#nothing the show could live up to
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wormzandgutz Ā· 4 months ago
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Human Kwami designs, Trixxā€™s design is my buddy @luckychatons ā€˜s
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turtleblogatlast Ā· 7 months ago
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[ cw: violence mention / death mention / ]
Will never stop thinking about how Leo, all alone in an endless void and being beaten again and again and again by the only other living thing around, still finds comfort in that space. The situation he was in was completely hopeless, and in any other circumstances he would not have escaped, at least not fast enough to save him from permanent (or even fatal) damage, be it physical or mental.
And yet, despite the bleakness of his situation, despite the agony and helplessness, all he needs is one glance at a crumbled photograph, one glance to remember his family, and thatā€™s enough of a reason for him to smile.
Maybe thatā€™s why his powers center around manipulating space - because no matter how much space is between them, no matter how dire his own situation may be, just the thought of his family, alive and okay, is enough to give Leo hope.
#rottmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#rottmnt leo#rise leo#the prison dimension is horrifying on its own#add in a monstrous being that towers over you and has vowed to ensure your suffering?#god I canā€™t imagine how scary that is#Mikey opening the portal was a miracle because if he hadnā€™t managed it there#itā€™s really up in the air what could have become of Leo#personally I subscribe by the theory that you straight up canā€™t die in the prison dimension#so itā€™s a prison in all ways#but the thought of a Leo who manages anyway who adapts and continues to have hope despite it allā€¦#Leo saying heā€™s nothing without his family is a double edged sword really#because the thought of his family alone is all he needs to live. to hope.#to smile#nothing without themā€¦but theyā€™re EVERYTHING to him#and maybe he doesnā€™t realize it butā€¦the feeling is mutual#one thing too is that hope that comforts Leo so much is not just that#should he think his family needs help - that hope can turn into determination#Iā€™m unwell about this family#actually on my point of their powers - I truly do think the abilities tie in not only to their personalities#but to their relationship to family and love in general#kinda like love languages in a way#Mikey with his chains and time abilities values being around his family the most - he wants them to experience living in the moment togethe#Donnie is someone who is 100% a gift giver to show his love - his constructs are exactly that arenā€™t they? gifts of his mind#Raph is someone who willingly bears the weight of the shield - he protects his family like the best big brother possible#and Leo - he goes off on his own a lot but his mind is constantly on his family anyway#like a sailor at sea no matter how far he travels the compass always point in one direction - and for him that compass points home#even if he canā€™t make it back - itā€™s still there#and thatā€™s enough
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faaun Ā· 3 months ago
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the way that diff languages sound r so fascinating they're all different and all so vivid
#russian is like the surface of a feather like it's light but not exactly ā€œsoftā€ but still very delicate#german is . cute ? i think it's adorable . it has a lot of momentum it makes u wanna talk fast and talk a lot#like it's squishy . sleek surface w a soft inside#thai is like song . it's like interprative dance or maybe a trust-fall . everything follows from the previous thing#it feels like a little fairy flying up and letting itself fall and flying up again and so on (for fun). its so beautiful but also playful#mandarin chinese is like . idk why but it gives me the same vibe the concept of Observation does . like to read and to see and absorb#and then to translate that into smth else . like . imagine a poet people watching or an artist preparing a canvas w practiced hands. thats#the vibe. soft and elegant and musical but like...in a way that feels lived-in. arabic feels wise ? like music or poetry u read#and feel nothing about then years later u stumble on and it applies to everything in ur life. that kind of vibe. like it knows more than u#and itll make sure ur heart and soul grows as big as its lexicon . polish is like snowflakes falling . it has the feeling of complexity and#elegance but it's also so so light and slippery and...maybe not elusive but the feeling of losing a dance partner in a waltz ? like fun and#light but also an underlying elegance and somberness still . turkish is like the feeling when u get a text from ur crush#and your heart tightens and you cant tell if it's really painful or really amazing . it feels like unrequited love . or a caress#or making out with someone when you know its the last time you'll see them. its beautiful in a yearning longing way#korean is like joking around w ur friends and you've stayed up until like almost 5 AM and youre so delirious that everything is funny#and ur speaking kind of lightly and openly and everything you say holds a lot of weight and doesnt matter at all. you laugh at everything#and youre practically talking in inside jokes and watching the sunrise together . one of them hits u on the shoulder lovingly. ur by a fire#yoruba feels like the metatheory of the matatheory . abstraction until it circles back to intuition or maybe#it feels like plotting the route of a comet or maybe like the soft warm whirr of statistics. trying to verbalise beauty somehow#when you know the best thing you can show it is by telling everyone just look!! look at the sky just look!#anyway yh i think i could do this for every language ever tbh
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arosebyan0thername Ā· 6 months ago
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If there are a million Reeve Carney as Orpheus fans in the world, I am one of them. If there are only two Reeve Carney as Orpheus fans in the world, I am one of them (Eva Noblezada is the other). If there are no Reeve Carney as Orpheus fans in the world, Eva Noblezada and I are dead šŸ˜”
