#not all struggles are the same but they are all valid

[coeurify]

“it’s november.”

the words have you jumping, the unsolid, rounded edges of the stool you’re currently standing on wobble with the movement of your foot. a squeak follows, rushing to find your balance— which is fine so by pressing your hand against the wall you were trying to reach the top of.

the hand that’s currently holding a string of multi colored christmas lights, the green trail of side dropping below you, your stool and the wall you had already pinned them to.

“it’s november,” the voice repeats— belonging to your girlfriend ellie, who walks behind you and peers up. the sweater she wears is pushed up to her elbows, pooling the cloth in a way that makes her look a little silly. as silly as the tone of voice she uses as she continues her obvious teasing. “and you’re already putting christmas lights up?”

your lips pout out immediately at the words, huffing as you press your sock clad feet. “november is almost over el. this is an absolutely valid time to put these up.” you wave your hand holding the clump of lights around, much more steady on your little wooden stool you were using for some added height.

“babe, thanksgiving hasn’t even passed,” ellie continues— and you can see her shaking her head even out of the corner of your eye as your head turns back to the wall— jaw clenching as you press up on your toes again to hand the light over the next pin. the small chuckle that the sight of you struggling to reach the spot seems to bring only annoys you more— head snapping to look over your shoulder with a look ellie liked to call your ‘scary eyes.’

“you can’t even— baby you can’t even reach. how did you get all that up?” ellie tries not to laugh but she can’t help it, the bursts of giggles slipping from her lips before she can stop them, green eyes trailing over the soft and cozy living room you two shared. somehow, alone with your little shitty stool.. you had covered at least half of the room while she was napping. “let me help,” she offered, a hand reaching out to steady your leg.

“no!” you complain, kicking your leg out a little to shrug off her hand. it only brings the wood below you to rock some more, which makes ellie grip a little harder. “you’re being judgy. i don’t want your help.” you sound petulant, maybe a little hurt by her amusement that you were doing this now.. alone.

“i am not being judgy,” ellie soothes her hand over your leg as you reach forward and successfully hook the sting of wired lights over the next spot. “you are, and you’re basically the same height as me— you can’t reach shit either.” you continue, the dig at her height a teasing one, paired with an eyebrow raise and fleeting glance back at her.

“ow?” ellie’s free hand clamped over her chest in faux hurt— the ragged cut strands of deep auburn hair shaking with her head. you find yourself watching the movement and fighting away a smile. “i meant by keeping you steady but if you wanna be mean i can totally let you do it all.” ellie pinches your leg over the fuzzy sweatpants you’re wearing. if it was anyone else you might be a little worried she was actually hurt.. but you can hear the humor seeping into her words and drawing out her sentences.

“fine,” the sigh that comes with the tingle word makes it seem like this decision was just absolutely the most difficult one you’ve had to make— the dramatics always evident. “i guess you can help. but only if you quit saying i’m doing it too early.”

honestly, you had planned to finish this little light hanging before she was done with her nap. she worked a long day with joel, you wanted to surprise her. and okay.. maybe you had seen one or two too many videos about the holidays that had given you the itch to decorate something and right then. but clearly the surprise element was lost, and ellie’s sarcastic taunting had replaced it. so now maybe you’re doing it out of spite. who knows, maybe you’ll even put on the santa clause after.

ellie’s fingers raise to her mouth, fake zipping them and nodding quickly. the urge to roll your eyes is one you act on, scoffing at her before you turn again and feel the steady warmth of her hands on both of your legs now, shifting you a little bit further down the wall for the next spot.

your lip falls between your teeth again, toes straining against your feet as you push as high as you can to get the next spot and—

“okay but you can admit most people wait for after thanksgiving right?”

“ellie!”

[tarot-by-e11e]

PAC: "Little Warnings"

(this is strictly for entertainment purposes only)

Unfortunately, this is gonna hurt. So, don't read through this if you're already going through some pretty harsh stuff.

