#not me shitting on ppl who write these characters in the slightest.

[gay-dorito-dust]

YOOO I SEE U FELLOW UNUS ANUSER🫵🫵 i fucking love ur works keep at it bestie pls feed our delusions😫😫

may i ask for, dan heng, blade and jing yuan with a sweet and kind s/o but the moment theyre (the characters) are talked to in a disrespectful way, s/o is immediately turning into a guard dog with a “i’ll tear out your guts with my hand showed down your throat”? idk i just love feral but also gentle s/o tropes so much��

Thank you 🫵 my fellow Unus Anuser for the ask and enjoying my writings, despite me thinking half of them could be better but I’m not going to complain if ppl enjoy them regardless.

Dan Heng:

He’s taken aback by your sudden threats of violence towards a random pedestrian for intentionally bumping into him.

He was more use to Caelus rummaging through trash cans before waxing poetry about them and whenever March 7th going off on her own as it was expected of their characters.

You however? His sweetheart, his precious jewel and beloved partner? It was extremely unexpected. Dan Heng had to physically stop you from actually fulfilling your threat by holding you against him before putting a good deal of distance between you and the rude individual.

He’s not against you defending his honour, he just doesn’t want you engaging in fights with random people just because they said something about him that you didn’t like. He didn’t want you to stoop to their level and become like them, no matter how good your reasonings for doing so may be. Dan Heng just wants you to be better than them and not give them the reaction that they needed to fuel their own narratives.

That and Dan Heng knew that you could easily kick their ass but he didn’t felt like dealing with being chased by the authorities for unprovoked acts of violence. However some exceptions can be made to this but Dan Heng would much rather that you kept out of trouble, just for his sake and his sanity as he didn’t want to make breaking you out of jail a reoccurring thing.

Jing Yuan:

His interest is peaked.

Who’d knew that someone as sweet and kind as you had such a vicious side, waiting to come out.

Jing Yuan didn’t care for much what others said about him, but having you come to his defence without hesitation had him smiling with pride. His reputation precedes him wherever he went, so naturally he wasn’t going to be easily intimidated by senseless yapping of others, especially those who had not even the slightest clue of the things he’s put himself through in order to get where he was.

While Jing Yuan appreciates your need to stick up for him, he didn’t think it was necessary for you to waste your time and energy on those who lack the capacity to listen to a voice that wasn’t their own.

‘Always pick your battles wisely my dear,’ he said all the while looking at the person who insulted him dead in the eye with that half asleep expression of his, ‘for most aren’t worth fighting in.’ He finishes before gently pulling you by the waist and walking away.

Blade:

He had an inkling that there was more to you than meets the eye. However he didn’t expect someone who went out of their way to feed stray kittens and puppies, patch up his wounds despite knowing he could heal, would ever spout such detailed threats towards another person.

He didn’t give two shits about what people said about him that he hasn’t heard before, he had long grown immune to ignore the comments from those who didn’t know him nor his past. Yet he couldn’t help but revel in the look of surprise on the persons face the words left your lips, chuckling softly at the countless possible thoughts that must be running through their head in that moment.

It was always the sweetest people that everyone was the least suspicious about, it was near enough impossible to fathom that they were capable of hurting anyone.

A wolf in sheep’s clothing is what described you best in this moment as Blade watched you with new found interest. He found this side of you rather exciting and wanted nothing more than to help you hone in on this side of you and use it to your advantage; Yet he found another part of himself wanting to be the one inciting violence, as he refuses you to tread the same path he did, he wouldn’t allow it.

After all he was the weapon.

He was the one stained in the blood of others.

He was the one that inflicted pain onto others and himself and it was something he will continue to do until death was finally granted to him in whatever form that may be. Blade will refuse you from ever embracing that side of yourself if it meant sending you on a projectory much like his own.

You were his light in the dark for a reason and while it was reassuring to know that you had what it took to fight back, Blade would much rather be the one to fight instead and to be the one to keep your hands clean of blood and violence overall.

[ironunderstands]

AAAAAAAAA

Genuinely I feel annoying as fuck for saying this but like I can’t stand the way anybody else but me or my mutuals writes Aventio/Ratiorine 90% of the time

So, to vent my frustration, here’s a not in order at all bulleted list of stuff I absolutely despise when seeing content of them. This is not to call ppl out or anything, I just wanna rant about my preferences lol

oh and cw: mentions of slavery, nsfw, suicidal tendencies and non-con

-one or both of them being way to horny/flirty

Maybe this could work in content with an established relationship, but like, these guys don’t fuck, I’m sorry, they don’t. They are the biggest virgin losers ever regardless of if they have had sex in the past or not. Some of yall don’t get that they were acting in Penacony for the most part and Aventurine’s flirtiness didn’t have any weight behind it, he was really just messing with Ratio. I think if he were seriously trying to court Ratio, he’d probably be LESS flirty, but that’s just me. I understand why people make nsfw of them without any kinda buildup because well it’s fun, but for me personally I don’t really like it 90% of the time, however I fully get this is a me thing. I can tolerate it more in fanart bc well it’s fanart so yeah there’s not gonna be 3000k words of lore behind it, but like if I’m reading a fic and Aventio go from not even being in a relationship to having sex on a whim it just confuses me.

-yandere anything

I despise this trope already but it makes me 100000x more annoyed because holy shit neither of them would be a yandere I get it some people like this but WHYY THEMMM it doesn’t make sense. Yandere Aventurine makes me even more mad bc why the fuck would he make someone suffer like he did when he was younger???

-emotionless Ratio

Idk why half the community treats Ratio like he’s an unfeeling logic robot who’s sole goal is knowledge even when the game beats you over the head about how he’s the exact fucking opposite of that, but honestly I think this is just a symptom of the fact that a lot of ratiorine writers don’t give two fucks about him at all and he’s practically written as a plot device for Aventurine’s characterization.

-misunderstanding why Ratio is a tsundere

I’ve seen a lot of people misinterpret how and why Ratio is a tsundere towards Aventurine, citing it as if he doesn’t want to be associated with him/looks down upon him/is ashamed to like him when that’s really not true at all. Ratio respects and cares about Aventurine a hell of a lot, and he isn’t shy at all to show it when it’s necessary (see DSAIWYTBOL or the “if you can’t hold on any longer then tell me”). However, the reason he pushes away Aventurine isn’t exactly personal (although Aventurine’s closeness to him is part of the reason why).

Rather, Ratio tends to downplay his close relationships a lot, likely as a defense mechanism, as he admits himself that he isn’t good with people in one of the dialogue options with trailblazer for the express visits. Now why he is this way is a subject of speculation because Ratio rarely ever talks about himself, and the only character who actually has a voiceline on him is Aventurine himself, so it’s very hard to get an outside perspective on him. His character stories don’t really help that much either, as they are more about his personal philosophy and journey in life rather than his personality.

However, taking what Ratio says towards Aventurine at face value when he has proven the opposite (especially considering how the trope of the tsundere is kinda centered on the character in question spouting bullshit) results in people completely misunderstanding their relationship which can get REALLY annoying. Ratio doesn’t think Aventurine is an idiot in the slightest, he just worries about how his methods put himself in danger, not his capabilities.

-fast burn

You’re telling me these emotionally constipated idiots will get together easily? No. There’s a reason I write the most crazy bullshit happening to them before a confession scene and that’s because that’s the only way you can get them to confront their goddamn feelings quickly.

-slavery aus/anything like this

Self explanatory. If you have fetishized Aventurine’s past or made stuff like this please stay 1000 feet away from me at all times or block me. Thank you 🙏

-babying Aventurine

He’s one of the most competent members of the cast, but somehow people act like his breakdown scene in 2.1 is how he behaves 24/7 when that isn’t true at all. Aventurine is incredibly smart, and single-handedly clawed his way to the top. He does not need Ratio to save him. Would he appreciate Ratio’s support? Of course, and he definitely needs loving relationships in his life, but Aventurine isn’t a damsel in distress and not everything in his life is miserable and related to his trauma.

-or the horrible reverse of babying Aventurine: his trauma doesn’t exist actually and he’s perfectly fine/ they write him like it never happened

This one is rather rare and it has overlap with a few of the other points (seriously I’m gonna tweak out the next time someone writes the character who is implied to have survived sex trafficking being a person who would even dream of crossing others boundaries). Usually this happens because people treat Aventurine’s playboy mask as if it’s his actual personality and not traits he picked up to survive and succeed at his goals, and while admittedly even Aventurine is losing track of where the mask ends and he begins, some of y’all take it wayy to far even going on to unironically call him a fuckboy when he’s anything but that. The thing is, I think this happens when people erase who Kakavasha is from their minds, and act as if that side of Aventurine is a purely innocent child and all the “bad” parts of him are part of Aventurine’s mask. However, that’s not true, and Aventurine’s most admirable traits ARE Kakavasha’s. His strategicness, his intellegence, his bravery, these are all traits he possessed long before becoming Aventurine of stratagems, something which he demonstrated when he for example got his sisters neckless back, or made that bet with his first enslaver.

