#no yeah I only started reading the comics after watching the show but I fucking love a game of you!!!

[leatherbookmark]

ooooh apparently the pjo show is out? or is it just the first episode? i'm not sure but. hm!!

[duchess-of-new-shire]

This particular flavor of internet media taste really speaks to the far reaching and pervasive nature of nuclear family ideals actually

Like if it's not focused on a romantic pair or one half of a romantic pair (specifically a man) than it's seen as inherently "bad" or "boring" or "off topic"

Especially in the case of the sandman I find this fucking ridiculous because like. Telling stories is the point. It's not supposed to be a neat little unit it's a sprawling web of narratives and characters and lives, intersecting and tangling and leaving loose ends.

There are a lot of stories that do gay shippy junk and I really like those stories, but the sandman does something far more interesting and it should not be punished by its audience for daring to give us something exciting

and to be completely honest i don’t even think the majority of the show!sandman fandom on tumblr would even like a game of you! dream barely shows up. there aren’t really any (human) male characters to ship, only—qué horror—canonically queer women. hell, who’s the white dude people are gonna latch onto? fuckin’ george, the asshole whose face gets sliced from his head, brought back to life, and nailed to a wall while the rest of his corpse hangs out in the bathtub? and aside from the tumblr fandom, imdb ratings went down significantly when season 1 pivoted to focus on rose, and reviewers complained about how there wasn’t enough of dream. multiple factors point to the idea that a game of you would have an extremely disappointing audience response, and unfortunately that might reinforce the idea to executives and such that people don’t want to see wlw stories at front and center. and our girls deserve so much better than all of this potential bullshit. so i would in fact prefer for a game of you not to get adapted in full, because it would break my heart a little to see people hate on it.

[spookykoolkat]

I absolutely adore your writing!

I wanted to request a Eddie Munson and plus size!Henderson!reader smut!

After dropping Dustin off after Hellfire one night Eddie finally meets Dustin’s sister who is essentially the female version of Eddie. He is smitten with her but doesn’t show it in fear it will mess up him and Dustin’s relationship. He makes excuses to come over to the house more often (which the reader notices). She teases him on purpose, short skirts, low cut shirts, little touches when they pass each other. She’s driving him crazy. One night Dustin invites him over for a movie night and to discuss the new campaign, when Eddie and the reader are the only ones left awake will the tension be to much? Will he finally crack?

eddie m. - your brother's rocker best friend

main masterlist

an: hiii!!! thank u sm for the request AND all the love i've gotten on my work 🖤🖤 i hope this does your request justice omg!! 😭 because i sure as hell really liked writing it idkidkidk eddie in this one is just so 😵‍💫😵‍💫 anyways pls feel free to send more requests, i appreciate all the love omg like i didnt know so many ppl would like my writing especially being new to writing on tumblr 🥹TYSM OMG PLS I HOPE EVERYONE ENJOYS THIS i love the feedback! also this is hardly proof read so. yeah :p

warnings: 18+ only, minors dni! minors are NOT welcomed. eddie x plus size!reader, eddie x henderson!reader. this is pure filth, pure smut, literally porn with a plot. p in v (unprotected) *this is fiction pls protect urself*, slight exhibitionism (if u squint), oral sex (f receiving), mirror sex kind of, pet names, dirty talk, spanking/slapping, eddie being eddie

wc: 8.5k

summary: you're dustin's older sister, and notice his best friend taking a particular liking to you.

when eddie first realized who dustin’s older sister was, he was mind fucked. when dustin told eddie about you, dustin made it a note to emphasize the fact that he and you were the same age, and had eddie been, as dustin put it, ‘normal student,’ he would’ve graduated the same year as his sister. but, eddie remembered who you were. very vividly, and when he met you again formally at dustin’s house about a year ago—let’s just say eddie was obsessed with everything that had to do with you. he listened to the music you blasted from your room once he got into his van, he remembered the movies you watched so he could watch them and know why you liked them so much, and he remembered the books you carried and the ones you would read in your living room on his way to dustin’s basement. he wanted to consume you in every way.

"i can't really stay long dustin, Wayne's been getting on my ass," eddie said as dustin dragged him to his front door.

"yeah yeah, whatever, come on i just got this new comic, you have to see it," he said eagerly and eddie just sighed, waiting for dustin's knocking to be heard. and it was.

"dustin i swear if you don't have your key i'm going to literally rip-" you yelled through the front door as you swung it open, not to see only dustin but the guy you went to school with who you knew as the local weed supplier.

"what are you doing with my brother?" you spit, ignoring the fact that eddie looked a little starstruck. he didn't even hear you because of how loud your outfit was, the way your body was tight against your little dress you had in, how your tits looked pressed together, the way your hand rested on your hip as you looked at him irritatedly.

"don't start," dustin said and pushed passed you, telling eddie to come on.

"uh, i'm eddie," he introduced and you smiled through your small laugh, opening the door.

"yeah, i know who you are," you said and he almost thought he felt a shiver down his spine. you knew him, you knew who he was. and now that he saw you in person, he realized he overestimated his will power to be a gentleman and not get hard just at the sight of you.

"go ahead, but you're not staying long. ten minutes." you said strictly and he nodded frantically, stepping inside and following dustin straight to the basement, his eyes looking back for yours as you shut the door and turned, giving him a smile.

he was fucked. that was the start of a year long obsession he tried so desperately to hide. and failed.

you noticed eddie and you had the same interests, you heard megadeth and soundgarden blast through his radio in his shitty van dropping dustin off late, and even in school you saw the patches of rock and metal bands you liked on his backpack, or the studs on his jean jacket. you liked his style and like him, you carried the punk rock edge to you with multiple facial piercings and your black clothing. you enjoyed your style, even in high school you managed to apply dark makeup and were only allowed on piercing, so you kept your lip one. you grew into your own as you got older, only having a liking for horror and sci-fi movies, metal, rock and goth music, and loving your dark dull aesthetic. and eddie liked it too, he actually couldn’t believe how sexy you made looking and dressing like a ‘freak.’

you also noticed these last few months eddie has been coming over a lot more frequently, sometimes at night, sometimes early in the morning to take dustin to school. you didn’t realize until he came over three days in a row, and noticed he would linger in the same room you were in while dustin was off doing his usual around the house, or he’d make comments about the movie you’d be watching and then leave. you never minded it of course, you liked talking to him, you actually felt seen around him and he made you feel like the two of you could relate a lot more than you think.

you also kind of liked to push how far you could go with his boundaries. you’ve had a small crush on him since he started coming around a year ago, you couldn’t help but feel a flutter when he’d greet you with a small hug, or a blush when he’d tell you he liked the outfit you had on. but as the months went on you noticed your words took effect on him too, and you relished in the fact that you knew you could make him squirm a bit.

he enjoyed it even though he knew what you were doing, even though he was going fucking insane. he refused to indulge in his fantasies, in dropping hints that he wanted you in every way possible, he refused to risk his own relationship with your brother. he tried for the entire year he and your brother were friends, to ignore the things you do involuntarily. he didn’t know if half the things you did were on purpose or not, but he had to choke down groans seeing you bend over in tight black dresses, he had to refrain from sneaking into your room just so he can see what it looks like. he hated that you did this to him, that you could be this damn sexy it’s like it was doomed from the beginning.

it was the night dustin had a few friends over for a small get together, one of them being eddie and the others being his usual friend group, mike, el, max, lucas, will and steve as well. steve was forced to go by dustin and eddie, eddie mainly begging because he didn’t want to be the only babysitter there.

you were wearing your usual lounging around outfit when you decided to change because you were heading out that night with a few friends, and you got into your usual all black outfit. only this time you had on black mini skirt on that barely covered your ass as you walked, so to help with coverage you chose black sheer, nearly see through, tights underneath that were slightly torn and ripped, and your top was a deep cut baby tee that was black with rhinestones on it. it was cute to you, you loved skimpy clothes as much as anyone else did and you loved the way it hugged onto your thick body.

you just finished your makeup when you decided to slip on your black heeled boots and go downstairs to gather your things. it was kind of like in the movies when the woman steps down the stairs in her ballgown, having her date gawk at her. only this time you had two little pieces of clothes dripped in all black, and eddie was the one gawking at you while everyone paid attention to the game they were playing.

“i can’t believe i’m here. where the fuck is robin and nance?” steve huffed as he slumped in his seat, eating his pizza.

“you know you should be more grateful to spend time with us, asshole. we could all die tomorrow!” dustin exclaimed from his seat, and steve just rolled his eyes.

“how about in right now?” he mumbled.

eddie wasn’t too focused on anything except the music coming from upstairs, is that the cranberries?, he asked himself, trying to crane his neck as if it’d make him hear better. it wasn’t long before he heard your door open and your hard footsteps treading down the stairs. he felt his heartbeat pick up and the minute you fell into his peripheral he had to turn to look at you. big fucking mistake.

the minute he saw your curvy figure in your tight clothing that just made everything more prominent, he felt that rush. not adrenaline rush, he felt his blood fall from his cheeks and straight into his cock. he was beyond embarrassed, lucky for him he was holding a pillow next to him and quickly moved it over his front. something you saw very briefly, wondering why he looked pained almost.

“alright, i’m leaving dustin, don’t fuck the house up or i will kill everyone here and get away with it,” you said emotionless, going to grab your purse and keys on the kitchen counter.

“don’t get pregnant!” dustin shouted from the living room and you walked back in to say goodbye to your little brother and his friends.

“yeah yeah you too, bye, love you,” you said and leaned down to leave a kiss on his forehead, something eddie paid way too close attention to. he could see down your shirt from his seat, and he could only feel his pants grow tighter around his waist. he wanted to stuff his face in your chest, to hold you by your wide waist and pull you to his body. he wanted to defile you more than you’d ever been.

“problem eddie?” you asked, snapping your fingers where you stand behind dustin, sending everyone’s eyes to his direction.

“uh, wha- I, no, yeah i like this game too,” he stuttered and mostly everyone tried to stifle their laugh while dustin questioned him.

“okay?” you said in a confused laugh, walking off around the group to pass by eddie and bringing your hand to ruffle through his brown locks, and to his shoulder to squeeze slightly.

“see ya later, weirdo,” you said and left, leaving eddie rock hard, embarrassed and in complete shock. he needed your touch everywhere, and that same night after he finally got home and laid in bed, he jerked off to the images he internally burned in his mind.

remembering that night gave you ideas for every time you saw him after that. wearing the skimpiest clothes to open the door when eddie walked dustin to the door, making sure that when he was there at your house you were wearing the thinnest tank top with no bra, and checking that the thermostat was set at a cool 69 degrees.

it was like hell. if he were in heaven. he was tortured seeing you, but the more he saw you the more he craved you. he was excited to see you now, to see what you would have one the next time as you offered a drink in a sultry voice, bending over extra low to reach a fake cord from behind the tv while he sat on the couch. he felt like he was going to fall into a deep black hole that would open up every time you were around, he could follow you around like a puppy if you wanted.

he made excuses to see you, he embarrassed himself in moments just so he could see you, or hear your voice. he was genuinely obsessed with you, that even seeing you for five seconds could make his entire day complete. he was desperate, and you knew.

“you, eddie munson, looking for homework?” you scoffed, crossing your arms over your chest to cover yourself. you felt exposed, just waking up from a nap after dropping dustin off early in the morning, wearing nothing but black shorts and a small tank top that was a little see through if you stared hard enough.

“uh, yeah it’s like this paper i had to write, for…” he trailed as his eyes unknowingly moved to glance over you. he couldn’t help but look at how the shorts hugged your thighs and hips. please let suffocate me. his thoughts were impure, not gentleman like. he should be ashamed.

“for…?” you asked, waving your hand in front of him to get his attention back.

“-my class, it’s in a few minutes,” he said checking his watch on his wrist.

“you do know dustin isn’t here right? and the backpack in question is… with him… at school,” you said in an obvious tone, making him reach to the back of his neck and cringe at himself.

“yeah, right…. um, bye,” he said quickly and left, cursing at himself under his breath as he tried to refrain from thinking of the way you looked before he grew hard. you didn’t shut the door until he drove off, almost smiling to yourself that he did that, made that silly excuse to just talk to you for two minutes.

it was little things that he did that drove you equally as crazy, and the fact that he did everything he could just to see your face made you want him even more. it made you wonder why he hadn’t tried anything with you yet. you assumed he felt like you did, so you didn’t question if he found you attractive or sexy, you just wondered what was holding him back from taking the next step.

«──── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ────»«──── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ────»

eddie found himself a bit stuck in his own thoughts as dustin, mike, will, gareth, jeff and lucas discuss plans of their next campaign. he wanted to focus on the words and suggestions coming out of dustin’s mouth, he wanted to shout desperately when gareth recommended something that would put the entire campaign in jeopardy, but nothing could come from him.

dustin invited everyone over to spend the night while they plan their new campaign for d&d, he knew it could take all night even the day after to create something flawless, so he figured it’d be best to have those who can sleep over. you were a bit bothered by having that much testosterone in the house, but a little won over by the fact that eddie would be spending the night as well.

you catered for the group of course. After you got home from work around seven or eight at night, you bought pizza and drinks for the kids and acted as their mother, fixing their sleeping arrangements and making sure everyone had pillows and blankets before bed. the minute you walked into your home with the pizza and drinks, everyone zoomed to the kitchen except eddie. he shyly walked over to you with his black jeans on and muscle shirt under his jean jacket.

“i can get that for you,” he offered, nodding to the pizza boxes and liters in both hands.

“here, you can take the drinks,” you smiled and handed him the bag of drinks, letting your fingers linger a little on his while transferring the bag to him. he could feel the softness of your touch, how you grazed the outside of his hand with your nails and smoothly removing your hand from the bag.

“thank you,” you said and lightly patted his chest, moving past him closely so that your body touches his.

stop it eddie. stop! he screamed at himself as you started to tell the kids to not make a mess, trying to keep himself from getting hard again and finally going to put the sodas on the counter where you placed the pizza.

“eddie?” you said and walked over to him where he holds a paper plate in his hand, his eyes wide and doe like as he turned to you immediately.

“yeah? whats up?” he said quickly, gripping his plate.

“you think you can help me make everyone’s bed? i can’t reach the sheets in the closet,” you said innocently, batting your eyelashes and flashing a smile.

“y-yeah, of course.” he obliged and put the plate down, following you upstairs to the closet in the hall. you made sure to go first, your pencil skirt hugging your ass and thighs perfectly, putting him in a trance he never wanted to get out of.

“it’s right over here,” you said and turned right, stopping at white double doors. you opened the doors and reached to turn on the light, letting yourself be as exaggerated as possible, and leaning back to let him through. you turned to the side as he walked up to the closet, staying there and watching him as he strained his body upwards, his shirt lifting a bit to show his pale skin littered with tattoos, even seeing his slight v-line, something you wanted to explore. you didn’t try to hide the fact that you were checking him out.

you decided to test him again, so you scooted your body closer to his and leaned across, your breasts and your body touching his as you reached for a pillow that was on a lower shelf. your hand skimmed his skin not so subtly, grabbing the pillow and squeezing it to your stomach to make your tits more prominent in your hardly buttoned button up.

eddie’s skin was on fire, if he wasn’t thinking about d&d before you came home, he definitely wasn’t thinking about it now. he gathered all of the sheets and some pillows, pulling them out and going back to his relaxed position as you stared up at him with a devilish smile.

