#nothing genuine to say when he has to choose someone else to couple up with

[willowser]

love island bakugou, he'd be so pissed if someone else chose you before he had the chance at the recoupling 💀

[acourtofthought]

hi, so.. i'm genuinely curious. why do you ship gwyn and azriel? because for me, i don't think gwyn has shown any romantic interest in azriel, and even he himself thinks they're not close enough to be friends. do you think sjm is going to throw all of elriel's moments away in previous books just for a ship built off of a spark in the chest and a private dagger lesson which happened off page?

because if she does, i think it will be fan service. major fan service.

thank you.

You say all the E/riel moments but if you really care about what I have to say (as you felt the need to message me) I hope you'll actually pay attention to the things I'm telling you.

It's not all the E/riel moments. It's all the E/riel moments that were almost instantly followed up by Az's fixation on someone else or lack of true interest on his part.

Az figured out Elain was a Seer? He then went on and agreed that they shouldn't bother following through on her visions.

Az announced he'd get Elain back only after Cassian first said they'd get her back? He went on to disobey Feyre's orders to get Elain to safety so he could stay behind and save Feyre, risking Elain's life in the process. He also said he'd be the one who could also take Briar though it was Elain who helped save her, something Az never acknowledged. Just like he never acknowledged her saving him too when kicking the hounds and Cassian, Nesta when she stabbed the king.

Az gave Elain TT? That's because Mor begged him to sit out of battle. He sat out of the one thing he's known for, being the first to throw himself into danger, because the female he in canon loved at the time had tears in her eyes and asked him not to enter the fight. Also, he didn't bother to check on Elain after the war or provide his condolences for the loss of her father.

Az was so sweet taking the potatoes from Elain's hand? Only a few chapters before he was relieved not to have to get her a gift to help her celebrate her first Solstice after being turned fae and he went on to stare at Mor with heat and yearning while Elain sat in the room with them.

He stared at Elain's headache powder for a year while he imagined what she'd look like during sex? He was pissy towards Helion because of Helion's question on where Mor was. He interrupted Nesta's question to Feyre on whether Elain knew about the pregnancy to ask if Mor knew. And because he STILL looks at Mor with longing glances. "Few and Far between" doesn't equal Zero. It means they still exist though to a much lesser degree......all while he's supposed to be so captivated by Elain. He didn't bother asking Elain how she was doing after her fights with Nesta, didn't bother saying he'd help her train her powers. You know, important things when it comes to endgame couples.

Not to mention Az wasn't remotely affected by Elain's catatonic state, where she was withering away. Lucien was DEVASTATED. Az drew straws so he didn't have to stay behind and guard her. THAT'S supposed to be who I want for Elain? The IC was not allowed to enter the Rite otherwise it would guarantee death to them all. Nothing prevented Az from staying with Elain to guard her.

Did you read the TOG series? Did you see how many moments existed between Dorian and Celeana? Beautiful moments too. Did you see what transpired between Celaena and Chaol? She literally tells Chaol that she'd always choose him, she says that he is her home.

Tell me how anything that happened between Az and Elain is any more poetic than what we witnessed between Celaena and Chaol yet Sarah had no problems chucking that out the window.

How about the buildup between Nesryn and Chaol? Sarah had her travel with him to the Torres Cesme, she was willing to accept him with his disability yet Sarah knocked down that house of cards in Tower of Dawn.

Dorian and Sorscha?

Feyre was engaged to Tamlin for gods sakes.

I truly don't understand how you think buildup means anything in Sarah's books. Unless two characters are mates, Sarah will easily tear down whatever buildup once existed between two non mates.

Theia and Fionn were forbidden lovers yet she went on to stand by impassioned as he was murdered only to later be willing to give up everything for Aidas, her mate.

And though you'll refuse to see it, I think Sarah already ended them on Solstice. Az and Elain were doomed from the start and there has now been 7 months that have passed from Solstice until the events of HOFAS. We are given absolutely no buildup for the E/riel ship in all that time, not since Elain returned his necklace. There has been no on page bantering between them, no longing glances, not even an indiscernible peak out of the corner of their eyes at one another.

"All the E/riel buildup" except it's already gone? E/riels entire buildup amounted to an almost kiss that never happened in a bonus chapter which makes it pretty easy for Sarah to move on from considering she tore down Feyre's engagement to Tamlin within the span of a few chapters. And Feyre and Tamlin had an entire book dedicated to them.

You can ship E/riel still, of course, but you can't honestly act like it would be difficult for an author like SJM to walk away from whatever they had going since she had no issues breaking apart multiple other characters who shared so much more.

Serious question for you.

How many books do you read where at the very start of the novel, the two characters instantly want one another?

Did Claire want Jamie at the start of Outlander? Pretty sure she was married to and in love with her husband. She also tried to escape back to said husband after marrying and sleeping with Jamie.

I just read a book where the guy ends up helping a girl who was homeless and she's worried that he'll expect sexual favors from her as she's seen happen on the streets and he says and thinks "she's not remotely my type" though of course they end up together and she's the most beautiful thing ever.

Off the top of your head I'm guessing you can't tell me 5 books where the endgame couple starts the book already in love or romantically interested in one another. So why would Az and Gwyn not being true friends yet be a problem at all?

As far as Gwyn's interest or lack thereof, I don't even need the bonus but if after 2 years and knowing what Elain did during the war he still doesn't think she's capable of handling the darkness of the trove but after a few months he believes in Gwyn's ability to make it through the Rite, it's pretty obvious who the author is setting up as his love interest. Sarah's writing and preferred behavior for her MMC with his endgame person is not difficult to spot at this point.

While we don't currently have confirmation of physical attraction (something that could easily change with a simple change of pov), we do have confirmation of curiousity on Gwyn's part. And a lot of admiration on Az's side.

How is that not a wonderful jumping off point for these two characters? Az is no stranger to lust for beautiful females but he doesn't often give them credit for standing on their own two feet. And Gwyn's curiousity about Az, a male, after what happened to her, is a huge step forward already.

Gwyn started SF not having left the library in 2 years but by the end she was fine being alone with Az on the top of the roof in the middle of the night. She was teasing him over his title, "Shadowsinger."

I'm not sure how you don't see that as being playful / flirtatious. Does that mean she's in love with Az and wants to jump his bones? No, it's just the first hints we're seeing. I'd rather only see hints of something before two characters are ready to bang one out on page before they've even had a POV and shared any sort of meaningful conversation (which Az and Elain have never done, they have never spoken about anything of true importance). That's the difference between a romance book with sex and a book with smut.

As for Az, I'd much rather wait for his romance to build on page, where he's only focused on one female, rather than the shit-show that has been the Mor / Elain situation. Where he can't even admit to his best friend that he's over Mor in the same chapter he thinks how he's not thought of a plan on how to be with Elain beyond his sexual fantasies.

Elain deserves a hell of a lot better than that. And so does Gwyn. Which is why I'm glad Az isn't romantically interested in her at this point in time. Have you ever liked a guy who was panting over you and another girl? It's really not the romance E/riels like to pretend it is and I'd rather Az truly come to terms with his past with Mor and letting her go (something that he has not fully done) before he shows any romantic interest for his endgame person. But with Gwynriel I see that future potential. The banter already exists, she's a bit bloodthirsty like Az, she's seen him slaughter which means she's seen a little what Az is capable of versus how he's behaved around Elain, and his shadows are happy around her (which is better than how Az notes they tend to vanish around Elain after telling us how they're his companions). Not to mention Az won't suffer being around someone who already has a mate and will forever have that mate.

Crying fanservice because you don't get your way rather than paying attention to the author you're reading is a copout and I hope you respect Sarah's writing more than that.

[sanscat0414]

Misunderstanding?!

Hawks x reader:

Synopsis: Hawks gets suspicious of you because you have been coming home later and your spend less time with him. He begins to suspect you of cheating but little did he know it was…

————————————————————————

Hawks have been noticing that you came from work later for the past month. Usually he tried to aim to get home by 10:30 or before midnight. Whenever he was home earlier he noticed you were not home which is strange as you always came home before 10 even in days you work overtime. You were almost always on your phone typing away texting someone. You would even laugh a couple of times when texted this mysterious person. What’s even more suspicious is when he asked you about it you just brush it off.

“Hm? Oh it’s nothing. It’s just some family stuff.”

Or

“Huh? It’s 11? I didn’t realize I was out so late. Why? Mmm? Just lost track.”

Or

“What do you mean? I��m just texted a friend.”

Now he trusted you so he let it be. He believed you but still he couldn’t help but feel a little hurt. You weren’t spending as much time as you used to with him. You spend majority of your precious time you had with him on checking on the phone when your not you seem distant. Like you were thinking of something else.

Last week, was even more weird to Hawks. He was lucky to have gotten out of work early that day and wanted to pick you up. Only to find you hanging out with another man. Sure he saw you from a far but you were laughing with the man. He just left thinking it was your friend or something but you never mentioned him before. All this combined the extra time gone, the texts, the times you were distant hawks started thinking you were cheating on him. Hawks gave the benefit of the doubt but his trust in you was waning.

The final straw was today. It was a long a waited day off for him. He wanted to spend it with you but when he asked if you wanted to spend time with him you said

“I’m sorry Keigo I can’t. I know it’s your day off and we haven’t spend much time together. I just have something to do.”

That “something” was hanging with that same man. He wanted to get some KFC for the both of you and by coincidence spotted you. Naturally he was furious and sad that you had chosen another man over him. He decided to wait for you to come home before confronting you.

When you finally got home, you could tell something was wrong. The atmosphere was as thick as butter and an Erie silence cause by the lack of “Baby bird your home!”

“Keigo? I’m home.” You said.

“I’m in the living room.” He said almost coldly.

“Baby?” You said as you walked in to the Living room only to see Hawks sitting there in a serious manner.

There was no funny business and hawks had a no emotion in his face. He just sat there watching you like a predator watching its prey. It unsettled you.

“ Sit, we need to talk,_____.” He said as he gestured to the other couch infront of him.

Now you know it’s serious. He never uses your name unless it’s serious, like taking about your safety or something.

“Is something wrong?” You asked confuse and nervous as you sat down.

“Be honest with me. Are you cheating on me?”

“What? Why would you think that?” You said with genuine confusion shown on your face.

“I mean you spend extra time away from home after work, those texts that you laugh at, and that man that you were hangout with. I saw you today! With him. You rather choose to be with him than me! If so just say so.”

You stared at him at disbelief, now to be fair when he laird it all out like that it make sence but you could help but think thsi situation was a bit ridiculous. After a few seconds you laughed.

“What’s so funny?”

“It’s not what- you know what that’s to cliche. Let me try agian.” You said as you tried to stop laughing.

“Kei, first of all of course I’m not cheating on you. I love you with everything I have. I’m sorry I haven’t been spending as much time with you or paying attention to you. It’s just this month has been a bit hectic.” You said and you moved next to him.

You gave him a small kiss on the forehead and show him a picture. “Is this the man you saw?”

He nodded and you explained “that’s my sister’s boyfriend. He’s been asking me alll about what my sister likes. And what do for a proposal to her. I was helping him do a little shopping for the proposal plan. If I had known earlier that you had a day off today I wouldn’t have planed our outing today. He’s been planing it for months and kept changing the day he pop the question. I kept pushing him.”

Hawks looked at you dumb founded “Why didn’t you tell me.”

“It’s a secret that I have been helping him. Plus he wanted to forge his own ring for her, and I had a friend who does metal smithing. I been going to that. friend with him.”

“Why would you need to?”

You got up to go get something form your room. You came back with a small box and you handed it him. He open it and saw a beautiful metal feather with a gem on the stem of the feather. The feather was a little wanky but it was cute. It was attached to a leather string necklace.

“I took the opportunity to try to make something for you too. It was supposed to be a surprise for our anniversary but I wasn’t able to get it just right on time. I guess better late than never right.”

Hawks started it for a good 5 minutes in silence. It was beautiful and you made this by yourself (with help but still.) once he was finally done admiring it he hugged you. He warped his wings around you tight and nuzzled into your neck.

“I’m sorry for jumping to conclusions …. I love it thank you.”

“No no I should have said something sooner. I should have payed more attention I’m sorry too. I should have been more clear.”

That nught you guys cuddled for a bit. When your sister boyfriend called Hawks answered. He mildly scolded him for “stealing” his girlfriend and gave him some advice on being confidenace. Needless to say your sister said yes and you and hawks was invited to see them.

Hawks met your sister’s now husband on their wedding day. He apologized to Hawks after learning of what happened. Natural your just glad everything went well, and you where grateful that you and hawks were always upfront when it come to communication. Occasionally there will me moments when you suck at communicating but it all works out.

[luveline]

Hey jade!!!! I love your work ❤️❤️. I was wondering if you would do more of the kisses before dinner au? Maybe just some fluff of Steve and r taking care of the new baby?? Or anything you want with them—I just love that au so much. Thanks!!!

dad!steve and mom!reader finding a balance with the new baby<3 thank you for your request!

Steve Harrington was meant to be a dad. He’s wanted to have kids since he was young, twenty and broken-hearted thinking up futures he worried he might never have. And then he met you, and all too soon (somehow not soon enough) you were having his baby, and now he’s here. 

He can’t believe it. 

The baby sleeps in his arms. She’s three weeks old, so so small, and she looks a lot like you, in his opinion. You’d laughed fondly and exhausted into his shoulder when he told you his theory a couple of minutes ago, saying, Babies look like babies, Steve. 

Still, Steve looks at her and he can’t help hoping she’ll have your eyes, your nose, your big pretty smile. 

You’re dozing with your head propped against his shoulder, drooling down his arm. Avery’s in your lap, and she doesn’t seem disappointed that you’ve fallen asleep. Steve worried she might be, because with the new baby finally here and home, Avery’s not getting nearly as much attention as she should. Steve feels guilty but he knows everything will be back to normal soon. You can only do what you can. 

“What do you think, Ave?” he asks quietly. “She look like your mom?”

“I hope she looks like you so she looks like me,” Avery says. 

“But what about Bethie?” Steve asks. Avery is the oldest, Bethie her junior. 

“What about Beth?”

“If you look like me, and Dove looks like me,” —Dove, the former youngest, your two year old— “and then the baby looks like me, only Beth looks like your mom.”

“What’s wrong with that?”

“Nothing,” he says genuinely. 

Steve never thought he was ugly, but seeing his face on someone else’s, seeing the brown of his eyes staring back at him through Avery’s gaze, it gave him an appreciation for his features that he never had before. But… you’re beautiful. The love of his life, before and after his children. He thinks it’s only fair that these sweethearts you made near enough by yourself would carry you with them in more than their actions. It’s the reason he finds himself so sweet on Bethie. (All his girls are gorgeous and loved, of course, but he looks at Beth and he sees you every now and then. He catches you in her unassuming smiles and hears you in her laugh and he can’t help it, he leans over to give her hair a good stroke.) 

But again, if the baby looks like Steve, it won’t matter. In the same way it didn’t matter that she was another girl. She’ll be just as loved as the rest of them, no matter what. She already is. 

