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corviiids · 14 days ago

Note

If i ask nicely, would you consider writing the core of Light and L character like you did for Shuake? (IT'S BRILLIANT BTW!! You're so galazy brain. I love reading any meta or just silly posts you posted here <3) because you mention Light a couple time in Akechi's part and now i need to know your thought on him and L.

(Also, about the death note wip you're cooking right now, is it a oneshot or multiple chapters fic? Im super excited for it!)

i ABSOLUTELY would thank you so much for asking and for your lovely kind words. and im sorry this took me seven years to get to i just kept psyching myself out.

here's the ren & goro post this ask refers to for anyone wondering. the 'core' refers to my answer to a writing meme:

26. What would you describe as OOC? [...] it's the same approach i take to language tbh particularly in pronunciation. once you understand how a language forms its sounds at a base level, you dont struggle with the accent on particular words, and you can encounter words you've never seen before and understand how they're likely to be said/spelled/etc. so once i learn to 'speak' a character they come more naturally. idk if that comparison makes sense to anyone else but it does to meeeee all this to say i think a character is ooc if they do or say something i cant reconcile with that core!

the death note wip is a multichap!! thank you for your interest!!! ill talk about it more once i've stopped tying myself in knots plotting it!! broadly it's a what-if type au which has led me to replot an entire series from scratch dont look at me

anyway lawlight below. i will say ive been really desperately wanting to do like a video essay or something about death note which would be a lot about L and light specifically and how i interpret their characters so ill try and not go toooooo insane in this post but maybe ill go more insane later. in a video. with my human voice.

(edit: i failed i went insane)

light - one-way road to the sky

ok let's talk about one of my favourite scenes of the entire series, which i think is widely not super well understood but honestly to me holds the key to light's entire character. it's right there in volume 1

sorry, the only digital copy ive got on hand is the scanlation. for comparison the official print copy reads:

bubble 1: hey, maki, wanna party tomorrow with some guys from s. college? ten o'clock. bubble 2: yeah, totally! bubble 3: hey, can i go too? bubble 4: my mom isn't here yet? what's that nag doing, geez! light (thinking): damn... light (thinking): start looking around you... light (thinking): and all you see are people the world would be better off without.

this happens within the first 40 pages of the first volume. and it's like. haha hey light what the fuck? this is a totally normal scene in everyday life. people are talking about living their lives. nobody's done anything remotely reprehensible in this scene. and light's just walking through the streets experiencing apparently unprompted and quite extreme misanthropy. what's wrong with him

ok let's have a quick look at the first time we meet light in the anime.

[...]

cool cool cool im gonna pivot again let's look at the first song (besides the overture) in the musical.

ok rook! we get it! light yagami is out here like damn we live in a society time to kill people about it. this is news to nobody! we all know this!! that's what the series is about! why are we rehashing all of this

great. cool. awesome. let's look at all those scenes one more time. but this time don't look at light. instead let's look at the people around him

in the opening shots of the anime (after the shinigami world, which actually is much the same theme): news of brutal murder is narrated over establishing shots of tokyo. light is shown dead-eyed, going about his ordinary life, surrounded by random other civilians doing the same thing.

in the musical, light isn't angry that murders happen. he's angry about the inaction and complicity of the ordinary people around him.

these scenes aren't highlighting that light thinks crime is bad. we all know crime is bad. the point of these scenes is to contrast light's frustration and fury against the reactions of the people around him. here's what light yagami is seeing: we're surrounded with rot. but nobody's reacting. and then life just goes on. so suddenly all those completely normal scenes of people being concerned with the superficial details of their life aren't just normality, they're complicity. day in, day out. so the world is rotting, and to light, it seems that everyone is completely ok with that. that's just the way things are. and that disgusts and depresses him. on top of than that, it isolates him: he feels like he's the only one who sees or cares about this, that everyone dismisses him as naive, that no one else can be trusted, that everyone else is able to ignore something he sees as inexcusable. this is a sentiment he repeats again and again. it reads as arrogance, and it is, but it's also isolation - after all it's lonely at the top and just as lonely to feel like you're at the top even if you arent

can i talk about the iliad again? is that ok with everyone. im gonna talk about the iliad again

in book 1 of the iliad, the commander of the greek army insults achilles by publicly and unlawfully taking a prize (the girl briseis) who rightfully belonged to achilles. achilles reacts by withdrawing his troops from the army, dooming the greeks' campaign. achilles had a lot of friends in the army, so why would he essentially sentence them all to death for something that only agamemnon did? well, (because agamemnon did something publicly that everyone knew was wrong, and yet nobody was willing (or at least able) to stand up for achilles and stop it from happening. achilles, disgusted by the inaction of the bystanders, turned his back on all of them. fun fact i nearly wrote a mini thesis (an academic one not just a long post on tumblr) about the intersection btwn this book of the iliad and legal theory but law+classics is such a niche interdisciplinary field my professor couldnt find anyone who could supervise me so i couldnt do it. anyway that's not the point

is this right or fair? who cares, not the point. what im interested in is what that kind of behaviour says about the individual. light, like achilles, is a highly idealistic person. we all know that in the abstract, but take a second to really really dig into it, because it's actually quite an interesting fact about a character who is popularly understood as being cold and unfeeling or flatly psychotic and on a power trip. idealism isn't naivety, it's not optimism, it's not even really a happy thing. idealism is simply a firm belief in the way things should be at the cost of refusing or being unable to accept what is.

this is the core of light yagami to me. light doesn't become kira because he's cold or destructive or crazy. he doesn't actually even do it because he's spiteful or misanthropic. it's very much the opposite. he's misanthropic because he believes in the world so much. isn't that a great contradiction! ok here i'll show you some proof.

in an early scene (also in volume 1), light describes himself as an optimist and ryuk finds that interesting.

so light is an optimist. he believes in a bright future for humanity. he wants to protect humanity. he likes humanity. no, he doesn't believe that people are inherently good, but he does believe in some goodness as a part of humanity and wants to protect the best of people, in an egotistical way:

how do we reconcile that with a young man who walks through the streets listening to completely ordinary conversations by ordinary people and reacts by wishing death on everyone talking?

let's split out what's going on here. remember what's happening in light's head. light yagami is 17 years old. he grew up with a police chief for a father (in a fictional world where the police are the literary stand-in for law as justice so just pretend for a second that police are good im sorry), watching his father work tirelessly to fight crime - but crime continues, making this an endless, thankless task. and while crime continues, so does the world around him. every day light sees atrocities on the news, and he sees atrocities brought home, and then he lives his ordinary life and watches the people around him apparently not give a shit, only concerned with the petty details of their own little lives. bystanders watching wrong happen, selfishly unaffected. day in, day out. that idealism is getting colder the longer this unendurable injustice goes on. so achilles condemns his friends to death.

what human trait is being exhibited? realistically it's helplessness. would being miserable about crime help to end crime? of course not. people have to go on with their lives, that's a fact, it's even a strength. even light begins the series completely unable to do a thing about the rot he sees around him, which is part of why he's so depressed. but that's not what light is seeing. light is seeing ordinary people appear to choose not to give a fuck about injustice. the thing that's sparking his disgust is apathy, real or apparent. light yagami is an idealist. he wants a better future - a utopia that only he can imagine - something that can only happen if either everyone becomes as good as he is, or he takes control.

if you leave an idealist in an unwinnable situation for too long, their pure belief will start to curdle. it will not turn to realism. they will not accept what is. they will only become more and more bitter that what should be, isn't. they will become a cynicist. this is really the heart of my argument and ive made it a million times and ill make it again. idealism and cynicism are not opposites, they're not even two sides of a coin. they are two points on the same line which moves very quickly in only one direction. this is where i start when im writing him: how do i make someone who believes so hard that it's killing him? someone who believes so hard it makes him believe in nothing?

then we find the third point on that line, which someone can reach by gaining sudden power - for example, a magic notebook that kills people: radicalisation.

how do we reconcile his desire to protect humanity with the fact that what he's trying to protect against is also humanity? how can i say light loves humanity when he has such disdain for them? easy peasy: light sees himself as the messiah. my bumper sticker that says ask me about light's martyr complex PLEASE ask me about light's martyr complex i wrote a song about it ask me about light seeing himself as the sacrificial lamb on the (and then the bumper sticker cuts off)

light loves humanity the way a twisted shepherd might love his sheep. something to be protected, but something beneath you that can't be trusted to know what's best for them. humanity is something he loves because it's endearingly pathetic, something to pity and save. repeatedly he refers to becoming kira as a personal sacrifice, something that costs him his soul but that he has to do. it's a delusion of grandeur driven by dual purposes of ego and some desperate wish to change a status quo he's been despairing about for years.

tl;dr: light believes with all his soul in something he thinks is impossible, and it's killing him slowly, and then a chance to change the world just falls out of the sky

L - isolate yourself until you can make believe it's just a game

steeples fingers. i have Things to Say about L Lawliet.

ok listen. listen. Listen. listen. are you listening? listen. in general i think people kind of misunderstand characters who are hyper-intellectual and/or behave unconventionally in social settings. you're all going to fucking kill me for this but i think there's a tendency to like... accidentally turn any character who falls vaguely in this broad category into sheldon cooper. god im sorry i feel like i just shot everyone's collective dog

specifically what i mean by that is that 'awkward' gets flanderised in a way that eventually becomes a caricature of itself, because there is so much nuance to actual social awkwardness that it's very easy to kind of pick a template and stick to it without really thinking about what makes that character 'awkward' and what the root and type of awkwardness is, unique to them. so instead we just get, like... generic big word user. generic driven by logic and logic alone guy. generic guy who doesn't Do Well with other people, for Smart Reasons.

