#not my best work. love them though

[youdgetbored]

Last day for @merlintarotfest !yikes. (6 pages I think)

Rating: general

Summary: merthur hurt/comfort

Title: Always

Justice 

King of pentacles 

Ace of wands

Arthur was always making a decision. He sits at a wooden table, arms clasped in front of him. A choice must be made, today no different from any other.

As a prince he hardly thought about the balance of the world. Then the day came when he was king.

Every life in the kingdom rested on his shoulders. Each threat of war, of strife, of disaster, it was up to the king to ensure the safety of those who could not fend for themselves. With the crown laid against his brow, Arthur made no decision lightly. But had he ever truly? Sure, jousts and tournaments didn’t weigh on his mind. His fathers temper was a different story. Growing up alongside Morgana's rebellious spirit meant at the drop of a hat, he had to be at her side. As a son who had experienced Uther’s rage firsthand, he knew it was nothing to be trifled with.

So when was the responsibility truly his? Nearly his whole life decided for him before he could walk, when was the gavel placed in his hands? Arthur could not say. The day his eyes opened to it was a different story.

A story that began in his sleep.

Groggy eyed, covered in webs with the rest of the dining room guests, a dagger flew to his chest. To pierce his beating heart, stop him dead.

When the physician's ward threw himself in front of the weapon.

The boy he had bullied, thrown in jail. He’d nearly taken his head off with a mace, yet Arthur lived because of him. 

The two had become an unusual pair. Camelot knights say they saw the change immediately. Arthur openly siding with a servant over a royal, based only on their word. He risked death to find a cure for a poisoned cup. He disobeyed the law to save a young boy, something only the Druids knew. The qualities of a king were always in him. Decisions made of necessity and fairness, of what was deserved. Death or disgrace was never something he ever feared. Yes, he awoke that day in the dining hall. But it would be later that he found himself to be the judge and the accused in one verdict.

When he found himself on the shore sat across from his servant.

Sat across from Merlin.

Merlin, who he had told to stay home, away from trouble. The pesky servant who didn’t know how to polish armor, who struggled to lift a sword. The boy who had saved his life. Arthur owed him a life debt. To pay it, was only just.

Merlin sits across from him now. It was only hours ago that Gaius was faced with tending to both of their injuries in this very room. Lanterns flicker in their silence, illuminating his shadowed eyes. For a brief moment, Arthur pictures the ember dragon Merlin had conjured the night before. He lets out a deep sigh, a life debt.

***

Gaius has always been a caretaker. Working under King Uther took patience. Gaius did not miss those days, and thank the old gods, Arthur was nothing like his father. 

The day that Arthur learned the truth about Merlin's magic, Gaius hoped he would not see Uthers eyes in his king.

Arthur's sword swung viciously at the raiders. Camelot had been attacked, and the enemy was unrelenting. The knights pressed on, determined to fight. Gaius tended to the wounded in a makeshift hospital, the Citadel already overrun. Gwen stood close by, defending him and his patients. He risked a glance outside to see Arthur take down another enemy. The king fought through his injuries, but Gaius had practically raised Arthur. It was obvious his energy waned. 

Merlin's shout drew both of their attentions. Arthurs head whipped to the side in time to see a soldier with blonde hair shove Merlin to the ground. His head collided with a wooden barrel, the sword he held clattering out of his grasp. He rolled to the side. Had his reaction time been any slower, the spear that came down on his shoulder would have been an injury that Gaius couldn’t cure.

An agonizing cry split through the air. Gaius moved forward without thinking, leaving Gwen behind. He stayed close to the buildings as he ran. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Arthur abandon his current fight, his only concern for Merlin. They ran, Arthur much faster than Gaius’s old bones, decades of labor slowing him down. He had a clear sight of Merlin now, still on the ground but fighting. His attacker wrenched the spear out of his shoulder causing another howl. Merlin kicked with all his might, and the man let out his own yell before falling to one knee.

Gaius was almost there, huffing and sore and almost there. He readied a spell in his mind. Without practice there was no certainty it would work, there were witnesses that he couldn't prevent. The king himself was running towards the same goal. But this was Merlin, and as he saw a second enemy round the corner towards his boy, he had to do something. 

He felt the explosion before he heard it. On Gaius’s left a force pushed him off his feet, his collision with the ground unstoppable. A ringing overtook his ears while he blinked back tears. He tried to pry himself off the gravel with no luck, and he felt the gold in his eyes fade. There would be no magic from him today. Prying his eyes off the ground he found Merlin, and thank the old religion, Arthur had made it to his side.