“what do you think you’re doing?” he asked in a serious tone, taking notice of your breasts pushed together and again, you saw it on his face. that restraint, the self control he tried to muster up.

“what do you mean, eds?” you tried to play naive, like you were unaware of this little game the two of you had partaken in. it was cat and mouse except less action. you liked to tease and taunt, and he held himself tight with a piece of string that was held by the relationship he had with dustin. who would he be if he actually made a move on one of his best friend’s sister?

“i can’t do that to dustin. i can’t.” he said to you, not even acknowledging your fake unawareness.

“i don’t know what you’re talking about.” you said seriously and turned towards the stairs, “you comin’?” you asked sweetly, yet still a mischievous smile on your face. you were testing how far you could go without breaking that string, but now you wanted to break it. you wanted him to fall apart for you, to finally admit he’s wanted you this whole time.

eventually after everyone settled in, the group went down into the basement and began to watch a movie as the night went on. you told everyone you’ll be in your room, changing into something more comfortable to accompany your brother and his friends.

“it’s just supposed to be us,” dustin huffed and you rolled your eyes, accepting the fact you were unwelcomed and you changed anyway, going into the living room to watch a movie by yourself.

«──── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ────»«──── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ────»

the boys settled in the basement around 11 at night after arguing about their storyline, going to sleep with no successful campaign just yet but successfully watching two movies before everyone knocked out. eddie was no help obviously, too deep in thought about the way your hands felt, how your warm body pressed into his side, what exactly you were hiding under that pencil skirt. he didn’t realize how sexy you made office attire look, suddenly imagining himself bending you over your office desk and railing you to the point all of your papers and knick knacks fell over. it’s all he thought about as the boys talked over the movie, wondering what it would be like to just go upstairs and take you on the couch.

he rubbed his hand over his face with a deep breath, sighing and throwing over the blankets he had on himself on his other side, getting up from the small couch you had in your basement. eddie knew where everything was in the house, and he made his way to the kitchen for some kind of beverage. a beer, if he was lucky.

he was lucky, just not with the beer. once he got into the threshold of the kitchen, he saw the dim light from underneath the cabinet that’s above the counter glowing against you. your back was to him, seemingly eating something, yet he just stared at your figure. from here, the view of your ass was almost problematic. your tight shorts didn’t let much hide from his sight, he could see the crease of your asscheeks peeking out of the fabric, and he saw the small of your back due to your tank top rising up and nearly above your midriff.

“couldn’t sleep?” eddie asked you finally as he came to lean on the counter across from where you stood.

“i was just craving something sweet, you?” you asked, turning around unphased since you already felt him staring at you. you looked at him as you licked your spoon clean and he breathed in deep.

“something like that,” he said and stood up straight, walking around to you and now standing in front of you, leaning his body against the counter to mimic your stance.

“dustin’s my friend, you know that, and you're like, wow you know? it's hard to, control myself,” he slightly admits, beginning to watch as you sensually lick ice cream from your spoon again after you dipped into the pint for another scoop.

“mhm,” you hummed in agreement, eyes never leaving his. you weren't phased by his confession, you already knew. he tried to not show how in love he was with you, but failed miserable every time.

“i can’t do anything to ruin that, he’d hate me forever,” eddie said slowly, too enchanted by the way your tongue glides over the spoon.

“i don’t know what you mean, eddie,” still keeping up with your shenanigans, wondering if he’d snap any time soon.

“really? the short skirts, showing your cleavage, walking around here with no bra when i’m around, like you want me to die really,” he said dramatically, his hands waving in the air and you smiled, putting the ice cream down.

“that’s just how i dress, eddie. plus this is my house, i can wear whatever i want,” you gleamed and he huffed.

“i won’t lie though, some things i do wear for you. like this, i know you like black. and i know you like when i don’t wear a bra, i see you staring at them all of the time,” you said stepping closer to him as his fingers grip the edge of the counter. he was silent, he couldn't talk. embarrassed at the fact that you actually noticed his not so obvious yet obvious stares.

“do you wanna feel them eddie? or do you just want to stare from a distance and jerk off in the bathroom when i leave?” his face turned a bright red, remembering the times he’d have to leave early or go to your bathroom to deal with what you caused.

“yes,” he answered without thinking, stepping towards you so that there is only a small gap between the two of you. your head turns upwards to look at him as he looks down between the two of you, watching your chest rise and fall with every breath.

“do you want me to-” you began but eddie shook his head quickly.

“shut up,” he demanded, pressing his lips into yours firmly. but it wasn’t like you expected.

normally when you made out with guys, it was boring and dull. there was no excitement, no crave, no desire, it felt like nothing to you. but feeling eddie’s lips on yours practically made your knees buckle, so soft and gentle yet still needy, begging for more. you feel his tongue slide against your lips and you part them slightly, letting him invade your mouth as your tongue fought with his. heavy breathing, panting, soft moans coming from you and occasional groans from eddie as his hands rested at your waist, just to inch upwards on your skin and up your shirt.

he pulled away breathlessly, leaving you flushed and aching for me as his eyes trained on your midsection, watching the piece of fabric lift with every inch he went up.

“you, you are so fucking dangerous,” he said roughly, his black fingernails skimming against the curves of your body, his hands rubbing on your rolls, pressing them into your back to pull you closer.

you could tell his touch was so needy, so eager to feel all of you all at once.

“what makes me dangerous? is it my incredibly intimidating face?” you smiled, watching his eyes grow dark with every touch on your body.

“mm, no baby, you have a pretty face.” he said, more confident than ever now that he knows this little game of yours was over. baby. the pet name sending a shock of pleasure straight to your core that you has to press your thighs together. he noticed.

his hands move to your midsection again, finally deciding to raise the tank top up off of your body. this was risky, you knew that. you were exposed in the very public kitchen that anyone could walk in at any moment, pressed against the counter now with eddie teasing his way around your large breasts.

“holy fucking shit.” he breathed as he cupped them in his hands, massaging and feeling over every inch of skin. he bounced them in his hands, pushed them together to see them fall to their natural state, and immediately brought his lips to the curve of your breast and slowly towards your hardened nipple. he wanted to savor all of you, to feel you and memorize what you liked and what you looked like under all these clothes.

“eddie?” you whispered as he stuffed his face in between your tits as he pushed them up, making you smile boyishly.

“mmmhm?” he hummed, shaking his head in your chest and you tug his hair up, sending a jolt to eddie’s crotch and making him wince.

“do you want me?” you asked, looking at his face in the dull light, wanting to bask in his gaze. you loved the slight stubble on his jaw, how his nose was lightly peppered with small freckles, the way his lips looked so pink and swollen—it drove you crazy.

“fuuuck yes, yes i want you, are you crazy?!” he whisper-shouted, making you blush and pull your lip in between your teeth.

“show me,” you teased, moving your hand from gripping his hair and on his shoulder. he was so quick with grabbing your wrists and practically pulling you upstairs into your bedroom, shutting the door by pressing you up against it. it was so quick, you didn’t even feel shame in the fact that you only had your bottoms on going up your stairs.

“i would’ve loved to fuck you over that kitchen counter, but i’d rather not have dustin and our friends see me sinning with his older sister,” he said as he dipped his head into the crook of your neck and leaving small kitten licks and kisses on your skin.

“thank you,” you breathed, holding him tight to your body.

you did feel a bit bad about engaging with eddie like this, you knew it was a bad mistake as dustin’s sister. this was his best friend, and here you are in your bedroom with your tank top down stairs, feeling the way he’s pressed up against you.

“mm, don’t thank me yet, sweetheart,” he grinned into your collarbone.

“since i can’t fuck you over the counter, i think we’ll just have to settle for that little vanity you got,” his voice was so dark, so deep that you didn’t even really recognize who it was. it made you drip into your panties, and immediately you let out a tiny whine.

eddie moved you to the white, pristine vanity you had where you sat and did your makeup everyday. it wasn’t much, but it did come with a mirror and the thought of watching eddie fuck you from the back like that became too intense for you.

you instinctively bent over still in your short shorts, watching eddie behind you as he softly throws his head back and releases a long ‘fuuuuck’ as you swayed your hips gently against his crotch. he rubbed over the globes of your ass, teasing his fingers at the hem of your shorts.

“i can’t believe you’re bent over like this for me,” he says as he removed his black shirt and stepped out of his sleep pants, only leaving the fabric of his boxers strained against his hard on. you felt it in the kitchen, and you feel it even more now pressing against your ass. you whimpered a little, trying to rub against him until he gripped your meaty hips and stilled your movements.

“you gotta be good for me, okay baby? let me take my time,” he cooed, rubbing over the wideness of your hips and ass as he met your eyes in the mirror. he lingered his fingers around your waist band and slowly tugged your shorts down, leaving you completely bare, and leaving eddie feeling like he could cum just from the fabric of his boxers rubbing against his tip.

“no fucking panties?” he questioned, standing back up as he stared at your bare ass, moving your cheeks to spread and reveal both your holes.

“i, i forgot,” you lied, looking at his body through the mirror. the only light that’s shining on the both of you is the orange hue from the street lights in your neighborhood, the shadow of your window blinds casting on eddie right now. you liked the way his pale body looked under that glow, the way his patch work tattoos mixed together well, some looked lighter than others and the bigger ones were more complex. you wanted to inspect each and every one, know the meaning of them, why he got them.

“i know you didn’t forget, baby. you don’t have to lie to me,” he said and got on his knees to become face to face with your bare pussy. even though you were a little insecure about the way you looked down there, you tried to be as confident as ever just in case it wasn’t what a man was attracted to. you’ve met men who preferred skinny women, or men who didn’t like the way you looked down there because you were ‘too big.’

eddie’s hands gripped your ass and thighs firmly, spreading them as he pleased and watching the way your lips spread to reveal your wetness leaking out of you.

“fuck, fuck im so,” he tried to say but he was losing it. he was going feral at the thought of you being this wet and dripping for him, losing it at the fact he had you bent over naked for him, whimpering and moaning for him.

“is, is it too much?” you cringed inwardly at yourself, shutting your eyes and resting your face on your hands that are folded on the vanity.

“what? no what? too much, what do you mean?” he said, standing up and looking at you through the mirror, still gripping your ass.

“like, am i too, um, fat?” you asked. you knew how ridiculous you sounded, how insecure you sounded. but it truly wasn’t like that for you, you were worried more so about the fact that eddie wouldn’t be big enough to pleasure you. you weren’t much of a size person, but if you wanted to ride someone it would be a bit hard to do that with someone who was 5 inches, for you at least.

“what the fuck? absolutely fucking not, oh my god, baby you are so fucking sexy. i’m literally drooling over this pussy, please i need to ruin you,” he begged, slapping your ass a bit and kissing over the sting. his kisses led him to your inner thigh, and moved his lips to kiss over your wet pussy lips that were pushed together by your thick thighs, and you sucked in a breath as you felt his tongue slide up to collect your slickness, and moving in between your lips.

“eddieee, fuck eddie what are you doing,” you asked as he moved his hand to use his middle and ring finger to rub gently over your cunt, spreading your pussy lips and letting his tongue find your clit swiftly, sucking and slurping as you spread your legs a little more.

“i’m eating this pretty pussy,” he mumbled against your cunt, going back to wrapping his lips around your clit as he licked and sucked, sending you to bite your arm to shush yourself. you saw the way he gripped your ass with his other hand, felt how he kept slapping at your skin, spreading one cheek as his other hand was finding your hole with his fingers.

“fuck, fuck eddie please, please make me cum,” you begged, squirming and moving your legs as you tried to grip the table itself to keep from thrashing. it was so overbearing, the fact that he was so handsome and sexy, and he was buried in your cunt.

“mmmm, baby,” he hummed against your folds, making you jolt and cry a bit. he removed his lips with a pop, letting his tongue lick up your juices on his lips, and watching as his fingers sank into your tight hole. his mouth practically fell open as he watched you stretch around his digits, and watching your eyes through the mirror roll back and your mouth open.

“that feel good baby? am i making you feel good?” he asked against your thigh, pumping his two fingers in and out of you as your breathing started to pick up, your back arching against the table.

“fuck baby, yes yes it feels so good, please don’t stop don’t fucking stop eddie,” you begged, reaching your arm back to grab at his head and pull him back to your cunt, making eddie even more excited at your neediness. he didn’t even realize how turned on his was until he found himself palming his cock through his boxers as you kept his head in place with your hand and rutted against his tongue and fingers. it was hands down the sexiest thing he’d ever felt, letting you use him to get yourself off and grind into his face, he was so desperate for you he found himself moaning into your cunt.

he was going crazy, and it wasn’t until he finally grabbed your hand and moved it so he could use the hand he was palming his cock with to spread your ass, and move his tongue from your clit to your asshole. he used your juices he collected with his tongue and spit directly on your hole, still letting his fingers pump in and out of your hole, but letting his tongue find his way between your cheeks.

“oh my god, oh my f- eddie, please don’t stop please fuck, i need it, i need you please,” it was your begging that made him feel drunk, the sound of you so desperate and so willing to do anything just so you can feel good, his mind was focused on you and only you. he actually forgot where he was for a moment, and let himself eat your holes out as he pleases.

“eddie, fuck i swear i’m gonna cum, please can i please cum?” he didn’t even tell you that you had to beg for your release, he didn’t even expect that you wanted permission, and now that he knows he doesn't want to give it to you just yet. he was loving the way you looked right now, how fucked out and desperate you looked, how sex just dripped from your pleadings.

“not yet pretty girl,” he said, his face covered in your juices and still, he wanted more. he moved his tongue back down to your hole where he decided to slowly add a third finger, letting his tongue trace around the way your cunt gripped his fingers.

“s’ too much, eddie please let me cum,” you felt the tears sting your eyes, and you didn’t even realize you were crying until you finally moved your head from the table and to look in the mirror, seeing your puffy eyes and red face, the tears leaking from your eyes. all you could see was the way his arms and hands were gripping your backside, yet the obscene slurping and moaning made it too intense for you to keep watching him devour you. you felt how his head shook and moved in your cunt, how his lips and tongue worked so beautifully on your clit, you even felt how the tip of his nose rubbed against your slit. it was so much, so overwhelming, you felt like you couldn’t breathe.

“tell me it’s mine, tell me this pussy is mine,” he said, moving his lips to kiss over your thighs again. you felt the way his fingers curved into you, hitting your soft spot that made you want to explode. your eyes couldn’t keep open, you felt like you were going cross eyed with the way you felt. never have you felt like this from getting head before, never felt so excited and so wet, you’ve never felt so needy the way eddie made you feel.

“eddie, it’s all yours, fuck it always has been, this pussy’s yours, please,” you cried, making sure you were only loud enough for him to hear.

