#no penis bone for me i guess

[shuafiles]

roses [j.jh]

MDNI, 18+

SUMMARY | think i should text my ex (fwb)? what happens when jaehyun sees his ex-fwb with another guy?

PAIRING | ex fwb!jaehyun x afab!reader (with reader x jungwoo)

CONTENT | ex fwb to ?, college!au, unprotected sex (on pills), oral (f receiving), fingering, dirty talk, creampie. (probably more that i missed but its just smut)

WORDS | 4.3k

A/N | im so bad at giving summaries but it’s basically roses by jaehyun :D not proofread

you knew how to get under jaehyun’s skin. well, not on purpose, but he sure as hell was sending daggers in your direction as he saw you all cozied up with a tall blond-haired guy at his frat party. jaehyun scoffed as he took a sip out of the red cup in his hand. how dare you bring a boy into his house in the first place.

jaehyun’s gaze never left you as you laughed at something the french fry guy said. “bet it’s not even funny.” he muttered to himself, rolling his eyes as you placed your hand on the guy’s arm.

“dude, what is the matter with you?” mark pulled him out of his trance, hitting him lightly on the arm. his best friend followed his gaze and smirked when he figured out what he was so worked up about. “isn’t that y/n? didn’t you use to date her?”

“we did not date.” jaehyun moved his sight to glare at the younger boy instead. “i could care less about her.”

“couldn’t.” mark corrected him with a cheeky smile, “but you already knew that, so i’m guessing you do care a tiny bit.”

you and jaehyun met at university when you were freshmen. you accidentally walked into the wrong room at your first college party when a certain someone was changing out his clothes and flashed you with his penis on your first week. you screamed and ran as fast as you could. moments later, mystery penis guy found you amidst the crowd and apologized profoundly, which left you confused because you were so sure you should be the one apologizing. nonetheless, you both decided to put it behind you and start fresh.

“jaehyun.” mystery penis guy introduced himself to you while handing you a red cup that was most likely filled with booze.

“y/n.” you accepted his cup, inspecting it. “you’re not trying to drug me because i saw your dick, right?”

jaehyun laughed, and you smiled as he shook his head. that was the beginning of a new friendship.

until during your sophomore year, you were drunk crying over your ex, and you had jaehyun over because you needed a friend. he was awkwardly trying to pat your back while trying to keep a distance between the two of you. don’t get him wrong, he found you attractive as fuck, and he would fuck you the moment you let him. but he was somehow scared to ruin the year-long friendship between the two of you, so he never acted on what his dick and heart told him to.

this night was different, though; you were vulnerable and needed to feel better about yourself. “he said i couldn’t suck dick properly!” you whined, which made jaehyun freeze. “who breaks up with someone over that!”

jaehyun had to fight every bone in his body not to jump on you and kiss the living hell out of you. he felt apologetic that you were crying over a dumbass, but he couldn’t help but find you cute. your cheeks flushed, makeup messy with tears. you looked perfect. “i think that’s what they call an ick.” he tried lightening up the mood, but this just made you glare at him.

“i’ll bite your dick off.” you punched his arm, which did little to no damage.

“ouch, is that what you did while you were sucking his?” he rubbed his arm, but had the biggest smile on his face.

“you’re not helping!” you covered your face with your hands.

jaehyun didn’t know what possessed him then; he spoke without thinking about his words. “i could teach you a thing or two about giving…” he immediately regretted what he was offering. he coughed before ending his sentence, looking everywhere around the room but at you. he let his dick do the talking as if you were stupid enough to agree–

“teach me.”

needless to say, you knew how to suck dick (even a few pointers on how to kiss and fuck) that night.

jaehyun tried to pull his eyes away from you as you whispered something in the guy’s ear before disappearing into the crowd and heading upstairs. now he was frustrated. you ended your year-long arrangement just merely two weeks ago, and you have already found someone new? you just moved on and had enough. god, he sounded so pathetic; he got it bad.

- 

you lay in bed that night, chewing on your lip as you scrolled through your phone. you just left the party an hour ago after sleeping with another man. you felt weird. like what you did was wrong, but you couldn’t exactly point out why.

as if the universe decided to play tricks on you, your phone vibrated in your hand. the contact “PLS DONT ANSWER” on full display. you glanced at the time to see it was 2 am. you ran your fingers through your hair and sighed. closing your eyes, your finger swiped to answer the call.

“you answered?” his voice echoing through the phone, surprised you picked up the phone.

“don’t make me regret it.”

“i saw you today.”

“… okay?” you knew he saw you. in fact, you made sure he saw you with jungwoo, aka the guy you fucked an hour ago.

“with another guy.” mission success. you were being petty, but you were doing it for a reason (so you convinced yourself).

the very reason you broke off your arrangement with jaehyun was because you saw him with another girl’s tongue down his throat in a not-very-discrete section in the library two weeks ago. you could tell he enjoyed it by the way his hands were firmly gripping her ass. the sight made you sick to your stomach.

your agreement was strictly for physical reasons — you fucked, nothing more and nothing less. you were good friends who were having fantastic sex.

you don't know why the thought of him sleeping with other girls upset you. you both agreed to keep it physical. no strings attached, especially since you're both juniors and have to focus on finishing your degrees. yet why did it bother you he was out kissing girls?