Aventurine’s purity and Aventurine’s capabilities are not separated between Kakavasha and Aventurine of Stratagems, both of those qualities ARE Kakavasha’s so if you are going to write him with the mask off, you have to write BOTH, not give into one or the other.

The things I tend to drop when writing him with the mask off are his false compliments and niceties, acting like he really gives a shit about the IPC’s goals, turning down the flamboyance and cockiness to reasonable levels and making him seem less like he’s playing pretend. Honestly I don’t think it’s that hard yet this is still a pitfall I see a lot of people stumbling into.

-Ratio talking like a goddamn encyclopedia

I understand he’s like that sometimes, but he also is well versed in internet lingo and seriously nobody unironically talks like that 24/7 because it’s pointless, and Ratio doesn’t use big words to seem smart, he uses them when they are necessary.

Like I’m sorry but if they are in a middle of having sex and unprompted Ratio starts talking like a biology textbook I’m closing the fic and running around my room screaming BECAUSE GOD IS IT CRINGE. Promoted it can be funny because yeah I can see him doing that but oh my god HE WOULD NOT SAY THAT I don’t even want to give an example it pisses me off that bad but trust me it’s a common phenomenon AND I HATE IT

-Aventurine trying to kill himself 24/7

He isn’t an active suicide risk every goddamn day of his life, he’s just self destructive and those are TWO DIFFERENT THINGS.

Yes, he tested if you could die in the dreamscape several times, but that’s because one of the favorable outcomes for his mission WOULD BE DYING in the dreamscape. He’s not doing this during a normal work week and even if I believe he still has suicidal tendencies, he’s not gonna throw his life away randomly or over nothing

-Ratio holds authority over Aventurine in any capacity

No, just no. Like the only other thing he might have over him is being intelligent, although they both are smart at different things so even then does it matter? Like I’m sorry but normal human with the ability to float and make imaginary constructs versus LITERAL FUCKING STONEHEART is not a fair fight on Ratio’s end. It doesn’t matter that he’s physically larger than Aventurine, muscles don’t mean shit in a sci-fi setting, especially when your opponent can just summon 3 bajillion coins to drop into your head at a whim and there’s nothing you can do about it. Not like Aventurine would ever dream of hurting him, of course, but seriously people need to stop acting like their different in stature really means anything. Even in terms of position, Aventurine probably outranks him so this false sense of authority people apply to Ratio in their relationship is confusing at best.

Hmm, well that’s all the things I remember to bitch about although I probably have more complaints. To be fair, whenever they aren’t written like incredibly smart people who are idiots hopelessly in love with one another when together I pop a blood vessel so most of these (besides THAT one) are non issues and if you have made/enjoyed these don’t feel ashamed because of my opinions. I needed to let out my inner grinch every once and awhile, so thanks for reading

[bronzetomatoes]

Im gonna be honest it bothers me quite a bit when ppl act like dream did fuck all forever and was only popular bc of other ppl, like yeah no it's true that he didnt come up w some of his shit (and it's scummy that he refuses to give credit) but like you can't deny that the manhunts were well made and he's good at the game and he was a decent-to-good actor who, despite not streaming and his FREQUENT and unprofessional and often just fucking rude miscommunication issues, still contributed a lot more to the dsmp than some of the other ppl

All this is not to defend him in the slightest (I still think he puts zero fucking effort into current projects as a by-product of drifting through success using the work of other dsmp members) I just fucking hate the trend of pretending someone is utterly untalented once they're revealed to be a bad person. Much like good people can make bad art, many many many bad people create good art and the idea that as soon as someone is irredeemable then their work is reduced to "he played a weak ass villain character who never streamed" is (not only incredibly reductive of the stories written around that character, but also) a really weird line of thinking that can get you into some tricky bullshit. Because yes he did a lot of good on the dsmp but that has absolutely nothing to do w the fact that he's a nasty ass creep

Like your takeaway shouldn't be "yeah he didn't even contribute shit to the community he was only there in name, we never liked him" because bro some of us DID like him. We liked his videos and his character and thought he was talented and none of that made it any more difficult to drop his disgusting ass once we heard he was sexting fans!!! And saying he contributed nothing is so easily disproven that it feels off, like you need to pretend he's irrelevant in order to write him off. Dream wasn't irrelevant, but he needs to be written off all the same

[moonystoast1971]

HI IM PISSED OFF AND HERE TO TALK SHIT ABOUT TOXIC MARAUDERS STANS

so i saw a "hot take" it was the coldest shit ever like girlie my fridge is broken rn pls bring ur opinions this way

basically they were mad that the marauders fandom now has more characters in it (the characters they named: pandora dorcas evan barty) and that it was now less about james sirius and remus but more about "ocs" and want to bring it back to the early 2000s

TW!!!!!!!!!!: talks about racisim, colourism, sexual harrassment, homophobia, fat phobia, lesbophobia, general toxicisity, sexism, shitty beauty standards

lets evaluate ur early 2000s:

-two ships only ever written about and they were both toxic: jily and wolfstar lets talk about that for a second: Jily was only ever written in a way that was litterally sexual harrassment! you had james sexually harrassing lily every five minutes but called it romantic. you had this girl subjected to years of humiliation and sexual harrassment - THAT STARTED AT AGE 11 AND WENT ALL THE WAY TO AGE 17! like u were telling us how cute it was to be pressured into romance. THE LOVELYYYYYY EARLY 2000S <333333333 next we have wolfstar which was litterally gays for straight ppl, remus was ur tortured little broken boy who treated sirius like literal shit- this man treated sirius as if he was an annoying ass burden, he could never do anything good, he was always treated as if his presence was killing remus. but its fine they were aestheticly pleasing and the straight girls loved to read about them. sirius and remus were ur trauma porn gays written for straights. lily and james were ur sexual harrassment turned love affair romance for the toxic love girlies.

-all ur characters were white: james occasionally got to be desi but that was fucking rare, all ur characters were skinny white ppl. if james was written as desi itd be one quick "cholatey skin" (seriously why were you out here describing his skin as food???????? none of the 4385853959 billion white ppl got that treatment) dorcas and mary eventually got thrown in but of course OF FUCKING COURSE ya'll still had mary as miss lily collins miss emily from paris and dorcas as light skin when she was dark skinned (your colourisms showing babes - dark skin girls are beautiful, don't forget that) but no yall had her as miss zoe kravits well knowing she was dark skin

-your over glorification of male characters and complete ignorance to the female characters:

Tell me why james sirius remus and snape (never peter) all got these in depth stories, all got to have feelings that got explained, lives that had meaning but lily evans was a pawn in her own love story? was used as a plot device? as personal growth for not one BUT TWO MEN she wasn't a person to ya'll she was james and snapes character development. mary and dorcas got added in and were given the personality of fucking sticks on the ground. you treated these women as if they were plot points to further the lives of men AND NOW UR COMPLAINING WE'VE GIVEN THEM PROPER PERSONALITIES?????? my brothers in christ ur sexism is showing, better cover up.

-UR TOXIC ASS BODY STANDARDS (oml this one drives me up the fucking wall):

you will be genuinely SHOCKED how many early 2000s marauders fics i've read where the second its revealed peter betrayed them he's being called fat and ugly and horrible names about his weight. james remus and sirius were these perfect little pretty boys who were basically described as gods while peter was described as ugly and surprisingly (no it fucking wasnt surprising in the slightest) fat THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH PLUS SIZE BODIES so why was that how you described him? always just "fat and ugly" what the fuck? STOP DEMONISING PLUS SIZE BODIES

-ur antisemitism: Snape was ur bad guy, so of course your "amazing" writing "talents" had to talk about how ugly he was but snape wasn't plus sized so ya'll couldn't call him fat, OH BUT LOOK GUYS HE STILL HAS A BODY PART WE CAN INSULT TO MAKE THE MARAUDERS LOOK EVEN BETTER THAN HIM!!!!!!! HIS NOSE!!!!!!! sitting here writing fucking paragraphs describing this man and always going back to his "big ugly nose" "ginormous nose" u may not like it but ur an antisemitic. you're talking about a jewish mans nose and describing it in ways to make it sound hideous JUST TO GLORIFY UR BORING ASS WHITE MEN! why was his nose the marauders favourite insult?

