#not gonna happen tho :) all i can do is yearn and cry about it
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had a dream about kissing. and now I'm extra miserable
#i wanna kissy wissy....#fuuuuck!!!!!!#not gonna happen tho :) all i can do is yearn and cry about it#delete
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guys jokezo just made out and now they have to share a bed together. just chew on that for a bit.
NO, DON'T GIVE ME THEM SITTING ON A BUS
GIVE ME WHAT HAPPENED WHEN THEY HAD TO SLEEP IN THE SAME FREAKING BED IMMEDIATELY AFTER THEY MADE OUT
👀
(they made out last night btw)
(just in case anyone forgot)
(and then they had to share a bed)
ass x7
also zo is fully just not doing anything lmao
everyone's pushing with all their might and zo is just 🧍��️
FUIWEBSDGIOUVEWJBOGD
oh the desperate thigh grab
yeah, im with him on this, they need to talk about it. especially about how they had to slEEP IN THE SAME FREAKING BED AFTER THAT
welp. I guess joke's day was just ruined in a slap to the face disguised as a few words
AND THE WAY HE TAKES HIS HAND OFF ZO'S THIGH AFTER THAT????? OUCHHHH
I must say tho, this is really giving episode-6-of-bad-buddy
its very patpran-post-rooftop-kiss-core
the vibes be gay and yearning and very very sad
OKAY, THE MOTHER, FINALLY
a few things to say about her
1. she's gorgeous
2. DAMN she is SHORT
3. I was rewatching the first four episodes yesterday and today because I could, and I noticed in the first episode, zo asked his friends to not tag him in photos they took at the bar, because "I don't want my mum to see"
but my question is... why? he's just out drinking with friends, he's an adult, he's not being irresponsible or anything, so why doesn't he want her to see the photos?
is it something to do with what his mum thinks of him? is she overbearing? does she have high expectations of him? does she kinda suck?
she's probably lovely though, and ill end up adding her to my list-of-fictional-parents-to-get-adopted-by (it's a very long list)
I guess we shall find out today as the episode progresses
oh, honey, you're so queer
the amount of times ive done exactly this
she's so short its hilarious omg
also: ive decided I love his mum
she's so sweet
and neither of them know how to use a stove and I think that's so hilarious and endearing
HSDHSHFSHDHHS
(also: this scene is making me think of akkayan at aye's house having a meal with his mum and rhbgdhjgb)
he's putting two and two together
the few braincells he has that aren't dedicated to debating are whirring in his mind
I can practically hear his thoughts
"he kissed me back... he wants to talk about the kiss... we went on two dates together at his suggestion... he showed up at my house and charmed my mother... he says I have secret admirers..." cmon sweetie youre so close
"WAIT, DOES HE LIKE ME?" omg honeybun you did it!
or maybe he didn't do it
maybe he was still shuffling the pieces in his brain but hadn't put them together and then his mum said something and distracted him
either way: that was hilarious and I want to high five dunk for his acting there
HIGH EXPECTATIONS, I KNEW IT
still love her tho
high expectations suck but she seems wonderful so far (obviously my opinion will change if the circumstances do (like if it turns out she completely sucks) but for now she's made it to the adoption list)
brb, gonna go cry real quick
well now their thumbs are making out
you see, I understand the things he's saying. and I honestly agree with him. if I were ever somehow put in his position, id probably say the same things.
HOWEVER, I just want my bl boys to kiss again and be happy and together and I appreciate the realism over the usual fantasy kinda situation we go for in bls, but I just want them to kissssss
this is very good advice
I hope that jokezo kiss again this episode
also AAAGBRDHFKBG JENGPOK CRUMBS
YOU'LL NEVER GUESS WHO'S LOSING THEIR MIND OVER JENGPOK AGAIN
BERIUFDJKGBEORPVFD
I LOVE THEM SO MUCH
SHUT UP
SHUT UP SHUT UP
IM NOT CRYING YOU'RE CRYING
FHEWSDGFVESDV
THIS IS TOO FUNNY
im gonna start crying soon
its so funny
help me
girl is worried
I know this is what jeng told you to do but is during debate club really the right moment
im so certain that she ships it
awwhhhhh
HE SAID IT
HE SAID THE THING
AAAAAAAAA
hell yeah
GOUERJLHDGOBIERVLDNF
AAAAAAAAAAA
IM SCREAMING
THATS IT??
THAT'S THE END OF THE EPISODE??
THEY DIDNT EVEN KISS
OR ADDRESS THE FACT THAT - and I can't stress this enough - THEY SLEPT IN THE SAME FREAKING BED AFTER FULL-ASS MAKING OUT
omg next episode is gonna be amazing
I can't wait
gekjrdsbfd I love them so much
im like 70% certain they're gonna kiss next episode so fingers crossed
ALSO NITA DEFINITELY SHIPS IT
anyway. that was good. I should go to sleep now
#quodekash's unhidden agenda to watch hidden agenda#hidden agenda#hidden agenda series#hidden agenda the series#jokezo#zojoke#pokjeng#jengpok#joongdunk#aouboom#aou thanaboon#boom tharatorn#joong archen#dunk natachai
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so
*tents my hands mischievously*
sun and solars early relationship
i said i would talk about it SO I AM
im just. imagining solar so desperately pining for sun but refusing to do anything about it bc he was too scared to- so hes just silently watching from a distance and no u didnt just see him staring at sun while playing with the kids wut r u talking about?? he definitely doesnt find everything that sun does endearing and adorable y would u ever think that???
i feel like either moon or lunar or earth (or maybe all 3 lmao) would be like "just talk to him man" and so eventually he does and hes like "actually this isnt so ba-" GETS HIT WITH EMOTIONAL BEAM
he feels like 20 things at once and he doesnt know wut to do with himself. he wants to cry, he wants to hug him, he wants to kiss him, he wants to apologize even tho this isnt his sun and he feels both amazing to get to talk to him but also so emotional bc this isnt his sun hes talking to so eventually he runs off and sun is SUPER worried bc he has no clue wut just happened- one second he was talking with solar and the next solar is running out of the room with no explanation
eventually he does talk to sun again bc sun is worried n asks wuts wrong and blah blah blah emotion stuff. eventually it leads to solar talking about how much he misses his sun and how he wishes he could have that same connection he had and sun is like "well, i could be ur brother too?" and solar at first is like "no no u dont have to" but at the same time hes been YEARNING to have that connection with sun FOR SO LONG. its not gonna be the same as before, and he knows that. but its better than nothing, ya know?
and so then they slowly grow closer and closer. i imagine that solar and sun is like the "fell first and fell harder" trope. solar obviously fell first (if ya cant tell lmao). he has no fucking clue wut to do. sure at this point probably everyone is kissing everyone but for my own sanity im going to ignore that so my adhd doesnt get side tracked- but he doesnt really know wut to do since- how tf do u tell ur brother u wanna kiss him?
then u have sun over here who eventually comes to his own realization of "oh shit i really like him like that" and hes just- fumbling all over the place AND IS SO AWKWARD ABOUT IT TOO- like solar can at least PARTIALLY compose himself and hide since its been going on for so long but sun absolutely did NOT catch himself and face planted into his own feelings like a pool of oobleck, hitting hard then slowly sinking further and further (strange comparison ik but its the most accurate)
but they do eventually confess! i say sun does first bc he just NEEDS to let his feelings be known and if solar doesnt feel the same then thats okay bc he can manage and he wont ever bring it up again- ofc solar is absolutely fucking flabbergasted and is screaming internally bc "WTF IS HAPPENING-" but eventually he (metaphorically) slaps himself back to reality and admits that he feels the same
AND THEN THEY KISS THE END!!!!
#void whispers#celestialcest#celestial proship#sun/solar#anxietymechanic#this is such a long post im sorry but im- SO mentally unwell about them
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im just gonna minimal editing thought dump before i try sleep becuase i think i need that
fuckk no yeah im Doing The Thing again. yk, that thing i post about at least like once a week at this point? where my sense self just up and splits off? yeah. that. might be sleep deprivation related. idk. theyre correlated at the very least.
we're not completely separate yet. (we being my body and my mind) (no wait it just kinda happened) yeah ok so from here on out i/me is the mind that does. she/her and sometimes it/its is the body that feels. unless she does something. idk.
i was gonna say she sleeps in too much but like, we're literally up at 3am. have been for the past 2 nights (tonight and yesternight) (as in, was up past 3 last night)
and it doesnt think its a bad thing? like she enjoys drifting in and out of consiousness, at least the concept of it. in practice its a little less interesting but yk
i really do think she just needs someone to hold. someone made of flesh and blood and bones who can listen to her and who she can listen to as well. like it longs to be held but i think she also has the need to comfort. to tell someone else its gonna be okay and believe it with all her being. to be their shoulder to cry on.
hooly shit we're touch starved. i dont usually have the ability to "feel" that i just kinda guess but no, i feel it. shes yearning hard. i know for a fact if she were on hrt she'd be SOBBING about this. plushies are nice and all and do help a little but they aren't living. she needs a living breathing person here
once again not labelling this split as anything. feels less like multiple separate individual things and like two halves of a whole separated with minimal communication between them. my ability to ""sense"" the body's emotions is kinda vibes based.
like i can "see" an emotion and how potent it is but i dont actually feel it really. if it is strong enough she can sometimes do something about it tho which is interesting (like earlier she grabbed the teddy next to her and hugged it hard)
from our (mostly my) minimal research (im unqualified as shit) this feels like it could be depersonalisation-derealisation??? we often get both at the same time so....
do have the classic thing where whenever an... i guess ill call it an episode. whenever an episode happens during the day im always like "it always happens when i think about it" "am i trying to prove something" so it feels like we're faking it but im pretty sure thats just because literally everything feels fake when that happens so.... yeah
like (in shorter term episodes) everything suddenly feels like im looking at it through a screen? like everything becomes flat.
idk. its 4 now. shes eepy and cute. im tired and dont have a separate physical form, so i guess im cute too. its been a surprisingly long day given that we did fucking nothing. again.
she'll snuggle and cuddle her teddy and ill... idk what happens to me when she sleeps
ok on behalf of my body, gn chat!!!! :3:3 she loves you all in the moot way. hugging you petting your hair squishing your cheeks :3 meow
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EPISODE SIX OF HSMTMTS REACTION LIVE BLOGGED BY ME BECAUSE THE LAST ONE WAS FUNNY TO DO AND I WANNA DO IT AGAIN
again, get ready for this to be iNSANE xoxo
woah maddox you cant just appear on my screen and expect me to be ok like HOLD ON NOW-
no one told rina oh ur JOKING-
this'll be like. the worst. especially for ricky oh fuck.
miss jenn's mother's problematic twitter account??? did you mean miss jenn's mother's problematic X account ???
"bigger things" GIRL. miss jenn. no one. and i mean. NO ONE. puts on a show like you queen. stfu (respectfully ily)
"I WAS PLACING A VERY CONFUSING PHONE CALL" so true. i too am confused tbh
OH WAIT MADDOX IS RIGHT THERE WHAT
wait why wasn't jet there. huh.
MADDOX U INTERESTED BAE???
maddox stop hiding it and go kiss her i am TIRED.
BENJAMIN??? love that for him fr
"hahahah... oh u weren't kidding D:" i LOVE MADDOX TOO MUCH SHE BETTER NOT FUCK ASH OVER FFS
MISS JENN WE ARE NOT EXITTING SORRY WE HAVE TWO MORE EPISODES AND THIS ONE SOZ NOT HAPPENING BABES WE GOT A SHOW TO PUT ON XOXO
KOURT THAT FIT GDAMN
anyways she kinda spoke facts. although. im still scared of spiders. nothing can get rid of that fear
all the kourt x ashlyn shippers are about to make this scene their personality and i understand why tbh
FUCK ASH DIDN'T HAVE FRIENDS ??? IM SO IN LOVE WITH THIS SHOW WDYM ASH DIDN'T HAVE FRIENDS LOOK AT HER SHE'S LIKE. PERFRECT. FUCK
maddox stop being gay and just KISS ashlyn im so OVER this yearning (i literally do this.)
BENJAMIN !!UR STILL HERE!!! DONT U FKING DARE LEAVE ILY
BRO FR LOOKING LIKE AN EMOJI WAIT A MINUTE
go on benjamin SHOW EMOTIONS !!!
"i am jennifer !! you are?" "unsettled." i LOVE HIM LIKE A SON
nah that boyband faze for jet makes sense tbh like i can see that
AAWWWWWW BENJAMIN :(
can we pls get a new plot because we did in fact save the musical in season one within an episode. like. i KNOW i can probably skip this episode and not miss much
ALL OF THESE FLASHBACKS TO EPISODE ONE JESUS CHRIST AND UR NOT SHOWING NINI LOL I AM HURT
fuck homophobia AND ILYSM MISS JENN <3 I LOVE HER FUCK
not the mention of CATS BOY THAT AINT A GOOD MUSICAL WHY WE LYIN
SEB ????
FUCKING HELL CARLOS
"give him a chance carlos" MOTHER FR
now why are the whole ass drama class on this what the fuck LMAO
NATALIE RETURN OH MY GOD IM SHAKING LMFAO
this is so out of character like bro no ?? that's not making sense
NORTH HIGH WHAT NO
HE'S PLAYING THE **** SONG CARLOS COME ON
so real of richard bowen he said GAY RIGHTS !!!
SEBLOS GETTING BACK TOGETHER WOHOOOOO
GAYS WIN FR
the longest lasting relationship being seblos is so SO funny to me
YES GO TO HIM CARLOS
THANK GOD FOR THE GAYS
cant wait to cry to this song jesus christ
stop they're so in LOVE I CANT DO THIS
GAYS WON GAYS WON GAYS WON GAY RIGHTS GAY RIGHTS GAY RIGHTS SEBLOS SEBLOS SEBLOS SEBLOS
"us?" FUCK THIS IM SO FSKDAJGHFAKJSDGHFKDAS
now why am i not seeing seblos kiss HUH
"oh so she thinks im a leader?" GIRL STOP IT LMAO
rina scene before they even canonically met alr ???
NINI MENTION !!!!!!!!!!!!
"uncle buck?!" reaL REAL I LOVE THAT MOVIE HE NEARLY DRILLED INTO A GUYS HEAD
"good luck skater boy" hmmmmmmmmmmmm anyways
okay now give me a maddox flashblack
FR IT IS MURDER SHE WROTE SO REAL ???? I LOVE MURDER SHE WROTE !! (im an old person at heart)
GIVE ME MISS JENN BACKSTORY
MISS JENN BACKSTORY WOHOOOO
no WAY ALISON ???
SHE RECOGNISED HER HOLY FUCK WHOAAAAA
not the story of the girl at frozen puking again LMAO
"you should do it" DON'T TELL ME IT WAS ALISON WHO DID IT
"i always thought mrs darbus deserved a power ballad" REAL I LOVE HER
no NO NO GIFTS ??? UR NOT ACTUALLY LEAVING
QUEEN?
NO ??? WHAT THE FUCK
MISS JENN TF? NO GIRLIE.
NO
NOT THIS GOOD THING WE HAVE TWO EPISODES LEFT >:(
"i just got here tho :(" maddox ur so funny but NOT NOW
JET DONT BE AN ASS??
how r we gonna move on from this cuz i-
why am i not crying but was crying over the caswen scenes ffs
OH NOW A SONG ???
emmy ???
EMMY !!!!
my daughter fr
11 mins left oh maybe i'll watch it all tonight HEHEHEH
come ONNNNNN EMMY IS SLAYING AGAIN
THIS IS ALSO WHERE I FIND OUT THATS NOT HOW U SPELL HER NAME
MADDOX AND ASH IN THE SAME FRAME IM DELULU
maddox dont look at ash like that cuz ill run w it.
SHE SUNG AT EAST HIGH WOOOOOOOOO
WHAT THE- ALISON READ?
WHA- UHM- BRO-
maddox IS the stage management
SHE WAS ABOUT TO SAY ILY ??// KFHS
WAIT MAYBE I CAN BE A RINA
I DIDNT THINK WE'D GET TO THE ILY FOR RINA SO
HE GOT IN WHOA LETS GO RICHARD
NO SHES ABT TO MOVE OR SOMETHIN I STG NO
ALR THAT EPISODE WENT QUICKER??? IDK MAYBE I JUST WASNT SHOUTING ABT MADLYN AS MUCH LMAO. conclusion:
show's still gay? YUPPERS seblos? YUPPERS maddlyn? ...hopefully yuppers???
