#notice the quality decrease because I am tired

[metalcatholic]

Hey! I have a question regarding physiotherapy, since you have some experience in the medical field by now maybe you could help? My grandmother has arthritis. Her doctor prescribed physiotherapy; this is her second round. The 1st time she liked a lot more, this one... she already cancelled 3/6 times. She either was tired or the weather was bad. She also doesn't want to go, because she says it's boring and doesn't help. My question: does physiotherapy help in a case like this?

So I am a not a physical therapy student (aka physiotherapy). I am a occupational therapy student in the United States. Based on your use of the word physiotherapy, my advice may be different from occupational therapist who are not based in the US as their schooling and scope of practice is not identical to OTs in the US.

So disclaimer - I’m a student this is general advice, I’m not advising any treatment or action you or your grandma should take. Please consult a physician/PT/OT licensed to practice where your grandma lives.

To start off, I’m sorry your grandma has arthritis. Generally speaking therapy of either discipline is important for arthritis because it is a degenerative disease. We want the person to maintain their level of function as much as possible, while teaching them how to cope with the changes brought on by arthritis. So yes I would consider therapy to be helpful.

I don’t know your grandma’s age, where the arthritis is located, it’s progression, or the goals of her medical team (eg is joint replacement on the table).

So I would see if your grandma or an advocate of hers can communicate her frustrations to the PT. This round of PT is boring. But the first round wasn’t (I assume). What has changed? Is it a different therapist with a different approach that your grandma doesn’t personally jibe with? Asking the PT to make sure the sessions are engaging and that your grandma and the therapist are on the same page is a perfectly reasonable ask IMO.

Maintaining one physical capabilities as they age is key to prolonged independence and decreased hospitalization. I’d see if there’s community opportunities like senior exercise classes. Aquatic exercise or therapy would be *amazing* for your grandma, allows you to get a workout while reducing pressure on the joints and the pool is heated which can help with pain. But even groups like crafting, birdwatching, or just plan of chatting gets people out of the house and communicating with others. For me posture is key and I love it when my elderly clients hang out as I’ve noticed their posture improves which means they’re using all of those muscles needed for postural control (yay!).

I would also see if there’s occupations or activities that arthritis has made difficult for your grandma to complete. If the therapist is able to implement adaptive equipment, activity pacing, etc to support her participation in those occupations. IMO it’s easier to introduce modifications before they are truly needed in the medical sense just from a motor learning standpoint.

This is getting long so I’ll summarize

PT and OT are important in maintaining quality of life and independence for persons with arthritis

Your grandma and her PT should ensure their goals for therapy line up

Your grandma should see if the PT can change what they are doing to make the sessions more enjoyable

Seek out community resources for physical activity and social engagement

Maybe it’s time to introduce equipment or strategies to adapt tasks and living as whole so your grandma can age with arthritis.

Sorry if this is written poorly. There’s so much I like want to say but given I don’t know your grandma I kept adding exception after exception and it was a mess in this text box,

[struggle-but-its-all-ocean-floor]

Enhypen's Romance Untold Review:

I'll preface this by saying something I really dislike about a lot of kpop groups is how their entire musical output, styling, image, etc. seems to be meant to fulfill the fans' Y/N fantasies. And I think Enhypen's very guilty of this. Nothing about them seems natural or genuine, especially lately because Hybe has been laying it on pretty thick. I've even seen alleged fabric inclusions of their outfits on this album?? It's like Enhypen is Hybe's fanservice boy group (note: I don't know if the members themselves do fanservice, like on lives and stuff; I'm not talking about the idols in particular or accusing them of anything).

Like, the XO (Only If You Say Yes) MV was like a romantic kdrama, with BL vibes. And that ending shot of Nikki, their youngest, barely legal member, looking smolderingly at the camera? Like, why??

Anyway,

Moonstruck - A nice, okay, song?

XO (Only If You Say Yes) - Don't like the song much tbh. It's not bad, but the quality of their tts has decreased/been inconsistent. It's not even the quality of the production, but the songs are not memorable to me and this whole concept is cringe. The chorus is very repetitive.

Your Eyes Only - Am I the only one who thinks this sounds like Lizzo's Juice? The "Yayaya", the rap, the beat... It's okay, sounds like a copy of other songs.

Hundred Broken Hearts - Very 80s I guess? This album is like a rollercoaster of different musical genres. Yet all the songs end up sounding very similar and bland.

Brought the Heat Back - More "Yayaya"s? I think some of their vocal tones, like Sungwon and Jay's hurt my enjoyment of their songs. I also haven't been enjoying how Heeseung sounds in the album?

Paranormal - It's a very normal song? Tiring of the album atp.

Royalty - Forgot about it as soon as I hear it tbh.

Highway 1009 - Normal ballad.

XO (Eng. Ver.) - The tt is the most memorable song in the album. The beginning is nice, but then their singing and the chorus needed to be better (esp. the chorus...). I barely noticed I was listening to an English version because they're pretty good with English and it sounded very natural. JKVE fit in smoothly, but I'm not sure why he was needed. I almost couldn't tell he wasn't an Enhypen member. If you don't know their voices, you won't be able to tell. He only had, like, a handful of lines. Also, this song needed a bridge! EN hate bridges!

Anyway, overall the album is solid. None of the songs are bad, and you can listen to it pretty easily. The production is solid too. But nothing is particularly good, just nice or okay, and I probably won't revisit it.

[ghostofroswell]

Emotional rollercoaster yadda yadda

[tinytek]

okay so, i am very much interested in your hermit g/t flight rising au. If you wanna share something about it, i'd like so see it. <3 ps ur arts great.

yess thank you both!! this au is currently taking over my brain

(If you don't know, Flight Rising is an online dragon breeding game that you can play here. It has a lot of lore, from the cultures of different dragon breeds to the story of their world and the war they're currently waging with the beastclans (which include harpies ;P))

Okay, so the AU is very grian-mumbo-scar centric. Scar is a pearlcatcher (Shadow flight), Mumbo is a nocturne (Lightning flight), and Grian is a harpy runaway. Here are my scries + Grian's design:

(Grian art is mine ^^)

I have several sketches of Scar, Mumbo, and Grian in my notebook but I don't have high quality pictures right now ;P

Mumbo and Scar have been friends for quite a while now, and travel together. They often tag along the tail end of the Trading Post caravan, traveling from city to city, though they don't tend to interact with the other traders. Scar is a, ahem, salesdragon, NOT a conman. He sometimes sells little gadgets made by Mumbo, and Mumbo also hires himself out to repair existing machines. They're the very last in the caravan, far enough back that they probably don't count as part of it at all, but they follow the same general path.

Oh! Last night (halfway through writing this) I actually added Etho to the AU!

He's a Lightning flight mirror dragon who also regularly travels with the Post. He's an engineer like Mumbo. He wears the mask to hide his sharp teef, because mirrors have a bit of a terrifying reputation as carnivores and hunters ;P

Pearl is a harpy scout and Grian's sister. I have plans for her later, wink wink. Might make a separate post about their relationship.

The main plot revolves around Grian, Mumbo and Scar.

Grian left the roost, dressed as a female harpy, in a roughly made warrior's mask. He was bored at home, tired of being treated like he was fragile, and wanted to be part of the war against dragonkind. (The spirit of chaos and violence that is Grian will never be content to sit around looking pretty.) The first dragons he encountered were Scar and Mumbo, who were alone, and unexpectedly kind to him. They offered to let Grian stay with them, since he was alone and hungry, and he accepted with the intent to spy. He didn't know at the time that spying on a couple of hermits like them wouldn't tell him anything useful. Eventually, though, without his notice, the idea of spying slipped lower and lower on his list of priorities. He started to genuinely like the two. By the time another harpy appears... he's pretty much changed his entire mind about them without realizing until he was forced to confront it.

There’s also this lovely little thing about familiar bonding <3 which is that it’s not consensual and often takes away a lot of a familiar’s free will by making them dependent on their dragon. Familiar bonding is a combination of both passive and active magic. The first stage acts passively and is caused by proximity to a dragon, and cannot be controlled by either party. After that, a dragon being affectionate with the afflicted creature will increase the bond and decrease their free will. A fully familiarized creature is emotionally dependent on dragons and while able to be away from them, must know they can return, and will almost always choose to do so. 

Grian... is a free spirit. He doesn’t want to be familiarized. In fact, it terrifies him, not being fully in control of his emotions. He does care for Scar and Mumbo, but he hates that part of his affection for them may be caused by their bonding magic. He hates that he isn’t their equal. He hates that he can’t be too affectionate with them without damning himself to a lifetime of dependency. 

And you know what accelerates the bonding process? Warmth, physical touch, emotional closeness. You know where Grian is juuuust small enough to go, which has all of those things? yeah, we both know

a n y ways, if people are interested in this AU, i might post more of my art and ideas about it here! There are noms (obviously) as well as possible nsfw parts (havent decided on that yet) but they’re by no means required reading. The story can be understood easily without either. Both are just meant to drive home the whole “trust and bonding” thing. Def will not be posting any nsfw parts here even if i write them though lol

also send asks about the au if you want anything clarified :D this isnt everything!

[misschifuyu]

- I've been meaning to make a post on this for a few days now, but ive managed to hold it back a little longer.

As a first comment, with what I'm about to say I am in no way asking for pity; this is simply how things have been as of late, and I just want to tell you guys instead of just outright going silent for a period of time.

From a general overview, I no longer enjoy writing as much as I once did. I don't want to just leave it at that because it is far from being the only reason that may push this blog into an indefinite hiatus. But, to place down a first point, writing has become a sort of...duty, in the sense that I feel that I need to post these writings on a fairly regular schedule.

Now, I know what many of you might say - and some have even said: don't overwork yourself or feel pressured to write. Truthfully, I wish I could; I really do. But on the other side of the coin that represents recognition amongst the fandom, for me there's almost an obligation to have to continue writing, to fulfil all these wonderful requests from people I adore and care for more than anything.

It's overwhelming. Some might say "Belle, you've gotten this far, just do it", and to that I say I wish I could. However, writing out of obligation shows in what is posted, it shows that no interest is being put in and the quality considerably decreases. The last thing I want to do is botch everyone's requests just because I feel that I need to do them, whether or not they're well written.

