#not sure what all to put in a pinned post ngl

[voidoffline]

Oh hey look I have a pinned post now

Idk what all to put in a pinned post so bear with me

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Art I am very proud of:

Drawing of a Minecraft screenshot <-(my magnum opus)

Drawing of a colossal dragon

Slimecicle fanart I drew

Drawing of Scarland

Wildlife recap video (EPS 1-5)

(I’m proud of all my art, those are just some that I am especially proud of:] )

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Also I do commissions for animals/pets :] :] :] commissions are currently open

If you wanna know any more info on my commissions feel free to ask

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Vfvov Tag……… I have an au under the tags vfvov/v for vigilante or villain/vfvov au (an au where Mumbo Jumbo accidentally becomes a vigilante(/villain))

ZipPet au Tag……… A Kinitopet + Missclick duo au inspired by Charlie��s zip bomb song

My art Tag……… Just the tag for my art. My art or digital art both work

My ocs Tag……… My oc stuff. There’s not much, but I will gladly answer questions on my ocs and their universe if you ask. Variations of the oc tag will probably work as well for looking at my blog

A8y22 Tag……… A specific version of my main oc, basically a ‘what if they were a robot’. I have a lot of different versions of my main oc, this is the one that I currently post enough about to have his own tag EDIT: He’s now become his own separate entity and I love him very much

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-Other socials/blogs:

Voidoffline on AO3 (I haven’t yet talked about some of my fics there on here, but I do write and post some shit)

Gimmic blog where I draw Charlie slimecicle’s dnd character Troy Lougferd every day

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I don’t really have any dni, except that spams/scammers asking for donations are not welcome. Actually don’t ask me for donations period. I don’t have money and I’m just a minor, leave me alone please.

Any other questions about me or my art or aus? Feel free to go ahead and ask!

[cryptictongues]

To Kiss is to Hunger

pairing: Joshua Rosfield x Fem!Reader rating: Mature word count: 5.0K summary: You are terrified to kiss Joshua. Joshua has an idea to remedy that.

warnings: practice kissing, grinding, touching, intimacy, mutual pining, insecurities and self-doubt, just straight up romance

Author’s Notes: Ngl I know I said it would be a little frisky, but just so happens I made it just a little bit friskier because Joshua is just a touch starved man. Just a heads up, please read my pinned post before following me! Minors and ageless blogs will be blocked as this blog’s content is NSFW.

[AO3 link]

You couldn’t fathom why you are in the Shelves this late into the night. ‘It’s silly.” You think, walking around, trying to find anything to help you with your little dilemma. You tried to put your brain to rest, to calm its ravenous thoughts of anxiety, but the efforts were futile. And it is all because a teasing strawberry blond tried to kiss you.

You and the young Lord got quite close after his arrival to the Hideaway. You help out as a barmaid for Molly in the Ale House, and the first night of Joshua being out of the infirmary after the fall of Drake’s Tail had been all the talk. You would overhear conversations about how charming he was, how he was very knowledgeable about the lands of Valisthea, and how he is the brother of the leader of the Hideaway. He piqued your curiosity, as most newcomers do, but you didn’t think anything to come of it.

There was one night, however, where service wasn’t off its rig, and you had decided to take that time to practice your reading. Reading and writing are forbidden practices for Branded, and you were only able to learn reading due to old, scribbled writings thrown into the trash bins. You would rummage through for every written scrap in the dead of night and return it before your enslavers came to. To you, it was a piece to the puzzle of your freedom. But only a piece. 

You were reading an old children’s fairytale: a prince in search of the long-lost princess who searched day and night to find her. You were immersed, so much so you hadn’t noticed the presence in front of you, seemingly still but present all the same. 

“Ah, I read that story many times as a child. A true classic.”

Your head had snapped so far back you thought you would’ve fallen backwards. Your eyes jumped until they landed on the man before you, and you remember how wonderstruck you felt. He was the most beautiful man you had ever seen, and the way he was looking at you had your stomach producing butterflies. You felt a sense of embarrassment, however, as the book you were reading was adapted for children. You knew those born with a silver spoon were highly educated, so to have someone as handsome and surely intelligent as he watching you read made you nervous to be a laughing stock. 

“Yeah, but it’s more of a watered down version of it. I’m sure I’ll get to read the original someday.” You had awkwardly explained, waiting for him to make a joke of your lack of ability to read at a level that matched your maturity. That joke, however, never came. He stayed and asked you questions, such as who your favorite character was, what your favorite part of the story was, and so on. That conversation led beyond the book, and it is a fond memory of the golden boy.

It wasn’t long after that he offered to tutor you and made an extraordinary effort to give you books about topics you liked. Hell, he would even bring books back from long expeditions that him, Clive, and Jill would go on. “I found this story about sea fairies that I thought you would like.” “I saw a merchant selling a copy of this book I think you’ll enjoy.” “This book made me think of you.”

After many nights and days passing, it had become apparent that your heart had let him in, and you were relieved to know that his heart blazed for you also. However, unlike you, he is very evident about how he shows his feelings for you. He initiated the first hand holding, the first embrace, every tender moment you both have shared has been started by him. It makes you nervous, he makes you nervous, but in a conflicting way because you want everything he has to offer, yet your life of being treated less than for so long has put in the fear of not being enough. You fear you will misstep, embarrass yourself, he will realize he can have someone better, and let you down gently. He is a gentleman, after all.

All of the insecurities and doubts you hold have led you to the shelves due to this past evening's events.

-

A gathering of many members of the Hideaway was taking place, enjoying each other’s company, exchanging stories from the road, and eating and drinking so good that spirits were at an all time high. About halfway through the evening, Joshua and Clive had returned from their mission that had kept them away for well over a week, and joined everyone in the festivities. You could feel Joshua’s eyes on you constantly as you worked, soft gazes in your direction as you brought over more ale. You hadn’t seen each other since he had left, and you could see from the look in his eyes that he wanted you close, longing for your time. 

And you weren’t the only one to sense it.

“Go on.” You heard Molly speak as you polished the cups.

“Hmmm?” You turned to see her smirking at you, nudging her head in the direction of the young Rosfield. 

“You are free of your duties. You spend some time with everyone, especially you know who.” 

You shook your head, your cheeks flushed. “I appreciate it, but Molly there is a lot to clean up. I can’t ask you to do this all by yourself.”

“Nonsense.” She scoffed, walking to you, taking the scrub and cup out of your hands, only to set them aside to grab your own. “We all deserve a little down time. Please, I insist.”

You hesitated, and her eyes softened. “In these troubling times, every moment counts; for anything can happen at any time. We must be selfish with our time.” 

That alone had set you into motion. You had walked over to sit beside him, hip to hip, his arm draped around your side with his head leaning slightly against your own as Clive shared his and his brother’s adventures. 

You could tell Joshua was more touchy than normal, not that you minded. You would feel him squeeze you from time to time. If you shifted slightly, he would adjust so you were still close to him. You would feel him turn his head to bury his face into your hair, gentle caresses of his lips against your scalp. No words were spoken between the two of you, just enjoying the night together with everyone. But even nights like these had to end. 

You called it a night, telling everyone that you were going to head to the bed chambers, but not before Joshua insisted on walking you there. The two of you had bid goodnight to the others, and with your hand in Joshua’s grasp, the two of you walked to the bed chambers, small talk between the two of you as you both headed there slowly.  

“I can’t believe you let Clive do that.” You giggled, Joshua’s story about his older brother shoving a carrot into his mouth to make him sick. 

“He had reason, for we were in an unfortunate situation. We needed a reason to slip away.” Joshua grimaced, vaguely remembering the taste of the raw carrot. “Besides, I have always had a soft spot for my brother. I’d do anything for him.”

“I know having him back in your life has been a gift.” You smiled, waving his arm back and forth as you both approached the bed chambers. He pulled your arm back gently, causing you to turn into his arms. The way he was looking at you left you speechless; a thousand words being spoken through one look. 

“Why yes, it has truly been a gift by the Founder to be reunited with my brother.” He brings your hand up to his chest, right above his heart; the thumping gingerly warming up your palm. “It has also been a gift to have the honor of being allowed your time, my lady.”

You shook your head, but before you could’ve said anything, Joshua had spoken once more. “On the topic of gifts, I have something for you.” 

He slipped his free hand into the large pouch of his belt and pulled out what you can see is a book. He placed the book in both of your hands, grazing them before allowing you to inspect it. You recognized the artistry of the book: hardbound leather, intricate gold lining, and a sturdy weight in your hand. You looked at the title and you found yourself releasing a shaky breath. 

“I thought you said there were no more copies.” You whispered, in disbelief as to what you were seeing. Enchanting thy Fair Maiden. It was a copy of a book Joshua has praised over. He would recite lines to you from what he memorized as a child, and you would ask him to retell them to you over and over again, never tiring from hearing his smooth voice telling you a tale.

“It took some bartering, but it was worth it if it means I could grant you a copy.” 

Snapping from your mind, you looked to him, shaking your head in disbelief. “Joshua, I can’t accept this. This is one of your favorite stories. You should keep it.” 

You tried pushing the book back into Joshua’s, but not before him grasping both of your hands and gently pushing it back into your vicinity. “My lady.” He begged. “I can reassure you that nothing would please me more than you accepting this gift.”

You stayed silent for a moment, a brief pause in the timeline aside from you and him, before smiling shyly, looking away from him in a flush. “I will cherish this for all days, Joshua. Maybe you can read it to me properly sometime.”

“Anything for you, dearest.” 

Your gaze stayed down, not knowing how to bid farewell for the night, before you felt Joshua’s hand lightly touch your cheek, lifting your face for him to look upon. You sensed a certain hesitancy, his eyes seeking for something on your face before landing back on your own. 

“May I try something?” 

Everything started to go slow and fast at the same time, your mind racing and hyper focusing on every detail. You focused on how much closer Joshua had gotten to you, how his body heat had your body melting tenfold, how his face leaned down to yours, his hand stroking your cheek. You realized what he was asking to do: he was asking to kiss you.

Sudden flashes of self-doubt came crashing down onto you, Joshua’s hand on your branded cheek making you feel self-conscious. What is he doing? How can he want to kiss me? Oh, Greagor be with me, I have never kissed anyone. I am going to make a fool of myself!

Out of reflex and fear, you stepped back and away from Joshua’s reach. He looked startled, not expecting your reaction, and all you could do was stare at him as you calmed your heart down. You felt embarrassment shudder down your spine, but you knew that it would have been worse if you had attempted to kiss him. 

You tried to shrug it off, chuckling awkwardly as if that would erase the last few seconds of shame you felt. “It is late. I’m afraid I must turn in. Goodnight, Joshua.” 