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11/4/2023
youtube
currently reading: mayflies - andrew o'hagan
i love this song right now. ive been listening to it repeatedly for an hour now. it gives me a great feeling of comfort and warmth and love. there's something about it really that i couldn't put into words. it sounds like being young and hopeful. do you remember when you were 16 and had dreams so big it fills you up? i guess you do. of course you do. this song makes me feel like making promises you know you will keep and it's so sweet. it makes you want to keep trying.
as someone who loves finding songs that touches my heart i always try to find songs that feel the same way, each time. i listen to songs that i just discovered and abuse the oxitocin boost it gives me until it's all gone. i would search for songs that would feel like the song i was obsessed with right now in playlists and on search engines. but here's a realization: no song feels the same way as another. nothing else can capture the same feeling no matter how similar they seem in tune and sounds. just like how not everything feels like something. the same way not every feeling can be written on paper. and it kinda makes me cry, but it's amusing. life is experience. just like that.
another realization from listening to this song: maybe im the problem. listening to this song gave me a dreamy sense of yearning, of a certain someone to love me this way. but then i realized, why don't i have someone i coul;d dedicate this song to? why don't i love someone the same way i wanted to be loved? i keep asking for people to love me the way i can't towards myself, towards them too. i'm selfish. i want someone to love me i ask them to love me more than their selves, when im not even thinking of reciprocating it. all i want is to receive and receive and receive and somehow it's still the world's fault? why can't i be on the giving end of the song? why can't i love someone selflessly? the answer is simple. i am narcissistic.
oh and btw, we got back together after the day i told you we broke up. i kinda knew it was gonna happen. it's him and me afterall, this is what we do best. but god i'm so tired. right now i'm sitting on my computer typing on this stupid hard old beat up keyboard with a pink headphone in my ears. i'm listening to the song over and over in desperate attempt to keep the feeling it gave me.
i didn't go to work today. i was supposed to. but it should be a long weekend and i felt lazy, i felt like i didn;t wanna meet them. it's a pity tho because ella finally gave the 2k. i think edgar hates me again but i don't care anymore. he doesn't see how hard im trying for him. he doesn't know how many panic attacks i battled today.i need to pat myself on the back for it, because nobody does that for me. well yeah that's it.
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request from anon: “Hi, can I request yandere alphabet for Kyojuro Rengoku 👉👈Thank you and have a good day Queen.”
pairing: yandere! kyojuro rengoku x fem reader
request status: OPENED
A - Affection: How do they show their love and affection? How intense would it get?
rengoku does not give a singular fuck who sees him when it comes to giving you affection! you’re in the public? you’ll be holding his hand, kissing your cheek when he feels like it, and if it’s that bad, he’ll do a quickie in the bathroom.
B - Blood: How messy are they willing to get when it comes to their darling?
very messy! he doesn’t care. if he sees someone getting too close to you, he’ll make sure to get rid of them as soon as possible. he can’t let anyone get close to you. he’ll go to the ends of the earth to make sure that you’re by his side and that no one comes in between the two of you.
C - Cruelty: How would they treat their darling once abducted? Would they mock them?
honestly, he’ll mock the hell out of them when he feels like it’s necessary. if you’re purposely doing things to annoy him or going out of your way to piss him off, he’ll make sure to remind you that you’re never leaving him. other than that, he’ll treat you like you’re a princess! you deserve everything in the world and he’ll give it to you if he feels like you deserve it.
D - Darling: Aside from abduction, would they do anything against their darling’s will?
despite from the sweet nature that he gives off, he will do ONE thing against your will and that’s to have kids. he needs to continue his family line and since Senjuro isn’t working to be a pillar anymore, he needs to make sure that someone continues that and it might have to be his kid.
E - Exposed: How much of their heart do they bare to their darling? How vulnerable are they when it comes to their darling?
rengoku, when he feels like the time is right, will bare everything to his darling. come on now, you’re gonna be his wife, right? it’s only right that you know what his baggage is! he doesn’t care if you judge him or not, when it comes to this sort of thing, he kinda wears his heart on his sleeve.
F - Fight: How would they feel if their darling fought back?
he would be kinda pissed. you’re supposed to be this perfect wife/darling and by you acting out, he doesn’t sit well with that. why can’t you be more like Sanemi’s wife? a perfect little darling that just sits there and waits for her husband like she should. punishment is a whole other ballgame that i will touch on later.
G - Game: Is this a game to them? How much would they enjoy watching their darling try to escape?
absolutely tf not. how can this be a game to someone? rengoku is the kinda person where if he meets someone that he falls madly in love with, he’ll stick by you until one of you dies first and even then, he might commit sewerslide if you happen to be the one to go first. however, he might get a kick watching you trying to leave him bc it’s nearly impossible to leave where you’re trapped.
H - Hell: What would be their darling’s worst experience with them?
rengoku’s affection, jesus christ. that shit could get mad annoying. if he’s had a particularly bad day, just brace yourself and let it happen bc he will be one affectionate mf. it could get to the point where he’ll be affection even into the next day if it’s that bad.
I - Ideals: What kind of future do they have in mind for/with their darling?
literally a picture perfect life. (very much the american dream in a sense). he wants kids, hell, if you want pets of some sort, he’s down to adopt a few dogs or whatever you or your kids want. he just wants everyone to see that his family is perfect and how far he’s willing to go for them.
J - Jealousy: Do they get jealous? Do they lash out or find a way to cope?
oh absolutely. rengoku is the type of mf that if he sees someone flirting with his darling, he’s ending that shit QUICK. he cannot and will not let it happen. clearly it isn’t your fault so he’ll console you that you had no way of knowing what that scums intentions were and after he’s done with that, he’ll try to find the person to give them a lesson.
K - Kisses: How do they act around or with their darling
he will be very clingy like i said. he wants everyone to know that his relationship is perfect but in private, double that. he’ll make sure that you know you’re loved and that he wouldn’t trade his life with you for anything in the world.
L - Love letters: How would they go about courting or approaching their darling?
he would try the attempt to court you at first. rengoku is someone who is very charming so 8/10 times, it’ll work. however, if you’re being stubborn, that’s when the other side of rengoku comes out. but if you do decide to date him willingly, he’s the sweetest mf ever. he’ll bring you courting gives to every date, etc, etc.
M - Mask: Are their true colors drastically different from the way they act around everyone else?
honestly, rengoku is seen as the black sheep in the sense that he’s always readily happy and enthusiastic. not much changes when he’s in the public. unless you happen to piss him off in public, seemingly the only time when he would change his personality.
N - Naughty: How would they punish their darling?
he doesn’t try to do it often, he hates seeing you hurt. but if you happen to actually piss him off to the point where you need to be punished, anything ranging from being alone for days to sexual punishment (that i wont be going into detail for).
O - Oppression: How many rights would they take away from their darling?
not many tbh. you have free range into his entire estate. however if he has maids working around, they know it’s best for them not to talk to you. he wont let you leave his estate to speak to anyone. you have the right to anything as long as you’re not trying to leave or get into contact with someone. he’ll even let you visit your friends or family as long as he’s there.
P - Patience: How patient are they with their darling?
eh, he’s about 50/50. he can be very patient with you or be ticked off almost immediately. more than likely tho, he’ll deal with your shit most days. the days that he doesn’t, it’s probably bc he had already probably had a bad day and you’re just making shit worse.
Q - Quit: If their darling dies, leaves, or successfully escapes, would they ever be able to move on?
if you die, rengoku won’t move on and like i said before, he’d probably commit sleep forever. if you escape, he’ll spend the rest of his days looking for you. regardless if you escape or die, he won’t move on. you’re his and you will remain that way important person in his life.
R - Regret: Would they ever feel guilty about abducting their darling? Would they ever let their darling go?
to a certain point, he’d feel guilty. i think the only thing eating him up is the unethical part in all of this. the fact that he’s basically abducted you and refuses to let you go. but will he ever let you go? absolutely not. you’d have to kill him before that happens.
S - Stigma: What brought about this side of them (childhood, curiosity, etc)?
i see the only way this happening is bc of his life. his childhood wasn’t the greatest but it wasn’t exactly the worst so idk, i think more than anything it was out of curiosity and probably seeing others do it that make him snap.
T - Tears: How do they feel about seeing their darling scream, cry, and/or isolate themselves?
if rengoku isn’t at fault for making you upset, he’s HEARTBROKEN. he doesn’t like seeing you that way and he’ll find the person that did it and make them pay for it. HOWEVER, if he was the cause of it, he almost turns into a wall and brushes it off, probably murmuring that you deserved whatever it is that made you cry.
U -Unique: Would they do anything different from the classic yandere?
honestly no. he wouldn’t only bc he’s very much the person that finds the classics of being a yandere as the only way to do it. anything like killing your darling or along those lines are way to extreme for him and he doesn’t like it when others step out of line.
V - Vice: What weakness can their darling exploit in order to escape?
SENJURO RENGOKU. his little brother is also his world and i think if you catch kyojuro in a situation where you can exploit senjuro, he might give in but honestly, it probably won’t hurt and it’ll be worse for you when he finally has you alone.
W - Wit’s end: Would they ever hurt their darling?
like i said before, only if it was necessary. he wouldn’t ever intentionally hurt you if you didn’t deserve it. he doesn’t like seeing you hurt and he hates seeing you cry so only if it came to you being a brat would he then actively physically punish you.
X - Xoanon: How much would they revere or worship their darling? To what length would they go to win their darling over?
ehhhhhh, not really. he sees this relationship as 50/50 however he did kinda worship you when he wasn’t your boyfriend/husband but he would go different lengths in order to win you over. he doesn’t really care what he has to do, he will make you his whether you like it or not.
Y - Yearn: How long do they pine after their darling before they snap?
tbh, it doesn’t take long before he snaps. if he sees you going out with someone and he feels like you might leave him, that’ll be a point. if he sees you being too free, that might be another point. in general, less than a year before he snaps. hell, less than half a year.
Z - Zenith: Would they ever break their darling?
mentally, YES! physically, if he needed to. but not to the point where he’s killed you.
#yandere demon slayer#yandere kimetsu no yaiba#kny#demon slayer#demon slayer imagine#demon slayer x reader#Kimetsu no Yaiba#kimetsu no yaiba x reader#kimetsu no yaiba imagine#rengoku kyojuro x reader#kyojuro rengoku#kyojuro rengoku imagine#yandere kyojuro rengoku
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S/o that asks for affection unconsciously when they wake up without even noticing (nsfw?), how would the Bucci gang + josuke + young joseph+ giorno react? :>
So I don’t age up characters for NSFW, so I’ll just do fluff for Narancia, Josuke, Fugo, Giorno and Trish, but I will add some Adult Characters with NSFW for your troubles. :) I’ll add a cut for the NSFW as well so anyone can read before the cut, but only 18+ after please!
Warnings: Language
Bucciarati (Fluff):
-He’s surprised when you hug him from behind when just standing around, or when you slip your hand in his just sitting, or stand behind him while he’s sitting and scratch his back (BLEASE DO THIS FOR HIM he will on god love you forever)
-So when you two decide to move in, he’s also surprised to find that this carries over into sleeping.
-He’ll wake up with you literally splayed out on top of him, And he blushes so hard. He’ll try to gently push you off of him back onto the bed, because surely you can’t be comfortable like that.
-Will immediately stop when you tighten your grip and stir, instead allowing his hands to rest on your back.
-He’s honestly not used to it but he will indulge you because god you’re so warm, and so soft and so beautiful in his arms.
-You’ll notice when you’re awake that he’ll start to return your touches, leaning into your back scratches, squeezing your hand when you slip yours into his, Place his hands over your arms when you hug him from behind.
-Will never say why, though. It’s his secret.
Abbacchio (Fluff):
-You may not notice, but god, does he.
-He Panic. You’re half awake, and you just reach out and pull yourself closer to him, nuzzling your face into his chest, Your breath evening out.
-Oh god what does he do with his hands are you even comfortable there’s no way you’re comfortable jesus what the hell
-He opts to push you away, but you tighten your hold, babbling something out in your sleep about being warm.
-(He do be warm tho ngl)
-It takes everything, and I mean, E v e r y t h i n g in him to give in and rest his arms around you, but once he does, and you snuggle even closer? God he’s in love. You’re literally the most precious thing to him.
-When you’re awake tho he will absolutely push you off the bed without remorse. (Expect a top of the head kiss from him though he’s soft.)
Mista (Fluff):
-He’s laying awake, tracing his finger along the wall, making damn sure the sex pistols don’t wake you.
-In his distraction, you reach out, grasping his arm and hugging it.
-(Arcana reference but Julian laugh) Oh ho ho!
-He takes note that you’re still asleep, and pulls you on top of him, securing his arms around you so that you don’t slip off.
-Instead of tracing the wall, he will now be trailing his fingers up and down your arms and back, and through your hair.
-His heart is melting you’re so god damn cute. He’ll tighten his grip, just gazing down at you with nothing but adoration in his eyes.
-He will tease the everloving shit out of you when you wake up. Like he will not stfu about it.
-He will also be a million times more physically affectionate with you during the day lol it’s sickening
-He is NOT stinky JFC
Fugo:
-Whaaaaat are you doing?
-Oh, you’re asleep.
-WHAAATTT ARE YOU DOIIINNNGGGGG
-He’ll stiffen up, but oh no you’re sleeping he cant just...push you away... he’s not heartless....
-He is confused to say the least, and a lil bit uncomfy, but he trusts you.
-Watches as your features relax as your face presses into the crook of his neck and your arm tightens around his middle. Oh fuck you’re cute
-you’ve won him over.
-He’ll wrap an arm around your waist, (So you don’t fall dsjdsjdsj) and let you be close to him. He enjoys it too, if he’s being honest. You’re so cute.
-When you wake up, he’s much kinder and softer towards you. He’ll make any excuse to gently bump knees while you’re sitting or to brush his hand against yours while reaching for something.
-Only because you asked for it tho
Narancia:
-Nani in tarnation is goin on?
-He’s completely taken by surprise. You’re asleep? And you want him? To hold you? ???? ?????? *Windows start up sounds*
-He literally doesn’t know what to do He’s so soft and so confused with his negative brain cells (I do hate him but I will admit he does have a big heart he is a sweetie)
-He will, a little too eagerly, hug you back. His tenacity may or may not wake you up. (It does. Sorry.)
-You wake up to a surprise hug though so win win?
-The more you subconsciously ask, the more he gives, until you two are literally glued together. (Social distancing whomst? We don’t know her.)
-Expect sloppy kisses everywhere. On the other hand, funnily enough, you will have to initiate the hugging. He’s so scared. What if he hugs you too tight? What if he wakes you up again? What if he suffocates you? What if you don’t like his hugs
-Hug him jfc he needs reassurance that you want to be held.
-Sleepy morning hugs where you two are just breathing in sync and there’s not a care in the world are his favorite
Giorno-
-He is a light sleeper. I know I’ve said this before, but he is a very, very, very light sleeper.
-So when you reach out and grasp at any piece of him you can reach, trying to close the gap between you (It’s a cold winter morning, come on)
-He’ll startle awake and look over at you to check and see if you’re okay.
-Oh, you are okay. Oh, you just want held? Alright. He’s up for that. Oh. You’re asleep? He’ll have to be especially careful to not wake you.
-He will pull you close and rub circles into your back, pressing his cheek against the top of your head. He might even fall back asleep. If you stir, it’s not for long. His warmth and soothing movements lull you back to sleep in the safety of his arms.
-When you’re awake, he’ll definitely be more affectionate, pressing tiny flowers into your hands, brushing your hair back, k i s s i n g y o u r k n u c k l e s (Im so fucking soft)
-But seriously imagine Giorno getting down on one knee, taking your hand, and brushing his lips against your knuckles while looking up at you with literally nothing but love and affection in his eyes im going to cry
-Anything he does will have you a blushing mess
Trish:
-Who tf is waking her up?
-oh, it’s you
-Oh, you’re hugging her
-OH, You’re still asleep.
-O H, you’re fucking cute!
-She’ll study you for a minute, before reaching up to lightly cup your cheek in her hand, careful not to wake you up. Her fingers will flutter over your face, tracing your features. She absolutely adores how precious you look snuggled up against her.
-When you wake up, expect to have your hand held all day. Trish is the queen of hand holding. She will also take your face in her hands and kiss the corners of your lips, and rest her head on your shoulder when you two are sitting next to each other.
-She’ll have this smug look on her face the whole time too dsjdsjdsjdsjds
-Will absolutely do the disgusting feeding each other thing. “Babe, try this!” *Proceeds to hold forkful of food in front of your mouth. “Oh, that looks good, can I have some?” *Lets you do the same*
-It’s revolting and I love it.
Joseph (Fluff):
-He’s already awake. He’s got to get up early and train (Viva reverie reference: “With these tall hat guys for a looooong time!”) But oops, you just so happened to burrow against him, and your arm seems to have found its way across his stomach. What a predicament, you’re still asleep! He can’t wake you!
-He decides that he just doesn’t have the heart to move you, and wraps his arms around you to pull you even closer. What if you get cold? He’s warm, you’ll be warm next to him!
-He will hold you against him until you wake up, no matter how late it makes him. Punishments be damned. You’re way too cute and this opportunity is way too good to pass up.
-In all honesty though he’s elated that you want him to hold you. This carries over into you being awake. He’ll be hanging off of you. Hell, He’ll carry you around if you give the okay. He will absolutely kneel so he can carry you around on his shoulders.
-He’s very handsy, so rip to your personal space. You asked for it, after all. You wanna sit in that chair over there? Aww, that’s too bad. He’s your chair now.
-Are you complaining tho? He’s got some thicc thighs, you’ll be pretty comfy.
-Psst his hands are gonna be like twice your size compare hand sizes he will love it
Josuke:
-He’s already cuddly bb
-But if on the rarest of rare occasions he either 1.) wakes up before you or 2.) Isnt already holding you, and you press closer to him in your sleep, just maybe ball his shirt up in your fists as you clutch at him, yearning for the affection you’re too scared to ask for when you’re awake
-Oh god he cry
-He cry so hard
-He is the (Parker James’ Steven Voice) CEO of bear hugs. Especially if someone as adorable as you is cuddling up against him.