#hadestown#hadestown obc#reeve carney#eva noblezada#seriously im sick and fucking tired of the reeve carney hate on tiktok#'jordan fisher is the only orpheus that matters' 'jordan fisher shouldve originated orpheus on bway'#'they should replace the obc recording with jordan fisher' 'jordan fisher was the best thing to ever happen to hadestown'#shut up!!!!!!!#i adore jordan fisher but you are missing the point of theatre and hating on reeve in the process!!!!!#you can have a favorite but that doesnt mean the actors who are not your favorite shouldnt exist in that role!!!!!#but also your favorite is wrong!!!!#reeve carney brought more autistic swag to orpheus than anyone could possibly recreate!!!#he was naive he was soft spoken he was unaware of social expectations!!!!!#jordan fisher has such a raw powerful voice and thats not what orpheus needs!!!!! hes just a lil guy!!!!#hes just a lil guy who accidentally had a battle of the bands with the devil and won#because he has nothing in his brain except sing and love his girlfriend!!!!!#i love jordan fisher in everything ive ever seen him in and i adore his voice but please stop putting other actors down#im not a huge fan of the way jonjon briones plays hermes but im not out here talking shit about him!!@#or saying he should never have had the part in the first place#(btw i was joking about the 'your favorite is wrong' thing because - again - literally defeats the point of theatre)#please find ways to say that jordan fisher is your favorite without putting reeve carney down#and also please give reeve carney a chance and dont dismiss him just because he is less conventionally attractive#and hip in popular media and on social media#please give the role a chance for what it is and not just which actor you already like#i was pissed when i first found out they were taking damon daunno out for the obc and adding reeve#the only thing id ever seen or heard him in at that point was the live action rocky horror with laverne cox#and he was fucking riffraff#i was mad!!! i didnt think he could do it!!! but i love the show and i gave him a chance and now hes my all time favorite#between both touring casts ive seen and the pre bway cast recording and jordan fisher#just please stop being mean and give him a chance
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silentsockfeet Ā· 6 days ago
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with the obvious addendum that act 3 isnā€™t out yet and we canā€™t form true opinions until the showā€™s officially done, iā€™m still really feeling like it could have maybe benefited from a third season. theyā€™re hitting all the right plot points and those moments are full of really intense emotion, but everything in the middle feels so underwhelming in comparison and so much of it still feels rushed to me. idk
#arcane#arcane spoilers#i could kinda deal with it act 1 bc there was a lot to cover through the fallout after s1. but act 2 i'm reallyyyyyy feeling it#like dont get me wrong it's still so so so good#and i guess that's what makes it so much more frustrating#like you can see all the ways it can be just that littlest bit even better#but i guess if the biggest complaint viewers have about your show is that they want more then that already says a lot you know#anyway#it's the warwick / isha plot that bugs me specifically bc isha (love her to death) feels lowkey like a cop out#introduce a kid just to heavy push the 'cycle of violence' 'find your humanity again' character arcs only to kill her six episodes later#like EVERYONE was saying 'ive never seen a character so obviously created to die'#the subversive thing would be to have her live and show the cycle of violence is ending or something#but here's another broken kid killed by the system here's more proof that jinx is. well. a jinx.#idk idk idk#and warwick. i wanted so much MORE#heavily build up warwick all through act 1 just to have him die end of act 2#we barely got to see him at full power.#we barely got to see him with vi and jinx.#we barely got to see him reckon with the man he was and the monster he is now.#we got next to nothing before he's just dead. again#and again those scenes hit SO GODDAMN HARD. THEY ARE GOOD. but they couldve hit even harder if they just had more time to flesh it out !!!!#but again again no act 3 yet so who goddamn knows at this point#they aint dead til we see the bodies and even then they might not be dead bc thats just how arcane works#but fuck i just wish we sometimes had time to sit and FEEL things before the next new thing starts#ok im done rambling i just had to say something somehwere because its driving me insane#my posts
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pleasedontcareaboutme Ā· 2 months ago
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It's missing my father hours rn so imma just dump a bunch of pictures here and cry
( sorry i don't know the source of anything I just had them on my phone)
(also dont read the tags i just need to let it out lol)
#I just realized I can call him dad easier than my real dad and now I understand why am I so damn attached to him#I always knew he was a parental figure for me#but now I connected the dots#How when u have an absent dad and a d34d mom a guy shows up in ur life#that tells u life advice that both of ur parents failed to do so#and makes u feel safe the first time in ur life#ofc ud become attached#i know for sure its unhealthy how much i love and miss him#he occupies most of my thoughts honestly#But how could i not cling to him so much when he was the only one who gave me hope in life#i try to keep going and even tho he is not here i keep telling myself whatever he taught me. i keep reminding myself he wants us to live an#bloom and be free#and that's what ill try to do#but you know somedays i wish i could just disappear and be wrapped in eternal happiness#its so fucking hard to pull yourself out of the slump man im so fucking tired im so so tired#somedays i wish id have the courage to off myself but i know that deep down i want to live and ive always wanted to live but i have no idea#how to live. i feel like i finally found a purpose and someone i love. but at the same time im always doubting myself and im scared of losi#g this little hope again and i know i should cherish and use it instead but each day i have this anxiety because rn i have nothing else if#lose this i seriously will lose everything atp. but ill still try bc rn its this or death so i should try im just damn tired yes anyways#sorry for being depressing some days just dont work out but thats okay#yes at the same time i want to get out of my head and try to find some friends but i cant deny that im highkey fucked up and i just cant le#go of my past and i still feel like that helpless unloved kid and idk how to form relationships this way. i dont trust myself at all so idk#how to trust others. and i feel like in order to find ppl that would love me i have to overshare abt my whole lifestory bc it still dictate#my life heavily. and since i met this band its better cuz im learning to deal w it and i want to heal from everything but yes at the same t#me who would wqnt to be friends w. someone that has like a year of life experience and 18 years of depression lol#so yes its complicated. bc i have friends but im like the funny friend. the one that is as shallow as puddle and has no problems but honest#y im genuinely sufferint qnd have been sufferinz all my life so i want to come out of my funny friend role. but that wojld mean i have to t#ll the shit i went through to all my friends but tbh it would be so random so ye. i do have a plan though. how it could work. But yes im ti#ed have been tired for 7 years now. But this time around i hope i can successfully get out of this torture cycle lol.#ok sorry this is what happens after puberty guys i could beva research case for a damn mental institute atp xdd
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a-sad-mage Ā· 2 days ago
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How rich is the Shane Gang?