You flung the chamber door open and closed it just as fast without a glance in Joshua’s direction, your back hitting the wood as you worked your anxieties down.

Now you’ve really done it stupid stupid STUPID!

-

So here you are, looking for a kissing manual that doesn’t exist.

“I can’t believe it has come to this.” You moan, shaking your head at how pathetic you currently feel. You want to kiss him; of course you want to kiss him! But the thought of kissing him and making a complete fool out of yourself has strung itself high in your head. You will do anything to ease your anxieties, and if finding literature that will help you is the way, then so be it. 

You keep searching the shelves, and finally you see something that catches your attention. You see a book with a deep red spine, and immediately you become curious. Red means romance which maybe means kissing, right? you think and go to reach for it, your tippy toes giving you an extra inch that helps you grab the old spine of the book. Once the book is grasped, you give it a once over and what you see is nothing at all. The book has no title, no author, no nothing. Just hardbound leather that looks as if it had been dyed with blood. 

You move to sit at a table, the kissing debacle hiding in the back of your skull as a new curiosity peeks. You stare at the book intently, like it was going to open up for you to tell you all of its secrets. A book with no visible identity, no mark.

The curiosity killed the cat as you finally flipped it open, the crackle of the pages singing, showing its age. The first few pages are barren with no offering until you reach the first official page. You read, smiling because you can read everything on the page in comprehension, but also because it’s a love poem. You never have had the chance to read poetry thus far, so this was a treat for you. Just the thing I need to ease my mind.

You continue reading the poems, most being about love, companionship, and things in the realm of romance. As you read them, you picture Joshua and yourself, like the two of you were living in the reality of this book full of lovely prose. In a way, it makes you recognize that maybe what Joshua sees in you is what you are imagining right now: a lover, a partner for life. You feel a sense of confidence swell in you, so you read on, addicted to the words written out.

Until you get to the next page.

What you read next halts your breathing, slowing it down to stop fire from growing in your chest. This poem is about the same things previously stated, love, romance, companionship, but in a much more intimate form. The words strung together formed the most erotic sentences, words of longing for the senses. They make you blush hotly; they make you antsy in your chair while locked in, but most especially they make your mind run wild with fantasies of you and him. 

Oh, you and him.

You mind wanders as you read, zoning out into a reality where you exude the confidence to give into Joshua’s desires and more. The words dig into your skin, warming you up that your thin nightgown felt like plenty of layers on this cool night. You are so immersed that you don’t hear the large doors open, and the calling of your name feels like a figment of your imagination. It’s not until you feel the warmth on your shoulders that you are brought back, feeling like a bucket of cold water has been dropped over your head from the cold sweat.

You slam the book shut, turning so quickly that the room starts to spin before the warmth on your shoulders grows firm, steadying you in your seat. You look to see Joshua staring at you, worry showing on his face seemingly from your reaction. “I deeply apologize, my lady. I didn’t mean to frighten you.”

You breathe a chuckle, seeing him here at a time like this would be your luck. You cross your arms, becoming extremely aware of your lack of clothing under his gaze. “What are you doing here?”

“I could ask the same of you.” He retorts and pulls out a chair to sit facing you. “Truthfully, I couldn’t sleep much. I came here to see if doing more research would tire me, but it seems fate has chosen a more direct route to my restlessness.”

You see why he can’t sleep, and sigh because this is from your doing. “Joshua, you have nothing to fret over. You did nothing wrong.”

“But I’m afraid you are wrong, my lady. I shouldn’t have been so forward, and to know I put you in an uncomfortable position upsets me greatly. I would never dream of making you uneasy, and for my mishaps I must apologize to you. I cannot bear the thought of you keeping your distance because of my foolishness.” 

You watch him as he apologizes for his directness, which internally makes you laugh because that isn’t the issue. You love his directness, just as he is being direct with you right now. It’s you. It’s your cowardice for wanting something more and not having the courage to pursue because of the what ifs, the buts, the howevers. It’s your fear of rejection because of your lived experiences. It’s you, not him. 

“Joshua.” You state, moving to grab his hands within your own. “You did nothing wrong.”

“My lady, please I-” 

“Shhh,” you hush. “Let me speak.”

“You have nothing to be sorry for, and I apologize for making you feel you need to.” You exhale, preparing to open yourself up for display. “It’s all me. I’m inexperienced, and I’ve been viewed as nothing for so long that I’m fearful that one misstep will set you away; that you can have someone who knows what they are doing and have the confidence to show for it.”

“Is that really what this is about?” Joshua asks.

You nod, looking down at the two of your intertwined hands. You see Joshua’s hands pull away from yours and your breath shakes. This is it. He is going to leave. That’s until you feel the heat that only the Phoenix could exude on your cheeks, your head being brought up to see him smiling. “My dearest,” Joshua whispers, as if talking any louder would damn him. “You are my everything, for you have captured me: mind, body, and soul. Also, your inexperience mirrors mine, I can assure you.”

Your eyes widen. “There is no way that can be true. You are a Lord.”

He’s laughing now, shaking his head as his hands go back to you, grasping them with care. “I was only a child then. Besides, the Undying were very protective of me under their care. There was no time nor place for such things. Even then, the only person that was always allowed in my vicinity was Jote, and we have never viewed each other romantically.”

“So, there really has been no one?” You whisper, your mind stuck between disbelief and credence.

“No. Not until now.” He squeezes your hands. “My heart belongs to you, and you alone. There is no one else I’d rather give myself to.”

You shiver, the idea of experiencing forms of intimacy together for the first time spreads a raging fire in your stomach. “You sure have a way with words, Joshua Rosfield.”

“You can thank all of the romance novels I read in my youth.” He chuckles. “Speaking of books, what were you reading?”

“What?” You ask, forgetting about the erotica sitting inches away from you. 

“The book you were reading. I don’t believe I have read that one yet. May I take a look?” 

You are panicking, knowing the contents of the book and who is asking to take a peek. You go to grab it, reacting as fast as you could, but alas you reacted too late. Joshua now has the book, opening the page you had left off on, and starts to read. You see his eyes go wide, his pupils dilating, his fingers fidgeting against the page he is holding. You freak out, going to reach for the book before he reads further. “Okay Joshua, that’s enough.” A smile creeps up slowly on his face, humming as he moves to stand up before your fingertips touch the book, backing away slowly as he continues. You stand up, walking up to him to get that god forsaken book away from him. 

“Oh Joshua, please give me back the book!” You panic. 

“By the Founder, what possessed you to read this smut?” Joshua smirks, seamlessly avoiding your grabby hands as he reads the pages. “Especially in the middle of the night?”

He wasn’t meant to see this! He wasn’t meant to see you reading the abhorrent words you were consuming. He wasn’t meant to see you like this in your flimsy gown. Damn me! Why did I not cover up more?!

“To taste the lips is to be fulfilled, for the instinct of man is to claim, conquer, and revel in the midst of her flesh. To kiss is to hunger, to feast among the softest of petals that call to him, beckoning for his return to get both of their fills.”

You are internally screaming now. You can’t believe he is tormenting you like this. You are still reaching for the book, desperate for this nightmare to end, before you hear an “oomph” as Joshua’s back collides into one of the shelves. You snatch the book from him, running back to put it back where it came from. “Okay, enough please!”

“Forgive me.” Joshua says, although it is said with a devilish grin. “I just didn’t know you had such… exquisite taste.”

“I didn’t even know what was in the book when I pulled it.” You say defensively, hands waving manically in front of you like they would make you more convincing. “I was just trying to find something that would help give me the courage.”

As if that isn’t as embarrassing, or even more so.

“What if we do something that helps us both gain courage? A practice session if you will.” Joshua says from the other side of the room, keeping his distance to see what tone you will take.

“What do you have in mind?” You draw out nervously, twiddling your thumbs in anticipation.

Joshua walks back over to where you both had sat, moving the chair so it was facing you before sitting down. He rubs his thighs a little as if he needed to warm them up, before patting his lap. “Come take a seat.”

Instinct has you taking a step forward before a hitch finds itself in your feet, stopping them all together. 

“Do you trust me?” He asks sincerely.

“Of course, I do.” You quickly blurt out, as if answering a second later would draw doubt. 

He smiles, his hand reaching out to invite you over. “Then please, my dearest, come to me.”

You take a deep breath and walk over till you stand before him. You grasp his hand, tingles running up your arm as he pulls you to him and guides you onto his lap. Your hands move to steady yourself on his shoulders, while he places his hands on your lower back to support you. Your legs dangle on either side of the chair, your gown riding up your thighs which you are all too aware of. However, you note that Joshua is only looking at you, gauging to see where your head is. “Is this okay, my lady?”

“Mhmm.” You hum, trying to calm your rapid heart. This is so intimate, too intimate, but you want it. You want him. You want to create every kind of intimacy with him, and this is a start. You knew that it is time to take that leap, especially since he will take that leap with you. 

“Joshua,” you murmur, eyes still on his. “Will you kiss me?”

“As you wish, my love.” 

You close your eyes, leaning in slightly to show that you aren’t backing out. You feel one of Joshua’s hands move to your left cheek, your branded cheek, tracing it with his thumb gently. Soon you feel him move forward, his forehead sitting against yours, his breath hitting your lips in puffs. The anticipation was killing you, your hands squeezing his shoulders to urge him on, and before you know it his lips are against your own. The kiss is light, a sweet peck before pulling away slightly, only to go back to give one more. You both are testing the waters, giving into each other slowly until the two of you start to grow peckish.

The kiss is gradual, pecks graduating to long lip locks and more movement. Your hands have found homage in Joshua’s hair, gripping not too hard but enough to show him how much you are enjoying him. His hands found their way to the crease of your hips, gripping the flesh to keep you in place. You can feel yourself growing restless, needing more of him within your senses. 

It’s like he can read your mind as his hands bring your body closer. A gasp leaves your lips as his groin settles against your heat, leaving your head spinning. His kisses become feverish, his hands roaming up and down your thighs, your nightgown receding higher in the process. You sense satiability is nowhere in sight, the movements of his body proving to you that the absence of intimate touch has turned him into a depraved man. Because even though Joshua Rosfield is a gentleman with a heart of selflessness, he is still a man with selfish desires and needs.

Your hands go back to grip at his shoulders, trying to calm yourself from his ministrations. A wetness hits your lips, and your mouth opens willingly, needing to taste him further. Your tongues melt together, creating a unique taste between the two of you that’s so addicting you don’t know how either of you will stop. You lean more into him, your hands going back to his hair to control his movements, causing him to groan in the most sinful way. You pull away, giggling knowing you got him to make such pretty sounds. The confidence from it goes straight to your head, going right back in for his lips to have him make more delicious sounds. 