Like she knows she’s being talked about, the baby coughs in his arms. Steve’s a pro at babies now, truly, he knows all the steps. He’s a great dad. And still his heart stops when he’s reminded of how new she is, how fragile.

How strong, too. Her little leg twitches against his chest. Steve beams down at her, relieved when she stays sleeping.

“Did you and mom pick a name yet?” Avery whispers. 

“Why? Do you have any ideas?” Steve asks back. 

“I don’t know.”

Steve tries to pour as much of his love and pride for her into his expression as he can. “Come on, Avery, tell me. I can’t promise we’ll choose one, but I wanna hear your ideas. What names do you like?”

“I liked Heather,” she says. That was one Steve suggested. You’d been unsure. 

“Yeah?”

“And Tiffany, too. We’d be Ave, Beth, Dove and Tiff.”

“You’d sound like a TV show,” Steve laughs. 

Avery giggles. “Okay, what about Sarah? Or Jessica?”

“I know too many Jessica’s,” Steve says, “but Sarah’s really nice.” 

Steve doesn’t know what you’ll choose. Three weeks is the longest one of his girls has gone without a name, because this time you just can’t pick. Avery had a name before she was born, and you got one look at Dove and knew, but Bethie hadn’t been so easy, and now this new baby is following suit. 

“Dad?”

“What?”

“She’s awake.”

Steve looks down, perplexed, and finds Avery’s right. The baby is awake in his arms, unmoving beside her slow sticky blinks. 

“Some babies don’t open their eyes for weeks,” Steve tells Avery. 

“Did I open mine?”

He nods. “You did.”

You rouse against Steve’s shoulder like you can tell the baby is alert. Maybe you can. You sit up with a little moan that makes his heartbreak in half for you, and your hand shoots to your hips. You’ve had a lot of pelvis pain, and some additional soreness where expected. 

“You okay?” he asks. 

You barely hear him, love and tenderness in every line and pore of your face. “My baby,” you say, with more emotions in your voice than there are words to describe. “Look, she’s looking at you.”

You pull Avery into your chest and she melts at the affection. She must be missing you more than she’ll say. You notice as Steve notices, tearing your gaze from the newborn against his chest to dot kisses in a bow over her forehead. “My first baby,” you say, delighted. “Sorry for falling asleep. Tell me about your day, honey, I promise I won’t fall asleep again.”

The baby starts crying eventually, and Avery’s face falls. You’re torn, Steve can tell, but you look at him with a smile that says, You have it, right?

Of course he does. Parenting is a balance you struck with one another a long time ago. He takes the baby into the kitchen to heat up a bottle of milk, and listens to you and Avery talking in the living room, hand pat pat patting the baby’s back. 

“Hi, daddy.”

Steve pauses. He holds the baby tight to his chest, before bending down to look under the kitchen table. 

“Oh, there my girls are. I thought you were upstairs watching Princess Polly.”

Dove and Bethie are under the table with a pack of crayons and a huge pad of paper. There’s paper scraps everywhere, and they couldn’t look happier in their mismatched pyjamas. Bethie’s the one who’d spoken, and she’s looking at him like he hung the moon.

Dove holds up her drawing. “Look!” she says. 

“I’m looking!” he promises. “Woah! So pretty!”

Bethie won’t show hers. “Mine’s for mommy.”

“I see. Sure I can’t have a little sneak peek?”

She shakes her head. Steve kneels down on the floor so he can watch them drawing, the baby against his chest, bottle held to her mouth. He stays there as the baby falls asleep and is overjoyed by the sound of wax on paper, Dove’s happy babbling, and your laughter echoing in from the living room. 

“Aw, baby,” you’re saying, like Avery’s told you something silly, “I love you.” 

Steve doesn’t know who he’s trying to say it to, but he mouths it after you anyhow. I love you. All his girls. 

The baby hiccups. 

Steve thinks it might be her first love you too. 

—

more of this universe <3 please consider reblogging if you enjoyed<3

[alexturne]

I'm having a lot of thoughts and idk if I've fully thought it all out, but I needed to get it down and try to work out how I feel about it all..

I genuinely don't think this whole "discourse" is what's happening. I'm sure they just really wanted to do the whole bit with the strings and that's all.

Nothing to do with Alex and Miles being less close than they once were. Nothing to do with their relationship being less profound than it has always been. They're super important people in each other's lives and there comes a point when you've been that for someone for so long that it no longer requires constant reconfirmation. Their friendship is so solid, so deeply rooted within them both, that they don't need to perform together to assure themselves that they're good. There's no question. They're friends, and they always will be, no matter how much time passes, they'll always be there for each other. I have no doubt about that.

And they asked Miles to come along, they knew they could count on him to make it and do an amazing show, even on short notice. And Miles was there watching, having fun, riding the high of his own show, and I bet it doesn't hurt him the slightest bit not playing 505 with them. And neither does Alex not joining him for a tlsp track. And it's just very fun to watch Miles do such a great job on such a massive stage and to watch Alex (maybe) send some inside jokes his way, and definitely acknowledge his presence more than he has for any other opening act.

Miles has enjoyed playing a couple of the more Miles centric tlsp tunes during the last year at his own shows, and he probably just took them off the setlist when they figured out they wouldn't have the time/energy to rehearse and work it all out. And to not lead anyone on and create false hope that Alex might show up. It's been a long time since they've done it. And Alex is the sort of guy who has probably forgotten his own lyrics, and would require more time and brain capacity to practice to get it in order. Or something else that is perfectly reasonable.

Like, I'm all for delusions but I guess I'm just saying that I don't think it's that deep. They're friends. Close friends. Very important to each other. (Maybe more if that's how you choose to view it). And I bet they don't even think about the shows in the same terms as we do, every little thing doesn't matter as much to them as it does to us. Not everything is a "sign" and there are so many pragmatic and logistical reasons that play into a tour like this that we know nothing about.

I bet Alex is exhausted, excited for the tour to be over and to get to go home and rest, I know I would be! Even if he has loved every bit of it, I would be completely worn out and just ready to go home. But I bet they were also so excited to have the strings and they wanted to really have them shine during the set. It was their show. The Monkey's show, and they finally had the chance to let the vision they had for the album come to life. What an amazing end of the tour.

I won't get too much into why they haven't utilized the strings sooner, because they obviously could've and I don't get why they didn't, and maybe they could've skipped the strings on 505 and had Miles up for it instead. It would've been incredible. So much potential. A lot of fans would've been pleased bout that, and I know they'd enjoy it and have fun playing together too.

But they didn't, and even if I would love to know the actual reason, I'm choosing to let it go and assume there is a very logical and reasonable explanation, and not some big dramatic fallout going on. I can be disappointed about not seeing them, but I don't think it "means" anything in the grander scheme of things.

Miles could've played with them (assuming he doesn't for the last one either), and I won't get into that discussion too much either, because ofc they could have done it together, but so many things had to work out and maybe Miles just wanted to do his own thing. Maybe they never got around to having the conversation, maybe something entirely different happened. We don't know.

And yes ofc I'm disappointed that we didn't get to see them together, I won't deny it. I would've loved it, both as a fan of their music and performances and as a tiny little happy milex lover, my shipper and fic writer heart would've been so so pleased about it. But we didn't get it this time around, and that doesn't mean that their friendship is over or that they hate each other or that they're not close anymore or that they don't love each other anymore. And it doesn't mean that we won't ever see them play together again.

I think they would love to perform together again, but I would assume they also have so many other things they love to do too. So many other things that require their energy. Even together, but also just their personal dreams and wants in life.

They're both into the idea of tlsp being back someday, but as it has always been with them, tlsp will return when the time is right, when it happens naturally. That's the beauty of it. It's something that just happens and that's why they both love and enjoy it so much, I think. It's about freedom and spontaneity, it's without boundaries, it can't be planned or controlled, it's a beautiful chaos between two close friends who love to make music together, and who are incredibly talented at it. But they're also artists who have other ambitions. Other projects they love.

And their friendship doesn't depend on tlsp releasing new music. It is a product of their beautiful friendship, but the friendship came first. Them not writing together right now actually says absolutely nothing about the current state of their friendship. Which we have seen signs of being as healthy and strong as ever, if a bit more private than it used to be. And that's fine. They're super private people, and honestly I would have much more reason to worry for their friendship if they suddenly started posting about it all the time and parading each other around. They're not like that and they never will be and that's fine.

Anyway, back to the topic at hand.

Yes, they're being dumbasses - both the band and our dear milex boys, throughout the whole tour - with not utilizing the strings earlier on the tour, not playing more of The Car on the setlist, not skipping more of AM, not taking advantage of ALL THAT POTENTIAL. They could've done the strings for Glastonbury, it would've been perfect. They could've easily included Miles in a few more gigs (it was sooooo lovely when they did), these last ones in particular, and it would've been so beautiful and meaningful and they would've had so much fun with it - they could've made so many better decisions than they did. The whole tour came with some question marks. We can all agree on that. They're being stupid and they seem to not always think very far ahead, and sometimes forget to use their brains, and I assume that's why they end up not having time to rehearse and work things out sooner, and that is honestly just so dumb of them. They could be doing so much more and I hope some things will improve next time.

But either way - the tour is over and I've loved every second of it.

The new album is super gorgeous and it finally got the string section it deserved. What an amazing finish to the tour. I sincerely hope they will be bringing a lot of The Car back next time around.

Deeply in my own heart I wish we would see Alex and Miles on stage together again soon, but at the same time, I wish Miles the very best with his own work, he truly deserves all the success in the world. And I hope Alex will get some well-earned rest and time off. I hope he will go free of paparazzi and find peace and quiet after this insanely taxing year, and I hope he finds bunches and bunches of inspiration for new songs. I hope tlsp will be back sooner rather than later and I hope they're happy.

I've loved getting to follow the tour, I've loved being on here freaking out with you guys, and I will miss getting to see their little faces everyday. Truly.

But I think it's so well deserved for them to take a break and I hope they will be back soon.

[holymolyineedtherapy]

Would the Straw Hats be Swifities?

(I'm watching the Eras Tour movie rn and I got to thinking about it)

Luffy

No but not because he doesn't like her but because he doesn't know who she is. He would like a couple of her songs once he was introduced but I don't think he would consider himself a swiftie because he is a captain and a strawhat pirate, nothing else.

Zoro

Kinda the same as Luffy. No because he doesn't know who she is but he doesn't care for her music. There's maybe one or two songs he genuinely enjoys but he never listens to them unless someone else plays them.

Nami

Not at first because she used to be a hater but then she listened to the not so popular songs and fell in love with them. She's a secret swiftie in which she won't tell anyone she loves her music. Her favorite album is Reputation

Usopp

Of course he is a huge swiftie. He became a swiftie during the 1989 era when she became a pop icon. Ever since then he was hooked, especially when evermore came out, which is his favorite album.

Sanji

We all know the answer to this, of course he is. He has been a swiftie since 2006 when debut dropped. He knows all the chants and album lore. Lover is his favorite album and he will kick anyone who says it's the worst album and ME! is the worst song.

Chopper

Yes of course he is if you disagree you did not watch One Piece Film Red. He mainly admired her at first for her tenacity but it grew into a love for her and her music when she released Speak Now, which is his favorite album.

Robin

No. She admires her hard work and lyricism but that's about it. Until Folklore comes out. She doesn't consider herself a swiftie but there are a couple of songs (*cough cough* this is me trying and my tears ricochet *cough cough*) that she truly loves. (*cough cough* and yoyok when midnights releases *cough cough*)

Franky

He considers himself one but he's like a dad swiftie. He knows her popular songs and that's about it. He tries to keep up with the lore talk but he just gets so confused. His favorite album is 1989.

Brook

Is this even a question? Yes. Of course he is. Obviously once he hears her music after being trapped for 50 years. He overhears Usopp and Sanji talking about her and from that moment he was hooked. His favorite album is Speak Now because it's entirely self written.

Jinbei

No but just because he doesn't know her. He's like another dad swiftie but the type that doesn't consider himself a swiftie but if you play Shake It Off he will jam out to it.

-honorary straw hats-

Vivi

Yes yes yes, she is a huge swifite. She keeps up with all the lore and Easter eggs. It's her guilty pleasure as a princess give her a break. Her favorite albums are Folklore and Fearless.

Bon Clay

Again, is this even a question? 100 times yes he is the biggest swiftie of all. He collects all the merch. He fights in the trenches for the tickets. He pre orders all the cds and vinyls. Don't ask him to choose a favorite album because he cannot (although You Need To Calm Down is his favorite song ofc)

[itsjaywalkers]

hi hi! since you blessed us with some nothing happens headcanons would you maybe be able to give us some possessive insane nothing happens james headcanons too? i’m so obsessed with him

hi darling!! and yes, ofc i can!! i feel a lil repetitive bc . u guys already are more than aware of how unhinged he is but . here we go

there have been a few instances of . boys trying to bully reg or be mean to him bc he's, objectively, a bit of a freak. kinda has some unsettling vibes, and he's . very shy very quiet . but this never really turned into anything bc james always found out (thanks to evan) and then cornered the little shits and threatened them. one time he even actually kicked their asses a lil. reg doesn't know about this

james checks reg's social media accs semi-regularly. and i mean, he uses reg's password to get into his accs and check . chats or comments and shit like that . not so much when they're young but after reg starts dating yk

he physically fights two of reg's bfs, and the other one he comes close to, but others hold him back before he can get far

when they go out clubbing, james never loses sight of reg, not even when he's in the mood to flirt or get laid, and the second he sees someone asking to buy reg a drink or getting a lil too close, he interrupts and gets super touchy, straight up says he's reg's bf if the guy is too insistent

offers to drive reg absolutely everywhere as soon as he gets his license

actually gets mad when pandora or evan or even sirius know something about reg that he doesn't, and makes reg feel guilty for not telling him/not telling him first

already mentioned this one but . one of the times he's fucking reg he forces him to call his current bf and keep a conversation with him while he's litelly . inside him . fucking him into the mattress

covers reg in hickeys when they make out or fool around and gets all pouty if reg decides to cover them up afterwards

calls reg or comes up with fake emergencies or excuses to text reg when he knows he's out on a date or hanging out with his current bf

coaxes reg into sleeping with him the first time while he's still with barty even tho reg is . a bit reluctant at the beginning bc he really doesn't want to cheat on barty since they're friends. with his other bfs, reg's the one who initiates the cheating quite often, but james had to . do some convincing the first time they had sex simply bc reg was with barty

barty finds out about the cheating bc james can't keep his fucking mouth shut and can't stand barty saying that reg is his etc etc

genuinely can't go more than a couple of days without seeing reg

when he knows reg is interested in someone, or finds someone pretty, he always finds something wrong with them and talks reg into not giving them a chance (this doesn't always work ofc, since reg ends up having 3 bfs before he and james get together)

even after shit hits the fan, james can't keep his distance from reg (although it's definitely what they both need after what happens)

he chooses reg over pretty much everyone else in his life

he's so fucking insane about him that even tho there was a brief time when he was interested in lily and lily was also interested in him . she decided to reject him bc she did NOT want to be involved in what was bound to be an absolute trainwreck of a relationship. james doesn't find out about this until a few years later, when lily confirms what she already suspected back then

and that's enough for now i think !!