In the early episodes it's implied they don't have much, and actively save up to buy equipment.
Like Pronto admitted to 'borrowing' money from the others in the Club Slug episode, and Eli expressed his hesitance in trading slugs for equipment when they were short of money.
And then, like I wana say about six to seven months later when the whole thing with Dana stealing from Blakk and the Gentleman being set after her, Eli offers the Gentleman dubbled what Blakk payed for their plan to fake Dana's work.
Double What Dr. Blakk, the owner of a successful business and Railway that makes presumably millions not including the endorsements of Slugterras richest, was willing to pay.
Double
And again
Because the show takes place in a years time, Eli basically went from a broke teen hero, to rich enough to pay off one of the top assassins in the Caverns, in like 12 months.
Keep in mind, while Eli knows there are stashes hidden all around Slugterra filled with things he might need one day(not necessarily money) he has no idea where like 98% of them are.
And while sure, there is clearly stuff the gang gets up to in their off time, and going on adventures to find these Shane Cashes is plausible, how much are we willing to bet they found a cash with a comical amount of money?
Like I have no problem believing the gang have not only their personal savings, but a group fund for communal stuff/supplies. Or that, ever now and then, they get paid for some of the missions they do.
But it's been like, at least six months or so leading up the whole thing with the Gentleman, and unless Blakk was paying him the flattest of fees, how is it possible for Eli to pay double.
I would imagine that an assassin's fees aren't cheap either.
All I'm saying is that someone on the team won the lottery, got lucky chash hunting for Shane deposits, or something because dear god I have questions about their financial situation.
And no, Pronto technically being a King don't mean shit, it's been made pretty clear, for all his ego, Pronto isn't 100% cool with being King, and he is not smart with his money seeing as how he falls for scams.
Edit Nov/20/24: my brain is running on fumes- the 'double the pay' line is form a different ep but my bullshit about Eli being able to double any sort of pay at all still stands.
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leham-n-daavocado Ā· 5 months ago
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Just finished the third season of Bridgerton (it was an incredibly frustrating watch)...People have said that Penelope is named as such because of her nickname Pen and her being a writer... but has anyone thought of the reference to the Odyssey and Penelope being the wife of Odysseus? You know, she had to be loyal for 20 years while Odysseus gallivanted across the globe and was distracted/cheating on her Circe? I feel like it goes with the whole Polin narrative too. She's the one who had to wait for him to get a clue. And if you've read the Penguin version of the Odyssey, you know everyone is like omg! Odysseus, so amazing, the sacker of cities etc. Which parallels Colin's "glow up". Totally think it's more of a literary reference since the two of them are writers...
#bridgerton#bridgerton season 3#colin bridgerton#penelope featherington#polin#don't know how much this works for the book#didn't read the books#I ranted at my sister for an hour straight about this season (behated)#wtf was the character arcs for any of the characters this season? a whole lot of nothing..#the writers literally set everything up and then did everything in their power to make the arcs pointless#soooo many crimes of telling instead of showing#bridgerton was never high art but season 1 and 2 landed character and the audience buying into the relationships and cheering for the coupl#disappointed#literally feel like I hated polin in what was supposed to be their season#colin vascilates wildly... and there are like two scenes where i recognize the character he was is season 1 and 2#literally hated him for soooo much#really hate how the season wasn't about the couple but whistledown#and yet they couldn't show us WHY Penelope wants to keep being Whistledown besides telling us why so I just don't get why#they could not decide if whistledown is good or bad and settled on girlboss power!#but here i am like girl... you're ruining lives... you've ruined lives... it's just gossip#they literally screwed over all their characters for nothing#their scenes of intimacy don't land because they feel incredibly paint by numbers and often occur after intense confrontations#confrontations that do not logically make sense for sexy times#the mirror scene exists purely as plot so colin can later accuse Penelope of trapping him in marriage#like that's suuuuper ick#they made colin so incredibly ick i don't recognize him or want him with Penelope#even Penelope making the choice to be whistledown over her new family was insane and illogical based on how the plot developed#i watched the seaon twice to really pin down how I feel and ended up rewatching season 1 and 2 because season 3 part 2 pissed me off so muc#and it's sooo night and day#i just feel sad because i wanted to root for this couple too... but they made it unrootable
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nyan-bynary Ā· 4 months ago
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As cute as satosugu is, it's SO important to me that no matter how much they loved each other (romantically or platonically idrc to argue w/ ppl) they did NOT tell each other. That they lost their chance bc they were young and strong and full of hope and they thought they had all the time in the world to tell the other how they felt, y'know, like how teenagers are supposed to feel about life. But they couldn't be together, they couldn't have each other's company the way they really wanted. Their youths were forcefully taken away from them their emotions that they were still not fully settled on forced out of their hands because they had bigger more grave things to worry about now. It's so important to me that they were always doomed no matter what.