-ur general homophobia:

as i said earlier: WOLFSTAR WAS GAYS WRITTEN FOR STRAIGHT GIRLS TO TWIRL THEIR HAIR ABOUT

those were ur only queer characters. james was straight, peter was straight (tho some of yall mfs [2000s remadora shippers] were out here making peter the only queer character so it just worked so well when he was ur bad guy) snape was straight, lily was straight (not that it mattered bc the girl barely had a personality) the fandom was just a bunch of overly glorified straight assholes with their two gay friends who hold hands to make the straight girls horny. eventually marlene and dorcas were thrown in to apease the lesbians but all they did was come by holding hands and say hi to ur precious white men and never speak again

LETS TAKE A LOOK AT THE FANDOM NOWADAYS:

female characters are actually treated like important characters NOT JUST PLOT DEVICES (wow who knew that was something we could do 😲😲😲)

queer characters are written properly they aren't just jerk off material for straight girls

the characters arent just fucking white men and when they arent white their culture is actually fucking mentioned it isnt just a throw in to appease ppl

the characters just have more fucking personality tbh

body types are celebrated not demonised

there are so many different ships which allows representation for so many different people

NON CISGENDERED CHARACTERS!!!!!

redemption for characters that were literal children in that war (these kids were raised in households brainwashed and abused to fight in a war they were too young to even understand properly)

honestly our stories r just fucking better

QUEER SHIPS WRITTEN FOR AND BY QUEER PEOPLE!!

now last thing i wanna talk about is the added characters and the redemptions for certain characters: literally all i want to say is if u dont fucking like seeing other characters being given roles in it DONT PRESS THE FANFICS WITH THEIR NAMES TAGGED theres this special button in ao3 which allows u to exclude certain things - exclude their names if ur small brain cant see that these were literal children who were being manipulated into their ways and if ur tiny little brain cant handle so many names

please feel free to agrue with me in the comments babes id love to hear ur shitty ass old ass out dated ass opinions <33333

[niofo]

a trope i was thinking i need to write more of:

character a has a reputation of being sneaky underhanded traitor with no loyalties whatsoever, someone who would jump the ships at the slightest signs of trouble, but also they are a very capable person, so while ppl grumble when that they joined the good guys for personal benefit, they let it slide.

character b, their boss, is this prince charming trope, just an ideal example of how the good guy should be, but for some reason they have absolute trust in a's loyalty. they're actually the only person confident that a won't betray them.

and a going of on a lot of infiltrating missions, relying on the fact that they're wiedly considered a traitor. they join the bad guys claiming that the good guys totally lost, let me help you now - but in reality they're doing an incredibly risky and sensitive mission for b, in which one false step would get them killed immediately. a pulling the wildest shit using just their opinion as a traitor. a bluffing to the bad guys that the good guys totally have full advantage, do you think that i would side with b if they weren't an obvious winner in this? but in reality they're an inch from death and just bullshitting their way through the situation to buy their team enough time. their secret skill is talking circles around someone's point making everyone confused about their pretty straight-forward goal of helping b.

all in all, a being way more loyal person that anyone gives them credit for, and b being way more sneaking and underhanded in their tactics that everyone would expect of the good guy. they're just working so well as a team together, and absolutely trust in each other's abilities.

as a bonus point a starting to be more accepted and liked by their team due to their obvious shows of loyalty, but they don't know what to do with it bcos they are so used to being hated by everyone and they used the brand of a traitor like a shield to deflect human interactions.

[irrealisms]

every martyr in this jungle liner notes

fic here if you haven't read it!

okay so this first point is, like, barely a liner note for the fic proper. but did you know i have spent the past several weeks engrossed in the mcyt-trio polls. i have written two fics for it and made a web weave and i'm already planning a third fic for the finale next round as a thank you to the mods. shit's crazy. i rushed the editing timeline on every martyr in this jungle because i wanted to publish it before the time on this poll runs out. vote eclipse federation if you haven't already, with the disclaimer that it's got like 16 hours left as of me writing this, and keep an eye out for a bench trio fic coming soon to a blog and/or ao3 near you

anyway! fic time!

the most-used word in this fic that is not a name (the top three words are of course Vitalasy, Zam, and Subz) is again. this is on purpose. during editing i deleted an instance of "again" due to awkward phrasing and i had to double-check before doing so that it was still winning in Word Frequency or else i would've added it back in somewhere else. they have had this conversation before. maybe not in its details, but in its shape. they are having this conversation again, again, again.

vitalasy has so many issues around zam being afraid of him, even though (a) vitalasy hasn't actually done anything to anyone other than himself*, (b) zam is the one who killed vitalasy. some things i was drawing on for character inspiration here: the song hold no guns by death cab for cutie, the poem ON BEING RAISED ON FAIRY TALES IN WHICH YOU ARE THE MONSTER by a.m.h. *sorry for the planetlord erasure

zam...isn't actually as afraid of vitalasy as vitalasy thinks he is. zam is, like, a normal amount afraid of all social interaction, due to who he is as a person. he is an incredibly scared and jumpy guy, because he has an anxiety disorder, but he isn't actually particularly scared of vitalasy qua vitalasy anymore. vitalasy just...has issues from when he was.

relatedly: if this were from zam's pov, every time there is the slightest pause in the dialogue you'd get his internal monologue, which is approximately "oh God oh fuck this is going so terribly what do i say why am i so bad at talking to Vitalasy what do i do" the entire time. he's trying! and the tension on his end is much less "aaaa Vitalasy who I am scared of is here" and much more "WHY DO I KEEP SAYING THE WRONG THING. WHY AM I SO BAD AT THIS. OH NO HE'S EVEN SADDER NOW?????"

it did need to be vitalasy pov, though. as soon as i got the idea i knew it had to be vitalasy pov. i knew it had to be vitalasy pov because the previous one was zam pov and they're mirrors. here they are, at the grave, (again!) but now it's vitalasy standing vigil, and zam awkwardly showing up to put flowers on it.

the way it is still, constantly, about subz. vitalasy gets mad at zam for this, because zam cares so much more about subz than him, but he's just as bad--every two seconds he's thinking about subz's death, subz's note. the grave is the space between them. the grave is the only thing bringing them together. this is a bit of a continuation of the last fic. it is about zam and vitalasy but it is also about the ghost of subz.

the moon-representing-subz has Less of a presence in this one vs the last one, except for at the very end. the moon is rising. subz will be back soon. (well...it rises once zam leaves. this, too, is a metaphor.)

also related to the ghost of subz: i considered bringing up the fact that zam's been [hallucinating? haunted?] seeing subz everywhere. it didn't quite work but it's a fun little detail that is, btw, canon. canon in a "one-off line that was a little bit a joke" way but nonetheless canon enough to make me crazy about it.

the note about zam fidgeting a lot to the point of half-dancing around mapicc and spoke is about his lunar client emotes . and how he does them Even More Than Usual (which is already a lot) when he is around ppl who are also being silly w lunar client emotes <3

the thing where... they know each other. they know each other so well. they are, both of them, trying. this does not fix anything, it just makes it hurt worse.

sort of related to that and sort of related to zam's Fear (in general, of vitalasy) and sort of its own thing, zam is.. mm. zam's got certain expectations of people. and it's easy to assume they're about his [past issues in relationships] or even about [the person he is presently talking to] but they're...not, really. they're not zero about those things but they're not only about those things either. they are in large part about what zam, personally, thinks he deserves (punishment, death, bad things, etc). (occasionally when zam feels better about himself it's about how zam is a Victimhero Martyr and everyone else is a sort of prop in that, which vitalasy also has a huge complex about, but that's less relevant in this fic specifically than the...thinking he deserves for vitalasy to hurt him & on some level he wants vitalasy to hurt him as a weird self-harm-by-proxy thing & therefore vitalasy is probably going to hurt him)

the song the title comes from is Estate Sale Sign by the Mountain Goats. it's one of my #1 eclipse federation songs, tbh it's also one of my #1 s4 zam songs in general--i also am fond of it for team awesome. the title, though--that's all eclipse fed. they are all martyring themselves. they have all either banned themselves off or seriously considered it. they remember loving each other and now they still love each other but they are giving away that love. mm. [i remember when we loved each other day and night//and high above the water/the eagle spots the fish/every martyr in this jungle/is gonna get his wish]....man. also thinking about ["This is a song about, um, you may find it necessary to get rid of all your stuff, at some point."] and vitalasy burning all his stuff before his suicide. that's less relevant to the fic, though.

the series title is really funny to me. credit to angel qfitmc on tumblr for making this joke on hyperbeam chat and me cracking up every time i remember it. the thing is. while vitalasy and zam are being so fucking angsty and miserable about subz's suicide. subz IS playing dark souls. also elden ring. jump king. etc. bro killed himself in minecraft to become a variety streamer and i think that's beautiful. he's just chilling. this was of course epitomized when zam tried to bring him back but he was too busy playing dark souls and so he just Didn't. point is you don't have to stand at his grave and weep he is LITERALLY doing a pokemon nuzlocke run right now on twitch dot tv. unfortunately this is not stopping these two. from standing at his grave. and weeping

[wyslyyzr]

btw! i need to make this obvious because ive definitely gotten vagued for it before and unfollowed: 

me not liking a character doesnt mean i dislike your blog or portrayal. i can think a canon character is a scum bag but still want to write with you or like the way you write them. i prommy i can detach enough not to insult you, and i dont really bitch much about characters i dislike anymore anyway unless theyre like.... openly nazis.... like the von struckers and sinister..

in the same vein, erik disliking someone doesnt mean i dislike that character, and it ESPECIALLY doesnt mean i dislike you. erik kinda fucking hates @sebastianshaw and i hate the modern takes on shaw wrt his dynamic with emma, but i adore rf and love watching them interact. 

