#no she does not have to accept every aspect of being famous

[boardboxes]

why are boundaries so hard for people to understand and grasp. chappell roan does not OWE anyone a picture because we made her famous. if she asks yall to please leave her alone in public because it makes her uncomfortable, im not sure why this is up for debate. shes stated multiple times why she doesn’t want to take photos on the streets and still people slam her because “its part of the job” “we are owed it” “she only wants the good parts of being famous”. chappell wants to perform and create music and share that with people, she doesn’t want people coming up to her in public or stalking her family. it isnt rocket science, leave her alone

[aahanna]

The world of Premchand's female characters..

This is the strong aspect of Premchand literature.

To understand Premchand's creative vision, it is necessary to look deeply at his philosophy of women. Of his approximately 300 stories, a hundred are on women's life, while not more than 50 are on the rural environment. The role of female characters in his novels is also not less. There are strong female characters in every novel. Among his female characters, Suman, Sukhda, Nirmala, Jalpa, Dhaniya, Malti etc. cannot be forgotten.

Premchand's women society is Shatarupa. It contains heart-touching stories of human relationships. In his profuse female characters, glimpses of relationships like girl, young woman, girlfriend, wife, mother, sister, friend, daughter-in-law, widow, sister-in-law, prostitute etc. will be found, in which their independent personality has been lost and women have become the embodiment of exploitation, slavery and submission. Yes, but this is one aspect of his women's philosophy. Nirmala in his literature

('Nirmala' novel)

Live and die the most painful life, but all the female characters are not destitute and slaves of men, rather these women challenge male authority, refuse to accept their husband as God and are active participants in procreation and Swaraj movement. Women will be found.

Premchand depicts the traditional form of woman in his literature. It reveals the poignant nature of her being a woman and her compulsion to live with the problems and tortures of family life and creates a modern sense of self-consciousness in her. It is written about Malti of 'Godaan' that she was a butterfly from outside and a bee from inside. There is a collection of modern woman's values in her butterfly and traditional feminine values in her bee.

To understand their women's issues, it is important to know and understand Dhaniya and Malti.

Is. This modernity in Premchand's women's thinking is not from the Western women's movement, but is the contribution of Arya Samaj. He was a member of Arya Samaj and was associated with its reform movement. Along with this, they consider protection of sexual purity and chastity of women as paramount. Premchand creates high level human ideals (sexual purity and chastity along with service-sacrifice, motherly love, sacrifice, motherhood, creation of family, active for national goals) and consciousness of self-realization in the female characters. These women have the ability to take a man to divinity ('mystery' story). In 'Godaan', Mehta says, 'Woman is as superior to man as light is to darkness. Forgiveness, sacrifice and non-violence are the highest ideals of life for humans. Woman has achieved this ideal.

Premchand does not want to break the family. Although his story 'Bade Ghar Ki Beti' is famous, he also gives it a modern form. They talk about the use of artificial methods for family planning and limiting the family to two children and its rights, monogamy, man's right over property, divorce and woman's right to half the property.

In his writings, Premchand brings the Indian woman equal to the man and writes that the man should give up the madness of ruling over the woman, otherwise they will remain in their own rights. They should have equal rights and the decision should be left to them only.

In this way Premchand establishes the condition and direction of Indian women and becomes the father of women's discussion. Her women's thinking becomes the foundation of independent India and women get many rights.

Source - kkgoyanka

[bellestarot]

Yunjin's Reading

December 30, 2024

Right Now

She is either traveling or about to travel soon with the group. Most of her focus right now is on her work. It seems like she feels she has to prove something to an older woman regarding her performance in the group.

She has been earning a lot from her work, so she is financially stable. She plans to use this money wisely.

However, there seems to be something negative in the industry or her personal life affecting her mental health. This also stems from conflicts she’s involved in.

Love Life

Apparently, she is not single. Is she with someone? If it’s not a relationship yet, is it heading that way?

She feels that with this person, she had to break a bit of her ego to show interest and genuinely get to know them. For her, this was serious because she’s the type of person who doesn’t usually pursue someone she’s interested in—she expects the opposite.

But with this person, she felt different. She thought that if she didn’t make the effort, she would lose a great opportunity.

There’s a chance this person had already shown interest, but she initially didn’t accept it and later changed her mind.

She feels they think very alike and have a strong connection. This person might be from another country, or they met while traveling. Interestingly, this person is very romantic, affectionate, sensitive, and artistic.

However, there seems to be a "Pride and Prejudice" situation because this person is either not as famous or doesn’t have as much money as she does.

She acknowledges that she has a materialistic side and values money, which might make this person feel insecure. She’s been working on changing her mindset and behavior, realizing that money isn’t the definition of their connection. Instead, it’s about the time they spend together.

Career

She's working on something. She’s been using her creativity, as she is a very artistic person. She is passionate about what she does and shows it to those around her. She’s been trying to stay emotionally balanced, especially regarding her work, as she’s had to make a bold and significant agreement with someone.

The agreement worked out, and she’s been working with younger people in her field, as well as interacting with someone in a higher position, mostly a boss.

She also feels betrayed by an older man in a professional context. Something happened that made her feel unprotected—whether it was something said about her online, in person, or physically. She feels like this specific person doesn’t care about her well-being.

Family

She feels very disconnected from her family. At this moment, she feels lonely and remembers a time in the past when she had strong family support and shared many loving moments. Something terrible seems to have happened that caused a separation.

Even though she still cares about her family, there is a relative with their own business or company who appears to be involved in something recent.

Overall, though, she feels anxious and afraid, like she’s fighting battles alone without family support.

Friendships

Publicly, she appears very social, but in reality, she’s choosing to spend a lot of time alone—though not voluntarily. It seems to be a very sad loneliness.

She has an older male friend, a younger female friend, and most of her current friends come from her work in the entertainment industry.

She also has an older female friend she deeply respects but feels like she’s walking on eggshells around.

Future

She will eventually come out of this introspective period and start reconnecting with friends and meeting new people. Her social life will improve significantly.

She will need to let go of some of her ego to find happiness within herself. This process will involve acknowledging and improving some of her flaws and behaviors, making her healthier in every aspect.

Unfortunately, she will feel hurt by a woman—perhaps a friend—due to some action that causes their friendship to end.

This will lead to severe anxiety as she faces difficult decisions, possibly related to a solo career or something similar. This situation will cause her a lot of stress.

Advice

"The most beautiful state of life is free and voluntary dependence—and how could it be possible without love?"

— Johann Goethe

[knickynoo]

do you have any random alex keaton headcanons? i think you’ve done a couple already but i’m not to sure.

love your blog btw <3

Thank you!

I think I've done a couple of headcanon posts focusing on Alex and Ellen as a couple, but idk that I've done one exclusively for Alex. Hmm.

• In "A, My Name is Alex," we learn that Alex was frequently under extreme pressure from his teachers to always have the right answer at the ready, be an example of a perfect student, accept the social isolation as the price to pay for being "special" and so on. We'll, I headcanon that at some point in his childhood, Alex attempted to go on strike. He had a pep talk with himself before school, telling himself he would refuse to answer any questions no matter how many times the teacher called on him.

He didn't even make it to lunchtime. The teacher's perplexed and disappointed expression, combined with his own fear that others would think he didn't know the answer was enough to break him.

• Alex played soccer as a kid (canon) but he wasn't particularly good at it (headcanon). He joined at the urging of Steven and Elyse, who had hoped it would help him make friends, but just ended up being that kid who thought he knew more than the coach and who tripped over his own feet several times a game. The times he managed to score goals were mostly accidental. Steven and Elyse made every effort to show up to each game and cheer him on.

• Even though Alex makes fun of his father's job a lot, he does watch every documentary Steven has a part in making and then sits with him after to discuss his favorite aspects of it.

• The orange juice obsession started as a young child and only strengthened as Alex got older. He'll drink other juice if that's the only option, but he never chooses it over oj. He can also do a blind taste test and tell (with near perfect accuracy) what the brand is. He prefers homemade, though, which Steven occasionally makes in large batches. Steven and Elyse often have to remind Alex to drink water.

• Alex is an amazing cook, and he's not shy about taking charge in the kitchen and whipping up a meal every so often. (this is actually kind of canon, as there's an episode where he makes his famous "Pasta Alex" for his family) He mostly sticks to picking recipes from cookbooks, but he's also got a natural talent for knowing what flavors will work well together and can pull together a good meal without any specific instructions.

• When Alex hasn't made a trip to his local bank in a while, the manager and tellers call the Keatons to make sure he's okay.

• As Mallory ventures into and becomes successful in the fashion world, Alex is one of her biggest cheerleaders. She has a line of sweater vests, and he's thrilled whenever a new one is released. He agrees to be her model in some of the advertisements for them.

• Shortly after Andy is born, Alex starts a college fund for him. He doesn't tell him parents and secretly squirrels away money over the years. Between this and the fund his parents start, Andy can pretty much go to any school he wants by the time he's old enough to start thinking of colleges.

• Despite his attitude about success and his desire for immense wealth, Alex ends up being very generous with his money as he makes his way up the ladder in the business world. He tried very hard to hide his big heart, but he can't deny that he likes helping others in need. He makes frequent, anonymous donations to many charities and also does volunteer work with Ellen.

• Oh yeah, I have to include the mention of my headcanon that Alex and Ellen end up finding each other again and getting married. Duh.

• Alex is autistic, and it's something he eventually comes to realize a little later on in life, once the condition starts to become more widely understood and recognized (especially in adults.) It's actually Ellen who connects the dots, and it's that moment of realization where a lot of things fall into place. It explains his difficulty with emotions and relationships, his need for sameness and why things fall apart for him when things change, the black and white thinking, and the way he struggles to see things from other people's perspectives, his strong obsessions, and his very obviously savant-like talents. (His ability to do extremely complex math as a toddler, identifying coins by their sounds, easily memorizing entire passages from books and board game rule books, etc)

Alex thinks it's an absurd suggestion at first, and she drops the topic for fear of upsetting him, but it stays lodged in the back of his mind. He becomes so completely absorbed in proving that he does not fit the criteria or the little list on the paper Ellen had shown him that he can't focus on anything else. Which, you know, only goes to prove her point even more. Eventually, he relents and admits she's probably right. Getting to that point of acceptance (and maybe even seeking professional resources) is one of the best things that happens to Alex.

(And as a little bonus headcanon, I think a similar chain of events unfold when Alex goes to talk to Elyse about the whole situation. She listens, and though she's a little overwhelmed, she agrees it does fit. Later on, she goes to Steven with a printout or a book about autism and is like, "He got it from somewhere," to which Steven goes, "???? Elyse, what are you talking about?? Please let me get back to making my elaborate chart detailing the electricity usage of every person in this house. Also, I hope you didn't buy a different brand of napkins again or I'll have a nervous breakdown." And Elyse is like 🤦🏼‍♀️)

Thanks for the ask! This was a lot of fun.

[foxydivaxx]

More Gossip Girl AU Headcanons: The Roronoas

-Everyone calls Zoro Prince-sama because he acts like one

-Zoro resembles Arashi a lot which many suspect to be a reason why Terra treats Zoro like trash

-Idol by Yoasobi in this universe is sang by Miku and that song is actually referring to not only herself and all idols in general but that song is her way of telling people about Zoro's situation. The fact that it was released around the time of the #FreeZoro movement makes it more awesome and heartwarming. Zoro cried when he heard the song and thanked Miku for it

-The #FreeZoro movement was secretly started by Kuina, Perona and Zoro's backup dancers

-Miku and Zoro got their talents from their dad which is why their mum behaves the way she does. She envies her kids and her husband

-Arashi watched his kids on TV whilst in asylum. What Terra did not know is that Mihawk found out about Arashi and figured out a way to free him and whisk him off to Japan to be free. When the #FreeZoro movement begins, Arashi returns to America to reunite with his son. He also gains the strength to confront his wife and proceeds to finalise the divorce proceedings that she tried to delay years ago

-The Roronoa/Dracule clan are all great dancers

-The family now host movie nights every weekend to watch old Roronoa and Dracule classics

-Arashi and Mihawk have been best friends for years since they were kids. Terra drove a wedge between them

-Both Arashi and Mihawk go out together a lot these days and many suspect that there could be more to their relationship especially since Mihawk helped them a lot.

-Mihawk paid back the debt he owes to the Roronoas who saved him during his own struggles.

-Enma, Kitetsu and Wado are Zoro's cousins in this verse and they are all famous actors

-Grandma Roronoa is a top actress and Grandpa Roronoa is a singer and actor.

-Grandpa Roronoa passed away a year before Zoro's birth

-Grandma Roronoa always makes rice balls for the kids, especially Zoro and even taught Sanji how to make them

-The reason Zoro did not become like his mum or worse is thanks to Mihawk and Boa Hancock who serves as his lawyer and is now his new manager

-Some aspects of Zoro's life mirrors Arashi's in a lot of ways and also Mihawk's too as both father figures had turbulent relationships with one abusive parent.Arashi had a toxic relationship with his dad and Mihawk had to separate himself from his mother

-The Roronoa/Dracule family all live under the same roof. Zoro started living on his own once he turned 18.