Merlin was still injured, his right hand pressed firmly against his left shoulder. The man who stabbed him lay limp at his feet. Arthur was in a frenzy, one hand planted firmly on Merlin's good arm with the other clearing a path with his sword. The enemies kept coming though, and while Gaius tried again to clear his head, he saw the soldier catch Arthur off guard.

A pained scream filled the air, immediately followed by a roar. Arthurs knees buckled. His grip on Merlin slipped, his eyes clenched shut. Before he had time to hit the ground, Merlin let off a burst. Of what, it wasn’t clear. Maybe it was the blood rushing to Gaius’s head, or the chaos of battle. One second, Merlin was injured and slow. The next, the air around him turned to static. Gaius didn’t need to see Merlin's eyes to know what they glowed with.

A wave of nausea overtook Gaius, he was not used to this kind of exertion. His gaze was wrenched from his boys as he took deep breaths. Eventually the buzzing in his head stopped. With the battle still raging around him, he pushed himself to his feet. Arthur was still on his knees, his sword stuck into the ground as a crutch. Merlin stood by his side, they had barely moved from their places. Enemies littered the ground around them. The two were untouched, apart from their previous injuries.

Arthur was looking up at Merlin. Though it was more than that. Injuries clouded his expression, Gaius knew Arthur only had a few minutes before he fell unconscious. Gaius followed Arthur's gaze to Merlin's hand, extended out in front of him. The remnants of his spellcasting like a blaze of flame, still at his fingertips. Arthur was not just looking at Merlin.

Arthur was seeing Merlin.

Gaius brings tea to the table they now sit at. He sets it down, stealing a glance towards Arthur. The king's eyes remain locked on Merlin. His expression is unreadable, apart from what Gaius knows is betrayal. It makes sense of course. A lifetime of trust in Gaius, almost a decade in Merlin, all the while witnessing the destruction sorcery can cause. 

Not wanting to disturb them further, Gaius heads towards the door. The brass knob is cold in his hand. He gives a tug, the old wood resonating a loud creak through the room. As he walks through the doorway, he hopes only that his boys can find patience and understanding within each other.

***

Merlin is never free. His mornings begin before sunrise, with breakfast and laundry and cleaning. To be at Arthurs side is never dull, and jokes aside, it's work that Merlin enjoys. When he is not by Arthurs side he often finds himself with Gaius. The skills of a trained physician live within Merlin after years of healing injuries. Most days, it is rare to have a moment to sit with his thoughts. Which sometimes comes as a relief.

Sorcery remains outlawed in most parts of the land, why wouldn’t it? The hunt for dragons was successful. Magic can cause great harm, the absence of it should surely be the fix. But magic isn’t something simply conjured, it is intertwined in the world itself. It hums with life. Merlin was born with the power of a sun. He has learned to keep it in his palms, unseen.

Arthur sits across from him. He wears a scarlet tunic, faded from use. His eyebrows are knit with indecision as they have been for the past couple minutes. Merlin glances down at the two cups of tea between them, steam coming off the tops. He cannot think of something to say, to make up for the lies. At the beginning they were out of necessity, Uther would've never stood for a sorcerer in the court. When Arthur became king though, the circumstances changed. Was there a better time? A moment Merlin could’ve told him by his own choice. Merlin is pulled from his thoughts as Arthur reaches for one of the cups. 

“The whole time?” Arthur's voice is not harsh, but Merlin is still struck by the suddenness of it. Does he mean the whole time they’ve known each other? The whole time he’s been king? He’s had magic his whole life, is he asking from the beginning? Merlin doesn’t know where to start. He doesn’t break the king's gaze.

“Yes.”

Arthur expects him to go on, or maybe he too doesn’t know what to say, because another silence fills the air. Merlin knows his expression must be sorrowful, though he can’t seem to rid himself of it. 

Arthur turns the cup slowly on the table. “How much of it was a lie?” 

If Merlin was not already shattered, this would have broken the glass. Pinpricks form behind his eyes and he stifles them. He rolls his left shoulder back, letting the pain from the night before wash over him.

“I’m still your friend, that was always real.” Merlin can barely say the words. No explanation feels good enough for why he’s waited this long. He has no ulterior motive, nor was it something Arthur did wrong. Even through his arrogance he's had a soft soul. How can Merlin explain-

“You didn’t trust me.” 

The hurt in Arthur's voice is overwhelming. When Merlin brings his eyes up to meet his kings, he is struck by how much yearning lies in them. Here he sits, faced with an impossible choice, and he wants.

Merlin holds Arthurs gaze, “I do trust you.” It seems too simple. Thoughts swarm in his head, jumbling his words. 

Arthur adjusts his cup again, still having not taken a sip from it. His eyes drop to the worn wooden table. He places his cup to his side and winces, one of many injuries flaring up. 

“Is it your arm?” Merlin leans forward. 