here's a list of true things about L which i think are safe to say are uncontroversial

intuitive

logical, master of deductive reasoning

competitive

behaves in an odd way that draws attention

is aware of that fact

focuses extremely hard on his cases and only cares about being a detective not anything else

isolates himself and doesn't like talking to people partly for his own safety partly because it's boring to him

here are things i have seen in characterisation of L which i would like to dispute

makes decisions and draws conclusions based solely on logic and evidence

doesn't understand social cues

here's a list of alternate interpretations which i would like to propose and that i am willing to back up with evidence and/or by physically fighting over them

is driven primarily not by logic or evidence, but by incredible intuition which is supported by logic and evidence when it suits him

has a keen understanding of people, interpersonal relationships, and social norms

leverages that understanding frequently to his benefit

feels that he is not capable of / not a part of emotions that he sees as being typically human (see his speech about being a monster)

and yet in an abstract and self-contradictory and low-priority way still kind of desires connection, leaving him emotionally isolated

chooses to behave oddly on purpose, not because he doesn't realise he's behaving oddly, but because it is not a priority for him

those might seem like fine distinctions at some points, but stray slightly off the mark and his characterisation begins to vary wildly. for example, interpret L as being bemused or unaware of social cues, and one possible characterisation that may stem from that understanding (which i have seen) is that L doesn't understand sarcasm or jokes - which is demonstrably untrue. L demonstrates weak social skills because social skills aren't a priority for him, not because he doesn't understand social norms. after all he does a reasonably convincing 'i am a normal dudeguy' voice on at least two occasions (suzuki the information line guy and asahi the calling matsuda for drinks guy). even with the taskforce, when his behaviour is more of his usual bizarre self, he still makes the effort to treat them respectfully and meet them where they are, explaining himself when they ask, chatting with them, holding ordinary conversations. you can read this any number of ways but my point is that he can do all of this with relatively little struggle

it's also very much not the case that L doesn't have feelings or care about other people. he's ruthless and he's cool with causing people to die if he has to, but he reacts with visible distress to the deaths of the FBI agents, to ukita's death, to the prospect of other members of the taskforce dying. he does care, he's just not morally driven as a priority.

ok but if he can cosplay as Normal Dudeguy with no trouble then why doesn't he. why does he conduct all his business in dark rooms apart from the entire world forever. is it gauche to use a section of my own fic to explain my point? im going to do it anyway

It is easy to identify in Light what he has long known in himself. That little pearl of disruption, grown around an irritating grain of something just unique and tremendous enough to be uncomfortable to the more ordinary around them. L has hidden it by hiding himself. Light has hidden it by hiding within himself. L's black letter is to Light’s vapid smile is to Kira's invisible bullet.

(honestly a lot of what i have discussed here is also covered in this fic so in case this fucking three thousand word essay is not enough for you you can go read that.)

something L and light significantly have in common is that their intellect and unique way of thinking really set them apart from everyone in the world, which is incredibly isolating. but while L has the 'benefit' (arguably could be a detriment but i think he sees it as a benefit) of a unique upbringing which allows him to use his skills to their full extent without worrying about really anything else, light is very much trapped by social convention. while light's life is privileged and materially perfect, he's stuck inside what society expects of him, while L is able to exist completely outside that paradigm. the result is that light has retreated within himself and spends all day playing a part, barely tolerating the monotony and apathy of the world around him by mechanically performing as expected while smothering the part of him that never has an opportunity to truly come out until kira. L, on the other hand, has no reason to put up with a society that is, for lack of a better term, really just beneath him. so he retreats. remember that the first volume/chapter of the manga is called 'boredom'.

you can see that even in his comparatively limited interactions with the task force, he is having to exercise a level of patience to explain to them what he's thinking at every stage, to have to defend his methods, his instincts, his decisions, etc, needing to step through every stage of his reasoning so that the others can follow and won't object. this is NOT just about masking his odd behaviour, it's also very much about having to step through his morals and his process, which is second nature to him but is new to everyone else and needs explaining. it is visibly exhausting to him, and this is with people he actually seems to like well enough. eg during yotsuba arc when light and soichiro keep raising moral concerns, and he has those little "here we go again" moments (which i love SO much and are so telling of him to me) even though he doesn't let his frustration show. which is why he usually does not bother with it and prefers to work alone. he sits the way he does even though he knows it's odd, because he feels he need to sit that way. when light calls it out, he doesn't question that people will think he's strange, so he's clearly aware. he just explains himself.

but if he were out with people on the regular, he'd need to defend himself constantly. the things L does are not conventional. yes the sitting is just an oddity of his so it's a good example, but it's not just the things that are odd that cause a problem: he frequently makes decisions which seem to make massive leaps of logic nobody else (except light) can follow, and often his actions are morally questionable or even reprehensible. all that is because L is extremely pragmatic and results-focused. it kind of doesn't matter to him how he gets from A to B as long as he gets to B. but the way his mind works is that he makes big jumps that make perfect sense to him but would draw curiosity or objection from anyone who doesn't think the way he does. it would be absolutely exhausting to have to constantly defend every strange or questionable thing he did, so he just retreats.

when he works with other people, i think it's worth noting that the team dynamic never actually struggles for L's awkwardness. this is something i really like about death note honestly - L is quirky and strange, but the series doesn't do that thing where it's like He's A Genius Of Course He's Rude To Everyone. he's actually not. for the most part, L is courteous, patient, and polite. he's sometimes blunt or abrupt, but he very rarely does the thing where he's obliviously cruel or brushes people off. he's considerate of people's needs, he's visibly compassionate of other people's emotional difficulties, and he very rarely loses his patience. when matsuda tries to tell the locked-up light about kira resuming activity, L snaps "Matsuda!" to stop him, and then immediately corrects himself to go "I mean, Matsuda-san." it would have been really easy for the series to do that tropey shit where he's so smart that he doesn't bother with politeness, but he factually does. he makes the effort to treat people politely even when he's not actually being kind. when he's asked to explain himself, the reader can see he's tired and annoyed, but he doesn't take it out on people. on the odd occasion he does make fun of someone for being slow, he does so in mostly light-hearted ways. so he is very capable of dealing with other people directly. his lack of social skills aren't for lack of understanding. he just can't be bothered. it's a waste of energy to try and behave 'normally' or to do things that other people find acceptable, whether that's due to social norm or common morality. it is so, so much easier for L to do things alone. without the need to explain or defend his behaviour to anyone, his isolation turns real world problems into something almost purely theoretical. so it really is like a game for him, at least at first.

whatever

i think it's really important for a character like L to not be fooled by the surface-level categorisation of 'smart awkward character'. we really need to find what's driving his awkwardness. it's not ignorance, it's not even really disdain, it's exasperation. he's tired of being surrounded by people who just can't keep up with him, and he does not have enough energy or interest to spend his time handholding everyone through his process, so he just does whatever the hell he wants and avoids people as much as possible so he doesn't have to deal with it.

look i know this is a really long way to say stuff that people mostly already know, but i think L is one of the most finely nuanced characters in the series because he looks like such a simple expression of a known archetype and the ways in which he subverts expectations are so granular that it's easy to completely miss them even while appreciating how interesting he is. the way this translates into how i write him is that he's polite and has a lot of patience until he simply doesn't, at which point he'll inwardly or subtly express that he wishes he didn't have to bother with this shit, that he picks up on fine social and emotional details that other people will totally miss, but that he'll always put his own whims and plans before anything else.

tl;dr: L behaves like someone who is constantly moving at his own pace and for whom dealing with people is rarely worth the effort, but this does not make him inept or unkind.

#i also wanna say i have my own personal headcanons regarding like #l and light's experience with neurodivergence etc #but that doesn't play into my analysis here so much. this is just about how i read their behaviour and motivations #diagnosing fictional characters is not really something i feel comfortable doing out loud #because i dont feel it's my place to do that. ill just keep those thoughts in my head #rookthots #death note #long post #i got this ask in like september #im so sorry #i got stressed about sharing my opinions on the internet so i just sat on it for months #IT'S MY OPINIONS. MY OPINIONS ONLY. only my personal thoughts and opinions #only my personal approach to writing these characters #only my personal fucking doctorate on lightology that im presenting on tumblr

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spoiler-alert-andabunchofnumbers · 4 months ago

Text

Anyone else start as a fanfic writer then started writing your own original ideas, and the best way to do it is to write your drafts like fanfiction of your own work? Like that's the only way I get stuff done.

I write a story with the characters I like, write an arc with facts about the world and characters as it becomes relevant, no real point to the scenes except me having fun with a scene I happen to be enjoying. I take a character I wanna have fun with, say "Go do that important thing so we have a plot while you show off how cool you are", then add random ideas that sound generic but fun to act as story beats. They went to a town, they got beat up by monsters, they discovered a super power, they make friends.

I take breaks between writing the story to obsess over other stuff, then come back when I have an epiphany in the shower a month later and quickly resolve the current arc in order to jump them into the next one. Like, there's still continuity, they mention "Hey we just went through something, wanna talk about your feelings?" "Not really man, wanna go on a quest for that Macguffin and uncover our deep-seated issues that way?" "Sure!" But the story follows a barely-connected story beat with side characters and new world building for the new adventure. And then this happens over and over.