- Sora and their kids plus Zoro’s other friends and their families are considered part of their family

- When Zoro started adapting a sexier image (similar to Koda Kumi), it rose a lot of eyebrows at first as people were so used to him being cute, baby Zoro. Eventually, the general public accepted it as they realized that he suits the sexy image better

- Sometimes whenever the family is having a dance party, Zoro’s inner sexy tiger comes out and next thing everyone knows, those sexy dance moves he exhibits onstage begin to manifest. The thing about Zoro is once the music comes on, he changes completely. Sanji too is like that

- Speaking of Sanji, people have been calling him Sanji Roronoa way before he and Zoro finally married

- Arashi has tried to get Zoro to tone down the sexiness albeit in a joking manner similar to Whitebeard and Sanji

- Zoro got his love of fashion and bling from his two dads who are pretty snazzy dressers. (Picture Zoro wearing bling similar to Sasha Banks)

- Once the cameras stop rolling and once Zoro is offstage, he becomes a cute little kitten. Onstage, he is a sexy tiger, similar to his dad. Sanji is similar in that regard except that one is a sexy fox xD

- Zoro’s natural singing voice is a lot deeper and sensual. He knows how to manipulate his voice to get the desired results out of a song, something that shocks Japanese netizens a lot

- Yosaku and Johnny are the pranksters of the family

- Perona and Kuina always go shopping together and help Zoro get clothes

- Miku’s normal speaking voice is a lot more matured compared to her idol voice

- Zoro and Miku write a lot of their songs especially now that they are older and wish to express certain things themselves

- Miku does her hair herself

- Miku is always portrayed as a bunny and Zoro is a mighty green tiger and often times is portrayed as an adorable black kitty with green stripes in fanart

[theholidayslingerlikebadperfume]

anyways reading that long ass post i forgot to talk about the joe aspect of it all but honestly i was thinking about how everytime something happens in the taylor dating universe, there are like the same 4 types of posts I see being made about taylor swift and honestly its like okay

i feel this getting rambly so like okay the reason people care about taylor's dating life is because taylor uses her dating life to her advantage. Even that famous quote of hers about the different language prescribed to different genders betrays a truth about her business practices that is obvious to anyone who paid attention during 2023 to her dating life and the truth of the matter is, taylor swift has and always will use her dating life to her advantage.

since folklore, starting with seven, taylor has voiced a story arc of her learning to accept her desire for attention. famous people want to be famous for a reason and that reason at its base level is attention or money, usually both. taylor's music pre-pandemic is very good girl era of her and post-pandemic, she has been slowly making music that is more and more disagreeable with the general public. she is more and more willing to portray herself as the villain because after 9 or 10 failed relationships, you have to start doing serious introspection.

it's extremely unlikely that anyone would be the perfect victim whose only problem was that "they loved too earnestly" in every single relationship they've ever been in. and ttpd exposes a lot of what most of the fandom knows to be true but doesn't want to accept for some reason and that is that taylor swift DOES use her dating life to her advantage. i personally dont see anything wrong with that because like duh, so does literally every other famous person out there? so many musicians sing solely about their dating lives and its only a problem when women accept that this is how they stay relevant in the media.

and like a consequence of taylor using her dating life to her advantage is that those people become public discourse. I think there is a reason why she doesnt say much of anything about her relationship with joe on any of these albums but especially ttpd because i do think that although taylor uses her love life to her advantage, she doesnt do so maliciously and has serious conversations with people about how much they care about being private with their love life.

the way she treats the joe relationship has stayed pretty consistent and she has only ever touched upon what in that relationship made her emotionally cheat and then date ratty in ttpd and thats probably all she will ever be comfortable doing because she knows she doesnt have joe's consent for their relationship to be used for her business purposes. i can see part of the reason why we only really get songs about them falling in love on every album is because that's a generic enough type of song that it doesnt say much beyond basic details of how they met and how he made her feel supported.

and so much of this album is taylor trying to come to terms with the fact that SHE chose her life with joe just as much as he did with her, which is why she ends up at "we both did nothing wrong" and "we just didnt know how to love each other correctly" several times on the record because SHE is just as much to blame for choosing to change herself for love. SHE made the decision to change her strategy when it comes to romance to hold onto the idea of what she thought it'd be like to be with joe.

and it's just wild to me to expect the fandom to not have opinions on quotes given to the public from the figures themselves about their feelings on the matter. like, i cannot make it any clearer that if a celebrity doesnt want you to know something, you wouldn't.

[mewtagen-mau]

Entry 6

It was not a restful night after we got Ameiko home safe. She needed some time, quite understandably. The rest of us separated for the evening. I worked on a potion to replenish our diminished stock, to keep my mind occupied and not fretting over the fact I came within a breath of death.

Before we’d separated, our strange little group did have a talk amongst ourselves. Nanel apologized for nearly getting me killed. He said he was new to working with others, and he would try to be more careful in the future. I told him, in no uncertain terms, that he needed to keep whatever that other form of his was under control if we were going to continue working together. I didn’t want anymore close calls exasperated by my own allies.

On the other side of the coin, however, I also spoke to Tabot after Nanel had retired for the night. I asked him to tell me a little about his god. I know what anyone else who’s a little learned does—that Aroden wasthe first of the Ascended gods, and Iomedae’s predecessor who died roughly a century ago. And yet, as I said to Tabot, a dead god cannot grant his follower the power to save a man from the brink of death—bringing him virtually to full health from death’s doorstep. So I wanted to know Tabot’s point of view.

Tabot didn’t seem to know anything more concrete than myself. He’d found a holy book of Aroden what he was younger, and something just felt right to him. Faith. That’s hard for a feline of science like myself to wrap my head around. Even my belief in Shelyn is grounded in what I can see. I can see the beauty in the world, and the beauty in other people, and how the power of a person’s creativity can sway minds or change history. I don’t have to blindly follow to understand and respect Shelyn’s teachings.

This…this is much harder for me to accept. On the one hand, it is undeniable that Tabot is being granted the power of a paladin. So clearly his belief grants him strength.  But Aroden is dead. A century ago every other follower of the god of humanity lost their power. Iomedae took his place in the pantheon. That is all fact, recorded history, there are people still alive who remember it. Iomedae being a god and not merely his herald is evidence of it. But then where is Tabot’s power stemming from?

Tabot doesn’t know the answer. He doesn’t know what might revive a god, or if an aspect of Aroden survived, or if Aroden never died at all and was merely somewhere else—whatever that might entail. But he has faith in Aroden. And I suppose for that time being I simply have to accept that as the answer. I thanked him for healing me—he told me I should thank Aroden, so for Tabot’s sake I did. Either I’m thanking the being who granted Tabot the power to heal me, or I’m giving thanks into the void. No harm done either way, I suppose.

I eventually found my way to sleep, and the dawn of a new day.

In the morning we discussed what I suspected about Nualia, and were told a story of some local murders that happened not long before I came to town, by a man who came to be known as Chopper.

He was an artist, who carved birds into many of the buildings and other pieces of wood in town. His skill was famous, and anyone whose place was chosen to have a bird was honored. Then he went to live in seclusion, and not long after people started being murdered. Basically daily. Gruesomely, too. Their eyes and tongues were cut out.

The previous sheriff cornered the murderer and injured him at the site of his final victim’s murder, but was killed himself in the struggle. However the blood trail from his injuries led a certain other guard by the name of Balor Hemlock straight to the secluded island just off the coast where their famed reclusive artist lived. At first they all wanted to believe he was to be the next victim—but when they arrived to his home they found the gruesome trophies he’d taken from his victims, and they had to accept the truth. The man killed himself as a final offering at the foot of a shrine to a demon lord none dare to speak aloud. Given what we’ve found today I would be willing to place a bet on it being a shrine to Lamashtu as well.

I think I will be a bit more discerning with drawing Shelyn’s symbol on my sketches in the future, at least while we are in town. I do not want to dredge up bad memories, even accidentally.

We also talked about Nualia. I told the others what I knew—of her, the tragedy of her life in Sandpoint, and the eventual fire that supposedly took her life—and Nanel helped fill in some gaps in my knowledge, having lived in town longer.

With what we know now, it seems certain that Nualia is taking revenge on the town for her mistreatment when she was younger.

It’s such a tragedy. This didn’t have to happen. If someone had just treated Nualia like a person instead of like some holy prop with no feelings of her own, this could have all been avoided. She was just a child! It’s no wonder she’s lashing out now, after what was done to her. If you treat a person like a thing their entire life, you can’t suddenly put the burden of personhood on them the moment they do something wrong, and then expect sympathy from them the moment they hurt you in return.

…

I am going to give Mori the biggest hug next time I see her.

Anyways…I’m not saying what Nualia did was justified…necessarily. If the goblins had their way, they’d kill everyone. Even people who had nothing to do with what happened to her. Children, for starters. Like the child who was nearly killed by the goblin hiding in his closet. That’s not a theoretical, we saw the end result of what happened to the boy’s father. Oh yes, I’m sure Nualia could make an argument about how children were cruel to her too, but those are children. They don’t know any better. You can teach a child to do better, you don’t have to kill them over it. Any revenge that is going to involve child murder is, at best, misguided. At worst, completely warped and irredeemable.

I hope it is not the later. I really do. That poor woman suffered so much. She needs someone who can give her a new start.

But if she is too far gone…her life is not worth the life of an entire town. I’m sorry.

We knew what we had to do—Tsuto had tried to flee into a locked door in the basement of the glassworks. We still didn’t know how he’d snuck so many goblins in. The answer was likely beyond that door.

So, with Ameiko’s blessing, we returned to the glassworks’ basement. Tabot broke down the door—as Krysa felt their new lockpicking set was too new and shiny to muss up with this lock. Then he made a trek down a tunnel, which slowly grew darker as we clearly travelled somewhere beneath Sandpoint.

Nanel cast a spell on his fancy little flower, and it lit up the tunnel we found ourselves in. As we walked, we saw a tunnel off to our right. Nanel’s light didn’t fully illuminate the side passage, so Tabot lit a torch and tossed it inside.

As the light illuminated the rest of the dead-end passage, a nightmare creature leapt from the shadows of the tunnel and tried to clamp its jaws onto Nanel. Fortunately Nanel pulled away.

Krysa identified the horror—a Sinspawn. Something created with old magic. Ancient magic. Sin magic from the age of Thassilon ancient. The how or why of what a Sinspawn was doing in a tunnel under Sandpoint would have to wait, however, as it was not giving us a moment to contemplate.

The creature lunged at Nanel again—this time its teeth met flesh. Tabot stepped forward and struck the living nightmare of oozing flesh and gnashing teeth. I darted around and finished it off with a quick stab through where I figured its heart ought to be. The creature dissolved into a fetid pile of liquified flesh, only leaving behind the ranseur it had carried in its claws.

There was nothing else down the side passage, and as Nanel’s wound was fairly minor, we pressed on.

It didn’t take long for us to come upon a second side passage on the same side. Krysa—with their stronger night vision—told us they also saw another side passage further ahead, a little beyond where our light reached. We decided to explore the nearer of the two passages first. We had promised Ameiko that we would clear out the entire area, so it was best that we didn’t skip anything. We used a stick of chalk Krysa had handy to mark where we’d already been, to avoid getting lost.

This next passage was uncomfortably narrow, forcing us to walk single file. Nanel took the lead, and was the first into the next room—which was made of worked stone as opposed to being a natural cave like the tunnel we’d been in. He called back a moment later with some concern in his voice asking if any of us spoke ‘the demon language’. I don’t speak Abyssal, and I didn’t prepare a Comprehend Languages formulae today, believing that I’d likely need all of my formulae prepared to be combat oriented.

Krysa said they speak the language of demons, however. Clever little rat. Unfortunately, by the time they scurried to the front of the tunnel, the words Nanel had seen seemed to have vanished entirely. Nanel swore he’d seen writing on the wall, however, and we did not disbelieve him.

Something weird was going on, especially if there was writing from The Abyss on the walls.

We continued forward through more narrow passageways, until we found ourselves in a room with a grand looking statue of an enraged woman. It looked historical—possibly even Thassilonian if the trend were to continue—but she was not someone I recognized from any of my studied. Nor was the rune within her book, although it seemed to be a recurring motif within this place, as we saw it in a few other locations. So, it must have been important to the people who built this place originally. It was some sort of seven-pointed star. I know it isn’t part of the Thassilonian alphabet, but beyond that I don’t know what the rune actually is or means. Perhaps it is an ancient holy (or unholy) symbol, or part or some long lost magic? It could simply be a symbol that meant something to some small sect of people who lived in this part of Varisia, which only carried meaning for them. It’s hard to say when it comes to Thassilon. If it isn’t recorded, it is likely lost to time forever.

To our luck, the beautifully crafted ranseur the statue was holding was a real usable weapon, and hadn’t been looted in the centuries this statue had stood abandoned. Nanel took it, and has made impressive use of it.

Less fortunately for us, more writing appeared on the wall. This time I spotted it—and it was written in Thassalonian. It said “angry screams are still screams”.

Foreboding, to say the least.

The moment I looked away, the words vanished, just as the ones Nanel had seen did.

Not much further ahead, Krysa warned that they heard the sounds of more Sinspawn through the door. Our group is not exactly stealthy—Tabot’s armor is loud, and it is difficult for me to quiet my own movement given my cane. So we decided to try to rush them instead.

Except when we burst in, we couldn’t see any signs of the Sinspawn Krysa had heard. They were certain of what they had heard.

Nanel inched forward, to look down below a catwalk. And that’s when they struck. Both monstrosities had been hanging just below the catwalk, and they swung up and lunged at Nanel. Once again fangs met flesh. But Nanel gave back as much as he took, biting the one that got him and then slipping away as he also jabbed with his new ranseur.

Krysa put some bolts into one of the creatures, and I threw a bomb at it. Tabot slayed one with his blade after Nanel got another stab at it, and I slew the other with my own.

There was little else of interest in this room—it was one a jail, long ago, but now there was nothing but dust and bad memories lingering here. We did find that the back of one of the cells had crumbled and that a judicious use of force could remove the bars and lead right back to the tunnel we’d originally entered from. So we had a pretty good idea of where we were now.

There was another door on the opposite end of the room, stairs leading upwards that we’d passed in the statue room, or another hall that the previous hall had split out into. We decided we were going to leave the stairs going upwards for last, as that seemed likely to lead to the surface and possibly to where the goblins had come in from. We were not entirely correct in our conclusion, but it still proved to be a very smart call for other reasons I’ll get into shortly.