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sleepboysummer Ā· 4 months ago
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guys MY theatre is doing ride the cyclone. and i am not auditioning. on PURPOSE. promise me you'll love me anyways
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cent-scratchnsniff Ā· 22 days ago
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progressing through the myth of sisyphus again
#lobotomy corporation#lobcorp#netzach#netzach lobcorp#obligatory drawings. ive had the book since my freshman year in highschool but never ended up finishing it due to how its worded and the#structure of it.. i need to be in a very specific state to be able to focus. mostly for reading in general but even more so for this#i have done parts though. never in its entirety which is a shame its a very intriguing read. hopefully i can finish it and then reread to#fully process. it is just 138 pages after all. its just so Dense... enough of book shit though. LOBCORP!!!#living hurts but the body yearns for preservation and people want to Live. to live is such a crucial want even if the self doesn't recognize#it on its own. everything in the flesh is designed to try and keep you alive. pains to eat the signals to drink the fear of hurt and pain#the automatic jerk when pain is experinced. the signals to show pain. yet living hurts. to survive hurts. so to sleep#to numb the pain to go through escapism to shut your eyes. general ideas. to see such a thing addressed and spoken about and acknowledgement#of pain and how it gets to that point was very stunning to me. it felt so real. seriously its hard to Not consider such a thing and its#rather scary? moreso when one doesnt have the words to explain or able to see such a thing experinced. it felt amazing? to see such a thing#Wanting to Die yet not to Die and to live but living hurt so much and so to get by and for the pain to Stop one does anything to soothe it#suffering is tiring. suffering hurts. its empty yet its excruciating. the want for it to stop and to not be there and experince it anymore#be it through various means or to the extreme to force it so that Nothing Else could ever happen to you. even pain. ahh nuts not quite just#lobcorp its just ramblings in general somewhat related since i didnt reread the exact dialog lately.#anyway skethcy drawings yay... i am fine currently its not super bad as it was earlier just a fatal flaw of thinking a lot (rip)
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hii šŸ““
Okay so the thing is that I wanted a ā€œthe Zenin raised Megumi instead of Gojoā€ fic but the thing is that Iā€™m absolutely convinced that if the Zenin were the ones that took Megumi they wouldnā€™t actually take tsumiki too. The fandom consensus Iā€™ve personally seen has been that she would have been taken and mistreated by zenin for being a female non sorcerer but I personally think they would have just straight up left her behind.
They only bought Megumi. They keep non sorcerers and women as servants in their compound but all of them are Zenin themselves. Tsumiki isnā€™t related and I couldnļæ½ļæ½t really see any reason why theyā€™d want her. Which turned this into a fic where Tsumiki loses her brother, but sheā€™s trying to find him again, she swears. I think of it as my ā€œsiblings doomed by the narrative desperately try to write a new one where they can be togetherā€ fic.
The thing is that Tsumikis mom was one of those people who thought love and consumption were synonymous. She had a habit of getting caught up with assholes and justā€¦ having both of them chew on each other for a while until it turns into this horrible fucking bloodbath.
Tojis just another loser her mom got caught up in, but heā€™s Tsumikiā€™s favorite out of all the losers, because he gave her her brother. Her mom marries this random guy she barley knows and Tsumikis pretty sure she does it so they can both ditch their kids twice as much, secure in the knowledge that thereā€™s supposedly another person checking in. It works out great for them, because they both stop coming entirely. Itā€™s fine, because Tsumiki has Megumi and Megumi has Tsumiki and they donā€™t need anything else.
Itā€™s one of those things where they were in really unhealthy circumstances and it made their relationship a little bit unhealthy but not necessarily bad. They both had to grow up way too fast and deal with way too much too soon and become codependent on each other because they are, in the most literal way possible, dependent on one another. Neither of them know how to love in a way that doesnā€™t involve sacrificing themselves for their sibling, mostly because they donā€™t have a way that doesnā€™t involve that.
Theyā€™re in a sinking ship and tsumiki knows it. Their parents arenā€™t coming back. The money is going to run out sooner or later. Their problems are stacking up.
Megumi has confessed to her that he sees things that no one else does. When she asks him how he knows no one else sees them, he explains that theyā€™d say something if they did and wonā€™t say anything else. And she doesnā€™t know what to believe but she refuses to call him crazy. He tells her that monsters cling to her back and he fights them off for her. She patches up his bruises and cuts and tells him heā€™s brave and tries to figure out if sheā€™s just imagining that her back feels lighter after. He tells her that there are dogs that only he can see that have started following him around, and she tells him she believes him and can never remember, later, if she meant it or was just saying it.
The last time Toji came by, he left them more money than tsumikis ever seen in her life, took them to ice cream, told them that he was sorry he was so shit at this and that the money was Megumiā€™s share in a payment. It was for something he was going to help daddy with later. Tsumiki and him were to use it to take care of themselves and be healthy, because Megumi couldnā€™t help him later if he wasnā€™t. And tsumiki was always afraid of what he meant by that, but in the end, she let it slip her mind. After all, Toji hadnā€™t been by in ages. He probably wouldnā€™t come by at all.
And he didnā€™t. But others did. Two men sheā€™s never met before are waiting outside their building one day, and when they see Megumi, they laugh. But the thing that Tsumiki can never get out of her mind later is that she swears they werenā€™t looking at Megumi directly. They were looking at his dogs.