[ijustreallylikecaptainamericaok]

why do ppl not want steve's bday to be july 4? i've seen that before and wondered why ppl were so insistent about it

I dunno, dude. I just know that it gives me the vibes of those internet ~~theories~~ that try to make a children's cartoon out to be darker and more twisted than it actually is and that fall apart under the slightest scrutiny, like the one that claims Rugrats was some trauma induced delusion on Angelica's part. Maybe not full blown edgelord shit, in this particular case, but certainly edgelord adjacent.

Like it can't just be that a past Cap writer was like, "Hey, given that the mantle is Captain America, Steve's birthday should totally be July 4th, lolololol." No, can't be that. It has to be "akshually his birthday was changed for propaganda reasons yadda yadda and of course, the only one who can possibly know the truth is dear wittle B-cky because he knows him better than anyone ever possibly could, blah blah fucking blah." Because if I've learned anything from this fandom it's that anything and everything in Steve's orbit must a) be dreary as all hell (and if it isn’t, the fandom will make it so) and b) prop up other characters (usually B-rnes) at all times.

Seriously, how does this benefit Steve, his character, or his arc in anyway? Does it add anything new? No! It does nothing for him, because it isn’t meant to, frankly. Neither that headcanon nor the recent retcon have anything to do with Steve. It’s about B-cky. Not even Steve’s birthday gets to be about Steve and that’s annoying as hell.

Also annoying? And this could just be me, but I hate that this was retconned in such a derisive tone by a writing team that’s doing an actually-this-secret-society-has-been-the-pulling-the-world’s-strings-this-whole-time plot. As if Marvel hasn’t been banging the conspiracy drum every three-to-five business days and twice on Sunday.

Sorry, but I’ll take on-the-nose goofy shit over this dull nonsense any day.

[wooahaes]

writing thoughts ig

i think whenever i write my fics, i usually do try to like... ask myself what kind of story i want to tell and what kind of like... reader/mc i would use to tell that story? i think most of the time i try to go gender-neutral with my mcs so that people can project onto them.

like... under the sun deals with identity, but more in a sense of the way that you define yourself based on past and present experiences. i dont see that as something i need to gender in the slightest. the period comfort vernon fic, acts of service, isnt gendered either--there’s just a warning that reader does have a uterus because.. it’s a period comfort fic. not everyone w periods is female. i could have done the same with one word at a time (dad!wonwoo fic) but i think i projected more onto that one with some thoughts and fears about being a mom one day.

like obviously all my birthday fics from this year are gendered because i wrote them specifically for my birthday. i didnt have to, but they were mainly for me and i just shared em for funsies.

the flowers fics were all gender-neutral bc idk i think everyone deserves to get flowers + i didnt really have a reason to gender them.

lonely hearts club was specifically me, a chubby woman, writing a fic that doesnt center on a chubby mc and her weight + me wanting to write a chubby woman being actively pined for and loved bc of who she is as a person. no weird caveats based on weight. both tiger strips + beach body are also chubby!fem!reader because the fat experience does differ depending on the way you present yourself.  people who are perceived as women tend to get a lot more shit when it comes to the idea of “making up” for being fat. people who get perceived as men will get shit, too, but its usually in a different vein. i won’t go too much into it, but there’s a reason why i gender my chubby!reader fics and it is primarily bc of that difference.

i think while i do prefer and try to write fics where the reader is inclusive, sometimes i want to write a story for people like me tbh? even if people don’t always read them (lhc has very low interaction on it, specifically--so does beach body, but tiger stripes has decent engagement compared to them), i still think its important to write fics for people like me ig? i like making people happy.

i also like proving you can write a fic catered more toward fat ppl without making the entire plot “i hate my body sooo much im so ugly and fat no one will ever like me because im not skinny :(” and having the love interest go “babe ur pretty” and have that fix all their issues. self esteem can absolutely be a topic of conversation because i was talking with some friends the other day about the way weight gets handled in media (mainly on the topic of weight loss) and fatphobia itself. we kinda talked about a (shitty, according to a lot of ppl) anime adaptation of something where one character gets called fat and proceeds to essentially starve himself + overexercise until hes skinny and then he gets to be happy and confident and “earn” a friend. or media where a characters weight is constantly made fun of the entire time, even if they lose it--it’s constantly used to degrade them or for cheap laughs.

i think the topic of self esteem could be fully approached in writing in general. its not an issue exclusive to fat people, sure, but i think people forget that hating yourself wont just go away because one person loves you--especially if it goes deep. it gets tiring to read chubby!reader fics when so many of them feature a reader who is also depressed and hates themself, especially when it’s just waved away when reader receives love. having supportive people in your life can help, sure, but it doesn’t just... cure it. that’s the shit that happens in badly written romance movies that are definitely written by people who don’t know what it’s like to legit hate yourself and/or the way you look. loving yourself is a hard journey for everyone.

anyway im getting rambley so ill shut up now sdkfhdsf just know i like writing inclusive fic but when i get exclusive its bc thats the way i want to tell a story? lonely hearts club wouldn’t have worked the same way imo had i imagined a skinny reader by default. it would have touched on self-love in a different way + reader’s fears about pursuing ww would have been rooted a little differently. UtS reader outright being a fem!reader would have shifted the dynamic a lot  and probably touched more on how it feels to basically feel being the sole female among a large group of men and also it probably would have looked even more similar to m*ze r*nner. reader wouldn’t have been treated any differently imo but “last 14 ppl on earth who care for one another” is still at the core of it, but it would have definitely maybe pulled away from skinship a bit more to begin with before they’d all kinda go “fuck it, everyone needs physical comfort sometimes, we’ll just stay mindful of whats crossing a line with u” or w/e

[bakugouisabitch]

i never wanted to use tumblr as something like a journal but i’m writing this to let my thoughts out cause keeping them bottled up isn’t doing me any good as it’s currently 5am and i’m in tears

Yesterday was my last day of a two week vacation i managed to get for myself in which i decided to not travel anywhere and spend all of my 14 days at home to dedicate myself into creating “content” for this fandom. As it turns out during the first week i managed to update an old fic and i managed to do some sketches as well but - unfortunately as it turns out, most of the time of my wasted vacation i spent just despairing for myself and lying awake at night . wondering what am i doing wrong because of the total LACK of reaction i got everywhere. Ik fandom is not everything in life but i like to see it as a little place where you can hide and dive-in when real world gets too much. After you’ve “touched some grass” you like to come home to something sheltering and - like in ygo’s case - even something reminding me of childhood. This fandom didn’t allow me to feel like that. I can genuinely feel how nobody CARES if my presence is even there or not. I can see how no one gives a fuck if i am gonna contribute somewhere or not or how little attention they pay whether i am around or not. Just a general LACK of care - even the slightest form of approach would have sufficed but there was barely any - has been making me feel depressed. It’s making me feel like i’m the stupid nerd at school who gets laughed at because i’m so invested into something while everyone else is just here for shit and giggles and taking the piss of the characters/shows i like. If i start writing something resourceful, meta/hcs abt the show/character, no one bats an eyelid. Unless you’re not ironic to some degree or you don’t approve of old hcs/thoughts that have been shared far too many times already, you’ll only hear crickets. This fandoms sucks. And I know i’m sounding like a complete idiot making a post like this but i don’t have much left to lose. No one is going to care anyway might as well pour it out so THANK YOU for proving to me that all my work sucks and no, you can’t convince me otherwise atp. THANK YOU for removing any form of motivation in me to carry on with any of my ongoing projects. And THANK YOU for making me waste my vacation for nothing. That was really helpful for my mental state. As if i didn’t feel like time is slipping from my hands already, I will be going back to work fully motivated for sure now. 🙂🔫

I’m sorry for those 2/3 ppl who cared abt a continuation of any of my projects i’m abandoning but i’m really forcing myself to get invested into other stuff because this is really slowly depressing me. And it’s not good for me. And sorry for sounding so dramatic. If you won’t hear of me at least you know why.