-He will pull you up against him and bury his face in your hair, maybe even falling back asleep himself. (good luck getting out of his embrace when he’s asleep lol There’s no chance.)
-it is always a nice surprise to wake up cocooned in his arms, his entire body wrapped around you.
-When you’re both awake, He’ll do lots of little things for you. Absentmindedly rub your back and shoulders, sling an arm around your shoulders, link pinkies, hold hands, forehead kisses
-He will lift you up and spin you around and kiss you but shh don’t tell anyone
-He is
-so GOD damn soft I love him
NSFW BELOW THE CUT
18+ ONLY
BUCCIARATI:
-He’s in the midst of registering being awake, getting prepared for the day, when he notices that you’re uh
-he can’t help his erection when he sees you bury your face in his neck and grind your hips against him. You’re still asleep, what could you possibly be dreaming about?
-Oh god if he hears you whimper his name it’s all over for you.
-Shakes your shoulder, peering into your sleep-gripped eyes and smiles nervously.
-”Tesoro, would you mind if I made love to you before I left for work?”
-Your lips on his are answer enough. He’ll thrust into you at a slow, sensual speed, showering you in praises, leaving soft kisses all over your body. Never marking, but always making sure the feeling of his mouth lingers on your skin.
-He will speak only in italian during this time, so unless you know italian, don’t count on understanding anything he says. (You’ll have a pretty good Idea of what he means tho 👀)
-He will absolutely make sure you won’t be getting out of bed for the rest of the day. He definitely has a way of making your body melt under his touch. He’s never rough. He’s so, so gentle with you, and you’d be surprised how quickly he can have you cumming because of it.
-If you ask nicely, he’ll stay in bed with you for a little longer afterwards, pressing kisses into your hair and telling you how much he cherishes you
-”You don’t have to be afraid, dolcezza. My arms are always open for you. You’ll find in them nothing but home.”
ABBACCHIO:
-Did you just grab his tiddies?
-He’s in the middle of telling you off when he sees that you’re asleep, mumbling about how you want him to take you, grinding against him.
-Something feral awakens in him at the sight of you, unknowingly begging for him, and he grabs your wrists, flipping you fast, waking you, and leaning over you, his breath hot against your ear.
-”Dolcezza, Is it okay if I fuck you?”
-The answer is yesssssssss
-Oh bby he is R o u g h. He’ll use his stand to hold your arms above your head and push your legs up so far that your thighs will be pressed against your chest, and he will pound into you with a speed and force that’s almost inhuman
-He will kiss you hard, and long, so that when he pulls away, you’re gasping for air, your lips bruised, your eyes rolled into the back of your head.
-Any qualms he has about being this close to you are out the door. You’ll have deep handprints in your legs from where he was holding them, and the darker the bruise he leaves with his mouth, the happier he is. He doesn’t care where he leaves them, either. Expect some on your chin, your neck, your chest, anywhere he can reach, honestly. But if your lips are bruised, that’s what satisfies him the most.
-You’ll definitely cum more than once, and once he cums, it’s hard, and he’ll pull you flush against him, breathing heavily, burying his face in your shoulder. Tell him it’s okay, because once he’s come down from his high, his fear that he hurt you is overwhelming. He loves you, after all. Reassure him. Hold him close, and don’t let go.
MISTA:
-(Once again Julian laugh) Oh ho ho!
-He’s gonna watch for a minute, but wake you up if the pressure becomes too much for him. He’ll give you a moment to wake up, and then ask you to fuck.
-(Yes yes yes)
-He’s like a mix of Abbacchio and Bucciarati. Rough and kinky, but will literally shower you in praise and affection.
-He likes tugging your hair while taking you from behind (If you have hair. If not, his hands will grip your waist, or reach around to rub your clit/stroke your cock depending.
-He will kiss down your back while leaning over you, making sure to leave little marks that’ll last, but not long
-Definitely makes you cum before he does, but if he can, really enjoys cumming together. To him, it adds to the intimacy of the moment.
-”Oh, Bombolone, do you need me so much that You want me even in your dreams? I’ll wake you each time, I need you more than you know. You are so perfect. You are so wonderful, and adorable, and I love you so much.”
-He will literally not shut the fuck up during sex but it’s okay because it’s all sweet and loving.
JOSEPH:
-Oh jesus christ stroke his ego why dontcha
-if you’ve discussed it beforehand, and you’re into Somnophilia, he’ll fuck you right there. But if not, He’ll take the time to wake you, his ears burning red.
-”Oi, babe, You were holding onto me kinda tight and grinding your hips against my leg. If you want me that bad, say something.”
-He will destroy you. Something about seeing you want him when you’re not even aware of what you’re doing? OOF.
-He also has a bad case of not shutting the fuck up during sex.
-The best remedy to this is to just pull him down into a kiss while he’s snapping his hips against yours. Hold it for as long as possible. It’ll make his heart happy if you’re bold enough to initiate a kiss as well.
-He cums before you but will help you cum as well, whether it be eating you out/blowjob or fingering you/handjob. (If you’re AMAB then he’ll let you return the favor tbh)
-Will shamelessly ask you for a blowjob. If you indulge him, he’s on cloud nine, His hands weaved into your hair, watching your every move as your mouth closes around his cock and your tongue swirls around him. It takes all of his self control not to throat fuck you.
-Once you’ve reached your limit, he’ll help you into the shower and massage wherever’s sore, washing you off with a gentleness that’s a stark contrast to his movements prior.
BONUS GYRO
-When did you end up in his sleeping bag?
-He’s awake before you or Johnny, and he notices you’ve burrowed yourself close to him. You’re also
-Nyo-ho. Oh are you also.
-He’ll shake your shoulder, and once you’re awake, he’ll flash his grill and lean in, whispering in your ear
-”D’you wanna fuck me that bad that you’re doing it in your sleep, doll?”
-Who cares if johnny’s sleeping right over there, with your consent, he’s inside of you faster than anything. He’ll give you a moment to adjust to him, and then start off slow, massaging your hips and thighs, whispering how amazing you are.
-He goes slow, but makes sure he’s down to his full length with every thrust, pressing his lips into the corners of your mouth, then crashing them directly against your lips, not letting you come up for air until your legs are trembling around him.
-He won’t change things up until he hears a “Please”
-That’s his favorite word. If you groan out a “Please, Gyro,” And your voice cracks, oh, are you in for a t r e a t.
-He’ll make you see stars, but shh, don’t get too loud, doll. Johnny’s asleep. If you’re being too loud, he’ll cover your mouth with his hand.
-Please hold onto him. Wrap your arms and legs around him while he fucks you. He loves it so much.
-Once you’ve cum, he tumbles not long after, blurting out something in italian that you can only hope to understand if you don’t speak it. (Hint: It’s praises for you and your body.)
-Once he’s done, he falls back down next to you, pulling you close and pressing his lips to your forehead, deciding that It can be a later start than usual today. Besides, you look so cute curled up against him like that, doll.
#jjba#jojo no kimyou na bouken#jojo's bizarre adventure#jjba headcanons#jjba x reader#Bucciarati x reader#buccellati x reader#abbacchio x reader#mista x reader#fugo x reader#narancia x reader#giorno x reader#trish x reader#joseph x reader#josuke x reader#gyro x reader
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The Devil's Mercenary Pt. 6 Technoblade X reader
This is part 6 y'all. You guys are in for it this time, let me tell you. I'm not gonna spoil anything tho. Have fun darlings ;)
Warnings: Slight bullying, cursing, suggestive at times, needs to be edited (I'm sorry XD)
Series Masterlist
Part 7
The rolling hills slowly faded from view as well, but my mood was kept lifted with the promise of one day returning. I felt his eyes on me, staring, studying. My head turned towards him.
"Is something wrong?"
His brain seemed to be processing for a second, taking its time to register what I asked, "There's something I don't understand, well, there's a few things about you that I don't understand." My eyebrows furrowed and I took a sharp intake of breath.
"Like what?" I knew what he was going to ask, I did. I just didn't know if I should tell him the truth or not.
"What's the thing with you and Deam?" My eyes were downcast as I listened to the crunching of leaves. I pursed my lips slightly before looking back up at him.
"I think there's a few things to explain before I tell you about Dream, that way you can fully grasp it." He nodded softly.
"I'm listening."
"My parents didn't love me growing up, I had seven siblings, and I was the middle, the fourth born. I had four sisters, and two brothers, my parents were stretched thin, trying to keep the older kids out of trouble, and having to keep an eye on the little kids.
I was just kind of... there. No one really liked me either, my siblings forgot I was there, and my parents didn't have time for me. The people at school weren't exactly kind either, and I was always in my older siblings' shadows.
I got bullied a lot too, people calling me ugly, saying I was a freak, unworthy. But as I got older, they just didn't bother anymore. Sure they left me alone, that's what I had wanted, what I had craved for, longed for even... but I had felt alone. Even more so then.
I spent late nights outside in the garden, or by a small lake or body of water, I loved to skip stones and watch as they hopped across the water. I would spend lonely days at school, I didn't even have to hide to prevent being bullied. No one wanted anything to do with me.
I think the first time I met Tommy was when I was walking through the woods. There was a little clearing in the middle of those woods that I would love to visit. I wasn't used to seeing other people there and I kind of freaked out at first. I stumbled back and practically hugged a tree," I started smiling to myself as I looked ahead of us, he was looking at me closely as I took another breath.
"As fate may have it, we got along well. Tommy's loud and out there, and it made me feel like I actually was welcome next to him. He wasn't avoiding me or pretending I didn't exist. He would take time out of his day to come and see me. We would go exploring together, build together, we even found those stupid disks when we were exploring.
Then one day he came to me with a proposition, he wanted me to join a nation, come meet his friends. He promised me that I would never have to be alone, I would never be forgotten, I would be loved and cared for, and I could have the family I always wanted.
It seemed so good, it was everything I desired, and Tommy was giving it to me. So I agreed. I walked up to the walls of L'manburg as they were being constructed. I met Wilbur, Eret, Niki, and Tubbo.
I loved Tubbo almost instantly, Tommy, him, and I would get into trouble, pull pranks, and hang out together every day. Wilbur and I got on well too, but for... other reasons. I fell in love with Wilbur. He fell in love with me.
He swore to protect me, that we would never let me go, that he'd always love me, and he hasn't broken that promise," tears started forming in my eyes as I looked at the ground, while a sad painted smile formed.
"I do love him, I love him with all my being. Everyone in L'manburg sees me as this saint, this beautiful angel that could do no wrong. I bake treats with Niki. I sing songs with Wilbur, I look after Tommy and Tubbo whenever they go out exploring with me.
I tend to the people of L'manburg. I'm there when they need a shoulder to cry on, I nurse them back to health when they're sick, I make sure they get the right amount of sleep, that they don't overwork themselves.
I mean what could I do wrong? I'm literally perfect. Except I'm not, I betrayed their trust without them knowing. I go behind their backs whenever I get the chance. I kill people that have done no wrong except live their lives.
I've slept with the enemy, sold my soul to Dream, and became the Devil's Mercenary, just so that I could have the attention I had yearned, even though I already had it. Dream and I's relationship is weird. I kill people for him, and I get dick." My head fell even more. My own shame washing over me as my arms wrapped around me as a security blanket.
"I don't deserve them, and they don't deserve to deal with me," I choked out. My silent sobs wracking my body, "I'm nothing but a fake, I'm no better than Eret. I'm worse."
The silence was buzzing, filled with tension and unspoken words.
"I'm sorry."
"What?" My voice cracked slightly.
"I'm sorry about what happened to you."
I sniffled and rubbed my nose.
"Let's just get home." And the rest of the trip was silent.
#technoblade x reader#x reader#technoblade#dsmp x reader#mcyt#mcyt x reader#x y/n#technoblade x y/n#dsmp#angst
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To bee or not to bee - a Jasonette fic
@moonlitceleste I almost let this die, I honestly really wanted it dead but alas it was clearly meant to bee
(WARNING: contains puns, angst, crack and fluff. You have been warned)
If you don’t want to read my sarcastic/funny/fangirl commentary, skip the brackets
I have another bee movie au, i didn't plan it ("I don't claim to be proud. But my head won't be hung in shame. I didn't plan it. But the light turned red, and I ran it. And I'm still standing. It's not what I wanted, but now that it's right here. I understand it. A story written by my own hand" as quoted from Waitress), it just happened and i just couldn't resist. I'm not sorry
So what if instead of dying Joker turned Jason into a bee. Because Harley convinced him and told him that people were talking shit about him because he's named the Joker and they don't think he's funny. It surprisingly works. (Obviously Harley was the one who made the plan and did the magic I mean really what do u expect of Joker?)
Ok so now Jason’s a bee right? And he’s like 15 because .~:°*plot*°:~.
They look for him and Jason’s like flying around like, “Guys! Guys I’m right here!” Poor kid. (I mean I would make it funny but like angst)
Obviously they don’t understand him because he’s a fucking bee and Joker cackles madly and Harley laughs too but it doesn’t quite reach her eyes and it's kinda that laugh u do when ur supes overwhelmed and sound maniacal but like soft (I’m a simp for Harley being portrayed as the complex and beautiful character she id leave me be)
Jason is very sad. And also quite pissed
Not knowing what else to do he follows Batman home, he listens to them trying to find him, watches Dick freak out and Alfred wipe a tear the rest of the family doesn’t see.
Jason tries to approach Alfred, hoping he somehow recognizes what happened
He doesn’t, Alfred closes him in a glass and paper and takes him outside.
He sneaks back into the manor and sleeps in one of the flowers (it's a red tulip because aesthetic) next to his bed. He cries himself to sleep. (Can bees cry? Is this possible? Is this like a thing??? I don't need sleep i need answers)
The thing is even tho he's now a bee, he still has the durability of a human, so even stepping on him won’t crush him and he still has a human lifespan
Because Harley isn’t a monster and what Puddin didn’t know couldn’t hurt him. (Simping for Harley Quinn strike 2)
After a while at the manor and following them he decides he can’t stand it anymore. Alfred has thrown him out three times and Dick freaks out each time he sees him as he’s a tad allergic (read: he would die if stung)
Which is how Jason found out that getting hit with a newspaper wouldn’t kill him.
He leaves.
He’s a bee and it’s not like he knows about a way to reverse it.
But there was someone who might.
He goes to Arkham.
Luckily, Harley was still there. (YAY we get to see mah gurl)
He flies into her cell and she just watches him, then she seems to click. She gives him a small smile, “Hi birdie,” (she puns, honestly would make for a better clown of Gotham and I saw an idea for that once where she steals Joker’s title once and I’ve been yearning for it ever since)
She holds out a finger and he lands on it, she laughs but tears come to her eyes,” Hey at least you’re not dead. That was his original plan you know? To kill you with a crowbar. I convinced him this would be a cruller fate. I guess maybe it is, but at least this way... Ugh how the hell did I get here,” (Harley angst, honestly it’s all just self service at this point)
He simply stared at her as she cried, and he felt his heart clench. From here she looked so sad... not crazy, just broken.
She took a deep breath and looked at him seriously, “Look kid, there’s a way to get you back to normal, you just need to find someone, they’re called the Guardian of the Miraculous. They can help, I don’t know who or where they are, just follow your instincts. And come say hi when you get back, yeah? I could do with the... healthier company. And remember, I bee-lieve in you,” (Gasp what a shock, you mean to tell me Miraculous magic is gonna be involved in this Maribat au. Well I never what a shock. Also puns. Oh and she’s so nice to him. We love Harley in this house)
He sat there and studied her for a while more, there was more to her than it seemed. Than what he’d assumed.
But for now, he had his own problems to deal with.
She gave him a small wave as he left. (Adorable)
He left and started considering his options, as a bee, it would probably be safest to stay inside, away from birds and things that would view him as a snack.
Staying in Arkham seemed like his best option, as bad an option as it was.
Most of the prisoners wouldn’t have a second thought about trying to crush him.
A strong scent of flowers and plants suddenly came to his attention.
Of course! Poison Ivy. (Round 2 of me simping for beautiful, complex, badass women. Too bad Catwoman ain’t here.)
He followed the smell to her cell and saw her staring out of her small window. He was still taking a chance, but she loved plants and flowers and bees were important to those, weren’t they?
He flew to the window bars and sat on one. The moment she spotted him she smiled widely, in a soft way he hadn’t seen on her before. (Ahhhhh my darling plant redhead. I love writing the Sirens as soft badasses. Also has anyone noticed how rare brunettes are in superhero worlds? Like both in Marvel and DC but like irl brown is like a pretty damn common)
She held out her finger, “Hey there, little guy. A little far from home, aren’t we?”
She had no idea.
He landed on her fingertip and watched in awe as a flower and a few leaves formed on her hand. She let the flower grow itself around one of her window bars and held her finger next to one of the petals.
“There you go, it’s all I can manage with my power dampers. I haven’t had company in a while,” she said softly as he crawled into the flower. He made himself comfortable.
She laughed to herself and he saw her shaking her head, “Talking to a bee, well, I guess stranger things have happened,” (yeah ur crush is dating a green haired murderous psychopath and you get beat up by a billionaire in a batsuit on like a biweekly basis)
The flower was soft and warm and felt safer than he expected it to. He found that he could move between the petals but decided to curl up in the middle. (It's a pink rose this time because fuck yeah flowers)
He slept better than he had in days.