“congrats, you can see.” you cringed at your attempt to seem like a cool girl.

“cut the bullshit, y/n.” jaehyun rolled his eyes even though you couldn’t see him. “you broke up with me, then you slept with somebody else just two weeks after?”

“i wasn’t aware we had a relationship that even allowed us to break up.” you opened your eyes. realizing how long you last talked to jaehyun, you hated to admit that you missed the sound of his voice.

“called it off, ghosted—whatever you call it! you know what i mean.”

“i did not ghost you.” practically mumbling against the phone.

“a text saying “let's stop this” is not an explanation, y/n. plus, that's besides that point!”

“i really don't want to talk about this right now, jaehyun.”

“fine. meet me tomorrow at the café you like at 2 pm.” and with that, he hung up on you.

- 

jaehyun sat in an easy-to-spot area at the café you loved. how did he know? because you used to have little study dates in this very coffee shop (if you could even call it a date). his heart was beating out of his chest. he didn’t know why his heart was beating so fast while he anticipated your presence. maybe he drank too much caffeine? he shook his head in an attempt to clear his mind. he wanted to believe that was the reason why he could not sit still.

the tiny bell at the front door rang, indicating a new customer. the sound made jaehyun whip his head up. there you were. a brown coat hugging your body, your hair in one of those clamps that held it up neatly. you were in the most basic clothes, yet you looked so beautiful. jaehyun smiled at the sight of you until he saw a dozen roses you had in your hands, the smile was replaced with a slight frown.

“hi, jae.” you breathed out, taking a seat on the empty spot in front of him. placing your belongings on the table, which included the bouquet that jaehyun was glaring at.

“aww, y/n, you didn’t have to.” jaehyun took the bouquet from the table to inspect it, trying to catch a glimpse of a card with the sender's name on it.

“shut up.” you mumbled, snatching it from him. cheeks heating up, you avoided his gaze.

“i’m assuming it's from lover boy last night?” jaehyun huffed, crossing his arms across his chest. he looked absolutely silly right now.

“it’s none of your business.” you fought back. leaning against your seat, “why’d you want to see me anyway?” 

“i didn’t.” he lied through his teeth, but you didn’t know that. “i just think i deserve some kind of explanation as to why our,” he paused to think how he would label your relationship, “friendship ended.”

“you’re so annoying.” glaring at him, you contemplated why you even showed up in the first place.

“you love me.” he grinned at you, flashing his damned dimples, to which you let out a snort. “was he better than me?”

“very much.” you smiled as he lost his grin. “bigger too.”

“we’re telling lies now?” jaehyun raised his eyebrow. “you said your shit ex had a big dick, too, so i don't really trust your judgment.” you chewed your lip in annoyance, wanting to slap his irritatingly beautiful face.

“asshole.”

- 

it had been a week since your last interaction with jaehyun.  your little café meet-up didn’t lead to anything as you still refused to tell him why you no longer wanted to see him. you would be lying if you said you had not thought of him at all. you missed him.

in the midst of doing your university work, your phone buzzed, a text message popping up on the screen.

PLS DONT ANSWER: are u awake

you stared at the message, with no intention of replying.

PLS DONT ANSWER: busy fucking french fry boy?

PLS DONT ANSWER: what position he got u in

you rolled your eyes at his last message. truth be told, jungwoo gave you the flowers as an apology. he apologized for sleeping with you that day, telling you how he was drunk and not over his ex, and he hoped that you would not take it the wrong way. you felt incredibly stupid and annoyed at how even in your attempt to forget jaehyun, you still failed.

the phone rang a few seconds later, but this time, you didn’t pick up. not knowing what to say to him. missing the call, he didn’t send anything after, making your heart sink.

you knew what you signed up for when you agreed to keep things physical between the two of you. although there were moments when it would seem like you two were a couple, you knew he would never like you like that. he was jeong fucking jaehyun for fucks sake. he could have any girl he looked at if he wanted to. you hear how women talk about him in the bathrooms, most of them very lewd. everyone wanted a taste of him. you couldn't blame them, even after having a taste of him, you still craved and came back for more.

a knock on your apartment door pulled you out of your trance. curious, you stood up to open it. there at your door was one very soaked jaehyun with a flower–that looked like it was picked out of a bush–in hand. his white shirt sticking to his chest, giving you a very slight peek of his toned body which gave you flashbacks to the nights you would spend together.

“jaehyun,” raising a brow, “why are you soaking wet?” you were sure there was not any weather forecast about rain tonight.