[dazais-guardian-angel]

Hot take: Bakugou's character wouldn't survive if not for the one he kept abusing all his life. 90% of his character revolves around his victim and yet the fandom paints him as this super developed, fleshed out character when in reality he'd never be anything bigger than a side character if not for Deku.

Also the concequences he supposedly received are just him being teased or not getting the win he wanted, no being kidnapped doesn't count, he literally got away with his shit while even been treated like a victim and the privilege to know something about Deku that isn't any of his business. And now because he sacrificed himself that one time the fandom acts like Izuku owes his ass anything. It's disgusting.

I have given up on him actually being half the decent character ppl make him out to be and the fandom reaction to him makes me hate him even more.

He's not complex, he's just a pretty boy, asshole archetype who gets nicer and has some more cooperative and ppl love to eat that shit up while making up stuff for him. He changes but he's doesn't change for what matters and definitely pales in comparison to other characters who are better written than him.

(holy shit, did they remove the character limit on asks?? omg a GODSEND)

Well yeah, if it weren’t for Izuku and how he treats Izuku he wouldn’t have anything to improve from; people only think he’s developed because he no longer outright bullies him and “””worries””” (I say in heavy quotes) about him, and “reflects” on how he treated him even though he.......... comes to the absolute wrongest, most idiotic conclusions imaginable, that put the brunt of the excuses on Izuku instead of himself, but Toshinori validates him because Horikoshi has made Toshi into Bakugou’s uwu stan and stan of the two boys’ “friendship” (completely ignoring the fact that THIS KID FOR TEN YEARS BULLIED HIS SON). He’s basically already been devolved to acting like a side character for a long time now, with his funny anger quirk pun partly intended that’s just treated like a joke at this point, just like everyone else’s character quirks, even though it would be far more interesting for him to, you know. actually get some therapy and learn to calm himself and become an actual pleasant person to be around. But that’s not what makes him “funny”, that’s not him, according to most people, so he’s always going to stay like this, a boring angry pomeranian who flies off the handle at everything for no reason, who has done the absolute bare minimum of “changing”, which makes him a perfect character in everyone’s eyes.

“He changes but doesn’t change for what matters” pretty much sums up the problem with him in a nutshell, and is the exact reason he frustrates me so much, that I’ve ranted about plenty before. Bakugou has never been viewed through the lens of a bully, an abuser, he was never set up to be that, at least not realistically, and so his development hasn’t happened in accordance with that setup either, and people don’t have a problem with it and actively praise it because the manga actively downplay(ed)s the severity of that origin story. People can ignore the reality of how seriously traumatic being bullied for ten years of your childhood, verbally and physically would be, and how seriously and with such sensitivity such a relationship and character arc must be handled, because aside from the very first chapter when Izuku and Bakugou are still in middle school, really, with the “take a swan dive off the roof” comment and others, it’s never focused on in that way ever again; ever since, it’s just been treated as a typical anime “rivalry”, that both of them need to better themselves to overcome. The story and teachers say “the two of them are so alike but they just keep missing each other; if they just made up for each others’ weaknesses and understood that they both want the same thing, they’d be stronger together!”, and Izuku HIMSELF tries so hard to reach through to Bakugou, always still considering him his friend, always feeling like he’s the one equally at fault for their relationship being as rocky as it is, when BAKUGOU!!! FUCKING!!! BULLIED HIM!!! FOR TEN YEARS. bullied a DISABLED CHILD, which again, as a disabled person who relates to Izuku and how he felt about his quirklessness, feelings that continue to affect him even long after he gets a quirk because of how he was treated when he was younger, is DEEPLY unsettling to me. You CANNOT read/watch MHA without the metaphor of quirklessness = disabled being very apparent, and so that makes Bakugou’s bullying and how it is so utterly glossed over and purposefully forgotten a hundred times more disturbing and aggravating than it already is! If this were any other shounen rivalry then yes, it could be resolved with effort from both parties, because both parties have their own personal reasons for why they have trouble getting along with the other, and the fun is watching to see how they will overcome those, but Izuku and Bakugou were never on an equal playing field to begin with; this is a bullying story, with its victim trying desperately to win over and befriend his abuser, when he owes him absolutely NOTHING and has a BOATLOAD of unresolved issues thanks to said bullying, with no outside help from adults for either of them because none of them are acknowledging it as fucking bullying. I guarantee you that if the manga went into much more painful, bleak detail and showed many more flashbacks of how Izuku was treated by Bakugou in the past, and then still continued with the “development” he’s had since, people would be unable to ignore it like they can now, and it would make all of them extremely uncomfortable like it does those of us now who already dislike him. Hori himself has said he doesn’t understand why Bakugou is so popular, but he’s able to just continue as he does with him because no one is complaining, and because he said he regrets making him so awful in the beginning, as if that magically makes it disappear as much as it already has in 90% of the fandom’s collective mind. You wanna know an actual good manga that also deals with a bully of a disabled child growing and improving himself and forming a close relationship with his former victim? A Silent Voice. Such a journey is long, and hard, and it is painful, with many ups and downs and many nasty, hateful, guilt-filled, depression-filled feelings from both sides, along with from other characters who either also partook in the bullying, were bystanders to it who did nothing, or were indirect victims as well. The bully is bullied himself after what he does, and then grows up nearly suicidal, closing himself off and struggling to be social and make new friends because he doesn’t know how and doesn’t entirely feel like he deserves it (and the story notably doesn’t go the route of “he was abused too at home and so that’s why he bullied”), and tries and fails many times to make amends with the person he hurt before he finally is at peace with himself and everyone; the victim, meanwhile, drowns in continued guilt and suicidal feelings over feeling like she’s a burden to others, both from her disability and from watching all the infighting and victim blaming and finger pointing that ensues between her old classmates when all of the nasty emotions are brought back to the surface, along with dealing with budding romantic feelings for her past bully when he genuinely starts being kind towards her and making an effort to connect with her. ASV is entirely about this complex narrative, it’s able to dedicate everything it has to telling this story tactfully and with all the time and attention it needs. MHA, meanwhile, is a shounen battle manga, and so it was never going to do this narrative and Bakugou’s arc justice, even though I honestly think it could have if Hori really wanted to, because Izuku and Toshinori’s relationship has such masterfully subtle and touching emotions and care, at least early on; Horikoshi knows how to write good, subtle character arcs. I’m not asking for something ASV level, of course not, when the series has so many other things it has to juggle. I just wanted Bakugou to be treated as exactly what he is: a former bully, who can be taught, and learn, and reflect, and change, and become a better, more humble, more interesting person, and actually become someone worthy of all the praise and love he gets, not only for Izuku’s sake, but for his own, as well. They don’t excuse his actions in the slightest, but it’s still undeniable that Bakugou himself is a victim of how the adults in his life have treated him and raised his own expectations of himself, giving him the crippling insecurity issues he has, and that they continue to harm him (and Izuku) by simply letting him continue to go on angrily the way he does, instead of getting him help and some therapy in order for him to change and heal from things like being kidnapped by villains (which is no small thing to go through!! on top of his guilt over Toshinori’s final battle!) and becoming a better person to the one he hurt in the past, and it all just makes me so sad, not because I’m all “uwu poor Bakugou”, but just cause his character deserves better, as a person he deserves better, just like Izuku deserves better than everything he’s gone through because of him. This is all just a very long-winded way of agreeing with you OP that yes, none of Bakugou’s “punishments” for his behavior mean anything because he’s punished as a rival student who needs to humble himself in order to get along with his friend he doesn’t like, not as a former(??) bully who needs to be separated from his victim. The bar is set so low, was never set where it should be, and so absolutely no progress to “better himself” Bakugou makes either will mean anything, as long as it’s never acknowledged that he needs to make amends as a bully and abuser.