The next morning he took his leave, stopping only at the manor to say a mental goodbye.
Then he headed off.
Jason flew a lot the first few months, our boy was smart at least, travelling with a cruise ship on its way to Europe.
It was Spring in the Northern Hemisphere so he had until Autumn until it was in his best interest to head south to avoid the snow. He decided to head towards Africa when summer started coming to an end. (I have no reasoning for this, just that I want to)
His first spot would be the United Kingdom. Then he'd go through the rest of Europe following his instincts.
At least it was Spring.
Jason diligently searched through England, Scotland and Ireland but found nothing.
By the time he was done he realized it was time to start heading South. He’d decided to take another cruise to South-Africa, where it would be summer, he searched through the country until April. He would admit that he didn’t feel drawn to anything in any of their 9 provinces so his search wasn’t as diligent as in England. He didn’t feel anymore drawn to the neighbouring countries like Namibia or Botswana either.
(Once again no reasoning for why I picked these countries, I mean the French Hugonotes went there when they were fleeing from the French Catholics who wanted them dead so I guess I could make up some bullshit about Mari having an ancestor in common with someone there or maybe it was just the ship he could easiest get access I don’t know, you make something up)
Which was why he decided to go back to Europe as soon as April hit.
He hitched another ride on a cruise headed for France.
It’s been a year since he got turned into a damn bee.
He was sixteen now and while he’d seen some amazing things all through South-Africa (a place that proves that humans really do have a weirdly obvious way of naming things I mean the Amazon river and Chad Lake are just more examples really) as well as the United Kingdom, all he really wanted was to go back home, to be human again.
When he gets there he diligently makes his way through France, eventually arriving in Paris.
He lands on the tip top of the Eiffel Tower. As in the point of the antenna because why not.
During his year he realized that birds and other animals tended to avoid him, sensing his strangeness so that was at least one positive.
He stared out over the city. Well, the one good thing about this was definitely the views he’s been allowed to see.
That was until a massive explosion hit.
“What the fuck?” he said out loud, searching for the source. No one understood him, human or bee, but talking to himself reminded him of his humanity.
He found the source of the explosion but just as he started flying to its general direction, a blinding white light shone followed by a horde of ladybugs that were fixing everything that was wrong. (Imagine how scary this would lowkey be irl tho? Just a shit ton of Ladybugs descending on Paris my dude)
He decided that he needed a night’s sleep before he could even begin an attempt at deciphering what had just happened. He flew lower, finding a nice little balcony right above a bakery. And it had flowers. (I’ll give u five seconds to guess who this balcony belongs to)
He flew down, exploring.
He turned around when he heard a loud thump from behind him. What appeared to be a super heroine in red spandex with black spots had landed on the balcony.
She detransformed and started to talking to a floating bug- fairy thing. Strange. Though it wasn’t like he could judge, as an ex superhero sidekick who was thought to be dead but was actually a bee.
She disappeared down her trapdoor and he made himself comfortable in one of her flowers.
He slept soundly until somewhere during a night another thump woke him. He looked out of his sleeping spot to see a cat superhero stand on her balcony. He leaned down and knocked on her small trapdoor.
Ah, a teammate of hers, they were probably meeting about something, he thought as he heard her open up.
It didn’t take him long to realize that even though they were teammates, the cat, Chat Noir he later learned, was not aware of this fact.
Oh this was rich.
He couldn’t bee-lieve his eyes. (ok so Jason used self-referential puns but can you really blame him? It’s really just me and my pun problem so don’t blame the kid)
He was going on and on about his feelings for Ladybug, the girl’s hero form, that were clashing with his feelings for another girl he fenced with, while she listened, clearly fed up with it.
He also claimed that he thought that maybe they were one and the same. Which, to Jason, was hilarious as he was literally saying this to the actual Ladybug’s face.
Marinette- he learned from the Cat’s ongoing blabbering, he was a real blab-bee mouth, - was clearly tired, nodding half asleep, probably having heard it all before.
When he finally left Jason went to sleep again, incredibly amused and even more thankful that he was fluent in French. ( u think this is plot convenience? Just u wait mah dude iz about to get worse)
The next morning he decided to follow her to school. Which was how he learned of her huge crush on a boy named Adrien Agreste.
After learning the boy could fence thanks to Marinette’s obsession interest in him, he got suspicious.
Could it really bee? (not a typo)
After seeing the boy transform a month or two later for patrol he laughed like he hadn’t for over a year. It very much was. He'd spent the time staying on Marinette's balcony and decided to stay another week before moving on and continuing his search, after all, he couldn't stop now that he finally felt like he was getting close.
The next day she got home crying, claiming that Adrien had started dating someone else.
Kagami, she called the girl. Probably the fencer if he had to place a bet.
“I’m sorry, Marinette,” Tikki told the girl.
“That boy's an idiot,” he said, speaking his mind, another thing he’d gotten use to being allowed to do without consequence.
Marinette nearly jumped out of her skin, she looked around and he realized that she could hear him. He hadn’t really spoken too much before, at least not when she was around. He was usually content with watching her do whatever she was doing that day.
“Tikki, did you hear that?” she asked, Tikki nodded, her eyes landing on him.
“Oh,” the kwami said softly, flying over to him, “Oh, you poor thing, who did this to you?” (Tikki is the first ever mom friend and u can fight me on this)
He stared up at her, flying so that they were eye level.
Marinette gaped at them, heartbreak seemingly forgotten, “Tik- Tikki, are- who are you talking- are you talking to a – Tikki is that a bee?!” she finally spluttered out.
“No,” Tikki said, studying him, he felt his heart twist in hope and his stomach roll in surprise. Did she know?
“I mean yes, but no. He’s a boy whose been turned into a bee,” Tikki explained, turning back to Marinette.
“Oh,” Marinette said softly, turning to him. She held her hand out and after some hesitation he landed on her finger. She looked at him then back to Tikki.
How did they know? Would he really be that lucky? Was this real?
“Uhm, how?” she said, staring at him in disbelief. He tried shrugging but realized he couldn’t anymore- beecause of his- well if you haven’t caught on to the fact that he’s a bee by now you should really start from the beginning of this story.
“I don’t know, but Joker and Harley Quinn were involved,” he said.
Marinette stared at him in disbelief, blinking a few times. She sat in shock a few moments longer. (Our darling is an awkward lil bean, and while in media awkward is portrayed as cute, irl it isn’t, it’s just well… awkward. And we’re writing a serious and realistic fic about this sidekick of guy who wears a batsuit/billionaire's ward getting turned into a bee and falling in love with a magical girl fighting a butterfly man- none of this unrealistic nonsense)
Tikki flew over and sat on Marinette’s shoulder while her holder processed the information, the kwami stared at him sweetly, “What’s your name?”
He swallowed, he hadn’t said his name in ages, it stirred up something (emotion, it’s called emotion, Jason, you know? The thing Batman can’t process??) in him, “Jason Todd,”
Marinette seemed to finally snap out of her daze, “That sounds American. Are you American? Wait if Joker and Harley are involved then you’re probably from Gotham. Are you? Wait I’ve seen the name Jason Todd somewhere. Weren’t you some rich guy’s ward? It was all over the news last year, Alya wouldn’t stop talking about it for a month, she had a million theories. He was – you were announced dead two months after Robin was taken captive by Joker, everyone thought he was – you were killed. Joker made outrageous claims as they arrested him... saying that they’d never find Robin... that he’d all but disappeared in thin air... that he wouldn’t be the only one wearing stripes... I remember because he put a really weird emphasis on the words be and stripes and...,” her eyes widened and she gasped as she looked at him in what could only be described as pure shock. (Yes this happens, people can talk for this long and since I personally know headcannon that Marinette is ADHD this long ass paragraph is just another Tuesday bud)
He sat there, surprised that she figured it all out so quickly. (yeah bub it’s called plot convenience and it’s because of me, the writer, I don’t wanna focus on secret ID shenanigans, I got other plans for yall, also Mari is smart, don’t underestimate her)
“You’re Robin,” she breathed, “they turned you into a bee. Wait- How the hell did they turn you into a bee?!”
He chuckled, “Bee-lieve me I’ve been asking myself that question for more than a year,”
She bit her lip, seemingly contemplating his words and ignoring his pun, “Tikki do you know anything that could help? Do you think Miraculous magic-,”
He felt his heart stop, he flew up to her face, flying at eye level, “Wait, did you just say Miraculous? Harley said if I could find the Guardian of the miraculous, they could help me, do you know where they are? I’ve been looking for so long,” (‘°;~*.plot convenience.*~;°’)
Marinette blinked at him and Tikki's face dawned with realization.
“I’m the guardian of the miraculous,” Marinette said softly, “Tikki, that means I can help him, right?”
Tikki nodded and he had to dial down the hope in his heart because the look on her face told him there was a Kim Kardashian sized butt on the way.
“We can help him, but we’re gonna have to wait. (don’t look at me like that, do u want them to have time to bond or not?) You’re not trained enough to pull it off yet. If you were to do it now, all three of us would be out of commission for far too long, especially with Hawkmoth on the prowl,” Tikki said.
They must’ve been able to sense his sadness because they were staring at him with an incredible amount of pity. The amount was quite unsettling actually and he suddenly felt a primal like urge to pun. (An extract from my book: “My unhealthy coping mechanisms and how to use them,” specifically Chapter 8: “Humor hides the pain”)
Suddenly Tikki’s face lit up, the whiplash of her expression change throwing any notion of punning out the window.
“Well, there’s one thing we could do,” she said, excitedly, zipping buzzing around “If he wears a miraculous, he'll return back to human form while transformed,”
Marinette perked up at the idea, but confusion soon overtook her features, “But Tikki, most of the miraculous are bigger than he is,”
Tikki waved her away,” It’s fine it’ll work,”
“Ok,” Marinette said after a bit of thought. She stood and he followed while she started climbing down her skylight,” I’m thinking you can try each of them out for different patrols and then we’ll see which one matches you best. This could be fun, having some fun sized company while figuring out how to defeat Hawkmoth,”
He laughed, flying near her ear, “Fun sized, huh? I’ll have you know I’m considered tall in human form, unlike some of us,”
She laughed and rolled her still tear stained eyes, and so, the beginning of a bee-autiful friendship bloomed.
Marinette walked to her closet and Jason took in her room. It was very pink, but in a well-balanced way - it wasn’t completely overbearing. His eye caught on a few pictures of Adrien Agreste on her wall but figured now wouldn’t be a great time to bring it up. (Look he’s already more emotionally aware, #foreshadowing of character development)
She removed a big box from her closet. She opened it and it was filled with what appeared to be a bunch of scrap materials. At the bottom she removed a bigger bundle of black and red fabric and he flew closer.
She put it in her lap and Jason had to do a double take when he realized that her hands were glowing and what the actual fuck- it was a box now -fuck fuck fuck- why was it a box? How? What- Jason was pretty sure he did not sign up for this.
She put the box down in front of her and to his relief she opened her mouth to speak as she lifted the lid, so he’d understand everyth- and its jewellery.
The box contained jewellery. Animal themed jewellery by the looks of things.
He then realized that these were probably the other miraculous.
She looked over each artefact before handing him the yellow and black hairclip.
Out of all of them, she picked the bee miraculous.
“Hilarious,” he replied dryly, giving her a look, he realized too late she wouldn’t be able to register- on account of, well you know… (if u don’t know by now, you don’t get to find out anymore)
She gave him a grin and replied, “I certainly think it is,”
Her teasing expression turned into one of worry, “I mean we could switch it out if it makes you uncomfortable-,” (being a sassy people pleaser with no filters really do be like this tho)
He laughed, “Don’t worry, I’m only teasing. What do I do?”
Marinette opened her mouth to answer before obviously realizing that she didn’t have an answer. She turned to Tikki and the kwami had a fond smile on her face before turning to Jason. (Just Tikki casually mentor- moming Mari because Fu is useless)
“Just step on the miraculous, it’ll sense that you’re human,” the creature replied.
When he stepped onto the bee miraculous, its kwami appeared.
Pollen stared at him for a few seconds before she realized what was happening.
After an explanation about her power set and what exactly he could do in suit, he transformed.
He felt his human body appearing. He was taller and more built than he remembered being. His flying clearly had physical consequences then, not that he was complaining.
His suit included a pair of bee wings. His hair was longer than he remembered it being too.
He had a black leather jacket and combat boots. With it was a pair of practical black leggings and a yellow t-shirt with three thick black stripes. (The three stripes represent each one of his families, the Todds, the Waynes and The Dupain-Chengs, because I can) He also had a pair of black gloves. His boots had yellow laces. On his face was a black and yellow striped domino mask. The top sat on his hip. The bee miraculous sat on the middle of his chest in the form of a broach.
He all but sprinted to the mirror. He stared at his face, his blue eyes and his nose that never healed quite right after breaking it that one time. His black hair was messy and stuck up every which way, his cheekbones were as high as always, and he had a little bit of stubble and it was so familiar and so new all at once.
He touched his face, barely registering the tears flowing down his cheeks and laughed in relief. He was human again. This was real! He could- he was closer to normal than he ever thought he’d get to be.
He turned to Marinette who was staring up at him in shock. He picked her up and spun her around, laughing in joy. And after a moment she joined in. He put her down and put his hands on her shoulders, smiling widely, “Thank you. Thank you so much,”
She smiled up at him, a slightly sad look on her face, “I’m sorry, it’s not permanent,”
“Don’t be sorry. For the first time I have hope. It will be permanent eventually, and till then, I have you with me, right?” he squeezed her shoulder, still high on the feeling of hope and warmth and familiarity.
When he was overcome with the sudden urge to pull her into a hug, he didn’t resist.
He held her close, resting his chin on her head, “Damn, I missed this. Hugging, I mean. I haven’t... it’s been so long,” (not that he got all that many hugs from Bruce “emotionally constipated” Wayne)
She wrapped her arms around him, “I can imagine,”
They stood there a while before the time for patrol came along. She transformed and they made their way to the Eiffel tower, where they met Chat.
The cat themed hero rose his brow questioningly, “I thought we didn’t recruit new heroes unless it was an emergency?”
Ladybug smiled nonchalantly, “It’s Guardian business, he’s gonna be a permanent fixture in our team for at least a few months so we might as well get used to working as a team,”
Chat Noir eyed him wearily and he stepped forward, sticking his hand out, “Hi, I’m Blackback, nice to meet you,”
Chat Noir shook his hand and gave Ladybug a sceptical look, “An American? Really?”
“Please Chat, he's not American, it’s just the glamour hiding his actual accent,” she replied simply, shooting Jason a worried look.
He couldn’t give away his identity, but he was also technically a bee, he didn’t really have an identity to give away. So, her behaviour was strange. Unless she wanted to give him an identity somehow?
He couldn’t stop thinking about it for the rest of patrol.
When they got home Marinette revealed that she wanted to give him the fox miraculous. If they asked Trixx she would be able to design the costume in a way that allowed him to look like a normal civilian, without the mask.
Trixx's glamour was also stronger than the rest so his true identity as Jason Todd would be protected.
And she could help him fake an accent.
Since Marinette was a year younger than him he could just pick up where he left off school wise.
She convinced her parents that he was an exchange student in desperate need of a place to stay because the person he would’ve stayed with backed out last minute.
They agreed easily and Jason decided to not question it.
It was his third family. His second if you only counted non abusive ones. First if you wanted one with a healthy family dynamic.
They got him a fake birth certificate and name. He went with the alias Thomas Grayson. He thought it was kind of funny, and it paid homage to both Bruce and Dick. It gave him something from home to hold on to. (Jason isn’t really salty about not being avenged in this au, he didn’t die and Talia and the pit madness wasn’t there to egg on his anger. But maybe if I ever get back to this au we could do a thing with it… guess we’ll have to wait and see ;-) no promises tho)
He built himself another home with Marinette and her family. And before he knew it, he was happy again. He felt secure.
Through the weeks, he ingrained himself into Marinette's life. In a blink of an eye, they were best friends, and he couldn’t imagine life without her.
He loved living with her family as she trained to be strong enough to turn him back to normal.
He grew close to Marinette’s friends and was her shoulder to cry on about Adrien. He and Adrien got along pretty well, and he and Marc and Rose traded Literature jokes. Max would join in when it involved Shakespeare.
Then Lila happened. (She’s a staple in Maribat fiction. U can’t have Maribat without Lila. Or well u can but that’s usually a very specific au)
Her lies started out simple enough. Then she started manipulating everyone and he, Marinette, Chloe and Adrien were one scheme away from being ostracized. They sat in the back row.
They ignored her sneers and let her lie to her heart’s content. Then one day she said something that made both Marinette and Jason freeze.
“You know, I was childhood friends with Jason Todd (I know she usually gets the names wrong but like her knowing the name just makes this next bit better) You know, Bruce Wayne’s ward who died a while ago? It was just so sad. He grew up in a nice family but his parents both died in a car accident and Brucie took pity on him. He even let us keep in contact afterwards, since our parents were such good friends. We all miss them dearly of course. We were neighbours the year we lived in Gotham, you know? We'd play every day-,” she started fake crying, “Oh it just gets too much sometimes,”
But to Jason’s shock Alya didn’t move to console Lila, in fact, she was staring at the brunette in shock.