When I felt called to do this PAC, I felt that we needed to be humbled and check ourselves occasionally to see if we were being a bit too arrogant. It's such an odd feeling to be called to do this theme for this specific PAC, but hey, even if not every loving call out may be meant for others, every message is still, in some shape or form, valid. Not all of it may resonate with you, and that is still okay~

But I am manifesting that you will encounter this when the universe deems you need to be lovingly knocked down a few pegs~

Nothing wrong with a little loving call-out?

Pile 1:

Cards Pulled:

Queen of Wands, Hierophant, 5 of Coins

Hi Pile 1, if you chose this pile, whenever part of your journey you read this, here are your little warnings you might need to know, so only take what resonates with you, okay?

"Aren't you getting a bit over your head lately? Nothing wrong about being confident in your own abilities but you don't need to rub it in other people's faces that you know you're that Queen B~"

"There's a fine line between confidence and arrogance, my dear. If you don't want to be perceived as someone abrasive or cheap, you know what you need to do."

"Traditions are great and all but there's always room to make new traditions. Honoring the past doesn't mean you have to continue living in the past."

"Which would you prefer being ruthlessly right all the time and be hated? Or learn how to communicate compassionately without sacrificing your truth?"

"Don't expect different results when you're clearly stuck in your ways."

"No matter how much you mean well, if you don't know how to respectfully convey your messages properly, you will not be understood in a way that you'd prefer."

"Don't expect other people to pick up on your body language and subtle hints. Not everyone is as painfully self aware as you."

"Your Past pain is valid but your attitude is not."

"You keep behaving like you can't get passed your trauma from your past then btch out on how cruel life was for you, so you project your hurt towards others, especially towards people who are living the life that you want. Seriously, pick a struggle and push through it. Make it make sense."

"You are not bound to the environment you grew up in, because you have the power to change your destiny. Remember, at the end of the day, only you can save yourself from your circumstance."

"You are more capable than you let yourself believe you are. You just chose to live in your pain when you know you have to put in the effort for you to change your life for the better."

"You are bound by your own self imposed limitations. You are imprisoned in your mind by your own fear."

Channeled Song:

(this concludes the end of your reading)

(this is strictly for entertainment purposes only)

Pile 2:

Cards Pulled:

Queen of Swords, Chariot, Strength

Hi Pile 2, if you chose this pile, whenever part of your journey you read this, here are your little warnings you might need to know, so only take what resonates with you, okay?

- "I'm all up for honesty, just not verbal abuse. So be discerning if the receiver of the message is too soft hearted or easily traumatised."

- "Words are double edged swords. The same words that can heal can also break someone's heart."

- "Discern which battles are worth fighting for. Know when to retreat your words when you know that how you speak may bring more harm than good."

- "Being assertive and a goal getter is nice and all, but remember, your passion may be misinterpreted as abrasive and uncouth. Remember to respect other's personal boundaries."

- "Going after what you want is normal, disregarding someone's feelings and free will isn't."

- "Think before you speak or do."

- "Your way isn't the only way."

- "Impulsive behaviour leaves you susceptible to disaster and unnecessary quarrel. It won't kill you to think before you leap."

- "You don't need to so harsh and dominant to be perceived as strong."

- "Having strength does not warrant you to be mannerless and disrespectful."

- "Hypervigilance doesn't mean you're strong. It means you've been pushed to the corner where you had no one to rely on, especially during the times you need anyone the most."

- "Being able to do everything on your own doesn't mean you don't need help. You can lean on to others unharmed too. Not everyone is out to get you."

- "Just because you used to being in pain and on your own, it doesn't mean that what you've gone through is something you deserve. Don't catastrophize every bad thing that's happened to you as a punishment from the universe. Unfortunately, bad things happen for no reason. You were just unfortunately at the wrong place in the wrong time."

- "You don't deserve to be stuck in your hyperindepence and wear your lack of trust in others like a badge of honor. Your body can only hold so much trauma before it starts completely wrecking your nervous system and have it physically manifest as an illness. Ex. You struggle to lose weight no matter how much you work out because your body doesn't feel safe to exist. That's why you body stores fat as a cushion to help make it feel safe to exist."