[snowyh2o]

Every Demon’s Rainbow AU

@redactedtimes

Oh 100000% she’d be horrified. Part of Charlie’s goal and reasoning with the hotel is that redemption should be a choice for the residents, not something that’s forced upon them. And (here’s where I get to talk about world building lol) it’s worse in this AU because the reason the Hotel’s got this influence is due to Charlie herself!

The Hotel’s Redemption Be Upon Thee! Powers come from Charlie’s own deep seated belief that there’s genuine good inside of every demon (hence the name Every Demon’s Rainbow). In this AU, she and Vaggie have been living inside the rundown hotel and working on her redemption plan for a couple of years now. And Charlie’s reality altering magic ends up seeped into every creak and crevice of the hotel. And since this is Charlie’s magic, and also because she isn’t consciously using it to cast a spell, the magic ends up taking a life of its own and latches onto Charlie’s greatest belief/desire. Which would be that every demon is capable of redemption and change and Charlie wants to create a place that can give those demons the opportunity to do so. (The end goal being that redemption means there would be no need for the yearly exterminations or at the very least the ones who ascend to heaven will be safe).

What the hotel actually does is bring out or amplifies the best/good traits in the souls who stay there for an extended period of time. Makes it easier for demons to choose to do good things— suppresses the hang ups someone might have for saying sorry, for example. Nothing the hotel makes people think or do are things that they haven’t thought about doing before. If I had to describe it, it’s like an enabler, but for good or more positive actions/thoughts/traits? And creates an atmosphere/environment that would make said souls more likely to act on their good/positive thoughts.

The effect is actually really subtle (and different for every resident), which is why no one else notices it aside from feeling more at ease and generally happier while staying at the hotel. Which can be explained away as just the hotel being a genuine relief to go back to compared to the rest of hell. And that the people there are also much more pleasant to be around, something that Charlie actively works to cultivate.

Alastor’s just a little bitch stupidly in tune with himself and who he is and when his thoughts and actions are his own that he notices the effect the hotel has (so he gets to deal with intrusive positive thoughts :P). And that’s not until he’s stayed at the hotel for a while (Still working on the timeline). But because he knows himself so well, and also because he’s arguably the worst of the people who’s staying at the hotel/has the most baggage and issues that he actively represses, he feels the Hotel’s magic affecting him all the more keenly. And it grates at him that this is now another part of his life he’s slowly losing control over, and it’s not even because he wouldn’t consider improving the quality of Husk’s bribe booze or put together something to celebrate the hotel’s (minimal) success— but that he’s actively considering it at all that makes him recoil and actively fight against/reject it. Especially when a big part of Alastor’s self image is the reputation he’s crafted for himself, the persona of the Radio Demon, a charming but cold heartless murderer who’s only ever out for himself and couldn’t care less about the people around him aside from the mild entertainment they could bring. Everyone knows who the Radio Demon is. Everyone is scared of the Radio Demon. (Even the Radio Demon’s friends are never sure of when he’ll turn on them <- complete lie that he likes to believe in, all his friends will say he’s actually quite pleasant to be around) He can’t have people thinking, seeing, the Radio Demon has a soft side. That he could care about people, that he is, at the end of the day, just another human soul stuck in hell.

This, however, is also why he’ll never on the threat of death tell Charlie about the Hotel’s magic. Because it’s a weakness and he’ll be damned if he ever reveals something as vulnerable as that about himself. So he just, deals with it as best he can.

If Charlie ever does find out about her inadvertent magical hotel, it’d probably be through Lucifer. And either only after they’ve rebuilt the new hotel, or right after Lucifer’s visit to the hotel. Which would be a whole thing that ends with the two of them undoing the spell on the hotel. And, if I ever get into after finale AU speculation, the new hotel also won’t have any magical compulsions tied to it— not that Alastor would know lol.

[becauseimanicequeen]

In Defense of Ji from To Be Continued

(Or “Let’s Look at Characters From a More Non-Binary Perspective”)

I’ve been thinking about writing a post like this since the 5th episode last week (but haven’t gotten around to it). But after reading a couple of comments with the general consensus that Ji’s actions were at the risk of becoming irredeemable, I felt like there was no time like the present. Better late than never, right? (This is a long one, so I’ll put most of it after a break with a TL;DR at the end.)

(Btw, that purple light between them is so well placed. They're clearly not communicating, symbolized by that line being drawn between them. And the purple, a mix of blue (trust and loyalty) and red (love and fate), symbolizes the mysterious and unresolved feelings they're both having (or are beginning to have) towards each other. )

The response to Ji and Achi that I’ve seen has been interesting. The little response I’ve seen (since I haven’t seen this series being talked about that much, or perhaps I’m just bad at searching for it) was utter annoyance with Achi the first few episodes until we were shown that Ji made Achi cry in the past and (mostly) everyone I’ve seen writing about this turned on Ji all of a sudden.

(It’s hilarious to see how easily viewers change their opinions. I mean that genuinely. Some of that is more entertaining than many QLs I’ve watched.)

My mindset isn’t that binary, though. (I don’t see things in either black or white because that’s too limiting for me.) That means that I’m neither for nor against either Achi or Ji. (I can definitely like one character more than another, but that doesn’t mean that character is “better” than any other. And in this particular case, I like Ji and Achi equally.) It just annoys me a bit when a character gets torn to shreds for an isolated scene or situation (akin to the whole Non vs Jin situation in DFF, which got waaaaay out of hand).

(Obviously, this is by no means a call for deep analysis of characters–essay style–every time anyone wants to say something about a character. But I do feel like taking an isolated situation out of context means that the meaning, however differently all of us interpret that meaning, gets lost.)

Based on what we’ve seen so far in To Be Continued, both Achi and Ji have made mistakes (in the past and present), they are both terrible at communicating, both are clearly confused and/or terrified of their feelings (especially towards each other), and it seems like no one wants to be the first to fess up. That’s the general situation of their relationship in the series so far.

A discussion on who’s at “fault” for Ji and Achi’s current situation based on what I just listed is pretty much unnecessary because they’re both equally responsible. However, since it’s so easy to play the blame game and spread it like wildfire on the internet just because there’s a character one doesn’t like or see eye to eye with, I thought it was a good idea to include it in this post anyway. Especially since my answer is based on my non-binary way of thinking. (Spoiler alert: it’s not either/or, it’s both/and.)

(I’m putting fault between quotation marks because I feel like its connotation is too negative when something like responsible would suit better. But since fault is often thrown around when playing the blame game, I’ll stick to that word.)

If we look at Ji and Achi’s actions (the ones we’ve seen so far), I feel like 3 moments stand out:

Achi pestering Ji in the first few episodes even though Ji said he wanted nothing to do with Achi. (Present)

Ji asked Achi to introduce him to Pear. (Past)

The mixed signals both of them are giving each other. (Past and present)

I’ve previously written a post about Achi choosing not to respect Ji’s boundaries (even when clearly stated), so I won’t go too deep into that. What I will mention here, however, is that it doesn’t matter how desperate Achi is in trying to keep Ji close. Breaking someone else’s boundaries is not okay. Whenever someone needs space, it should (ideally) be respected.

Achi is being way too pushy in the first couple of episodes, and he’s not even communicating why that is. I think he says once (or twice?) that he’s missed Ji all these 10 years they’ve been apart and that he wants to know how Ji's been, but that’s no excuse.

If you doubt that some space would make any difference, look at how Ji reacted during that whole montage of Ji finding those bags with food (or whatever it was) that Achi hung on his door in ep. 5. And those notes they write to each other when exchanging those bags is probably the best line of communication they’ve had since they got to know each other. That’s how much can change if a person’s boundaries are respected.

(Sure, you could argue that it was a result of Ji showing respect first when he thanked Achi for coming over with food in the scene before the montage. Sometimes you need to first give what you want to get, and that “thank you” to Achi might've made Achi realize he could back off without being terrified of losing Ji (or whatever his reason for being so persistent is).)

When it comes to my second point above (Ji asking Achi to introduce him to Pear), it’s very interwoven with the third point (the mixed signals both of them are giving).

In the whole montage of them going on that day trip and playing games and stuff in the past (ep. 3), you can clearly see that there are feelings involved from both of them (whatever that may be; friendship, fondness, curiosity, love, whatever). But every time Ji looked at Achi (especially when they were at one of those lookout points with a beautiful view), Achi turned away. I mean, if you look at that whole jacket scene, you can see that he literally steps back and avoids Ji’s gaze.

Ji doesn’t seem to mind though, it’s not like he’s surprised or worried about it. But it still doesn’t change the fact that Achi is giving him mixed signals. Achi is both hot (giving Ji his jacket when Ji’s cold) and cold (stepping away and avoiding Ji’s gaze when Ji is looking and smiling at him).

And then there’s the scene on the pier/jetty at the end of episode 4 (which is also from the past). This happens after Ji asked Achi to introduce him to Pear (which I still believe was very innocent at first because Ji seemed genuinely interested in her, and there’s nothing wrong with that).

On that pier/jetty, Ji is tentatively trying to figure out how Achi is feeling because he can sense the tension (at least that’s how I interpret it). Ji does so by first asking Achi if he has feelings for Pear (because that could be a logical explanation for the tension), but Achi says he doesn’t. That’s when Ji has this look on his face:

It’s like he’s trying to think of another reason for the tension, which I think is what leads to the moment when he says that Achi’s got pretty eyes, nose, and lips.

I feel like he’s being genuine here. At the same time as he’s trying to figure out what the tension is all about, he’s also giving Achi an opportunity to clear things up, to be honest with Ji, and for both of them to get closer.

Then Ji lays his head on Achi’s chest as if to listen to his heartbeat (perhaps listening for an answer rather than being told, because we already know that their m.o. isn’t communication).

Achi is swayed for a moment, but he still chooses to change the subject and ends up leaving the pier/jetty (once again giving Ji mixed signals, especially after looking at Ji with heart eyes only moments before).

Achi’s reaction is probably based on a fear of being rejected since he thinks that Ji is interested in Pear, so it makes sense. But, even though his actions make sense, he’s still choosing to participate in giving off mixed signals.

(I mean, if someone looked at me with hearts in their eyes and then avoided me like the plague when I wanted to get closer, I would ditch the bitch. But, this isn’t about me…)

What’s interesting (and something I think some viewers are forgetting) is that this scene from the past is mirrored in the scene in Ji’s bedroom earlier in the same episode (which is in the present). In the present, it’s Achi who says that he thinks Ji’s eyes, nose, and lips are pretty (confessing to Ji only when he thinks Ji is sleeping, which seems to be his m.o., btw).

But then he repeats it when Ji asks him what he said.

I feel like Achi is trying to bring back that moment from the past because he knows he missed an opportunity to be honest about his feelings at that moment on the pier/jetty. The difference is that this time it leads to them kissing (a kiss that should never have happened until they had cleared up their shit, btw, but who can stop these two confused, love-sick, adorable idiots? Well, the screenwriters can, but what would be the fun in that? I digress…).

This time, Ji is the one who breaks the moment. He knows just as well as Achi where those words came from. He remembers that moment on the pier/jetty in the past just as well as Achi. And I swear that he remembers the rejection too.

It’s possible those memories were too much for Ji. It’s also possible that he realized the kiss wasn’t a good idea (he has shown previously that he’s not okay with Achi just kissing him, like in ep. 2). And as we saw with the previous kiss, it takes Ji a moment or two before he realizes what happens an/or realizes the implications of what’s happening (it took him a moment before he pushed Achi away in ep. 2, and the same here in ep. 4 before he pulled back).

So, who’s at “fault” here? Who’s at “fault” for creating more tension (and hurt feelings) between them?

Is Achi at “fault” considering he brought up the past when mirroring that moment on the pier/jetty? Is he at “fault” considering he initiated the kiss in Ji's bedroom (he was the one who leaned forward first and the one who held onto Ji with both hands/arms)?

Is Ji at “fault” considering he rejected Achi? Is he at “fault” considering he told Achi to leave his bedroom after the kiss (clearly needing some space)?

And don’t come at me with the whole “but Ji hurt Achi’s feelings by hitting on Pear, not to mention taking her to the same movie that Achi took Ji to.”

First of all, was that a conscious choice of Ji’s? Possibly. Was this the best way to go about it? Debatable. But it should be said that Ji got interested in Pear before he started sensing the tension between him and Achi. It was all good feelings before that (and it could be that Ji didn’t think his relationship with Achi was beyond friendship, because delusion and confusion are every teenager’s middle names).

Secondly, on that same pier/jetty in that same scene in ep. 4, Ji mentions that he doesn’t like romantic movies, whereas Achi says that it might be because he’s never been in love. Is it then so far-fetched that he takes Pear to that same movie (which I assume is a romance) to test out if he sees the movie with new eyes now that he’s with Pear? Not really.

(Could he have chosen another romantic movie? Sure. Was there another romance playing at the time? I have no fucking idea because this is fiction and they didn’t tell us and we’re probably supposed to read between the lines that it was a romance and that Ji was influenced by Achi’s words and I’m totally getting off track here…)

Thirdly, and probably the most important point: Let’s not forget that there’s actually a possibility that Ji is bi (the same goes for Achi who had some sort of relationship with… what’s her name, Mona?).

I know it’s difficult in this generally binary-thinking world to understand there’s a possibility of something in the middle of black or white. You’re either gay or straight, right? Wrong! There’s such a thing as bi- and pansexuality. And since we’re living in such a binary-thinking world, it’s easy to be hella confused as bi- or pansexual.

(I won’t go into the bi-hate that viewers spew out in comments and reactions to QLs, especially when the lead roles are bi (and especially when they are together with or hook up with the opposite sex), but it’s so fucking annoying. I want to write a post about this one day, or reblog someone else's post who might’ve written about it better than I ever will, so if anyone knows a post on this, send it my way.)

If Ji is a bi character, can you blame him for being confused? If he’s not bi but is having his gay awakening, can you blame him for being confused?

Can you blame him for asking Achi to introduce him to Pear, especially since Achi has never expressed his romantic interest in Ji and Ji seems genuinely interested in Pear? Can you really blame Ji for trying to figure out what the fuck is going on with Achi when he notices the tension between them?

Can you really blame Ji for not being able to read between the lines (has anyone forgotten he’s a teenager?)?

And I’m not saying all this to say that it’s Achi’s “fault” either. He’s just as confused as Ji. And none of them are brave enough to take the first step to clear things up either.

Again, it’s both Ji and Achi’s “fault” that things are the way they are. They are both responsible for their situation.

There’s still much to be revealed in this series, so a lot of it is still up for speculation right now. Clearly, however, something happened that made them go their separate ways and be out of contact with each other for 10 years.

If I were to put my money on a bet, it would be that they split because of a misunderstanding on both their parts. What that misunderstanding is, though, remains to be seen.

