#not with this rejected person clearly
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time to accept that I'm upset about the fact "its OK if you just want to be friends" is empty words. that's not going to happen!! & i can never go back to the society we met in because it'll just be awkward! without us EVER dating (unless we were and I wasn't aware of it). so sick of not understanding this stuff i wish it was simple and clear
#i'm so so tired i just like to make friends#and i thought i had one#when this guy messaged me asking if i was alright#after i didnt show up to a society for ages#i thought he was checking for the sake of checking#and i appreciated that because i was not alright#but he said he messaged me because he realised he needed to be proactive in finding a partner#and he thought i was pretty.#ok thanks but i want to be cared about outside of romantic intent#like i would worry for him and care about him#as someone i trust whose company i enjoy#but that wasn't the intent. and now there will be nothing#i'm so tired i hate this#asked my friend just now how it feels to be in love#or romantically attracted to someone#and she could not give a clear answer#despite having felt it before#but by the way she describes it. i tick all the boxes#not with this rejected person clearly#idk. i may not be capable. im so tired of it being everywhere#i wish i could message that friend i made at a social last year#who i had such a good time with#but he tried to kiss me then and he's got a girlfriend now#so it would be wrong#according to rules i don't understand#rant over#i am not sober which was such a mistake#because now i am alone and sad about lost friends who apparently felt something i did not#so that means we have to pretend like we mean nothing to each other#is it the autism. fr. i don't understand
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oooh wait so the plot hole of “why doesnt a spirit medium just channel the victims spirit” is literally bc the DL-6 spirit channeling cant be repeated huh
#im so fucking slow I was brushing my teeth thinking abt Gregory edgeworth in mayas clothes#and I haven’t played aa1 so I don’t actually know the details of it in case I get to play it for myself#but they brought up the spirit channeling mistake with misty and how it basically shot down the kurain techniques credibility right#and like. I guess trying to do that again would be a repeat of that incident which ended up with an innocent person being convicted#so Phoenix not only has to channel Mia because she’s the smarter better lawyer but also because summoning the victim#isnt exactly the first time it’s happened and gotten someone the guilty verdict. huh#replaying justice for all 2-4 so the case with Maya spirit channeling#and after playing aa3 I can really appreciate how much thought they put into the fey family and how a lot of the games events#revolve around it.#Mayas powers arent a ‘long lost ancestor’ as an excuse for her having powers. it is clearly and heavily expanded on#and the infighting makes so much sense when you consider the power differences between branch and main families.. and Mia becoming a lawyer#to find out what happened to her mother AND after being aware of that bloodshed and what it means for Maya#the way she chose Maya and didn’t want that for them. the way she put distance between them on purpose so they wouldn’t become like that#and Pearl is acknowledged as having more power than Maya but she’s fucking eight and loves Maya that she doesn’t see that as any#kind of power imbalance. heck when Morgan uses her for her plan in bridge to the turnabout Pearl was happy to do it#because Morgan said it was for pearls good and Pearl assumed that meant it would be good for Maya too and I 😭😭#the branch system was originally made so that even if you weren’t chosen as the master you could still support the family by protecting the#main branch. and the irony of that being the reason why main family members are targeted to be usurped#iris outright rejecting the notion of communicating to the dead and everything the fey clan stands for#there’s so much fucking lore to this and I don’t see it talked abt enough?????????!?????#yapping#ace attorney#as
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similar cinematographic choices to portray the same imagery with insanely different circumstantial contexts
#like being tricked into a room and locked off from the outside world with a pitcher of water‚ a waste bucket‚ and an army cot#as you slowly died while experiencing acute mental distress to the point of having a psychogenic seizure at the same time#that people discussed your fate as if it were a decision they had the authority to make (and they DO. unfortunately for you)#vs being tied to chair during which you're in pretty consistent communication and under the care of the person who put you there#and you're narratively given the opportunity to hunt this person down and you even have scenes with hand to hand combat#in which you're able to properly defend yourself. for the other person the idea of your life being in danger is carefully threaded risk#to be taken rather than (as per the previous circumstance