A deep feral groan is released from Joshua’s throat, causing him to pull away in heavy breaths. He looks at you with hazy eyes, smiling deliriously. “You will be the death of me, my love.”

Your hands are now trailing from his hair to his chest, your hands running up and down the fabric of his tunic, feeling the toned body beneath it all. Your head leans back against his forehead, both of your breaths heavy on each other’s lips. “Then shall death keep us together, never parted.”

Joshua leans up back to your lips, kissing you hungrily, your declaration causing him to hunger for more. You still had the high ground, you being on top giving you more opportunity to take the lead. You knew this could be too soon, a little risky, but your sureness that Joshua feels the same hunger as you do is enough to convince you. You start to grind down slowly on top of him, your undergarments and his matching tunic pants the only barriers. 

“Fuck,” Joshua draws out breathless, his arms coming up to wrap around you to ground himself. 

“Does that feel good, my Lord?” You smile, feeling over the moon that you are making him act this way. 

“You have no idea.” Joshua gasps. “You have turned me into a new man.”

You giggle as you continue your movements. “Is that so?”

“By the Founder, yes!” He groans loudly at a particular movement of your hips. “How about I show you.”

Suddenly you are being lifted up, your butt settled onto a hard surface, legs spread apart by Joshua’s hips, and warm lips ravishing your own. Your nightgown is definitely way past your legs now, bunched up at your hips with Joshua’s hands right under the fabric. This new side of Joshua has you addicted, the push and pull the both of you are playing at exciting you more. You release his lips and lean up to his neck, nipping at the skin at the juncture of his neck and jaw. His breath hitches, leaning into you as you nip and kiss his neck. It’s as if he is hypnotized by your love bites, casting a spell on him. Your legs wrap around his waist, pulling him closer to you, but in an instant everything stops.

You open your eyes to see Joshua breathing hard, his hands gripping the table. Your hands go to his face, worry etching into your brain. “Darling, did I do something wrong?”

Joshua laughs, his eyes opening to look right back at you. “Absolutely not.” His hands go to yours on his face, holding onto each one as he brings them down. “I just don’t want to accomplish everything in one night, especially here in the Shelves.”

He pulls you up to your feet, your hands still in his as he looks at you with the brightest smile on his face. “I want to have time to savor you when the time is right.”

Even after all of that, he is still ever the gentleman. 

“I agree. I’m sorry if I went too far.” You chuckle, a tinge of embarrassment in your tone. 

Joshua embraces you, his head tucked into your neck. “You have nothing to apologize for. I hope you don’t think I had ulterior motives.”

“Never,” you say quickly, squeezing him to you.

“We should head back to our respective beds before people notice we’ve disappeared.” Joshua hums.

You hum in agreement and pull back, so you are now under Joshua’s arm. Both of you head out the doors of the Shelves into the cool night air. You shiver, and Joshua brings you in closer to shield you from the cold. He walks you back to the bed chambers, and before he departs, he places a light kiss on your lips, causing your eyes to flutter close at the bliss you feel in the moment. 

“Goodnight, my dearest. I shall see you in the morning.” Joshua says after he pulls away.

“Goodnight, Joshua. But before you go, may I request something?” 

“Anything for you, my dearest.” 

“Can we practice some more later? You are my tutor after all.” And my lover, my partner for life.

Joshua beams at you. “I would love nothing more.”

[redrandomposts]

Hello! thabk you for writing out tills perspective it was very good! And sad :( what does Till think once he finds Ivan gone? Does he know that Ivan is dead or does he think he’s just gone

and if he gets that Ivan won’t come back how does he mourn? I think it could be cool if till got into sculpting to make a statue of Ivan)

Also , I was wondering what if sua gave Ivan a little more time like 3 months or 3 years to get till to love him/kiss him so we could have more time of them loving eachother secretly. I specifically think Till keeping Ivan in the fancy rooms for longer is fun, because till can try out all the things he says he wants to do just long enough to miss them when Ivan is gone

I personally imagine till braiding and brushing Ivan’s hair quietly (because I love the mental visuals of Ivan with longer hair) and putting 1 thousand little sliver clips in his hair as one thing I find really interesting! Or maybe till collecting beautiful clothes to dress Ivan in and having enough time for Ivan to try them on but not enough time for him to receive them tailored (and I was also thinking maybe till considers proposing to him, or at least asking him to be a concubine if that’s not allowed but he doesn’t get the chance to give the ring- just enough time to have one made)

I am not sure if I make sense, I do not write very well but I hope u like this

-🍎

yeah u make sense 🍎!! dw, i have to sort through my thoughts and get it into a tumblr post... and this is mainly what the baseline looks like.

guys i can't believe i did a bad ending ngl i think i'm un-canonizing the bad end for a happy one and the bad end can stay a thought unreleased to the world.

i was thinking of having ivan be there for a month, but that's a kind of long time not to sort through feelings... so a week it was. ivan was practically bed-ridden and spent a lot of time asleep, so till would sneak in and brush and braid his hair and decorate him up. and, well, a lifetime of yearning for something, getting a taste of it, and then forever losing it...guys i'm sick why did i do that?!

happy ending time or i'm beating past me up (im making them eighteen its kinda weird otherwise)

===

the gentle feeling of his hair shifting along like waves in the ocean woke him up. the moon peaked in through the window, spilling its light across the room. the mirror reflected ivan, who was sitting and leaning on another.

the haziness of the entire situation felt like a dream; calming, slow. ivan's eyes were barely cracked open, irises focused on the mirror and the picture it reflected. his head was tilted onto a shoulder, legs saddling another's to make sure he doesn't slip from the very comfortable position he's in.

the brush glides through his hair, gently tugging on his scalp. ivan leaned in the slightest bit. it felt good. compared to his eyes, his lungs, his feet; this person was like a safe haven, a warm spring bath.

he watched as his hair was carefully divided and braided into a relaxed hair style, not pulled too much this way or that. as the end of it was tied with a silk tie, the other hand reached into a box. ivan didn't see it clearly, but if he did, he'd recognize several silver pins with details impossible to get underwater, each a different design.

throughout his midnight hair, stars were scattered across it.

the sound of pen scratching parchment lulled him back to sleep, forgetting the brief moment of awareness.

another painting hung in till's studio, depicting two characters. one, asleep, was in front and the clear subject; the second was behind, carefully pinning the last hairclip in place, recreating the galaxy.

till's pearl was his muse; from paintings to songs, it seemed as if creativity itself sprouted from ivan.

briefly, till fantasized a life where he and ivan would marry. in a month from now, they'd be engaged, and follow a two-year courting period until they're both twenty, and get married.

the entire empire knew he was courting someone at this point. he isn't sure what gave it away; was it the mass amount of jewelry and clothing and paints he commissioned? perhaps someone saw him carry ivan home? or did a servant gossip about it?

till paused, looking at the painting. he had a new idea, and all he had to do was wait for night to come and ivan to sleep.

flowers were delivered to the palace, where till arranged them around ivan's sleeping form. he let his hair fall naturally, but changed the clothing to be looser, as if ivan were floating on the water's surface. the moon carefully shone on ivan's face, giving a feeling of tragic beauty; as if ivan were a corpse on the water, surrounded by the flowers of loved ones.

...till readjusted the scene to make ivan seem immortal.

and, when he stepped back to paint it, he left a light kiss on ivan's forehead.

one night, ivan woke up during a scene. fully awake with conscious thoughts; it had to happen sooner or later.

this one... was a more dubious one that'd be stored under till's bed. his shirt was rucked up, pillow under his neck and shoulder blades to let his head fall back, hair splaying out. his pants were pulled down just a bit to show his hip bone, and the moonlight fell across him to paint a lascivious portrait. till had left marks of himself too; a cloth that lay across ivan's eyes with till's name stitched onto it, jewelry that till had commissioned himself.

ivan was briefly confused by the darkness, before realizing a cloth was gently laid over his eyes. confused, he took it off, stilling at the sight of till painting him.

"what are you..." he couldn't finish his sentence. his mouth had gone dry. the easel was positioned so that he could just barely see the painting, but the glimpse was enough.

there was an obvious artistic choice in it; in the way that ivan's pearl skin was pink, mouth slightly open.

the night ended with a kiss and a kiss and a kiss.

ivan discovered, the morning after, that the knives had completely left. his lungs stopped drowning in unseeable water, and his eyes no longer burned at the slightest disturbance.

till had paraded his fiancé, who wore a veil to shield themself from the world. it was improper to gaze upon them until they wed, after all.

===

slowly edging to being able to write smut... then no one is safe. this is a mess and ooc, but also, i need to get peace of mind on this au

[setaripendragon]

Okay, now I'm kinda interested in what the Kingsman "The King's Whores" wip is about...

=D I am so glad you asked!

Basically, it's a post!Secret Service (not Golden Circle or King's Man compliant) fic where Harry gets found alive and comes back to take the position of Arthur, and the first thing he has to do is replace a bunch of agents who died because of the four minutes of murder.

Eggsy decides that his own appointment wasn't scandalous enough, and not only does Kingsman have a classism problem, it also has a sexism problem, and goes trawling the east end's street hookers for his candidates for the trials.

The story is told from the PoV of a street hooker called Emma who is Massively Confused about this rich-ass chav who's paying her and a bunch of other girls a lot of money for the privilege of... taking them to dinner at the Ritz?

The plan is to have Eggsy run a couple of 'tests' to check for general comatibility (the ritz), physical ability (free running? laser tag? adult-sized jungle gym? I haven't decided yet), and some sort of puzzle-solving/detectiving skills (city wide treasure hunt? some sort of pin the tail on the asshole rich guy??? still a bit vague on this one, ngl) and Emma eventually gets bonus points for pretty much figuring out what Eggsy's looking for and possibly catching him bugging them all and such.

And the grand finale is going to be Eggsy presenting these three to Merlin as his candidates, and ALL of the other agents and candidates pulling faces as the girls fly through the Kingsman tests in a little epilogue montage and, like, two out of three of them getting the job or something.

(Harry thinks it's delightful, and fist-bumps Eggsy when Emma's knighted, much to the agony of all the other stuffed-up inbred aristocrats in Kingsman)

Have an excerpt:

“If you want us to get in your car, you’re gonna have to tell us where the hell you’re taking us.” Emma informed him with a grimace. So far, he’d been remarkably polite and respectful, but she knew full well just how quickly that could change once a bloke didn’t need to be. And sure, there were more of them than there were of him, but she couldn’t guarantee on it staying that way.

Eggsy thought about it for a moment, then nodded in a ‘that’s fair’ sort of way. “Dinner at at the Ritz.” He informed them blandly, and then grinned with mischief.

“Bullshit.” Emma snapped.