“it was raining and–” jaehyun let out, catching his breath, “wanted to see you.” pushing what looked like a rose in your direction. “here.”

eyeing the rose, you carefully scanned his face as you took it from his hand. you stepped aside to let him in your apartment. he stepped inside, careful of spreading rainwater all over your place. “stay here, i’ll get you something dry.” turning away from him, you walked towards your bedroom with your thoughts all over the place. why was he here? what was this rose about? and why did he look so fucking hot?

with a clean sweatshirt (that you were pretty sure was his) in hand, you walked back into the living room where you were greeted by jaehyun’s bare back faced to you as he looked at the pictures you had hung around. you bit your lip at the sight. feeling sparks shoot throughout your body.

you cleared your throat, which made jaehyun spin around to face you, shooting you a smile. you extended your arm to hand him the sweater, but he grabbed your arm instead and pulled your body against his. he was hugging you. you froze in place as he nuzzled his head into the crook of your neck, feeling him inhale against your skin.

“missed you.” feeling him mumble against your skin, “it was killing me knowing there’s someone out there buying you roses.”

“jaehyun, are you drunk?” placing your hands against his bare chest to push him away and look him in the eyes.

he shook his head, “i’m not. i’m serious, y/n.” he took a step closer to you, “why do you not want me anymore?” his breath fanning on you, lips dangerously close to yours, making you feel hazy.

“you know that’s not true.” your voice was so tiny he barely heard what you said. his hands landed on your waist, rubbing on it softly.

“tell me what i did wrong, please.” his voice soft.

“jaehyun..” you warned, feeling him close the gap between the two of you, to which you shut your eyes as you waited for the soft feeling of his lips. but it never came, so you opened your eyes to see him staring at you with a teasing smile on his lips. you glared at him, scoffing. you pushed him away, chucking the sweater at him before retreating and heading to your bedroom.

you heard him call out for you. feeling your cheeks burn from embarrassment. you were about to slam the door behind you, but his strength prevented you from doing so.

“go home, jaehyun.” you sternly said, wanting to bury yourself under the covers. you walked towards the bed, sitting on the edge.

“if you wanted a kiss that bad, you could have just asked.” jaehyun welcomed himself into your room. standing a few feet away from you, this time with the sweater you gave him on your body. he has been in your room plenty of times, so he has grown very familiar with where you keep everything.

“maybe i’ll ask jungwoo instead.” lie. but he doesn’t know that. crossing your arms against your chest. not missing the way his eyes fell on your exposed chest. you were wearing a tiny tank top and lounge shorts since you were just planning on studying all night.

“not fucking funny.” he walked over to you, stopping in between your legs before cupping your face with his hand. “maybe i should remind you who you belong to.” his words making you dizzy.

“i don’t belong to anyone.” you reminded him which made his eyes turn dark; he licked his lips, scanning your face. a sadistic grin forming on his face. he could tell you were trying to convince yourself of what you said, too.

“i thought you were supposed to be smart, princess.” he said, leaning down and planting his lips on yours. the kiss was hungry with the intention of reminding you of what you have been missing. you reciprocated his passion, arms flying to wrap around his neck. his tongue glided over your bottom lip before pushing it into your mouth, exploring your mouth, making you moan lightly. his other hand sneaked down to your clothed core and cupped it, which made you gasp and pull away from the kiss. “look at you, already so wet, and i haven’t even done anything.”

“yeah, and if you don’t do anything about it soon, you know who i’ll call.” teasing him, but he wasn’t having any of it. he grabbed you by your thighs, which you instinctively wrapped around his waist. he laid you down on the bed, your head against your pillows. in a swift motion, your shirt and shorts were pulled away from your body and discarded somewhere in the room.

“I can’t believe you let that asshole touch what’s mine.” jaehyun groaned once he took in the mouthwatering sight in front of him. his intense gaze made you lose all your tough facade, wanting nothing more than to be engulfed by him. he climbed in between your legs, leaning down to kiss you once again, but this time, it was more passion than hunger, savoring your taste.

“i’m not yours.” you whispered against his lips, and you could tell he had enough of your teasing.

“i’ll make you want to be mine.” kissing your jaw, leading down to your neck (making sure to suck on the spot he knew you loved), your chest before engulfing your nipple with his mouth. you whimpered as he sucked on the sensitive bud, his other hand circling the other nub with his thumb and index finger. his tongue exploring every inch of your tits, making you squirm under his touch. your hand flew up to his hair, lightly tugging on it, feeling the slickness from the rain. he pulled away from your chest after flicking his tongue against your nipple one last time. he sat up, grabbing the hem of his sweater and pulling it off him.

you bit your lip at the sight of his toned chest that you absolutely loved. you loved that he took care of himself in every way, especially his body. catching your gaze, he smirked. he, too, loved his own body.

jaehyun pressed a quick kiss on your lips before he went down on your body. your pussy in his face, he wrapped his arms around your thighs, pressing soft wet kisses against your skin. “god, you smell fucking amazing.”

“jaehyun.” you cried out as he licked your wet folds. your hips thrusting, trying to get more, but his arms held you down. pressing a tiny kiss on your clit, his tongue darted out, licking your entrance, lapping around the area. moans spilling from your lips as he fucked you with his tongue. his hand sneaking around to rub your clit, which made you curse his name. “oh my god!” arching your back at the sudden sensation.