This is simply something that has happened to me before, so it comes as no surprise for me, personally. However, despite this repetition of circumstances, I still feel horrible about myself, disappointed to the extent that I don't even feel that I should be part of this fandom after losing interest in writing for it.

Another point in this - and this may come off as harsh, but in no way is this my intention - is the rise of people in the fandom. In no way am I considering the increase of fans as something negative; in fact, this brings along new writers.

Now, the problem here is that I see all these wonderful, new, fresh writers and think "Wow...you are all doing so amazingly and receiving the recognition you deserve", which is something I wish for any writer. However, this makes me want to leave space for these new writers, to leave behind the posts I've made and let the new, amazing authors take over because it's what they truly deserve.

I mean, I'm sure many have gotten tired of seeing my writing style all the time, and for that I believe I should step down from the blog until further notice - though, the possibility stands that this return may never happen.

And, finally, my personal state. I'm grateful for being somewhat stable when it comes to my wellbeing; however, I have noticed a spike in the way I feel every time that I come on here. I feel extremely anxious - unwelcomed, even, at times - and it destroys my motivation to get back on my keyboard and write for all of you.

As materialistic as this may sound, I start to get worried over the notes I receive, how well a post does, what you guys think of it, etc. To put it simply, for everything that I post I have to try and keep myself from stressing over the amount of notifications because I've fallen into a mindset that if one of them doesn't get X amount of notes, my writing is bad.

And it's damaging, exhausting; I'm sure you guys can get a slight idea of how this just doesn't sit well on somebody. Especially since this hasn't been cause by another person, it's all because of me.

It's all because of me; I haven't been able to integrate myself in the fandom either. I see so many authors interacting with each other - the most wonderful sight one could ever witness - whilst I'm stuck on my writings, losing contact with everyone because I have to do these requests, I have to get them done. And I just wish I could communicate more with everyone; but this is all on me, at the end of the day.

It is doing anything but good to me, and there are days where I simply want to delete the blog and erase all of those anxious feelings, because it's the only way I can think of that would work. But I don't want to do that, because I want to let others enjoy what little work I've done up until now and because I care for you all so, so much.

It pains me to have to say this, but I'm going to have to take a break. No requests shall be deleted, forgotten or even ignored; they will all stay safely in my inbox until the time comes around that I feel able enough to do them justice.

With that, I leave you all with wishes that you take care of yourselves, to be the best version of yourselves each and every day and that you all mean the world to me. I'm so sorry that I'm doing this to you all.

belle ♡

[pokeheadcannons97]

Hello friend ^_^ I’m the chicken anon 🐤 I call myself because I’m too much of chicken to come off of anon 😊 Anyway lol. Can I request Lance, Raihan, Leon, and Cheren with a fem!S/O who’s like... really blunt and doesn’t hesitate to speak exactly what’s on her mind. It’s a blessing and a curse lol

I only do 3 characters at one ask, so imma do, Raihan, Leon, and Cheren, since I know their characters better, I hope that’s okay! ;w;

Raihan

When the two of you were interrupted on your date for the upteenth time, your patience had ran thin. 

Raihan was trying his best to accomadate both you, the camera personelle, and a large group of fans that had surrounded your table at a local pastry shoppe in Hammerlocke. He kept mouthing apologies towards you every few moments with a strained look on his features. 

Raihan was a sweet guy, and tried to go above and beyond for everyone. 

He just didn’t seem to know when to say no. 

Your time to shine. 

You had crossed your arms and with a look that could send Pumpkaboos running you stated sternly. “If you couldn’t see with all the large lense cameras,” you tapped the glass with your right knuckle. “We are trying to spend some time together, you know, a date?”

The cameraman immediately pointed the large, expensive camera towards you.  “Y/N! How is it to be in a relationship with the tamer of dragons, Raihan?”

A growl of fustration escaped you. “It would be absolutely perfect, if you lot would learn how to give someone some space!” You replied while pointing at Raihan. “Raihan has had four matches, plus a meet and greet afterwards. Can you not see that he is tired? The two of us just wanted to have some quality, quiet time together after such a long day.”

You placed your hands on your hips and pointed your index finger towards the group. “The interview, selfies, chatting, etc, is over.” You said with your voice ringing through out the now much quieter restaurant. “Next time, try to be more respectful of the people you love so much, it’ll do you some good!”

As the fans and reporters quickly left, albeit begrudgingly, you noticed Raihan giving a small applause towards you. 

“What would I do without you, Y/N?” he beamed and bent over the table to give you a kiss on the lips. 

Raihan really does see your bluntness as needed when he can’t be the one to say no. 

Leon

You were busying yourself by scrolling through Pokegram until you heard the curtain from the changing room come open. You glanced up towards your boyfriend and nearly let out a strangled noise.

“So?” he asked while doing his signature pose he was known for. “What do you think?”

In front of you, Leon was wearing the most ridiculous of clothing choice. It took forever for you to convince him to get rid of the shorts and long leggings combo with the tacky diamond pattern down the sides, but this, oh Arceus this was so much worse. 

The poor man did not know which kind of patterns went with which. He sported a plaid button up shirt that was red in color, with yellow polka dot patterned pants that came down to his calf. Socks of the most ridiculous neon yellow were encased in sneakers that had red and white zigzags through them. 

He noticed you staring at his shoes and he puffed out his chest and tapped them against the floor and they began to flash. “Pretty sweet am I right?”

“Oh my God, they bloody light up.” You whispered in disbelief and almost wanted to cry. 

He looked at you expectantly with a giddily expression, waiting for your reaction. “What do you think? A win?” He pulled on the shirt and laughed. “The shirt is my favorite, but you can’t not love these shoes! They light up an-”

“You look like a beacon for everything painful.” you said not letting him finish. 

“You mean beau-” 

“Terrible, go change. I’ll pick something that matches the rest of your clothes.” you said as he whined in protest. 

“I’m keeping the shoes!”

Cheren

Cheren was at work, grading papers from the pop quiz that he had given earlier that day. He went to grab another paper from the quickly decreasing stack to his side but his hand landed on a familiar, softer one. 

He blinked and looked up to meet your gaze as you were leaning over his desk with a raised eyebrow. 

“Ah, Y/N. What are you doing here? We’re supposed to meet up later at your house for dinner, no?” he asked glancing back down to the paper he was in the middle of grading, circling a couple questions and calculating the grade with a calculator close by. 

You gave a heavy sigh, your clueless boyfriend as absorbed in his work as ever. “Cheren, it’s actually an hour passed the time that you were supposed to meet me at my house.” you stated bluntly, taking in a bit of amusement as his eyes widened and he spun his head at the clock on the wall that read 19:02.

“Y/N, I’m so sorry!” he replied, fluttering the pen over the paper and writing the grade at the top. “I got so absorbed in grading and tomorrows lesson plans, I seem to have lost track of time...” he scratched his cheek embarassingly. 

Your arms found their way around his neck, pulling him in for a kiss. “You really do need to manage your time better, this isn’t the first time this has happened. And I’ve gotta say, if you don’t like my cooking all you’ve got to do is tell me.” you added and chuckled at his reaction of alarm. 

“Y/N, no no no, that’s so not what I meant to convey by being late!” he insisted and it made you laugh with a roll of your eyes. 

“I know, Cheren, don’t worry that smart noggin of yours.” you pulled away from him. “Now, how about we head home?” you said with a warmer smile. 

“Sounds perfect, love.” He replied with a tired, but happy sigh. 

[sideblogformindtrash]

Thank you @cupcakes-and-pain​ @starnight-whump​ and everyone else who sent asks <3

Sunflower Masterlist

CW: Shock collar; dehumanization; pet whup; conditioning; beating/cane; scars; mentioned gag, forced exercise, starvation, sleep deprivation, domestic labor; controlling behavior;

Abby shifted on her chair, smiling as she started to read the questions, the control of the shock collar on her hands. Sun sat with perfect posture, still, very still, hands over his knees. Good pet. Abby was skimming over the questions, the camera already filming.

“Alright… Let’s begin. Let’s do the questions first, we can record the intro later. I’ll start with an easy one” …A Pause “…For Abby and Sun, what is your favorite color? Well, for me, I’d say I love happy colors like yellow and oranges. I also really enjoy soft pinks and beiges as you guys must have noticed from my fashion choices! What about you, Sun?”

…A little pause. His… favorite color? Was he allowed an opinion on colors, even?

“I think… Green?”

“… Green is not a creative color , Sun” Abby rolled her eyes “Say your favorite color is yellow as well. Like a sunflower. And sound more enthusiastic about it”

“Alright Miss Abby. I apologize” A pause. Deep breath. He smiled“…My favorite color is yellow, too! It’s a very happy color, and, the color of my hair!”

…A few seconds, so they could make the cut.

“…Okay, perfect. Let’s see… Are the two of you introverts or extroverts?” She gave him a quick glance, she would handle this one “Well, I’ve always seem myself as more on the extroverted side. I’ve always had an easy time approaching people and making friends. Sun here, I’d say he is more of an introvert, he Is pretty shy, always nervous when I bring visitors. Right Sun?”

“Yes, Miss Abby”

“Alright, next question… How many pets I had before Sun, if I had any experience” Miss Abby smiled, softly “Well, Sun is the first pet I consider to be mine. But my family has had pets ever since I was a child, so I’d say I have plenty of experience dealing with them. I can count we’ve had about… Five pets from when I was young to when I moved out by myself and got Sun. Honestly I wasn’t planning on getting one at first, I always felt like they take a lot of time, but you know, the house just wasn’t the same without one of them running around. I guess after being so used to them, it’s hard to not have one. It’s also a lot less lonely now with Sun. I wasn’t used to living by myself at all, it was always just… A little too silent, you guys know?”

Sun struggled to keep his head up. Good pets kept their head down but… He had to look at the camera. To look good. Abby sighed. She didn’t like this answer, so she started it again. He wondered how many times they would have to record this today…

When she finally got satisfied, Sun’s face was hurting already, from holding that fake smile. At least she let him get some water.

“Alright… This one is fun! Sun, you’ll say one good and one bad thing about me, and me about you, right?” She smiled, chuckling to the camera. Pause. Lifted the little controller “…Choose what you say carefully, mutt”

“Yes… Sorry Miss Abby” He dry swallowed. Maybe asking would be better “Is… Hm, what can I say?”