(If I were to guess I think they hooked up, Ji was confused and needed some space to process, and Achi took it as a rejection and left the country (since we’ve seen that his mother lives in the US). But I'm probably wrong.)

Ji's actions, so far, are not irredeemable (he’s not even on the verge of being irredeemable). And if they were, Achi’s actions would be just as irredeemable.

It’s easy to play the blame game, especially in today’s world. It’s a lot more difficult to be open-minded. But the latter will always be more rewarding.

TL;DR: Both Achi and Ji have made mistakes, they are both terrible at communicating, and both are clearly confused and/or terrified of their feelings. No one is at “fault” for their current situation because they’re both responsible for it.

*stepping down from my soapbox*

[cancerian-woman]

people don’t want to understand bonnie fans because they don’t want to touch or even acknowledge any sort of racism. either they fear being seen as racist OR don’t want their opinion of the show tainted and wake up to the fact that that so many other people regard their favorite show with disdain lol

(it’s (mostly) all about image! it’s the same with how people call damon a rapist regarding season 1. It’s a bad look to stan him so it’s best to deflect, deny, be delusional, attack and try to bully people out.)

i do love the show but i do hope and pray something (a book or show) done by someone who is more socially aware replaces tvd for me. nothing hits what tvd did idk

anyway about fandom, i just stick to tumblr now. i was on the tvd subreddit for a couple years and it was exhausting when it came to bonnie. it’s sad but im way too sensitive regarding her so i stick to my bubble 😢

You’d be right. Fandoms can be very white centered. Some people choose to willingly be ignorant to harmful tropes that are pushed in media period.

I’ve met so many Damon stans that act like that through that subreddit 😭. They deny it ever happened and argue he would not do such things when we were shown. I do blame a bit of that on the writing. Ex: Chuck from GG had to have his predatory ass behavior addressed while making him an LI. But Julie/Caroline Dries is the head of the Damon/DE fan-club in this regard so they’ll never. Will never forget them insulting Elena just to bash Bonnie/Bamon the year after Julie’s “apology” for telling POC stories incorrectly. I would say apology to Kat but she didn’t even say her name in the “apology.” To my knowledge Ian is the only one who said Damon was a rapist.

I left that subreddit too. It felt like a cyber-microaggression. Just off the top of my head I remember the Bonnie is racist to Caroline debacles, the claims that because Bonnie was disliked back in 09-10 that’s why Kat never got screentime and the “Kat shouldn’t complain about her hair on TVD if she’s going to wear weaves…” situation. That’s not even the tip of iceberg.

The TO subreddit is just as bad if not worse. The arguments about Marcel as if he’s devil himself. The constant battle boarding and the fans who developed a superiority complex the way the Mikaelson’s have. You’d think this was a well-written franchise. We are not watching Breaking Bad, you need to calm down tf lmao. Immediately.

I experienced a user saying Marcel was unimportant in the narrative but dare you argue against Hayley “she’s the reason the show exists!”. The show about the Mikaelsons?! But why do they get mad when you say K&E aren’t the protagonist she is….

I love engaging through tumblr. It’s generally more nuanced and people are nicer here than anywhere else. I genuinely think you can find a sweet fan in every corner. Whether that person is an Elena, Bonnie, Caroline, Salvatores, Mikaelsons etc. More people are open to going: “Hey,this is trash! But what if you expanded this idea here…”. It’s just fun here! People are more open to fanon concepts which brings bigger discussions. Yes, it’s some bad seeds in certain areas but people aren’t as… idk weird so to speak.

I think as long as we encourage fantasy authors to keep telling their stories we can find another story to fill the gaps that TVD has. I get what you mean though.

[docholligay]

Episode 2.4: Bullet points

Hello! This is about up to Episode 4 of season 2 of Yellowjackets, and ONLY episode 4 of season 2 of Yellowjackets. I have not seen beyond the ninth episode, at all, and know NOTHING about this show. Please do not spoil it for me.  Things that are spoilery in nature, for me, include: saying things like  “Just wait!!” confirming or denying anything I put forward, outside information about the cast interviews or creator statements, leading questions like “Do you think “blank moment” means anything?” etc. Remember  that Y’ALL HAVE SEEN THE SHOW AND I HAVE NOT. This informs the way you  talk about things relating to the show. Just be really careful is all  I’m asking. Also: If there is LITERALLY any stance I  could take on this show or character that would make you upset, please  just fucking block the tag

Is it just me, or is the theme song opener getting more distorted? I like the idea of this, I like the notion that as we follow these girls down, even human speech becomes more and more garbled to us, all of this makes less and less sense. They are further and further from being a person, even. 

Watching Jeff is so interesting for me, because on the one hand, I think there’s a part of him that knows that Shauna got back their van in an absolutely insane way, and I think he even likes it, but on the other, that same broken pressure cooker is the reason she had an affair with Adam. And he seems genuinely hurt by the fact that other people know about her and Adam, even outside of “They very much suspect you killed him” 

What do I think about Walter and Misty? I mean, I am having fun, but what do I think is Walter’s angle? I assuredly do not think he is innocent in any of this, and don’t feel confident that he isn’t planning anything or involved in anything, as much as I would love it to be true that they are just a match made in heaven and they can run off together to be the most insanely bizarre couple the world has ever seen. I want that, but I don’t think I actually think that. I loved the whole B&B thing. 

Speaking of, kind of, I fucking love Evita. Hamilton wishes it could offer such an ultimately complicated look at a historical figure. But so much of Evita, too, is about becoming and intention. And how intentions, to a certain point, get lost or dont’ even matter, when it comes down to it. I am choosing to believe this is a very thoughtful choice from someone who has a knowledge of both bombastic musicals and good writing sense. 

So we think Coach Ben stole the meat, right? I don’t know who else would given that he is the one not eating people, though I confess he’s right about not being nimble in the snow. Speaking of BEN! I am in love with that flashback with him and Paul, because it brought me to something that I hadn’t yet realized: Ben is, just like the girls, someone who is going to be stuck before he ever got to have a life. I should have realized this, he’s a gay man in the 90s, he did not get to have history and memories and all of those things because he was so busy being miserably closeted. He was, like the girls, like Travis, only just beginning to have a life that he could call his own, and it was also stolen from him, and he TOO, has an immense amount of tragedy to cope with in that. That’s why the main coacjh had to die in the crash but Ben had to live--the head coach had a life, but Ben is just the same as the girls. 

Can’t wait to figure out what the whole story with the dripping sound is. A thaw? Like a metaphorical thaw? We hear it when Taissa is walking along the road looking for Van, who, as I said, is tied in to Tai’s downfall and the Shadow!Tai’s control. Can’t wait to see how Mari is involved (Is this Mari quite literally haunting the narrative?)

Akilah is dead, right? Actually on that note, Akilah and Mari both better be dead. I really like Akilah, but she is the kind of character we are supposed to like. They are enriching her and making her loveable because she is the puppy they intend to kill. She’s studying for the SAT, she’s adopting mice, she’s talking about how badly she wants to see her nephew again, and, sorry Akilah. But! I mean, at this point we have so many survivors that we are running out of characters we have any investment with to kill. We need deaths that matter. I am, admittedly, very disappointed by Van’s survival. We know nat lives, Lottie, Shauna, Misty, Travis, Van I mean come on. We need Mari and Akilah, as the only characters with development left, to both die. Coach Ben too, though I admit on a personal level that I perversely hope he survived and sent the postcards and is hunting them or some shit. 

So speaking of, Javi’s alive, huh? Boo and also hiss. 

[apphiarothowrites]

Ruffled Feathers v3

(as stated in a comment in the other thread, v2 would just be marco in his like 60s going back to before teach's betrayal and spending 20 minutes hugging people, so instead I present to you version 3: mid 20s marco, fresh off of a particularly harrowing period of his life, has firmly started his slut phase when shot forward in time a couple decades and sets his sights on Ace, much to Current Marco's amusement. The first couple paragraphs of this are exactly the same as version 1 for convenience because I don't want to write a brand new way to do this)

It's a purposefully quiet day on the Moby Dick when a flash of light and sound knocks the crew on their collective asses. That morning Pops had, after breakfast, planted himself in his chair with a thoughtful looking Marco seated on the arm and proclaimed he wanted the day to be as uneventful as possible. Ace had been just as confused as most everyone else.

Except, notably, the eldest members of the crew. Rakuyo, Jozu, Vista, Teach, and Izou all lingered on deck throughout the day with tiny smirks or shared looks of amusement. Every time they caught Marco's slight frown their own smirks got bigger. Something was going on, and Ace couldn't quite figure out what.

Then the flash happens, and someone drops into a heap on the deck from about ten feet up. They stagger upright with everyone who had been knocked down by the accompanying blast, rubbing a hand over their face and groaning.

Then Ace is knocked right back onto his ass when he gets a look at who the mysterious person is.

It's Marco. Only not.

Only different. He's shorter than Ace is used to, only a few inches over Ace's eyeline than the full head. Only dressed differently-a white shirt open to reveal a very fresh looking tattoo that couldn't be more than a year under the skin with black capris and slip-on shoes instead of strapped sandals. Only no sash, just the tailfeather belt trailing from the front of his pants.

It's Marco-only not. Only different. Only younger.

Distantly, over the strange ringing in his ears, Ace can hear Pops laughing.

The new Marco leaps back up to his feet before Ace really registers what's going on. When Ace looks up, it's to a hand in his face offering assistance. He takes it and is genuinely, pleasantly, surprised when the New Marco does all the work hoisting him upright.

Ace brushes himself off, patting dust off his pants and his hat, then looks up to meet the New Marco's eye. Instead of surprise or shock, which Ace expects, he's met with something else. Hooded eyes, a thoughtful downturn to the mouth, and something hot smouldering underneath. It honestly reminds him of something he'd seen late at night in Marco's bed and that thought has Ace blushing.

"Guararararara! Look at that!" Pops says, his voice suddenly breaking the moment.

New Marco immediately refocuses, eyes going wide. He takes off in a dead sprint past Ace, voice carrying, "Holy shit, Pops, what the hell happened to you-yoi?"

Ace turns around to follow the movement. Pops stoops down to catch the young man who throws himself into his arms. Immediately the New Marco settles himself into the crook of Pops' arm, shins tucked in against his massive chest. "You're an old man!"

Somewhere to the side, Izou and others are laughing. Comments about how cute, how darling, Marco looks are passed between gasps for air and wiped tears of mirth.

"An old man who can still kick your ass, little bird! Nothing's happened to me, you've taken a tumble forward is all."

Ace steps around Pops to look back at the man's chair. Marco, the older one, his Marco is still seated with his spine and shoulder propped against the chair back. Arms crossed, he watches the scene unfolding with a kind of passivity that's usually reserved for watching the deck work instead of such a strange situation.

But Ace takes his cues from the weirdly calm acceptance of the situation and chooses not to freak out. Up above, New Marco looks around the ship and takes everything in.

"A tumble forward...?"

Another second to scan the deck before his eyes settle on Ace again. That look comes back, the barely concealed bedroom eyes, and the tone of New Marco's question does not match it at all.

"Did I miss lunch-yoi?"

[alitgblog]

s11 vol 4 thoughts

learned nothing in the challenge except that fusebox has forgotten how to draw liquids bc the slime looked so weird on MC

even the love triangle is boring now like can you do something, Tunde? Like yeah okay he's like flirty during the challenge but outside of MC being invited to the sleepover, has he really made the effort to come over and talk to MC and like slander Callums name or something???

I miss Zabrina. I know she and Vida do the same antagonistic things but it's not the same

Esme and Jace is an interesting enough storyline, like I'm not sure how long fusebox is keeping them together and how they're gonna break up tbh so the fact it's not completely formulaic is something. I just wish the non formulaic stuff was happening to MC too.

It's interesting doing a straight route instead of a bi one for MC this time bc I'm sure I'd be more okay with Ruby acting how she is if it was justified by her wanting to pursue MC. But now, with her just in a friend couple and no other prospects, I think she's being kinda rude to Ren, and it hurts me to have to be on a man's side, but from my perspective she's always whining about being in a friend couple. Sure, he's been given more opportunity than her to flirt with other islanders (Vida, Zabrina), but they don't even feel like friends. And so when he is making out with Felicity, I am genuinely happy with him finding a connection. And if this was a bi route, I kinda needed them to make Felicity bi and then do the S6 thing and have MC decide between Felicity or Ruby to keep (i.e., Ren to couple with so she stays in the villa).

And then i immediately regret backing Ren because he betrays Felicity and does a 180 starts going after Anna??? Ruin his character and for what. At least he gets smacked in the face afterwards when Anna says she doesn't want him but will take the ticket back to the villa (but again, doesn't make sense in the context of the format of the show???? I hate them doing that but the sleepover thing in general already fucks with the system so whatever). also such a shame for my game personally bc I actually really like Ren's sprite

rip Felicity you were too pretty to hang out with the rest of the slightly off cast. at least we got to tell off Ren for you 😘

Alternative: MC has already made her decision between Tunde and Callum, just have one of them choose Anna and Ren be upset but outvoted to bring back Felicity (votes could line up bc we didn't need to have Jace come back from the sleepover early???). simply I just yearn that someone else in the villa can be mc's friend and doesn't SUCK (I know we have Esme but seriously? only one friend? Arguably Jace but i dont fw him)

Anna sucks but we knew that. I will say, at least she's got a distinct personality with her acting thing, versus Vida and Zabrina are almost interchangeable. If she was a bit more delusional in her acting career and less successful in her bullying, she would be Lexi.

something about her face looks so much like ava though and I know I kinda came around on Ava mostly bc I enjoy a toxic couple in the villa but I do hope we see less of Anna bc I want different storylines

Shout-out to fusebox writing team this one time bc when Anna was listing her credentials MC and I had the same reaction

Two mean girls in the villa sucks. it was funny when I pretended it was just MC and Zabrina being equally mean to each other but now it's just two embarrassing mean girls saying they want Callum and in his defense he doesn't show interest in either, but he's gonna need to do a little more considering how insistent they both are and how his attempts to shut them up amount to nothing?

Now would be a great time for personality differences. Like if Kane, Ren, and Callum acted differently reacting to these girls fighting for them that would be great and wouldn't even necessarily need to change the plot/branch out all that much. but like if one is more passive and one is more aggressive in saying no, would be a small bit appreciated detail.