“mine.” jaehyun grunted against your pussy, retracting his arm from your thigh, circling around to glide his fingers up and down your folds. “my pussy.” he said before inserting two fingers into your hole, making you gasp. his fingers easily slide in and out of you due to your wetness. the entire room fills up with the sounds of your pussy squelching as he continued to finger you, curling his fingers ever so often, which drove you insane. he attached his lips to your clit, sucking on the sensitive nerve as he continued the motions with his fingers.

“fuck, jaehyun, i can’t–” you barely got the words out as he inserted a third finger, making you gasp, and grip the sheets beneath you. your legs attempted to close but his grip on it prevented you from doing so. you felt the familiar coil gather in your stomach.

“say it, say you’re mine, then i’ll let you cum.” his breath fanning against you, fastening his pace as he fucks you with his fingers.

“mhm, fuck! i’m yours, jae.” your hips bucked upwards as you felt your orgasm coming. “please, let me cum.”

“see, was that so hard?” jaehyun rubbed your clit with his thumb, pushing you over the edge. you screamed out his name, body trembling as you came hard on his fingers. the sight of you arching your back went directly to his dick, hardening against his pants. he pulled his fingers out easily, covered in your cum. he sat up, bringing his fingers to his mouth. “so sweet, so pretty.” licking his creamy fingers clean.

chest heaving as you tried to recover from your high. you met jaehyun’s gaze, seeing him already staring at you. your eyes darted down, seeing his cock begging to be free from his jeans. arm extending, you palmed him through his jeans, hips bucking to meet your touch. “take it off.”

“eager to finally get good dick?” jaehyun smirked, undoing the buttons of his pants.

“get out.”

“taking my pants off right now.” he slid out of his jeans and boxers, cock springing out and bouncing off his stomach. your mouth watering at the sight. your hand reached out to grab his shaft, pumping it before gliding your fingers over the slit, spreading the precum that was leaking out. “fuck, baby.” he moaned, rutting his hips to meet your hand. “you look so good holding my cock.”

“i’d look even better when you finally fuck me with it.” frustration crept up your voice which made him chuckle. he grabbed hold of your hand, holding your wrists above your head while his other hand guided his cock towards your entrance.

“no one will fuck you as good as i do.” ramming his cock into you without warning. the sudden contact made you yelp, wanting to grab hold of him, but his grip on your wrist prevented your movement. “what a dirty little slut. remember, this fucking pussy is mine.” his thrusts were intense, his words laced with venom as he relentlessly fucked your cunt. you could barely let out your words as your breath kept getting knocked out of you.

“o-oh god, jae.” jaehyun was absolutely losing it at the sight of you crumbling beneath him. the pretty noises that were coming out of your mouth were like music to him. sweat trickled down your body as he increased his pace. he let go of your wrists, and your hands flew to grip his shoulders. he grabbed your thighs, pushing them close to your chest. his cock perfectly hitting your sweet spot with every thrust.

“you feel so fucking good.” his hands reached out to pinch your nipples, making you curse out his name.  “you take my cock so fucking well.” you rolled your hips out to meet his pace, leggings shaking from him as he hit all the right spots. your reactions were fueling him even more; he pulled his cock out entirely before slamming it back into your pussy. he gripped your waist as your back arched from the intense sensation, moans getting louder. “you like that, huh? remember who owns you, pretty girl. not that fucking jungwoo, me.”

tears sprang to your eyes from the immense pleasure. not being able to speak coherently, you nodded at his words. nails digging into his shoulder blades as you felt your second orgasm forming in your abdomen. he leaned down, burying his head in your neck, placing kisses on your skin as he continued to rock his hips into you. “i’m so close.” you managed to moan out, legs wrapping around his waist, wanting to be as close to him as possible.

“shit,” jaehyun pulled away from your neck, watching as your tits bounce from his trust, his hand snaked up your clit, rubbing it which built up the pressure in your stomach even more. “cum for me, baby.” his thrusts getting sloppy as he felt his own orgasm creep up.

“oh my god!” you cried out as your insides exploded from pleasure, your walls clenching around his cock as you came.

the feeling of your pussy tightening around his cock brought his orgasm out. his warm cum leaking inside you. “so fucking beautiful.” he groaned, pulling his cock out. your mixed cum spilling out of you. he collapsed beside you.

breaths heavy, you closed your eyelids, wanting to doze off for the night, feeling jaehyun’s arms wrap around you. peeking at him, but his eyes were already trained on you.

“hi.” you whispered.

“be mine.” he mumbled, pulling your body close to him.

“what?” looking at him in disbelief.

“be mine, y/n, be my girlfriend.” he nuzzled his head into the crook of your neck. you knew jaehyun was not one to do relationships. this was one of the reasons why you agreed to keep it physical in the first place. hearing the word girlfriend from his mouth was indeed a new experience, especially since he was saying it to you.

“is my pussy that good?” you giggled.