- "How far will you keep pushing the people you love away? Are you waiting for their patience to run out so that you can subconsciously prove to yourself that everyone would leave you?? You're so hellbent in your skewed narrative that feeds your self-sabotaging tendencies and lack of self worth that you'd do anything to have your negative self talk to manifest into your reality. Stop feeding yourself the BS that (If they're meant for me, they'll stay. News Flash, no one wants to willing stay with someone who refuse to grow out of their own toxicity. No one can save you but yourself. EVEN YOUR LOVED ONES HAS LIMITS TOO."

- "Be a dear and search up the meaning of the ff. words: GASLIGHTING, STONE WALLING, COVERT NARCISSIST, ACCOUNTABILITY, EMOTIONAL MATURITY, JEALOUSY, SOFT FBOI/GURL, SHADOW WORK, MALADAPTIVE DAYDREAMING (Feel free to see which words hurts the most for you and start working on that)"

- "No one can save you from your own self imposed mental prison of scarcity and unworthiness. People around you can only do so much for you. The power to trap you and free you has always been in your hands."

- "Are you done thinking that everyone is out to get you? Hopefully you'd come to realise that people don't think about you as much as you think they do. Everyone's busy barely surviving their lives to be bothered to meddle with yours."

- "You're not as strong as much as a target you think you are, and that's okay. You don't have to be in everyone's mind and in everyone's DM to feel important. You are worthy and deserving of all regardless if you are in the spotlight or behind the scenes."

- "Two things can be true at the same time. You are the Main Character of your life and also be a background character is someone else's storyline."

- "What's serious for you may not be serious for someone else. So don't expect others to adjust for you when you made zero efforts to properly communicate what you wanted to say."

Channeled Song:

(this concludes the end of your reading)

(this is strictly for entertainment purposes only)

Pile 3:

Cards Pulled:

7 of Swords, Ace of Swords, 6 of Wands

Hi Pile 3, if you chose this pile, whenever part of your journey you read this, here are your little warnings you might need to know, so only take what resonates with you, okay?

- "Just because someone broke your heart it doesn't give you the right to leave a trail of broken hearts in your path. Your pain is valid but your attitude and actions afterwards aren't."

- "Being betrayed in the past doesn't mean you should play and to toy with someone else's feelings. You are becoming the player that you hated the game for."

- "Not all people mean to use and abuse you. Other people are just good natured and mean what they say. Don't confuse someone's genuity because someone else broke your trust before."

- "Discernment is highly encouraged, projecting your pain and jealousy isn't."

- "It's great to chase new ideas, what's not great is to chase the idea of someone new then cheat on your current partner just because things got bored. Don't be a part of the problem."

- "Don't even dare entertain anyone new just because you chose to be lazy and not put in the effort to communicate on how your current relationship can get better. Emotionally opening up to someone is cheating. Having a work husband/wife is still cheating. Putting yourself in any situation that would cause your partner to doubt your loyalty is a breeding ground of disaster of the life you currently know."

- "If you caved in and cheat now, you are bound to cheat again. If you allow yourself to be tempted now, you have proven yourself unworthy to even be in a loving relationship. In short: you have become part of the problem. So don't expect receiving anything you refused to give. You have no right to the privileges of an exclusive and healthy relationship if you fck around and find out. (because you actively chose to play whack a mole and find out what it's like to have std because of your recklessness)."

Channeled Song:

- "How far will you go just to win? Will you cheat on your partner just to have a promotion? Will you pay someone to ruin your competition just to win? Will you start a smear campaign just to go ahead? Will you drop little white lies to make yourself appear as the better option? How illegal and immoral would you allow yourself to become just to get ahead? Is it worth it? Lose your friends and family along the way? Just to win that empty cup?"

- "Will you abandon your morals just to win?"