“mm, that’s all i wanted to hear baby, cum for me, cum on my face,” he said and moved his lips back to your cunt, his tongue working feverishly now on your clit, sucking, grazing his teeth against your nub, licking and even using the fingers that were inside of you to replace his tongue and let his fingers work your clit.

“i’m, fuuuck, fuck i’m cumming, i’m fu-” you moaned, letting your body go limp on the table as your legs shook, your release coating his tongue and face as he kept fucking your hole with his tongue. you were practically biting down on your hand, his tongue still going and sending you into a spiral.

“baby, please, i can’t,” you gasped, begging him to halt. he finally releases you, the slurping and wet sounds no longer as he stood up and rubbed his hands over your ass while he pushed his erection into your wet cunt. he reached and grabbed you by your neck, pulling your naked body to his chest as he looks at your figure in the mirror. his left hand moves around your jiggly body, gripping at your tummy that bulges out slightly, squeezing everywhere and grabbing your cunt with his whole hand.

“this all mine, pretty baby? only for me?” he asked again in your ear, moving his hand to grip your tits and playing with your nipples.

“yes eddie fuck, please. make me yours? i wanna be yours,” you begged, your voice hoarse and weak, sounding completely different than your usual snarky tone. he couldn’t help but smirk to himself, having you like putty in his hands when the whole time you made him nervous.

his. yours. mine. the words eddie has craved to hear, he’s dreamed of cumming to you telling him you’re his. he’s wanted you for so long and here you are, all fucked out against his chest and still begging for more. he couldn’t help but move his boxers down to fall at his ankles, letting his cock spring free against your ass and quickly slipping it between your thighs, right against your pussy. through the mirror, you could see the tip of his cock peeking through your plush thighs, and watched as he fucked your thighs using the slickness from your cunt.

“fuck, this pussy’s so fucking wet for me, you want me to fuck you? maybe you’ll stop teasing me when i’m over here if i finally stretch you out, hm? what do you think?” he panted, enjoying the feeling of your thighs pressing against his cock, stopping before he could cum.

“please fuck me, i’ll be good, please,” you whined, moving your hand to feel the tip of his cock, feeling him buck his hips and hearing a low growl from his throat. he pulls you back with him, still pressed against his chest, even after you fall back on top of him when he decided to sit on your bed against the wall. now, he has your legs spread in the air with the back of your head pressed against his shoulder as he peers over your shoulder to watch you spread all for him. you can feel his hard cock against your asshole, seeing it over your cunt and moving your hips to coat his cock with your juices.

“uh-uhn, i’m not done,” he grumbled, keeping your legs spread and watching the way your pussy lips spread open with the way your legs were in the air, and how easy it was to access your clit and rub your wetness over your hole and clit.

he moved his hand to push his cock against your cunt, rubbing it between your fat lips making sure his tip hits right at the hood of your clit.

“can i suck it?” you asked shyly, you couldn’t help but moan at the size of it and seeing it rub against your pussy. “‘s so big,” you finished and he blushed, throwing his headback with a groan. he wanted to hear you ask him to suck him off over and over again, the way you sounded so small and shy about it, how you actually wanted to take him in your mouth. he'll definitely be thinking about that now.

“fuck, what i’d give to feel those lips right now, but not tonight baby. i need to be inside you, right fucking now,” he groaned and finally pushed his cock at your hole, feeling his tip intrude and slide in slowly. he wanted to try to get you used to the feeling of him stretching his way inside you, but slowly realized it was him who needed to get used to how tight your cunt sucked him in.

“oh my fuck, i could fuckin’ cum right now,” he groaned as he relaxed inside you, adjusting you on top of him so he could see better and you were better pressed against his chest. he could see everything from the way he’s looking down behind you, he could see your eyes fighting to stay open as he slid inside, and the way your legs squirmed trying to stay open.

“you’re doing so good for me, pretty girl, so good,” he praised, awakening something inside you. somehow, he made you want to do everything right to hear him tell you how good you’re doing for him.

“eddieeee,” you whined as you felt yourself sink onto all of him, watching your hips begin to move on his trying to fuck yourself on him.

“what baby? you need more?” he asked as he gripped your belly, loving the way it looked with your knees almost at your chest.

“harder, please,” you begged, throwing your head back to look up at him, just as he looked down at you with your eyebrows pinched and your mouth open. he smiles, kissing all over your face as he began to fuck up into you faster and harder, moving to watch your tits and tummy bounce with every thrust. he decided to take your legs and hold them open while still on top of him, slapping at your thighs and whispering dirty things in your ear. all you can muster out are occasional moans and cries, whining his name out.

“gotta be quiet sweetface, don’t need anyone hearing you moan my name for me like that, only me baby,” he groaned. you could feel the rumble of his chest against your back as you watch him slide in and out of you. you were cockdrunk at this point, so dumb and fucked out that you can’t form a coherent sentence.

eddie felt like he was losing himself in you, the way you squeezed your walls around him and cried out how big he was made him want to be more than inside you. he really wanted to crawl inside your skin and be with you twenty four seven, he wanted to be the piece of gum stuck at your shoe just so he’s near you. he was desperate for you in every way and it showed in each thrust.

“need you on your back, baby,” he grunted and slipped out of you, moving your body to be laying underneath him rather than on top of him. he moved your legs harshly, spreading them apart and slapping your pussy just to watch it recoil with every slap.

“such a pretty fucking pussy baby, can’t believe it’s all mine,” he said moreso to himself. he was rubbing up and down your thighs and belly with his cock rubbing against your entrance, watching you squirm and beg for him.

“i love your cock so fucking much, please fuck me,” you begged in a whisper, and he gripped your belly when he decided to finally slip back inside you, watching the way your tits were pressed together and nearly covering the bottom of your face.

“mm, fuck you’re so pretty like this,” he said as he brought his hand to your chin, his thumb rubbing over your lips as he slid inside you again, this time a little more rougher than last time. when he slid inside, you gave him the opportunity to slip his thumb in your mouth when you moaned softly, and you instantly wrapped your lips around his thumb and started sucking and licking on it like it was his cock.

he was in a trance watching you, and feeling your walls clench down on him at the same time. he couldn’t believe you wanted him like this, and how nasty you were for him, he kind of forgot about you being anyone’s sister.

you decided to bite down a bit on his thumb and watched as he winced, but felt the way his cock twitched inside of you. the pace he was going was harsh and rough, the sound of his balls slapping against your ass was something he didn’t even try to conceal. instead, his own groans and moans were getting a little louder, the both of your moans mixing together.

“eddie, it feels so good, fuck you’re so perfect,” you cried with his thumb still in your mouth and he leaned down, kissing your face and neck trying to reposition himself and angle differently. when he did, you could actually feel the air slip inside and the next thrust he hit, you and he both heard the sound of you queefing, immediately feeling embarrassed and wanting to cover your face.

“mmm, fuck she’s talkin’ to me baby,” he said in a smile while he kept pumping his cock in and out of you. you giggled and hit his chest, telling him to shut up and keep fucking you, trying to ignore the embarrassing noise your own vagina made.

“c’mon, she sounds so fucking good, so fucking wet for my cock, yeah?” he cooed, sending electricity down to your clit and making you arch your back. when you do, he takes the chance to catch your nipple in his mouth and nip and suck at it.

“fuck eddie, you’re filling me up so fucking good, s’full of you,” you tugged at his curls and kept his head on your chest, feeling the impeccable stretch of his large cock. it was so girthy, so long that you felt like you were being split in half. it was painful, and that made it even more pleasurable. the way the patch of hair above his cock was rubbing against your sensitive clit made you cry out, scratching and scarring his back as you heard his groans and moans become more visceral, harsher, and you felt the way his hips started to buck and stutter.

it was when he released your tit to meet your eyes, and wrapped his hand around your neck, gently squeezing—that’s when you immediately felt the tug in your tummy, your thighs and legs tensing as you watched the way he lost control inside of you. you felt even hornier watching his body form a sheet of sweat, his face contorting into pure pleasure, and you felt how his cock reached the deepest part of your cervix.

“fuck, look at that, creaming all over my cock, fuck princess cum for me, cum all over me, make a fuckin’ mess please,” he begged, kissing your lips, still being able to taste yourself on him from earlier. your hand went up to grab his wrist, beginning to buck your hips against his and feeling the burst of pleasure flood through your body, making your legs shake and your moans muffle against his lips. you were still gripping his wrist when he finally pulled back to watch you ride out your orgasm, and he felt like he could cum right then and there. your body was arching for him, aching for more of his touch, bouncing with each thrust, your body littered with purple bruises from giving you hickeys everywhere, how out of it you looked—he needed to cum.

“where do you want it baby? where do you want my cum?” he asked you, releasing your throat and kissing over the place his hand was.

you didn’t think about it for a minute. you wanted him in all his glory, you wanted every bit of him. you craved it for so long, that you’d be stupid not to tell him where you wanted it exactly.

“inside, please eddie, wanna feel you fill me up, need it,” your sentence was not correct, but it got the point across. you didn’t even have to make sense, the minute you said inside he was a goner. he pumped inside you a few more times before thrusting hard one last time, jerking and twitching inside of you as he covered his groans in your flesh.

“fuck, dude you’re so fucking amazing,” he breathed as his body collapsed on yours, his face shoved into your chest.

“did you just call me dude after you came inside of me?” you asked, making sure you heard right. it was funny to you, it was just so eddie.

he rolled over off of you, pulling out at the same time and laying next to you on his back.

“yeah, uh, sorry. force of habit,” he said sheepishly and turned his head to you, trying to read your facial expressions.

“can i clean you up? before i go, uh back downstairs. i don’t want dustin asking where i am just to find me with his sister,” he said and you rolled your eyes.

“he’s a big boy. i think he can handle knowing you like me.” you said and watched him.

“still. he’s my friend, i’d like to tell him on my own terms.” uou couldn’t help but smile, turning your body on your side to face him better and bring your hand to his face.

“you’re the sweetest, you know?” you said and rubbed your fingers over his jaw and stubble.

“i think it’s safe to say you’re the sweetest,” he said referring to the fact that he did very much in fact devour you whole on your vanity desk.

“i’m gonna shower, so don’t worry about cleaning me up. maybe next time, i’m a girl who likes a bit of aftercare.” you said and kissed his lips softly, softer than you did when he was inside you. he kissed back and reached to pull you closer, wanting more of you. you put your hand on his chest and pulled back, leaving him breathless.

“so, this isn’t a one time thing?” he asked as he tried to breathe normal again. the both of you sat up to gather your clothes and as he put them in, you stood up and walked to your dresser, grabbing a pair of panties, a shirt and some shorts not bothering to cover yourself as he gets dressed again.

the second he’s full dressed and standing, you walk up to him with your naked body still pressed against his body, and raise yourself up on your tip-toes to kiss his lips once more.

“i really hope not.”

[genericpuff]

WTs behavior sure is... *something* to watch as a latecommer. you've covered it all better than I can articulate but damn does it ever haunt that they've essentially tripled-down on Rachel as the winning racehorse, someone who's historically been the most "go girl give us nothing" (if not worse than nothing) of all their past bigshots even w/o the trust in the show sinking lower and lower day by silent day.

It's not a profound remark but I stand in the on going scene like "This is it? Your plan?" as they keep digging. They desperately need something new to have breakout popularity, but they can't do that if they don't take in new blood, which they won't because new blood is a risk, etc. And so the scene is damned anew.

look, off the non-existent record that is my shitposting blog, as someone who just spent half an hour listening to their recent conference call with Goldman Sachs... in my very humble opinion, there is allegedly a metric FUCKTON of copium being huffed and I don't think the Goldman Sachs rep even realizes how much he's being talked down to. It's actually fucking hilarious. And I'm just a dweeb on the Internet, I shouldn't be sitting here picking up on the condescending vibes for what they are throughout a meeting that talks about shit like investment opportunities and quarterly returns and advertising metrics but... let's just say, WT's CFO David Lee's statement, "...proof will be in quarters I release, and I'm humbled by the reaction to my Q2 release which, again, I have to say, I thought I over delivered every single metric... but here we are, and I just have to continue to post results I guess to help educate all of you on the business I think we have" is even more passive aggressive to hear than it is to read, soooo here we are. Like, the chirpy tone in his voice just makes me think of this:

and yeah at this point they're beating the dead horse that is LO harder than the critical community is because even the critical community has largely moved on with their lives and only talk about it casually with other critical readers; meanwhile Webtoons is seriously over here trying to sell people on LO as if it's still 2021 and they're not years late to the party 💀 Even that quote I included in my last post saying that Rachel got started "4 or 5 years ago"... Lore Olympus launched in the Canvas section in 2017 and then as an Originals in March 2018. It's been longer than 4 years, Mr. Lee, and at this point the amount of time that's passed since selling its TV rights to Jim Henson Company will exceed the amount of time it took to even complete the comic in the first place 😭😆 The time to capitalize on LO's success was when it was successful, not 3-4 years after the fact.

[ashlynnfall]

group project with jayce and vi - arcane x reader

summary: blurb about you being stuck with vi and jayce for a group project

tags: arcane fluff (because we deserve it after this show), no spoilers (but mentions of s2 scenes and characters), silly, stupid, reader insert, school au, no trauma au, hextech exists in this world, somewhat ooc vi and jayce

warnings: cussing

word count: about 2.4k

a/n: this is inspired by the current vi and jayce accomplishing nothing memes. i love that joke so much, so i decided to write a little story about it! also jinx remains as powder in this since no tragedy has happened. this is my first fic ever, so any advice on how to be a better writer would be greatly appreciated! thanks for reading, and i hope you enjoy <3

------------------------------------------------------------------------------it's your favorite class about your favorite subject full of your favorite people, so what could go wrong?

literally everything, apparently.

your teacher, mr. heimerdinger, announces a group project to the class. soon after, everyone chatters in excitement because you all like each other, so no matter what, you'll all end up with a good group. he starts calling names and organizing people into groups of three. as the options for your group narrow down, you look around to see who hasn't been called yet.

vi...ekko...ooh mel would be great for this, you think to yourself as you survey the crowd.

"mel, ekko, and caitlyn! you're a group," heimerdinger calls out, causing you and the class to frown.

"ugh, talk about unfair," one student murmurs.

"viktor, skylar, and elora, you're a group."

the options keep getting smaller, and as you look to see who hasn't been grouped yet, a horrible realization hits you. all that's left is you, vi, and...

no.

"jayce," heimerdinger says.

stop it now.

"vi."

this isn't happening.

to your dismay, heimerdinger calls your name. you turn to look at vi and jayce who are sitting next to each other, currently celebrating the pair up.