Eggsy sobered up at that, but he didn’t look angry to be called out, or even irritated. He just looked sombre. “I give you my word, that’s all. Dinner, two hours, and I’ll drop you all back here in exactly the same condition you’re in now, only better fed, and maybe a little bit tipsy. They got good wine there.” He put his hands up in a gesture of surrender. “And you don’t have to come. The money’s yours whether you do or don’t, but hey, when else’re you gonna get to make all the waiters at the Ritz uncomfortable as hell?”

That was tempting, Emma had to admit, but she also had her kids to think about, and if she got abducted, who the hell would look after them? “Your word?” Laura challenged, unimpressed.

“A true gentleman never breaks his word.” Eggsy replied sincerely, and it was an odd thing to hear in such a common accent, but Emma was pretty good at reading people, and she was pretty damn sure he meant it.

[nyxronomicon]

Hiya @///@

Can I get uhhh weed please, Gelato

Halsin, Ogata, inkarmat, laezel

part of my 420 event

ngl this blunt rotation would be incredible lmao

Ogata x GN!reader, Inkarmat x GN!reader (separately)

OGATA??? bro either needs weed to survive or cannot ever touch it ever there's no in between. anyway i love your brain for this lmao... but also Inkarmat would be awesome to smoke weed with ugh i love her. excellent taste lol

p.s. I have a few other bg3 requests so i'm gonna compile them all together in another post 💚

🔞 mature content. MINORS DNI. 🔞

cw: kissing, dub-con (all characters are high), drugs (weed)

Ogata looked at his calloused hands, wiggling his fingers to test his reflexes. Of course, the motion didn't really mean anything, especially with you giggling at the sight in front of you.

"I think I'm faster than usual." He grinned. "Look." His attention was on you now, wiggling his fingers so you could see.

"You're just..." You tried to stifle a laugh, but were unsuccessful. He pouted at your reaction. "That's not your reflexes."

"Well what is then?" He frowned. "I swear I'm a new man right now."

"Dunno," you shrugged, mind too hazy to explain why wiggling your fingers has nothing to do with your reflexes.

Ogata became lost in thought for a few minutes as you both watched the fire pit in front of you. It was warm. You felt good, the weed giving you the perfect buzz in the brisk night air, though the fire was dying down a little.

"Should we-" Your words were interrupted by a sudden shuffle from your companion.

In one smooth motion, Ogata had you pinned on the ground beneath him, a flush on his cheeks as he looked into your eyes. "See?" His breath hitched a little, clearly his mind caught up with his actions a little too late. "Uh, my reflexes..." He trailed off.

"I'm... not sure that counts," you giggled. Your thoughts were taking a minute to catch up too, though you knew with certainty that you wanted him to stay this close.

"I am." He suddenly kissed you, once again catching you by surprise. His warmth was welcome with the dying fire, and you gripped the lapel of his jacket to keep him close as the the two of you kissed into the night.

You and Inkarmat giggled at the fox jaw fell from her head to the ground. "Another success." She had a playful lilt to her voice. "You must be lucky." The two of you had been asking silly meaningless questions for a while now as the weed kicked in.

"The universe just wants what's best for me." You wore a smug grin as the world around you blurred.

"I have a question." Inkarmat put the jaw on her head again. "My secret, though." She winked.

You pouted, wondering what the question was as she tilted her head and the jaw fell to the ground once more. It landed on what you recognized as success and she giggled.

"What'd you ask?" You couldn't wait to hear.

Instead of an answer, she curled her finger to beckon you closer. You leaned in, eyes wide with a grin. She smelled incredible, the faint scent of incense and firewood clinging to her clothes. He smile was gorgeous, your eyes lingering on the shine of her lips as she closed the distance.

You weren't expecting a kiss. Not that it was unwelcome. In fact, you couldn't deny how incredibly perfect it felt as her hands skated up your arms, pulling you closer by the back of your neck as she deepened the kiss.

You moaned, a little embarrassed she had such an effect on you. She started to giggle again, pulling away but staying close enough that you could feel her breath on your skin.

"Not a question. Just a bit of courage." She winked, tugging you in for another kiss. She wasn't even close to being done with you yet.

[beastabyss666]

You know as a former member of Vivziepop's cult and yes its a cult not a fandom anymore I am disgusted by a majority of the people in it.

Like someone on the subreddit brought up it being kinda tasteless or fucked that they sold sexy Stella merch in bdsm gear when she's abused Stolas physically. The post was deleted quickly and judging by my experiences in the fandom people were stanning Viv or harassing OP and that has got me thinking.

Why is Stella in bdsm gear? Like Stolas and Blitzo are canonically into it yet you give the abuser that...

Like isn't a bit fucked that instead of choosing the canonical practicioners in your show you choose to put someone who uses pain not to pleasure but to slowly break and hurt someone.

We know Vivziepop has a merch rep so how did that get into production?

I also find it fucked that Vivziepop and crew are attempting to tackle an issue as serious as domestic abuse and do it so poorly by writing Stolas and Stella as bickering children next we see them. Then the staff has the utter gawl to sell merch in general of Stella and the fans buying it up.

Like I understand autograph signings slightly but that's the only merch Stella should have.

Vivziepop's cult loves to claim that they utterly depise Stella and deserves to suffer because she's an abuser so how dare people want nuance or not just a generically evil cartoon villain but the moment she is drawn in a sexy way they start throwing money at that.

Like I just want to know how these people if their friends ask about the character on the pin will explain "Oh this is Stella who's a sexy domestic abuser"

Then again am I surprised when Vivziepop makes merch of a rapist and most of the crew have some weird fascination with Valentino and not in the way that he's their best written villain way more like they are simping over him.

I think a lot of fandoms, especially nowadays, have a lot of genuinely bad people who really need help/therapy but see nothing wrong in what they do or just keep doing that, though they know it ain't okay. That's so frustrating when you can't feel comfortable even in an Internet community. But Viv's "fandom"(I mean exactly these two shows, although Zoophobia also had...... not very pleasant people) is surely something... Where'd you find so many blatantly oblivious and blind brown nosers which keep pretending everything's good when there's already tons of red flags from Vivienne? Yeah, that's a rare case. I don't wanna interact with this fandom or even talk about it, tbh. I still watch the show cuz it's fun to see how it manages to be worse with every episode, though sometimes I don't make reviews as many other people do it faster and better and I just have nothing to say(I need to take my jaw from the floor). Regarding Stella – well, I don't know on what principles Viv or her team makes merch with the characters, but aren't all characters being sexualized anyway? They even have merch with Chaz, a guy who, like, died in the same episode. And they keep doing new merch with this jerk. And that's obviously because there are people who simp for him. I don't know if Stella's merch may be an insult to those who practice BDSM, I'm not into it, tbh, and I don't take these things seriously, but I find this just a bland sexualisation. Well, it's "sexy merch", but yeah, Stella's all character is based on being a mean aggressive yelling bitch, and this thing....... it must be a character trait, I guess? Or just a sweet treat for rule34 artists, like most of the stuff Viv does. Again, I don't take all of this seriously, this sexy merch was made to tease and please the simping fans, but there's certainly a part of irony in it. Like, people in this fandom hate Stella so much that they shit on people who simply want her to be a more complex character, and they're........ still buying all this stuff. They........ enjoy Stella being "hot dommy mommy" and still keep hating her? Ngl, only Viv's fanbase can do that, lol. I've seen this fandom from the start and I can say that many people here always had some weird obsession with Valentino. I even remember some person passive aggressively telling me that "he's just very charismatic and it's your problems if you can't see it". When there were, like........ A musical clip and a comic where he just was being an abusive jerk. Yeah, that's a really weird fascination. Also, doesn't one of HH's crew, who is an animator or a director(don't remember correctly), has a rape fetish and has drawn an animatic on their beloved ship Angel/Val? Hella ironic that a show about serious portrayal of trauma and abuse has a crew member(or members) which legit....... find it hot or cute. That's sick af but I guess Viv doesn't care who she hires. Oh, that's definitely not a pit I would like to fall in. I'm not sure there's any hope on Hazbin portraying trauma or mental illnesses properly, but I'll still watch it anyway. Whenever it comes out....

[illarian-rambling]

Thanks for the tag @gioiaalbanoart!

Writblr Interview

Short stories, novels, or poems?

Oh, definitely novels. Even my short stories are pretty long lol

What genre do you prefer reading?

Fantasy, sci-fi, anything fun :)

What genre do you prefer writing?

Definitely fantasy with some heavy steampunk flavor

Are you a planner or a write-as-I-go kind of person?

I'll usually plot out a vague plan for each chapter, but no further than that. Short stories, I pretty much just wing it on.

What music do you listen to while writing?

It's gotta be instrumental or I can't pay attention. I tend towards a mix of video game music, classical, and jazz. Each of my characters has their own spotify playlist linked in my pinned post, so if you're looking for 6 to 8 hours of instrumental music, be my guest :)

Fave books/movies?

Favorite books are anything by Sanderson, the Foundryside Trilogy, and the Kingkiller Chronicles. My favorite movies are the lotr trilogy.

Any current WIPs?

My rotating roster is Honor's Outcasts and The Mystery of the Mortal God. The Final Voyage of the R.S Starbreaker is one I keep on backburner, and I'm currently working on an untitled short story.

If someone were to make a cartoon out of you, what would your standard outfit be?

Probably my work clothes ngl. A fishing shirt tucked into cargo pants, tucked into mud boots with a sun hat and mosquito net. My hair is in pigtails and I'm covered in bug spray. I probably smell musty as hell.

Create a character description for yourself

A tall young woman with a fuckass blonde bob, probably a checked-out expression on her face, and really awful tan lines. She's always wearing a necklace and usually some painted boots. The aesthetics are somewhere between punk and rustic.

Do you like incorporating people you actually know into your writing?

Nah, it's never appealed to me

Are you kill-happy with characters?

Not really, but I've been known to make exceptions

Coffee or tea while writing?

Girl, water. I need hydration lol

Slow or fast writer?

I'm not sure what the metric is exactly, but I'd say decently fast, though it depends on how my life is going also.

Where/who/what do you find inspiration from?

My own brain, books and shows I like, dreams, all sort of places

If you were put into a fantasy world, what would you be?

Probably some sort of alchemist who lives in a basement and eats toads

Most fave book cliche?

Thwarted prophecies. I love it when something goes wrong in a way that's correct to the letter. This is a little ironic, as if never written a prophecy once.

Least fave book cliche?

When characters are overly whiny, but especially when they whine about cool stuff. Like, sorry your shape-shifting abilities are making you question your humanity, but rip to you, I'm different. The only exception to this dislike is if they're whiny in a funny way. Anything is forgivable in literature if it's entertaining.