Tsumiki basically tries to get Megumi and powerwalk past them, but theyā€™re a lot bigger and a lot stronger and thereā€™s nothing she can do, really. They have a brief conversation about whether they should take her too, before one decides that Toji only sold him his kid and to leave the other behind. This makes both of them try to run, but thereā€™s nothing either of them can do to overpower the men, and the men say that ā€œNaobito would go ballistic if they left the ten shadows behindā€ so they take Megumi and leave her.
They put Megumi in a car and shove Tsumiki to the curb outside of it, and she tried to hold onto his hand, she swears. She grabbed at the car door even when the car started moving, and she banged on the windows, and she watched as Megumi kicked and punched and screamed inside, until one of them hit him and he went still. She ends up falling and hitting her head when the car picks up speed, and when she wakes up again, the cars gone and she has no idea where it went.
And it becomes a foundational moment for who she is. I think she was just intensely lonely before Megumi and poured a lot of herself into this idea of a family together. Tsumikis never able to shake the moment of her being outside the car and Megumi being on the inside, and not being able to get into him. She can never again get what she felt in that moment out of her head.
She goes to the police and tells them that itā€™s her little brother, his dad sold him but she wants him back, and theyā€™re like ā€œā€¦ā€. The issue is that apparently her mom can pick up the damn phone if the police call and she shows up, spins some lie about how her and the stepdad split up and he took the kid with him, they never adopted each others kids so it was within his rights, Tsumiki was taking the separation hard and acting out. She lies, basically, because toji hadnā€™t kept up his end of the deal and dropped in to check in (neither had she) and his kid wasnā€™t her responsibility, he could do what he wanted with him. She doesnā€™t want the police poking around the way she lives. Just let the kid go because heā€™s probably dead and not her real brother anyway.
Tsumiki refuses to give up on him. They were both kids who no one cared about but they cared about each other and that had to be enough. But sheā€™s seven with no support and zero idea on how to find him. She starts skipping school to look for him in random streets, puts up flyers, canā€™t go outside without looking for him. She gets held back a year in school because of how much she skips and she canā€™t bring herself to care. She buys him gifts on every birthday and writes him letters she canā€™t post because sheā€™s going to find her brother and sheā€™s going to prove to him that she never once stopped looking for him. She just. She needs him to know that she never stopped looking for him. She needs to find him and be able to honestly tell him she never stopped trying.
One day her mom comes back in clothes she canā€™t afford and comes with movers they shouldnā€™t be able to afford and announces a move they definitely canā€™t afford. Tsumikis absolutely opposed to going because if her brother comes to look for her, she needs to be in their old apartment so he can find her. She doesnā€™t have much of a choice in the matter. They have mysterious new benefactors who are setting up a trust to take care of tsumiki with a very generous stipend for her mom but they have to move to Sendai as a stipulation of getting the money.
Itā€™s not until the attorney whoā€™s managing her trust hands her a set of glittery blue butterfly hairpins that tsumiki realizes her mom sold her brother a second time.
The thing is that tsumiki had this one cheap set of butterfly hairpins sheā€™d always stopped to look at in the store when she took Megumi to go grocery shopping. Shed never buy them, because they couldnā€™t afford it, but it was the thing she wanted most openly in front of him. She was always secretly really insecure about her hair, because they were the kind of poor where bar soap was a luxury they could only sometimes afford and kids at school made fun of how her hair was dirty and frayed. Megumi was the only one who ever saw how badly she wanted those stupid hair clips. If they had to give her a set of butterfly hair clips, itā€™s because he demanded that they did.
Itā€™s basically implied that the Zenin are the ones paying for her care and upkeep due to an unspecified deal they cut with Megumi, but when they approached her mom with it, they added the caveat that Tsumiki had to be moved to a new city entirely and there could be no forwarding address left anywhere.
The zenins stance on tsumiki is, effectively, that sheā€™s a weakness Megumi needs to be weaned off of. They honestly assumed heā€™d just like, forget she ever existed and he. Did not do that. He actually pitched a total bitch fit. Tried to scale the compound walls. Bit multiple people including the clan leader. But heā€™s got the ten shadows, heā€™s heir to the clan, and he canā€™t be caught up on some random non sorcerer who isnā€™t even a Zenin. They end up agreeing to pay for her to live very comfortably if he starts cooperating more but they want to make sure that he canā€™t ever find her again if he does ever succeed in running away.
Tsumiki is at once full of hope and hopeless, because on one hand, the butterfly clips prove that Megumi still loves her and remembers her, at least in her mind. But at the same time, sheā€™s being moved to Sendai and doesnā€™t know how theyā€™ll ever find each other again. She doesnā€™t honestly know if theyā€™d recognize each other if they saw each other again. She wears the butterfly clips every day, even when she gets too old for the style, because sheā€™s more confident about her brother recognizing them than her.
The thing about tsumiki is that she doesnā€™t understand hate. She just doesnā€™t. Her mom and toji always got caught up in these perceived slights and revenge and never once let go of the past. Theyā€™d destroy themselves if it meant taking down the people they hated with them. She never wanted that. She wanted to live with the people she loved and sheā€™d happily turn around and forget everything, all the pain, all the searching, if it just meant she could go back to being megumis sister.
This isnā€™t about hate. This is about that moment outside the car, where her brother was inside and she couldnā€™t get in to him. This is about how helpless and small she felt when they shoved her to the curb and ripped megumis hand out of hers. She needs to make sure that when she finds Megumi, she can take him home again. So she decides she needs to learn how to fight.
