#not this struggling to pay for literally anything bullshit

[00-oh-yanno-00]

i have to work today and i’ll be honest, homies, if i get one more “aw you have to work on chriwtmas :(“ from a customer or another “ik its chriwrmss but we still have a call flow :(“ from management i’m going to throw the whole company into the ocean and then myself off a bridge

[hellfireeddiemunson]

i have bad melted soup brain today and i hate it

[astrologyvas]

some virgo notes in honor of virgo szn

୨ৎ [18+] ˚˖𓍢 🦢✧˚.

⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪

⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪

virgo moon — this placement is so brat. sheer tank tops, cigarettes, making questionable decisions at 3am. the sign of virgo is notorious for being clean and neat, but this placement is so beautifully sloppy. (ex. charli xcx, lorde, madonna, zoe kravitz)

virgo rising — little fawns drinking from the stream. but also the type of people you make awkward eye contact with. virgo risings are so observant of their surroundings, and i've noticed that if they see someone paying attention to them too, they can get super flustered

asteroid eros in virgo (433) — their heart is won with a heartfelt compliment. also the type of people who watch 18+ videos just to take notes. they may come across shy & reserved, but when they open up, these native's want to look and perform perfectly. they want to be everything their partner finds attractive. definitely captivated by intellect and wit

lilith in virgo (bml) — these people are on a mission for knowledge, and they might find a lot of healing through it. the kind of person who is completely consumed by their craft. i've also noticed they have a lot of shame and guilt when it comes to being wrong, they want to be able to prove their point no matter what

virgo in the 2nd house — very coy when it comes to discussing finances. probably refuses to share how much they make or what their salary is

virgo mars — virgo is the fashion sign. with virgo mars, i've noticed they're usually the "executive" fashion placement. these people are gifted visionaries when it comes to high fashion and outfit composition (ex. princess diana). mercurial energy in general meshes well with the fashion world— but virgo mars specifically have a very refined and chic personal style

virgo venus — while virgo mars have an eye for fashion framework, virgo venus is the muse. these people are able to pull off clothing extremely well, a lot of things just fall on them in a visually pleasing way. so many fashion icons w this placement

chiron in virgo — being "the wound of perfection," these people tend to have a never-ending feeling that something is wrong with them, and i've noticed they can easily fall victim to the toxic self-improvement mindset. (ex. chiron in virgo in the 4th house— pressure from family to be flawless, family could have placed intense standards and restrictions on them)

. ݁₊ ⊹ ౨ৎ . ݁₊ ⊹ ⋆.˚ ⋆ ˚⋆౨ৎ˚ ⋆.˚ ⋆ ˚｡⋆౨ৎ˚⊹ ⋆ ˚⋆౨ৎ˚ ⋆.˚

virgo descendant — these native's want someone to cook for them, someone who wakes them up so they don't have to set an alarm. perpetually yearning to frolic in the forest with their partner

virgo mercury — the FBI. their bullshit detector is crazy, and arguing with them is literally terrifying. the negative aspect of this placement i've noticed is that they can struggle with being taken too seriously, even if they're trying to be funny or lighthearted. i've also noticed that they get immense relief from journaling, it's a good way to release all the energy in their head

virgo sun — one of the more intimidating virgo placements from my experience. they can be similar to virgo risings, however i've noticed virgo suns are a little bit more intense and aloof upon initially meeting them

virgo rising — every virgo rising i know gets super carsick. either that or they have such sensitive stomachs in general, like getting nauseous from eating anything. also a recycled take, but i swear they really are prone to lactose intolerance

virgo degrees 6°, 18° — placements in virgo degrees can give the planet/celestial body an entwined energy of rigidity and reservation, and can higher your standards revolving the themes of the planet. (ex. sagittarius rising at 6° could manifest as someone who can be obsessive and nitpicky over their body, or is more shy than typical sagittarius ascendants. may even slightly resemble physical virgo traits)

asteroid lust in virgo (4386) — i've noticed that these people feel like they can't fit into their own standards, especially regarding sex. deep insecurity can stem from physical intimacy, may have a lot of anxiety around how their body looks while in the act

virgo midheaven — these people obtain the important roles of society and crush them. i've noticed that these native's can handle the pressure from vital and demanding roles like doctors, dentists, or manager positions because of their personal desire for perfection—specifically revolving their career

virgo sun — this placement has such an infamous reputation in music. they're the blueprint for so many genres and types of sound, the people you think of when you think of "music" (michael jackson, beyoncé, freddie mercury, amy winehouse)

⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪

please do not copy or repeat my work anywhere

[suguru-getos]

| Bully!Satoru Gojo x F!reader | Part 2 |

-> Part 1

Summary: You had just transferred schools, and your first day was an encounter with your new bully. He’s mean, terrifically hot & absolutely a menace. Though there’s more to that personna. Chapter Summary: After humiliating Gojo in the cafeteria, he has better ways to force pay-back. Hey! That shirt you ruined, was expensive.

Warnings: Oh he is a real piece of shit here with a barely there moral compass. Mentions of humiliation, bul!ying, belittling, teasing. The reader is slowly getting into an auto-pilot mode.

New chapter every week, comment down below if you want to be tagged! ^^

Taglist: @mc-reborn @tvdumarvelhpsimp @alula394 @getoxmahito @knanamii @he4rts444mi @localginger22 @animeisforkings @ran6ia @creative1writings @lenaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa @nerdiel-has-no-braincells @zoemaelol @shoutascoffeepot

It feels like pure humiliation, the way you walked off from the cafeteria. Satoru stood there, the warm, sticky gravy sticking to him. It feels like a sensory nightmare. White hot rage simmering through the very marrow of his bones. He exhales, glancing up just to see if there was anyone dumb enough to enjoy his misery he could stomp on. Nobody had the balls to, nobody has the balls to until you come across.

What was your fucking problem?

He walked away from the cafeteria, long strides eager to seek you out and punish you ruthlessly for your deranged and depraved, bratty behaviour. Satoru Gojo is worshipped like the literal god, who the hell are you? Meanwhile, you, amidst all your molten courage flowing in your veins, were the epitome of anxiety. You can't mistake his blazing steamy rage filled blue eyes greying… to be anything but merciful. You're not delusional.

A veiny, pale hand gripped your hair, the other wrapped around your mouth as you were dragged through the lonesome corridor. You whimpered at the burn in your scalp and before you could register what was happening, Satoru was standing in front of you. Baring his hostile teeth as he grits. "You've done it." He's almost amused, contemplating what more he can do to you, what more can you really handle… then again, does it matter if you can or can’t handle?

"Here's what's going to happen…" He pushed himself against your chest, unrelenting at how disgusting you might feel, transferring the filth on his shirt to yours. You struggled like a fish out of water. Satoru is taller, bulkier, stronger and you realize that soon enough.

"You will be my silly little pet, because guess how much this shirt costs?" He chuckled, whispering gravely against the shell of your ear. "1800 dollars, missy."

You feel shocked upon hearing the price, eyes widening as he slowly leaned his hand away so you could speak.