We decided to continue forward for now, and circle back to the other hall after we’d cleared out this branch of the underground. So we continued onwards, until we came to a terrible room full of implements of torture. It didn’t look like it had been used in centuries, but the implications of what the people who made this place once did was crystal clear. Even in ancient days, this was neither a pleasant nor good place to have been.

There were two doors out, each marked with that star sigil. Nanel checked one door while I checked the other. Nanel heard nothing where he was, but I heard heavy ragged breathing and the distinctive moans of the undead—many undead.

We decided to check Nanel’s door first.

This opened into a mostly empty room, with ruined books and papers strewn about. We did find a scroll that was still in usable condition, which I handed off to Krysa in the hopes they will be able to transcribe it into their spellbook.

We found three more cells, each with skeletons that were terribly deformed. It looked like the end result of a mutagen gone wrong. Or fleshwarping. I hope Laila would forgive me for making the connection, but it really did resemble the end result of some of the worst Drow experiments I’ve read survivors tell about seeing after escaping capture. Too many limbs, a ribcage that takes up half the poor creature’s body, and an enormous head the creature likely couldn’t hold up before it died. Probably in agony.

Whoever did this to them was cruel, and had no regard for the suffering of the creatures they inflicted this fate on. I can understand that sometimes things go wrong when trying to push the boundaries of knowledge. If all experiments went exactly as planned, they wouldn’t be experiments. But to force it upon others is twisted. If knowledge can only be gained through suffering then maybe we do not need that knowledge at all.

But I digress. There was nothing more in that room. Just more death and dust and memories that should remain buried along with those ruins.

So we decided to check the door I had listened at—the one in which we knew many creatures awaited us beyond.

We asked Krysa if they could sneak a little closer and get a look at what we were dealing with. They agreed, and slipped through the door and down the short hall ahead of us. Moments later they returned, their footfalls making virtually no noise. Krysa informed us that there was a strange goblin with three arms and a glowing sword in the middle of a bunch of obvious trap doors. The sounds of the undead were coming from beneath the trap doors.

I suggested Krysa and I take the lead this time, since it sounded like it would be difficult for Nanel and Tabor to safely get close to this unusual goblin. Krysa and I could both attack from afar. The others agreed.

I led the way, and threw an explosive at the three-armed goblin. The wooden traps around him caught fire, and the moaning sounds below grew louder. There was a scrabbling sound, like whatever was below was trying—and failing—to climb.

Krysa followed up with another shot of their crossbow.

For a wizard, they are quite adept at shooting people by non-magical means, I must say.

Tabot and Nanel came in behind us, spreading out and blocking off any means of running past us down the hall.

The goblin howled in rage and leapt across the gaps in the floor to take a swing at me with that glowing sword that looked a tad too large for him. However it scraped harmlessly against the shield I’d put around myself with a formulae before entering the chamber.

The others moved in, and the tragic creature did not get another chance to attack. He fell into one of the pits, landing atop one of the zombies. His glowing blade was dropped just at the lip of the trap, and we offered it up to Tabot. Being the Aroden worshipper and all. A magic longsword just seems like it obviously needs to go to him.

It did not escape my notice that this goblin had the same kind of mutations as those skeletons in the cages. So that means these experiments were not ancient history—they were still happening. They needed to be stopped.

 We contemplated killing the zombies in the pits, but decided we’d come back and do it in a bit—my shield was temporary and it would be best if we got into any more fights with it still up.

We went through the only exit and down a long hall, which split into a fork. There were stairs spiraling downwards. We decided to give it a quick glance and see how much it looked like we’d have to deal with beyond. I was dreading that this was only the first floor of many.

Fortunately, it appeared the stairwell was caved in.

Less fortunately, we heard a distant howling coming from somewhere far, far below.

There was something trapped down there. Possibly something that was trapped there purposely. Maybe it was even the reason this particular ruin was entirely forgotten.

We retreated back down the hall, deciding it was best to let sleeping dogs lie. Or howling dogs, in this case.

We went down the other fork in the hall, and found a curious room. Various objects floated about the room, suspended in the air as if completely weightless and unbound by gravity. Amongst those objects, I saw a scroll, and expressed a desire to take it, as it might be a useful spell scroll. Krysa of all people told me no, they thought that was a reckless idea. They could tell the room had transmutation magic in it, and was concerned it was part of what was turning creatures into those mutants. I was not entirely convinced of that logic, as the mutants had been back in the other room, and this magic seemed unrelated.

Nanel did something quite clever to help determine what we should do. First he tossed a coin into the room. It floated as if weightless, much like the other objects. Then he placed another coin, without any momentum so it was just floating in place, and then a moment later took it back. Nothing happened when he removed an object from the room. He told Krysa that a levitation spell is also transmutation magic, and he believed that was all they were seeing. Based on his experiment, he concluded that was likely the only spell on the room, and that it was safe to remove objects from the room.

With Krysa’s mind eased, we began grabbing objects that looked useful—or expensive.

I grabbed the scroll, which was a Scroll of Burning Hands. Krysa grabbed a Wand of Shocking Grasp. We agreed to trade. I think I can make good use of that spell, as I get into the thick of things more than our rat friend. And then Krysa can add another good spell to their spellbook.

Nanel and Tabot snagged a very ancient (but clearly magically preserved) unholy text to Lamashtu, and a bottle of expensive wine.

That book didn’t bode well, especially given the Abyssal writing we’d seen in other rooms.

In this room, too. There was a band of red metal around the room, which sparked with black electricity, and occasionally seemed to form Abyssal or Thassalonian words. I saw the phrase I’d seen in the other room, about angry screams. And it seemed the phrases we’d seen in other rooms were scattered in as well.

So it seems somehow whatever that band of metal is, it’s sending these messages around the ruin. For some reason. Maybe it’s some kind of defense mechanism, meant to scare off intruders? Maybe it’s not even functioning properly, maybe it was meant to do something different but now all it does is spew out these phrases after thousands of years with no upkeep. Who knows?

We’d finally hit a dead end on this particular branch of the ruin. There was nothing left to do but turn back and choose another path we’d yet to clear. So we went back to the hall just before the room where we’d fought the two Sinspawn, and ventured down the hall we hadn’t yet travelled.

At the end of this hall was something not half foreboding. A shrine to the Mother of Monsters, Lamashtu. Any statue that had one stood there was long gone, but there was still a basin of fetid water at its base that Tabot warned us not to go near. He sounded really legitimately shaken by it, and I don’t much want to find out what happens if you mess with a Demon Lord’s shrine, so I kept my distance.

There was only one exit from this room. The air felt heavy and I think we all wanted out of this room as soon as possible—Tabot especially. The door in question had a heavy padlock sealing it closed, but we’d found a large key in the room with the mutant goblin, so we easily put two and two together.

I listened at the door first, and heard nothing. With the heavy lock in place, I believed it was likely nothing had been in or out of this room in a long time. So all we would have to do was sweep it quickly to make sure there was nothing left so we could honestly say we’d cleared everything out.

Oh how wrong I was.

When I opened the door, the room did, indeed, appear empty.

Before I could take a step inside, however, the air beside me shimmered. A summoning spell came to completion, and a goblin dog appeared directly to my left. Then a shrieking voice called out to us, ‘how dare we intrude on Her domain’—strangely it sounded like she was speaking the Catfolk tongue, but given that the others understood her as well I suspect Tongues to be the culprit.

A small creature with a feminine figure, curved horns, and bat-like wings appeared before a strange glowing pool of liquid on a platform above us across the room. Krysa identified her as a quasit, a type of demon. The demoness cut her hand and let the blood leak into the boiling pool. And from it, another Sinspawn emerged.

So it would seem she is the one behind those.

Before I could react, she flung a spell at me. I could feel my muscles try to lock up, but I willed my body to continue working through the effects of the spell. If I could will myself to walk on my bad leg for so many years, willing myself to move is child’s play.

And good thing too, because that goblin dog came for my throat. I dodged, and it only got my arm, but that would have been bad if I’d been unable to move. I backed away from the vicious hairless beast, then tossed an explosive at it in response.

Unfortunately, doing so took my eyes off the Sinspawn, which moved faster than I’d expected. Suddenly it was behind me and I felt a ranseur driven into my side. While I wasn’t looking a second Sinspawn had been created as well. And the tiny demoness wouldn’t be done creating these creatures until that pool quit its ominous glow—which only happened after four of those monstrosities had been birthed from those boiling waters.

The others weren’t slouching in helping to try to clear their numbers, though. Tabot and I stood side-by-side against two Sinspawn, while Nanel took care of two more with Krysa backing him up from the doorway. Things actually felt like they were going well, despite the numbers not being in our favor.

Then the little demoness Hex’d Tabot, causing him to drop his defenses, allowing a Sinspawn’s ranseur to hit its mark. A second Hex, and the paladin slumped over in a magic-induced slumber.

I was of two minds—the Sinspawn nearest Tabot was badly hurt, and Nanel was nearby. In theory either I could kill it, or Nanel could interrupt an attempt to kill the helpless paladin.

In theory.

I decided I didn’t like the odds. Instead, I slapped Tabot awake. He could take a cat nap later.

This apparently enraged the Sinspawn that very much was going to kill Tabot before, and it unleased its anger on me. I was forced to retreat behind Tabot to heal myself, as I think I had more blood in my fur than in my body.

Tabot managed to stand without the spawn surrounding him skewering him in response, his shield deflecting any attempt. Nanel was holding his own against the spawn he was fighting well—biting then retreating to stab with the ranseur. He is surprisingly mobile for a man of his size, and his tactic staying on the move seemed to be working incredibly well for him. Not to mention Krysa, who got first blood on the Quasit by tossing a magic missile at her.

Unfortunately, it would seem we were doing too well for her liking. Suddenly an aura of dread flowed through the room. In front of me, Tabot went rigid. I didn’t see Krysa—but that’s because they’d already run before I looked. A moment later Tabot had darted off as well.

Leaving me and Nanel alone.

I stepped to his side, to face the remaining Sinspawn back-to-back so we didn’t get any more nasty surprises.

Any bad feelings that were lingering weren’t important in that moment. All that mattered was that we both made it out of this alive—and preferably that the Quasit did not.

We had no way to harm her in the air. Her thick hide was too fire-resistant for my bombs, and Nanel didn’t have any means of fighting from a distance. Even if Krysa and Tabot hadn’t been seen into a magically induced panic, Krysa’s crossbow wasn’t strong enough to pierce her hide, and Tabot had dropped his shortbow and decided he only needed his sword somewhere along the way.

So the only way she was coming into range of my blade and Nanel’s ranseur was if her rage and pride were enough to goad her into it.

Nanel slayed a Sinspawn, his mouth somehow opening wide enough to fit its entire head inside before biting down.

I’m…not entirely sure what Nanel is. Because I don’t think he is entirely human. Humans cannot dislocate their law and open it wide enough to eat an entire living creature whole, as I have seen him do. I’m sure he would explain it as a boon from his deity—patron—thing—but that explanation can only go so far. If a worshipper of Lamashtu is warped beyond recognition by their god’s ‘boons’, they are called a monster. So what do you call Nanel if he is changed so much he is no longer recognizably human?

I don’t know. I don’t think I can answer that question. I don’t know if it’s even a fair question to ask.

I might have transformations into monsters on my mind tonight. Just a little. Between the mutant goblin, the shrine to Lamashtu, whatever is going on with Nanel, and…something else I haven’t quite gotten to yet. Something I’m not looking forward to committing to paper. It’s not been a good day, to say the least.

Anyways. Where was I? Yes, right. Nanel and I were fighting the three remaining Sinspawn. When thankfully Tabot and Krysa snapped out of their panic. Tabot charged down the hall and sliced through a Sinspawn that had been unlucky enough to have positioned itself in the doorway. A bolt shot past him, so although I couldn’t see Krysa in the next room, clearly the little rat had snapped out of it as well and was now taking pot shots at the Sinspawn.

The tide was turning back in our favor. And it seems that finally made the quasit snap. She dove from her place in the air and dug her claws into Nanel. The claws themselves didn’t seem to leave much of an injury, but the wound was a nasty shade, like she’d injected something into the blood.

I remembered one of the things Krysa had rattled off in the chaos of battle about Quasits. They have venomous claws. We would need to see Father Zantus about healing Nanel when all was said and done.

For now, however, she had put herself into position to finally be attacked. I darted in and tried to pin her wings so she couldn’t fly away, but she spun in the air and avoided my blade. Now I found myself on a pile of human skulls, fighting a demoness outside of a Shrine of Lamashtu. Sounds like it could be an art piece. Too bad reality was all terror and bloodshed instead of glory and heroics.

Tabot darted around and got a devastating sword swing on her. The tell-tale glow of a paladin’s Smite engulfed her with the attack, the holy energy burning the unholy creature.

Nanel repositioned around her, snapping at her and then swinging with his ranseur.

I felt a searing pain in my shoulder as the last remaining Sinspawn bit me and dragged its claws down my shield. I felt a flash of rage—everything that had happened in the last week boiling over. The loss of my home and place of work, threats on my life and actual near-death experiences, seeing horrific things I should only have to face in my nightmares. And then as quickly as it flared up, I snuffed it out. Anger had a time and a place, and this wasn’t it. Maybe when I was younger, I would have succumbed. Let bitterness take the reins, run the show, burn everything down just to get a hint of attention from the world.

But not now.

Krysa took care of the monstrosity at my back, and I helped slash through the demon in return.

The Quasit looked scared now. I didn’t know demons could be scared, if I’m being honest. She tried to cast a spell, but her focus was lost as she also tried to defend herself against any incoming attack we attempted.