If they didn't already pull this last season I wouldn't be surprised if next volume some weird rules come up and MC ends up the single girl and dumped, then come back in a sleepover with Dominic and/or Felicity. although I do think they may bring felicity back somehow? like I feel like she got a big enough moment that they surely don't waste her on just this one volume (though they've done that with people like Tyler ifnyou dont couple with him)

[roobylavender]

no bcs i cried too !!! the children thinking of the children :(( i started the sequel immediately after i finished beartown like it was so serious for me i had to return to that little town in the middle of nowhere 🫠 i love love benji amat bobo AND maya and ana ( SISTERS THEY R SISTERS 💖💖 “never again do you find friends like the ones you have when you’re friend” 😭) the way benji his mother and his sisters r with each other like omfg 🥲 how they tell him they love him always kiss him on the head and scold him too for wtv he’s done what if i died ?? how enduring and strong and wonderful fatima is too omg all the mothers of this book were so realistic i felt,,, kira and her whole “career woman” conflict and js EVERYTHING abt her how she feels like a bad mother somtimes for being away so much ,,, her relationship w peter was so good i love them !!! i esp was interested in the way the writing humanized kevin and the build up to it : we see him as the star of the town someone diligent who knows nothing else but hockey ( i will not lie i saw some kevin day parallels there LOL) and how distant his parents r and the way he spent more time at benjis home than his own !! the way the entire assault was handled w kevin and maya was rlly good to me even w the anger and disgust i felt for kevin i understood how scared he was and god the way maya became scared of the dark and the parallels to that w the end and what she did to kevin for herself i am SCREAMING !!!!!! the way the children of the hollow and more specifically amat and zacharias were picked on and the lingering racism too and later when amat chooses the team (briefly , he chooses them briefly, but nonetheless) how zacharias feels betrayed bcs amat gave him a reason for living ! the almost insane (v insane actually) way beartown devotes itself to hockey as a hockey town and how they blames peter and maya for the loss of the game oooh my heart (tfw ur wrong but don’t know it and the actually horribleness is ur behavior for the sake of a sport versus the well-being of one ur own town’s children) the love the players of the junior team hold for david and how he loves them in return the pucks w words THE PUCKS W WORDS [slams head against enclosure] how clinical david felt at the thought of getting sune’s job but also how jealous he was of the way peter and sune would spend time together in the office without inviting him ,,, i was so 💔 abt ramona and holge and how she hadn’t seen a hockey match since his death 😭 the way the ppl of beartown open their doors and offer coffee bcs they don’t speak much and the motto is ask simple questions w difficult answers and how everyone opened their doors and offered coffee for kevin’s mom but no one did for kira ,,, the viciousness of the children of beartown and how leo stood beside his sister and played games w her ,,, they’re everything actually . the way backman portrayed how many survivors end up having to be strong for those around them like maya was 💔 how benji fought for kevin bcs he was miskiin and he became his violence and kevin the genius but also how they both possssed the opposite in them more than they realized !! benjis violence and the way the ppl of beartown would say he’d end up going bad ,,, genuinely so sick to my stomach 😭 how ana felt free among animals and more comfortable versus being among her peers and feeling different and weird compared to them ,,,

sorry for the blab omg but this book has perhaps gotten me out of my reading slump ?? alx 🙏🙏

i feel so bad because i read the first two books a couple of years ago so a lot of the specific details escape me but i definitely remember feeling this crazy over it as well! the way fredrik backman weaves human connections together is so breathtaking i can't wait to reread these books and then finally read the third one!

[ayangamelia]

Troubled Water.

I just found out that my stepmother is facing profound hurt and has been attempting to leave home a couple of times because of pressure from some members of the big family. I was not aware of this until yesterday when she did it again. My father's quiet approach to solving things didn't help much (as with any other family issues we had faced), making her more angry and hurtful. I was putting up boundaries at first for my own sake, but in the end, I couldn't help but make them sit down and talk about it. I am not gonna lie, I still feel the hurt and confusion that I have. I remembered how their previous actions had hurt me, and it took me some time to fully accept this situation. I never really shared all of these processes with them or anyone else in the family. But now, I am comforting them. Nobody did it but me.

Since last month, my sister-in-law has been telling me how her marriage with my brother is falling apart. Sometimes she extends her grief to me by saying very mean and hurtful things. Her story shatters me as a fellow woman, as a daughter of the family she mentioned as a failure, and as a little kid who looked up to his older brother who was apparently unable to manage his own emotions. I could not reach my brother as he chose to be so reluctant to talk about the whole situation to me. But still, I keep listening and trying my best to comfort my sister-in-law. Again, I did not choose this role. But I could not help it. Nobody did it but me.

Last week my ex said that he dated someone new only after a month or so since we broke up. I don't even want to talk about it anymore. It's his decision, even though if I can argue, he should know why it hurts because in March we still met and shared some love even though not all of it might be genuine. It is not exactly wrong, but he knew it would hurt me. It is not that hurtful now, and I am aware his decision has nothing to do with me. We weren't really a match anyway. But now, I just feel so numb.

It's like now I am accumulating hurts, sinking in troubled water. I feel so helpless because all of this is not within my control. I am so afraid that I will lose my light.

Tomorrow I'll be back to Jakarta. I don't really know what to do.

[slowfridays]

im actually crying … holy shit. where the hell do i begin in describing how much i love this? 😮‍💨

i am SO so in love with how this was written, and no, i am not exaggerating. each description, each line exchanged did not fail to make my heart happy, namely:

(1) You decided you liked his laughter and the smile that came with it. goshdarn u are ABSOLUTELY RIGHT and this sentence feels like it was MADE for lee seokmin…literally try to imagine anyone else. it will inevitably be him. my god.

(2) the dynamic set between dk and the reader is SOOOO NEAT im not even joking like oh my god. their exchange about “YOLO” and trying it out (auditions) vs resting even for a while???? that was so crazy i swear…and then followed up with dk being so smug and happy about reader inadvertently calling him a friend!!! i could feel his happiness all throughout that scene despite the teasing and the flustered state of the reader, which spoke volumes of how well their dynamic was going to be like!

(3) Too busy saving the world? … ‘perhaps because he sounded almost genuinely proud of you every time he said it’. GOD. fiction is fiction, but goshdarn i want a man like this so so so bad… oh deekay i am forever going to be a spinster bc of u .

(4) seokmin’s right, reader is so cute. as someone with anxiety, i love how the hint of anxiety warning was played into the reader here, in that it was very subtle but all too relatable, whether or not that was the intention. i love the part where she spaced out bc of how she was slowly realizing her feelings and then suddenly being caught by seokmin then being told by shes cute after like. BRO. HOW DO U SURVIVE THAT. u dont

(5) FOREHEAD KISS FOREHEAD KISS FOREHEAD KISS FOREHEAD KISS FOREHEAD KISS!!!!!! the absolute pinnacle it all… changed lives and altered my brain chemistry forever. the initial hesitation between the two, until deekay steps into the fixed…line…set, and lets himself in and takes that risk and goes for it and reader lets him ohhhhhh im going insane. i love how they were initially hesitant until they werent. “i dont mind.” MY GOD

(6) love… is a bowl of fruit. 🍉 gah damn. seokmin noticing the slight change in reader’s mood and calming her down in the process before anything else got standard; and also, him noticing that bc hes just that observational about her, CHOOSES to be that observational FOR her… the way he drops everything to take care of her just feels so very lee seokmin to me, and my heart just lurches so much at this. THEN you even add that as she works he feeds her fruit. like what the FUCK. jail time. that was the last straw im absolutely insane by now. the tea making too??? wow. WOW. and… you know… all of this just to say: me when

(7) The Talk. 🗣️ i love how reader was the one who brought it up like omygod that was so so. heartwarming in the best way. i guess its bc i think that it showed multitudes on reader’s part, in that we know she has anxiety or at least shows traits of an anxious person, and i guess that just felt very human to me? but also: i love how seokmin responded. i love how respectful he was of her boundaries, of her choices, of what she wanted. it felt to me that his love was just that great, coupled with the fact of just how warm and lovely of a person he is. what a beautiful thing it must be then, to be loved by lee seokmin.

(8) ill be in the front row. ull get sick of me. i could never. AHUSHAHAUSHA . OK . ALRIGHT its ok im fine ahahaudhau god this is so ! i know cheesy couples say that all the time, but deekay is a corny man that has nothing but authentic cheesiness in every bone he has. just… honestly, one of the reasons this fic felt so vivid to me and why i couldnt stop punching my pillow and smiling tonight.

🤎 man, i could go on and on and on: but bottomline is that i really enjoyed reading rhis fic. happy tears were mentioned mostly at the end and that is what i was left with as i finished reading thisl i’m really glad i saved this and then read it just now. thank you for writing this; i treasure this one so much. :”) 🤎

Dreamers

Lee Seokmin (DK) x fem!reader

Genre: mostly fluff, with a hint of anxiety

Word Count: 10.9k

Wanings: food mentions. adult language. a few parts may come off as suggestive, but not really. y/n is an environmentalist but not vegan.

[Series: Serenity Street 17] Sleepwalking is a nasty issue. You find yourself in the correct building but wrong apartment, sharing a room with a ridiculously cute boy who seems to find it amusing.

Note: This one goes out to all of my ambitious girlies! Keep working towards your dreams!

The moment you stepped onto the evening bus you regretted the decision. 

With a bright smile, Sunny greeted you, rushing to move her bags into her lap so you could take the seat next to her, all while never once taking her eyes off you. Her brows rose in a questioning manner. You cursed under your breath as your neighbour’s usual warm smile morphed into a look of disbelief when you sank into the seat next to her.

With a sigh, you raised a hand to silence her. “I know.”

But she didn’t take the hint. “When was the last time you slept? Did you sleep at all last night?”

“Why do you keep asking questions you already know the answer to?” you whined and hugged your bag close to your chest. “I’m sure you heard me showering at 3 am.”

“The bags under your eyes aren’t supposed to make it look like you have a black eye,” she told you as if she hadn’t heard you at all, still eyeing you in worry. “How much did you sleep? You look worse than Jeonghan when he thought I was mad at him.”

“Does it matter?” You huffed. “At least I’m getting some rest.” 

“I think it only counts as rest if you actually get 8 hours of sleep every once in a while,” she countered with a snicker, “which, by the looks of it,” she gave you a once-over, followed by a disappointed a sigh, “you haven’t had in years.”

“I sleep just fine. I’m healthy, I am productive,” you defended and tightened your hold on your bag. “Sleep is for the weak anyway.”

Sunny rolled her eyes. “Sometimes I wonder how you’re friends with me but not Jihoon. Your mentality is almost identical.”

“Listen, somebody has to do the work. And unlike some, I’d actually like my work to amount to something bigger than an average paycheck that barely covers my bills. I have ambitions. I want to make the world a better place.”

“Honey, at this rate you’re not gonna live long enough to see your ambitions come to life,” she grumbled under her breath and linked your arms. “It’s okay to rest every once in a while. Take a week off from work and actually just do something fun for a change.”

You grimaced. “I’d rather not. Messes with my groove.”

Sunny had no words left to say. She stared at you with a wide mouth for a moment before sputtering, “How– How are we friends?”

“Fate brought us together so you could nag me at all possible hours,” you joked, looking out the window now to avoid missing your stop. “But seriously, I don’t need to rest. I love my job and my colleagues and I’m making a change.”

“You should at least go to sleep early tonight.”

“Can’t. I have a big report due next week and I don’t want to miss my deadlines.”

Her gaze hardened immediately as she cursed, “Why, you little–”

“Hey!”

“I’m just worried about you,” she mumbled through a pout just as your bus arrived at your shared destination. With a begrudging sigh, she unlinked your arms and gave you an encouraging pat on the shoulder as the two of you stood up and walked over to the door “Well, I guess it’s your life. But I swear–” she pointed at your face, eyes squinted in a glare; she interrupted herself mid-sentence, “no, I vow that if you collapse under the stress, I’ll personally go and hand in a letter of resignation in your name.”

You scoffed at her empty promises, smiled, and stepped off the bus. You had no doubt you would be just fine and she was overreacting over nothing. She couldn’t wrap her mind around your work ethic and goals – she was built of an entirely different wood.

Then again, you couldn’t deny you often felt a little jealous of her. The nagging feeling hit once again when you looked up to find Jeonghan standing at the gate of your building, his smile widening the closer Sunny and you got to him. You envied that she had found – through trials and tribulations, you’d admit – a perfect man to brighten her days while you had no time to even contemplate romance.

“How was your day, my beautiful lady?” Jeonghan greeted your neighbour with a sweet kiss on her forehead before taking her bag and leading her inside with a hand on her back. He didn’t forget to offer you a welcoming smile and a friendly “good evening” as well, both of which you returned.

“Are you going to the 5th floor tonight?” you asked them as the three of you trudged up the stairs and they made no effort to walk to her apartment. 

Sunny nodded. “It’s movie night and he has the bigger TV.”

Jeonghan let out a loud ‘ha!’ and grinned at her victoriously. “So you admit it. My TV’s better than yours!”

“That’s–” She sighed deeply. “That is not the point right now–”

“How is it not?”

Unable to continue watching their lovers’ quarrel, you hummed and waved them goodbye before promptly unlocking your apartment, walking in, and quickly locking it again as if their bickering or cheesy nicknames could otherwise follow after you. 

You had far more important things to do, after all. 

With a tired sigh, you warmed up some of last night’s leftovers and opened your laptop. The familiar Times New Roman font on your screen prompted a soft groan, but still you squared your shoulders and got to work. 

If you were quick, you’d get this done way before the deadline. Maybe you could even go to work in the morning with a nearly finished report! You smiled at the thought. 

But life doesn’t always go as expected. 

You thought you were old enough to know this fact already. After all, when had life ever followed your expectations? It seemed to enjoy throwing curve balls right at your head.

You woke up with a splitting headache at 7 am, an hour before your usual alarm. It was strange – you concluded so as you stared at the time on your phone through a squint. With a soft huff, you let the phone drop back onto the mattress and your head onto the pillows.

“Sorry, did I wake you?” you then heard a voice.

Your eyes snapped open. There was someone in your room. 

The voice sounded apologetic as it continued in a whisper, “It’s okay. I didn’t mean to make any noise. Sorry. Let me just get my shirt and–”

You sat up abruptly to stare at the intruder – a handsome familiar-looking man shuffled around the walk-in closet. Worst of all – he was shirtless. You dreaded to think of what had happened the night before.

“Who– Who are you?” you stuttered out, instinctively lifting the blanket higher against your torso despite the fact that you were fully clothed. “Why are you in my apart–” 

Then it hit you. The worst of the worst realities. 

“Holy shit, this isn’t my apartment!” you screamed and jumped out of bed to apologise profusely. “I’m so so sorry! I had no idea! I don’t how–”

“Hey, hey!” The man – now wearing a crispy white button-up shirt – walked out of the closet hurriedly, a worried smile on his face as he rushed to comfort you with a gentle hand on your back, leading you to sit back on the bed. “It’s okay.” He let out a laugh. “I was going to let you sleep for a while more. It’s okay.”

You had no clue how he could be so calm about this. What the hell happened last night?!

You stuttered. You sputtered. You gasped for air like a fish out of the water. You were on the verge of a panic attack at 7 am in the morning and he was smiling, all while patting and rubbing your back like it was the most natural thing. 

“Why am I here?” you eventually managed to breathe out. You hated to admit that his calm and friendly nature was helping you adjust to the situation.

He raised a brow, his soothing movements stopping. “I was hoping you could answer that.” 

When you made no move to do so and only offered him a puzzled look, he shrugged. “I woke up to someone trying to unlock my door at 2 am. Almost cried, actually, but then I heard a knock and Mingyu telling me to open the door, so I did and you…” He gestured widely to his room. “Well, you came in and went straight to bed as if it was your own home. I didn’t know what to do but Mingyu and I figured you needed to rest.”