[pugszler]

Bnha and/or bsd? For the ask game

aaand time for bsd! i am both ecstatic and mortified to talk aloud about these characters lmao 🙈 i'm putting this under a read more

blorbo (favorite character, character I think about the most)

okay let's just get this over with--it's akutagawa. he is also the answer to the rest of the following questions too okay post over /gen lmao

scrunkly (my “baby”, character that gives me cuteness aggression, character that is So Shaped)

ah. err. uh. hm... well, besides my obvious answer, i guess almost everyone in the show has at least a Little bit of "baby" energy lol... can i say kyouka? i mean this in the Not-weirdest way Possible. she's just rlly fucking adorable. also, alternative answer is karl the raccoon :>

scrimblo bimblo (underrated/underappreciated fave)

hm well i'm not too acquainted w/ the bsd fandom like even the slightest bit at all so idk exactly how (under)appreciated this character is but i kinda just have a feeling about it, but kunikida! i rlly like him and he makes me feel rlly happy in a way i don't quite understand yet... fuck man, i even kinda feel like i myself don't appreciate him enough! i need to focus on him more!

also i'm just gonna shout out odasaku here bc i Need to mention him somewhere on this post but idk where else to mention him lmao. i have a feeling he's a fandom favorite tho? ......i hope he is at least lmao. he should be a fan favorite.

glup shitto (obscure fave, character that can appear in the background for 0.2 seconds and I won’t shut up about it for a week)

gin, altho i kinda bet she's prob a big fave for a lot of ppl too. and idk if she gets to have any more significant plot relevance post-s3 of the anime?

also my memory of the actual serious plot of the series is extremely foggy in my head so excuse me if this is a bad answer but i get rlly excited when ango shows up... altho tbh it's mostly just bc i love it when his voice actor jun fukuyama gets to voice meek-looking megane characters lmao. i know that ango does some major shit but i honestly can't remember if it was good shit or bad shit... ah well. i don't rlly think anyone in bsd is ever Only doing good shit so it's fine lmao

ALSO shout out to the minor anime-only character from s1 that kaito ishikawa got to voice for two eps before he got killed :(

poor little meow meow (“problematic”/unpopular/controversial/otherwise pathetic fave)

uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh haha i don't think i need to say anything here

horse plinko (character I would torment for fun, for whatever reason)

dazai. tbh i'm not a big fan of him, but i don't necessarily hate him? it's rlly rlly difficult to hate him anyway since he's fucking hilarious and voiced by mamoru miyano so like. yeah. anyway he's always picking on EVERYONE and he's always one step ahead of Everyone and that annoys the fuck out of me so yeah man i'd mess w him if i could. he kinda rlly deserves it tbh. also it would be hilarious :)

oh and same for ranpo. he annoys me too bc he's mean but also i appreciate him Slightly more bc he's voiced by hiroshi kamiya.... i think it's p much Impossible for me to truly dislike any character that man voices lmao

eeby deeby (character I would send to superhell)

well, ougai's a given.

there's also fitzgerald but i mostly just hate him bc he's annoying as fuck and i HATE that he didn't fucking die after sskk beat his ass and whoever tf is writing this series was like "yes, i think i will let fitzgerald live and give him more content and plot relevance :) MUCH MORE :))) hehe everybody loves this guy!" NOOO SHUT UP UGH.

also i don't remember who the fuck that one guy is with the hat (not chuuya, the other hat guy) or what the fuck he was doing (literally could not understand a Single thing about what he (or dazai) was doing in dead apple) but i don't like him. and i don't like that everyone else seems to like him? i have no idea what his deal is and i think he's annoying bye

(ask game post)

[normal-thoughts-official]

Ppl be like "Magnus can't have flaws??! How dare you say nice things about him?!??" sometimes. All of Magnus' characteristics that we use to describe him are Canon but ppl act like we're making his personality up??? Saw someone tag a post abt ppl only making up personalities for guys nd not girls with his name as if he wasn't a main and didn't have his own story+background. It was made worse as they tagged the same post with damon Salvatore nd now I feel sick.

Book!magnus isn't flawed he's a straight up asshole. Ppl like to say he's better than show!magnus because of his dick ways and I'm just like: ????. Show!Magnus does have flaws idiots just lack the critical thinking to find them!

idk who damon salvatore is (i mean im vaguely aware hes from that vampire diaries thing but i know nothing beyond that) but otherwise i agree with u (also, ppl got a lot of nerve putting a coc in a list like that like being a moc means being treated even slightly the same way as a white man lmao. i mean yeah sure hes still got male privilege but are you serious? fandom treating a coc like he deserves nuance and well thought out headcanons and love and attention? wish i lived in that world)

what rlly drives me crazy about this whole "magnus is allowed to have flaws" thing is that like, yeah, he sure is! especially because poc are never allowed to be even the slightest bit human, much less flawed, without people getting up in arms about it. magnus' got plenty of flaws! he's stubborn, he's self sacrificial, he hides his feelings from others, he pushes ppl away when they get too close to his vulnerabilities, he has a tendency to simply Decide what other ppl want or need (like with alec and that whole moving to idris thing), he is impulsive, and a lot of other shit

and it's exactly those flaws that draw me to him, honestly! like i talk about how kind and caring he is all the time, and that is true, but i know that this is, at least partially, him feeling like he needs to be useful to be loved, and erasing himself/defining himself by what he can do for others, which is the same trait that leads him to act in all these ways i mentioned above. it's why i relate to him! it's why i love him! magnus isn't perfect, he is good, a good person, and there's a difference

which is the point i have been wanting to make when i started writing this answer because like. what drives me crazy the most is how those dark magnus stans or whatever love to say that they write him as an evil person who literally enjoys hurting others (like im sorry but have you watched the show?) because he's "allowed to have flaws". usually the same ppl who keep being like "i write my relationships realistically!" and when u check out their fics, it's like, literally abuse. like straight up physical violence and manipulation and gaslighting. and. that's not being realistic, girl! that's normalizing abuse

and it's one thing if this is a dark fic and its supposed to be bad or whatever and u just want to explore that, god knows i write about abuse all the damn time. its another to be like "actually if ppl arent like that its not realistic and ur writing them as perfect uwu beans and u have no nuance and are a bad writer". cuz honestly, if u think "having flaws" is being straight up abusive, and that it's "unrealistic" otherwise, then that tells me all i need to know about how u live ur relationships. if u think its literally impossible to exist in the real world without abusing others then i dont want to have shit to do with u, buddy

(and im not even saying that from just a logical standpoint but also from experience because ive had exes and ex friends who used this whole "actually humans are naturally selfish and dont care about others and enjoy hurting others it's human nature" rethoric [and the whole "realistic" thing is really just that except applied to fiction] and surprise! they were all abusive! either to me or other ppl i knew, usually both)

and it's not unrealistic to be kind and care about others! on the contrary, it's a very normal and natural human trait. so miss me with that "either ur character literally enjoys torturing other ppl or he's being written as perfect" shit. which of course gains particularly strong tones when ppl r writing coc, esp moc. like no one insists that if alec doesn't feel literal pleasure hurting others then that's unrealistic and ppl r making his personality up and treating him like he's perfect. i wonder why 🙄

like the bar for "being written realistically" for white ppl is having flaws, for poc it's being straight up cruel

miss me with that shit! magnus is kind, he is selfless, he is caring, he is willing to do anything to help others, he is loving beyond anything else even after all his trauma! and yes, he is still flawed and realistic, and no, he is not an innocent baby. if he were i wouldn't be into it because i don't want a character who's kind because he doesn't know better, i want a character who's kind because they choose to. nothing could possibly be more boring to me than a character who's nice and unaware that other ppl might be assholes, i want characters who know exactly how terrible other people can be, who have experienced it firsthand, but who are still kind because that's who they are and what they believe in. and that's magnus! he knows perfectly well how full of horrors the world is, how sometimes there is no right choice, how sometimes u need to make sacrifices, how some people are really selfish and cruel and he's even been used by those specifically because he's too kind of selfless. he just chooses to still be kind and selfless anyway

if you could never, that's not my problem, or his writing's lol

[seoafin]

still the same prev anon, and omg the sukuna one. i feel like there’s a misconception of him especially in the int. fandom bc it’s not visible in the translation but jjk is influenced by buddhism heavily. there’s no real concept of good/ evil in it. and by that the whole power system is derived from it (speaking as a buddhist), there’s 2 main things that affect our karmic law : akusala and kusala. i wonmt be going too deep but just like jjk. examples on akusala are depression, melancholy (1)

sloth, those are not considered to b evil as we know it in eng. and kusala is the opposite but is NOT considered as “good”, examples are intelligent, skillful, contented, beneficial and good. basically kusala are what most buddhist should stride for, it’s possible to achieve enlightment thru sunyata first. meaning emptiness in the sense of recognition of good n evil being 2 opposing principles but not a reality, emptying the duality of them and acheieving a oneness. Tl;dr buddhism has always (2)

been abt suffering (negative emotions) and enlightment. and i’m,,,, somewhat confused when ppl are saying sukuna is evil. he’s not at least not in the western sense of the term. he’s chaotic. just pure, unaldurated chaos. he’s human nature completely stripped of its humanity and that’s why he’s so fascinating. seeing the fandom reducing him to the “mob boss who’s only capable of loving his s/o and would destroy the world if they wish so” is disheartening for me 😞 (3/ i forgot if i wrote 2)

and to an extension, he doesn’t have the capability of being compassionate that most ppl think. i’m not gonna namedrop but someone was basically like “DO NOT write dub/non con for sukuna” bc it just (idk what the exact word was i forgot but for me it sounds close to glorify) r*pe culture in fandoms which by no means i am doing it rn but the only time manga readers saw him as “compassionate” was that time with jogo being insecure of his power after that showdown with gojo and that was ONLY (4)

related to his strength not the “yea i saw the good in u </3 that the fandom constantly potrayed. and i can’t and won’t ever see him fit in the “being gentle for 1 person” trope. not that it’ll stop ppl from writing it that way 🥴 and no matter how u look at it, content creators put a lot of effort into what they’re making no matter how dark it is b i won’t ever shit on them for having a different take on jjk characters. (5)

how do u actually view sukuna or the jjk characters doe 👁👁 i've always wanted to ask but i kept forgetting until the post. tldr = i'm rambling abt the mischaracterization that the fandom constantly do and i'm so sry for putting this in ur inbox