"hell yeah!" vi exclaims, raising a hand up to high five jayce. jayce enthusiastically moves his hand to hers-

and misses her hand.

seriously, how do you miss an unmoving target?

you watch as these bumbling fools try two more times before they can actually hit the high five.

you've got to be fucking kidding me.

jayce talis, the golden boy of the grade. he's a genius inventor with incredible ideas that will take him far in life. known to be smart and charismatic, most people would love to be grouped up with him for any assignment. as one of heimerdinger's star pupils, being his partner should be good news right?

wrong.

vi, the cool girl of the grade. she's not the most academically gifted person, but she does all of her work and tries her hardest to contribute to the group. she's known to be an amazing fighter and has a gift for making people feel better. rumor has it that caitlyn kiramman once went on a total rampage after losing her mother's expensive necklace. she was a raging asshole for a week, spewing mean things to anyone who stood in her way. vi was out sick for that week, so there was no one to console caitlyn.

when vi returned to school, she called caitlyn "cupcake" one time, causing her to switch sides immediately, reverting back to the sweet girl she's known to be. oh, and vi found the necklace too!

so a team up between a boy genius and a girl with a big heart should be amazing news. however, despite all of their incredible traits, when jayce and vi work together, all of that shit disappears.

they've been paired up together for projects before, and they're the only ones who love this match up. everyone else reacts in horror.

they're always onto absolutely nothing, cooking up plans and ideas that fail so miserably, it's almost impressive. during a lesson on hextech, they had the simple task of using a comically large hammer to aim and hit a target. the hammer was too big for vi to hold alone, so they used the power of friendship to hold it up together. they aimed for the target, and shot a blast.

it completely missed.

in fact, they missed so bad, that it ended up shooting through a window, resulting in it completely shattering. students had to dive for cover from flying glass shards. this prompted a severe tongue lashing from a very angry heimerdinger, who now had to pay for window repairs and do paperwork.

there was another time where they were sparring with some older classmates, got way too into the fight. they were in the middle of hyping each other up when a kid accidentally got in the way of their brawl. they totally knocked him on his ass, the poor thing got sent straight to the ground.

he recovered soon after, but he went home with a bloody nose the day of the impact. jayce was the one who dealt the punch, so he was wracked with guilt for the child he just injured. he sent the family some flowers as an apology, to which the mom responded with dead roses and a note saying: "eat shit".

he is not popular in that family.

knowing you're in for a disaster, you accept your fate, and walk over to a beaming jayce and vi. they are so excited to be partnered up with you, and it would be sweet sight if they weren't, well, them.

"this project is due next class, so please decide on a time outside of school to complete this. we have a lecture to finish," heimerdinger instructs.

vi offers her house, to which you and jayce agree. you're supposed to meet there about four hours from now, which isn't nearly enough time for you to prepare for the bullshit.

here we go.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

four hours later, you're knocking on vi's door, trying to calm your already spiked nerves. it swings open to reveal a small girl with two blue braids.

"hi!" powder exclaims as she wraps you into a tight hug. it's been a while since you've seen vi's little sister, and you're relieved to know that at least one person in this house has sanity.

the two of you catch up for a bit while you wait for vi to bring you upstairs. powder tells you about her little crush on ekko, rambling happily about their adventures while you laugh at their antics.

ten minutes pass and vi still hasn't come down to get you, so now you're annoyed. that annoyance quickly turns into concern as a loud bang from upstairs shakes the entire house.

what the hell?

you and powder rush upstairs to see what the commotion is about. nearly ripping vi's bedroom door off its hinges in fear, you two run inside to make sure everyone's alright.

you look at the scene with disappointment as you see dumb and dumber standing in shock, eyes directed to the damage they just created. there's a giant dent in the floor, no doubt made by the hammer in jayce's hand. vi's giant gauntlets are at her side, which leads you to infer that they were sparring before the impact.

jayce is always doing some type of extreme damage with that hammer, you facepalm as you take in the scene.

you give them both a withering glare then yell at their foolishness.

"you idiots do realize that we're supposed to improve the hextech, not destroy buildings with it, right?"

powder runs downstairs to tell uncle vander what happened, and you sigh in frustration while the other two carefully set their weapons onto the ground.

"sooo...we should get started on the project now, yeah?" jayce offers as his hand rubs the back of his neck, clearly trying to fix the mood.

you let out an exasperated sigh.

"yeah, let's get started."

vi and jayce add another disastrous duo moment to their record. you've lost count of all their failures at this point.

during the entire project, they say stupid ideas or do reckless things. jayce swings the hammer around with zero regard for his surroundings, and laughs whenever vi sticks up her middle finger in the gauntlets. whenever one of them says something that sounds remotely smart, the other one says, "EXACTLYYYYY."

"do you think if we wrap the hammer in foam, we can prevent it from breaking things?" vi asks jayce, who shoots her a look of disbelief.

"you can't be serious," he responds in a critical tone.

you nearly jump for joy as you watch their interaction. for the first time ever, there's hope that one of them will finally be smart in the other one's presence.

"we should wrap it in air pillows, not foam. regardless, that's a great idea! we should test it out," jayce enthuses as he reaches for the hammer.

your hope shatters into a million pieces, just like that window they destroyed.

"no, no, no, no, no!" you interject as you swat his hand away, preventing them from causing more destruction.

"what crawled up your ass today?" jayce asks, offended by your behavior.

"heimerdinger's foot definitely did because you keep screwing up on his exams. don't hate on us because you have a D in this class," vi insults as she completely airs out your business in front of jayce.

jayce yells "OHHHHH" in response, then goes to dap up vi for flaming you. putting your head in your hands, you practice deep breathing so you don't completely lose your shit. it's not your fault that runes and hex crystals are so confusing!

uncle vander stops by shortly after the argument to inspect the damage, loses his mind, then goes to call uncle silco for assistance. you, vi, and jayce continue the project and pretend like vander isn't infuriated with all of you. you didn't even do anything but you still get wrapped up in this mess.

halfway through the project, vi gets a facetime call from caitlyn, to which she immediately responds. if you had a dime for every time vi called her "cupcake", you'd be a millionaire.

things get even more annoying when jayce gets a facetime call from mel, who he also immediately responds to. your friends yap to their girlfriends while you continue working on the project, silently reflecting on how terrible your luck is.

despite their annoying tendencies and horrific performance as a duo, they're somewhat helpful during the project. jayce uses his hextech knowledge to create solid ideas for improving the weapons. the secret to getting him to be his genius self? tell vi she isn't allowed to speak or be in the room while he works. you gave the same rule to jayce when it was vi's turn to contribute, and she actually came up with solid ideas for weapon functionality and protection.

turns out, separating them is a brilliant idea. you mentally pat yourself on the back for your effective plan.

the three of you finish the project and decide to do a movie night in celebration. jayce and vi miraculously land a high five first try, which makes you smile. they then take turns giving you a high five, making your smile wider. the pair gets too confident and tries to do a complicated handshake, which per usual, goes terribly.

jayce accidentally smacks vi (how does this even happen?), and vi punches his arm in return. the two playfully duke it out while you pull out your phone to record them for your private story. you caption the video "mfs when they horrifically fumble a situationship".

when they finish the fight, you realize you can't be their babysitter anymore. desperate to not be stuck with the moron brigade, you ask to invite the rest of the friend group, and vi agrees, complimenting you for coming up with a great idea.

"it's pretty easy to have great ideas when you two are full of terrible ones," powder shouts from the kitchen.

even though vi is taller, older, and arguably stronger, she is always getting destroyed by powder in a verbal battle. it's what makes their dynamic so amazing. vi opens her mouth to shout something back, but you put your hand on her shoulder and shake your head, letting her know it's no use arguing back.

about thirty minutes later, you're sitting in the living room with vi, jayce, mel, caitlyn, ekko, viktor, skylar, elora, powder and her new friend isha, claggor, and milo. you all watch a comedy movie to unwind from the stress of the day, and soon become thoroughly entertained by the movie's ridiculous humor. jayce and vi throw popcorn at each other, which annoys everyone. knowing there was no stopping them, you and mel make a bet on who will win. you choose vi and she chooses jayce like a supportive girlfriend.

mel slides you a crisp five dollar bill halfway through the movie.

as you sit and watch, surrounded by your friends who are full of the happiness and light that they deserve, you decide that maybe a group project with vi and jayce didn't turn out to be such a bad thing after all.

the hangout is full of jokes, silly arguments, laughs, and unbridled joy. even vander and silco stop by to check in on everyone from time to time, smiling at each other as they reminisce about their days as students. whenever those two enter the room, vi and jayce's bodies go rigid with stillness, trying to attract as little attention as possible from the angry set of uncles.

it was an amazing night of bonding with your friends and basking in the comfort of good company. you make a mental note to plan more of these, hoping to give your friends the enjoyment they deserve. when the movie ends, everyone gets off the couches to clean up as they discuss their thoughts on the movie. vi approaches you with a big grin on her face, then has the audacity to deliver the following line:

"this was so fun, the three of us should totally be partners again!"

since you're in such high spirits, you consider giving jayce and vi another chance. maybe they aren't all that disastrous, and maybe, just maybe, they can prove to be a competent duo-

"totally! for our next project we should try seeing how powerful a hextech blast can get! maybe we should go to the park and shoot it into the sky?" jayce schemes while vi's face lights up in excitement at the prospect of another hextech hangout.

never mind, you roll your eyes and mentally chastise yourself for even thinking of giving this another shot. these morons couldn't find a way out of their own asses if they were handed a map.

you fervently shut down their plan before they try making any more.

"absolutely not."

jayce and vi are definitely going down in history as one of the worst duos of all time.

[ricksanchezbignaturals]

i rewatched s7e3 and the weird sort of straight washing that happened with unity was worse than i realized in my first 1 and a half viewings. so im here to be a little bit more of a hater lol.

okay so like fuck this bitch in particular

now, i understand that unity has appeared in the comics which i haven't read so it's possible there's some lore there that idk about, but here's the deal as i understand it and why this specific alien acting like the face of unity bugs me so much. this alien is part of a species that, as of the episode in season 2, was very recently assimilated by unity. so like im not sure why there's so much focus placed on her specifically. having her act as a representative of sorts made sense in the first episode, she was a president on the newly assimilated planet that rick and the kids were visiting. but like, that's it, right? it doesn't make sense to me why she would be any more important than any of the other, what? trillions of life forms unity has under its belt? like the only reason for her to be here at all is to be recognizable to the audience, which like, fine. i think it's a little dumb, but whatever. the problem isn't having her as a symbol (personally i think it'd be cooler to not have an entity like unity tied down to being primarily represented through one body but i digress), the problem is that she's treated like more than that in this episode.

this is a part i didn't notice until my rewatch that really irked me.

these are concurrent shots from the scene when rick shows up and starts spraying unity. we see it in virginia telling rick to take it easy through the body of this human, then we see it continuing the conversation from its spaceship in the body of the alien. i am like super not a fan of the implications of that. this alien is not supposed to be unity any more than any one of my cells is me, but here it's depicted as though whenever unity does something in any of its bodies, it's coming from this lady. and like, that'd be super lame even if it wasn't an obvious womanification of a nongendered entity.

now im no english major so i don't have an elegant transition to put here, but yes, it is time to talk about pronouns. yeah yeah, ik, trans person gets hung up on pronouns, bite me okay, it's relevant. i went back and watched the first unity episode to be sure id remembered correctly, and yes, in that episode nobody uses gendered pronouns for unity. morty says "they" which seems more to be referring to a number of bodies, and other than that, people mostly say "unity" or "it". as for the new episode i noticed rick using nongendered pronouns twice

but after that he goes with she/her for the rest of the episode

and yeah, i think that is pretty disappointing. i didn't catch that "it" until my rewatch, but the use of "them" did make me really happy but then everybody started she/hering it. the combination of all that emphasis being put on a female body and people calling unity she so much makes for an episode that manages to be significantly less queer than the one that came out in 2015. it feels weirdly cowardly after that "we're all a little gay" bit in the last episode and doesn't inspire much confidence in me regarding rick's relationships with nonwomen. like stuff can be gay if it's for a joke, but there's more money on the line now than back in season 2, so rick's ex lover needed straightening up.

idk. i still like the episode because im easy and focusing on rick's mental health and relationships always makes me happy, but man, i am certainly not happy with how they handled unity. they really did it dirty, watered it down to being pretty much just another alien lady.

(also to be clear, i am not trying to shit on the writers here. obviously idk exactly what went on, but im pretty comfortable placing the blame squarely on execs)

[snazzydwarf]

I watched Transformers One last night, and now that I've let it sink in over night I have some WORDS (In a positive way, this movie SLAPPED and I just wanna ramble haha)

I'll just be going over the main 4 however!

So Spoilers under the cut!!!

Okay straight off the bat I wanna preface that I'm not the most knowledgeable about the TF franchise, I'm more of a casual fan. I've seen some of the Bay movies, Bumblebee 2018, and a little of bit of a few of the TV shows. (I'm starting to read the IDW comics, but I'm not far)

So as a casual fan of the franchise this movie was EVERYTHING.

It's just so... refreshing to have a simple "friends to enemies" story line that doesn't try to get complicated. You can tell that the people working on the movie really fucking loved the franchise, and that they took the time to refine the movie.

Megatrons origin story is very believable and well paced, at time's I went "YEAH BEAT HIS ASS D" outloud. OOOOO AND HIS OPTICS CHANGING COLOURS SLOWLY IS AWESOME!!! I can't remember the exact scene (I have horrible memory) but there's this one frame of Orion standing up after being pushed away, and you can see D-16 standing up in the background behind him... and he's just covered in shadows, his optics are a muddy orange. No longer the bright yellow like they were in the beginning and UGG THAT WAS GREAT!!

Chris Hemsworth was actually really well cast as a young Optimus. I don't think he would suit a more war-torn and older Optimus Prime, however as Orion Pax I think he hit the nail on the head. He sounded young, hopeful and full of curiosity that it makes the broken friendship between D-16 and Orion Pax more impactful.

They spent the whole movie being at each other's backs, even when you can tell D was getting sick of his shit, they loved each other. D saying "I won't ever follow another leader" oof- and with his "the only person I can trust is-" being cut off short is GREAT foreshadowing.

At that point in the story I don't even know if he would have said Orion, or himself. Their bond is straining, tensions are rising high and they have hit a split road.

Elita I think, while not being as stand out as the other two, was pretty great in the movie as well. She had a more low-key character Arc, going from a stick in the mud looking for her next promotion, loosing it all because of Orion saving another bot (Jazz!!!!), being mad at him and willing to do anything to get back up the rank, having her whole world fall... and then finding hope within the last bot she would ever thought she would.

She is a figure head, someone who leads and gives commands, yet is bound and confined by rules and her superiors. I don't think she was every truly happy, but seeing Orion try his hardest and never loosing the spark of hope and bullheadedness inside him inspired her.

I believe that scene of her giving back the map to Orion was the first sign or her beginning to trust him, in addition to her not taking back the map later on.

OKAY NOW... BUMBLEBEE... well B-127 BUT MY LITTLE BEE!!

Oh you poor bastard, look at you! You're not mentally well honey, and the war has JUST started!!!! I really liked him in this film and I will defend him to the end.

Was he a little annoying? Yes. BUT it fits and it works. He's been alone for Prime knows how long, he's desperate for friends and companionship that he can't shut up now that finally, finally he has someone else to talk with.

I liked his jokes throughout the film, sure others can find it annoying (god knows the D, Elita and Orion kinda did) but underneath all of that is just a profound sadness.