"Either you fucking pay me back, with interest for each day. Or you shut the fuck up and be my silly little pet for a month I will stomp on, my little useless errand girl. Sounds fitting to someone who looks like you, no?" He smirks, watching the colour fade in your eyes. He is sort of impressed by himself, the way he instantaneously thought of such a brilliant idea. That money means nothing to him, but not everyone is that blessed.

Once you finally gathered what was happening, you raised a brow. "Why should I be an errand girl to someone who collided against me and is now begging to be paid for his filthy shirt? Learn to walk properly asshole!" You spit back, eyes siren and jaw gritted.

"Kay then, I will ask your mommy and daddy to pay for their daughter's bullshit." He left your hair, the pain subsiding into a dull ache.

He wasn't fucking serious was he? You and your parents weren't essentially on the best terms, they have just shifted to Tokyo and while they would be willing to pay, your self-respect wouldn't allow you. Your mother would keep taunting you about this for the rest of your life… you really don't want that.

Satoru noticed the shift in your behaviour when he mentioned your parents - "Heh, guess they don't like you either huh?" He smirked, not caring how hard it would jab you. It kinda did.. but you couldn't care less. Not coming from him especially.

"10 days, of me being your errand girl." You wanted to be ploughed down into death once you uttered these words. There was nothing you could do anyways. Parents involving, not so much…

"A month." Satoru shrugged, smirking. He has you exactly where he wants. His sole goal is to make you cry every single day and make sure you apologize for being a little shit to him.

"And, you do whatever the fuck I say you to. If I tell you to clean my shoe with your tongue, you 'fucking' clean my shoe with your tongue."

Oh it felt like dying, like you were stabbed endlessly by a thousand swords when he said that.

"How do I know after a month you wouldn't bother me or my parents with the money?" Satoru raised a brow, smirking. "I'm a man of my word, little bitch." He squeezed your face in a single hand, watching your puckered lips. "I say you're free after a month, then you're free after a month, though you'll wish every single day that you paid me back." He chuckled, rolling his eyes as he let go of your face with a jerk, letting the back of your head collide a little with the wall.

You were so cute, small, stompable…

"See me when the school ends."

Satoru walked away with that, and your shoulders slumped. This is what it has truly come to? You needed some time to yourself after this, why are you always so pushy and so cocky? What if you didn't humiliate him… a month of sheer torture is what you've signed up for, just to not be tortured by your mother. Besides, it's a lot of money and you don't think your parents owe you because a shitty ass senior got pissed.

You dragged your feet to him, after the school ended. His whole group was present, they were busy chitchatting. Satoru perked up like a spoiled brat the moment his eyes glazed through you beneath the glasses. "My little lap bitch is hereeee~" He perked, walking towards you and smirking at how you grimace when you see the way he was treating you.

"Go, fetch us popsickles." He grinned, giving you the money. You didn't say anything, trying oh so hard not to slap him across the face and breathing out. "Mkay."

You looked up, counting the number of people, "Excluding yourself, no popsickles for you." He simply shrugged.

Oh he was getting beneath your nerves so bad. "I wouldn't buy them for myself." You explained anyway, "Don't wan' em." With that, you walked away, getting to the vending machine and getting those fucking popsickles which you rather wish were poisoned so he dies for good.

When you're back, he made sure you give them to everyone, made sure you give it to him- after opening the packet- and then dropped it.

"Whoops, gotta run again lil girl." He chuckled, his friends were… stunned too. Satoru is a cunt, they all know that. He pushes people through their limits but he's never been this much of an asshole towards any girl. Maybe because none of them did anything except slither around him and worship him.

You tear up, you have never… felt this humiliated in your life ever. Nanami gives his popsickle to Satoru, "Here, Gojo san. I don't want it. Please take it." He is so polite, kind… but his Senpai had other plans.

"Didn't you hear what I just said?" He raises his voice a little, and you are left with nothing but a reminder of him demanding this money from your parents. Your feet are stoned to the ground though, unmoving. "Okay." You managed to say again, taking a deep breath as you force yourself to the vending machine yet again, bringing back his popsickle.

You thought highschool would be fun, you would make new friends, go to karaoke parties, excel in subjects, in extra curriculars, whatnot.. you never expected yourself landing into the clutches of rich asshole Gojo Satoru.

Once you're back, you unwrap it again and give it to him. For fuck's sake he finally accepted.

"Kay, gimme your number." He extends his hand with his phone on it, letting you reluctantly add your number and saving it as 'Servant'. Showing it to you to rub salt on your wounds. "Off you go, see you tomorrow." He smiled. You were relieved you don't need to see his face for the rest of the day.

Once you reached home, you cried. All the emotions overwhelming you all at once. Guess he was right, he will make you cry everyday..

The rest of the day passes by in a haze before you find yourself back in school again.

"OH good morning little errand girl!" Satoru's presence looms, he was waiting for you at the entrance, you looked up at him. Not responding for now. You needed to get to class. OH so you're being indifferent now? Satoru is pissed…

"So eager to go to class, I have a job for you though!" He snickers, watching your stompy feet come to a pause. Good, you were still listening. He will push you a little more. "During the lunch time, go and bring my lunch for me, kay? You won't eat unless I finish." He smirked, walking away.

The problem is… it's not fun anymore. At least… not how it was when you retaliated. Maybe he shouldn't have used the money thing and just teased you when you had the means to push it back. You just nodded and left.

During the lunch time, you did as directed. Bringing his plate to him in front of everyone… oh it satiated his silly little ego so much.

Though he wonders if you will snap… finally. If not, he can just push it. No? He extends his hand to Haibara who reluctantly gave his water bottle to Satoru.

Before you could process what happened, you were drenched. The white shirt now translucent, showing your bra. Everyone laughed, some of them were gawking at how the shirt does no justice to you, now that it sticks to your skin, you look much more delectable. "Oops, my hand slipped." He says again, though he knows he's pushed this one too hard. Today was only the second day. Besides, a vile feeling erupted beneath him when he felt others gawk at you. Look away. Look. THE FUCK. AWAY.

Rolling his eyes, he puts his blazer on you, "Here, go get changed.." He mumbled, your silence was not helping. Not fucking helping when you shivered at the coldness of your body, how you just… took it. You didn't even cry, this was to be expected from him anyways.

You nodded, walking towards the infirmary alone. "For fuck's sake…" Satoru snarled, whatever left of his inner conscience slapping him hard as he followed you to it. Making sure you change your clothes and gave you a juice.

You were silent again, taking it from him. "Got nothing to say?" He raises a brow, "I thought you were all big and mean…" He emphasized again.

"Nothing to say. I expected worse." You shrugged, walking away. You expected 'worse'? What kind of worse…

"What the fuck do you mean?" He holds your wrist, "You know, like beating me the fuck up or something." You looked at his eyes. Wow… you truly think of him as vile and disgusting don't you? Why does it pinch him so hard? He's done nothing but bother you and made you believe he is trash.

