#not even letting someone try to learn how to be better isnt fixing anything

[technicolorxsn]

wow okay

[mejomonster]

Modu chapter 5: fei du blew him a kiss

两位大爷谁也得罪不起，陶警官只好冲着无辜的夜空翻了个白眼，快步跟上骆闻舟。

走了几步，他下意识地一回头，果不其然，看见费渡正一动不动地站在原地目送他的背影，见他回头，费渡好像早料到这一幕一样，倏地一笑，伸出两根手指，在自己嘴唇上贴了一下，然后冲陶然轻轻一弹。

陶然：“……”

So the thing is. I read edanglartranslation's english translation of modu before. And I remember that while early in the story tao ran seems more like he cares for fei du... the more you learn, the more you realize Tao Ran is a realist and Luo Wenzhou's actually the one who is more open to believing Fei Du can't be capable of truly monstrous things... even when evidence implies otherwise. Luo Wenzhou acts like he assumes the worst, but hes trying very hard to push fei du onto a good path and be a good person. Knowing (some) of where fei du came from and some of the reality of his still cruel at times behavior. Whereas Tao Ran sees the fruits of fei du being influenced by luo wenzhou in a good way, and has hope for the kid, but when fei du does or seems to be involved in dark stuff well Tao Ran is less unfailingly in his court. The little girl who kills in case 2 is, as always, my favorite fei du parallel. Shes done similar to what he has done, and tao ran cant imagine saving her after all shes done or how she could even be this cruel. Luo wenzhou saw a fei du much like that little girl, and tried to help him grow into someone better than his surroundings (his dad etc). Luo wenzhou found a victim he failed to save, failed to help in time (and failed even as an older kid regarding fei du's own self harm versus what luo wenzhou didnt know), and still tried to help. And in just trying to helo, he did help fei du heal to some degrees and ultimately make some good choices and have a much better idea of his own internal morals and confidence in them.

Its always interesting to me the roles tao ran and luo wenzhou played in fei du's life abd as the story shifts what it lets you know. And as like an age gap relationship story, it actually uses that aspect to explore some really interesting perspective stuff about responsibility and blame and delusion and naivety. From luo wenzhou seeing fei du as His Responsibility to care for/help/save/fix as more than you'd ever see an adults choices (until of coursdl luo wenzhou learns to see him as an adult who now is responsible for himself), to fei du assuming unrealistically high blame and self hatred for things he isnt the cause of (because children tend to blame themselves more for tragedies in their lives and things they had no control over). Those two aspects make them very much savior/victim and hero/monster in each others eyes when they arent thinking clearly. To fei du, at his most irrational, hes a monster and its all he can be and luo wenzhou is a hero. At his most emotional, luo wenzhou sees himself as a failed savior and fei du as a victim he desperately wants to prove he can save.

They can both think clearly, but meeting when fei du was so young meant fei du took personal hatred of himself for his own trauma (and put luo wenzhou on a pedestal that luo wenzhou FELL off of by failing to help), and it meant luo wenzhou naive young detective faced the reality he cant save innocents and cant protect even if he tries and he reacted in a very controlling parent/cop way to try and fix by controlling (an interesting parallel and reverse of how fei dus dad acts - luo wenzhou punishes in ways fei du finds soothing and non threatening, luo wenzhou pressures him to be Nice, luo wenzhou lets him throw fits and hit and be a brat and be Anything versus his actual father who was terrifying if fei du actsd out even a little. Luo wenzhou is the "safe" outlet where fei du actually gets something close to a healthy upbringing, and by extension tao ran - who helps with that healthy modeling of safe authority figures because luo wenzhou pushes him to help give fei du safety and support).

Their ages when they meet develops this very particular way of using each other to heal and lean on, and then the relationship cant really bloom as romantic until luo wenzhou faces the fact fei du is an adult responsible for his Own Choices now and that luo wenzhou Cant Protect. They cant be together until fei du stops seeing luo wenzhou as a replacement for his mom - a precious person who loves him, who he fears he'll hurt or kill because his dad made him believe people he loves will die like his mom and itll be Fei Dus fault (in his head). They both have SO much baggage with each other by the time they start to try a romantic relationship. Because theyve already had each other to serve various roles and supports (and to support their own deluded way of hating themselves) for years.

Tao Ran, the realist, has had the least lies built up in his own head and least relying on those two (versus luo wenzhou who sees tao ran as a proxy wife/partner/beloved trusted person which Luo Wenzhou tends to NEED to fully trust in someone, and fei du who uses tao ran as a safe outlet to csre about... since luo wenzhou is too beloved like his own mom, too parental like his own dad, too precious to risk being close to lest fei du harms what he values). Tao Ran has his own delusions, mostly that he hurts ppl by being in their life, that he has to take on risk alone, and a lot of self sacrificing biases that are typical of a lone detective mold. If luo wenzhou is a optimist who hopes good people exist, and fei du is a pessimist who believes everyone is a monster, then tao ran is a middle view of believing its up to him (on his shoulders) to try and keep the world FROM being all monsters. And his failures crush him (where luo wenzhou can bounce back better), his hopes are fragile. As a trio the 3 of them make for an incredibly interesting story exploration.

[coldresolve]

A huge part of the whump being torture apologia discussion comes from the fact that people exoticize torture. It's foreign. It's something you see in spy movies and read about in thrillers. It's a pain that most people can safely distance themselves from in order to experience emotional catharsis or simple enjoyment. The thing is, some people don't get to have that distance.

It's hard for me to describe the sheer grief that comes with it all. I know a man who was tortured in prison. People who faced abuse from family so severe that it amounted to torture. Someone whose torture was to watch their friends be deliberately hurt. I wish whump writers could learn to have compassion for these people as well, even if their lived experiences are not exceptionally common or openly spoken about.

If an author portrays domestic abuse in their writing, it's generally considered necessary and responsible for them to either write the abuse in a realistic way or to state outside their writing that their portrayal of this very real issue is unrealistic. This respects people's lived experiences with abuse and prevents creating a culture of normalizing and glorifying abusive behavior.

It's most definitely not too much to ask of whump writers to uphold those same standards when writing about torture.

you have no idea how nice it is to get someone well spoken and well thought out in my inbox every once in a while. uh im on like hr 30 of being awake and kinda struggling piecing my thoughts together right now, so forgive me if i dont make a lot of sense, but i wanna say sth

the tone of your ask for some reason really hit a nerve for me. like getting slapped in the face, kind of. i think its the fact you come across really compassionate and just. calm, thoughtful in this. kinda puts my approach into perspective lol

i think im just angry about this topic. like ive got a passion for wanting to get it right, but its driven by anger and frustration. having ppl nitpick the fuck out of everything i say instead of actually having the sorts of conversations that should be had about the topic. i know me being angry edgy tantrum controversial oh whats he gonna say now guy and all that, turns people away from listening to me but i dont know how else to approach it sometimes, i don't want to make excuses for people who i feel should know better. i dont have that kind of patience i guess, at least not right now

i think that anger is like a manifestation, symptom. im angry about the people this happens to, and how catastrophic it is. angry at the people who let it happen. the systems that are built around it. people don't see how systemic torture can be. im angry that the fucking war on terror media frenzy was so effective, because your average person still fucking believes in all the bullshit. or the idea of torture survivors being "broken" like its a personal failure, like its the result of their own shortcomings when they're some of the strongest people you can meet. just all these unfair ideas about it that are everywhere. and people still somehow find it necessary to keep spreading those ideas, even if they know theyre wrong. when it doesnt add anything of value, youre not saying anything about it, youre not actually adding something to the conversation by going along with the bullshit, youre literally just entertaining yourself

i dont know how to not be angry about it, i think. thats the growth goal for me i guess, cause i know this isnt the sorta thing thats gonna fix itself tomorrow. and i dunno your ask just made me think about that, like how i handle this on a personal level. and i think itd be healthy for me to step away from the discussion for a couple days at least and just. accept that i tried to reach people this round, maybe it didnt really work, thats fine, ill try again some other time. also i am writing all this very slowly cause my skull is kinda collapsing in on itself so to speak and maybe that has something to do with me being sorta hopelessly frustrated lmfao. apologies

[anandasamsara]

i guess im in a new low for my depression

im kind of afraid of going outside. its not really fear, but its uncomfortable to think about getting out of the house and i feel like i dont deserve to??

which tangles with the "there are relatively good things happening between the bad ones, but the good things happening arent the ones that should be happening, so i cant feel good about them"

like, i guess my parents are actually really divorcing this time, which is the bad thing, but ive been able to get a few conventions down for the next two months, which should be good, but what i actually need to happen is a real job that i can use to pay rent if/when my dad goes away, which is both bad and good, bc i dont actually want a job bc i dont feel like i can put up with any more stress, but i do want dad to leave bc its been impossible with him here, so i need the job...

my anxiety has also been manifesting as rashes and acne bc the feeling isnt enough anymore for my brain to let me know there are things wrong all around even tho theres not much i can do about it other than worry

i also dont feel human bc i dont want to deal with everything, i dont want a job, i dont want to feel, ive been sleeping for like almost 15 hours per day, havent washed my hair in two weeks and dont feel any motivation to keep going

im trying tho, but the only thing that makes me feel a little bit better is thinking about the big convention thats coming up in july, but i know i shouldnt be thinking about it bc i need a stable job and income to pay the bills, and then it stresses me out and i feel burnt out and not wanting to exist

and then i catch myself thinking on how much better my mom's life would have been if i wasnt born, and then i blame my parents for everything bc i sure as hell didnt ask to be here and have to deal with expectations in a world that will never be accomodating to any of my limitations that i only learned i had after becoming a legal adult bc i was the gifted child and never had to think about it before

and this limitations keep surprising me still bc now i cant keep up with my friends for most things, i cant lift much weight even tho my arms can take it, i cant go up anything steeper than a 20° angle without struggle, cant be on my feet for more than 4 hours a day, and if its cold or too hot it goes down to 2 hours max, if i get cramps on my left leg it can take up to 3 days to get better and who know wht can happen if i fall down stairs again. theres a hook holding the bone in place, and if i break it, no idea if it can be fixed

and im still called lazy, or irresponsible, or someone has the guts to send me a job offer of babysitter or tell me that if i have to leave the post grad to be a cashier in a supermarket, that's life for me

i did leave, i cant afford it and it was turning out to be an awful place with awful professors

i was counting with the conventions to keep the post grad and try to go back to therapy, but this is the second month with none and as i get desperate, i also get hit repeatedly with my own limits and my own self worth that says i only have my body in this life so i shouldnt sacrifice it, but then i know i wont have much choice soon, so again, why am i even here to start with? i did not sign up for this, i do not want to be here

[trans-earthworm]

I mean, needle fears are a completely different situation from disqualifying conditions. I am literally not allowed to give blood, nor are many of my friends and partners. It doesn't matter how much stress it is to book because they will not let us donate. Ever. That's not something I can do anything about, and it's frankly deeply frustrating. Every time this topic comes up I get lectured about how important it is and how there's a shortage and how I need to just get over whatever's stopping me, when what's stopping me and people like me is the fucking blood services' requirements.

fascinating that the opinion "if you can give blood, you should" is consistently met with different explanations about why you cant donate blood. okay. i believe you. im not going to ask you prove that to me in tumblr.lawcourt. you cant donate blood. some people cant donate blood for neutral reasons and for bad reasons. thats a different conversation. because, if you'll read the original opinion again you may notice that, this opinion comes with the qualifier "if you can give blood". you cant give blood. this isnt about you. if you believe that the reasons you cant give blood are wrong (many such cases), write your local blood center or appropriate representative. since you'd like to have an entirely different conversation than "if you can give blood, you should":

you are making the case that one should not advocate for people (who are able) to do a good thing because some people are not able to do that thing. if you actually give a shit about being wrongly excluded from giving blood, youre going to get a lot further working with the people who harp on about donating than getting pissy because believe it or not, the people who harp on about donating want more people to donate. we want it to be more accessible. we would also like for you not to be excluded for bad reasons.

you can have whatever feelings you like but im going to keep advocating for people WHO ARE ABLE TO to donate blood and learn cpr and practice the fire route in their building at least once and keep a geographically relevant disater kit and other mundane shit that will hopefully never be too significant but could be the difference between living and dying for you and others in a crisis. and i cant even say i have all of that because im in my early 20s and im broke and just a little burnt out but i still try where i can. probably only a firefighter has that actual whole list down. but especially with blood, it does a lot a good with or without a crisis and its the easiest one 🚨(for people who are able to donate)🚨.

i hate that so many people are wrongly excluded but if my tumblr post is enough to get one person who is able to donate to make one appointment, thats a win because that pint does some good. if it gets someone who cant donate unjustly to do something to organize to fix that, even better because thats a step towards even more pints.

if you disagree with any of this block me but youre going to hear people advocating for blood donations for the rest of your life because blood donations are an essential part of modern science and medicine. if you cant donate, nothing they say applies.

tldr: if you can donate blood, you should. if you cant for whatever reason - legal, personal, geographical, medical, physical, psychological, fucking time managememt, right or wrong - that sentence does not apply to you. this isnt about you. stfu.

[ms-all-sunday]

Hi! Sorry if this is sudden or unwelcomed but i was wondering how would one go about ''fixing'' Sanji's character and your personal interpretation?

Now what i mean is that Sanji is an already great and complex character who has a lot of good moments and stuff, but the rampant misogyny really, really holds him back.

It just feels demeaning to an inmense degree, like that the only reason Kalifa - a member of the cp9 - won was because Sanji was holding back. Which feels like bullshit as she's a literal assassin and you could easily have rewritten it to make it so he lost due to her devil fruit instead. (or more emphasised).

I dont have a problem with an intrinsic vow but i just wish it wasn't this. I guess i just find it fustrating on how something so misogynistic is treated as a virtue. He could have had another vow instead like 'never kill' or 'don't fight someone when its clearly going to be a onesided beat down from you' or something to that effect. You know a vow that still causes problems when it comes up but doesn't devalue the agency or prowess of the other characters if that makes sense?