described) a decision you have the authority to make#likeee i remember reblogging this post that ssid 'supernatural doesn't really have a concept of jail' but like absolutely yes it does#sam (and even other characters like mary and rowena) are both put in 'jail' as the direct effect to a fault#wrt the winchester familial dynamic and their role. it's one of the main differences here. sam is put in jail‚ dean is not#sam does not have the authority to put him there. it doesn't help that sam is literally pleading as the victim within his scene#while dean is able to victimise sam even as the monstrous body within the 10.03 scene#and the thing is that their identities are being compartmentalised in similar ways here. dean is attempting to save his sammy#from the encroaching (invariable) monstrous sam that which he spends the next season attempting to forgive for the shortcoming#of dean perceiving sam's efforts at independence as abandonment while sam is attempting to save his dean from the encroaching mark of cain#(chosen to be put there yet is still victimised by) and sam spends the rest of the season forgiving him over and over while even#taking misattributed responsibility and blame that which has to be made up for#4.21#10.03#se referat#edit: also adding onto chii's tags wrt the differences in capacity for consent regarding demon!dean#it's so interesting to compare demon!dean to soulless!sam in that demon!dean didn't have the capacity to reject competent!dean's consent#while both soulless!sam and 5.22!sam did not consent to be resouled in respectively active and precedingly passive ways#like 6.12 sam is clearly happy and grateful to have been resurrected and he doesn't even have any specific qualms#about dean keeping information relating to his ressurection from him but 5.22 explicitly made his consent‚ or lack thereof‚ regarding#ressurection clear unlike dean in early-s10... and the thing is that the last time sam didn't pursue dean's ressurection#he faced negative consequences for that decision! and yet dean is seen as objectively correct for his actions in s6#by both the audience and narrative‚ and much of his responsibility regarding sam's psychosis isn't acknowledged as directly related#to his actions vs the pinning of blame to much of early-s10 onto sam esp relating to the guy he had summon a demon‚ who sold his own soul#despite sam's advice‚ whom demon!dean killed
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honestly, i am so glad that a piece of media is finally exploring the unrequited love trope appropriately. everyone always romantisises the shit out of it and talks about how sad and tragic it is, but in reality the idea of someone who has clearly been rejected pining after someone else for years is just uncomfortable and selfish. moving on is the only appropriate response to a situation like this. while, by the way, continuing to actively pursue the other person, especially when they are exclusively involved with someone else, is the most inappropriate one.
#to be clear i do not mean like mutual pining supposedly unrequited love situations where the person hasn't been rejected and just assumes#that the other person doesnt feel the same because of self esteem issues etc etc#i mean when someone clearly does not recirprocate but the other person just continues on obsessing over them#only friends the series#ofts#archer watches ofts#ofts: ep 4
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everytime i feel bad and stressed about my life i remember that i might be in a troubling situation and having a bad time but im not season 4 fiona gallagher in the clink after leaving crack on the counter which my 3 year old baby brother happened to ingest resulting in a fatal near-death experience thats wracked me with never-ending guilt and forever altered my life
#this storyline was stupid you expect me to believe two-apples-tall liam gallagher came close to the crack AND managed to ingest it?#the crack which is lined up on the kitchen counter?#Also i don't believe that fiona would be irresponsible enough for liam to have been able to be close to the crack#that was an ooc moment and not like “its ooc cause thats the point shes going thru a tough time”#morelike “so ooc that it seems like a discrepancy that was overlooked for the sake of drama and shock value#as an older sister i feel like being watchful of your younger sibling if crack is in their general vicinity is an unstoppable instinct#its just not a plausible situation sorry like this is coming from someone who wholeheartedly embraces the realistic idea#of fiona falling short sometimes and being very human by struggling to consistently maintain her doting attentiveness#but anyways it's complicated cause Fiona clearly put it somewhere he cant reach#so how did he get access to it????#its like getting mad at a parent for putting a glass of wine on the counter#not comparing that to literal cocaine obviously this whole situation was nonetheless messed up#but just for some perspective... the writers were clearly doing cocaine themselves if they thought that#liam was bungee-jumping onto the counter and showing off his skills as an apparent budding olympics gymnast#not justifying anything but. listen.