You stared at him with a dropped jaw. “You didn’t think to call the police?”

“Well,” he grimaced, “I was going to but you really looked like you needed to sleep.” He gave you a worried look, inspecting your face. “You still do, actually. Do you sleep at all, like, outside of my bed?”

“I sleep plenty,” you scoffed and got out of the bed, wiping your face with your sleeves as if to rid it of any evidence that might suggest otherwise. With an awkward look, you bowed and began heading out. “Well, thank you for… your hospitality. I’ll get going. I’m sorry for bothering you. This won’t happen again.”

Before he could say another word, you slammed the door shut behind you and began heading… where were you heading?

You looked around the hallway. It was still your building. You could recognise these hallways even in your sleep. A quick glance informed you that you had just stepped out of apartment 1D – the apartment directly below yours.

You groaned as the realisation sank in that you could never visit the first floor without feeling awkward again. With a sigh, you headed up the stairs to your own apartment.

“Isn’t that Seokmin’s apartment?” Sunny pointed out when you told her of your horrible adventure on the bus home from work later that day. She frowned a little as she tried to recall exactly who lived there. 

“Whoever it was, at least it wasn’t Jihoon.” You shuttered to even think about it.

Sunny grimaced. “Yeah, I’d be bailing you both out of jail right about now.” She then shrugged. “Yeah, I think that’s Seokmin’s apartment. He really just let you stay the night there?”

“Apparently?” You wanted to laugh at the insanity of the situation. “I have no recollection of what happened or how I ended up there. The last thing I remember is working on my report in my kitchen and then waking up in a shirtless man’s apartment.”

“Shirt–” She almost broke her neck at the speed she turned her head to look at you with wide eyes. “He was shirtless when you woke up?!”

“He was getting dressed for work–”

“Well, is he hot?!”

You had never wanted to throw someone out of a moving vehicle so much before. “Is this what you’re focusing on right now? I’m going through a crisis here!”

“Yeah but–”

“You literally have a boyfriend!”

“Yeah, but–” She paused mid-excuse and nodded her head in acknowledgement. “Right. You have a point there.”

“How did I possibly end up in his apartment at night without remembering it?” you contemplated, leaning your head back against the seat. “I can’t think of a single explanation.”

“It is weird,” Sunny hummed in agreement as the bus rolled to your stop. The two of you got off. 

“Where’s Jeonghan?” you wondered in surprise upon not seeing him all the way up to the second floor.

Sunny shrugged, still deep in thought about your predicament. “I don’t know. Probably causing trouble with Junhui again. Possibly getting on Joshua’s or Hyesoo’s nerves. Maybe he stole someone’s mail or took the hinges off someone’s door. Not my problem.”

You could only stare at her in absolute wonder. “He’s your boyfriend.”

“He’s his own person.” She then clapped her hands together in revelation, stopping in her steps in the middle of the hallway. “Didn’t you say you used to sleep-walk as a kid? I swear you mentioned it over coffee once.”

You nodded. “Yeah, but it hasn’t happened in a literal decade.”

“Who’s to say it didn’t happen again last night?” she suggested with a shrug. “By the way, do you wanna come over for coffee and cake? Jeonghan bought one on sale because the expiration date is today, but it’s sort of giant.”

After contemplating for a moment (more of a debate really, won by the grumbling of your stomach), you agreed and followed her into her apartment. 

As the two of you walked into the kitchen, she continued, “All I’m saying is that there’s a lot going on in your life right now and maybe it all worked together – the stress, the lack of sleep, you get the gist – and now you’re sleepwalking again.”

“I sincerely doubt it.”

“You should see a doctor about that,” Jeonghan suggested. You jumped in your spot before finding him sitting at the dining table, fully focused on assembling a lego set. He continued without a care in the world, “Sleepwalking can be a serious issue.”

Your eyes narrowed. “Why are you here?”

He finally glanced up to offer you an amused look and a chuckle. “I’m her boyfriend. Where else would I be?”

“I invited her over for coffee and cake,” Sunny informed him with a kiss on his cheek. “Play nice.”

“Yes, princess,” he spoke in reply before turning back to you. “But I would really go to the doctor if I was you. If it’s bad enough that you wake up in someone else’s apartment, it’s bad enough to warrant a doctor’s visit.”

You felt yourself pale, your blood running both ice cold and lava hot. “How– Why do you know that?”

“It’s the talk of the town,” he joked before waving his joke off. “Just kidding. I met Seokmin on my way to the store earlier and he told me. He seemed worried about you.”

“So it is Seokmin!” Sunny cheered victoriously. “I knew it! I told you!”

Jeonghan raised an eyebrow and laughed. “Good job.”

“Thanks.”

You sat down at the table and slumped in the chair. “But if I’m sleepwalking, why did I go to his apartment?”

“Isn’t it right below yours?” Jeonghan pointed out like it was obvious. “Asleep you probably thought you were going to your own apartment. You just mixed up the floors.”

“So,” you sighed and rubbed the bridge of your nose before meeting his eyes and maintaining eye contact, “what you’re suggesting is that I fell asleep–”

“Yes.”

“–in my apartment–”

“Mhm.”

“–then left my apartment for some reason–”

“That much seems obvious.”

“–and then went to Seokmin’s apartment–”

“For some reason, yes.”

“–one level below my own?”

Eyes widening, he hummed at the slight error in the logic. “You do have a point. Why would you leave your own apartment to go to your apartment?”

“My head hurts just listening to this,” Sunny informed the two of you while serving the cake. As a slice fell over on a plate she quickly assigned to Jeonghan, she suddenly suggested, “What if you thought you were going on a walk and then returned home?”

Jeonghan leaned back in his chair, crossing his arms over his chest as he began recounting, “So, what you think happened is that she fell asleep–”

“I’m going to kick the both of you out if you start again,” his girlfriend declared all of a sudden, pointing a knife in his direction. “I’m serious.”

“It is a reasonable guess though,” you decided as Sunny placed a plate of cake in front of you. “I do love going on walks when I’m stressed.”

“Then–”

A knock on the door interrupted the conversation. You watched in mild amusement as Sunny and Jeonghan silently argued over who should open the door and if they should open the door at all. Eventually, to your surprise, Jeonghan relented and got up with a slight groan. The moment he was out of the kitchen, Sunny stole his seat across from you.

“I think the worst part is that I don’t know how to face him again, like ever,” you started the conversation again while taking a bite of the cake. “It was so awkward.”

“Speaking of awkward,” Jeonghan announced and led the newest guest into the apartment. The now familiar feeling of both ice and lava in your veins made a new appearance as you recognised the visitor. Your spoon dropped back on the table.

Seokmin offered you a friendly smile and a wave. “Ah, so that’s where you are. I tried your door but no one answered so I wondered if I had the wrong place.”

“You–” That was the only syllable you managed to voice. Your brain was scattered, filled with pictures of the awkward morning as well as a single fluttering butterfly carrying an obnoxious sign that said ‘he cares’. You gulped. 

Thankfully, Sunny stepped in. She smiled brightly and ushered Seokmin to take a seat while she found an extra plate. 

“I wasn’t going to come and bother anyone–” he tried to reject the offer of cake, but failed to. He was too friendly for his own good – just like the rumours around the building often said. He sat in the seat Sunny had preoccupied just seconds ago, right across from you, and smiled at her. “Well, if you insist.”

“What can I do?” Jeonghan sighed and theatrically looked away as he started his monologue. “Everyone loves my girlfriend so much. How can I possibly keep her–”

“Stop being melodramatic and come eat, idiot,” Sunny laughed and took the seat next to you. “So, Seokmin, what brings you to my friend over here?”

Seokmin opened his mouth to reply before turning to you and softly asking, “Is it okay to talk about it here?”

Sunny chuckled. “About her waking up in your apartment? Go ahead. I think everyone in the building knows already.”

“Oh.” He offered you an awkward-looking smile. “Well, sorry about that. I only mentioned it to Mingyu and Jeonghan but I guess– Nevermind. I just wanted to tell you to not worry about it.” His smile brightened, genuine and full of warmth all of a sudden. “We all have rough days – and rough nights – and I’m just glad you got some rest.”

“I have one question,” Jeonghan raised his arm before asking, “where did you sleep?”

“Me?” Seokmin shrugged. “The sofa. There was a woman in my bed.”

You somehow felt both worse and better than before. At least you knew he didn’t hold a grudge – after all, he seeked you out just to tell you it had been fine – but at the same time: you made this poor man sleep on the sofa instead of his objectively comfortable bed.

“I’m so sorry–”

“I said it’s fine,” he laughed and reached out to pat your hand. “I really don’t mind. You looked like you were sleeping very well. But–” he tilted his head in thought, a slight frown appearing, “–is it possible you were sleepwalking? You didn’t react at all last night, to anything. You just… brushed past us like we weren’t even there. I don’t know if you even had your eyes open.”

Sunny all but slammed her spoon on the table to give you a haughty look. “Yep. Told you. You were sleepwalking.”

You frowned. “I guess it’s possible.”

“Should I…” Seokmin scrunched up his nose in thought. “Should I maybe keep a look out in case this happens again?”

Immediately you shook your head. “No. No need. It was a one-time thing. A fluke. It was nothing. Won’t happen again.” In your attempts to not look at him, you happened to eye the clock. Your jaw dropped. “Oh. I should go home. I have–”

“–a report due in a week and deadlines to meet,” Sunny finished for you with a laugh. “I know, I know. Go.”

Jeonghan spoke up as well, “Take the plate and another slice of cake before you go. I want to know you eat at least a little between your work.”

You did as you were told and made your escape without another word, not even a goodbye to Seokmin. 

You had no time to feel guilty or consider that your heart fluttered a little at the thought of him coming to find you. Once again, you buried your feelings into lines of Times New Roman in your report.

“Oh, you come here too?” you heard his voice just two days later at the grocery store. 

It was a little surprising to find him there: the store was a good mile further from the one closest to your building. Like a startled owl, you stared and blinked at him in the cereal aisle. 

As you opened your mouth to respond, he chuckled and looked away at the cereals. “Don’t worry. You don’t have to talk to me. I just needed to get some Fruit Loops and figured I might as well say hi.” He placed the cereal in question into his basket and offered you one more friendly smile and a playful wave. “So, hi!”

“Hi,” you managed to drag out as you lifted your hand in a wave. 

With a chuckle, he turned and headed away to the next aisle. You thought you were free from him for the day. 

But alas: you found him again when you went to get eggs. He seemed to be contemplating between two brands. You tried your best to go unnoticed as you searched for your favourite local free range brand. To you dismay, he stood right in front of the eggs you seeked. 

“Excuse me,” you started and tapped his shoulder when he didn’t seem to notice.

He smiled upon recognising you. “Yeah?”

“Could you move? I want those eggs.”

“The expensive ones?” He raised an eyebrow and handed you a carton. “They’re almost triple the price of the store brand.”

“But they’re free range and locally sourced. You should try them,” you explained with the slightest bit of enthusiasm before placing eggs into your cart and walking away in the direction you thought him least likely to follow. 

You truly thought you were free of him when you went to the checkout, but once again, as if tasked by god himself to be wherever you went, Seokmin was in front of you in queue, meticulously placing his items on the counter. As he turned to put away his basket, his eyes found yours and a bright smile appeared on his face. “Oh, it’s you again!”

“It’s me again,” you replied with an awkward laugh. 

“Are you leaving too?” he wondered while fishing his bag for his wallet. When you nodded, his eyes lit up. “Do you need a ride home?”

Your eyes widened. “A ride?” 

Why was he offering you a ride home? Why was he so friendly with you at all? You had broken into his apartment – in the eyes of the legal system anyway – and he was smiling at you like you were a beloved friend. 

“Of course. We should stick together, no? We’re neighbours, after all– Hold on,” he interrupted himself to respond to the cashier, “Yes, by card please.Thank you.”

“You might have to wait a moment then,” you finally relented when he turned to you once again, eyes resembling a puppy. His smile widened at your words and he nodded. 

The ride home was short and awkward. You greatly feared he would try to retaliate for the emotional damage you might’ve caused by sleeping in his apartment. To your relief, he did not such thing and only continued cheerfully chattering.

“–but I feel like a dog would be too much work, you know? I love dogs but I don’t have that kind of time.” He offered you a glance. “Do you have any pets?”

You scrunched up your face in thought as the car rolled to a stop in the parking lot of the building. “I have a cactus.”

“... Does it have a name?”

Eager to not disappoint, you blurted out the first name that came to mind: “Bertha.” You shut your eyes in shame.

But as the two of you got out of his small red car, he laughed. “Bertha? Sounds lovely. Is she high-maintenance?”

“Very.”

“Yeah?”

You decided you liked his laughter and the bright smile that came with. “Easier than a dog though.”

He laughed louder at that and handed you your grocery bags. “I bet. Maybe I should get a cactus too.”

“I highly recommend,” you chuckled, finding his laughter contagious. “It’s very fulfilling to watch it do absolutely nothing all-year-round.”

When the two of you got into the hallway, he paused in front of the staircase. As you were about to ask him about it, he asked, “Do you need help with your bags?”

“No, I’m–”

“They look heavy.” He frowned before holding up a single finger, jogging over to his door, dropping his singular bag in front of it, and running back to you. Before you could formally protest, he grabbed the bags from your hands and began the journey up the stairs. When you froze in your spot, he turned to ask, “Well, aren’t you coming? Or were you going to sleep at mine again?”

Your face burned at the teasing comment. You decided following after him was the lesser evil. 

“There we go,” he cheered when the two of you reached your door. He rubbed his hands against his thighs a few times, awkwardly like a schoolboy, before smiling and waving goodbye. “I guess this is goodbye for the day. It was nice talking to you.”

You didn’t manage to even thank him before he was already halfway down the stairs. Maybe you made him as nervous as you made him. As you went to sleep that night, you replayed the interaction over and over again in your head, failing to hide a smile at the memory.

The valley of the mattress had a hold over you. You had never been so comfortable waking up – well, with the exception of maybe once or twice. 

The pillows were the perfect temperature, the blanket hugged you just right, the big teddy bear you hugged to your chest smelled fresh out of the washing machine– 

“Since when do I have a teddy bear?” you grumbled in confusion and pried your eyes open. You felt all blood rush away from your face as you looked at the bear – light brown with a baby blue bow, its eyes shining up at you. 

You had never even seen this bear before.

Cursing under your breath, you glanced around the room. You were back in your very own personal hell full of flowing beige curtains, white unfamiliar sheets, and teddy bears: the hell known as Seokmin’s apartment.

The realisation brought tears of frustration to your eyes, but you were too stubborn to let them loose. It was barely 8 am but you were already on the verge of crying – what a joke.

Wiping your eyes, you all but slammed the bear down on the bed (you’ll never admit you did feel a little bad about it seconds later and gave it a little pat on the head) and stood up. You stumbled out of the bedroom and towards the front door. 