“yes.” he placed a kiss on your forehead, “and i want to be yours. only yours, and i want you to only be mine.”

“will you stop making out with other girls in the library if i say yes?”

“in the libra–? is that why you left!” he looked at you in shock, “i’m so sorry, i didn’t know you saw that. i promise you she meant nothing to me. i don’t even know her name.”

“wow, that makes me feel so better.” sarcasm rolling off your tongue.

“what about you and that blond bitch! who does he think he is giving you flowers. i fucking hate him.” he sulked, making you snort and laugh. “not funny. i cried, true story.”

so you explained to him what the reason behind the flowers was. his cocky ass got even more cocky when you admitted that it was your attempt to forget him. but you had the last laugh when you found out that even his friends could see that he was miserable without you. you eventually did give him an answer to his previous question, you indeed wanted to be his.

[sister-lucifer]

Genre: Smut 

Summary: Tim is dazed and confused after wandering through these cursed woods for who knows how long, when he encounters a mysterious figure on the dark waters of the lake. 

Content/Warnings: Male reader, frottage, oral sex, the story is from Tim’s POV, the siren is referred to with it/its pronouns, some mystery/horror/unsettling elements, the siren has a prehensile penis, masturbation, attempted/near drowning, underwater ejaculation, it’s left up to interpretation whether or not this actually happened or was just a hallucination, sort of hypnosis I guess? Not really sure what to call it but use of siren song powers 

Like my writing? I take requests! NSFW or SFW for any fandoms in my bio (request rules + masterlist in pinned post)!

Also, please reblog! it’s free, takes two seconds, and really helps me out. 

Feedback is encouraged and appreciated. 

Not fully proofread! Let me know if you see any errors.

Tim isn’t sure how long he’s been walking. It feels like the night has gone on forever, his boots caked in mud from hours of wandering without any vestige of an intended destination. He isn’t sure how long he’s been in these god forsaken woods at all. His frustration and anger have long since melted away to exhaustion, the endless trees silently mocking him as they watch him struggle to pull himself towards a freedom he cannot see. This entire plane of existence is a cruel, horridly sentient monster of phantasmagorical insanity built to break the minds of any who enter, and he can feel the cracks starting to grow throughout his tortured psyche like a starving parasite threatening to encompass him fully.

It feels like his body is rotting.

Like the muscle is sloughing off the bone with every move he makes, joints aching and falling apart as he forces himself to keep going. The night air is thick with the heat and humidity of the summer, threatening to suffocate him with every inhale. Sweat clings to his clothes and his body like a heavy blanket that only serves to weigh him down even more. 

He’s not sure how much he has left in him.

Everything looks the same, nothing but trees in all directions for impossible distances. He hasn’t even seen another animal, no sign of life beyond the green. He’s starting to lose his vision, sight blurring and distorting in the kaleidoscope of leaves that the moonlight filters through. 

Finally the burn in his legs forces him to come to a stop. His chest is heaving when he falls to his knees, desperately trying to catch his breath. He doesn’t have time to stop.

He’s still for only a second before the raging swill of his thoughts becomes far too loud for his comfort. They scream at him for his foolishness, for his stupidity in getting himself lost this badly, in walking right into the waiting maw of the stalking creature he’s been running from like a lobotomized rabbit to the wolf. Dammit, dammit, dammit. 

The ringing in his ears gradually subsides as his breathing levels out. He pushes down his emotions in favor of keeping himself calm; panic will only doom him further. He has to stay in his right mind if he ever wants to get out of here. 

Then, a sound pierces through his clouded mind like the sharpened point of a needle. A sound, finally, other than the noise of his boots on the grass and his heavy breathing. 

Water. 

The sound of water lapping at the shore. 

He’s managed to wander his way to the lake. 

He stands so quickly he nearly falls over, looking around as he discerns where the sound is coming from. He turns to his left, then to his right, ultimately deciding on the former. His walk quickly turns into a frantic sprint. 

The noise gets louder, calling to him that he’s chosen the right direction. He runs faster. The green is starting to thin, he can see something getting closer, he is so damn close—

It takes everything in him not to collapse under the weight of his insurmountable relief when he emerges from the trees to be greeted with the reflection of the moon on the water.

He rushes to the shore, nearly tripping and tumbling down the bank as he makes a frantic dash for the lake. He stops at the edge, kneeling and pushing his hands beneath the surface, gasping softly when the cool water runs over his hands. 

It’s real. 

He’s not imagining this, it’s real. 

A gravely but triumphant laugh bubbles up from his throat as he basks in his victory. Finally, finally he’s freed himself from the prison of trees, even if he hasn’t found his way back home. He cups the water in his hands and takes a drink, not caring to even consider how dirty the lake might be; that doesn’t matter nearly as much as the cool relief that washes over his dry throat. He splashes a bit of water on his face for good measure, soaking the front of his jacket and granting him some reprieve from the hot, muggy night air. 