Fave scenes to write?

Probably those high tension fight scenes or anything with emotional stakes that isn't just a ton of dialog

Most productive time of day for writing?

I'd say early afternoon, but I have more free time to write at night

Reason for writing?

These characters are my friends. Giving up would be abandoning them. Also, I legitimately enjoy reading my own writing.

I'll tag @thecomfywriter @albatris @sm-writes-chaos and anyone else who wants to play :)

[akatsuki-shin]

Hi, @akatsuki-shin thanks so much for sharing your wonderful fanfics. I love to read them...🤩

I found your blog, cause I saw a lot of your JJK posts. Then I realized that you're also the author of quite a lot my favorite fanfics (sorry for being late in realizing it)....

Wow, now that you mentioned it, one of my twitter moot also like to post paralell between SatoSugu and HuaLian, somehow I felt it's not quite fit to their dynamics, and you worded them perfectly....

After reading your previous ask, do you mind if I ask you danmei questions? Can I ask your top 5 (or top 3) favorite characters from 'X'? And why you loved them? And your top 5 (or top 3) favorite moments from the novel? Thanks if you want to answer and sorry for the long ask....

'X' can be Qiang Jianjiu, Can Ci Pin or Mo Du, feel free to pick either one that you want to answer....

Aaaahhh thank you so much for reading my fics! 🥺 Hopefully I can post in the future for you to read hahaha

Yeah, I mean, for a ship to be similar to SatoSugu, I think one of them has to at least give off that Mom vibe like Suguru. Ngl, if Gojo were to marry Geto, he's not only going to get himself a wife but a Mom, as well, because he can be pretty childish and unhinged while Geto is there to make sure he doesn't run off somewhere. 😂

For your question, I'll go with Qiang Jinjiu.

My favorite character is definitely Shen Lanzhou. He's so pretty and smart. If he weren't so sickly, he would've been super strong when it comes to fighting. I love the fact that despite him often being looked down due to his looks and status, he ends becoming the most fearsome character in the story. Like, if you slight Ce'an, you may get off with just a few punches from him, but if you slight Lanzhou, you'll probably disappear that very same day. 😂

Next one is Xiao Ce'an. I love to see his change from wanting to kill Lanzhou on first sight then ended up becoming the most dedicated and loyal lover as the story progressed. Considering how precious Lanzhou is to me, I kinda share Ce'an's adoration for him and it just makes me happy to see him trying to spoil Lanzhou in every way.

For the third place, I'm not sure if I should say Papa Xiao Fangxu or Qi Zhuyin. They both definitely have a special place in my heart because of how strong and cool they are. Maybe I'll put Papa Xiao on 3rd and General Qi on 4th because I really love how we can see Xiao Fangxu's personality in Ce'an, especially with the way they both love and adore their partner. Qi Zhuyin is super awesome, though. Despite everyone's doubt on her as a woman, she proved to be a great and strong general (I think her troops are the most crucial there because she leads, like, 300thousand soldiers or something?).

I think it's pretty weird to put this one as a favorite character, but for some reason, I really love Ce'an's horse, Lang Tao Xue Jin. This horse always has the coolest description whenever it shows up and it's so funny when CeZhou had sex that night while riding the horse. The poor thing, LMAO. Also love Meng the gyrfalcon. I love them both. <3

As for my favorite moment, my number one is definitely when Ce'an resurrects the Libei Armored Cavalry after his father's death, that battle when they caught the Scorpions off-guard bytheir weapons and tactics upgrade in winter and pushes them all down to the Chasi Sink Hole. What I love the most about QJJ is how cinematic the battle scenes are and that one, followed by how Lanzhou desperately jumps into the sink hole to chase after Ce'an like a scene straight out of his nightmare is so uuurrgggghhhhhh 😭😭😭

Next one is the huge decisive battle with Hassen. Like, man, I didn't think I sleep at all until I finished that entire arc until Ce'an came and finished Hassen for good. From the very start when the invasion has just begun, to when the old commander (Yin Chang?) sacrificed himself outside the gate, when Fei Sheng rode all the way to lit the tower, when Tantai Hu came with reinforcement, and when Ce'an shot his arrow right before Hassen killed Lanzhou. I truly have no words; that must be the coolest battle scene I've read in my whole life.

The third one goes back a bit further to the earlier part when Lanzhou lets Ce'an go and locks him out of the city gate, so he could confront the guy who killed his teacher (Han Cheng, I think). But then Fei Sheng opened the gate for him and let Ce'an brought Lanzhou with him. That was so intense and the following hurt/comfort scene is just heartbreaking aaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

I'm not sure what to put as my fourth and fifth favorite scenes because there are so many interesting scenes throughout the story. I do remember two scenes that I still remember to this day.

One is when Qi Zhuyin's vice commander(?) sincerely told her that even if nobody were to remember her after this, then he would be the one to always light a candle for her, and after his death he would make sure his children continue to do the same. Qi Zhuyin really deserved that recognition after all her struggles and this show of sincere loyalty really just strikes me in my weakest point hhhhhhhhh

The other one is when Lu Yizhi came to visit Lanzhou to see what kind of man his brother-in-law has fallen in love with, but Lanzhou has no idea about it at all. And then at the end, Fei Sheng inadvertently opened the gift Lu Yizhi left for Lanzhou and went "mother of god it's a dowry" or something. xD

[starzdeath]

Pspspsps, anyone here for chaos project because I need help choosing a

Ngl, progress for it has been slow bc I haven't had too much opportunity to work on the script but I believe we at least have a sketch done for the first page :D

Be sure to check out @the-chaos-project to stay updated on the comic. I'll be posting some information there soon when the title's all figured out!

Don't know what the Chaos Project is? Learn more below the cut! :D

The Chaos Project or Chaos Project AU is centered around the idea of roboticized Sonic but what if he was like that from the very beginning? In this world Sonic is a robot built by Dr. Eggman, dubbed The Chaos Project, as a means to help claim the world as his own.

All art for the AU is tagged "chaos project art" and all text posts are tagged "chaos project notes." If you'd like to see everything for the au, it's tagged under both "the chaos project" and "chaos project au"

Wait also there's a masterpost in my pinned post if you just want to look through there instead

[noctivague]

Revamping my altar - Part 01🙃

Let's ingnore the fact that I ghosted my blog for the most part of this year and jump right in as if nothing happened....

Starting point

I'm a very aesthetically driven person and I'm bored with my current altar, which has been remained the same for a long time. (I thought I had a picture but I don't and it's gone now so oops...)

I want to create something that puts me in an inspired mood just by looking at it. That looks inviting and beautiful and brings me delight and motivation. A little sanctuary nook kinda.

I want to revitalize things and symbolize the new era i'm in, due to the fact that i recently moved into a new flat, got a new job, and overall my life is very different than it was last year.

So here is the journey of making my new altar :) At the moment it's far from done but here is the first part of the process!

Part 02 will follow once I've received the things I ordered, probably at the end of November or early December.

Inspirations

So i went on a quest to find inspirations on pinterest that would sort of align with what i wanted to make.

ngl I dislike most of what I see because I find them too cluttered for my personal taste. The main issue is that i'm clumsy and i hate the idea of my hand having to slither through a forest of objects to be able to grab what i want lol

Still managed to find a few cool examples, here they are:

I love the rough, folk-esque, natural aspects of them, the blend of stone, marble and wood. The branches, the sculptures, the iconic symbols and the fact that there is a variety of heights of things, if that makes sense. I also like having a strong art piece in the middle, which i prefer over having a mirror like many examples i found. Idk i just find the idea of having to stare at myself at my altar a bit uncomfortable lol

But it's still different from what would be authentic for me and also i gotta do with what i have or what i can buy.

The thing is that my altar is not dedicated to a single deity so i can't go with one strong themed vibe but i have to put them all together. Currently, Apollo, Artemis, Hekate, Dionysos, Hermes and Demeter share the same space.

Furniture

Thankfully the new book shelf I got is quite wide and has three levels, which is plenty enough space to give everyone their own space and even host my incense, tarot cards and spiritual books.

I almost sold a kidney to get an antique cabinet, which looked really cool but was not going to fit in with the interior style of my living room, where my altar is located.

So I went in with a more modern yet slightly organic-shaped one:

Not 100% what I was looking for but at least the space is there. Love the curves an the contrast of the two colors, but I wish the wood was darker. I could sand and re-varnish but who's got time for that.

Current state of the sculptures

I've been collecting sculptures and hand painting them for a while now (you can check out my pinned post for pictures of some of them), and although I love what I made, I really want to get some new ones that are higher and I'm even wondering if I should just keep them white and gold instead of colorful.

Also, for the life of me, I can't find a sculpture of Hekate that I like. They either look too bland or too new-agey for my taste. At the moment, I have the classic three women holding torches and stuff that I hand painted in blue, yellow and silver, but idk it's not what I have in mind and I think I'm just going to resort to do clay modelling myself. I'll probably do a separate post for the process!

Btw I'll do a free giveaway in the future to re-home my old sculptures so stay tuned for that!

What I have in mind

Sooo I'm not sure of the exact height and width of the things that I have coming in, and I'm still looking for a strong art piece or relief to go at the center back so I'm not sure if my disgusting mouse-drawn photoshop sketch is going to be accurate at all lol

The more I stare at it the more I think it makes no sense 🙃

So basically, from left to right; Apollo (new statue incoming); Artemis (old statue at the moment but need to upgrade); Hekate in the center (need to craft that); Dionysos (new bust incoming); Hermes (new bust incoming); and on the lower lever Demeter (still love the statue as I think it's my best one so it will stay this way).

Still missing:

one or two candles i use during worship, preferably gold

art piece in the center, either a plaster relief or canva print of something

plant with long falling ''arms'' (idk the word in english)

dried branches to go in the left vase

a way to fix the antlers to the wall

an old key for hekate (need to go to a thrift store)

maybeee a bigger box to store my incense and ritualistic plates and glasses

I don't think I want a table cloth simply because I had one in the past and it was always a mess to clean. Having the bare table is much easier, especially considering that I will burn incense and candles and that gets messy.

---------------------------------

Okay that's it for this long ass post, see ya in a few weeks for part 02!!!

[apoli-meow]

!REUPLOAD!

Sorry to the person who commented on the original, I see you

~~~

Still listening to Cult of Dionysus.. My parents are worried

Shoutout to that one guy who keeps encouraging me in the first few hours of posting I love you sm

~~~

Sylviaaaaa (tbh she's like the least developed character cuz she's my least favorite (she's just kinda boring ig) but she does have somethings!!)