That opening was all it took. Nanel skewered the demoness, called her a shish kabob, and then…well, ate her.

I’m no doctor, but surely eating demons and Sinspawn isn’t good for one’s health? One is a horrific experiment of a bygone age embodying human sin, and the other is the metaphysical embodiment of all mortal sin.

I did not bring it up to Nanel, but he did at some point mention something about having incredibly strong stomach acid.

Anyways, while I was licking my wounds, the others examined the room. Especially that boiling pool, which was no longer glowing. They identified it as a Minor Runewell. It would seem it’s an artifact that is charged when a particularly wrathful soul dies within a certain radius, and charges of it are used to create Sinspawn. Its radius also included Sandpoint, which we think has something to do with why the town seems so ‘cursed’ with violence and misfortune in recent years.

Tabot believed he knew how to destroy the Minor Runewell permanently, however, so it wouldn’t be a blight on the town any longer. It would have to be filled with boiling holy water for at least a full day and night to purify it.

That was not something we had time for, however. Perhaps Father Zantus or another priest in town could spare the time to watch over the destruction of this artifact in our absence. We’d killed this demoness, but there was still no hint of where Nualia was or where the goblins had come from, which had to be our priority.

The underground was virtually completely cleared out, the only place we hadn’t poked around yet were the stairs leading up that we’d planned to save for last. So, with the demoness dead, we ventured upwards, not thinking anything left lurking down here could possibly be worse than a Quasit and four Sinspawn.

That’s when we wandered into the torture chamber, and the Vargouille attacked.

It swooped down at us with a screech that resonated in my head and my bones and every fiber of my body. Despite what I said earlier about being able to will myself to move, this time I was frozen in place and at the horror’s mercy.

Tabot was the only person ahead of me in the hall—as Nanel was in no state to take the lead with all the poison the Quasit had pumped into his veins, and obviously Krysa wasn’t going to be in front to risk being the first target of attacks. Tabot, with his shield in hand, made the most sense to take point. Tabot stood steady, his shield held to block the creature from getting into the hall.

Unfortunately, the Vargouille was quick in the air. Tabot took a swing at it, but it still flew over him and straight at me. I felt its clammy skin press against mine in a mockery of a kiss, and when it pulled away it left a feeling of icy cold behind as it devoured something from within me.

I couldn’t move, couldn’t do anything to signal to any of the others that something had been done to me, but my racing mind could still think. I could try to remember what I had read about Vargouilles in the past.

What I remembered only stoked my panic further. If a Vargouille can render its prey helpless, it will administer a deadly kiss which over the course of 24 hours—sometimes much sooner—will transform the victim into another Vargouille. Killing the victim and leaving only the cursed monstrosity behind.

I was trapped in my own frozen body as I panicked and tried to fight against the paralysis. I had to get out of here. I had to get into the sun immediately. And then get a cure. Sunlight would slow the rate of the transformation—the curse did not progress as long as the victim was in direct sunlight. Which meant if I got out of the damnable ruin and the cave which housed it, I could buy myself time. Hours of time. Enough time to get a cure.

My first thought was Father Zantus. But the magic required to cure this was fairly powerful—beyond the reach of most small-town priests. So my next option was to hope that Vin had a scroll of Remove Disease in stock at his item shop—or could get one in before it was too late for me.

My mind was too preoccupied to really see how the fight with the Vargouille went. I don’t remember seeing a corpse so maybe Nanel ate it as well, I don’t know. The moment my body snapped back into my control I could feel the actual panic attack coming on, and I told the others I needed to get to the surface. Immediately.

The others, bless them, didn’t ask any questions. They immediately made a beeline for the top of the stairs, thinking it would be the quickest way out. Nanel even carried me. My pride might normally be a little bruised, but honestly right that moment I couldn’t care less, I needed to get into the sunlight as quickly as possible and honestly not being on my bad leg right that moment was a welcome relief.

Unfortunately, the stairs up led to another cave-in.

We didn’t wait around listening for sounds or thinking about if we could dig it out. We just immediately turned around and retraced our steps back to the Glassworks, and finally outside.

Once I was safely in the light of day and breathing fresh air, I had to take a moment to collect myself. I felt moments away from emptying my stomach right there in front of the Glassworks. It was hard to breath—it had been ever since the paralysis was undone.

But slowly I got my breathing back under control, and my heart didn’t feel like it was going to hammer out of my chest. Then I finally explained to the others what I had realized about Vargouilles—about what my fate would ultimately be if we couldn’t find a cure. I rambled a bit in my state, but got around to the point that I hoped that Vin might have a scroll we could make use of. Hopefully within our budget.

The others agreed we should go to the shop immediately, and Nanel carried me again. I was too tired to protest. My battered pride can recover another day.

And thank Shelyn and any other god that will listen (even Aroden if he’s really out there), Vin did have one scroll in stock. It was pricy, but we’d found enough treasures down in the ruins to make for a fair trade.

I handed the scroll off to Nanel. Scrolls aren’t really my area of expertise—alchemy might look like magic to some, and I can even logic out certain formulae from the arcane writings of wizards, but they are still two very different arts at their core. There’s a hint of familiarity to scrolls, but not enough for me to reliably make use of them.

This wouldn’t be in Krysa’s wheelhouse, either. The arcane and the divine don’t really…mesh, usually. And curing diseases or healing wounds with positive energy is not generally the sort of thing that can be translated into a wizard’s arcane powers.

Nanel, on the other hand, is a divine spellcaster. Of a sort. Not quite a cleric, but I suspected he should still have the basic knowledge necessary to use this kind of scroll.

He seemed a bit uncertain, but he read from the scroll anyways. And I felt something that I hadn’t quite noticed, something cold and oily, be banished from my chest—from where it had been clinging to my very soul. I hugged Nanel as tightly as I could and thanked him.

He, in no uncertain terms, saved my life. We’re even for what happened at the Glassworks and then some.

All three of them did everything they could to help me during that—even before they knew what was wrong, they jumped into action and got me outside with no questions asked.

I don’t think I have ever had anyone have my back like that before, besides my family. I am…caught a little by surprise, to be honest. Don’t get me wrong, I liked the others just fine—disregarding any sore feelings towards Nanel at the time—but past experience taught me that only a very few, very special handful of people would bother with a disabled old cat like me beyond whatever they might need from me.

My brother was left for dead by his people—by his first family—because his wing was deformed. My sister might have ended up just like Nualia, treated like a holy object instead of a person, if she hadn’t had the sheer luck of being adopted by our mothers instead of one of the churches. My other sister, I don’t even know why the drow abandoned her on the surface, but she’s always been treated with suspicion by people up here. Even though she’s just a teen, and she’s never done anything worse than any other kid her age. Well, the human equivalent to her age.

Our mothers wanted us to be ready for the world, and wanted us to face it with optimism and faith in people—and I have tried to live by that. But at the same time, time and time again, it always comes down to us only having each other to rely on.

So…yes, it took me by surprise that the others helped without a single question, that they just trusted that something was truly wrong and decided that they were going to help fix it, even before they knew what it actually was. They could have kept clearing out the ruins—there were still those undead in the holes, and there was the stairway up to check further. They could have sent me on my way to get up to the surface on my own while they handled things down there like they promised Ameiko. And I could have made it on my own. It would have been slower, and more painful, and I don’t think I would have come down from my panic near as well without people there—but I would have managed, if I'd had to.

I’m not even sure what I’m trying to say. I’m still trying to wrap my head around it. They’re good people. With Tabot I suppose that’s a given, he really does his best to embody what a paladin is meant to be. But the other two, they’re good people too. Not everyone would have done what they did for me today. I won’t forget it.

[mikuni14]

Be My Favorite Ep 6

Every episode of BMF impresses me with how realistic it is. Most of what happens in this show has either been experienced by me or I’ve seen it happen to someone else. The conversations are so real and have a natural flow. This is the kind of cinematography that I love the most, where it doesn't matter if the production is about time travel, sci-fi, ancient Rome. If the production has a logical plot and is universal on the principle that as a human being I can see myself or other different than me people in it, even if the story is crazy, I'll love it 💖

I noticed that in each episode of BMF I focus on something else, this time it was struggling with the problem of a sick family member. Everything Kawi went through in this episode is painfully real, and I think a lot of people will find themselves in those situations. Being sick with worry, the financial aspect of it all, long queues for treatments, euphoria of finding a quicker solution, how to start a converstation about it and not sound stupid, or like a beggar, to not ruin it?, humiliation when you have to ask for money, for a chance for your loved one TO LIVE, how rich people are detached from this humiliating reality (I fully understand Kawi running away from that dinner, his lashing out on Pisaeng, when Pear cutely asks her father to help Kawi's father as if she were asking him for money to buy new shoes, not to save someone's life), discouragement and wanting to give up and finally, gritting your teeth, forgetting about the dignity and literally begging for help. And Kawi's conversation with his father, who is so stubborn, and whines and doesn't want to go to the doctor because "everything is fine" and "worry about yourself".... I don't know if there is anyone in the world who hasn't had such a conversation with their father they care about 😤😅

When Max said he liked what the politician was saying, my first thought was: oh my sweet summer child. But then I remembered he's only about 20, so that's understandable. The whole conversation between Pisaeng and his mother (and the politician in question) was very interesting. And I wasn't even very angry with her, because this woman IS a politician and unfortunately that's what it looks like. Is what she's doing to her son wrong? Absolutely. But sadly, that's the reality. Somehow I immediately remembered a sentence, I think it was from the series My Gear And Your Gown, it went something like this: parents are okay with this whole LGBT thing, as long as it’s not about their children. Who Piseang is, including his sexual orientation, can affect his mother's political career, so he is placed under surveillance. She’s accepting towards other people from the community, she also accepts her son, but she looks at him not only as a mother, but also as a politician. Again, the series showed the reality without sugarcoating. From time to time, stories from the family life of the famous politicians break through the news, their hypocrisy in saying one thing and doing something else. BMF does it quite gently anyway, and the mother is shown as a liberal person, while in reality, often in conservative environments, children’s life (not only LGBT, simply DIFFERENT than the ideal with which you can pose for a photo) is a nightmare. 

What else? With sort of motherly fondness, I watched my boy Kawi "I'm totally in love with Pear and totally straight" as he accepts another guy's feelings, talks to him about those feelings, asks him about them, touches that guy, plays with his hair, kisses him, lets him do other things (although he lies like a log and looks like he “closed his eyes and thinks about England” lol, ok I know he's drunk but it’s just so funny). Yes Kawi, you are definitely in love with a woman and nothing LGBT happens to you at all. You almost convinced us all. 

I was afraid that upset Pear would agree to a go on a “date” with Not just because he talked to her. Fortunately, the girl knows her worth and I hope she will know it for the rest of her life. The converstation about Kawi's orientation was HORRIBLE. Not started it probably to stop Pear’s potentially budding feelings for Kawi, which just proves how awful he is. Anyway, it was so wrong and gross.

✨Kawi is still my beloved, ‘perfect in how imperfect he is’, struggling boy, ✨Piseang is still my beloved, ‘perfect in how he appears to be perfect, but is in fact imperfect’, lonely boy. Both are great, I haven't seen such interesting, compelling characters in a long time, I’m so happy 🥺 

I like everything about this series. 💖💖💖💖💖💖💖

[curseplay]

7 16 17 and 19 🫡

intimate headcanon questions. [ ACCEPTING. ]

07. how to they view sexual intimacy and love?

top ten things i could write an entire essay on if i wanted to. i'll say to start that paris' number one desire in her entire life and every area of her life is to be beloved, and that desire bleeds majorly into her views re: intimacy and love. as a teen/young adult, especially a deeply queer one, she spent a long time thinking that both of these things were entirely out of reach for her. as a result of outcasting herself for her differences, she grows up feeling deeply unattractive and inherently unlovable to the point where she kind of sort of accepts that she's going to be alone forever until she makes a change. and so she runs away. and while on the road, she begins to make changes to her appearance, which makes her more confident, which leads to people actually expressing interest in her. she has no idea how to deal with this, so she falls absolutely headfirst into every opportunity she gets. and then she gets famous, which means now masses of people are cheering for her, wanting to be her, and wanting to be with her. once again, she indulges, often to the point of her own detriment. she has a long history of being considered a "player" of sorts, but most of these relationships were actually rather one-sided, with her partners just being attracted to her, and her often mistaking sex for love or using sex to get over not feeling loved. her view of both intimacy and love get warped significantly after achieving fame and dating whitney, who hands her a lot of psychological and sexual trauma. she sees intimacy as a vehicle to achieve being beloved, but there's a difference between that adoration she wants and actual love. that actual love (the kind that makes intimacy an actual healthy and fun experience) feels evasive to her for a very long time. it's people like lauren, andie, and eventually mina that help her unlearn those behaviors and view both things through a healthier lens.

16. how vocal is your muse when intimate?

answered here!

17. how confident is your muse in expressing their desires?

pre-fame, not confident at all. she would do whatever anyone else wanted her to do with little regard for what she preferred (as seen mostly with whitney). this people pleaser attitude in an integral part of her no matter what, but after the first album cycle and her breakup, her confidence grows, and she has no trouble at all expressing what she wants. in fact, she may come off as cocky on occasion because of her comfort level. everything she does is a kind of vindication for her younger self that couldn't be open about her wants/needs.

19. how does your muse feel about eye contact during sex?

she's offended you would even ask this. she's a fan mostly because she's very hard to fluster, and is able to do so consistently without getting overwhelmed and having to look away (unless you're mina who makes her extremely weak and has a greater chance of getting her all pink in the face). also loves the connection aspect it brings and is big on similar things (holding hands, etc.) during.