#the fact that it was on the counter FOR A REASONNN shows that fiona was careful to keep it out of reach and NOT do something insane like#putting it on the table#liam somehow magically having access to it defeats the purpose of it being on the counter.#if they really wanted for it to be believable that liam managed to snort it they should've put it on the table#but we already know that situation wouldn't be believable in its entirety cause we know that fiona would literally never leave it there#WHICH IS MY POINT. LIKE THIS SITUATION IS JUST ANNOYINGLY UNBELIEVABLE. FIONA WOULD NOT DO THIS AND HOW DID LIAM EVEN GET TO IT??#theres like 39482939 overlooked discrepancies just for the sake of getting to the shock#just to circle back Fiona would literally never let liam go near crack no matter how far gone and fucked up she was#I KNOW THIS BECAUSE I AM AN OLDER SISTER.#its just so UGHHHHH anyways obviously i still think in canon yeah Fiona was at fault shouldve been more careful and watchful#no matter how you look at it its clear that a risk like this just cannot be taken and she had to be blamed to an extent#but me personally? i reject it because it didnt feel natural to me at all there were 394939 other ways to frame a Fiona downfall#And i loved all the other ways her spiral was shown like getting messed up and ending up in Sheboygan#all the shit she got into with robbie + the impulsive urge to ruin the good thing she had going with mike#so human and believable and deeply flawed unlike the liam situation which was horrifically OOC and unrealistic
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all the lyrics across Taylor’s past 5 albums about how she hopes she doesn’t lose him (hopes he doesn’t leave, hopes it never ends) only to arrive at her saying “you’re losing me.”
#the moment where it shifts in any relationship#where it goes from this fear of losing something to realizing that the loss is inevitable beCAUSE a person doesn’t want you#like. in a way her fears didn’t come true. because she didn’t do the losing.#it’s not like she had perfect happiness and it was just suddenly ripped away. it can’t be that no matter what people say#which was the fear#the absolute strangled fear in Cornelia street#because the coldness was there first and the distance and the apathy. and then it’s not about being left and feeling rejected#it’s about seeing the truth and saying oh. you’re losing ME. Because you don’t WANT this#idk if this makes sense but it is such a real life distinction to me#the difference between fears and reality#and of course that doesn’t mean it isn’t also a loss and a blow (a huge one) for her too#but it’s still not I wake up screaming from dreaming one day I’ll watch as you’re leaving#cause you got tired of my scheming#where the burden rests on her for the loss. as in the failure was innately in her#because you’re losing me still has ‘don’t read the last page cause I stay’ written on all over it#but then it’s seeing clearly too—you don’t want this enough to stay#this Probably makes no sense#it’s just exactly how heartbreak happens in real times which is. Yeah exactly what’s happening#the whole thing makes me so sad
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she's so arrogant and annoying and hot it pisses me off !!!
#like have some shame omg . have some respect#shes soooo certain i will date her she keeps saying shes not worried she doesnt care etc etc bc she knows i want to date her#not even that. she Declared we were dating. like when i was like do u even want this. not just going on dates but acc dating. and she was#like wdym? im already dating you . like ok??? i wasnt informed ig#anyway i said she was arrogant and she said she knows so.#also she did several things when she was drunk that i found cringe/i personally would b embarrassed if i was her but she just found it funn#like genuinely does she have no sense of shame#also her reasoning is that shes too hot to be rejected and since im talking to her instead of... not that makes her certain that#no matter what i say i wont reject her#WHICH MAKES ME WANT TO REJECT HER. DONT TELL ME WHAT I WANT OR WHAT TO DO. UGH.#I WANT TO FIGHT HER FR MEIN GOTT#also i want her to be more romantic i literally told her im not asking her out on the next date lmao#also if we do end up dating properly i have to swear and oath never to argue w her and just communicate slowly and clearly bc imagine#lawyer and philosophy student get into an argument and theyre both scorpios. insane combination imo#INSUFFERABLE. she was also 40 mins late and tbf she did warn me and keep me updated but i was still rly mad at her bc#i was waiting for so long . and i was like . listen im gonna leave. and she walked thru the door. but anyway she apologised but also she#said no ones ever threatened to leave her b4. what do you mean before?? anyway i told her to respect my time more and she was like i cant#believe im being told off by a 21 yr old like bitch ur literally 24 stop acting ancient fuck off#UGH SHES SO IRRITATING. WHY DOESNT SHE CALL ME MORE.#crushposting
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Ig sort of my thesis for the sum total gender discourse within PH is it mostly comes off as very off the cuff