He turned his gaze to Marinette to see the girl wearing the biggest, coldest, most satisfied smirk. She rested her chin on her hands and grinned at Lila in a way that made shivers go down his spine.
He turned back, this ought to be good.
And it was.
Alya absolutely lost it.
She ripped Lila a new one and frankly? Jason was impressed. (Alya has a temper and she’s a fangirl, and we all know how we get when someone gets something wrong about one of our hyperfixations, even if it’s an old one so like yall can imagine how bad Lila had fucked up)
When an akuma flew in towards Lila, Alya grabbed it, staring the girl down with a fury he didn’t know she could possess, “Don’t you dare! Do you think I’m blind? I’ve seen how easily you get akumatized and this time I’m not letting it happen!”
Of course, Alya then got akumatized but hey it beat another version of Lila.
Everyone made up but they weren’t quite as close as before. Their group tended to consist mostly out of him, Marinette, Chloe, Adrien, Kagami and Luka.
Other than that incident and akuma attacks, life was pretty good.
In fact, it was great.
He and Marinette would spend nights on her balcony, laughing and slow dancing. They star gazed and went on patrols. He helped her when she got nightmares and she returned the favour. They went on long walks and spent the holidays together. They crammed for tests and he played model for her designs. They worked in the bakery and hung out with their friends both in and out of suit. They’d joke about his technical bee-ness and he and Chat drove her mad with puns. In retaliation she’d introduce him as her bee friend to people or only give him honey and bee themed things. (ok this sentence sounds weird but I mean like when she brings them sweets from the bakery to snack on while working and stuff.)
And one laugh, memory and fight at a time, he started to fall. (I just want good things for Jason, and really can you blame me?)
Through the months, he kept up to date on the news about Bruce Wayne and Marinette held his hand each time a new kid joined his brood. She reminded him that no child could be replaced and reassured him that of course Bruce would want him back when they figured everything out.
And if he didn’t, she’d kick his ass into space, and he’d stay with her family in Paris- a family she made sure he knew he was a part of.
He helped Sabine in the kitchen and was the only one who came closest to beating Marinette’s Ultimate Mega Strike 3 record. Tom taught him to shave and bake. He was integrated into their family and they treated him as part of the family.
But even if they were giving him everything they were, he missed Bruce. And Dick. And Alfred. And Barbara. And Gotham. He missed them all so much. He missed home.
So, 14 months later, when Marinette told him they had a meeting with the Justice League about the Hawkmoth situation, Jason felt his heart skip a beat.
“What?” he asked softly, his eyes brimming with tears (Marinette taught him how to emotion, you see. So Jason is emotionally stable-ish enough to cry without feeling embarrassed about it), “I get to see him again?”
Marinette nodded and hugged him from behind, “I’m planning on telling him what happened. Is there anything you can tell him to verify who you are?”
Memories from a million years ago entered his mind, “Yes,”
She took his hand and took a step back, “And I think I can fix you before we go, I’m strong enough. But I’d still like your help in the final battle, I mean I know you’re going home but...,”
He tucked a strand of her hair behind her ear and smiled, “Of course, Pixie. I’ll always be there for you when you need me,”
He pressed a kiss against her forehead, a movement so familiar it was practically a part of him. He pulled her close and cried into her hair.
“What if he doesn’t believe me?” he asked softly, after a while, resting his chin on top of her head.
“He will,” she replied, tightening her grip around his waist.
They both knew she had no guarantee of that. That she had no way of knowing for sure. Neither of them did. And it scared him more than he wanted to admit.
The next day they do the magic turning back thing. It freaks him out quite a bit but not as much as her revealing the miraculous freaked him out the first time, you get kinda used to the magic shenaniganary. They’re both passed out for an hour afterwards and when they wake up, he holds her, crying, because he was finally, finally back to normal and this was real and permanent, and it was over.
She cried with him and held him, and they then went out and he wore a shirt she made for him, and they got ice cream the next day. They celebrated some more and went to the park with the squad and they had a picnic.
It was better than he ever could've imagined.
While the sun was setting, they stood back on her balcony, where they first spoke all those months ago, slow dancing. He pulled away and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and smiled at her as the orange light of the sunset shone on them. (So aesthetic)
“Thank you, Marinette, for everything,” he says as he rubs his thumb across her cheek. His hand holding her face. She puts her hand over his and closes her eyes, savouring the moment.
She opened her eyes again and smiled, “I’d do it again and more, if it meant I’d get to be with you,”
He started leaning down, “If I lost you, I’d fly all over the world just to find you again,”
She raised to her tip toes, faces millimetres from one another, blue bells meeting ice, “So it was all worth it in the end?”
He moves closer, eyes searching hers. “Definitely,” he breathes.
She closes the distance, and he picks her up and spins her around. They break apart and their laughter fills the air.
(now that’s enough fluff, allow me to drown you in angst)
The next day they stood on the Eiffel tower. She took his hand, “Let’s recap. I go in, we have our Hawkmoth meeting, then I ask if I can speak to Batman and Nightwing alone. Then I tell them I found you, then I give them – are you sure it’s necessary for me to give them your blood, hair and a cheek swab? Isn’t that overkill?” (Batman is serious about his no kill rule, but he’s also serious about his there’s no such thing as overkill rule)
He shook his head and she sighed, “Okay. Then I give him means to contact me and I come back. Now remember they might take a while to process and they won’t necessarily call immediately-,”
“What if they never call?” he asked, gripping her hand tightly.
She ran her finger softly through his hair, “Then you have us to help you get through it,”
He nodded, she kissed his cheek and stepped through the portal with Queen Bee, Chat Noir and Viperion. He and Ryuuko stayed behind as backup, he wielded the Fox miraculous these days, but kept the name Blackback, always wearing a black leather jacket no matter the transformation.
He and Ryuko discussed fighting styles, she was kindly trying to distract him, and if it had been anything else he needed distracting from, it would’ve worked.
So passed the slowest forty-five minutes of his life. Chat Noir and Queen Bee exit a portal and so the wait for Marinette and Luka began.
She and Bruce were talking now. Bruce would know he was alive. This was make or break for him. Luka was nearby to act as back up worst-case scenario.
He felt a hand on his shoulder, followed by someone taking and rubbing circles on his back. He looked down to see Ryuuko on his one side and saw Chat Noir on his other.
“We’ve got you,” Chloe said standing in front of him, hand on his unoccupied shoulder.
He swallowed and nodded. She squeezed his upper arm and met his gaze, “Breathe, you’re safe, honey,”
So, 30 more minutes pass. They sit down and somewhere along the line Chat goes and grabs a dozen croissants from the bakery.
In another situation he might’ve laughed. He’d baked this morning’s batch and now he got to eat some of it for free, of course, technically he could get others for free too but-
The portal opened behind them and Ladybug and Viperion stepped out. He noted that she didn’t have the bag of his DNA with her anymore.
She smiled softly at him, “Now we wait,”
And wait they did.
They waited two weeks.
And then the burner phone that's number they'd given Bruce rang.
Jason froze, Marinette jumped up and ran to get it.
He couldn't move as she walked over and put the phone on speaker, she grabbed his hand and he held onto her for dear life.
"We can both hear you now, Nightwing," she said.
There was a beat of silence on the other side of the line, "Can he- If you're- can I speak to him? In- um- private?"
Marinette looked at him, and he nodded. She took the phone off speaker and handed it to him.
He held it up to his ear and squeezed his eyes shut, focusing on the circles Marinette were drawing on his hand with her thumb.
"He- hey Dick," he said. He heard his brother's breathing hitch, followed by a few seconds of silence.
"When did Batman find you?"
"25th May 2017,"
"Who's your favourite author?"
"Mary Shelley tied with Jane Austin,” he replied.
Dick stayed silent for too long and before he could stop himself the words fell from his mouth, desperation clinging to each syllable,” My favourite- my favourite playwright is Shakespeare, and my favourite school subject is English. If I could pick any day job it would be being a writer. My favourite colour is blue. Alfred has a secret fear of dolphins. You have had a ridiculously huge crush on Barbara for years and she had no idea, and I found a picture you drew under your old room's bedside table of you two getting married. I folded the picture up and hid it in a small box of memories I kept in the farthest corner of my closet under clothes I never wore. I have a round scar on the lower left side of my back where Willis Todd burned me with a cigarette when I was 5 that you don’t know I know you know about. My first Christmas at the manor you found me in the rose garden cutting a few off to take to my mother's grave and I was terrified that you would yell at me but instead you drove me to the graveyard and that was the day I decided to give you a real chance. I despise carrots but I eat them when Alfred makes them because I don't want to be a burden. And I-," he choked on a sob- when had he started crying?
He took a shuddering breath, and swallowed some of his tears, trying to make sure the words got out right, "I've missed you guys for every single second that I've been gone,"
His stomach tied itself up in a million knots as the silence stretched on. He could hear Dick moving the phone.
"Can I speak to Ladybug again please?" A female voice he didn't recognize said.
He handed the phone to Marinette and pressed his hand over his mouth to try to contain the sobs. He felt like a knife was twisting his stomach. He couldn't even hear what Marinette was saying. (I’m going through something irl and as a result u guys get to read angst by the bucketloads and I regret nothing)
Dick didn't want to talk to him. He should've just answered the question, he shouldn't have given all the extra information. Now they were never going to believe that it's really him and he would never see them again. Maybe they knew it was him and they just didn't want him-
"Jason, breathe with me," he heard Marinette's voice. His eyes latched onto hers like a lifeline, he became aware of her hands holding his.
She took his face in her hands and rested her forehead against his, in a motion so familiar that it came as easy as breathing. Well as easy as it usually was to breathe, right now excluded.
After he calmed down, she explained to him what they discussed. They would go to Gotham and meet and discuss things from there.
They wanted to meet him, but they still didn’t completely believe that it was him. He knew this for a fact because they had organized for M’gann to be there to confirm what he was saying. (Yassss M'gann my darling girl, I adore out lil Martian)
Marinette had suggested that they meet in the Batcave in an hour. Everyone had agreed. He assumed she had a plan as to why she wanted to wait. And he trusted her, so he waited for her to explain.
“I want to take the team, as backup. If you’re not comfortable with it, I want to at least take Luka. I would suggest just letting one of us wield is miraculous, but his Second Chance Timer limit is an hour so it would be most beneficial,” she said, gesturing with the hand that wasn’t holding his.
He nodded, sitting up straighter, but not releasing his grip on her hand, “We can bring the team, it’s smart to have backup. Besides if things go haywire, we have Luka to stop us.”
“Then let’s go get our team, love,”
(oh, I should probably mention that only he and LB knows everyone’s Identities. Or well rather no one knows like officially. Like everyone lowkey knows everyone's and a few of them have officially revealed themselves to each other, but not everyone is officially revealed to everyone and Mari and Jason are the only ones who aren’t officially revealed to anyone else, it’s kinda like the vibes of knowing your best friend is queer but not saying anything because they haven’t officially come out yet but like you know because they ain’t nearly as subtle as they think. Like that aesthetic.)
Anyway, 50 minutes later, they’re all gathered on the Eiffel Tower. Jason saw Marinette give Luka a nod to reset his timer. Suddenly he was enveloped in a light with a scratch that wasn’t there a few seconds before on his cheek, his expression quite annoyed.
Marinette immediately furrowed her brows, “How many times?”
Viperion shook his head, “Don’t worry, only one so far, but they try to restrain us. We’re gonna have to try plan b this time,” Everyone nodded, they waited two minutes before the agreed upon time and Mari opened a portal, but instead of appearing out in the opened, they hid in the shadowy parts of the cave.
Jason used his illusion to hide them from any observant eyes and they spread out a bit. He and Mari stayed together, Cloe flew to get a higher perspective and hide Viperion on one of the cave’s many ledges while Chat just moved a few feet away to have a slightly different hiding spot. Kagami dropped into her wind form and was flying above them to eavesdrop, she’d go to Luka if she heard anything of importance so he could go restart again.
They’d be one step ahead of the Bats no matter what they pulled, after all, they had all the time in the world.
They watched them all get into position as time neared. Jason didn’t know all the kids but recognized them from the news.
Dick, Bruce and M’gann stood near the bat computer with Barbara – who was in a wheelchair but that was a realization to deal with later- and Alfred.
The minute they were supposed to appear Jason cast another illusion to make it appear as though they had arrived. As expected, weapons and restraints immediately swarmed on them, each kid going for a different miraculous member. Too bad the images turned into orange dust as soon as they touched them.
The tiny one in the Robin uniform was red in the face and immediately started throwing a tantrum, “Father! They’ve tricked us-,”
Before he could get another word out, Chloe mass-venomed the horde of kids that we’re sent to attack them. He counted Black bat, Red Robin, Batgirl, Signal and Robin. They were all frozen in the middle of the room and before the others near the computer could move, Kagami trapped them in a (rather large) ring of fire. They had enough space to move around comfortably but if they tried approaching the edge the flames would grow larger.
Batman growled and his eyes searched through the cave, but he wouldn’t see them, no matter how hard he searched.
Jason stared at them. Dick was also searching the cave, but he seemed to look more hopeful than angry. Alfred seemed his usual calm self and Barbara was glancing around the cave more subtly. He didn’t bother looking at the rest of the batkids because M’gann was staring right at him, staying right where she was despite her ability to fly.
“Hi, Jason,” she softly spoke into his mind, he felt emotion overwhelm him, she’d known him before everything, and she knew it was him and it was a lot.
He knew she wasn’t probing around his brain for information like he was sure Bruce had asked her to, she didn’t have to, she knew it was him.
“Can you please tell me why we’re surrounded by fire?” she asked.
“We have a time traveller,” he replied.
“Ah, not a fan of Bruce’s restrain and question method, then? Can’t say I blame you, though I do think you’ve proven your point,”
“You really think it’s a good idea to release all of them?” he asked sceptically.
“… Good point. Maybe leave the brood in the middle in whatever frozen state they’re in and just let us in the fire out. They really just think it’s too good to be true… Jason, I won’t let them hurt you,”
“Okay,” he agreed softly. He turned to Marinette and gave her a slight nod. She returned with one of her own.
They walked over to Kagami’s ring of fire and he held their illusion until they were right in front of it. He held on to it for a bit to make sure everyone else would be able to stay in position. Chloe would keep the cavalry venomized and Chat and Viperion would stick to the shadows, unless necessary.
Jason dropped the illusion and watched four heads snap to him. M'gann simply gave him a soft smile and a nod of encouragement.
Kagami moved herself to stand next to Marinette and turned back into her human form, glaring at them with a silent warning.
Their attention was elsewhere, though. For a long time they just stood there and stared at one another in silence. They studied every part of one another they could see.
His eyes caught on Barbara’s wheelchair and he felt ready to destroy whatever put her there. She met his eyes and he held her gaze. She must’ve seen something there because she gave a small smile as she allowed a few tears to escape her eyes.
“Miss Martian?” Batman broke the silence like a cheap dinner plate, shattering it in a matter of seconds.
“It’s him,” M’gann answered without a hint of hesitation.
It was Alfred that moved first. He took a few hesitant steps towards him and before Jason knew it the man was in front of him. Alfred reached out and put a hand on his shoulder, desperately studying him for a moment before pulling him into a hug only Alfred could give.
It took Jason a moment to respond but when he did he returned it wholeheartedly.
After a few minutes they pulled apart and it took him a moment to realize that they’d both started crying. When he looked up Dick was only a few feet away. The moment Alfred stepped away Dick pulled him close.
“I thought you were dead, kid. I thought I’d never see you again, I thought I lost even more family. You were too young, too innocent. Fuck Jason,” Dick whispered, tightening his grip, “I’m so glad you’re alive,”
Jason held on to his brother and that night they cried about terrible endings and broken beginnings. They cried about lost time and found family.
It wasn’t the end yet, Hawkmoth was still terrorizing Paris and he had no idea what Bruce thought yet. There were all his other kids, his brothers and sisters. There were his teammates and the incredible story of how he’d been turned into a bee of all things.
They had a lot of catching up to do.
But just for a moment, a strand of a singular moment, he had his brother in his arms again and he was back home. His first real home.
Things weren’t perfect, as things rarely are but it didn’t matter. Because part of the beauty of life is how it builds and breaks us in a cycle of love and loss.
And that night they laughed with a lightness and joy none of them had fully been able to hold onto in years.
I hope you guys enjoyed!
This is lowkey totally gonna be the au I go to when I don’t know what to write lol, maybe write a bit of what happens afterwards or a part of everything during the year he lived with Mari them or just y’know shenanigans
#maribat#jason todd#marinette dupain cheng#jasonette#bee movie au#aka the deep dark hole within the deep dark hole#I've been working on this for a month#probably more#my brain held me captive with this au it held me at gunpoint and stalked me and wouldn't leave me alone until i wrote it#me: casually attempting to write anything else#my brain: *slaps me with ideas for this* NO#and the worst part is there's more that's not written just bull my brain came up with#and i can't believe I put angsty life philosophy writing in a CRACK AU#THIS IS THE VERY DEFINITION OF A CRACK AU#WHY#I AM SO INVESTED AND I'M MAD ABOUT IT#i enjoyed writing this and that fact alone infuriates me#blame moonie for this#and u know what blame bugabunny too#(fuck i hope i got their name right)#if it hadn't been for the two of them discussing this again i would've forgotten all about it and i woulda been allowed to write#my kaldur x marinette fic in peace. or my lila time loop fic. OR LITERALLY ANYTHING ELSE#anyway i tried to make his outfit red hood esque but like only the parts i liked about it#aka the leather jacket and the combat boots#I don't know how i feel about the fact that i wrote this but what's done is done#*sigh*#jason x marinette#why me#nightwing fluff#but also angst
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so,,,some of you wouldn't mind some fic recs so here's me recommending my favorite lawlight fics you probably have read before but i ramble about it anyway. here you go :
and indeed there will be time (incomplete/abandoned?)