[believesthings]

The sweetest words // Jason sudeikis x F!reader

A/N: AHHH. It’s finally here. Later than I expected, but it’s here nonetheless. Is this fic basically just an excuse for me to write a giant love letter to Jason sudeikis? Yes. But I hope you love it even if it is probably the cheesiest thing I’ve ever created.

Jason strides to be a pretty private person. Especially considering what he’s been through the last couple years with the media and his previous relationship. So when he settles into a relationship with you, a person who isn’t famous, he’s extra cautious.

You’ve never been a big fan of being the center of attention, so you’re a little nervous about a wedding and the idea of everyone staring at you. Jason has made it clear to you time and time again that you don’t have to have a wedding if you aren’t comfortable with it.

“Baby, the number one priority for me is that when this is all said and done, I get to call you my wife. As long as that’s the endgame, the journey to get there doesn’t matter.”

You hear him, you do. And you know he means it but you don’t like the idea of giving up the wedding entirely just because of nerves and sweet little daisy is so excited about her daddy marrying you. One day, in the early stages of wedding planning, she saw you looking at wedding dresses online and she immediately wanted to help. Jason walked in to find the two of you huddled over your laptop screen whispering furiously back and forth between each other.

“Whatcha doing?” Your head snapped up, both of you were so lost in your own world, you didn’t even hear him come in.

“Looking at wedding dresses!” Daisy declares proudly.

Jason can’t help but smile at his daughter’s obvious enthusiasm. He’s beyond thrilled that his kids have accepted you into their lives. He loves that Otis and daisy love you just as much as he does. It only confirms for him that he’s making the right call in marrying you.

“Oh yeah? Is that right? Maybe I need to take a look too.” He’s quick but his daughter is quicker.

“No! Dad you’re not supposed to see the dress.” She slamming your laptop closed before he can blink. “She’s gonna look like a princess!”

“Oh Dais, come on. She looks like a princess every day.” He leans down and drops a kiss on your forehead.

You and Jason eventually reach an agreement when it comes to the wedding, you assure him that you’re fine having a ceremony but the only thing you’re truly concerned about are the vows. You love the idea of writing your own vows to express your love for Jason but you and public speaking had never been the best combination. So you both agree: there will be a ceremony during which you will recite the typical ‘til death do us part’ vows. Then, afterwards, in the privacy of your own space, you’ll share your personal written vows with each other.

You were worried jason wouldn’t like the idea or would think you were being ridiculous but he (thankfully) seemed to agree that it was a wonderful plan. He didn’t want everyone to be privy to your business. You could have the wedding, the outlets would get their headline, but the personal aspects of it, the true feelings of your marriage, would stay where they belong: between husband and wife and - most importantly, no one would get to comment on it.

As it turns out, the ceremony is actually pretty easy considering that it’s a pretty private affair. A room of your closest friends and family, people that both you and Jason have learned to become incredibly comfortable around over the years.

Between all the congratulations and the hugging, you manage to slip out to the restroom for a breather.

“Hey there. Everything okay?”

You turn and there he is, your gorgeous husband, standing in the doorway, looking gorgeous as ever.

You let out an exaggerated gasp and place your hand on your chest, “Well as I live and breathe, famous comedian and actor Jason sudeikis! Whatever are you doing here?”

He rolls his eyes playfully at you, “well believe it or not I’m actually here getting married.” He holds up his hand and wiggles his ring ringer at you.

You hold up your hand, doing the same. “What a coincidence, so am I. So, tell me about your wife. She anything special?”

“Ehh, too soon to tell. What about your husband? he any good?”

“He’s alright. But there’s always room for improvement.”

His hands find their way to your hips while his lips start kissing your neck. “Well, it sounds like he should get to work then. Practice makes perfect, you know.”

He felt impossibly good. He always did and even after all your time with him, you’re not sure how he managed to do it.

“Jase.” You manage to get out, rather breathlessly.

“Mhmm?” He hums against your skin.

You manage to pull yourself from him. “Jason, we need to get back. Once people start to notice that we’re both gone, they’ll think we’re having sex.”

“Oh, great idea. Let’s do that.”

“Jason!” You gasp at him.

“What? We might as well do it since everyone thinks we’re doing it anyway.”

“As tempting as you are, husband of mine. We really shouldn’t keep everyone waiting.” You kiss him softly one last time and murmur against his lips, “I promise later, you can have me for as long as you want in as many ways as you wish.”

He fumbles for his phone retrieving it from his pocket, you watch him, biting his lip and opening his voice memos app, “if it pleases the court, could you just repeat that last sentence for me one more time, right here into the mic?”

You roll your eyes and grab his hand. “Come on, dork. We have a wedding to get back to.”

You can confidently say that you don’t understand the idea of sex on your wedding night. You’re fucking exhausted. Jason is insistent on doing the typical carrying you bridal style move, so you’ve taken to pressing soft kisses against his neck as he moves you into the bedroom.

“Jase?”

“Yeah baby?”

“I know I promised incredible sex - and I do intend to have incredible, mind blowing, married sex with you but do you think we could take a nap first?”

He halts his movements and stares down directly at you. You both stay like that, eyes searching one another, until he finally breaks the spell.

“I would love nothing more, you have no idea.” He smiles down at you, laying you down on the bed. Standing above you, he carefully removes his clothing. You’ve always been amazed at how attractive Jason truly is. He seems to brush you off when you mention it. You have to assume that he’s just being humble, there’s no way he doesn’t know. He has a tendancy to deflect with jokes or trying to shine the attention on others instead of sitting in praise for himself. It was one of the things that became apparent to you in your first year together.

“Who the hell is responsible for making these decisions anyway?”

Jason smirks and looks over at you, “Some overpaid executive, I’m sure.”

“Well, this entire thing is a scam. I can’t believe more people aren’t talking about it.”

Jason stops what he’s doing. His hands hovering in mid air, before he begins laughing. “You think the People magazine sexiest man alive campaign is a scam?”

You wave your hands aggressively at the TV screen. “No. I don’t think the sexiest man alive campaign is a scam. I know the sexiest man alive campaign is a scam.”

Jason looks at you, awestruck. “Explain.”

You look between him and the TV before finally speaking, “I know it’s a scam because you’ve never won.”

Jason looks down at his fidgeting fingers but you can see the light blush lingering under the living room lighting. “Well that’s sweet of you to say but I mean, come on, I can’t compete with that.” He gestures to the magazine cover on the screen, featuring an A-List actor leaning against the wall of some fancy L.A. mansion, the outline of a six pack peeking through a particularly tight v-neck shirt. It’s a conveniently nice image, sure. And while Jason may think you’re trying to appease him, it’s an image that really doesn’t do anything for you. It’s too airbrushed, too sculpted, too everything but what you need.

You glance over at jason, studying him in profile. His greying temples that you can’t help but find incredibly sexy, facial hair that tickles when he kisses you, chest hair peaking out of the buttons of his own shirt that gets you heated unlike anything else. Shoulders that he seems to carry the weight of the world on some days. Arms that simultaneously carry strength and solace. Strength that can lift his children up when he plays with them on a Sunday afternoon, solace that can tuck you into his embrace when the cold is just a little too bitter. Strength that can carry your fears and insecurities and solace that can make them come undone when he gets you alone.

You turn back to the television, missing the smile on his face, when you say, “you could compete with that Jason and if it were up to anyone with taste, you would win.”

Jason hovers his face over yours. “Penny for your thoughts, Mrs. Sudeikis?”

You smile up at him and lean up to give him a kiss. “Just thinking about how handsome you are, Mr. Sudeikis.”

He kisses you lightly before tucking you into his chest. “Come on, let’s get some sleep.”

You really were tired, your eyes drooping closed once you settled you were settled. “Goodnight husband.” Dropping another light kiss to his chest before sleep took you.

“Goodnight wife.” He whispers back before falling into a slumber of his own.

You were awoken with kisses to your shoulder blade. “Hey there, gorgeous.”

“Hi.”

“Did you sleep well?”

You nod your head dramatically at him. “Yes. Married sleep is definitely better than normal sleep.”

“So..” he leans over and opens the bedside cabinet drawer, pulling out a folded up piece of paper. “I think it’s vow time. What do you say?”

“Okay.”

You both get settled on the bed, sitting across from one another. Jason speaks up, “ladies first.”

Writing your vows for Jason was probably one of the hardest things you’ve ever had to do. How do you find the words to incapsulate all your feelings that you hold for him? You stressed for weeks about making them perfect and funnily enough, Otis was the one person that was able to talk some sense into you about the whole thing.

“Why should it matter if you say everything? You can just tell him the other stuff later.” He said to you one day at the kitchen counter.

And really, he did have a point. That’s what a marriage was, right? It was forever. You had your whole life to tell Jason how you felt. At the end of the day, these vows and the paper they were written on were just the beginning. You had a lifetime to fit in everything else.

Still, Jason knew you better than anyone else and he seemed to sense the nerves brimming under the surface.

“Hey, it’s just you and me, yeah? No need to be scared.” He lifts your hand to his lips and presses a kiss to your wrist.

“Yeah. Okay.” You unfold the paper in your lap and clear your throat, read aloud.

“When I was a kid and all my friends were talking about getting married, they always seemed to focus on the wedding part. Talking about dresses and flowers but that part never appealed the me as much. I was much more concerned with my name. When I would develop a crush on a new guy I would roll this last name around in my head and try to decide if I thought it was a good fit. Whenever I told this to my friends they didn’t seem to understand why it mattered so much to me. They always told me that I didn’t actually have to change my last name if it bothered me so much. Obviously, I knew that but I wanted to. I like the idea of taking the last name of my love. It seemed symbolic to me. It was a way to say that we’re a team, I know I always have you in my corner and we can tackle all of life’s challenges together. I had very particular criteria for acceptable last names, I didn’t want anything too funny or clunky, nothing that rhymed too close to my own name. By the time I had reached high school I had developed a list of names that were tolerable, that was admittedly embarrassingly short.”

“I was venting out all of this to my father one day - and at the end of my speech about marriages and last names, he didn’t say anything for a while. I thought he wasn’t going to speak at all. Until finally, he said ‘I see where you’re coming from, I do. But I think you’ll find when you’re in love - truly, decidedly in love, that the name won’t matter to you.’ I don’t think I quite understood what he meant at the time but now, on the other side of it all, he was right. I’m happy to be Mrs. Sudeikis. I’m proud to be Mrs. Sudeikis.

You are the love of my life. You’re my favorite person in the room no matter where we go. I love you. I get to love you. For life. And it’s the best thing I’ll ever do. There is nothing that is more important to me than your love and your time. The way you’ve loved me has changed me. I’ll spend the rest of my life proud to share your name. A marriage is as strong as you make it and I think, the two of us, are going to make a pretty everlasting one.”

He leans in and kisses you. When you open your eyes, you can see his teary eyed ones gazing back at you before he clears his throat. “Damn. I’m starting to think I may have underdelivered.” He says waving his own hand written vows in the air between you.

You roll your eyes at him. “Oh please. You’re the award winning writer, not me. But if it helps, your son actually gave me some pretty excellent advice.”

“Really? What would that be?”

While repeating his son’s words back to him, Jason can’t help but laugh. “Smart kid. Still have no idea where the hell he gets it from.”

He unfolds his own paper and you take his hand and press a kiss to his wrist. “Okay. You ready?”

You nod enthusiastically.

“In the interest of full disclosure, I was having a terrible day when I met you. I was in the middle of a huge project that I had taken on completely on my own. My mind was locked into a work fueled tunnel vision thinking about the million little tasks that needed to be completed that rested on my shoulders if they wanted to get done. I’ve grown really bad about this, often neglecting myself in the process and, I fear, extending that neglect out to the people who love me.”

“My children have always been the best judge of character and they seemed to know that I loved you even before I did. One time a woman had asked them what my type was and they screamed out your name, telling her if it wasn’t you, I wasn’t interested. I don’t think she knew what to do with that and honestly, at the time, I didn’t either. But looking back on it, they were right. I just didn’t know it yet.”

“It’s almost like a magic trick to me, how you can fight to guide me through those tunnels when I bury myself deep within them. Just like my children did, you seem to know what I need before I do. Whether it be sitting me in conversation and understanding when I need it or silence when I don’t. I don’t think I thank you enough for that. It’s not lost on me that being able to do that and make it seem so effortless takes a certain level of kindness and patience, which never seems to be in short supply with you. You hold my heart in your hands and you treat it with a compassion that I’m not always sure I deserve but yet, you offer it so openly anyway.”

“Every room you’re in, it’s like the sun comes out. Whether you’re tucked away in the corner or whether we’re skin to skin. There’s a light, a comfort and ease that occupies the space between. So much of my time feels like a performance. The actor, the writer, the funny guy. And even when I’m not working, I’m usually in dad mode. I’m always something to somebody every hour of the day. But with you, I just get to be Jason. And to be perfectly honest with you, baby, that was something I thought I lost a long time ago.

“It’s a reminder that I have to give myself. That the only things that really matter are me and the people I love. As long as I have those people that continually are willing to show me how much they care, happiness will find it’s way into my life and it will be comfortable, just the way it should be. I feel loved and because of that I feel peace and through that peace, I feel hope. A hope that I haven’t had in a long time. A hope that you, through your care for me, put back into my life. I probably can’t promise you much. But I know that I’m so grateful for the love that you have for me and for my children. And I want to spend every day, sharing that hope you’ve given me, so that you can feel the same peace in your life that you’ve placed into mine. I love you and I want you to be happy and through this marriage, I want to make sure you feel that everyday.”

Before he can fully fold his paper back up, you’re kissing him. You pull apart briefly to say, “if that was you underdelivering, i don’t think my heart could handle you when you’re really putting in an effort.”

You sit in silence for a while, taking each other in before Jason breaks the silence. “So… about this incredible, mind blowing, married sex that I was promised.”