"Kay." He mumbles, walking away. He's the one bullying you and he's the one being bullied at the same time.

Satoru Gojo doesn't bother you for the rest of the week and the weekend after.

Monday… he asks you to hold his bag for him all the way to his home. Watches you cutely manage both yours and his bag when he could easily hold your bag and you…

You're panting softly when you reach the Gojo estate, cutting the call from your mother and texting her you'll be late. "Here's your bag." You gave it to him and he took it from you easy peasy. "Alright, well.." He can see the sweat beads on your forehead, the way you are twisting your shoulder for relief. Suguru has already stopped talking to him because of this behaviour. You look cute, even when you piss him off so bad.

"Go run home." Satoru scoffs and leaves. Maybe he should just shorten the duration from a month to 15 days… but then, would you become the rebel he liked you to be or would you just ignore him…. contemplation, contemplation… and lots of contemplation.

[kaija-rayne-author]

Veilguard article thoughts.

Obligatory 'I'm not an asshole' disclaimer. Feel free to jump to the cut if you've read it.

Something came to my attention. I need to make it crystal clear that I utterly love the diversity in DAV. It's fantastic. I'm also a heavily left leaning, non-binary, queer as fuck reviewer, editor, and author.

I'm was media blackout while I played this. Please be safe and take care of yourselves. Arguing with incels and white supremacists is completely pointless. They sea lion worse than an actual sea lion. Your mental health is important.

Note. None of my writing on DA, but especially DAV, is edited. This is just my off the cuff writing. I don't have the time, energy, or heart to edit them properly.

Though., every single time the anti-queer brigade comes out for a new DA game, I sit there thinking 'have you bozos ever played any DA game, like, ever?' My guess is nope.

FWIW? I'm not one of the people who complained about DA2 and DAI. There's a pretty brown-nosing article running around that I'm not going to dignify with a repost.

It's another of those 'if you didn't like DAV it's your fault' nonsense pieces I suspect BioWare of paying for.

I only started playing DA around 3 years ago. And I've never been in Fandom spaces for pretty much anything.

So what's their bullshit paid and/or copium reason for why I hated DAV?

Wasn’t in Fandom spaces. Didn't play the games or say a negative thing about them when they came out. Only bought them near release. Loved The Keep. (I had my first kid not long after DAO came out. I didn't game except for ones I could drop really fast if a kid needed me for like, 10 years.)

I'm an editor and writer by trade. A good one, I'm extremely media literate. I have actual degrees in some of the media critique stuff. (English, Creative Writing, English Literature) and I have two braincells to rub together.) Some days, it's only two, but you win some, lose some.

Whoever spewed that article really loves binaries. It's not an either/or, love/hate, you're smart if you agree with me/dumb if you don't, you're with me or against me situation. Two things can be true. Even more!

I can be completely unhappy with the crappy writing in DAV and still appreciate the good things I did like about it.

I can be truly happy for people who enjoyed it, even if I hated it. I actually wanted to love it, y'know?

I can want a morally grey game with choices that actually do matter (no choice actually matters in DAV), and be against those awful things depicted in said morally grey game in real life because it's bloody fiction.

I can want a struggle for the elves freedom, without supporting enslavement IRL. Because completely brushing the morally grey and politically sticky issues previously set out in the games under the carpet leaves a very unsatisfying ending.

And yes, DAV is sanitized. It's disney-fied FFS! The devs were so afraid of complaints that they went way too far into mediocrity for my taste. And whoops, here the game is getting complaints anyway, because they were essentially cowards, instead.

When it comes to crafting entertainment, you have to keep the parable of the old man, the son, and the donkey in mind. You can't please everyone no matter what you do.

Gasp! I can even want the veil to come down, because in the Lore, (you know, the Lore they either retconned into illogical insensibility, or completely ignored? In favour of bum rushing us through a story that made no damned sense and was just badly written?) Anyway, in the ignored Lore, it's clear the veil is strangling both magic and life out of THEDAS. And that doesn't make me an awful person. 1. Because the Lore is clear. 2. Because saving the actual world (even in a game) is a good thing. 3. Because it's fiction.

It's so hilariously ironic that someone complaining about the lack of media literacy about DAV critiquers while writing that article exposed their own so ridiculously. 🤣

I legitimately don't care if you liked it or hated it. I did a review series under media blackout for DAV. I've never complained about much in the DA universe until DAV tbh. I don't fit any of those either/or binary choices in that article. So explain why I hated DAV.

Something I do care about? I do care if you're being an asshole or a decent person to other fans. Stop being dickshits to each other over a video game. I love gaming and it's an important part of my life. None of us are in kindergarten. Act like adults FFS (unless you're not actually an adult.)

Kindness is usually the right choice. No one truly understands what another person is going through. A kind word or a not-posted comment can make a world of difference.

[psychabolition]

Hi. I was the person who sent the ask about what needs to be done instead of psychiatry. I only just read your response now. In the time between sending the ask and now I’ve done a lot more research into anti-psychiatry and psych abolition. I understand how it’s an oppressive system and how it harms people. I agree with the need to dismantle it. But as soon as I read the response to my ask I broke down crying.

You talk about the importance of community. Or being able to rely on friends in times of crisis rather than therapists and psychiatrists. I have no community. No friends. I used to think I was okay with that. But I guess I was lying to myself. I am considered distasteful to be around. Scratch that, I actively make myself distasteful to be around. Because then I can at least expect people to inevitably hate me rather than have high expectations and be let down every single time. I’m desperately waiting for my therapy appointment in two days. I know I need someone better. Someone who I can actually tell that I cut myself a couple days ago without them deciding that I need everything I love taken away from me for who knows how long. But I fear I will never have someone better. I fear that even my therapist only tolerates talking to me because they’re paid to tolerate it.

You post about the importance of community if we are to break free from oppressive systems. How do we build that community? How?

Hey !! Thank you for your ask !

I totally understand you . Like I literally know exactly what thats like , trust me.

Ik that "community" is such a vague word that it almost sounds meaningless . Like wtf is that? In my opinion most people just have work colleagues or school mates or other students in their lectures and then go home to a nuclear family or to their partner - this is not "living in community" 💀💀💀. Most people dont live in community, our society (at least western societies like in europe - idk about others) is so fucking alienating . Any emotional connection is replaced w a hierarchy - teacher, prof, therapist, the nuclear family , your boss at work, even intimate relationships with a partner are like that in our patriarchal society . And then the people who you are on the same page as, youre pit against them - you need to be better than your work colleagues to get that promotion or at least so you dont get fired, you need to be able to pass that test alone in university/school otherwise you fall behind your peers or are literally excluded from visiting school/uni , a lot of friendships between women (or FLINTA* to be more accurate) fall apart because of cis men ... FUCK this society .