Idk, sorry if im being rambly. I finished reading the pre time skip stuff and its been bothering me whenever it comes up. I know it gets worse post-timeskip but i havent read that far yet so sorry if this seems premature in anyway. (I do know about Wano to a degree tho).

I haven't really seen any alternatives to sanji's behaviour - hell i seen someone argue it was necessary so he wouldn't be overpowered. And its kinda fustrating as a Sanji fan as it feels like in these moments his other qualities are kinda getting sidetracked in favour of his perviness. I dont mind he's pervy, but the way its utilised just feels kinda like a coppout more than anything and, well, misogynistic. (which im not saying remove all his misogyny, but tone it down and not make it seem virtuous if that makes sense?)

sorry for going on a rant. Its a topic ive been trying to look more into and i just want to hear more peoples opinions on.

so let me ask you a question anon, where do you think sanji first says something misogynistic? this isnt me trying to gotcha you or anything, i legitimately am curious.

i think how you "fix" sanji purely depends on how sexist you individually think he is. i think it ultimately comes down to, do you think when he treats women positively he's being sexist negatively? how much of that is a flaw to you, where do you draw the line? is your comfort level purely at where you can only stand sanji being negative towards men and treating women neutrally, or do you think you're comfortable with the opposite?

when i was a kid, i learned that characters are just a set of rules you make for yourself that when you add them to a situation and the application of those rules becomes a character. the character is both the solution and the equation, and i think the problem with sanji inherently lies not with his character at all, but how the narrative treats him for those actions, like you said.

i think it comes down to the fact while op does acknowledge and commentate on sexism a little, it doesnt have a strong enough commentary to support the characters like zoro, tashigi and sanji. who are amazing, wonderful characters, but are ultimately boggled down by the fact that oda doesn't do anything productive with them.

for example: both sanji and zoro (in their male feminist debate) are correct contextually, but op should be better at illustrating how zoro's "if theyre women they should be treated the same always" ideology can be wrong sometimes too, which would even out the commentary on them a lot more.

zoro and sanji should also progress as characters to ultimately seeing the contextual side of each others arguments and develop to the point where they know when its appropriate to apply each-others points

tashigi should've been sanjis rival, and helped the narrative illustrate how sanji's habit of treating women favourably can lean into sexism, which i feel like is the point of tashigi even being there but odas got the ingredients but is really bad at making a stew out of them.

i think ultimately the problem is that the narrative doesnt compensate for sanji, not that sanji doesnt compensate for the narrative. i think there's a conversation you can have internally with yourself on whether you want to write sanji as completely devoid of bigotry or whether you want to pick and choose and that's valid as well and i think would inherently apply to sanji even if op's commentary on sexism was well written, but. you're asking me how i'd "fix canon", and i think the fact that sanji doesn't get compensated for is indicative of a wider problem present in both tashigi and zoro's storylines as well (and the narrative also not compensating for them)

[cynettic]

Hello, can I request a reaction with childe, albedo, xiao and diluc where their SO is pretty clumsy and one day, they (the characters) just snap and say mean things? Please end it with comfort or something nice, my heart isnt strong enough to handle full angst :')

Clumsy S/O x Genshin

Summary - As someone clumsy, the genshin boys often pay special attention to your little accidents and mishaps. One day they snap, comforting ending though ;-;

Pairings - ClumsyReader x Childe / Albedo / Xiao / Diluc

Warnings - A bit of possessive behaviour for Xiao- but otherwise, a tad bit of angst at the beginning of each one.

A/N - After I wrote Albedo’s hc I realized that seeing him angry… would be really hot. Might write up a degradation one after-

Childe

“Stop it! It’s not funny anymore!”

It wasn’t surprising that once again, you’d managed to trip on your own feet and now somehow the vase sitting on the stool next to the couch had fallen… and broke.

But it was the first time you’d heard those words come from him.

“What do you mean… stop?”

Childe had never said anything about your clumsy antics, always picking you up and laughing or teasing the situation off. On the occasion that you got hurt, he’d tend to your wounds and make you promise to be more careful. Of course there was always a next time, and next time, and text time…

Until Childe had enough.

“From falling- tripping over your feet and taking down everything with you! No one tumbles around this much… so either you’re just doing this for fun or- or…”

He began to realize after those words that he’d taken it too far. When glancing at your teary eyes and how your figure started to shake he knew he couldn’t take those words back.

He knew it wasn’t your fault, he knew you tried to be as careful as you could.

But it was so frustrating.

You were still laying on the ground from the fall, and he bent down to help you up. You didn’t look him in the eyes, and an empty feeling buried itself in his stomach when you stood up.

“I’m… sorry.”

It was you who spoke these words, shoulders still shaking. You knew it might’ve been frustrating or annoying for Childe.

The two of you are just standing there, Childe feeling ten times guiltier because you apologized, and you feeling terrible because you’d broken another vase and he’d yelled at you for it.

The two of you feel so bad about it- ;-;

It isn’t till Childe acts out and pulls you into a hug that you realize he felt bad for yelling at you. Sure he may have been frustrated, but it was only cause he was worried about your well being, he didnt want you getting hurt.

“Im sorry Y/n… I didn’t mean to act out like that. I know you're trying your best.”

Albedo

“What happened.”

It was supposed to come out as a question, his eyes trailing over the mess of his lab and the sorry pitiful state it was in.

It didn’t come out sounding like a question.

Seeing Albedo angry of all things was only a myth among the knights of Favonius, a joke to Klee, and a topic never brought up to the citizens of Monstadt.

Albedo? Mad?? Impossible.

Well, you were living proof that it indeed wasnt a myth to see the alchemist angry.

“I fell…” was all you said in response to his glare. “I wasn’t paying attention and I tripped against the table… I’m sorry…”

Of course you were sorry, just waiting for Albedo to get home and maybe scanning the lab and all his experiments while he was away. No bad intentions, but unfortunately your bad habit of tripping over your own feet summoned itself at the worst moments.

Usually, Albedo would catch you with utmost ease. A reflex he’d learned from Klee before she went sprinting out to cause more of a ruckus. If you were to get hurt, he’d usher or carry you back into his house before patching you up. It was always quick and painless, but he made you repeat why you’d fell and how to avoid it.

Albedo wouldn’t be comforting you now.

“You fell?” He simply asked, his tone menacing enough to know that it was something important in that jumble of experiments. “You seem to do that a lot nowadays don’t you?”

You’re at a loss for words, “I’ll help you clean it up… I didn’t mean to-”

Not wanting to mention how the glass shards had cut your hand, you stood up with wobbly knees to start picking up the pieces of glass. You were sure your boyfriend had put a lot of work towards this, and you felt terrible for having ruined it all.

Albedo isn’t a savage tho.

He notices the cut on your palm, and your shaky figure as you begin to clean up the mess you’d made. He knows that cleaning up the lab as soon as possible is important, but you’re still his top priority.

“Come here.”

When you don’t immediately go to him, he walks to you. Taking your wrists and getting a good view of the injury. He tugs you to the doorway to get you fixed up, and realizes that you’re shaking, a little bit too much…

“It… seems I was a bit too harsh earlier.” He fully faces you, expression softening. “I’m sorry, I know you didn’t mean to, none of the items on the table were of any importance if it makes you feel better.”

Please let him wipe any stray tears if you do cry, he didn’t mean to sound so angry, and really doesn’t care too much about what was on that table. Poor man’s just had a tough day at work.

Xiao

“I worry for you, every single minute of every goddamn day- every moment that my eyes aren't on you! Why don’t you make it easier for me and just sit still?!”

Xiao is protective.

That fact is known, its accepted, you might even find it endearing.

But Xiao has lived a much longer life than you, he’s seen the people he loves crumple and drain away. Watched them fade from his life one at a time, so he’s dedicated to making sure you stick around.

He knows that eternity isn’t an option for you, so he makes sure that the time you both have together is s a f e . Which means yes, he will catch you every single time you fall. Especially if it’s off the Wangshu stairs that you somehow always trip on?

The poor boy worries excessively for you, so much that he will try to hurry up the process of clearing out the normal hilichurls or threats that lie around Liyue Port.

But on the very rare occasion that you somehow end up into trouble without him there…

You don’t yell “Xiao” like he told you to, you know he makes such an effort on making you safe, a bit too much… you don’t want to summon him to every trouble you have. You’re independent, one scrape isn’t going to kill you.

“I’m fine,” you simply say when he comes back to find your whole hand encompassed in bandages. “Just tripped.”

Xiao is not impressed.

He worries too much, far too much, and seeing you brush it off when he tries so hard to make sure you’re never in pain- he wishes you’d just sit still, wait for him and not trip on your own feet when doing such mundane things.

“I worry for you, every single minute of every goddamn day- every moment that my eyes aren't on you! Why don’t you make it easier for me and just sit still?!”

You’re obviously taken aback by the statement, “Xiao?” You offer him a comforting hug, trying to loosen his stiff muscles. “It’s impossible from protecting me from everything y’know… I appreciate your worry but I’m fine.”

But that’s a matter that is strained between the two of you, and will continue to be that way until either Xiao somehow lets go of his protective anxious faze, or you just accept it.

Either way, the boy will continue to catch you when you fall. Even if you broke apart from him, left him, you’d still occasionally feel the lightest touch when you trip over your feet and feel yourself steadied.

Diluc

“Are you doing this on purpose?!”

Just like Xiao, Diluc is fairly protective over you, especially if it concerns your health.

He’s often not quick enough to catch you, but instead picks you up in his arms and sits you on the table to make sure you’re not hurt.

You often get bruises, but nothing more serious. He makes sure to kiss them better- something you jokingly stated once, and he’s actually taken it seriously.

“Kissing it will make it feel better? You’re sure?”

Overall, Diluc was very understanding to your clumsy antics. Maybe even find it endearing on a hard day of work, either way, he’d never yell at you for it.

Until he had enough.

It’s exhausting, to hear something clatter and know that you’d probably tripped. Tripped and harmed yourself in one way or another, the options were infinite, and Diluc’s anxiety could heighten at the slightest crashing noise.

“Are you doing this on purpose?!”

Eventually it became too much and he asked you that exact question, hands tangling through his hair as he stared at you wide eyed, furious. There you were on the floor, just a single chair knocked down as you were beginning to shakily stand back up.

“No… of course not. I wouldn’t do these things for fun-“

It’s not like you enjoyed absentmindedly stumbling into objects, it just… happened. Diluc was usually so patient and understanding… so why?

“I know… it’s just...” he rubbed the temples on either side of his face with his thumbs, frown set in a line. “I keep worrying and worrying- every time I hear a noise like that…”

It doesn’t take long for him to sort this out through a conversation, and then settle that you need to be more mindful and careful, something you have to improve on. He will simply watch on the sidelines, catch you when he can, and coax you when you end up hurt.

[heyitsyn]

Manager!Inarizaki

a/n: aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa i would put in all the reqs but there were so many people who requested for our fox babies that it would literally take up every space :”) and im happy to comply so here it is

AAAA LOOK THEY’RE SO CUTE OMG LIKE BLS BUT IM A RIN SIMP :’)

alkdfjlsdfi

sunarin simp is typing😍🍃💞..........

ogeiogeiogei

hehehehehe

so im actually just going to include the starting lineup like i knowwwww theres subs but im only most familiar with the regulars :(

okay so anyways!!

now

you might be wondering

how in the hell did you become the manager of these crackheads

from calm papi kita to psycho tsumu,

why are you their manager

you, the cute and shy and innocent not wittle first year, somehow became the manager of the powerhouse volleyball team of inarizaki high

it all started with our dear lovely samu

hehe bet you didnt see that coming

now we all know baby samu literally is the biggest foodie in the team and he constantly thinks about food 24/7 therefore there isnt much room in there for anything else except for volleyball

basically, 

the dude loves to eat

it just so happens that you made food

your family owned a cafe down the street from the school and you worked there after school to help your parents

now how does this tie in with samu you ask

this chile was so hungry that he had to skip practice

sending kita a quick text about doing a quick errand, he walked down the street on the hunt for a quick place to grab a bite

he totally ignored kita’s warning of cramps if he ate a lot then practiced but whatever food is life

it just so happens he stumbles upon your family’s cafe

when he entered, the smell of bread and food entered his nostrils causing this baby to just float right in

you were manning the register while your brother was at school so you smiled at the incoming figure of this familiar boy

and because you recognized him, you couldnt help but grin and gasp a little

‘oh! miya-senpai!’

you exclaimed and osamu was confused because he’s never seen you before but he thought you were probably a kouhai in school

you looked young and definitely not a face he’s seen before so he concluded you were most likely a first year

and you were really cute

like really

really

cute

that thought caused this babe to blink awkwardly and nod at your direction

‘uh, hi’

he greeted and you smiled at his awkward nature

‘what can i get you today, miya-senpai?’

he must’ve been busy looking at you to actually look at the menu behind you and he fumbled, rushing to find a food to get

‘wh-what do ya recommend?’

he asked and you paused then thought deeply

‘hmm, we have onigiris freshly made! and we also have milk bread thats really good!’

did you just-

did you just say onigiri?

‘yea ill take some onigiri’

he decided and you lit up

‘perfect! the total is-’

he completely blanked out because wow your smile was really pretty

‘miya-senpai? miya-senpai?’

you called out and he snapped out of it

‘oh, sorry, here’

he gave you the cash and you gave him back his change before wandering to the glass case where the savory foods were placed

you seemed to glide over and osamu watched you with fond eyes, interest bubbling in him

there was something about you that made him curious

but he just didnt know what

it confused him because maybe you were just someone he hasnt seen before and not the same fans he sees all the time

‘you’re really lucky, miya-senpai. i just finished making them minutes before you walked in’

you commented

this took him aback

‘you cook?’

he suddenly asked and you chuckled, soft and airy laughs filling the air

‘of course, senpai! learning to cook is an essential for a business like this’

and thus created a beautiful friendship

he would come over to eat nearly every day of the week while you would happily serve him

sometimes, he would even buy extra so you could eat with him

while you were talking, he noticed you lacked the accent others from there had and he thought you were not originally from hyogo

he learned that you were actually from miyagi and you moved here just this year

‘so, how ya liking it ‘round here?’

he asked one day, after swallowing his food

you thought about it before shrugging

‘i mean, its still the countryside so i guess everything’s the same. maybe the dialect? my neighbors have strong accents, haha’

samu chuckled

‘its common over here. ya sound a lot more from tokyo. my best friend’s from there, ya see’

you raised an eyebrow

‘hm?’