“You don’t have to do that,” Arthur sighs, but his look of concentration doesn’t break. 

Merlin cocks his head. He tends to be the jumpier of the two of them, but Arthur hasn’t moved much at all today. 

“I can get Gaius if you’d like,” Merlin stands from his chair, “You shouldn’t let those cuts go unchecked.”

Arthur reaches out a hand to stop him, “Merlin, just leave it.” He shuts his eyes with the movement.

The injuries should be healing by now. Merlin makes his way past him to grab a tonic for the pain when he catches a glimpse Arthurs lower shirt. A dark patch has formed near his ribcage.

“Are you bleeding?” Merlin kneels at his side.

Arthur shakes his head, “I opened it this morning, it’s fine.”

“Arthur-”

“Merlin.” Arthur's eyes meet his again, this time wet with grief. Merlin stays there, hands frozen in the air between them. He looks up at his king, his friend, his other half. He is met with only warmth. 

Arthur places a hand on Merlin's injured shoulder. He thinks of yesterday's battle, of the chaos and franticness and fear. He replays the fight in his head. Of the collision with the ground, his pierced shoulder. They all fell away when he saw the sword find Arthur. Only a day ago the two of them were flipped. Arthur knelt, looking up at Merlin in awe. Merlin thinks of the aftermath, the rapid explanations, the dragon of embers he had conjured as he lay in bed, Arthur at his side. The choice has never felt like it was his. He wondered if Arthur felt the same way.

Merlin says something he’s already said the previous night.

“I'm sorry.”

Arthur draws his eyebrows together, “I know,” With his free hand, he takes Merlins, “I am too.” 

They stay that way for minutes. Merlin doesn’t know where he would begin, and Arthur doesn’t seem to think it matters. All the years they’ve spent together, a prince and his servant. A knight of camelot and his healer. The king and the sorcerer. Arthur, and Merlin. The longer he holds Arthur's hand, Merlin wonders what could ever change that.

Arthur raises an eyebrow, “If what you said last night is true, I imagine I owe you more than one life debt.”

This is what it comes down to. No matter how much love he holds for Merlin, Arthur is the king. He has to make a ruling that's just, and fair. 

“Then for the crime of sorcerey?” Merlin's stomach twists at calling sorcery a crime, “What have you decided?” The lantern on their right dims, its oil running out. He drops his head, letting his face brush against the hand still on his shoulder.

Arthur's voice is gentle, “That was never a decision I had to think about.”

Merlin snaps his head back up, confusion knit in his own brow. Magic is who Merlin is. It’s more than incantations, more than old scrolls. Magic binds the universe, Arthur himself was born of it. Sorcery has been outlawed for decades in Camelot, usually at the penalty of death. Yet for Merlin, Arthur didn’t consider such an outcome.

Arthur stands, hoisting Merlin up to him, “Come on, help me patch this cut up will you.” He lets himself be guided to the cot. As they sit, Merlin feels a spark inside him. He can’t pull his eyes away from Arthur.

“While you’re at it, why don’t you tell me how to make a poultice for that shoulder.” Arthur laughs under his breath, “Since I’ve got to do everything around here.” He lifts up his shirt, revealing the open gash. Merlin takes no time to get the supplies. 

“You know,” Merlin says, sitting next to him, “You really should’ve told Gaius about this sooner.” Merlin begins to treat Arthurs wound, hands working swiftly and soft. The air around them settles, an unasked question between the two answered. At least for now. When Arthur is bandaged up, he drops his shirt.

“I mean really,” Merlin smirks, “We can’t have the king collapsing from blood loss.”

“Merlin?”

“Yes?”

“Shut up.” A hand grips Merlin's shirt collar and tugs him forward.

The kiss is an eruption. It ignites the embers in Merlin, sets loose a flood, burns down the castles and walls, shakes all the trees in the forest. First a kiss, then a hand on his face, his own hand against Arthurs chest. Then there is only Arthur. From the day he arrived in Camelot, there was only ever Arthur.

When they break apart, Arthur’s eyes are full of love, same as always. He points to a lantern on Merlin's left.

“Show me again.”