Then I come back, one day.

I'm 600 pages into this Sysphian writing style of starting arcs that have barely any organization yet undeniable continuity and I think to myself, "Man, what if I just start the whole thing over now that I know where the story KINDA goes." So I start writing my second draft...like it's a fanfic of my original draft. I can do whatever the hell I want with these quirky facts about the characters, maybe translate one hobby into a backstory, take this tragic fact about the backstory and make it into an actual trait that defines how they react to situations, take these two characters that would TOTALLY get along and make them friends, I can take a character who should be getting introduced way later and just introduce them now!

And then it's...it's good? It's something I would genuinely read without cringing at??

It's got foreshadowing and interpersonal conflict and secret passions and even more secret traumas and it's humorous and the introduction of characters or quests actually seem to...make sense??? Like oh shit there's actually a REASON we want this thing, it's not a Macguffin anymore! Oh crap these two characters who were later revealed to be related can have a really interesting dynamic if I introduce them like they know from the beginning they're related instead of dropping it like the most casual thing ever in an arc 300 pages later??? These two characters are prominent figures so they would likely get along but have SO much sass between their one braincell. Ya know, this guy would be a really great guy for them to talk to in order to solve that weakness they have, but they wouldn't fix it because they don't get along. OH MY GOD I COULD SHIP THESE TWO AND IT WOULD BE PERFECT -

And what I get is a story where a lot of things have changed, mainly plot-wise, but the bare bones of the former story is still there. I think "Would this character know anything about this topic?" and then think "Well I made them an inventor with a backstory like this, so maybe they wouldn't know it directly, but they'd know a famous story about it" or "Yeah, that knowledge works with their backstory. Actually, if I take that thing I can expand it into this whole other thing. Wait, that means they would definitely know this other character. Oh, they would NOT get along with this character, how can I get THEM in the same room?"

Bonus, because my draft is so long, I feel the natural urge to be like "I wanna write the most exciting scene RIGHT NOW, how do I skip over all the fluff to get to the stuff I wanna WORK with" and so I've written a way more interesting hook that feels more natural jumping into the middle of their lives. I don't have to have the long-winded backstory from birth to the present, but now I can have them reference their backstory as more of a mystery to the characters they just meet - who are learning at the same time as the audience. I can think about how this character perceives that backstory and chooses to describe it, how another who was related might see it differently, and make it unclear who had the more accurate recounting since, ya know, I didn't actually write it beat for beat in this version!

The characters sometimes evolve into something completely different from my original telling - and I have NO IDEA how but I'll take it man! I had a shy and nice character get introduced as a more mysterious but knowledgeable and competent character because I had finally figured his personality out later on. He's still a tragic and kind person, but now he's being introduced to someone who doesn't know him and I get to see how yo he would be so much cooler if THIS was the side of him we saw FIRST. This is how he acts to strangers, rather than bearing his heart and true personality on the first go around because in the first draft I just wanted to get to the part where we're already going with his true version.

This is just how I write fanfiction. This character had this thing about them, but what if it was introduced like THIS?!

Basically I'm an AU OC writer at heart. Ask me to pull a story outta my ass and you'll get the equivalent of burnt toast, but ask me to write a fanfic of my own characters and I am a Master Chef in my natural habitat making a buffet. Why does my brain work like this? Am I the only one that does this?

#writing #writing thoughts #truly the fanfic writer within will always reign supreme #fanfic but with OCs #just shower thoughts #2am thoughts #i wanna read this newfangled fanfiction of my story! it's way better than the original!#wait I actually have to write it

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valeriianz · 7 months ago

Note

For the fic writer asks:

4. Obviously you did research for BitB. I'd love you to ramble about it if you like I'm sure you've got STORIES

5. Did you outline it?

7. How'd you decide it would be Hob's pov?

25-27 I'd love to know a/some favorite lines, details, and any lore you might want to share

omg TJ what wonderful questions! thank you!! this is going to get LONG!

4: Rambling about research!

do you wanna see a screen shot of my bookmarks under my "band au" folder?

man, and that's only what could fit on the screen.

there is... SO MUCH i chose to ignore for this fic. ideas that i had to drop, lines or extra details about the other band members equipment. more logistics, what Lucienne actually does, what Mervyn has to put up with as the new touring stage manager... i realized very early on that i couldn't possibly cram all this (super cool and eye opening) information into the fic and still keep reader's interest and, most importantly, to not stray away from the fact that this is a dreamling fic. whenever i felt myself getting carried away with a side character or job or even social media numbers, gossip, outside POVs, i had to reign myself in and get back on track. there will be time for exploring everything i missed in side stories after BitB is finished. i just hope i still have the energy to write it all.

once, i was so deep into research that after publishing chapter 2, i went into work and when my chef asked what "GA" meant on my prep list, i answered with full confidence, "general admission."

(it means "get ahead.")

the worst part of this entire writing process is im still learning new shit. i havent rewatched or read a lot of what i've saved because, to be very honest, i was feeling a little burnt out. it's why we're kinda full steam dreamling now. it's why ive been glossing over a lot of technical stuff and being vague about conversations amongst the crew/not including it at all. i don't prefer ignoring my research, but at the end of the day i want to still enjoy writing this fic and finish it. even if i can't be as descriptive and detailed and nuanced as i used to be.

5: Did you outline the fic?

(also asked by @hardly-an-escape!)

i wouldn't call what i have a proper "outline," it's more like a 20k word document filled to the brim with notes that i skim at least a dozen times while i'm writing a new chapter (being in my brain is literally hell). i live multichapter life very dangerously. i copy and paste lines or sections (always scattered, never together! augh!) that are meant to go together and plop them in a new document titled "band au ch.#" and then i structure the chapter around what i want to happen.

but to answer this question in the plainest of terms: yeah. i know exactly what's going to happen up until the very end. even if its all in my head and the only concrete shit that's written down are beats/plot points. i'll figure out the rest later!

7: How'd you decide it would be Hob's POV?

i actually never even considered writing it from Dream's POV. this was my first fic in the fandom (which is so nuts to think about lol) and writing in Dream's POV sounded so scary lol. i also just thought Hob's would be easier because i have worked a few backstage shows, back in my college years. i figured eh, i can make this work. and i loved exploring how weird and mysterious musicians can be, from a normie's POV. making Hob a fan first and having him worry about developing a parasocial relationship... it was fun to explore.

25: Share your favorite line

oh god, i have so many haha.

“What are you thinking about?” starting in ch.2 and onward lmao

“It’s–” Dream laughs quietly, bitterly. “I don’t like change.” He says each word with emphasis, eyes trailing down to fixate somewhere past Hob. “And I still hold onto the things I can control, like my instruments–” his eyes swing up to regard Hob apologetically. “Or my clothes or my–” he brings a hand up and wiggles his fingers around his head. “My hair.” ch.4

"His majesty is pleased." ch.5

“You are obsessive,” he states, slow and cool and with a quiet smile cracking through his composure. “Just like me.” ch.7

“You look good.” Hob has to lean in to say so, unwilling to raise his voice amongst the roar of the fans. ch.11

“Del looks like porcelain, but she’s actually made of steel.” Desire swirls the contents of their glass before pushing their shoulders back with a deep breath. “She's tougher than all of us.” ch.11

“Everything. I want…” his fingers tighten in Hob’s hair, pulling him closer, speaking against his lips. “…Everything.” ch.14

26: Share your favorite detail

how intentionally coy Dream behaves. i love keeping him a mystery and deciding when and how much to allow his intentions to peek through has been so fun lol.

Despair is in fact covered in tattoos and piercings! i say this because i feel like sometimes i forget lmao. (but also her and Hob don't interact much so. my bad haha).

Delirium's constant explosion of color in the way she dresses <3

Hob's dedication to his job, Dream, and the people he cares about the most. i don't care if people think i'm making him too soft and good, im gonna project on that man and make him a sweet, sweet simp lmao

and ah, this doesn't matter anymore, and i kinda regret doing it but. i originally had Dream's favorite bass all black but the pickguard was white. so it actually looked like Jessamy. not gonna lie when @designtheendless drew it all black i decided i liked it better that way. and truly i do. that's when i went back to ch.1 and changed it haha. to actually see the guitar with Dream, all done up sparkling black and purple flecks... gosh it's just so him. but then i got up to the reveal that the guitar's name was Jessamy and i was like, "oh, right." lmao. no one seems to care so i'll leave it be.

27: Share a piece of lore you made up for the story

i have a lot lmao. and this post is already so long... im hoping i can get to some if not all of it in side fics in the future. but for now, here's some that's more like headcanons but:

Dream hates flying. he can full on go into panic attacks on the plane if he allows himself to get into his own head.

this was mentioned briefly in ch.4, while Dream was discussing the formation of the band, but Despair was in another band before joining Endless. she is the only character in the fic who gets to keep her English roots (lol sorry) and is the oldest in the band (30).

all of the band members ages: Dream, Desire, and Death are all 28 and Delirium is 22.

Dream can experience subdrop after going too hard during a performance.

