#not that hard and in anger obviously

[apricote]

i kissed my dog's forehead. she bit my nose in retaliation. that is love

[quietwingsinthesky]

Dean is such a paradox for me because on the one hand, I have been actively triggered by him in the show, there are moments where, intentionally or not, the writers managed to create a portrayal of manipulation and abuse and control issues that it sets off actual alarms for me. And on the other hand, I would not have him any other way. There is something — not comforting, that’s too soft a word — about knowing where Dean’s actions stem from, having seen and learned all that we do about his childhood neglect and parentification and the trauma he goes through repeatedly in the show, and that he doesn’t come out clean. He comes out a goddamn mess who ends up hurting the people around him in reaction to his own pain!

There’s a reality there that’s. Almost nice, actually. Distressing to watch, but it is a fucking mess, it’s a good mess! He’s got zero healthy coping skills and a healthy relationship with say, his brother, is terrifying because it leaves him open to abandonment!

I’m not sure I’m wording this correctly. There is a way to be a good abuse victim. Take the pain, martyr yourself on it, and then, even if you have no support or idea how to, then you have to become a Good Person who never hurts anyone the way you have been learning to your entire life. Simply toss everything that shaped you out the door and emerge a saint with a tragic backstory. And Dean is not that. And that’s so fucking good. Everything that he has gone through continues to effect the way he treats the people around him, and he can’t fight the behaviors he might recognize as harmful because he also sees them as protecting him (or protecting Sam by keeping Sam with him.)

And sometimes, idk. It feels good to see a guy who didn’t heal the “right way.” Who mostly didn’t heal at all, just keeps the wound open because it’s easier that way.

[sammygender]

trans headcanons of the winchesters are always extremely fun to play around with and i can see most of them. but one that always rings slightly false to me, despite a love for it due to self-identification and the fact it’s definitely interesting, is transmasculine dean. simply because if you’re going according to canon this would require him to have transitioned at some point prior to johns death, probably much prior, probably as a youngish kid. and i genuinely do not think that ever could’ve happened. he values johns approval too much and is too scared of demanding too much of him.

like even aside from whether john is Actually transphobic (i doubt he’s like Cartoonishly transphobic he probably would be annoyed by it slash not care much, interpret ‘not caring’ however you want) just the whole Thing of coming out where you’re like. “Hey dad im actually a human person who has an internal sense of self and such that doesn’t happen to be You 2.0 and am not the gender you thought i was and i feel emotions to such an extent that i actually like need to transition”…….

no fucking way dean would ever be able to do that to john while he’s still alive. please. teenage transmasculine dean would be like Well yeah sure i want to be a guy but that’s not an option for me whatsofuckingever. and crucially he’d be like that even if he knew entirely about trans people. now this is why transfemme dean works so well. because you just know it would take her at least thirty years to even consider it for a singular second.

on the other hand transmasc sam works so well because you can picture teenage transmasculine sam realising he’s a boy and promptly making it part of the whole entirely justified and very cool and fun teen angst rebellion FUCK YOU DAD thing. he could let spite carry him to the point of coming out. dean? he is burying that shit deep.

[bredforloyalty]

like i believe there can be a middle way, a golden mean, between tolerating "men are violent misogynists bc women aren't nice enough to them 🥺" and tolerating those users. i believe it's possible to just not give way to either

[buccellato]

Thinking about the train hostage arc in the first Trimax book....and I have some thoughts on some of the takeaways I've seen (in other places).........

I'm ngl it kinda bothers me when people read into the train hostage arc in trimax as "Vash is 100% in the wrong, just like his brother", because that was very much not the intended reading...it wasn't just supposed to be a "look how flawed Vash's ideology is in practice" moment (that's the hospital yuri arc ❤), it was supposed to be a "look how hard it is in this world for Vash to abide to his moral code, and yet he still does it despite the negatives" moment. He wasn't exactly happy with the end solution and wasn't exactly fighting super hard to stop the father from shooting the accused killer—he almost let him do it, even—but he wanted to ultimately stop the cycle of bloodshed and was willing to make himself look like a jackass doing so. The arc is a narrative set-up for the penultimate conflict of the series; it's not so much about the merits of righteous violence vs. pacifism but rather setting the stage for a showdown between vengeance vs. absolution.