[heartorbit]

figure skating set right now please. thanks

[mossy-aro]

ultimately i think my insistence on aro positivity honestly is as much a political stance as a personal one.

when i say aro positivity is crucial and that i dislike doomer-ist posts that express sentiments like 'I hate being aro so much I wish I was dead instead’ it's not because I don’t think there can and should be a space for negativity and acknowledging self-hate, or the many ways being aromantic can really suck sometimes. i find that to be very important!

that being said. there is smth here about how self-hate posts are sometimes just arophobia that we inflict on ourselves. and when we put that out into the ether it (intentionally or not) can become arophobia that we inflict on other members of the community. i think there absolutely needs to be a place for negativity and the expression of anger and frustration and self loathing even - these are all good things to talk about because these are things that we experience. that being said, it can also be genuinely upsetting and triggering to people to have what is essentially arophobia shown to them and then have that be validated by other aspec people. your personal thoughts can affect your wider community on a level you may not anticipate. and i understand it i truly do! it took me so long to be able to recover from accepting being aroace - it threw my entire world off kilter and made me question everything about my place in the world.

but my insistence on aro joy and positivity is because ultimately i do believe that building is at the core essence of it all. that ultimately discussions and the purpose of community should be about construction, not destruction. and this is both a personal and a political stance. talking about how much you hate yourself and cultivating online discussions/spaces where negativity about aspec identity is the main and only theme is destructive - if that’s where we let the conversation end. these thoughts can and should be used as a vehicle to look for a path forward!

joy and positivity create a space where the focus can become on forging a path forward, on construction, on community building instead of tearing ourselves and others down with negative thoughts. it’s not productive or healthy when it stops at a place of negativity - it becomes actively destructive to the essence of community.

and i do think that this is especially poignant considering the fact that being any kind of queer, but especially aromantic (and/or asexual) means forging a path for yourself and making your own happiness where there is no obvious way forward. our communities exist mostly online (right now, anyway), there is little recognition of our existence in the real world, the effects of amatonormativity are both pervasive and actively dehumanising, and there are legal, economic and social structures in place actively making our lives more difficult. yes that all sucks! it’s good to acknowledge that. we need to in order to change it. but more importantly, that’s not the end. we are still here and our happiness, our future is for us to determine. even if we can’t change the laws or society, loving yourself and understanding aromanticism as a political identity (as well as personal), as a radical worldview, and as a protest against amatonormativity is essential for both community and personal well being. the personal is political.

tldr. i guess my point is that as a community, we should focus on building, improving, and nurturing ourselves and each other (construction) as opposed to destruction. we should recognise aromanticism and asexuality as political identities as well as personal ones and rely on community and self-love in the absence of anything else as a form of protest and political power. destruction (the recognition of everything that is wrong) is essential as a starting point - but where do we go from there? we rebuild.

[inthehouseoffinwe]

Finarfin Fades.

No one expects it, no one’s faded in Valinor since Miriel. The War of Wrath is won and he comes back, waving off the courtiers, well wishers, and congratulators with his usual grace, and walks into the palace of Tirion. To rooms abandoned since their owners left so long ago. Winding deeper and deeper his feet take him to what was once Finwë’s favourite garden.

He’s so tired.

He’s fulfilled his promise to Fëanaro and Nolofinwë, to avenge them. To make the agony of their final moments - agony Finarfin felt, falling to the floor screaming as fire and darkness consumed his spirit - count for something. Now Morgoth is finally gone, but he’s not the only one.

His brothers, larger than life, larger than death, are gone. With them his sons. Niece. Nephews. Grandchildren. His daughter is never to return. He Saw little Nelyo’s death in his dreams and is sure hopes for the child’s own sake that Makalaurë will be close behind.

Little remains. Even less on these golden shores.

So Finarfin sits on a bench long overgrown with vines and weeds, and watches the sun filter through the thicket, wishing the ghosts he sees in his father’s garden would flesh out.

He sits. He waits.

And by the time anyone finds him, it’s too late.

…at least he’s smiling again.

[gatoplaga]

"But beyond all my pain, there was you"

Narilamb designs: @runningwithscizzorz

here's an alt version of Narinder without the veil!! :D

[0m3n-0f-d3ath]

Local knight is enamored by the princess

Fantasy au!Kat and Lily

[ancha-aus]

RealAgeAU Drabble - Birthday Planning

SO! Fun fact. I was kinda running out of ideas.

Then I had THIS idea.

And well. After the last ride? We deserve cuteness don't we? ;)

First Drabble Prev Drabble Next Drabble

No edits we diving right in! (pppst. @spotaus I got the new installment get in here ;) )

*---------------------*

"Horror! Wait up!"

Horror blinks as he turns back around and searches the crowd. It only takes him a moment to spot the excited bunny monster. He tries to give a smile while he waits for a moment for the other to catch up.

Ellie stops before him panting harshly as she leans against him "Oh god." more pants and weezes.

Horror tilts his skull as he keeps the other steady "Hello Ellie... something wrong?" Maybe she needed help or something?

Ellie manages to pull herself upright again adn smiles brightly "Nothing is wrong! It is just I had something very important to ask you guys and saw you so i sprinted all the way over here."

Horror nods and gives her a look "What did you want to ask?"