And then theres those of us that dont fit into this bullshit society. I dont care for a career in a job that will definitely bore me to death or overwork me till suicide and I have 0 interest in creating my own nuclear family after all the awful bullshit Ive had to endure because of the one I was born into. Like these are the 2 life options for us . Of course I was suicidal all the time as a teenager😭I couldnt imagine a future in a world where these are the only options in life !!!! Why are so many people NOT insane ? Who actually likes living this way ????? And if we cant or dont want to submit to "career via education and/or nuclear family" we're worth nothing in this society . We're ostracized ,isolated, stigmatized .

What Im dealing w right now is also connected to all that . the nuclear family that I grew up in wants to stop supporting me financially bc I dont submit to societal expectations of career and education .💀 a lot of my friends are also struggling w literally paying rent bc their parents randomly stopped giving them money for similiar reasons, its awful . This is why the nuclear family is the opposite of community to me. I'd do anything for my friends so they dont go homeless or without food or without support no matter their life choices and especially if they struggle I want to be there for them MORE not less .FUCK our parents fuck the nuclear family . They all slowly start to cut us off and make our lives hell because they dont fucking care about us and they never did .

Anyway . You dont have to built a new community obviously. So the question you need to ask yourself is - where does community still/already exist in your area ? Especially for those of us who deviate A LOT from social norms and "normal" life experiences . I can only talk about myself - Ive found solace in Subcultures that are from and for people who deviate extremely from social norms. Ive linked another ask that Ive answered where I listed all the subcultures that Ive somehow somewhen have heard people around me be a part of. Ik that it can also be very hard to get to be a part of those subcultures if youre not used to being around people (especially groups) but literally . Just keep trying, any subculture thats made up out of outcasts is very welcoming and very accepting. Also usually (at least in my experience) the subcultures are all conntected which is really cool because once you know people from one community you start to know a lot of people from other communities too ! It can still take time though . For me it only took 1 good friendship to a person whos in a subculture in my city to get to know many other people who are all actually part of a real community.

If you have a political subject that youre passionate about like anti psych or abolishing prisons or if there are other subjects that are important to you (animal liberation, youth liberation, climate crisis, queerfeminism , ... ?) I highly recommend a political group as a way to find community and to get into the subcultures in your area . You'll finally stop feeling powerless against oppressive institutions if you manage to actually change something through activism . Any and all activism also connects you a lot to the place that youre living in and the people with similiar struggles around you. Go to Antifa or communists - they have open meetings for newcomers all the time . Or try to join any other subculture - read the ask that I linked !! If youre queer for example thats awesome - go to a queer event Now . Being queer has always had so much culture, so much community .

Also trust me youre not awful to be around . You'll realize that youre actually cool to be around when you spend time w your friends and they appreciate you . and youll also stop having thoughts and fears about not being able to trust them or about them judging you or about how it must be awful to spend time with you (or whatever else you might think) when you have fun spending time together and you regularly see each other and you value each others time. You just havent met your people yet. Dont worry , you will.

[fairycosmos]

gonna be real as someone who has literally slept in my car and was homeless for the better part of two years bc i was escaping my alcoholic mother. the reason i experienced "real struggle" was because i was trying to escape her bullshit. living at home is honestly worse than everything i lived thru when i left. i hope you're keeping on as best you can

yeah honestly i feel like my hands are pretty tied irt to moving out bc my mam is physically + mentally ill so i'm paying the bills and pretty much maintaining her right now. i'm trying to get her financial support and a carer for her but if you know anything about the uk healthcare system rn it's that we're basically fucked and nothing works. i think living out of your car must have been very uniquely difficult, though, and it's honestly really admirable that you were able to get through it!! yeah i think you're right, sometimes living at homes kills you more than struggling on your own lol at least emotionally. sending a massive hug. x

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

WIBTA if I decided not to finish and deliver commissioned artwork?

I owe a couple of people art pieces I started literal years ago, before my life fell apart completely. They were taken on as emergency commissions; unfortunately the scope of the emergency was far greater than I could handle even with some extra funds.

I was homeless (not unhoused, luckily, but living at a friend's illegally without a permanent address on paper, with no access to stable internet when I had internet at all), severely anxious and depressed, struggling to find work and pay off debts, and only recently got kind of stable again thanks to support from people I currently live with, though I have a move-out deadline coming up...

To make matters worse, in all the chaos of the last few years, I lost all the art I had actually managed to get done, and in one case also lost access to the original commission refsheets. I could ask again, but after a few years of radio silence (because aforementioned lack of stable internet and severe mental illness) I don't even know how to approach them about it.

Even if I did figure out a way to do talk to them, my life situation still isn't stable enough that I could guarantee finished work in the near future.

I think about it every day, and have stress dreams and procrastinate on sleeping and eating because I "need to work on those drawings instead of relaxing", but that usually just results in me being unable to do anything because I feel like I have to make their art pieces into things worth waiting years for, so it's this big daunting monster in my head...

On top of that, I have new injuries that make drawing difficult, and every time I think I'll have a few days to catch up with tasks, some new crisis or other slew of bullshit happens. I really just don't have time, and when I have time I don't have energy bc all my energy is tied up in looking for work and being anxious about where to even start making a magnum opus for each client that would make the absurd wait worth their whiles...which, of course, just makes the wait longer.

I do still have the PayPal invoices, and could offer refunds once I have enough money saved to do that. It doesn't seem very satisfactory, but I don't know what else to do that's guaranteed to get them something. WIBTA if I just saved up and gave them their money back in lieu of the art they paid for?

What are these acronyms?

[showtoonzfan]

Maturing is realizing that the Star Vs. The Forces of Evil writers treated Tom like utter shit and he deserved SO much better. Not only did Star herself treat Tom like shit WHEN they were dating, but the way the show bended over backwards for Starco to the point that they ruined everything and were willing to destroy characters around them was sad. Tom went from a guy you could laugh at or legit hate for how toxic and obsessive he was, to a character I genuinely loved to watch and cared about. I will never make the argument that Star should have bowed down to him or anything, but what I like about his character is that he actually changed. He put the effort in to improve himself, and started to respect Star more and more. I also liked how we saw him struggle, he wasn’t used to these things but he pushed though and became a better person.

Then it all had to fucking fall downhill after Star and Tom got back together again in season 3. Don’t get me wrong, I’ll defend Tomstar for my life because they had the perfect chemistry and a more intriguing relationship since Tom actually learned from his mistakes and changed, BUT it was the way the show treated him once they dated. Once they dated everyone and their mama who watched this show KNOWS that the obvious pinning and banter for Starco started to happen. The show would slowly start to push Tom to back and not include him, while introducing the idea that Marco is jealous of Tom secretly and is starting to fall for Star. Literally while the characters were dating, Star and Marco started to have more Uwu moments and no matter how many times Star said “I have a boyfriend”, it was her in the end who treated Tom like garbage. If you also watched the show you’ll know that a lot of people starting to really not like Star because her character basically turned into a HUGE annoying and hypocritical brat, and yeah, she did.

