could feel the hair on his face prickling your cheek as he rested his face against yours.

You both stayed silent, acknowledging the tension and emotion flowing around you, as you both resisting the urge to defy your oaths. Slowly, he began to move, his nose gliding slowly over your skin, before he stopped, and placed a third kiss, right at the edge of your lips. You took a quick breath in through your nose as you fought the overwhelming tension.

Another movement, this time, his lips were hovering over yours, one slight movement and they would brush. You wouldn't move, you couldn't. So you waited. Waited for his decision, his next move.

Softly, he spoke, his words making his lips ever-so-slightly brush yours. "If only things were different."

You felt your chest tighten, understanding his resolve, and knowing it mirrored your own. "But they're not." You whispered back, feeling your heart ache.

Pressing his forehead against yours, you both let out slow breaths, his lips still close to yours. "But they're not." He repeated, the resolve and regret evident in his voice.

As he pulled away, you let out a soft breath, as his presence faded. Opening your eyes, you saw him sitting back down in the pilots seat, facing away from you. You could see his profile, as he began to regain his composure. Your chest remained tight, as you swallowed, leaning your head against the wall again.

'They're not. Things are not different, and they might never be. So push these feelings away while you can. Or else you will only continue to hurt more and more.'

That's what you told yourselves, silently, resolutely every time your eyes met, every time your shoulders or hands brushed as you walked side by side. Things were not different. Not yet. Maybe not ever.

If only it were as easy to make the feelings go away as it was for them to form.

If only it got easier to ignore.

If only the rules were different.

If only.

xx End xx

Chapter Two

General Taglist: @criminaly-supernatural, @caswinchester2000, @imaginesfire, @rexit-mo

Star Wars Taglist: @hoeforthefictional, @whimsical-daydreams-blog

[awkward-tension-art]

Darkness on Umbara Epilogue (Rex x Reader)

Chapter 13.

Epilogue

cw: Rex x Reader, Reader is a medic, incorrect military procedure, crying, trauma, mentions of killing characters, Spoilers for the Umbara Arc, Pong Krell is an asshole, Anakin Skywalker's rage, reader insert, Grief, betrayal, REX CRYING, reader is gender neutral, no use of (Y/N), if i miss a tag L

In the end, Umbara belonged to the Republic.

General Kenobi's battalion routed the last holdouts of Umbarans. Which allowed the remaining 501st to also secure several sectors.

A pyrrhic victory. One filled with death, betrayal and agony. 

Gunships had arrived to pick up the 212th who joined you in the hunt for Krell. You watched Dogma get on one of those ships, intending to leave the 501st and become a Coruscant guard. 

It suits him, you think.

You were standing next to Rex, watching a 501st ARF trooper help one of the injured 212th stand. Jesse, Tup and Fives were also with you.

“What's the point in all of this?” The clone captain shook his head, “I mean…why?” 

“I don’t know, Sir.” Fives responded, looking down, “I don’t think anybody knows. But, I do know that someday this war is going to end.” He turned his head up to try and meet the captain's eye.

“Then what?” Rex turned to face him, “We’re soldiers. What happens to us then?”

I don’t know. But I’ll be with you when you reach that point. 

Silently, you grabbed Rex’s hand. You hadn’t been able to look at him since killing Krell. You hadn't entirely come to terms with the fact that you ended the General's life.

Another gunship landed and the doors opened. General Skywalker stepped off, looking around furiously. Once he saw Rex, he rushed towards your group, “Captain Rex! Obi-wan sent a transmission that something happened. Krell ordered you to fire on another battalion!?”

You weren’t force sensitive, but the air around Anakin was buzzing with worry and panic. He cared deeply for his men. 

“General,” Rex saluted in greeting, “There’s…a lot you need to know.” He motioned for Anakin to follow to the airbase center.

The Jedi knew something was wrong, judging by his stare. Rex was too tense. too stiff.

You went with him to the tower to answer questions about Krell. It was only right, as you were the one who killed the Jedi. It made sense a Jedi would pass judgment. 

Your lover had only gotten about halfway through his report when you all made it to the top. When Rex explained Krell’s attempted execution of Jesse and Fives, you noticed a growing crack in one of the windows. 

As you and the captain retold events, that crack grew until there was a web of instability through the glass. When the report reached the point of firing on the 212th, the window shattered, sending glass to the ground below.

