#not the best at explaining it right now I’m sorry haha
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eddiesxangel · 11 months ago
Note
Hey!
I’m really bad at explaining stuff so bare with me haha😂
I was thinking that reader is a virgin and has never even kissed anyone, then she starts dating Eddie and he’s her first everything…
Then someday while they’re having sex, Wayne walks in on them and then he tries to talk to them about being safe and something like that 😅
The Sweet Days in the Shire | Eddie Munson x F!Reader
omg, this is so heavily inspired by my own experience...Are you in my walls? this is literally my experience with my current bf now...How did you know?!
Word count: 7.2k oops
Cw: This is NOT a fic about corruption kink. Angst, fluff, f!reader, readers first time (oral, fingering, p in v penetration) , reader and Eddie are 22. Happy ending 🤭
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*Five years ago*
"I'm going to die alone," You groaned.
Were you being dramatic? Yes. But you were seventeen and truly felt like the most undesirable girl. No one had ever shown any interest in you. Your best guy friend, Eddie, was trying to convince you otherwise.
You had known Eddie since first grade but only got to know him once you went into tenth grade.
"Come on, don't be like that" Eddie spoke.
You were hanging out in the Shire, a.k.a. Eddie's bedroom, reviewing the new DND campaign, making sure there were no significant loopholes the others could get through.
"It's true! No guy had ever liked me like that, or if they have, they're all weird, and I don't like them back... Remember Lorne? He told me he liked me out of the blue when I hadn't spoken one word to him.'"
Eddie chuckled.
"It's not funny, Eddie! What was I supposed to say? I hardly knew the guy."
"I'm sorry. You're right. It's not funny." But he was still laughing.
"Ugggggggh," you rested your head back in defeat.
"So what if non of these shitty high school guys aren't interested? You're way out of their league."
"You're just saying that as my best friend."
"I'm really not. They are all douchebags or interested in anything other than getting a girlfriend."
"What about you?"
"What about me?"
"Where do you fall in that line?"
"I'm different." He smirked.
All you could do was roll your eyes. Of course, Eddie was different. He was Eddie. Your Eddie. Eddie, who you sprung a teeny tiny crush on within the last couple of months.
"I feel like such a loser, Eds. I'm seventeen and haven't even had my first kiss." You admit, softly.
"What?" This caught Eddie by surprise.
"You heard me." You mumbled.
"Impossible."
"Well, I'm not lying." You snap.
"Don't believe you"
"Well, you don't think I would have told you if some guy came up to me and planted one on me?" You folded into yourself. Succumbing to your self-depreciation.
Why didn't he believe you? Was it really that hard to believe that you were such a loser that no one has even ever tried to kiss you?
"Okayyy. So what if I helped you with that?" he pushed you back up.
"What?"
"I mean-shit- you obviously don't have to; you probably don't want to kiss me. We are just friends. But if you want to get it over with, you can...-I can help you." He rambled.
"Okay," You answered without thinking. You've wanted to kiss Eddie for months. You wanted him to be your first.
"Yea?"
You nodded your head, afraid of what might come out of your mouth next.
"Uh-okay"
You both shift, so you're facing one another. You don't move, unsure of how to approach this. Eddie was much more experienced than you. He probably already lost his virginity at this point. But the two of you never spoke about that.
So here you were, sitting on his bedroom floor, with your eyes closed, like a statue, until Eddie leaned in. You felt his warm, plush lips against yours. Butterflies soared in your stomach. It was just like everyone always described it to be. You felt the connection, that spark. The kiss felt like it lasted hours when, in reality, it was nothing more than a peck. But as far as first kisses go, you were convinced it was the best.
"Wow," you let slip when he pulled away.
Eddie chuckled softly and leaned back on the bed like nothing had happened.
Your stomach dropped at the realization that you and Eddie were, in fact, just friends. He didn't feel the connection you had.
"Thanks," you managed to get out without your voice cracking in disappointment.
"Anytime, Pip." He smiled and then went back to the DND campaign...
To add more salt to your wound, Eddie was arm-in-arm with Veronica a week later. Eddie had never even mentioned interest in her. You spoke every day. You never once hear him display any interest in a girl... another girl when not even six days ago he was kissing you in his bedroom. And that's when you decided to distance yourself from Eddie Munson.
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*Present Day*
After a very long four years of college out of state, you were back in your hometown of Hawkins, Indiana. Freshly twenty-two, you finally blossomed into the young woman you were meant to be. At college, you got to find yourself and your people. Once you had found your confidence, you grew into yourself. You had got a haircut that flattered your face and styled yourself with clothes that made you feel comfortable and confident. Before, it used to be all-black jeans and band tees that hid your figure. But now you find wearing skirts, dresses, and colo!
You used to be a late bloomer, but now you have gained many life experiences. However, you still need help in the love department. Your college years had been your party girl era, for sure. However, nothing ever went past a makeout session in the bar because you weren't like that... you wanted to have sex with someone you trusted, who you loved. Not some random stranger.
So here you were, back home in the early days of summer, and you were out job hunting. You'd been out on Main Street, in and out of stores, looking to see who was hiring, handing out your resume for about half an hour.
The sun was scorching for this time of year, causing you to start sweating and feel uncomfortable without air conditioning. As you walked by the local record store, you noticed they were advertising a job opening, and it felt like fate. You breathed a sigh of relief as you stepped inside the cool store. The door chimes jingled, announcing to anyone who was around that a customer had arrived. The store appeared empty, with not a soul in sight.
"Hello?" Your voice filled the empty air. "Hello?" You repeated once again a minute later with no reply.
"I'm here to apply for the job?" You peek around the back of the counter. As you looked over, you noticed a slightly open door. A figure passed by, but they didn't seem to notice you.
You respectfully waited a few more minutes but were becoming impatient. You decided to round the back of the counter and knock on the door labelled Staff Only.
"Excuse me." You knock and push it open a little further so you can see inside the staff room.
You notice a young man facing away from you, wearing headphones covering his ears. The loud guitar and bass sound emanates from the headphones. It's no surprise that he couldn't hear you.
"Excuse me?" You say a little louder, but it doesn't seem helpful. You sigh and walk up to him, hoping he doesn't take a swing at you for sneaking up on him.
Apprehensively, you tap the man's shoulder twice before stepping back quickly before they can react.
"What the fuck?" They rip off the headphones, and your stomach drops as you recognize the voice. Your prediction is confirmed as Eddie turns around with a frightened look on his face.
"You can't be back h-" He cuts himself when the reality of who he was talking to hits him.
"Eddie?" you cock your head in curiosity.
"Oh my God, Pippin?" he smiled brightly.
It had been four years since the last time you saw him. You briefly crossed paths in the hallways of Hawkins High, but the two of you hadn't spoken more than a sentence to each other since the day he kissed you. It was nice to hear his voice again.
"Hi," You smiled.
Eddie swore he heard angels singing when you spoke. You looked different, good, but different. More confident. More like yourself.
"What are you doing here?" He asked.
"Trying to apply for the job posting. I've been waiting ten minutes in the store calling out for someone like a moron." You giggled.
"Shit, sorry, I was just on my break." He scratched the back of his head, letting his bicep flex in his tight band tee.
You tried your best not to stare at him, but your attraction to Eddie lingered. He looked really good, having filled out more and grown out more facial hair than he had in high school. He still, however, had his pretty wavy locks. They were just a bit shorter than you were used to.
"Oh, sorry, I can come back later."
"No!" He blurted out. "I mean, it's really good to see you..."
"It's nice seeing you too; it's been a long time," you shy.
"Yeah" He sighed.
"So are you the person I need to talk to about the job or..." You try to fill the awkward silence.
"Shit, yeah, I guess so. I'm, uh, the manager." He cleared his throat.
"Wow, manager, very impressive! Moving on up in the world, Munson," You laugh.
"Watch is missy; you want the job or not?" He slung his arm around your shoulder and walked you back out to the front of the store.
You couldn't help the shiver that broke through your body when his arm made contact with you. It didn't help that he also smelled delicious.
"Well, if it means I get to work alongside you? ... Yeah, I want it," You flirt.
"Oh, I see buttering up an old confidant for a job." He smirked.
"Things with Eddie returned to normal as if nothing had ever changed. Like you never left. Like he never kissed you, then broke your naive teenage heart.
"Well, the job is yours if you want it." He smiled.
"Just like that?" You ask in shock.
"Just like that. I don't wanna go through all that paperwork and boring questions. I know you, trust you. It's full-time. $5.50 an hour. So it's yours if you think you can stand working with me daily."
"I think I can manage that."
"Great. We can start training tomorrow at 10:00am."
"Deal." You reached out to shake his hand, but Eddie only stared at it like you were crazy.
"Come on, Pippin, a handshake? Who do you think I am? Bring it in." He opened his arms up to embrace you in a hug.
Pippin. No one but Eddie called you that. It was a nickname he gave you in the tenth grade because you were smaller than him... He said Pippin was the best hobbit from his favourite book.
"You know I could have robbed the store, and you wouldn't have known a thing," you quip, trying to play off the way your breath hitched when you embraced him.
Your hormones would have to chill if you were going to work together.
"That's why security cameras were invented, sweetheart."
"Oh," You shied away. You weren't as clever as you had thought.
"I'll see you tomorrow," he guides you out the door.
"Bye, Eddie." You smile.
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Over the next three weeks, you and Eddie picked up where you had left off all those years ago. Things were good, great even. The flame that had been blown out was brought back to life and hotter than ever. There was an extreme tension between the two of you.
However, you both were avoiding the elephant in the room. It was fine until it wasn't. It was eating at Eddie. He loved having you back, but needed to know why you left and ended the friendship.
You were stocking up the new supply of jazz cassettes that came in when you felt Eddie come up behind you.
"Hey, so -uh- what happened?" he leaned back on the shelving, as he crossed his arms.
"What do you mean?" you chirp. Did you do something wrong? Was the till not even?
"With us, I mean, one day we were best buds, and then the next you were just... gone. I really missed you."
Oh, so we are having this conversation. You knew it was inevitable.
"You mean you really don't know?"
"Know what?"
"God, men are dumb," you mumbled under your breath.
"Hey! I heard that"
"Good." You deadpan.
Eddie stared at you blankly.
"You kissed me, Eddie. That meant something to me. Then you were with Veronica a week later..."
"Woah, woah, woah, woah, woah, what?" Eddie's eyes went wide with confusion.
"Eddie..." You sighed. This conversation was giving you a headache.
"Pip, I didn't? I wouldn't. I-"
"Forget it, Eddie. It was a long time ago."
"Did you like me or something?" He genuinely asked.
"Or something," You mumbled back.
"Pip, I'm sorry I didn't know... I had no idea you liked me like that. I would have never offered to kiss you if I had known. I never wanted to lead you on."
"It's okay, Eddie. We were seventeen. I eventually got over it, but I had to not be around you to do that. I'm sorry I ran away... I missed you. Like a lot."
"Pip-" Eddie began, but a customer was ready to be rung up at the counter.
The rest of the day was busy, and your shift ended before Eddie's did today. So you quickly said goodbye and waited to talk to him the next day.
Eddie needed to make things right between you. What you had once was so good, and now it seems to be even better than before. Eddie was becoming infatuated with you. He got excited to go to work when you were on schedule. He loved making you laugh; seeing that beautiful smile across your face was his favourite pastime. He could have had that all these years, but it was all ruined for some hot piece of ass Eddie got for a few weeks in their senior year.
Eddie had met Veronica in his grade twelve English class. She was way out of his league, so when she agreed to go out with him, he was only thinking with his dick.
He was thinking about her and how she would be on his knees for him when he kissed you for funsies. He was not thinking about how it would have affected you. He was a selfish teenage boy being controlled by his hormones. Because of that, Eddie was now facing the consequences of his actions all because he wanted to get his dick wet in the twelfth grade.
“Hey Pip, can I talk to you for a sec?” Eddie greeted you when he walked in for his shift mid-afternoon.
“Sure what’s up?” Things were a little rocky since yesterday and you didn’t know where you stood.
God what was this so hard? Why did you make him nervous?
“I uh. I was hoping we could hang out… you know. Outside of work. If you wanted. I wanted to make up for being an ass.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah.
"Okay." you smiled.
"Awesome! We are both off on Friday… I made sure.” Eddie said with a goofy smile. God, you were so falling for him again.
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You and Eddie have been spending time together outside work every chance you have had for the past six months. He invited you to see your old high school crowd the first few times, and then it slowly became more one-on-ones. Unfortunately for you, your ever-growing crush on Eddie had come back and was stronger than ever.
You hated yourself for falling for him again, but you couldn't help yourself. He was just so charming, boisterous, funny, and not to mention the most attractive man you've seen. Eddie was a natural flirt; he always was throwing compliments your way. He always knew how to make you blush.
That evening during closing, Eddie offered you to come over to The Shire. a.k.a his trailer. After a long, tiring day, both of you wanted some relaxation. He suggested staying in and having a cozy evening with pizza, beers, and perhaps a little weed to escape the cold November weather.
As the night progressed, it began to snow, and a snowstorm was predicted for later in the evening.
"Do you want your usual order, Pip?" Eddie turned his head to glance at you. You were standing near the front door, taking off your hat, scarf, and jacket. As he was watching you, he got lost in your graceful movements. Suddenly, he realized he was staring at you and almost bumped into his fridge.
"Yeah," you shiver. You almost thought about putting your coat back on, but that would be silly. "Can I borrow a sweater or a blanket?" You asked sweetly.
"Of course, sweetheart." Eddie didn't miss the way your nipples perked out of your low-cut t-shirt when you wrapped your arms around yourself, trying to warm up, but it only emphasized your breasts.
"Where is Wayne tonight?" You asked.
"He has an overnight shift tonight; he probably just left not too long ago." He said as he disappeared into his bedroom to find you a clean hoodie.
"I'm sorry, I missed him; I haven't seen that guy in years." You huffed. You loved Wayne; he was like a second dad.
"Yeah, he keeps talking you up like I don't already know how amazing you are." He threw the black hoodie at your head.
"Hey!"
I just gave you my sweater and a compliment, I think you should be thanking me."
"Shut up and order the pizza before the storm, Munson." You laugh as you pull the sweater over your head.
You and Eddie settled in, splitting a six-pack of cheap beer and delicious pizza. You wanted to watch a movie after dinner, so Eddie found a few stashed away that he still had yet to return to Family Video.
"How do you feel about horror?" He wiggled his eyebrows.
"You know I don't like scary movies, Eds." You whine.
"Well, hate to break it to you, sweetcheeks, but this is all we got, so it's either this... or cable that will most likely be down within the next half hour if the weather keeps up." You glanced out the window, and if you didn't leave now, you were not making it home tonight. The storm had started a lot earlier than anticipated.
"Oh shit, it's awful out. I didn't think it would be this bad so soon! I should go... shit, I've been drinking, we both have! We can't drive!" You started freaking out.
"Pip, you can always crash here. I don't mind." He offered.
"Are you sure?" You twiddled with the drawstrings of the hoodie.
"Of course! You think I would let you go out there?"
"Well... no."
"We can share my bed". He said nonchalantly.
Was he insane?! You can share a bed... with him... you'll want to do things with him. You can't take the rejection again.
"Umm."
"Well, I would sleep on the pull-out couch by Wayne sleeps there."
"It's okay... we are both adults," You swallowed. "Hey, do you have any more beer?" You needed a drink. Desperately.
"Oh, so we are having one of those nights? Edie wiggled his brows at you, and you rolled your eyes in return.
"I need liquid courage for these movies you're going to put me through," You fibbed.
"Don't worry, Pip. I'll protect you."
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Two movies and many screams later, you called it. You were maxed out on the spooky stuff. Halloween was long gone, and you were supposed to be in Christmas mode.
"You can get ready for bed first. I'll follow after. Eddie offered.
You slipped into Edie's hoodie and got under the covers, realizing the sweater was long enough to be worn as a nightgown. Eddie would be none the wiser that you had forgone pants.
You called for Eddie to enter, and he got ready for bed. You tried to pretend to occupy yourself as you watched Eddie get undressed and ready for bed. He pulled his plaid pyjama pants over his boxers and forgone a shirt.
There was tension in the air, but neither of you said anything. You held your breath as Eddie turned off the bedroom light and felt the bed dip as he got in.
"Pip?" Eddie broke the silence moments later.
"Yeah?"
"Can I ask you something?'
"Sure."
"Did you ever date anyone when you went away?"
"No"
"No?"
"Well...I went on one date, and he was shorter than me..." You laughed at how ridiculous it was. You didn't even like him, but you felt bad because you agreed to give him your number when you were out dancing one night, and you'd consumed a little too much alcohol.
"How is that even possible?"
"Well, you see, Edward everyone has different heights an-"
"No, you doofus," he laughed. "how is it possible you never dated anyone? You're beautiful." He says like it’s obvious.
Eddie made you feel fluttery when he called you beautiful.
“What?”
“You’re beautiful, Pip," Eddie repeated. "You’re a total catch; how are you still single?”
“Guess I never met the right guy…”
“Oh... " It was quiet for a moment then Eddie spoke again. "I know you always said you uh- wanted to you know…. Wait for the right guy and all… so have you slept with anyone since you were gone?”
“Eddie!” you cry, covering your face with your hands. You’re so mortified by this conversation.
“I’m sorry! Can’t blame a guy for his morbid curiosity.” you could hear the smirk in his voice.
“I can’t believe you remembered that. I mentioned it once six years ago.”
“I remember every thing when it comes to you.”
You felt his fingers intertwine with yours.
“Eddie…” you whisper.
“Yea”
"Ask me again."
"Are you still a virgin?"
You let out a deep sigh before you answered. “I’ve given it a lot of thought. And I want you to be my first.” you blurt out at a mile a minute.
“Pippin-”
“Just don’t go off with another girl next week or else I’m going to have to quit” you chuckle uncomfortably.
“Are you sure? Because if we start this I’m never going to want to let you go… not ever again.” He rolled over to face you.
“I’m so sure, Eddie, you’re the only one I’ve ever wanted.” You rolled to face him.
You didn’t know where this bravery was coming from. Maybe it was the combination of alcohol and being in the dark, but something sparked inside of you that you couldn’t put out.
“Can I kiss you?”
“Please”
You both moved in tandem as your lips collided. Years, months, weeks, days, hours, and minutes that all lead you to this moment, this perfect moment. Eddie and you always belonged together.
“I missed you so much,” Eddie spoke into your mouth as he shifted to hover over you.
“I missed you too. I missed you so much.” You grabbed for him, to touch and feel him. Your hands gripped his hair at the back of his head.
“Baby,” Eddie sat up and slinked his hands under his sweatshirt up your bare middle.
Baby. Goosebumps spread across your body from his touch. His calloused fingers lightly scratched your soft skin, and his hands travelled further up until his fingertips grazed your breasts.
“Can I take this off?”
“Yes,” The temperature in the room suddenly increased, making you feel extremely hot. The hoodie you were wearing became suffocating.
“Sit up for me, baby. Arms up.” You obliged and felt nervous that you were basically naked in front of Eddie. You pull your arms out of the sweater and cover yourself immediately.
“No, baby, please, don’t hide from me.” He gently peels your arms away from your body. “Beautiful,” He whispers with eyes full of lust.
You reached out to cup his face so you could kiss him again. You needed to distract yourself from the fact that you were naked in front of someone for the first time. Your kisses felt rushed and needy like you would die without them.
"Slow down, Pip, we have all the time in the world." Eddie coxed you back down into the plush pillows of his bed. "I'm going to take good care of you. okay?"
You nod your head yes to let him know you understand. The room was dark, but the street light peaked through the blinds. You could hear your heartbeat along with the howl of the wind from the snowstorm. You looked over to the clock. It read 12:18am. Wayne won't be home until early morning, at least 6:00am, especially in a storm like this.
Eddie leaned forward to kiss you again, travelling his lips down your body with each peck. His mouth found your neck, and he sucked on it, making your hips jerk up into him. You could feel his erection against your leg, which only excited you more.
He made his way lower once satisfied with the marking he left on your skin. He nipped and licked and peppered your sensitive chest before latching his mouth around a perked nipple. How Eddie fantasized about this very moment for months. To him, your boobs were perfect. The way your soft skin felt under his tongue, it was like they were made for him.
You let out a squeak, embarrassed by the noises you held back. You didn't know if this was normal? To want to make sounds while Eddie's mouth discovered your body.
"Don't be shy, baby. You can let it go. Get loud. I want to hear you."
"Are you sure, Eddie? Is that like... normal?"
"Oh god, yes, it's like music to my ears... Would it make you feel better if I shared with you what I like?"
"Yes."
"Okay, well." He clasped your hand, intertwining your fingers as he rested his chin on your upper stomach. "I like it when the person I'm with makes noises; it lets me know I'm doing well. I like it when the person I'm with takes compliments and praises. I like it when the person I'm with calls me certain names, but we will save that for another time. And I like it when I get to be in charge... like right now."
"What kind of names?" You bite your lower lip.
"Ah ah, naughty girl. You'll find out eventually. But not tonight." Eddie promised.
"Eventually?" your heart perked up with hope.
"You think this is going to be a one-and-done? You're sadly mistaken, Pip." He shifted his weight and started back up, loving your body. Worshiping it with a thousand kisses. Lower, lower, lower until he reached the hem of your plain black panties.
“Has anyone ever touched you here?” His hand cupped your panty-covered cunt.
“No.” you shiver.
“I’m honoured to be your first” He slowly started to guide and move his hand over your clothed pussy, massaging it. Exploring what makes your body jerk and tick. You let out a gasp as his soft touch grazed over your already swollen clit.
"That's my girl." he cooed as his hand travelled up and under the hemline of your underwear.
His hand slid down your soft, manicured mound before finding your slit. He let one singular finger travel down your clit to collect the wetness that had pooled and dragged it back up to play with you some more.
"Oh my god," You yelped as the unfamiliar but wonderful feeling of Eddie's hands explored your body.
"You're so wet, sweetheart. This all for me?" He raised his hand to examine the clear, wet, slippery substance that coated his fingers. He then stuck his fingers in his mouth before his eyes rolled back into his head. He moaned at the taste of you.
You were curious if you should be turned on or grossed out by Eddie's behaviour. "You taste like heaven." He praised you, and your body ultimately decided for you. You were turned on.
"Please touch me," You barely whisper. You bravely started to take off your panties when Eddie's hands stopped you.
"That's my favourite part." His hands replaced yours, and he watched intently as he stripped you down into nothing.
You were now fully naked in front of Eddie. You were a bit nervous, but not overly concerned. You trusted Eddie because you've gotten to know each other better over the past six months.
"My god, you're beautiful," He praised once again. You don't think you will ever get tired of him saying that. Your heart soared each time without fail.
"So are you," You whispered back and swore you saw Eddie blush.
Eddie's hands found your needy pussy once more. He wiggled his way down the bed, and he played with your clit until his face was level with your cunt. You felt so exposed you wanted to close your legs right away. But you also wanted to know what it felt like to have Eddie's mouth on your most intimate area.
"Show me how you play with yourself."
This shocked you, and your body froze. How could he ask you to do such a crass thing? Eddie sure was pushing a lot of your boundaries tonight.
"Come on, sweetheart. It's okay, perfectly natural."
You didn't want to disappoint him, so with a trembling hand, you started to circle your clit like always. The feeling started as a mild ache in your lower stomach, but it began to rise as you continued. Your worries and apprehensions slowly drifted away as the feeling of pleasure wafted through your body.
"You never push your fingers inside?" Eddie was mesmerized by the sight in front of him.
You shake your head no. "Doesn't feel right." You were too afraid to finger yourself in the past, not wanting to push the limits; you knew how to please yourself from clit stimulation alone.
