#not like it's their fault though. i DO very much look like a cis woman

[autumnoakes]

"why don't you correct people more when they use the wrong pronouns for you?" because that would mean outing myself. full stop.

i do not feel comfortable enough with my identity and in my community to be entirely, 100%, out to people i barely even know. it takes a lot of vulnerability for me to stop and correct someone i've only spoken to in a classroom or professional setting and go "actually, i'm not a woman and my pronouns are they/them." much less constantly remind people about it. yes, i do put my pronouns wherever i can, and the people who i do feel comfortable around know and respect my pronouns and identity, but not everyone does.

also, there isn't always a place for me to share my pronouns judgement free. a lot of the time, if i want to, i have to voluntarily out myself. which is not something i'm always up to doing.

[anemptypuddingcup]

contains size difference & overstimulation.

trans boy yamato.

edit (cis-male Yamato. I rewrote this with an actual trans male Yamato.)

Yamato stared at you blankly as he watched you cook up some dinner in the kitchen. He was rather intrigued by your small size and cute mannerisms, actually he adored every inch of your and your body. He could help out too and even if you were rather smaller than him it didn’t stop you from getting with him.

Though parts of him worried that he’d hurt you from any type of affection.

“B-Babes…” He calls out to you, a nervous expression spread across his face as he pressed his fingertips together nervously. “Hm? Yes Mato sweetie?” You called out to him, giving him a sweet little smile. His smile almost melts the nervousness away from his body. Keyword almost.

“Do you ever worry about me hurtin’ ya? Like what him I accidentally hurt you..?” He asks, getting down to his knees to meet your height. You smile softly to him before peppering a kiss to his lips. “Yamato. I honestly wouldn’t mind that. It’s not our fault that our sizes are different.” You tell him honestly. He blinks for a moment before looking away nervously.

“W-Well…Could we…u-uhm…” He doesn’t finish his sentence. In fact he’s a bit too nervous to finish it. You blink to him before tiling your head out of curiosity. “Could we what sweetie?” You ask him. He glances to you before averting his eye contact from you. “C-Could we…m-make love tonight? L-Like we did last time!?” He asked, his large and soft hands grasping your smaller ones.

Your face begins to turn a deep shade of red and a nervous yet pleasing smile spreads across your face. “Y-Yes! Yes we can Yamato! I’d love to!” You smile to him. His eyes glistening and in the blink of an eye he swoops you up off of your feet and begins peppering kisses all over your face. “Ah! Yamato! L-Let me finish making dinner first silly!” You giggle to him.

Oh dear, it wasn’t a mistake to agree with this. However, you weren’t very used to Yamato yet. Not his size neither his behavior yet.

“A-Ahhh? Is this feelin’ good babes? Ya letting’ out so much of your voice.” Yamato breathes out shakily as he continues to thrusts into you, making sure to hit you deep inside and kiss your cervix. You let out loud gasps as you hand had stayed waffled with his, gripping his hands tightly while you arch your back off of your mattress.

“Y-Yes!~ I-It feels so g-good M-Mato!~ Y-You’re d-doing so g-gooood!~” You say out lengthily, your brows furrowing while tears began to brew at your eyes. He lets out a little chuckle as he watches you melt on his cock, the lewd sight of your legs loosely wrapped around his hips while his cock was embedded deep inside of you and spilling your juices out everywhere.

He enjoyed seeing you like this, enjoying and taking every inch of him like the sweet little woman you were. A sudden thrust against your cervix causes you to throw your head back, your eyes rolling up slightly as you felt that Yamato knocked some wind out of your lungs. “M-MHH!~” You let out a sweet yet loud moan as he continued to thrust into you, his soft lips pressing sweet kisses against your cheek and he whispers how good you were for him.

“W-Wow. Y-Ya really takin’ it all in like that. You’re such a good girl aren’t ya!” He whispers to you, a soft smile spread across his face. You bite your bottom lip as you felt yourself ready to release on his cock and so you suffer against him. “M-Mato! M-Mato m-m’gonna!- I-I’M C-CUMMING!~” You yell out shakily to him

Yamato’s eyes grew wide as he watches you squirt out onto his lower tummy, an amazed gasp leaving his lips as you did. “Woahhh, w-what was that? Y-You usually cream b-but I’ve never seen ya squirt like that before!” He asks you, seeming amazed by your orgasm. You trembled below him as he continues to thrust into you, a shaky yet loving whine leaving you as his cock continues to kiss your cervix and possibly deeper.

“Y-Yamato! Yamatoooo~” You moan out his name as you struggle to get your words out to him, but he was already so deep in wanting to make you cum again. “C-Cmon! I wanna see that again! I wanna hear those sounds again babes! Scream some more for me!” He says to you, heavy breaths leaving his lips as he felt himself growing close as well.

You mewl out underneath him as you felt his arms wrap around your body lovingly, a few whimpers leaving his lips and he trembles against you. “M-Mmgh~ I-I wanna c-cum~ B-But I wanna see you d-do that again~” He gasps out, drool spilling from his lips as he thrusts into you a bit more quickly.

Louder moans leave your lips as your cunt clenches around Yamato’s cock and you felt yourself ready to cum once again. “M-Matooo~ I-I feel it c-coming again!~” You moan out to him making him go faster inside of you. “I-I wanna c-cum too! C-Cum with me b-baby!~” He moans out before pressing a loving kiss to your lips. You trembled against you before shutting your eyes, a loud moan leaving your lips once again as you squirt out onto him and the sheets.

Yamato lets out a deep groan as he cums deep into your cunt, a satisfied moan leaving his lips as finally releases deep inside of you. He shivers against you as he grew cold and hugs you a bit tighter while you pressed your hands up against his forearms. He felt so warm and loving, so comfortable against you. “B-Babes? Are you okay?” He asked worryingly. You smile softly to him.

“I-I’m alright Yamato…” You chuckle to him. He gets silent for a moment. “I-I didn’t go too rough on you did I? Did I do good enough?” He asks nervously. You giggle before pressing a kiss to his temple. “You did wonderful sweetheart, I enjoyed it so much…” You admit to him, running your hair through his snow white strands.

He hums softly as he cuddles up against you, a little yawn leaving him as he grew tired. “I’m happy you did…I was worried that I’d hurt you…” He says softly to you. “I told you Yamato, it’s alright. We both enjoyed it didn’t we? I’m happy that we both felt good.” You say to him before pressing another smooch to his temple. He smiles and nods to you.

“Mhmm! I’m happy ya loved it…I’m really glad you enjoyed it babes.” He says sleepily.

[drdemonprince]

can i ask for some sex advice? im a bisexual trans guy, i’ve been with cis women and had hookups with a cis guy where he just went down on me. i’m generally attracted to all genders, but sexually i find myself turned off/repulsed by penises and cum so i’ve only pursued hookups with ppl with vulvas (so far cis women and other ftms) or situations where i don’t have to interact with the penis. totally fine with trans women and femmes who are post-op, etc. i’ve just been worried that i’m gross/transphobic/a chaser? even though im bi i feel like a shitty person for not being into dick.

Hey, thanks for the question. I think it is a good thing to be asking oneself. I think that even if you were to conclude that your attitudes were transphobic, I don't think the solution would be pushing yourself to have sex you didn't want to have or trying to force yourself to "get over" the associations that you have. That won't work, and it's not your fault for having them. What matters is how we treat people, not what fleeting thoughts and emotions we might have privately, which is part of why it is so annoying for cis people to act as if they are persecuted for having a "genital preference" or whatever. The problem isn't their feelings. It's their exclusionary, cruel, often violent actions and the words they express publicly.