‘rin. suna rin is in the team and hes from tokyo so he sounds like a standard city boy. ill take ya to meet him sometime’

nah he really wasnt

he wanted to keep you away from the others as much as possible, especially his brother, because he was a greasy mf

but that didnt really work out into plan because you approached him in school the other day

you saw him and you hurriedly ran to him where he stood with his twin and some guy

tsumu saw you coming from behind his brother and he smirked before nodding at you

‘samu, ya got a girlie running for ya’

samu turned, confused, until he saw your adorable face

‘y/n. whats up?’

you grinned

‘you left your team jacket, miya-senpai’

the red jacket was clutched in your hands and the two boys behind him shared a surprised look because osamu never mentioned a girlfriend

and with the way you were holding his jacket, the two boys immediately jumped into conclusions

well

more like atsumu started whining at osamu for not telling him he had a girl

‘i thought we were brothers! brothers for life!’

samu just awkwardly stands there and he has a sheepish look in his eyes that were looking at you apologetically

‘sorry about him, y/n. but thank you for returning it’

you handed him the fabric before smiling

‘it was a good thing you had a spare one for me, miya-senpai. who knew the rain would come so suddenly’

osamu sighed then playfully poked your forehead with his finger

‘how many times do i have to tell you to call me by my first name? i really dont want to hear anything that associates me with this bastard’

atsumu socked osamu at the shoulder causing the gray-haired boy to look away from you and start yelling at his brother

‘touch me again! see what happens then!’

‘yer just showing off for yer girlie! ya aint doin nothing!’

suna shook his head before turning to you with a sympathetic look

‘you really want to be with this guy? him and this idiot are practically a package’

you tilted your head

‘im,,, not with miya-senpai?’

suna blinked

‘but he gave you his jacket. he doesnt even give it to me. i guess its not part of best friend privileges’

at the mention of best friend, you lit up

‘oh! you must be sunarin! the tokyo boy!’

baby rin choked a little at the sight of your grin and he scrunched his eyebrows while awkwardly raising the corner of his lips to a smile

‘you,, uh,,, you know me?’

like it was the most obvious thing in the world, you nodded

‘at first, when miya-senpai told me, i didnt know who you were. but! youre actually very popular, suna-senpai! too bad i never saw you until today, though, because we’re in different floors. but! a lot of girls talk about you!’

poor rin didnt know how to react to that because he didnt want to look flustered but he didnt want to look cocky either

so he just opted to smile gently

‘oh. well, in that case. let me introduce myself to you. suna rintaro’

can we normalize suna being an actual nice guy instead of the cold stand-offish player bastard?

you shook his hand and said your name as well

like samu, he asked you to call him by his first name too since you were close to his friend therefore should try being close to you too

speaking of samu, him and atsumu reduced the violence to just bickering and they were still teasing each other even after you and suna talked

the coochi bangs boy rolled his eyes then slapped atsumu’s arm to gain their attention

‘yo. theres a girl here. try and be nice and civil’

atsumu seems like he forgot your existence because his eyes brightened at the sight of you

‘oh! heya!’

you nervously smiled at him because his hyperness and overall atsumu-ness was quite overwhelming

‘h-hello, miya-senpai’

atsumu pouted at how apprehensive you sounded

‘eyyy, why are you being nervous, girlie? im just samu, yanno! same face and everything!’

osamu knew you well enough that you were kinda awkward and you didnt know how to approach a hyper person like his brother so he naturally saved you

‘hey, y/n, the bell’s about to ring any moment now so try to not be late and ill be sure to see you later. do you want me to pick you up from your class and we can walk together?’

to you, it was just a simple offer from a friend but to the two, that was the confirmation of your relationship with the wing spiker

‘wahh, atsumu, your brother really is better than you. he knows how to treat girls good’

atsumu took offense to this

‘excuse you! i would be too if there were genuine girls in this school!’

osamu’s aggressive blinking was his signal for you to hurry along and you noticed causing you to chuckle before bidding goodbye

‘it was nice meeting you, rin-senpai. and,,, you too, miya-senpai. samu-senpai, later at 3?’

osamu softly smiled while nodding

‘later at 3’

the TEASING HE FACED from the two was unbearable and despite the amount of times he denied it, they were still teasing him

‘samu’s got a girlfriend~! samu’s got a girlfriend~!’

‘tsumu, i swear to god if you dont shut your trap’

‘imagine having a girlfriend’

true to his word, osamu was waiting for ya at the bottom of the stairwell from the one that led to the second floor, absentmindedly kicking some invisible thing in the floor

you were fixing your bag straps on your shoulders when you saw him at the end of the hallway and you couldnt contain your excitement seeing the grey haired boy

‘samu-senpai!!’

you shouted, getting his attention that made him whip his head up

the blank face contorted into a small smile and he raised a hand

‘yo’

when you made it next to him, you were grinning really big and samu felt flustered at your happy face

so he cupped your chin with his large hand that allowed him to squeeze both cheeks

‘cutie’

he mumbled but you didnt catch it, too busy trying to get him to stop squishing

you were originally supposed to go walk over to the cafe but you didnt know that osamu was actually trying to skip practice and he was trying to hide from the members

okay first off, i dont think samu would ever skip practice willingly bc he has the same drive as miya atsumu but he also just wants to spend time with you asklfjldfjdlk

but the loud mouth tsumu saw you guys as you turned a hallway

you were busy talking to osamu about some cooking chef guy gordon and he was nodding and talking but then he heard a loud shout

‘SAMU!’

osamu babie didnt know what was happening so he protectively placed an arm in front of you and hurriedly shoved you behind him in case something happened

duh you didnt know what was happening either so you were clutching his jacket and peeked from his arm to see atsumu stomping over with suna trailing behind him, seemingly texting on his phone

osamu lazily glared at his brother

‘what’

atsumu blanched and sped walk faster until he was right in front of him to yell 

‘IM TIRED OF YER EXCUSES! JUST CUS YA GOT YASELF A GIRLIE DUN MEAN YA GET TO SKIP PRACTICE!’

you furrowed your eyebrows

you tugged at his jacket and osamu turned to peer down at you and he gulped, preparing himself to hear your scolding

it wasnt the first time you scolded him as you just told him off the other day for not eating enough vegetables and fruits to balance out his unhealthy love for onigiri and sweets

‘samu-senpai,,, you told me you guys were taking an off week. why are you skipping practice today’

you were genuinely worried and you didnt seem to understand why he did that but the other two did and atsumu didnt hesitate

‘CUS HE WANTS TA SPEND TIME WITH YA, Y/N! BASTARD CANT EVEN BOTHER TO TELL ME THE REASON! YER SICK?! WHAT THE HELL EXCUSE IS THAT! YA NEVER GET SICK!’

poor suna is just watching this go down and he felt bad that you were caught in the middle

so he suggested a compromise

you watched sunarin push atsumu’s chest to make him back off and he gently smiled at you before looking at the two

‘how about we all go to practice and if y/n-chan wants, she can wait and osamu can spend time with her when hes done? besides, atsumu, you know osamu has been doing good on his spikes. maybe we can persuade coach and kita to let him off early since hes,,, quote unquote,, ‘sick’’

osamu debated but you emerged from behind him

‘sure! samu-senpai would love to go to practice! right, samu-senpai?’

you smiled at him but it was a stern smile

you just wanted him to go to practice because you knew now of how important volleyball was to the school and they needed to get all their time and energy to win the sport

atsumu agreed to this plan but osamu was forced to accept it

simp

just for extra measure, sunarin and tsumu walked behind you guys to the gym so you and samu had time to talk

you were chiding him of course because why would he waste time with spending time with you

‘just wanted to see ya, y/n-chan’

he winked but you pouted and wrinkled your nose

‘you cant weasel yourself out of this, samu-senpai’

osamu has never heard you scold him before so he was like o.o but inside he was like,,, hot

the gym was already on full practice and kita saw the second years from the door

aran LAKDJFLAKSFJLASDKF ARAN AAAAAAAAAAAAA nudged mimi with a smirk

as much as they loved the underclassmen, watching them get told off by kita was too funny to not watch

but what caused them to curiously peer behind the three was the appearance of a girl

a girl?

‘why’s a girl with them?’

aran mumbled and mimi shrugged, but also intrigued

you were behind osamu and he could tell you were nervous because youve heard of the reputation of the team

they were seen as practically as popular as the basketball team and everyone worshipped them

they were who put the school’s name in the map and you were about to meet the legends of inarizaki

thankfully, atsumu and rin walked to the front of you two so you and samu were at the back

samu didnt look at you but he reached behind him to open his palm as a signal for you to take it

you gratefully grabbed it and leaned closer in case something happens

‘KITA-SAN! WE GOT EM!’

atsumu shouted and suna chided him for being really loud

‘you’re late’

an even voice said in front of them and you leaned over to the side to see who it was from

your eyes bulged out of your head because one, wow he was handsome, and two, he looked like someone from miyagi

YALL KNOW WHO IM TALKING ABOUT BYE-

‘oh wow’

you mumbled absentmindedly and samu looked at you at the corner of his eye before scoffing

your face was totally bright red and your eyes were super wide

kita? really? of all guys? it was kita?

‘SORRY! was samu who took so long!’

atsumu lowered his voice down but he didnt tell the captain of his brother’s plans to skip

‘he has a stomachache and he was at the nurse’s office’

suna smoothly came up with a lie and he might look cool and calm, his hands were clasped behind him with it clenching his phone

your eyes left kita to notice that habit and you had a small smile because it was another reassurance that these boys werent as high and legendary as everyone made them to be

in the end they were still just students and boys

they were still human

‘oi, osamu, who’s the girl?’

aran finally bit the bullet and asked the question everyone has been wondering since the beginning

both you and samu stiffened at the direct question to you but he nodded

‘this is l/n y/n’

he introduced and you raised a shaky hand as a greeting but let go of samu to bow slightly to your seniors

‘hello, my name is l/n y/n, i’m a first year’

a few players also raised a hand but it was mimi who spoke at last

‘nice to meet you’

kita nodded at you but turned to the three

‘why is she with you? are you skipping again, osamu?’

again?

osamu inwardly cringed 

obviously, kita was sharper than they would think because he easily saw through suna’s lie

he also knew that samu never really got sick

he watched the younger shovel 5 bowls of ramen and still have enough room eat a plate of mochi and he was perfectly fine

it was silent between the four of you and atsumu and suna were looking at each other as they ran out of lies

dang they even planned the entire walk of what to say to kita

you looked between the twins and their friend before speaking up

‘samu-senpai really did have a stomachache. i was-uh-helping the nurse! um, i want to be a doctor or a nurse when i grow up! and-’

you started to ramble but because you were trying to lie and it was never your forte

ALKESDJFLKD Y/N I NEED TO TAKE YOU UNDER MY WING WE NEED TO TEACH YOU THIS IMPORTANT LIFE SKILL OMG

‘we were tryin to convince y/n to be a manager. thats why we took so long’

atsumu huffed

you froze

a what?

a manager?

you were genuinely truthful about wanting to go into a medical profession but not a manager

you were already a manager before and you didnt really want to do it again

kita was inspecting suna’s and atsumu’s and osamu’s faces to see a trace of dishonesty

you saw him raise a dark eyebrow and you knew then that these three cannot tell a lie to save their life

so you nodded frantically making kita look at you

‘mhm! they asked me! miya-san wanted someone they knew already so they asked me because i’m samu-senpai’s friend! so here i am!’

your awkward smile and stiff outstretched arms might’ve seem suspicious but kita moved his gaze from you to atsumu and the blonde nodded

‘yea! ya’ve been talkin bout bein worried of next year cus yall aint here no more so i got sum person responsible enough fer us!’

STOPP I HATE IT HERE I CANT SEEM TO WRITE OUT ATSUMU’S ACCENT LIKE AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

after the longest 3 seconds, kita finally nodded and closed his eyes warily

‘alright. l/n-san, come here’

you froze at the way he said your name but suna was kind enough to walk over to your place beside samu to gently push you forward to kita

‘its okay’

he mumbled and you were so thankful because that gave you enough motivation and strength to keep going

your height was staggering between these men and kita seemed to tower you

but you kept an even and calm face 

‘yes?’

you asked

kita looked at you and he stared at your face, pupils moving as a sign that he was inspecting your eyes and every feature 

oh my god you shouldve plucked your nose hairs this morning

before you could feel more self-conscious, he spoke

‘you said you want to be a doctor?’

‘well, more like a nurse but um same thing’

‘you know medical stuff? know how to treat injuries?’

‘yes. i was a manager back in my hometown so i have experience’

‘where are you from?’

‘miyagi’

‘ya familiar with shiratorizawa?’

you cringed but nodded

‘yes’

‘are you from there?’

‘yes’

the three stooges from behind you had wide eyes at this sudden revelation because that was a school theyve played before

even the last interhigh, they were familiar of how strong that school was

the eagle and the guess monster

and you were their manager before? 

must’ve been during middle school as you were just a first year

‘so you know how plays and stats work?’