You can see this when D-12 is standing up to Sentinel, he tells D to stand down, to kneel. Because he's afraid, he's afraid he's gonna watch as one of the first friends he's ever made be killed right in front of him.

He's also not as dense as other's think he is. He may be optimistic, loud and ever the chatter box who lacks the social ques of someone who's been alone for far to long, but he knows when to calm down. He was quiet when they found the bodies of the Primes, he was the one who had the Energon cube to give to Alpha Trion and he did that in a quiet and careful way cuz he knew that this was serious.

He doesn't crack a joke when they see the demise of the Primes and Sentinel's betrayal cuz he's also as shocked as the others. He's NOT an airhead, he's many things in this movie, but he isn't dumb. (also without him, legit nothing the movie was even possible, cuz he was the one who saved the SOS message of Alpha Trion and he was the one with the Energon cube... I'm just saying-)

Anyways, this was a great movie! If you haven't seen it (just spoiled urself mate lol) then please go watch it in the theaters if you are able to. It would be such a shame if this were to "flop" and we never got to see a sequel to this time line.

more thoughts in the tags cuz this has gone on long enough!

[devilheartsblog]

I watch World of Winx,this is what I have to say about Season 1

Before anything I’m considering WoW it’s SEPERATE CANON. No Alfea, no Dragon Flame, no Black Circle, no Earth Fairies. But I will touch on the connections to the show in a later point.

Let’s start with the things I like. The concept is alright, I was doubtful but after watching the show it made more sense. Some new characters like the talents, Ace, the Queen and Shaman were fun and I like the variety for the talents. Roxy was quite enjoyable too (until she went on a mission with Bloom and it felt like she was her apprentice again despite them seeming to be the same age). The way the Winx use their powers outside of battle was refreshing and it’s nice to see how they can read different auras, and I love Aisha using water, I just like elemental magic a lot so yea. I also quite liked Bloom arguing with ace and the build up to her getting fired, but the toupee thing was stupid.

Now the things I don’t like which there is a LOT. So brace yourselves guys. There are a lot of plot holes such as Bloom not revealing her fairy form to Jim but Naoki (the talent geek) is okay because I guess he likes comics?? Also Detective Evans and Gomez aren’t a main focus despite being important, and it’d be more interesting if they were Anabelle’s friends as her flashback shows a blonde woman and brunette guy. Some other plot points are references to Winx Club such as Bloom coming up with the name, the girls only being on Earth for months, and Roxy and Bloom having relations outside the club. Which, guys girls and nbs, makes me wonder WHERE THE FUCK ARE THE WIZARDS? Ogron get yo ass over here and capture Roxy you stupid f- It seems like the show wants to be its own thing but has to be like “hey remember they’re the Winx Club” which makes even less sense. There’s also the travelling problem with how going from Paris ro Beijin is a van drive away and Beijing to London is a 2 minute walk. And going from California to Switzerland is just around the corner. Makes you wonder how Jim got to all those places so easily.

Other than that Crocodile man was annoying past the 3rd episode, like please someone turn him into a purse. And while the Winx use their powers in unique ways outside of battle, in battle they suck hard. Flora uses the same vine spell on Crocodile Man 4 TIMES, is she stupid? And honestly a lot of the plot feels dragged out because of the battles if you ask me, especially Crocodile getting away with the watch about 3 times.

I’m dedicating Dreamix to its own section because where do I start. First off, I don’t like the designs. The outfits are too glam for battle and the wings are so over-detailed it’s gross and would be better fit for a live action effect. The transformation sequences are also pretty bad. The girls just sit around as magic dust gives them accessories, which just makes me miss season 1-4’s transformations. And the way they earn them is so…like why bother showing them earn it? Dreamix just happens out of nowhere, they didn’t do shit why should they get Dreamix? At least Mythix and Butterflix are earnt.

I think I’ll stop here otherwise the post will be a bible’s testament worth of complaints. Show’s okay. First half of season 1 was good but then someone invited a season 4 writer and now everything’s about Bloom. So yeah, see you guys on the flipside!

[evilwickedme]

This wasn't asked for because nobody in their right mind would ask for this but this is a fic rec list of fics I cannot stop rereading

Just started yet another reread of Inimitable Verse by deniigiq and I fully plan on rereading their into the multiverse series which occasionally crosses over also - this is a Spider-Man/team red focused series, think comics canon infused early mcu-spidey since only homecoming had come out for a non substantial amount of time they were working on the series and the daredevil stuff is explicitly tv show AND comics. Also the multiverse series is how I got into Murderdock and therefore how I got into Spider Gwen

Unpretty's Sorrowful And Immaculate Hearts series which is just a loosely interconnected series of DC fics. My personal favorites are Empty Graves, in which Martha Kent keeps killing time travelers trying to kill baby! Clark; any of their clois fics but especially Third Wheel; and Anti-Social, which is a social media fic mostly about Tim and Bruce that made me cry laughing. Catch Bruce trying to get Walmart's employees to unionize. Also shout out to unpretty's only fic with Jason in it, it looks awesome but is tragically incomplete

This particular Reverse Robin AU which put in the work to reverse every single younger generation and is chef's kiss I LOVE this version of Tim he's wild

Both of Shoalsea's fics are in constant rotation for me I talk about Into The Brighter Night all the time in the tags of reblogs and stuff it truly lives in my head rent free. Anyway Tim gets kidnapped by aliens and the batfam have to watch as yj98 saves him and it's angsty and funny and such a good take on what could have been if the new 52 hadn't happened. And Compassion Builds No House is about Tim and Pru from Red Robin. Ugh they're both so good

Speaking of Clois (I did you've just forgotten this by now) brilliant (like a confession) by kathkin (penny-anna on the hellsite) is so fucking good I'm. Okay. Anyway it'll be listed as inspiration if/when I finally post my two person love triangle fic for them

I'm too anxious to catch up on this before it's done but jumble sale chic is hands down the best spideydevil fic series despite and because of the omegaverse

Make A Little Birdhouse In Your Soul is my favorite take on Jason, period, and has a lot of fantastic Damian stuff going on too. It's updating every few weeks still! Sometimes more often! I love you bacondoughnut it's me JustGail the person who will not stop commenting on your fic you're stuck with me forever

I lied above Rumspringa Murderdock is what got me into Murderdock but that series is second place. I found this one while scrolling through the tv show's mattfoggy tag, thinking I was safe

Speaking of Murderdock mattfoggy, The Lawyer All the Wickedness was written early on in spider-gwen's history and so diverges from canon really early in ways that I think are super interesting and creative

Oh also straight on 'til morning by merils (Tumblr url mamawasatesttube) does SUCH a great job unpacking Kon's trauma and building up healthy relationships around him including a budding timkon romance and yeah it makes me sad and happy at the same time

We're getting into poisonivory territory so just trust if you like the pairing and poisonivory is writing it you'll like it. Ok rapidfire

Like A Handprint On My Heart mattfoggy soulmate au with a twist

Will You Still Love Me Tomorrow? Damijon future fic/au. Jon came back from the future when both of them were 19. Demisexual!Damian at its best. Damian's terrified of being abandoned by Jon again and it made my heart hurt

I feel like I've already recommended every JayRoy fic by poisonivory and genuinely I do reread them all, sometimes in order of publication if I'm in a particular mood. Maybe the one I've read most though is I've Got the Feeling You're the Right Thing After All which is about Roy and Jason starting a fwb thing while Roy still harbors old feelings for Dick. Can't see anything going wrong here lmao

Mmm this post is long enough so I'll leave it at just superhero fic for now but I do in fact have the ability to do a whole post just for the Witcher or Leverage so I might do that. Anyway thanks for following me on yet another burst of insanity it will happen again

[rius-cave]

Disguise AU

How and when would their first real date be like??

Or would they even see eachother after that hot night?

My thoughts are that Adam would wake up completely hangover either in his couch or either in an hotel room -though I doubt they would go THAT far the night they met- with a note next to him, it has a phone number and says ‘Call me handsome’

See, I think my answer is heavily influenced by something I read or watched once (probably some yaoi manga idk) but I don't really remember what lol, here's what I think:

They absolutely had sex the first night. If it had just been some heavy make out sessions, Adam wouldn't have freaked out as much skfkgksgd.

I think they probably start making out, then Lucifer, being just a bit tipsy, asks Adam if he wants to come to his hotel room. Adam, who is absolutely smashed, says yeah sure whatever just keep touching me. They probably do some hand stuff in the car because Adam literally can't keep his hands to himself and is drunkenly horny lol. And then yes, they go to Lucifer's hotel room and cut to black and all that.

Next day I reckon Adam had a freakout and storms out, leaving Lucifer very confused and also a tad disappointed and sad.

There's a couple days, maybe even weeks, with Adam just going back and forth with "WHAT THE FUCK DID I DO" and "holy shit that was the best night of my life" and "IM NEVER FUCKING DOING THAT AGAIN" until of course, he starts going down again lol, and if he's conveniently going to the same bar where he met the stranger each and every time, well... That's just a coincidence, promise.

However, Lucifer never shows up, leaving Adam feeling like an idiot for thinking it was possible to meet him again, he tries hooking up with other people, women, but it's just not as great.

Until of course one day he sees him there again, and debates another good 20 minutes if he should talk to him or not. He finally walks up to him.

He half explains himself on why he ran out, and Lucifer is understanding and says not to worry about it etc etc, they were drunk bla bla. Lucifer says he can't stay that night cause he has some business to attend to, but gives Adam his card and tells him to ring him sometime.

It takes Adam another good while to actually call him lol. I think they'd have a pretty normal date, though neither of them call it that. Can't really decide what they'd do for their date in this context, maybe Lucifer surprises him by going to a concert with VIP seats, idk, something that only rich people could do lol.

They have a great fucking time and connect really well, for a second Adam thinks, hey, this is not even gay! Maybe I was just really drunk off my ass! This guy is just fun to hang out with...... And then a couple hours later they're making out again and having a quick one in some alleyway or whatever lololol

Honestly, I could go on forever, but this is already long and if I keep going I'll end up wanting to make it a comic and I can't afford that right now LMAO

If you guys crave more from this AU, Dedmerath is going to be making a comic on her Patreon!! Go support her, she's super awesome!

[faru-itsok]

hi! and congratulations on having watched the new movie :) i'm curious, what are your top favorite dcmk movies and where would 27 rank?

HI! Thanks 🤗✨ and that is a difficult question 😅 hmm I will do a top 10!

So let's start!

1. Movie 27 “the million dollar pentagram”

Well after watching the movie it just moved right up the list, I just had to see Aoko there and it automatically became the best movie ever! Hahaha well it is a bit true, but the main reason is that the movie is entertaining, it had me giggling and shocked and then it had action and a bit of angst, it just worked so well I loved it!

2. Movie 19 “Sunflowers of inferno”

To be honest I would put these 3 movies as my seconds( 19, 26, 22), I really liked them so much, but I'm a huge Vincent van Gogh fan! I have been painting replicas of his works (not in an illegal way? Just painting for school projects, for me and gifts) since I was in middle school and when you combine my love for Kid and My love For art well… yeah it takes the cake 😅

3.Movie 22 “Zero the enforcer”

I had a hard time placing 22 and 26 i just find these are the best movies objectively speaking, they had a lot of action and are very quick movies, like there is always something happening and get your attention from start to finish, now 27 has that too and its why it jumped right above all XD. Now this one takes 3rd place because i just watch it more often, like when i travel or im bored and want to watch something exiting this is my go to movie along with movie 4 thats the only reason its above 26

4. Movie 26 “Black iron submarine”

As i said above this might as well be my second favorite as well, is a very well constructed movie, when I showed it to my family I actually said “this might be the best Conan movie in existence” to which my sister answered “because of Kaito Kid?” and when I said he didn't appear on it she actually felt curious enough to watch it and liked it. I really like the way things unfolded, had me focused the whole time and enjoyed it a lot.

5. Movie 4 “Captured in her eyes”

One of the best movies in my opinion! It has that quick peace that I like in movies and I just find it so beautiful!

6. Movie 14 “The lost ship in the sky”

This is other of my go to movies, it has that weird combination between action and humor that I love and I just loved the team work between Kaito and Conan

7. Movie 23 “The fist of the blue Sapphire”

It was a good movie! Don't get me wrong, I feel I should love it more, not that I don’t, is just it's not one of those movies I would seek to lift my spirits but the one I would watch to see just how cool Kid is and inspire me to write something😅

8. Movie 25 “The bride of Halloween”

I think the main reason this is even on the top 10 is because of Furuya Rei, I liked it a lot! Like most of the movies of DetCo but it lacked the sparkle? Idk I feel like I saw what was coming from the beginning but it was enjoyable. I loved the scenes of his past and Takagi acting like Matsuda 👌🏻✨

9. Movie 3 “The last wizard of the century”

It's just a classic you know? Like the whole story was entertaining, how Kid blew up a fucking power central just to find where the eggwas? the attempting murder on Kid, how he later saved Shinichi’s ass? It was glorious I really liked it but not as the ones up

10. Movie 20 “The darkest nightmare”

It's a great movie! I'm putting it down here because it made me love a character and then took it away from me so quickly that it makes me emotional when I watch it 😭😂✨

Wellp thats my top 10 is obviously based on my personal preferences and i tend to like the movies where Kid appears because it ads a bit to the comical area and the action (I have always loved movies with heists and thievery (not only kid and lupin the 3 ones)) so yep I hope you guys like this and i’ll be delighted to read your top 10 as well!

[bingbongsupremacy]

The Letter Pt. 3

Pairing: Ellie Williams x fem! reader

Warnings: She/Her pronouns used

Summary: Ellie and Y/N are in two very different social groups at school. One day when Y/N's crush is cruelly exposed in front of the whole school, Y/N is brutally shot down. Finally, five years later the two run into each other again.

High School AU

Pt. 1 Pt. 2 Pt. 3

*Not Proof Read*

A/N: Day one is bad. I didn't know what to do for the first day. I just wanted it to look awkward af bc it's supposed to be super awkward and tense between Ellie and reader. Guys idk how good this is. I feel like I had an idea but idk if I executed it very well. I kinda just ran out ideas for this story. Lmk what you think. Also sorry for not updating yesterday. I just started a new job and shit's wack. I feel like whenever I go to work my body insecurities get worse, ya know? Idk why. Maybe it's the uniform or whatever but I just feel shitty whenever I show up. Anyways, ya'll aren't here for my life story so here's what you came for.

Also I changed it to only three days bc I couldn't think of enough things for them to do.

*****

Day One

Trixie's. Must be a new business.

I don't remember it being here before.

A cool breeze brushes past me as soon as I walk in. The first thing I notice is the large bar in the back of the room. What I'd give for a fucking beer right now...

We sit towards the back of the building. A waitress is quick to bring us some bright red menu's. " I'll be right with you two in a moment. " She smiles before rushing off.

Ellie and I are silent as we scan over the menu's. I don't think either of us knows exactly what to say. I mean, what the hell are you supposed to someone who caused you so much pain?

Just one hour.

Ellie sets down her menu. " Hey so, there's a fair coming through town this week. Do you maybe want to go on Thursday? " She asks cautiously.