I think it's worth contemplating that many trans femme people have absolutely no desire to use their penises during sex, or can't because of various medical issues, and do not produce cum that looks anything like the way most cis men produce cum. How would you feel about a trans woman who does have a penis using a strap-on on you? About you two fisting each other? About you using a hitachi magic wand on her? How do you feel when you see a trans guy with a post-phalloplasty cock? Try to reflect on questions like these with curiosity and not judgement.

Maybe you will explore your feelings and find that there are still barriers; maybe for example you wouldn't feel comfortable going down on someone's penis, but would be happy to be fucked with a strap-on by someone who has a penis, or to fuck them. That's okay. Lots of trans women want exactly that kind of sexual encounter anyway. And lots more are open minded and recognize that T4T sex is experimental and free-floating and doesn't have to involve any specific sex acts. Negotiating these things should be done delicately and respectfully, but it is always fine to say "I don't do [xyz]" or "I don't want to do xyz right now."

I relate more to your question that you might know, albeit from a different direction. I have a lot of dysphoria about having a vagina; though PIV can feel good, what I most picture myself as having in my mind's eye is nothing at all between my legs. I hate receiving oral, as I've talked about a lot, but I'm also dysphoric about and disturbed by giving oral to a person with a vagina. I have also experienced a lot of sexual trauma that involved a (typically cis male) partner forcing or pressuring me to have sex with cis women. That's happened to me many times over the course of my life. It's also made facing any pressure whatsoever to have sex with women (either cis or trans) deeply triggering and upsetting to me.

All of my own personal hang-ups and traumas have left me feeling funnily very much like that one line from Saltburn, "Women are too wet. Men are so lovely and dry."

I do get into my head about it being super transphobic of me sometimes. But I have also had fun, carefree, experimental, gratifying, hot sex with trans men with vaginas. I might not be able to eat them out, but there's lots I can do. I can finger them, put my hands in them, eat their asshole, take their strap, suck their strap-on, kiss them, fondle them, play with their nipples, be fucked alongside them, writhe atop a single hitachi together with them, slap their ass, put a dildo in them, whatever. I just don't want to eat them out or have them eat me out, for the most part.

It would be highly understandable if a trans guy felt invalidated by my feeling that way or didn't want to have sex with me given those limits. that's fine. I understand this stuff is fraught and sucks sometimes. I don't talk about my feelings around this topic publicly often because it is so contentious and I don't want feelings to be hurt. But in my heart I'm comfortable with where I am at. I know which limits I have that seem immovable and I don't really want to push them ever again. Having those limits pushed is what traumatized me. At the same time, I know it's not connected in any way to seeing trans men as lesser than cis men, or as less attractive, and I know it's not a barrier to me having sex with trans men if the moment and our interests both align. I'm not a bad person for feeling this way. It's actually really hard to be trans and to be wired this way. But I'm doing the best I can with it to both grow, and not be an asshole, and also to find fulfillment.

[gifted-loser]

The Grief of Having a Trans Child

I am mother to an amazing kid.

Assigned female at birth, but — cheeky as he is in all things — he let me know he doesn’t do assigned seating.

I’ve always been an ally. I’ve always surrounded myself with unique people who are authentically themselves, despite what the majority deems traditional. And though I am a cis woman with what may be deemed a very, um, basic aesthetic, I’ve never held much stock in fitting in.

I pride myself in being a mother who does not live vicariously through her children, or see them as an extension of herself. They’re autonomous human beings who I happened to manufacture, yes. But it’s always been important to me to lay a foundation not rooted in indoctrination, but in strong critical thinking skills.

For example, I haven’t been religious in many years. However, I am from Mississippi, arguably the most religious and ignorant and most definitely poorest state. I did not want to make my children’s mind up about what, if anything, they believed about religion.

I allowed them to attend church with family when THEY wanted to. When they decided they didn’t want to go any longer, I didn’t let anyone force them. I taught them not to make knee-jerk decisions, half-cocked on partial information, but to take in all sides of any argument and use logic to make up their own minds.

And damn, I did a great job because I can hardly win an argument anymore.

My long-winded point here is: it may surprise a lot of people to know how grief-stricken and conflicted I felt when my child came out to me as trans.

As an ally, I’d never had a fraction of negative emotion concerning anyone else’s preferences. You may wonder why, then — if I was truly an ally and as open as I claim — would I feel anything but happiness for my baby becoming who they were meant to be?

And this is the part that I think people should hear that I’m not seeing often made clear from a parent’s perspective. This is because, at first glance, it may appear transphobic in nature. In my case (I’m not saying every case), it’s much more complex.

So why would a non-transphobic, LGBTQ ally parent have such an adverse and upset reaction to learning their child is trans?

Explaining to the best of my ability, first and foremost I was hurt because I realized my child was hurting.

That this body — the body I made with my body, the body I rocked and held and dressed and kissed its fat cheeks — was so perfect to me.

Yet, to my child who means the world to me, this body caused grief. This body caused heartache and dysphoria and even suicide ideation.

Intellectually, I knew this had less than nothing to do with me. But emotionally, I was distressed.

Is this my fault, that my child hates their body? Did I fail to give my child confidence to love themself? Did I not instill enough body positivity, or possibly did I complain about my own form too often, causing my baby to question theirs?

How could my child hate what I thought so amazing and perfect, and what could I have done to make my baby love themself as I had always loved them?

It wasn’t just about the fact that I’d always seen perfection there; it was the pain and turmoil that my kid not only didn’t see perfection, but literally saw their physical body as their biggest obstacle in life.

It was the pain the body caused them, that also pained me.

Honestly, it still does.

The second wave of grief came not from what was, but what would never be.

All those images in my head of what our relationship would look like. Prom dresses and manicures and wedding gowns. If I’m being honest and had been paying attention, I’d have known none of those things were going to happen — not in that cookie-cutter way — regardless.

This grief was much easier for me to get over. This year I helped him dress in his matching white tux to go with his boyfriend to prom, and I bawled my eyes out. Not out of sadness, but with happiness that he was so happy, and because he is so freaking cute.

Now, I’m left with the third wave of sadness and grief. And it all stems from the fact that there’s a great big world out there that I can’t fix for him.

He’s in danger just by walking down the street. He’s in danger just by existing. And I live with the fear that some horrible person will attempt to end my child’s life out of ignorance and hatred. Someone who doesn’t know or doesn’t care that his favorite thing in the world is kittens. Or that he makes sure his little sister gets on and off the bus safely every day, even though he pretends he can’t stand her. Or that even though he calls me by my first name to his friends, when no one is listening he still calls me Momma.

Given the murky political waters of late, that fear isn’t going away anytime soon. It is growing.

So I hope sharing my own struggles with a child coming out as trans may help other parents in similar situations understand they’re not alone. It’s okay to have complex and even mixed, conflicting emotions to sort through. It is a process. For them, and for us.

And I hope any trans person struggling with understanding their parents’ feelings may benefit. Because not everyone will deal with difficult emotions the same. It may look like grief; it may look like denial, or even rage. But it also may help to know that sometimes those ugly emotions stem from softer ones. Not everyone is able to articulate or manage such a tidal wave of intense, deeply personal emotions.

You are worthy.

You shouldn’t have to deal with disrespect or rejection of your true self. That’s not okay. But if your parents love YOU, not their idea of who you SHOULD be, but YOU — don’t give up. They may need more time than you thought, but true love always wins.

As for myself, I’m an imperfect person just trying to do the best I can, like the rest. I don’t always get it right, and I have and will most likely fail my children again at some point — not intentionally, but because that’s the nature of being human. We’re prone to errors and mistakes. None of us, no matter how well-intended, are spared from that singular truth.