Anakin’s anger was so thick you could taste it.

His blue eyes were bright with rage and sadness, “You…I should…” He paced, “I should have been here! I should have stopped him!” 

“General…” Your words were quiet. quieter than intended, “No one saw this coming…”

“The council should have!” Anakin shouted, “The council should have known! I should have known! Instead we were so focused on victory…” He stepped back, eyes wide, “How many…How many did he kill with his fucking plans?”

In the light, you swear you could make out unshed tears. 

You cleared your throat deciding to be honest with him, “A little over a third of the 501st is dead.”

“That can’t be!”

 “Kix and I have confirmed the number three times, General.” Your voice was steady, surprisingly since you were so close to breaking down, “A little over one third.” 

Because you failed to save them.

Anakin stumbled back, raising a hand to his face, “Krell…”

“Is dead, General.” Rex answered him, stepping forward, “He was executed after being arrested. His body is in the brig.”

“By who?” 

“Me, General.” You responded, taking the Jedi off guard, “If you see it fit that I’m punished for killing a Jedi-”

“No.” General Skywalker straightened, “No. No one is going to be punished for what happened here,” His voice was trembling. The glass of another window crackled. This time, it was undeniable, there were tears in his eyes.

He cares so much for his men…

The breath the General took was shaky at best, “Rex…I…I want the men to rest. Properly. Once we’re back on Coruscant, the 501st is going on leave, so everyone can recover,” He cleared his throat, trying to get his emotions under control, “I will need to speak with the council, but I swear, I will never leave you all in the hands of a madman ever again.”

Anakin put both his hands on Rex’s shoulders, taking the clone off guard. 

“I promise Rex. This will never happen again. Not while I’m alive.”

Your lover nodded, “I know General. The men appreciate your leadership. No one faults you for what happened.” 

“I still should have been here.” He responded, “Both of you, get some rest. I need to send a message to Obi-wan.”

Wordlessly, the both of you stepped out of the room to the lift. However, before you lowered to the ground, you heard Anakin through the heavy metal doors. 

“How could the council let this happen, Obi-wan!?”

Your lover was staring ahead, brown eyes haunted as the lift lowered to the ground floor. You notice that something in him shifted. As if a switch was just turned off. 

Umbara changed him. It changed you. Most likely changed the 501st too. 

Once outside, Fives and Jesse were waiting, “How’d the General take it?” The ARC trooper asked. 

“Did you see the second broken window?” You snarked bitterly. 

There was no response from your lover. No comment to tell you to hush. You looked over to him, worry washing over you.

Rex looked…empty all of a sudden. His steps seemed unsteady. His expression was blank.

Anakin’s arrival has brought a sense of safety. Everyone knew that the General would fight and defend the clones in his legion. Even die for them, if the situation called for it. With Skywalker here, the 501st captain didn’t need to fight so much. Everyone could finally breathe. Rex included.

Adrenaline crash. He needs rest.

“The General has commanded everyone to rest and recover from…everything that's happened.” You informed the two troopers in front of you, “He’ll speak with the Council, figure out what to do…When we’re able, we’ll be leaving for Coruscant to go on leave.” 

Jesse nodded before perking up, “Captain Rex..?”

“I got him.” You held his arm, beginning to lead him to the barracks, “Get some rest, guys. I got the captain.”

Rex was silent on your small journey to his quarters. He maintained his blank expression, looking calm to an outsider. Those who didn’t know him would think he was handling the situation well. 

But you knew him. He was finally collapsing. 

He’s been awake since landing on Umbara. While everyone else could rest, eat and sleep, he had been working. The captain, as determined and hardworking as he was, was still a human with limits. He was coming out of a several rotation long fight-or-flight episode, and his internal systems were most likely shot. 

Not to mention shock. From death. The betrayal. The trauma. 

Luckily, no one paid you two any mind as your steps lead you to the barracks. Quickly and silently, you opened the door and led Rex inside his small private room. Hopefully with some actual sleep he would come back to himself. 

You’d have to shift your services, you realized. Your focus would need to be on the mental well being of the soldiers. You do have training in psychological health, but you’d have to catch up on the latest research, speak with colleagues, maybe shadow a therapist or two…

That was for the future. Right now, your priority was the clone in front of you. 