As you reached for the doorknob – the final obstacle on your journey out of hell –, you heard his voice, sweet as honey like always, “Oh, you’re not going to stay for breakfast?”

You froze.

“I made extra waffles and all,” he added, sounding a little dejected. You didn’t have the heart to tell him no, so you sighed softly and turned around to give him a tight-lipped not-quite-genuine smile. His own grin brightened at the sight. “Is that a yes? You’ll stay?”

“Only for the waffles,” you lied and took a seat at his table. 

He laughed and placed a plate of fresh food in front of you before taking the seat across from you. “Not because you don’t want me to feel bad?”

“No,” you grabbed a fork and began filling it with food, “I just don’t like food waste.”

“Oh, right! Minghao said you work for an environmental company. That sounds cool.”

“Yeah?” You swallowed your food. “What about you? What do you do for work?”

He cleared his throat as though the question had caught him by surprise and he was too shy to say. After a moment of silence, he bashfully admitted, “I’m a music teacher at primary school.”

You blinked in surprise. “A music teacher?”

“Well, I wanted to be a singer– a musical actor, actually,” he explained, his voice fluctuating in volume and his ears bright red, “but I’m a little too shy to audition. So I just stuck with teaching others to sing.”

“That’s so cool though,” you told him with a smile. “Are you good at singing?”

His ears seemed to turn an even deeper red. “My friends think so but I don’t know. I think there’s still a lot of room for improvement.”

“Then why not audition? You only live once.”

He seemed thoughtful all of a sudden, watching your increasingly awkward self. You were just about ready to apologise for your possibly intrusive question when he softly asked, “Why not rest and live a little? You only live once, right?” 

The question felt awfully pointed and you didn’t fail to let him know with a glare. 

“I’m serious,” he declared, his lips pouting a little as if he was actually upset at your lack of self-care. “Whenever I see you, you’re always rushing somewhere. The only person you seem to be friends with is Sunny, and maybe Jeonghan by association.”

You opened your mouth to defend yourself. “I’m also friends with Minghao–”

“He barely even leaves his apartment. He doesn’t count.”

“He counts!”

“Do I count?”

“Of course you–” Your eyes widened as did his smile. 

“We’re friends now!” he declared while pointing an accusatory finger at you, his voice raising in excitement. You began to protest but he was having none of it. “No take-backs! We’re friends – you just said so!”

“I didn’t actually–”

“Nope. No. We’re friends.” He narrowed his eyes at you, his smile never fading. “Or do you just sleep in random guys’ beds?”

You wanted to protest, you really did, but there’s only so much you can say to defend yourself against such accusations. Besides, his bright smile at your defeated nod could’ve won awards.

Accidentally waking in his apartment didn’t end. No. In fact, it somehow got worse.

Once every week quickly turned into once every few days. You were tempted to start keeping track of how often you woke up in your own bed but one could assume the numbers wouldn’t be too impressive. 

You grew accustomed to the smell of his detergent and the smell of breakfast in the mornings. Was this what it might’ve been like to be in a relationship? 

“How come you’ve never dated anyone?” he wondered once over breakfast.

You shrugged. “I don’t have the time.”

“Too busy saving the world?” he teased like he often did. Over time you stopped finding it annoying (perhaps because he sounded almost genuinely proud of you every time he said it). 

“I assume you don’t get a lot of dates either,” you bit right back between bites of pancakes.

He seemed to be taken aback by your observation. “What makes you think that?”

“You sleep with a teddy bear, Seokmin,” you deadpanned. 

He pouted. “Fluffy is a premium sleep companion.”

You laughed. “Is he?”

“You steal him every other night!” he accused with a chuckle. “I’m sure you know how great he is by now.”

“He’s truly a– What did you say? A premium sleep companion?”

“That’s what the label said when I got him.”

“Maybe I should invest in a bear too,” you wondered thoughtfully between bites. 

Seokmin raised an eyebrow. “Then why don’t you?”

“No ti–”

“If you make the ‘no time’ excuse again, I will scream,” he said with in utmost seriousness. You promptly shut up: Seokmin’s lung capacity was well-known by everyone in the building.

After a moment of silence, he cleared his throat. “You know, if it’s physical contact that you need to sleep– Nevermind. How are the pancakes?”

Whether it was to save your or his dignity, you chose to ignore his first comment and answered only the last question, “Their colour is nicer than usual. I like the golden colour.”

“I guess the free range eggs really do make a difference,” Seokmin mused with a chuckle. When you offered him a surprised look, he hummed in confusion. “What?”

“You bought free range eggs? Didn’t you say they were too expensive last time?”

He shrugged. “I figured I might as well try to make some more ethical choices while shopping. Besides, you recommended them–”

Your eyes welled up a little. “You bought more expensive eggs because I recommended them?”

“And because I care for animals,” he added in a little too fast. 

You laughed and nodded. “For the animals, right. Me too.”

“Do you ever rest from your work?” he wondered after a moment. “What do you do outside of it?”

“I… don’t know. I read. I like to clean.”

“But what about going to festivals? Swimming? Cycling? Dancing?” He grew more and more desperate as you rejected every hobby he offered. “No wonder you’re so tired all of the time! You’re a workaholic.”

You snorted. “Sunny did say I’m similar to Jihoon.”

“I didn’t think it was this bad.”

“I think he’s worse though.”

“Oh, definitely, but he doesn’t go to sleep in his neighbours’ beds,” Seokmin pointed out with a look of worry. As he watched you for an exactly uncomfortable amount of time, his eyes eventually lit up again. “I have an idea. What are you doing tomorrow evening?”

“Working–”

“I swear if I hear that word one more time, I will scream.”

You, once again, promptly shut up. 

“Great,” he beamed and clapped his hands together, “I’ll text you to details later.”

“You’re not even going to tell me what we’re doing?”

You sighed in disappointment as he smiled brightly and shook his head ‘no’. 

A knock on your door notified you of his arrival. Despite being sure it wasn’t meant to be a date and knowing that Seokmin had seen you in far worse condition, you still took a deep breath and gave yourself a quick once-over at the mirror.

When you opened the door, he smiled at you brightly. “I see you’ve dressed up too.”

“I would hardly call this dressed up,” you told him rather sheepishly, suddenly even more aware of you appearance. “You look very dapper as well.”

“Yep, and do you want to know why?” 

“Why?”

His smile widened so much you worried for his cheeks. “Because you and I are going to the theatre.”

“The theatre?” You paled at the mention and looked down at your outfit. “I feel like I’m underdressed then.”

“You look fine,” he laughed and grabbed your hand. “Let’s go or we’ll be late. And trust me,” he widened his eyes for dramatic effect, “you don’t want to be late.”

You gave in begrudgingly and locked the door as fast as you could while he practically bounced at your side in excitement. 

“What are we going to watch then?” you finally remembered to ask when you entered the theatre less than 15 minutes later. “I swear, if you dragged me here to watch an opera–”

“It’s a musical, actually,” he admitted bashfully. “I love musicals and I don’t know much about other theatre performances so I thought– But if you don’t like musicals, that’s–”

“I don’t mind musicals,” you told him with a little laugh and pat on his shoulder. “But I have to admit, it has been ages since my last time at the theatre, and I haven’t seen a musical in a few years at least.”

“That’s fine. I’ll guide you through it.” And as if the last shy bone had left his body, he grabbed your hand and led you to your seats, all the while widely smiling at you and giving your hand periodical squeezes of encouragement. 

His hand never left yours for the duration of the musical, not even for intermission, not even when he ordered cake from the theatre café to hold you over until after the show. His hand remained warm in yours, fingers squeezing a little tighter every once in a while, his thumb running over the back of your hand. 

It was so warm, so comforting. Just his presence alone was enough to make you dizzy with the feeling of safety and happiness. His touch? You were floating on cloud 9 with zero regard for what was going on below – or on the stage, for that matter.

Frankly, you could barely remember to watch the musical because you were so busy marvelling at the feel of his hand in yours. 

“That was so good,” he excitedly told you as the two of you returned to your apartment. “The music was phenomenal.”

“The actors were very good.” And that was the only contribution you could make to the conversation because you definitely hadn’t paid any attention to the plot and your knowledge of music was simply not there.

But thankfully, that seemed to be far more than enough. His eyes gleamed as he sat onto your sofa and gestured widely while speaking, “Right? The leading woman was just– Incredible, fantastic. Her range! I’m a little jealous, actually.”

You took the seat next to him. To your surprise, his hand found yours once again, wasting no time in interlocking your fingers. And just like that, paying attention to anything else became difficult. 

Were you really developing a crush on him? Just like that? You refused. You were too busy to be pining after a man. 

But when slid closer to your side and looked at you like you were the most wonderful person to ever exist, you suddenly didn’t care about the lack of time. Screw it. You’d make time if it meant you got to see his star-filled eyes again. 

“... Sorry, what?” you coughed out when he paused and looked at you expectantly.

He laughed. “You’re so cute. I asked if you wanted to go see another musical with me someday.”

“I’d love to,” you blurted out without thinking. 

Yeah. Screw deadlines. 

“Okay, perfect!” His smile brightened up the entire room as he rested his head on your shoulder. “Because I heard they’re doing Excalibur next season and I desperately need a friend to go watch it with me. I saw the premise and heard a preview of one of the songs and they’re holding auditions next month and I am already obsessed–”

Your brain was barely functioning at all, and yet you could recall one single memory from the depths of it. A dream he had shared. “Then why don’t you audition?”

He sat up abruptly, looking at you as if you were insane. “I couldn’t possibly–”

“Why not?” you asked. “I heard you singing the other day. You’re really good. I think you could get any part pretty easily.”

His ears turned more red with every word you said. “You flatter me…”

“I’m serious, Seokmin!”

“I’m not that good. And I have zero acting experience, aside from a few courses I did in college. Why would they ever pick me?”

“Why wouldn’t they?” you countered and he scoffed.

“I can think of a few–”

“You never know if you don’t try,” you told him and raised your hand to brush a stray hair off his forehead. “I’m rooting for you.”

As your words faded into the night and your eyes met, you wondered if he could feel the sparks flying and bursting all around you as well. Did he also feel that overwhelming adoration for you? 

He sighed after a while, a bashful smile on his face. “You must be tired. It’s been a long night. Go to sleep.”

“I really should,” you yawned as if on cue. You shared a laugh at the timing.

He squeezed your hand one last time. “Well, good night then. I expect I’ll find you at my apartment in the morning–”

“Or you could stay here and we don’t have to worry about that,” you blurted without thinking. Your face flashed hot right after. 

Had there been any alcohol in that cake he bought for you? Why were you feeling so bold all of a sudden? 

“I–” He seemed speechless.

“I don’t know why I said that,” you rushed out and avoided his eyes. “I think I’m just really tired and work has been stressful and maybe my brain is just broke–”

He placed his hand behind your neck and led your head to rest against his chest as he rubbed comforting circles on your back. You could hear his body rumble with laughter as he held you. “I’d love to stay over. Besides,” he pushed you away just enough to look you in the eyes again, “I think it’s only fair that I get to sleep over this once, because you sleep over at my place a lot.”

You frowned and pouted. “It’s not like I mean to–”

“A lot,” he repeated with wide eyes and a teasing smile before pressing a soft kiss to your forehead. “But it’s okay. I don’t mind.”

When you recounted the half-embarrassing and yet half-lovestruck happenings of the previous night to Sunny on the way back from work, she stared at you in bafflement.

“You actually asked him to sleep over?” she gasped, hand over her heart as if she was a peasant woman of the 16th century hearing the most scandalous gossip. “You little vixen!”

“Nothing happened,” you insistently told her as the two of you stepped off the bus.

She huffed. “That’s honestly so boring. I mean, have you seen that man? What I wouldn’t give to–”

“I am once again reminding you that you already have a boyfriend.”

“You don’t know what we’re into in the bedroom,” she countered with a smirk.

You only now realised how much Jeonghan was rubbing off on her. She was becoming a second him, slowly but surely. Couple of the year.

“I’m taking away your friend privileges, Sunny,” you told her at that and rushed ahead to avoid hearing any more weirdly Jeonghan-like jokes from her. 

She laughed at that before running after you. “Okay, okay, no more dirty jokes.”

“Thank god,” you sighed towards the sky.

“So, did any sleepwalking occur?” she then asked before humming in thought. “Well, I imagine if it had, I would’ve heard about it by now. It would’ve been quite a sight to see Seokmin running after an asleep you towards his apartment at 2 am.”

“I didn’t sleepwalk.” 

And frankly, if you had, Seokmin must have done a very good job of getting you back to your own bed because you woke up exactly how and where you fell asleep – wrapped in his arms, head resting in the crook of his neck. 

Sunny suddenly stopped in spot. Her eyes wide, her lips parted. She pointed an accusatory finger at you, “Wait, does that mean you two are dating now?”

You weren’t sure you had the answer. And you wouldn’t have time to find the answer for a while.

“Good morning!” you heard Seokmin’s voice before you even opened your eyes.

Unlike the previous few times, disappointment filled you as realisation hit. You groaned and turned over to bury your face in his numerous pillows, hoping you could suffocate yourself out of a mildly infuriating nightmare.

Seokmin clicked his tongue. “Not quite the greeting I was expecting, especially considering I was greeted with a hug the last time we shared a bed.”

“Shut it.”

“Oh, you’re mean today.”

“Did I fall asleep mid-work again?” you sighed and slowly sat up to glare at nothing in particular. Seokmin went to great lengths to avoid whatever direction to directed your deadly look to. “God, I bet I didn’t even make it to the second graph– I’m not gonna have time to go to the office for work today.”

He stared at you curiously. “So, work from home? I mean, if you have the possibility.”

“Yeah, but then I’ll get distracted and then I still won’t end up doing anything,” you whined before falling back into the pillows. You wanted to cry just at the thought of that stupid report waiting on your idle laptop. 

“Why are you so stressed about this report anyway? I don’t think you were ever this upset over any other reports.”

“If this project report goes through, and we pull off this project – which I still have to plan, oh my god, I am so far behind–”

Seokmin laughed at your frantic movements and moved over to place his hands on your shoulders and keep you still. “Hey, hey, don’t get distracted. If the project goes through…?”

You took a deep breath. “If the project goes well, I will get a promotion. Less hours, better pay.” You sighed. “Then maybe I’ll be able to get a dog like I’ve always wanted.”

“That sounds wonderful! We should celebrate with breakfast,” he suggested with a wiggle of his eyebrows. 

But as tempting as it sounded, you simply didn’t have any time to chat. You had work to do. And so, you stood up, fixed your hair, gave Seokmin an affectionate yet half-hearted pat on the back and headed for the door. 

You couldn’t wait to spend your day in complete lonely misery. At work you at least had friends to talk between sections. All you had in your apartment was Bertha and instant coffee.

And it was as if Seokmin knew it just from the way you spoke to him that morning. 

When the clock struck twelve, you heard a timid knock on your door. Confused at the noise and a little disoriented from the five pages of words you had written, you stood up and went to the door. 