Abby smiled.

“…Say I’m a bit too perfectionist. It’s true I guess” she chuckled “And that I’m very dedicated and responsible to you. That works”

…Sun nodded. Alright.

“…So if I had to say something bad about Sun… I think he is a bit of an airhead. Gets distracted all the time, don’t you, dear?” …He nodded again, whispering an agreement “…Louder. Speak louder”

She grunted. He tensed up immediately, seeing her finger flirt with the control of his collar. She repeated herself.

“Alright. And a good thing… Well there is a lot of good. Sun is a really dedicated and hard working pet now that I’ve finalized his training. It took a long time, but he is really good now”

…And he blushed. He didn’t even want to, but he did, and she liked that, smiling to the camera.

“…Why did I choose Sun to be my pet?” she smiled to the camera, Sun shivering slightly, nearly imperceptible “…Well I went to one of the stores. There were plenty of them there of course, but Sun just… caught my eye. Poor thing was so nervous, so shy. I reached my hand and he put his head on it, so eager to come home. So really, Sun picked me, not the opposite! It was just this, instant connection between us…”

…He didn’t remember that happening that way. He was curled up In the corner of his cage. He was scared to be purchased. He didn’t go out until he was dragged. It didn’t matter though. He just agreed. He knew better than to go against her.

“Next is for you Sun, dear. They asking If you like me as an owner, and how was your life before” She smiled, dangling the controller just out of sight of the camera.

“I… Of course I like having Abby. She is a fantastic owner and I couldn’t hope for better. As she said… there was an instant connection between us” …Dry swallowed, hoping it felt authentic enough. Side glance to the controller… “My life before… Wasn’t much. I was just out of training, on a store. Pets live for their owners, I didn’t have one yet, so no life!”

…Miss puts the controller down.

“Alright. But do one more take and try not to look like I have a gun pointed at your head”

“Yes, Miss Abby…” But well… she basically had, dangling the shock collar button around “Hm… Am I allowed some water?”

“Will it help you calm down?”

…He nodded, so she passed him a bottle. He took nearly half of it, before he felt his heart settle a bit, and he could repeat the last question.

“Ooooh” She chuckled “Alright. Someone is asking for training tips, and if Sun had any particular nasty habits that I had to train out of him…”

She shifted on the chair, with a smug smile, as Sun trembled to the core, his face twitching as he tried to keep that smile. He had plenty of habits she had to get rid of.

“Well, yes. He was… Far too lazy when I first got him. Some pets are like that, but I think it wasn’t healthy for Sun” She smiled “…I started to break his bad habits mostly by controlling his sleep schedule and food intake, as well as forcing him to… Exercise quite a bit. Sun is way healthier nowadays, isn’t that right Sun?”

“Yes, Miss Abby”

“Well, punishments. What can I say. I know a lot of other PetTubers are fans of whips and knives. I’m not. I feel like scars are unsightly and greatly decrease your pet’s life quality, so I seek for methods that don’t leave permanent marks. I will admit I do own a cane and use it occasionally, but I’m careful to never leave scarring wounds” She stands up, walking to Sun and grabbing his collar. He yelps. He can’t breathe “This shock collar is my favorite method of punishment and training. It’s fast, clean, quick, and you can correct any bad behavior as soon as you spot it, as opposed to leading the pet to a special area, removing their clothes and preparing the whipping tools or knives. Also, a few days of no sleep or regulated food, also serves as a good reminder of their place.”

“For pets that talk out of place, gags do wonders. Also soap, a cliché as that sounds, to get bad words out of their vocabulary If their training company didn’t already. And one very, very important aspect of training is that you make them do a task to your standards, no matter how long it takes. Can get tiring having to order than to re-do it over and over, but sometimes, they just don’t know your standards yet. You gotta show them! Never accept half-assed chores and tasks, or they’ll start to believe that is acceptable.”

She sat back on the chair, as he takes a deep breath, now even more aware of the thing around his neck.

“Now, for a major infraction, I’d say a combination of all of the above. Of course you can’t overdue any of them” She smiled sweetly “So I might extend punishments through a longer period of time and in small, healthier doses, instead of just applying one that is so bad it incapacitate Sun for a few days”

Sun can’t avoid but lower his head at this. She doesn’t like it… But tried to play it cool

“Oh, look, You don’t like remembering the times you were bad, do you?”

“Of course not, Miss. I’ve learned my lesson. I want to be a good pet for Miss Abby”

…She smiled, probably considering re-doing the take. She decides not to.

“Alright, next question is: do you get hate comments, and what are they about? Was there one video in particular that was deemed very violent and abusive?” …She rolled her eyes. Then read it again, before answering “Oh, dear. My content is usually very chill. But yes and I think I know what you are referring to. I did a collab video a few weeks ago that got some pretty bad reviews… I assume it’s because his channel is a frequent hate target. He has content that is a bit more… raw than my own. But I assure you, both Sun and Blue had a lot of fun that day, and he is a very responsible pet owner, too. We are planning on doing another collab on his channel, in the future”

…Sun felt his heartbeat go crazy. Another one? She hadn’t told him about it. Not that she had to, he was just her dog, after all.

“Aren’t you excited about it, Sun?”

“Yes. I’d love to see Blue again”

…She smiled. She knew he was terrified.

“Well, two more. Someone asked what is your biggest regret. Sun?”

…He lifted his head slightly. He… wished he could even remember it.

“…Being a lazy pet, at the beginning. All the times I disappointed Miss Abby. I’m glad she fixed me and showed me how to be good”

She clicked her tongue, satisfied.

“Last one. Why did I choose Sun’s name… Well” Big, fake smile “I love sunflowers. I love their happy colors, the way they brighten up an environment and bring up the imagery of warmth and summer. I figured a happy name, for a happy pet. Right Sun?”

“…Yes, Miss Abby”

[eyesaremosaics]

Anyone else feeling really depressed? I haven’t written anything in ages, because I’m on overwhelm, you are on overwhelm, the world is on overwhelm and there is nothing to do except stare blankly as it falls apart. That sounds really negative, but it’s just reality right now. There has been a death recently at my work, a man I admired very much died in such a horrible way. Another person I know is dying of stomach cancer, dealing with having to explain death to children. General heaviness surrounding everything, what with the pandemic rampant again. It’s just tiring. I’m so very tired of it all.

So much death in the last few years. Loved ones and influential celebrities. All the good ones are cycling off it seems. Leaving the rest of us here to suffer lol. That’s what it feels like. Exercise is the only think holding my sanity together. At least my physical health is in a better place. There’s a positive. Acting work has dried up completely in the bay though—I need to go to LA. However, my partner can’t move down there because his business and all his clients are here. So frustrating. True love—the thing I craved my whole life? Or my dreams? Why does it have to be one or the other. I know people say “you can’t have it all”, but fuck that. Why not?

My lessons with San Francisco are coming to an end, or so it feels. Nothing inspires here anymore. The homelessness, the grime on the streets, the boarded up storefronts, struggling businesses, crime rate, decrease in quality of virtually everything, restaurants cutting corners, the prices… I’ve done everything this city has to offer ten times over. I’ve seen it all. There is no more to see. Living in the bay is a beautiful privilege, but it comes at a high price. I just don’t know if I can justify it anymore. I need a change.

I started my new job working as event coordinator for the speakeasy, so that’s also a plus, it’s been exciting learning a new line of work. I’m in a managerial position now—which I think I deserve for all my years of loyalty to this company. I just miss the magic. This place has so many wonderful memories over the years. It’s different somehow though. I wonder if I can get to a place where I can do this job remotely. That would be ideal. What I really want to do is travel more. I want to travel to world and document all my adventures in photographs and writing. So one day I can read through old journals and see through old photos, that I really LIVED. Plus if I could do it remote, then I could travel more to audition down south.

Honestly I have lived a colorful and exciting life so far, and for that I am extremely grateful. I have been awarded many privileges that other people don’t have. I don’t know… it just feels to me that the stars are aligned in a bad sign right now. And if the last few months are any indication, I foresee many challenging times ahead.

At least I know I’m not alone in it. Just that everything feels so stressful. I notice mental illness running unchecked everywhere in public. I feel nervous going for walks in places I always used to feel safe. I see some unstable people staggering out in the streets. Maybe it’s PTSD, maybe it’s common sense. I noticed on next door that the crime rate has gone up significantly. SF is getting pretty dicey, even in nice areas. I just hate the general air of hostility that seems to loom everywhere these days. Anyone else notice this?

The redundancy and everyone else’s hyper awareness of the state of things prevents me from voicing these things. It is very discouraging. All my friends have fallen off, people have changed during the pandemic. Maybe I’ve changed too. I dunno. All I know is my lust for life has gone out the last few weeks. I’ve been fighting a pretty serious depression for a while now. Just haven’t noticed.

Trying to stay positive by prioritizing self care. Eating healthy, exercise, meditation. Even with all those things the depression keeps seeping into my consciousness like an oil spill. I just want this period of our history to be over already. My nervous system is shot.

Trying to stay creative and inspired, but it’s challenging. Perhaps I should delve more deeply into my spirituality. The only thing that made any sense the last few weeks was the tarot readings I was doing for others. A few people contacted me after virtual tarot sessions at the speakeasy. Private readings, an hour long each. I gave a lot of good information, got rave reviews from clients—so that felt good. Spiritual guidance fortifies my soul. That’s what this blog is founded on. Trying to find faith in anything is difficult these days, but that makes it all the more necessary.