“Rex…” You whispered his name, raising your hands to hold his face, “You’ve done everything you can to take care of your brothers. Now let me take care of you.” 

Recognition was in his eyes. He nodded, turning his face to kiss your palm, “I am yours, cyare.” he mumbled lowly. 

The captain would rarely allow himself to be vulnerable. He would always be strong and reliable, never let himself seem weak. Rex was someone who would break rather than bend.

Unless it came to you. 

He gave you his heart. He trusted you with even the darkest most vulnerable parts of his mind and soul. 

You refused to break him.

You took his helmet from his hands and gently placed it on the desk before you began to remove his armor. You started with his arms and chest, slipping the painted and scratched plastoid off his body with ease. 

It didn’t take long for you to have him in his blacks. You looked up at his face meeting his beautiful brown eyes. 

Glossy with tears.

“Oh Rex’ika…” you held his face again, using your thumbs to wipe his tears, “It's over now…”

“My brothers…” He whispered, “So many of my brothers…” His shaky hands were placed over yours. 

“I know…” you responded, pulling him to kiss his forehead, “I know, Rex’ika…” Your arms wrapped around him tightly. You stepped backwards, knees hitting the bed, getting him on the stiff mattress. 

He pulled you into a tight hug, burying his face in your shoulder. You felt the warm wetness of his tears he refused to show anyone else.

You held him, as tightly and as protectively as you could, letting him weep. 

“I got you, love.” you whispered, rocking ever so slightly to calm him, “I got you, Rex.” 

The darkness on Umbara had changed him.  But he wasn’t alone. You’d make sure of that.

[ghostofskywalker]

A Chance Taken

Obi-Wan Kenobi/Reader (they/them pronouns)

Words: 1,772

Summary: It took a long time to get over the boy that you used to spend time with in the Senate building, but your lives took you in separate directions. But when he shows up during the Clone Wars with a dire warning for your planet, you don’t want to let him go without telling him how you feel.

flower and meaning: baby's breath || reconnecting with a lost love

Requested by: @mayo-advance

Note: this is my july work for the @yearofcreation2023, because i thought this request fit perfectly for one of my flowers :)

Year of Flowers Masterlist • Obi-Wan Kenobi Masterlist

You were fifteen years old the first time you met Obi-Wan Kenobi, and you immediately liked him. Being the child of a senator meant that you spent a lot of time on Coruscant, and that you had much more contact with the Jedi than other citizens of the Republic. Spending your days wandering the Senate building had long since lost its appeal, and you were grateful any time he was around because his master was sent on behalf of the Jedi to attend business at the Senate. Barely a year older than you, he would always have exciting stories about the adventures he had been on with his master, and the Jedi way of life was always fascinating. 

The Force was never kind enough to make its mark on you, but you were content enough with your connection to the boy you considered one of your best friends from the moment you crossed paths. What you offered him was a momentary escape, just as much as he offered the same to you. The hidden alcoves and secret rooms of the Senate Building were no mystery to you, and often the two of you would spend time just sitting around in these spaces. Every second of his time was valuable, and it made you happy knowing that he chose to spend some of that precious freedom with you. 

Sometimes you wondered whether he felt the same affinity for you that you did for him, but that query was always answered when he would arrive at the Senate building, full of things he wanted to tell you. You had asked him if there were other padawans that he spent time with, but the answer was no. Most of the other young Jedi were much younger than him and had not yet been assigned a permanent master yet, and the ones that had were never back at the Temple at the same time he was. You shared his experiences, noting that you were often the youngest person in the Senate building at any given time. 

The two of you promised each other that you would remain in touch, and you believed that it would always be the case, but as time went on, you saw him less and less. Growing older meant that Qui-Gon could take him to new places and didn’t have to spend as much time on Coruscant between travels, which meant that the only time you really saw Obi-Wan was in passing. 

And the Trade Federation made things even worse, which you were not happy about. Tensions between them and the Senate, along with your growth into adulthood, was what ultimately led to the decision that it would be best for you return to your home planet rather than stay in the Senate district. You didn’t see the danger, but it didn’t matter. Soon the chance of seeing Obi-Wan Kenobi again fell to zero, and you had to move on with your life.

A feat that you soon learned to be nothing short of impossible. 