#logxx#Aside from the obvious exceptions most of the stuff it ends up saying about gender or sexuality comes off as like#Bc the author clearly thinks abt these subjects a lot and has very complicated feelings abt them#Her work (which comes off as strongly influenced by personal history and introspection) ends up making statements abt gender#But the work overall* doesn't come off as deliberately feminist or anything As Such#(* VnC comes off as a lot more deliberate which makes sense)#Saw post talking about how The Fact of Relationships is moralized in PH and my grievance w it is like#You're not wrong but ''Loving Someone is morally neutral'' is kind of the least interesting analysis of that topic#Mostly bc I don't think PH rly attempts to reject any alternative hypothesis#And even goes so far as to parody like. Conventional heteronormative depictions of the subject#PH *IS* interested in the fact of loving other people but not rly in the morality of the action itself#And in general is more interested in how power dynamics affect relationships including between people who love each other
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pmd chatot for blorbo bingo? ^^
He's a silly rabbit. I love him
#anonymous#wondermail#tbh w chatot i think ppl jump from one extreme to the other of either 'horrible capitalist'#or 'genuinely plans everything out to test people's faith and is Always Trusting And Good W Protags'#but i think there's more nuance to it than that#he does make mistakes! and he laughs nervously and tries too hard to cover it up and that's why i love him honestly#like when wigglytuff says chatot clearly believed hero and partner all along i think he was trying to give him an out#and chatot could tell and gratefully took that#he's flawed and that's okay!!!! it doesn't make him any less passionate or caring#he's just the head of intelligence and trying to run w what he thinks is logical#anyway. love this disaster birb. will fight ppl who make hating him their personality. (except eots hero bc their dynamic is awesome)#*dives back in w more tags* OKAY HIM NOT BELIEVING THEM ABOUT THE FUTURE AT FIRST MAKES ME THINK OF PARTNER REFUSING TO BELIEVE GROVYLE#it's not a slight to them it's just. he idolised dusknoir and he's in denial. he doesn't wanna believe things went so bad#and honestly i think he's probably wanting to avoid the idea that he let hero and partner down by letting dusknoir so close if he was bad#so he rejects that reality#damn now i wanna make a post about this#but I've also seen the aftermath of my mutuals facing backlash for chatotposting and it's like hmm. ppl can be so negative about him huh
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The thing about Camilla Hect is that she's Lancelot but we see almost nothing of her relationship with Guinevere. But also we do know that she's the one person Dulcinea thought might realize Cytherea was a fraud, and also iirc Camilla brings up whether Dulcinea will recognize them immediately before she stops existing. Of course she loves where Palamedes loves, and that's probably both a sublimation of her feelings about him and a natural consequence of those feelings - quoth Gideon, she's his sword, his right hand, an extension of his very self - but she wants to be seen by Dulcinea. Dulcinea believes Cam sees her. Their relationship is attached to their connections with Palamedes but still distinct from those connections until Cam and Pal disappear so completely into each other they stop existing. What I'm saying is that I think Dulcie should haunt Paul both literally and figuratively.
#tbh I think the cam/pal fic ive tried so far has failed me because it doesn't lean hard enough into the deranged fealty kink of it all#which is not to say that has to be a key component of their thing for other people but it is to me personally#but also the traditionally homoerotic but in this case extremely bisexual dynamic of being in love with your best friends' girl#anyway it's not that I think pal knows dulcie less it's that he's going to be too busy respecting the apparent rejection to#analyze it#my darlings!!!#I sometimes internally rail at Tazmuir for leaving the good stuff in the margins but there is so much good stuff#anyway dulcie! she clearly knew cam and pal were an absolute package deal but was she prepared for this package#I hope to find out
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OH I’M. SO FUCKING ANGRY I WAS SO EXCITED TO SHOW YOU GUYS MY SENIOR QUOTE BUT THEY. THEY REJECTED IT
#WITHOUT TELLING ME TOO#I WAS LIKE HAHA I KEPT THE MOB PSYCHO BIT GOING#anyway it was reigens “be a good person that is all”#we had really strict guidelines it was the only one i could fit#anyway#anyone got any ideas for my cap?#it’s just super annoying cuz 1) they rejected a lot of people’s quotes without telling them#2) you can VERY clearly see the handpicked and were biased about other peoples quotes#3) they just ruined a whole grade’s experience of getting a senior quote#cnp rants
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Just got THE DUMBEST form letter query rejection I've ever received.