For a brief moment he debates taking a swim, but quickly shoots the idea down. The lake is vast and dark, he doesn’t trust it enough to let it engulf him entirely. Not to mention the idea of swimming with such a sore and exhausted body isn’t very appealing. 

He looks up and around, thinking that surely there must be some way to cool off without taking the plunge. His eyes land on a wooden dock some ways away, not too far of a walk. 

…That’ll work. 

He makes his way over to the dock, stepping onto it cautiously to test its strength. It creaks a bit, but gives no real protest as he walks down its length, stopping to sit down at the end. He unlaces his boots and sets them at his side before stowing his socks away inside them. He rolls up the legs of his jeans before allowing his feet to dangle over the side, the water reaching up to soothe his sore calves. He lets his head fall back when he sighs with relief, finally allowing himself to relax. He moves to lay back on the dock, folding his hands over his stomach and taking a deep breath. 

Finally, a fucking break. 

No, it doesn’t solve all his problems—he’s still stuck here, after all—but Goddamn is it nice to finally be able to breathe. 

For just a moment, everything is peaceful. Tim even lets himself forget the hell he’s trapped in at present, focusing instead on the feeling of the water gently cooling his legs. It’s nostalgic, almost—reminds him of when he used to sneak out to the pond behind his house to drink with his high school friends. It’s a fleeting comfort, but an appreciated one nonetheless. 

He lays still there until the frantic thudding of his heart slowly reduces itself to a steady beating, until the ringing in his ears quiets fully and he breathe without a struggle. He feels much lighter now that there’s not so much strain on his muscles and joints. He even lets himself close his eyes, just for a moment, the stars shining on the backs of his lids before fading into the dark. 

He debates going to sleep right here. It’s not a good idea, no, but it’s a tempting one, and much more appealing than sleeping in the dirt. He’s too open here, though, too exposed; he couldn’t hide in a timely manner if the need were the arise. No, no sleep yet, no matter how badly he needs it. Just rest. 

Just enough rest for him to keep going. 

That’s all he can safely grant himself at the moment. 

And for now, that’s okay. 

Just this brief peace is enough after the ordeal he’s been put through. 

He focuses in on his breathing, counting his breaths as he inhales and exhales slowly, keeping the rhythm steady as he takes in the gentle quiet of the surrounding world that, for once, has gone still, relieving him of the heavy burden of survival…

…Only for the sudden sound of something splashing into the lake to jolt him out of his calm. 

His eyes shoot open and he sits up so quick he gets a bit lightheaded. He looks around, frantically trying to find the source of the sound and preparing to grab his boots and make a run for it. He stops when he catches sight of…something that has settled on top of a rock in the middle of the lake.

He pauses, squinting through the fog that has now settled over the water. 

Was the fog always there? 

Could it have moved in that fast? 

Damn, how long has he even been here? 

He pushes the questions away for now, too focused on trying to discern what the hell he’s looking at. 

Then, as if it can feel his eyes, the figure move. Tim can’t see it very well, but he too can feel it staring back just before it dives into the water. 

“…What in the fuck?” he mumbles, unable to conjure any other response. 

What the hell was that thing? 

Couldn’t have been a fish, but it didn’t look like any waterfowl or turtle he’d seen. A gator, maybe? No, unlikely—too fast and too damn tall to be a gator. 

He looks down at his feet, his legs still submerged in the water. 

He really should pull them back out. No telling what that thing was.

He should leave all together, in all honesty, he needs to keep moving…

…So why won’t he? 

He swallows hard, eyes cast down at his still legs. He kicks them in the water a bit, but can’t bring himself to pull them back out. Surely by now he should have enough willpower to pull himself away from this…

He winces a bit as the ringing in his ears suddenly returns with an acute fervor. 

No, wait…not ringing. Some other high pitched noise, something more melodic that starts to melt into the ambience. 

…Music? 

No, it can’t be, but he isn’t able to come up with any other name for it, especially with the fog that’s suddenly thickening in his mind, clouding his thoughts like the mist on the water clouds his vision. He rubs his eyes and looks out over the water again. The figure, that creature is gone, and the rock it was perching on is rapidly fading away into the fog. 

This is bad. He has to get out of here, right now, before something terrible— 

He gasps, nearly jumping out of his skin as something splashes in the water a short distance to his left. He looks over quickly, but all he sees is the ripples on the surface left behind by something diving down into the lake. 

There’s no doubt about it now.

Something is in the lake, and it’s getting closer. 

He tries to make his body move, to get up out of the water and onto the dock, but he’s frozen. The more he tries, the more his mind screams at him to do something, the louder the music gets. echoing in his brain and drowning out any voice of reason. The sound is clearer now, a high pitched vocalization carrying a tune that feels so familiar, like something out of his childhood dripping with a viscous nostalgia that clogs his throat and sticks to the back of his teeth. 

Something splashes again, but with the operatic voice forcing its way into his mind he can’t discern which direction it was. All he knows is it was closer. 

Tim scans the water frantically, but the fog has covered the everything. He can hardly see ten feet in front of him. It feels like the cloudy mist is closing in on him with a purpose, with intent, like this was planned. 