(this concludes the end of your reading)

(this is strictly for entertainment purposes only)

Pile 4:

Cards Pulled:

6 of Swords, Knight of Cups, 7 of Wands

Hi Pile 4, if you chose this pile, whenever part of your journey you read this, here are your little warnings you might need to know, so only take what resonates with you, okay?

- "Unfortunately, leaving the problem behind without any explanation or letter won't make it go away."

- "Ghosting, just to protect your ego, is never the answer. Face your issues like an adult and accept the consequences of your actions accordingly."

- "No amount of dr*gs, alcohol, smoke or flings can help you tun away from your own willful ignorance. You can't run away from your own feelings. The only way to get away/rid of your problem is by facing it. This is one of the moments in a person's life where DELULU is NOT the SOLULU."

- "Fleeing the country won't keep you from feeling your feelings."

- "Just because you understand how people work and emotionally operate, it doesn't mean that you should use that to your unfair advantage. Stop binge watching those dark psychology videos. And you wonder why people pick a bad vibe from you? What do you expect? You are indeed the problem: the not so covert manipulative problem."

- "Stop using the promise of helping others with their dreams just so you can trick them in making your dreams come true at their expense."

- "You can only spin a web of lies so far."

- "You're not as convincing of a gaslighter as you think you are. People can see through your lies, they just chose not to speak up because, yes, they do it out of pity."

- "Resilience is incredibly admired but bulldozing other people out of your way to get the results is out of the question."

- "Not seeing the results that you want then btching about not having slept enough and feeling like you're about to collapse? You chose to overwork and overburden yourself to the point of burn out, and you're shocked that your health and sanity is fcked up? Dear, make it make sense."

- "Has it ever occurred to you that just because you put in the effort to win someone over, it doesn't mean that they're obligated to choose you? Free will and preferences are a thing, you know? You can be everything and more to that person, and that person is not required nor obligated to choose you. You can the most ideal man/woman and still not be chosen."

- "Don't expect exclusivity from someone who told you from the beginning that they're there to fck around. You can't change someone just because you stayed. You can only keep someone that wants to be kept by you."

Channeled Song:

(this concludes the end of your reading)

(this is strictly for entertainment purposes only)

Feel free to check out my feedback herePaid Readings are AVAILABLE

In all honesty, I feel so bad for releasing this PAC but there's this oddly strong gut feeling that we all need to be humbled and wake up to the toxicity we all chose to lie with at night.

In fact, some things we've gone through, unfortunately are the results of our own lack of accountability.

Sorry if I hurt your feelings, but some painful warnings need to be said.

Notice:

Exchange Readings are OPEN

Feel free to send me some support in the form of tips,

Head to my Buy-Me-A-Coffee here 🍀

[noofvcks]

Your comment is disrespectful and unnecessary imo. And you made me see why a lot of non Americans think/ feel like you guys can be self centered:

I understand that you have criticisms of the American system, which are absolutely valid… denounced and even felt outside the US (since most of north countries follow the American system. I’m from France and we’re literally crying everyday for the same reasons you mentioned). I’m pretty sure there are movements that denounce all that you just said (here the difference).

However, my message was aimed at situations where basic human rights are violated, where war, famine and oppression plunge entire populations into unimaginable conditions of survival. And, the most important part, TO A POPULATION WHO HAS ABSOLUTELY NO ONE FOR ANYTHING that’s why we think about them and speak for them (and ofc several countries, such as north countries and sell out are responsible of that). Comparing this to your reality can be insensitive and confusing since each struggle has its legitimacy and actually… the same oppressors!

But they are not equivalent.

Please respect the context of my message. Absolutely nobody asked you to do anything? I’m a black African (Congolese🇨🇩) woman living in France 🇫🇷 and I decided that my home or the conditions of black people in general will come first or count has much as what I’m living. So I will always relay, speak, understand and support every time have the chance to, like many of us out there.