"I'm about to change that." Eddie replaced your hand with his mouth, and you cried out in pleasure. This new feeling of something hot and wet consuming your pussy made your eyes involuntarily roll back into your head.
"Yes, good girl, let me hear you." He latched his mouth back onto your clit. His tongue circled and flicked your swollen bud until you were on the edge. You were so close, then his finger slowly entered you, and that took on a whole new feeling. His fingers were longer and wider than your own. He stretched and reached further than you have ever experienced.
"Holy shit!" You cried as his fingers pushed deep inside you. Eddie was careful to go slowly. His middle finger pumped in and out of you before he added another. As his finger worked inside of you, you felt a wave of pleasure from a spot you hadn't ever felt before. It made you cry out embarrassingly loud.
"Ohhhh, good job babygirl." He chuckled smugly. Eddie knew that he had found your one spot that would make you see stars. So, he continuously grazed over it again and again.
You didn't know what was happening to you; your body was undulating under Eddie's touch. He struggled to keep your hips pinned down as he continued to devour your pussy. You couldn't think; you couldn't form words. Your brain had gone into a cloudy haze that focused only on your body and how Eddie was making you feel.
No wonder everyone raved about sex.
"Eddie, Eddie, Eddie" You didn't even know you were talking.
“That’s it, baby, say my name.”
"Eddie!" Your body clenched, and every muscle in your contract as your orgasm ripped through you. Waves of pleasure pulsed as Eddie's mouth and fingers continued to massage your pussy.
"Mmmm, that's my girl. You did so good for me." Eddie praised, and your stomach did another flip-flop at his words.
"You think you want to keep going? Or do you want to stop? You don't need to worry about me. This is all about you, Pip. Okay?"
"I want to keep going." Your voice sounded breathy, like it wasn't coming from you.
"You're sure?"
"Yes, Eddie, I want you to fuck me. Please," you squirmed.
"God, I love hearing those words from your mouth." Eddie bent down to kiss you once again.
.As he kissed you, his mouth had a tangy and slightly salty taste. He explored your mouth with his tongue, just as he had moments before with your lower lips.
"I'm going to go get a condom, okay?" He whispered again to you.
"Okay," you bit your lip with anticipation.
You watched as Eddie shuffled on his knees off the bed to his nightstand and grabbed a blue cardboard box out of his stuffed drawer. He pulled out the foil packet and pulled down his pants and boxers. Your eyes bludged at the sight of Eddie's cock. Sure, you knew what a penis looked like. However, this was your first time seeing one in real life.
"No need to be scared, Pip." Eddie gave a reassuring smile.
"Okay, Eddie," You whispered.
"You can touch me if you want?" He walked over to the bed, cock at full mast. You slowly nod your head and reach out to feel it. Obviously, it felt hard, but you were surprised by the soft skin that felt like velvet.
Eddie made a whimpering sound as your delicate fingers grazed the red tip. You jerked back your hand, afraid you'd hurt him.
"No, no, Pip," Eddie stutterd. "You're okay; it just felt really good s'all."
"Oh," you blushed. Amazed at yourself that you made him feel really good.
"Shit, okay, I'm going to put the condom on now, okay?"
"Okay," you repeated like a parrot.
"Can you lay back for me?" Eddie crawled back up on the bed and over you once more.
You popped back down, and Eddie giggled at your eagerness. He wanted to make this perfect for you, but in your mind he already had. He wanted it to be the least painful he could make it. Hopefully, your orgasm will have helped with that.
"This may hurt a little, but I'm going to go slow, and if you need me to stop or pull out, you tell me, okay?" Eddie's face had never been so serious.
You nod your head.
"No, Pip. I need your words. I need you to tell me you understand. It's important."
Oh.
"I'll let you know if I need to stop. I promise."
"Good girl."
You sucked in a breath and bit your lip at his words. Eddie took a mental note about your reaction. He would tuck it away and save it for later.
"You're already wet enough, I think. I'm going to try and put it in now okay?" Eddie kissed you tenderly and you replied.
The feeling was odd. You felt like you were being split open as your walls burned from being stretched the furthest they have ever been.
"Oh god," Your face scratched as Eddie went in deeper.
"You okay? I can stop"
"No, I can do this. Just stay there a minute." Your body needed time to adjust.
"It's okay," Eddie cooed. He peppered your cheeks with small kisses as he waited for further instructions.
"Okay, I think I'm okay." Your vagina was still tight, but it wasn't as bad as a few minutes ago.
Eddie made sure to be as gentle as possible. Even though it was killing him to not just ram into you repeatedly. Your soft, warm walls were squeezing him so good, too good.
Eventually, after what felt like an hour, Eddie finally reached the hilt. You never felt so full. The feeling was strange yet exciting.
"I'm going to move now, okay?"
He was so patient and kind; you never imagined your first time to be so guided and full of communication. You thought it would just be like boom, stick it in and start. But, no. Not with Eddie.
As Eddie started to rock his hips, the burning started to ease into pleasure. Your hips started moving and rocking with Eddie's body, and you worked together to feel pleasure. Your instincts took over as your thoughts started to numb.
"That's it, baby, fuck, you're making me feel so good." Eddie praised.
"Mmmmm," Was all you managed to get out.
Eddie took that as a sign he could go faster. Thank god he did because the moans that came from you were sinful.
"Yes, baby, be as loud as you want," Eddie commanded before latching his mouth back on the sweet spot he found earlier.
A high-pitched ""Uhhhhhnhhhh" left your mouth as you became more and more cockdrunk by the second. His thick long cock was grazing your walls, finding your g spot that he had reached earlier in the night. Making you yell out his name.
"That's it, baby girl; tell me, who owns this pussy?" Eddie gritted through his teeth, and his pulsing cock pounded into you.
"W-what?"
"Sorry, shit, sorry I got carried away." Eddie kept his rhythm as he forgot that this was your first sexual experience. He couldn't wait to teach you about all his little desires. "you're doing so good for me."
"o-okay"
Your nails lightly scratch up Eddie's back, making him shiver. You then run back down and grab onto his ass. You hugged him like a koala bear, refusing to have this feeling he was giving you to go away. You were so blissed out by it all.
"God baby, I don't think I can hold out much longer," Eddie puffed. His hips never break the rhythm he set.
"Please," you didn't know what you were begging for? You just need him.
"I got you, baby girl; you're being so good for me" Eddie felt your pussy clench down at his words of praise.
"Come on, baby; I know you can give me one more," His hand slipped between you two and found your clit once again. You were so overstimulated that with just a few mild touches, you were falling apart, beneath Eddie.
"Oh fuck, you're squeezing me so good" Eddie tried to hold off, to keep going, to keep fucking you, but he couldn't. Your pussy was so tight around his cock he emptied himself into the condom that was buried inside of you.
Your head felt like it was spinning; your body was limp and racing with those feel-good hormones.
"I'll be right back." He kissed your cheek before getting up off of you after he caught his breath, got rid of the condom and cleaned himself up before returning with a wet cloth for you. But when he returned to the bedroom, you were fast asleep.
He laid the damp cloth on the back of his desk chair and brought the covers back up over the both of you before pulling you into his chest to cuddle you until he fell asleep.
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The next morning the snow had finally stopped, and the bright sunlight had peaked its way through the slits of the cheap blinds that hung in the window.
Eddie heard footsteps outside the bedroom door in his hazy, half-asleep state. He peeked in an eye to see you sprawled out comfortably in his bed. He lifted covers to see your still naked body that he didn't really get to see last night due to the pitch black. He could see the marks he had made more clearly as they had gotten darker within the night.
He couldn't help himself. Here you were naked, sleeping with him in his bed; he just had to touch you. He kissed up the side of your exposed neck, marking the other side that had been left untouched. You moaned and squirmed, then giggled when Eddie's hair tickled you.
The reality of where you were hit the second you awoke.
"Oh, Eddie," You softly moaned.
"Good morning, baby," Eddie rolled on top of you, his morning wood more hormonal than ever.
" 'Morning," you smiled, tucking a piece of hair behind his ear before Eddie nuzzled his head behind the small of your neck.
"So I was hopin' that you'd want to go out with me, officially... or whatever?" He cleared his throat. His morning voice was so sexy.
"Or whatever?" you smiled back up at him.
"Or wha-"
"Hey, Ed's, I'm finally back-Holy hell!-" Suddenly, Uncle Wayne was walking into the bedroom, and you were screaming, trying to cover yourself, and Eddie was trying to cover as much of you as he could.
Wayne was mortified as he shut the door behind him as quickly as possible.
"Put a sock on the door next time you have company, Kid!" Wayne shouted, flustered as ever.
Eddie barked out a laugh, and you couldn't be more embarrassed.
"Oh my god, I can't go out there? Do you think I can fit through the window?" You asked Eddie before covering your face with your hands.
"Come on, Pip. I'm sure he didn't see anything; probably only saw my pasty ass." He got up and pulled you along with him.
He found your folded clothes on the chair where you had left them, but when you went to put on your underwear, they were nowhere to be found.
You got dressed without them, and Eddie pulled you out of his room hand in hand to Face Wayne.
"So I guess it was your car all covered in snow." Wayne shifted uncomfortably in his chair as he sat at the kitchen table with a cup of black coffee. "There uh- coffee for the both of ya's if you want." He offered.
"Thanks." You tugged at your sleeve, not knowing what to do. Should you leave? Should you stay? Can you leave? The show was up to your knees.
"Better make yourself comfortable; the plows will take a while to get to this side of town." Wayne made the decision for you. Eddie guided you to the kitchen table and pulled out a seat for you.
"Wayne, you remember Pippin, don't you?" Eddie smiled brightly as he got you two mugs.
"Of course I do." He smiled genuinely this time. The awkwardness was lifting.
Eddie didn't need to ask how you took your coffee. He remembered two creams and two sugar. He once said it was too sweet, just like you.
"Thanks," you smile up at him as he places your coffee before you.
"I was wondering when the two of you would finally get together... Ever since high school, I've been bugging this one," He motions to Eddie, " To get his head out of his ass and to lock you down already."
"Took him long enough, you giggle"
"Now I know you two are adults, but I don't need no little munson babies running around here just yet, so you better be safe-"
"Okay, okay, Old man, we get it. We have already had this uncomfortable talk once when I was fifteen. I don't need it again."
"Fifteen?!" your eyes blog you're off your head.
"What can I say? The ladies love them some, Eddie." he smiled cockily.
You lightly pinch Eddie's arm, so he shuts up.
"Hey!" Eddie rubbed his bicep.
I knew I always liked you." Wayne tipped up his mug to you with a smile. "keep him in line."
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ja3hwa · 8 months ago
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♡ 𝐏𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐞 𝐓𝐡𝐢𝐞𝐟 | 𝐉.𝐖𝐘 ♡
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【Synopsis】 : You started to think you were losing your mind. Where on earth is your underwear disappearing to? Your roommate wouldn't happen to know, right?
『Word count』 : 750
-> Genre: Smut. Roommate au.
Pairing: Bestfriend!Wooyoung x AFab!Reader
[Warnings] : Masturbation. Pantie fucking. Swearing. Pet names. Kisses. Light banter. Flirting.
Note: I'M BACCKKKKKKK!!! DID YALL MISS ME HEHE.
My darling @shinestarhwaa , the minute i saw your request, i was up all night thinking about it. I would have made this longer, but Idk why i didn't, honestly, haha. I hope you like it hehe.
Based on this request ♡
Masterlist | Navigation | Buy me a Ko-Fi ♡
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This was the fifth pair in weeks that had gone missing. At first, you thought you might have been forgetting them at the laundromat in the basement of your apartment. But when you couldn’t find them there you started to believe only one thing. Standing in your silky robe with your hands on your hips, you head down the hall from the bathroom, going past your room towards your roommate. If anyone knew what might have happened it’ll be him. 
But little did you know, Wooyoung, your precious roommate was the one stealing them. It didn’t start like this at first. One time he did his laundry with your stuff and one of your pretty pink pairs of lacy panties got mixed up with his stuff. Tucked perfectly in his jeans. Out of sight. When he was putting his clothes away, he couldn’t help it, you were napping and he didn’t want to sneak into your room, fearing he’d wake you. 
So he did the natural thing. He was going to leave them on his counter and wait until you woke up. He was going to leave them on his counter…. He was going to wait. Wait for you to wake… How on earth can your panties be so soft? Are they silk? So warm, and they smell like your floral detergent. God, they're perfect. “Fuck…”
He was ashamed at first, rushing to pull his sweats down, awkwardly wrapping the garment around his aching cock. He had never came so hard in his life before feeling the sweet material around himself. It was messy, filthy. Sinful. He couldn’t help himself, as the days turned into weeks and one pair turned into five. He hid them under his bed, of course, not knowing what to do with the cum filled cloth. He couldn’t just put them in a wash, cause you do the washing nine out of ten. And he couldn’t possibly say all of these panties just happened to end up in his load. He was in too deep. So hiding them became the best option.
Then a knock at the door alerted him. He was right in the middle of pleasuring himself with your panties when you walked in and man the look on your face turned him pale. Pure shock was best to describe your features. Standing there in a bathrobe of all things, looking at him with utter disbelief. Wooyoung wanted nothing more than to hide away, and never return. Tucking his cock away in his sweats, his hand was tightly clutching the -your- panties. “I… I. uh. I can explain.”
“I was wondering where my panties went. What the fuck Youngie!?” You folded your arms across your chest, tapping your bare foot on the ground. “Do you have the rest of them??”
Wooyoung’s brain had successfully stopped working, just staring at you like a deer in headlights. In his mind, your friendship was over, but in yours, he needed to be punished. Sure it was weird but not the worst thing you’ve seen. And it probably doesn’t make it as bad since you have a huge crush on him. So right now, you wanted to play a game. Since he made you lose your mind, you wanted him to have just a taste. “Well? Why did you do it? I’ve been searching myself stupid for them.”
“Look, doll, I’m so sorry. It just happened and I couldn’t stop. I uh… god I’m a creep.” He was still seated in the middle of his bed, banging his head lightly on his headboard. You were silent for a moment, letting him sit in some guilt before you couldn’t hold back the smile. Starting to laugh. This caught Wooyoung’s attention so fast, letting him snap his neck in your direction.
“Oh lighten up Youngie.” You waltz over to him, leaning down so your face is inches away from his blushed one. “Just tell me so I don’t lose my mind over where they went.” he kissed his cheek before turning away and heading for the door.
Wooyoung didn’t move though, no, he sat with bulbous eyes watching you with a stopped heart. You gave him one more smile before saying. “Oh and next time you want to fuck your cock with something of mine. maybe try my pussy.”
And with that you left with a beaming smile, closing the door to leave Wooyoung with his short-circuited mind and aching hard cock.
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lucysarah-c · 6 months ago
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Not sure if this is like, allowed to be answered and feel free not to of course. But reaction to Levi finding out someone tried to assault his s/o, or just hurting them in general like a more targeted instance rather than a battle, even before they are partners and could just be friends, you think more of a quick death or Levi would get sorta sadistic?
Have a great one 🐞 and thanks for always feeding us amazing works
Hi dear! Ah, no one has called me "bug" in years!!! Haha, thank you—that was so sweet of you!
Don’t thank me! Thank you for reading and stopping by my blog.
I really like this ask… Maybe because I’ve had a similar scenario in mind for my fic, but I just can't seem to find the right approach to it. I’ll try my best here! I’m 100% a "violence doesn’t solve anything" kind of person, and even when someone is truly horrible, I can't stand seeing them get hurt, especially physically. I’m that "sensitive" type, sorry haha. I feel Levi would say something similar to what my mother always tells me: "Don’t try to be more Catholic than the Pope" (a saying we have in Argentina, meaning "Don’t be too nice because people will take advantage of you. Be a little bit tough when necessary").
So, I’ll be completely honest with you: No, this ask doesn’t make me uncomfortable. But I do believe that Levi would resort to violence in certain situations. Levi killed a couple of guys just because they messed with Isabel’s hair. If his special someone (be it a friend, girlfriend, etc.) got hurt or was assaulted, Levi wouldn’t wait to see if she filed a report or went to the police.
He would simply stare at her and demand, "Who was it? Do you know them? Can you identify them?"
If it happened recently and she still shows signs of the struggle, she might try to downplay it. "It’s over now… It doesn’t hurt that much—"
"I didn’t ask if it hurt or if it was over. I asked who did it," he’d reply firmly.
She might avoid giving straight answers, trying to brush it off, perhaps out of shock, embarrassment, or fear—fear for Levi and the trouble he might get into. "I already filed a report and—"
"Have you ever seen any of those bastards behind bars because of a report?" Levi would counter. "Who was it? Give me a name."
"I pressed charges—"
"I’m sorry to break it to you, but men aren’t scared of charges. They know they can get away with it. They know they have friends who will bail them out, who will erase the charges, who will stand up for them," Levi explained. "Do you know what the only thing those assholes fear is? Being treated and beaten down the way they treat others. Beasts like them only understand their own language."
If the person responsible is someone Levi can’t directly deal with, like a higher-ranking officer or an MP, he’d still find a way to make them pay. He’d beat them up so thoroughly and probably in public to humiliate them. Levi knows the military can't afford to lose him, so while he might not be able to kill them, he’d ensure they couldn't sit straight for a long time. The most sadistic I can imagine him being is if he beats them so badly that they end up begging for mercy. And then Levi, lifting them by their hair, would say, "Don’t beg me—beg her."
Now, if the perpetrator is a regular citizen… they’re dead without a second chance. I can’t see Levi being sadistic in the sense of torturing someone, but he wouldn’t give them a quick death either.
So, that’s it. I hope I managed to write this well enough!
Thank you so much!
Have a lovely day.
Link to my masterlist and my other works if you feel like checking them out. Tags!: @nube55 @justkon @notgoodforlife @nmlkys @humanitys-strongest-bamf @quillinhand @thoreeo @darkstarlight82 @angelofthorr @aomi04 @levisbrat25 @l3visthighs @hum4n-wr3ckag3 @hannieslovebot @starrylevi @rithty @mariaace @ackrmntea @emilyyyy-08 @levisfavoriteteashop @katestrophes @levistealeaf @an-ever-angry-bi @youre-ackermine @fxnnyackerman @secretmoneybearvoid @trashblackrainbow @flxrartsstuff @katharinasdiaryy @levisecretgfblog @searriously @blackdxggr @ackermanswifee @galactict3a @abiatackerman @braunsbabe @moonchild-12345 Wanna join my tag list? Here!
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lowkeychenle · 1 year ago
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Like We Just Met [ZCL] (M)
Description: Everything else about the day is completely normal when Chenle realizes he wants to marry you. It hits him like a tidal wave, and he's itching to tell you just how much he wants to love you forever.
Genre: Fluff (literally SO MUCH FLUFF we love Chenle in this house go away if you don't) // Smut
Content Warnings: Explicit unprotected sex (it's actually sweet this time am I feeling okay), talks about marriage etc etc. Nothing really dark or upsetting in here.
Word Count: 11,292 (y'all I have no idea how this happened...)
Pairing: Zhong Chenle x Reader (feat. the rest of the Dreamies)
ISTJ 7Dream Series Masterlist
Juliet's Masterlist | Requests/Tell me what you think of this plz <3
Tag List (open for ISTJ 7Dream Series): @kunvibing
Author's Note: Lowkey? This was so fun because it's from Chenle's POV...or it's supposed to be haha. This is probably my favorite fic I've ever written catch me crying in the corner...also this gif don't mind the real tears in my eyes
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Nobody questioned Renjun when he said he’d invited his friend to dance practice. They brought friends in every now and then, so it wasn’t anything new. Chenle was having a bit of an off day. He kept screwing up the choreography (that he’d done seven hundred times probably in the past week alone) and even accidentally elbowed Jaemin.
Renjun’s friend had yet to show up. Chenle was beyond frustrated with the way things were going, so he let everyone know he was taking a break. He grabbed his water bottle and stomped out of the practice room.
He ended up a bit down the hallway, resting his back on the wall with his eyes closed. All he needed was a break. That had to be it.
“Are you okay?” a soft voice asked.
When he looked at you, he recoiled a bit. He’d never seen you before—he’d definitely remember—but something about you felt familiar. Like a warm aura surrounded you and infiltrated him in the best ways.
“You’re Chenle, right?” You tilted your head at him. “I’m Renjun’s friend, (Y/N). I was supposed to watch practice, but I got lost. This building is pretty big.”
“Yeah, I’m Chenle.” He blinks at you a couple more times. “Um, we’re always in the same practice room. I’ll take you over there.”
“Actually, is there a place to get some water? I forgot mine at home.” You scratched the top of your head and scrunched up your nose. “It was really hot outside.”
“It’s on the way.” He gestured down the hall with his head.
You followed him without hesitation. He was acutely aware of every step you took, of how there was only a few feet between the two of you. Even though he had no clue what to say to you, you didn’t mind walking along in silence. It was unlike him to be shy. Next to impossible for him to be starstruck.
“How long have you known Renjun for?” he asked. And why the hell had you not come around sooner?
“Oh.” You took a deep breath and pursed your lips in thought as Chenle stopped to grab you a water bottle from the kitchen. “Four years now? Five? His family knows mine, so when I came back here, his parents told him he had to help me find my way around.”
“Well, today’s pretty laid back,” Chenle explains. “We’ll probably practice for another hour or two and then go home. We’ve been at it all day.”
You hum in response, opening the cap and taking a sip. “Thank you for this. Sorry to keep you from practice.”
“Don’t be. I’m ready to get the hell out of here.” Chenle chuckles, gaze drinking you in when you’re distracted by your water. “And…they can be a little…much at first. But they’re all great people, so you’ll be fine.”
“Bold of you to assume I’m nervous.” You narrowed your eyes at him playfully.
He bit back a smile, pressing his lips into a thin line instead. “Don’t say I didn’t warn you.”
“Renjun has given me plenty of warnings,” you tell him.
He wasn’t sure why he hadn’t taken you to the practice room yet. The two of you stood in the kitchen, but he knew the second you were with everyone else, the conversation was over. He didn’t want to stop talking to you, and that odd feeling of warmth settled into his chest.
“Like what?” Chenle raised his eyebrows.
“He said you’re cranky and mean.” You smiled at him, and he swore he was almost knocked off his feet. There was something about you that drew him in.
Chenle made a mental note to scold Renjun later, but he’s not necessarily wrong…he was cranky until he saw you.
“Well, in that case, what he said about everyone else is probably accurate, too.”
“You don’t look cranky,” you interjected. “You’re not mean either. Mean people don’t get strangers water bottles.”
“I’m mean to Renjun. And Jisung.”
“They’re your friends. You get a pass for your friends.” You slid one of your hands into the back pocket of your jeans, rocking on the balls of your feet as silence befell the room.
“They’re waiting for me,” Chenle says. “We should go.”
You nodded in agreement and followed him. He sulked a bit when the other members were introduced to you. They were all nice—because they always were—but when it came time to get back to practice, he found himself gravitating toward you several times.
Nearly every time he looked at you, you were already looking at him, too. Maybe it wasn’t just him that felt the weird tug. He hoped it wasn’t.
After they wrapped everything up, Chenle sat against the back wall, feeling so heavy as if he could fall asleep right there. He was exhausted.
Jaemin, Jeno, Donghyuck, and Mark were already on their way out the door, leaving Jisung to slump next to Chenle and Renjun to talk with you. Jisung noted how he was watching you, but he didn’t say anything right away. He drank his water and stayed quiet.
You said something to Renjun, who smiled at you and nodded. He headed for the door and waited for you outside. When Chenle realized you were coming over to him, he shot a worried glance over at Jisung.
