#not to weird flex or anything
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#not to weird flex or anything#but like. I basically live on an ongoing crisis about my art and I can't stop criticizing myself and I'm never as good as I think I should#so you know that thing when you make something and you're feeling pretty good about and then months later you go back and it's kinda cringe#I'm getting the opposite of that in which when I finish something I'm like this is alright I guess :/ and then months later I come back and#I'm like. wow.... did I make this?? :00 good job good job#lmao and I think it's nice#I've been going over all of my stuff to select some things to post on other platforms and this occured to me#🦀
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ghost bride
#ffxiv#ffxiv oc#geese art#ocs#oc: yesui#no deeper meaning to this just having fun#there’s no way she’d have a normal wedding tho.#or even a normal proposal.#anything like that for her would be like… a combo between the spy x family grenade pin proposal and that scene from pirates of the carribean#u know what i’m talking about ……. yea#i don’t think she’s interested in anythjng official tho. why should anyone be able to say we’re bonded forever other than us ….#she’ll still take the ring though. you’d think for monetary/flexing reasons but no… she may have a smidge of romance in her#in her own weird way.
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its so weird to not be prepping for nano this year. 16 wins in a row + a handful of camps and this year will be nothing.
not even a joke, i've done it for half my life now and it's just. weird.
#also because they did fuck up but like last years event i didn't enjoy#the writing was hard the book was uncooperative and the whole concept of it just didn't work right for me#end of an era i guess#i was never hugely in the community part of it and it still feels Weird to not be doing it this year#(i dont write 16 wins to flex (mostly) but to say how much writing i got out of the event)#(for most of those years that was the only time i managed to finish a draft of anything)
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🦴
#blackened bones au just got so wild y'all#mr 'whats a king to a god whats a god to a nonbeliever' jaehaerys targaryen over there who is not king btw#and is instead like a 12 year old hand of the king (sorry tywin) because his oldest brother has a huge case of 'weird flex but okay'#and his extra early elopement and subsequent earlt creation of the doctrine for Reasons#made aegon go you have been promoted u are now one of my elite employees!! took him from cupbearer to hand. as one does#but anyway aegon mr black maegor black magic baby electric boogaloo was unable to produce more than one pregnancy in his wife lol#because the black magic is FUCKED for REASONS (maegor skewed it gay. also for reasons. namely fucking aenys reasons)#and now he has no (male) heir and HE wants to make aerea his heir bc aegon is the chad of this family. also visenya got to him young#rhaena the lesbian is on board for obvious reasons but alyssa is decidedly Not & either is the council bc like. the targs have been wilding#in one decade they balerioned the starry sept and vhagared the sept of remembrance killing like. most of the high ranking sevenists lmao.#lol even. plus jae and aly also eloped cause ofc they did the council was trying to marry her to a hightower. oh and also the doctrine#been a bit of a decade and all that happened in just 9 years. also viserys and lysarra (oc first maegor/aenys daughter) got married#which was the first post doctrine marriage. they're the two crazies. she has a mini balerion. went wonderfully as im sure you can imagine#anyway the targs need to CHILL. give the realm a breather. NOT CHANGE THOUSANDS OF YEARS OF INHERITANCE PRECEDENT.#aegon the chad is not helping them do that. so alyssa uses her big brain. & she's like well aegon is a black magic baby (thnx maegor)#and he's king. so why not get him a Surrogate and make him an heir. for Reasons it can't be any of his fellow maegor black magic babies#(black magic babies can't have kids with each other bc they're barely fertile on their own lol) and his remaining options are aly & vaella#both of whom are out bc they're a) 14 and 11 respectively and also b) married and a future nun. shit happens.#viserys is a no cuz lysarra is Crazy and aegon knows it and respects it. that leaves jaehaerys 😁 the good dutiful fourth son 😁#the og machiavellian propaganda maker 😁 who will do Anything to get what he wants 😁 esp for the good of his house and the Realm 😁#long story short jaehaerys the nonbeliever to hardcore sevenist loser gets valyrian magic gender fuckery & gives birth to the heir <3#a delight to negotiate with alysanne as im sure you understand. truly didn't almost end the marriage he rewrote the law and religion for#shit happens <3 long live the third prince of dragonstone aerys targaryen who is the second shipname baby future king#(the first was aenys. aegon = ae rhaenys = nys. now aegon the uncrowned that WAS crowned named his heir aegon = ae and jaehaerys = rys)#(bc naming his first daughter after aerea and his second after rhaena wasn't enough evidently. he is a crazy person)#(he names the twin [they're twins it is the worst year of jaehaerys's LIFE think renesmee & bella] alystair. for alysanne.)#(he is a crazy person x2.)#and that's on today's episode of:#blackened bones au