I think the scene that signifies just how bad she treated Tom was where he admitted to her that he knew she kissed Marco and SHE had the nerve to be mad at HIM, painting him out to be the bad guy and then storming off. And yes, I get that Marco is the one who kissed her and it took her by surprise, but the fact that she had the nerve to get pissed at him for not telling her is just….WOW. The same thing happened at a ball party, where Tom for once gave her space and let her do her own thing, and Star acted like a brat and got mad at him for not paying attention to her. And even at the end, Tom never put it against Star or Marco that they kissed when he was dating her, or even all the obvious banter they had. He was never mad at them because that’s how good of a guy he became. And the show just bullshitted him, made him break up with Star for absolutely no reason that would make sense within his character, just so Starco could happen. It was so clear that the writers did not give a shit about Tom and it legit hurts. They massacred my boy and did him dirty.

[sol-consort]

Considering humans evolved to quickly recognize patterns for survival, do you think we'd irritate other species by being able to point out their natural camouflage or social ticks fast?

The salarians come to mind. They have a lot of social cues embedded within their genese. Mordin mentions one in ME2, where when salarians lie to each other. If it's for the safety or protection for the other person, then their body manages to convey it in a que. It's fully involuntary and can not be faked or suppressed, so their society knows not to question someone who gives this tick while lying.

But the key part here is that he compared it to human faking a yawn, saying that's how hard it is to fake.

Maybe he wasn't aware that faking a yawn is literally the easiest thing alive. You can fake an authentic yawn. Hell, you can even force a real yawn if you try without anyone being able to tell the difference.

The tick of each person is different. Some humans avoid eye contact when lying, other humans do it because they hate eye contact in general. Some humans remain calm under stress or pain while other humans become snappy they second they get a headache.

There are generalisation, of course. How else would you sell those "psychology tips and tricks to reading people" 15$ books? Like if a human isn't smiling they aren't happy.

But that's...bullshit actually. Diverging from the norm and social cues is not rare in humans. Be it from personal preference, personality or even just being neurodivergent.

Humans can show happiness without smiling, we can be sad without crying, we can endure pain without groaning, and we can perform any and all emotions authenticity. The more we try, the better at faking things we get. We can in theory do all of this.

Salarians can't, they have a lot of their own outer communication piloted by their unconscious brain that makes it involuntarily. A human can teach themselves to stop flinching when surprised and brute force an involuntarily habit away, a salarian can't.

And it makes sense for them why their brains locked them out of developer options when it comes to the settings of their own bodies. Much like our own brain prevents us from so many things because we can't be trusted with it. Having their social cues built in since birth and never having to struggle to fit in gives them more time to actually live their life. While humans have to go through the several phases of self discovery and endless crisis of why do I exist?

We slow blink back to cats, of course we are going to pay attention to each one of the alien races ticks and cues to replicate it back to them. Attempting to mimick a turian's purring while cuddling with them, learning to headbutt a krogan if we want to prove ourselves.

You know that phrase about giving a monkey a typewriter and eventually it will print hamlet out? That's humans figuring anything out. A thousand humans will attempt to replicate the salarians lying for safety cue and fail.

But eventually, something gotta give and one of us will make a dent. Like someone figuring out a new technique in a speedrunning community, at first only they can do it but eventually it will become the norm and standard expectation of every speedrunner to master.

Like there are some hardcore humans out there who learned to read and write in binary without a translator, imagine walking to a geth and having a casual chat in 1s and 0s.

Humans learn to mimick birds sounds, so well at times that we used it to capture them before by mimicking mating sounds. Human voice impressionists are a huge thing and there are so many of them.

If anything it's hard for us to live with the aliens without mimicking them, it's in our nature. Throw a human to the hanar long enough and they'll completely adapt to using "this one" when refering to themselves.

I do see some species hating it because we aren't all sugar and spice everything nice. We will use these things to cheat, lie and "hack" our way into their held by ducktape society rules.

Purring at turians to earn their trust quickly before betraying them. Using the lying for safety cue on salarians to get away with normal lies. Making the drell think our emotions are as strong and painfully concentrated as theirs to excuse some of our shitty behaviour that a normal human would call us out on.

Give us long enough and we will crack the asari code too. Figure out the loopholes in their justiciar's logic and use it to misguide them towards our selfish interests. Learn their whole song and dance to corner their government into giving the humans slack or else they lose face with the rest of their galaxy and their own people. Because the asari actually rely on a beautiful facade to keep peace amidst their people, much like elves shoot themselves in the foot by making their egos and worth based on the fact they're so much civilised and sophisticated than the rest.

I think the protheons would love it tho, or just javik in particular if you began mimicking him. He'll compliment you for finally deciding to evolve instead of remaining a degenerate primitive.

[wawamouse]

Oz Rewatch 3: S5E03: Dream a Little Dream of Me

Storylines

Miguel gets out of the hospital, scores are settled according to Morales; Jaime Velez wants to join Miguel; Miguel tells him to kill Chico

Rebadow wants Brass to buy a lottery ticket for him

Brass talks to McManus

Jia Kenmin returns to Oz; has an interaction session with Cyril; Li Chen arrives at Oz; tension with O’Reilys

Redding and Morales make a deal

Schibetta wants to take revenge and move against the Aryans; Said refuses to held; Peter confronts the Aryans alone as it raped again

Penders tries to cash in on a favor from Glynn and is rebuffed

Keller returns to Oz and is placed in PC; Keller is being investigated for the college kid killings

Said continues to struggle with anger; interaction session with Schillinger; Said tells Omar not to talk to Poet; Said catches Omar buying drugs from Poet; expressing an interest in singing, Omar gets a singing lesson

Sister Pete group counseling, Augustus sad about divorce

Bikers go to kill Cloutier but are stopped; Cloutier appears to Hoyt as a vision and tells him to kill Kirk; Hoyt stakes him in the stomach with a cross; Cloutier vanishes; Hoyt confesses to several murders

Sister: I hate his tattoo so much. Me: Yeah, and that’s a real one, too.

Sister: Why would your guy not be happy about scores being settled? Me: ‘Cause he just wants to bother Miguel, that’s why. Sister: Why doesn’t he go fight the white guys? Me: ‘Cause he just wants to bother Miguel. Sister: It doesn’t make sense… Me: He just wants to bother Miguel.

Sister: No, not that! It’s going to be too dangerous— Miguel: Kill Guerra. Sister: SEE, I told you! …Who’s Guerra? Is that your guy Me: 😑 He’s not my guy… Sister: What, he belongs to the streets? Me: 😑

Sister: I think he’s going to buy the lottery ticket and win and then he’s going to keep it for himself.

Me: He’s doing that Asian bullshitting thing right now, don’t you think? Sister: Totally… Pretending he reflected, LOL… Playing the Buddhist angle...

Sister: “Li Chen”? How lazy can you be? (It's a pretty generic name)

Sister: Jia Kenmin… why’s his name like that? Me: Yeah, it’s kind of old-fashioned. It’s like Daddy’s generation of names… Sister: No, I mean, they say it the Chinese way… Me: Oh, I know! I was literally wondering about that the other day!

Sister: His hair looks so bad. Me: Yeah, the length really accentuates his hairline in a bad way. Sister: It’s medieval squire length…. Me: It’s not doing him any favors… It looks good short, though. Sister: It’s not short, though, is it?