Ellie grins widely "When is Nightmare's birthday? Like. No worries! I get that you guys havent been here for quite a year yet and with everything going on especially the whole kidnaping thing. we get you guys want the first birthday to just be you guys but Dani realised we still had some of our better quality cherry jams left over and I got the amazing idea to use those in a birthdya cake but! Well.. you know... gotta know when the birthday is. and we both figured it hadn't happened yet as you guys hadn't mentioned yet... so... When is it? And all you guys birthdays for that matter."

horror needs a moment to process all the information she just dropped on him. When he realised what she was asking he realised a tiny problem.

They all come from different universes and the calanders were not the same.

Worse.

Horror isn't even sure if Nightmare even has a birthday he celebrates. They never celebrated it as the castle.

Horror looks down at the groceries in his arms before looking at Ellie "Is it... okay I give an answer later?"

Ellie frowns before her eyes shoot up to his skull and hole and she cringes and rubs her neck as she looks abcka t his face. sheepish smile on her face "Right... sorry. That... that was a lot at once wasn't it? Just... think about it okay? And you guys got our number!" she takes a few steps backwards, almost bumping into someone before she disappears into the crowd again.

Horror sighs in relievve, crisis averted. Now.

When the fuck are their birthdays in this world anyway?

--

Horror returned home to his datemates and their kid. Horror still feels his soul pulse happily even at just the thought.

They sit together in the nest while their dinner cooks slowly in their oven. It is an old stone oven and Horror loves it. it is sturdy and takes up a lot of space but he love using it.

Killer frowns as he is still staring at his phone "I mean... We can just pick dates and call it a day? It isn't like I was still celebrating my own birthday back in my universe anyway. I only started that up again with you guys in the castle."

Dust hums his agreement and Cross nods too "True! XTale also wasn't big on birthdays unless it were the once which marked important ages. I am down to just pick one and call it."

Nightmare frowns as he looks between them before pushing closer to Dust "Not like it matters. It isn't like i am growing and stuff."

Dust nudges Nightmare's skull with his own and mutters softly "Hey... what did Fauna say?"

Ngihtmare doesn't say anything and just pushes clsoer to Dust.

Dust doesn't look like he is bothered by this at all as he just nudges Nightmare gently again "Come on... what did the nice deer doctor lady say?"

Ngihtmare grumbles but actually answers this time "That I won't grow until i am healed."

Dust nods "exactly. As long as you are healing you won't grow. Which, she told us is a normal response for children to have as their bodies and magic are much more fragile." he bonks their skulls together softly "Which means. You will stay our adorable six year old until you are healed fullly. Including physical, mental and magic health."

Nightmare looks down embarresed and mutters "should be healed by now... I am a god..."

Dust looks unimpressed "You are also a six year old who lived his whole life being abused and hurt and when you finally had the power to defend yourself you had to do an adult god's duty." he nuzzles him "Take your time. We aren't in a hurry and any monster knows what it means if a child isn't growing."

Nightmare relaxes a bit and nods. accepting Dusts words.

Dust looks content as he glances up before looking slightyl embarresed as he tubs his hood closer around his skull "what?"

Horror then realises he is staring and a glacne confirms to are Cros and Killer. Cross looks completely enchanted and Killer is straight up cooing. Yeah no wonder Dust is getting shy. He was the same when the four of them spoke about dating.

Horror smiles at Dust before taking his chance to say something "Well. We better pick a birthday for him." Horror smiles at Nightmare "Or do you have one we don't know about Night?"

Ngihtmare shrugs and mutters "Dream and I were born on the longest day of the year... I don't know which date it was in our universe and when it is in other universes."

Killer groans "Of course it was on the sunniest day of the universe- ugh." Killer shoots Cross a glare but Cross jsut sends him a warning look back.

Horror agrees. Killer would have no doubt said something about either Dream or Nim and neither of them matter. At all. Not when they have a babybones that probably never even had anyone celebrate his birthday.

Dust stays on task as he hums in thought "Well... we could figure out when the longest day is here... and say that is your birthday? usually those fall in summer."

Killer shoots upright "or! We can pick the day when the longest night happens! Go right to the other side of it all!"

Horror watches Dust and Killer debate the options while he watches their tiny charge think. and that is why he sees Nightmare blink and looks up a bit as he no doubt gets an idea. Then the doubt sets in wihtout him saying anyhting.

Horror speaks gently "Did you have an idea?" luckily Killer and Dsut shut up right away.

Nightmare shrugs and mutters "maybe... I thought... you know... I became six again... and you guys picked me up so second chance and stuff... so shouldn't that count as the day? Because it is the day this whole thing started?" he tugs himself clsoer to Dust.