You feign innocence. “Did I promise that? I don’t remember.”

He pulls you down onto the mattress, hovering over you. “See, I knew I should have gotten you to repeat it into the mic.”

[heliconcarpet]

Any Port in a Storm | summer

Chapter : 1 of 5

Relationship : Trafalgar Law x Gn!Reader childhood friend

Summary : Before the warlords title, or while he became a mastermind of any crucial incident, like the downfall of two sea emperors, Trafalgar Law was only a boy who was looking for his dear childhood friend through North Blue into the New World. It's what he seeks that is seeking him.

.

" Why worry too much about the daisies, (Name)? " 

" And you! Why are you minding your time in the death frog? "

Law only shrugs his shoulders in response to your question. He is about to go back to focus on the unconscious frog aka the death one. You start thinking about how many pity frogs he caught just to fulfill his dream of becoming a famous surgeon. Although as a kid you admire Law's determination in surgery, perhaps the family environment influenced him a lot. Compared with Law, you'd likely work in the right brain area, which is all about the structural aspects of the imagination. You're way better at expressing yourself through painting. You once were Law's volunteer doing the frog anatomies doodle in his little notebook. It's almost full of your painting. Add a bright color here and there. Since then, you two almost proclaimed being a whole part of the brain, he as the left area, and you as the right area of the brain.

" Law, I was wondering if all my paintings had become real, like, they were alive out of the drawing book! " 

" Well, now you're going to tell me about having the magic crayons or your other painting tools? " 

" Imagine it, Law, in case your notebook with the colorful doodle I've made becomes alive. It does change the world! People would love every medical encyclopedia we made. Compare the dull explanation in the white - black bored medical books you always read! " 

" Brilliant, " Law, as usual, does not amuse in your artsy stuff. "Now, (Name), could you please give some color in these parts? Thank you. " He ended the little unlogical chitchat by passing his notebook to you.

Law did not understand art or the painting days you constantly blabbered about, but he did enjoy and be pleasant even, when you accompanied him on his medical nerd days. In fact, Law and you play side by side as a whole, a gestalt. You two are as simple as the purest childhood best friends you've ever had. Count the number of times you've been the adorable stickers, inseparable. The innocence of love, like in a daisy field, has bloomed.

___________________

It was a school holiday break when summer came in Flevance that year. You have some plans to visit the downtown area by 11 a.m with your mother. Specifically, the flower encyclopedia you've been dreaming of is going to be in your hands. You made a maximal effort to save money to buy it one day, and that day has arrived. Before leaving the house and heading to the bookstore, you might even do a little preparation by emptying some spaces in the rack. You grin from ear to ear until your face aches. You'd finished cleaning the rack when your mother on the first floor yelled at you, and the excitement you'd built since the morning vanished.

Your mother couldn't accompany you to buy your dream encyclopedia. It's enough to turn you into a whining baby when you complain about this and that to her, so she has a backup plan for you. She adds, "Why not ask Law for help, since the Trafalgar family were your neighbors?". Geez, it will always be the case that where there is you, there is Law, or vice versa. Law was already standing in front of your house's door minutes after your mother shut down the Denden mushi. Sometimes you wonder if the only time you have left is for Law's existence for you. In a hurry, she placed a straw hat with a hint of yellow ribbon on your head, saying only that it was a precautionary measure to keep you from the summer heat.

" (Name) Dear, watch your step! Don't give Law a trouble and direct to the home once you've done it. Thank you, Law. Please accept my apologies for unexpectedly requesting your assistance. Stay safe on the way to the bookstore! " She told me and greets Law.

" No problem, Mrs. (surname), well, we are going now! Come on, (Name)! " Law give a hand to stand on when you finish tightening the shoelaces. Your eyes meet Law's but notice how weird his mushroom hat position is. It shows how in a hurry he was when on his way to pick you up. At least you stopped Law's step by fixing the mushroom hat, until it looked like symmetry. 

" And, your hat looks neat now! ". As a kid, at 8 years old, you didn't understand how the gesture you just made caused his cheeks to turn red. Law makes a 'thank you' gesture with his mouth for mending his hat.

The bookstore you two went to was crowded with people. The majority of the visitors were middle-aged gentlemen dressed in a brownish-colored suit vest reminiscent of an old page book. Law, which had been by your side since both of you arrived, had vanished. You simply sighed and walked into the children's encyclopedia section, minding your own business. Your dream book is peeking between the other books beside them. Still euphoric, you grabbed it without wasting any seconds, then ran to the cashier. At the same time, you heard a quiet noise in there. Duh, it's Law.

" Uncle, please have the mind to give me more than half price for this book. It was said that the book was of secondhand quality! " said Law.

Law was a super tiny and loudest boy among the tall gentlemen around him. He was, as usual, a tough cookie for his will. You only saw Law in your distant memory, doing nothing. Your common sense before was right about him that you have to admire his determination to be a medicine's learner. The most recent book he bargained for was the animal anatomy encyclopedia's latest edition. He indeed won't miss it. You just chuckled and walked into the confused cashier, poking Law's left shoulder. 

" Uncle, please wrap my book and his belongings. I will pay ours. " You smiled at the man at the cashier. You nailed the pointless bargains that Law has created. Law's mouth hanging open, he probably doesn't expect you to be willing to pay for it as well. 

" Thanks, (Name). Glad I finally got this book until I forgot to put my full savings in my pocket. Don't worry about your money, do you? " He said it, making the happiest face he'd ever made.

" Don't worry, Law. You can return my money whenever you want. Or maybe you return it with an item costing as much as the price of your book? " 

" Oh, is that so? If you wouldn't mind, then! "

It was summer almost at noon. Your straw hat is being blown by the cool breeze. Your hat twirls back down, but then Law runs to pick it up. This time, like a repeated pattern, it's Law who puts the hat on until it looks fine in your head. You were both giggling at each other. Two kids with larger hats in their hats were basically always in charge of each other. 

" (Name), let's go to my house then! Lammy and my mother have a bucket of strawberry sorbet! ".

___________________

" So which one, young boy? daisy or marigold? " The flower shopkeeper repeated the options for Law to decide. Law, on the other side, seems in a deep thought. A colour that represents you will always be a yellow one. The marigold also had a burst of yellow color, but had the deepest shade compared with the daisy's yellow, and because of that, Law picked the daisy as the best. All of his memories recall your explanation of the aims of the daisy flower for medical treatment. At least, Law thinks, a part of his soul has been put into the daisy bucket he brought for you. Law brought the bucket with the reason that he was returning a book's money.

It's been two weeks since the post - bookstore holiday outing. Due to the fact that the first day of back to school will be the first day of the next month, Law needs to spend his last school break finishing a little promise to you. He is already on the way to your house, only two houses away from his. He'd imagine how happy your face would be when you saw the money turn into a bucket of daisies. Law knocked on the door and called your name three times, but there was no response inside. He began to suspect that since last week he hadn't met you even once. Actually, this daisy bucket agenda is also a part of Law's surprise. He went back to his house and asked his parents for information after a strange feeling hit him in the gut.

" I've already told you, Law, about a week ago, you only made yourself hectic with the new anatomy book. (Name) was moved from Flevance. " Law's father explains with a serious tone. Chuckling in disbelief at why his son was so careless.

There was a gulp in his throat that made Law feel sudden nausea. His surprise plan was in vain. He hadn't expected it, but sometimes there is always an error output from the many trials of plans. Too stunned, he then sat on a cold hospital floor, folded his small feet, but the warm tears hugged him in a coccon.

It was his father's hand that reached Law's crown of head, " It's fine to cry, Law. (Name) left you a handful of the drawing book. Open it whenever you want. From my vantage point, your pure bond with (them) grows stronger with the passage of time. It will be unbreakable. That's why it's something you must keep throughout your lifetime. "

At that time, the last summer of the year was in Flevance. The heat wave started to decrease the temperature in the cold air. This winter is going to turn this town into a white landmark again. The white town of the North Blue, their actual name. However, it's just a natural phrase. The warmth will surely greets here in the years ahead, and there will be a time when Law meets the daisy field again. Like the innocence of love, in a daisy field, it had bloomed against the harshness of the cold. Its roots swallow the deep ground below, beyond any measure. 

.

Meanwhile, somewhere in the New World, there is a spring island climate with a town less crowded than Flevance. The central town landmark has similarities with Flevance's. The bricks were the preferred building material, but unlike the Flevance's white-pale bricks, the brown-colored ones were more common. A similar type of moment, but with a different substance. It does, indeed.

" Come on, darling, our new house has been waiting for us! speeds up your walk! ". Your mother shouts from a mile away.

Actually, you slow down the step because the cough you just experienced has gone worse. If there's a chance to rip out your throat, you do it happily, only to give a few scratches.

The Flavence memory recalls, it was a moment when you had a bad cough and Law, without hesitation, took you to Mr. Trafalgar for further medical treatment. Right now, if only you could paint a memory of being alive. You just smiled, disgusted by the coughs you've had since leaving the Flevance. The coughs were alive somewhere in your body, they were alive, and faded, as well as your memory of the white town. 

" Come in, Mother! ".

___________________

Note :

Another pandemic-stay at home writing (two years ago). It's my very first time doing this kinda stuff, alongside with Sabo's before. So please bear with me.

.

A little inspired by making a painting come to life is from this one, If I Could Draw Life - Yoasobi

[leverage-ot3]

*asks you about The Mentalist because I've meant to watch for years but never got around to it*

I got a bunch of asks about my shows thank y’all so much for letting me vent

the mentalist follows a team of murder investigators in the cbi, the california bureau of investigation

let’s go through the characters:

patrick jane

the mentalist. grew up as a carnie in the circus as a (fake) boy psychic wonder. basically, he’s just really smart and good at analyzing things so he got away seamlessly pretending to be a psychic. at one point he became pretty famous and was getting rich from it.

everything came to a head when he went on tv arrogantly talking about this serial killer, red john. he did the whole psychic bit analyzing the killer, then went home to see that his wife and daughter had been murdered by red john because of it.

there’s a backstory episode about it, but basically he ends up joining the cbi as a civilian consultant helping them solve murders (with the motive to eventually hunt down and kill red john). the show takes place a couple years after he joined the team.

he’s very good with people and charismatic, and a total chaos gremlin. he always goes off and causes some trouble on investigations but because of it his team closes every single case they have. he’s been described by multiple people as the smartest man they’ve ever known.

he’s VERY adamant that there is no such thing as psychics. after all, pretending to be one got his family killed.

he also makes himself tea at almost every crime scene because he’s just Like That™

I’m barely into men but I am head over heels for patrick jane and that’s a fact

teresa lisbon

grew up in chicago as the eldest child with three younger brothers. had to take over being the parent after her mother died and father gave up being there for them (I think he was an alcoholic???). she was very strict with them, which causes friction in a couple episodes when her siblings are involved

she’s the head agent in their cbi team, and for all intensive purposes, jane’s partner. she is logical and wants to follow the rules (and supposed to “keep jane under control”) but accepts his hijinks as necessary in order to solve the murders. she just wishes he’d tell her what the fuck he’s doing so she can do damage control at the very least.

she’s totally the team mom. she loves and cares for her three children teammates.

I’m in love with her, your honor

grace van pelt

team newbie. great with tech. starts out as optimistic and bright-eyed but adapts to the harsh world they live in. very compassionate and kind.

wayne rigsby

a simp for van pelt. legit puppy eyes for her. fell in love with her day one.

NEEDS to know how jane does his tricks. like, he will go insane trying to figure out how he does his coin tricks

kimball cho

was in a gang when he was a kid before joining the military. kinda stoic but also SUPER witty/sarcastic. bitch queen. “that’s impressive. the best I can get with one call is a pizza”

lets jane do whatever the fuck he wants because he gets things done but also secretly thrives on his chaos

other important/notable things:

the found family vibe you crave? it’s There™

your ships are definitely endgame

I can’t think of any storyline that was handled badly

every episode is decent if not really good

the red john aspect actually keeps you on the edge of your seat. every time you think it might be X, all of a sudden Y looks like the better candidate and so on, etc

the openings/beginnings are usually funny

example a: jane messing with a sheriff playing rock paper scissors

example b: “I don’t have to run faster than a tiger. I just have to run faster than you” *sprints*

example c: “I’ll bet you... 35 cents”

tws:

there is blood and gore, but it’s a show about investigating murders so I feel like that’s warranted

there IS one kinda slightly major character death towards the end of the final season. (note: NOT any of these main five!!!) I don’t think it was fair even though the person playing the role said they were brought on knowing they were going to die but it still majorly sucked. I cried. HOWEVER, that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t watch it. yeah, it sucked and I wish they didn’t do that but I love the show too much to hate it for that

[flickeringart]

Neptune in aspect with Mars

(Read my post about Sun and Moon aspecting Neptune and Mercury and Venus aspecting Neptune)

These planets aspecting each other makes for a curious connection, because in a sense, they represent opposing principles; Mars represents the personal drive and the ability to spring to action, the force that works to impose one’s independent will on the world – Neptune represents the inner urge for emotional unity and the religious/spiritual experience of being merged with the source of life. When these planets are in aspect in the natal chart, the personal ability to carry out one’s will is inextricably linked to redemptive longings. Simply put, Mars-Neptune individuals will put their energy into fulfilling the ego ideal, the perfection of potential that existed before the personality began to form. The personality cannot assert itself in a way that would crush the dream of perfection. Neptune is the dream of purity, the undifferentiated beauty of never having left the garden of Eden. Mars on the other hand is the agent of independence and self-motivated action – he has the purpose of fighting for the individual self which is antithetical to the Neptunian principle of surrender. While the Moon and Venus are quite social; the Moon represents nurturing and care-taking of needs, Venus represents the ability to be loving, affectionate and gracious; Mars is selfish and to a certain extent anti-social – most definitely anti-Eden and its eternal bliss. Subsequently, Neptune paired with Venus or the Moon is a little less of an obvious conflict than Neptune paired with Mars.