Now, would I do the same if I were in Vash's thigh-high boots? No of course not, fuck that one dude in particular lmao. But I don't exactly think Vash is weaker or unprincipled for choosing the option he did, either.

[sonknuxadow]

stuck in an endless cycle of being annoyed about some of the stuff that was in the trailer and then i see how excited other people are and start thinking "well maybe some of the stuff that upset me could go in a different direction than im expecting. and there was still some cool stuff in there. maybe im overreacting or jumping to conclusions" and then i remember what exactly i was annoyed about and start thinking maybe i was right the first time and then i just kind of feel sad thinking about how excited i was over the first two movies compared to how ive been feeling about the more recent movieverse content and then i get frustrated with how it feels like im not allowed to express these feelings and opinions with how defensive some movie fans get and dismiss all criticism as needless hate regardless of who its coming from or what theyre saying and then i go Okay im normal now . until im reminded of the movie again

[sweetlullabyebye]

westerns that have lee van cleef in them (or lee van cleef in westerns)

A Few Dollars More (1965)

Day of Anger (1967)

Death Rides A Horse (1967)

Sabata (1969)

Return of Sabata (1971)

Take A Hard Ride (1975)

[miniagula]

i think i need to reread jj bc chapters 25-30 in season one are nuts...gayeon v ji being teased for the second time, ji fighting against the school using sending his students to black island ("Pampering them won't do them any good either. Don't forget why Gayeon Sin left NEST." is CRAZYYYY) to "build the school's forces" as quickly as possible, gayeon being able to get the drop on breeder (his fucking expression while she's threatening him is so funny) AND. THAT LITTLE SNIPPET OF THEIR FIGHT. HER SCAR THROBBING WHEN SHE RECALLS THE MEMORY OF JI CALLING HER A MONSTER. FWHNAJFNWJFNJWDNFJ

[mostofthingsmostofthetime]

The rescent riots in the UK are despicable (but sadly not surprising).

Yes, what happened to those little girls is a tradgey, but the person who was responsible wasn't an asylum seeker, and even if he was, that would NOT excuse the racism displayed these past few weeks.

The people taking part clearly don't care about the safety of children as they're, scaring other people's & indoctrinationating their own into perpetuating racist acts.

Seven years is a lot, though! Then don't fucking join a hate group.

But the non white people are being violent too! Yeah, well, that tends to happen when you attack people. I'm not going to hate on people for standing up for themselves.

They're taking our jobs! Why do you believe that those jobs are YOURS? Are you actually qualified & able to make a good impression on bosses, or do you think just being white should be enough.

They don't work! Well Asylum seekers litrually aren't allowed to until their case gose through but plenty of other POC have jobs (I know you've seen them though it must be hard to make them out through that fog of hatred) & I've met plenty of white people who don't want to (no hate to those who can't because of disability or mental health issues) or loose jobs because they're just overall terrible employees (some of the shit I've seen middle aged white people do at their jobs is crazy).

They're all criminals! Well, that's just not true now is it plus it's been proven multiple times that the biggest factor in crime is poverty, NOT race & again I've encountered plenty of white people who've broken the law yet most didn't seem to get more than a slap on the wrist (if that). Strange, that isn't it?

Well, "those kinds" of men hate women! Ahh, yes, because there's never been white rapists, woman killers, stalkers or harrasers. Its been proven that hating women is a problem in all races & and sadly, the biggest threat to us is usually our own partners or family, not some random aylsum seeker (who if they do hurt women tend to go after the ones from their own community).

They're not from here! Ok, so I don't know if anyone told you, but you can actually be born here without being white and you can't ban people from a country just because of the colour of their skin. Also, neither was half my family, yet we never get told to go back to our own country. Hmm, I wonder if our white skin could possibly have anything to do with that.