Soulmate AU where you stop aging at 18 until you meet your soulmate. I'd say this is my favorite fanfiction of all time. Seriously. Doesn't make me cry hard but makes me cry repeatedly. The emotions, the bitterweetness, the writing, the characterization, the yearning UGHH. It's just out of this world. Every morning I check on this fic in case it's not abandoned after all bcs I have more hope on an update of this fic than life itself.
white chocolate roses (completed) & romance (oneshot sequel)
AU where Light is a cardiologist and L is his terminally ill patient. I didn't know what I expected, but I did not expect crying so hard that i still cry sometimes when i think abt it. The characterization is AMAZING and don't get me started with the writing. If you can tell what's gonna happen just by looking at the description and you can't take heavy angst, I don't think this fic is for you (srsly if someone warn me i'd never read it). But the last paragraph of romance tho....
This is How I Disappear (completed)
Canon divergence where L wins and Light is executed. You might know about this one, as you should. It's a genfic, but holy shit FEELS. Pure pain and beautiful writing, amazing characterization and oh my poor little heart. Even the description of light's bedroom made me weep. The relationship between soichiro and light really hits hard. It also explores L's feelings towards light, and it's very very canon. Simply one of the best dn fanfiction out there, really.
(more under the cut bcs it's long)
Seeking His Hand (incomplete)
Historical AU where L is a gentry seeking Light's hands for marriage. Regency era hoes come get your juice. Seriously, I'd sell my left lung to read this fic for the first time again. It'll bring you so much happiness for being the most romantic lawlight fic ever, and is really good. It's in character as far as historical au can go. the sexual tension between this two oh my god I can't wait, this one is amazing.
Of Music (incomplete/abandoned?)
AU where Light is a stressed college student who loves orchestra shows and meets L, their relationship grows through every show they attend. There's a lot of complication but not too dramatic, it's like enemies to lovers and friends to lovers being mushed together perfectly. Very interesting and oh my god the sexual tension between them and the teasings...i can't even. Misa's only here for like 5 seconds but holy shit i want to marry her. Probs abandoned but you can see the last chapter as an ending or open ending at least.
sugar and pumpkin spice (oneshot)
The best lawlight coffee shop AU. Seriously, you'll love it. As you can tell, I'm a fluff person and this...this is my comfort fic. The one that makes me slam the table after reading and screamed "I WANT MORE OF THESE KIND OF SHIT". Really heartwarming, really sweet, probably not for everyone because of that, but it is def written for me.
Silver Bells (oneshot)
About L and Light spending a real fucking soft christmas day as a married couple. You know i have a certain weakness for ships being married AND christmas. It is a win win but very fucking underrated. I love that it still includes the kira past but don't specify the redemption (the way i love my fix it/happy canon divergence). This is just golden and domestic and soft and i cried reading and rereading it.
One Last Night (oneshot)
Divorce. That's it that's the plot. But oh it will break your heart, build it, and break it again. This one is just...beautiful. the wording...the characterization- the pain. I'm not feeling the best while writing this so...i dont want to explain further i ignore tw for this i almost say it's worth it but pls don't do that so just go read it yourself, it's 👌👌
Change Of Circumstances (oneshot)
Another comfort fic. About Light being a Wammy's kid, building a friendship with L over the years until they fall in love. Seriously, we(me) need more Wammy!Light. This one is just cute. I don't know what to say other than it's just sooo adorable how they build a really strong connection and then fall in love. Childhood friends to lovers isn't the best au for lawlight imo but this one nailed it.
Wedding Date (oneshot)
About L and Light in Sayu's wedding. It's romantic in a lawlight way yknow. I just can't describe it but this fic makes me feel good. I mean, what a dream, to be in a wedding date amirite? And damn the yagami siblings really love the english (yes im quoting a song).
so there you go...i really am rambling. they're my favorite favorite lawlight fics and i have MORE (oneshots bcs it's hard to read multichap these days). but lmk if you want another one. you can tell my fic taste in here lmao but yeah that's all for me exposing my sappy ass.
#death note#lawlight#yes ik most of these are no death note au#im escaping#and a sap#i really am a rambling mess in here skgdhs im sorry#fic recs#light yagami#l lawliet
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massive thank you to my followers for getting me to this milestone, and also to everyone who sent in fics!! while i can’t confess to having read all of these works (i’m getting there tho) each comment is from the person who submitted it 💛 i’ve decided to keep this up as a regular thing, hopefully to be able to traffic some more readers to lesser known writers too so keep an eye out for that link
these have been listed in the order i received them, multi chapter works have either the masterlist or first chapter linked, please pay attention to warnings on the individual works
@bee-dameron - kair’ta - din/reader - this is one of my own recs, the original holder of my din djarin loving heart, ellie knows what they’ve done to me.
@keeper0fthestars - would you let me - din/reader - again, a rec of mine, solely responsible for planting tattooed!din in my head. a concept which haunts me daily.
@thosewickedlovelies - into the woods - frankie/reader - my beloved rachael took a middle of the night shitpost of mine and turned it into something truly beautiful, i can’t wait to see where it goes.
@anxiety-riddled-mando - shereshoy - mando!oc/reader - the last of my suggested fics, lives rent free in my head and the only thing i will accept as canon. jon favreau who??
@firstofficerwiggles - caretaker - din/reader - It's my fic so this is a hard question to answer but I think the story's strengths are it's romance and the blend of other elements like humor and action.
@heatherbel - desideratum - din/reader - Gorgeous poetic romance with Din Djarin.
@jura-moon - chrysalis - din/reader - The most beautiful slow burn one shot you will ever read. Jura's writing is beyond special. Sweet, emotional, sexy gorgeousness in fic form.
@wille-zarr - in fields of white - din/reader - I wrote it lolllll jshshdhs.
@papercinders - enigma - obi wan/reader - the description of everything!! im not gonna make sense but gosh the author hooks you with the first chapter and drags you along by the neck for the next four
@waatermelon-sugaar - want to kiss? - poe/reader - So sexy 🥵.
@michaelperry - amidst the to and fro - din/reader - It’s a rebel!Din Djarin AU fic that is such a cool what-if idea and is written so beautifully. Din’s characterization is perfect and the whole thing is super sweet and soft. It’s one of my favorite fics I’ve read recently (tbh everything I’ve read of hers so far is amazing).
@maharani-radha-writes - cultural differences - javier/reader - It’s wonderful to be able to experience a little bit of someone else’s culture! And Javi doing his best to accommodate and understand is great to see!
@pumpkin-stars - waiting - frankie/reader - this fic has everything, angst, absolutely staggering symbolism, talk of death, frankie morales and the origin of his iCONIC hat (need i say more) (yes I will), heartache, taking chances, more angst, acceptance, a love confession, a happy ending. This fic is written with such care and empathy it is easily one of my fave frankie fics <3.
@katlikeme - it’s all the same down in the capital - reader + clones - Kat knows my whole heart belongs to her because this fic and i get all weepy just thinking about it.
@fromthedeskoftheraven - visions of sugarplums - jack/reader - being snowed in with Jack Daniels and his endless list of sweet pet names for you. And the pining!
@mourningbirds1 - the crossroads i’m standing at - javier/steve - Javier peña and steve murphy and all the yearning and pining possible <3.
@miceenscene - star-crossed - din/ofc - din djarin soulmate au that takes your breath away.
@filthybookworm - nothing more and nothing different - frankie/reader - the most beautiful character study of frankie morales and his love languages
@ladylothlorien - oberyn is our greatest post-punk novelist - oberyn/reader - beautifully written modern!oberyn.
@itssmashedavo - mary magdalene - javier/ofc - Incredible OC, excellent pacing and very good writing. 10/10 would recommend.
@corellianhounds - geroya - din + covert - The cutest slice of life Mando fic that I can’t stop thinking about. A lovely unique look at Din from the POV of the covert foundlings.
@millllenniawrites - warmth - poe/reader - love how Poe is portrayed in all their fics, but this one especially as it's such a slow build, and I can really feel everything when I read it! Also sex pollen is one of my favourite tropes ngl.
@brandyllyn - doppelgänger - nathan/reader - Wow - everything. This fic is just- so perfect! I love how Nathan makes an AI of himself (and believes that everyone would fuck themselves, given the chance) - that is one os the most in-character things I've ever seen Nathan do in fic - it's just perfect! Also love how bad Nathan is in bed at first, and the ending is so hot. Love love love this fic, I reread it regularly.
@youvebeenlivingfictional - don’t treat my love like a habit - santiago/reader - I love reading this series because I love how the characters develop, and how their relationships change over time too. I love the imagery in this fic and its such a comfort read. (Also there needs to be an honourary mention of Magnetic too, by the same author as it has excellent slow-burn pacing).
@woakiees - mistakes and sour grapes - poe/reader - I love how, although its modern-day Poe, it also does a really good job of showing Poe's struggles as he tries to adapt to civilian life. I also really enjoy the slow build between the two of them and Finn's friendship with the reader (also it's made me desperate to try a chocolate cake shot lol).
@woakiees - and you keep me holding on - santiago/reader - it made me cry so much!!! the emotion, the days counting, the pain of poor Santi, just everything its so good
@brandyllyn - to sell your love for peace - javier/reader - omg ok. the writing in this was so good, and the foreshadowing was excellent - the whole time, I had a sneaking suspicion of what was going to happen, but the clues were so expertly scattered in that I had just convinced myself I was wrong when... (AAAAHHHH I screamed you have no idea it was so good).
@writingletterstothefire - she loves me - santiago/reader - the suspense! I love knowing things that the characters dont and I cant wait to find out how they react! I really enjoy this authors writing too.
@witchyavenger - coffee - richard/reader - how sweet it is!! I just wanna give Richard some love too, he deserves the world, (and the moodpboard for this fic is so good also).
#big forehead kisses for anyone who sent their own work in!!! we love to see it!!!!#liz's follower celebration!!#fic recs#good words#also if u don't see ur rec here lmk and i'll be happy to let u know why#the mandalorian#star wars#narcos#triple frontier
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blink, i am not gonna like, you are intriguing me about untamed
ahhhhsdhfdshjhjdfs omg it’s so good L pls pls join me i’ll copy paste the pitch i give everyone
the untamed aka chen qing ling (陈情令)
one season, 50 episodes, 45 minutes each, found on netflix or we tv or youtube, adapted off of the web novel mo dao zu shi (魔道祖师) by moxiang tongxiu
other adaptations include: the donghua (animated), the manhua (comic/graphic novel), the chibi series (animated), the audio drama, and the cql video game
60% classic tragedy, 40% buddy cop mystery, 100% yearning and found family (and so !!!! many!!!!! sibling!!!!!!! relationships!!!!!!!!!!!)
your faves WILL die but the rest of ur faves will live (and one fave will do both)
your faves are terrifyingly competent and also deeply fundamentally stupid. the duality of man.
chosen soulmates main characters, in the sense of "my equal on every level, the one who knows me best, the one who hears the melody of my heart"
said soulmates have a song that one of them wrote the other, the title is literally their ship name, it plays whenever they so much as look at each other on screen
yearning, pining, miscommunication, coparenting, non-verbal communication, protecting each other on the battlefield, what more do you want
the timeline spans multiple generations, so you not only get to witness the consequences of their actions, but you also get to see your faves take care of kids!! and you get to see each generation grow better and kinder than the last!
themes of: justice, black-and-white morality, found family, corrupt political/societal systems, the price of war, where is the line between guilty and innocent?, why you should treat people who work in customer service nicely, classism, sacrifice, rebirth, unconditional love, truth and lies, multigenerational trauma, breaking the cycle of abuse, and more !
it's funny as fuck!!!!
u get to laugh at classic cdrama sfx <3 (real talk tho i think they sacrificed sfx in favour of emotional storytelling + good costume/set design so i am 1000% okay with this)
banger soundtrack
all of them can b read as queer and many ships can be had
the dark scenes are actually well-lit and visible!!! (with the exception of one but u don't need to see it to cry)
cinnamon topography (but rlly so much analysis to b found in the camera angles and framing and colour symbolism)
so many parallels and motifs u could throw a dart at any time stamp and write a hundred and one essays about that scene
a rlly interesting study in cause and consequence bc like a million things led up to each moment but u can also go back down the timeline and be like. Hm. what if This happened instead and the whole timeline would change so it's a super cool thing to explore in fic
the fic and art in the fandom FUCK (might i direct you to my all time favourite fic: the wangxian time war au with banger lines such as "i woke up that morning to an absence of you, and the loss was maddening. it nearly undid me. is it any wonder, then, that our words for love and loss are shaped the same way in our mouths?" and "here is a lie i have told—it was not my first lie, nor will it be the last. but it lingers with me, and it reminds me of you, so i suppose that is all that matters." and more!)
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season one of she-ra rated by catradora content
the sword part 1: right off the bat we find out just what adora’s all about. she’s a so called goody two shoes but she’ll lie to authority to protect catra.... ok lesbian lmao. but then we meet catra and she’s like “hey adora ;) how’s it hanging?” and we get it. we completely get it. oh my god. everything from the way catra talks to the way she laughs. adora never stood a chance :( we get a classic locker room flirting scene where catra teases adora and adora pretends she’s above all that only to be like hey cat gf is that a MOUSE which is very rude :( don’t scare ur cat gf or she will become evil :( oh wait. anyway.... their flirting gets cut short because homophobia walks in and separates them :/ before that tho she praises adora. adora who loves her gf so much ignores shadow weaver’s praise and says “catra did so good tho <3” and puts her arm around catra which pisses off the only homophobe in etheria. adora doesn’t really want to follow shadow weaver because she just wants to be with catra, and she even argues with shadow weaver about bringing catra onto the field with her. but she loses the argument because shadow weaver fucking sucks and has no idea how to be chill :/ catra finds adora after that and greets adora the way all gals greet their pals. by... pouncing on her waist. ok lol. catra is so proud of her gf getting promoted and says baby i love you <3 baby when are we leaving <3 except adora says catra’s not allowed to come :( so cat gf gets sad and runs to the roof. in response, adora gets a literal Grappling Hook to chase after her. adora doesn’t want her gf to be sad so she steals a skiff and they go on a date <3 but they’re so obsessed with control and play fighting with each other that adora falls off the skiff and finds out she’s like. god with a sword. i mean she-ra. uh, so adora fake wakes up in a dream and is like catra? :( because catra is the only thing she ever looks for when she wakes up (yes i am clowning. of course i know catra was the only person she was with but shhhh), and then she wakes up for real and catra is straddling her waist, which... ok. catra worries about her gf maybe being brain damaged so they cut their date short and go back to the fright zone. they go to sleep, and have their nightly sleepover, which means they sleep in the same bed :) even tho catra’s own bed is already on top of adora’s :) superb :) anyway adora dreams about her lesbian sword and wakes up scared. she smiles when she sees catra sleeping soundly in her bed however because uwu cat gf go zzzzz. adora gets out of bed which catra IMMEDIATELY senses because she opens her eyes right after and follows adora. because uh.... their friendship is just that lit and strong. catra is worried and wants to follow her gf to find this cool lesbian sword she keeps talking about, but adora makes perhaps one of the worst calls ever and tells catra to stay behind because she doesn’t want to get catra in trouble :( which is like, she has good intentions and all, but you should always bring your gymnast cat gf along when u look for sick ass gay swords. adora would know that if she wasn’t raised by the literal embodiment of gay oppression. oh well. guess they’re gonna have to fight each other for five seasons to figure it out. 9.5/10 because we got so much content all literally in the first ep. it’s like hey look they’re in love and they’re girlfriends who touch each other way too much. and we’re like noelle that’s really cool! will we get more gf content? and noelle said yes but also you’ve got a big storm coming! and it’s going to kill you!