However, for anyone struggling with an unsupportive family, country, world — I want to let you know that YOU ARE WORTHY. And just like MY SON is still perfect, so are YOU. ❤

[androphagy]

when i say "cis men are inherently more dangerous than cis women, trans women, and trans men" the "inherently" is because those are the cultures we're usually in when speaking on trans issues online, especially on tumblr. it is NOT BIOLOGICAL, it is centuries of sociopolitical patriarchal-dominated grooming. it's not biology that makes cisgender men "more dangerous" whatsoever it's the literal historical context of cismale entitlement being funneled through decades and decades of "you're a man so do whatever you want."

this isn't applicable to trans women and trans men because trans women lose that "privilege" the second they're anything other than Good Cis Male Archetype. femininity is punished in people who are viewed as Supposed To Be Men to all different degrees and pretending like trans women have any form of oppressive status over cis men (which is a take i've seen from terfs fairly regularly) is fucking insane. tell me what does a trans woman GAIN from putting herself out there and becoming something societally people, even other cis and trans women, will punch down on at first opportunity. she doesn't!!! she gains nothing but another target on her back!!!! trans women and transfems are seen as this nebulous "other" waiting behind every bathroom door to attack poor random cis women and children and if you can't see that and how prevalent that ideology has become eurocentrically you may just be completely out of touch beyond what i can tell you here.

trans men don't have that same context because unless they were born into a family that raised them fully in the way today's (and im speaking specifically on western/eurocentric ideals) men are raised and don't acknowledge their anatomy at all aside from positively, which is a fairly large part of misogyny, they're going to see misogyny for a good long while regardless of (if they ever do!!) passing status. and that passing privilege can be yanked out from under them if they're outed, medical misogyny is rampant no matter how masculine you look - if you still have a vagina, you will never be seen as male in the eyes of most people. trans men and the transmasculine are consistently erased, correctively raped and abused, and subjugated so they can't "identify" as male in the first place. the swept-under-the-rug-edness of this issue isn't the fault of trans women though!!!! visibility isn't a cake where it'll run out if someone takes more!!!!

the intercommunity "axis of oppression/lateral aggression" theory is specifically to pull apart internal biases surrounding the beliefs and behaviors of queers who are on varying levels of othering dependent on their own personal situations and externalization vs internalization of harm/support. for example its not calling out YOU, specifically, for being wary around people with penises; historical context, as i mentioned earlier, coupled with personal trauma and modern sociopolitical theory contribute to the unconscious bias against sharing the women's room with a trans woman regardless of how much of an ally you claim to be (as a transmasc, cis woman, newly-out transfem, etc.) it doesn't make your beliefs right in being anxious about going to the bathroom while a trans woman is in there too, but it gives you a starting place to begin to work on not having those beliefs. it is not a moral failing to have more privilege than someone else!! you can use that privilege to help them or at the very least see where they're coming from and deconstruct your own internalized bigotry!!!!

don't turn every conversation specifically about trans women's struggles into a "but all trans people --" because that's not what the post/conversation/etc is about. you can make your own post. when a trans woman is talking about how she's been affected and targeted in the bathroom by cis women and refers to them as AFAB, she's probably NOT rubbing her hands together and thinking how she's also "taking a swing" at trans men and transmascs. believe people when they say what they mean especially on a public and largely anonymous forum!!!

trans women have every reason to be afraid of cis men that people AFAB do. are there risks such as pregnancy which can increase that fear in people AFAB? yeah, absolutely. no one is arguing against that. trans women and trans men are arguing that they see bigotry and targeted aggression outside and inside the community, and the inside is on mostly personal-to-clique levels...which happens in every community regardless of it being queer focused or not. a trans woman snapping at a trans man for being entitled online isn't her saying "all trans men are like this and they're basically not even trans because they chose to be men", she's angry at the entitlement, not the trans status. she's viewing it from the extremely trodden-on status of a woman who's being attacked relentlessly for something she has no control over (just like how trans men have no control over being born with anatomically female parts!) just like how trans women can unlearn patriarchal entitlement, trans men can not internalize it and inflict it onto others with the misguided belief of that being how they're going to be seen as a man/that that's just what men do.

personally i think there's been a massive schism intentionally driven by terfs, transphobic queers, and cis people (men and women) between transmascs, transfems, trans women, and trans men because it's easier to break down communities once you sew enough discord and make everyone think no one else understands them and is out to get them at first opportunity (and my hypothesis on hyperindividualism running parallel to modern identity politics goes further into that.)

if you make everyone in the same demographic believe that the other has no way of understanding or relating to one another, then what's the point of having the community to begin with? bigoted groups -- cis, trans, conservative, leftist -- utilize that to really dig their claws in with their "divide and conquer" stratagem, and no one is exempt from being a potential transphobe because of their status of being trans.

compassion for those hurting in a system designed to hurt them will carry you so much further than getting aggro the second someone disagrees with you.

[dumbass-tumbler-cryptid]

Hi I was just asking what would happen if Spider was a cis girl in Cabin in the Woods and I decided to expand on the question 😅 Would Quaritch still make her cut her hair? What if Spider was a tomboy, would Quaritch accept that or is a man the type of "woman supposed to have long hair and cook and clean"? What would she casual wear, a dress or something like dungarees, tracksuits? What would Quaritch's general behavior towards her be, would it be different from how he treated his son? And what about typically "girly" things like makeup, periods?

I love this question so much. Gender bends are really entertaining for me when done right so I have some thoughts.

So before I get into the more detailed things that your asking about I want to get into more broad dynamics. So I write Quaritch as being the type of parent that views there child more as an extension of themselves instead of as there own individual. That's a big reason why he's so possessive of Spider. That sentiment doesn't change if Spider where a girl but the dynamic definitely does. Because father daughter relationships are just going to be different then father son relationships for a ton of different person/social reasons. I think a big one in this case though is that fathers typically see more of themselves in there sons then there daughters, just like mothers typically see themselves in there daughters. So while Quaritch would still be possessive and be all "that's my kid and she should be with me." I think he'd see a female Spider as an extension of Paz instead of himself, and that would probably make him even more protective and possessive.

Next I want to get into what fem!Spider would be like. I'm really not a fan of it when people just make 100% the same character just with a different gender. Of course at her core Spider would still be Spider, a kid with a heart of gold, that's loyal and kind to a fault, while also being snarky and sarcastic, a bit guarded due to there upbringing, very independent and self sufficient. I feel like some foster families/social workers would probably try to enforce stereotypical gender roles on her, to make her more "lady like" and less of a wild child and fem!Spider would just be like "lol no." I write regular Spider as being a skater boy, but I feel like fem!Spider would be more of a hippy chic. Think aesthetic bog witch if that makes sense lol. Loves all things nature, plants, crystals, bugs, snakes. Goes for walks in the woods bare foot and comes back covered in mud. Mostly has guy friends without being a "I'm not like other girls"/pick me type. Also I think she'd like to roller blade for fun.

Style wise I think she'd keep it easy with more lose fitting soft clothes. Things like jumpsuits, soft cotton pants, maybe some comfortable easy to move in flowy skirts when she's in the mood, and lose tops. She'd keep her hair really long (I'm talking waist length) and do fun braids all the time, Fem!Spider would have fun with makeup too, bold colors, glitter, flower stickers on her face. All in all I think she'd have a free spirted hippy look with a tomboy take no shit kind of attitude.