“Would you look at that?” Jisung cleared his throat. “Time for me to go.”
Before Chenle could even grab him, Jisung was halfway to the door. Once you were in front of him, you sat down and crossed your legs.
“You did really well today.”
He chuckled. “I think that’s the worst I’ve done this comeback season.”
“Then you’re in pretty good shape.” You shrugged, picking at the seam of your jeans. “I wanted to thank you. For helping me earlier.”
“It wasn’t that big of a deal,” he said. “You’re Renjun’s friend. Of course, I’d help you.”
“Right.” You brushed your hair over your shoulder and prepared to stand up. “I should go—”
“Will you be coming back?” The question shot out of his mouth, sending a blush to his cheeks in response.
“I’m not sure,” you told him. “That’s up to Renjun I guess. It was really cool to see how passionate you guys are.”
“Let me give you my number.” Chenle grabbed his phone from his pocket. “Um, just in case you get lost again. And need help finding the room.” He cringed at himself, hoping he wasn’t going to get rejected.
“Yeah, I’d like that.” You gave him the tiniest smile, but it made his heart flutter anyway.
He handed it to you with the contact app open. You didn’t even hesitate to type in your name and number. After, you sent yourself a text, and Chenle heard it ring in your back pocket. You gave it back to him, grinned, and left him sitting there in shock.
He couldn’t choose between staring at you as you left and looking down at your contact open on his screen. His stomach twisted with nerves, but the second he saw the smiley face emoji you’d put next to your name, he already knew.
You were going to be someone to him.
Mark drops something in the kitchen, snapping Chenle out of it. He looks at you, and you smile back at him. With you pressed into his side and your legs over his lap, he can’t help but grin right back.
His hand rests on your thigh, thumb sliding gently back and forth as he presses a kiss to your temple. He’d never get used to this.
After returning from the kitchen, Mark allows the game to resume. His nose scrunches as he glances between you and Chenle. “That’s a weird ass question.”
“Not weird.” Chenle shakes his head. “Critical thinking, Mark, you should try it.”
“Oh, be nice.” You shove his shoulder.
For a while now, Chenle has felt his feelings growing more than he thought possible. He’s already in love with you (thankfully, since you’ve been together almost a year now), but something about you lately has him on a whole other level. Even then, he’s not sure what it is. He decides he’ll ride it out for a while and see where it takes him.
“Why would you ask your girlfriend what year she’d take a time machine back to? Shouldn’t she be like…happiest now?” Mark asks, sipping on whatever mixed drink he’d prepared in Chenle’s kitchen.
“You’d think.” Chenle snorts, leaning back against the couch and throwing his arm around you.
“He asks me questions like this all the time,” you tell Mark. When you steal a glance at your boyfriend, his breath catches in his chest.
What the hell is going on with him lately? He can’t concentrate around you (even more than usual) and every tiny thing you do has his heart hammering against his ribcage. Soon enough, he’s sure you’ll both hear the bones crack.
“Has anyone, by chance, ever told you two that you’re gross?” Mark chuckles to himself and leans back in the recliner. “Some of us are single and lonely, you know.”
“Some of us will never be that again,” Chenle shoots back.
“Oh, you two are the worst.” Your laugh echoes pleasantly in his ears, and he subconsciously leans closer to you.
“I am curious what your answer is, though,” Mark interjects. “Since Chenle’s so sure.”
Chenle takes a sip of his own drink, nearly cringing at the bitter taste dragging down his throat. He’s not much of a drinker—social at best. But he can still appreciate the buzz and the hazy happiness that comes with it. You take his hand that dangles over your shoulder, twirling the friendship ring wrapped around his middle finger. The action is so, so simple, yet it makes his stomach turn.
If he doesn’t figure out what the hell’s going on with him soon, he’s gonna have to separate himself from you.
“Well, you’re right.” You shrug, shuffling closer to Chenle. “This part of my life has definitely been the best. But if I could go back to any time, it would probably be when we met. You only get to meet Zhong Chenle once in your life, dude. I’d do it over and over again if I could. The second I saw him, I knew he would be important to me.”
Chenle thinks back to the moment he first saw you. The way he couldn’t keep his eyes off of you like an actual child or the way he took in every detail of you to store in his mind forever—just in case he never got to speak to you again. He pauses, eyebrows furrowing slightly as he analyzes your answer.
Mark groans. “That doesn’t count! That was last year.”
Grabbing the pillow next to him, Chenle throws it at his friend. “Leave her alone, it was a good answer.”
But when he contemplates that thought, he’s not sure he understands what you mean. His ears burn, the tips of them turning red as he recalls how embarrassingly nervous he was around you all the time. How awkward all of your firsts together were. Everything now is so much better than back then.
Not to mention he’s looked at you the same way since that first night. His feelings for you have grown, sure, but those butterflies he used to get still torment him just about every time he sees you smile.
“Why?” Chenle finally asks.
“You were so cute,” you hum, shifting closer to him. “Everything made you nervous. You almost keeled over in embarrassment when you asked to hold my hand.”
Mark laughs, and Chenle sends a glare his way. No part of that is even anywhere near funny.
“Okay, it's your turn.” Mark gestures at you.
Chenle resists the urge to reach over and touch your face. Usually, he’s so much better about being so clingy in front of his friends and, while he would prefer Mark not seeing this side of him, he couldn’t care less when his gaze is locked with yours.
“Cool.” You nod, taking a sip of your drink. “Both of you. Hypothetical situation. Let’s say you’re drunk. You walk into a room and everyone you’ve ever loved is in there. Like…loved. Who are you going to?”
“Dude.” Mark’s jaw drops. “That’s such a shitty question for me.”
“You’ll live,” Chenle replies. “Just romantic love?”
“All of it. Platonic, romantic, family.” You purse your lips in thought.
Chenle doesn’t have to think about it. Not really. He’d rather get struck by lightning and then hit by a bus right after before admitting that so easily in front of Mark. In this case, it’s always been you. From the second you spoke to him for the first time, he was irrevocably yours. 
“You.” Chenle watches your eyebrows raise.
“Be serious,” you say. “Your parents are included in that.”
“I’m serious. You.” Chenle chuckles.
You give him a pointed look, but that’s when Mark cuts in.
“No, he’s for real. Like…that legitimately happened.” Mark leans forward, elbows digging into his thighs as he rests his head in his palms. “Do you guys not remember?”
“What are you talking about?” you ask him, frowning.
Chenle remembers. Barely, and it’s a bit foggy, but it comes back like a baseball bat upside the head as Mark starts telling the story.
Chenle’s birthday party last year. The night was barely halfway through and he was drunk enough to be stumbling over his feet. He’d heard you were coming, but he had yet to see you. Even when every other feeling was numbed by the tingling sensation the alcohol left behind, his craving to see you was all that remained. 
Mark walked next to him, having a full conversation with himself since Chenle was so fog-brained. As much as he loved Mark, there was only one person he wanted to see. Everyone he knew and loved was here—his parents, the rest of his group, and Jisung had somehow forgotten to uninvite Chenle’s ex.
He only ever dated one person before you, but he wasn’t sure he ever loved her. Regardless, there she was. Even with her standing across the room from him, he kept waiting like a lost puppy.
When you walked in, he swore the whole world stopped around him. Everyone but you was moving in slow motion before they eventually faded into nothing, darkness that was emphasized by the light you were. His breath caught in his throat, and he stopped walking.
Chenle couldn’t form a coherent thought while he stared at you, drunken stupor making it so much easier to forget the embarrassment. Mark watched him curiously as Chenle made his way over to you. He refused to waste any more time when he knew you were the one he wanted to talk to.
You had always been more confident around him than he was around you. Your face lit up when you saw him, wrapping your arms around him. He secured you in his grasp, breathing in the scent of your hair and the perfume you wore.
“Happy birthday.” Your voice is muffled a bit by his T-shirt. “Sorry I’m late, took a bit longer to get ready than I thought it would.”
He knew he should’ve let you go. People were starting to notice the way he was clinging to you, and not even being drunk could excuse that behavior. He was about ready to tell everyone except you to leave. Nothing else mattered. If he could spend his birthday with you, it would be the best one yet.
It’d been two months since Renjun had introduced you to the rest of them. Which means, he’s only known of your existence for two months, and you already command so much of his brain matter that he can’t think of anyone but you. Great.
He finally (reluctantly) let you go and led you over to the rest of the group. Nobody said anything when he made Mark scoot over so you could sit next to him. Nobody questioned it. His parents would ask him about it later, but until then, there was no reason for him to worry. After all, his crush on you was the most obvious thing in the world, so it was only a matter of time before you found out about it.
By the end of the night, he hadn’t spent enough time with you. People were starting to shuffle out, but you stayed, chatting with Renjun until only four remained. Chenle’s parents had gone to bed long ago. You were almost caught up to him on drinks, your laughs longer and your movements slower.
Under any other circumstances, he wouldn’t have been as brave as to walk up to you and ask you to stay the night. He didn’t mean it in a suggestive way, either. He just didn’t want you to leave yet.
“Chenle,” Renjun scolds, swatting his shoulder. “You can’t ask something like that so casually.”
“You want me to stay here? With you?” Your voice was higher than normal. Chenle accredited it to the alcohol raging in your system.
“I like when you’re here.” Chenle nodded. “You make everything calm.”
Renjun scrunched up his face, slamming his forehead into his palm. “(Y/N), you should probably go home—”
“No, it’s okay.” You brushed him off. “I’m okay with staying.”
Oh, he was in love with you. There was no other explanation for the way his heart skipped a beat when those words came out of your mouth.
Chenle doesn’t remember the rest of that night, but he does recall waking up next to you in the morning and freaking out. Alcohol made him brave, but it didn’t save him from the red-hot embarrassment of the next day.
“I didn’t even realize…” you trailed off, a small smile forming on your face. “You picked me.”
“I’ll always pick you,” Chenle responds easily, like second nature.
Mark decides it’s time for him to leave, but Chenle’s mind is still reeling with memories. With all of the firsts you said you wished you could relive. But no matter how hard he tries, he can’t figure out what the fuck this feeling is. As the two of you climb into bed, he’s so distracted, he can’t fall asleep, even with you curled into his chest.
“(Y/N),” Chenle groaned when he saw you in the practice room mirror. “You gotta stop showing up here if you don’t want me to fall in love with you.”
It was a joke. Sort of.
“Right, and let you forget to eat? I think not.” You fought back every time, unphased by the way he so casually admitted he’s starting to fall for you.
At least, that was his idea of admitting it.
You walked over with the bags in your hand, sitting down on the practice room floor next to him. 
“I haven’t even been here that long,” Chenle defended himself. “I would’ve eaten after I left.”
You unloaded the contents, opening boxes. “I can go if that’s what you want.”
“Not what I said.” For some reason, he felt a sudden burst of courage. He’s known you for four months at this point, and something about today felt…right. “I was serious, you know.”
“About what?” You grabbed the drinks from the carrier.
“You.”
“What?” You recoiled, looking at him in confusion.
He contemplated telling you to forget it. That it didn’t matter, and thank you for the food instead. If you didn’t feel the same way for him, he’d be devastated. And then you’d leave him for good and take all the food with you. He was starving.
“If you keep doing nice things for me, I’m gonna fall for you.” As if he hasn’t already.
You paused, but Chenle didn’t miss the blush on your face. Clearing your throat, you looked away from him and took a deep breath. His fists clenched as he awaited your rejection, but the longer the silence stretched, the more he felt you might want him to.
“Don’t say things like that if you don’t mean it,” you finally said and brushed your hair behind your ears. Reaching forward for the food again, you gave Chenle a shocked look when he grabbed your wrist.
“You’re right. I’m not going to fall for you. I already did.”
Your jaw dropped, eyes widening as his words settled in the air around both of you. With his heart racing, he released your wrist and intertwined your fingers instead.
“I really, really like you.”
“You should really eat your food before it gets cold.” You pulled your hand from his and pushed the box closer to him.
He stared blankly at the wall, noting the sudden chill on his skin that you left behind. A sinking feeling encapsulated his chest, and he knew he ruined everything. You looked like you were ready to run.
“Forget I said anything,” he told you. “I’m sorry if that was weird.”
“Eat,” you commanded again. “I’m not talking about this with you until I know you’ve eaten. If you don’t, we’ll go off on a tangent and you’ll be starving all night.”
“Does that mean you—”
“Yes, Chenle.” You interrupted him. “Yes, I really, really like you too, which is why I want to make sure you eat.”
At that moment, Chenle realized that if he walked outside and randomly dropped dead, he’d be okay with it now that he’s gotten that confession out of you. There wasn’t a damn thing that could top that. Everything else in life would be subpar to today, so there was no point in trying.
You and Chenle ate in silence. He kept stealing glances at you, catching you doing the same to him. If all he had to do in order to get you to talk about your feelings with him was eat, he’d do it, albeit probably a bit too fast for his own good.
Chenle runs his fingers through his hair, his thumb tracing gentle shapes against the bare skin of your arm. These memories have no business popping up in the middle of the night. He has practice tomorrow. He’ll be so off his game, the other members will want to kill him.
Usually, he has no problem falling asleep, especially with you right beside him. Over the past year, you’ve probably spent more nights with him than you have at your own place. He teases you for it all the time, but he wouldn’t have it any other way.
Closing his eyes, he listens to the soft sounds of your breathing and allows himself to feel the way your body slots with his so easily. Everything about you is perfect. About the two of you together. He would toss and turn, but no way is he going to disturb you. Even if he can’t sleep, he’d never screw up your schedule on purpose.
“It’s so pretty.” You were in awe, staring at the sunset from Chenle’s backyard. He’d set up a picnic date for the two of you, and afterward, you were watching the sun fade below the treeline while lying on top of a red blanket.
His fingers were intertwined with yours, something that had become so normal for you. Two weeks since his confession, and it was the second date he planned. He wondered, obsessed over, even, what your thought process was on all of this. Were you happy? Did he make you happy?
He wanted to kiss you when he confessed to you. And while he came close to it on your first date, he decided against it. It had to be perfect. Nothing was good enough for you in his mind, especially when all he wanted was to make sure you knew just how he felt about you.
How was he supposed to tell you that?
He’d already said he fell for you, but that didn’t begin to cover it. Not really. You made him want to put in effort, made him crave your happiness like it was the very oxygen he breathed. At the same time, he didn’t want you to think he didn’t want to kiss you. Hell, he’d already dreamed of it, for fuck’s sake, so that definitely wasn’t the issue.
Lost in thought, he’s only snapped out of it by the way you rolled over, lying on your stomach so you can get a good look at his face. You rested your head on your right palm, your left finding his bicep.
“You’re so perfect,” he hummed, twirling your hair with his fingers. “Could look at you forever.”
“Some people might have an issue with that.” You laughed.
“We’re the only ones that matter,” he responded.
Your smile slowly faded, a look of longing replacing it as your gaze softened.
God, he wanted to kiss you. He needed to.
All thoughts of the perfect moment have fled from his brain. Any moment would be perfect as long as it’s you.
He sat up and you leaned forward, and before he knew it, his nose brushed yours. Your eyes fluttered shut in preparation. The heat of the sun sank into his skin. Your perfume wafted from you, intertwining with the air and suffocating him in the best ways. If he could pick one scent to smell for the rest of his life, it would be yours.
Was it normal to have these thoughts so early?
Why was he thinking of that right now? Literally the worst possible time.
“Can I?” he whispered, scared to ruin everything.
“Yes.”
As soon as the word left your mouth, he kissed you. Everything about you was soft, so he shouldn’t have been so surprised to find your lips the same way. His hands shook as he touched your waist.
He was already in big trouble. There wasn’t a single part of him that wanted to stop there. His heart thudded so loud, he was halfway sure you could hear it, too. It felt like sparks flew between you two, absolute electricity coursing through every single one of his veins, heating up his bloodstream and making the thought of pulling away from you the absolute worst case scenario.
You moved away first, gasping for breath. Chenle craved tugging you back to him. His body reacted to you in ways it had never reacted to anyone else. He didn’t want to take it too far, but he sure as hell didn’t want to stop, either.
He couldn’t describe the way you felt. The way you tasted. Everything about you was so heart-achingly perfect, he wanted to experience you all the time. He wanted to rewind time so he could kiss you again for the first time, and he’d do it over and over and over again.
Something about first kisses set him on fire. He was absolutely sure he’d kiss you more. In fact, he was seconds away from it. But the adrenaline coming from the very first brush of your lips on his wasn’t something he’d ever be able to recreate.
“Again.” You leaned in once more.
He met you in the middle eagerly, hand finding the back of your head before he turned you so you were lying on your back. Half of his weight pressed against you, but he did his best to keep himself lifted up so you weren’t uncomfortable.
Unforgettable heat swarmed him, the sun caressing his skin as your fingers gently traced down the back of his neck. Goosebumps formed, but he could hardly pay attention to them. The entire world was gone, and you were everything, the only person remaining in a sea of nothingness. He wanted you. Needed you.
This was technically your second kiss, but in his mind, it was still the first since they happened almost at the same time. He hadn’t stopped to take a breath in much too long, but he’d rather suffocate than separate from you.
He stopped when your breath hitched, completely lost in the sound. When he wasn’t focusing on your mouth anymore, he realized why—his hand had somehow found its way to your upper thigh. His face burned as he removed it.
“I didn’t…” he trailed off, scanning over your face for any hint of what you were feeling. “I didn’t mean to do that.”
You chuckled at him, pushing his shoulder. “You wish that excuse would work on me.”
The sky faded into a beautiful lilac color, the kind that only appeared when the sun was barely peeking over the horizon. Clouds drifted effortlessly, stars beginning to shine.
“Should we go inside?” Chenle asked. “It’ll get cold without the sun.”
Whenever he looked at you, he knew you were different. He couldn’t place how, but nobody else had ever made him feel the way you do. Like his heart was going to burst out of his chest while simultaneously stopping and also skipping every other beat. He didn’t even know how he was alive anymore.
In the last two weeks since his confession, the boys had told him how much happier he was. How he was striving with more effort lately and trying his best at any given moment of the day. You were his motivation. You made him want to be the absolute best he could be, and even as new as the relationship was, he’d already known you for months—he was nervous about you deciding you wanted something else. Someone who wasn’t him.
The moment before replayed in his head, and he heard that breath hitch on repeat while he awaited your answer. He did his best to stop thinking about it, but nothing worked. All he wanted to do was kiss you again, over and over and over until the literal end of time.
“Yeah.” You nodded. “Let’s go inside.”
His cheeks redden just thinking of that memory. The first time he ever kissed you, and he royally fucked up because his hand didn’t know how to stay put. At this point, it’s clear he’s not going to be able to fall asleep. He hates the idea of leaving you in bed alone, but he’s only going to disturb you if he doesn’t plan on sleeping.
Sliding away from you carefully, he quietly gets up and heads into the kitchen. He runs his fingers through his hair. His hands down his face. He must be sentimental today, because he can’t stop thinking about you for the life of him. Every memory from the last year pokes at his head, and he has no clue how to handle it.
Patting his cheeks, he heads over to the fridge to grab a water bottle. Photos of the two of you are framed up on the wall. There’s one picture in particular he always says is his favorite, but he refuses to tell you why.
The two of you were sitting on the floor, and you had the cutest glare on your face. He sees the adoration gleaming in your gaze even though you look about ready to strangle him. In your defense, you probably were. He lets out a tiny laugh, tracing over the frame. 
There’s even one with Chenle between you and Jisung, and a group picture with you and the boys. Chenle loves his friends dearly, and the way they’ve welcomed you with open arms says a lot about both your relationship with them and his potential future with you. Everyone in his life loves you. You’re the one they call when Chenle’s upset or if he’s off his game, and no matter when or where this is happening, you show up to make him feel better.
He could be having the worst day of his entire existence, and a simple ‘I love you’ passing from your lips has him forgetting everything shitty about the world. Looking back at the pictures, he’s drawn back into memory.
He heard the birds outside his window before he saw the gleaming sun. His eyes fluttered open while he groaned quietly at the sudden change of brightness. Your body was like a fireball, your skin searing hot against his, but it did little to bother him. His groan turned into a sigh of content, and he wrapped his arms around you tighter. Fingertips trailing down your bare spine, he kissed your forehead.
Three months together, and every night spent with you made him fall deeper in love. He’d never known peace as he did at that moment. No interruptions, just the two of you basking in each other’s embrace.
He could’ve stayed like that forever—he wanted to, but glancing at the clock, he realized how close it was to noon. Jaemin would be there soon, and the last thing Chenle needed was him in his house when you were naked in his bed.
He reluctantly got up, dressing himself before grabbing some clothes for you. You have a drawer, multiple, actually, but he picked his own T-shirt for you to wear. When he made it over to you, you were stirring.
“You got up.” You pouted at him, staring at him through half-closed eyes. “And you have clothes on.”
Chenle laughed. “Sorry, love. Jaemin will be here soon.”
“It’s that late?” you asked.
Chenle nodded, setting the clothes down next to you. He kissed you softly, gently, a kiss so barely there it left you leaning forward to try to continue it. Cupping your cheek, he brushed his thumb along your skin.
You didn’t need help getting dressed, but he did it anyway. He loved the way you looked in his T-shirts, and even though it’s long enough to cover you, no way he’d risk it. Once you were finished, the two of you got ready for the day. You brushed your teeth together, he watched you brush your hair, and by the time you’re done, Jaemin was walking in the front door.
The three of you sat on the floor around Chenle’s coffee table, playing a game. He can’t remember what the game was anymore, only that you were terrible at it and that he loved winning.
Jaemin teased both of you the whole time, ruffling Chenle’s hair on multiple occasions. As much as he’d love to deny it, Chenle enjoyed that Jaemin liked the two of you together. It was almost like an affirmation, even if he didn’t need one.
Being the professional picture-snapper he was, Jaemin took the picture now hanging up on Chenle’s wall. You, with your arms crossed over your chest and a big pout on your face, and Chenle, smiling widely at you with such adoration in his eyes it should’ve been impossible.
“Lele?” Your soft voice breaks him away from his memory. He turns to you quickly, heart instantly halting in his chest when he sees his shirt on you.
“What are you doing up?” he asks.
“I was gonna ask you that.” You rub your eyes, feet shuffling on the floor as you walk over to him.
“I couldn’t sleep,” he replies and takes you in his arms with ease. “Didn’t want to bug you, sunshine.”
You don’t respond. All you do is bury your head in his chest and breathe him in. He runs his fingers through your hair, kissing the top of your head. With all the lights off, the only illumination is the full moon outside as it casts shadows on the ground. The faint blue makes you that much more ethereal to him.
“You okay?” he whispers.
“Mm,” you hum in response. “This is nice.”
Chenle smiles. “Yeah, it is. Always is.”
After a bit of silence and rocking you gently, an idea sparks. He pulls his phone out of his pocket, finding the playlist he made specifically for when he thinks about you, and sets it on the counter. You stare at him in tired confusion, but when one of his arms wraps around your waist, you catch on.
“What are you doing?” Humor is laced in your voice, but the sweet look on your face tells him his actions are making you happy. That’s his goal, constantly. All he wants is to make you happy.
“Checking something off the bucket list,” he replies, slowly turning you to the soft beat.
“Something’s missing,” you say as he twirls you.
He steals a glance at the way his shirt rides up your legs, showing just a peek of your panties beneath it.
“What?” he asks, pulling you back to him.
“Sing to me.” You place your hand on his chest.
His heart betrays him at that moment. It rages, and he knows you can feel it. Chenle sings in front of thousands of people all the time, but something about you is different. Something about you right now is different.
“What’s going on up in there?” You run your fingers through his hair. “You’ve been all weird today.”