Dream paints his own nails, it's very therapeutic.

as an exercise, i explored my own headcanons for Dream in this verse in a word doc, and one thing i will share from it that you might find interesting: If I were to ever give Dream a theological values, I would describe him as a satanist. He is a physical and pragmatic person, nonconforming, and although he is introverted, he enjoys being a part of a community (he loves his band).

also found this in my notes: How Desire and Dream got along was Death making them fight it out. Hob raises an eyebrow “like in a brawl?” He couldn't imagine Desire throwing hands. “No, in a pillow fight that escalated in hair pulling and verbal taunts.”

fic writer asks

#yooooo #this took me a long time to answer lol #i gotta go to bed but #THANK YOU SO MUCH TJ!!#dreamling #(why not. there's a lot here let put it out into the main tag!)#fic: bolt in the blue #im so satisfied ahhh thanks again #:)

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neko-loogi · 1 year ago

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Alright, I'mma give my opinion again. This time with Hazbin Hotel..

So I saw the trailer for Hazbin Hotel a few days ago and honestly, I am so disappointed. Like, you're telling me I waited years for them to release a trailer for the series, and this is all we get??

I'm not saying it wasn't enough, no, on the contrary, I think they revealed way too much. But what I mean is, I was expecting something else, because this ain't it, chief.

***

Alright so first off, we have the voices. I'mma be hella honest with y'all, this shit sounds unfinished, as in, it sounds like Viv got confused and published the behind the scenes instead of the finished product because omfg, the voices sound bad.

I genuinely don't understand the weird obsession Viv has with hiring celebrities or broadway actors into her shitty shows, it's not like she's rich enough to afford that- plus she does this often, doesn't that mean it affects the budget of the show? (I don't know much about that stuff so bear with me).

It's funny cuz, she hires these super famous celebrities to voice characters in her shows, but she doesn't need to, like, you can be a professional, but that doesn't necessarily mean you're a great VA. It almost feels like she does that because she wants to feel important, she wants to show off like "Oh look at me, I have celebrities voicing my characters! Aren't I cool?"

But anyway, going back to the voices, I have to say this, my least favorite are Alastor and Angel Dust. I just think it's absolutely ridiculous that Viv got rid of the pilot VAs just to replace them with broadway actors, only for them to make the characters sound flat and emotionless.

Like, it's funny because she makes these broadway actors imitate the voices from the pilot, however it doesn't come naturally for these actors and it shows. It almost feels like they have no idea what they're doing. It legit sounds like they're reading the script but not putting any effort into it. (Y'know how people shit on anime dubs because they don't sound good or whatever? That's exactly how I feel about this-).

The next thing I wanna talk about is the animation. Don't get me wrong from what I've seen, in some moments the animation looks alright, but other times it looks choppy as hell. I thought this show was supposed to be more 'professional' since they literally got A24 and Bento Box ent. for this. But yeah, all I can say is, the animation hasn't changed at all, the only thing that is slightly different is the art style but aside from that, the animation still sucks.

And finally, the last thing I wanted to discuss is the plot of the series. So as we all know, in the Pilot, it was established that Charlie (along with Vaggie) opened the Happy Hotel in hopes of redeeming sinners so that they can go to heaven because Hell was too overpopulated (plus the whole extermination thing). But the whole point of the plot was that she wasn't entirely sure she could actually do it or if it was even possible, and that's what made the plot more interesting back then. But here? It's absolute garbage. Not only did the trailer basically reveal way too much information already (before the series could even come out yet), but the plot was changed entirely!

Like I mentioned, Charlie's motives were to redeem sinners, but here she's more focused on having some kind of war with heaven/the angels. And that's the thing, now that we know that heaven is a thing in this series, plus the inclusion of Adam, it just makes the series feel so predictable, because now we know that the sinners can be redeemed, which beats the entire purpose of the show. It's like, "Hell bad, but heaven is worse" and "Good VS. Bad!!", cliche type of thing. You think a series 'made for adults' would have a more interesting plot than a kids show, but nah, we get these basic ass levels of writing. I swear a fucking five year old could come up with something better and far more creative than this nonsense-

***

So yeah, I'm honestly hella disappointed that this is what the series has turned into. I had high hopes for Hazbin Hotel (since Helluva ain't shit-), but nope, it turns out, Viv is capable of making herself look even more stupid by completely butchering her own series. Hell, I actually have Amazon Prime, but I am probably not even gonna watch this shit, I'll just wait till some dumbass on YouTube uploads the first episode or something stupid like that (so that I can watch it and critique it later). Because I know that someone definitely will.

Anyway, that's all for today, thank you for reading my dumb post- alright bye!

#anti vivziepop #vivziepop critical #vivziepop criticism #vivziepop critique #hazbin hotel critical #hazbin hotel criticism #hazbin hotel critique #spindlehorse criticism #spindlehorse critical #///#by neko loogi #do not repost #neko loogi rambles 😬#neko loogi rants😔

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queen-kassiopeia-the-5th · 4 months ago

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So. I've just finished readimg all of the cosmere books, so here are some of my (personal) opinions. Let me know yours!

Favorite Book(s):

1. The Final Empire - Got me into the cosmere (even though Elnatris was the first Sanderson book I ever read)

2. Words of Radiance - Favorite Stormlight book

3. Tress of the Emerald Sea

Least favorite Book(s):

Rythm of War

Favorite Novella:

Edgedancer

Least Favorite Novella:

Mistborn the Secret History. A little too disjointed writing for my liking.

Favorite Character(s):

1. Kelsier - He got me inveated in the Final Empire in the first place. I also don't think his actions during that book are wrong. In my opinion, a drastic change of social norms and millenia of abuse and exploitation can only happen only thrpugh complete obliteration. I never understood how him targeting and killing nobles, complete and utter selfish villians who never chnaged their ways (we see them keeping the same patterns that kept them in power in A Well of Assention and Hero of Ages, and even still in Era 2). Him being a "con man" is also not really how I see it. His actions inspired they drive needed for Skaa and Vin to fight, both agains tge Rold Ruler and Ruin. He also kept on fighting and helping from the afterlife.

He (and all Scadrians) are being fashined into villians, as Thaidakar, even though the Ghostbloods protect Scadriel, where Harmony really couldn't. In mnay cases I agree with his idiologies, and if I had his powers, I too would strike down amyone in my way and thpse who threated those I care about. Also him suddently not caring for Marsh, when in Final Empire we saw they had a straine dyet loving brotherly relationship... But he will always live as Kelsier Final Empire in my mind and I love him.

2. Wayne!!!

3. Dalinar - Yes, parts of his actions annoy me, but he's the sort of character I gravitate towards. Also the ending of Oathbringer is *chefs kiss*. [For those asking, I love Kaladin, and want to give him the world, but he's a tad too idealistic for me, and our moral compasses don't align. I love his development and goign through all his struggles and uplifting those around him, but I disaagree with some of his actions, he's too clean cut for me]

Honorable mention - Hoid!!! He doesn't show up too much, but he's a delight when he's on page. So glad he inserted himself into the plot of Stormlight so we can see his full powers.

Powers I'd Most like to Have:

Allomancy. I work with metals on the daily (material science engeneer). I'd take only one sort of allomancy or feruchemy, too. Maybe only pewter, for an energy boost during the day, or a coppermind. Don't want to bond a Spren as fun as it sounds. My moral compass doesn't seem to align with amy of them, and I don't want the guild of killing one in breaking an oath. Also I'm not altruistic enough to be a Radiant. But yeah, all magic systems are cool and it's hard to pick only one that I'd want [*cough* *cough* Hemallurgy *cough*]

World I'd Most like to Live In:

Scadriel post catacendre and maybe Sel, now that the Reod is undone.

Group of People I'd like to Hang Out With:

The Wax and Wayne gang! Get me all the Kandra, Steris, Marasi, Allik, Renette and her wife. We're getting wasted! (And Steris has hangover cures in her handbag, and probably a grande launcher, just in case).

I'd love to listen to Hoid telling stories, actually, and do some shananigans with him.

As much as I love the crew in Mistborn Era 1 and Bridge Four, I'm a little too intimidated to hang out with either of them. But I think I'd have a blast with Rock.

Favorite non Human Race:

Kandra

Best Worldbuilding:

Stormlight Archive

Best Book Ending:

Hero of Ages.

Honorable mentions - Oathbringer, Sunlit Man.

Best Companions:

Aviars

#cosmere reading #cosmere #cosmere opinions #stormlight archive #mistborn #mistborn era 1 #mistborn era 2 #elnatris #brandon sanderson #warbreaker #tress of the emerald sea #the sunlit man #edgedancer #cremposting #arcanum unbounded #wax and wayne #kelsier

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midwestemoismid · 4 months ago

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Do you ever love a character so much you sorta steal your entire personality from them,,

Cuz like I'm obsessed with Nicole from class of '09, if sorta stolen my whole humor from her, Which isn't really a good thing because shes kinda a piece of shit, the game revolves around her being a horrible person or trying to kill herself or something like that, I'm not like as mentally ill as her, but my humor has evolved to be similar to Nicole and ive sorta had this not care attitude. I've also been really jokingly mean to one of my best friends (he knows its a joke, thats our humor) but I accidentally did that to my little brother and felt SO bad lmao,, (he said something very obviously and I loudly go "yeah no fucking shit bitch" then started apologizing profusely) This other time I was playing blooket w/ that same friend and I did something that made him eat a fake burger and I went really loud "have this fucking burger you fat ass bitch" and hje just stared at me like wtf,, and the other person on the call (who I just met) was SHOCKED.

i'm not a bad person,, hes okay with me making those jokes btw

well im sorta a bad person but i'm working on that

i sorta hate having obsessions over character because i want to BE THEM. and it sucks even more when theyre a horrible person--and when theyre a girl,, cuz like i want to de-transition and become a terrible person and chane my name to Nicole WHAT THE FUCK WHY I DONT KNOW and like i had an alt acc on tiktok where i used she/her and named myself nicole and it was like a class of 09 fanpage sorta. and like i dont wanna be a bad person nor do i wanna hurt people feelings or be addicted to drugs AT ALL but like NICOLE🙏🙏🙏

this always happens when i have some sort of obsession. i dont typically have favorites but when i do its like an obsession

and like one other problem with being obsessed with nicole is i accidentally obsess over mental illness and (stuff i shouldnt obsess over), wich is really bad and unhealthy.