So now as for how Quaritch would treat her in Cabin in the Woods. I think that Quaritch is a very get what you give kind of a guy and that's regardless of gender. Basically he'd respect you unless you give him a reason not to. So he's not a "women belong in the kitchen type." I actually feel that Quaritch would be way less confident in his ability to parent a daughter and so would be thrilled if fem!Spider was more of a rugged nature lover. Like I said up top father daughter relationships are just different then father son. I actually feel like they'd bond quicker if Spider was a girl, because Quaritch would just be more gentile with her. Fem!Spider probably wouldn't have gotten tied up like Spider does in my fic. She'd still get that ankle monitor which is basically a tracker/shock collar that goes off if you hit the invisible permitter. The house would be locked up tight, anything that could be used as a weapon/ lock pick hidden, and she'd be locked in her room every night. But Quaritch would just be such a doting dad that he'd win her over after a long while/the Stockholm syndrome would kick in.

Recently I actually wrote a section in Cabin in the woods that details Quaritch's thoughts on regular Spider's long hair so to summarize that, he doesn't like it, thinks it makes him look shabby/uncared for, and blames Spider's "caretakers" for letting it get so bad. Basically he wants his child to look neat because a clean cut look= cared for, in his mind. That wouldn't be un true for fem!Spider but it would be different since girls having long hair is largely considered the norm. The only reason I could see him giving fem!Spider a dramatically short cut would be if her hair was actually really damaged and poorly maintained. If Spider can take care of her long hair then she can keep it. He'd just trim it for her a few times a year to keep it healthy.

Clothing wise I feel like Quaritch prioritizes function over style. He'd make his daughter wear clothes that are appropriate for the woods. jeans, hiking boots, t-shirts, warm jackets. As long at they fall into that category then fem!Spider can have them in any pattern/color she wants. Makeup though would probably be a no go in the cabin just because it's only the two of them so why bother in Quaritch's eyes.

As for dealing with periods Quaritch wouldn't be a bitch about it and act all disgusted by it but he wouldn't be over the top caring either. It'd very much be, "y'a got everythin' y'a need" fem!Spider "yeah" Quaritch 👍. And that would be it.

Thank you so much for the question! this was so much fun for me💞💞

[fangirlanxiety74]

Might delete this later idk

I just feel so stressed and hopeless. Doom scrolling is so hard to stop when it's all your algorithm pushes you. If it's not Tiktok, it's here with mutuals reblogging it. Or a million and one asks in my askbox of potential bots begging me to give them money. If it's not here, it's bluesky. If it's not bluesky, it's somewhere else. It's everything. It's everywhere. I don't know how to escape it.

I don't want my mutuals to stop reblogging it, please keep that in mind if you, a mutual, does read this. Don't stop spreading the word. People need to see it. I need to see it.

I'm just, so weak, though. I don't know. I see it all and my only thought is how awful of a person I am. How I'm not doing more. I'm not protesting in the streets and putting myself at risk of harm or death (I'm too scared to die. It's why I'm alive. I'm too scared to die), I'm not reblogging enough resources, I'm not donating (I can barely afford to care for myself, but I feel this need to give everyone my money anyway because they need it more), I'm not listening good enough, I'm not doing enough, I'm not good enough. I'm not good enough. I'm not good enough.

I want to be a good person. I want to be someone who people feel safe around, and feel supported by, and can look to for advice and help when they need it. I want to give everyone everything they ever need to be happy but I can't, I can't help, I can only watch the world crumble and feel like I'm not doing my part and that means it's somehow my fault, at least partly.

I'm so tired. And I'm privileged. I live in a blue state. I can pass as white. I can pass as straight. I'm cis. I'm privileged as all hell. I tick off every box besides being a woman, and a young one at that. I'm 22, I look 16 (not a good thing- I'm very afraid of what it means when a man shows interest in me. My first thought always jumps to "How old does he think I am?"). I can't fight. I don't know self defense. I'm physically weak. I'm short and don't weigh much. It's so easy to kill me. But I'm privileged because they won't think of me when they want to kill someone. They'll think of my friends. They'll think of my partner. They'll think of innocents who don't look or talk like me. That's so scary. It's so scary that I can't help them. How can I help them? I want to be good. I want to help. I'm so tired.

I don't know. I don't want to look away from it all. But I don't think I can keep looking anymore. Because I can only do so much. I'm just one person.

I think back to the person who once thanked me on this site, for reblogging resources and links to donations for people in need, and I told them the same thing I'm saying now: Don't thank me. Because it's the bare minimum. It's just what a good person would do. It's what any person should do. It's such a small ask. How come I'm being thanked for just one small ask? Thank the people who are really making a change. The ones who go out and find these people in need, who actively go out in the world and protest for their rights, and put their lives at risk, and have the money to give away to help. Thank them, not me. I'm not anything like that. I'm just one person. And I'm small, and I'm weak, and I'm not good enough to be thanked.

I don't know. I don't know. I just. Oh god, what do I do? There's too much going on. I want to look away from it all. I have a convention to attend today. How can I do that and play dress up and buy a cute charm when there's people's rights being taken away? Am I part of the problem from doing that?

I don't want to live if I can't do more to help. But i'm too scared to die.

[icaruskey]

can i ask you something? i dont know how to word it without coming off offensive however i am curious as to what trans men think about manhood as a concept. i consider myself to be pro-trans rights but as I've learned more about gender and sex, I've started to interpret male/female binaries as being inherently rape culture compliant (not the individuals who partake in gender/sex as a construct, just the construct itself like as a concept). my question is i understand the whole concept of positive masculinity but also i genuinely cannot come up with any set of qualities that are inherently and only masculine (also have the same problem with feminine qualities). like every man (not just trans, cis too) who wants to deconstruct masculinity ends up sounding a little sexist to me because i just do not know how something like idk "protectiveness" can be seen as only masculine. the way i view gender (and sex) honestly is mostly as a relic of the past but i dont know if this line of thinking is transphobic or not. bcuz i dont want trans people to not exist or not be trans, i welcome it while humanity is in this transitional period but i also think that gender neutrality is/should be the norm. i hope this wasnt offensive or anything, you dont have to respond or anything i just would like to know more i guess and understand better.

Well, luckily I'm able to read things in good faith, regardless of the actual words used. It's hard to discuss things sometimes without coming across as a dolt, especially if you're struggling with a concept as complex as gender identity.

I've been going back and forth on how to reply to this because I could like. Respond with a detailed breakdown but I'm not sure it'll help you, not really.

Because look at how you write. You're coming at this from like this inherent idea that men as the villains. Rape culture is a particular tell, as rape culture focuses on women as victims and minimizes/erases male victims. Meanwhile, since 2008, when I first became truly aware of how often women are victims of assault and harassment, the statistics on male victims have been slowly creeping up to meet female statistics. Rape culture is also a phrase I personally find adjacent to SWERF rhetoric, as they have this idea that all sex work is inherently rape, regardless of the actual autonomy of the women (never the men) in the situation.

You also focus on how masculinity and men deconstructing gender come across as sexist, with little thought to how women are just as sexist when it comes down to it. There are a lot of problems within feminism, and it's something we see clearly as they constantly have to redefine what a woman is as they acknowledge (or refuse to acknowledge) the different experiences of womanhood.

I'm not blaming you for this. Feminism makes dissecting womanhood and villainizing manhood the default for almost all discussion, and there's been a lot of work done to allow for a diverse array of women to exist in the world. Masculinity and manhood though, it's hard to pull it apart from the villainization that's been done to it. Because honestly, it's easier to demonize men than it is to deal with the fact the reality that the true villain is the very societal framework we exist in (capitalism).

I realize I'm probably not making all that much sense right now. But while I largely agree with you that we are heading down the long and arduous path of decoupling the idea of gender entirely from existence, becoming something we may choose for ourselves rather than something given to us at birth, I disagree with how your thought patterns betray your current biases.