[vtforpedro]

LONG POST, medical update. ptsd, suicide TW: I’m really tired. I feel like I’ve been saying that for a year but I am exhausted. mind, body and soul exhausted my head got better after I lost the water weight my chemo pill was packing on (I was 15lbs lighter than the three weeks previously. so it was pretty bad lol) but now it’s getting bad again. it never gets to the point of relief, but it gets manageable and now it’s becoming unmanageable again. it’s not water weight but it might be cause I’ve put on a couple pounds over the holidays (just barely a couple pounds, I’m eating much lighter in general) anyway I don’t see the point of being scared to name what it is my neurosurgeon and I believe this is anymore. my psychiatrist thinks it makes sense, my pcp, even the ER doctor I saw on dec. 2nd lol but I am 99.9% sure this is what I have and it does makes sense but every fucking time I think about it for a while it makes me so angry. so so so angry y’all. I wish I could sit every single medical professional I interacted with over the last year or so who didn’t believe me and tell them it’s all been real, they failed me to such a degree I have ptsd and anger problems that I’m going to need therapy for, and tell them to learn how to be better providers. blegh so I saw my neurosurgeon (one of the best in the country) for the first time in april. his thoughts? anxiety with muscle tension in my back and neck that led to tension in my head. as in the muscles around my bones, not inside of my skull. didn’t listen to me or believe me, thought all my crazy symptoms were just anxiety and possibly the chiari malformation but there’s no treatment for that beyond surgery and mine is so mild no one wants to go that route (me most of all lmao) I put off seeing him again because I saw different neurologists and my PCP over the months who basically all said the same thing. like my PCP believed me and gave me referrals to the neuros, but one told me to ‘stop worrying about this and just enjoy life’ and the other sat with me for an hour, the first half of which she was all on board the ‘anxiety is fucking with you, none of this is real’ train until I had to tell her to LISTEN TO MY SYMPTOMS firmly enough that she did. she went the opposite way then and said yeah ok something ‘mechanical’ is happening, you need to go back to a neurosurgeon. turned out she loves the neurosurgeon I saw in april (worship the ground he walks on, were her words) but told me maybe I still needed a second opinion. she did also mention that I’ve been living with this for so long that I’m ‘married to it now’ which still implies I’m making it worse than it actually is but :) whatever, she couldn’t think of what it could be decided to just go back to that neurosurgeon and tell him the physical therapy he prescribed in april I had to stop because it made things worse. his PA tried to prescribe me more PT on the phone before I firmly told her I needed to SPEAK with him face to face because my quality of life is gone, because I get close to killing myself weekly because of how bad this is and nothing has improved since april. only gotten worse. so I had my appt with him in late October I think? I explained all of my symptoms (again) and told him how nothing has changed, things have gotten worse, when I do x y z I have an episode, etc etc. he said he still doesn’t think it’s the chiari but he said it *might* be IIH idiopathic intracranial hypertension first time I’ve ever heard of it and even though it was over 11 months into this, it might just save my life now that I have idiopathic = we don’t fucking know why this happens, intracranial = HAPPENING IN MY SKULL AND BRAIN, hypertension = technically high blood pressure, but for here just high pressure cause my BP is good it is rare, it is unknown why people get it and why others don’t, it is most common in women of child bearing age who are obese. the thought is that the weight on the body causes the brain to very slightly inflate, decreasing spinal fluid flow and increasing pressure in the brain, sometimes CAUSING a chiari malformation to appear, which can cause other symptoms on top of IIH it used to be called pseudotumor cerebri because IIH makes the brain behave like it has a tumor while no tumor is actually present (which means normal MRI/CT scans and the main reason everyone told me I was faking it) I gained 80lbs in less than two years due to severe depression and ptsd. I’ve been at the same weight for almost two years now and was at that weight in Feb 2019 before things started happening in Dec 2019. sometimes it does just come on one day. it can be chronic, it can randomly go into remission and come back, and they have no idea why it even happens. it’s rare enough that no neurologist I saw could even think of it. rare enough that one of the best neurosurgeons in the country didn’t think of it until he decided he believed me lol he leans even more heavily into this because I gained weight so quickly (one of the hallmarks of getting IIH) and I had not a single symptom like it before the weight gain I don’t trust anything or anyone right now and I am extremely pessimistic and have no hope. but the one thing that’s given me a little hope, that’s made me believe this is what I have, is the fucking wikipedia page on IIH. it lists one specific symptom that I’ve seen nowhere else (and is EXTREMELY specific lmao) that I have and that everyone thought I was crazy explaining. beyond destroying your quality of life, the one thing IIH can do is cause permanent blindness. I’ve had a fuck ton of problems with my vision since this all started happening. one of the worst is that if I’m in the middle of an episode and I look up or to the left, it makes it h u r t and makes the episode worse. which is on the wikipedia page! which explains why I couldn’t fucking do EMDR therapy which involves rapid eye movement from side to side :) :) :) even my therapist was thinking this was all in my head and I was just letting my anxiety tell me EMDR would send my head into an episode instead of it actually happening lmaaaao god I am so angry y’all my mom and my uncle The Doctor wanted to commit me in March/April. I had an entire ER nurses station mock me for ten minutes for coming in repeatedly and having bizarre symptoms that, because they were unexplained, they thought I was faking. they belittled me when talking to me. one put the tv remote (no tv in the room) instead of the call button in my hand when I was too out of it to notice. the ER doctor that day told me I was making up a story, none of this was real, and to continue seeing my psychiatrist. I went home that day, told my mom I was fine for her to go back to work (she was angry with me and wanted me to go to a psychiatric hospital), took a shower and planned on swallowing a bottle of pills. I was in agony, utter agony, every single day multiple times a day I thought I was going to die, and it was being made clear to me that no one, not even my mom, believed me. I told my best friend and she talked me out of it, but I came very close and I will forever be heartbroken and angry beyond belief about this (my mom came around not long after this after seeing that this wasn’t going away and has thoroughly apologized for wanting to commit me. she has been helping me every single day since this started even tho she thought it was anxiety. I’m angry but I don’t hold it against her, not after the incredible sacrifices she’s made for me for a year) so yeah. every bizarre symptom, every agonizing thing I go through, the weird discomfort, pain and burning, vision problems, etc etc, all explained by IIH. the very specific ‘looking in a certain direction makes it worse’ has been there since day one. it’s because pressure has increased on the nerve behind my eyes so looking in a certain way aggravates the affected nerve further gaining all that water weight and having my head get so so so severe, enough to send me to the ER again, made me also think this was a real possibility and the ER doc agreed that the fluid retention was making pressure in my brain even more severe and it did ease quite a lot once that was all gone, another reason I believe this is IIH if you read up on IIH or read stories by people with it, it is life altering, debilitating, and agonizing to live with. most people will also have the same story of doctors not believing them and saying it was anxiety before getting this diagnosis the good thing? there’s a cure and while some people may need additional help later on, it works for most people. and it is, very simply, losing weight. 10-20% of body weight (some places say relief can start at just 3%) seems to completely cure it for most people because the brain is no longer inflated and because of that, any chiari malformation (cerebral tonsils sitting in the spinal cord opening) will actually go away, because it makes room in the skull for the tonsils to go back to their normal place I have some trouble knowing that I am partially at fault for gaining weight like I did, but my mom keeps telling me it’s so rare and how could I have possibly known and it was after severe trauma so. trying to deal with that too lol but yeah! weight loss journey. my chemo pill, if you read my last update, completely fucked me up for a while (including the fuckin weight gain despite a low calorie, low fat diet since like nov 1st) so it’s made it hard to lose weight. but now that I’m off of that pill, I’m down 7lbs and I will continue to lose. I have never been more motivated in my life to lose weight lmao and I’ve successfully done it before! I can’t exercise but my neurosurgeon said as the weight comes off and my symptoms start getting better, I will probably be able to incorporate more movement in my life. I can’t even walk around my apt for too long right now cause it builds pressure in my brain. it fucking sucks because this is something they don’t understand, it’s really only diagnosed if everything else has been ruled out (and with a lumbar puncture, but I am too fucking traumatized to have that done. but if I showed high pressure with no reason for it, it would be an ‘official’ IIH diagnosis). but I’m choosing not to do the LP because if I start to have my symptoms relieved as I lose weight, it’s pretty obvious that’s what this has been from the start my brain thinks it has a brain tumor and is going absolutely batshit insane and no matter how much I tried to get people to believe me, it took 11 months to get there. I will carry this with me for the rest of my life and once covid eases, I’m finding a good trauma therapist and working through this if my symptoms DON’T ease, we’ll talk brain surgery. but I think this is what I have and I think I’ll be okay when I lose enough weight (and I’ll feel better all around lol) anyway I’ve had an extremely bad couple of months and I wanted to get this off my chest, sorry it’s so long. if you can please, please, please cross your fingers for me and wish me luck that this is what it is and that over the next handful of months I lose the weight and get my life back, I will appreciate it more than I can say I’m going to thank all of you ahead of time because I lack spoons to reply right now and I also want to thank you all for your support over this last year and never doubting me. for always offering me words of encouragement and for being angry on my behalf. thank you thank you thank you I love you all <3

[sadpotatoondrugs]

Cold Nights (LadyNoir)

STATUS: REWRITTEN.