They can't speak English! A lot of them are multilingual, actually (& you make fun of their accents) & for the ones who can't well you seem to hate them getting anything (such as English lessons) for free. Also, how many Brits go abroad despite refusing to learn absolutely anything about other countries (there's a reason we're known as disrespectful, violent, sex obsessed, drunks by most of the world).

Also sooner or later we are going to have to accept that a lot of the issues that make immigrants flee their home countries are caused (or at least made worse) by ours & other Western governments.

This country definitely has problems, but we should be taking them up with politicians & their rich mates. Who are the ones actually hording wealth made from the exploitation of the poor, not random people of colour who are just trying to live their lives.

[to-the-batcomputer]

christ almighty. bruce wayne i don't forgive you for anything (<- girl who just watched utrh voice)

[luvsavos]

i deserve financial compensation for the amount of fucking hoops i had to jump through to enable tipping on here

[calamity-bean]

Carmy breaking down and freaking out and crying while trapped in the walk-in, shut out from the team and deprived of the opportunity to participate in launching the dream he's worked so hard for.... they're doing so good and they're doing so good WITHOUT HIM..... Really giving me parallels of Donna crying in the kitchen while everyone else sits around the dinner table bearing her feast..... ooughhhoughghghghghghghg 🥺

[termagax]

for all his misery and mopey nature i do think he likes and prefers being roadhog and wouldnt go back for anything. i think "feeling like mako" means feeling small and ashamed and weak in his mind and he hates it.

[puckpocketed]

hehe carlsson to the ducks sealed my fate he was my favorite of the top three bunched up there!!! and i was at bu concurrently with z so i confess a fondness for him as well 😭 ducklings i’m so sorry about this year fr. brighter days ahead…..

leo carlsson of bone explosion famwe… begging him to stay healthy BEGGING ALL DUCKS TO STAY HEALTHY. it has been such a rough season… i read an absurd fact recently that the ducks’ top 10 picks have played all of TWO games this season where none of them was hurt 😭 like no fucking wonder they suck they’ve barely played together LOL

i’m perilously weak to d-men and i think (marge potato in hand image) Pavel Mintyukov is very neat <3 whatever he’s got going on with Jackson LaCombe should be studied for science… d-pairs who are boybestfriends 🥹🤲

crossing my fingers that my california girls (ALL OF THEM!!! SHARKS + KINGS AS WELL) make it through these dark times…

[monty-glasses-roxy]

Horsies in the Plex if Roxy is a horse lover before she knows they've ever existed here is really good honestly. She's off exploring, finding random horse themed things and immediately drops what she's doing to run over to Vanessa with it like "LOOK WHAT I FOUND!!!" cause Vanessa also likes horsies and is the reason Roxy likes them so much in the first place.

Like it starts with a prop horseshoe or something. Then she's finding plushies and building a little collection of them, making sure to give Vanessa one every time she finds a new one. Then she finds a random ass saddle or a bunch of prop hay bales or something. A bridle. Some bit pieces. A harness for a wagon. The wagon itself. Horse action figures. Whatever else. She's been excited about every single thing she's found so far and wonders how much more there is to find...

Opens a new storage room door and she finds actual fucking horses. Deactivated, dusty as hell, animatronic horsies.

Fucking grabs Vanessa and takes off running into areas Vanessa is absolutely not allowed to be in at all to show her all the horsies sndjjd like "VANESSAA!!! THERE'S HORSES!!!! NESSA HORSES ARE REAL!!! THEY REALLY EXIST NESSA LOOOOK!!!!"

[psalmsofpsychosis]

okay but the worst kind of grief i experience is also a kind of grief i rarely share with anyone else because everytime i do i just get weird stares, but anyway; i absolutely have to put time aside to grieve the death of a potential, it gets to me more than an anything else, like, i eternally live in a world of potentials, i rarely think about things as they are, it's always about what they "could be/become". The worst kind of heartbreak is when they dont become anything. It kinda forces me to confront stuff as they are, and then i have to deal with the fact that i have so much fucking resentment towards things as they are now, and that experience is not something i have an easy time facing.