Itadori Yuuji has the constitution of an ox and the strength to match it, and he is known for getting in fights with bullies and trouncing them so thoroughly that itā€™s never a question of who wins when the fight starts. Heā€™s insanely physically capable and can hold his own in a fight with ease. Heā€™s also nice and kind and Tsumikiā€™s comfortable enough asking him to teach her how to throw a punch or two.
She is bad at it.
So fucking bad at it.
But she never gives up, and Itadori is nice enough to keep teaching her despite how embarrassingly horrible she is at it all. He always asks her why she wants to learn so bad, she doesnā€™t seem to like it all, and she never answers his question honestly.
In their last year of middle school, their class has a trip to Kyoto. She, Itadori, and the rest of their group walk into some random restaurant in the city and have barely sat down when someone comes inside, starts searching every booth in the restaurant while shouting Tsumikis name.
And oh. They could recognize each other after all.
She looked for Megumi in every crowd she was ever in, but she didnā€™t consider that he was doing the same. Or that he would see her first.
Her brother grew up without her seeing it. Hes older, dressed in strange, expensive clothes, has a slightly bruised up face and split lip, but his eyes are the same, and he looks like the brother she remembered.
But a lot more nervous than Megumi ever was. He was a tiny, stoic child who didnā€™t take any shit and never showed fear, even when there were monsters that only he could see. But heā€™s nervous when he tells her that she probably doesnā€™t recognize him or remember him, but when she was a lot younger, heā€”
Megumi. Heā€™s her little brother. Of course she remembers him. Sheā€™s been looking for him everywhere.
Megumi didnā€™t smile much as a child, but he smiles at her then. He tells her he doesnā€™t have a lot of time and she tells him that they can leave out the back, and he never let her hold his hand as a child but he takes her hand so easily in that second. And just for a second, sheā€™s his sister again, and itā€™s everything she wanted.
They never make it out the back.
Two men come in. Megumi calls one of them uncle, and he goes stiff and flat the second he sees him. His uncle apologizes for his nephew, tells everyone that he always makes scenes when theyā€™re out in public, tells him to apologize to the nice people and leave. Megumi was mistaken.
Tsumiki trĆ­es to keep ahold of his hand. Really, she does. She tries to tell people to call the police. But megumis ā€œuncleā€ steps towards her and Megumi slams him into a table, and then suddenly Megumiā€™s the one insisting that they leave immediately. They can go. Itā€™s fine. Theyā€™re leaving. She loses ahold of his hand.
She tries to follow, but the other man restrains her. She learns that sheā€™s better at slamming plates into peoples heads than she is at punching, and at this point itadoris Friend In Danger Override has been triggered and he fucking tackles the dude, which gives tsumiki the clearing that she needs to chase outside after her brother. She gets out just in time to see him be pushed into a car, and sheā€™s had years to think about the last time this happened and figure out what to do differently. She throws herself in front of the car and refuses to move.
See her entire stance is that sheā€™ll sooner get run over and killed in the street than let them do this a second time, but she also can see Megumi trying to fucking punch the drivers head in from behind because heā€™s about to hit his sister. His uncles trying to restrain him, and just for a second, she sees his hands make the shape of the shadow puppets he used to show her as children. Something invisible slams her out of the way just as his uncle knocks him out.
She picks up a rock and tries to smash in the fucking window with it, and itadori has to pull her out of the way to keep her from getting her feet run over when the car finally tears out of the parking lot. She goes ballistic on him for stopping her because her brother was right there and she lost him again and she didnā€™t even get the license plate. He was right there.
The police basically do jack all again. Thereā€™s no license plate, no names they can follow up on, and theyā€™re still half convinced this is a settled custody issue even though tsumiki insists her brother was sold by his dad and is very plainly getting hurt wherever he is. Itadori is now a devoted advocate of finding tsumikis brother and reuniting them, and both basically kind of end up becoming really close to the other? Heā€™s taking care of himself and his grandpa alone, sheā€™s alone while her moms awol again, and they both become the others support system.
At one point, thereā€™s this random girl and boy who doesnā€™t speak who shows up to their school for indeterminate reasons. The girl is bored and twirling her glasses in one hand while the person in a suit that theyā€™re with asks the principal questions, and when tsumikis eyes catch at the right angle, she sees an invisible monster clinging to a classmates back through them. She realizes itā€™s exactly what Megumi always talked about and still remembers that the people who took him could see his dogs. She corners the two others in a room and tries to demand information about the invisible monsters or see if they know her brother or the people who took him, and immediately gets blown off. The fight escalates until the girl tells him that actually, yeah. She knows tsumikis brother. He is a very special person to some very powerful people, and the only way she can ever help him is to tell him that sheā€™s let go of him and that he needs to do the same to her. Thatā€™s the only message that the people who have him would ever let get through, and his life would get a lot better as soon as he got it.
The people who have him would give him anything in the world, except for her. He could be a lot happier and healthier than he is right now if he just agreed to stop trying to find tsumiki. If she really wants to help her brother, then she needs to let him go.
Tsumiki nails her in the back of the head with a milk carton when she tries to walk away. It sloshes out on her. Tsumiki did not intend this. She cannot admit that fact. There are some actions you just have to own when you do them. She tells the girl that heā€™s her brother and sheā€™s never letting go of him. Sheā€™s going to find him. They canā€™t keep him from her forever. She doesnā€™t care how long it takes her.