Dust hums as he rubs his spine oh so gently "I think it is a great idea." he glances at Killer "Kills?"

Killer grins as he taps away on his phone "already on it! lets see..."

Horror smiles at Nightmare "I think we all agree it is a great idea."

Nightmare smiles a tiny bit and Horror sees a tine glimps of that confident monster Nightmare had been with his powers. Which is good. This means they are guiding him alright towards a future where he is confident in himself, and hopefully happy and healthy.

Killer sits up and holds up his phone in triumph "Figured it out! We got here near mid summer and we had Ngihtmare for two months at that point. Ngihtmare become his true self a month before we got him. meaning!" Killer grins at Nightmare "You are a spring baby!" Killer shows the date to them all.

Ngihtmare looks away embarresed and Dust nods "Sounds good."

Nightmare however looks a bit anxious "But that is so soon already?"

Dust nuzzles him "That is okay. We will just do a small party with us five. Well and Crop and Straw if they want to come."

Horror sees Nightmare looks surprised and just chuckles "It will be nice. Something nice to focus on and enjoy together." he rubs the tiny cheek and Nightmare closes his sockets to lean into the touch.

The five of them relax and eat dinner soon after that as they casually discuss when everyone wants their own birthdays. Horror makes a point of picking up their housephone and calling Dani and Ellie to give them an update on the birthday situation and to invite them the party if they want to and have time. Horror also gives Crop the same update and invitation.

They are together. They are healing. The are happy.

And they have a party to prepare. They have to make sure Nightmare enjoys his very first birthday party after all.

*---------------------*

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[stop-breaking-my-heart-dragonage]

You ever think about how in spite of knowing their exact locations, the game never gives any indication that templar Carver has reported his mage sibling, Merril (a blood mage) or Anders (an abomination) to his superiors?

I do think about that a lot, even though I tend to ignore the Templar Carver route because I know Warden Carver to be true in my heart and soul... but I totally get the appeal of Templar Carver within DA2's narrative, y'know?

It's so fascinating, really. I've never played a run with Templar Carver, I just can't bring myself to do it, so I know I'm missing out on smaller details of it. From what I do know, this drives me crazy in the best way possible.

Deciding whether to bring him or not to the Deep Roads is such an important choice, not only because it affects his fate, but how it affects his relationship to Hawke. He tells you that he wants to go, he makes it very clear that it's important to him that he goes, too... and Hawke can just leave him behind and it hurts him. I don't think that registers enough with some people just because of how Carver is, like it doesn't matter what Hawke's motivations are [staying behind for his safety, not wanting to bring him, thinking someone should stay with Leandra, etc] it still hurts him because it tells him that Hawke doesn't need him, and Carver wants to be needed.

And yes, there are other contributing factors to why he joins the templars, but it doesn't matter what your relationship is to him, it doesn't change the fact that he doesn't turn Hawke or his companions in.

Sure, the meta reason is it's a video game and you're playing the main character. You're never in any actual danger of being captured by templars, and you're not going to lose your companions to them that easy.

But if we look at it through the narrative and Carver's character, that's when it gets interesting. You can max out his rivalry and be an utter asshole to him [there's a point where you can call him a brat and mock him for being stuck in your shadow, like Hawke can be real cruel about it] but it doesn't matter, you're still his sibling. He even makes a remark about how you might not know what that means [referring to leaving him behind] but he does. He refuses to kill Hawke in the end when Meredith makes the order, too.

Which can I just point out that Hawke has the option to let Bethany die in the end if she's with the circle and they side with the templars? Just saying, Carver NEVER does that no matter what, but Hawke has the option to betray Bethany like that and it's fucked and interesting and it makes me want to eat my chair-

As for Merrill and Anders, I think he knows that if he turns either of them in, then the chances of Hawke being brought in as well skyrocket. They're all friends, they're in the same group... bring one in, and you'll probably get the other two.

I also think Carver just genuinely likes Merrill. Yes, I'm a Carver/Merrill shipper, so I have a bias, but even if you remove anything romantic from their dynamic I believe that's true. Of all the companions, Merrill is the only one who doesn't make fun of him, or find him annoying, in party banters. He never snaps back at her, like he's never defensive with her, he's just a little awkward and nice.

Like, HE'S SO NICE TO HER! He tries to find common ground with her! She asks him about "swording" and he's taken aback by her saying he's good at it, but you KNOW that if someone like Anders asked him the same question, he's be all, "shut up, you're stupid, stop talking to me >:["

Think back to that banter Carver can have with Aveline post-act 1 where they're talking about how the guard wasn't the right place for him [hard disagree with you there, Aveline] and Carver says he was a bit of a tit, wasn't he.... and every companion will agree except Merrill. She doesn't say anything, whereas other companions like Anders will be like "ugh maker YES" and if you have a purple Hawke, they'll go on to other ways Carver was a tit like?? I think Carver and Merrill got along and he doesn't want to turn her in because she was nice to him! And she's a blood mage! He knows what will happen to her if the templars get ahold of her! He doesn't want to see her made tranquil or killed!