I glance up at her. Bad mistake.

Fuck she's hot.

" Um, " Fuck I don't know. Do I want to go? Fuck. " Sure. " I shrug, setting aside my menu. " I mean we've got to do something Thursday anyways, why not? "

The rest of the evening seems to drag on. Small talk is quickly overcome with awkward silence.

How the fuck am I going to do this for 6 more days?

_____

Day 2

Here we go again.

I pull into the movie theater parking lot. People flow in and out of the building, smiles adorning their faces.

I spot Ellie waiting by the entrance, cigarette in hand. " Hey. " I greet with a tight smile.

" Oh hi! " Ellie smiles, snuffing out the bud. " Ya ready? " She asks.

" Yup. " I mumble. In an ideal world both of us will end up disagreeing on a movie to watch and end up splitting up to watch our own show. I doubt it'll happen, but a girl can dream.

" What should we watch? " Ellie asks while looking through the movies. " Oh shit, the Savage Starlight movie came out. " She mutters, her eyes lighting up slightly.

" Wait really? " I glance over her shoulder to look. " I thought it was coming out next month. "

Ellie nods. " Me too. Should we watch it? "

" Sure. "

At least something good will come out of this.

" That fucking sucked. " Ellie blurts as we walk out of the building. " Whoever made that needs to fucking read the comics. "

" Oh my god, I thought I was the only one. " I sigh. " They completely ruined the plot. "

Ellie nods in agreement. " And Daniela Star...fuck what the hell did they do to her costume? "

I chuckle. " They sexified it. Like bro, just let a girl live without having to show her tits. " I roll my eyes.

" Yeah. "

There's a moment of comfortable silence. No tension. No anger. Just two people bonding over a comic series. For a moment I almost things feel okay.

" I don't know about you, but I'm fucking hungry. Do you wanna grab something to eat? " Ellie asks.

" You read my mind. " I nod, pushing myself off of the wall. " Where are we going? "

Ellie and I walk down the street to a small pizza joint.

" I'll have the cheese pizza, please. " I say after examining the menu.

" Alright, your total is $4.50. "

" I got it. " Ellie pulls out her wallet before I can speak. She hands over a five dollar bill. " Keep the change. "

" Ellie. " I shake my head. " You've paid for everything so far. I can't let you do this. " I try to hand her another five.

Ellie backs up shaking her head. " No. I told you I was gonna make what I did up to you. This is the least I can do. "

We quickly grab our food and head outside.

" This shit is the best. " Ellie mutters between bites. " I don't know why I haven't been here in so long. I used to love this place as a kid. "

" Marco slips something in his dough, I swear. " I agree. " I haven't found another place with pizza this good. "

The sound of crickets fills the air. A small click captures my attention.

" That shit's gonna kill you. "

Ellie shrugs, lighting up the end of her cigarette. " At least I'll die happy. "

I roll my eyes. " You'll die hacking up blood. "

Ellie's nose crinkles slightly. " Thanks for the visualization, dad. " She mocks slightly. " I only smoke when I'm nervous or stressed. "

I purse my lips. " Ellie Williams, are you nervous right now? "

Ellie doesn't respond. Instead she takes a deep breath.

" What happened to you, Ellie. " I ask genuinely curious. " You used to be... "

" Perfect? "

" I was gonna say an asshole. "

Ellie chuckles. " I grew a fucking spine. I ended up cutting majority of my friends off and dropping out of college. Now I sell weed and work at a supermarket. " She says nonchalantly.

" Definitely a big character change. "

Ellie grins. " Speaking of weed. " She pulls out a blunt. " You ever try one? "

" Of course. "

Maybe tonight won't be so bad.

-----

Day 3 (Thursday)

" I will win that stupid bear if it's the last thing I do. " Ellie huffs in frustration. Her face hardens in concentration as she tosses another dart at the dart board.

" You really don't need to, Ellie. " I grin at her 20th attempt.

Ellie doesn't respond. A small alarm goes off as Ellie finally makes the final dart into the center of the board. " Fuck yeah, baby! " She cheers. " Told you I'd do it, Y/N. "

I roll my eyes. " Yeah yeah. "

Ellie accepts the large stuffed bear from a game operator who's obviously very annoyed with us. Yeah, we've been here a bit.

" Here, this is yours. " Ellie hands me the large brown bear.

" Are you sure? You spent like 40 bucks trying to win this thing. "

Ellie takes a sip of her beer. " It was worth the smile on your face. Keep it. "

The past couple of days have been...unexpected. I came into this fully expecting to hate Ellie when I leave.

Now I'm not so sure.

We make our way to our last ride of the night; The Ferris Wheel.

" God, Jackson looks beautiful up here. " I sigh while peering down at the bright lights.

Ellie hums in agreement. " It's a nice breather from the world. I feel like I can just...be. "

" It definitely is. " I glance over at Ellie.

She looks back at me. Her smile slightly falters. " I guess this is it. "

It's the third day.

Have I forgiven her? I'm not sure. On one hand, I don't feel like she's the same person. On the other hand, how can I be sure. I mean, I haven't been here in five years. She could be lying for all I know.

" I'm not sure about you, Ellie. I don't think three days is enough time to fix what happened. "

Ellie nods, gaze dropping to her lap.

" But I'd like to get to know you. "

She head snaps up. Confusion flashes across her expressions. She obviously wasn't expecting me to want to talk to her after this.

" Maybe I can...stay a little longer. "

A grin spreads across Ellie's features. " I'd like that. "

" Well then. To new beginnings. "

" To new beginnings. "

I don't really like this last chap. I might remake it if I can come up with some ideas for it. Hopefully some of you guys still enjoyed it.

Tag list (Sorry if I missed you): @octavias-next-meat-bite @ximtiredx @gold-dustwomxn @3lliesrifle @mokeysthings @mqddieas @elliesinterlude @ashlqyy @villainousbear

[meraki-yao]

That question was super serious im trying to figure out what's going on, love that taylor got all that exposure but it was a bit surprising, Im from a super homophobic country (illegal/death penalty type homophobic) and china is probably more progressive from where i stand but by western standards its still a lot conservative. So it was odd that an actor who's only popular in certain groups for playing a queer character is getting hyped up there.

Heads up, I went on a rant lmao

I agree. And I was really freaking anxious the whole time he was there because of it.

Okay, for those who don't know, here's the thing about LGBT+ in China. And I'm only gonna talk about the sexuality aspect because the gender aspect is a whole other topic and a lot less progressive than the sexuality side (that being said trans lives matter)

The official stance promoted by the government, ergo the public, is condemning it. Thankfully not in an illegal/death penalty type, but more in a "if we ignore it and don't talk about it, it will go away" type.

There were a couple of years I think in the mid-2010s where significant progress was being made in terms of both representation (see shows like Guardian, the Untamed, Word of Honor) and pride organizations and support (see Shanghai Pride)

But starting in mid-2021 the government suddenly cracked down on queer representation. "Effeminate" men were publicly condemned and called "sissy" BY THE OFFICIAL GOVERNMENT NOTICE (I was fucking fuming when I read it). Dangai (BL, or simply, adapted from gay novels) shows were banned. Multiple LGBT+ organizations were shut down without explanation. And just this year, when a singer with a famous song about being an LGBT ally supporting the community held a concert in Beijing, anyone with anything remotely resembling a rainbow was banned from entry and had to hand in the rainbow object, even if it was their clothing. And those stuff were never returned. The older generation, such as my parents' generation, condemn it. It's not an optimistic sight.

But here's the fucking truth: queer people, have always existed, and always will. So actually, younger people, I'd say 30 years old and younger, the vast majority accept queerness. Gay couples are sharing their lives on Bilibili. Danmei (explicitly gay) radio dramas, novels, and comics are still being produced and consumed. There are so many people watching Western gay shows and movies such as RWRB as well as producing gay fan content. And honestly, part of it is due to the shipping culture here (which is a whole other topic I can write a dissertation on).

Either way, what I'm trying to say is regardless of whatever the "official stance" is, the demographic that's active on social media is accepting of it. Which is why RWRB could gain such popularity in China.

As per my last ask, I think the main reason for inviting Taylor is his willingness to try things the local way. A lot of times Chinese capitalists/executives don't really care where the star got their fame from, they just care that they are famous.

The difference with Taylor is that actors in China of a similar level of status locally to Taylor and who have been in queer productions don't talk about it after the promo period is over. If anything, gaining fame from being in a Dangai is kind of considered shameful. In fact, they actively avoid it. Taylor is of course, more than willing to talk about RWRB. In fact, during the videos, live streams and stuff, I was actively observing if RWRB would be brought up by the Chinese side/host. It wasn't. During the Little Red Book livestream, despite basically everyone in the live chat spamming RWRB comments, Taylor was the one who said "Oh I see talk about RWRB, what do you want to know?" And I understand that there are several potential reasons why RWRB wasn't brought up by the host, including time constraints, pre-set questions, pre-set agendas etc, but latent homophobia is also a potential reason.

Either way, yeah. I don't really know what the conclusion of this ramble is but here you go 😅

[somuchcoffeeandwine]

All right, fellow MCU fans

So, after seeing the Marvels today, it got me thinking. Now, you probably don't know who I am. But I do happen to be a writer. Not a very good one mind you (several people would say otherwise, but shush, give me my self-loathing) Phase 4 (and the current parts of 5) is not that great. So I want to rewrite the Multiverse Saga. Yes. The entire thing. Even though it's not finished.

Very long blocks of text below. It's really the only thing that keeps me organized. Please read it though if you are interested. It'll be split up into sections, for somewhat easy perusal.

Now, I know this is an ambitious project, and one not done. I am no stranger to things like this, see my own game/show I'm making. (This is the only time I'm going to mention it. But I am pretty proud of it) So, for my very small amount of sanity, I'm stopping it at The Marvels, and Loki season 2 (Oops, still not finished with it yet). And I wanted to ask people what they thought was lackluster, or mediocre. Not the Marvel I and many other people grew up on. I do understand that it was flawed before, but when I recently rewatched most of them, I found that my childhood love for them had blossomed into something new. I was 6 when the first Avengers came out. I learned how to shoot a bow because of Hawkeye in that movie. And I think it deserves better, especially after watching the Marvels.

Now, this means everything after Endgame. So from Black Widow to The Marvels in terms of the movies, and the Disney+ series from Wandavision to Loki Season 2. I have a feeling it's going to take me a second to get through the remaining 5 episodes of Loki S2. My family wants to watch it with me, and they're all decently busy... Anyways, that's 10 movies, and 9 series. Although I don't accept Secret Invasion. Like at all. Anyways.

I have yet to decide what I'm going to publish this on. Probably A03, just because that's easiest for me. And I can organize much easier. Do let me know what you think.

So, before I get into the problems I've identified, feel free to stop here, and reblog or ask me your problems with the aforementioned shows and movies. I'm talking writing or character problems, as we've seen in the series. I am a fan of the comics, but you can divert from that, or stick to them.

Oh, and if you say something like "Make it more queer", I am a raging bisexual enby. I will already be making it queer as fuck, and can be convinced to ship pretty much anyone, if I can get a good reasoning behind it. Minors should be shipped with only minors. That's one of my few rules, if you send anything to me. So yeah, I'm doing genderfluid Loki.

Thoughts on everything:

This is just here so that I don't get a ton of repeats. I'll go movies first, then the TV shows.

Black Widow (2021) - Honestly, this is too late of a movie. Natasha deserved this before Endgame or Infinity War came out. But release dates aside, Taskmaster needs more screentime, and a chance to show how menacing they are. Natasha also needs more time with her family, and the parents need to be fleshed out a bit more. Belova is far too smart to be tricked by the lady in the post-credit scene.

Shang-Chi And The Legend Of The Ten Rings (2021) - I don't have any major problems with this movie. The Great Protector, or the dragon, and the supernatural creature, I think he's called Dweller In Darkness, kinda felt a little blank, and the Dweller shouldn't have died, only been pushed back. And I don't like Katy that much. Trevor is much better comedic relief in my opinion.

Eternals (2021) - Oh boy, where do we start with this one? You know it's bad if I can't remember any of the main characters names besides Ikarus. And that's because I was laughing my ass off at him throwing himself into the sun. There was also the Celestial I think it was? Anyways that thing broke islands up, and then just became a massive statue, and like no one mentions it? I don't remember much else about this movie, even after having watched it like 3 times. Oh, and the Ebony Blade was shown off. I like that if they can do something fun with that.

Spider-Man: No Way Home (2021) - Dr. Strange feels a little shoe-horned in. The whole sanctum being overtaken by snow was pretty clever, but Strange being a father figure to Peter is not super well established. Could be fixed with a couple of rewrites. Or Strange and Stark being together. Peter is a dumbass, and the reason for him starting the whole plot... is so dumb. I understand, teenagers can be stupid, hell, I go to public high school, but Peter's shown he's a lot smarter than this. But I do like the crossover (Dafoe as Green Goblin my beloved) and the fact that the other Spidermen get to say goodbye in one last movie. Anyways, Ned's wizard connections need to be elaborated on as well.

Doctor Strange: Multiverse Of Madness (2022) - Alright, getting my biggest problem out of the way first. Wanda's corruption arc should have been shown. It should have been developed through the movie, and Wanda should have been with Strange and America. She can still be evil, and die after she realizes her actions, but this basically destroys the point of Wandavision. She was willing to say goodbye. Wanda has been a favorite of mine for years, and I read her comics religiously as a child. We need to see the power of the Scarlet Witch. What it did without Wanda. Her "No More Mutants" line sent chills down my spine the first time I read it. Sam Raimi directed this movie. Strange and Wanda should have had more horrific shit. And that one Strange with 3 eyes should have been the one from What If. We need horror in this. America also needs to be more fleshed out. I do love her, but we get like one scene of her being traumatized of basically growing up nowhere. Her moms get to stay though. I'm just going to ignore the last post-credit scene, because... that's setting something up I'm not sure of.

Thor: Love & Thunder (2022) - First up, Gorr has a great setup. He needed more screentime though. We need to see more of his god killing. They should rightfully be shitting their pants over this man. Thor leaving to save Sif was a good move, but that joke ruined the tension. She should have died there, proof of the god killer. Jane Foster is perfectly fine, and her arc is a lovely send-off. I would have loved some more stuff about the kids, especially Heimdall's. I don't even remember his name. He should have been shown doing something in Jane's return to Asgard, something that showed off his parentage. The meeting of the gods is a great scene, but there should have been people who spoke up, and then promptly getting thrown out, or even getting killed. Even more of a reason for Thor and crew to convince him. I think everything else is pretty good. Also Valkyrie is perfect in this movie. Bi queen. And her Loki knives are lovely.

Black Panther: Wakanda Forever (2022) - I actually think this one just needs a couple of little tweaks. I understand why they couldn't have T'Challa show up in the spirit world, and Killmonger was great, but I still think something between the siblings would be good. Fuck, I love the funeral scene. It was a lovely sendoff to both T'Challa, and Chadwick. Namor seems a little rash though. Might just be the comics leaking through on that matter but I do like the Mayan inspirations in the movie!