WARNINGS: None 

PAIRING

: Ladybug x Chat Noir - Ladynoir

Masterlist

~~~~~

Snow. Why did it have to be snow?

The newest akuma they were fighting, Ice Glacior, decided for some reason to cover the whole Paris in ice and snow. He was very similar to one of their previous ice-related akumas, Frozer, hence the name Ice Glacior But their motives were pretty different. While Frozer became an akuma because of the Ice Rink shutting down, Ice Glacior was an ice sculptor. He had been wronged by a friend of his and his studio where he made sculptors had been shut down by the mayor. One thing led to another and in an instant, he became a victim of Hawkmoth’s power.

He immediately used his powers to turn the whole Paris into a sculpture of ice. Unlike Frozer, though, not only did the ice spread through buildings and water, but through people as well. Soon, the entire city became an icy ghost town. People were frozen in their spots everywhere, changed into ice sculptures.

It was only by luck that Adrien and Marinette escaped the Ice Glacior’s powers. They were both in class at that time and were able to avoid the ice thanks to their blogger friend. It wasn’t a secret that the girl followed every social media possible to be one of the first ones to know if there is an akuma somewhere in the city, so it was no surprise when she stood up in the middle of their literature class to announce the new villain. Not a minute later, they all could feel the temperature in the room drastically decrease. By then, Marinette and Adrien were already halfway through their transformations.

Thankfully, the powers of their own miraculouses were able to withstand the power of the akuma and did not get covered in ice. That being said; even through the cold resistance their suits provided, they felt a slight chill. But that was nothing they couldn’t ignore. They needed to focus on the fight.

As Marinette, now disguised as Ladybug, left the girl’s bathroom, she couldn’t help but wince at the scene in front of her. Everybody was covered in ice, not moving, not breathing. Of course, it wasn’t like she didn’t expect that to happen, but it hurt nonetheless to see her friends basically, well, dead.

But that was the burden that came with being Ladybug. The fate of her friends and the fate of the other people in Paris was always up to her ability to bring everything back to normal. There was always that pressure in the back of her mind when she fought, the pressure that she has to fix everything.

It sucked, but hey. That responsibility had to fall on somebody. Somebody had to protect others and be there as the symbol of peace. And that somebody just ended up being her.

It wasn’t like she complained, no, not at all. She loved being Ladybug and was glad that fate gave her that miraculous, gave her Tikki. But the pressure was something she wished she didn’t have to endure.

Taking a deep breath, she shook her head and swung away from the scene and into the cold streets of Paris. It was not the time to think like that, she had to safe everybody.

She met her partner not long after leaving the school. They both discussed the villain, questions whether the akuma was Phillipe again were thrown in the air. They looked for the akumatized villain everywhere, it was quite difficult to do so since they had no idea of his whereabouts. They checked every ice-related building in Paris, but they were unsuccessful.

In the end, it was Ice Glacior who seeked them out. He, or rather, Hawkmoth didn’t want to wait any longer for their miraculouses and chose to fight. They did the usual, battling the villain while trying to figure out the akuma’s residence and the person’s motives.

Throughout their many fights, they figured out that it is easier to fight and defeat the akuma when the victim is in doubt of his decisions. That is why the majority of their battle consisted of blocking the attacks and reasoning with the Ice Glacior. They were somehow successful in making the villain doubt his decisions, but to their dissapointment, this villain did not choose to fight them with an occupied mind like the others and fled.

The two heroes tried to follow the villain, but it was like he had done some kind of a magic trick. As soon as they turned one corner, he was gone. Nowhere in sight. The two searched the Paris for him, splitting ways as to cover more ground. Neither of them wanted the fight to continue anymore, it had been quite a few hours since their transformation and fight and they were getting more and more exhausted as the day proceeded. They wanted to end it as soon as possible and get back home, rest and (in one of the hero’s cases) spend time with their beloved families.

When the sun began to sit, their hopes were getting thin, as was their energy for the day. Even with the Miraculouses magical properties enhancing their stamina and strength, their bodies energy levels remained the same. They decided to meet back up somewhere safe and figure out what to do next.

One thing was clear, they couldn’t fight if they were exhausted. They needed to rest. They both agreed on sleeping through the night to restore their energy and then resume their search for the villain. They needed to find a safe place where he wouldn’t find them first, though.

By the time they found a place, the sun was already gone and the Moon was in it’s place. They settled in a small family house. It was in a part of the town where neither of them had been before, even as heroes. It also happened to be a place that was halfway out of the range of Ice Glacior’s powers. The house was frozen halfway, and there was no way they would be able to get inside through doors or windows, as they were all frozen. But thankfully, the house had an attic with an accessible entrance from the outside. They were glad that the attic was practically left untouched, spare for the few spots of ice on the ground, which meant that they wouldn’t have to sleep on the ice and risk getting hypothermia.

Then again, that was another worry in their minds. The suits barely blocked out the cold before, when it was day and the sun was up. Now, the coldness of the night was mixed with the powers of the Glacior, making the cold even more unbearable. Even with the suits, they could definitely say they were cold now.

They were only glad that the attic blocked out some of the coldness and provided temporarily a shelter for them.

They searched the attic first for any blankets or pillows, possibly some clothes to cover themselves when they slept. The attic was mostly filled with old pictures and toys, some furniture here and there. At last, they found a few think blankets. They only hoped that would be enough to cover their cold bodies and warm them up even just a little in their sleep.

They used one of the blankets to cover the window they entered through and Ladybug used some of the furniture as a temporary trap. If the Glacior found them while they slept and tried to enter, he would make so much noise that he would alert the two of his presence and give them time to transform.

Now, both heroes had one thin blanket and no pillow. They were grateful for at least the blankets, though. It provided at least some comfort from the cold.

“Okay. Remember, no matter what happens, you don’t look in my corner, and I don’t look in yours.” Ladybug sterly reminded her partner as they prepared for their detransformation. Even though neither one of them used their superpowers, the kwamis must be getting exhausted, too, from aiding the heroes through other abilities.

“Don’t worry, I’m not going to take even a single peek. Even though it will be very hard to resist looking at your beauty, My Lady.” It seemed that the exhaustion was getting to him, it could easily be determined through the quality of his jokes. Ladybug rolled her eyes at him to which he put his hands up in surrender, noticing her seriousness. “Hey, I’m sorry. I promise I won’t look. Cat’s honor.”

Ladybug smiled gratefully and nodded. They both turned around and detransformed.

They immediately felt the temperature drastically change as soon as the suits disappeared from their bodies. They both gasped slightly when the cold air hit their skin. But the had expected that much. They both fed their kwamis and lied down, covering their bodies with their blankets as quick as possible to warm themselves up.

They didn’t transform right away, as to not tire the kwamis further. They couldn’t get more food for them since everything was turned to ice, so they chose to preserve the powers until the next day, when they would be able to search for the villain and take him down.

Marinette tossed and turned, the cold, hard floor along with the cold air didn’t seem to want her to rest. She expected it, yes. But that didn’t mean she was prepared for it.

Her whole body was shaking and she had to try to remain silent as to not wake up Chat with her heavy breathing and such. That’s right, he was able to fall asleep quite easily. Fast, too. She was kind of jealous of that, but ignored that fact and tried to fall asleep herself. That proved to be quite difficult. She could barely feel the fingers on her hands and feet, as they were getting numb from the cold. She breathed into her hands and stuffed them under her armpits to get them a little warmer.

She heard shuffling and prayed that she didn’t wake up her partner. Fate wasn’t playing in her favor this time, though.

“My Lady? Is everything okay..?”

Damn it.

“Huh?... Yeah… Why…. Why wouldn’t it be?” She internally cursed at her failed attempt to hide her shaking. She could only hope he would reason the stuttering with her being sleepy.

“You don’t sound like it… I can hear your excessive breathing, you know.”

How come he isn’t… cold?

…

Wait, HOW COME HE HEARS MY BREATHING WHAT THE-

“Okay, fine. I am… just a little cold…. Happy? ” She brought the blanket closer to herself, wrapping it even tighter around her small body in an attempt to create at least a little bit more heat. “But it’s not like… like I can do much about it.”

She heard shuffling, which startled her a little bit. It sounded like her partner had got up and begun walking somewhere. She wouldn’t say anything at that, if she didn’t catch the sound of his footsteps getting closer to her.

“Chat?.. Chat! What are you doing! I told you not to look!” Unwrapping her blanket from her body, she brought it up to cover her face as to not be recognized. While doing so, she sadly released all the heat that was built up inside the cocoon she created earlier. She mentally cried rivers but chose to ignore it since there was a bigger problem at hand at the moment. Before she could scold him again, he chose to reason with her.

“Relax, Bugaboo. My eyes are closed, I can’t see a thing…” As he finished his sentence, Marinette calmed down from her panic from before and relaxed. Although she trusted her partner with her life, she knew how he longed for the time where they would finally reveal their identities to each other. But she knew that that day was far away from becoming reality, not as long as Hawkmoth was out there.

She didn’t make a move to remove her blanket from her face, even though it meant that her feet were now completely uncovered and she could feel the coldness again. Even though he said his eyes were closed, she felt afraid of uncovering her face.

She heard his footsteps stop right next to her and she quickly came back to her senses and asked him again

“…What are you-?” She suddenly felt something, no, somebody hug her from behind. She tensed up again as Chat snuggled up to her from behind and dropped his own blanket over the both of them.  

“Don’t worry, My lady. I’m only trying to prevent you getting hypothermia.” He said gently, and Marinette could sense how genuine he sounded while saying it. And she believed him. Partially, she was freaking out on the inside, her mind screaming at her to tell him to bug off and go back to his corner. That this was way too much of a risk to take. But on the other hand… The warmth that radiated off of his body and mixed with hers was… comforting. She didn’t know if it was because of the addition of the second blanket being tossed over her body, or if it was actually thanks to Chat’s own body heat that she no longer felt cold.

Either way, she was grateful for the gesture.

“..:Thank you, Chat.” She mumbled, subconsciously leaning back into him for more warmth. “You really are the best partner that Ladybug could ever have.” And just like him, her words were nothing less than genuine.

“Always, My Lady.”

Maybe she’d risk accidentally revealing their identities, just for tonight.

[purplepints]

I am so fucking tired of hearing the "well only 1% of ppl die from getting covid" bs

You know how many kids died from polio? About 3% on average. Adults faired worse, but even then about 70% of polio cases were asymptomatic. The remaining 30% ranged from mild to death, with mild taking up the lion's share.