Name: Sylvia 'Zee' Zbornak

Age: 16

Sexuality: WOMEN- I mean lesbian (butch ofc)

Pronouns: she/her

Race: Mayan (mayan women are so beautiful istgggg- 😭😭💓💓... Sorry just my inner lesbian acting up)

Height: 173 cm (5'7 feet 🙄🙄)

Personality: tired jock, has braincells, is quickly losing them. The only thing that's keeping her from going insane is wander.

~ Random facts ~

• Has 3 younger brothers (triplets, age 10, idc abt canon at this point), her father is dead (yay for me inflicting trauma on my characters)

• Loves motorcycles

• MCR, G.L.O.S.S., Dream Wife (tbh I don't really know any of them at all, but I listened to a couple of their songs and they sound like something she would listen to lmao)

• Gym bros with Hater, they beat up eachother a lot (and beat up other people too)

• Was the one who bullied Peepers in middle school

• Now it's just awkward cuz she feels guilty but also takes no shit

• They are lowkey pissed at eachother but are forced to hang out together since they have the same friend group (hater and sylv becoming friends, wander and peepers kinda reconciling), so they have this sorta agreement to just not address their history (which is working out terribly but anything is better than communication ig)

• She was kind of a terrible person in middle school ngl

• Wander helped her change tho

• Dating Domi obv cuz these two are meant to be

• Her love language is being protective and putting pins on her bag for you. So a couple of them are actually not for her but for her friends ;)

• Her aesthetic is obviously punk but she's definitely more on the chill side.

• Not sure what else to say. Her tattoo is a quetzal bird, a symbol of freedom so I thought it would be perfect for her! Also it's really pretty <3