The conjunction of Neptune-Mars might cause considerable frustration and unconscious manipulation, because one cannot assert oneself, which is to declare separation, without feeling a deep sense of guilt and shame. It’s a little bit like the Bible story of Adam and Eve eating of the forbidden fruit and immediately becomes aware of sin. This is certainly not an easy phenomenon to deal with. The impulse to avoid accountability for one’s actions can be overwhelming, even if the consequences are perceived to be good. There can be a tremendously inflated sense of righteousness accompanying every move the individual takes because deep down there’s the feeling that one has committed a terrible trespass, that one will be unable to atone for. While the softer aspects, the trine and the sextile, more easily lend themselves to genuine selfless acts and natural inclination to fight on behalf of every bleeding heart and soul in the world through acts of sympathy and kindness, the conjunction usually brings more troubles. There can be an overwhelming feeling of having to do certain things because one cannot stand the idea of being separate from other people. One finds it easy to identify as the martyr or victim, unwilling to take radical responsibility for one’s actions – or if one does it’s in order to self-sacrifice. Often the individual will adopt any ideology that promotes the mass before the individual – often socialism or marxism fits the bill. Neptune is symbolic of undifferentiated reality, blurred edges and passive surrender. It’s not a planet that promotes autonomy and individuation. Not uncommonly, decisions and actions are referred to as byproducts of societal or larger-scale units that have little to do with the poor self. These individuals are usually profoundly dissatisfied with the ways of society because on some level they believe that individual autonomy and agency is a sin – and that the only way to redeem oneself and humanity is through some kind of chaotic dissolution of difference. This urge is seldom conscious, but it is there none the less. Vladimir Lenin had this conjunction and he wanted to revolutionize society to fit the marxist ideology, but really what this means is to overthrow the upper class – to punish those that seem to revel in the delights of Eden, to get rid of the internal shame of being excluded from paradise.

It seems like Neptune-Mars shows up in individuals with the capacity to move a crowd, perhaps most importantly, with the capacity to be the front figure and leader of the masses. Vladimir Lenin certainly affected the masses and so did Napoleon I with the same conjunction. Hassan II of Morocco, known to be one of the most severe rulers widely accused of authoritarian practices and abuses of civil rights had this conjunction as well. These examples are far removed from Neptune’s reputation for denoting empathy, soft-heartedness and sensitivity. However, it might be precisely because of the refusal to abandon the hope of the sweet sweet nectar of paradise that can only truly be accessed in a state of pre-birth if even then, that the outrage is so total. Most children scream when they are born, and this is probably the kind of terrible rage caused by separation that lingers in these people. The sign the conjunction falls in will certainly affect the expression the energies filter through – Lenin had the conjunction in Aries, Hassan had it in Leo and Napoleon had it in Virgo. Virgo is a much more analytical and practical sign than the prideful fire signs of Aries and Leo – consequently Napoleon is famous for his fine skill for method and strategy in war. On his Wikipedia page, it states that Napoleon had a hypnotic effect on people and could bend the strongest leaders to his will in one-on-one conversations. Hypnosis is a marked Neptunian phenomenon. What happens is that the person is able to gently infiltrate the other person’s will – which is quite extraordinary. If someone is receptive and open enough to suggestion, the opportunity and the invitation is there to mold the other through unconscious communion. Since there’s no obvious forcing taking place under hypnosis, the hypnotized person must cooperate on some level – yet it’s not a conscious cooperation which is why the whole phenomena of hypnosis is so unnerving. In general, people would like to think that they are in complete control of themselves, but it’s more of a fancy fantasy rather than an actual reality. We don’t know what we are receptive to and Neptune reminds us of this. He seeps through the most tightly shut doors.

(Buy products with my art)

My own family is quite Neptune dominated and what often happens is that I feel subtly manipulated, yet the manipulation is never fully conscious on the part of the individuals so it becomes difficult to confront them. The times I have, they either take offense or seem genuinely perplexed. It is impossible to confront Neptune, because he works underneath the surface, below the threshold of consciousness. When confronted these types are deeply disturbed that they could’ve imposed something on someone – they either go into a introspective mood, become appalled or proclaim their love and sympathy in an attempt to restore union. My mother has Mars in the 12th house and although it’s not aspecting Neptune, Mars is placed in the house pertaining to this planet and she has Neptune in her 1st house. She never gets angry but people around her certainly do. She is eternally understanding of everyone else’s anger and has acceptance for it, yet she doesn’t respond to any of it on a personal level. She apologizes every time something upsets her. She is never aggressive, yet she does instill subtle guilt through little cues and hints every now and then because it is a sin to have a will that does not align with the crowd that one finds oneself in. Sometimes, when things aren’t the way she wants to see them she doesn’t see them. She presumes that on the most basic level, all people want the same thing, which is probably true on a “soul level”, but sometimes it doesn’t translate to everyday matters. People’s personalities contradict each other and this is no trivial matter – people can and do clash because of individual differences and it can be detrimental to one or all of the individuals involved. However, Neptune doesn’t like to see a clash as a clash – that would be to treat it as a definite fact, which would contradict the fluidity of oceanic union. The frustratingly passive statement “It’s everyone’s fault” or “It’s everyone’s responsibility” is the attempt to not deal with cause and effect while establishing the fact that some abstract common force is always at work. This is neither true nor false but this attitude conveniently keeps everyone “unified” and dependent upon each other.

Admittedly I went with the most gruesome examples when writing about the conjunction, but it goes without saying that not all people with this aspect is going to be a Lenin type – Ryan Gosling, Avril Lavinge and Timothé Chalamet all have this conjunction and they’re all quite popular entertainers in their own ways – they move the masses on some level. Ryan Gosling has a Pisces Rising so his chart ruler is Neptune which makes it particularly strong. He gives off that pure hearted watery eyed look that is extremely mesmerizing to the public – he portrays himself as sweet and compassionate, he seems to have a marked innocence and purity to his outward projected identity. Avril Lavinge has her Sun-Mercury in the 12th house squaring her Neptune-Mars conjunction in the 3rd. She has more of an edge to her personality with a lot of planets in Scorpio but she certainly comes off as a chaotic, intense and absent-minded creative which I would attribute more to Neptune. Her strong rebellious “I don’t care” statements through her music resonates with a lot of people, but so does her more sentimental songs. Timothe´ Chalamet has his Moon in Pisces sextile Mars-Mercury-Neptune and he is quite the stereotypical Neptunian boy – he looks delicate, introspective, dreamy and androgynous, more like an ethereal creature than an earth-bound human. With the conjunction in the 5th house there’s no wonder that he can act and express himself in a very fluid way. Acting and performing musically are the specialities of the Neptune, and if enough components in the chart support the endeavor one might just become famous. The trine and sextile aspect also lend themselves well to these kind of occupations. These people can effectively gain the sympathy of the public because people recognize something of themselves – something pure and unborn, a mutual feeling.

A good example of someone with the trine aspect between Neptune and Mars is Russel Brand. He is quite the Neptunian with an angular 10th house Neptune opposing his Sun and trining his Jupiter-Mars-Moon planets in Aries. Even though he certainly has the fire and energy of an Aries Mars that can sometimes be a bit too much for people he is not only fighting for himself he is fighting for all people. In many ways he’s embodying  universal hope and rage. He is fiery but also very receptive and deeply concerned with not causing any damage or hurt despite his characteristic blunt and direct approach. He has a marked religious/spiritual inclination, which is usually the case with a strong Neptune in the chart. In his early years the longing for Eden was sought through drugs, alcohol and fame, while it has now shifted to a more healthy inner exploration and focus on being of service to people. The soft aspects between Neptune and Mars-Moon-Jupiter planets in his chart helps him to cope with the disturbing Sun-Neptune opposition. In recent interviews, he admits that he still feels the pull of fame and success, yet he knows that if he goes down that path he will lose himself (his Sun) and will ultimately end up disillusioned and dissatisfied. I have the trine in my own chart, and I float aimlessly through life with the notion that things will work out and my actions will come to me, because I can’t plan or control anything. I have learnt that I have to trust the way things unfold, because I have a clear sense that my forced actions won’t lead me anywhere except to frustration and a sense of isolation. The sextile aspect seems to function a little bit more as an asset and a skill for the person to use. Politicians like Hillary Clinton, Angela Merkel and Francois Hollande all have this aspect and they can effectively use their receptivity to the masses and people in general to inform their actions.

Now to the harder aspects. Britney Spears is a good example of the dilemmas created by the Neptune-Mars square. Her Neptune squares Mars in the 12th house, the house belonging to Neptune and Pisces. Because of mental instability in her twenties she was put under a conservatorship which is essentially the equivalent of giving up personal control of one’s personal matters in order for an outside source to manage them until one gains some foothold. Mars is one of the prime factors of personal ambition and autonomy, but when it’s in the 12th it is given up – it is essentially a slave to the undifferentiated realm and subjected all the forces of the unconscious. A 12th house Mars in itself doesn’t have to produce the mess that Britney found herself in, but with it squaring Neptune, Mars is going to get swamped, mislead, confused, manipulated and subtly coerced because of the need for fusion, into doing things that will pull her further away from independent action. Another good example is Kylie Jenner. She has Neptune in her 1st house squaring Mars on the MC. She is publicly known for being part of the Kardashian-Jenner family, but she’s also gained attention because she skillfully created her own brand Kylie Cosmetics and became very “successful” (as in earning a lot of money) due to her own independent action and initiative. However, Neptune is anti-independence – and curiously enough there’s always some dishonesty involved when Neptune makes any hard aspects in the chart. She was declared the youngest self-made billionaire by Forbes in 2019, but, she has later been accused of forging tax documents to appear to be a billionaire. Neptune simply can’t let her be all that her Mars wants to be – a successful business woman with a clean record. Self-sabotage is almost always the case, however minor with this aspect, because Neptune refuses Mars’ need to be potent in the world.

The opposition creates a different dynamic although the dilemma is similar to the square. The person can be called to completely abandon an independent will to take action in favor of the glamour and blissful archetypal experience, not unlike the example of Russel Brand and his indulgence in fame and crowd-pleasing at the expense of his sense of self. The difference between having Sun opposing Neptune and Mars opposing Neptune is that in the first instance one is prone to give up a sense of self in favor of Neptune’s waters, while in the second, one feels the urge to give up the ability to direct one’s own life in order to merge with life around oneself. The opposition usually lends itself to extremism because the two polarities, in this case Mars and Neptune, can’t coexist. Queen Elizabeth II has this aspect, Mars-Jupiter in the 1st opposing Neptune in the 7th. She is on the one hand seen as an archetypal figure, immortal and divine and blissfully kept out of the real world in order to serve as a symbol and a fairytale for people to feel spiritually connected to. She’s non-aggressive, forgiving and compassionate, transcendent of the fuss of the world yet overseeing it all with care. She is essentially functioning to satisfy the religious/spiritual instinct of the masses, although it’s certainly done at the expense of her own selfish wants and needs. Luckily for her, her Mars drive is quite global and collective in nature considering that it falls in Aquarius and is conjunct Jupiter – it keeps her objective and less personal in her martial assertion. However, I’m sure she struggles with the contradiction between her own will and her role as an immortal unreality that would seem to activate itself in the interaction with other people (Neptune in the 7th). Edward Snowden also has this opposition falling in the same houses. His Mars-Sun conjunction opposes Neptune, and he famously leaked information about mass surveillance programs to the press. Neptune has everything to do with leaks and the dissolution of boundaries. He’s both been called a hero a traitor – which perfectly fits with the contradiction that the opposition represents. He certainly made a personal sacrifice by revealing the things he did so he is perfectly shouldering the martyr cape. In any case he did what he did for the public with the concern of other people in mind (Neptune 7th house) he took a non-selfish stance for the sake of a higher ideal and ethical conviction. Both Queen Elizabeth and Edward Snowden are quite extreme in their Neptunian capacity and has taken on fates of mythic magnitude.

[sunandmoongobrrr]

Korra and her Brutalization: A Legend of Korra Meta

In honor of International Womens’ Day, I want to talk a little bit about Legend of Korra and the treatment of Korra (and to a small extent other women) throughout the show. Content warning: there's some disturbing scenes that I show here, but if you've watched all of LoK, you should be fine.

Korra starts off confident; she is a young avatar who is eager to learn and feels suffocated from the isolation she is kept in from a very young age. But that doesn’t stop her, and like the headstrong girl she is, she moves to Republic City to make a difference and step into her role as the avatar.

Korra immediately starts to doubt herself; she becomes unsure of her abilities and frustrated with herself, and through that she learns to become emotionally vulnerable with Tenzin. To me, this was really great. It showed that you can be confident and vulnerable, and that the two aren’t necessarily independent of each other.

(I’m going to be honest, the 2nd season I didn’t really remember much of, so I’m just going to skip over that. Because what I really want to talk about is season 3.)

In season three, Korra faces the Red Lotus, an “anarchist” group that essentially wants to kill her. And they get pretty close. First, I want to talk about how Tenzin is beaten by the Red Lotus. This has been brought up in Lily Orchard’s (in?)famous LOK video, and while I disagree with her on many many topics of the show, I really think she has a point here. When Tenzin is being brutalized by the Red Lotus, the camera pans away. It is SO painful to see him like this, and the directors know it. It’s TOO painful to see it, so they don’t show you it, and the episode ends before we can see him be defeated.

Contrast that with Korra. They show you every detail of this. And I mean every detail.