Antman: Quantumania (2023) - I'm not really sure on this movie. I don't like Janet in this movie. She feels too secretive. She could have told them plenty, even lied that Kang had gone home. He'd gotten out somehow. Kang didn't seem scared enough of the others, but that might just be me thinking of that. Oh, and MODOK sucked. He shouldn't be a joke. But Darren could have done something else, because he is in there.

Guardians of The Galaxy V.3 (2023) - Perfection in every way. I'm not changing anything unless it involves getting everything I'm incorporating in. And the Christmas Special is also great.

The Marvels (2023) - Spoilers! Kamala needed more screentime, she just generally felt disconnected from the plot besides her bangle. And I also wanted a more menacing villain. That's been the problem with them recently. They don't make me think that they could actually beat them. I like everything else though. Flerkins were great as usual. I love these stupid creatures so much. That one scene was beautiful.

Now to the shows! These are going to be so much shorter.

Wandavision (2021) - I think this is good. No notes.

Loki S1 (2021) - Good, besides the Sylvie/Loki romance. They are siblings. I'm not sure if there's anything else that I really had a problem with. It's been a moment. Which is a shame. I love Loki (Also bi confirmation! I love it!)

The Falcon & Winter Soldier (2021) - I also think this is good, besides maybe having some problems with the villain. Bromance all the way.

What If...? (2021) - Also pretty good. Little self-contained story. I like the zombies.

Hawkeye (2021) - I also think this one's pretty well written. Macaroni is constantly referenced in my house. Lucky is also a pretty boy.

Moonknight (2022) - Honestly, god tier. Anyways, no one mentioned the stars literally turning in Egypt. But maybe it was just the people thinking that they were drunk as shit and seeing something.

Ms. Marvel (2022) - Second favorite being Moonknight. I also don't remember anything glaringly wrong.

She-Hulk: Attorney At Law (2022) - Besides the tone of the show being inconsistent as shit, I think this show should have dove into some of the topics it brought up more. It just seemed a little surface level. Maybe a WWDITS style mockumentary would work better.

Secret Invasion (2023) - THIS ENTIRE SHOW SUCKS ASS. THIS WHOLE THING WAS DONE SO BADLY. I am not taking anything from this show

Loki S2 (2023) - Too distracted by another season 2 coming out, so I have yet to finish. I have heard it's good though. I've seen the first episode, and it's going pretty good so far.

Well, you made it to the bottom! Yay!

...This took me an hour to write. I did get the doc set up. And got a bit of an outline set up.

[oatmealdaydreams]

To Swear on the River Styx

First fic ever in this fandom, and it's a crackfic.

Taglist: @amazon-me-bitches @yourchemicallyimbalancedromance

Pairing: none, gen

Trigger/Content Warning: major spoilers, uncensored cussing, alcohol, drinking, sexual humour, crude humour, threats of violence, cringe

Description: Hades managed to break Homer's entire reality in half. Turns out a fellow college student tears Hades' reality in half, as well.

And Hermes really needs to stop flirting with everyone before Hades sends him to the Afterlife himself.

Extra: I wrote this in one day. I apologize in advance for any and all errors. It's unedited. Also, Lesches Dichter is my own original character. I claim all rights to them as I created them specifically.

[Masterlist] | ao3 link

[Read under the cut]

If you haven't had your mind broken at least once in college, then you haven't been to college long enough. 

One week. All it took was just one week, and Homer had his Existential Crisis for the term. Thanks to rooming with a literal deity- how the fuck did that happen- and said deity had little-to-no regard for mortals' minds. Hades; Lord of the Underworld, Greek God, one of the Big Three. 

One of the laziest, emo-tastic people Homer ever met. 

Speaking of Hades, he landed himself in a unique situation. He's stuck in a mortal body, in community college, and has to deal with godforsaken family. He's only seen one of them so far, and one is far more than enough. On top of that, he makes a wager- more like a deal, but whatever- with his mortal roommate. It's almost comical how it came to be. Homer wanting to be granted Elysium, a place for legendary heroes and mortals who managed to do cool shit. 'If I can show you one cool thing about mortals,' Hades remembers him saying, rolling his eyes at the memory. 'Then you will grant me passage to Elysium.' 

At such an absurd wager, Hades had even offered to escort the mortal there himself. If he wins, that is. He has high doubts that Homer could manage such a feat. Such a doughy mortal, the motherfucker. He'd hardly be able to handle a crocodile! Or even a boar! Do you know how easy those things are to defeat? Yeah, no way in all of the Underworld is Homer going to win this wager.  

Especially not with Hades' family running about the campus. 

Speaking of the Olympians-

Someone wrestles around with a group of frat boys, their laugh echoing from deep within their chest as they come out on top. Again. They're blonde, blue-eyed, and have a muscular build. They're generally tall with waves of hair tied back into a ponytail. Fitted in a tank top and ripped jeans, other frat boys are cheering them- him, if the cheers are right- on from around the field where they all fuck around. There's a plastic lawn table with red solo cups, most of which are either empty trash or filled with some sort of alcohol. A few of the guys not getting their asses handed to them are sipping away at their red cups. The mystery dude practically slams someone to the ground, and a loud set of cheers echo in response. 

Blonde, reckless, and worshipped by an entire fraternity? 

Oh fucking- that's Zeus, isn't it? 

Hades watches for moment longer, have been walking around campus to make sense of his dumb mortal classes and where they are, before he starts speed-walking as far away as he possibly can. In no way in the Afterlife does he want to get seen by his arrogant brother. That utter godly buffoon has enough shitass ego to last him an eternity. And Hades rather not deal with it, unless he absolutely has to in a can't-escape-this-mortal-badhell way. 

Isn't Hermes enough? Do I really need my entire fucking family to be here? 

Apparently, he does. As soon as he thinks he's far enough away from his accursed brother, he hears the unfortunate reality call after him. 

"Oh, my dear brother! Is that you, you introverted downer?" Zeus yells out, having noticed the grim aura from his fellow god. 

Out of reflex, Hades heads toward the nearest shadow and whooshes into invisibility to get away from him. He shadow-walks all the way back to his dorm, not caring if he doesn't find his classes for tomorrow. Mortal subjects are useless, anyway. Who needs math? 

Anything to get away from his brother. 

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

As soon as Hades pops back into the dorm, he scares the living shit out of his studying roommate. 

Homer jumps from his seat on his bed, almost knocking his highlighters onto the floor. He has a few notebooks out, pens and writing utensils, and a printed version of his class schedule all laid out in front of him. He seems to be preparing for the upcoming class week. 

"Right, that's something you do. I need to get used to that," he mutters to himself, though not unheard by Hades. 

Homer returns to colour-coding his different Gen-Eds as the resident Greek God simply ignores him and heads out to the joint living room. He watches Hades leave for a moment, raising an eyebrow at the silent departure. He dismisses it, taking it as Hades... well, being Hades. 

Mr. Emo-With-A-God-Complex sits and lounges around on the couch, trying to calm down from almost having to interact with his stupid family. In all honesty, he rather Hermes over Zeus. Don't tell them that. Zeus will go excuse-me-I-am-ZEUS-almighty-god-of-the-gods, and Hermes will take it as Hades actually liking him. Which he doesn't. Cause they're both absolutely aggravating on a good day. And most days aren't good, especially not with those two.

A knock on the door interrupts Hades' much-needed lazy time, and he groans audibly. He waits for Homer to answer it- he's a Greek God, why should he answer the door like a mortal commoner- but after a few seconds of nothing, no one answers. He gets up and heads to their shared room, very much annoyed, only to find Homer with some fancy contraption over his ears as he lightly bops his head to whatever sound it could be making. In reality, he's just wearing wireless earbuds. He's still sorting out his notebooks for specific classes. Hades rolls his eyes, walking off to the door. He answers it after the person knocks again, and he swings it open. He's about to curse whatever mortal dare interrupt him, stopping himself when he sees both Hermes and a random mortal student at the door. The mortal raises a judgmental eyebrow once they see Hades, but they stay silent as Hermes gasps. 

"Hades! You, answering the door? That's new," Hermes exclaims as if it's Greece's newest gossip. 

"What are you doing here, Hermes?" Hades is already considering whether or not to slam the door on him. 

"Oh, well, I thought I'd visit my favourite introvert. Plus, my roommate needed to find their cousin, or something." 

Upon hearing Hermes' voice, considering he's a god, Homer appears to the side of Hades. His earbuds are nowhere to be seen, but he does carry a notebook under his arm. A red pen is slotted behind his ear. Hermes' roommate looks to Homer, recognizing him immediately, and nods a hello. Homer sees the fellow mortal, apparently his cousin, and his face lights up. 

"Lessie! What are you doing here? Come in, come in," Homer says excitedly. 

His cousin makes a pointed nod at Hades. A silent question: what about him?

"Ignore him. He's a jackass at best," Homer answers, wearing a deadpan look. 

Hades sharply turns to Homer, "Excuse me, I am a god, you foolish mortal man-"

"See?" 

Hades' indignant sounds get ignored as Homer and his cousin wander off to the living space. Hermes snickers at his fellow Olympian as the two mortals start catching up. Hades turns back to Hermes with a glare.

Over on the couch, Homer sits next to his younger cousin. They wear a gemstone pendant, a blue lace agate on dark string. It's wrapped in a silver holder with a golden caduceus etched into the pretty stone. They wear a dark leather, spiked jacket with a dark blue shirt underneath. Their jeans are black and ripped, a chain hooked on one beltloop to another. A thin bracelet, made of beige and white thread, sits on their wrist. A bead with the capital letter 'H' is in the center of the bracelet. Rose gold-rimmed, circular glasses sit neatly on their nose. 

Homer notices the bracelet, and a thrilled gasp slips from him.

"Oh, you kept the friendship bracelet I made?" he says.

His cousin snorts at him.

"No, I threw it away. This is a copied clone of the weird-ass, coloured possession you made me. Totally not from when I was seven, and you insisted on making me a piece of jewelry," they speak in thick sarcasm. 

"Oh, ha ha, Lesches. It's nice to see you!"

"Nice to see you too, Homer."

"So, why are you here at Matthessy? I thought you were heading to Italy to study psychology."

"Ah, that... it kinda fell through last minute, so I had to look for somewhere else. Luckily, I just need to focus on my general education before my major classes need to be done."

"Aw, and you were looking forward to Italy. Well, that means we can hang out again!"

"Just glad I know someone here."

"Yeah, I know what you mean."

"So, why community college? Mom won't tell me shit nowadays."

"Aunt Karla still so private, huh?"

"Be glad you aren't her child."

"Heh, yeah... anyways, you know how I got that Chemical Engineering degree? But it went nowhere?"

"Yeah?" 

"Well, I decided to come back to college to make something of myself! But-"

"-you had an existential crisis involving the harsh reality of Greek Gods and the Afterlife being real?"

"...how-"

"-did I know? 'Mer, I'm a psychology major. I kinda figured once I saw your roommate is the literal God of the Underworld. Rooming with Hades ain't gonna be without a few crises here and there." 

"I forgot how perceptive you were."

"Eh, works well in my targeted career."

"True."

As the mortal cousins continue to chat away, Hermes and Hades are bickering at the doorway. Or more like Hades is bickering, and Hermes is enjoying messing with his introverted ass. Hermes keeps sneaking glances at Homer, being a flirty fuck, and Hades is two seconds from throwing him out a window. 

"Stop eye-fucking my roommate for two fucking seconds, I swear to Olympus-"

"Aw, you're no fun. It's funny how confused he gets when he catches my eye! Besides, I thought you didn't care about mortals? Had a change of heart so soon?" 

"No, you're just fucking annoying."

"Ugh-"

"Really, what are you doing here?"

"Oh, that reminds me! A letter from-"

"Oh, great Me, please not another cursed letter-"

"No, not that kind of letter. I checked."

Hades raises a doubtful eyebrow at Hermes as he pulls out a deep red envelop, sealed with a wax-pressed butterfly weed. The wax is a shade lighter than the flower, but not by much. Hades takes it and turns it over. The other side has nothing but his name written in golden, cursive font. Nothing is signed. There're no clues to who could've sent it. Just like when he blacked out...

"You're sure it's not another letter to knock me out? Nothing of Zeus' shit he likes to pull?"

"Nothing from Zeus. It just showed up on the front of my door, addressed to you, and a little note saying the contents were meant for your eyes only. I tried opening it-"

"You're a bastard."

"-but it seems to be... magically sealed. Some sort of blood seal, if Hecate still knows her stuff." 

"Oh no, she's here too-"

"I literally said we're all here."

"Are you sure she's not the one who sent it?"

"I asked. She said no."

"That tells me nothing. She could be fucking lying-"

"Plus, she has no reason to fuck with you. In any sort of way." 

Hades gives Hermes a tired glare. Hermes smirks. Hades rolls his eyes, moving on.

"Are all the others cursed with a mortal roommate, or...?"

"Oh, it's everyone! Mine hates me for some reason."

"I wonder why."

"They keep threatening to hurt me. Such a jerk. And they're so freaky. Made me question some things I rather stay in denial about..."

Hades highly doubts that a mere mortal could traumatize a literal god, but it's also Hermes. 

"Is yours also oddly named after a poet from our time, or is it just me?"

"Yeah, no kidding. Mine's name is Lesches Dichter."

"Yeah, Homer is no different."

"Weirdos."

"Fucking mortals and their fucking stupid names."

Or it's just because Lesches and Homer are related, but hey, the gods are stupid. 

Back with the mortals, Lesches stands as they read the time on the dorm room clock. Homer stands with them, offering a hug goodbye. They two embrace briefly, happy to hang out again after all those years. Blame Aunt Karla. 

"Alright, I should go before Hermes decides to flirt with some poor innocent again."

"Okay, about that. Is it just me, or does he... is he just really flirty?"

"Oh, he does that with everyone. Mostly with guys, as far as I know, but you're not the only one."

"Did he ever try flirting with you?"

"Right up until I threatened to cut his baby dick off, yeah."

"Oh god, you didn't-"

"He wouldn't shut up! I had to say something. Plus, I got a cool appeasement gift from it," Lesches says as they gesture to their pendant. 

"Woah, that's neat. Is that... his symbol?"

"And his 'signature gemstone' or whatever. He gave me it in exchange to try to not traumatize him again."

Homer pauses. 

"Wha- what did you do?"

"Just on my nihilist high. Nothing too extreme."

"That could mean anything coming from you."

"Well-"

"Lesches."

"Okay, okay. I might've, ya know, told him the reality of having a mortal body and how easily he could die and be forgotten and fade away-"

"Oh my god, Lessie!"

"What?"

"You can't just... why? Why would you do that?"

"It's funny."

"To what? Traumatize a god?"

"Yes, and I won't pretend it's not."

"Don't quote memes to me right now. You could get killed, Lessie! The gods aren't kind people."

"Eh, they're not that bad as long you traumatize them before they traumatize you."

Homer sighs.

"Besides, Hermes isn't the only god I've met."