‘yes. anything you want me to do, im familiar and capable to do it’

god why are you saying this

you didnt even want to be a manager in the first place

yet here you are again

you were getting flashbacks from the war ajkfdfd

kita looked at you silently once more before finally standing up straight and pointing you to their coach who was watching the whole thing with crossed arms and furrowed brows

‘there. talk to him and you can finalize everything. i think its too early to say this but nonetheless, welcome to the team, y/n’

AND THUS STARTED YOUR JOURNEY WITH THE BOYS

akldjklfjsdlakj

IT WAS ALL BUILT ON LIES BUT WHATEVER

AS LONG AS NO ONE DIED ISSOKAY

no but really dont tell lies in general yall, maybe white lies, but try not to do that

OKAY MOVING ON

MOMENTS WITH THE TEAM

duh you are much much closer to samu than the rest of the team so you tended to stick to him more

like you would go to him first if you needed something or if you wanted someone to help you with the crate, he would be your go-to

that would make atsumu whine because he felt that samu was better than him

‘oi, y/n! im really good with ma arms! i can bench 300 yanno?’

you politely smiled and nodded

‘thank you for telling me, miya-san’

then you would proceed to nudge samu’s arm yum to ask for help

butbutbutbut

dont worry!!!!

you do end up warming up to him

for my atsumu stans, yall tend to go to him when samu is either busy or you just need a good laugh

this mans will embarrass himself both on purpose or accidentally to make you laugh lmao

you also have extra bottles for his medicine because he has adhd and the guys are like,,,, yo chill

and duh atsumu would forget to take them so youre practically his reminder

we all know how tsumu was practically attacked that one time when he insulted those girls, right?

yall may have forgiven but i will never forget >:(

well, during matches, you as their manager, always have to tell the stands to be quiet when atsumu is serving 

but no one told you this

you kind of figured it out during your time like when his eye would twitch if samu was talking to suna too loudly or when he would close his eyes to shut off his hearing because of the loud spikes on the other side

you noticed it

so you would go to the stands and nicely tell them that if they see atsumu serving, to be quiet

‘i understand you are all excited when he does his serve but we would all benefit more you could release that excitement inside and silently’

*cue atsumu pretending to faint in sunas arms*

OH SPEAKING OF SUNA

YES I SAID THAT I DONT REALLY LIKE FANON SUNA BC,,,

WEED

AND DRUGS

AND RUDE 

JUST OVERALL

NOT RECOMMENDED

but canon suna :”)

as a player, suna is seen as really manipulative and snarky and witty

he loves to poke fun at the other team, even his own, and just all-around annoying

but off-court

suna is a very quiet and reserved person

totally different from the one who talks and yaps constantly to the other side of the net

and hes a really pure person in some topics

like he would turn red when you would compliment his new picture that he posted in inasgram 

PLEASE SUNA IS TOTALLY A PHOTOGRAPHER LIKE HE TAKES PICTURES OF SUNSETS AND STUFF

or when you would offer to bandage him up for him because it’s hard to do it himself and your hand would touch his

dont tell anyone this but suna is very relieved that you and samu weren’t dating

thats all

thats all for now

;)

OOOO kita!!!

okay so kita is the captain, right?

but he doesnt play

like he plays rarely and aran is usually the on-court captain

this causes you and him to be at the sidelines a lot

he would tell you what he thinks would happen next or what the next plan should be and you would provide your own input

in a way, he was the one who really taught you the mechanics of volleyball and he would tell you the different tricks that techniques that the twins came up with 

what makes you really soft and fall for him is when he starts to compliment his players

his pride in aran for being one of the top aces that has led them to nationals

his pride in mimi for being able to go on the longest on court and not be tired

his pride on akagi for being able to receive each ball and successfully give it to their setter

his pride on hitoshi for being the one who could handle the team personality wise and his plans for him to be his successor

his pride on ATSUmu for being the best setter he’s ever seen and his drive to get better no matter what

his pride on samu for being so strong and still getting stronger despite his dream career to be something not volleyball-related

his pride on sunA being motivated enough to help the team and make sure everyone knows that every ball can be stopped

like pls you almost cry all the time when you hear kita saying that because he seems to not say it to the others but only to you

it makes you happy that kita relies so much on these guys as much as they rely on him

OH MY GOSH OMIMI

okay

so omimi ren is a very quiet and calm character

hes kinda like suna where they dont really say much but when they do, its usually important and not irrelevant like atsumu

and he didnt say much when you got inducted in the team as a manager

like he just stared at you and you were just like o.o

ngl he did scare you a bit bc of his tall height looming over you and the way his dark eyes just pierces you through your soul

hes the type that you cannot willingly tell a lie to him bc you know he will find out one way or another

he can see right through you

maybe thats what makes him such a good middle blocker

but you started to warm up to him really quick and he would sometimes walk you home if the others cant mainly bc he knows his appearance will make anyone back off

its the simple things that make you appreciate him

two words: ginjima hitoshi

he is so two-faced

NO LISTEN BEFORE YALL BEAT ME UP JUST HEAR ME OUT

you know how like the 4 second years (PLEASE I KNOW THERES A GUY NAMED YUTO BUT LIKE I DONT KNOW MUCH ABOUT HIM AAAAAA TELL ME IF YOU WANT HIM IN HERE)

like suna, the twins, and hitoshi

the twins are the annoying ones who causes trouble, suna is the one taking pictures and evidence while cheering them on, and hitoshi is the one trying to break it up

BUT

i think that hitoshi is really the worst out of the 4 and he keeps in because who else would be the responsible one of the bunch

hello? they were about to be third years next year like are we really gonna go on with possibly a miya twin or suna being captain?

no

so he tries to force down his inner chaos to take on the role of the responsible one

BUTTTTT

you try to release that inner chaos

you sometimes hear him egging on atsumu under his breath like ‘do it’ but quietly so no one hears him

and youre like

?-?

please? we’re not? supposed? to allow? atsumu? to eat? and swallow? a whole? raw egg?

at first, duh he was also like that with you but you want him to be himself and be comfortable with you so you work hard to make him open up

now

you kinda regret it

because he now wants to go through the mcdonalds drive-thru, with no car, just to get mcflurries

you stared down at hitoshi from your bedroom window with a confused expression

‘but? you dont have a car?’

he grins up at you

‘but i got a CART! they said as long as it’s a car and car is in the word cart and the extra ‘t’ is just a bonus!’

‘hitoshi no-’

AAAAAA MICHIMICHI BABY

so akagi is the libero of the team and he is the one responsible for the make sure the ball doesnt touch the ground type of thing

you get really worried about him bc he does a lot of flying saves and his knees always get roughed up and such

so you try and stitch him up as much as you can like you even send him sites for good warm packs to buy

something that isnt known about akagi is that he, like atsumu, really likes to cook

but more like

he bakes

he bakes as a stress reliever and its like his meditation time

you go over to his house a lot to go bake something w him and share it to the guys later on

during ina get-togethers, him and samu are in charged of the food while youre the sous chef

SPEAKING OF SAMU

we forgot about him for a sec aldfjklkfdjlk 

it was all thanks to him

because of him, you became a manager despite your initial refusal to become one again

you made friends with more people and you were able to have a fun high school life because of it

because of him

osamu does get a little sad or irritated whenever the guys start to hog you up

like he has to push down the tantrum of ‘I SAW HER FIRST!’

he wants to be the better twin lmao

he gets really butthurt when you would go to someone else even during the middle of your conversation

like he would be talking to you on the side but suna calls you over for tape and youre going

he pouts and atsumu teases him about it causing him to bark at him

LOL HE BARKS

okay so training camp

i think therell be an imagine for this so ill try to not make it as detailed

lets just say its a mess

suna really wants to go hiking bc he wants to go the top of the mountain for pictures of the stars and stuff

but atsumu whines of the bugs and possible creatures in there

this causes osamu to tease him and call him a coward and a wimp

and leads to a fight which aran tries to break up but gets sucked in anyways

and omimi just stands by and watches but he intends to intervene if it gets too much

then akagi gets taken by suna to go the hike with him even though hes scared of bugs so hes whimpering and complaining

while kita and hitoshi are off in the kitchen talking about new grains of flour and stuff

where are you?

youre at the lodge, drinking your f/d (favorite drink) and watching all this go down bc at training camp, it’s every man for themselves

there is a lot of bonding times as a team bc these boys may seem like all they think about is volleyball but they like to do something else outside of that

what they love the most is going to the beach

not only do they get to have fun, they get to relax and see you in a swimsuit alkfdjkfj

especially when kita accidentally falls asleep? they bury him with sand and make him look like a mermaid

because they are players who work out so great bodies duh

and they get so much attention for that

but they all mainly pay attention to you and oh my

youve expressed not being comfortable in wearing a swim suit and watch these guys absolutely start throwing compliments at you

but the third years would softly tell you that it’s okay not to wear one bc all that matters is if youre comfortable or not

HELP I WANT AN ARAN AAAAAAAAAAA

OH SO

we know how kita’s family are rice farmers, right?

well

he farms to help his granny and sometimes, youre the only one who’s free enough to go and help him 

so you go over there all the time and granny really loves you bc one, you take care of her shin and thats beyond everything, and two, youre reliable and make shin laugh and such

like one time, you were carrying a basket to the back deck and granny saw you from the kitchen

she smiled before waddling over to the door so she could talk to you

‘y/n-chan!’

you whipped around quickly at the call of your name before grinning and hurrying up to her

‘yes, granny?’

she gave you a bottled water then gestured down to the field where shin was tirelessly tending to the rice

‘please give that to shinsuke. poor boy has been pushing himself too hard with the field and his sport and not taking care of himself’

she chided but there was a certain hint in her tone that made her sound so proud of her grandson

you looked down at the bottle and squeezed it

‘kita-san works hard not for himself, but for everyone else. it makes me sad when he neglects his health and tends to the team instead. so dont worry, baa-chan! i’ll take care of kita-san for him! for you!’

nah bc granny was already gossiping with her neighborhood ladies about this beautiful girl that shin got and how they should be jealous their grandsons don’t have someone like you

OOOOOOO 

since your family owns a cafe, the guys goes there all the time

its kinda like the ramen shop for the seijoh boys

they go there mainly to see you even outside of practice ANDDD

they wanna look good in front of your family

like tsumu suddenly knows cleanliness bc he cleans up the mess on the table or kita is no longer an introvert as hes now talking to your mom about the benefits of rice water and her not needing one bc her hair is already beautiful

PLEASE WHAT

and even during the summer, theyve helped out a lot when it was busy lunch times and you couldnt handle it yourself

GOSH IMAGINE SAMU BEING YOUR MOM’S APPRENTICE AND HANDSOME BOYS TAKING YOUR ORDERS WHILE SOME ARE CARRYING HEAVY TRAYS THAT MAKE THEIR ARMS POP

okay imma stop now

OH DONT GET ME STARTED DURING THE DEFEAT WITH KARASUNO

I DONT CARE YALL CAN HATE ME FOR SAYING THIS BUT KARASUNO SHOULDNT HAVE WON LIKE INARIZAKI WERE LITERALLY THE SECOND PLACE IN NATIONALS AND COMPETED AGAINST I T A C H I Y A M A

LIKE WHAT

OKAY ANYWAYS

everyone was already down and moody bc of the loss

and you wanted to be at the back bc you didnt know how to handle the situation

in your time as their manager, not once have you seen them lose

during those 10 months of being a manager, you have not once seen them be defeated during a game even with practice matches

then with those nobodies?

karasuno?

last time you checked, karasuno went down under when coach ukai retired

so having them lose was a real shock

and a really bad event

there was a certain air around you all during the bus ride to the hotel which made the entire time very uncomfortable

everyone finished their crying either in the locker rooms or the bathroom so all that was left was their red eyes

the coach sent everyone off to bed and although they were allowed more days to stay, they all collectively chose to just go home and keep those excused days as a rest day

‘we all would like to just stay at home and recharge’

kita’s request was everyone else’s, even yours, as you were both worried and tired for the boys

so that night, the coaches were able to book train tickets for everyone the next day back home

you stayed up, watching tv in your own room out of boredom because the group chat was quiet and you were too tired to do anything else

the next day, everyone 

osamu claimed your shoulder and he held your hand tight with his

his breathing was ragged and even with his closed eyes, the redness around them made it obvious he had been crying

the bus that was filled with excitement before, became quiet and the sound of the engine and wheels took over the silence

you thought samu had fallen asleep so you raised your free hand to stroke his hair

‘hey y/n?’

you flinched at the surprise but hummed 

‘imma tell him today. later, but today’

his voice was low and he was murmuring to hint that this was the extra sensitive topic you both discussed a few days ago at the cafe

you nodded but made sure he knew that no matter, he still got you

the coaches were upset and mad at the loss

but in the end, they all realized that this was the last game the boys would play as a team

sure, they could have practice matches and they could play again together in the future but nothing would change the atmosphere and feeling of playing the important matches 

this was the team that brought them closest to nationals with placing second out of the entire country

they were a good team that somehow got defeated

but the coaches were still proud

they didnt even yell at the boys to take laps and instead brought them into a team meeting

you stood beside the coaches, your own sniffles with everyone else, and listened to them talk

‘-year has been the most productive this school’s team has had in decades. i hope you all are proud of yourselves as we are proud of you. you lost so you are no longer in the competition and we talk about it tomorrow. but for now, go home and take a rest because tomorrow, we will be running laps and drills and miss y/n will be timing you until you pass out from exhaustion’

you blankly looked at the coaches bc you thought this would be a heartwarming talk but quickly turned into a threat

‘but thats for tomorrow. so go home and rest up. expect what is to come’

you were just wanting to leave lmao

like you wanted to hurry home and make something for the guys to eat tomorrow

just do something to make them at least smile

the guys were quietly packing up and you watched them with trembling eyes at their dismissal

you wanted them to stay longer

stay here and laugh and mess around

like tsumu poking kita and pretending he didnt

or mimi talking about something and aran staring blankly at him but he’s really sleeping with his eyes open and startling him awake

‘guys!’

you shouted

they all stopped and turned to look at you

‘hm?’

hitoshi asked

you hurriedly looked around to find something to stall them here and you noticed the cherry blossom tree that’s blooming 

must be the time of the year

‘l-lets! have a-take a picture! outside! by the tree!’

you pointed and they looked at each other

you were acting strangely

but they were simps for you so they just nodded and went outside

they didnt even complain and went to stand out in front of the tree

you had your phone and pulled it to the camera app to raise it to get the team in the frame

they looked sad and tired and worn out but they were still trying to joke around and have natural smiles

‘closer, you guys! bunch in closer!’

you motioned with one hand but they stopped

‘um? y/n? aren’t you gonna join us?’

ren asked but you shook your head

‘its? for you guys? besides, no one will take it for us, silly’

the boys insisted on you prop it up on a bench over there because they wanted you there with them

‘hey, come here! lets all be in it!’

aran shouted and you had no choice but to follow them

the boys had to stand closer to the camera as the bench was a ways ahead of the tree but dont worry, the tree is still there

they wanted you in the front bc they were all taller than you but they really wanted to showcase you

you were their manager and the person who took care of them

they treasure you so much

‘smile!!!’

someone shouted and the timer hit zero and the picture was taken

sure, their school’s motto was that they didnt need things like memories

to not have anything tying you down to the past and to challenge yourself with everyone focusing on the future ahead

in years from now, you could just be another thing from their past and nothing else

but they would be damned if that happened

any fragment of you to remind them of the best time of their youth and the person who loved them more than anyone else did

so yea, sure they wanted to represent their school’s motto

but this time

they can make an exception

a/n: HII!!!! IM BACK AND SUDDENLY IM ABLE TO WRITE AND FINISH THIS I SWEAR I CANT BELIEVE IT TOOK ME THIS LONG TO PUBLISH THIS I CANT WITH THIS YALL IM LOWKEY DISAPPOINTED IN MYSELF AND IM ASHAMED IM SO SORRY

[virtual-luvr]

DISCLAIMER: spoilers for chainsaw man up ahead, hints of gore and death, I hope you enjoy :D

No one.