At that point, he's witnessed what bad blood mages can do, assuming you've brought him along for those quests, but even so. He knows Merrill isn't like that and he likes her, so of course he's not going to turn her in despite that being his literal duty.

Then there's Anders who Carver doesn't like. If you're in a romance with him, Carver will tell him that's why he doesn't turn him in but c'mon Carver, you know that's not the only reason. My theory is Carver may not like Anders and he knows the man's got a spirit of justice inside of him... but Anders also runs a free clinic. If he's ever taken in by templars, then so many people [including a LOT of Fereldan refugees] will be without free health care and will suffer for it. I think in Carver's eyes, Anders might be irritating but he doesn't more good than harm. Carver knows first hand how shitty refugees and poorer people are treated in Kirkwall. Anders' clinic is the one place they can go for help and actually get it, and he's not going to be the one to take that away because the templars say "magic bad."

So yeah, I'm not as informed about the Templar Carver route, but I do think about how if I did do that route, he wouldn't betray Hawke or their companions no matter what and what that says about him.

[front-facing-pokemon]

[w1f1n1ghtm4r3]

she'll be queen to save the world!

[aroaceleovaldez]

i would like to say my ideal PJO adaptation (if i was being physically forced against my will to have to pick a live action adaptation over an animated one for some reason) would be a combo like writing of the musical + casting of the show + visuals of the movies

BUT the show actually does have the playwright for the musical as one of the major writers for like three episodes and that did nothing for it. so...

[fluideli123]

Sonadow Fic Rec

Okay, before you jump down to the masterpieces listed below, I just wanted to state this:

These authors have given this phenomenal content for free, baked with time and effort. I have never once ignored this, hence why I try and comment on each and every one of these fics. However, my energy and ability to be verbose differs day to day. Some of these fics I have not given proper comments for, despite this, I will be on it the moment I can be. In the time being, (once I am able to find my comments on each of these fics) I will be sharing my adoration for them further in other posts (and most likely link back to this one).

With that being said, please, PLEASE take your time to check each of these fics out. If they're not your cup of tea? Valid! But hands down I have never dedicated myself to making a fic rec like this until now. But I MUST share and spread these works, they are much too dear to me not to, and I mean that from the bottom of my heart.

(All fics are listed by order saved in my bookmarks, not in the order read)

tangled threads and bite-marked shoulders by @rubyiiiusions

Words: 32,287 | Series | Complete

Shadow hissed in pain. The laser had just grazed him, but it still stung, and he instinctively gripped the wound it left on his arm. “You dare-” He stopped. The laser hadn’t hit him. In fact, it had struck Sonic, right on his lower left arm. So why did his forearm feel like it just got shot? He whipped around, fear climbing up his throat, and he suddenly became hyper-aware of something new. It was like a sixth sense, feeling the confusion that emitted from Sonic’s fur in waves as if it was his own. “What did you do?!” Shadow snarled. or, eggman accidentally soulbinds shadow and sonic, and no one has any idea how to undo it.

Sleepwalking by Tirainy

Words: 22,117 | Complete

'There is a strong arm curled around his torso, the appendage keeping him close to its owner, whose warm breath is ghosting over the back of his neck. Sonic is sure he went to bed alone the previous night, but he isn't worried about the intruder. After all, this isn't the first time this has happened…'

Secret Admirer by @trenchcoat-gecko

Words: 24,313 | Complete

Sonic understood well what it meant to be loved. He was a world-famous hero, after all; his presence never went unnoticed. For the most part, he lavished in that attention, he soaked it in and encouraged it. But not romantic attention. So, when the blue blur found himself falling in love? Well, the prospect was rather daunting, no matter how easy Amy had made it out to be. So maybe, just maybe, he should just take the easy way out...

Rose Drops Series by @magicstormfrostfire

Words: 122,489 | Series | Complete

Love, Intuition, and a little bit of magic ensues as Amy sends Sonic and Shadow on an unforgettable adventure.

Wolfboy by @trenchcoat-gecko

Words: 73,856 | Complete

World-famous monster hunter Shadow the Hedgehog has a job to do. It doesn't take long for the one-shot wonder to realize that this job won't be as simple as he'd expected: a small town, rumors of a lone werewolf, and a handsome, green-eyed, chronically-injured casanova who manages to worm his way into Shadow's heart... What starts off as a simple job turns out to be something much more life-changing.