I gain little obsessions over certain things, like right now im REALLY obsessed with a game called "bad parenting" and it's a really really sad game. I wont spoil it but its genuinelly depressing and made me cry. after i saw it i wanted to hug my dad and tell him i loved him for being a good dad. ive been listening to the backround song on repeat for a bit, i might even draw fanart of it idk,, but i feel like i shouldnt be hyper obsessed with it

as a kid i also was really obsessed with "salad fingers" wich had a sadish theme to it, i kinda forget the plot but i thought it was interesting and how the main charecter was kinda messed up.

I also really like "little miss fortune" wich was also really sad. again i dont remember the plot my childhood is sorta a blur and i dont remember it well

"Sally face" is another sad game i liked. not gonna spoilt it but i loved the supernatural bit and there was a lot of death.

I also really love horror movies, ESPECIALLY horror movies that go into psychology. Like for example, saw is pretty interesting because its cool to see if people would rather cut of an arm or die. I know it's fake but it's still really cool.

Theres a lot i find interesting but i dont wanna sound like im actually insane lol

This ran went in so many placed i forgot what the original post was about😭 took me abt 2 and 1/2 class period to wright

If you read this all, thanks! If you relate reblog or comment (or make a new post and tag me) and tell me what charecter you relate to/obsess over

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respectthepetty · 8 months ago

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Hej Pet! How's life treating you? Well, I hope.

I saw you had mentioned the use of alternating background music in the gym scene of Wandee Goodday...which I think means you watched the show with sound (!!)...and I've also just seen that you will be watching The Untamed, so I thought I'd just message because with your proclivity for watching shows on mute (although maybe Wandee Goodday has changed that...?) I thought I'd mention that there is a particular plot point that sort of requires having sound on for The Untamed...or at least you should know that there is a sound-related plot point. I'm rambling 🤦🏽‍♀️ but I think you probably understand. Anyway, I wish you the best for your June month. It is the best month after all...not least because it's also my birthday month 😏💛

Did you just greet me with a Swedish "hello"?

Well, life is treating me a lot better since you popped into my (in)box with that little treat!

But so I don't raise my heart rate up again by getting too excited, let me actually focus on what you're saying and not that's it's you saying it even though you noticed the tiny detail that I'm watching Wandee Goodday with the sound on. No big deal. I'm being totally chill about that. My heart isn't beating faster or anything.

But anywho *deep breath* um, yeah, I'm watching both My Stand-In and Wandee Goodday unmuted and at normal speed, which I think is contributing to my elevated heart rate. It's a lot of stimulation to absorb, but at least I completely understood where Yak was coming from hearing Dee moaning, um, working out.

Which random sidenote, but Idol Factory does the best job of captioning sound, so I never get too overwhelmed watching its shows by hearing moaning since I can just read that a person is moaning.

I'm rambling. *plays with my necklace*

Sooooo yeah, um, what was I supposed to be responding to? Um . . . The Untamed! Yeah. That show! An anon in my inbox told me this:

What I'm getting from you two is that I will be confused at least for the first two episodes, I need to have the sound on for all FIFTY episodes, and I'm going to have to connect a lot of dots?

Awesome. Fantastic. Sounds like a plan! Thank goodness Inn and Great sold me on this by being unnecessarily beautiful at GMMTV's work retreat because I'm a bit more nervous now than I was before.

But I made a promise so I'm watching Love in the Air (and if that goes well, Love Sea), my old nemesis SOTUS, and this beast of a show!

With the sound on.

The entire time.

Cool.

Cool cool cool.

Thanks for warning me, Daddy, so I don't miss vital information, and because of that, let me be the first to give you a very early "Happy Birthday"!

My heart rate is completely normal, and I'm not at all thinking about how amazing you are. 💙💛

#I'm not going to be weird in the tags #I'm going to be completely normal #I'm just going to tell you that I hope you enjoy the entire month for your birthday because you deserve it #see! completely normal daddy #*I wanna smush your face and watch you eat a cake I made you that looks like a disaster but tastes delicious while I play with your hair*#soooo normal

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queerwritersingerdramaqueen · 4 months ago

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TUMBLR, I WILL MAKE YOU POST THIS

PREVIEW:

AKA-NO-KEN YOU ACTUAL PHSCHIC HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GUESS ALL MY GOD CASTINGS CORRECTLY???

AGAIN, WISDOM SAGA SPOILERS SO READ AT YOUR OWN RISK. ALSO MAYBE A TRIGGER WARNING FOR LOVE IN PARADISE CAUSE THAT WAS MORE THAN I WAS FUCKING EXPECTING.

THIS IS SHERLOCK AND BILL'S FUCKING SAGA NOW BITCHES BROS AND NON-BINARY HOES. AND AGAIN, I'M FANGIRLING AS I GO.

So, with where we left off, William's having a minor relapse in his mental state but it won't become too much of a plot point/serious thing. He and Moran are on funky terms but if there is no "reconciliation" in later sagas then We'll figure that out when we get there. Anyway, this saga ain't about him.

(ALSO, I MISSED A FUCKING OPPOURTUNITY

VON HERDER AS TIRESIAS, IM A FOOL)

Anyway, lets get started.

The Wisdom Saga:

Legendary - BILL IS HERE FUCKERS. SHERLIAM'S ADPOTED SON IS GONNA BE LEGENDARY. I really like how this parallels with Canon when Bill only knew William as a genius professor and Sherlock's actually the one who introduces them in a way. It'll set up nicely for when we get to "I can't help but wonder" and Telemachus/Bill has to toss up with the fact that his Dad just removed the twenty year problem but he did also kill a bunch of people (you know, like in canon.). So this starts out with the lights slowly coming in and Bill's "room" has a chair and a few other easily moveable props. This is a very dancey number I'm finding so these props are probably gonna get taken off stage so there can be actors milling around for Telemachus to interact with, I think he'd be mostly weaving between them trying to avoid them while they keep swiping at him. The majority of suitors can be off the stage but Antinous and a few others are up there ready for the "Whatcha gonna do about it, champ?" The lights would change on Boy to a red colour. It would be so cute seeing Billy fight for Sherlock's Honour. I think something really cool that could happen is when Telemachus sings "somebody help me" the lights flash blue for a second like Athena has heard his plea. and at the very end of the song, he punches Milverton square on the nose (in the fake way of course).

Little Wolf - My big idea for this that would absolutely not transfer over to a regular production of Epic the musical would be that Antinous/Milverton is not the one fighting Telemachus/Bill. I cannot really see Milverton fighting for himself and would definitely have lackey's doing it for him; but outside of this AU Antinous absolutely fights for himself. But yeah, Milverton mocks the shit out of Bill while he's fighting somebody. The lights stay red while the suitors and Milverton are doing their thing. When Athena appears the lights turn blue like fighting of the panic of being in a fight. I think this is one of those moments where its so fun having Sherlock as Athena and Penelope cause it's like "Don't worry baby, Mama's here to help." But, onto the super cool crossover intertexuality talk I can't seem to do right now, Sherlock as Athena fits very nicely cause he, alongside William, helps Bill get into the university; so Sherlock being the one helping in this fight reminds me of that. And Athena's "I've no respect for bullies" reminds me of his disdain for Milverton and his methods of blackmail. ALSO, HER PIANO IN THAT PART IS SO FUCKING GOOD I FUCKING ASCENDED. PAIRING IT WITHT HE DRUMS THAT WAY, WHO DOES JORGE THINK HE IS. In a way, this is like showing how Penelope would like to react to her suitors beating up her son (it just popped into my head but kind of like a batman meme, Penelope dressing up as the goddess of wisdom to fuck up her son's bullies). Athena's whole solo there sounds a lot like Sherlock when he was talking to Irene. And when the fight ends and Antinous says Penelope needs to pick a suitor, Athena/Sherlock is very disturbed before he helps Bill up.