Sister: Not the butt pop… His booty muscles… Me: His butt’s definitely up there in the rankings…

Me: I wonder what determines whether they use the sinks here or their cells. Sister: Yeah, I’d just use the one in my cell. Especially because that guy (Augustus/Narrator) said that you could get shanked in the shower if you turn your back.

Me: I wonder if they only did this singing plot line for him because the actor was in The Five Heartbeats… Sister: What’s that? Me: It’s a mini-series about like this fictional motown group… The guy who played Jefferson Keane is also in it. Sister: Oh, then they definitely did it because of that.

Sister: Why would they put him here to guard a civilian? What’s he gonna do if a prisoner gets agitated? Hobble over? He should be on desk duty. Me: He didn’t want to be on desk duty. Sister: So? They need to put him on it anyway. And if he quits because he hates sitting at a desk too much, then their problems are solved anyway. They don’t have to worry about a liability and they don’t got to pay anything, either, ‘cause he quit himself…

Sister: She gets way too involved with her patients, man…

Sister: He’s risen and he’s hiding in the laundry room.

Stray Thoughts

The apparent gang tattoo on Jia Kenmin’s hand just says “blood” btw

Sister: The have the guy in the wheelchair talking about his wife again and still nothing from the Muslim guy whose wife was also on the bus…

[blakemcntgomery]

[BLAKE MONTGOMERY. 32. CIS MALE. HE/HIM] is here! They’ve lived in Asbury Park for [32 YEARS] and are originally from [ASBURY PARK, NEW JERSEY]. They are a [FRONT DESK CLERK AT ROSE MOTEL] and in their downtime love [TAX/IDENTITY FRAUD] and [DEEP RESEARCH]. They look a lot like [DAVID CORENSWET] and live in/on [OAKDALE]. The song that makes people think of them the most is [DEVIL’S ADVOCATE BY THE NEIGHBOURHOOD]. 

☆ playlist. ☆ pinterest. ☆ muse. ☆ connections.

━━ ⟢ the basics  full name → blake theodore montgomery birthday → 03/24/1992 big three  → aries sun, sagittarius moon, leo rising 🔥🔥🔥 height  → 6'4" mbti  → entj sexual orientation  → he's not picky 😔 hometown → asbury park, new jersey 

━━ ⟢ personality tidbits - in a nutshell, he's chaos - his emotions overrun his whole life, and it shows - also kinda has a mentality of if he wants to be something he can be without a degree because in the wider sense it's all bullshit and did the dinosaurs have college degrees in business  - that being said, he never sticks with anything long enough to see it through or be dedicated to it, he thinks there's too many options - unfortunately he does fall in love with strangers without knowing them knowing them, and once he does he gets very disappointed and is like “wow how did i miss such a big red flag” meanwhile he's over here looking like a 🚩himself - once a girl he was dating told him he always called people immature or that they were acting like a baby, but really it was him all along who was the immature baby, and that impact it had on him he spent everyday after that proving to himself that wasn't true - he's all about the hustle of getting money, no matter the means  - deep down he's always wondering what his real life purpose is, or if he even has one. he's always combatting himself internally  - he will randomly drop his own lore on people without them asking or saying - he struggles with existential crisis on a daily basis, but mostly about god because he's going back and forth on what the fuck is going on in the universe  - he lacks a filter, or says what everyone's thinking and thinks he's righteous for that  - he may ruin his relationships with everyone, but the one sacred thing in his life is his pets!!!! he loves dogs and cats, and he would die for them or kill for them, no questions asked - he dropped out because he thought he was smarter than his professor - he does what he can to get by because obviously working for a motel front desk doesn't pay all of the bills - whether that's aiding people in tax fraud, or any kind of fraud, intimidation tactics the list runs endlessly - most of the fraud he commits is from the people who check into the motel and it's more or less the skeevy people he can tell aren't the best individuals  - he thinks he wants to be in love, but when he gets into a relationship he's like oh no what the fuck have i done  - thrives when he's living in his own individuality and independence  - screws over a lot of people who were nothing but good to him, friends, relationships, family - deep down he struggles with thinking he's a loser, and he does think about everyone he's ever done wrong, even if he never talks to them about it, or apologizes for what he's done, let alone admit he's done anything wrong - but also he never takes anything super seriously he's like okay calm down we're literally on a floating rock and he disguises his pain with jokes

━━ ⟢ go deeper tw: fire, death, drugs - one of his first core memories is having his feelings invalidated and laughed at by his entire family, from that point on he started to hide his raw emotions.  - he was born into a family of mostly sisters  - i would say he's the black sheep of his family, and the family disappointment wrapped up in one - his family is well off, but they disowned blake when he dropped out of college and he scrapes by because he refuses to go and beg for their help  - his mom and dad are well known psychotherapists and authors, but unfortunately they based most of their writing off of blake  - his parents treated him more like a case study than their child  - they would do things to trigger his reaction, get rid of his pets without so much a warning  - the one time he thought he was having a genuine moment with his dad, he hadn't realized his dad bugged the room to record it and analyze it for data  - after his family cut him off of money, he recklessly broke into their house, robbed them of everything, and set the house on fire, including their cars, etc.  - he hadn't known his sister was inside the house, he purposefully waited outside until he thought everyone was out of the house  - his parents tried to save her as soon as they got back home from dinner, it resulted in his parents being trapped in a room after a beam fell and blocked the door resulting in third degree burns on various parts of their body.  - blake didn't go see them in the hospital, he ran, he laid low for awhile and waited for it all to pass. he paid someone for an alibi, he destroyed any evidence tying it back to him - the following day when his parents and siblings were trying to get ahold of him, he ignored it. he took the money he stole from them and spent it on drugs in a club to try and forget all about it.  - what he didn't know is they were trying to tell him his sister had died from the fire - he didn't go to her funeral, instead he spiraled into what he already knew everyone else thought of him anyway. 

━━ ⟢ connections like i said on sunny's!!! i want all the connections, old classmates, exes, crushes, people he's scammed, people he's worked for to do illegal things for, friends, foes, enemies, people he's robbed, neighbors, people who've checked into the motel, cousins, co workers, situationships, etc etc etc i need it all !!!

[dracocheesecake]

THOUGHTS ARE BREWING ABOUT REWRITING KFP4

Brace for impact cause I’ve been ruminating for weeks on how to redo it because like, there’s so many directions you could take it. BUT IM THINKING OF AN INTERESTING WAY TO REWRITE THE CHAMELEON AND AUGHHH I MUST BLAB

Cause obviously it’s a bullshit thing that her excuse for being evil is that she wasn’t allowed to know kung fu because she’s too small. We all know its dumb with Shifu, Mantis, and literally Master Chicken existing. BUT YOU KNOW WHAT ISNT STUPID? The womanly coded rage of “I don’t need to be good, I need to be GREAT” and like sure its not like a characteristic of female rage but when that thought process is within a woman it takes on a whole different kinda tone compared to a man. Miss Chameleon who, while living in a universe where there isn’t really overt sexism, still feels overlooked by all the men around her.