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so fucking upset. i looked up what's considered concerning weight loss and got a statistic. i looked up the same question but specified teens and i got a bunch of articles about how to lose weight. what the fuck
#tw weight loss#? idk if that tags necessary but better safe than sorry#past this point there is discussion of ARFID and stuff#LMFAO also ive had a medium to mild case of ARFID my entire life and no one noticed past concern for my pickiness#i say medium to mild because ive gotten better recently#i even ate half a bowl of the noodles i dont like the other day. AND they had been touched by shrimp & cabbage juice & soft peanuts#i mean i did drown them in soy sauce first and got nauseous thinking about it the rest of the day. but progress#i mean. im the type of person to skip a meal or barely eat because i dont like the food available or its too loud where i am#my adhd impacts it too like sometimes ill forget to eat or wont be able to make anything that day#but like goddamn. a growing child should be gaining weight. 'we should keep an eye on that' every single time and then no action#you know maybe thats part of why my body hurts sometimes and feels weird and shaky other times#its hard to tell based on how bony i am or whatever because i also naturally am a string bean and im not. like. starving myself#i get the same comments about how i should eat more and how im so skinny when im healthy and when im not#or i used to. people are generally less intrusive now that im older#gosh i need to flex my metaphorical brain muscles more i put way too much thought into the wording of this
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I’ll be on tumblr posting abt sports yaoi or whatever then go hang out with my irls and one of my besties will casually mention one of her cousins just got signed to arsenal 😭😭
#it’s hard being a sports fan whilst also being . well.#it’s funny I just keep being more and more connected I’ll probs have to quit football for a little while at some point of it gets more#concentrated much like I had to quit watching rugby for a few years bc I knew so many players / their kids#likewise things started getting weird for me in f/1 bc I had friends / mutual friends who’d hooked up with like a quarter of the grid and#it was kinda awks#this isn’t like flexing or anything it’s just a weird perspective. to have#both that I used to do high performance myself and was teammates with like Olympians so saw firsthand a lot of shit wrt male athletes esp#but also have that perspective#and also just having loads of other random links. like most of them are second hand atm I’m not personally at school with any players kids#anymore 🤣 I just have a lot of friends who get around a lot I guess 😭😭😭😭
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write with me . . . i'm a fun (angsty) time
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here for my favourite pastime: being irrationally angry about random tumblr posts
#unfortunately i am very nosy so i need to know the results of polls immediately and therefore must vote#that “what is your best facial feature” poll with no see results option#with the caption 'if y'all want results you can find part of yourself to love and choose that'#actually made me feel INFINITELY worse about myself and my relationship w my own body than any see results option ever could!!#like going through the list up and down 14 times and not seeing anything i genuinely believe#just to pick ear bc like i guess i enjoy how earrings look nice w my outfit??#just to see the addition on that option as (weird flex but ok)#like fuck you!!!!! fake forced self love coupled with judgement!!!#sorry i hated it so much but had to stop myself from reblogging it with hate tags somehow lol#no offense to anyone who loved that poll though truly! <3
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👵🏾✌🏾
#2 years old and one gone now but#my biggest flex#was having two grandmas#not to rub it in or anything but yeah#my grandma#two times#weird flex but ok
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fun fic fact of the day: I wrote almost the entirety of fight or flight on my ipad n wrote half of its still raining w a fever<3
#ahhh nostalgia....#I have a whole ass comp now but ngl it was fun to just write on my little cracked ipad#(btw this isn't a weird flex or anything I just found it funny)
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Hnnng….going through it in such a specific and weird way so now I’m physically fighting off the side of me that wants to make an Impulse Purchase
#okay super specific tea but….#my dad whom I havent spoken to since like 2015#(and ruined my ability to go to college/ drained my personal savings due to a gambling addiction)#is offering to pay for a ticket for me to watch the musical six#but the showing is in London and I live in….the ass end of no where in germany#the showing is in October#which technician is enough time to plan a trip#but like he has made the assumption that I can just….do that??#anyway I want to roast this whole situation with my mom but now she is in Mom Mode and just wants to give advice#instead of shit talking this whole thing with me#and I can’t bring this up to my only friend I am close enough to unload this kind of thing to#because he just got a new boyfriend which means he doesn’t want to talk about anything but that 😔#but yeah this is a weird one#also I guess my dad i getting remarried#and is inviting me#but that is literally on the other side of the world so I will not go#which pains me because he brought it up by saying ‘I know you won’t come but I’m getting remarried’#like??!? bitch now I want to go#just to flex on the cousins honestly#I’ll prob delete this later#but god do I need to get even more drunk Right Now#all this to say…..I deserve a little treat 🥺#but the worst part is…..I am incapable of seeing money as anything other than something that needs to be saved and untouchable#because of this whole thing#like I have been Anti Little Treat this whole time because my dad took nearly 25000$ from me 😬#like I’ve managed to save nearly 12000$ since getting this new job by buying licherally nothing for myself#and to use any of that money even just to buy lunch at work feels like I’m screwing future me over if that makes any sense#thanks for reading this journal entry if you’ve made it this far 😳