At our peak year, the US had about 52,000 reported cases of polio (which means that the actual number of people who had it but were asymptomatic was almost about 200,000).

Out of those 50k+ symptom diagnoses cases, only 3k died. The other 47k recovered.

Yet even those numbers were sufficient to create the March of Dimes and a public pressure to find cures, vaccinations, etc.

Within 15 years, doctors started to notice that adult survivors were developing similar symptoms and these patients were the first to show what are now called "post-polio syndrome" patients.

But even before that, the 20-25% of cases with symptoms but who recovered often had mobility issues, bent legs or arms, 'frozen' joints, etc because of how poliomyelitis attacks nerves.

With Covid, if you say "well 99% of ppl survive" a) you're wrong, it's more like 93-95% and b) you're saying '99% are fine' ie survival means complete recovery.

Nope.

It's like saying that 99% of people survive amputation of multiple fingers.

Well sure, they survive, if it's a binary alive/dead count.

They didn't die from it, so they survived.

But how does having 6 fingers change your life from having 10? How does losing a thumb change your ability to do things in every day life? How much extra wear or stress will your remaining fingers, hand, etc take on due to you having to switch to a non-dominant hand as primary use or accelerate repetitive motion conditions like carpal tunnel?

How long would it take you to adapt to having fewer fingers, adapt to a prostethic, gain confidence in the reuse of your hand(s)? How much more would you have to pay every year for medical stuff and how much on non-covered items that you'd have to replace or just start buying for convenience?

Scissors? Can openers? Button hooks?

What if your job was typing, like a court stenographer? Or a music teacher? Would you be able to adapt?

Alive doesn't mean unchanged or unharmed.

Surviving doesn't mean returning to the status quo.

People aren't just dying from Covid or surviving it, everyone. A large portion of people who have recovered from covid have serious damage to their heart, lungs, brain and other organs that may never fully heal, complications that change their lives forever—just like lots of people who survived Smallpox or polio or rubella were never back to the way they were prior to catching those diseases. Going through it doesn't end with you being 100% fine if you survive.

It's more like :

Out of 100, 95 ppl survive initial infection

- of those 95, X (let's say 35) end up with a long-term issue

- of those 35, 25 have more than one longterm issue (lasting over 6 months, requiring medical checks or adaptation of work/life) that may be treatable or improve over time without much intervention

- the remaining 10 have conditions that are chronic and less likely to improve over time and in turn could make the patient more likely to die from other illness, decrease their overall quality of life and decrease their lifespan overall.

So suddenly it isn't a 5/95 issue, it's a 35/95 issue and a 10/35 issue, so your odds of surviving haven't changed but your odds of surviving unharmed and exactly as you were before are greatly decreased.

Now it's more of a 1/3, where you swap from 5% dying to 30~% having long-lasting illness, symptoms or developing conditions that continue for anywhere from 6mo post-infection to end of life 20, 30 or 40 years from now.

If I cut off, say, your right thumb and left forefinger, you're 99% likely to live afterward, but you're certainly going to have a ton of fucking issues with doorknobs, buttons, typing, getting dressed, etc which will require months or years of you adapting along with costing you a shit ton of money in costs for medical, assitive devices, potential career change and all the time involved in learning how to use your hands/body. But hey you're part of the 99% who survived so why are you mad?

So to review -

5 die.

35 survive with potential life-long issues.

60 survive with little to no symptoms or complications (but also no long-term immunity so could be reinfected and/or still subject to secondary development of issues related to their exposure in the future)

Sounds more like a 40/60 split than a 5/95 now, right?

That's because IT ALWAYS IS

3k deaths out of 50k from polio doesn't give you the # who were permanently paralyzed in a limb, two limbs, left unable to walk, etc. or that up to 50% of polio survivors developed a condition from their original exposure decades later (and that no one even knew existed at the peak of polio infections in the US) even if they survived without permanent paralysis of any part of their body.

We're on track to see 400k+ deaths by the end of the year in the US alone and that doesn't include the people with chronic or permanent issues who survived.

It isn't binary.

It isn't something to dismiss because of the percentage of fatality is 'low'.

It also isn't only your life that is being endangered.

Don't travel for the holidays.

Don't gather with people outside your household.

Don't go all over shopping for gifts.

Don't hold your tongue around people you care about: tell them to stay home, tell them to not gather, tell them to be patient and think of others.

It isn't just covid. It's all the cancer patients having to delay treatments that compromise their immune systems. It's all the patients needing organ transplants who cannot get surgeries. It's the backups of CT/MRI for emergency patients bc of protocol to avoid contagion. It's about all the people who need care only hospitals can provide being rescheduled or shuffled down the weeks. It's about full hospitals, people forced to find ways to get basic needs met in areas that don't have many options for at-risk people, and a domino effect of selfish behavior directly leading to the injury and death of thousands who could be alive today if people just did the bare fucking minimum and masked up, distanced and stayed home.

Stay the fuck home.

[afictionaladventure16]

Hey girl! I just wanted to take the opportunity to thank you for your writing! I often struggle with mental abuse and your fanfiction really helps me with that, especially your fatherfigure fics. So thank you for that! ❤ I saw that you're about to close your requests for a while, so i thought i would build the guts to ask you for a Tom Hiddleston x Teen!reader (female) where the girl has a dad, but is looking for someone to actually step up and act like one? Thanks again! -⚡

Are You Proud of Who I Am? (Tom Hiddleston x Teen!Fem!Reader) 

A/N: I got a similar request by @murielthemagicalgirl​ so I decided to blend them together. To the Anon: I hope you’re doing okay and if you ever need anything don’t hesitate to message me! Stay strong, beautiful. I really hope you both enjoy the fic!

Song Title: Hurt by Christina Aguilera 

Actors Masterlist

Warnings: Mentions of an absent father 

Word Count: 1,421

You were eating breakfast with your dad before you had to go on set. The silence was deafening, he wanted to spend time with you but with all the trauma he’s caused it felt like the “quality time” was just reminding you of all the times he’d come home drunk. Yeah, he’s changed but the only time he will make an effort in building a relationship with you was whenever he needed something from you.

You heard him chuckle, you glanced over at him noticing he was on his phone, “What?” you asked. 

“Nothing,” he said softly as he placed his phone down and continued to eat, “just my friend sent me a picture of his daughter at her graduation,” he began to say, “she graduated at the top of her class in college, can you believe that? That girl is going places, I’ll tell you that.” You remained quiet as he continued to talk about this friend and his daughter. You’ve never heard of this friend before but then again, it felt like you didn’t even know your father at all. 

Your heart panged at the mention of how proud his friend must be and how it must be a great feeling. You wondered if that meant that he wasn’t proud of your achievements. Was he even proud of you at all? Even the slightest bit? “Y/N!” You quickly snapped out of your thoughts, you flinched at his loud voice, “isn’t it time for you to go on set?” 

“Oh, yeah,” you said quietly before getting up from your chair, placing your dirty dish in the sink, “see you later,” you then walked out of the trailer. Your mind kept circling around the idea that your dad wasn’t proud of you, that he probably never was. That those slurred words he’d implanted in your mind when he was so dependent on the alcohol as a relief, were true. All of it. The hurtful words that drove you insane in the middle of the nights, it was all true. He thought of you as a failure, a no good for nothing failure and you knew then that no matter how hard he tried to fix the damage he’s caused it would all be useless. Throughout the day you stayed quiet, you noticed a couple of times that you hadn’t spoken much and you would join conversations in order to mask the pain but deep inside all you wanted to do was crawl into your bed and let out a good cry. 

Tom Hiddleston was standing beside you as you both listened to the director talk about the scene you had just done and how he wanted to re-do one part just in case. Usually, you’d be trying to make Tom laugh or making some sort of joke that’ll make the director laugh but Tom noticed that you just stayed quiet. He tried not to think much of it but he couldn’t help but wonder if everything was alright. 

You redid the scene like the director asked, “and cut!” he yelled out, “that was perfect!” he praised but you felt no emotion towards it. Usually, you’d beam and thank him but this time you just smiled and walked away. You didn’t think anyone noticed but Tom noticed, he noticed and he started to worry. He began to follow you out of the set area and towards the trailers, “Y/N,” he called out. 

You stopped and turned around, “everything alright?” he asked as he placed his hand on your arm. 

You nod, “yeah, of course,” you mumbled. 

He tried to look you in the eyes but you avoided it at all cost, “look me in the eyes and say that,” he said softly. You let out a shaky sigh, knowing very well that you couldn’t. Knowing very well that if you did you’d end up in tears, “Y/N,” he said gently, “you know you can trust me,” he began to say, “so, I’m going to repeat myself and I want you to tell me the truth… is everything alright?” 

It felt like that wall you were trying to hold up with all the strength you had just collapsed, you let out a sob as tear began to flow down your cheek, Tom quickly wrapped you in his arms, “it’s okay, it’s okay,” he softly said as he rubbed your back, he noticed people beginning to look towards your guys’ direction. “Let’s go inside my trailer,” he said as he led you towards his trailer. 

Once inside, Tom sat you on the couch, “now, tell me, what’s been troubling that mind of yours?” 

You broke down once again, Tom rubbed your back in order to calm you, “he hates me,” you blurted out, “I just know it.” 

“What are you talking about, Darling? Who hates you?” 

“M-my dad,” you said through the sob, “he was talking about his friend,” you hiccuped, “a-and how proud he must be of his d-daughter and he acted like he’s never felt that way,” you sobbed as the words left your mouth. 

You began to hyperventilate, “Y/N, I need you to breathe with me,” he said as he began to take a deep breath in, you copied, “And out,” he said as he slowly exhaled. Tom felt such sympathy for you, he hated seeing you so heartbroken over a man who was supposed to do the exact opposite of breaking your heart. Tom personally didn’t know your father but he knew of him. He knew about his drinking problems and he was there for you through it all, as a matter of fact, there had been times where Tom just wanted to take you away from that home. He wanted to be your legal guardian because he feared for your safety when you were home. 

You continued to spill your guts to Tom, how to hurt you felt because the man who swore he would change, was still the same man deep inside. “It’s as if no matter what he tries, it’s like his gestures to build this relationship are monotoned,” you said as your sobbing decreased, you were convinced that you had run out of tears. “He’s done so much damage that he can’t fix it,” you whispered. 

Tom sighed as he pulled you in for a hug, “I’m so sorry you have to go through this, Darling.”  

“I just want a father that will hold me and tell me that he’s proud of me, someone that will boast to their own friends how proud they are of me.” You let out a deep breathe, as you wiped away your tears, “I’m tired of going home scared that he’ll be drinking again, I’m so tired of it, Tom.” Tom stayed silent, he listened to speak your fears and wants, wishing he could do something to help you. 