His heart nearly stops when he looks down at his feet, only to see a glowing pair of eyes looking back at him from just beneath the water. 

He flinches, but can’t bring himself to pull back. He’s frozen, like something is holding him in place and forcing him to keep eye contact with this creature. The music is the only thing he can hear. The noise of the crickets and the water and the wind are completely gone, completely overtake by the singing. 

Tim watches, completely mesmerized as the creature slowly rises, breaching the water’s surface with wildly unnatural grace. Tim’s eyes widen in shock and awe as more and more of the creature’s form is revealed, its body revealed to him inch by inch, allowing him to take it in. 

The creatures skin is an unsettling greenish-grey, with pulsating gills that gasp softly on the sides of its torso and neck. Its impossibly long hair, tangled with leafy plants, creates a curtain around its face that hides its visage in shadows and cascades down its shoulders and into the water, as if it goes on forever. Tim’s eyes trail downward towards where the legs should be, but he finds none. Instead, the creatures body fades into iridescent scales that reflect the moonlight in a kaleidoscope of colors that swirl in his brown eyes. Anything beyond the top half is hidden by the dark water, but he can imagine what those scales become below the surface.

He should be running.

He should’ve been far, far away by now. 

He’s not as afraid as he should be. 

Why isn’t he afraid? 

He doesn’t have time consider the question before the echo of the singing starts to quiet down. It doesn’t go away, no, but it’s morphing into something else…

Tim watches as the creature swims closer, webbed hands reaching out to grasp his thighs with an unexpected gentleness. He sucks in a breath at the creature’s cold touch, the water on its palms soaking through his rolled up jeans. He realizes now that it’s closer that it’s humming, the soft sound buzzing in its throat with the same tune as the echo of the singing before it. 

The humming is far more soothing than it has any right to be. Tim should be fighting this thing off, pushing it away as it leans in to hum right into his ear, its scent of lake water and fresh plants filling his nose, but he can’t. He just can’t. 

The creature’s skin is cool and soft against his own, wetting his cheek with the water clinging to its hair and face. Its chest brushes his for a moment, and he shudders, though not with disgust. His mind is swimming, completely melted into a useless sludge that refuses to form a thought. He knows he shouldbe terrified right now, he should be running for his life, but it’s getting harder and harder to articulate why. 

He breaths deeply, inhaling the creature’s earthy scent as its ghostly voice seeps into the deepest recesses of his brain. 

Oh, God… 

That feels good. 

He can feel the creature, the siren slowly stripping him of his defenses, peeling the armor off of his carefully guarded psyche piece by piece, and he doesn’t know how to stop it. He’s not sure he wants to stop it. The sensation of his will being broken down, chipped away at by a skilled hand with a chisel of forged steel that leaves no room for argument; it’s almost comforting. 

Tim has spent so long fighting…

…Why shouldn’t he just give in this once? 

The thought rattles around his skull and echoes in such a way that he’s aware it wasn’t entirely his idea, but he doesn’t care. It’s a beautiful epiphany. 

His vision is starting to blur. Most of his senses, in fact, are dulling at what should be an alarming rate. The only thing left in tact, maybe even amplified, is his ability to feel. 

The siren’s touch is intoxicating. 

He’s starting to lose himself. 

Tim shudders as something warm and wet slides over his neck, moving in a manner that is far too articulated. The siren pulls back, licking its lips, and for a moment Tim thinks he can see it mouth the word ‘delicious.’ 

The siren leans in again, this time for a slow kiss on the lips. Tim is stunned at the gesture, but can’t stop himself from kissing back. It’s almost a subconscious action, a base instinct activated by the siren song buzzing in his head. 

The kiss is far from brief, but it doesn’t last nearly long enough to satisfy Tim. He leans forward to try and follow the siren as it pulls away, but it pushes him back with a gentle hand and a cheeky grin. It playfully wags a finger, silently scolding him with only a look from those piercing eyes. 

The siren starts to move lower, and for a moment Tim is afraid it’s about to dive back into the lake, never to be seen again, but instead it stops once it’s at eye level with his groin. Tim sucks in a breath, which only makes the siren’s grin grow wider. Tim catches a split second glance of the shiny teeth that are kept behind its upturned lips. 

The siren’s webbed hands slide inward from where they rest on Tim’s thighs, lazily meandering to the buckle of his belt. The siren’s humming doesn’t cease for even a moment as its nimble fingers slip his belt from the buckle and then from the loops of his jeans with an unnatural grace. It sets the belt to the side on the dock, right next to his boots, making it clear that Tim won’t be needing it anymore. 

Tim’s breath hitches when the siren pulls his zipper down, moving slowly but with intent. It’s teasing him, he realizes in a fleeting moment of clarity, making him wait for whatever it is it knows he wants. His eyes trail down as the siren tugs his jeans down just a bit, enough to expose his half hard cock as it pushes against his boxers. He didn’t even realized how turned on he was. 