There was nothing, and no one.

You open your eyes and you're met with the sunlight peeking through a window.

It was calm, a little bit too calm.

Where is Denji? Why is there no noise?

Usually at this hour Denji would be waking you up with the sound of his loud voice or maybe even throwing Pochita onto your chest.

So...why hasn't that happened yet?

Panic started to set, so you rose from your makeshift bed on the floor and jumped up.

You searched all the rooms in the small house.

No one.

Denji never left without, atleast, a note or he would try and wake you up to let you know he was off.

Denji was gone, no trace of him anywhere. Where the hell could he have gone, he defenetly couldnt have gone too far, could he?

This was just not what you were used to, maybe you're just overreacting.

Denji would come back, he was just running an errand, he would be back in no time.

Atleast thats what you'd hoped for.

You waited for what felt like hours, each look at the closed door making you feel more anxious and sick.

It was nearing noon and there was still no sign of Denji, you hadn't been able to eat anything, and you tried your best to look around for him. Even going as far as to ask people walking around if they had seen a certain blonde haired boy running around.

But still no sign of Denji.

You walk around for a bit more, even holding one of Pochitas favorite treats to see if they would atleast come home.

No one.

Before you could take a step back and go back home to your small house, noise erupted.

Very peculiar noise, a chainsaw.

The noise gave you hope, you knew what it was!

It was Pochita, it had to be Pochita, you finally could be able to see Denji again.

You run towards the noise not even caring about your shoes getting even more dirty then they already were, you were just worried about Denji and Pochita.

As you look up, you're met with the peculiar site of what you could only imagine was a warehouse.

You had no time to process though, because soon enough the rearing of a chainsaw was heard once again and you ran in.

Blood.

Blood was everywhere.

There were more bodies then you could ever count, what the fuck was happening.

You had no clue, you couldnt even step one more foot in because you'd be stepping on pools of blood and guts.

The smell was awful, you almost ran away right then and there.

But you couldnt, Denji and Pochita had to be around here somewhere.

Looking up, your eyes meet a sight you never expected to see.

A devil, but that wasnt what your eyes were really fixed on.

No, your eyes were fixed on whoever had a chainsaw for a head.

Maybe it would have been better if you stayed back at home.

You started to regret your decision of looking for Denji, this wasnt a pleasent scene and it isnt something you wanted to look at for much longer.

Before you can take a step back, blood splatters all over you and the devil falls to the floor. It smelled horrible, how were you going to get this off, you and Denji never had the money for a water bill of all things.

You curse in your head before looking at the culprit for the devils death.

Said culrpit had been screaming amd yelling almost all through the fight.

His voice sounded so familiar, you didnt want to admit it but you had an idea on who it was.

Tall, teenage and idiotic boy, yep that was Denji.

And if thats a chainsaw, that must mean Pochita had probably fused with him.

You had read and learned about this once before, before it all went down hill for your life. It was something interesting, but you never thought it would happen to Denji.

It broke your heart to think about Pochita dying, but you couldnt think about it for too long.

"Someone beat us to it" you hear someone say, it kicks you back into your senses.

You run away from Denjis, now almost passed out, body. Scampering off to one of the storage units in the warehouse and hiding behind it, you could only hope that whoever said that wasn't able to see you.

You recognized that voice as well, how could your forget, she had taken your parents away from you.

Makima was her name, wasnt it? You certainly didnt expect to be seeing her after all these years.

But, alas, your paths seemed to cross.

That was an inconvenience at the moment though, so you decide to hide instead of having her catch you.

You only hoped that she wouldnt do anything bad to Denji.

Taking a risk, you peek your head over the storage unit, dull eyes meet yours.

She had seen you.

Even thought Makima had seen you though, she made no move to get you out from behind the storage unit.

Instead she decided to keep talking to Denji.

You couldnt hear much of the conversation, but what you were able to catch from it made you worry more for Denji.

Makima slowly picks up Denjis body before going back to a black car.

As soon as you hear the engine roar to life and started running, you bolt out from behind the storage unit and run behind the car.

Makima tilts her head with a smile as she sees you running behind the car before coming to a stop, looking at her with whatever emotion you had left.

Anger, resentment, sadness, anything.

You were alone again, no one to accompany you.

No one.

[1000 words; april/8/21]

[that-one-weeb-but-starwars]

My Love| Echo (part 6 beejesus...)

Notes: this ones short my bad, also this way shock you. I also have a strong urge to make hondo show up perhaps in the Future

Warnings: sad flashbacks, death and disease mentioned, cannablistic mentions (not eating anyone but like the word), cursing,

Reader: Male

Part: 1 | 2 | 3 | 3.5 | 4 | 5 | 6 (you're hah here)

Masterlist

That wasn't possible.

"What a shame." Maul spoke, turning himself around and walking away the Pyke leader following him.

This was wrong.

"If we came for this it better be important." Hunter spoke snatching the drive, "we leave now,"

"Me and Jacob they'll return you to your ship." The teen spoke up, "but be quick we'll need to leave with the transports."

It was a silent stealthy journey back to the ship, Echo being pushed along the way by Wrecker mostly as he was trying to process what was being told to him.

So...Y/n was dead? No that was possible- they couldn't of killed everyone.

He walked onto the ship the twins wishing them luck as they rushed back off into the darkness. He took a seat on his bunk, removing the head gear and mask, his gaze trapped within the grain of the metal.

"Tech get us out of here." Hunter demanded.

Wrecker watched Echo, his brows furrowed and in conflict.

"Hey. Kid." Wrecker spoke nudging Omega softly, "Good job out there."

"I just stuck to the plan." She smiled.

"Wanna do one more mission?" He asked playfully she nodded happily.

"Go find Lula. I think someone needs her." Wrecker spoke as Omega nodded rushing to find the Tooka doll.

Wrecker walked over to Echo, sitting across from the reg, Echo kept his gaze down.

"Hey."

"I don't, I don't understand." Echo responded, "I- I don't..."

"It's okay-" Wrecker tried to speak.

"But it isnt." Echo seethed.

The sudden jolt told them they had jumped to hyperspace. Echo rubbed over his eyes.

"What was Y/n's family doing associated with the Empire..." Echo spoke, "I...I don't..."

Wrecker frowned, Hunter watching the cockpits doorway, his brother lost and confused, let down and heart broken.

Walking into the cockpit the door closed behind him.

"You'll want to see this Hunter." Tech spoke, "Echo was right."

Hunter took a seat, "Y/n's code name is Rosyln then?"

"In a sense yes, yet It is many things." Tech informed, "It's multiple things, a name, a code name, a secret military operation."

" a what." Hunter demanded answers now.

"On this disk it says Project Rosyln was ment to help in implicating...hunger in a sense.."

"Hunger?" Hunter asked, "Hunger for what?"

"Flesh, sentinel flesh," Tech responded, "They had many failis dead on contacts, until. Rosyln."

"The dead brother of Y/n's Echo mention." Hunter spoke as Tech nodded.

"He survived it, partially, resulting in an outdated inner rim disease known as Cancer." Tech responded, "though it is not sepcified what type, he died young."

"So how does Y/n fit into it?"

"Rosyln was Y/n's younger brother by adoption law on corosaunt, and the Zabrack was not lying when he said The L/n family was ontop the imperals kill list, it was ment for them to go into hiding, to essentially metophorically and phsycially slip into the dark." Tech contuined.

"Okay so the kids?"

"Test subjects." He responded, "farm animals, future death troopers fueled by anger and loss, much more. Hunter, They weren't a family, those people they called there parents? Used them."

"Can we save any of them? Y/n? The older kids? The young ones? Anyone?" Hunter questioned.

"This here is a list of kids of Y/n's family," Tech spoke, plugging into the panel infront of him as the hologram formed, "red are dead, there eay of leaving is by there name. Jay here died of rejection of food, he starved to death. Siora drowned herself in the shower room-"

"Thats enough Tech. Who's alive." Hunter demanded.

"Y/n here is still alive, but that is all." Tech responded opening the file, "but has a number of unstablizing test ran on him, it shows here his diet was starting to change from normal foods to sential flesh, but before they could change him fully he escaped."

"How."

"Unknown."

Hunter was silent, for a moment as Tech closed the file, going through the others, "This also contains other information, such as helpful codes the imperals are now using, current inflation in imperal troopers, comn chatter and resources-"

"Don't let Echo see this." Hunter spoke.

"Hunter, I. I don't think this is a good idea." Tech told him, "You'e seen what he'll go through already to see him again. Hunter that was a sith he went up on, a Pyke leader."

"He doesn't need another thing to have a mental break down on. What happens if we find Y/n? Dead in a ditch-." Hunter argued, "if we can't fix him- we can't even help Crosshair None the less ourselves!"

"Hunter, he deserves to know." Tech defended, "let's be real here Hunter, we've nevee been there for him, we saved him from one hell to put into another, we can't help him because we don't understand him."

Hunter was silent, he knew Tech was right, "You're right." Hunter told him.

Tech pulled the disk from the panel looking back at Hunter, "Hunter I know this is hard. But this is his family. And I wish for a time in my life, I was wrong."

Hunter stayed silent walking out the cockpit, and down the small hallways, Omega trying to cheer Echo up with Lula and Wrecker with a supportive smile.

"Echo."

Echo looked back, "Tech wants to uh...show you something."

Echo got up without a word walking into the cockpit.

"Is he gonna be okay?" Omega questioned looking up at Hunter.

"Sure he will!" Wrecker tried to stay postive looking back at Hunter who kept his gaze down.

"Not this time Omega." Hunter told her, as she leaned in for a hug, he patting her head as she hug his stomach.

Tech walked out the cockpit, the doors closing behind him, "Echo wishes to take first watch while we rest," Tech informed.

"Where do we go next from here?" Omega spoke looking up at Hunter.

"We'll keep working jobs for Cid, seeing what we can do." Hunter responded, "Tech when Echo is done with that disk, see if anything on there has Crosshair on it."

"I have alredy copied the disk, I will look through it more on my watch after Echo's." Tech responded.

Hunter nodded

"hey kid." Wrecker spoke up, "lets go play a game together."

Omega nodded as Wrecker picked up Omega the two walking away to her room, Hunter mentally thanking Wrecker.

"How'd he react." Hunter responded.

"He hasn't." Tech responded, "I left it plugged in. He has the option. I just don't know if he's used it."

It was true, Echo had the option, the wanting, but he sat in his chair, staring at the disk sitting in the panel.

This was it.

This was the ticket, he could know, move on, grt some type of closure either Y/n was dead or alive. Even if Y/n was dead or alive he let Y/n's biggest secret slip.

'Just...I don't like people to pity his name.' Y/n told Echo, the two standing in all black together and umbrella over head as they walked the cemetery, 'he fought hard, that's all that matters, and there's no reason you should pity someone for when you loose,'

Echo nodded at him, 'I won't tell anybody, I understand to a degree, but if you need to talk, I want to listen,'

Y/n nodded, 'Thanks again for comin along Echo, not the best way to meet my baby brother,''

'I was glad to meet him, either way,'

Echo rubbed the back of his neck, finger's scratching at his nape. Standing up and walking over his hand hovered over the disk, should he pull it out? Should he press that small white button to let every fear he's had consume him?

He pulled the disk out, this was the right choice. Whatever he needed to know. He'd learn from y/n when he'd see him. Rubbing over the disk he slid it in his belts pouch and sat in the piolts seat looking out into the blue swirls. He was doing it again.

Sitting in silence, watching nothing new pass him by. Y/n was alive, if the others believed it or not was there choice, it was there opinion, he knew what he was saying was a fact, and he didn't need no disk to tell him so.

But the question still remained, Why was Y/n involved in crime syndicates and with Sith?"

The male turned himself around shoulder hair length, strings of white in his hair; stress induced.

"It's done." Lom Pyke spoke, "The kids are out, where is the spice."

"It's on the ship don't you worry." He spoke.

"You've returned the favor after I've said you returned the favor."

"Then we've returned the favor." Lom Pyke argued.

"I did everything you asked!" Lom Pyke argued, "I've stuck my neck out for you more than you can imagine you cannablistic bitch!-"

The pyke leader was cut off, lifted into the air as he gripped at his neck, and brought forward quickly, choking on the lack of air.

"Do you know who I am?" The man questioned quietly.

"L-let-" the pyke tried to speak stratching at his neck for breath, "let me g-go!"