Trans men, and indeed men at large, are not a monolith, nor are women or nonbinary people or agender or genderqueer identities. We are all at the faults of whatever framework we approach it from, and largely the group I am part of speaks from a very Western idea of gender. The fun part, though, is deciding what your gender means to you. Which is why I do see myself as a protector, very stereotypical, but I love glitter and silly and goofy bright musicals and magical girl stuff. I don't wear skirts or dresses, but maybe I'll pick a romper. And I work very very hard to see more than just my side of a story and don't try to make a list of "what is wo/man" cause honestly, I don't see the point.

This is my positive masculinity. I wonder what my followers see as theirs.

[timefriend]

i think the desire to be conventionally beautiful in accordance with the standards for women is never going to leave me. i am afraid that maybe i will never get over it and that i will spend decades of my life clawing at the walls of my cell . often times i think to myself "i wish i were a woman" although i do identify as a cis woman myself and i think it might be because of how estranged i feel from other women who are conventionally attractive. it might be due to a skewed perception of the world from being chronically online but i really do feel like being beautiful is a requirement to be considered a woman. or, in order to be treated like a person as a woman you must be beautiful. being an """ugly"""" woman gets you treatment that is so drastically different from women who fit standards that it feels like a different gender entirely. and i think it goes back to how the core foundation of Woman as a gender is a role that exists to center + please men aesthetically and through service.

and i feel truly awful sometimes because i am so, so, So filled with envy that im surprised it doesn't leak out my throat and through my teeth as a thick, green and venomous ooze. i feel like this envy keeps me from becoming proper friends with other women in my life. the turmoil that writhes deep inside my chest keeps me from truly connecting with other women in that even while we hang out and have a laugh together, im thinking "you'll never understand" in the back of my mind. sometimes the turmoil is the only thing coursing under my skin ! i feel such visceral resentment that they'll never understand even if it's not their fault. i know we're not supposed to compare ourselves to one another but it's so insanely difficult to do that in a world that is very much dependent on comparisons. like holy FUCK if i could have pretty privilege. oh my god i'd be unstoppable.

below is eating disorder / internalized fatphobia territory SORRY

the desire is so strong that i'm constantly flirting with the idea of eating disorders. being chubby my entire life has only made me hate it i have never once felt appreciated for being chubby. even though my boyfriend has always complimented me on my figure and thinks im hot im always afraid that a skinnier girl will catch his attention. i seldom bring that up bc i don't want to seem insecure but like all i've ever known is that people would rather starve than look like me even if i do have some boobs and some ass. like i'm just MID . it's still so difficult to think that my boyfriend finds me attractive. around skinny friends i always feel like i could have one slip up and then i'll be the fat one (derogatory). like when im on someone's good side im "thick" or i look "womanly" but i constantly feel like that is so so conditional. i have so much internalized hatred towards my appearance that i don't know how to unpack. everyday i feel like i need to get skinny as soon as possible and it feels synonymous with becoming beautiful. like the train of thought that i go through daily is like "once i am skinny i will be undeniably and unambiguously beautiful and i'll finally be able to wear whatever i want without my stomach pouch bulging out or my armpit fat peeking out of my tank tops and without fear of ridicule and without fear of being treated as lesser . and i'll finally finally be a normal woman" i think maybe the fucking socializing worked and now i have this parasite of gender hegemony that lives in my frontal cortex.

Sorry rant over i wanted to post these thoughts somewhere but im very whiny in this . but i hope someone can maybe relate

[shrekgogurt]

Oh by gosh by golly, I miss writing for fun. I listen to my fic playlists and get sad because I do not have time and then I get mean to myself because I do not have time and the reason I do not have time is my own fault. Do you see the blame game happening?

In between writing my god papers, I have been taking the time to draft little thoughts ‘On Loving Being a Woman, as a Cis Woman Desperately Avoiding the TERF Traps’ in my notes app. The TLDR so far is: “I’m a woman because I love being one. It’s a deep knowing; my body feels warm and fuzzy when I think about it. In turn, I’m a cis woman simply because society happened to guess right when I was born.” I have also been working on editing a Captain Von Trapp thirst trap in my enemies-to-lovers-to-enemies-to-lovers-to-enemies-to lov…Adobe Premiere. I’m going balls to the walls on it. What lovely priorities I have!

I have also been playing around on my guitar more and improving! I’m no star, but it has been a fun break from using my academic brain. It gets my body moving and makes my ADHD sing. I’ve been paired with my COBB writer for my artist responsibilities and I’m excited to get to songwriting! Speaking of songwriting (not fandom related) I have this chorus of a miscellaneous song I haven’t fully written that I am obsessed with:

I have not touched Escape to Space since February 5th and am feeling so incredibly guilty about it. This is sort of a combination of vague writer’s block (I have some ideas and scene fragments but no end goal yet which makes things hard) and no time. I would say if anyone wants to be someone I can bounce ideas off of I am game but it’s not feasible for me to carve out that space right now. Spring break is next week but I have to spend that time drafting the second part of my thesis. Truly, don’t go to grad school friends.

I have been especially missing IKAB, IKAM so very desperately. I might just chug along a little bit a day for an outlet. Oooooop look at me! I did just that!

(flashback, year 11 aka fifth year)

The scent of him hits my nostrils and it’s effort not to make a face. Great. Weed too. We have a bloody match tomorrow and his eyes are fucking bloodshot. I’m fully minging at this point. Only Baz would flaunt his privilege like this. He can afford to lounge on a roof breaking every rule because someone will bail him out. Meanwhile, it’s people like me who will do all the heavy lifting. I briefly consider letting go, watching him stumble off the ledge to the ground five stories below. The thought makes me sick to my stomach, or maybe it’s just the stench.

“We’re both rather tragic, aren’t we?” Baz mutters. I can only hear him because he’s leaning into me. His breath is airy on my ear. It makes me twitchy. I recoil on instinct.

“You think this makes you tragic? Stargazing?”

Alright! I feel like that’s enough for this post! Tagging as a thank you for keeping me in the loop this past month even though I haven’t been active with SSS and WIPsday: @artsyunderstudy @theimpossibledemon @palimpsessed @hushed-chorus @you-remind-me-of-the-babe @larkral @fatalfangirl @letraspal @chen-chen-chen-again-chen @ileadacharmedlife @captain-aralias @forabeatofadrum @ivelovedhimthroughworse @blackberrysummerblog @confused-bi-queer @cutestkilla you are much loved! Now, making my rounds and tagging the rest of my beloved mutuals: @gekkoinapeartree @boyinjeans @technetiumai @takenabackbytuesdays @ninemagicks @yeonjunenby @cows4247 @sillyunicorn @upuntil6am @excalisbury @takitalks @foolofabookwyrm-activated @dragoneggos @carryonmylovelies @giishu @messofthejess @aristocratic-otter @ic3-que3n @nausikaaa @thewholelemon @taramemberence @yellobb-old @whogaveyoupermission @moodandmist @asocialpessimist @onepintobean @umdiasujo @erzbethluna @bazzybelle @johnwgrey @raenestee @martsonmars @ebbpettier WHEWWWWWW okay I think that’s everyone! I’m sorry if I missed you!!!!

[sofia-bach]

HAPPIESTPLACEHQ TASK 11 - INTRO & CONNECTIONS

sofia bạch ~ twenty ~ social work major ~ she/her (cis woman, bisexual)

[ bio / muse / headcanons / pinterest / spotify ]

Character Information

Painfully awkward yet eternally polite, Sofia was the only child of a rich widowed businessman who died shortly after his second marriage.