You had always harbored feelings for him, as much as you tried to push those down. He was a Jedi, there was no way he could ever return the affections you held. Delusions of a future with Obi-Wan Kenobi chased you no matter how hard you tried to forget, and it took years for you to even begin to move on. 

You just never expected that all of your progress would go down the drain a year into the Clone Wars, when a Republic transport ship touched down outside your parents’ home. 

You had parted ways for the last time when you were twenty, and now, over fifteen years later, your life was very different. You had taken on a public policy role after finishing your education, and most of your days were spent in meetings with various councils and leaders as you tried to solve the issues that your people were facing. It was leaving one of those meetings that you saw him again, walking through the hallways of the building with another Jedi. 

“Obi-Wan?” you couldn’t help the shock that escaped your mouth as you approached him. “What are you doing here?” 

“That’s Master Kenobi to you,” the other Jedi cut in, a scowl on his face. He looked younger than your friend, but their eyes were equally as tired. 

“It’s okay Anakin,” Obi-Wan said. “They can call me by my first name.” 

After official introductions were made, you led the two Jedi into a conference room and asked if they wanted anything to drink (which they refused, as you expected). “Now, what can we do for you here?” you asked, hoping that you would finally be afforded some answers as to why a figure from your past has reappeared without warning. 

“There’s rumors that this planet is going to be next on the list for a calculated Separatist attack, and we wanted to warn you that this could mean violence against your people.” 

“I don’t know what we can do to stop them,” you said softly. “Military power was never something we had in abundance, and I know that we have no intention or desire to join their cause.”

“We may be able to help with that,” Anakin said. He seemed to have warmed up to you after he learned that you and Obi-Wan had known each other for a long time. “The Republic can provide a team of soldiers to protect you and other government officials, as well as some form of protection around the planet as a whole, to hopefully keep any attacks from reaching you on the surface.” 

You nodded. It had always been the goal of your government to keep the war as far away from your people as possible (even though you were not technically neutral and donated whatever you could to the Republic’s war fund). If this warning were true, it meant that now your people would be move involved (against their wishes) should the war come to your doorsteps. But at the same time, if the Separatists were to attack and you did not have any kind of protection, it would mean the damage would be so much worse. 

“Thank you for letting us know,” you said. “If the Republic is willing, we would gladly accept your help.”

Both men nodded, and the two Jedi got up from where they were sitting. “If you need anything else, please don’t hesitate to reach out to us,” Obi-Wan said, a smile on his face. 

It then dawned on you that this meant they would be leaving, and you did not want to give up this chance to reconnect with your long lost friend. “Wait!” you said, getting up and walking towards them. “I can’t let you leave without first offering that you stay here longer. For a meal, perhaps?” 

Anakin began to shake his head. “I don’t-” 

“Please, I insist,” you countered, not even waiting for him to finish his thought. You needed a chance to talk to Obi-Wan and you couldn’t just let him leave, especially when there was a significant chance that you would never see him again. 

“As much as I wish we could stay, I’m afraid that we are needed elsewhere,” Obi-Wan said, and your heart dropped to the ground so quickly that you missed the clear regret in his voice. 

You forced a tight smile, trying not to let your disappointment show. “I understand.” 

But apparently the galaxy had decided to afford you this favor, because Anakin’s comm device began to beep as they were walking towards the door. He stepped out of the room, and suddenly you were alone with Obi-Wan. 

And maybe that was a bad thing, because you decided to do something so bold you wouldn’t have believed it if your future self had recounted the story to you three months prior. 

“I’ve always loved you, you know that?” you said, a soft smile on your face as you looked at him. Despite the fact that the two of you were no longer the fresh-faced children that used to hide away in the Senate building, you still saw that version of him every time you looked into his eyes. “And I’ve finally accepted that you can never say it back to me, but I couldn’t let this chance slip by without telling you, because every time I look at you I feel like you’re the solution to every problem I’ve ever had.” 

Your confession was clearly a shock, and you waited for the disgust to flash across his face. It was inevitable, or at least you thought it was. 

Because you were certainly not expecting him to reach out and take your hand. “I know you think I could never return your affections, but that couldn’t be further from the truth. When I found out that you were no longer living in the Senate district on Coruscant, it broke my heart because I thought for some reason you didn’t want to see me anymore,” he said. “And I’ve always kept my feelings bottled up inside me because I thought that’s what I had to do, but after seeing you again, I don’t think I could do that anymore even if I tried.”