"Oh...you don't?" The man questioned, "I was afraid once...not to long ago, afraid as you are now..."

The sound of choking made him pause adding slight pressure, "p-please!"

"I am no longer afraid...I am..." the man thought, any more and the pyke leader would die, "Well, funny thing is, I don't even know who I am anymore...but I do know, that, you, owe me much more than you think."

The man was dropped to the floor, attempting to catch air, "Perhaps, you wish, once to see who I was, to see how I became this thing you call a cannablistic bitch!"

"Please! No-" He defended, raising his head to look up in plead, "Not again! Not that place!"

A hand was placed on his head, as the Sith lord walked in. Within a matter of seconds the Pyke fell limp, the man pushing him over as he fell and rolled down the small stells of the elevated ledge.

"You're here for a reason Maul?"

"I am indeed, that clone, you told to meet us on Zut, there were clones."

"Entertain me Maul." He spoke, walking down the small steps, the hells of his boots clicking as he made it down the steps.

"Seems you're little buddy Captain dipshit isnt the only clone that's defected. That little Ray shit of your's hacked the imperal files." Maul spoke, his tone as usual, dark, broody, annoying to the mans ears, "Clone force 99, may just be on our side."

The man snatched the datapad from him, "and they have a child with them. How wonderful."

"Status' as of current."

"Like I said that dipshit of yours sursingly has his corners covered. Ray's tracking them as we speak." Maul told.

The man looked through the photo's there he was in all his glory, sure angry but just as remembered.

"Lets hope an ex sith lord, a fucked up group of clones, a cannablistic bitch kill, and some kids can help kill your old ass wrinkly master." The man spoke Maul snatching the data pad back and making his leave.

"Oh. And one know's who you are." Maul responded standing in the door way, "Before I gave them anything, one knew Rosyln is Y/n,"

[iluvthingsfree99]

bräñdÿ mēłvïłłē methods!!

HIGHLY RECOMMENDED FOR TEENS! i haven’t seen anyone do this yet so i wanted to share the methods that work for me @ basically any bräñdÿ store !! also i have done all of these with at least one or two of my lifter friends and it has worked so far (knock on wood). 

let’s start off with the precautions to take beforehand:

i HIGHLY recommend having a friend when going into brandy. the stores that are not located on a street or something are generally much smaller (and more difficult to lift from), compared to those in a plaza or mall. the ones in the PLAZAS or MALLS are the best options to go to especially during the pandemic. what i personally like doing a day before lifting is googling the store that you’re going to visit on yelp or any other website that can show the store’s exterior and interior. i always do this to get a realistic idea of the store’s layout based on where the register is in the pictures. don’t forget to go on their website and scout some clothing you might like! though, there is no option to check what is inside the store and isnt, it’s good to have a general idea of what you want in terms of basics, outerwear, bottoms, etc etc. 

me and my friends also usually wear very basic bräñdÿ girl clothing like mom jeans, a cropped long sleeve top, oversized sweater, and converse. since these bräñdÿ’s are located in wealthier areas, i try to look a bit more upperclass so they wouldn’t expect anything. we bring dark-colored tote bags (thank god for this trend) or one of us brings a kanken since mostly teenage girls are in/work there and we dont look suspicious. we also save large shopping bags from common clothing stores such as uniqlo, urban outfitters, zara, etc. and hold one bag each with a sweater or two inside (depending on the size) to make it appear as if we’ve bought a lot of clothing and that we have money to spend inside of the store (jokes on them, we never do AHAHAHA). kankens are very very useful since theyre small and no one really expects anyone to steal with it but trust me, it can hold A LOT.

next, what we’re usually all worried about - TAGS:

don’t worry about them in this store! there is NO security tags on any of the brandy melville clothing. (most likely because they are placed in more wealthier areas/malls)  usually, they are just casually hung up by a wire wrapped in fabric or folded and placed on benches. i live in the US and i have never seen any kind of security tag ranging from the pencil kind to the more rounded ones. 

now, who to watch out for:

CONFIDENCE IS KEY! don’t be nervous love! it’s usually a bunch of scrawny girls that work there anyways and from what i’ve seen, they do not have an LP and they very rarely have security guards. an LP is a higher up representative from the company that comes in to watch the tapes but they very rarely come by. the only thing to be aware of is the WORKERS. they are often dressed in regular plain clothing and blend in with other customers around you. when you walk in, it is only easy to distinguish the people working the register. i say to spend 5 minutes, browsing and picking up/putting back items to get a feel for the place and to see who are workers and who’s not. often, they go around to fix and fold varying items or they’re restocking different areas. customers and workers can be easily confused so i recommend staying on your toes and being self-aware. this is where a lookout is most useful and why i highly suggest bringing a friend just to keep an eye on anyone that may be passing by.

and for the BEST part - how to actually lift:

due to the size of the store, me and my friends have distinguished a language of common things to say in code. for instance, i might say, “can you reach that tank top for me?” which basically translates to: “i’m going to put this in my bag, keep a lookout.” we always, always, ALWAYS make sure to go into a blindspot because it is so hard to find the cameras unless they are placed directly on the wall (honestly, thank god for the pandemic because these masks are SUCH lifesavers since they cover your face). anyways, since the tops are flimsy it is *very easy to stuff it in your regular lifting bag. if it is your first time, i reccomend getting any and all tops. i usually just put some in my extra shopping bag quickly and pile up on them. i also carry my kanken with only one arm and leave the zipper a bit open for my friends to easily slip in anything they want inside. i am about 5′4 and both of my friends are 5′6 - 5′7 so usually one person stands in front of me and one is behind me so then the person in front can reach for anything i might like, take it off the hanger and pass it to my friend behind me to place in my bag. it can also work with two people where the person holding the kanken passes each top to their friend behind them. but for the 3 people, i hope this poorly drawn diagram explains it a bit better LMFAOOO

for sweaters, since they are thicker, i mostly use a large zara shopping bag and place it under an actual zara puffer i got previously (but honestly any sweater from any store would work as a cover for it too, i’m just a very paranoid person and scared they might check my bag LMAO). moving the clothes around would be loud but they always play music in the store and those working are always doing something else. last but not least, for pants, this is when i like to use my kanken since they are larger than both a sweater and a tank it’s riskier. i usually  hold them up to my waist, see if they might fit, and then i pretend to set it down when really i’m folding it to make it smaller. after, it is folded or rolled up very tightly, my friend becomes a lookout and i open the zipper to my kanken “looking for my wallet” and then i just stuff it in really quickly. before exiting the store, make sure you have no sleeves stinking out of ANY of your bags because there is almost always someone waiting at the door counting those coming in and out because of covid. remember to act CASUAL! if you act nervous, it will most definitely show to the workers. me and my friends are usually in there for about 15 - 30 minutes which is kind of a long time so one of us actually buys something cheap and simple as an explanation while the others leave and wait somewhere else. 

and i think that is it AHAHA. if you have any questions or if i missed anything, be sure to pm me, i am more than happy to help !! remember: act casual! dont conceal on camera / BLINDSPOTS ARE YOUR BESTFRIEND! trust your gut and dont get greedy with items! i know everything in there is cute but it’s always good to not overdo it for the sake of both yourself and your safety! 

here’s something for all the new babylifters too:

the paranoia gets better over time! use all the information on liftblr at your disposal and learn from experience and new knowledge! remember that whatever corporation you are lifting from, it is from a company that rakes in millions upon millions of dollars exploiting workers for a shirt that only takes 6 cents to make but is being sold for $26. the toxic capitalist system is justification enough and i promise that the workers and the company itself are BARELY affected by lifting. taking $200 worth of clothes or even $16, it is merely pocket change to these corporations. so, always stay safe and good luck loves !!!

[angelthebedsheet]

hi! can i request a hxh headcannon with kurapika maybe like what it's like being a relationship with him? sorry if you can't do this or i requested this the wrong way-

- anon

a/n: it’s alright anon! i’ll try my best to write about the loml and the bad bitch himself kurapika! love hims i may have went CRAZY for this. also i write on my phone so sorry if this is so long!

lets get it!

How yall started dating

okay so yall first met at the hunter exams elevator

the main four first walked in there and were surprised to see another person there

and gon being his friendly self started to chat it up with you

“hi im gon!!”

“hi gon. i’m y/n.”

kurapika there respectfully looking at you

like you’re attractive.

lookin at how those elevator lights shine on your beautiful melaninated skin

whew baby he went 😳 inside but greeted you

“im kurapika”

“well hello kurapika”

and that was the BEGINNING

timeskip up in this bitch rq

the arcs are pretty hazy to me so like.... lets say yall were feeling e/o during the york new city arc

yall both were trying to become bounty hunters and were alr pretty close to e/o

you suggested working with him and he liked that idea

yall alr fought really well tgt and he actually liked having you around him

so you both became neon’s bodyguards

yall were slowly becoming closer to each other each day yall worked together

like lingering touches, yearnful gazes

allat cute mushy shit

kurapika is one touch starved and closed off bitch so he’s struggling here

you on the other hand you KNOW you want kurapika like who wouldn’t want him???

he’s a whole package in that tuxedo 🥵🥵

n e ways

soon neon notices this shit and it goes downhill

this lil shit starts PURPOSELY locking yall in rooms together

like baby no we are supposed to protect you what are you doing???

“im not letting you out till you two kiss!!”

“i beg your pardon?” - kurapika

“neon huh???” - you

kurapika is internally like what the fuck what the fuck what the fuck i lwk wanna kiss em but.... feelings.

you can see the internal STRUGGLE thats going on in kura’s eyes

you just say fuck it and pray the gods and any other spiritual holy beings are on your side and kiss him

kurapika’s stomach said 🦋🦋🦋🦋 when you cupped his face

like your lips are SOFT

(no cuz like some of yall rlly be making y/n have crusty ass lips like um no baby i wear lip gloss and chapstick religiously you aint gon catch me w/ brittle ass lips)

and you cant tell me kurapika doesnt wear chapstick

and he’s like ✋🏽😳 hol up this kinda.... this kinda hits why didnt i do this earlier?

(bc you’re a gated ass bitch thats why honey)

my mans just has to kiss back

he kinda just gently holds your wrists and kisses back

now you’re deceased bc damn boy where you learned this???

no cap you kinda felt your knees buckle and he noticed that but yall not gon talk about that

and you two reluctantly pull away bc hello yall still on the job and literally are bodyguards

“the door wasnt even locked.”

“you cheeky lil shi—

cue you chasing neon while she runs away giggling

kurapika can only gently touch his lips and smile with a red face

In the Relationship

now yall are disgustingly cute in private

kurapika is definitely touch starved and he always needs to be touching you in some way

he always looks out for you too

he’ll definitely press tons of kisses to your face or the back of your neck

calls you a bunch of cheesy nicknames

darling, my love, my sun, sweetheart, beloved, honey, babylove (the stanely uris thats played by wyatt oleff makes me lose my sHIT)

my boy loves your hair so much

like the texture? the volume?

he’s all for it

he would probably ask canary about wash day bc she’s black herself

would 100% help you with wash day

want him to detangle your hair? hand him that rat toothed comb he’s on it

wash your hair? let him roll up his sleeves he’s on it

oil massages? pass them oil bottles baby he’s putting you to sleep

like you will be KNOCKED as he washes your hair or oils it bc he’s that skilled

i think he would struggle braiding your hair but after you show him?

this man is taking over and braiding your hair neater than you

like excuse me where did you learn this??

parting god.

them parts are crispy and straighter than a mf

literally doesn’t comb your hair like ya mama do w/ all that tugging and shit

he’ll just gently move your head along or softly apologize whenever he accidentally tugs on your hair and presses a kiss to your scalp

taking. baths. together.

my boy CRAVES that intimacy

no sexual shit

after a long day of work he just LOVES to take a nice bubble bath with you

either you leaning against his chest or you on the opposite end of the bath

he can always unwind around you and let go of that stoic facade he puts on

i would say he’s a lil goofy in private? like he’ll scoop up the bubbles and blow them in your face

if you want jokes you gotta give em

baby had to grow up quicker so he’s more mature for his age

i’d say if you want them giggles out? hold his waist and blow the back of his neck

the way he JERKS from that then starts laughing

heart eyes up in that bitch

his laugh is so 🥺🥺🥺🥰🥰

“darling!” “that was so FUCKING CUTE KURA WTFFF”

another way? blow kisses in his neck

he will giggle like a lil kid

god i love him

when you go to sleep he’s always big spoon

doesn’t matter if you’re taller than him

big. spoon. kurapika.

the only times you can hold him is when he has a breakdown and his scarlet eyes are activated

nightmares haunt him alot and he just needs to hear your heartbeat to know you’re still here

he needs to feel your warmth and you whispering that you’re here

other than those moments you better be fine with him holding you

i would say he doesn’t move alot in his sleep other than the small twitches

but for some reason his grip is strong as FUCK

like you aint getting out of his arms at ALL

if you gotta pee hold it

nah im kidding

just wake him up he’s not a deep sleeper but he isnt a light one either

if he were to wake up in the middle of the night he’d definitely fix your bonnet or durag if it fell off

morning kissies!

one way he loves waking up is kisses all over his face

especially kissing on his eyelids

it makes him wake up with a big ol smile

“morning beloved.”