After recovering from a terrible poisoning incident when she was fourteen, Sofia and her stepmother Guinevere moved to the Bạch’s summer house in Redwood Hollow, where she has been living in busy solitude for the last five years.

Sofia is sweet and gentle to a fault, though she can also be quite naive due to her lack of general experience.

Very concerned about her looks and how she is perceived by others, as a result of years of being bullied in school and abused by nannies as a little girl.

Despite her shy nature, Sofia can become very friendly and eager to share with those she trusts. However, she also has a bit of a jealous streak as a result of her insecurities, and can be extremely stubborn and willing to martyrize herself for others.

Wanted Connections

Princesses: Sofia is always looking to make new friends! She is especially looking for female friends, as she has had difficulties establishing relationships with other girls since childhood.

Professors: What with her strained relationship with her stepmother, any sort of guidance or mentorship would be very much welcome.

Projects: Perhaps rather insensitively, Sofia wants to prove herself as someone who doesn’t need anyone’s help any longer and dedicates their life to helping others instead... sometimes despite their desire to not be helped at all.

Plot Ideas

Best Babysitter In Town: Recently started offering her services as a babysitter to make some extra money of her own. Ready and available to chat with parents or tutors and charm their socks off!

Social Work Ahead?: Beyond some lucky exceptions, Sofia's attempts at lending a hand will most likely end up with the helped person (or herself, or both!) in bigger trouble than they began with. Could be used for angst or just for fun.

Puppy Love: Sofia, as the romantic she is, has chronic crushes on a different person each week: maybe your character is the latest object of her affection! She’s painfully shy with people she’s attracted to, however, so she would most definitely admire her crush from afar until they make the first step  –if they ever do like her back, of course.

Brief Past Encounter: Having moved from the city she grew up in to Redwood Hollow a few years ago, Sofia has a lot of rather painful memories of her childhood, especially of her schooldays, that she’s been trying to forget about. Whether an old crush or an ex-bully, a lot of repressed emotions would surely bubble up to the surface with such a reunion.

Taken Connections

Friends: @xalicethewonderx​, @itsme-anastasia, @tianarpowell​​​​

Family: @guinevere--bach ​​​

Other

Fellow Snow White Characters: Francis Price (the best friend and playground love she never got fully over), Hunter Guerrero (big-brother figure and person she trusts most in this whole wide world).

I would be very intrigued to see the Magic Mirror in the RP!

[the1975attheirverybest]

not to come across as a performative leftist like you can't make these jokes aaahhh. obviously don't make jokes that actually hurt people but i think from a white cis male inherently those jokes come across as hurtful even when not intended to be. and while I think there could be a case for looking at the bigger picture also i think if you are hurting people you should be critisized and yes allow mistakes but when you are super privlaged and saying that while having made mistakes it comes across as saying you should ignore those doing harm. like a lot of the jokes are arguably not wholly harmful like i dont think he would have genuinely had anything to follow on from trans people in sport but when you are not trans (i am) it comes across as a bit tone deaf especially considering the state of politics in the US currently.

and like critisize the right and question the left but when you are privilaged and you do it by making racist jokes and nazi solutes it comes off across as genuinely hateful and like i know ur not and ur fans know but also do they? because you are a guy on stage who we don't know and when you don't adress anything (other than saying its a performance and a bit) or sit down with anyone other than white men to talk about it it comes off as hateful. and it's really hard to come across as critical when it seems genuine and you have to do the 'well but actually he is a good guy but he is pretending' like look at jshlatt because that's a 'bit' but its fucking harmful.

though i do think the idea that music and concerts should be more widely seen as an art space is interesting because if it was someone in a movie/theatre production doing a nazi solute you wouldnt hate the actor. but i think when thats not assumed because its a gig and you say risque shit and you dont necessary put the work in (like obviously he has morals and has been vocal about misogyny and racism previously but thats not always super apparent especially when they don't know you. and like when he attempted to coerce amelia into a kiss or he posts about hot women which comes across as weird and objectifying that is what people know him for to an extent (or at least my irls) its hard to explain to people that he's not like that.

as an aside I also think its interesting that he's gone super masculine 'I'm a man I'm a male I'm a he' after so many years of being disintrested and saying that he isn't interested in masculinty. like saying that being a leftist man is confusing despite saying previously in response to that sentiment 'just existing is confusing' so like is it all just a bit? we will never know and its both very cool and incredibly frustrating and i genuinely struggle to reach a solid conclusion and put it into definitive words

i think overall his performance is based on trust that he is not a bad person and while i believe that its difficult if you don't know him personally and as a white cis man he has privilege so he doesn't have to worry about the repercussions of his jokes

(sorry if this is all a bit much i have a lot of thoughts) - 🐸

Thanks for offering this alternative perspective! I really appreciate it! I am, myself a woman of color, but I’m a cis woman, so I can’t speak for the experiences of trans people and how they are affected, nor would I ever want to invalidate your feelings. If that’s how you feel, and you genuinely find fault in the things that he does, I think you are well within your right! And you can be a fan of someone AND also criticize them. Like I hate that a second of the fandom is like “if you’re saying this it means you don’t get the band” or whatever. That’s not my intention here at alllll.

The way I see it is this, and please please please feel free to disagree with me! I think disagreement is healthy and helpful when done respectfully and I don’t mind it at all.

1. Matty has a lot of blind spots. Because of the very things you mentioned. I don’t wanna get us off track by bringing up a separate issue, so I won’t get into all the debating, but, like, his stance on “nepo babies” is kinda faulty and a little dumb, lmao. But I think he thinks the way that he does because he grew up around art and artists so those things come intuitively to him. Also, just bring a white, male, wealthy person makes him inherently privileged so his stance may not always be representative of most peoples. So, I agree with you that, sometimes, the jokes, well intentioned though they may be, come off as tone deaf. Like, let’s take the Japanese accent nonsense as an example. Matty isn’t racist. We all know this. DH represents a lot of poc and artists of Asian descent and we know he supports them fully, etc. his music actively tries to point out the ways that society marginalizes black and queer people. We know all that. But, my thing is, would he make that joke in front of a Japanese person? As a white guy, would he feel comfortable in doing that accent and have it come off as “just a joke” if the person sitting across from him were Japanese? My guess is he’d say no. Well, then, that’s a good measure for a joke that shouldn’t be told. If you can’t say it to the people it’s about, then maybe stfu. Like, he just straight up fucked up there. There’s no beating around the bush. He shouldn’t say it was art or whatever. He should just say he’s sorry.

2. I think your point about trust, and about people who don’t know his heart reacting differently, is EXACTLY why Matty does what he does. Like, progressive politics and standing up for the rights of marginalized communities should not cancel human decency. We shouldn’t be in a position, as a society, where we have to even say “no, no, listen, guys! He’s a good human! He actually wrote songs like Jesus Christ 2005, and Love It If We Made It! He’s a good guy!” Like why is that even necessary. Why is not the default of society to say “I don’t hate you as a person and want to cancel you, but, look man: what you did/said is fucked up. And here’s why.” Like, his thing is based on trust because trust SHOULD BE the norm. (Obviously, don’t extend that trust to the Epsteins and Weinsteins and Cosbys of the world, they don’t deserve it). Like the norm should be saying “no. This is bad. Here’s why. Do better.” Without all the moral outrage and performant I’ve nonsense that we do around it, you know? I think that’s what frustrates Matty and that’s why he does that stuff. It’s also unfortunately why it doesn’t work. Cuz people who don’t know him ARENT trusting him. So it’s not gonna work. Perhaps the goal here is to point out the problem within our society. But I’m not sure that the people who hate him are seeing it that way. They don’t realize that they need to be more compassionate. They’re patting themselves on the back for “canceling” him. So…is his goal accomplished? Not really. Sadly.