“I’m proud of you,” he said softly, “I’m so proud of you, especially with everything you’ve been through and how you’ve managed to still work under such conditions.” He smiled with pride, “There are times where I tell my friends about this young girl I work with and although she’s seen a rough life so far she still manages to smile and tell her fans that everything will be okay, that they can get through it, even when sometimes she doesn’t believe it herself. I tell them how proud I am of this girl for being so strong and talented.” You wrapped your arms around Tom tighter as he boasted about you. You had thought of him as a father figure but you just didn’t think he would have appreciated it but now with all the things he was saying you knew that he thought of you as his daughter at times. 

Tom placed his hand under your chin so you can look at him, “I may not be your father by blood but I am willing to be the father you so desperately want in life. I think of you like a daughter, Y/N and I am thankful every day that you are a part of my life.” 

You smiled, “thank you, Tom,” you said softly, “I’ve always thought of you as a dad I just… I just thought you would’ve felt-” 

“No, no, not at all darling,” he said softly as he pulled you back in an embrace. “If anything, I’m honored.” You were grateful for Tom. Grateful that he was willing to step up to play the part that your own biological father couldn’t. 

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TAGLISTS

[versary]

march be like

this is kind of hard to see because it’s a screen cap of my phone. but. the top graph is my heart rate variability from october to march, the bottom is my resting heart rate from october to march. you’ll see that both my HRV and my RHR improved after october (HELL MONTH: hundreds of assignments due that month, very little sleep) as my a) sleep improved both in quantity and quality, b) my stress levels went from through the roof to non-existent, c) i could spend time really working on recovering between training sessions. my HRV was, on average, highest in february, and my RHR was, on average, lowest in january (but still pretty low in feb). you can see that march has a pretty big decrease in ave. HRV (from 129 ms to 97 ms) and my ave. RHR has jumped from 50 bpm to 54 bpm. 

i have noticed the past few weeks that i am tired all the time, in particular these first two weeks of shut down/quarantine. i have been sleeping a lot but not well; i.e. i’m spending more time in bed but my heart rate is not dropping enough while i’m sleeping to get the most out of my sleep so i’m recovered the next day. 

i can attribute it to two things: uni started at the end of feb, and covid-19 has Occured. both of those things have increased my baseline levels of stress (not anxiety), and i know that stress can really affect me physically (poor sleep quality, forgetting to eat, eczema sometimes). this is the only thing i can think of that could change my readings so much, and it was interesting to see that they’re on par with october’s readings (HELL MONTH). 

it’s not a bad thing. it’s just a thing. but i thought it was interesting to see how much stress can actually affect me, and even when i get 8+ hours of sleep a night for two weeks, if the sleep quality is low it won’t help me recover as much as i might expect. i’ve been exhausted for ages despite sleeping a lot, and this is why. 

[tinkeringwithcannabis]

Tinkering with Cannabis: The First 90 Minutes Episode 51

Strain: Wedding Cake

Company: Sira Naturals

Locations: Somerville, Ma

Cannabis Connoisseur: Molly

Website: www.siranaturals.org

​Hello again to all my cannabis loving and canna-curious friends, and welcome back for another episode of The First 90 Minutes! Today we will be toking and talking about a strain that I consider to be one of the white whales of cannabis, Wedding Cake. This strain is very hard to find, and I have been in search of it for quite a while. Finally, while surfing Leafly one day, Sira Naturals in Sommerville, Ma had this pretty lady in stock, limiting patients to 1/8th per day, so I headed on over to see my friend Molly and pick up my product. So what makes this strain so special? Well, I have been in search of it because I am a huge fan of GSC (Girl Scout Cookie), which is a parent of Wedding Cake (the other parent being Cherry Pie), and I have tried the Wedding Cake CBD and it was amazing, so I have been in search of the THC strain ever since. The top three terpenes that make up this strain are limonene, caryophyllene, and myrcene. Limonene helps with anxiety and stress, caryophyllene has amazing anti-inflammatory benefits, and myrcene is a pain reliever, anti-inflammatory, and a sedative. When combining Wedding Cake’s terpene profile with the THC measurements of up to 21.o%, it is no surprise that consumers report feeling relaxed, happy, euphoric, uplifted, and hungry on this strain. It has been recommended for those battling stress, depression, pain, anxiety, and insomnia, with potential negatives of dry mouth, dry eyes, dizziness, anxiety, and paranoia.

​Today I will be medicating with Wedding Cake to combat anxiety, depression, stress, and fatigue. Starting the session off at 8:09 p.m. with two hits from a glass pipe, with the flavor is peppery and sweet with undertones of vanilla dancing on my pallet. The aroma is sweet and peppery. At 8:11 p.m. I am starting to feel a little mood uplift and a slight cerebral shift in my level of focus. My head feels like it is feeling up with helium and is entering a dreamy state. There is a sense of paranoia creeping in early on that has the “everyone knows I am high” mindset, which is not great for the anxiety, but I have been able to talk myself down so far. At 8:19 p.m., I can feel the paranoia starting to mellow out and the mood uplift continues as I roll into a happy, mellow, and floaty cerebral buzz. My body is starting to feel really calm and my legs are feeling a little tingly. I am not feeling any changes to my level of fatigue and I am not finding that my focus has improved, but my anxiety has decreased noticeably.

​At 8:54 p.m., I realize I zoned out and I missed the 8:39 p.m. check-in. I am watching T.V and relaxing while just letting my mind wander. My body feels relaxed, I feel tired, and my mind feels stress-free. I am currently not experiencing any additional mood changes, and I continue to feel mellow and calm. My thoughts are wandering from things I need to do to assessing things that have been bugging me, to trying to determine how I will achieve certain goals. I am still experiencing the anxiety and paranoia flare-ups when I am in social situations, but when I am alone, I feel very relaxed and calm. At 9:09 p.m., I feel sleepy and my mind continues to wander as my head remains in a cloudy, dreamy state. I am still experiencing absolutely no sense of focus with this strain. My appetite is beginning to peak, and my mood is very calm and happy. At this point, depression, and stress I was feeling have all dissipated, but the fatigue has not been touched. The anxiety continues to intermittently flare-up depending on whether I am alone or around other. In a way, the dreamy cerebral state is almost intensifying this as it has made me so calm and relaxed that I could easily find myself drifting off to sleep.

​Rounding the corner to our 90-minute mark at 9:29 p.m., I am still feeling very foggy-brained, yet calm and relaxed. My mind is continuing to wander, and if I focus on activities that are quiet and I remain in a place where I can relax and just be alone, I am fine. However, anything that includes others, or is done in the presence of others continues to invoke twinges of anxiety. My level of focus continues to be very low, and I feel like my response times are very slow, which I am finding contributes greatly to the social anxiety I am experiencing. I am unsure as to whether I am overthinking things, or whether I am responding appropriately, and it continues to be difficult for me to follow the conversation, especially if there is more than one person involved. Continuing to track these effects until the end at 10:00 p.m., I am finding that now the level of clarity is much improved, and I feel extremely calm and mellow. Now that the effects have worn off, I am finding that social interaction is back to normal, my focus has improved, and I am left feeling very relaxed and happy. The depression has not returned, and it won’t be long before I head off to bed.

​This test was the second test I conducted for this strain. The initial test was done with 3 hits from a glass bowl, and the experience was similar, all the way down to the intensity of the anxiety and paranoia. It was the level of intensity of these negatives related to the effects that made me decide to retest this product using with two hits instead of three to see if the experience was any different. Unfortunately, other than the difference in the intensity, the experience remained the same. I found this strain helpful in lifting my mood, however the twinges of paranoia and anxiety really caused some fluctuations in the mood enhancement and stress relief. I found that I had to be alone in order to fully enjoy this strain and reap the benefits of its effects. I was disappointed that both tests caused me such anxiety and paranoia because I was excited about this strain, and GSC is one of my favorite strains and I have never experienced these effects previously. I have also tried strains with Cherry Pie, and I have never experienced anxiety or paranoia with those products either. I cannot say for sure what it was that caused these negatives in the two tests that I conducted, but I can say that the results were enough for me to definitively say that this strain is not a great fit for me. This is not to say that this would not be a great product for others out there, and I can say that if the paranoia and anxiety did not arise, the mood enhancing properties of this strain are fantastic. For me, I would have to rate this product at 4.0 stars. Again, it is not that this is not a fantastic product, it is well packaged, well grown, excellent quality, and as always, I commend Sira Naturals on another job well done, but the genetic makeup of the strain was just not the right fit for my personal needs. Sira, I still mark this as another great product for the books. Keep up the great work.

If you are a patient, or adult above the age of 21 in Massachusetts, check out the following link for where you can purchase this product:

https://www.siranaturals.org/where-to-buy-cannabis-massachusetts

Well my friends, we have reached the end of this review. Thank you for joining me and stay tuned for more product reviews!

Disclaimer:

****Please remember, this blog is an account of my personal experience with this product. Not everyone has the same experience with every product and that is okay. I always recommend starting out with one or two hits to see if that is enough, and you can always increase your dose from there.*****

[hazbinextgeneration]

These Few Moments

How does one decide another's worth? How does one predict another's personality or their impact they leave behind? Well unless you can see into the future and know for sure what you're dealing with then you're in for surprises. Which is what happened to him not too long ago. He could admit(just to himself) that he never expected to be surprised by someone he originally perceived as an easy pawn to his own needs. He never expected to be the one drawn to something so opposite of himself. But here he was, one moment minding himself the next- She didn't even know he was watching as she shifted through the small stack of papers in her hands. Her purple eyes narrowed and scrunched snout in thought. Suddenly her purple eyes lit up and she turned to him. He adverted his eyes just in time to not arose suspicions. "Everything seems organized already." "Is it now?" She nodded before leaning arcoss the desk to show him the neat stack of papers to him. His eyes glazed over the newspaper in his hand, raising a brow at her work. "Excellent! Now, why don't you put those away, Pet? Im sure you'll be busy with other things tomorrow." She rolled her eyes but leaned away. "Ok. I get the hint." He chuckled but sat back. A slight pang of pain shot up his left arm from the movement of his body but gritted his teeth and bit it down in front of company. Just a slight cramp from signing nothing but papers all day. Anyones arm would be sore....Come to think of it. How long had they been at this paper pushing fiasco? A couple hours by the way his wrist was feeling. He reached it out to grabb at the mug on the desk when another throb coursed through his arm. A single hiss escaped his gritted teeth which caught her attention. Her brow rose and she gave him a questioning look. "Are ...you alright?" His grin came back up. "Of course. Being tired is no problem..." His eyes glanced too the cup for a moment. "..Why don't you make yourself useful and get me some more coffee, Flower? Im going to need more energy if Im going to deal with this." "Alright. You're the boss." "And don't forget that.