WHEWWWWWW THE RASP

ahem anyways

“morning pikapika.”

he used to hate that nickname

now? baby LOVES it bc it’s just for him

the lohl giving him a nickname just for him makes butterflies in his stomach go crazy

he can practically feel the love oozing from your eyes

the way he wakes you up?

if he’s feeling a lil goofy or silly he’ll lay ontop of you and blow kisses into your neck

if he’s still tired he’ll cup your face and gently call your name

yall cook together

if you cant cook he will respectfully say take your goofy ass out of the kitchen

if you can? show him how to season your food correctly. rmb how he made that pig look pretty asf but merchi basically said it taste like shit?

not on your watch

he’ll take mental notes as you teach him the ways of goya and sazon

sometimes he’ll just gently take over

not bc he thinks you cant do it right but bc he likes to provide for others

you just gotta lightly slap his hands away like bby i got this its okay

and he’ll understand

kisses with him are very soft but passionate?

like he isnt gonna eat your lips but he will hold you close and make sure you know how much he loves you

he’ll definitely twirl your curls around his finger

you of course gave him your permission when you started dating

he will always have one arm around your waist and one hand behind your neck

doesnt matter if you’re taller

he will 100% get on his tiptoes and do it

or make you sit down

he doesnt CARE if he has to step on a stepladder he’ll do it

he said run me my kisses NEOW

i would definitely say he’s a passionate lover and would throw hands with ANYONE if they make any snarky comments about your skin

“my s/o’s skin is beautiful mind your business and take yourself somewhere else before i do it for you”

😳

🕶🤏🏾

sir.....

you would throw hands for him too

anyone says anything about him being a girl?

its over

there was a time where someone called him a girl who was confused and you went off and got into a fight

you won by a landside

kurapika was like 😟😦😳🥺

bc you really fought for his honor

but he had to pull you away before you damn near put this person in the hospital

“honey thank you but it was okay. it didnt bother me.”

“no but it bothered me! nobody can just talk about someone i love like that.”

he went 🥺🥺🥺

he definitely kissed the FUCK outta you when yall got home

yall hands were rated e for everyone!

a ride or die couple

yall are in love love

maybe he’s looking for a ring and kurta wedding earrings

[moonlightchn]

~WHOLESOME WEDNESDAY~

Not to be a soft motherfucker but I've been wanting to do this again for a week now so I guessed I would try my best to fit as many of my thoughts here as I can without being annoying or tumblr fucking up plz bear with me heh but we know none of those are actually possible anyway so THERES THAT also this is fucking long wow ANYWAY

WARNING WORD VOMIT sjsjsjsj I dont even know what i wrote I'm sorry but I'm tagging yall anyway

Some of you I speak to on a daily basis, yknow? Like,, as admin. And its fucking insane because like- I don't know but like isn't it insane? sjajsjsj How fast some people come to grow in your heart and get under your skin and become so important for you. I think it's crazy. That in four months or so I've made more friends in here that in my whole life and I've learned so much about life and myself and I've gotten marked and some of you imprinted on my mind and heart forever. And like HELL I wasn't here when most big dramas happened but I was here for two very big ones and like??? idk it feels like all of us have been through shared crises and somehow grown closer sjajskwjs idk I'm weird and im sensitive today and I just feel like wow what would I be doing without all of you right now? probably studying. or scrolling Twitter in which I never spoke to anyone. or watching Instagram stories and getting sad over how all my ex class partners are still in contact and hang out and keep strong relationships while I just sit here. like, I know we all say this place sucks and we hate it and its toxic and don't get me wrong of course some people is fucking shitty and they take a toll on a lot of others but that like... it also happens in real life yknow?? but like in real life how many people do you think would actually idk sit with you through a panic attack or stay up with you till 8am or wake up in the middle of the night or rave with you or hype you up or have meme wars or send you daily jokes or just randomly tell you how much you mean to them or make posts asking where you are when you disappear or been gone for too long or make people that doesnt know you send you birthday wishes? like I'm not saying it doesnt happen but isnt it wonderful that it happens HERE with US where maybe out of 10 people only 2 know each other in real life? Isnt it wonderful that we're from all around the world? that you half of the time dont realize someone isnt from English speaking places because they're too good or even when they're not that good no one judges you because this is such an inclusive and wonderful place for people of all races and colors and sexualities and nationalities and body types and hair colors?

idk I'm just RAMBLING but like I wanted to let everyone know that even if we dont speak, even if we NEVER spoke, even if we're only on each others tag lists, or even if I was and you took me off or I took you off or if you deleted or if you have 817383 bots and you speak to me in all of them or only one or whatever PLEASE just know that I love you so much and I appreciate you and you're awesome and if you made some mistakes know that you CAN fix them you CAN learn and be better you CAN grow.

I believe that everyone is capable of learning and changing and everyone deserves a second chance as long as they genuinely show the intention of changing and bettering themselves. I believe that we're capable of forgiving and maintaining healthy relationships without hard feelings. I believe we all have goodness. I believe we all are small universes and we have stars in our eyes and supernovas in our brains and a million things to discover and I believe its funnier to be together than alone and I'm rambling again but like idk just yesterday I was sending someone a message telling them how maybe I'm fucking delusional and naive because who the fuck goes out on their daily saying "be skeptical. dont trust too much. always pay attention" but then after two days of talking with someone they're fucking platonically whipped and would sell their soul as long as they can see those around them happy? trick question I know many of you do too which WORRIES ME PLZ DONT PUT YOUR HEARTS ON THE LINE SO EASILY I drifted I forgot what I was saying oh welp

Anyway for some of you i have so much to say I could write endless paragraphs about you about admins and characters and life and wow I do speak a lot to admins sometimes I speak more to admins as admin that the characters and for some others I can only say a few things or wish you to have a good day some of you I only ever spoke to your character or we talked too little or never at all wow I say that a lot but like one thing yall have in common is that I love you so much even if you don't know me or dont care alright I dont care if you don't care I LOVE YOU and you can FIGHT ME if you dont wanna accept it smh I just want you to know that this place so many of you have been feeling is crumbling down or hurting them or isnt the same anymore is MY safe place too is a place where I feel comfortable and secure and I know, well decide to believe, that you guys would never do willingly anything to hurt another and yknow sometimes I just sit in bed and look at my account and I'm like wow I suck I should delete but then I'm like I could never do that to you I really couldn't because I've been told so many times I'm peoples safe place too and I would never want to take that away from you yknow

I mean I'm not gonna say we shouldn't pay attention to the bad things that happen because this is somehow our home and it's on us to protect it but I think that we shouldnt focus so much on it. because theres still so many good things that we overlook when we think of the bad or when we let things get to us or when we decide to act out of impulse and not think through stuff yknow

ANYWAAY what I'm trying to say is that I love you all so so so so so much and this is my safe place because you're here for me when I need it and I would never give you guys up for anything and like i have so many people for whom i stay daily and try my best and I hope that someday when you need a reason i can be that for you too because I've said this in private but I want everyone to know that this is my corner too and I will always fight for it and protect it so like we can all fight for it together whenever things get rough or you can leave me alone and maybe I'm being super dramatic and putting a lot of weight on this but I started overthinking like halfway and in just tthink that I want to keep yall close to me and my heart forever ok so stay safe and healthy and happy yeah fight for your happiness fight for what you deserve fight for what you want and don't let anyone ANYONE EVER take away from you your joy and your spark and your will to be yourself ok bye

[zhuhongs]

Since rewatching the guardian drama after reading the novel has made me mad about how bad and good both of them are I am Obligated to write out a list of what I think the perfect merger btw both versions of canon are. This will be in list format otherwise I’ll end up writing like 6k words again. 

TLDR: the genre stays as supernatural from the novel and not Sci fi, bc that was rlly not fleshed out well. Shen Wei is a ghost king, and all the dixingren are ghosts or demons like originally intended. The ghost race naturally exists and wasn't born from kunluns shoulder fire or anything. They just exist separate from humans. Not all ghosts are former humans, some people are just born as ghosts, like Shen Wei. Zhao Yunlan has the guardian whip and all the cool stuff that comes with the Guardian order.  Overall, i’d keep the novel’s plot and relationship progression and ending without the backstory. Instead the backstory is a merger of both canons. From the drama I’d keep the characterization and themes as well as like half the extra cases and omit the other half. 

I’ll be elaborating much further on my ideal backstory and other stuff under the cut bc the rest is 1.5k and I don’t wanna clog the dash 

Okay SO In my ideal backstory there are two timelines just like the drama but the mythology of the book. The god Kunlun is actually zyl that went back in time and became a god. But the one that went back isn’t the current Zhao Yunlan. There has to be an original timeline where the god Kunlun never existed. Thus the great seal nor the separation of the three realms don’t exist either. Zhao Yunlan must go back in time to become a god, meet Shen Wei in the past, and create the current timeline where the separation exists but isn’t perfect. The current timeline is the one that the majority of the series takes place in.

In the original timeline, Zhao Yunlan is just some dude living in a world where ghosts, fairies, and all other beings just live in a giant free for all and it's kinda just a mess. 

Like there’s government in modern context and all and all races live with each other but there's constant tension. ZYL works at some equivalent of the SID (same staff and side characters, but novel vers. Lin Jing is a monk, CSZ a zombie, etc) to protect people and all that and their job is rather hard. One day encounters the thousands year old ghost king Wei (who isnt shen wei yet bc zyl gave him that name in the future) who works alone as like a rouge cultivator of sorts. He lives on the surface undercover as a professor still bc he’s trying to not catch Yezun’s attention but does all the stuff he normally does as Heipaoshi. The two ally together for a case and bc they both have the same goals of getting all races to live in peace. At current, there are forces working together to decimate the human race, all lead by Yezun

As they work together they become closer and all that. Shen Wei tells him about how he was unable to prevent the great war 5 thousand years ago and neither could the gods so  he’s spent the past 5 thousand years trying to make up for it. As they search for ways to stop Yezun, they gather the 4 hallows and learn how to use them to manipulate time so ZYL can go into the past and stop the great war and separate the three realms (living, dead, ghost).  Shen Wei wants to go back with him but he can’t because he was alive all those years ago so if he goes back it will create a paradox. ZYL promises he’ll find Shen Wei in the past and create a timeline where they could be together in peace (that is the current timeline)

When goes back he becomes the god kunlun because there needed to be a new god born at the time to prevent the war.  Also this time traveller looked promising to Nuwa, Fuxi, and Shennong. And I know in the guardian universe gods are usually born and ppl don’t become gods. EXCEPT this can happen when a god passes on smth from their body onto them bc that did happen in the novel with Kunlun making shen wei a demigod. And since fu you and ma gui are supposed to be gods Nu Wa and Fuxi I think that when they die, they should make ZYL a god and that's how this stuff happens.

So like ZYL explains to the gods the time he came from and how he wants to save everything and they make him a god and he works to save everything just like he did in the drama but this time with the novel plotline. During this time he meets young Shen Wei (he’s still like a hundred or so years old) and they get close and all the stuff from the backstory happens. He gives him his name, all that good stuff. The entire time doesn’t let him know that he’s from the future or that his real name is ZYL. He just poses as kunlun. 

The two of them alongside the other gods (who still die at the times they do in the novel) work together to end the war and establish the great seal and set up the cycle of reincarnation, per the current timeline. Although the seal and cycle of reincarnation aren’t perfect. Gods can’t reincarnate, and ghosts still don’t have souls. And just like the novel, doing all of this kills ZYL bc it takes a lot of energy to create the seal even though it isn’t perfect.

Shen Wei of course doesn’t want ZYL to die and zyl says it's alright because he fixed the timeline so there must One day they will meet again and ZYL reveals the truth about the timeline to shen wei before he dies. This becomes the promise that Shen Wei mentions to meet again. Before he dies, ZYL gives him the shoulder fire as a memento ( i still like the candy wrapper necklace deal but i’ll take this too. Maybe both.. The pendant is still just rlly cool.. Gay ppl)

Shen Wei knows gods can’t enter the cycle of reincarnation and still makes the deal with Shennong to strip Kunlun of his godhood and let him reincarnate. This sets us into the novel timeline where isn’t allowed to meet any of zyl’s reincarnations before he becomes zyl otherwise he will die and also fuck up the timeline. The same 5 thousand years of pining still ensue bc Gay Ppl and i love making Shen Wei suffer but he doesn’t have the shrine room thing bc i think thats weird and yea.. Bad. 

In the meantime Shen Wei does a lot of things mostly just protecting the great seal and working for Hell to keep the peace but still does other stuff. He still watches out for ZYL’s reincarnations but doesn’t do much besides make sure they don’t die a premature death. They meet again finally at the beginning of the series and the timeline resumes like canon. And that's my master plan that merges both drama logic and novel logic while making a much better timeline. (I hope that makes some sense)

Da Qing is still Kunlun’s pet cat and important. Novel backstory applies to him. And I already mentioned him kinda but as for Yezun (Gui Mian in the novel) his deal is similar as in the drama but just a ghost. And he is a big player in the great war, he thought Shen Wei abandoned him as a kid but they were just separated. Shen Wei doesn’t know it's him till the end of the war and couldn’t stop him in the OG timeline and vows to bring him to justice and make amends. Shen Wei continuously tries to explain things to him but he just won’t listen and is imprisoned in hell bc yk… war criminal stuff and yeah he’s the main antagonist trying to break the great seal bc he’s still made about the past. Idk. Yezun wasn’t well written in the novel OR the drama so like… honestly he just needs to be completely rewritten and I don’t care enough about that. He can just be a weak villain idk

the drama characterization stays the same for everyone else bc found family go brr. However for Lao Chu i… hmm… i think he should still be a zombie but the reason he killed someone should be related to his brother. I like that addition and then shen wei realized his sentence was unjust and exempted him. i like that storyline merger. bc the brother thing and him admiring Heipaoshi was drama only. in the novel lao chu just murdered some kid for a rlly whatever reason.

uhhh in terms of the cases… id make adjustments to most of them. i think the li qian case should be like the drama bc the novel just had her as a murderer and it was boring. 

For the mountain river awl one was fine… novel version was funnier and more interesting action wise tbh… rip zyl and his exorbitant flirting. uhhh the whole reveal that shen wei was the soul reaper thing was kinda… ehh in the novel but i did love the comedy of afterwards Shen Wei pretending he went into cardiac arrest when he actually just… has no pulse bc he's a ghost. 