“I can’t stop thinking about you,” he admits. “Everything. From the moment we met up until this…it keeps repeating over and over again.”
“Welcome to my world,” you replied, grasping his shoulders. You massage them gently as you sway along with the music.
The confession from you makes him smile. At least he’s not the only one doing constant circles in his head. He calms a bit, and when a new song plays, he sings to you. Your body immediately relaxes into his, as if every stress you’ve ever had has left you without hesitation.
Chenle loves to sing. He does it all the time, and he only wants to keep getting better. To have someone like you as his partner, someone who supports him endlessly and genuinely loves his voice…it’s unparalleled.
He’s not sure how long the two of you are like this, or how long he’s singing for, but song after song, all he knows is that you’re smiling. You’re looking at him with unmatched adoration in your eyes, pure love. Nobody else has ever looked at him in this way, and he doesn’t want them to.
He wants to stay here with you and watch you love him in ways he’s never been loved before.
He stops. His singing fades out, and he furrows his eyebrows as he finally, finally realizes what’s been happening to him. You tilt your head, able to ask him questions without saying anything. His chest feels like it’s going to burst.
You’re it. 
You’re everything, and he’s going to marry you.
He’s going to spend the rest of his life striving to make sure you love him as much as you do right now, if not more.
It seems like you feel it, too. Your face softens and you reach up to trace along his cheekbone. He leans into your touch, chasing the warmth like it’s the last time he’ll ever feel it.
“I…” He takes a deep breath, shaking his head slowly. “I’m so fucking in love with you.”
“I know.” You grin so wide, Chenle almost thinks it’ll split your face in two.
“Good.” He brushes your hair behind your ear. “I hope I’m doing a good job in showing you that every day.”
You pause, hands trailing down from his cheeks to his shoulders. “I have never once doubted that you love me, Lele. Are you sure everything’s okay?”
“I promise you I’ve never felt better,” he replies. “Just checking in with you.”
“You do so much more than you realize. No matter how busy you are, you text me to tell me you love me or that you’re thinking about me. You practice non-stop with the boys but you still make an effort with me when you could easily use that as an excuse. There is not one thing I could ask for that you don’t already do.” You press a quick kiss to his lips. “I’ll never doubt you.”
“Sometimes I worry,” he admits. “You make me…want to be better. In every way possible. In my career, in my life, with you. And if I’m not being better every day, then I don’t deserve you.”
“Chenle.” You give him a pointed look. “When I think back to the first day we met, I remember how…how you acted from the first time you spoke to me. At the time, I really thought I was crazy, but I knew you’d be someone to me. You didn’t even know me, but you were so kind. And now that we’re here like this, you haven’t changed. There’s no getting better. You’re already the best.”
“How do you do that?” He chuckles, kissing your forehead.
“Do what?”
“Know exactly what to say.”
“That’s my special talent,” you tell him.
“We should get back to bed,” Chenle says, sleep weighing on him. “Meeting the boys tomorrow.”
He grabs his phone from the counter, his heart full and warm as he leads you back to his bedroom. This time, as he’s lying with you pressed to his chest, he’s able to fall into his dreamland.
Despite his lack of sleep, Chenle is full of energy the next day. He wakes up and makes you coffee just the way you like before sitting on the edge of the bed by your sleeping form. When he sets the cup on the nightstand, you stir, turning over to face him.
“You’re gonna be late,” you mumble, even though you have no idea what time it is.
Chenle chuckles, leaning forward to kiss your forehead. “I’ll see you in a bit, okay? You can stay here if you want. Wanted to tell you I love you before I left.”
“Love you, too,” you say with a tired smile, giving his hand a squeeze.
“Drink your coffee before it gets cold. I’ll grab dinner for us on my way back.”
Walking away from you feels like someone’s trying to rip his heart out of his chest. You’re an extension of him at this point, and after his sudden realization last night, all he wants to do is spend the day curled up with you.
Luckily for him, his day passes by pretty quickly. He got a lot done today, and he was proud of that. You’d be proud of him, too. He’s itching to get home and tell you everything that happened. Staying true to his word, he picks up your favorite takeout.
He’s going to be honest with you about what was going on with him yesterday. It’s the right thing to do—and in a perfect world, you’ll feel the same way he does. He hasn’t felt this nervous since he admitted his feelings for you. Even though that side of him feels worlds away now, he remembers it like it was yesterday.
But the restaurant isn’t the only stop he makes.
He’s shaking by the time he gets back. Is a year really enough time? It is for him, but what if you think he’s insane?
When he arrives, he’s not expecting what you’ve done at all. The main lights are off, but a dim golden glow from the strips along the wall and the candles illuminate the room enough. He sets the bag down on the table, completely forgetting about the food as he searches for you.
“(Y/N)?”
“You’re earlier than I thought you’d be,” you tell him, walking out of his bedroom while still putting in an earring.
His throat dries. He opens his mouth to speak, but no words could ever justify the way you look right now. You put on a dress, one of his favorites, and he’s in jeans and a T-shirt.
You kiss his cheek. “I figured you deserve something nice to come home to.”
“You’re my something nice.” He wraps his arm around your waist. “Should I change?”
“We’re not going anywhere.” You shake your head. “Just relax and enjoy your gorgeous girlfriend.”
“Oh, I can get on board with that.” He allows you to lead him back to the table.
Once he’s taking the food out of the bag, he keeps stealing glances at you. You put in all this effort for him, and he knows how much work it must’ve been to hang up all these lights. The golden glow looks ethereal against your skin.
“Before we eat, there’s something I wanted to talk to you about.” He clears his throat to stop it from collapsing in on itself, but it doesn’t work.
“What’s up?” You set your elbow on the table and rest your head on your palm. “Is everything alright?”
“Everything’s perfect, actually.” He takes a deep breath, reaching to grab your free hand. “I love you.”
“I love you, too.” You bite back a laugh.
“You can’t make fun of me for what I’m about to tell you.” He gives you the most serious look he can muster, and you nod.
“I wouldn’t do that,” you reassure him. “Tell me what’s on your mind.”
“I…I want to love you forever.” He gulps. “And when I think of everything we’ve gone through and been through together, I seriously can’t imagine ever trying to have anyone else fill this spot you hold in my life.”
You perk up a bit, gaze staring into his. God, he loves how interested you are in what he has to say. How you’re listening to him so intently. His thumb rubs over your knuckles as he tries to think of the words he wants to use.
“I want to marry you. Call me crazy if you want, tell me you hate the idea, that’s fine, but I had to tell you. We obviously can’t get married now, or probably any time soon because of my contract, but I want you to know that it’s what I want. It’s what’s going to happen if you want it, too.”
You clear your throat and cover your mouth with your hand, eyes welling. Chenle’s heart aches seeing this reaction, knowing you feel as strongly as he does. He reaches into his pocket and puts a small box on the table in front of you.
“It’s not the real thing. Not yet. But I want you to know how serious I am, because if I was able to marry you, I would’ve done it yesterday.” He opens it, revealing a simple band in it. “Subtle enough where people won’t ask questions, but we’ll know.”
“Chenle, are you being serious right now?” You sniffle. “This is a very cruel prank.”
“The guys and I sat down together today to write a song. I think you’ll love it, so when we record it I’m sneaking you a copy. Anyway, we were there for twenty minutes, and words were just flowing out of me. I wrote about you. About how you make me feel, and I think anyone who knows about us will understand that when they listen to the song.”
He pauses to swallow past the lump in his throat.
“I want you. I want to marry you and spend the rest of my life proving to you why I deserve that. Let me put this ring on you, and this can be the start.”
You quickly wipe your face as you nod. He takes your left hand, grabs the ring out of the box, and slips it on your middle finger.
“One day, this will be real.” Chenle catches another one of your tears. “I love you. There is not one thing in this world that could change that.”
His heart pounds in his chest as he watches your reaction. He wants to touch you and kiss you after pouring his thoughts out to you, but he needs to make sure you’re feeling the same way. The last thing he wants to do is overwhelm you.
His palms are sweaty and he can barely sit still. You groan, giving one last aggressive swipe below your eyes before you launch up from your chair and end up in his lap. You bury your head in his neck, squeezing him tighter than you should. He instinctively wraps his arms around your waist, softly chuckling at your outburst.
“You better not change your mind.” Cupping both of his cheeks, you try your best to look angry. “If you do, I’m marrying you anyway.”
His own vision blurs at the sight of you. You love him as much as he loves you, and you want to be with him forever.
You want to be with him forever.
The emotions rioting inside him surprise even him, and he blinks quickly to try and suppress the tears. It’s no use, because as soon as you notice, you start crying again. He groans and drops his head back on the chair, squeezing you closer to him.
“You’ll be the death of me,” Chenle says.
“Kiss me, you idiot.”
He doesn’t need to be told twice. His mouth finds yours, both of you falling into each other’s rhythm. Saltiness from your tears lingers on your lips. He weaves his fingers through your hair, but no matter what he does, you’re just not close enough.
Pulling away from you, he rests his forehead on yours. “You should eat, sunshine.”
“You expect me to be able to eat after all of that?” You furrow your eyebrows. “I’m afraid that’s not possible.”
“You’ll be sad if it gets cold,” he reminds you.
“I don’t think I’ll ever be sad again,” you whisper.
All thoughts escape him. Nothing else exists except for you, wrapped around him like a damn koala bear. He rests his hand on your thigh and lets your words sink deep into him.
Moments like these are hard to explain, he thinks. He’s only like this around you, so lost in his connection with you that he’s got nothing else on his mind. Anything and everything you say to him is tattooed in the darkest ink on his soul, until he’s covered in everything he wants to be for you.
“Promise me you’ll always look at me like that.” You break the silence, running your fingers through his hair and smiling.
“I promise.” He nods, barely realizing how he’s leaning forward.
Your eyes flutter shut as he inches closer. He kisses you softly, almost as if he fears he’ll break you. His fingers splay out across the small of your back and he traces shapes into the soft fabric of your dress. You’re overwhelming. His love for you is, too. So much so, he feels as if he’s going to burst out of his skin. He’s going to wake up and everything will have been a dream, because there’s no way he’d ever done anything in his life to deserve someone like you.
You hum into his mouth, rolling your hips once. His breathing stutters as his first instinct is to lift toward you. At first, he wants to stay like this, you clinging onto him like you’d be lost without him, but when you grind down a second time, he feels a twitch in his pants.
It’s been over a week since the last time he’s been inside you thanks to his schedules. And now you’re on top of him, wearing his favorite dress of yours, and kissing him like you’ll never be able to feel him again after tonight.
He’s tired, but he’s never too tired for you. Brushing your hair away, he leans down to kiss your neck, licking the expanse of your soft skin. Your pulse thunders beneath his tongue, and he has to fight the urge to bite down.
Touching you like this is different when he knows he’ll never lose you. You’re his forever.
His lips press against the sensitive spot below your ear, and the short moan escaping you just about sends him up the wall. When he pulls away to get a good look at you, your eyes are dark, lips already swollen from the way he kissed you.
He tries to catch his breath while he silently asks you if this is what you want. You nod, wrapping your arms around his shoulders. Standing, he lifts you up until your legs are secure around his waist, and he grabs your ass with one hand and the back of your head with the other.
Mouths attached, he doesn’t separate from you until he’s setting you down on his bed. He barely has time to appreciate the candles you lit in here, too, the soft scent of vanilla flooding his senses. You already try to push his T-shirt up, anything to feel his skin on yours. He obliges, pulling it over his head before returning to kissing you like his life depended on it. When your hands find the button on his jeans, he grabs your wrist.
“Patience, baby.” Chenle runs his fingers up and down your thigh. “We have the rest of our lives. Let me take my time with you tonight.”
Just like that, you’re putty in his hands. He smirks at the realization. Sneaking his touch up your leg, the hem of the dress moves to accommodate him. He stops when he feels the lace of your panties.
“Did you dress up for me twice, sunshine?” he hums.
“Always,” you say, shamelessly staring at his lips. “Do you love me, Chenle?”
His whole body vibrated from those words. They made him feel at a frequency he hadn’t quite reached yet, and all he wanted to do was rip that damn dress off.
“More than anything.”
He can’t really say it’s ‘like second nature’ anymore. There’s nothing second about it. This is you. Anything to do with you is first nature, no matter what it is. His world revolves around you, everything he does is based on what you want, and he wouldn’t change that in any way.
“Show me,” you whisper, so intoxicating he almost crumbles to his knees right in front of you.
How embarrassing that all it takes is two words to have him give in to you. He’s straining against his pants now, his cock aching to be free and buried inside you.
“Don’t worry. I will.” He kisses you again, soft and sweet like his hand isn’t so, so close to your dripping, eager core. Heat radiates from you, and all he wants is to be consumed by it.
He drags your panties down your legs, nails gently scratching your skin on the way down. Your chest rises and falls quickly as you try to regain your breath, but he loves the way you’re so desperate for him. The way you want him just as much as he wants you.
He doesn’t want to be patient anymore. Every cell in his body is urging him to connect with yours, but he wants to take care of you. That side of him always wins, otherwise both of you would probably be done already.
His finger dances along your entrance. He inhales sharply as your wetness coats his skin. You move your hips toward him, practically begging him for stimulation. He teasingly nudges your clit, pleasantly surprised by the way your body jolts.
Mouth brushing yours, he takes the second of distraction to slide two fingers inside you. As your lips part to release a moan, he mirrors the action, eyes fluttering shut as he slowly, slowly thrusts his hand.
Your walls squeeze so hard, he curses. He could fuck you a thousand times, and you’d still be as tight as you are right now. His heart goes straight into overdrive, but all the blood in his body is shooting down to his cock. He’s painfully hard, rocking back and forth gently.
He kisses you, lips working against yours in a perfect harmony. Your sounds are his favorite. He loves knowing it’s him making you feel this way, that he has the power to make your knees weak and your pussy throb.
He lets out a moan when he scissors his fingers, trying his best to prepare you. God, you’re so warm and wet and tight, he isn’t sure if he’ll be able to last long tonight. His pace quickens, sounds of your slickness filling the room.
You call out his name, back arching as you grasp desperately at his shoulders. He leans in and kisses your cheek, making sure to press his palm into your clit every time he’s knuckle deep. 
“You’re perfect, baby,” he whispers with his lips against your ear, voice rough. “I love you so much. So fucking much.”
You tense, pussy clamping down hard on his fingers as your hips buck. He swears he can see the pleasure running up your spine in the way you arch and shake. Your nails dig into his shoulders, but he’s not in the right mind to care. Your mouth opens, sounds pouring out as you finish. He loves you all the time, but one of his favorite looks on you is when he watches you orgasm—your face so overcome with pleasure he caused…he would never get enough of it.
He keeps moving until he’s sure you’ve come down from your high. When he brings his fingers up to his mouth to suck your juices off, you watch longingly, the dark look in your gaze enough to have his cock twitching in his pants.
You slide off the bed, forcing him to take a couple steps back. He’s not sure what you’re going to do at first. Your struggle to reach your zipper, and as much as he wants to bend you over with the dress still on, he wants to be gentle with you tonight. He doesn’t get to make love to you often, and that’s all he’s going to do tonight.
Instead of watching you attempt to reach it, he turns you around and pulls you to him until your back is against his chest. His hand is splayed out across your stomach, holding you so you feel how hard he is.
“I’m going crazy,” you mutter, dropping your head back. “I need you so bad.”
He moves your hair out of his way, kissing the base of your neck quickly before he unzips you. Moving slowly on purpose, he lets his finger drag along your spine on the way down. You shiver, pushing yourself back into him.
“I’m gonna make love to you.” He finally lets himself bite down on your shoulder as he nudges the straps down. “For the rest of our lives. Nobody but me.”
“Nobody but you,” you respond, allowing the dress to pool at your feet.
He turns you around, hands immediately finding your ass and squeezing it. Within seconds, he has your bra unclasped and across the room. “So beautiful.”
When your hands find his jeans, he doesn’t stop you this time. You push them down his legs, desperate to have him inside you. Once his jeans are off, you palm him through his boxers, and he needs you so badly, that simple touch almost finishes him off. That would’ve been embarrassing.
He takes off the remaining fabric separating you two before leading you over to the bed. You lie in the middle, and he climbs on top of you. He kisses you passionately, tongue already dancing with yours, both of you more than ready. His cock is so hard, he’s only half convinced he won’t cum as soon as he’s in.
He nudges your clit with his leaking tip, moving down to your entrance to apply just enough pressure before pulling away. You whine, desperate for more.
“Chenle, please.”
His head dips down as he continues teasing you, wrapping his lips around your nipple. You whimper, running your fingers through his hair. Having you so desperate for him makes him want to give you everything you’re asking for, but something makes him wait.
“Please,” you cry out, lifting your hips up. “Need you.”
He’s ready to fall apart from you words alone. Pulling away from your chest, he reaches down to line himself up with you. He watches you closely as he pushes his throbbing cock into your quivering pussy. Your eyes roll back as you arch into him.
Your walls swallow him, velvet clamping down on him. He clenches his jaw as he bottoms out and fists the sheets next to your head.
“So perfect,” he whispers, kissing your jawline.
One of his favorite things about you is how unafraid you are to look at him. Pleasure weighs on your eyelids, and you try your best not to close them, but even like this, you never look away.
He’s fully inside you, his cock seated within your fluttering walls. The last thing he wants to do is overwhelm you, so he gently rocks his hips to help you adjust. He kisses you everywhere he can reach.
“You always take me so well,” he praises you, nipping the base of your neck.
He’ll never get over how perfectly he fits between your legs, like this space was made for him.
“Move,” you tell him, smacking his shoulder.
He lets out a soft chuckle, but lowers his mouth to yours as he starts a steady pace. You squeeze him so tight, it’s like your body doesn’t want to let him out of you. He pulls out until his tip is barely inside, and then pushes back in just as slowly. It wreaks havoc on your body, your wetness squelching every time he moves.
He wants you to feel all of him. Feel the entirety of his cock rubbing your walls with every thrust.
Somehow, it’s hotter this way. A thin sheen of sweat covers his skin as he takes his time with you. Sure, he gets sweaty when he fucks you, but nothing compares to the close intimacy of love making—his chest brushing against yours with every thrust, long, sweet moans filling the otherwise quiet bedroom.
“You sing so pretty,” Chenle mutters, tonguing the sensitive spot below your ear. “You like the way I feel?”
Before he can even process what you’re doing, you wrap your legs around his waist and roll until you’re on top of him. He’s flat on his back, eyes flitting along your body like he hasn’t had a real chance to see it yet.
Candle light illuminates your skin, and the sight makes his cock twitch. He runs his hands along your sides, squeezing your hips.
Chenle likes being in control. He likes guiding you in a way that has you both in shambles by the end, and he truly underestimated how beautiful you’d look on top of him. You lift up, teasing him as slow as he was moving with you, but between the sight and the feeling, he feels an all too-familiar tingling sensation at the base of his length.
It’s too soon for him, so he decides to tug you down, holding you there while his eyes close and his head thuds against the mattress. He doesn’t need to say a word to you.
“Chenle.” You stroke a hand down his chest. “It’s okay. You don’t need to hold back for me.”
“Just…need a second.” He gulps.
When he finally catches his breath, he sits up, chest pressing against yours.
“This was supposed to be about you,” he says, moving back slightly to fit his hand between the two of you. “Showing you my love and everything.”
He finds your clit with his thumb, staring at you intently as your wetness makes it easy for him to rub circles. His other hand still firmly grips your waist, which only allows you to squirm instead of bouncing on him like you crave to do.
“I need to move,” you whimper, grinding down. “Please.”
He nods, loosening his grip on you. You brace yourself on his shoulders, finally taking his cock the way you want it. His nails dig into your thigh while he continues his work on your bud, and it only spurs you on. You move faster, no doubt trying to chase your orgasm.
His moans get louder, matching yours. If his hands weren’t so occupied, he’d want to squeeze your ass or tweak your nipples. Anything to bring you higher. He changes the patterns his thumb rubs, and it’s like a jolt of electricity runs through your body.
You curse, dropping your head on his shoulder as you nod. “Don’t stop, Lele.”
With both of you hanging so close to the edge, he waits until you’re sitting back down on his cock to buck his hips up. He doesn’t want to finish first, but he’s so close, all the warning signs of his impending high are getting far too real.
“Gonna cum,” he tells you, releasing your thigh to grab your ass.
Your walls clamp down on him hard, a long, pleasured sound escaping you as you grind down on him. Back arching, your head falls back. Your orgasm hits both you and Chenle like a freight train, and within seconds, everything inside him explodes, and he’s spilling his cum deep inside you while telling you over and over again that he loves you.
You crumple into his chest. He runs his fingers through your hair, whispering praises to you between head kisses.
“I’m gonna lay you down, sunshine,” he says.
You nod, and he turns you so he can put your back on the mattress. He carefully pulls out of you, putting his boxers back on before going into the bathroom to grab you a towel. This is one of his favorite ways to see you. Your eyes are closed, hands on your cheeks. You look like he’s fucked all the energy out of you, and he loves that he has the capability to do that.
He cleans you up, then grabs a clean pair of panties for you and one of his T-shirts.
“I have an idea,” he says.
“What is it?” You wrap your arms around him.
“You pick whatever movie you want, and I’ll go warm up your dinner?” He raises his eyebrows at you.
You fake a gasp. “Are you saying you’re going to feed me in bed?”
“After all of that, I’d agree to just about anything you want.” He chuckles when you shove his shoulder. Grabbing your hand, he twirls the band on your finger. “Wait here for me?”
When he walks out of the room, he stops at the doorway to watch you excitedly lunge for the remote. It doesn’t take long for him to warm up the food, turn off the lights, and blow out the candles in the kitchen.
The rest of the night is spent with the two of you sitting against the headboard, laughing along to your favorite movie while eating your favorite takeout. So many thoughts have come and gone from Chenle’s brain in the past couple days alone, but he’s more than happy he gets to sit here with you every night for the rest of his life.
He’s lost in your laugh and the way you smile at him and how you make his heart race with the simplest things. None of the other members knew about the ring he bought you, but he’ll tell them soon.
After the food is gone, Chenle cleans it up. There’s still half a movie left, so when he gets back, he pulls the comforter back so you can cuddle up to him for the remainder. Even though the candles have long since been put out, vanilla still clouds the air.
“Love you,” Chenle whispers, kissing your temple.
“Love you, too.” You sigh in content, resting your head on his chest.
He knows that means you’re only seconds from sleep, and he rubs your arm soothingly. The movie continues to play, but neither of you are paying attention anymore—you’re asleep, and Chenle’s thinking about what kind of wedding dress you’ll wear.
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runnning-outof-time · 1 year ago
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Sentimental | Tommy Shelby & Daughter!Reader
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Request: yes by @midnightswithdearkatytspb
Pairing: Tommy Shelby & Daughter!Reader
Summary: It's (Y/N) Shelby's wedding day, and her father has to make sure she has one last thing before he walks her down the aisle. She's never seen him be so sentimental about something before.
Warnings: just a bunch of pre-wedding fluff, mention of a death of a minor character
Word Count: 2227
A/N: it’s been a bit since I’ve written a daughter!reader story….I hope this one makes sense, and I’m sorry if I got a little too sappy on it haha. Enjoy! :)
PLEASE LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU THINK!
Comment/Message me if you’d like to be tagged in future stories similar to this one!
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"Right, love...you're all finished," Polly said to her grand niece as she finished doing up the final button on the younger woman's wedding dress.
"Thanks, aunt Pol," (Y/N) smiled, taking one last look at herself in the mirror before she turned to face the older woman. "Can you believe the day is finally here?" she asked, a giddy smile present on her face.