“But-” you stammered, not sure if you were dreaming at this point. “You-” 

“Surely you remember the Jedi Master I trained under?” he asked, a smile on his face. “If there’s one thing I learned from Qui-Gon other than how to wield a lightsaber, it’s that the Jedi Code can sometimes be overlooked.” 

“So what does this mean?” you asked. “You can’t just leave the Order.” 

“I would leave the Order in a heartbeat for you,” he said. “And I have every intention to, when the war is over.” 

You smiled as a tear formed in your eye. You had always admired his sense of duty, and you still did, even if it was costing you precious moments with him. “So I’ll see you again?” 

He laughed quietly as he leaned in and placed the softest of kisses on your lips, and it was over way too quickly for you liking. “I’ll come find you the moment this is all over, how about that?”

You nodded, stealing another quick kiss before Anakin stepped back into the room. As you discreetly wiping a tear from your face, the two of you pulled away from each other before the other Jedi could suspect anything. 

And as you watched their transport ship take off, you couldn’t help but hope that Obi-Wan would be making good on his promise sooner rather than later.

- the end - i no longer have a taglist! if you're interested in being notified when i post, you can follow my library blog @ghostofskywalker-library and turn on notifications!

[rainbow-universe]

Abdhjakshshajsj so soft!! 🥰🥰

Domestic December: Day 31

Obi-wan Kenobi: New years

A festival is held once a year on Coruscant. On the last night of the year the entire planet lights up in gold and blue. There isn’t a cantina or pub that’ll be empty. Children will be allowed to stay up late and even the very old will be letting their hair and tentacles down for the night.

The Jedi order participates in the festivities. Children with their hopes and dreams are in the hearts of every Jedi across the galaxy. Children, young people, and their families are invited to the temple. Where eyes widen in wonder at the abilities the galaxies protectors can do. A few may even be allowed to use a practice saber.

Once upon a time a teenager was allowed to hold an actual saber. A destroyed pillar and several screaming children led the to end of that tradition.

You were among the civilians who walked around the temple. Smiling at the master’s and their padawans who also milled about. A few asked how you were doing and if you were enjoying yourself.

“I don’t supposed you’ve seen Master Kenobi tonight?” You asked one of the Jedi.

This particular Jedi recognized you, although you couldn’t place where he’d seen you before. Perhaps Obi-wan wasn’t as secretive about your relationship as he let on.

“He’ll be upstairs. Last I saw he was on a balcony.” The Jedi explained, nodding towards a staircase leading upwards.

You thanked him before making your way to the stairs. Not many guests would find their way upstairs. It was a quieter area, with many balconies and seating areas to look out over the city. Just reaching the top of the steps gave way to a breathtaking view.

This wasn’t your first time up here. Obi-wan had shown you the view several times. Especially when he got back from a long mission away. It was here that you didn’t need to say anything, you only needed to hold eachother. That you it had to be done in the furthest most alcove was a small price to pay for the comfort of your man’s arms.

It’s a small walk to reach the furthest alcove. Just below the festivities were getting louder with the winding down of the time. Leaning forward on the balcony you can look down at them all.

Couples were finding eachother on the street. Little kids were being held close by fathers and mothers. Babies had been taken back into their cribs long ago while the older kids were wiping away the sleep from their eyes.

“Why hello there.” Came a familiar voice behind you.

You don’t have to turn around to know that it was Obi-wan. He steps up against your back. Wrapping his arms around you in an embrace that is almost crushing. His beard tickles neck your neck. His breath is warm, and kisses are kind on your neck.

“I missed you,” You whispered.

“I know.” Obi-wan replies.

Fireworks ripple through the sky. Blue and white and gold. None of which you really noticed. Instead turning around to focus entirely on Obi-wan. Smiling up at him in a loving expression that is mirrored back.

Just like before you don’t need to say anything. He understand, even without the Jedi mind tricks. He leans in and you close the gap with a kiss that you’ll never want to end.

[taska-rokanh]

Masterlist

Hello! This blog is named after the main character of my Star Wars fanfiction, Shattered Stars, but I have plenty more to offer. I am a die-hard science fiction fan, so I'll be sticking around! Asks and requests are open if you happen to like my work.