ID KEEP THE WORTH IT SCENE AND RAIN SCENE… THOSE FUCK SO HARD… I love the drama for adding those every damn day. the novel version of zyl losing his sight sucked and was sooo boring.  Keep the drama version on that.

also id keep dr. cheng. i'm very pro dr. cheng and her friendship with shen wei it adds so much to his character imo. keep the fruit seller man and his wife for the merit brush..omg it adds SO MUCH the way the drama did it.. like the drams build up with the novels pace of that arc.. mwah. it felt like it dragged a bit in the drama but if it went faster and without the hospital ep and with sha ya (sorry sha ya) that would've been so good. tho keep novel version of da qings memory loss and lao li. that was rlly impactful.

id say keep some of the cases like the mirror one, the eyes doctor one, etc. just to like.. yk have more to fill in general.. novel pacing but drama characterization without the bs that wasn't fully realized. and novel ending ofc. And that’s it!!

I hope most of this makes some amount of sense  but it probably doesn’t. In my head it all tracks but like ik most of u don’t know anything about the novel so this sounds like gibberish. Also I know this would literally never happen but this is MY ideal merger of the two canons that I feel compelled to expand on for some reason. Anyways, as io said,, we need to rebuild guardian. Like literally let me and the mutuals write Guardian and it will be 500 times better.

[topsytervy]

Rafe with an Asexual Reader

Because it’s Ace Awareness Week (hello, by the way, I’m not dead), I decided to do a kind of canon Rafe (minus the murder) little thing with an Asexual reader.

Word Count: that’s a good question

Warnings: like one mention of cocaine, swearing, talks about sex, mentions an ex trying to out the ace reader (WHICH ISNT COOL! DONT EVER OUT SOMEONE! IT’S THEIR DECISION OF WHEN AND WHO TO COME OUT TO!), i think thats it

Everyone knows Rafe as the kook prince

has issues with his dad, has a coke addiction 

Has definitely had some adventures in the bedroom if you're picking up what I'm putting down (lets face it, there’s a good chance Rafe is kinky)

Has had his fair share of casual hookups

And let’s be honest, Rafe’s attractive

I mean, have you seen his eyes?

And while many girls saw him at a party and thought 'cant wait to get him out of those khakis'

You thought about how amazing his hugs probably were because, holy shit, his arms

No one even thought Rafe knew what asexuality was (and they were right)

It started when you accidentally bumped into him at a kegger at the boneyard, causing him to spill his beer

"Oh shit, Rafe! I'm so sorry! It's all over your shirt!"

 Rafe was pissed but when you apologized and genuinely looked upset about the damage you had done, he was a bit less pissed

After all, you were trying to fix your mistake and he was touched by that fact, considering your friend group despised him

You told him you had a Tide to go stick in your backpack that was over by Kie at the campfire and he followed you

You grabbed your backpack from Kie, not wanting JJ to start shit with the kook and you and Rafe walked away from the noise of the kegger.

Rafe noticed the pins on your backpack and was interested by them, taking in each one of them as you dug through your bag

You had some pins of cartoons like Courage the Cowardly Dog, Scooby Doo, PowerPuff Girls, The Simpsons, South Park, etc. But also some random ass pins JJ pocketed from stores that he thought you’d like

But there was one pin that stood out from the rest.

A pin that was black, grey, white and purple striped

"What's that one?" He asked, pointing at it.

"Oh...uh...its the asexual flag…"

You were out but you weren’t out, if you know what I mean

The only people you came out to were JJ, John B, Pope, Kie, your parents, your ex, and Sarah after she joined the group but that's a whole different story

Your ex threatened to tell everyone on the Island after you broke up with them but after a quite successful threat from John B, Pope, JJ, and Kiara that ended with Pope (or Kie if your ex is a girl) decking them, they kept it quiet

Rafe raised an eyebrow to the new term presented to him 

"If you don't mind me asking, could you explain what that means?"

"Uhh...its the flag for asexuality…"

"I get the flag part. Just the asexual part is what I need explained to me."

You explained it to him as best as you could, but in the end you just said “I don’t desire the sexual parts of a relationship”

Rafe leaned back, completely intrigued by the fact that you had no sexual attraction 

"So asexuals just...dont really do sex."

"I mean...there's a lot more to it. There’s an entire ace spectrum and it’s a lot to break down.”

"Okay. Break it down for me."

You guys talked about the ace spectrum for 2 and a half hours before noticing that the party was dying down

You two stood up, deciding that both of you needed to find your friends before they found you and thought that Rafe assaulted you or something

"I kind of like the idea of that." "Of what?" "Being with someone who just doesn't really care about the sex part of the relationship but the other aspects of it." 

When Rafe got home that night, he watched Anthony Padilla interview asexuals and googled it as if he had an essay due the next day

He knew he wasn't ace but he found it interesting to learn about, maybe it was the thought that someone could love and care about him and not just want him for sex

When Sarah got up at 2 am for a glass of water, she saw him still up and on his phone

"Texting a booty call?" "No." "Telling a girl that last night was fun and all but if anything, you want to keep it casual?" "No, Sarah."

She walked in to look at what he was doing, only to see that he was reading an asexual article

"Either you've discovered something about yourself, which I find kind of hard to believe no offense, or you met Y/N." "I did, in fact, meet Y/N." 

He slowly started making his way up the ladder from acquaintance to friend and eventually, months later, he asked you out on a little casual at home date

JJ practically launched himself off the couch the first time Rafe walked into the chateau behind you

You quickly managed to somehow stop the blonde from getting close enough to throw a punch at the older boy

"Why is he here?" JJ asked, practically shooting daggers at the boy with his eyes. "Its fine. We're just here for my charger and then we'll be on our way, J" JJs gaze went from Rafe to you. "I'm sorry. Run that back." You grabbed JJs hand and pulled him into the kitchen as Rafe stood awkwardly in the doorway. "I promise you, he has no bad intentions. He made that clear from the start.." "You don't know his motives, Y/N, and people lie. Especially people like Rafe." JJ glanced at Rafe from where he stood. "JJ please. He's different from what you think." You begged. JJ looked at you and you gave him a little pout and the classic puppy dog eyes. JJ rubbed his hands over his face before holding them up in surrender. "Fine. Fine. But if it goes south, you better text me-" "Pecan Pie. I know. Thank you, JJ." You said before grabbing your charger from the counter and scurrying off.

The date was literally just you two in his living room with you curled up into his side as you guys watched childhood movies together

"Okay, you're up. What's a movie you watched when you were younger?" "The Great Mouse Detective." "Alright."

You two ended up falling asleep at some point during the second Mulan and Sarah came home

She had to cover her mouth with her hand to stop her herself from squealing at the fact that her horny ass brother was getting into a relationship who just didn't have the horniness

She snapped a picture and sent it to John B, who showed the rest of the Pogues and JJ felt himself smile a bit cause you looked so peaceful and content

She also sent it to Rafe 

When he woke up to see that his sister sent him a text he was annoyed at first but opened it nonetheless

He smiled when he saw the picture and immediately saved it to his camera roll

Rafe, reluctantly, woke you up to take you back to the Chateau

As the two of you talked on the porch of John B’s house, discussing details of your next date, the pogues, minus Kie, watched out the window before John B slowly opened it so he could listen

“Really? You three on going to eavesdrop on a whole conversation that doesn’t involve you?” “Kie, don’t act like your surprised by this fact.”

The night ended with Rafe kissing you cheek before getting back into his truck and pulling out of the driveway

You watched him leave as you addressed your audience

“I know you three are at the window. Stop acting like you’re discreet about it. You guys would be the worst fucking spies ever because you opened a window that hasn’t been greased in eternity so it squeaks when you open it and a spy would know better than to do that.”

[littlebabycrybtch]

tbh... we have absolutely FAILED ppl with ea/ting disor.ders so fucking unimaginably bad, especially the visibly underweight ones. and we are still failing them to this day by avoiding valuable education out of discomfort and demonization. its genuinely appalling sometimes, to see just how Dangerously ignorant ppl are about this shit. bros listen 2 me rn. you are not a doctor, and you are Not going cure an ed with your almost laughably ignorant and malicious ‘reverse psychology’ bit where you call someone an ugly skeleton knocking on deaths door whos body needs to be banned from instagram forever, because you’re just ‘so scared theyre gonna die’ or w/e so you can legit pretend they dont exist, holy fucking Shit dude. that shame-and-shun tactic is so unbelievably dangerous. like, if you knew Anything REAL abt these disorders or frankly any mental health issues and cared enough to apply that then you would understand how thats just... pure cruelty. im sorry to be blunt but yeah this isnt a joke, it needs to be said that you are easily going to KILL SOMEONE with that kind of unfiltered uneducated IGNORANCE. it is inexcusably selfish, harmful, and ableist behavior, we have to stop this already.

imo there’s a Lot to be said about the toxicity spiral thats become the pro recovery movement and how much it rejects and speaks over the people its Supposed to support, becoming more about ‘anti symptoms’ than pro anything, but if you are gonna understand Anything new today at least learn this;;; hating yourself at unhealthy is Never ever going to be the key to loving yourself at healthy. being ashamed of yourself FOR being unhealthy, will NOT make you healthier, it’ll make you worse every time. im not tryna be mean but honestly how the actual FUCK do yalls brains work, it is SO wildly damaging to let yourself perpetuate this type of mindset, and then still claim pro recovery or w/e like recovery doesnt have to start at unhealthy??? like itll just happen overnight??? like that’ll help??? like if ppl catch you displaying symptoms of the disorder you LITERALLY HAVE, you arent allowed to talk abt it in any form without intense open negativity towards it and yourself, so ppl know ur definitely totally against it tho and not enabling urself, bc if you dont talk abt ur shame and embarrassment for it that means you arent recovering and need a mob after you??? thats how you think people are gonna get better????

ffs dont try to viciously shame yourself out of bad habits and treat your disorders like taboo, respect and love yourself wholly, the good and the bad, if you want to form better habits!!! ppl NEED to be encouraged to love themselves at unhealthy if they ever want to improve. you are not going to accidentally make them worse by not constantly shaming all their ‘flaws’, they are not MADE of ‘flaws’. by showing support for the mentally ill, you are not fucking supporting their ‘symptoms’, you are a supporting THE FUCKING PERSON EXPERIENCING THEM. and you DESPERATELY NEED TO DO THAT!! there is MORE TO THEM than their symptoms! there are things to COMPLIMENT them on besides their body! its gotten to this point that like. ppl are actually Afraid of just being nice to ppl with eds. they dont even wanna treat them like Humans outside of their disorder, all they see is a disorder. everyone is just SO afraid of ‘enabling’ them by not being vocally against their symptoms that they avoid them like the plague and dont even try to build them up, which is what they fucking need more than anything dude!! 

ppl think refusing to ever let an underweight person feel pretty or love their body where they are at is what they need and will force them to recover, or they think giving them goals like ‘you’ll be so much happier with a bigger body’ and ‘keep going one day you wont look so sick’ is at all different than their own internal dialogue, when the Truth (that people need to fucking know by now!), is that shame with mental health is incredibly dangerous, eds are diverse but theyre most often rooted in starvation as a form of self harm from an unwavering self hatred and feeling of failure or lack of control, one they already have deeply ingrained and will usually feel at Any Size, which is why so many feel unsatisfied and keep going and going till they die. the answer to this problem isnt gonna be inflicting more fucking self hate or pressure. thats gasoline on a fire. you cannot just try and. UNO REVERSE CARD THE ~RULES~ OF THEIR FUCKING MENTAL DISORDER and expect RECOVERY... oh my god dude, please, id laugh out loud if this wasnt so malicious.

listen, if you wanna help, like actually Care about Helping the way you claim the root of your attitude is, you need to make that person feel like they can love themselves, not try to make them ‘realize’ how ‘bad’ they are and how uncomfortable and scared they make you and how Not Allowed their behavior is, bc 1. body dysmorphia is a delusion,,, denial is a common association with addictive/self destructive behaviors,,,, you are going about it wrong if thats the first thing you try to accomplish, and 2. whether you like it or not ‘bad’ is gonna be your first checkpoint! who would be motivated to get better when all you’re doing is giving them an already failing grade and pushing them back??? 

you’re all just... so paralyzed by ignorant fear every time you interact with someone with an ed bc you are so fucking detached from it as a concept, but you wont LEARN how to BEHAVE AROUND THESE PPL! LIKE! and then you claim you act this way ‘because you care'. ok then why do you feel like you dont have to listen or learn??? why dont you see these tactics as needlessly cruel when its explained??? bc oh you cant ‘’’’’trust’’’’ ppl with eds to tell You how to help Them, right??? they’re probably lying, you know better than them ofc. smhhh, every other mental illness community gets to speak for themselves to the ppl without their experiences and therefore the ability to hurt them, sure, but not the sneaky ed people, they created pr.0/a.na/, (the ONLY existing space for encouraging mentally ill ppl in self destructive behaviors, obviously), so they dont know what they need, they have to be Told by Normal people bc their irrational brains are Just Too Broken. (/s)............ like.............?? it is Sooo fuckin prejudiced and disgusting tbh. we gotta do better than this. 

eds are almost completely left out of communities for mental health these days. its seriously so disappointing. if you ACTUALLY ‘care’, then ok you need to swallow your pride and do better, you need to Listen and not let your personal discomforts (genuine triggers excluded!) with their appearance or behaviors get in the way of how humanized and committed your decent treatment of their disorder is. tbr, sometimes you arent just ‘concerned’ about a person, sometimes how you go about your feelings is rooted in your inner urge to validate your own discomforts with them, which means it might end up more about you than about them, which hurts them. i mean for the love of god, these ppl are not ‘irresponsible’ for existing around others with their ~unhealthy bodies~, they are not a walking trigger and cant be treated like one, they arent contagious, they will not benefit mentally from hearing you say you think they should be physically banned from posting selfies or w/e, that isolation WONT prevent eds from ~~~spreading~~~ and will severely harm the person in question, you are not making a heroic decision to try and bully them away to ‘save’ others from ever being around them or save them from being around an “enabling” (supportive recovery/not shameful) community. you are not ‘fixing’ them by making them hate their underweight bodies. you’re LITERALLY just ignorant and prejudiced and ableist, your ideas are actually Very harmful, you are not a savior, you are making it worse, plain and simple. Please just start doing better already, its kind of a life or death situation here