Free

[champignonoftheforest]

This is just your daily reminder that your lived experience is valid. No one else gets to speak on if you’ve had it rough or not. No one else gets to tell you that everything you’ve suffered through was for attention. No one gets to tell you that you should’ve just tried harder or been better. No one gets to tell you that someone else having it harder invalidates your own struggle. Your pain is valid. Your struggle is valid. You are valid.

[shannonsketches]

he's so important to me

[thefairfolk]

it's funny because women in the middle east will be beaten and/or killed for letting their hair show, are constantly shown propaganda from first grade about how they need to cover themselves and be modest and docile if they don't want to end up in hell with other scum, expelled from high school/college or forced to abstain from participating in important exams if they speak out against the government, have poisonous gas cans tossed into their schools as an intimidation tactic, are made to feel bad for having working mothers, and generally live in a country where not only they but also people of other genders are, majority-wise, in a state of poverty in comparison to the western world, yet still continue to be calm and powerful.

and first world women (whether white or black) will weep at seeing the stupid barbie movie and think that THAT'S the pinnacle of women's rights. like, that is PEAK self-centred ignorance.

i don't think that the western world is some kind of perfect utopia for women. i understand it has its own flaws. but you can't possibly expect me to believe that people there understand just how bad things are here. in fact, considering the fact that growing up here has taught me a lot of important facts, i'd say it was a vital experience.

heed the tags.

[charlie-bonkerz]

a couple things mootie

number 1, NEVER be afraid or nervous to share ur opinion or speak ur mind on the internet. worst thing that happens is u gotta block someone. its like that one audio- "what r u gonna do??? punch me with an emoji???"

and number 2- no hate to ur friend but oh brother.

did. did they read it with their eyes closed????

the sad thing is this is not just an opinion that JUST your friend has. last year, we read the outsiders in school, and thats what got me into the fandom. (i had read it in 7th grade and i didnt really care about it bc i was young and stupid but thats another story)

i found that a lot of classmates were valuing the greasers as characters moreso than what they represented. and that makes sense!! the characters are why everyone loves this book in the first place. but if you wanna get to the core, you have to put the "real people" aspect of them aside- (which is difficult, because of how well written they are) they were looking at it through ponyboys perspective a little TOO hard, and they were missing the bigger picture. i think we r forgetting that this is a literal 14 year old- a MIDDLE SCHOOLER if this took place in modern times. (no offense to any 14 year olds reading)

i know ive already been like "the outsiders is a story about blank" like 5 times but its about a LOT of things. its ALSO about something my 11th grade history teacher likes to call; "The Human Condition."

The Human Condition (which is not a new term), refers to the universal experiences of being human, like love, loss, youth, morality, pain, etc. think "the dead poet's society." (which, if you havent seen, i 100000% recommend.)

despite these words we use to define and establish differences between ourselves, we are all human. and with humanity comes struggle. it is born within all of us. but so is love, and beauty etc etc etc.

all this big long essay post really boils down to this: the differences between socs and greasers are real, valid, and important. social groups are inevitable, natural, and even necessary. but, again, at the end of the day, the sunset is the same on both sides of town.

"you can't ever win you know that doesn't matter if you win us you'll still be where you were before the bottom and we'll still be the lucky ones at the top with all the breaks"

Randy sounding almost mocking at the end because he's realized this whole cycle is useless and suddenly he really doesn't believe in it anymore and his anger can't mask that anymore, Pony just listening cause he's known this his whole life and he's watching it hit someone on the "other side" suddenly neither of them is a "soc" or a "greaser" they're just two really hurt and confused kids who are seeing each other as such

[kingofanemptyworld]

ngl I started crying a little over this

[itspileofgoodthings]

one of my fave things about teaching is that I’m NOT a counselor and I don’t have to get into the weeds with a student but also I’m part of their life every day and i see when they’re struggling and I can ask how them how they’re doing and make sure that they know I see them on a steady, daily basis and it will be healing for both of us

[tethrarisms]

So many beautiful things about these panels: Cyrus acknowledging that he was saved from his own despair thanks to the protagonists; the fact that he doesn’t punish Charon for his betrayal, simply leaving him behind instead; listening to Jupiter’s words and taking full responsability, even though he doesn’t intend to do bad stuff with Team Galactic anymore; the sweet moment when his Magneton lifts the three admins, taking them with him.