Blizzard Bedfellows by @magicstormfrostfire

Words: 21,294 | Complete

When a rare blizzard takes over the island, Sonic is on the run to make sure a certain angry loner is safe and sound. Y-you know, because...uh that's what heroes do.

We never met but can we have a cup of coffee or something? by @whitejungle

Words: 3,630 | Complete

It's been almost two months since Sonic lost someone he didn't even know, but he can't stop thinking about it.

Clean Slate by nottheweirdest

Words: 155,880 | Complete | Note: Squeal pending and I am cheering you on author!! Whatever you decide I am excited to support you!!

Shadow has lost himself before. He knows what it's like to straddle the line between reality and false memories, but this time, it’s Sonic whose memory has vanished. A premeditated set of circumstances and an accidental injury leave Sonic with no memory of who he is, his life, or more importantly, his painful history with Shadow. It’s up to Shadow to remind the hero who he is in the midst of a global outbreak. It’s a chance for redemption. It’s a chance to right the wrongs of the past. It’s a clean slate.

say i reckon (i love you, for a millisecond) by @redamancering

Words: 30,205 | Complete

There’s a hand on his shoulder, barely making contact. A red gauntlet glows around the wrist. Sonic blinks, the pain having evaporated so fast he feels almost weightless. “Shadow?” Shadow’s breathing heavily. “Problem.” The retrieval of the ancient tech Shadow (and Sonic, in tow) has been sent to uncover takes a turn for the worst. In this case, the “worst” means… becoming physically and inextricably linked to each other. For the foreseeable future. OR: Metaphysical handcuffs, and general gay buffoonery.

Judge my sins, not my feelings by yellothebeeloved

Words: 228,479 | Complete | Note: Possible one-shots pending from the author for the series, I am here to support you author!! What ever you decide I'm here for it!

Maybe he's not meant to touch. It's the newest excuse he thought of in hopes that he could prolong the game a little more; a careful ruse to enjoy the bittersweet torture of seeing the days pass them by, while he pretends he doesn't seek azure blue whenever he's restless. At first, all he wanted to do was watch: but now the desire to touch, to have, to affect is at a point where he's not sure whether reaching for Sonic would truly be fruitless. He wonders that especially when Sonic's eyes light up upon seeing him. When he corners Shadow, when he invades his space and he touches and takes and then excuses it by calling it a fight. Shadow truly wonders then: if only he was brave enough to reach out, what would his grip find? Loose stars or a battle-worn body? Standing up, he glances at Sonic again, whose eyes have now met his own. There's something heavy in the eye contact, something Shadow doesn't dare name. Neither of them say anything, and yet Sonic's eyes move away from him again, like they did. Shadow warps away, hiding from the stars once more.

Child of Prophecy by @trenchcoat-gecko

Words: 139,321 | Completed

On the night the Mobius Castle was ransacked, the Queen received a prophecy. “One of three will not cry; send him down the river, for you can only save your kingdom if he does not grow up royal.”

Coming Home by nottheweirdest

Words: 55,740 | Completed

Shadow's life has been full of mistakes, some worse than others, but admitting his unrequited feelings to Sonic tops the list. He's spent the better part of a decade ruminating on his regret and hiding from feelings he couldn't bear to face. He never thought he'd see Sonic again, and he told himself that was for the best. Until now. At the bequest of his former rival, and in an attempt to finally get closure, Shadow has returned to Central City. The reason? Sonic the Hedgehog is marrying Amy Rose. And Shadow is invited.

[deoidesign]

For my birthday... read my webcomic! It's literally free! (Unless you want books. Those are not free)

It's beautiful, it's gentle, it's funny, they're canonically t4t and gay... And it's about time traveling vampires solving supernatural mysteries!

I've spent thousands of hours writing and drawing it, and it's really good! I'm not biased!

It's on hiatus right now and coming back in 2 months, so it's the perfect time to get caught up

[mllenugget]

Hey remember when Baghera adopted Dapper like 8 months ago or did I make that up ? ────────────────────────────────────────── Support all the admins that spoke out (& do your daily click) ──────────────────────────────────────────

[fandom-geek]

ngl i've been kinda surprised by the lack of veilguard stuff i've seen on my dash since it released - i've very thoroughly given up on it, but even ppl who seemed hyped about it have largely just... not been posting abt veilguard at all.

then i looked in the da critical tag and, uh, yeah. i can understand why. it's not an actively bad game, but it sounds to be very... shallow and mcu-ified? i'll admit i had basically given up on veilguard, but i did kinda want bioware to prove me wrong. not that i would've bought it anyway given the way they've treated their company veterans. it's just such a shame.

[gabbingwaves]

Jiyan's most dire foe yet: A sapient bubble.