Though she was an aunt by blood, Polly Gray was more so like a mother in the eyes of (Y/N) Shelby. The woman who held the title of mother in (Y/N)'s life passed away shortly after childbirth due to the complications and conditions she found herself in. The Shelby's took little (Y/N) in, raising her in their tight knit family. Polly stepped up the most to help, feeling thankful for this opportunity after her son and daughter had been taken away months earlier.
Tommy, (Y/N)'s father, was thankful for his aunt taking it upon herself to fill the void that his daughter had, a void that he knew she would feel for the rest of her life. He wouldn't have been able to come out and ask for the help, and so he was grateful that Polly knew he needed it. Hell, he was young himself - only being a few days shy of twenty when his daughter entered the world. But now this child needed him, and he was going to do everything that he could to give her the world.
Even though her father married, and then re-married, (Y/N) stayed close with Polly, thankful that she had her as a constant in her otherwise rapidly changing life. She couldn't imagine any other person helping her get ready for her wedding.
"I can," Polly answered, looking at the young woman before she pulled her into her body for a hug. "You've grown into such a beautiful, young woman, and I already know you'll make the best bride," she whispered into (Y/N)'s ear, her words making (Y/N) hug onto her even tighter.
"You're already the most beautiful bride," another voice that came from the dressing room's door made the two women seperate.
"Aunt Ada!" (Y/N) exclaimed, her eyes lighting up once they fell on the woman in the doorway, "come in quickly, before James sees me!" she waved her aunt in, worried that her soon-to-be husband would be lurking in the hallways.
"Don't worry about that," Ada brushed her off, entering the room and closing the door as she spoke, "I'm pretty sure the cheering that I heard from his dressing room means that he won't be leaving it any time soon...until it's time to walk down the aisle, that is," she added, a grin forming on her face. (Y/N) shook her head, rolling her eyes at her aunt's words. "I have something for you," Ada announced then, lifting up the small box she was holding, "two things, actually,"
"What are they?" (Y/N) asked, eagerness present in her voice as she watched Ada open up the box she'd brought.
"The first is the veil that I promised you..." Ada started off, working on taking the piece of fabric out of the box while she was talking, "I know you mentioned you wanted the floral accents on it as well, so I tried hard to add as many as I could while I was making it," she explained as she handed it over to (Y/N), letting the younger woman unfold it so that she could take all of it in.
"It's absolutely beautiful, aunt Ada! Thank you so much!" she gasped once she was able to look at it in its entirety. (Y/N) knew that she needed to have her aunt make her veil for her from the moment she found out about her crafty side. Seeing it now, she was sure that she'd never put her eyes on a veil as beautiful as this one.
"Shall we put it on?" Polly suggested, making (Y/N) turn to look at her. All that the younger woman was able to respond with was a giddy nod, but it was enough for the older two women to begin working on making sure that it was properly pinned to her head. "It’ll be draped over your face once you're ready to walk down the aisle," Polly added once they'd finished making sure that it was sitting correctly.
"It's beautiful," (Y/N) swooned, turning around to look at herself in the mirror again, admiring the full wedding look.
"I have something else too," Ada spoke again, drawing attention to her as she went about opening the bag that she had with her.
"Ada you didn't have to..." (Y/N) trailed off, overwhelmed by the amount of love she was being shown.
"I brought you the 'something new', so I decided that I'd also bring you the 'something old' too," she started off, producing a pair of older-looking, nude colored heels from her bag, "do you remember these?" she asked the younger woman then, an excited look forming on her face as she waited intently for a response.
(Y/N) just about gasped when she saw the shoes. "No...those can't be..." she trailed off, at a loss for words at the moment.
"They are," Ada confirmed, her grin growing, "the exact shoes that you literally begged me to wear when you were younger."
"I can't believe you still have them!" (Y/N) was still in disbelief.
"I nearly spent a day rooting for them in my closet," Ada remarked with a laugh as the women moved over to the couches so that (Y/N) could try them on. "I knew I had to find them though," she added, waiting anxiously to see her niece try them on.
"Do you think they'll fit?" (Y/N) questioned, slightly hesitant to slip her feet into them.
"Guess there's only one way to find out," Ada answered, nodding at the shoes then.
She was right. (Y/N) looked between the two women before she slipped her feet into the shoes, holding her breath while she did it. She only let it out when she found that they fit practically perfectly on her feet.
"How are they?" Polly questioned.
"Perfect," (Y/N) responded, a wide smile present on her face as she looked at the other women again. "I can't believe you're letting me use these, aunt Ada," she then turned to the brown haired woman sitting next to her.
"I couldn't think of anyone better to have them," Ada smiled back, wrapping her arms around (Y/N) in a tight hug. "Don't mess up the make up!" she exclaimed once they pulled away, quickly reaching for some tissue so that she could dry (Y/N)'s eyes.
"This seems to be the perfect time to give you this as well..." Polly began, coming over to where (Y/N) was standing with something in her hands.
"Oh no not you now too, Pol!" (Y/N) blubbered, completely overwhelmed with emotion at the moment.
Polly didn't listen to her and instead opened her hand to reveal a bracelet that had blue gemstones encased between the gold band.
"Something blue?" (Y/N) questioned, looking from the bracelet back to her great aunt, her eyes already watering again. Polly only nodded, a smile present on her face as she came closer to (Y/N). The younger woman knew what to do, holding out her wrist so that her aunt could clasp the bracelet onto it. "It's absolutely beautiful, Polly," she whispered, too overcome by emotion to fully trust her voice at the moment. "Thank you, both, so, so much," she added, looking at both Polly and Ada, who each sent smiles back.
"Now you're ready to be married," Ada commented, glancing over at the clock then, "and it's just about time for the ceremony to start."
"It is time," another voice broke into the conversation, making the three women look over at the doorway.
"How long have you been here, Thomas?" Polly questioned, eyeing her nephew as she wondered when he managed to slip into the room without them noticing.
"Long enough," he gave one of his usual, ambiguous answers, but this time there was no hint of the impatience that he usually spoke it with. No, today Tommy Shelby was standing in the doorway smiling.
"Are you ready, (Y/N)?" Polly turned to (Y/N) to check.
"I am," (Y/N) gave an assured nod, a smile present on her face as she looked back at her father.
"Pol, you and I should head out and make sure our seats are still open," Ada stated, placing her hand on (Y/N)'s shoulder and giving it a reassuring squeeze before she grabbed her bag and made her way to the door.
"It's going to be wonderful," Polly whispered to (Y/N), pulling her in for one last hug before she went and joined her niece at the door. She whispered something to Tommy, something that (Y/N) couldn't hear, before she and Ada exited the dressing room.
"Ready?" Tommy asked (Y/N) once they were alone.
"Ready as I'll ever be," (Y/N) answered, letting out a breath then as the excited jitters started to build up in her stomach. A smile returned to her features as she walked over to her father. "Let's go," she said, nodding her head as she spoke.
"I have one last thing to give to you," Tommy stated, making her stop in her tracks.
"What's that, dad?" she asked, her brows furrowing together.
"I've been wearing this since the day that she left..." he started off, undoing the top button of his dress shirt so that he'd have an easier time taking off the gold necklace he was wearing. When he did get it off, (Y/N) saw that there was a locket on it as well. "This was my mum's. The flower on the front represents strength. The pictures on the inside are worn out, but the flower's still present, so I wear it for strength," he shared some details behind the necklace he wore everyday, holding it out for her to see it better. "I want you to wear it today," he finished his statement with a suggestion, one that (Y/N) was quickly nodding in agreement too. She'd never seen him be so sentimental about something before, and so she was honored to be able to borrow and wear it for the day.
Tommy smiled at her answer before he moved over and clasped the necklace around her neck. "It's pretty, dad," she commented as she got an even better look at the intricately designed locket.
"Your grandmum had good taste," he answered her, his words making her look up to see that he was trying hard to keep the tears back.
"If you start crying, I'll start crying," she told him, her words making him chuckle.
"I won't," he promised her.
A smile formed on (Y/N)'s face and she glanced down at the locket one last time before closing the gap and hugging her father tightly. "Thank you, dad," she whispered, trying her best to hold her tears back as he held onto her equally as tight.
"It's time," one of the ushers entered the room to announce.
"Ready?" Tommy asked his daughter as they pulled away from each other.
"So ready," she answered with a wide smile. "You ready?" she turned the question back onto him.
"Ready as I'll ever be," he answered with a smile of his own, one that (Y/N) wished she could take a picture of and keep forever. She'd never seen her father smile so much.
"Let's go then," (Y/N) nodded, walking to the door with her father by her side.
They were led to where the doors that opened to the main room of the church were. As they got closer, (Y/N) could hear the music that was being played as everyone prepared for her entrance. The butterflies started fluttering like crazy as she and Tommy stopped at the closed doors. In just moments, she'd be brought down the aisle to the man who would be her husband.
Tommy couldn't help but look at his daughter as they waited for the signal to go. He still couldn't believe that today was her wedding day, and that in just a few moments he'd be walking her down the aisle. James was a good man (he'd made sure of that) a man who had promised to take care of (Y/N) until his last day. As much as he didn't want to let her go, he knew he had to. She'd grown up right in front of him and become a young woman, who he was so immensely proud of.
"Ready, dad?" his daughter's question pulled him out of his thoughts.
"Ready as I'll ever be," he used the same answer that he'd given her in the dressing room, his response making her giggle.
"Don't let me fall," she whispered to him then, taking his outstretched arm, wrapping hers around it.
"Never," he promised her, sending her a wink and a small smile before the doors opened and they took their first step down the aisle.
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she-posts-nerdy-stuff · 2 months ago
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How to knit a Six of Crows blanket!
Hi my darlings, after posting quite a bit about my Grishaverse knitting projects I’ve had a few people ask if I have any kind of pattern or instructions for the Six of Crows blanket I made. I completely drew it myself and (as someone who has never designed a real pattern) figured it out as I went but I thought I’d do my best to put together a step-by-step guide of what I did for my one so you can try it if you’d like to! If you do this and share it anywhere then if you could please credit me for the design that would awesome <3
My finished blanket is approximately 117x120 cm, or 46x47 inches, and it looks like this:
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Yarn I used: so sorry I can’t remember and I don’t have the information right now but if anyone wants me to I can update this when I find it; I know that it was bulky weight though
Needle size I used: 9mm
Stitches you need to know how to do: Knit and Purl
Other techniques you’ll need to know: the fair isle method for colourwork, and possibly how to back a blanket but I will explain that in more detail because I had to learn how to do it for this project
Tags: @marielaure @spike-is-not-a-dogs-name @scenemime @worth-this-and-more @wisegirl29 @atac-agent @uttermywish @feralipadkid @fairytalesofforever
Guide below the cut!!
Step 1: the first thing you need is a chart, because this is knit in fair isle. I’m sure there are proper softwares for designing fair isle charts but I uploaded a photo of the six of crows book cover onto a free drawing app called Ibis Paint X, went over it in flat colours to create a more 2D design, superimposed a grid over the top, and then went round every individual square of that grid and edited the image so that there was one colour in each square (ie, pixelated it). The fun thing about doing it like this is that you can easily change it to be whatever size you want by changing the size of your grid (each square represents one stitch). As I mentioned before, if you use the same yarn as I did and the exact same chart as I did it comes out to be around 117x120 cm or 46x47 inches; it’s pretty square and smaller than your average blanket, which is perfect for what I wanted but might not be perfect for what you want so you might want to adapt that if you’d rather a different size. This is what my chart looked like:
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Step 2: casting on and knitting! This is the most fun bit, in my opinion. My grid is 103 stitches wide so and I wanted to have a border all around the edges so the first thing I did was cast on a full row in the cream yarn that I wanted to make that border from, with two more stitches
1) Cast on 105 of cream yarn. This should be the number of stitches across the x-axis of your pattern plus 2, to create a border either side. This cast on row will then create a one row border at the bottom of your work.
2) K1 in cream, knit first row of pattern, K1 in cream
3) P1 in cream, purl second row of pattern, P1 in cream
4) repeat steps 2) and 3) until the pattern is complete
5) complete an entire row in cream yarn
6) cast off - this is always so exciting!!! This is when you get the first real sense of accomplishment, in my opinion
I don’t have loads of progress photos, I’m afraid, but this is what mine looked like when I first cast off:
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(The edges are curled here so you can’t see the border on the sides, but it is there, also the lighting is rubbish sorry)
Step 3: Weave in all the ends. Gonna be super honest this step is deeply boring but incredibly important; there are a lot of ends to deal with here. Sorry I don’t have a photo of the wrong side of my work but if you imagine at least one loose end for every section of colour change you can gather that it’s a lot haha
Step 4: Backing!! Now there can be different methods of backing depending on what kind of fabric you choose, I can’t actually tell you what kind of fabric I used other than that the colour was called ‘luna grey’ because the label didn’t actually say what it was so I just decided to go for it. I could only buy it in metres or half metres so I had to get 150cm and then trim the excess. Remember to cut your backing fabric larger than your knitting!! - you need lenience to sew it in. I chose a soft fabric that wasn’t very stretchy. If you get a stretchier fabric you might want to use something to band the knitting first so that you avoid pulling it out of shape.
Lay the right sides of your two pieces (fabric & knitting) together and securely pin three sides.
Once your right sides are pinned together you can go all around your three pinned edges and sew together. Sewing is not my forte so if it isn’t yours either don’t worry, what’s good about this is that your stitches won’t actually be seen once the project’s done so don’t worry too much if they aren’t super neat. I used a running stitch and caught the underside of the knitting without going all the way through so that I knew my stitches wouldn’t be visible. If you want to add extra security, you can go round this sewing section twice. I personally hand sewed this, I think you could use a machine if you wanted to but be careful that the knitting doesn’t catch.
This is an exciting bit because you can really start to see the finished project
Once you’ve sewn your first three sides what you essentially have is a giant inside out pocket, and you can turn it right side out so it looks something like this:
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Sorry it’s not a great photo.
After this I trimmed off the excess fabric and just sat and stretched everything out to make sure it was sitting properly and I was happy with it. If you’re also trimming off excess fabric, remember to leave the same amount of lenience (I did about five centimetres/two inches) as you did for the original edges!!
Then fold your lenience fabric inside the pocket and pin it nice and securely. I used a YouTube video to learn an invisible stitch to close this edge and it worked really well once I’d gotten the trick of it, I was really pleased. I practiced it on the excess fabric is cut off first and I definitely recommend that, it was really helpful
And then that’s it!!!
Here is my finished project again:
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I am so overjoyed with how this came out!
I hope that this guide was somewhat helpful, though I realise it’s clear that I don’t write patterns and am probably not very good at describing what I did so I’m sorry if anything was unclear. If you try this let me know, and if you share it anywhere please credit me! 🖤🖤
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burn-before-reading · 4 months ago
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Love in the Time of Socialism
joost klein x artist!reader
art, mush, and ramblings about life
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warnings: depression (ish), burnout, reader character in some vague mental health funk
word count: 2k
a/n: slight prequel to blue is the colour of your eyes but can be read as stand alone. just same artist reader. vaguely romantic but just ramblings and getting feelings out haha. started this when I was in more of a bad mental state (lol) but im fine now so it got kinda tame by the end of it. still not proofreading anything
title from the song Love in the Time of Socialism by Yellow House
Rpf below the cut—
Normally Joost has to call you because its the only way you will actually look at your phone. Its more often that not you find yourself fixated on planning out your next project, and your friends have to force you back into reality. There was that one time no one had heard from you in over a week and thought you were dead, when you were just working. You hadn’t realized how many texts you missed and apologized for scaring your friends half to death. Especially Joost.
So now you leave your ringer on, and now they call.
Tonight, however, Joost calls and you aren’t in your studio. You are in your bed, where you have been for the entire day. and also most of yesterday. There isn’t a reason in your head specifically why this has happened. you MEANT to get up. Theres a list of chores and things to do just sitting on your desk, but you woke up late, so now nothing will get done. At some point it just became too stressful to even get up and look at it. You roll over and stare at the contact picture of him, smiling with some dumb fish eye lens he thought was funny. You debate not picking up at all.
But you can’t ignore him.
“Hi Joost.” your voice came through the phone more hoarse than intended when you answered, you don’t remember the last time you talked to someone. “Whats going on?”
“the others wanted to go out for drinks tonight, you hadn’t responded so I wanted to check you were joining us.” You could imagine him rocking back and forth on his heels in the middle of his living room while he talked, it was either that or pacing around.
“uhh..” Drinks at a bar was the last thing on your mind. In any other situation you would have loved to be around your friends, but right now you just needed to avoided as much as possible. “Not a good night, tonight. Sorry, I’ll have to join you guys next time.”
Joost felt like something was off, you sounded tired. “Is everything okay?”
“I’ll be fine I just… shit brain day. bad brain thats all. It happens.” You did your best to summarize how you felt without actually admitting anything, you weren’t sure how to explain anything anyway.
“ Oh Im sorry, would it be good, if I came over? I can keep you company, if thats okay?”
“you don’t have to, I’ll be fine tomorrow. I want you to have fun. ” you insisted, but he pressed on.
“I don’t mind, the group would understand. Have you eaten today?”
“Like… a meal? yes, or well, no. I had a soda..” You glance at the half drunk soda from the night before, now flat. “and uhhh..”
“I’ll pick something up.” You could hear him on the other end gathering things together, keys, wallet, probably his ipad.
“.. thank you. I’ll see you in a bit, I guess.”
-
Joost knocked on your door about an hour later. In that time you were able to get out of bed and make your way to the bathroom to change and make yourself somewhat presentable in front of a guest, and to the kitchen to make coffee despite it being 8pm.
You opened it to see Joost with a sheepish smile as he extends his arms out for a hug. “Hi.”
“Hi Joost.” you take the step to hug him, feeling his body heat contrast with the cold nighttime. “I’m glad you’re here.” the two of you head inside to your living room where he empties his bag of take out to reveal a couple different thai dishes and egg rolls. It was hard to not admit you weren’t at least a little bit hungry.
The two of you ate in mostly silence, making small talk about different projects you two have going on, or the fact that the two of you were in between projects. He done with touring for the time being and in the process of working on a new album. You loosely avoiding talking about any current work plans but mentioned one or two paintings you finished for a private gallery commission last month.
“ Just some paintings of animals and nature-ish symbolism. Honestly my heart wasn’t really in that one, but it payed the rent so.” you shrug and shove noodles into your mouth.
“Well now you have the time to work on your own stuff, right?” he commented, leaning back into your couch and looking down at you sitting on the floor instead of any of your own furniture. “Draw whatever your heart desires.”
“I mean I guess.. Im just glad to be done with the oil paints for now. I swear i think I was gonna die in my studio from all the chemicals. I dunno, I finished that whole project last month, I haven’t really been very productive since then.” you trail off and Joost gets a concerned expression on his face.
He sinks down from his spot of the couch to join you in the floor. The fluffy rug brushing against his legs as he adjusts his new sitting position.
“Its okay to take a break, you know.”
“I know I know, I just get frustrated. I never seem to have my energy directed towards the right thing. Whenever I have all those big projects from other contractors, I can brainstorm and think of all these interesting ideas I wanna work on, but I can’t because then I would get behind on the art Im being paid to do.”
“mhm.” he nods, to indicate he’s following along.
“ And then whenever Im done with those projects, I just get… tired. and my focus is gone. and Everything just feels…” you gesture the last bit with your hands, scrambling your fingers, to imply your thoughts. You aren’t looking at him, but you can still see him nodding in your peripherals. Joost always seemed to understand your thinking and explanations to things, even if you thought they were messy.
“Do you want to try painting right now?” he asks. you just shrug your shoulders.
“I don’t know what I would paint.”
“You can paint our dinner, or, or yourself, or your plants maybe?” he suggested and stands up. “Can I paint too?”
“Oh we’re actually doing this?” Not that you didn’t want to, but this self doubt had creeped into your mind again. That failing to produce something decent would prove that you’ve lost all your talent, your skill.
“yea we can have a little painting party!” he chimed, but he hesitated walking over to your studio to grab stuff, still giving you the space to reject his idea.
you looked away and started nervously tapping your fork against the table.
tap tap tap tap
“…sure. We can use my watercolors, Ive been wanting to use them more often anyway.”
the coffee table became a little more cluttered as you set up the paints for the two of you. Joost using an old set 24 pans and you using a newer set of watercolor tubes you were gifted last year and never opened. You watched as Joost immediately dipped his brush in water and started activating the blue paints, spreading it onto his paper in big random strokes.
“what are you painting?”
“not sure yet, maybe im painting you.” he looks up and smirks. you scrunch your nose up.
“why are you using so much blue. am I a smurf?” you joke and he just shrugs and points to your own paper.
“Just mess around, can’t be any worse than what im doing.”
tap tap tap tap tap tap
you fidget with your own brush for a few seconds lo get before grabbing a big mop brush and wetting your paper with clean water. Taking your smaller brush again, you pour out a small amount of yellow and mix it up with some more water. You hesitate for a moment longer before letting the brush lightly touch the surface, creating a burst of colour on the paper as the colour seeps onto the page. You make a few more random marks before switching to another warm colour and repeating the process, now watching the colours bleeds and mix into each other. You look at Joost paper and see that he is actually now trying to paint you, the blue fortunately was able to be mostly contained to the background.
“Do you ever think about what you would do if you weren’t a musician?” you ask.
“I dunno I think after this I could have a pretty successful art career.” he teases but sees in your face the question is more serious. “I don’t know. I started off with youtube, but if I wasn’t doing that… its hard to think about what my life would be like if I didn’t follow this path.”
“I always have this feeling deep down, that I made a wrong choice somewhere along the line. I was thinking about going to school for psychology, I also wanted to work with animals at one point, be a vet. I enjoy art, don’t get me wrong, but I just worry that in making it my job Ive just drained all the passion I had for it.”
You let the paper dry before staining the page with lines of dark burgundy, creating hands and a human heart. he hums as he listens, not adding anything, but simply letting you vent. beginning to piece together your mood from earlier. “I don’t have any jobs lined up right now, which is what Ive been waiting for, to work on my own stuff, yknow? I haven’t had the time ive wanted to make something for myself for a while. But now I just feel, I feel like ive been frozen.”
“things seem to be okay right now. I like what youve made. ” you look down and see the scribbles youve made with your paint. hands clasped over a broken heart. you shrug and smile softly, signing the bottom.
“Just a scribble, you can have it if you want.” You hand the paper over to him. “thank you for coming by, its… its nice being around you. Helps a bit.”
Joost takes the paper and studies it for a second. “I really like it, maybe I should come by more often.”
“If you bring the food we can have art nights whenever you want.” he holds up his paper. The blue bleeding into your skintone and hair since he didn’t wait for anything to properly dry. “I might stick to my ipad though, I don’t know why you like this paint.” he scrunches his nose at it. you laugh and it makes him smile.
You notice for the first time how bright his eyes look when he smiles, but you brush the thought away.
-
“Feeling a bit better?” he asks as he lingers by the door on his way out.
“a bit. like I said It was just a mood, I was gonna be fine tomorrow most likely… I still appreciate you coming over.”
“Don’t ever be afraid to call or text okay? Im always here to talk if you need. or just to listen.”
“definitely. Ive been meaning to uh, talk to someone about all this stuff anyway, you’re not a professional but ill keep it in mind.”
he grins and goes in for one last hug. you feel him slightly squeeze you and linger a little longer than usual before letting go. With one last glance he waves and head off. You see him pull out a cigarette for the walk back. It takes you a second to close the door. standing there watching him walk off until he turns a corner and disappears. Closing the door you sigh and go the clean up your living room.
You notice he left the portrait he drew of you. signed at the bottom with a smiley face next to his name.
It gets hung up in your studio above your desk.