Thank you for taking time out of your day to write all of this anon!! You didn’t annoy me in the slightest, and everything you said is super fascinating!

everything you said is RIGHT!! You put it so well! Buddhist influences are heavily incorporated in jjk and some examples are blatant like gojo's "I alone am the honored one" quote and sukuna's four arms, however there are also underlying buddhist themes in the manga that I do think western fans wouldn’t be able to get unless they’re somewhat familiar with Buddhism.

as western fans i feel like we have to be cognizant of these cultural differences and address them with cultural awareness and nuance (which is inevitably lost if when you’re just horny about characters which hey! isn’t bad!) But there’s a level of respect we have to treat characters with which means we can’t push our western assumptions onto these characters either (that’s also a reason why lgtbq/gender discourse on JAPANESE characters in JAPAN made by western fans always irritate me like you cannot carelessly approach these things without nuance!!) (yes I am @ ing the BNHA fandom lmaooo)

but you’re completely right about Sukuna’s character!! I myself cannot write Sukuna as anything other than what he is, and that is someone who wouldn’t be nice to his s/o (? can i even call it that?) I just...don’t think he’s capable of love (in the way we think about it anyway). Fondness....maybe...if you don’t bore him but typical love? Unfortunately no. I literally don’t think any relationship with Sukuna would be healthy in the slightest, and like I said, unless the reader’s a super freak (which, hey good for them!) It probs would veer into the noncon territory lmao

Also LOL this is funny but I also saw that post you’re referencing. While I did agree with some of the points made, I didn’t agree with all of them. Dub/non con is not the same as pedo****** and in*** and I say that as someone who studies theoretical media + I’m also a lab assistant in a media lab where we regularly talk about sexualized r*pe (aka written by men) vs fantasy r*pe. (If you guys want me to make a post about it going into more depth then I will)

i think you’re completely valid for having those feelings. especially as dichotomy between good and evil is always framed in the western sense of things, because that’s how western fans make sense of these concepts. Meaning does inevitably get lost in the translation (I haven't read jjk in Japanese but maybe I'll attempt it over the break if it isn’t too hard but i have a feeling that some of the terminology is going to go straight over my head lol) 

In the end, people are writing for fun so they might not be too inclined to well, care about these differences, and like I said before people can interpret the characters how’d they like, so I don’t really think about it much. But for me, I’d like to be mindful of jjk’s themes when writing about it!

[excorcismic]

you ever have that one muse that’s just like . . . no matter how many characters you play , not matter how much time goes by , you will never get sick of writing that muse & they’re such a huge comfort character and mean the world to you ?? YES , that’s me with miss zelda here . i . . . love zelda ( the character and the series ) with every fiber of my being and after a lot of debate i finally decided i’d bring her here !! i’m doing leon’s intro next and will try to get to replies ( want to get down zel’s intro soon but i’d like to plot things first ) afterwards but pls pls pls here’s a detailed plotting call for my princess !! pls like / react if you’re interested - or let me know if we’re already plotting !!

IN A CANON NUTSHELL : so this zelda is the princess from the masterpiece known as breath of the wild - one hundred years before the events of the game , she was kind of the ‘leader’ of the champions , a group of people who were tasked to aid in protecting hyrule once calamity ganon rose again . link , who was also a champion , was assigned as her personal knight - in the beginning . . . she did not like him for the fact that he seemed to have everything under control and she didn’t . why ?? well , zelda , from birth , was told she had to unlock a power in herself that would potentially save hyrule from the calamity , and for some reason , no matter how hard she tried , she couldn’t do it . and she was mad at herself for feeling like a failure when she was put under an intense amount of pressure from her father & the prophecy - even called the heir to a throne of nothing because of how no results came from her ceaseless prayers . EVENTUALLY , her powers would reveal themselves . . . but only after the calamity arrived , all of the champions had been downed ( save for link , on the verge of death ) , and all seemed lost . but she would use her power to protect hyrule & keep the calamity contained inside hyrule castle until link would awaken and finish him off .

IN AN ALUCARD NUTSHELL : so zelda . daughter of a preacher ( father ) & a lawyer ( mother , now deceased ) , always expected to be the picture perfect child hence why she never got much of a chance to have a break from endless studying & extra things . she’s always been a straight-a student , has done fencing since she was a child , trilingual in english spanish & mandarin chinese , now a star college student majoring in biology ( her own choice , because she loves science ) and minoring in law ( because her father wants her to be a lawyer like her mother & she uhh hates it ! ) she’s seen as ‘little miss perfect’ because she can do so much and never seems to do any wrong but zelda is uhhh sick of that and is actually now trying to rebel against her father and throw herself into trouble . since lowkey all of this shit is killing her and she wants to breathe freely . she’s trying to do what she wants to do hence why she’s majoring in bio instead of law , working at the local florist instead of taking a law internship , actually trying to pursue a social life outside of the people her dad approves of . that stuff . she’s basically a genius who wants to say ‘fuck u’ to the people telling her what to do and go on her own path and i think that’s sexy .

BUT OHHHHHHHHHH YOU WANNA PLOT WITH ZELDA SO BAD OHHHHHHH

so zelda . given her situation ?? there is so much to work with . lemme spout off these ideas bc i’m so fucking excited .

firstly - people who know about her little miss perfect reputation and either dislike her or are intimidated by her for it . zelda isn’t a snob in the slightest but with someone who does as much as she does it’s only natural to assume she is . but she isn’t , i promise ; she hates that being her epithet .

kind of building off the idea of people knowing abt her whole ‘lmp’ thing - i’d love some folks who actually entertain zelda’s desires to break away from that and take her out to do rebellious shit or something like that !! because zelda wants to get the fuck out she hates it here .

some who encourage her and some who do the opposite - ‘you can do it, don’t be scared’ vs. ‘you really don’t belong here so go back to your books and pencils’

maybe ppl who hold zelda to some sort of pedestal bc of her reputation ?? which is equally as bad to her - she’s lowkey crumbling under all these expectations and she’s amazing but to be seen as someone . . . above other people , she doesn’t like that at all .

also those folks who in any grade of school rly have tried to exploit her need to get good grades & genius to their advantage aka if i pair up with the smart kid we’ll get an a guaranteed . can be anywhere - could’ve been in the past or could be now . 

CLASSMATES in general . from elementary , middle school , high school for the past , and now college classmates .

study buddies !! study buddies that zelda either vibes with immensely in terms of how she works or butts heads with them . her way of thinking is both incredibly organized but also all over the place . she can be either very easy or difficult to work with .

gimme some school rivals or equals aka ppl that zelda’s on par with in terms of intellect/grades and either they fucking hate each other or make a pretty good team . maybe both ! put the smart ppl in a room together and see what happens .

also want to clarify this can be on both the bio or law side for any of these college-based connections bc zelda is taking both she’s just . way more passionate about biology than she is law .