We'll be Fine - The thing I love the absolute most about this musical is exploring Sherlock's side of this whole fiasco they were in and giving him a chance to vent some of this frustrations. Because it wasn't easy on him either and he might blame himself a little bit for not being able to help more. Bill knows a little bit about it from gossip and rumour and being a part of the Epic cast for a little while, not too much but between the two of them, Bill understands that Sherlock is letting out a bit of his frustration with the previous problem and the repeat that seems to be occurring, because he's super smart like that (I say seems because in real life, it won't last that long and William is probably gonna be ok and reconciled with Moran by the time we get there. It'll hopefully make sense once we get to the next saga but I just can't keep knocking this dude over he needs to start healing and giving him a less self-jeopardising problem to fight). Even though he and William have worked through a fair bit of what happened and their still going really strong, Sherlock is still worried. Sherlock's super soft on Bill because he's so similar to William. Bill, while sticking to the script, is just subtly reassuring him that it's ok, they'll get through this rough patch and they'll be fine. Sherlock doesn't need to be the first responder. A little bit of it probably comes out as Bill saying "William wouldn't want you to beat yourself up over this," especially when he mentions Athena's friend (William and Bill are also probably really close friends at this point, don't tell me William wouldn't take him under his wing immediately after they're introduced). When Athena calls him a good kid, Sherlock ruffles his hair and then Bill makes a move like someone's calling him and runs off, leaving him for the next part.

ALRIGHT I'M HAVING FUCKING ISSUES WITH TUMBLR RIGHT NOW SO STAY TUNED FOR PART TWO BECAUSE ANYTHING LONGER THAN THIS WONT FUCKING POST OR SAVE AS A DRAFT.

@aka-no-ken I'M COMING SWEETIE AND I'M BRINGING MY WORK WITH ME JUST BEAR WITH ME

#yuumori #moriarty the patriot #yuukoku no moriarty #sherliam #william james moriarty #sherlock holmes #billy the kid #bill hunting #he doesn't have a tag :'(#john watson #mary morstan #miss hudson #george lestrade #HE DOESN'T HAVE ONE EITHER???#might come back and clean up at a later date #epic the musical #epic the wisdom saga #Epic X Yuumori AU #look! I made a tag for it!

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thecoolerliauditore · 3 months ago

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Well! This is probably better formatted as an ask than as a reply to your comment, so... tumblr user thecoolerliauditore! Whatre your "#thoughts" on adolesence of utena?🎤

oh boy. mic'd up. okay crazy

(oh my god i wrote fucking a lot im sorry)

So first things first. Enjoyable movie! I liked it and it's high point for me is definitely the art, cinematography and overall spectacle. And I'm always happy for more Utena, so I'm very glad I got to watch it!

But just from that you can probably gather that I. Might not have the highest opinion of the movie otherwise.

Don't get me wrong it's still a very solid and fun watch and I liked it but I just think it's vibe is very. distinctly different from the series? It actually reminds me a lot of what I expected Utena to be before I watched it, if that says anything. Very artsy and symbolism-y, but the characters felt distinctly less human than in the show.

Utena herself I actually think is the biggest downgrade from show to movie, maybe as a consequence of so much of it being mainly from Anthy's POV (not a bad thing Ily Anthy <33) but her motivations felt very. ??????? to me several times in the movie. Especially when it came to her relationship with Anthy and Touga. The car thing is like absolutely my favourite thing to come out of the movie and I rewatch that car wash sequence and chase scene sooooo much but I do think it's funny she Literally turns into a vehicle for Anthy's development.

Anthy is cool I don't have any beef with Anthy and I never will. Her flashback scenes are really awesome, the sound design in this movie especially in those scenes is sooooo‼️‼️‼️🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥 I personally don't really know what to make of the "sequel" read of this movie but I do think it makes the most sense for how Anthy acts here.

Mixed feelings with Akio. On one hand I think it's very fitting that Anthy-in-recovery would now see through his facade and see him as pathetic instead of menacing, but on the other hand he really just feels like a complete separate entity to show Akio. His scenes are really funny though.

I think my hater tendencies might have a strong basis in the fact that I think it. grits teeth. understandably considering the runtime sidelines my favourite characters from the show -- Wakaba gets reduced to the plot-irrelevant best friend role her Black Rose episode worked to challenge, Nanami is entirely erased and Shiori. Is maybe the one I have the most thoughts about because they essentially gave her an entire new thing to do independent of her plot with Juri and it's??Actually really awesome to me. Like she WOULD is the thing she WOULD do this and I've talked about before how hilarious it is that while she's literally having sex with a guy all she talks about is Juri.

But the plot treats her with this? Idk if I'm just not getting it or what but it feels like she's treated very unfairly and her comphet isn't acknowledged as comphet. It's almost like they needed someone to fill the mean girl role and they knew Nanami wouldn't go down well so they shoved Shiori in there and said good enough.

The shot of her license plate being run over by the remaining black cars is heartbreaking to me but like. Hey Juri hey so your crush is um Fucking Dead yeah uh you should know?

Idk just. very strange treatment of her character that feels very anti-utena to me. Her depth is hinted at but not explored, and what we're left with is kind of. Making me sad.

Speaking of Shiori the sex scene with Touga might be my favourite thing to come out of the movie other than the final car sequence. It's not only gorgeously animated but horrifyingly portrayed, I always read it as Touga forcing himself to focus on the butterflies to avoid having to acknowledge his rape and thus they're shown so significantly in the flashback. Idk if that's. Right but I think it's neat.

Touga himself is. Interesting I guess? Idk it feels again very anti-utena to me to even attempt at redeeming Touga or making him more sympathetic when the message I walked away from the original show was that his actions are horrible but they can't really be judged by me, an audience member, when he too is a victim of the system. No problem with the CSA, I think it makes enough sense in addition to the rest of the character, but turning him into literally an innocent child who died trying to play prince instead of acknowledging that he is 1. an abuser and 2. still a victim of the system who can one day move on from it makes me feel. Again a little sad. Out of all the characters he feels the most detached from the original to me and I honestly wonder what the intention was here, especially if we're looking at this as a sequel to the show.

I think other people might have stronger feelings regarding Touga and Utena's kiss scene than me. Personally I just umm. Good for them but thumbs down hashtag just my opinion

The other student council members are fine, I think. Cuts galore but whatever it's a movie. I do think it's a massive shame that they had Utena just straight up beat Juri when one of my favourite things about their dynamic in the show for me was that she never actually beat her fair and square. But whatever man. Kozue is Also Here.

The film is also like. I don't like using this word because wOw UtENa Is CoNFUsInG but it is genuinely like. Very incoherent? It feels like to me a a list of scattered unused ideas from the show and some semblance of an epilogue for Anthy that got mushed together with some really beautiful visuals.

I don't really get who the target audience is? If I hadn't watched the show I'd be confused and lost. If I have watched the show I'm still confused and lost but for entirely different reasons.

The scene where Utena chokes Anthy the fuck out and then the really beautiful iconic dance sequence embody this to me where these scenes are GORGEOUS on their own and make my brain tick but the first time I watched it I was like. ???? weren't you fucking her ass up a moment ago.

Utena with short hair is cool I like.

I think that's about it holyyyy. Okay awesome I'm sorry man.

#asks #i see alot of ppl compare adolescence with eoe and i just #idk man. utena to me already ended pretty perfectly #whereas evas original ending i loved. but it was very much screaming for more expansion and adaptation #adolescence is gorgeous and it also feels like to me describing to someone #the plot and themes of utena and having that person make an utena movie based off of your description #and they're REALLY GOOD. at what they do. but they havent actually watched utena

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backgroundagent3 · 5 months ago

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hey!! hope you're doing well!!

i know you're reading funny story right now (ahhh) and probably have a long tbr so there's no pressure to read this but i just read the ex vows by jessica joyce and i think you might like it!!!

it reminded me a lot of happy place in that it focused on a found family of friends and how they changed over the years, and it was a second chance romance, and there's a wedding they're prepping for, but it also felt completely like its own new and different thing! i think it's one of the best non-emily henry romances i've ever read and it's the kind of romance that emily henry writes, where it's more emotional and focuses a lot on the character journey.

anyways, since happy place is your favorite emily henry i thought i'd let you know about it!!

Hii! I'm doing good! Thank you so much for the recommendation, I always struggle a lot finding new books to read. I've got a couple of books I'd like to read first, but it sounds so good, I'm so excited!! I just loved the whole vibe of Happy Place, and I love reading about found families, so I'll add it to my tbr.

I'm almost done with Funny Story and on the one hand I can't wait to finish it and tell you about it, but I also never want it to end!

Also I forgot to tell you I finally finished Daisy Jones & The Six!! It's the book that's taken me the longest to read, which is weird cause it's so good! I guess I was really busy but anyways. I loved the format so much, it's so unique, and it also makes it so easy to read! I have a really short attention span, so a book that's basically all dialogue is perfect for me. Some spoilers ahead!

The characters were so funny to me. I went in thinking it was gonna be a found family but then it turns out they all kind of hate each other. They're all so unique and fun to read about. Camila and Karen are so cool, and Warren's the comedic relief, and Pete's just some guy, and Billy's insufferable, and Daisy's also kind of insufferable, but I still loved her. I've seen a lot of people hating on Eddie, and I genuinely don't understand it?? Yes he had a short fuse, but also yes he was justified (at least in my opinion. I hated how Billy kept screwing him over).

I also loved the "where are they now bit", because here I am thinking Pete is dead throughout the whole book, and then it turns out he just had no interest in being part of the interview (which is very cool of him, I too would try to forget about my incredibly dysfunctional found family). The Julia plot twist was so cool, and I couldn't believe Camila was dead all along! I loved her so much. It was so satisfying seeing what their lives look like today, and every ending was very fitting for each character too.

Also loved reading about Karen and Graham, and even though I knew they wouldn't stay together, I was so invested, and I cried my eyes out at their ending. It's so heartbreaking, and you kind of see both POVs, which makes it even sadder.

