#non SAM aromantic

[papercranesandpride]

Shout out to all of the non-SAM aromantics and allosexual aromantics who decided to browse what exactly our fellow community members posted to get aromantic trending and found it was, inevitably, a whole lot of stuff about "stealing valentine's day for the aroaces," aroace headcanons, aroace pride, and "making sure asexuality and aromanticism trend for valentine's day" and just generally conflating aromanticism with asexuality and ignoring our existence yet again. I know I was very excited about seeing us get to have our moment in the spotlight, and then had it crushed by being erased and drowned out in my own community yet again.

Apparently some people don't realize that this holiday still sucks even if you're not ace, because it is much more of a holiday about love and celebrating your romantic partner than it is about sex.

It's always fun to be reminded why generally I stick to allo aro and loveless tags and avoid the main aro one like the plague. I'd rather not see a thousand aroace posts to every one that actually applies to me.

Anyway. As a perpetually angry alloaro, I see y'all.

[agressivelyaro]

Why I'm no longer using the label non sam aro

I don't really talk abt my label usage/personal stuff a lot but I wanted to shed some light on actual aro experiences being out irl. I feel like tumblr is often an echo chamber of aro acceptance and it's easy to forget not everyone irl understands the community as well as people online.

I've used the label non sam aro for a while, and aromantic for even longer. I did briefly identify as ace but did not come out to anyone in my life/let them know I was using that label, and soon found out that I'm not ace.

Recently, people have been assuming or erasing parts of my identity. From adding ace to the aro, or completely ignoring my aromanticism and just calling me ace. it's uncomfortable to be forced into a box, let alone one that doesn't fit you at all. I've corrected people before but every time it's a fruitless effort

In order to avoid this, I'm now using the label aromantic bisexual. I like the label bi, I feel like it's a good descriptor of me and I have used it in the past. I feel like, when I'm not providing a sexuality, people take it upon themselves to fill that gap with the term asexual despite me having never mentioned it before.

I think a part of it is people not liking to think about sexual attraction without any romantic. in order to 'justify' my aromanticism, they feel like I have to be ace.

In calling myself bi, I'm hoping that people will have no choice to avoid the idea of another part of my identity. If I provide a label completely separate to the one they're putting on me, they'll have to choose the one I chose. Even if people then erase my aromanticism, at least they'll be calling me bisexual, a label that I chose myself.

TLDR: I'm no longer calling myself non sam aro, and am instead calling myself aromantic bisexual, in the hopes that people irl stop forcing the asexual label on to me.

[aiizaph]

saw your post on how exhausting being alloaro is and. i just want to say. we love you sm and i hope you have a great day <33

Tysm. I’m technically a non-SAM aro (though, I really wish I was aroallo) but I did make that post generally about aromantics who aren’t asexual (non-SAM aros, aroallos, people who only use the aromantic label, and possibly more). It’s a bit disheartening to see that the amount of ace/aroace people liking that post is creeping up, but I’m glad there are other non-ace aros finding it.

I just hope that one day, I’ll be able to find someone like me irl… Then maybe I could finally stop feeling so alienated and alone all the time…

[allegoriesandepithets]

Large Pixel Size Non-SAM A- Flags

[PT: Large Pixel Size Non-SAM A- Flags]

Non-SAM Ace ~ Non-SAM Aro

Non-SAM Apl ~ Non-SAM Aqp

Non-SAM Analt ~ Non-SAM Asen ~ Non-SAM Anae

Definition: One who is a- [attraction type] and does not use the split attraction model (SAM).

All credit goes to @ryanyflags, these are basically just higher quality versions of cos flags, although I did slightly change the colors of the apl and aqp flags.

All flags are 3000x2000 pixels.

@tertiary-attraction-archive @orientation-archive @radiomogai @liom-archive @imoga-pride

[headcanon-vault]

tornear headcanon icons

aromantic // non-sam aromantic // trans // trans man

art by @/eggfeather

[aro-absol]

Hi, saw you reblog a non-SAM aro ask game! Here's a few I'd like to hear about from you, if you're comfortable! :)

Would you be able to classify yourself as closer to / fitting in better with aroace or aroallo people? Or not?

What is a sign from your childhood that you were non-SAM aromantic?

What would you tell your younger self, in relation to your aromanticism?

Is there a song that gives you non-SAM aromantic vibes?

Thanks for the ask!

2. Would you be able to classify yourself as closer to / fitting in better with aroace or aroallo people? Or not?

I think my experiences align a lot more with the aroaces than with the aroallos. I don't really know if I feel sexual attraction or not. So technically, I could just slap a quoisexual label on and call myself aroace. But the thing is, I don't care about my sexuality at all and the ace label doesn't sit with me right.

Because what connects me to the aroallo community is the focus I put on my aromanticism. It seems to be a common thing in the aroace community to deem your ace identity more important than your aro identity. Which, on individual level, is totally fine; of course you can make that decision for yourself. However, that is often assumed to be a general aroace experience to the point that even allos who barely know anything about aroace people think it's true (see the treatment of every fictional aroace character ever). With this kind aromantic erasure, I feel not very comfortable in aroace spaces online. There is no sense of belonging like there is with the aro community.

It might just be a stepping stone for me, but right now it feels best to not sort myself in the asexual - allosexual binary.

12. What is a sign from your childhood that you were non-SAM aromantic?

There aren't that many, to be honest. I was painfully oblivious to the fact that allos actually have crushes in their teenage years, so I didn't really notice I was not within the norm. When I was little (like six or so), I never really imagined being partnered in the future. But apparently, other kids that age think about who'll they marry someday. I never ever did. But that's all I can think of right now.