• Oh, I just remember - her water bottle is a gift from Wander (which is why it's so bright and colourful). She couldn't refuse a gift.

~~~

Yeah, that's basically it. I definitely had fun with this drawing.

Who should I make a post about next? Wander, Domi or Hater? (be warned, Hater is kinda ooc (I'm doing my best here))

Plz respond 🥲 (asking people to respond worked before right?..)

P.S. here's her tattoo ik nobody needs it but I spent an hour on it

[dinoburger]

None of us really know either way, but I do remember speculation in the mid-late 2010s re: whether or not the TF2 comics were leading into something space-related (between what happened to Sniper's mom, the spaceships located in several in-game maps, and the perpetually-unfinished valve map rd_asteroid that used to be in the game's playable map rotation). Entirely guesswork, plus a dash of hope that Valve would continue the storyline post-comics.

:\ yeah, though, ultimately… the comics really shook up the status quo of the game and the established setting, but it's hard to see what conclusion they could've been barrelling toward. Real intrigued by that comics/Helen infographic you posted a few days ago -- I've likewise been puzzling over what Helen's debt could be (for all of the comics' hiatus and then some, lmao). Either way, I don't believe there's enough foreshadowing for us to have figured out whatever-it-is, and then there's the eternal question of "What Comes After?" (both in-universe and regarding Valve's seemingly-dwindling interest in the IP) looming over it all.

(like tumblr user milfy, I'm not really sure what comic 7 could've done to conclude things in a satisfactory way. ngl, sometimes I wish we'd gotten something set during gravel war or mvm -- at the risk of sounding overly critical, I'll admit I personally feel like the fandom missed out on getting some more gravel war era/group-focused content.

though with the then-ongoing [and, hell, somehow-currently-ongoing] status of the game itself, I also feel like the comics ending on too Final a conclusion would've soured some folks' milk. perhaps this is why I continue to entertain the "it was leading into another update" train of thought -- the idea of the comics smacking a big old super-conclusive "The End" onto everything seems unlikely to me, but I cannot fathom what would have come afterwards. or how any currently-raised plot threads would be resolved, if at all.)

… This ask was a whole lotta reiteration/conjecture, so I want to add that I love the TF2 stuff you've been drawing/writing. The classic team and Conagher family lore are so, so fascinating to me, so it's been Like Christmas Morning to me for months lmao. have a good one -🍊

oh man, I would've loved to have more stuff that actually delved into developing the characters during the Gravel wars/MvM... hell, they could've even played off the Scream Fortress shenanigans and have like, a big, ridiculous magical adventure

I also didn't know about the space stuff, that also could've been a cool direction

there's part of me that wants to hope they had some idea of what they were doing but the more I look at it, the more the plot feels like it dissolved more into "stuff that feels really big and important happening" rather than one coherent mystery to unravel, which... the journey should also be important. This is the stuff people criticize Marvel movies for, the twist becomes more important than the actual story. Putting all the eggs in that basket.

I definitely agree... idk like. I think they even could've gotten away with having different canons and not feeling like they had to pin the ultimate resolution of the entire game to the comic, either. Comics can be like that! Different iterations and interpretations of the same universe, that's cool too! IPs get revised and retconned and improved all the time, tbh I think like... the current obsession people have with canonicity can be grating at times.

I think in some ways it's even harder to get past that with an inconclusive work like this because yeah, it does end up being that everyone hopes whatever the conclusion is will be worth the wait, that it'll scratch that itch, and the longer folks go imagining some grand conclusion the higher expectations end up being. You can't really blame them either, at a point, because that's all they really have to go off.

and thank you so much! I love those guys, so I'm grateful when it's appreciated!

[acaplaya-musings]

Voiceplay Visuals - addendums and interesting BTS stuff (part 2/3)

I explained everything in the first part, go find it here. Let's keep going!

(Part 2 below the cut)

We Don't Talk About Bruno: "Also I'm pretty sure I heard from someone that Geoff's "ruana" is in fact just a regular blanket/piece of fabric draped (possibly secured/pinned) over his shoulders" - Yeah pretty much, except specifically it was tied behind his back/over his shoulders - You wanna know how Cesar just seemingly pulled that umbrella out of nowhere? Well it was hidden behind him! Or more perhaps more precisely, his behind hid it! 😂 (His glutes definitely got a workout that day!)

"(Oh and this section really was slowed down in post-production in order to make the petals (and hair flips!) look nice, and so both Ashley and Geoff were having to sing/lip-sync to sped up versions of their vocal lines!)" - Tis true! That whole section was done in basically double speed during filming, and slowed-down in post (the reverse of what Geoff did for his Monster Mash video actually), which makes the resulting footage extra impressive tbh - Also I didn't specify in my original post, but Geoff isn't just wearing the floral blouse - he's wearing the same pink shorts as Ashley as well! 😂 - Bonus fun fact: the little rat on Geoff's shoulder was remote-controlled!

Dream On: "(Also this was filmed in some old school I believe? I think maybe Cesar's old school or something?)" - Right on the first count, wrong on the second - this was Eli's former high school! (Very much no longer in use as a school though, obviously) - It was filmed in Leesburg, which is an hour away from Orlando apparently, and since there was obviously no decent part of the building to be used as a breakroom or dressing room or whatever, they brought a production coach, the same one that got used for the same purpose for the Panic Medley filming in fact! - The shirt/top that Geoff wore in the video was quite tight-fitting apparently, and he needed additional assistance from Kathy to get it fully pulled down (she helped while still filming) - Still not entirely sure what Layne is wearing on top of his shirt, but it seems to be just draped over his shoulders, idk

Running Up That Hill: - They put a lot of effort into recreating That Scene from Stranger Things, like they had pieces of paper with shots from the TV series and annotations written on it and everything! - The jacket that Geoff had tied around his waist in the video is like some black bomber jacket/letterman-style thing, and he was wearing it sometimes in between takes and ngl he looks good in it, like I almost kinda wish he had been properly wearing it in the video.

"Based on the very-fixed and very-specific shots we get of Ashley while she's "levitating", I'm guessing this was more done via clever editing and post-production work rather than anything like harnesses to actually lift her in the air" - Well, while it is true that editing trickery was favoured over harnesses, there was actually a bit more practicality involved than what I guessed/imagined. Idk how much I should reveal, but let's just say that Ashley had to use some muscles for it!

Hide And Seek (Ding Dong!): "I love the ghostly visual effects on Lauren, with the glowy ethereal outline of her silhouette, and the slight translucence on her dress!" - The effect also helps conceal the fact that she wasn't in the studio with them at all! Magic of greenscreen, just like with VoicePlay's Enemy video! In fact, Layne took a very quick flight to Nashville, Tennessee to help Lauren record her parts, before quickly flying back to Orlando, Florida (in time to beat an oncoming hurricane!)

"I have a feeling that the lighting on [Layne] is such that it makes him look like an actual Haunted Mansion/Disney Parks ride animatronic (especially when combined with deliberate movement/acting choices in the video)" - I mean yeah, maybe, but also tbh it's also just the whole makeup/costume itself - even in the BTS footage he didn't look fully "human"/"real" when in the full costume. - Fun fact: Layne also had black food colouring in his mouth to further add to the whole look! Wild!

"Absolutely loving Cesar's makeup in this one ngl (I wonder whether he coloured his face and/or hair blue for filming this or if that was just all done via editing?)" - That was all thanks to Rick Underwood! His hair and face really were that blue! (Not all his hair though, just the front section of it). - I still have questions about Geoff's makeup though - didn't get to see much of the process in the BTS video, rip. - The floating crystal ball was a practical effect, done with fishing wire and a pulley system controlled by Tony!

Golden Hour: - So the greenscreening of the heads was done a little differently to how I imagined, and Geoff's hair did in fact look just like that during the filming - it's not just the editing - This is actually the second version of the video that was created - Patrons were initially presented with a different video (which I haven't actually watched but heard about in the BTS) with a slightly different setting and alterations to the story (Layne came up with a few different ideas in fact). - Also I may be slightly colourblind, because I thought that vest was maroon, but it's actually just brown, lol rip.

Valhalla Calling: "check out the set! I like the shields in the background." - Everything other than the benches and props in the foreground was completely digital! They filmed in front of huge digital screens (and I mean HUGE) that had the pre-designed backgrounds displayed on them! - Y'know how all the guys were wearing furs and heavy layers of clothing and all that? Yeah well apparently on the day of filming, the air conditioning at Vu Studios was busted, RIP (Rick Underwood had to help blot away some of their sweat between takes!)

Part 1 // Part 2 // Part 3

[bedheadnoodle]

Hey guys! So I just wanted to come on here and say that incase any of you haven't seen my current inbox status in my bio, I am unfortunately on a hiatus so yeah 😭. I am going to start using my bio more to update my inbox status since I usually disappear without an explanation (one of my friends called me the coryxkenshin of tumblr dawg 💀). Anyways, I hope everybody has a nice winter break and I'll see all you gorgeous and lovely people in 2024 <3

Also uh...we kinda need to talk about the boundaries between you and I because although I ain't gonna calling out their name—I want you guys' to know that if you do see me active on here aka reblogging or online in general– please don't spam me in my inbox with asks/vents/love notes that you've already sent to Leona when you know that I've saw them all already. I get it, I really do. A comfort character is a comfort character, but I have rules for a reason that I know all of you have seen. You think I don't memorize your guy's usernames? Plus, it *is*pinned to the top of my page so prettyyy hard to miss.

Sadly though, one of these rules had been broken by the same person who had been spamming me with so many of these asks. I won't go much into detail of what the message was since I know it could trigger someone, but the person was roleplaying as if they had been under the influence of something and were slurring out Leona's name, wanting to put their hands on him. I, personally, am not comfortable with that at all due to a history of SA in my life and substance abuse that is still being used around me and that's even harmful to my health. So at the time that when that ask had been sent and I had read it, I couldn't hide my disgust and I still can't when thinking about it.

Hopefully the person will see this post and stop and make sure to pick up on the boundaries between the two of us (Plus I have a whole character ai bot I added with actual lines from the game and lore?!?? Like that should be a lot better than me in general ngl./j)

Also sorry to put this all on you but if you made this far it shows you're a true noodle (my followers new nickname 😋) and you didn't just skip over my entire message. Or you did and I just dunno abt it lmao. But uhhh...Sad to say buds that I am, well, not really in the twisted wonderland fandom anymore 😭? Yeahhh. Sorry to all my pooks who followed me for my twst content 💔

[egg-emperor]

I've seen many people making posts and comments about wanting to be manhandled by or submit to Eggman in some way, and that's completely valid, but I think I'm one of the few who likes it the other way around. Yes, this man is big and strong and powerful and evil, but doesn't that make it so much better when *he's* the one kneeling to *you* in private?

I'm one of those who loves to think about being manhandled by and submitting to him but I also adore it the other way around equally. I'm sure many expect my ns4w blog to be all about the former with how I talk on this one but it's actually the other way around way more often, I write submissive classic and modern Eggman the most hehe. It's severely underrated when it comes to any version other than Boom Egg and I always hope to get more to consider it and how great it is that it isn't obvious and expected out of his character (even though his leather and latex outfit is pretty slutty ngl lol)

I love that he's so big, strong, powerful, and evil with a confident dominant personality, that people would never expect he could secretly be the one to kneel before or bend over for someone. Nobody would believe what he's into and how he gets when he gives into his desires. I like to imagine him getting adorably flustered and embarrassed to submit because of his pride and how he thinks "what would everyone think if they knew their powerful fearsome future ruler, someone they're supposed to obey and submit to, secretly gets into situations like these?" but it's also part of the thrill.

He loves it and desperately needs it but the only way to get it out of him is in private in the moment when desire and pleasure takes over. It'd be so cute to see him blushing and drooling on his knees or back arched with desire in his eyes and soft whines. And if he tries to demand it like he does everything else in life, he's put in his place and made to beg instead as he gets worked up and needy. To see him give in and let his mind go blank with pleasure when he offers himself to let another use him sweetly and gently or rough up and overpower him (he's built for it) and make him feel good... 💕

I'd love to tease him and tell him how cute it is to see him like this and make him admit that he loves it, almost torture him with teasing and pleasure to get it out of him and when he finally breaks and admits that he loves to be pinned down and loved or roughed up and toyed with or service, gives into temptation, and lets himself enjoy it then he becomes addicted. I love to imagine it being the only kind of situation to have any kind of power over him and make him weak. And with how the two of us present ourselves, nobody would ever expect that the roles could be reversed 🤤😍💜💕💘

I love to talk about subby classic and modern Egg here. 🥰 (18+ only obviously)

[away-ward]

Hellow, i'm a newcomer!!! I love your contents, and i might watch thailand f4(?) after this because of your blogs! Anyway, I like your blogs because there just seems to be so many different kinds of people interacting with you here?? It's so obvious and you can kinda see if they like dn or its characters or not by their asks. That led to me: You know, i've never thought the DN series books to be OVERLY repetitive but when you, your anons, and your mutuals put a lot of twos and twos together about how repetitive some plots points, characteristics and sex scenes were, it became even clearer to me about how a lot of them are just so similar now. As if it's a formula at this point.

Another scene that came to mind was when alex told aydin she can fuck whoever she wanted, this scene literally transported me back to winterdamon's bathtub scene where winter was touching herself and said some cringey shit about "little sister" "not being bossed around" or damon being her daddy or something and she can do whatever she wants. And alex moaned will's name also reminded me of that scene of rika moaning trevor/kai's name when she's with michael too, and banks with kai about damon during their first intercourse (these happened right? im pretty sure they did or my mind might just be messing with me?).

And winter calling other girls easy like how rika did in corrupt? Banks rika hideaway aka alex emmy train scene in nightfall? Even the misogyny was repetitive!!!! hELP i hate it here mom 😭 this makes me feel like rika/alex/winter are literally the same type of pd's ideal characters, the mary sue but slutty type, but not much of a whore though, but also badass, only with different hair colours and societal backgrounds. Banks is only similar to emory with her colour, Thank fucking god! Because the other FMCs were LITERALLY so similar in many ways to me. And i feel like it's so unfair because we already got so little of great FMCs in this series whatnot with the opening book: corrupt was just pure shit, but why did pd had to butcher them like that? Even the horsemen had very distinct personality, EVEN IF they had similar characteristics to their friends. Even kai and damon were told to be similar, but they were very different, thats why it wasnt confusing (to me at least). What's with pd and their formulaic overly repetitive writing? Idk if im gonna read their fall away series if they're like this too. Had anybody read it? What are your thoughts on it?

---And on a side note, funny (sarcastic tone) how a lot of things alex said or did about will or emmy's personality/situation in general could have hurt emmy (as a friend), but alex did it anyway, but then alex turned around and was always seen to be not-understanding of em's situation, and sometimes she was even inconsiderate towards how emmy COULD possibly feel about alexwill's past hookups as em's friend, even laugh at her when she was jealous of them (and also for moaning will's name!! Wtf! Pd was so wrong for making will sleep in the same bed with alexemmg. I also hate that we get to see willalex's friendship and trust building even in tidbits, but we can't get the same or more for THE main couples themselves? Will can build that trust with alex to the point she knew he would come for her and be there for he, but pd couldnt make will build trust with emmy? Will grayson deseve to die the most painful death ngl)