Cyrus slowly embracing his own flaws and imperfections by finding completeness in others is just so meaningful and sweet, especially for someone who grew up in an abusive household and had a hard time making friends, choosing to tinker with machines instead.The pain he endured all by himself, the fact that he lost Rotom for some reason, the loneliness and struggles. He never deserved any of that. And he never meant to destroy the world or hurt people, although his actions are controversial. He just wanted to get rid of emotions because he was never enough for his parents. He never found himself enough, often seeing his own existence as incomplete because he never had validation or affection. Still, he has such a strong will. He did everything he could to make a new world without any strife (albeit as twisted as his mind at that time).

Cyrus was never meant to be evil. He was literally just in a very sad and lonely position when growing up. He was in deep pain and by default decided to interpret that pain as a flaw of the spirit. “I can’t feel pain if I don’t feel anything at all.” As twisted as this thought is, it had logic for him, and he treasured logic above everything else. It made sense in his mind and this is why he was only able to see the errors of his ways when he realized that his plan would never be possible. He started listening and opening his heart to Diamond, and he finally understood that he could have overcome all that pain by finding peace and support in others, which is particularly hard for him because how could he trust people when his own family saw him as a disappointment, no matter how high his grades were or how hard he tried to live up to their expectations?

And yet, against all odds, he is trying. He literally found redemption by changing his own perspectives of the world, all by himself. That’s how strong Cyrus’s heart, will and spirit are.

[cloudyestcat]

i had a conversation with someone from Disability Services at my school that turned into more of a heart-to-heart. i confided in him that there's actually a lot of jobs/careers i couldn't do because of my disability, and usually i don't mind because those would be hell for me anyway regardless, but with the one i really wanted to take, that wasn't the case. i really tried to make it work. but i couldn't, and i explained why. same with full-time school.

he said that he didn't want to sound discouraging or like i can't do it, but that it's best to be realistic with myself about my options in life. and that was so comforting. i wouldn't have minded at all if he really did mean it like "i agree; you can't do it;" the thing many abled people don't understand is that there's a lot of liberation that comes from letting go of the expectation that we disabled people can do everything an abled person can.

it saves us a lot of mental and physical pain, lost sleep, obsessing, self-neglect, injuries, getting acute illnesses more easily, chronic/episodic conditions flaring up more/worse than before, the pain of always masking how hard it is. working 10+ times harder than everyone else just to achieve the same result. and sometimes, if we can manage to hide how much we're struggling, the downside of that is that no one is aware that we are, so they think we have the ability to try even harder so we can achieve even more. so they push us past our limits before either of us realize what's going on.

please, if a disabled person comes to you and says, "i've done everything i can to try to make this work, but i've come to the realization that i can't do it," or, "i can't do it without help/support/a caregiver," validate the temporary pain of that while also acknowledging the reality that this is liberating in the long run. because you can rest now. finally.

"Disabled people can do everything abled people can!1!1!!" I'm gonna have to ask you what you think disabled means

[themoonunderstoodmydadjokes]

I think at the end of the day I just want to be allowed to be a complex and complicated human being and know that people are still going to choose to be in my life ya know?

[dreamersneverlose]

For the first time in a long time, I haven’t the faintest idea what life is going to look like 1, 2, 6 months from now. How terrifyingly beautiful this will be.

[angorwhosebabyisthis]

do you ever just look back at something an ex said to you and regret that it did not turn into a full blown fight

[toytulini]

But Also i do think. Expecting Crisp Ironed Clothes of someone in a fucking job interview is Unhinged. I think most professional dress standards are Stupid.

[tommyssupercoolblog]

not putting the reblog banner on this one bc it would feel disrespectful. anyway big fucking mood, felt in my soul. trying SO HARD not to think abt the drama rn.