16. What would you tell your younger self, in relation to your aromanticism?

That it exists. I would grab myself by the shoulders and shake while telling myself that everyone my age has crushes and I don't. And that that is called being aromantic and that I'm allowed to call myself that.

18. Is there a song that gives you non-SAM aromantic vibes?

I have a collection of songs that, to me, are about love from an aromantic point of view. While some of the songs are from an aroallo perspective, many don't mention sexuality at all so they fit in with non-SAM aromanticism very well.

Some favorites would be "Sorry" by Halsey, "Never been in love" by Will Jay and "Zero feelings" by Zoe Clark.

I posted my full playlist here.

[thermodynamic-comedian]

hello, tumblr user. before you is an aromantic character. they have never expressed any hint of asexuality. your task is simple: do not refer to them as an "aroace" or get mad at people writing smut about them. the duration of this task is the rest of your life. if you fail at any point in the future, i will personally shoot you.

good luck.

[i-suggest-aro]

aromanticism deserves to be celebrated outside of the context of asexuality.

aromanticism deserves to be accepted and discussed without even mentioning asexuality.

aromantic allosexuality deserves to be celebrated.

aromanticism, on its own, with nothing else added, is fucking awesome.

[arokalypse]

some arospec flag gifs below for your aro doomscrolling experience

[agressivelyaro]

(for science)

[aiizaph]

Decided to put some blue/green Pokémon on the non-SAM aro flag for fun

Feel free to use as pfps. Credit’s not necessary.

[aro-absol]

[ID: Two pictures of Moana, the protagonist from the computer animated movie with the same name. She's a Polynesian teenage girl or young woman with long, dark brown, curly hair. She has light brown skin and dark brown eyes. In the first picture, she's shown from the waist up, wearing a red and white tube top with a floral pattern on it, and a necklace made of pearls and a blue gemstone. She has a smug facial expression. In the second picture, she's shown from her shoulders up. She's not wearing a necklace but instead, she has a big flower crown with pink flowers on her head. She has her eyes focused on something off-screen. / End ID]

Aromantic Character of the Day (30/12/24 BONUS) is....

Moana (Moana) !

Admin headcanons Moana as non SAM aromantic!

[justlikeheavenfest]

register now for access to passes, on sale this friday at 11am PT. May awaits with arms outstretched. 🫶 $49.99 down payment plans available. www.justlikeheavenfest.com

[heartless-aro]

I see a lot of people in the aroace community on here talk about how we should have a pride gradient aroace tag, but I rarely see people bring up the possibility of other aspec pride gradient tags for identities of similar levels of specificity to aroace, like alloaro or alloace. As much as I would love to have an aroace colored tag, I think we’re setting our sights too low here.

[twigstarpikachutroll22]

Reblog for something aspec to happen to you this summer

[aro-absol]

1, 5, 9, 13

Thanks for the ask! And thank you for making the ask game by the way, I am enjoying it very much.

1. What is your place on the aromantic spectrum? Do you use any specific labels for romantic attraction?

I just go by aromantic. I don't think I've ever felt romantic attraction and none of the aro microlabels feels like home. Besides, I'm enjoying using less specific label because it makes me feel closer to other aros. No matter where exactly on the aromantic spectrum a person is, we're all aromantic and that's super cool.

5. Do you experience any attraction you choose not to label?

Well, being a non-SAM aro I don't label my sexual attraction but I'm also not sure if I even experience that attraction. When it comes to tertiary attraction, I still need to figure out what it means to me personally. I still need to find a definition of attraction that works for me.

That being said, I'm pretty sure I'm alloplatonic. I desire friendship and around some friends, I feel very warm inside sometimes. Whether that is something that falls under attraction or if I feel more comfortable calling it affection or another term is something I'll start figuring out in the future. I don't get squishes to the point of strong infatuation, though. Still, I think I have a very normative experience with friendship, and therefore I am technically alloplatonic. I don't really call myself that, though (because most allos don't even know it's a thing). The only time I do say it is when I reblog something about aplatonic experiences or something that describes different views on friendship within the aromantic community, just to make sure that I can't speak for any aplatonics. So that might fall into this category? Other than that, not really.

9. What is something you think is ‘non-SAM aro culture’ or inherently non-SAM aro? Either serious or joking?

I honestly can't think of anything.

13. What is your favourite thing about being non-SAM aro?

That I can just be aro. When you use no sexuality label, people need to refer to you as aromantic when talking about your orientation (considering they want to refer to you correctly). I'm not out to anyone, so I don't know from experience, but that sounds pretty nice.

Another big thing for me is that I don't have to let people in on my sexual desires (or lack thereof). Sex life and sexual desire are things that feel very private to me, so I don't see why so many people should know whether I want someone sexually or not. Besides, most allos think of asexuality as voluntary celibacy (I know that's not true, you know that's not true, but the allos don't) and my sex life is just none of people's business. Then again, I'm not out at all, so I don't know.

[papercranesandpride]

Reblogging this because hey look what people are doing again when we're trying to reclaim the day about romance. Hey non-SAM aros and allo aros. I see you

I am so pissed. The whole reason we're trending is that stupid poll about if a aro cisgender heteroSEXUAL man is queer. By definition, an allo aro. And STILL, even when the entire point is recognizing allo aros as important parts of the community who exist, aro just cannot be trending without ace and ace is automatically categorized by tumblr as going with aro instead of them being separate things. Gee, I wonder why allo aros feel alienated and unrecognizedand like we're not part of our own community when even aro positivity excludes us and says that we don't belong.

I'm sorry, I know we're all celebrating aromantic being trending and we're all supposed to be happy about it. But no. I'm pissed off. What is the point of aros being visible on this website if half of us aren't visible at all? Is it really a win if all it's really conveying is the never-ending belief that one cannot possibly be aro without being ace?