(Idk if these alexwill asks had been made clear by your anons many times before or not, but i have only seen your recent blogs so idk, but ig my point still stands. Please do pin/post something to indicate if it has been mentioned or if you're ever tired of seeing them for newcomers like me so we can filter our asks, if this is not too much for you) Then alex was hypocritically literally going batshit crazy for all the insinuations made by will and aydin about emmyaydin??? The situation was?? It's so???? It's like when it happened to emmy, emmy was expected to be okay with it, and not show much jealousy, expected to be perfect always, not only that, even emmy herself kept on doing all the emotional work of everyone on her own, but when it comes to alex (or even will), not only they were cruel with their words and actions, they were also irrationally angry at em at the weirdest of time? As if they had no common sense or something? Like they're the only ones suffering? Funny how will said how em didnt know how will suffered or how alex said to em about how em was not the only one suffering? But alexwill were insufferable as fuck, and they were the ones who kept on being dramatic and dgaf about em's feelings or safetyl, so?? Alexwill Truly had horribe personilities, and they were always seen to be inconsiderate of em's feelings with their thinking unless em called them out for it too, but why does emmy has to tell how much they were hurting her ALL THE TIME so only then they would stop and consider how she felt? So fucking selfish. Alexwill were really so fucking annoying istg---

Just like some of your anons, nightfall ruined will's character for me, i was so disappointed in him because he was described as "being different than his friends" in other books (and maybe the povs we got were from his worse friends, so maybe thats why the bar was under the fucking ground) but then anons were right, in his book, his outward actions were shown to be LIKE THAT. But then again, if he's been best friends with those same disgusting horsemen all his life, why wouldn't he pick up the same hurtful words and behaviour from them, even a little, right? Birds from the same feather after all. When you guys said how similar will and michael were about their misogyny and how that was the main reason why that anon hated will, it became clear to me even more why i hated will in nightfall, because gooododdd i hate michael for the same reasons too!!! That anon just put my hatred better into words. Sometimes i feel like i have a different expectations of how a dark romance should be and then i came across these books and they totally were not within my expectations, they're worse, so my expectations were the one to ruin my enjoyment of reading these dark romance books in general. Maybe idk.

Anyway, if theres any anons who love will grayson, or if KO (away-ward) yourself have some long paragraphs of why you guys love will, please do share because even as a will hater myself, its a bit existing to be in this space for Will and Emmy with so many will hates lol! Maybe if you guys share your cute reasons why you love him here, MAYBE i'll like him better and change some of my opinions about him. In very much need of will grayson appreciation in this will grayson love drought (but ONLY related to emmy please, idgaf about his cute scenes with others, especially damon. I had enough in canon, im sick of them.) 😂

Hey! Welcome.

It would make my day if you decided to watch F4 Thailand. No pressure though. The story is absolutely bonkers, but it's really close to my heart. It’s nice to know someone is getting something from the f4 posts. I mean, I’m entertaining myself, so not getting any notes hasn’t been a deterrent at all, but still. At least I know not everyone hates them. If you do decide to watch, I’m using Viki. It’s free there, as are several of the hana yori dango/boys over flowers versions, if you want to dive right in. Comparing them has been a lot of fun.

Idk if these alexwill asks had been made clear by your anons many times before or not, but I have only seen your recent blogs so idk, but ig my point still stands. Please do pin/post something to indicate if it has been mentioned or if you’re ever tired of seeing them for newcomers like me so we can filter our asks, if this is not too much for you

I’ll start off here. I, for one, don’t mind rehashing the same information. Sometimes it can be a bit redundant when I feel like I have nothing to add because I’ve said everything I have to say, but I don’t want the anon to feel like I’m ignoring their point, but for the most part anon usually bring up a new point or consideration I hadn’t thought of before, so it’s not too bad. There is a “Tag System” post on the desktop that goes over how I tag my posts to find what you’re looking for. However, if you’re using only mobile, it probably won’t show up. I’ve been meaning to add it to the master list for ease.

For a quick run-down, I tag all of my answered messages with “asked and answered”, so searching that tag within my blog will bring up all the previous discussions. You can also search by a character’s full name, but that will bring up all posts concerning them, even if it’s something I rb’d and just tagged as the character. However, that doesn’t always work. I get the best results when I just click the tag I want from a post. That typically works a bit better, simply because Tumblr’s search system is pretty bad by all accounts.

If that doesn’t work, let me know, and I’ll see if I can work out another method.

Anyway, on to your thoughts!

I like your blogs because there just seems to be so many different kinds of people interacting with you here. It's so obvious and you can kinda see if they like dn or its characters or not by their asks

I certainly wasn’t expecting the blog to develop this way. My thoughts are that people just like a place where they can express their thoughts or rant about something without having to fear being judged or someone attacking them for it. There are a lot of things about the series to complain about (obviously), but when people are so deeply entrenched in fandom stuff, it can be hard to realistically critique it without backlash. But it’s all fun to me, so I don’t mind. It’s worth a laugh.

And I hope it’s a lot of different people. It seems to be, but since most are on anon, I can’t really know. It hasn’t been a problem since everyone has been respectful and nice to the other anons, so I can’t complain about that.

DN series books to be OVERLY repetitive but when you, your anons, and your mutuals put a lot of twos and twos together about how repetitive some plots points, characteristics and sex scenes were, it became even clearer to me about how a lot of them are just so similar now. As if it's a formula at this point.

It didn’t feel repetitive to me at first, either. It really was after talking about certain parts so many times that I began to realize they felt like others parts in the series. I think there’s enough different about each scene that it’s not that easy to identify. And, to go along with that, I think it’s because of something you said.

The guys are different.

It’s hard to say which is worse in the series: the horsemen or the women. Obviously, the horsemen take more heat for their misogyny and general lack of accountability wherever they go, but there’s no denying that they are much more developed characters than the girls’. Because the horsemen are the heart of the series. They were there from the start; it’s really all about them.

So what we get left with is PD’s idea of an empowered woman. Which I guess looks one of two ways? Or the idea that these four friends would only be interested in one of two types of women?

You get sexy blonde or sassy brunette. Take your pick.

But I don’t want to break the characters down that way. I’ll never back off the idea that writing is hard, much less writing something of this size. Everyone grows in skill at a different rate, and I would have been excited to see what this story would look like in the hands of a more experienced PD. It’s a shame that the community’s fighting has tarnished their love for the series in a way. But since we got it the way we did, it seems that PD liked a few dynamics or that their imagination lead them down the same path because it’s what they liked, and in the end re-used them, maybe even unconsciously.

Alex told aydin she can fuck whoever she wanted, this scene literally transported me back to winterdamon’s bathtub scene where winter was touching herself and said some cringey shit about “little sister” “not being bossed around” or damon being her daddy or something and she can do whatever she wants

I hadn’t noticed this one, but then it’s no secret I don’t remember a lot of KS haha. Hideaway and KS are my weakest in the series, so they’ll have the most holes for me.

this makes me feel like rika/alex/winter are literally the same type of pd's ideal characters, the mary sue but slutty type, but not much of a whore though, but also badass, only with different hair colours and societal backgrounds

It is a bit frustrating that at times the girls felt like copy/paste. Like it wouldn’t matter who was in the scene, it would unfold the same way. I talk a lot about Alex’s weakness as a character, but that’s mainly because she could have been a good character if she wasn’t written to be perfect in every scene. At times Rika and Winter fall into this trap too.

Not playing favorites, but it could be why I like Emory and Banks a little more; they’re allowed to be imperfect and admit it without making a big deal about it.

Emory says something mean to her friend and apologies. It’s never brought up again, but Emory doesn’t become someone who never makes that mistake again.

Banks gets irritated that she’s dragged-out shopping, but later thanks Alex for her help. It just seemed in the narrative, the other three had to be right always, and if they were angry or mean, it’s because they were right meanwhile, Banks and Em were allowed to be wrong or needless mean sometimes, as we all are.

Idk if im gonna read their fall away series if they're like this too. Had anybody read it? What are your thoughts on it?

If someone has anything to share, feel free. I can post without commentary. All I’ve read is Bully and I can definitely say it was more tame that DN, and felt more like PD was just starting out, working their imagination while DN was more like them pushing their imagination pass it’s limits. It’s not a bad thing for a writer to do that; it’s good. But as a comparison to understand the two different feels of the books to me. Bully was like the first time you go for a run while DN was like a marathon, in terms of writing and creativity.

I still don’t know if that made any sense at all. Sorry.

And on a side note, funny (sarcastic tone) how a lot of things alex said or did about will or emmy's personality/situation in general could have hurt emmy (as a friend), but alex did it anyway –

There’s a lot to say about the Alex situation. To me, it feels like PD started with one intention for NF and Willemmy, but as they let their writing group get involved, those who already had an attachment to Alex, the intent went out the window to appease them. It’s easy to get caught up in the excitement when ideas are flying, so if that is the case, I see how it could have happened. It’s just so sad that it did.

Alex should have either been Emmy’s friend or Will’s protector, but she couldn’t be both. That’s the most confusing part of the whole situation. Alex appears in NF first as someone one Emmy’s side and showing concern about Will. But as the novel progresses, she bounces around between being Will’s protector from Emmy and Aydin, to being Emmy’s friend and comforter, to hating Aydin and anyone who aligns with him – namely Emmy. She constantly rotates between these three states, and it never made any sense to me – and apparently several other readers.

I wouldn’t have minded seeing Will and Alex’s friendship developed more if it made clear why Will could never love her the way he loved Emmy, but I doubt that would have happened. I believe PD wanted us to see Will and Alex as being so close, they were basically the same person, having a deeper understanding of each other. It however, never comes to light that way in NF and instead we’re left with a shipping war that was never meant to be.

I can reason on a lot of PD’s executions, but there are a few I can’t let go. One that I’ve been thinking about lately is the fight scene at the cove?

I remember being so mad and hurt and confused that Will would leave Emmy to take on Martin while he fought Aydin. Why would he let Martin lay another finger on her? Why was Aydin more important at that moment, when we know that Aydin doesn’t want Emmy that way. He wants to hurt Will and Alex (at least as far as Will knows).

And then for Alex to be shot by Martin, and that’s what stops the fighting? And then that’s when Will finally kills him. Yes, it was for Emmy technically, and I have no doubt that Martin was trying to shoot Emory, that shooting Alex was a mistake because they were fighting.

But it’s just the narrative of it all. It really sends the message that Alex is more important to the story, to the family, to Will then Emory is.

Emory says Martin will never lay a hand on her again, and while I appreciate the overall idea of her finally fighting back, I would have loved it all the more if she had posed herself to fight him and Will refused to let her. She’d conquered her fear of him; it didn’t mean Will needed to let her fight that fight. I’m so tired of PD putting Emory in the backseat while Alex gets to right passenger in Will’s life. And it’s not fixed until Alex leaves to be in Aydin’s life. I just don’t get it.

Where’s Michael with his “I love you guys, but she is everything!” speech? I need that guy to sit Will down.

But anywho.

Funny how will said how em didn’t know how will suffered or how alex said to em about how em was not the only one suffering? But alexwill were insufferable as fuck, and they were the ones who kept on being dramatic and dgaf about em’s feelings or afety, so??

Yeah, that was pretty irritating. I just kept thinking, “do we all remember who was the one being physically abused for years? Are you talking to the girl who literally just lost her grandmother, the only person who every really cared about her? Oh, your pain is worse? Got it.” I would dare any of them to say those kinds of things to Damon and watch what happens. But no. Em’s got to suck it up.

will's character for me, i was so disappointed in him because he was described as "being different than his friends" in other books

To be honesty, I hated Will in the first three books. Except for in the past scenes. I don’t know how deeply you’ve read into the blog, but I’ve talked before about my DN reading journey, so I won’t go too in depth now, but I was really looking forward to Emory’s story and Will was so boring that I almost didn’t make it.

And then in NF, all I cared about was the past scenes. For me, that was the real Will and anything that happened after that was because he was emotionally disturbed by his heartbreak, and then stunted by his time in prison. It’s not an excuse for his behavior, but a reason I can work with.

Will is not nearly as bad alone, even in the present scenes, as he is when he’s with Alex. The WillAlex shippers really got the best of PD at some points, and it shows. Present Will is not great, but I can work with him in terms of character. Will with Alex is too much because Alex in general doesn’t make sense and is a poor character.

But then again, if he’s been best friends with those same disgusting horsemen all his life

I’m laughing because sometimes when I read sentences like this, I wonder how you as a reader made it through the series. The only reason I kept reading was for the horsemen and their friendship.

Will didn’t just pick up bad traits from them. He probably provided some of his own. It’s why the four of them work so well. I remember Damon saying that Will was the most trouble for his parents. He’s always been this way.

When you guys said how similar will and michael were about their misogyny and how that was the main reason why that anon hated will, it became clear to me even more why i hated will in nightfall, because gooododdd i hate michael for the same reasons too!!! That anon just put my hatred better into words

And this is exactly why it’s worth sharing your thoughts, even negative rant-y ones, because you never know when you’re saying exactly what someone is thinking. You’re probably not as alone as you think in your views. It’s no one wants to deal with the backlash if the wrong person reads it, so we keep silent.

Sometimes I feel like I have a different expectations of how a dark romance should be and then I came across these books and they totally were not within my expectations, they’re worse, so my expectations were the one to ruin my enjoyment of reading these dark romance books in general. Maybe idk.

I guess it depends. DN left a lot to be desired in terms of execution. I usually don’t go into with expectations other than somewhat decent writing, so it could be that you’re expecting literary worthy storytelling when the truth is you’re getting the equivalent of fast food. Maybe I’m wrong. But I think it’s worth for you to list out the things you want from a dark romance and that might help you identify what you’re looking for a little faster, so you don’t waste your time (and brain cells, if you feel that you’ve lost some just trying to process all of this).

if theres any anons who love will grayson, or if KO (away-ward) yourself have some long paragraphs of why you guys love will, please do share because even as a will hater myself, its a bit existing to be in this space for Will and Emmy with so many will hates

  I’ve come to the conclusion that there’s a Will that lives in my head that doesn’t exist in PD’s and that’s how I’m surviving. It’s a bit hard whenever I’m reminded that my Will isn’t the Real Will, but then I don’t care cause I think my Will is better.

I don’t know how to explain my Will other than he’s everything I wanted from NF and somehow he developed from the same place as Real Will.

All I can say, and I hate doing it because I feel like I’m assigning homework, is that if you want to understand how I see Will, you’ll have to read my Will grayson iii tag. Just click the one at the bottom of this post and go from there. That’s all I got.

especially damon. I had enough in canon, im sick of them

So hey, everyone! If you’ve got any other Willemmy HCs or thoughts or scenes that you just really liked that you’ve been sitting one because you weren’t sure if it was the right time to share, this is a request to send them in. Sounds like this anon needs them.

Thanks everyone! and thanks, Anon, for your message. It's nice to hear from you and hope you enjoy the other content.

*This is unedited and will have some spelling and grammar mistakes. Edits will be done within the day*