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evermoresqueiswriting · 8 months ago
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riptide
“I was scared of dentists and the dark I was scared of pretty girls and starting conversations Oh, all my friends are turning green You're the magician's assistant in their dream”
summary: going on the camp's field trip to olympus because clarisse asked you to, meeting your father and clarisse's father and also, there are new updates from camp - luke gone, and percy's arrival
pairing: clarisse la rue x f!reader
word count: 6.7k (14 year old me would never believe me if i said i casually wrote a 6k chapter)
tags: mostly fluff, tiny splash and angst
series masterlist 3/?
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The date ended really late – you fell asleep on the beach, and Clarisse didn’t have the heart to wake you up. She didn’t dare, you looked too peaceful to disturb. You loved taking naps and whenever you were around Clarisse, you felt safe enough to do so. By the time you woke up, it was already dark, and Clarisse had put your blouse back on you because it started to get chilly. When you realised what time it was, you hurried Clarisse and grabbed all your bags before leaving the beach. 
The ride back home was quite long, and once you got into camp, it was really quiet. You and Clarisse tried to be quiet, and walked slowly towards your cabins, but then you heard footsteps. Both of you whipped around. Chiron, hands on his hip and Mr D, standing next to him. 
“Hi,” you waved.
Clarisse swiftly grabbed your hand to put it down. 
“You missed the curfew,” Mr D said.
“What– What curfew? There was one?” you hesitated, looking at Clarisse.
“Yes,” Mr D continued, “it was written, black on white, that you should be home before 9pm. And it’s, would you look at that,” he showed you his watch-less wrist, “it’s past 11!”
“We– I didn’t know,” you explained, “I- I mean– I can’t read and neither can she.”
Chiron shook his head, and Clarisse stepped in front of you, shielding you from their disappointed faces. 
“We’re sorry, we didn’t see the time.”
Your hand was grabbing tightly onto Clarisse’s arm.  
“Go back to your cabins and rest,” Chiron said.
“Yeah, cause you’ll need it for the cleaning duties you’ll get for the whole week or month, I still haven’t decided yet haha,” Mr D finished and walked away. 
You were once again alone. You sighed.
“I’m sorry,” you mumbled, not daring to look at her. 
“What for?”
“I should’ve read the whole letter, I should've known and now because of me you’ll have cleaning duties for maybe a whole month!”
“I don’t mind, I had a great time today,” you raised your head up at this, “I’ll do another month again if it means we get to do that again.”
“Really?” you smiled.
“Really, now go to sleep.”
It ended up being a whole month of cleaning duties, but neither of you cared because you got to be together.
Your summer was split between three people, Clarisse, Will and Lee. 
Fighting and combat with Clarisse. Clarisse was ruthless, not letting you rest for a bit, always pushing you to your limits. She had one thing in mind and that was for you to be the best version of yourself. You were progressing fast which she was extremely proud of. Just like Luke said, you were a natural fighter, and everyone noticed that during Capture the Flag. You went from hiding behind Clarisse the whole time from leading the fight. 
Archery lessons from Lee. Lee was also very insistent as a teacher. Never letting you rest. 
“Hitting a still target is easy, a child could do it,” Lee told you in his first lesson. “But no monster is going to stay still for you to hit it at your pace. So, we’ll practise on moving targets, fast and unpredictable ones.”
And he was right, it was much more difficult. There was no time for you to prepare, and see where the wind went. But after some practice, it was easier. He was a good teacher, after all. You were tired and sore at the end of every day, which seemed a bit excessive for a fun, safe, summer camp for half bloods. They looked like they were preparing you for war at this pace. And when you had some free time, you spent it with Cornelia painting and playing old board games they had in the cabins. It was a great way to relax. 
Alongside sharpening your skills, you also spent an absurd amount of time at the infirmary with Will. Michael was the one teaching you everything, with a tiny Will following you there too. He was absorbing information at an incredible pace.
“Isn’t he a bit young to be learning all of this?” you asked Michael.
“Yeah, but he’s good at it, so who cares? Surely not Mr D.”
Will was a really nice kid, and obviously a natural healer. With the two of you at the infirmary, Michael was able to leave for longer periods of time. Will and you often held karaoke afternoons while cleaning the infirmary. And this time, it was your turn to choose the song. So, You and Will were dueting ‘august’ by Taylor Swift when someone came in.
“But do you remember? Remember when I pulled up and said, "Get in the car" And then canceled my plans just in case you'd call? Back when I was livin' for the hope of it all, for the hope of it all "Meet me behind the mall" Remember–” you sang with Will. 
“You’re having fun here,” Clarisse leaned on the doorframe. 
You screamed, and turned around. 
“Clarisse! Hi,” Will waved.
She gave you a questioning look. They had never met.
“This is Will Solace, my brother,” you smiled.
“Yeah, y/n talks about you all the time!” Will smile proudly, before you shoved him aside.
“Betrayal, I said all of these things in confidence, but whatever,” you dragged him outside. “Go grab some more supplies, we’re missing ambrosia.”
“But it’s ful–.”
You slammed the door. 
“He doesn’t know what he’s saying,” you laughed, turning back to Clarisse. 
“Sure,” she smirked. 
“What are you doing here anyway?”
“I forgot to give you something.”
“A gift?” you beamed.
She took out a small tissue bag from her pocket and handed it to you. You opened it, and let the object slip into your palm. A ring.
“Are you proposing?” you joked. 
She rolled her eyes, and smiled. 
“I watched you pick this size when choosing yours, so you shouldn’t lose this one.”
“Thank you, it’s so pretty I love it!” you put it on your left index. 
Clarisse had the one you gave her on her necklace. 
“Great, don’t lose it.”
“I won’t!”
And just like that – in the blink of an eye –  summer was over, and it was time for you to leave camp and go back home. You knew it was time to leave when Mr D started yelling that those who weren’t staying for the year to leave immediately because he had enough of seeing you bunch. When you walked away from your cabin, you noticed Clarisse was already waiting for you at the entrance of camp.
“I guess this is goodbye,” she smiled.
“Until October, for the field trip,” you corrected her. “I talked to Mr D and he said it was ok for me to come. So really it’s only two months away! And I’ll send letters, I’m sure Hermes Express have those next day delivery types of… offers?”
“Sure.”
You fiddled with your fingers. 
“I’m going to miss you,” you admitted. “And I’ll miss Capture the Flag and being on your team, and I’ll miss sparing with you, and I’ll miss… seeing you everyday.”
Her eyes softened. 
“Only two months, like you said.”
You nodded. Then, hesitantly, you opened your arms. 
“What?” Clarisse frowned. 
“We should hug goodbye.”
She had her arms crossed, but then she uncrossed them and you went to wrap your arms around her torso. She hesitantly wrapped her arms around your shoulders. When her arms loosened, you let go. 
“I’ll see you soon Clarisse,” you squeezed her arm, before walking away.
“See you soon sunshine,” Clarisse watched you walk away, “I’ll miss you too,” but you were already too far away to hear it. 
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Once you were back home, the first thing you did was to go find your mom’s old walkerman. You had to go search the old boxes your mom had put away in the attic – it was difficult but worth it.
“Why do you need this?” your mother asked once you came out of the attic with her walkerman. 
“It’s for— my friend?”
“Clarisse?”
“Yes. Clarisse.”
When you told your mother about your summer at camp, it had included a lot of Clarisse related stories. 
“And I told her I’d send letters so we could keep in touch, but now I realise I can’t write for the life of me, and even if I did write something, she’s spent too much time trying to decipher what I wrote, and it's just not– good. So I thought I’d send her this,” you waved the walkerman, “and I’d buy empty cassettes to record things, and send pictures along with it.”
“Oh, that’s a very nice thing to do,” she nodded. 
“Oh! I forgot to tell you– to ask you really. Hm, there is this field trip at camp… in october. It’d be during the halloween vacations, so I won’t miss school. Can I go, please?”
“Sure, I don’t see why not.”
Well that was easy. 
So every week, you’d record what you did and update Clarisse about your life, you’d take pictures and buy her favourite snacks — you tried out a lot during your date — and ship it to camp half-blood. Clarisse would also send you pictures. The dinner, pictures of Will and behind one of his pictures he’d written ‘i miss u <3’ on the back, people training, their win at Capture the Flag, and you’d keep everything in a box dedicated to Clarisse. 
Two months. Two months at camp went by fast, too fast even. But two months at school, minus your friends and the fun at camp, it was slow. You woke up every day at 6:45am, got ready and left for school, came back around 5:50pm and did your homework, ate, washed-up, and then scrolled on twitter, fighting with random accounts, and then went to sleep. Your routine was boring to no end, but you tried so you could have things to tell Clarisse. But life outside of camp was boring and your mother could see that.
“You know, if you wanted to stay at camp for the whole year, I wouldn’t stop you.”
Oh.
“But, what about you then? I don’t want you to live alone in this big ass mansion.”
“I’m an adult, I’ll be fine,” she reassured you.
“I won’t, knowing you’ll be alone.”
Your mom wasn’t on good terms with her parents after they learned that she’d be raising a kid alone, without marriage or even a boyfriend. After you were born, they did visit and spent time with you, but never with your mom, their daughter. So she couldn’t even call them to come live with her. You weren’t going to abandon her when she only has you. 
“I–,” she put her chopsticks down, “I met someone at work.”
“What! What does that mean?”
“It means, I’ve been seeing someone.”
“Oh my– you’re trying to get rid of me to have—” you stared at her, mouth wide open from shock, “sex,” you mouthed. 
“Oh grow up y/n, I’m an adult, where do you think you came from.”
“Uh– rude.”
“I’m just saying, this is your last year in high school, if next year you want to stay at camp, you can.”
“And you’d be fine with it?”
She nodded.
“What if I want to stay here, at home?”
“Then you’d stay here, as long as you want, this is your home as well.”
“I’ll– I’ll think about it.”
And then it was finally time to leave for camp again. Your mom drove you to the airport and you left with your suitcase in hand. It was the longest flight ever, and the cab seemed to be driving even slower than a snail. An old lady on foot was faster than this, but then you were finally there. 
“Are you sure this is where you want to get out?” the cab driver asked, seeing the empty road.
“Yes,” you gave him the money, “keep the change, bye.”
When you arrived at camp, Chiron was waiting for you at the entrance already, and you greeted him happily. 
“How was the trip to camp?” 
“Great. Long and tiring for sure, but I’m so excited too.”
“Good, we’re going to leave soon, you can go put your things in your cabin first.”
The first one to spot you was Cornelia, and she came running to hug you. And then Will came in very quickly to give you a hug as well. 
“I missed you guys so much,” you smiled. 
“I wish you were staying here all the time,” Will said. “I’m all alone at the infirmary.”
“You’re leaving him alone?” you gasped at Michael. 
“He kicked me out! Said you had a whole system going on there and I wasn’t following it correctly.”
“He also wasn’t doing karaoke afternoons with me,” Will told you.
“How dare he. That’s ‘cause he has no taste.”
“I can hear you,” Michael stood beside you.
“Do you mind? I’m having a private conversation.”
“Yeah do you mind, we’re having a private conversation,” Will repeated. 
It felt great to be at camp – it felt safe, familiar and comforting. You put your suitcase beside your bed, and grabbed some chocolate bars  from your backpack and put them in your pocket. Will, who stayed by your side, pleaded with his eyes to get one too and you couldn’t resist. 
“I’ll give you more later,” you promised him.
You left your cabin with your siblings as it was time to leave camp. Everyone was on their way to the entrance. You looked around, hoping to catch Clarisse, and there she was, way ahead of you. You turned around, facing your siblings and after a brief “see you up there”, you ran off. 
Clarisse was talking to her brother, and she looked around for you. She was expecting you to be beside Chiron at the entrance, but you weren't. Maybe you were late? When suddenly, she felt someone jump on her back, and her immediate response was to grab their arm and throw them on the ground. 
“Ugh! Motherfucker,” you moaned, laying on the ground, with Clarisse holding down on your arm on the ground. 
“What the hell!” Clarisse immediately let go and helped you get up. “Why would you do that?”
“I wanted to surprise you,” you rubbed your arm. “Why would you do that?”
“You jumped on me! Are you ok?” Clarisse worried. 
You stared at her, dumbstruck. 
“No! I’m not!”
Just when she was about to talk, Chiron called for all the campers to gather around, and you left without giving her the chance to speak. Your whole back was aching, and you tried not to think about it too much, but that was impossible because of Clarisse’s strength. Clarisse tried to grab your arm to slow you down, but you shook her off. Then, Michael and Lee just had to get involved. 
“Butt off Clarisse,” Michael squeezed himself between you two. “Didn’t you do enough by crushing y/n to dust? So much for being friends,” he snickered. 
“Fuck off Michael unless you want to wake up in the morning missing your front row teeth,” Clarisse spat.
Michael did back away a little, bumping into you. 
“How can you be friends with her,” he turned around to look at you. 
Clarisse has been wondering the same thing for the past few days. The Apollo cabin and the Ares cabin weren’t known to be friendly with each other. They tolerated each other at best when they were on the same team for Capture the Flag, but that was it. And when you left, she started to wonder about your friendship. Maybe you’d forget about her once you’re back at home. And the first week, all she could think about was when – or if – you’d reach out. 
But every Sunday, at 9:00am she’d receive a package with your recording and pictures and candy for your siblings and her. You had never given her any reason to doubt your relationship, but not everyone in your cabin, or at camp, were thinking that way. Michael had been one of those people, always wondering loud and clear about your friendship. So that was Clarisse’s final straw. 
She grabbed Michael’s collar, ready to punch him, but Lee tried to calm the situation down. 
“Clarisse, please don’t,” Lee grabbed Michael’s hands, “he doesn’t know what he’s talking about.”
“He clearly does. He’s been talking about it nonstop for the past few weeks.”
You frowned. You looked at Michael, then Lee and finally at Clarisse. The pure rage in her eyes would make anyone run away, but you stepped up.
“Clarisse,” you put your hands on her arms, “it’s fine, let go please. Chiron is waiting for us.”
She locked her eyes with you, clearly still upset about the situation, and pushed Michael away, but Lee was behind to hold him back. 
“Clarisse, what was that about?”
“It’s nothing,” she shrugged, “it’s fine. See you.” 
And she walked away, leaving you confused. You turned around, giving a questioning look at your brothers, but Lee only mouthed a ‘I don’t know’ and Michael avoided your gaze. You were ready to argue with them, but Will came running, telling you they were ready to leave.
The trip to the Empire State Building was long, especially with Clarisse ignoring you. You tried talking to Michael, but he was also ignoring you, and suddenly, everyone at camp lost their ability to talk. Annoyed, you went to the back of the bus, where no one was. But then Will came. 
“What’s wrong? You look like Clarisse all the time. Frowning and sulking.”
“I’m not!” you relaxed your face. “Also while we're talking about Clarisse, what’s that about how we’re not supposed to be friends?”
Will grimaced, and looked away for a second. 
“People have been wondering about how you, sweet and fun Apollo daughter, could be friends with ruthless Clarisse La Rue, Ares daughter. Because the Apollo cabin does not get along with the Ares cabin, like at all.”
“And Clarisse was upset? Over people’s opinions about us?”
“Well…” Will stretched that vowel for far too long. “You know people, and how they love to gossip. And somehow it went from enemy cabins to how there are better friends to have… than Clarisse. And how she’s not… worth it,” he hesitated. “And she only brings you trouble… things like that.”
You were too stunned to give any type of answers. 
“Clarisse doesn’t look like someone who cares about those kind of rumours and speculations, but insecurities are created by people’s opinion,” Will said, “that’s what Lee told me when people were talking about me and I started to feel bad.”
“What were people talking about?” you frowned. 
“I’m not as good as you all with my archery skills.”
“That’s not–, I mean it doesn’t matter.”
“I know, Lee and Cornelia and Michael and everyone at our cabin was there to tell me that.”
“Okay, and they’re right.”
“I’m saying… maybe Clarisse doesn't have that sort of support system. And maybe she is starting to feel like other people are right.”
“Oh.”
You looked at where Clarisse was sitting, in the middle, sitting next to her sister. It was a four seat table, and her three siblings were all laughing and shouting, but Clarisse wasn’t. She was staring out the window, her arms crossed. 
You saw her frown and turned her head in your direction, but when she saw you looking at her, she quickly turned her head to her siblings. 
“You should talk to her, and clear things up. Because Clarisse is nice. I like her.”
“Since when? You never talk.”
“Clarisse is nice to me, she always has been since we’ve met that one time,” he admitted. “I think she deserves good friends. Like us.”
“I think so too,” you agreed. 
When it was time to get off the bus, everyone rushed out, separating you from Clarisse even further. Well, the talk had to wait. 
The trip to the 600th floor took too long. Every cabin went one by one since it couldn’t hold the whole camp at once. The Ares cabin went before the Apollo cabin, but Clarisse stood straight and looked ahead. She had her back turned to you, even once inside the elevator, but at the last minute she turned around and locked eyes with you. 
“We’ll talk,” you mouthed clearly. 
There was no escaping you. When it was your turn, you stepped in last so you could leave first. It took forever to reach floor 600. And just as you expected, there was no sign of Clarisse. She stayed close to her brothers. 
Each cabin had to do a presentation in front of the gods, and it was the worst thing for them and for you all too. Every time they clapped at the end, you knew it wasn’t as a compliment but more as a cheers to being closer to the end. 
After that, there was a big feast. The gods watching you eat and burn your food for them – it was weird and you couldn’t keep your eyes off your father. His tanned skin, golden hair, and bright smile. 
“Blinding isn’t he,” Lee said. 
“Yeah, I should’ve brought my sunglasses. Do you ever talk?”
“Not much. They don’t come just to hang around their kids.”
“He kinda looks like a classmate I’d have if people at my school weren’t all dressed like they just left prison. He looks young.”
 “You’ll get used to it eventually,” Lee shrugged. 
After dinner, campers just hang around talking, and some of the gods would come and talk to their children. You looked around and spotted the Hermes cabin staying together, far away from the main event, and then you tried to look for Clarisse, but she was nowhere. You turned around and bumped into your father. You quickly stepped away.
“Sorry,” you mumbled. 
“It’s alright. How have you been? Have you been settling well with everything?” he smiled.
“Um… Yes.”
What more could you say? You weren’t going to start saying the truth to this god that happened to be your father. 
“How is your mother?”
“Great,” you nodded, smiling. “She’s been seeing someone you know, after,” you looked at your wrist and pretended there was a watch, “eighteen years of having no one.”
“y/n,” he sighed looking away, “that’s just how things work with us gods. She knew from the start who I was, I told her.”
“It’s fine. I was merely stating a fact.”
Please somebody end this conversation, you prayed. 
“Well, well, well,” someone slapped your dad’s shoulder.
“Ares,” your dad greeted him. “This is y/n, my daughter.”
“Ah, the girl my daughter has been seeing.”
Apollo whipped his head around, beaming at you. 
“You have a girlfriend?” he held you in his arms. “I’m so proud of you. Way to go, who and where is the lucky girl.”
You stared at him, and then at Ares, mouth wide open in shock.
“I– I don’t! It’s– It’s not!” you stuttered. “I don’t have a girlfriend. Clarisse is my friend, who is a girl indeed. So yeah girl,” you paused, “friend. I haven’t been seeing her, I’ve been seeing her as in, she lives at camp and so did I during the summer!”
“Oh,” he let go of you. “My bad. You could’ve been more clear,” he looked at Ares. “Well I have to go now,” he walked away. “See you soon, y/n.”
Ares didn’t follow your father. He stayed with you, staring at you. Clarisse looked at you the same way when you first arrived at camp. 
“I feel like I know you from somewhere,” you admitted. 
“Well, I am the war god. They had to have shown you my picture somewhere between those classes they have,” he nodded toward Chiron.
“No, it’s not that,” you frowned. 
Meanwhile, Clarisse was talking to Mark when she spotted Apollo leaving in a hurry, and she looked at where he came from. And her eyes spotted you immediately, and then she saw her father standing tall, towering over you. 
“Fuck,” she mumbled before leaving the conversation without any notice. 
She rushed to where you stood. There was no way she was going to let you alone with her father. 
“... on twitter!” you shouted, hiding a smile. “Clarisse, I was just telling your father about us knowing each other through twitter!”
“What?” she mumbled, pulling you closer to her. 
“I’m always starting fights with him on twitter, because he’s always talking shit and nonsense. He doesn’t know me though.”
“Wait–,” Ares interrupted. “Are you that fan account of that blonde singer?”
“Yes!” you laughed.
He snickered, then stopped and turned to Clarisse. 
“Clarisse.”
“Dad.”
Then he stared at you, before going back to Clarisse. 
“You can leave now,” he gave you a brief look. “I want to talk to Clarisse. Alone.”
Clarisse, who the whole time didn’t let go of your hand, squeezed it. Hard. Before letting go. But you didn’t move, slightly worried.
“I–,” you started, but Clarisse turned to you, face blank.
“I’ll find you after this, go.”
You nodded without arguing and left. You quickly spotted your siblings and joined them, listening to what they were saying. You’d glance at Clarisse’s direction, and all you could see was Clarisse nodding, looking at her feet. Ares was in his human form, but even like that he looked impressive. He was tall and broad, he had these eyes you didn’t want to look straight into from fear. He gave Clarisse a final, firm, pat on the shoulder before leaving her there. She stood there for a full minute before straightening her back and searched for you in the ocean of people. But before she could find you, you were already on your way to her. 
“Are you okay?” you immediately asked. 
“I’m fine.”
“What did he say to you?”
“He…” she hesitated. “It doesn’t matter.”
You stood there, torn between insisting and letting it go. If you insisted when she wasn’t ready to talk, then you’d be a pushy friend who doesn’t respect any boundaries. But if you didn’t, then maybe it’d seem like you didn’t care. 
“Okay,” you nodded slowly. “Well, if you don’t have anything more to say, I do.”
“y/n…” Clarisse sighed.
“No! You ignored me the whole day when I just came back for you. And then that thing that happened with Michael,” she rolled her eyes at the mention of his name, “what was that about?”
“It doesn’t—”
“Stop saying that! It does matter. It matters to me how you feel. About this and everything else.”
Clarisse stared at you. Her eyes pleading with you to let it go. 
“I just…” you sighed, defeated. “I don’t want this to ruin our friendship. And I don’t—” you groaned in frustration. “Will told me,” you admitted, “about what people have been saying and what Michael has been saying,” you found it hard to find your words. “I– I want you to know that’s not what I think. And I—.”
You should’ve been rehearsing this. You took a deep breath.
“They’re not right about this. And I don’t want you to think that they are. Because you, Clarisse La Rue, are the best friend anyone could ask for. And because of you, I’m better than ever. I’ve been a better fighter because of you, I’ve been a better friend because of you. You taught me how to stand up for myself, and I’ve just been happier since I’ve met you. So I don’t want you to listen to what people have to say.” 
Clarisse still hadn’t said anything, which was excruciating. Just as you were about to continue ranting about this, she pulled you in her arms. You wrapped your arms around her, and put your head on her shoulder. 
“Thank you,” she whispered, and let go. 
It didn’t last long enough, but you’ll take what she gave you. 
“Are we ok?” 
“We’re ok,” Clarisse nodded. 
The rest of the evening was spent with you sitting on some big rocks that served as chairs, catching up. She’d tell about all the times she won at Capture the Flag, she’d tell you about the indigestion everyone had due to food poisoning that one day, she’d tell you about that time she had to go to the infirmary and only let Will heal her because there was no way she’d let Michael help her. She’d tell you about every little thing you’d miss during those months when you went home, and you listened to everything she had to say, with your head resting on her shoulder.