It’s disgusting, and they refuse to treat her with any sort of decency or respect like they do Tenzin. It’s almost like they want us to enjoy her torturing. It’s genuinely gross.

People will often refute this by saying “LoK is just a darker show! Look at what they did to the Earth Queen!” And while yes, it is marketed towards an older audience, there’s still no point in brutalizing Korra this way. The main difference between Korra and the Earth Queen is that… well, Korra’s the protagonist. We’re supposed to be rooting for her, and while the Earth Queen being suffocated was definitely dark, it wasn’t unprecedented. The audience was never supposed to like the Earth Queen—she exploited and kidnapped her own people, so of course we wouldn’t care THAT much if she died. But we’ve been with Korra since the beginning. We’re supposed to want her to be happy, and why on earth would we want her to be tortured brutally in such a disgusting way that gives her absolutely no dignity? If we want her to succeed?

(here Zaheer uses the same technique used on the Earth Queen to suffocate here on Korra. for some reason)

In Season 4, the main focus is on Korra and her healing from the brutal things the Red Lotus did to her. She is clearly still struggling, and it could have been another great way to show how being physically strong and confident doesn’t mean you can’t be vulnerable. But they make a lot of bad choices in this season.

One of my main gripes is that in order to heal, she has to return to her abuser, Zaheer, and HE has to teach her how to feel better.

I don’t want to compare LoK to ATLA, although it’s very important to mention that a show that’s a direct sequel, uses its old characters, and banks off of references, should be able to be compared to its predecessor. But I think it’s important to compare Korra’s arc here to Zuko. This doesn’t come out of nowhere; Korra has a lot of similarities to Zuko. The chopping of her hair is a significant turning point in her arc, and there’s an episode called “Korra Alone” (which is clearly a direct callback; shown below).

The difference between Zuko and Katara is that, a. Zuko never had to accept his abuser, and b. Zuko started off as a villain.

One of Zuko’s major points is when he confronts his father—his abuser. He does not bow to him and give in, saying that maybe he had a few good points or his heart was in the right place, but he directly says that Ozai was wrong for what he did. This isn’t the case with Korra. For some reason, Korra has to learn to trust her abuser. The person who did this to her:

And she has to hear him out.

This leads me to my second point, and what’s basically the complaint I have; despite being a protagonist, the show treats Korra like a villain. It frames her torture scenes as if we’re supposed to be excited that she’s being brutalized, as if we’re supposed to think she deserves it. And it’s not even handled properly as one of the villains we know so well—Zuko, who was able to overcome his abuse and become a protagonist who we root for. Again, Zuko and Korra aren’t directly the same characters, but there are parallels between the two and the show encourages their comparison. When it comes to Korra, however, we’re supposed to believe that she deserves everything that comes to her; the brutal scenes and the lack of dignity, even if she is a protagonist.

And in the end, that’s what we’re meant to believe; that Korra deserved what happened to her. In the finale, Korra says, “I finally understand why I had to go through all that. I needed to understand what true suffering was, so I could become more compassionate to others.”

This is, to put it short, ridiculous. I hate this so much I can’t even begin to say how much I hate it. No, Korra did not have to go through the torture she went through. She did not have to go through the mercury poisoning. She did not have to go through every hardship she did. This “what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger” is so harmful because Korra’s healing revolved around accepting her abuser and thanking him for the awful things he did to her. Korra wasn’t even that cocky by the end of the first season, so what it’s essentially indirectly teaching girls is that if you’re confident, you’ll pay. It’s disgusting.

Zuko got a banishment to the Earth Kingdom, got to have his ideas and practices challenged, but he never got physically tortured. I truly, truly believe that one of the main reasons why Korra is quite literally villainized by the show is because she was a confident, brown teenage girl. None of the male characters are treated with such disrespect and we never get told that they need to be “humbled” by abuse.

This is not completely resolved to LoK; there are some aspects in ATLA that I think could’ve been fixed had there been more women in the room. I tag her a lot (bc her metas are awesome), but I really recommend you read @araeph 's Katara: Consumed by Destiny series. I also have a meta here about how Katara is treated in ATLA, specifically in “The Fortuneteller.” (I want to emphasize that while I am anti-Kataang, I don’t believe that Katara’s treatment had to do with the ship itself or that kataang is inherently anti-Katara. It’s just a note about how her character is treated in this episode and beyond.)

I’ve heard a lot of people say that they’re ‘glad’ that LoK didn’t feature Suki or Mai or Ty Lee, because they can’t imagine how poorly they’d be represented. And honestly, I can’t blame them.

This isn’t to say that we need to stop watching LOK or even ATLA. I think the internet has this weird problem where we’ve been told that the way to get rid of problematic media is to just stop consuming anything even remotely problematic altogether. But certain aspects of media will always be relatively problematic, since as content creators we sometimes input our biases into the things we create. The solution, then, is not to banish anyone who puts any harmful stereotypes into their content from society, but to actively and healthily criticize it. Bryke are not God, but they’re also not demons put on the earth to suppress woc. They’re white guys that have implicit biases that have worked their way into the content they produce. I think the lesson learned here, is to have women, especially BIWOC, in writing rooms, to prevent atrocious acts from happening to future Korra's.

Happy International Women’s Day, y’all.

[nellygwyn]

different anon, thoughts of harlots portrayal of historical sex work?

I got another anon asking for a similar thing so here it goes:

Season 1, in particular, I think, had a really nuanced approach to sex work, historical and contemporary. It says a lot that some of my friends who are full service sex workers felt it explored a lot of the complex thoughts they have about being sex workers. We had Charlotte and Emily who are both ambivalent and ambitious, practical, knowing that money is the most important thing in their world whilst also being unattainable for them in other socially acceptable careers (also, since I did my MA thesis on the rape of working class adolescent girls in Georgian London, where I basically found that working in a pub or as a servant in a house could just as unsavory, if not worse, as being a sex worker in the same time period, I like to think Charlotte in particular knows this very well and that's why she wants to control her own narrative so much). We also have Lucy, who hates it and is taken advantage of by her mother in many ways, and other characters who end up in the sex industry through ~Hogarthian~ methods i.e. tricked by a kindly older woman who turns out to be an unscrupulous brothel-keeper a la Mother Needham. This kind of thing certainly happened, though not as often as 18th century moralists might like you to think, but in the show, it plays into the overarching theme that this is a world where the people who should be looking after sex workers and making sure they aren't treated like shit literally do not care (which definitely mirrors our own times). Like, Emily likes sex work in many ways but when she experiences awful aspects of it? It's always because of powerful people letting other powerful people do whatever they want to these women....the only thing outside forces ever seem to do is moralise or take away their money, or punish them. People who have the power to actually transform the system are basically useless, except Josiah in S2 who initially starts off as useless but does later try to make amends.....he's just not powerful ENOUGH though.

I do wish they hadn't made so much of the '1 in 5 women in Georgian London sell sex' because....that's not necessarily a false statistic but it doesn't actually just include sex workers, it also includes women who lived with men they weren't married to which could've been a financial arrangement or could've been simply women living with long term partners. It also includes women who dabbled in sex work, which was extremely common in a world where other, more socially acceptable jobs for working women didn't always pay very well. We know that a lot of women who were in domestic service in Georgian London also had what we might call 'a side hustle' as sex workers, specifically strollers and bunters (sex workers who didn't work in a brothel and usually picked up clients/did work on the streets). I think Harlots did a good job of showing us like, sex workers who work in brothels but also more independent sex workers like Nancy and Violet, but it would've been nice to have a character who was a maid in a middle class home most of the time but occasionally dabbled in sex work in the late evening. It would've emphasised the theme of money being important and barely within reach, but also would've shown the reality of women's work in this period OUTSIDE OF sex work.

The diversity of the industry was also good, although it's a shame that the show kind of failed at showing us male sex workers, or queer sex workers - I mean, we did see mollies (contemporary name for gay men sex workers) but not in a particularly meaningful way imo. Plus, we could've had a trans woman sex worker, especially as there is precedent in this period! Princess Serefina, for example, was probably a transgender woman and one of the most famous sex workers of the early 18th century. But I think Harlots did show us the amount of women of colour who not only lived in Georgian London, but who worked there and not just as sex workers. We also had sex workers with disabilities, too. One of my favourite details is that Harriet Lennox is inspired by a real Georgian sex worker called Black Harriet who only employed sex workers of colour at her brothel (which Harriet Lennox also does in S2 and 3). And there is quite an admirable attempt to explore intersectionality in the series - Harriet doesn't just experience sexism but pretty awful racism (I mean, she literally used to be enslaved by the first man who made her his mistress)....and this changes the way she experiences the world.

My biggest criticism is of the way Charlotte was killed off. Well, first of all, I have an issue with the fact Season 3 put her in a relationship with a pimp, which is so fucked up on every level. Like, not even just a pimp but a pimp who tried to kill her and the women she lives with. Then, she ends up being ACTUALLY killed off by said pimp and his brother (also a pimp) in the most deranged way possible a.k.a getting in the way of a fight and being pushed down the stairs. So many stories about sex workers, historical and contemporary, employ the 'Dead Hooker' trope and I hate it and I especially hate it for this time period because dying violently or tragically as a sex worker doesn't have much basis in reality. Charlotte specifically was inspired by famous courtesans of the time like Kitty Fisher and Fanny Murray. Both of whom......met someone who was willing to keep them long term/marry them and left the industry, financially stable and contented. This series wanted to honour women like that but I don't understand how it could do that by killing Charlotte violently (and other characters violently). We know that most sex workers left the industry around their mid twenties, usually because they had found a long term keeper/husband or because they became actresses/singers in the London theatres (a job that had strong links to sex work and courtesanry at the time). There were so many options for Charlotte but the writers picked that one, as her exit. It just brings us back to the fact that for some people, sex workers don't deserve any kind of happy ending. In fact, John Cleland, the writer of the scandalous c. 1749 erotic novel 'Fanny Hill,' had his book banned and criticised not just because it was obscene but because Fanny never repents her life as a sex worker. Instead, she marries a decent man and has a decent life and explictly says she doesn't feel bad or upset about her old job. Like, that's an example from the actual time period so imagine my disappointment when history seemed to repeat itself in a period series c. 2019.

[coupsnim]

what would your moots be like as idols?

this ask has been sitting in my inbox for ages because 1. I didn't have enough time and 2. I'm not the best at this kind of things 🙈 but I wanted to give it a try

I don't know all my mutuals personally, as I don't talk to most of them (sorry about that...), so I included the ones I think I know better or I see more often on my dash! ☺️

🌼 @scoupsy - the producer, is involved in all artistic aspects of every project, from music production and song writing to album design. is usually the one who comes up with the concept for every comeback and is obviously the richest one, so will buy a lot of meals for the other members (because she may seem a little intimidating, but is a big softie). 🌼 @soonhoonsol - the trustworthy leader, promotes her group better than the agency, defends her members when they get mistreated and is usually the spokesperson at awards shows. as the leader, she goes through a lot, but tries not to show it to the public. is the pillar of the group and all the fans have a soft spot for her (and would do anything to protect her).

🌼 @xuseokgyu - the glue, is the reason why the group is still together, official emotional support and mom of the group. supports every member in all their solo endeavours: sends coffee trucks on the sets of their movies/dramas, is the first guest on their variety shows/radio programs, posts their updates on social medias and promotes them better than the agency.

🌼 @hwiyoungies - the friendly one, speaks to her fans as if they were her bestfriends and likes to chat with them through the group fancafe or by going live. is the one that keeps fans updated on the other members and like sharing little anectodes about funny behind the scenes. probably the one who gives the most spoilers, just for fun. people like her honesty and her not being the most "conventional idol", but she knows when to draw the line when fans get too comfortable.

🌼 @gyukwans - the passionate maknae, variety shows, radio shows, sub-units, solo projects, acting gigs, she does it all! she works so much that her fans sometimes worry if she gets enough sleep or if she takes days off to recharge, but she's young and full of energy and would do anything to promote her group.

🌼 @dongkwan - the radio host, listens to a lot of different artists and likes to share new groups or her favourite tracks with her fans. she probably started with a short podcast and now landed her own radio show where she invites other underrated idols and talks about music.

🌼 @woozi - the social butterfly, knows everyone and has a lot of friends in different groups (but no one knows how and when she met them), even if they're not part of the same agency. cheerful and funny, is known by all kpop fans even if they don't support her group.

🌼 @iiasha - the variety genius, appeared in one episode of a famous variety show, said something funny and now every pd wants to work with her. her sense of humour and wittiness are known not only to kpop fans but to the general public as well. hates appearing on variety shows but still accepts every offer because she's a workaholic.

🌼 @haniehae - the choreographer, the group main dancer that spends hours and hours in the practice room. a little introverted, doesn't speak often on variety shows, but once is on stage or is asked to show her talent, she becomes the brightest star and everybody is left speechless.

🌼 @dkmakemyday - the kind one, never did anything wrong, never said anything bad, has a pure heart and has always nice words for everyone. likes to share little encouraging words on the group fancafe for her fans.

🌼 @jihooned - the idol turned actor, may have started as an idol, but now works mainly as an actress. from cheesy web dramas to legal dramas, from coming-of-age movies to sageuk, she excels in every genre. her distinct acting style is always praised by fellow actors and juniors look up to her and can't wait for her next project.

🌼 @ohoshi - the wild card, no one knows what is going on in her head or knows what her next move will be, but that's what makes her so endearing. has the best reactions, that's why is often asked to guest on variety shows. loved by every single fan, is probably everyone's bias wrecker.

🌼 @julyprince - the blueprint, has such a distinct style that everything she produces is easily recongnisble. fellow artists admire her and juniors take her as an rolemodel, but as it often happens to talented people, other groups' fans don't aknowledge her. that's why her own fans like to make long threads on twitter on how she paved the way.