OLD FENCING TEAMMATES OR RIVALS PLEASE yes she is still fencing to this day and she’s awesome at it . she’s got a shitton of medals and she actually likes it but it’s another thing that was forced upon her since she was young .

her dad is a local preacher so by nature she’s always expected to be at church so ppl who know her as the preacher’s daughter/from church bc imma keep it real zelda ain’t that enthused abt that religion either but again . once again have to fill father’s expectations . one day tho she’s just gonna stop showing up .

i’d like maybe a social circle who zelda’s father approves of ?? like , friends who zelda has but they’re more so just bc that’s what mr. king wanted . i’d also like a partner/ex-partner to fit this description aka zelda’s not rly that into it or was into it bc it was again . kinda just ‘i’m just dating you bc my dad approves of you’ kinda deal and maybe she tried but overall . didn’t/doesn’t work .

i also , though , like the idea of a social circle who zelda’s father would never approve of and she hangs w/ them bc maybe she likes them or maybe she also just wants to prove a point . maybe she dated someone for this reason too - just the whole spectrum of ‘what dad wants vs. what dad wasn’t’ bc pissing off her dad is kind of a major goal at this point .

so maybe regular customers of the flower shop she works at - she just . zelda rly loves flowers & nature ( and again science as a whole , especially life science hence biology ) and she can go off on so many tangent about flowers please talk to her about flowers . maybe even bring her some flowers too jk unless

i’d rly find it awesome if zelda had some ppl who maybe liked her enough to follow her when she goes out just studying things and listen to her bc she loves to talk about her passions - she likes taking hikes and trips out into nature or the botanical gardens and stuff like that to do studies / experiments of her own . she likes museums , gardens , the outdoors - zelda loves knowledge and learning about things and if someone just kept her company while she did so that’d be awesome .

i’m a sucker for canon parallels with non-canon characters so . maybe a relationship that doesn’t rly have any specificity in what portion of zelda’s life ( school , father approved social circle , father disapproved social circle , night life etc etc ) but mirrors her relationship with link in breath of the wild - for whatever reason , zelda and this other character are around each other very frequently and the beginning for some reason she is very put off by it but then comes around and eventually this muse , they become extremely closer with her and important to her . in any way !! idk if it’s platonic or romantic but , in rps like this that’s lowkey my jam but it works the best with miss zelda

AS ALWAYS - friends ! enemies !  former crushes ! exes ! gimme anything and all !! the princess of hyrule is AT YOUR SERVICE and i’m so excited to write her . i love her .

and now . . . onto leon’s intro i hopefully go .

[siodium]

REVIEW: BURIED STARS ☆

came across this korean mystery vn and i knew i had to get it bc someone commented that it had a similar feel to danganronpa/zero escape O: seems like i have a type

i usually don’t prefer to get digital copies of games but there was really no choice... i heard the physical copy is sold out in korea and resales are going for 200 USD ain’t nobody got money for that

i don’t think anyone i know is gonna purchase this game and play for themselves and i can’t share the game either bc it’s a digital copy sooo i’m gonna write a review~ please enjoy!!

basically the plot goes as such: the survival reality tv show Buried Stars was about to commence the finals of its current season with the remaining five contestants when the building suddenly collapses. most of the audience and staff members were safely evacuated except for seven ppl (the five contestants and two staff members) who are trapped in the wreckage with just their smartwatches that connects them to the outside world via calls (problematic bc they can only call a restricted number of ppl and the signal inside is shit) and phater (bootleg twitter). after trying to make some calls, everyone was then told that the rescue team would take around six hours to break into the collapsed building to get them out.

ok so they just have to wait it out... in an unstable building that can come down at any moment. cool.

then!!! they find the producer’s dead body, seemingly a victim to the falling debris!! they’re down to six survivors now.

despite the circumstances, voting is still ongoing and some rando on phater claims that the contestant in the last place will die as if the atmosphere wasn’t bad enough.

this is your smartwatch interface!! most of the functions are pretty useless with regards to the actual gameplay but it’s just fun to play around with them i guess

for e.g. you can change the background and ringtone but they don’t affect anything

there’s this feature that keeps track of changes that occur when you pick certain conversation topics during communication rounds and it’s really useful for replays!! too bad it doesn’t keep track of sanity changes in mc

this is the mc!! even though he looks like he would be a tsundere punk he’s actually very soft?? kinda like saihara but with a bit more spine

AND THIS IS MY BEST BOI GYU-HYUK

i lowkey ship them bc of their interactions alsjdkasjs jUST LOOK AT THIS

i was expecting there to be a lot of mysteries but given the circumstances i guess it makes sense to not have that many... there’s no murder mystery if it happened in an accident site and looked like an accident you see

a lot of conversation topics focus on the character’s backstory and stuff so you get to learn more about the characters while waiting for rescue (one of the goals of this game is actually to collect characters’ profiles!)

bonding through a shared traumatic experience sounds reasonable

did i mention that the cutscenes are fully voiced (either in korean or japanese depending on your preference)?? i played it in korean for my first gameplay for ~Optimal Experience~ but i switched to japanese in subsequent plays bc i wanted to be able to understand what the characters were saying without reading the text

the only thing that throws me off is that characters are given japanese names in the japanese dub but the in-game text still uses their korean names??? why

my boi gyu-hyuk is voiced by takuya eguchi and hyesung is voiced by shimono hiro (i actually doubted my ears at first bc hyesung sounds angry 24/7 and i only know shimono’s derpy zenitsu and troll ouma voices sweats;;) wOW 👍👍👍

the first ending is the same for everyone even if you picked the best options

they call it a “normal end” but tbh it’s a bad end bc everyone dies and nothing is resolved

after you clear the game for the first time you will get to replay from the start but your options will change so you can proceed towards other routes!! yay

oh yeah in case anyone is wondering this game is rated T and bodies are shown in the form of a silhouette with non-explicit close-ups during investigation so if you can’t handle graphic stuff it’s not too bad

warning: from here on there will be spoilers for the true ending and other endings!! stop scrolling if you have even the slightest intention to play the game

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collected all the endings after 30ish hours of gameplay!! i wanted to strive for 100% completion in achievements but i’m not sure how to get some stuff... might go back and try other options in the future

in the true route you receive help from this random phater user plughole aND I JUST LOVE THE INTERACTIONS BETWEEN HIM AND DO-YOON LMAO

idk if anyone tried to guess who the real culprit is but it turned out to be

my boi gyu-hyuk......

he had his reasons (not trying to say he did no wrong) and it’s just unfortunate that things turned out this way

while playing, i thought to myself... if there was one person i would glue do-yoon to throughout the entire game it would be gyu-hyuk... bc i was certain he wouldn’t hurt do-yoon

i was right tho... even in some routes where do-yoon catches him in the act, gyu-hyuk didn’t try to silence him

CRYING

i don’t know much about korean law but he has THREE murder charges on him whicH SOUNDS LIKE DEATH SENTENCE

i’m sad bc there’s no way to save my boi even in his best ending

plughole visits you in the hospital in the true ending!! he is also a troll irl it seems

he was kinda sus in the beginning but i really hoped that he was a Good Guy to keep do-yoon sane in the wreckage

and i’m glad he was

do-yoon looks super baby in his hospital clothes

he was not kidding when he said that his actions were bc of his sister (who is a hardcore fan of do-yoon) lmao

aaa the girls are doing great after their treatment!! they visit do-yoon too!!

yeah i also want to know why do-yoon is the only one still hospitalised with all those bandages when everyone else is fine but i guess maybe he got injured when he protected gyu-hyuk from falling debris at the start of the game

...

if you don’t find out the true culprit of the murders gyu-hyuk goes free and he visits you every day in the hospital aND SAYS STUFF LIKE THIS

ugh it hurts me

...

there’s also a joke ending (when you pick the “i’m the attacker” option lmao) which i appreciate a lot!! something to lighten the tense mood is what i crave for in games like this

somehow i feel like it’s even scarier than the usual atmosphere bc of how ooc everyone acts

BUT YOU WANT TO KNOW WHAT’S REALLY SCARY?

there’s a horror route that you can enter by using the “laboratory” conversation topic on everyone and expressing how much it creeps you out

and the entire game shifts in genre to actual horror (like with paranormal activities)

IT WAS REALLY SCARY AND THERE WERE HANDS EVERYWHERE AND EVERYONE WAS ACTING WEIRD ASLJELKASJ i had my eyes closed half the time and i regret playing on my monitor

i didn’t take many screenshots bc as i mentioned my eyes were not looking at the screen for most part but i hope that you can kinda understand where i’m coming from with these two screenshots

...

the game is actually split into two major routes (A and B) which differ in who gets saved and who dies

you can only start on the B route after you get the true ending which is in the A route

unfortunately there is no route where everyone (even if you exclude the producer bc she dies before do-yoon regains consciousness at the start of the game) survives TT

if hyesung and seil survive then gyu-hyuk kills himself and leaves a note but do-yoon tears it up so we don’t know what he wrote

overall a solid mystery vn with beautiful graphics and enough routes to keep you occupied for many hours!! i highly recommend following a walkthrough bc it’s not an easy game if you want to collect all the possible endings and achievements

cuz there are minor changes to the epilogue depending on how close you are with the characters

i actually don’t play a lot of VNs but i feel like all VNs need the route map thingy in AI: the somnium files

my only gripe about this game is prob the derpy translations which usually isn’t a big issue (imo at least) but for a game priced this high?? i expected better

anyway that’s all from me!! thanks for reading til the end hahah i wanted to write a srs review but i just ended up simping for gyu-hyuk