the sword part 2: against adora’s wishes, catra gets in trouble for adora’s departure, and this makes catra sad bc where did her gf go? :( shadow weaver accuses catra of knowing where adora is because despite her raging homophobia she still knows that adora wouldn’t go anywhere without telling catra. and she’s right but just because she’s right doesn’t mean i have to like her. anyway... catra gets sent to bring adora back to the fright zone, and even tho shadow weaver threatens her in scary horrid ways catra is only happy to see adora again and once again pins her to the ground with her knees on adora’s.... yea........ and she’s happy bc she has a tank :) good for u catra we all love and cherish you <3333 anyway catra makes fun of adora because she thought adora got captured which... technically true but also not but also! catra sees a flower in adora’s hair which she takes to mean that adora cheated on her :( wtf :( and adora says no baby :( no i didn’t cheat on u :( and catra is like. ok fine. let’s go back to the horde. and adora says baby we can’t go back to the horde :( did u know that they were evil? im woke now. come be woke with me. and catra is like. wait. u just realized the horde sucks? did you not see shadow weaver electrocute me. did you think she did that for gay rights? and adora is like catra baby i didn’t mean it like that :( but it’s too late. it’s all very upsetting and i don’t wanna get into it. essentially catra thinks she can escape shadow weaver’s abuse by fighting the horde from within but adora thinks she can escape shadow weaver’s abuse and the horde’s evil by literally escaping the horde. u can see where both of them are coming from and that’s why it’s so sad :( it’s so fucking sad y’all :( they do their whole. come with me vs stay with me thing,,, and it doesn’t work out. duh it’s like ep 2 why would it work out. catra finds out that adora can use her lesbian sword to turn into a taller lesbian and instead of giving into her gayness and marrying adora right away her internalized homophobia makes her run away :( she thought adora doesn’t care about her anymore because she has new friends and can turn into a giant sword lady :( and it’s all very sad :( 8.5/10
razz: adora’s having trouble turning into she-ra. no one asked, but based on this whole show, it’s because she just broke up with catra and that hit hard :( it’s pretty hard to turn into ur superhero alter ego when you’re yearning. back at the horde, catra is also yearning. she is bitter because everyone is raving about how lit she-ra is and catra is like yeah she-ra is sexy but can we have a discussion about how she-ra breaks your heart. how she-ra makes you cry. how she-ra abandons you for new friends and doesn’t want to be your gf anymore? have we considered that? and everyone is confused because why does catra seem like she knows she-ra so well. didn’t you just meet her catra? and even tho catra is a bitter ex who’s angry and wants revenge she’s still like. in love with adora and wants to protect her. so she acts cool and doesn’t tell anyone that adora is she-ra. even tho lonnie tells catra not to be so feral because “adora’s not here to protect you anymore” catra still wants to protect adora. okay. yes the thought of that does make me wanna cry. what about it. catra goes and lies on their shared adora’s bed. and she sees the teeny drawing of catra and adora on the bed frame. it reminds catra of the break up and she scratches adora’s picture. she regrets it like instantly and starts destroying the bed. and she cries. she like cries real tears what the FUCK. and then SHADOW WEAVER WALKS IN?? rude much?? can’t a girl get some privacy as she mourns a break up with a girl she’s been in love with her whole life but technically never dated for real? 9/10
flowers for she-ra: adora realizes that it’s a pretty bad idea to break up with your girlfriend when you spent your whole life sleeping in the same room/same bed as her and she comes to the Very Shocking realization that she gasp! cannot sleep without catra! wow who would have thought! so she immediately goes on a search for a sleeping partner rebound... who is glimmer (sorry glimmer it’s her first time not having her gf) and she even sleeps at glimmer’s feet the way we saw catra sleep at adora’s feet. really makes you wonder if catra and adora take turns doing that? sleeping at each other’s feet because their internalized homophobia (thanks a lot shadow bitch) prevented them from going a step further and sleeping in each other’s arms... oh well. meanwhile, catra is gloating about being force captain, but she’s also Still protecting adora’s identity as she-ra. and apparently, drawing pictures of she-ra? that she hid from shadow weaver? is that what happened? i can’t tell if she drew that picture or not but the way it looks from the scene she Definitely drew that picture! hello????? anyway, catra’s still crying to anyone that has ears about how her gf dumped her, when really it was kind of a mutual break up that was entirely shadow weaver’s fault even tho she wasn’t there. sigh. i’m bringing this up to a 7/10 because of “it’s just a phase! she’s confused, i’ll bring her back, i swear :(“
the sea gate: “i’ve got something more important to do” and here we see the start of catra literally abandoning all other duties because she would rather go flirt with her enemy gf... she literally hopped onto she-ra’s sword.... she insult her gf....... she brag to her gf about achievement.... but she also want her gf back :( adora refuses to go back to the land of oppression tho so they get into a. really suggestive fight. and catra always makes adora leaving the horde out to be adora leaving her.... she’s like babe i am literally so sexy. why would you dump me :( i’m hot :( and she’s right but i hate them. can y’all just like. not be so gay? :/ it’s starting to make me a lil bit homophobic tbh! and catra whispers into adora’s ear but it’s kind of like an insult so she gets water slapped and is forced to stop flirting :( boooo 8.5/10
system failure: hm. catra wasn’t in this ep? damn :( it’s a great ep but it’s pretty hard to find any catradora if adora is delirious the whole time and catra isn’t there. but! drunk/high adora existing gives us an idea of what she would be like around catra. 1/10 for the potential
in the shadows of mystacor: catra’s face when she sees adora in shadow weaver’s spy cam thing... interesting. she also acts like she’s So Sick of the adora missions which is true but also she is lying. kind of annoying that shadow weaver would be like. homophobic. but when she’s messing with adora’s head in mystacor she uses catra’s voice and laugh to achieve maximum effect :/ which like. thanks? but catra wasn’t actually there so shadow weaver really full on gaybaited adora huh :/ adora eventually defeats shadow weaver and we finally see catra again uwu she ends up plotting to kidnap bow and glimmer but the line “if you want to take down adora, you have to go for the heart” is so interesting because we eventually find out just how much of adora’s heart is filled with catra... 4/10 on its own 6/10 if you let the heart comment ruin your life!
princess prom: ARE Y’ALL READY TO PARTY oh my god,,, this is it you guys. this is THE ep. so funny of adora to be like. i have so many plans for every single thing that might happen. i am GOING to spend the party getting princess frosta to join the rebellion. and then catra shows up and adora is like nvm. what if i followed catra wherever she went instead. which is very interesting! adora, sweet baby, why do you always assign yourself to fight/follow/chase catra? when according to her in future eps is actually a bad decision which we can infer from her saying stuff like catra knows my every move she will be able to take me down,, ok then stop hogging her all the time?? anyway. let’s get into things chronologically. “how dare those princesses pretend they’re better than you? just because you’re different? how dare they abandon people just because they don’t fit in with their perfect little lives? how DARE they take best friends and turn them into giant sword ladies who run off with people clearly inferior to you?!” catra.... u got sth to say there buddy? :/ u got something u wanna get off your chest? :/ u had us in the beginning but then you started to get really specific :/ what’s that about sweetie :/ catra’s coping mechanism for this is to put on a really hot suit and going to princess prom to seduce the shit outta adora? fucking genius. yes she also kidnapped two people but let’s focus on the ingenuity of catra’s plan to make adora hot and heavy and also somehow jealous the entire time. incredible. so, catra shows up at the prom with scorpia and adora immediately starts bickering with her about rules. she fails to get catra kicked out so she resolves to stalk her instead! and catra... oh catra... she puts on a whole show..... performing everything from popping a tiny cake into her mouth to circling around a pillar seductively and dropping a note into a bin that says hi adora >:3 with a drawing of catra’s face that she worked hard on!! and adora looks like a crazy stalker ex gf and everyone is like damn.... u ok? :/ but adora doesn’t have time to care too much aside from a little “haha i swear i’m not a weirdo!” look because her mind is just screaming CATRA CATRA CATRA and she finds catra creeping up to entrapta. but ofc catra’s not trying to push entrapta off the ledge! no! she’s using entrapta to make adora jealous :3 catra pulls entrapta close and says “she stole my food and then asked me to spy on people with her. is this what love feels like?” and it WORKS and adora has to pull entrapta aside and be all hey i know we’re not super close yet but the bro code kinda states that u don’t date ur friend’s ex :/ so could you please back off? and entrapta is like say what now? ur gf just ditched btw so adora goes running after catra again and surprise surprise! it’s time to dance! and there are romantic lights and music! and uh oh! everyone else has a partner except for catra! guess this means adora’s gotta dance with her ohhhhh noooooooo :/ “i don’t know about you.... but i am having a blast” i really don’t think catra was lying!! i am on the verge of passing out!! adora moving away from catra after saying “whatever it is you’re planning, it won’t work!” and catra, many dance partners later, slamming back into adora’s body to continue their conversation with “maybe my plan won’t work, but then again...” THE DIP!!!!!!! “maybe it already has...” oh my god you guys. what the fuck. like they get into an angry shove fight after this but the tension! the tension! and then adora LIFTS catra up in the air? real close? they get ice blocked by frosta after this, more specifically she traps adora because she shoved catra first djfjdjdjdjd,,, after telling glimmer to find bow catra grazes adora’s chin with her tail to remind her that she’s still here!! don’t neglect!! and catra says the iconic “it was fun distracting you though ;)” line that adora was clearly affected by because she memorizes it and says it back to catra..... years later. i CANNOT make any of this shit up. what the fuck y’all. the fact that these evaluations are so long bother me but i HAVE to call these hoes out!! moving on, adora runs after catra in a very dramatic chase/fight scene, and adora is very amped up on uh, hormones. she catches catra at a “dead end” and goes “hah! trapped >:)” which is such a stupid thing to say to ur cat gf who can jump very high, so catra says “you wish ;)” and it is just. everything they are saying sounds very suggestive okay why are they LIKE THIS anyway catra jumps up some floating ice and adora follows her up the floating ice because she’s gay and she will jump however much is required of her to chase her gf down ok!! and so adora and catra are now on some ice cliff where adora keeps lunging and they’re also kind of like dancing? and catra is being very ~smooth~ dodging all of adora’s strikes and hitting her in one move. that’s kind of cool but also don’t bully your gf :( come on catra :( not cool :( but adora doesn’t give up and they continue fighting, until one missed move from catra nearly sends her off the cliff. but adora thinks she’s hot and she’s in love with her so she’s like nooo catra don’t fall off this cliff ur so sexy aha and catches her by. the waist. not the hand! but by the waist. any normal person would’ve gone for the hand. factually speaking, catra’s hand is easier to reach than her waist. but adora’s a hoe. so, she grabs catra by the waist and pulls her in closer by grabbing! oh you guessed it! her chest! like she grabs her shirt but it’s the part of the shirt that was at the chest. what the fuck. they both get this look in their eye that makes it seem like they want to kiss each other???? hello????????? and like. very upsettingly we now know that they’ve always wanted to kiss each other so. that knowledge makes watching this scene even worse. they shouldn’t have become enemies if they were going to be this horny. they’re so distracted by each other’s lips that they forget they’re standing at the edge of a cliff and guess what! they fall off the cliff! what a twist! but adora is like i’m NOT going to die because i was distracted by catra’s lips, so she grabs her hair stick thing and stabs it into the ice cliff. she grabs catra by the hand to save her, not the waist this time, because holding catra’s hand is also gay so she might as well do it. too bad catra lets go of her hand and ditches her tho :( i would minus points for that except it wouldn’t make much of a difference. catra says “see you later, princess ;)” because she’s already expecting to see adora again.... good lord 4828473737373/10 thanks noelle! i died
no princess left behind: but i’m a buddhist so i’m back. we open with catra laughing so prettily looking at her gf’s lesbian sword. very cute. later on, when shadow weaver betrays catra and tells her to go pack her things because she’s not needed anymore... adora gives her this look? :( she looks like she feels bad because catra’s clearly still suffering under shadow weaver’s thumb. but let’s zero in on the most important part! catra dragging the sword and pointing it at adora, before turning it around and giving it to her. “this is NOT because i like you” ok catra i didn’t think that before but now i Absolutely believe that you did this because you like adora. and u can tell adora kind of is like. ready to start her whole “you can come with me! we can be together! :(“ thing but things are complicated and catra told her to Just Go so... it is a lot and we know things are deeper than just catra liking adora but we will get emo over that later. 9/10 that was a good fucking scene
the beacon: “she left me behind too, like i was nothing :(“ some people say this is catra manipulating entrapta, and they are correct, but also she’s like.. “oh adora left you too? mad kin :(“ she was deadass about to start a support group with entrapta and technically she kind of did! good for them <3 catra goes to look for first ones tech and adora goes to look for the beacon to learn how to heal and guess what happens! they’re looking for the same place! catra’s “on second thought... hey adora >;)” at the end pushes this up to an 8/10, but that’s just like the last five seconds of the ep so objectively the rest of the ep was like. 4/10 idk lmaoooo
promise: finally some good fucking food. catra follows adora into the beacon and has a little fun spying on her and enjoying her epic fails at getting information on she-ra. she also finds the first one tech she needs, because she’s a multitasker and she can spy on her gf while doing important missions <3 but also she gets caught and adora nearly kills her fksjdjd “hey watch it! >:(“ is so funny because catra??? u are trespassing???? but also uwu baby yeah don’t accidentally kill ur gf adora :( adora’s reaction is also very funny “catra? what are you doing here? :O” as if catra hasn’t shown up at 70% of the places adora has been, but the way she asks it’s like. adora is happy to see catra? pleasantly surprised? man she is whipped. anyway, adora tries to pull the Tough Girlfriend move and like, mildly scold catra for trespassing into a building where only one person (she-ra) is allowed to be in. but she still grabs catra’s hand and guides her to an escape path :’) she lifts up a giant door thing and waits until catra runs in to let go and run after her <3 chivalry isn’t dead after all <3 they get into a lover’s tiff as they run for their lives and essentially it’s like “babe wtf WHY are giant mutant spiders trying to kill us isn’t this ur house” “they’re trying to kill YOU this is why you ring the doorbell instead of running in secretly after i open the door!” “oh and how was i supposed to know that! why can’t you just tell your teenage mutant ninja spiders to chill out??” “they’re not house-trained babe :( i moved in two minutes ago they came with the apartment” anyway the angry spider monsters catch up to them so catra goes “adora? :(“ and that’s enough for adora to take Direct Action so she slashes the walls and ceiling of the room they’re in before grabbing catra to shield them both. she is NOT getting her deposit back but uwu anything to keep gf safe <3 adora transforms back to her usual body and she once again reminds catra that she’s Not Supposed To Be Here and she’s like “god now i have to like Protect You and it’s gonna put my life in danger :/ haha what are you gonna do for me in return tho ;)” and catra is like. “well good thing i didn’t ASK you to protect me” so adora is like :( —> >:( wait u know what??? ok u know what????? why are u here >:( how’d u find me?? >:( and do u mean any of this in a gay way?? >:( say it’s in a gay way right now >:( and catra is like. ur gay castle sent a gay beam of light into the sky. i saw it immediately bc im gay but i do NOT mean this in a gay way. and adora is like oh :( ok :’( and then asks about shadow weaver bc she saw what went down in the horde and she like. i think she can tell shadow weaver still exerts some form of control that catra hasn’t broken free from? :( and then catra is like haha shadow weaver is a LOSER and adora starts giving her Gay Looks and it makes catra scared because her gf now thinks she has a crush on her!!!!!!! how Embarrassing!! “ugh, i knew you’d be weird about me letting you escape” ok so why did you say that thing about not liking her? “i told you it’s not because i like you!” there it is! that’s EXACTLY what i thought you’d say you lesbian! and the way she says it??? she definitely likes adora???? she is so bad at lying?????? and adora is so smug about it like her Face plus her crossed arms and the whole “i mean, i didn’t ;) i didn’t say anything ;)” her eyes.... your honor she’s gay...... she’s like what if we were in my secret castle..... standing amongst the rubble because i destroyed the infrastructure to protect you..... and we were both girls....... adora was Ready to turn her sword into a Bed right then and there ok!!! it’s not me it’s Her Eyes,,, anyway catra starts being salty again and brings up bow and glimmer and is like hey where’s those idiots u dumped me for :/ thought you looooooved hanging out with them and doing everything with them :/ like we used to :/ are they not as fun to hang out with adora is that why you’re standing in this spider infested building with me instead :/ and adora suddenly remembers that she can’t just be horny and that she has to hold catra accountable for her actions so she’s like oh my friends? the ones who u kidnapped and held for ransom???? >:( and catra is like ya what other friends would i be talking about :/ like god i know she’s evil but she’s so funny take her back adora :( jk ik ur gonna start begging her to Come With You in like minutes u absolute simp. but before that happened catra was like fuck u lets Split Up >:( we already broke up why would we run away from spiders together huh? unless u still like me? but clearly there’s only one way for them to walk so they can’t split up just yet and adora gives catra this >:( look so catra is like FINE one last date and they walk away together. they go into this... dark room and catra wants to leave the dark room because she’s scared of ghosts :( jk but the door disappears and something scans catra and adora and light hope is like cool! time to show them memories that are specifically picked to make catra resent adora! which :( not cool light hope :( i get that ur a bot who’s programmed to serve the homophobic agenda but damn u were gay once too :( anyway they’re sent to a memory in the fright zone and adora gets Angry bc she thinks catra tricked her and catra is like i wouldn’t play u like that :( and she finds out it’s all fake so she’s like adora :D u don’t have to be scared or mad at me anymore! :D she goes to look for adora but adora’s watching a memory of them when they were six and being really cute. back when adora had the moral backbone of a chocolate eclair and only really cared about making catra happy and having her back. catra blinded octavia and insulted her and adora was still like: ur not bleeding ur bones aren’t broken and u picked a pointless fight with someone who did not provoke you in any way. where is she i will insult her some more. i love u. like damn adora really do be a ride or die girl huh!! she’s still like this but they both have too many issues to realize it :( anyway catra and adora slip into the catra and adora of their memories and begin running off together holding hands............ and then they Realize they’re running off together Holding Hands....... and catra pulls away because of her internalized homophobia :( devastating. they get into a tiny little fight over magic and kidnapping again and then adora’s face softens and she’s like catra :( why Did you let me escape :( i know i made fun of u for it before but i legit do not know if u meant it in a gay way. pls confirm? :( u could have gotten caught catra :( why did u risk it :( is it because you secretly want to run away with me and join the rebellion? :( and be my gf? :( she’s so caught up in her questions that she nearly falls off a cliff AGAIN and catra catches her by the hand because these girls are obsessed with almost falling off cliffs to their deaths and saving each other. don’t judge them their Intricate Rituals are THAT deep. and catra is like. did you really think. i would let shadow weaver erase your memory like that? and risk you forgetting our relationship? even towards the end when we were broken up and fighting each other it was kinda lit and i want u to remember it. and adora is an idiot so she’s like idk lmao probably aren’t u like evil now and catra is like well you have a point but also fuck u for thinking i don’t care about u,,, u never did have too much faith in me :( and adora is like can u blame me :( and catra is like ur hot so.... no. i will let my tail linger on your hand as a hint that i still love you. and then catra is like.... adora i know u said fuck horde rights but does that include our relationship :( u had good memories right :( of me? :( and adora is like um duh??? i miss you so goddamn much too oh my god and catra is like hey how dare you imply that i missed you even tho it’s true!!! get over urself! and adora is like not until you admit you like me ;) and they play fight again because the rituals are so intricate..... and catra lies and says she doesn’t like adora ok lmao... they enter the next memory and it’s catra and adora sparring and they’re competitive but it’s also flirty? catra pretends to be hurt to get adora to let her guard down but lonnie interferes and this causes adora to beat catra. which. yeah :( and after adora wins she does the good gf thing where she asks catra if she’s okay and catra’s not ok but she lies and hides away to cry :( and we get it babe we do!! it’s hard being in love with someone who you’re also resentful of because you’re raised in a competitive environment and always treated like you’re worthless in comparison :( but the simulation stops and catra is caught by one of the spiders and adora doesn’t manage to save her in time, grabbing her hand only to fail and have catra slip through her fingers :( they scream for each other but catra manages to get the upper hand on the spider monster, except adora charges in at the last second and delivers the final blow, further driving home the false point that light hope is trying to make :( adora just wants to protect catra but because of their upbringing catra sees it as adora always wanting to be the best and adora thinking she’s better than catra hence her telling catra what to do “all the time” which isn’t totally true but it’s what catra has been led to believe :( and also adora’s upbringing plays into it too because she thinks she has to save everyone and take responsibility for everything and it’s all just really sad bros :( what the fuck :( adora apologizes for leaving again and tries to convince catra she never meant to leave her and that she wants catra to come with her because she knows catra isn’t a bad person :( and you can see!! catra considering it!! but then precisely BECAUSE catra is considering it the memory simulation thing kicks in again and... hoo boy. we see catra and adora sneak into the black garnet chamber, after being cute and competitive and running around the horde swinging from wire to wire.... they get caught by shadow weaver and she specifically punishes only catra. and it’s so fucked because it puts adora in this position of guilt where she always feels like she has to protect adora whilst slowly brainwashing her over the years into believing that catra does do disobedient things and that adora can only escape that if she’s always perfect and taking charge of everything. and for catra.... it takes the mutually loving relationship they have and poisons it because shadow weaver makes it very clear that to her, catra’s only redeeming quality is that adora favors her? and if not for that she would be disposed of? and so it’s very hard for catra to find individuality and a healthy connection to adora which created unresolved resentment and issues and just... :( and the whole confrontation they have after the simulation ends... adora could never protect catra in the way she needed to be protected because adora was also a child, and receiving a different form of abuse, and it’s just. harder for catra to leave? especially because she didn’t receive a sudden destiny the way adora did and her issues with the horde were never limited to morality. and so catra is just. she has way too much to work through and she can’t see past her resentment for adora because the machine is making her remember all of it. and so she tells a half truth and half lie to adora about giving her the sword because she didn’t want adora to come back :( catra runs away from adora and is attacked by flashes of memory. and then she faces one last memory alone. and it’s the promise adora made to catra when they were kids, about always looking out for each other, and catra looks at kid!catra and thinks adora has broken that promise, still stinging from the hurt of adora leaving her behind after finding the sword and becoming she-ra. it was never meant to be like this but catra is hurting so she focuses only on her side of things and how she saw these events play out and she :( decides to kind of betray adora? it hurts So Much because adora looks so hopeful when she sees catra while hanging on for dear life, and she thinks catra will save her again but catra talks about how the sword won’t work for her because she’s never been the Special One like adora was always heralded to be in the horde. and having adora literally be she-ra just drives that point home for catra and she hates adora for it because this means all the other stuff she believes is true too. adora made her feel weak on purpose, adora made catra think she needed her on purpose. “every hero needs a sidekick, right?” and adora’s “catra, no, that’s not how it was!” hits even harder now because we know that adora just. loved catra. she was in love with her but adora was also like catra in that she’s a product of her circumstances and upbringing. she was the way she is as a means of survival. but the one thing there that was pure and true was that they loved each other.... upsettingly neither of them can see that. catra goes down even further into the path of evil and thinks that. being free of adora. is the thing that will liberate her and bring her happiness. which. she is wrong about. but she can’t exactly see all that clearly right now :( and adora begging catra not to “do this” which... means she’s begging her not to leave? “bye adora! i really am going to miss you” and adora’s desperation skyrockets but it’s too late :( catra doesn’t come back for her and adora cries.... and it’s just so insane that literally everyone who wants to control adora focuses on poisoning her bond with catra because that’s the relationship that... matters most to her in the world. when you’ve loved someone your whole life it hurts when they betray you and it hurts to betray them too, as we can see from catra when she arrives back at the horde. she essentially looks Wrecked and freezes up when scorpia calls her “the best friend ever!” but i want to make one quick note of her “personal space” talk with scorpia? like fjdjdjdjd you have never had personal space with adora not once in your life ok that’s reserved for the gf only i see. 10/10 i am so wrecked emotionally this is way too much but also because it makes me so emo i will give it a perfect score but nothing else. no bonus points because i do not want to reward putting me in pain!
light hope: light hope showing adora the memories that make her feel guilty and it’s the first scene where catra sees her as she-ra and walks away.... adora’s been feeling guilty over catra since the moment she failed at getting catra to leave the horde :( 3/10
the battle of bright moon: “catra will be leading the horde when they attack. i have to face her.” it’s so interesting how there’s so many pressing things at hand? the weather is screwy, the alliance is broken, no one’s coming to save them, the rebellion could be crushed, but the thing that is really bothering adora, the thing that she brings up first, is catra. “i saw catra in there. i thought i could get through to her, but all i did was push her farther to the side of evil” she sounds... so heartbroken about it all :( catra and adora meet on the battlefield and the first thing catra says is,,, u guessed it,,,, “hey adora.” and adora’s like “catra. surprised to see me?” and like damn they’re really so good at being enemies. the talent. the tension. impeccable. and then catra says nah i didn’t think u died and im glad u made it out alive. and adora, bless her soul, is like oh.... u mean in a gay way..... u didn’t want me to die..... for homosexual reasons?? and catra is like no! haha! i uh, i just wanted to kill u in a cooler much sexier way. and adora is like oh :( oh >:( oh >:’( and they get into a very heated sexy fight like catra wanted. and they taunt each other like. “i thOUgHt yOU weRe suPposED tO bE stRoNG” “aND i tHouGHt yOu wERe sUpPOsEd tO bE fAst” you know. very cool well crafted taunts. and like. they fight a lot which is kind of sad but also kind of sexy because their styles are like? similar and different? which is the dumbest way to compare any two things ever but like :( y’all get what i mean right :( we get one more Hanging Off A Cliff scene and this time adora grabs catra by the chest and shoves her against the wall, and catra is like cool! but u did this,, for what? and then adora realizes catra was just distracting her Again and bright moon is very badly under attack :( catra bids her adieu so adora can run back and fight. but she like. gets caught :( and catra walks up to her and gently caresses her cheek before adora passes out and it’s evil but it’s also tender? but it’s also evil i know i know :( all of the princesses come to help adora so she sends a beam of magic gay light and heals everything and then all the princesses send a gay tsunami washing over catra. the horde loses, and catra retreats in a skiff, but adora and catra exchange one more Look as she leaves... hm. 9/10
#text#she ra#catradora#spop#this post... is so stupidly long#its essentially like a recap shitpost#but i give it a score out of 10#i considered redoing the whole post but :(#it is what it is:(#hope y'all like this#please at least find this mildly entertaining#i hope to god the read more thing doesn't break#because...... this is long apologies in advance#hope its not too hard to read
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I read call down the hawk, here’s my aching heart:
*spoilers*
(I wasn’t planning on making a long post about this book but I couldn’t help myself, I had too much to say and I needed a place to scream about pynch)
“This is going to be a story about the Lynch brothers” I knew that already so why am I crying, already, the first line and I’m crying
It mentioned Ronan living somewhere other than the barns after Niall died and I’m just here like,, you can say Monmouth it’s ok
“Adam Parrish was the destination of this road trip” and “Ronan missed him like a lung” my heart my heart my heart
“the guy he loved” PLEASE
Ronan Lynch upon seeing Adam Parrish for the first time: *literally prays*
I see the obsession with Adam’s hands goes way back
“Funny how quickly a handful of weeks could render something unrecognizable” I know ronan was talking about the weather/the campus but my stomach dropped pls this better not be pynch foreshadowing
Their reunion was so chaotic I’d expect nothing else tbh
The watch keeps track of Ronan’s time zone I can’t-
“He was with Adam, and Adam still loved him” PLS THE USE OF THE L WORD KILLS ME EVERY TIME
“there was burnished Gansey, who might not have saved Ronan’s life in high school, but at the very least kept it mostly out of Ronan’s reach so that he could not take it down and break it” this line bothers me bc gansey literally did save Ronan’s life that was the whole godamn point 🙃
Objectively I understand that the crying club are probly decent ppl but subjectively they ain’t no gangsey that’s for sure
“he longed for him even while holding him” pls the yearning,, it’s too much for my frail heart
Bryde needs to gtfo of Ronan’s head is what need to happen
Who is lindenmere I only know Cabeswater
Ronan is crying I’m crying we’re all crying
It breaks my heart that Ronan is still yearning for something more while the rest of the gangsey are out there living
Gansey is chained to a tree in Oregon, seems legit
Chainsaw knows how to say “Atom” I’m fucking crying
“What, Declan? I’m trying to fucking tow a cow” I love this book
Matthew be like “I’ve been staring at the edge of the water long as I can remember never really knowing why”
I literally had a headcanon that Ronan says I love u to Adam in Latin
“He sucked in more longing with every inhale, he exhaled some of his happiness on the other side” this godamn book I swear 😩
“dreamt of you” AGSHSJAK
Oof I kinda love Parsifal all he wants to do is eat some bienenstich made by his momma
Wait wait wait these Niall and aurora doppelgängers are confusing me
“I saved your life because I love you” HE SAID IT OUT LOUD ! HE SAID IT ! IT HAS BEEN SAID
I know it’s common knowledge at this point that they are in an established loving relationship but it hits me the same every time I’m reminded
“It was possible no two students at aglionby had ever come away with such a thorough understanding of Latin (or, possibly, of each other)” I have no words
Declan Lynch falling in love with a dream? More likely than you’d think
Man I hope at the end of all this Declan gets to punch a judge and go somewhere to live and breathe art for the rest of his life
This whole dreamers are born to die young theme is stressing me out
“Ronan, I know you” literally everything they say to each other knocks the air out of my lungs
“They hugged again, merrily, waltzing messily in the kitchen, and kissed, merrily, waltzing more” brb if you need me I’ll be reading this line over and over again for the rest of eternity
Two things: 1) gansey left his mint plant for Ronan to take care of 2) ronan dreamed a literal sun to keep the plant alive when he could have just as easily put it by a window like a normal person that’s the cutest bro shit I’ve ever seen
“Adam stopped breathing” please stiefvater imagine how tired we are
Also where tf is opal I miss the lil weirdo
“he missed him acutely even as he was looking at him” it’s too much,, it’s all too much
Oh hell ya Ronan and Jordan/Hennessy/all the other girls finally met I been waiting for this one
Waaait is the dark lady seashore niall’s dream space like Cabeswater/lindenmere is Ronan’s ??
Oh Matthew, my sweet boy, he figured out he’s a dream
Jordan. Is. Painting. Declan. I. Can’t. Breathe.
Oh damn ok so the lace is trynna get out and destroy the world ? Is that it ?
Matthew asking “Do I have a soul?” broke me
Matthew said “I’m the fake brother” and Declan uno reversed that shit so fast
Alright lindenmere I see you I see you but the thing is.. I miss my girl Cabeswater
OPAL FINALLY
“He didn’t have it in him to love another dream. It hurt too bad. Loving anything did” ouch :(
Fuck fuck fuck this is the part where chaos erupts
Damn those sundogs are cool af tho
I swear I didn’t breathe until I knew Matthew and Declan were alive holy shit
Declan thinking “The world was broken” and “I never actually lived” </3
Let Ronan and Declan hug each other challenge
Adam Parrish please pick up the goddamn phone I am begging you
The way Hennessy is so in awe that Ronan has complete trust of lindenmere/his subconscious made me ache bc it took a helluva lot for him to get to this point
“Hennessy?” “Lynch.” “I’ve been alone a long time” excuse me I’m gonna need a minute-
The way Ronan describes what the lace is to him,, I’m fucking sobbing
Hennessy and Ronan’s swords are badass
I still don’t trust bryde but he got them out of there so points to him I guess :/
Where’s book 2 I need book 2
#call down the hawk#cdth#ronan lynch#declan lynch#matthew lynch#jordan hennessy#gansey#adam parrish#pynch#the dreamer trilogy#trc#maggie stiefvater
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hi i'm a big fan of ur work :> (im on anon cuz shy)
anyways i noticed that u read a lot, so do you have any book recommendations? i'm trying to expand my reads and all i've read so far are YA/fantasy novels
omg hellooooo<3
actually, i don't read a lot HUHU i would like to read more but i don't have the budget to buy more books </3 (i'm physically incapable of focusing on my phone so i need the actual thing HUHU) but anyway, i hope my limited selection can satisfy ur needs in some way :'>
okay starting off with a book i'm currently reading and doing a terrible job on it because i don't have a physical copy HAGDBSJ— a little life by hanya yanagihara!
genre according to fanfic criteria: slice of life, domestic fiction, found family trope, ANGST fucking aaghdjdkska PAIN.
two things you need to know abt this book is that it's (1) long, and (2) SAD. very sad. i was already crying before the angsty parts came in because u just get so ATTACHED to the characters ugh i'm in love with willem.
another thing u need to know is that this book deals with a lot of triggering and sensitive topics. so if ur planning on reading it, please read through this list of trigger warnings before you do.
OKAY the next two will be from the legend himself, haruki murakami:
norwegian wood— bro i cried. that's not a surprise because i cry all the time but THE WRITING?? IS SO GOOD??? god i take so much inspiration from murakami's words bcs it's so???? bro u just gotta read it to find out it's SO—
genres: romance, coming of age, there's lots of sex and sex talk and it's just v explicit be warned HAGSHJA
also just a note abt murakami's writing is that he uh..... writes women.... evidently through the male gaze (ahem boobs) so take that as u will 😐.
scrumptious writing tho ooh lala
next one is after dark— this book is SO VIBEY like i don't fucking know what the hell happened here but i enjoyed it nonetheless. so much music recs too HAHHAHA this was such a nice read.
okay no way in hell am i gonna make a rec list and NOT mention my queen jane austen so let me just recommend all six od her novels because they're MWAH. ranked from my most favorite to least<3:
persuasion— GOD HOW DO I EVEN CONDENSE THIS okay. so much yearning. SO MUCH!!! YEARNING!!! it's always been you trope??? a love that endures??? CAPTAIN WENTWORTH'S LETTER AT THE END GOOD GOD RUIN MY LIFE!! NOW!!!
emma— read for a hecking good time<3 so much misunderstandings HAHA fuck this was so entertaining equal parts laugh. equal parts HOLLERING. very sexy book.
okay the next three are relatively the same rank
northanger abbey—if there was a modern rendition (maybe working on smthng like this rn) it would be a girlie being way too obsessed with wattpad books and trying so hard to believe that she is starring in one herself. also the male lead is to DIE FOR he's so fucking sWOON WORTHY I FELL IN LOVE WITH HIM NO JOKE I FELL IN LOVE.
pride & prejudice— don't think i have to say a lot abt this LMAO. except for the fact that you'll more vividly see the spiraling of mr. darcy into his state of whipped-ness with lizzie.
mansfield park— currently rereading.....god this was so good but for some reason i'm having a lot of trouble trying say anything about it HAHAHAH.
sense & sensibility— least favorite out of the six but still good 👍 (i am actually marriane dashwood, save for the fact that i'd up marrying someone almost the same age as my dad).
LAST ONE is the song of achilles by madelline miller! pretty sure you've heard about this already HAGDBSJ
i cried so fucking much like straight up SOBBING my tears wouldn't stop aahahah. the writing too??? GOD TIER. THE HEAVEN'S CRIED TOO. fuck.
this book ruined me thnx.
just for a little addition, i'm linking my have read/tbr list here too, just in case HAHAH hope this helped, and happy reading bb<3
#💌: anon#edit: i forgot to add all of the pjo and hoo novels in the list bcs i read those in ninth grade huhu.
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