Welcome to My Blog

Request Guidelines

Star Wars Masterlist

Star Trek Masterlist

[scarfacemarston]

Pride Month Requests!

My specialties are character x reader mainly because I've never received requests for ships and I'm not experienced in it! If you don't see a character, I can still likely write it. For male characters it will be MLM Reader x character and WLW for female characters. (Trans characters hcs and readers always included. Edit: Non Binary and gender neutral also welcome!) Reblogs appreciated! SFW preferred.

Characters: Bucky Barnes x Reader Steve Rogers x Reader

Natasha Romanoff x Reader Yelena Belova x Reader Peggy Carter x Reader Arthur Morgan x Reader John Marston x Reader Anakin Skywalker x Reader Obi-Wan Kenobi x Reader

Hawke x Fenris Hawke x Isabela Hawke x Merill Dorian Pavus x Inquisitor Cullen Rutherford x Inquisitor Cassandra x Inquisitor Leliana x Warden

More by Request!

[macabre-mangled]

Love Like Wolves

OBI-WAN KENOBI X READER (gender neutral)

WARNINGS: canon typical violence and innuendos, insecurity (on readers end), brief mention of small age gap

SUMMARY: Obi-Wan assures you you're his despite it being secret

A/N: hot dilf. I also don't proofread my writing so deal with it lmao

Satine was gorgeous. You'd admit that. She also was so kind which made it hard when she was clearly showing interest in your lover. Obi-Wan wasn't flirting back by any means, but that didn't stop the hands of that ugly feeling to take hold of your brain. You of course masked it with the force, knowing that he could sense it otherwise. He could definitely tell something was wrong, but didn't have any idea what. You excused yourself to go and lick your wounds like a cowardly youngling. If Obi-wan was concerned he didn't voice it.

In our quarters you didn't find much peace either. in fact you had been pacing, your lightsaber clinking in its holster as you did. You know Obi-Wan would never be disloyal despite no one knowing about you two. He's not the type. However; it also means he can't publicly claim you. Maker, you sound so primitive. Is that really what we are in the end? Just like animals? Are you the same as a loth wolf? They mate for life. Does Obi view you as his life partner? All These thoughts swarmed your head like wasps. Obi was older than you, surely he's smart enough to not throw away a good thing. At least you hoped so.

"They're a good catch, Master Kenobi."

saltines eyes glittered as she spoke, A knowing glint in her eyes. Obi took notice and looked around in panic.

"Relax, I will not speak of it to anyone."

"If I may ask; how did you know?"

Obi-Wan didn't think he was THAT obvious. Or was he? Maker, he hopes not.

"The way you look at them. Its not obvious, but if someone knows where to look they can tell. Now, I will be taking my leave."

He watches Satine go. He surely hopes no one heard their conversation. Maker knows how much trouble he'd be in if the council found out. he wouldn't be able to take it if they took you from him. You're his light in the dark. He NEEDS you. Although now he's picking up on your distress. How did he not notice before? He starts off towards your quarters. He knows how you get. He just hopes you'll be in the mood to let him calm you down.

Upon his arrival he knocks twice then three times; the secret knock you two have. When you open the door he's greeted with your glare. Oh maker, what did he do? He doesn't recall doing anything. Your strained voice startles him out of his reverie.

"How's Satine? You two have fun making eyes at each other?"

Your tone gave away your emotions, something Jedi are not supposed to do. But right now you didn't care. Realization hit Obi-Wan's face.

"Darling, we weren't doing anything of that sort. Satine knows about us."

He calmly said in something just above a whisper as he slowly moved to cradle you in his arms. You let your shoulders fall. you knew this was ridiculous. Of course he wouldn't. You knew that, but maker that feeling took you by the horns. So you gathered all your courage to ask him the one question you had in the back of your mind.

"Do you see me as a life partner? Like would you marry me if you could?"

If he hadn't been right next to you he wouldn't have heard it. But he did and it made his heart ache how small you sounded. He knew you had insecurities, but never had he heard you sound so unsure. The answer was obvious he thought.

"Of course my darling, It's only you. We're bonded like loth wolves. Nothing or anyone will change that."

You snuggled closer to him at his words but his hand held you softly by the chin to look into his eyes. His eyes held an unspoken question and yours held the answer.