Your heart grew three sizes when you saw him standing there, looking so awfully huggable in his large white hoodie and grey sweatpants, glasses on his nose accompanied by a kind smile. You were so surprised to find him there that you failed to consider why he came. 

He had to nudge you with the plastic bag he was holding for you to even notice it.

“Sorry,” you stammered and stepped aside to let him in, “I’m just a little-”

“Stress? Overworked? Confused because you’ve been staring at a 15-inch screen for the past three hours?” he suggested and brought the bag to the kitchen. “That’s okay. Don’t even mind me.” He smiled as he nodded towards your laptop. “Go on. Work waits. The sooner you get to it, the sooner it’ll be done.”

Disoriented as you were, you didn’t dare argue and slowly walked back to your previous seat at the coffee table, all the while watching him cautiously. 

As your fingers landed on the keyboard, he began lifting things out of the bag. You watched in awe as he stacked snacks and vegetables onto the counter. 

Feeling your eyes on him, he lifted his head to glare at you. “Work.”

“Work,” you repeated on instinct and turned back to your laptop. He laughed a little at your robotic tone. 

Some 20 minutes later, you felt a presence next to you. When you turned to face it, Seokmin was holding an fruit slice up at your lips. 

“Eat,” he told you softly. You did as told.

“What are you doing?” you asked between confused laughter and chewing. Your eyes landed on the bowl of fruits he had placed in front of you. 

He shrugged. “Taking care of you. You seemed so upset this morning… I thought it would be nice to spend my free day helping you.”

Your eyes widened. “It’s your free day? And you’re here? You should be resting!”

“Watching you is all the rest I need,” he winked playfully before lifting another fruit to your lips. “Now, eat up. This is lunch. I’ll make something better for dinner.”

“You don’t have to–” 

He took this chance to shove a piece of apple into your mouth, effectively interrupting your speech. “I will, and I don’t care what you say.”

He glanced around the apartment as you began to eat the fruits on your own. “When was the last time you opened a window?”

You watched curiously as he stood up (with a groan because his bones simply weren’t as nimble as they used to be) and headed over to the windows, opening a few to air out the room. As he did so, he told you, “They say that good airflow and fresh air help the thought process. We air out the classrooms between every lesson so the next students won’t get too tired.”

“I don’t think I’ve opened any windows in here since I first moved in,” you confessed before turning back to your laptop. Before you could your train of thought again, a soft fabric was placed on your shoulders. You looked up to find him smiling at you brightly. “So you won’t get cold.”

“What about you then?”

He shrugged and winked. “I’ll just consider this my daily walk in the park.” He then looked around the apartment again, as if looking for something to do. You couldn’t help but find it endearing. 

“Maybe… you could… make me a cup of tea?” you suggested.

He lit up at the idea. “Coming right up!”

Before heading to the kitchen, he leaned down to press a kiss to your forehead. It seemed almost like a reflex – like he didn’t even need to think about doing it. 

Relishing in the leftover warmth of his lips and the feel of his hoodie on your skin, your work took a backseat for a while. Instead of thinking about your project of a lifetime, your brain was drowning in one singular question. You glanced towards the kitchen to watch him, a smile appearing on your face as you did. 

“Seokmin?” you called out softly after a moment. 

He hummed in response immediately, eyes lifting from the cup he was preparing so he could offer you an encouraging smile. 

You took a deep breath. “What are we?”

He paused. “What do you mean?”

“You and I. What are we to each other?” you wondered, unable to look away from him. There was something you badly wanted to hear him say and yet feared at the same time. “What are you to me?”

The corners of his lips twitched. “I… I’ll be whatever you’d like me to be.”

“Whatever? A friend?”

“If that’s what you wish,” he breathed out, a little shakier than before.

“What about a lover?”

He smiled. “If you so wish.”

“Then… what do you want me to be?” you asked him quietly, a part of you praying your words would go missing in the incoming wind before they reached him. 

“I just…” He bit his lip in contemplation, ears turning red, and avoided your eyes.

“What do you want me to be to you, Seokmin?” you repeated your question, a little bolder this time, hope sparking in your heart.

He looked up again, into your eyes. “Mine.” You let out a breath – of relief or fear, you weren’t sure – but he didn’t hesitate when he repeated, “I want you to be mine.”

You felt guilty for the words you’d utter next. “But we don’t have the time for that…”

“That’s okay,” he assured you with a kind smile. “We’ll take it slow.”

“Slow? How slow do we take it?”

“As slow as you need. I’m not leaving.”

“I signed up for the auditions,” he told you over breakfast a few days later. “Jihoon’s helping me prepare.”

You were still neck-deep in your project, struggling to meet the deadlines and coordinate your team. This seemed to lead the asleep you to Seokmin’s apartment more often than not. It was almost like you woke up in his bed every morning now. 

But even in your despair, you couldn’t help but be excited for Seokmin.

Your eyes lit up and a squeal came out as you grabbed his hand over the table. “Really? You did?!”

He used his free hand to rub the back of his neck bashfully. “Well, you said I should give it a try, right? Who knows,” he shrugged, trying his best to seem nonchalant or even fake a little bit of confidence, “maybe they’ll give me a part.”

“I’m sure they will,” you insisted, squeezing his hand. “Your voice is amazing and you’re so handsome – the ladies are going to swoon when they see you on the stage.”

He laughed. “Will you be one of those ladies?”

“I’ll be in the front row,” you solemnly promised. “At every show. You’ll get sick of seeing me.”

“I could never,” he assured you.

Seokmin’s audition would take place two weeks later. You made sure the mark the day with a big red circle on your calendar – on all three of them, in fact. And now it was time.

Between your seemingly endless stream of project complications and Seokmin’s daytime job and audition preparations, you barely saw him. If it weren’t for your persistent sleepwalking problem, you wouldn’t have seen him at all. And so, the curse had became a blessing. 

“You’ll do great,” you assured him minutes after waking up in his bed. You made sure to give him the warmest hug before letting him leave the room. “I believe in you. And so does Jihoon, apparently.”

Seokmin pouted. “Did he say that or are you lying to make me feel better?”

“We talked yesterday,” you told him, appalled that he’d even accuse you of such atrocities. “He said he has complete faith that you’ll do well.”

“I don’t believe you but–”

“Do you want to fight me? Already?” You raised a brow and he shook his head immediately. “Exactly. Just accept the compliment. And don’t forget to call me when you finish, okay?”

“Of course,” he promised.

He kept that promise. Just as he stepped out of the theatre, his shaky hands picked up the phone and chose your number. 

You answered the call with prep in your voice. It had been a good day so far and you were expecting to hear his no-doubt joyous retellings of the audition.

What you weren’t expecting was: “Can you come get me? I think I might cry.”

“Why, why?” Despite your words, you didn’t hesitate to slam your laptop closed and grab your jacket. “Are you okay? Were they mean?”

“They weren’t mean,” he mumbled on the other side of the line, “but I don’t think I did well.”

“I’m sure you did wonderful,” you spoke while rushing down the street. Thankfully, the theatre was barely a five-minute walk from your office – half that at your current pace. “You’re just putting yourself down over nothing.”

Seokmin whined. “You’re seriously overestimating me.”

“Don’t be silly.”

“No, I’m serious. You overestimate me.”

As you crossed the street, you noticed a familiar figure dragging his feet along the pavement, head low and shoulders slumped. “Now why would I do that?”

“Because you like me a little more than you should,” he suggested while kicking a pebble. You could already hear his voice even without the phone. “I’m sure the directors think I’m a joke or something. God, I am so–”

“Don’t you dare say another bad word about yourself,” you scolded him with a gentle slap against the back of his head. 

He stared at you in bewilderment – both from the fact that you might as well have appeared from thin air and the fact that you just did that. 

But you were unrelenting in your affection for him. “Lee Seokmin, listen to me: you did absolutely great. You did your best. And even if you don’t get a part this time, they’ll value the fact that you now have experience with auditions. Take it in stride.”

Tears gathered in his eyes. Before long, he pulled you into his embrace, holding you impossibly tight. “You’re just saying that… Thank you.”

“That’s what I’m here for, silly,” you laughed and hugged him back just as tightly. “I think we should celebrate this occasion.”

“Even if I screwed up and don’t get the part?”

You scoffed. “Absolutely! A little cake can make everything better, no?”

He sighed. “I don’t think I can eat right now. I might throw up from the nerves.”

“Drink then?”

He contemplated and then straightened up. “I could go for some bubble tea…”

“There we go!” you cheered and gently pinched his cheeks, prompting a small giggle. “My treat because you did so well today and I’m so proud of you.”

This time it was you who grabbed his hand without any hesitation, more than happy to reassuringly squeeze it as you walked and talked. 

“When will you get the answer?” you wondered.

He sucked in a breath. “In about a week, they said. Or maybe never–”

“Seokmin,” you scolded.

“In a week,” he corrected himself with some enthusiasm. “I’ll get answers in a week. And then I might actually cry.”

“And I’ll be there when you cry tears of joy, darling.”

“Tears of joy?” He raised a brow and smiled in disbelief. “You seriously put too much faith in me.”

You nudged his side. “As if you haven’t been equally supportive about my promotion.”

“Oh, right,” Seokmin gasped, “won’t your promotion interview be in a week too?”

You would’ve preferred he didn’t remind you. Then again, you guessed it was only fair. 

“Will you come over to hold me when I cry too?”

“Tears of joy?” he teased and leaned over to kiss your temple. “I’ll be just a call away.”

The week somehow passed at both the pace of a snail and the pace of Junhui on a sugar rush. 

After finding you in his bed every single morning, Seokmin resorted to just sleeping over at your place, tightly cuddling you to keep you in place. He now had a whole drawer dedicated to his things in your bedroom. 

The day started okay. You were awoken not by a loud alarm like you had expected, but by Seokmin gently singing you awake. 

For a moment, you thought you had died and gone straight to heaven – maybe working so hard to save the environment had paid off after all, you thought. But no, it was just your reality. 

What a beautiful reality. You couldn’t help but smile as you cuddled into his chest.

“If you keep clinging onto me like that, I won’t be able to make my famous waffles for a lucky breakfast,” he whispered but made no attempt to push you away. 

The delicious breakfast was followed by an encouraging hug on the way out of the building, him to the school and you to the office. You wore a smile the entire time.

Up until you made it to your desk. Then the reality began sinking in. 

This was the day that could make or break your career. The day you had worked so hard for that you neglected your private life for so many years.

As the clock on the wall slowly ticked forward, your hands began to shake. Your throat was dry. Your head was fuzzy, full of nothing but anxiety. If someone had asked you about anything, you would’ve only been able to stare at them with a mouth wide open.

20 minutes until your scheduled interview. You were starting to feel sick. 

When another colleague came to give you a supportive pat on the back, you excused yourself and grabbed your phone to rush outside to the balcony. You sat on a chair and willed yourself to take deep breaths as you tapped on his number.

You wanted to slap yourself when you realised that you hadn’t even bothered to check if he was on break yet.

But he answered on the first ring. “Hey, what’s up? Did you have the interview alread–”

“Seokmin, I can’t do this,” you whimpered into the microphone. “I can’t do this. They’re gonna realise I’m an idiot and they’ll fire me and–”

“Woah, woah, what happened to your positive can-do attitude?” he wondered. “You’ll be fine.”

“No–”

“(Y/n),” he said your voice so firmly that your breath got caught in your throat. “(Y/n), you will be fine. You’ve worked there for so many years, you’ve achieved so many things. If they wanted to fire you, they would’ve done that by now.”

You took a shaky breath. “What if it’s an elaborate prank?”

“Why would– Baby, listen to me. You’ve worked hard. You put everything you had into that project – I was there, I saw it. You and your ideas are invaluable to your company. They’re going to ask you a few questions as a formality and they’re going to give that promotion and then you and I are going to go to a celebratory dinner and it’ll all be over.”

“And I can get a dog?” you whispered, a small smile tugging at your lips.

“You can get two dogs if you want, baby,” he laughed. “You deserve it. Don’t underestimate yourself. I believe in you and I’m sure your co-workers do as well.”

“How do you always know the right words to say?”

He laughed once again. “Baby, I’m a teacher. I’m literally trained to comfort people. I’m just glad I’m able to comfort you as well.”

“Thank you.”

“No need,” he responded, “just go and ace that interview. Okay?”

“And then you’ll come and wipe my happy tears?”

“You already know the answer to that question. But I expect the same treatment when I get my audition results.”

“Will do.”

“Go and get them, tiger.”

You weren’t sure what it was, but something about the conversation seemed to have lifted the weight off your shoulders. When you walked back to the office, the upcoming interview no longer felt as taunting. 

As the clock hit 2 pm, you squared your shoulders, took a deep breath and headed to your manager’s office.

When the day ended, you found Seokmin standing in front of the office building, a blinding smile on his face. 

“Well?” he asked expectantly, though the look in his eyes said that he had every faith that you would only give him good news. You were glad to prove him right. 

Your coy smile was replaced with joyous laughter as you ran to hug him and called out, “I got the job!”

“You got it? You got it!” he cheered with you, jumping up and down with you in his arms, not far from spinning you around in the air. “I knew you would! What did I tell you? Silly you,” he let you out of his hold to place his hands on your cheeks and pull your face closer to his own, “you thought you wouldn’t get the promotion. Look at you now. I’m so proud of you.”

You breathed out in relief. The smile seemed to never stop tugging on your cheeks. “I’m so relieved I could cry.”

“Then who will dry my happy tears?” he teased with a bright smile.

You tilted your head in confusion. “Wait–”

“I got the part,” he whispered, his smile only growing wider, eyes sparkling. “I’m going to become a musical actor, officially.”

“Oh my god!” you practically squealed and now it was your turn to hug him and jump. He was glad to join you, laughing in glee. “I knew you could do it! I knew it!”

As joy got the best of you – and who could blame you: this was the happiest day of your life so far –, you grabbed his face and pulled him closer to you to press your lips against his own. He melted into the gesture, arms wrapping around you tighter as if to will the moment to last forever. 

When you pulled back, just enough so that your noses touched, he laughed in disbelief. “I thought we were supposed to take it slow?”

“Screw taking it slow,” you whispered and kissed him again. “Might as well make it a triple celebration.”

“I like the sound of that.”

BONUS !

While practically leaning out of their open window to watch you and Seokmin kiss under the streetlights on your way home, Jeonghan and Sunny argued.

“I told you they would get together,” Sunny declared, her eyebrows raised as if to dare her boyfriend to prove her wrong. 

Jeonghan scoffed. “Please. They’re just kissing. It could be casual.”

“Just say you don’t want to owe me 20 bucks.”

“I don’t owe you 20 bucks! We have no confirmation!”

“Jeonghan, listen here–”

“No, no, you listen–”

“Both of you listen here!” Chan bellowed from the window above them. “If you don’t stop arguing right now, I will report you both to Jihoon’s parents! Some of us are trying to sleep!” Silence followed. “And pay her the 20 bucks, Jeonghan. They’re clearly together.”

Jeonghan grumbled and glared upwards before fishing a 20 out of his pocket and handing it to his smiling girlfriend.