3. I think it’s inherent in his job as an artist to criticize culture, to ask uncomfortable questions, and to observe and react to his surroundings. I don’t think he’s suddenly saying “I’m a man, I’m a make, I’m a he.” I think, as he has said in the past, he grew up privileged enough to be in a position where he didn’t HAVE to question his sexuality. Cuz he was surrounded by artists, queer people, liberal values, etc where progressive ideals were the norm. That’s not the experience of all of us. I think he took the fluidity of gender and masculinity for granted when he was younger cuz he’s been lucky enough not to have to assert his identity day in and day out cuz nobody is writing legislation to criminalize him. However, as he has talked about before, seeing his own gender react the way that it has post- Me Too, and seeing how the right has capitalized on men’s issues, and seeing how western societies here in the US and elsewhere have been rapidly regressing, he feels more aware of his position, wants to express the frustrations, and wants to think about the issue alongside the culture. I think that’s a function of maturing and growing up, and also just being alive in 2023. If you’re a thoughtful person who is concerned about the future of mankind, then you can’t really not get socio-political. How could he remain silent when all this shit is happening? The 1975 has never been the type to be silent. So, I don’t really think this is a recent thing nor do I think he’s asserting his own masculinity. I think he, like all of us, is going “what is the role of the leftist male in todays world? Especially if you reject performatism , fake wokeness, etc.” that’s a valid question that he has every right to ask!

Does that make sense? Just how I’m viewing it. But like I said, please do feel free to disagree with me!

[sagefranklin]

THE BASICS

Name: Sage Savannah Franklin.

Age: Forty-One.

Gender: cis Female, She/Her.

Occupation: Co-owner and bartender of The Jagged Yard

Birthday: September 23rd, 1982.

Zodiac Sign: Libra.

Location: Claret Park, Providence Peak, Colorado.

Birthplace: Providence Peak, Colorado.

Orientation: Bisexual.

THE PHYSIQUE

Eye Color: Blue.

Natural Hair Color: Blonde.

Height: 5′ 7″.

Body Type: Slim.

Allergies: Atlas Williams.

Dominant Hand: Right.

Scars: Just the typical kid who thinks she can do anything, paramedic who saves lives, and avid hiker who likes to find adventures in the wilderness types of scars.

Tattoos: Most likely a tiny drawing of a bunny that Ruby drew on the inside of her upper arm not usually visible  when she isn’t in a tank or short sleeves, a wolf cub tattoo on her forearm that matches with Atlas (bc they took to calling Maggie their little wolf after the fifth time she bit one of them while teething), and a back tattoo of the field she proposed to her ex-wife in inside of a frame (inspo, inspo)

Piercings: Her earlobes and a few on her helix.

THE INTRODUCTION

( trigger warning: grief, loss, pregnancy )

Sage grew up in Claret Park, her parents were settled and very much the picture of the middle class family that really no longer exists in today’s society. They planned and prepared for her and loved her to death, but even though she loved both of them she was 100% a daddy’s girl. She was a kid who loved any chance to fix things or roll in the mud and was almost always climbing trees when she shouldn’t have been.

Her childhood went by fairly uneventful until her parents had her sister when she was 8. That’s when her father came home with her baby sister, but not her mother and suddenly Sage learned the meaning of the word death.

When she turned 18 she immediately took the courses to become an EMT and over the next few years worked her way into a Paramedic title. Saving lives became her MO, a way that she could make up for the fact that she couldn’t do a damn thing to save her mother. Obvs that wasn’t her fault, but Sage is stubborn and I wouldn’t recommend telling her otherwise.

She met her wife in her early 20s and they quickly fell in love, got married, adopted a cat, and had a baby. She was head over heels for the woman she had met over a slice of pizza at her favorite joint. Everything was perfect, but perfect never managed to stay for long and when she was 34 she had her second personal encounter with death.

Losing their 6 year old daughter took a toll on her relationship with their wife and everything soon came crumbling down for Sage. With her daughter gone, her wife left town and never looked back and Sage found herself abandoning the sixteen year old paramedic career for a job as a bartender at The Jagged Yard.

It took almost five years for her to climb out of her pit of self-destruction and it took her (accidental) pregnancy with her second daughter, Maggie, to shake her out of it, knowing she needed to keep it together so she could be the best mom possible to the baby that needed her. In deciding her life needed a big upheaval, she sent out divorce papers to wherever her wife may have been (her lawyer tracked her down, but she opted not to know) and purchased The Jagged Yard from the previous owner and her mentor in one fell swoop.

It’s been a year and a half since she had her daughter, a year since she bought the bar, and quite a few months since her divorce was finalized and she took up her last name again, a step that took the biggest step of growth because it meant giving up the one she had shared with Ruby. She knew she’d never stop grieving, but moving forward is something she had to do.

Sage is currently living in her family home in Claret Park with her sister, Asher, and shares time with her daughter with Atlas.

THE HEADCANONS

She has a Bernese Mountain Dog named Springsteen who is a retired search and rescue dog who spent the first few years of his life saving lives in the Colorado mountains.

Most definitely has had a crazy night out with the Chief of Police ala this little gem and probably is a close friends of him due to her previous career.

Moved into the house she grew up in when she and her wife had their daughter. They renovated the entire house from 80′s drab to modern fab.

As the owner of The Jagged Yard, she considers everyone who works there part of her family and would help them out no matter what they needed.

[highwireshrimper]

really for all this site's image of alison bech​del as some radical, eternally relevant lesbian voice, i think its way too often elided that her politics and work are like very liberal, very much of that nascent and popular american second-wave feminism of the 70's and 80's. it's a very white, cis, upper-middle class sort of feminism, the type that regards other traditions of feminism (ie womanism and black feminism, transfeminism, feminism of the global south, and more) as at best subservient, only fit as short primers and supplements to Real feminism, if not ignored outright.

i'll speak about transfeminism cos it's what i know best. dtw​of and the rest of bechd​el's oeuvre follow that second-wave ethos well into the aughts and 2010's, which goes a long way towards explaining why a lot of the transfem characters are as one-note and prescriptive as they are. jillian, who shows up on that four-panel strip you've probably seen a bunch where she worries our main character mo by using the women's restroom, only shows up for maybe three more strips, all during the 90's. and always as an example to set for our cis protagonists, to either show how progressive they are or challenge them. they're not people, they're devices, which is pretty weird considering the rest of the strip is more people-focused. i've heard this stands for the later trans kid character janis but i've read less of those strips so ah hell.

it's all a very outdated framework, and better conversations of transfeminism, even in comic strips, has come up since. so why stick with bec​hdel? why do people so vehemently defend her against transmisogyny allegations (which for other reasons i think are pretty well-founded)? i think at its base, people see something cool and modellable in her work. they like the old dyke bars and womyn's bookstores, and think that all their faults, their hatred and suppression of trans women and women of color, their liberal tendencies, all of that can be easily revised, or ignored. the past isn't like that, though. second-wave feminism wasn't white or cis centric out of accident: it was built to suppress opposing ways of womanhood from the outset. but people think it looks cool, and they care about that more than anything else. it's a bit disheartening

[amissafide]

We all do what we have to. We all walk the path we think is right. One day you may realize that said path had lead you into a fiery inferno but even then, all you can do is keep going. That all I've ever done. All I'll ever do.