In my rewrite of her story, not only would she have known kung fu, but she would have been a master herself. But her problem (like the running themes of all the kfp villains which ties her to the bunch we’ve seen already) is that she wants for more than is her lot in life. Her flaw is that she can’t live in mediocrity. She can’t accept that the skills she has developed are the best she’s ever going to get. Especially when it’s not garnering the same attention from others the way Master Ox or Master Bear have. It develops this intense superiority complex and innate jealousy within her that she feels she pales in comparison to her colleagues. Which leads to her trying to copy their styles. It doesn’t work, people shame her for trying to be a copycat.

So, she tries a different approach, and see if there’s any new skills she can develop. And wouldn’t you know, she’s heard of all the tales of Master Oogway and his spiritual powers and you know, he invented Kung Fu and is known and loved far and wide, so he had to have done something right! So, she tries to learn chi. She fails. Or, in her mind, she fails. It’s not as strong as she wants it to be, again, working but living in mediocrity. She wants to stand out, she wants to shine.

So, Master Chameleon disappears mysteriously from the kung fu world. Nobody knows where she went or what happened to her, but her village checked her training grounds and all of her pupils (the iguanas/lizards we see fighting for her) are just. Gone. Deserted.

That’s when she pops up in Juniper City. A place that doesn’t know anything about kung fu or its masters, a city she can make entirely for herself. She presents herself to the government/council, introducing herself as the solution to all the crime running rampant through the place, and proves herself by actually showing off her intelligence and skills at apprehending and beating the criminals. It’s not long before she’s hailed as a savior to the city and has the council paying tribute to her and building her her own fortress so that she can train others (in reality, she makes her training intentionally too cruel on the people in the city who volunteered to learn to discourage them so she could sweetly suggest she ask her pupils back at her side) to defend the city more strongly.

She’s basically the kingpin of the city now. She’s manipulated the council into doing whatever she wants. And all along she’s making deals with the criminal overlords for more money and glory and such. The only ones who don’t bow to her is The Den, due to their structure being more familial rather than hierarchal. They fought a lot because of this power struggle, and similar to that drabble you wrote, The Chameleon would be brutal, taking the lives of their friends and such, to the point where the neutral point is Han taking what’s left of his community under ground to keep them protected, and Chameleon considers them too puny to waste her time when she’s got bigger goals.

Namely, Zhen. Zhen was a consequence of all the fighting done, the last victim from The Den so to speak. Only, the little fox wasn’t killed. Similarly to the movie, Chameleon notices her drive and skill and decides she’s worth the time to apprentice, and she needs something to busy herself with, because in the meantime, she’s basically inventing sorcery.

Using chi the way it has been used didn’t work for her. But she heard through the grapevine about Po’s battle with General Kai, how he perverted chi for his own gain, which gave her an idea. She wasn’t going to do it the way Kai had, she didn’t just want the power of their energy, she wanted to take everything from everyone who thought they were above her. Their soul, their skills, their everything. This thought process leads to her true plans and motivations: to be the only kung fu master.

She’s still having some troubles working out the kinks of her sorcery while she trains Zhen, grows close to the little fox. Only, Zhen isn’t like her other students. She’s trained them to be competent, sharp and know their jobs, but Zhen was pushed farther, and took things farther. And once again, that burning jealousy took root in Chameleon as she saw her pupil flourish more than she originally thought capable. There was pride of course at first, molding Zhen to her ideals and image. But the fox turned from student to competition as she began to experiment with her own style. In turn, Chameleon experimented on her. Zhen wasn’t expecting it, but when called to her, Chameleon threw her beta tested move at her…and it worked. That trick we saw in the movie, only it took everything from Zhen, and by the end of it…there was nothing left of her. All of her spirit, skills and even appearance was given solely to the Chameleon. She can only shapeshift into the people she’s absorbed in my rewrite. She hadn’t fully expected it to work, and a small, miniscule part of her felt guilty for doing that to her dearest little pupil who trusted her so blindly. But it opened a gateway for her.

And yeah! I won’t go into everything because I’ve talked so very much but omg I needed to get this out. And it’s necessary, because there are two running themes with kfp villains: they are greedy for more in some twisted goal, and they end up hurting somebody very close to them, there’s always betrayal somewhere. Tying that into her story makes her feel like she’s an actual villain of this universe in my head.

(Sorry this took so long to answer I had to get my thoughts together because OH BOY-)

Holy smokes this is all genuinely so, so good and a hundred times better than what we ended up getting. Because first of all: you turned the Chameleon into a character, instead of just a villain. Not to mention you gave her a motive that gives her complexity and makes her actually interesting (and the audience can't justify, but understand why she's doing what she's doing!). AND YOU MADE HER SCARY! An actual, serious threat! That imagery the description of poor Zhen's fate this conjures is spine-chilling. I wouldn’t mind seeing this version of the Chameleon on screen!

Also the way it actually follows the lore and continuity of the previous movies in a way that makes sense! The running theme of "being the best you you can be"- in this sense, her version is a twisted version of Po's journey; wanting to be the best version of herself...at the cost of all others! I could go on, but yeah this is an awesome rewrite idea!!!

[twsthc]

scarabia angst headcanons 🌞💔

⚠️ warnings: food anxiety, self destructive behavior, possible OCD triggers, kalim

last updated: july 30, 2023

KALIM AL-ASIM 🦦

has C-PTSD from the constant threat of death

mostly gets nightmares, flashbacks, anxious, etc of when he was poisoned and kidnapped or when jamil was poisoned "for" him

has coughed up blood, has seen jamil cough up blood

really tries to hide how much it still gets him so he doesnt worry anyone

super light sleeper. a cockroach tap the wall and his eyes would fly open

has food anxiety

needs someone to test the food before he does, or he needs to know jamil prepared it or he wont eat it

after his first time getting poisoned he wouldnt eat jamils cooking either

after jamil's OB, he stopped cooking and contacting kalim and things really spiraled out of control

stopped eating/drinking anything until he was forced to

was literally bmi 0.001 until a teacher had to step in and force some goat cheese down his throat

parents would pay for material items for their kids but not therapy

i think kalim might have done some crazy shit to make his parents notice him out of the quintillion other kids they have

also he was raised by servants instead of his own mother

because of all this Mental Illness (specifically C-PTSD) he does get panic attacks, as one with anxiety disorders does

he uses pain to ground himself in stressful moments (mostly his nails)

digs them into his palms or thighs, whatever hes closer to

or he scratches himself until he refocuses

got especially bad after jamils ob. imagine the person who kept u safe and basically raising u coming out and saying he secretly hated u

me personally i would kms

probably cries himself to sleep

type of fellow to be super happy one moment then hear a sad/soft song then become svicidal (me when im having a great day then hear any song by Lamp)