~" She rolled her eyes but received the mug whilst standing up. Grin still present on his face. She gave him another look before laying down the papers with her other hand and turning around. He waited for her back to turn and she was walking away before grimacing and holding up his sore wrist up to his face with a hiss. His muscles were cramped and tight when he moved the red digits. Just great. He rotated the pained appendage causing more pain and his eye to twitch in irritation. Mumbling to himself, he carefully set the wrist back down onto the desk and reached his good arm over to grab the papers. Slapping them down in front of him and staring at the words typed upon them. Eyes furrowed in irritation. He didn't notice the return of the lady who stopped momentarily upon seeing his annoyed expression. She frowned slightly upon noticing it. Did she do something wrong when she organized them? Or was he not happy with something written on it? She gulped down the rock in her stomach and put a smile on her face. "Hey." He flinched a bit and looked up at her. She held up the now warm mug. "You're drink's ready." He grumbled and made a motion for her to come in. She did but tilted her head to look at his face. "Is everything ok?" "Lovely," he grumbled. She placed the mug by his free hand and straightened back up. He didnt make an attempt to grab it at first and instead glanced up at her. "Amalfia.... Would you give me a moment? I....have something to take care of." She gave a puzzled look, but it was probably best not to argue when Lou was in a bad mood. So Amalfia turned and began making her way out. He initially cursed under his breath and subconsciously reached for the mug as he always did when he was irritated- ...The sound of a demonic cry and shattering glass made Amalfia jump and spin back around towards the desk to a very.....panicked scene. The plant demon hissed and clutched onto his wrist, the mug shattered in bits on the floor and liquid spilt all over the desk and by the looks of it him. Well she wasn't one to stand by while her boss was in pain. Hurrying over, her hand grabbed his shoulder. "Oh my god! Are y-?" His head snapped to her. "IM FINE!!" She immediately let go and stood back a couple steps back from the flashing red eyes. Taking a couple of deep breaths, he blinked and slowly slumped back from the tense pose he was in, giving a more calm look. The two stood there for a moment before Lou cleared his throat and excused himself from situation. Still clutching his wrist. ********************** The pain Hadn't reduced surprise, surprise. But instead hurt more if that was even possible ironically. Which irritated him further. The calm darkness of the room brought some ease to his mind at least, couldn't say the same for his hand, which was stiff as a board and slightly burnt from the hot drink spilling all over everything, but that one was on him to be honest. He sighed and stretched his body out slowly. It was going to be a long night with this problem. He almost didn't hear the knock at the door but looked up anyways. "...." Sighing he rubbed his face. "If this is a report for anything, it can wait until morning." There was a small silence, and he thought whoever it was left, when the doorknob turned and the door opened slowly with a creak. The plant demon rose a brow but stared in slight surprise when a white face poked into the entrance, she gave him an uncertain look before asking- "Do you still want me to leave?" "Uh...N-No. No. Don't just stand there." He gestured a hand. "Come in. And close the door behind you." She did but slowly. The door was closed with a click and she stood there silently. He regarded her with a raised brow before looking back down to his wrist. "Is there something wrong?" She didn't say anything for a moment but looked down in guilt. "Im sorry. " ".....Excuse me?" "I said Im sorry. I didn't know you would burn yourself...Im sorry." Silence. "Don't be." ...She blinked and looked up at him. "w-wha-" "You heard me. Don't apologize for something you didn't do." He glanced up at her from his sitting position. "It wasn't your intention to harm me was it?" "What?! N-No!" "Well there you go." "Why are you holding your wrist like that?" He gave her a questioning look and she pointed to his arm. "Are you ok?" she held out a hand towards him. When he didn't pull away she gently took a few steps and softly grabbed his good arm. Her eyes flashed confused worry at him. "Does it hurt?" When she reached her other hand towards his hurt wrist, he gave a sudden inhale of pain and he stopped. "Its...sore. Nothing I can't take care of myself." "I can see that." "I've suffered worse." "I don't doubt that, but you're more stubborn than a hellhorse." He gave an offended look but froze when she came around to the other side of him and sat down, gently taking his hand in hers. He gave her a confused look and she smiled. "I have an idea. My father used to have bad cramps and aches, my mother used to fix them easily. If you'll let me try that is?" When he didn't answer, she delicately pressed down on the sore flesh. Immediate pain spiked up his arm but he bit down any hisses and instead opted for digging his free hand into the mattress. Amalfia didn't seem to notice as she continued to carefully press down onto the tender flesh in strides. After a minute, the tightness in his palm decreased and he was left with a dull pain. She noticed his body loosened up on that tense aura and smiled. "Starting to feel better?" He hummed. "I suppose." His red eyes glanced over her working hands before trailing up to her face. "....You're solution is acceptable." A snort. "Just acceptable? Your way would've left you in another hour of aches and pains and acting like Midnight when one of her potions explodes." The comparion made him chuckle. "My dear. I am more capable of controlling my emotions than her." Purple eyes glanced up at him in amusement. "Oh? So acting like a baby because of a little cold air is capable control?" "Ill have you know that cold wind has severe damage on plant life, I have a right to be upset." She giggled. "Well, you're the boss." "And don't you forget that." "I haven't." She stopped and gave him a look. "To be quite honest, I think you're not given enough credit as far as Im concerned." His ears perked up at her answer. "Oh really?" She nodded. "And what do you mean by that, Pet? Id love to hear from you., She rolled her eyes. "And inflate your ego? I don't think so.....But I will say you're more agreeable and understanding than most men I've met. And actually know what you're doing. Not to mention tolerable. I don't see how you can deal with all the stuff around here with Disease and-..." She stopped upon seeing the smirk on his face. "...What?" "Don't let me stop you. Please, continue.~ But I believe you forgot a few of my better qualities.~" This sent her into a small giggle fit. Making him smike wider. "You know I have those qualities. Helping me deal with the idiots I work with....But not you. In all honestly, your work is quite admirable. " "....You really think so?" He paused for a moment, looking into those dark purple eyes staring back at him. She patiently stared back. Those purple eyes blinked and looked down to the feeling of those red digits closing around her own hand. Pink rushed to her cheeks and her body flinched when something touched her cheek. The red eyes holding neutral emotion towards the situation between them. "Yes." ********************************* Something I did with Amalfia x Lou. Lou belongs to @Palettepainter

[scanlonblogs]

Five Ways to Lower Stress Levels

    It is natural to become stressed, but we should do what we can to calm ourselves.  Stress can lower productivity, focus, and our quality of life.  Thankfully, there are many ways to calm ourselves when stressful situations arise.  Here are five ways to lower our stress levels.

1. Catch Yourself Overthinking

     Overthinking is something everybody handles differently.  We usually overthink when we are unsure or do not fully understand a situation.  Most people expect the worst, stressing themselves out in the process.  However, we usually do not find ourselves in these worst case scenarios, later realizing we were overthinking the whole situation.  Throughout this ordeal, we commit self-sabotage, stressing ourselves out and behaving irregularly because of our assumptions.  We end up being disappointed in ourselves for thinking and behaving the way we did.

     The best way to avoid self-disappointment and unnecessary stress is to catch ourselves overthinking.  It sounds simple, but it can be difficult when focused on the circumstances.  Ask yourself, “am I overthinking?,” when negative thoughts arise, moving your attention away from the negatives and allowing yourself to assess the situation.  Doing this consistently can train your brain to analyze a situation rather than assuming the outcome.  This can help in avoiding the unnecessary stress and drama that inevitably comes from overthinking.

2. Change Your Mindset

    Some people do not believe they are deserving of happiness, simplicity, or resolution, so they expect the negative.  This causes unnecessary stress, sadness, and a lack of confidence.  It also makes people feel like they are unable to control their lives, which can be nerve racking.  What they do not realize is positivity and negativity are controlled the same way, through one's personal mindset.  It is easy to think positively as it is to think negatively.  The reason why people have a tough time grasping this is because they rarely try to think outside of the negative.  However, people who think positively will notice a difference in their mood and the way they handle situations.  People are happier, more confident, and feel in control when they focus on the positive.  It makes them feel as if they are strong, able to handle difficult situations without losing themselves.  Do your best to find the positives in every situation.

3. Breathe Deeply

    Deep breathing has a multitude of mental and physical benefits, many of which contribute to relaxation.  When we are stressed, scared, or nervous, our minds race, our heart beats faster, and we lack the focus necessary to remain calm.  Breathing deeply can help with all of these problems.  By focusing on breathing, you are moving your attention away from the stress-related situation, allowing yourself to think clearer.  The heart beats slower, returning to normal, and muscle tension decreases, allowing for physical relaxation.  Deep breathing may not resolve the matters at hand, but it is useful for calming the mind and body and regaining focus.  This, in turn, will make it easier to solve problems and accomplish goals.

4. Get Your Mind off the Situation

    There is nothing more stressful than thinking about a stressful situation.  Instead of focusing on what is causing the stress, it is a good idea to get your mind off of it.  Getting your mind off the stressful situation, even if it is only for a few moments, can help dramatically.  It allows us to ‘recharge our batteries,’ which helps to regain our focus and strength.  Listening to music, playing a game, or relaxing with a hobby are all effective methods.  By doing so, you are able to return to the stressful situation more relaxed, having the focus and the mental strength to deal with it effectively.

5. Sleep

    Sleeping is one of the best ways to relieve stress.  Stress can lead to exhaustion, and when we are tired, a stressful situation can feel much worse.  We also tend to think and act through emotion when we are tired, which is not the best approach.  When we sleep, we replenish the energy spent, giving our body a break and letting our mind drift away.  We feel refreshed upon waking up.  This is the best time to look back on the stressful situation, analyzing it logically rather than emotionally.  This, in turn, allows you to reach a logical conclusion and act accordingly.  So, it is better to sleep on it rather than act out through emotion when stressful situations arise.  This will allow you to better assess the situation before doing anything you may regret.  It will also allow you to relax and deter from unnecessary stress.

What do you do to lower the stress in your life?  Do you use any of these methods?  Let me know in the comments!

Song of the Blog:

Today's Song of the Blog is "Free Fallin'," by Tom Petty!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1lWJXDG2i0A

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Special Thanks:

   Thank you @sunnycosmology​ for continuously supporting what I do.  Your kind words are part of the reason why I keep moving forward.  Also, YOU, SCROLLING THROUGH THIS BLOG, thank you for reading.  I thoroughly enjoy talking with my readers, so shoot me a message if you want to chat!  Thank you!