“Oh gods,” you straightened your back, pointing ahead of you. “Is that your dad with Aphrodite?”
“Fuck,” she cringed. “Are they making out?”
“I mean– he definitely is. It’s weird,” you looked away, then went back to staring at them.
“Stop staring at my dad sucking the goddess of love’s face.”
“Are you sure he’s your dad though? Cause Aphrodite looks exactly like you.”
Clarisse whipped her head around, eyes wide, staring at you.
“What?” she breathed. 
“What, what?”
She paused, still staring at you. 
“Nothing,” she smiled, and then looked back, “they’re gone.”
“Finally. It’s gross to make out in front of your children like that.”
All the campers spent the night in Olympus, all sleeping in the same area. The room looked exactly like inside a normal cabin at camp, with bunk beds and cupboards, and for once, friends from different cabins were allowed to sleep together. You dragged Clarisse with you, where the Apollo cabin stayed. 
“We’re all used to staying together,” you explained, “but you can stay with me. Are you sleeping on the top bunk or bottom one?”
“Bottom one,” Clarisse sat on the bed. 
“Ooh,” Cornelia sat next to Clarisse,” so does y/n.” 
“It’s fine, it’s only for one night,” you waved it off. 
“Did you see Clarisse’s dad making out in the open with their mother,” Cornelia pointed at the Aphrodite children. 
“We did!” you squealed, squeezing yourself between the two of them.
“I think everyone did,” Clarisse added. 
“Did you notice how Aphrodite looked exactly like Clarisse,” you looked at Cornelia.
Her eyes widened, and shook her head slightly. Clarisse was leaning against the bed frame, her legs crossed on the bed, smirking. You frowned.
“What?” you mouthed. 
“We’ll come back”, Cornelia dragged you away. 
“What?”
“Do you know what it means to perceive Aphrodite, the goddess of love, beauty, passion and lust, as someone you know?” she asked. 
“As someone I know? What does that mean?”
“Aphrodite doesn’t look like Clarisse,” she explained, “you perceive the goddess as such because you think Clarisse is those things.”
“Oh,” you paused. “Is that common knowledge or?” 
You hoped not. 
“Yeah it is, so you probably shouldn’t say those things in front of Clarisse if you’re not…”
“If I’m not what?”
“Nevermind.”
“I already told her, twice now with what happened a few minutes ago. Oh gods, couldn’t you have taught me this earlier!” you panicked. “What–What does that mean though? Do I– Am I—,” you gave a quick glance at Clarisse. 
“I don’t know! I mean, you did ask her on a date like the first week you arrived at camp, what could that mean?”
“I don’t know? I think she’s pretty, and– and apparently I think she could look exactly like the goddess of love herself. It’s—,” you took a deep breath. 
“It’s fine, you don’t have to know.”
“I think,” you hesitated. “I don’t know!” you whined. “Clarisse is nice to me, she’s fun to be around, she’s pushing me upwards and I think I might– maybe– perhaps have a tiny crush on her, yes,” you admitted. 
“Aw,” she beamed, “I think you’d make such a cute couple.”
“Calm your tits down,” you playfully rolled your eyes, “I don’t know if this will ever go further than us being friends. Now look natural, and never tell anyone else this. Okay, let’s go back.”
Clarisse was talking to Will when you two came back, but they abruptly stopped. Will stood so Cornelia and you could sit. 
“What was that about?” Cornelia asked them.
“It’s a secret,” Will smiled. 
“We were talking about how sunshine over there thought I looked like a goddess,” Clarisse grinned. 
Will tried to hide his laugh.
“No one told me!” you hid your face in your hand from embarrassment. “You could’ve stopped me the first time I said it,” you accused Clarisse, who was still laughing. 
“The first?” Will interrupted. 
“Both times in front of Clarisse,” Cornelia added. “It was hard to watch,” she teased you. 
Time went by very fast when you’re surrounded by friends and family, because it was already time to go to sleep. The lights disappeared, and you climbed onto your bed, and whispered Clarisse a goodnight before closing your eyes.
The silence was deafening. You couldn’t fall asleep, you needed white noises, music, anything but this. You tossed around, left your right leg outside the blanket, but then it was too cold, so you put it back inside, and tossed around again. 
“What the hell y/n,” Clarisse whispered loudly.
“Sorry, I can’t fall asleep.”
“Why?” she sighed.
“It’s too quiet, and I’m cold.”
Clarisse let out a bigger sigh, before getting up.
“Where’re you going?” you sat up.
“Get down here, and bring your blanket.”
You did as she told you. You put the blanket on your shoulders and climbed down. 
“Get in the bed,” she pointed at hers. 
You did as she told you. And then she climbed back inside her bed, next to you, with both blankets on you.  The beds on Olympus were bigger than the ones at camp, so it was no problem to fit you two in one single bed. 
“Better?” 
“Yes,” you nodded.
Clarisse fell asleep very quickly, like always. As soon as she closed her eyes, she was gone. But it took more time with you, you were used to looking at your phone until your eyelids were too tired to stay open, but now you couldn’t. You had nothing, only Clarisse sleeping peacefully next to you. 
She slept on her back, with her head tilted toward you. Unlike her, you slept on your side, so you turned your back to her, and closed your eyes. And just as you were about to fall asleep, you felt Clarisse arms wrapping around you to bring you closer to her. And then, in an instant, you were gone. 
The happiness from staying at camp didn’t last long as it was already time to go home and say goodbye to everyone. Your holidays came to an end and so did your stay at camp, and just like last time, Clarisse was already waiting for you at the entrance. 
“So,” you started, ‘I guess we’ll see each other next summer?”
“Yea,” she nodded. “Next summer.”
“I’ll be there as soon as I can,” you promised, “and I’ll keep sending you updates, though I don’t know if I’ll continue to be as regular as before. I do have my high school diploma to get, and I’ll have less time but I’ll do my best!”
“It’s okay, good luck on your exams. I know you’ll do great.”
“Thanks,” you smiled, but still didn’t leave. 
It was too soon, and it felt like you barely spent any time with Clarisse and your siblings. 
“Did you say goodbye to Will and the others?” Clarisse asked.
“Yea, before I left the cabin I did. It sucks that I have to, but–,” you hesitated, “maybe I won’t have to next year.”
“You wouldn’t?”
“I don’t know yet, but… it’s a possibility.”
“Oh,” she smiled, “okay.”
“Okay. Well… I have to go now.”
“Okay.”
You two stood there, without moving. But then you lunged forward and hugged her tightly. 
“I’ll miss you,” you whispered. 
And you let go, and left before she could give you her answer. 
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One recording per week became one every other week, and by December, it was only one per month. Clarisse didn’t send anything from December to February either, but then on a random day in March, you received a package from Hermes Express with Clarisse’s usual pictures from camp, without any notes explaining what happened those last few months. You didn’t mention it either, but you gave yourself a quick reminder to ask her when you’d be back at camp. 
“It’s almost time, are you ready?” your mom asked.
“Yep, a minute!”
Your exams were done, you didn’t have the results yet but that didn’t matter – your mom promised she’d send them to you once she’d receive them so you could leave for camp peacefully. You packed lightly – a third of your belongings were already at camp – and went inside the cab your mom had called for you.
“Be careful okay,” she kissed your temple. “And write to me about your decision, okay?”
“I will, I promise,” you gave her a last quick hug and closed the cab door.
The journey to camp felt familiar now, you’d done it a few times already so it was a stress free trip. So you kept your suitcase close to you, you turned your phone off, and walked. 
But something was off when you got closer to the entrance. It was loud. Louder than usual, and there were more people at the border everywhere as well, which were usually empty. You crossed the entrance, and most campers were wearing their gears, and weapons. 
“What the hell,” you whispered. 
You quickly noticed Clarisse, giving orders to campers, and walking around. When she turned around, she spotted you and ran to you, very quickly. 
“Why didn’t you tell me earlier when you were going to be here!” she shot. 
“I wanted to surprise you! Why are you yelling at me!” you shouted back. 
Clarisse stepped back and mouthed a quick apology.
“A lot of things happened while you were gone,” she explained.
“Like when you stopped sending me anything?”
She nodded reluctantly. 
“A new camper came in, got claimed by Poseidon, and then got his quest to retrieve Zeus’ stolen bolt, and…” she hesitated. “We know who stole it in the first place. Luke.”
“Luke?” your eyes widened. “As in Castellan, Hermes' head– former head counsellor?” 
She nodded again. 
“And now Thalia’s tree has been poisoned, meaning the camp’s borders are weakened and we have to keep them safe ourselves.”
“Okay,” you proceeded with this information as fast as you could. “Okay.”
“I was worried sick for the past few days! You didn’t send me anything like last time. I didn’t know when you were going to be here, or if you’d gotten attacked and died.” 
“I’m sorry! I didn’t know. Why didn’t you tell me this earlier!” you argued. 
“I–,” she hesitated, “I didn’t want to burden you with your studies.”
“They’re not important, this is obviously my priority and much more important.”
“Okay,” she looked around. “Stay beside me, I want to keep an eye on you whenever a battle is going to break out.”
You frowned.
“That’s cute, but I’d be much more useful if I stayed with the rest of the Apollo cabin where we’re needed. I’m a great fighter, I know,” you said before she could interrupt, “thanks to you, but I’m much better at archery.”
She stared at you, then looked down. 
“I can’t…” she whispered, “I can’t protect you if you’re this far away from me.”
“Clarisse,” you cupped her face. “I’ll be fine, I promise. You worry about staying alive, and I’ll do the same. It’s going to be fine. Remember, you taught me everything I know.”
She nodded reluctantly. 
“Okay.”
“Where’s your spear by the way?” you asked when she walked you to your cabin. 
She grimaced, and sighed.
“Gone.”
“Gone? Wha–.”
“Percy Jackson,” she spat. “The new kid, I’m sure you’ll meet him soon enough.”
You threw your stuff inside your cabin, and changed your clothes before walking out with Clarisse still outside, waiting for you. Clarisse was about to talk, but was interrupted by screams from campers at the entrance. 
You looked at each other and ran off to where the screams were, and saw it. Two immense bulls – colchis Bulls – coming straight towards campers. 
“Go find Lee, I’ll handle this from here. He’ll know what to do,” Clarisse ordered before walking away.
“Clarisse!” you shouted before she was out of range. She turned her head. “Be careful.”
She nodded. 
“Don’t die,” she added before leaving. 
363 notes · View notes
hannahssimblr · 25 days ago
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Beginning // Prev // Next
Hi Evie! 
God, I’m so sorry it’s been so long. Life is chaotic. I’m doing stuff all the time and I really haven’t had a minute. 
College is great. It’s intense. It’s so different to what I expected, although now that I’m saying it, I’m not sure what I expected at all. I’m not sure that I really thought about what it was going to be like. 
There’s art, obviously, a lot of it, and all of the time. We have drawing classes and painting classes, classes about composition, sculpture, art history and theory, and other stuff too that I can’t even recall off the top of my head. We were on a trip last week, out across the city drawing buildings and things like that, and it’s given me this new appreciation for how interesting Berlin really is. I’m learning about all of this history, and then recording it on the page by drawing it. I can’t really overstate how amazing it is to be surrounded by so many people who love art the same way that I do, and I’m thinking about you when I’m living my life like this, about how much you’re going to love it when you’re finally free from Tullamore, and you can go to art college. You’re going to have the best years of your life, so don’t worry about all that’s going on at school right now, and with Kelly and whatever. Things are going to get so much better. 
I go out a lot these days. Drinking, yes, but it’s not really like the way that we used to party and drink in Dublin at all. It’s so much more vibrant and fun, and there are all of these amazing bars and clubs with different themes. I got out with my friends like, three or four times a week, and sometimes I don’t even drink, I just dance, and that’s enough. I meet plenty of interesting people when I’m out, too. There’s always someone new to get to know. 
We did go to this club last week, though, it’s famous. Berghain. Jonas and some of the others like techno, which I’m not sure about yet, and sometimes they go there to dance. It’s open a few days a week, and you can go literally any time of the day, which is crazy. I mean, you can go in at seven in the morning if you want to, and you can get lost in there for three days. Jonas told me all these stories about the kinds of things you can do and… I don’t know if I want to repeat it. I honestly feel like you wouldn’t want to know. 
I mentioned we went, but really, they went. As in, some of our friends. Not me. Apparently, the bouncers are really strict about who goes inside. Jonas explained something about needing to have the right “vibe”, which sounds insane, but anyway. I have the wrong “vibe”, because the bouncers saw me and my friend Elias in the queue and they yelled “No!” at us from, like, a twenty metre distance, haha. It’s fine. We went to another club instead, and we had fun and met some more cool people, so I can’t complain. 
I also can’t say I’m not curious about what it’s like to get into Berghain… Maybe one day. If I do, you’ll be the first to know, and I’ll share all the crazy details when I’ve experienced it. I think the day I get in is the day I can say I’m a real Berliner. 
It’s Halloween soon, and I’ve recently learned that they don’t celebrate it here. Can you believe it? I hope you’ll be doing something fun, at least, to make up for my loss. Send me a picture of your costume if you are! I have a feeling you’ll come up with something dead creative, because you’re good with your hands. I think I remember seeing a picture of you dressed as a bee on your Facebook? Am I mixing you up with someone else? I don’t think so. It was so cool. 
Shane is coming to visit next weekend. Did he tell you that? It’s half term, or reading week, or whatever they call it now. I would have mentioned it to you before, but he’s coming with some college friends on a boys trip. I didn’t think you’d be up for coming. I think they’ve booked this dingy hostel somewhere, and I just can’t imagine it being your thing. Especially with you still being seventeen and all of that, it’s like, you wouldn’t be allowed in to any of the clubs and bars. You should come in the spring, though! That’d be fun. Maybe if you wanted to plan a trip for your 18th?
I feel like I just spewed a load of information on you there, sorry. I should have emailed you earlier, but I’ve had this project due, and when I’m not socialising I’m working on it.
Hope you’re taking care of yourself!
Jude x
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charlessainzz · 8 months ago
Note
A request for Lily bringing you to a race to cheer her up after a bad breakup and playing a little Cupid with Charles or Carlos ??
Stupid Cupid
thank you for requesting this! hopefully I did it justice :)
“Lily, I don't want to go to the race! He’s going to be there and think I’m stalking him”, you groaned. It had been two weeks since your boyfriend, well ex-boyfriend Matt, dumped you. He was a mechanic for Williams who had been introduced to you by your best friend Lily. 
“Oh y/n don’t be so dramatic! You’re going to put on your hottest outfit and show him what he’s missing, okay!” she said as she threw you the best form fitting jeans money could buy. Unknown to you she had an ulterior motive. Lily felt bad that she and Alex had introduced you to Matt and they needed to make up for it. Alex had heard through the grapevine that the Charles Leclerc had seen you at a party and mentioned to Alex he thought you were cute. So what better person to match you up with. The plan was to somehow get you two alone but how… that would be difficult. 
You and Lily walked into the paddock, your eyes darting back and forth looking out for your ex. “Lily I feel nauseous, I don’t want to run into him!” you cried grabbing her hand. 
“Y/n don’t worry! We’re not hanging out in the Williams garage today, I’ve got passes to the Ferrari garage”, she sing-songed. A huge smile appeared on your face. How lucky to be in the presence of Carlos Sainz and Charles Leclerc. 
“Someone likes that idea..” Lily joked seeing your big smile. She texted Alex that the plan was a go. It was time to get Charles in place. 
You both entered the Ferrari building and noticed Alex was randomly in the building. “What’s he doing here?” you questioned. 
“Uh not sure, let’s go find out!” Lily said as she dragged you towards him. That’s when you noticed he was talking to Charles. You felt your face go hot. As you both walked up to them, Alex started to introduce you but then like a ghost Charles disappeared. 
“What the-” Alex said shocked, turning every which way looking for Charles. Then he spotted him, he got snatched by his PR person for an interview. “Sorry y/n” Alex said defeated. 
“Haha no worries, I’m not important enough for him to talk to”, you joked. You linked your arm with Lily and walked to your standing area. Lily turned and gave Alex a mad look. Plan A failed, time for Plan B. 
You watched as they went through FP1. You felt like you and Charles kept making eye contact but maybe your head was playing tricks on you. If you hadn't known better you could’ve sworn he kept smiling at you too. 
“Come on y/n, let’s go find a table to have lunch. Alex said he’d join us later with some friends”, Lily explained. You both settle into a table waiting for your guests. 
“Hey man!” Alex said as he patted Charles on the back. “Thanks for joining our lunch!”. Your eyes nearly pop out of your head as you see who the special friend was. “You know Lily, and this right here is our dear friend y/n”. 
Charles smiles and reaches for your hand. “Nice to meet you y/n”, he grins. You shake his hand grimmacing at how sweaty your palm was. 
“N-Nice to meet you too. You did great out there!”, you stammered a bit. The conversation started slow but the more you all talked the better it got. Almost as if Lily and Alex weren’t there and they got the hint. Lily texted Alex that it was time to dip.
“Oh well me and Lily have to uh- we have to leave!” Alex stupidly explained. You and Charles looked at them with confusion and you so more with panic. They couldn’t leave you alone, not with him! Lily gave you a thumbs up and mouthed ‘You got this!’ as they both ran away. 
Now without the presence of your friends it started to get… awkward and silent. Funnily, Alex and Lily had actually hid behind some bushes watching. 
“Alex, we left too early, it looks bad now!” Lily cried. 
“Don’t you worry, I’ve got something to break the ice” Alex slyly says as grabs a tennis ball from his pocket. 
“What the hell is that for?”, she sternly says. 
“Well I don’t have a bow and arrow, so I have to improvise” he giggles. They watch as you and Charles sit there both trying to find something to say. When all of a sudden a tennis ball goes flying and hits your drink glass shattering it to the floor. 
You both jump out of your seats and look around for where it came from. You look at him and fall over laughing. “I think the universe is trying to tell us something” you wheeze. 
“I think the universe is telling us to get out of here” Charles smiles. You give him a confused look. “Let me take you out to lunch in town, somewhere better”, he says confidently. 
“Oh!” you grin feeling your cheeks blush. “I would love that”. He grabs your hand and starts to lead you to the parking lot. 
Lily and Alex jump from behind the bush and silently cheer. “You are the stupidest cupid Alex Albon”, Lily laughs at her boyfriend. 
“Hey! It worked though, look at them… a perfect pair”, he giggles.
You and Charles walked hand in hand down the paddock towards his car. Just then the one person you had avoided all day walks past you. Matt does a double take as his mouth falls open. Turning to meet his gaze you give him a wink and snuggle more into Charles’s side. 
Hopefully this match made by cupid turns out better!
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clairyclue · 5 months ago
Text
my thoughts on Majestic Rep’s RTC
it’s a lot sorry guys
tags: @jencattv @ray-winters @keatondj
(spoilers below the cut)
you can tell when ocean starts questioning her attitude and how conflicted she is, especially right after WTWN 
jane gets startled so easily poor baby
noel’s riffs are amazing!! (noel’s lament)
the choreo is awesome too!
mischa is a such a sweetie he genuinely cares so much about the other choir members 
mischa flipping ocean off before “i love you guys” haha
constance’s finger guns after “fornication” 
constance laughing at ocean out down jokes and then switching up is so funny 
i love oceans line delivery she’s like three seconds snapping i love it 
jane going from being able to move
fluidly during the songs to being stiff again she looks so confused every time 
ricky. just ricky ❤️
connie i thought the crystal meth joke was funny 
^^ i love all the dialogue in that scene i don’t remember it in original cast slime tuts 
fuck mischa’s adopted parents fr you can tell his anger is a defense mechanism because when he feels comfortable with the choir he’s so sweet!!
MISCHA FALTERING WHEN SAYING HES TALIAS FIANCÉ 
“THANK YOU FOR KILLING MY MOTHER AND INDIRECTLY KILLING ME” 💔💔💔
MY LIFE IS AWESOME 
(i’m gonna start categorizing by song now i don’t have much for WTWN and Noel’s Lament so)
jane dope 🔥🔥
mlia gives mad sibling karaoke vibes 
karna i see u bopping along 
the singing too is immaculate 
OK JANE i see u dropping it down 
TALIA
this mischa genuinely seems so into it he deserves so much credit in way of character work 
the way he gets all bashful during his Talia monologue 💓
background harmonies (constance is carrying and also i can hear her so well!!)
again riffs!! well done 
the choreo goes crazy!! this applies to all the songs tho 
the arms making a steeple 🥺😩
THE ENDING RIFFS 💔💔💔😩😩😩😭😭🥺🥺😞😞
the projection i’m gonna end it all 💔
MISCHA FUCKING CRYING INTO NOELS SHOULDER HELPHELPHELP and even once the dialogue moves on he’s still clinging to him and Noel rubs his back
“ocean why aren’t you talking right now it’s weird” (ricky in the bg: ☝️)
i love u connie awkwardness 
jane is so reactive to everything she hears like a little puppy 
“OKAY!! 😁😁😁😁” (autismo lore dump time)
oceans face when he’s explaining it 😀 to 🙁 to 😟
AND THEN SHE FUCKING MOANS U CATHOLIC FREAK (no offense to catholics reading this)
noel’s face me too bud 
ricky’s lore is kinda gross just because it wasn’t always this way. but sigh what can you do
SPACE AGE BACHELOR MAN:
ricky my little freak boy ❤️
spacedolls realness coming through 
“sure…😬”
rip ricky u would have loved therian tiktok 
little curtain face thing “it gets weird now :)” (•.•)
“THAT SON OF A BITCH !! 😡😡😡”
the emotion behind his lines the whole time tbh adds to the comedy (“i thought i told them !! 😕😕”)
the ending “b-b-b- bachelor man!” (“meow!!”)
we love u mischa hype man (again sweetest man alive)
constance’s “oh man!” was so agressive i loved it the one in the soundtrack seems so sad. this constance is less shy more awkward and i love it
THE BALLAD OF JANE DOE:
i know i know. but choreo. 
vocals!! ily jenna 
bg vocals as well!! 
the mixing 🥹
OK THE OPT UP????
the choreo at “a choir never complete” reminds me of the opening funeral scene from beetlejuice. definitely fits the vibe!
the borderline growl/anger in “and i’m asking why lord” yes!!!!
she sounds so desperate. crying. 
“does no one care?!” again the anger and emotion!
THE BG VOCALS AT THAT ONE PART SO GOOD THEYRE ANGRY FOR HER IT SEEMS 
the roller coaster. them being sucked back into it choreo wise. reverse looking. 
THE HIGH NOTES 💋💋💋
ocean being the one to put the birthday costume on means a lot to me. idk
ocean comforting her too 🥰🥰
janes birthday claps!
SNATCH !! 🧁🧁
ocean doing connie’s hair ❤️
savannah scene!! 
we don’t get to see it but i know the waltz is happening 
“ur ma best frand 💓“
^ and then ocean immediately snaps my heart again. 
“no you don’t ocean. 😕”
i understand oceans monologue she just. executed it badly. 
constance 😝 beat her ass girl 
“or they’ll call you a cow” baby. come here. 💔
constance. i get you. i get u connie baby. 
JAWBREAKER/SUGAR CLOUD:
oceans face ❤️ i don’t know how to describe it but she looks. proud. and her sitting almost re-evaluating everything in the back. (assuming)
ricky giving her the mic ❤️
HER GIGGLE
them scooting her around aghhhahahdhdbdheh
cloud props!