I think it's just one of these books that leave you staring off into the distance for a while. Just seeing the lives they lead, and knowing that this is how rockstars' lives were actually like feels so special and sad and exciting, and I don't even know where I'm going with this but yeah. 10/10.

Thanks again for the recommendation, and I'd love to hear your thoughts on this book! I'll try to finish Funny Story asap (I'm almost done, for real this time). <3

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yeetus-feetus · 11 months ago

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de-aging au

Duke is a much smaller Duke one day, he's lost all his memories beyond the young age he is now and he's scared and confused. He doesn't know where is. But then there's Tim, his Robin! And suddenly everything is

The bats have no idea what's going on, but Duke refuses to go to anyone but Tim. He's also a little ball of energy bouncing off all the walls, and Tim is SO tired. "Robin- Tim, come play tag with me!"

One night Tim ends up passing out at his desk, a sleeping Duke cuddling into him on his lap.

Except when Duke wakes up Tim is small too. And he doesn't remember who Duke is!!

So Duke reintroduces himself and Tim let's himself be dragged downstairs to the actually Batcave!

Bruce is looking at them in absolute astonishment, they're so small!!

Damian laughs at Tim's smallness and Tim gives a cold glare. Maybe age can't change some things.

"where are Nightwing and the new Robin?" Tim asks.

"I'm Robin."

"no, I meant Jason!" Tim huffs and crosses his arms. Ah, he's so young he still believes Jay is Robin.

Duke is still clinging to him, but Tim can't bring himself to mind all too much.

Bruce doesn't know how to handle these boys, between a hyperactive Duke and an absolute menace Tim.

Dick tries to help, but even he can't keep up with the mischief and shenanigans they get up to together.

"dick pick us up!"

"yeah! Pick us up pick us up! And swing us around until we get dizzy!"

"again!"

It's time to bring out the big guns, and by that they mean calling Jason over to the manor.

Tim settles immediately, but Duke remains overly weary around the large man with guns strapped to his thighs. He's kinda scary.

But Tim likes Jason well enough. At some point he ends up cuddled up with Jason who's stretched out on the couch, and Duke is just a little bit jealous.

"hey stop hogging him! Tim is mine," Duke pouts.

Jason raises an eyebrow at the boy, and Tim tilts his head. "You know there's enough room for both of us up here, right? Jason is a lot bigger than he used to be."

Duke considers this. "Mm okay, but only because you're up there". And he climbs up into Jason's lap to cuddle into Tim's side.

It's calm for a moment, until Duke starts to fidget, not able to stay still for too long. Jason let's put an annoyed noise and looks at them over the top of his book. "Would you quit it I'm tryna read here".

"what are you reading?" Duke asks.

"Macbeth."

Tim scrunched his nose up. "Why are you reading that?"

"I like it. Reminds me of school", and Tim catches something in his tone that Duke absolutely doesn't.

"it sounds silly. Will you red it to us?"

Jason looks at the both of them for a very long moment before signing. "Sure, but you've gotta stay still, your knees are already in my ribs."

The three of them all end up falling asleep like that, tucked into the lounge and curled up together.

Except when they wake up in the morning, Jason is scrawny little boy, even smaller than Tim and Duke.

Tim explains what he can to the tiny Jason as Duke sneaks some snacks from the kitchen cupboard for them.

Cass catches them stuffing their faces with junk food and squeals. "Three baby brother's now!" And scoops them all up as the quick and try to squirm away.

"gotta tell B"

"wait who are you exactly?" Jason asks.

"big sister", Cass smiles and pets his curls.

"no way! Really? I've never had a big sister before", he exclaims.

Cass carries all three of them down to the Batcave because she's so strong and cool! And Jason can't believe he ends up with such a cool sister.

"Batman!!!" Jason shouts in pure excitement, and Bruce turns around and almost cries.

Because look how small!! Oh baby Jay lad!! So precious and smol!

"I think the de-aging syndrome may be contagious", Tim speaks up. "You should have us all properly quarantined until you can find a cure."

quarantine is fun, for Jason and Tim at least (tiny Tim is plotting revenge on whoever caused this, Jason is reading and occasionally shouting at the characters). Duke can't stand having to stay still in the same one room for so long.

idk where this is going, but consider this awesome 3am idea of mine

#It is literally 3am what am I doing lol #Why can't I get to sleep?#de aging #de aged tim #de aged Duke #de aged Jason #tim drake #duke thomas #jason todd #batfamily #batfam

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sleepyssnail · 4 months ago

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I have finished book one of Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation!!!

And holy moly am I tired. There's a lot more politics in this than Scum Villain, and while I like it, the amount of brainpower necessary to stay focused is way more than I anticipated!

But I like it. I've been giving my brother a play-by-play as I read, and some of my favorite highlights include:

Me: I don't want Lan Wanji to kiss Wei Wuxian My Brother: [raised eyebrows] My Brother: Oh? Me: I want Wanji to punch Wei Wuxian in the mouth, and THEN kiss him My Brother: Now THAT'S MORE LIKE IT!

[talking about the Cloud Recesses High School Arc] My Brother: Wei Wuxian sounds like an asshole. Me: HE KINDA IS!!!

[about Jin Ling] My Brother: IS THIS THE "My Uncle will hear about this!" KID? Me: YOU KNOW IT!

Me: Necromancy and corpses seems to run in the MXTX family. Wei Wuxian was a corpse and is now revived, and Luo Binghe— My Brother: I don't want to hear about Binghe molesting Shen's dead body again! Me: There's no PROOF he did anything like that! Actually, I read the extras and— My Brother: Oh I'm sure you read the extras. Me: ...he kidnapped Mu Qingfang to help keep Shen's body from decomposing My Brother: OH THAT'S ALL???

So yeah, I'm having a great time. Plot wise I'm fascinated by the Good Buddy's body parts and why there are two groups (the ones hiding and the ones making GB's parts obvious) not letting this poor dead dismembered guy take a break.

Wen Ning seems cool, and although it was a bit ew I'm absolutely enthralled by the needles that were in his head. Are there more? Wei Wuxian found them by looking at acu-points, so they could be suppressing or enhancing something in him? The brain is an interesting thing to tamper with, especially on a guy who's...dead...

Anyway, I love the world building, and the complexities, and my brother likes the intricacies of the power scaling and how there's a system and structure to it. NOW ONTO BOOK TWO!!

#andes mouth #ssnailstuff #mdzs #grandmaster of demonic cultivation #wei wuxian #lan wangji #jin ling #wen ning #svsss #scum villian self saving system #mu qingfang #luo binghe #shen qingqiu #my brother #andes updates #incorrect quotes #quotes #my life

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emwritesstuff · 1 year ago

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DYNAMO | Steve Rogers x Reader | part 2.

HYDRA has made their share of human experiments. You're just one of them. One of the least successful ones. One of the least functional ones. At least your life in the facility gave you a few things: unwavering resilience, cool(ish) superpowers and a great sense of humor. Steve Rogers would strongly disagree with that last one. A single chance encounter with him reluctantly brings you into the Avengers Compound, and you're determined to make his life as miserable as you can. Feeling's mutual.

AO3 | Masterlist | Playlist (coming soon!)

notes: part 2 is up! I've had this written for a while and I didn't want to wait to post hehehe. Not a lot of Steve interaction this time around though, just getting the plot going </3 (warnings: mentions of human experimentation, violence, cursing) (2.5K words)

2: CONDUCTIVE ACCORDS

“So, I’ve been thinking about what that thing you asked me,” Natasha slides on a stool next to Steve, and he raises one eyebrow at her, silently waiting for her to elaborate. He asks her lots of things, all the time. “on the girl with the electric powers. And then I remembered something.”

She opens the laptop she’s brought with her, and Steve feels dizzy by the lack of, well, anything, in her desktop area. He’s aware she has a meticulously crafted system, and that it never fails her, because she is Natasha Romanoff. But come on. There’s not even a Google Chrome on there.

After a couple of clicks a PDF is up on the screen. Medical records, and a picture attached. Yeah, that’s her alright-- he could spot that intense gaze anywhere.

He reads her name on the top of the page and tests it on his tongue.

“Or…A-7463. They refer to her mostly like this, anyway. She was part of an experiment to get people into manipulating energy.”

“Seems like they were successful.” He’d know. His body was still recovering from that.

“Almost…They wanted an army.” Natasha scrolls down, and more pictures come into view. They all have a bright red VERSAGEN stamp over the pages. Failures.

Kids.

That makes Steve grimace. “She was the only one who survived.”

“Yes. And when I came across these for the first time I thought--”

Steve’s head whips to Natasha’s face. His eyebrows meet at the center of his face.

“You knew? You kept this from us?”

“Well, it didn’t seem relevant—"

“An enhanced HYDRA agent walking around free isn’t relevant?”

“She’s not so much an agent – she’s more of a victim, don’t you think?” Natasha sighs, and closes the laptop. Steve perks up in his stool, staring down at her, even though he knew damn well that intimidation tactic wouldn’t work. But he wants her to know that he’s angry.

A victim. She didn’t seem like a victim when he was writhing on the ground like a fish out of water.

But those cries of pain he heard then weren’t his. His jaw was too busy being clenched shut to utter any sound.

Steve pinches the bridge of his nose, trying not to feel sympathy for the girl—woman, actually; from her files she is around 23 something now.