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I will not buy a copy of lungbarrow instead of getting a tattoo I will not buy a copy of lungbarrow instead of getting a tattoo I will not buy a copy of lungbarrow instead of getting a tattoo I will not
#I don’t even care about lungbarrow that much.#it’s just such a stupid Weird Flex to have that only means anything to a very specific group of people#one day I’ll find it cheap at a used bookstore. I believe in myself
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I got the Top 4.47% on this English Vocabulary test
#sorry for flexing but#tbf this test was Weird and i have Qualms with it but like. go crazy#alsp it's multiple choice so like. a lotta this was more process of elimination than anything#still
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Guys I just spent 14 hours in a fugue state writing 10k words of fic and not a single part of this is an exaggeration. If anything it feels more tame than what I just got out of.
#ughgghg#this is definitely related to my burnout episode. like yesterday it was 14 hours of cotl and today it was Just Writing Forever.#i didnt eat#i barely drank anything#i had like a hotdog at 7 and that was it.#none of this is to flex btw im just recording some weird ways chronic illness burnout plus executive function gets you
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sometimes the smallest things annoy me
#like. not to be rude pr anything but most of the ppl that are reblogging my umbrella academy bad finale post#are saying something along the lines of 'oh i'm glad i stopped watching / stopped liking the show' or like 'thank god i'm never watching it'#and like yeah okay woohoo you sabed yourselves from disappointment but like. don't get weird about it. y'know#like i don't think it's that much of a flex for you to be saying that you basically don't care about it at all#when it used to mean something to other people who are genuinely disappointed?? and who will probably not feel any better#by reading that you 'saw it coming ' or that it was bad from the start#like. the fact that it had 4 seasons means that it wasn't bad from the start otherwise they would've cancelled it earlier??#i know it had a following because i was literally there when it did. when it was a good show. so like. maybe don't dismiss that?#and i know it's on me for making the post be presented as a meme. like yeah it's an unserious post#but i think what got under my skin just a little was the sheer amount of ppl who felt it was necessary to add commentary#stating that they're glad they don't gaf about it#and also because i've seen it been directed at other shows that used to have a big audience that actively loved them#only to end up completely insulted by people who either didn't even watch it or stopped caring about it early on#come on guys. this is the fandom website and it includes trash tv because most of us have at least one piece of media that objectively#isn't like. emmy material but we really love it so maybe tone it down a little??#anyways i'll probably end up deleting this in about thirty minutes but i needed to put it into the void
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idk who's turning the strike into "some own against fandoms", this post was criticizing people who make up those fandoms that have turned themselves against the strike because how dare these writers ask for compensation and get their favorite movie or show delayed? We all know writers love their work imo but this post is specifically targeted against fandom people who think their newest favorite media is more important than people being paid well, idk what ur getting mad about
writer's strike is amazing actually go girl get that fucking marvel show UNMADE get that fucking gay pirate show CANCELLED get these chronically online fandom bitches' obsessions on HOLD until the corporations learn to pay you your mf money that you deserve
#who is turning the strike into a weird flex on fandom tho#i am literally just some mf on tumblr with like 50 followers i aint turning the strike into anything#get this#writers want to be paid#writers want to not live on a unlivable wage#some fandom ppl out there have been INSUFFERABLE with complaining about the strikes for#idk#daring to delay season 6 of Captain Peepeepoopoo because workers are striking because workers want to LIVE#what is the priority here#i am not flexing on fandoms but people in fandoms are so fucking self-centered sometimes#i cannot believe you gotta spoonfeed fandom people basic human decency because their show got delayed like#come on#go outside do something else or at least idk#do not complain#this post was so not meant to flex on fandoms or whatever you said i am just criticizing the lack of basic human decency lmao
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