CONFETTI AND BALLOONS AND IM SMILING LIKE A FOOL
jane looks so happy with her ballon skipping around 🥹
the ending!! ILY CONSTANCE 
mischa helping her down awww
ocean and connie hug!!
can’t forget the nischa hug
ocean losing her voice inflection and sounding so genuine. so scared. so raw. 
janey when she gets chosen 🥹🥹
ocean and connie hug 2
JANE REACHING FOR RICKY SNDBDJWKDJDKF
ITS NOT A GAME/ITS JUST A RIDE
crying over the ending brb 
the slideshow will always get me 
something about the whole scene. houfhhhhhhh
“and you give and choose while you live and lose” and the lines preceding it get me 🥹
ARE THOSE REAL VIDEOS OF JENNA?!?!?!
KARNA SOUNDING LIKE THEYRE GONNA CRY
the first lines of it’s just a ride. no music. so raw sounding 🥹 the teary voices. the haphazard harmonies. 
ocean and mischa holding each other. big bro little sis 💓
“WOO!”
THEIR FREESTYLE DANCING! 
they’re having so much fun. they’re dead but they’re LIVING for the first time. 
all of the hand holding. my babes. 
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fashionteahouse · 1 month ago
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Love your stuff!!
Please can I see an Embry x reader who just found out they have autoimmune diseases?? But he took her to the ER and that’s how he found out. Make it long if you can???
I stalk your page it’s embarrassing 🫣🫣😜
omg thank you! 💜 ofc you can and i’m honored haha ;) hope you enjoy :)
it is what it is - embry x reader
Waking up in the morning, exhaustion never left. Making sure to get extra of couple hours of sleep still made you a bit tired. When plans were falling through, getting dressed or going to the kitchen to get some water was sometimes a hassle. You noticed some shortness of breath. You were used to it all. You didn’t pay it too much mind.
Getting diagnosed was hard. You didn’t know what this would mean for the rest of your everyday life.
“It’s when the immune system attacks the body’s healthy cells and tissues instead of protecting it.”
You vividly remember the doctor’s voice saying this statement to you. Many doctors told you different things about how it was nothing or it could’ve been vitamin deficiency. You knew your body and you knew it wasn’t just “nothing.” Admittedly, you weren’t vocal with the newly found diagnosis. Trying to find the right time was your agenda.
You had your good days and your not so good days. Today, you tried your best to push through.
“It is what it is” you say to yourself, feeling strong enough to carry out the rest of your day. Not letting sickness win. You were determined to make it a mind over matter type of thing.
Embry picks you up and takes you to a bonfire, excited for you to finally hear the legends. You were excited to just be around him. Encasing his hands with yours, he guided you to the sand filled area and you saw the groups of people who decided to attend. Everyone was glad to see you and as were you.
Things were going smooth. Laughing and talking with everyone made you forget about what was going on with you. Going across the beach to get a drink left you breathless. Embry put a soft hand on your back, giving you a look of concern.
“Are you alright?” he asks.
You didn’t want him to worry. You’ve dealt with days like this before. “I’m okay. Just overdid myself that’s all.” you tell him.
As the bonfire progresses and you’re listening to the legends that the elders are telling, you feel a pain come on in your chest. You discreetly try to rub it but Embry kept a good eye on you, knowing something wasn’t right.
“Y/N, are you okay?” he whispers to you as a gruff voice who is speaking, is now background noise.
You nod.
The stories are over and you begin to stand, but dizziness doesn’t cease. Embry holds you upright to keep you from falling and hurting yourself. The pressure in your chest turn great. Your face twists with pain. You couldn’t take it. It was unbearable.
“I’m taking you to the hospital.” he says as he watched you crumble in pain before him.
Embry’s face was contorted with concern. Disbelief was swirling around him as the doctors read your medical chart and he found out that autoimmune diseases were evident.
Hands holding his head, he wished he had known sooner. Lying in the uncomfortable hospital bed, you were bummed about having to spend the night. The doctors wanted to monitor you but Embry’s emotions that showed, hurt you more than the pain that you felt.
Holding your hand carefully, not knowing if your joints are sore, he stares directly into your eyes.
“Why did you keep this from me?” he asked, he genuinely wanted to know why.
You muster up a shrug, you were scared to say anything to anyone. You were still trying to figure out how to go about life with what you’re dealing with.
“I’m so sorry. I was going to tell you but…”
“I’m supposed to take care of you. Promise me you won’t keep anything else away from me.” he says, not leaving your bedside.
“I promise.”
Being released, Embry really watched over you like a hawk. You explained to him the symptoms you have experienced and might experience. This made him on the edge of his seat.
“This is kind of why I wanted to take my time to tell you.” you tell him as he displays wordiness.
“Yeah but, who knows what would’ve happened if I wasn’t there.” he says and he has a point.
He asked a lot of questions. You happily answered them. You appreciated the genuine curiosity, he wasn’t shied away from you or your conditions. You appreciated the fact he was trying to make sure that you were okay. You even went as far as letting him know the lifestyle changes that you made. Avoiding certain foods that could cause flare ups and eating more healthier foods.
One day, you woke up feeling horrible. Your body felt heavy and you found it hard to move. A flare up was incoming. You phoned Embry with the last bit of energy that you could produce. He rushed over and he was by your side.
“I’m here.” he says to you as he comforts you. He spent the entire day with you. Getting up to fetch you something to eat, putting on the things that you liked to watch, made you forget about the sad reality of being stuck in bed. Everything was better when Embry was around. You felt weak and old at first but Embry constantly hammered in your brain that this is something you couldn’t help.
“I kind of miss the old me.” you say to him as the dusk started to set in. He looks down at you beside him, puzzled.
“The old you? What do you mean?”
“Without me being sick. I could do so much and now…I feel like I could do so little right now.” you confess to him.
“You’re always you. I love you for you.” he says seriously and you feel your heart warm up like warm weather. He reaches down, steals your lips with his, and keeps you close to him.
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sweetzscore · 8 months ago
Text
What if I fakeposted about my ocs. What then
-24 notes
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🛸 ang3l-baby follow
Me: [after talking about aliens n space for 3 hours] I dunno I just think they’re kinda neat
🌌 cosmicgirlthing follow
Your record is actually four hours
🛸 ang3l-baby
Sometimes I just black out and talk about doctor who a lot too
32 notes
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💣 emooooeeeekid follow
Ive had girlfriends before which is really weird because I am the most idiotic loser ever. Bitch what do you see in me
🌌 cosmicgirlthing follow
This is true you are very much a loser
🎬 samthehotdog follow
I second this
💣 emooooeeeekid
Listen here you little shits
128 notes
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🎬 samthehotdog follow
I’m very publicly intersex and my favourite thing about this is that I am a high schooler and my classmates get rlly confused all the time and its so funny
🎬 samthehotdog
I like to ask them why they’re so interested in my dick (or lack thereof) and they usually just combust or something
💣 emooooeeeekid follow
high schoolers are very invasive an insensitive so I like to give them the funniest answers possible
I once told a kid that when I was born they asked me if I wanted a dick or a vag and I couldn’t decide so they gave me one of those multicolour pens where you click down the things to get the new colour
🎬 samthehotdog
That. Is the best thing I have ever heard
241 notes
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🍊 bowser-jrjrjrjr follow
Theres so many fucking fags at my school I hate this stupid place
🌌 cosmicgirlthing follow
What are you doing on this website
🍊 bowser-jrjrjrjr
Stfu tranny
🛸 ang3l-baby follow
I go to OP’s school and I can confirm he is very stupid and mean and nobody with any sense actually likes him
🎬 samthehotdog follow
Lmaooo
339 notes
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💣 emooooeeeekid follow
Vent under the cut
read more
💣 emooooeeeekid
Fuckin got you didn’t I
🌌 cosmicgirlthing follow
Go fuck yourself
💣 emooooeeeekid
Don’t mind if I do
🧢 jord-the-trans follow
There’s something wrong with both of you
63 notes
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💣 emooooeeeekid follow
>be me
>have a crush on a guy
>guy likes someone else
>other guy is homophobic, used to be my friend but dropped me when I came out
>dont have the heart to tell my crush
Hes gonna get his heart broken either way and like :((( UGHH i just want him to like me
🎬 samthehotdog follow
Oof thats rough pal
🧢 jord-the-trans follow
Yeah Im real sorry abt that Val :(
A little off topic but I didn’t know you had a crush?
💣 emooooeeeekid
Haha nope. No crush here. I dont have any crushes nosireee
🌌 cosmicgirlthing follow
Real subtle mate
42 notes
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🛸 ang3l-baby follow
Im just gonna make it clear right now if you don’t think that straight aces are lgbt i need you to get the fuck off my blog right now
🌌 cosmicgirlthing follow
are you vagueposting abt your boyfriend’s haters
🛸 ang3l-baby
Die mad
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anonymous asked: wait you have a boyfriend ???
🛸 ang3l-baby follow
Actually @:reedinthemarsh isn’t my boyfriend he’s my wife
🍬 reedinthemarsh follow
When did we get married also when did I transition???
🛸 ang3l-baby
It’s only a matter of time
💣 emooooeeeekid follow
GELP???
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💣 emooooeeeekid follow
My parents think that me being non-binary might be confusing for my little brothers but I explained it to them once and they immediately understood, said “okay” and then asked me what my 2nd favourite colour was
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🌌 cosmicgirlthing follow
URL check
Cosmic: nope
Girl: nope
Thing: sure why not
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barrenclan · 1 year ago
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I think overarching plot is relatively easy to come up with, but how do you come up with smaller more filler-like events for your stories, like the plum-bee spats and corm training with egret? I’m having some trouble filling in the flesh of my own story, and was wondering if you had any insight.
Oh boy, real softball questions! Haha, but I can try to give you an answer for these.
I think the best way I can explain the first question is how I wrote PATFW, since it was much more heavily structured than my other comic (and more recent).
So, I started with the premise, the characters, and the general arcs I wanted each of them to go through. The premise helped me to establish the guidelines of this world, what kind of tone I would have for the story - moody and mysterious, so I knew that comedy would not be as frequent and characters might often take a turn towards more realistic drama.
The arcs of each character came with understanding what I wanted to do with them - do I want this person to get better, or get worse? Will they be a force of antagonism, or a side character, will they live or die? What point am I trying to get across with this character? Those kind of questions helped me know how they would interact with each other as well, so for instance a character like Daffodilpaw being friendly and cheerful, with her arc, would interact a specific way with dramatic and egotistical Beeface, for her arc. (Sorry I can't be more specific, but the comic's not done yet.)
Once you have a strong understanding these things - tone and characters - it's not too hard to let the story percolate in your mind. There's nothing wrong with just letting ideas float around in the back of your brain, instead of trying to force them all out right away. I actually wrote the ending of PATFW a couple months after I had started the comic, because the characters naturally led me to that conclusion. Here's an example of what I'm talking about with tone and characters leading to a small interaction that I hadn't previously planned like you asked about:
I have Rainhaze, and Ranger. Rainhaze is kind and brave, but currently very lost. Ranger is sadistic and enjoys feeling in control. So, I need a plot reason for Ranger to have not found BarrenClan. Well, Rainhaze being self-sacrificial, told him that BarrenClan all died and he's the last survivor. When Ranger finds out, it makes him feel tricked - he doesn't like that, so he threatens to kill Rainhaze. Rainhaze is self-sacrificial, as previously mentioned, and is now showing some suicidal tendencies, so he doesn't care if Ranger kills him. But Ranger then refuses to do so, having regained control, and twists the knife by letting him live while feeling suicidal. That's a pretty grim scene, which fits with the tone of the story well.
There you go - that's an interaction I hadn't plotted out the story with, but I was able to come to naturally by understanding the characters, the way their arcs are moving, and the tone of the story.
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For this question, it's a little more tricky. The sad, honest answer is that there is no reliable way to do this. That's kind of how the Internet works. Unless you pay money to advertise, I suppose, you can't push a button that says "popularity points" and have it spit out readers. And sadly, sometimes movement only comes after you grind away, day after day, and don't give up. Here's a few things that might help, though.
Use multiple platforms. It's simple, but the more places you post, the more eyes you'll catch. Different websites/apps have different readerbases, too - Webtoons, ComicFury, Instagram, DeviantArt, Tumblr, Hiveworks, and others all have varying levels of attention and algorithims, and work that you have to do to keep up with an audience. Find whatever feels right for you and focus on one or two, but keep the others in your periphery.
Be consistent. People are more likely to actually keep up with a comic that updates every single week, rather than that posts a page or two and then ghosts for a month. Cough, cough, maybe you'll say - but I always set out with this comic to be a side project, and posting asks like this helps me continue to engage with an audience even when I'm not completing issues.
DON'T CARE! I know that seems like counterproductive advice, but seriously; you have to be okay with the fact that you might not get any attention. If you make a comic with the set goal of being popular, or even just worry about having readers, you're going to make yourself miserable. Obviously having attention is more fun, and more motivating, I won't deny that. But you need to be just as happy making a comic for 3 people than 3000 to make something you're proud of and not burn out in the process. If you're making something earnest, fun, interesting, passionate - people will come eventually.
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gem-de-lune · 19 days ago
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Helloo! Thank you for all the readings ever since and for the update today! My question is abt you if its not too intruding. If it is, you could just ignore this! That’s totally fine i just got curious because i am a believer of energy and vibrations but i don’t know the specifics of it yet such as to how to communicate or protect them and sorts. I just think tarot is just one way to go around this.
Anyways, how did you get into tarot reading? And how are you doing your practice to improve your intuition(?), if thats the right term for it😅
Aside from helpful and hopeful, I find your readings interesting. I feel like you’re more attuned to people’s energy as opposed to the other readers i see online. You seem more detailed because the other readers comes off as general when they do read like it’d make me think ‘isn’t that just common sense?’
I didn’t know before that people you read can give permission or not if they like 😲 Maybe it’s because it’s the first time I’ve seen a daily reading of someone but how exactly does that work. To what part of the person exactly are you asking? Also, I remember one of your readings where you asked all members and that there were members who were much more open and quicker to respond. I don’t know why but i just imagined little souls of them lining up and all 😭
Oh, when you read do you see a vision on your head or do you hear words? And how does your practice differ from others?
Sorry i thought I was going to ask a few questions only but more questions pop up as I typed this haha. I’m actually curious more than I thought. Again if all this feels too intrusive you don’t have to answer! Sometimes, my curiosity just gets to me.
Thanks again btw! We really appreciate you 🧡
Oooooh i will answer to the best of my ability since a few of yall have been asking something similar and this ask has all those questions compiled lmao.
A- I got into Tarot by essentially ordering a deck and just started doing personal readings for myself right away. I used Tumblr and TarotForum.net (not active to use anymore, but you can research card combinations here, and it is very helpful). I highly recommend just starting with the regular Rider Waite deck bc you need to learn what the most generic cards mean to make things easy later.
B- As for how i practice and improve, as I got more familiar and understanding, i realized there were basically multiple ways to connect energetically for a tarot reading. you could connect to a higher power/diety, or to an individual's subconsious/energy. From there, I began meditating- specifically chakra training, awareness meditations, and Kundalini Awakening Meditation to train my intuition and spiritual connections. At that time, I was connecting to what I call "the universe" mainly. However, the Universe is very finnicky. Sometimes they answer me, and sometimes they do not, and there is no way of me forcing it. I did not realize this until a bit later ofc bc sometimes when you start out, you are not sure of how you should be feeling or what feelings to trust.
But yeah so as I worked on my Chakra training I kind of naturally gravitated more towards people rather than only the Universe, because it makes for a more accurate palatable reading in simple human terms. The Universe and Dieties will always try to tell you more profound and big picture things, but sometimes you do not need all of that. You just need the most simple explaination. So in most instances, I request for the Universe to assist- but only assist rather than getting all my answers from them. And I ask them to be simple and specific on purpose otherwise the message is way too philosophical and weird bc they are trying to tell me the grand plan of things rather than the details- which is what Humans are more focused on. Reading by connecting to the individual makes it more personable and easy to understand.
C- Now as to how I connect with individuals, I do this in about 3 steps that vary. 1st, I make sure I am able to focus my mind. I do this through some breathing exercises that take a few seconds to a minute, and maybe a short meditation. In particular i keep my eyes closed and have a ritual of blowing onto my deck (idk why it just centers me) then I inhale with it against my nose, then blow out one more time with my head tilted up. I like to visualize sending out shimmering wind that travels to where it needs to be and sends me there. At this point, and let's use Seunghan for example, i will see the person I am connecting to.
They could be doing anything, walking down the street, in a cafe, at home, etc. In Seunghan's case he is usually walking around on the streets or at a public space sitting like at a cafe. Maybe I will call out to him or tap him on the shoulder. He looks up and I hold out my hand. Whether he takes it or not is the permission. That is if I can even get that far though.
I can be stopped at any point. Whether I am unable to visualize the air I blow out travelling, or unable to see the person I attempt to connect to, or maybe i try to force it thinking it's me and the person looks weird (has a weird smile, weird expression, or looks warped), or even if they simply don't acknowledge me at all. All of these are the permission indicators. How far I get insidcates how willing they are to share anything at all.
In the case of the last vibe check attempt, I was stifled from just the air blowing. I thought maybe I was not focusing, so I tried more after meditating, but rather than the normal enviornment I was met with a door to which I knocked on to request entry. Upon entering, I was met with some darkness and just weird expressions from Seunghan and one other member I could not place. But all were just standing around staring at me like an intruder. I could not see all their faces which means some did not want me to know what they were feeling at all. So I decided that was a no and I needed to go for now.
Now when it comes to visualizing like this, it is so much faster, more fleeting, and less detailed than what I am describing. It's the vagueness of a fleeting dream almost. Which is why meditating and being focused is important bc every small sensation is a factor that changes the enviornment.
When I do the Vibe checks for all members- I've mentioned before about how "so and so wanted to go first" lol and it IS kinda similar to tiny voices in my head but since it's energy it's just a vibe. I'll ask "who wants to go first" and in my head like a mantra it'll be like "Sohee Sohee Sohee Wonbin Wonbin SOHEE SOHEE Eunseok SOHEE" and some will back off and wait their turn and others will go back and forth for a while before I get annoyed 🥴. The event is similar to when you have a song stuck in your head. The ones that usually care the least about the order are Anton and Sungchan, also sometimes Shotaro. Eunseok likes to be first a lot and so does Wonbin. Sohee it just depends. I usually do Seunghan first regardless so he is never part of those fights lol.
Anyways a lot of this is basic intuition and rather than really detailed visions it is just feeling. You know like how you meet your friend's eyes and you immediately know what they are thinking or wanting to say? It is like that. As to how I came to know how to do that I have absolutley no clue- it is just something I eventually started doing naturally when doing readings and it has been very accurate ever since.
I hope this makes sense lolol i kinda went too in depth but I hope this helps for anyone interested in learning to read tarot in this method. You have to be a very empathetic person though and remember to use protection like sage or crystals bc some people's energy lingers on you and it's not always good at all....
Also be careful if you just connect to dieties bc not all of them are good. USE PROTECTION!!
Hope this was insightful! If anyone has further questions about this, feel free to leave a comment? I'll answer them.
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theunholyrogue · 2 years ago
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the guys find out you have a mask k!nk (21+ minors dni!) bayverse turts! x reader
i have not fallen off the face of the earth! i have just FINALLY found the time to write after my classes ended for summer and even though it’s not something i’d normally write, i think it’s… fitting. :) ~ + it’s not because i’m also obsessed with ghost and konig from cod haha what
⚠️: mature themes; minors dni, mentions of an obvious mask kink, sexual innuendos, the devils tango doesn’t happen here sorry guys :( #notactuallysorry, characters are all of adult age (18+)
💙Leonardo💙
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You and Leonardo had always been straightforward and open, from the moment the two of you became acquaintances, to best friends, to now partners. You both felt that communication was key— a key that was necessary to keeping your relationship alive and full of excitement as well as respect (along with the other vital roles!) So, when the time came that both of you were comfortable and ready to go all the way with one another, you both had a conversation about what you were both into, not cool with, possibilities, etcs, and that was that.
Except one thing.
You had been embarrassed to admit to a certain turn-on due to the fact that you didn’t think that Leo would understand.
Masks.
He wore one everyday, how he possibly understand?
The thought drove you insane until one night, when the two of you were getting freaky and Leonardo started to undo his mask, you boldly piped up.
“Leave the mask on.”
He stared at you, almost in bewilderment before his lips twitched into a smirk. He was onto you.
He didn’t question you on it right then— oh how dare he kill the mood! No, he waited until the two of you had gone four rounds and laid next to each other, panting.
You curled up into his side and he now draped his arm over you before opening his mouth.
“Again?”
“No.”
“Alright….”
Silence.
“A mask kink, huh?”
“Shut up!”
“All I’m saying is, I could’ve gotten so much more by leaving it on than by taking it off this entire time and you didn’t tell me!”
❤️Raphael❤️
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It was summertime and you had managed to be able to snag a couple of nights off to be able to spend some time with your lovely partner, Raphael.
You two had been dating roughly after the technodrome and Kraang paid a visit to NYC, and not much longer after that is when you two started going at it ya freaks. You were both secure in the relationship, both had a healthy intimate life with one another and with yourselves if times were tough.
You being you, you had an unhealthy habit of not clearing your search history after naughty content, and will tend to forget about it until you need to search something on your phone— which isn’t that common with Donnie around.
So, whilst in the midst of spending one of your summertime eves with Raphael in the confinement of your apartment, you get up to go to the bathroom while he is watching a TV show on the television in front of you two. Confused by what the show had just ended on, he thought he had grabbed his phone to search the show for answers and whenever he pulled the browser up, his gaze was met of that which contained mask kink galore.
Raphael set your phone down, the website still pulled up as you hummed your way back into the room and once your eyes met the screen and then his, all he did was smirk and pat his lap.
“You got some ‘splainin’ to do.”
💜Donatello💜
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You had always found it weird that you thought masks were such a sweet spot for you. You didn’t think that it could be considered a kink to like masks in the bedroom, or that the whole idea of kinks had just never been properly explained to you, so the conversations about them always made you feel awkward.
It took you a while to truly feel okay with just learning what you think you would like as far as kinks go, and once you found out that masks were a kink that others had, you felt a little less weird about the whole situation.
Not to mention that whenever you and Donnie started dating, you couldn’t help but imagine all the things he could do to you, simply because of the purple friggin mask on his face~. He never noticed how zoned out you would get around him until he had to draw you out of it.
Whenever he did find out was the time that the two of you finally decided to do the deed. He had felt like you wanted him to take his mask off, ironically, until you stopped him and asked him to keep it on. He didn’t think anything of it, but you overthought your request and had to explain it to him a few times that night that you felt like you were attracted to masks and needed a little bit a reassurance, which the turtle was very happy to give.
After finding that tidbit out, he was more than happy to surprise you every now and again with different masks to spice things up in the bedroom when he felt like his purple eye mask was getting too boring. (which it never was but-)
🧡Michelangelo🧡
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You were not subtle in letting Mikey know that you had a mask kink.
You didn’t even know you had a mask kink.
The mask kink let you know that it had you.
Anywho, let me tell you the story.
Mikey was bragging about getting his hands on the newest copy of COD: MWII and had been playing it ever since he had gotten it.
You had been laying behind him watching tiktok during the time that everybody and their mother’s were falling head over heels for Ghost, König, or both, and making edits of them.
You had fallen into this trap and of course with your partner playing the exact game… you made him restart so that you could see Ghost in ALL of his glory.
Mask and ALL.
You had never once paid so much attention to a mask before until this very moment and made it known to Mikey that you really liked Ghost’s mask, and then you turned to Mikey.
Low and behold, he’s wearing a mask.
And goddamn you are turned on.
“Mikey, turn the game off.”
“But! I just restarted!”
“I said turn it off!”
“Okay!!!”
Mikay could not have been any less prepared for that evening than he was.
Mikey’s sucks I’m sorry—
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