She’s HYDRA, still. And hasn’t turned herself over to justice. There was something off about it, Steve could feel it even though he couldn’t pinpoint it exactly.

“And I figured they’d have eliminated her already.” That brings Steve out of his own thoughts. She had been slipping through everyone’s fingers, then – and that was intriguing.

Maybe they could get her to collaborate. Take down HYDRA once and for all. Smash all the heads, burn all the tentacles to a crisp. From the inside, or at least with an insider on their court.

Even though their first impression was less than positive.

“We should take this to Fury and the others.”

“As if we needed another one of those.”

“Tony—”

“No, no, let ‘im talk, Natasha. Those what?” Bucky plants both hands – one human, one a prototype – on the table in front of him.

“Those—”

“Will this ever stop…” Steve shoots a sympathetic look at Wanda, though Tony’s remarks were never directed at her.

“Those what, Stark?”

Since Bucky Barnes had moved into the Avengers compound with the rest of them, his and Tony’s bickering had become a constant. They revel in civility until Tony decides he’s bored and it all begins again.

“Okay, children, you can stop now.” Fury drops a manila folder on the table – theatrics, because he never opens it, and instead uses a controller to turn on a screen behind him right after. It works though, as all of them turn to look at him. Steve rests his chin in his hand.

The face of a young A-7463 is up on the screen, staring right at him once again. A mystery wrapped inside a challenging gaze. Steve’s need to figure out just what she wanted and who she was grew more every time he looked at her.

Wouldn’t you like to know, Cap.

“…so we make her an offer she can’t refuse: freedom in exchange of information. Of course, with the bonus of not letting another superhuman on the loose.”

“Temporary and conditional pardon isn’t really freedom, Fury.”

“Well not everyone is as lucky as you, Barnes.” Bucky clenches his jaw at the same time Steve does his.

But it’s different. Bucky was a prisoner of war. He was forced into it. Who’s to say which side the girl was really on.

And those powers… she could be dangerous. Taking her down would probably need all their forces combined. They all agreed on that, at least.

But the plan was set: find her, convince her to cooperate in exchange of a conditional. Keep the girl and her powers under their watch and their control.

Finding her would be Natasha’s job. Steve and Sam would play the diplomatic part. Or they’d try.

He had a feeling that would be the hard part. Maybe they should cause a power outage in the vicinity just in case.

A-7463.

He thinks about your name again. It’s fitting for a hurricane, and he’s about to walk right into it.

There’s something humorous about having blue hair when you have electric powers.

Your hair is dyed a deep indigo now – and it should make you easier to spot in any normal circumstances, but not in Los Angeles, it doesn’t. This specific shade of blue was sold out in all of the Sally’s you walked in. So, like the sensible person you were, you broke into an apartment and stole a jar of it. You know, as you do.

The good thing about this city is that there were plenty of empty apartments for you to stay in – granted, most of them were just arranged to look livable, but a couch is a couch and for a night, that’s enough for you.

It’s not like you can rent an AirBnb.

Your mousey life has been going okay so far – since meeting Captain America over a week ago, you managed to stay lowkey, powers included. A blackout in L.A. would be a dead giveaway.

The balmy air of the city fills your lungs and clings to your skin as you munch on the other half of the burrito you got for lunch. You haven’t been able to eat much these days—something about the migraines left you with barely enough energy (ha) to keep yourself alive.

You’d never thought you’d miss the devils in lab coats and gas masks, but you almost do. It’s hard doing it yourself, and you don’t have the access to the drugs they used.

The view is pretty from the top of the building you’re sitting on, all windows and lights and cars going up and down the elevated highways. It’s nice. You wonder what New York would look like, but you don’t have the guts to go up there. Too close.

“Nice view you got there.”

A woman’s voice makes you jump and drop your food on the floor. You groan in frustration, but your breath gets caught up in your throat when the red hair comes into your line of vision.

Natasha Romanoff.

She’s leaning casually against the door that leads to the staircase down, and you know it’s to stop you from getting to it.

“Smart move with the hair. I almost got to three other people before finding you.”

You shrug, but inside you feel a little spark of pride.

“You made me drop my dinner.”

“Sorry about that. Although half a burrito barely sounds like dinner to me. I’ll buy you a decent meal—if you agree to sit and talk to me.”

The offer was tempting, and Romanoff’s face made you want to trust her. You were starving, really, until the realization that she was going through an effort to keep that expression on made you take a step back and your appetite vanish.

“Not hungry. And I’m not really a conversational kind of girl.”

“We have a proposition you might be interested in.”

“An apartment behind bars? Rogers already made that,” Casually averting your eyes back to the skyline, you begin scanning the horizon for the rest of them.

“They’re not here. Relax.”

“Lie.”

“Yes and no. They came with me, but they’re not close enough to ambush you.”

You don’t miss how she skirted around the actual reason she was here – a proposition. Bullshit.

“Right.”

“Not that I think they couldn’t—but they won’t. Trust me.” Her voice sounds much closer than before, and you turn your head to meet her intense gaze as your hairs stand on end. She’s sizing you up; you know her methods.

You had classes on all of them before you got out.

A former field of study standing right in front of you, casually inviting you for dinner. You wonder if she knows you feel like you’re caught in a mousetrap.

“Should I?”

Natasha chuckles lightly. “Not if you’re smart. Now, I am dying for that Pho across the street, so I’m heading there. Offer stands until I walk out that door, and I’m not leaving without you. Noodles or handcuffs, take your pick.” She sighs as you square your shoulders and keep looking ahead. You can hear the creak of the door at the same time your stomach rumbles.

Oh, screw it. Might as well take your chances.

“Wait—” You catch up with her a second before the door closes. When in Rome.

Well, L.A.

Turns out the choice between food or handcuffs wasn’t one. You inhaled the Pho like it was your first meal in days, because it kind of was, and then you got your wrists bound behind you on the next.

There was just a little scuffle in the middle.

Honestly, it wasn’t your fault; Captain America and the Falcon descended on you just as you were leaving the restaurant, your belly still warm from the food.

All you managed was a snarl as you leaped away from the three and gathered the block’s electricity on your body. One by one the lamps were out, and your face was illuminated by the familiar blue glow.

Captain America’s shield deflected your first blast before being hurled in your direction, lodging itself on the wall behind you. The next hit him right on the chest. Your lips curled into a smirk.

And then the energy vanished from your hands. As if evaporated into the air.

Groaning, you concentrated on bringing it back and directing yourself to your second target. Spots filled your vision, and your head felt like it was being split open.

It was a fraction of a second, and the Falcon took it. He knocked you over your middle and handcuffed you. And that was the end of it. You vision was too blurry to react and you had to make an effort to keep yourself conscious. The lights returned to the street. Shit.

Your powers are unreliable, you know as much. And now here you are, being strapped into a high-tech aircraft by none other than Mr. America himself.

“Absolutely fucking not.”

They had finally shared what the proposition was.

You could be arrested. Or you could be arrested, but with a pretty bow on top.

“You don’t have a third choice here. This the most generous we’ve been to anyone ex-hydra.”

“Except for Barnes.” Rogers clenches his jaw, now even more pissed than he was by your swearing. “Pity you and I are not besties then.”

His hairs are still unruly from your energy blast, and it makes you smirk. No hair gel is invincible.

Natasha must have caught a wave of it too, because you notice her usually impeccable hair a little bit frizzy. You almost feel bad – she did buy you dinner, after all.

There’s something almost empathetic to her demeanor, but it must be to break your resistance. Good cop, bad cop, as they say. You’re honestly surprised Rogers is the bad one this time.

He must really hate HYDRA. And so do you.

Thing was, you were kept in the dark on most of their operations. You didn’t even know where your base was until you escaped from it: two days away from civilization across the frozen tundra.

And this felt like walking back to it, except with a government issued name.

“I don’t know all these things about them like you think I do,” You start, and you meet eyes with Sam Wilson.

“We’ll take whatever you got.” He’s frowning, as if he’s undecided about you.

“And then let me go.”

“You will be pardoned. But you’ll stay at the compound for the time being.”

That’s that pretty bow on top.

However long or what would be done with you after said pardon, no one was willing to make that clear.

“That’s a shit deal. Prison or prison! Who did you guys learn to negotiate with, the Russian mob?” You squirm on your seat, but the cuffs on your wrists and ankles are tight. Your powers nowhere to be found. All that lab fuckery for nothing.

“You’ll see the living conditions are pretty good there.” Natasha arguments. “And we have a pretty damn good doctor that can figure out whatever’s going on with you.”

You look at her like a deer caught in the headlights. You’ve always thought she had no special powers, but now you’re wondering if she can read minds.

All three of them are staring at you now.

“Your nose is bleeding.” She explains it, and you hastily wipe it on your shoulder. There goes your last good hoodie. “And I read your file. We did.”

Your file. She has your file, the thing you’ve been looking for, the answers you need.

As if on cue, the pounding on your head returns. You close your eyes, letting your head fall back and knock softly against the wall. All you wanted was to just live. No stupid powers. No running. No Avengers, no HYDRA, no migraines and nosebleeds. The boring life everyone complains about.

You didn’t want to waste away while your own body turned against you, mad someone tampered with it until things went haywire.

The promise of a solution at last makes you go quiet.

“Fine. The Avenger Disneyland it is.”

#steve rogers x you #steve rogers x reader #steve rogers fic #steve rogers imagine #steve rogers #emwrites

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