#“Unfortunately there was too much telling language in the sample pages for me to feel truly immersed in the character or opening scene”#??????#i hate when agents do shit like this#don't pretend you're offering personalized feedback#when this is clearly just one of your stock responses#know how i know?#because the romantic leads are BOTH introduced within the first two paragraphs#yet this rejection says 'character' and not characterS#and i suppose this could be my ego speaking but i really don't think there's much 'telling' language at all#anyway rejections like this bug me because a lot of people would mistake it for personalized feedback and start making changes#and it bothers me that agents are so careless when they have SO MUCH power over authors#the querying slog
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I had a weird dream last night that I was in a place like an airport terminal and for some reason I had the reel part of a fishing rod, or else it was a very short fishing rod (even in the dream I was like . . . uh why do I have this) and then I saw Andrew Garfield a few seats away and he had one too? Then he sorta came over towards me, like he was standing two feet away and I tried to strike up a conversation about how it was weird that we both had this fishing stuff and he completely ignored me 😭
#everything about that was weird#it's not the first dream I've had being with him in an airport#but why did this one make him so rude#and feature fishing equipment??#I don't get the reel thing#the him ignoring me is clearly my whole fear of rejection and no one wanting me#but the rest is . . . uh???#personal#random
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i don't believe in evil i don't believe evil exists believing in evil as a concrete force rather than something more tangible like cruelty or harm is dangerous it's wrong i don't believe in evil i don't (<- just saw the trump gaza bluesky post)
#i am no longer a person i am a yawning chasm of anguish grief and spite#i don't even. i don't.#doomer shit in tags if you want to avoid that:#is it out of character? no. obviously. i should know that by now#but it's like jumping the shark of fucking blatant indescribable rejection of the value of human life#with increasingly larger and more rapidly deployed sharks#we are sliding into hell and i can feel it. i can feel it right this minute#some of us are closer to the flames than others but we're all going down#i haven't been keeping up That closely with politics lately so allow me a moment of despair before i have to pretend everything's fine#and go back to my homework. normal life. normal that life is like that and that we've made it so it needs to be like that#just moving on like nothing matters when it so clearly does to keep your own life from falling apart#and whatever and everything else other people have said a million times onward and forever#and ever and ever
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regarding that josh tweet you just reblogged. how much experience do you think aloth has, just in general? he's obviously not very social and he notes the watcher as being one of the first people he's ever been really close to. the banessa stuff initially made me think he had some game, but i'm curious about your opinion.
I'd like to think he's had *some* experience but... yeah not a whole lot. In addition to what you said, Aloth also spent quite some time working undercover/using an alias and he really doesn't strike me as someone who would pursue people sexually/romantically while lying about his identity. But yeah, we do know that Iselmyr liked to urge him to get a partner and he had time during the timeskip between PoE 1 and 2 (and we do know that he had people crushing on him during his academy years too, no matter how asocial he was there). So yeah, that's my 2 cents, Anon.
#replies and whatnot#Anonymous#I remember getting a similar ask years ago but I couldn't find it#but yeah a lot of this is rooted in my personal preferences#not bc I have anything against inexperienced characters I just don't like it when the main character#is also their LI's first and only love ever#it feels like a copout from writing a LI who has figured what they like in a relationship and a MC with a clearly defined characterization#Ik that often this is done to help the reader/player self-insert but uhh... Yeah I don't think that makes it any better#And ngl I do appreciate that Aloth is written as a character who knows what his boundaries are and isn't afraid to reject the Watcher#if they don't respect those boundaries no matter how much he loves them it's a really mature way to write their dynamic
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receiving bad news in a good way is so weird. this is emotionally like that drink that people were describing as tasting aggressively and disorientingly like nothing
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