JAMIL VIPER 🐍

fully believe jamil has NPD

after growing up in an environment where he was put behind everyone else, his brain desperately needed to be put first

its really hard to find good symptoms of this disorder without seeing bullshit like "10 signs your partner is a narcissist" omfg

some ACTUAL symptoms of a narcassistic disorder (for jamil):

he has poor coping skills, often projects his anger onto others, has trouble maintaining relationships, often requires praise or he might feel obsolete/depressed

too good at hiding his feelings even in shitty situations

has boiling anger issues but is able to keep them repressed (at his own cost)

after his OB, he distanced himself from kalim to process

after 2-ish weeks, they talked it out and set some boundaries

the first week jamil didnt force-wake kalim up, kalim was consistently late to all her earlier classes and struggled a shit ton with work loads

she couldnt even pick out her own outfits without jamil going "that ones fine, now hurry up" every few seconds

had to establish that kalim needed to learn how to live without jamils coddling

kalim agreed ofc but still felt a little lonely without her usual schedule

also has anxiety from being poisoned, and still has lingering memories of being so worried when kalim was kidnapped

i also think jamil has OCD :3

"if i dont do ABC then kalim with XYZ"

has other impulses (flicking lights on and off, needing to feel "even" on both sides)

i hope someone w ocd reads this and understands wtf im talking about

when someone steps on your foot so you have to step on the other one or youll throw up because you dont feel the same amount of pain on both sides

[emeraldspiral]

Again, no offense if you like domestic fluff, but I just think the idea of it is kinda funny when you consider one of the main foundational jokes of Invader Zim is that Zim's so stupid he thinks going to public skool is a good use of his time on earth. So it's like, almost kind of appropriate that he'd give up his mission to live happily ever after on earth with Dib and still think it's a good idea to follow him into hi skool and not a complete waste of time. Like, he could be doing literally anything else and he willingly decides to subject himself to the public education system like Edward Cullen. And then what happens after he and Dib graduate? Does Zim get a normal human job or just become a house husband while Dib struggles to find actual paying work as a paranormal investigator, still fighting the same battles he was as a 12-year-old to prove things to a public that still refuses to believe any evidence no matter how rock solid?

IDK man, I just feel like with all the social commentary in the show painting earth as a dystopia where neither Dib or Zim fit in anywhere a happy ending with them living normal lives on earth could never be achieved. Even if they were happy with themselves and each other, they still wouldn't be able to connect with the rest of humanity, they'd still be frustrated by all the stupid bullshit surrounding them and they'd still have access to so many resources to be able to do more fulfilling things with their lives that transcend the confines of a path made by and for people they can barely relate to.

[mx-pokirby]

Okay pls listen

I keep thinking about this, and I don't have a Monolith Soft/Platinum/Atlus-size team nor budget, so making my own dream game will have to wait, and a Tumblr post will have to suffice

Breaking the 4th wall is nothing new.

Theater shows where performers speak directly to the audience. Films that emphasis the viewers' roles as voyeurs to elevate the art. Games that dissect the nature of protagonism, using the medium to create ludonarrative harmony.

All good and deserving even more be made.

Yet in that final case, I feel there's often a disconnect in assuming the level of responsibility the game expects of you in "controlling someone against their will".

The protagonist will clearly be upset at you like "How dare you be here, controlling me? This is all your fault. Fuck you." and you kinda just gotta sit there like "Damn, sorry I guess but I didn't make any of this happen, buddy. I just held W and tried my best to help. If I left then literally everything would remain still. None of this is on me."

Cuz your expected to at least suspend your disbelief hard enough to forget that the game has a Creator(s) in the first place.

It's like a long-running mystery where you're supposed to just pretend there's no Supreme Mastermind. Everything just happens to be "like this" and you + your character just both gotta cope.

What I, as a creator, want to see is more works that actually call attention to that. About dissecting the concept of the Artist's role from within the Art itself.

There's so much potential in flipping the interrogation light inwards, to ask what forces motivated the Artist to create their world the specific way they ultimately chose, and have that be a key element in what the narrative is about.

Tangent time.

In my teens, I had an RPG Maker phase. I never made enough progress to release anything, but I was familiar enough with the program. Something about the process of making a game in RPG Maker is how easily I slipped into having fun just making up Skills and Items and whatnot. Just toss in some numbers, select an Effect, and write an endearing yet informative description.

In universe, characters may have to go through life-changing struggles to earn these dangerous powers which could upend their very worlds.

Yet you, the creator, are also able to create both their challenges & rewards with the ease of a keystroke. And any limitations thereof are purely choice, because Game Balance and Plot Structure is an expectation, but importantly not a hard rule.

Your paying audience may care about sudden nonsensical bullshit, but the characters within the narrative would certainly not care about any of the above as long as they can return to living peacefully ASAP. Conflict.

Allow me to give an example that's been occupying my brainspace as of late.

Skill Target: Self Type: Heal Effect (1): Heal HP - 100% Effect (2): Remove - All Debuffs Effect (3): Apply - Omni Buff Effect (4): Gain Status - Invincible Skill Learned At: Level 1 Skill Cost: 0 MP Skill Name: Lift Finger Description: Even if you can no longer stand, as long as the fire inside is still burning, you can find the strength to keep going and face any odds

In a story self-aware of its own mechanics, anyone can effectively obtain Godhood for nothing, and characters would have to grapple with that.

Especially in a work that gives similar/the same (even if stripped down) tools or creation / customization to the player that the creator(s) made the game with. Your Mario Makers, Little Big Planets, Mugen, Cladun, Magical High School Girl (ok maybe not technically but it still deserves a shoutout), anything that runs on Source.

I think a game that wants to tell a story deconstructing / dissecting the act of creation, while using its medium to the best of its ability, would need to require player creation be a core gameplay element.

Partly because, when you're given the freedom to implement overpowered Free Win Button nonsense like the example above, what's stopping you from pushing everything to the extreme?

Only arbitrary, socially/self-enforced rules, and the blurry bounds of what's actually possible. The same limitations as the Creator.

And if the power to Create is given not only to the player, but narratively something anyone can do, then all it takes is one person who values their own self-interest above the arbitrary rules for the rules to truly stop mattering, and everything gets out of hand. A mad-dash. Where the only reason to Create is to be as Extreme as possible. To make only The Most. So you're the best, and nothing can be better than you, nothing can knock you down.

There will still be those attempting to play by the rules, but they're a small few surviving against the odds. That drive to carve a meta out of a system never intended to have one. Assigning order to the chaos.

Only by looking back at the base fundamentals which everyone has elected to ignore can you really put everything into perspective.

Like

You see the points I'm making here, right? The reflections?

There's so many angles to take this initial concept from that I'm just enamored by. And while I'm not even certain I've done an acceptable job at trying to explain / justify this potential that I've been obsessing over, (this post (and my brain) has been cooking for two days and I'm tired), I hope I've at least scratched the surface for others to be inspired by too.

And on that note, I leave with one final piece of wisdom.

There is significantly high untapped artistic potential in the concept of the Self-Insert.

Fuck we gotta rewatch Re:CREATORS