✧ threads ✧ about ✧ headcanon ✧ the mail ✧ ✧ aesthetics ✧ musings ✧ connections ✧ mirror ✧

BASIC INFORMATION

FULL NAME: Emmeline Vance

ALIAS/NICKNAME: Emmy, Emms, Snake (those that dislike her), Vance

AGE: Twenty

BIRTH DATE: September 23rd, 1960

BLOOD STATUS: Half-blood

AFFILIATION: Order of the Phoenix (during the war), Ministry of Magic (currently)

GENDER/PRONOUNS: Cis-Woman. She/her

CURRENT LIVING CONDITIONS: Flat in Knockturn Alley

OTHER: Vance Manor (is considering moving there again)

OCCUPATION: Curse Breaker, Department of Magical Law Enforcement, Ministry of Magic, in support of the Auror Department

PETS: Barnaby (male, great horned owl)

WAND: Ebony, phoenix feather core, 12 1/2 inches, unyielding

PATRONUS: Chestnut Stallion

BOGGART: Losing her loved ones

AMORTENTIA: Unknown

SCENT: lavender, ink

INSPIRATION

SONG: I'm still here by Sia, Courage to change by Sia, Lean on me (J2 Version), I blame the world by Sasha Alex Sloan

PINTEREST: here !!

RELATIONSHIPS

PARENTS: Ismelda (muggleborn) and Alusius Vance (pureblood).

SIBLINGS: None.

SIGNIFICANT OTHER: None.

OTHER FAMILY: None known to her.

CHILDREN: None.

EDUCTATION:

SCHOOL: Hogwarts

HOUSE: Slytherin

EXTRACURRICULAR: Chaser for the Slytherin Quidditch team, Charms club Potions Club, Dueling club

CLASSES INVESTED IN: Arithmancy, Ancient Runes, Care of Magical Creatures, Alchemy, Herbology, Potions, Transfiguration, Defense against the Dark Arts

SPOKEN LANGUAGES: English, Italian, Latin

OTHER LANGUAGES: can read ancient runes

PHYSICAL TRAITS

EYE COLOR: Green

HAIR COLOR: Blonde

HEIGHT: 5′5

SCARS: Thin lines spreading like roots from the palm of her right hand up in the inside of her wrist due to dark magic firing back

PERSONALITY

INTELLIGENCE: High. Adaptive.

SKILLS: Wandless magic (minor, practicing), Flying (decent), Dueling (practicing, decent)

POSITIVE TRAITS: creative, resourceful, determined, caring, proud, observant

NEGATIVE TRAITS: desperate, impulsive, impatient, reckless, deceptive at times

MBTI: INTJ

BIOGRAPHY: (tw death, violence)

Emmeline was born to Ismelda and Alusius Vance on September 2rd, 1960 on a stormy night shortly before midnight. Her parents were an unusual pair as Aluisus believed in the ideals of the world he lived in and felt himself part of the pureblood society as much as the next one. While he had known that marrying Ismelda would be looked upon as odd, he'd been drawn to her from and simply pushed himself to believe that his one sidestep could not ruin the future of all there was. It had been a mistake that would eventually come to cost him dearly as with each passing day, and later the birth of Emmeline, society made it very clear that they did not in fact approve of his choice. Even though it wasn't the most widespread fact, their family still paid the price for it. Ismelda herself never found her place in pureblood society and in return disliked the purists and their idea of life. With Alusius' firm belief to raise Emmeline the way him and his friends had been raised, the young witch grew up resenting her mother as everything she learned caused her to believe things were very much her mother's fault. How else could on explain the way things had gone downhill? It started with her, surely it would end with her. Thus, the witch felt drawn to her father, doing her very best to impress him while growing up into a competent witch, who would upon being sorted find herself within Slytherin. For the very first time she truly felt at home, fitting right in with the crowd. The loss of her mother during her second year almost didn't bother had, was it not for the uncomfortable attention for the two weeks after. It wasn't until her seventh year that Emmeline began to change her view. The loss of her father, allegedly due to Death Eaters caused her world to crumble. For a while she isolated herself, graduated and joined the ministry and Gringott's for their training program of curse breakers before eventually finding herself at a loss for what to do. In those dark hours she found her way to Dumbledore, asking for a way out. The Order of the Phoenix became her new home and although she felt drawn toward her old life, loyal to those she'd once called family and friends, with each step she made forward, new loyalties began to grown on the side of the Order. Some bonds became strong enough that the fight began to make sense. Now that the war is won, the witch has moments in which she desperately yearns for either side as she misses the people more than anything. A part of her doesn't quite know what to make of a world without conflict, as she feels that it was all the world had ever been to her; a choice between light and dark, right or wrong. Emmeline is still very much getting used to the idea that people now know her as a former member of the Order; a fact she'd tried to keep under wraps for the duration of the war as it allowed for her to slip through the shadows. Over the course of the war her interest in potions increased, her passion for the brewing of those as well as alchemy settled with a part of her wondering if the path of an alchemist or perhaps even healer could be something for her. Emmeline is still figuring out who she is in this new world but she is no longer the girl she left behind at Hogwarts, during her darkest days.

[hooterhorror]

Hi! I hope you're doing good! :D I was wondering if I could get a slasher matchup?

I'm a 6', plus size cis-woman with shoulder length black hair and gray-greenish eyes and a rather pale complexion. I go by she/her, I'm pansexual and a hopeless romantic. :)) For the most part I'm shy/timid in the beginning, but once you get to know me, I tend to be rather loud, cracking jokes and I have a tendency of being very protective and caring of those I love. My friends tend to describe me as the mother friend who would go above and beyond for people;; which is sometimes hard for me to grasp due to past traumas with bullying- this has lead to me being somewhat insecure and ill tempered, but I'm working on it! My hobbies include writing, reading and training. My love language is definitely physical touch and quality time, and my ideal date would either be a cozy dinner or just taking a walk together ❤ I would want my partner to be protective and loyal, and accepting of who I am :))

I hope this isn't too much 🙈 Have a lovely day dear! 💗

I hope u like this anon!

Jason Voorhees.

His mother would have adored you, first of all. Jason has never had a true friend, at least when he was alive. He finds that and more in you, especially with your caring and gentle motherly nature.

He doesn't need protection now, but he needed it when he was younger. And you being so protective of him now warms his stilled heart 🥺

how can you be so effortlessly perfect?

it sounds like you're a bit of a people pleaser, constantly trying to keep people happy because you internalize their negative feelings as your fault and something you need to fix. Even if that's not accurate, Jason appreciates you wanting to do things for him. It isn't needed though, and he doesn't let you not accept the same in return.

Shy and easily flustered at first with the physical touch, but he won't shy away from it like you'd think. He stares at you from behind his mask as you hold his hand between your smaller ones before hesitantly leaning forward and bumping his mask to your forehead- that's how he kisses you until he gets comfortable enough to think about taking off his mask.

Jason is only 5 inches taller than you, but enough of a difference where he's basically your personal giant teddy bear.

he loves seeing your true colours show overtime, going from a shy person deep in their shell to a cheerful and open person. He's timid at first too, and seeing you become so comfortable around him kinda pries him out of his....

I mean, you feel safe enough to joke around with him? Jason Voorhees? serial killer and local legend?

are you receiving him or something? because it feels like his heart just slipped a beat.

Loves to walk around camp with you! For your first date around the camp grounds, he stops to pick a flower and tuck it behind your ear.

nervously awaits your reaction, and when you smile and coo at him for being adorable, he hugs you so tight 😭

does not know his own strength so boundaries with physical affection is important for both you and him

if he isn't checking traps or maintaining the grounds, he's by your side and cuddling you.

so you spent plenty of time together!

and I gotta say

you most definitely fit perfectly in his arms :)

AND HE LOVES LOOKING INTO YOUR EYES OK THATS ALL