"Oh, good god-"

"Persephone is close by my dorm, and she's pretty neat. Didn't even need to traumatize her." 

Hades, of course, perks up at the mention of his wife. Or whatever is going on between them right now. Hermes rolls his eyes at the Olympian. He leans against the doorframe as Hades walks over to the mortals on the couch, feigning indifference and crossing his arms. His face clearly shows anything but, though. 

"You've talked to Persephone? A mere mortal, really?"

"Funny, she didn't mention you, Hades. Maybe don't be an ass?" 

Homer just sits there, frozen in his seat as Lesches sasses a Greek God as if Hades were scum. They hear a quiet "ooooh" from the doorway, probably from Hermes. 

Hades scoffs, "I am a Greek God, an Olympian-"

"And I don't care, Mr. Nihilist-With-Boomer-Humour. Go sulk about your whatever-the-fuck where someone actually wants you. Maybe learn to treat mortals better, and then your beloved won't ghost you anymore." 

Hades is stunned to silence by this mortal's utter insolence. 

"Anyway, I should be going. Hecate said something about needing some ingredients for a spell, and I rather be on her good side. See ya later, 'Mer. Let me know if ya need me to kick some jerk's ass."

Homer nods a goodbye as Lesches heads for the door, equally stunned by his cousin's actions. To be fair, this is pretty on-brand for them to do, but still. Hades is already a prick enough. He doesn't need anything else to aggravate him. 

Unfortunately, Hades is still very offended as he turns and nearly stomps over to Lesches in a rageful fit. 

"You should be tossed into Tartarus for your disrespect! I am a god and should be treated as such."

Lesches turns to Hades right before they walk through the door. Both Homer and Hermes respectively watch as the angry tension thickens in the air. 

"You're right," Lesches says with a smirk, bowing as if to mock the god before them. "I apologize. Perhaps I shall make it up to you by sharing valuable information you'll need to get being mortal over with."

Hades stops for a moment, not expecting the apology. He doesn't realize the pure sarcasm that drips from Lesches' tongue like sweet poison, and he hums in honest consideration. 

"Since you seem so eager, go on and share," Hades says. 

Lesches' eye sparkle with mischief that Homer recognizes. 

"Oh no-" he mutters under his breath.

"Oh, I know that look. I'm out, nuh uh. Not again," Hermes says before bolting off. 

Hades ignores the God of Swiftness as he stares at Lesches expectantly. Homer hides his face in his hands in preparation, scared for what his cousin is about to pull. 

"I've told this to Hermes, but I believe you'll benefit from it too. You have been trapped in a mortal body because someone, whoever it is, willed it to be. Once in this mortal body, mortal rules apply. Sure, you have some of your powers, but you're now a mortal like the rest of us. This means you can die like a mortal. No one cares about your life, Hades. We all go to the same place afterwards, so what's the point? What's the purpose? What's the use in anything when nothing we do matters in the end? You live like a mortal; you die like a mortal. You'll be forgotten like a mortal. You'll fade away, powerless and ignored, never to be praised or worshipped again. Remember Helios? No, no one knows him. He used to control the Sun, and now that's Apollo's job. Who will rule over the Underworld when you've faded away? My bet is on Persephone. She's kinder, more organized, better than you by a landslide. I wonder what us mortals will think then? Oh, great Persephone, great Goddess of the Underworld. Hades, who's that? Who's he? Sounds weird, sounds lost and forgotten. Let's focus back to everyone else, the real Gods of Olympus. How would you cope, knowing you were nothing but a lost ideal?" 

Hades, in every right, stands there frozen. He blinks and blinks, and blinks, unable to respond to that. How does one respond to that, anyway? When someone force-feeds you the harsh truth of your mortal reality? When reality comes slamming down upon you like a sledgehammer? What do you do then? What can you do? You just stand there, processing something indecipherably cruel to your mind, breaking in half again and again. There's nothing you can do, not really. Nothing, nothing at all. 

Homer exhales sharply from his seat on the couch, watching free-from-hands as everything goes down. One hand is over his mouth as he glances between the broken-down look on Hades and Lesches. He slowly stands up and walks over to the two of them, rubbing his face as he steps by Hades and next to his cousin. He leans by their ear, taking in his roommate's state. 

"I think you broke him," he whispers. 

"Maybe just a little," Lesches whispers back.

"What do we do?"

"Just leave him, I guess. That's what I did to Hermes."

"You gotta stop traumatizing Greek Gods."

"Ha, no."

"Les, he's frozen."

"'Mer, he's fine."

"Les."

"He'll be fine later. Just walk around him until he moves, or something."

"Okay," Homer says as he sighs.

Lesches puts a calm hand on their cousin's shoulder, giving a warm smile. 

"I'll see you later, 'Mer. Good luck with your Greek-Wannabe, yeah?"

"Yeah, you too. Coffee shop this weekend?"

"Sounds like a plan. Bye, cousin."

"Bye, Lessie."

The cousins give one last hug before Lesches leaves. Homer steps around Hades as he heads back to their shared room, wanting to go back to class preparation.

As Lesches walks back to their own dorm, they pass by Hermes trying to flirt with an unsuspecting student. They roll their eyes as they grab him by the shirt, dragging him away as he says some sort of goodbye to his latest target.

"Ya done traumatizing one of the Big Three?" Hermes makes small talk as Lesches lets go of his shirt.

They walk side by side.

"For now. Poor sap froze mid-lecture."

"Worse than me?"

"No."

"It's Hades, he's worse than everyone."

"Worse than Zeus, Lord of Dicking?"

"...no, but why do you have to call him that?"

"It's funny."

"Well, if you like funny, then why don't we-"

"I will cut your baby dick off with a pair of rusty, dulled scissors."

"Okay, then."

Hermes stays silent after that as they walk back to their dorm. 

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

The day ends with Hades having an existential crisis, Homer preparing for his classes, and with Hermes and Lesches walking in peace back to their dorm. Plenty of things go unanswered, however. Who sent that letter with the butterfly weed? Why is it addressed to Hades, and only for his eyes? What spell does Hecate need a mortal's help for? Why won't Persephone talk to Hades? What's with the Greek Gods being everywhere?

And most importantly: how the fuck is Homer going to win the wager with his reckless cousin running about at Matthessy?

[quirkywaffelfries]

So I got the Mario RPG remake and I've been playing it recently

The entire week before it's release was probably the week I was most excited

The ONLY way you would be able to top that is if Nintendoland got a remake as well.

But yeah, I got the game and I've been playing it since it was released. So here's my story so far...

CAUTION!: Beyond here be MAAAAJOR spoilers for the Mario RPG remake! If you want to play the game yourself, now would be a great stopping point! Oh yeah, this is also a veeery long post. I'm not joking. This may be one of the longest fucking posts I have made, tops. You have been warned.

In the beginging...

I start up the game. I get the opening sequence with Peach chilling in the tulip field with butterflies. Sky goes dark, Bowser shows up, aaand I'm sure you already know where this is going. Mario shows up, and the game starts out as any Mario game would- defeat Bowser and save the princess. So, off we go to the castle.

Bowser's Castle

Bowser's castle is what you'd imagine Bowser's castle would look like- eerie and creepy, with stone statues lining the halls. After fighting some guards and crossing the lava drawbridge, we get to the throne room, and Peach is tied up on the ceiling. Mario jumps on the chandelier, and Bowser's on the other one in front of him. Bowser does his usual shpeel, and the fight begins.

Now, even though I haven't played the original, I watched someone play the original on Youtube, so I knew not to attack Bowser, but the chain chomp holding the chandelier. A few jumps later, the chomp isn't able to hold the chandelier anymore, and drops it, along with Bowser.

Just when you think it's over, Bowser throws a hammer at the chain chomp holding the chandelier Mario is on. Except it doesn't fall, so he does it again. After the second hammer hits the chain chomp, it finally releases the chandelier, dropping Mario. The rest of the cutscene plays out with Mario jumping on Bowser to reach Peach, when suddenly, the castle shakes. The screen shifts from the inside of the castle to outside the castle. A large rainbow star gets pierced by a comically large sword with eyes, which falls directly into Bowser's castle.

After the Sword Fell

Cut to Mario flying through the air, conveniently falling into the chimney of his house (which is a wrap pipe, for reasons I do not understand) and even more conveniently falling onto his bed. We get out of the house, and there's a toad waiting outside. Giving the toad a quick recap of the last two paragraphs, we head to the Mushroom Kingdom. We get some money, some health, some FP, and a mushroom from the silly little secret in the fireplace in Peach's bedroom.

We're about to leave, when suddenly, someone cries out. A cutscene starts playing, with Croco running away from our little marshmallow boy, Mallow! Croco's stolen the frog coin that Mallow got from his grandpa for an errand, so now we're chasing him to get the coin back. After a quick chase, we finally catch the filthy thief and start fighting. Since Croco is weak to fire, I had Mario just use fireball over and over until the bastard went down. We get the coin back (along with someone's wallet), and return to the Mushroom Kingdom...

For it to be overrun by Shy Guys on pogo sticks. Getting to the castle's throne room, Claymorton and his bodyguards pick on Mario a bit for not being able to jump (which is obviously a lie), and then start fighting him. After giving Claymorton a quick mind-read, I learn that he's weak to lightning. So I have Mario use regular attacks, and Mallow use thunder spell. A good few turns later, Claymorton finally reaches 0 hp. The Kingdom returns to normal, and we get our first star in our journey, which was just chilling behind the throne.

When everything returned to normal, I wanted to do a few more things before we left. First, I returned the wallet and got a mushroom for it. Second, we went to the item shop and got the cricket pie that Mallow was sent out for. With that out of the way, we left for the sewers.

Into the Haunted Sewers!

So we head on our way to meet Mallow's grandpa. The pathway? A sewer. So I think, "okay, this won't be so bad. It's just a half-land half-water level, won't be a problem."

Boy, was I WRONG.

There's a Kikuohana song called It's Another Maze There, and that sums up what this felt like for me. I'd go through one pipe just to end up in an area I've already been in, and I just kept going through one pipe after another. A lot of the time, I just ended up back at the beginning again. Oh, did I forget to mention that I wasn't alone? Yeah! There were rats, ghosts, shadow, and freaking hobgoblins in there!

When I finally made it out after a good 20-25 minutes of hell, I finally made it to the goddamned bastard that is Belome. At this point I just wanted to get out of there. After defeating Belome, it turns out that he was the thing keeping the flood gate behind him from opening. So after a failed attempt to close the floodgates, the Midas River minigame began.

So I'm fine with the first part, heck, I'm decent at it. It's the barrel event that I'm so bad at. I always hit at least one or two fish. The thing I'm so embarrassed about is that even with the 20 coin discount, I couldn't afford one frog coin. Worst part? I was one coin off. Humiliating.

Out of the Sewers, and Into the Pond

We finally make it out of the Haunted Sewer Meikyuu™ and into Mallow's home. We hop across the tadpole bridge, and the classic cutscene in which we discover that Mallow is adopted and is most definitely NOT a frog. I'm sorry, but I simply couldn't take the music seriously at first. Ah well. Before I left though, we gave Frogfucius his cricket pie, and he gives Mallow a froggie stick. Yay! A weapon for Mallow!

And now, for my favorite part yet...

Meeting 🌟🌟 The Boy! 🌟🌟

So I get to Rose Town, and the first thing I notice is that there are arrows falling down everywhere. I check out the inn, and there's Gaz playing with his toys while his mother watches over him. Eventually, Gaz notices Mario, and asks him to play with him. Mario accepts, and plays the Bowser doll while Gaz plays the Geno doll. Gaz launches Geno's bullet launcher (I forgot the name), which misses the Bowser doll and hits Mario instead. Apparently, that's enough to knock out Mario. ...Huh.

Well- now for the part that I was most excited about. In the middle of the night, while everyone is sleeping, something descends from the sky in the form of a yellow, glowing ball of light. observing the dolls, it hovers over each of them, one by one. First over Geno, then Mario, then Bowser, then Peach. It hovers around a bit before floating to the Geno doll, and possessing it. Then the doll begins to glow brightly, which makes the whole screen turn white. Once the bright white blast fades away, we see the Geno doll once again, but he's grown to the size of Mario. Out of nowhere, he begins to move, twitching his hand, then looking up. He then looks down at his hands, clutching and releasing them. After doing this twice, he tries to get up, but awkwardly stumbles and hits the ground. He tries again, and succeeds, and takes a step, only to lose his balance again and hit the table, falling to the ground again. Unfazed, he shakes it off, gets back up, and walks out of the inn.

Morning comes, and Gaz is trying to tell his mother about how he saw Geno walking around, but she doesn't believe him. Gaz apologizes to Mario for what he did the previous morning, then we leave for the forest.

Getting to the cross-section of the forest maze, we noticed Geno walking around, and tail him because it didn't look like there was anywhere else to go. Eventually we get to a point where we manage to exit the cross-section, and come to a straight path. Ahead of us is Bowyer, who's shooting arrows. Mario tries the classic maneuver of going in fists flying, only to be stopped by Mallow, who's playing it far more cautious. Hearing someone approaching them, Mallow tells Mario to hide, so they duck down in some nearby bushes. One of Bowyer's arrows shows up, dragging a star piece with him. Bowyer brushes it off, saying that he doesn't want to be disturbed since he's practicing. Suddenly, Geno appears from the sky, demanding that Bowyer cease his shenanigans and return the star, to which Bowyer has the AUDACITY to call Geno strange-looking, and starts a battle.

Bowyer asks who Geno even is, to which he responds that he serves a 'higher authority' and that the star piece belongs to everyone and the Bowyer isn't allowed to keep it. This angers Bowyer, so he begins to shoot arrows. This causes Geno to slightly panic and tell Bowyer to 'chill out.' Cut to Mario and Mallow, who are talking about helping Geno fight Bowyer. Mallow agrees with Mario that they should help, and swears to do everything he can... from a distance. Suddenly, an arrow falls nearby, hitting the ground. Seeing this, they start running, dodging the arrows. During this, Mallow trips and hits the ground, flat on his fluffy face. Mario doesn't notice this, and accidentally leaves him behind. Transition back to Geno, who has had enough of Bowyer and uppercuts him. Angry at being hit, he fires an arrow directly at Geno, which is intercepted and blocked by Mario's very convenient timing. Geno thanks him for the help, and asks who he is.

Almost as soon as he asks this, Mallow catches up and yells at Mario for ditching him. He then remarks at how Geno looks awfully familiar. Geno, recognizing Mario's name, says that 'we' know a lot about him. Before anything else can be said, Bowyer interrupts the conversation, remarking that he is insulted for being ignored for so long. So after that long intermission, the actual boss begins.

Bowyer... actually wasn't much of a problem. even with his button-lock mechanic, he was easy to beat. Eh, whatever. Once he's down, Mario grabs the star to Geno's request, making that the 2nd out of 7.

AAAAAAAH OMG THIS POST IS SO LONGGGG I'M NOT EVEN DONE YETTTT

Ugh, guess I'm gonna have to make a part two because I'm eepy and no longer have motivation to write

Anyways g'night folks

see y'all in the morning