For a second, tsumiki really thinks this girl is going to kick her ass, but she doesnā€™t. She wishes her luck and tells her sheā€™ll need it, and itā€™s only later that tsumiki realizes she slipped the eyeglasses into her pocket.
And as it turns out, her brothers monsters were real all along.
There was a knife that toji left in the frame of his bed. Tsumiki confiscated it from Megumi as soon as he found it, and it was odd and strange and gave her bad feelings when she held it, and it can kill the things that gather on her back. When she follows Itadori to their local high school and joins the occult club in an attempt to find more people involved in this world of invisible monsters, she wears the eyeglasses and keeps the knife hidden in her bag.
It comes in handy when her senpais are trying to open this thing and suddenly thereā€™s like a fucking portal opening and Actually Letā€™s Not Oh Too Late Letā€™s Run Letā€™s Fucking Run.
They run.
Meanwhile at the hospital Megumi found out in very quick succession that his sister has fucking sukunas finger and also that thereā€™s a very over enthusiastic himbo who is the self appointed vice president of the Find Fushiguro Megumi And Bring Him Home Club who absolutely fucking refuses to leave his side. Sorry who are you. Why are you so enthusiastic about finding him. Megumi sort of was the one doing the finding there was a whole tracking situation and him waiting dramatically in the shadows like they just did it.
Anyway they run very very quickly to tsumikis school where she is dodging she is serpentining this is a fuckton of monsters oh holy fuck is that her brother?
The fight goes bad.
Tsumiki manages to follow itadori and her brother out at a much slower pace because sheā€™s not a freak of nature like itadori and shows up just in time to see her brother shouting at itadori to not eat the fucking finger while itadori is absolutely trying to eat the fucking finger.
She chucks her shoe at him. The finger goes flying.
Then the monster eats it instead.
Tsumiki: :o
Yuuji: :o
Megumi: fuck
Now thereā€™s a bigger monster and the fight goes even worse. Thereā€™s a lot of shouting. Itadori ends up with her knife. Then he ends up getting eaten and theyā€™re down both a knife and itadori, whoā€™s probably fucking dead. Then megumis insisting she run and sheā€™s insisting he shut the fuck up because itā€™s sort of taken a decade to get this close to him again and sheā€™s not fumbling the bag now because of a monster on the rampage. Have a sense of fucking priorities here.
Then itadori bursts out of the monsters stomach with the knife like the fucking Kool Aid Man and the fight is suddenly very over. Good job, team.
Gojo rolls up to his most stoic and eternally pissed off student having a dramatic and emotional reunion with his sister.
Yuuji, in a very bad whisper: no no so like sheā€™s been looking for him for years but he saw her in the restaurant
Gojo: :o go on
Yuuji: and then he got caught by like, I donā€™t know, he said he was his uncle or something but the dude acted so weird and creepy and they put him in a car and Tsumiki tried to stop the car but they got away
Gojo: *gasp* what no
Yuuji: I know! Anyway then I start helping her look for him but we canā€™t find him anywhere until Iā€™m at the hospital and he just walks up to me right?? And Iā€™m like ā€œdude I have been looking everywhere for youā€ and heā€™s like ā€œI have no idea who you are, Iā€™m here about that fucked up demon fingerā€ and Iā€™m likeā€”
Megumi, really trying to have a moment here: we can both hear you
And megumis like ā€œthis is uh. My new teacher. I guess. I am his only student. And he is uh. Enthusiastic. Do not linger in conversation with him.ā€
Tsumiki is lingering. She needs fucking intel so he canā€™t disappear again. Where does he go to school and can she transfer there. Itā€™s fucking wizard school? Will they take her even though sheā€™s not a wizard? She cannot emphasize enough that she will study any fucking subject they want so that way she can be close with her brother again she does not care if itā€™s applicable to her education or life. She can throw things at people itadori tell the man tell him how enthusiastically she will throw things at monsters for their weird fucking wizard school.
Itadori: she hit me in the face with her shoe like five minutes ago
Tsumiki: see???
Megumi keeps trying to forbid her from wizard school but sheā€™s technically the older sister so she has override rights. She will go to wizard school. How does she get wizard school to accept her.
And Gojos just really weird and off and keeps looking at Megumi and saying that he ā€œdidnā€™t know he had a sister.ā€
He really didnā€™t know that Megumi had a sister he wanted to stay with.
And then suddenly itā€™s like a switch is flipped and heā€™s back to his normal self telling them to leave everything to him, because heā€™ll make sure tsumiki can come back with them. And uh? Itadori? Weirdly physically capable kid who will apparently eat anything? Is he going to be good getting home after all this?
Itadori: actually if itā€™s not too much trouble can I go to wizard school too my grandpa sort of died half an hour ago and I donā€™t have plans for the rest of my life. Tsumikis kind of my best friend and Iā€™d like to make sure sheā€™s all good at wizard school. Iā€™m a really good fighter and I stabbed the last monster so like can I come too because you know. Dead grandpa. No family or future to speak of. Haha.
Gojo:
Megumi:
Tsumiki, softly: dude
Thereā€™s more after they make it to jujutsu high but this is already really long so we leave it here
#ask games#jjk#jujutsu kaisen#continuing my streak of becoming obsessed with minor background characters#other highlights include itadori trying to platonically wingman for tsumiki with her brother (because itā€™s been like a decade and she knows#nothing about him and he knows nothing about her and sheā€™s terrified he wonā€™t like her once they get to know each other again) so that way#itadori can be the one asking the get to know you questions and tsumiki doesnā€™t have to admit out loud that she and her brother know nothing#about each other only the inherent problem is that her brother is actually unfairly pretty and has a sort of dry wit and is reserved but#when you get to know him heā€™s such a genuine dude and oh fuck oh no heā€™s in trouble this is his best friends long lost brother he has to be#violating some kind of code here. Kugisaki stop laughing at him this is a crisis.#gojo basically backed out of teenage fatherhood when he saw Megumi walking around with the divine dogs because itā€™s one thing to butt heads#with a major clan over an outcast member itā€™s another to do it for their most sacred technique#he thought that Megumi would be better taken care of than anyone else in the clan as the person with the ten shadows and that heā€™d probably#be better off than with an emotionally broken seventeen year old who works at least 28 days a month and has no idea how to raise a child#he never realized that Megumi had a sister he wanted to stay with who the Zenin separated him from#he tells himself he would have intervened if he had known because heā€™s been secretly worried and guilty about not taking in Megumi after all#since Maki showed up and said some worrying things about the clan heir and his standard of living and got the confirmation when he met#tsumiki and realized that he could have kept them together all those years ago and didnt. megumi and tsumiki kind of haunt him with lost#potential because not only could they have grown up a family but they could have grown up his family. megumi doesnā€™t know why satoru gojo#of all people is being so weirdly helpful and intense about about sponsoring tsumiki and keeping her close to him
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musashi Ā· 12 days ago
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#gamers dont you love it when a friend breaks your heart#smashes every olive branch you extend toward them#accuses you of being the asshole when you fall apart about it#acts like they are sorry#and then just fully ghosts you 100%?#i am so fucking tempted to just give up man.#every time i meet someone and im like#''oh wait they seem normal? not hyperindividualistic? like someone who will like me always not just when im happy?''#''someone who wants to be my FRIEND not just a person in a discord call with me??''#and then i spread myself so fucking thin investing energy into the friendship#(which this person admitted wasn't even ENOUGH like i am SO EXHAUSTED from traumatic abandonment#and losing friends suddenly#that even me working at my MAXIMUM CAPACITY makes people feel like i don't like them)#every fucking time.#nothing turns out different. no matter how much work i put into it#the SECOND a person has the chance to abandon me. they will.#i am just sitting here with two forces inside of me#one who never wants to give up on love and friendship#and another who is so tired#i wish i could just be exhausted and burnt out#and someone or several someones. would love me anyways. love me enough that EVENTUALLY#i will grow my heart back#and i can love them threefold for all the love they showed me#but no one wants me even when i do have the energy to be a good friend so why the fuck would anyone want me like this#dude i am so sad i wasn't meant to live like this i was meant to make friends. close friends.#i just keep re-reading our last conversation before he ghosted me. maybe if i read it enough i can change the ending
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rolandapostatize Ā· 9 months ago
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cannot get over how theodore 7th time loop is written actually. 13 year old's suicidal tendencies resolved by having polite conversation with the person he loves most and whom he was doing all that for, and who has never before in his life clearly communicated with him at all, and who due to his own emotional immaturity decided that the best way to protect his desperate younger brother is to never talk to him and act as terrifying as possible around him. one unwell child eliminating another unwell child's problems, that he was contributing to, in a single conversation
like i cant get over how quickly the conflict was introduced and resolved.
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starflungwaddledee Ā· 1 month ago
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also i want to again apologise for how phenomenally behind i have been with reblogging/responding to artworks on here, including art drawn for me or propaganda for the tournament!!
i'm hoping to start getting to my backlog for this VERY soon, ideally within the next two weeks. so you may start to see an increase of this on your timelines. and if i haven't yet gotten to your artwork don't worry, i most likely have it in my drafts!!!
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opens-up-4-nobody Ā· 9 months ago
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#i walked into a situation today where my mom was effectively already dead. effectively bc her body was and is still alive. still breathing#painful groaning purrs. but her mind was gone yesterday. my dad said he showed her a picture of the mountains i took that day and told her#i loved her and she smiled. thats what he said. maybe he was just being nice. or maybe thats the last time she thought of me. i dunno. but#the human body is an incredible thing. shes got a heart still powering a broken body. too full of tumors to function anymore. stomach#streched like a pregnant mother. it happed really fast and now its happening very slow#im somehow probably better off than the rest of them. i only got here for the aftermath of a downslide. my daily life will b least effected#i only really saw her twice a year living so far away and she didnt text much. didnt call often. so life wont change much ill just kno shes#not there. which is sad. but theres nothing to b done abt it. life goes on. it hasnt been all bad tho. its nice to talk to my family abt her#how incredible she was. bc she was. wish her mom wasnt here tho. she doesn't deserve to b here. my mom wouldnt want her here. she didnt want#her here. but anyway. i wish her body would just let her go now. so we can sleep. so this can be over. so she can rest#but even like this shes stubborn and resilient. they say it could go on for days but i hope not. may the universe let her rest shes gotta b#so tired after 10 years of this. but i have no regrets. she knew how i felt abt her. and i dont think she had regrets either. she did so#much up to the very end. went out on a high note without the burdon of knowing it was coming#i dunno. its just such a strange experience to watch the empty shell of your mother sleeping like a gurgling baby#unrelated
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