Tim bites his lip as the siren’s agile tongue unfurls from its mouth to lick over the bulge in his boxers. He shivers, barely biting back a moan. He opens his mouth as if to speak, but no words come; there’s only a brief stammer before his lips close again, the eyes of the siren drawing him into silent submission. It hasn’t looked away from his face this entire time, refusing to release his gaze. It holds eye contact even as it leans in again, this time latching onto Tim’s hardening bulge with its lips and suckling it through the fabric of his boxers. 

This time Tim can’t stop the noise that falls from his mouth, a choked sound of pleasure that would surely be humiliating if he had any sense left. Right now all he can think about is how badly he wants more. 

The siren’s hands move again, upwards this time, towards the waistband of his boxers. It hooks its claws beneath the fabric and pulls downward slowly, just enough to release Tim’s now throbbing, needy erection from its confines. He sighs with relief at the feeling. He didn’t realize until now how badly he needed that. 

The siren wastes no time wrapping its tongue around Tim’s length, and this time there’s no stopping the shuddering moan that crawls up his throat. The siren’s tongue is impossibly long, moving with complete control as though it were another limb; it leaves no spot of Tim’s cock untouched, coating every bump and vein with the siren’s cool, thick saliva. Tim’s thighs tremble as he watches the creature pleasure him shamelessly, its tongue coiling around his twitching member and sliding up and down the entirety of his length with intent.

The siren has stopped humming, unable to do so with its mouth occupied, but its song still echoes in the trees around them, keeping Tim docile and needy. 

Hesitantly he reaches up, his hand shaking like a leaf in the wind as he moves it towards the siren. For just a moment a look of intrigue flashes in the creature’s eyes, but it quickly morphs into smug satisfaction as Tim’s fingers find themselves nestled into the siren’s hair. 

The siren’s tongue retracts suddenly. Tim’s eyes widen as a question begins to form in his mind as to why, but it’s promptly stamped out when the siren wraps its lips around his cock and sinks its mouth down on him without hesitation. Tim nearly screams, crying out in shock and pleasure before choking on his own voice. The gills on the siren’s neck flex and breathe as his cock is pushed down its slick, invitingly warm throat. The cavity welcomes him happily, as though it was molded to fit his cock perfectly. 

Tim’s fingers twitch as his grip tightens on the siren’s hair, silently begging for more. The creature complies, running its tongue up and down his length without so much as coming up for air. It uses every part its mouth and throat to stimulate his length with a sharp focus. 

One of the siren’s hands slides off of its resting place on Tim’s thigh. It trails down his leg before leaving his body completely, dipping down into the water. Tim follows it with his eyes curiously, watching as the siren reaches down to lightly rub at a spot on the front of its tail. Tim quirks a brow, but quickly realizes what’s happening as the scales part to reveal a fleshy slit, a sheath from which what Tim can only assume is some kind of inhuman cock slides out. It’s visibly slick, almost slimy, and moves much like the siren’s tongue. He can feel the creature let out a soft noise around his cock as it wraps its hand around its length. It’s pleasuring itself, Tim thinks, pleasuring itself to him. 

The siren’s free hand grasps onto his jacket for balance, keeping it upright as it floats in the water. It’s found a steady rhythm in the way it bobs its head up and down on Tim’s length, slowly pulling back and pushing forward just as the water laps at the shore in a lazy but constant manner. 

Tim’s head falls back as a sudden wave of pleasure washes over him, making his entire body shiver with chills. He wouldn’t be able to take much more of this. 

As if sensing his impending release, the siren’s pace increases. It doesn’t become vigorous or messy, only faster, swifter and even more calculated. The siren seems hyper aware of every move it makes, every muscle it flexes in its mouth and throat to make sure Tim never feels less than the utmost sense of bliss. 

Tim can’t hold back his voice anymore. The soft mewls and desperate moans spill from his lips like a waterfall of debauchery that only seems to fuel the siren’s passion. Tim can’t see it with his head thrown back, but he can hear the splashing of the water getting louder and faster as the siren pumps its own cock with more fervor. 

Tim’s back arches, pushing his cock into the siren’s mouth. The creature takes him so deeply its nose brushes his stomach, but it makes it seem so effortless. It knows exactly what it’s doing, and it’s working far too well. Tim doesn’t have much longer. 

“I’m…I-I’m about to—“ he stammers, struggling to get the words out or even put together a coherent sentence. 

The warning is a trigger for the siren. It pauses suddenly, processing the words for only a moment before it pulls off of Tim’s cock so quickly it almost hurts. Tim jumps and gasps, but doesn’t have even a split second to react before the siren grabs onto his shoulders and pulls him down into the water with it. 

He thrashes in the creature’s hold, but the siren’s tail wraps around his ankles and squeezes tightly. He tries to cry out, but his efforts are punished with a mouthful of lake water that firmly halts any attempt at screaming. The lake around them is nothing more but a dark, merciless void of water without any sign of life. The only light is the dim shine of the moon that pierces the surface of the water and the glowing eyes of the siren. 

Tim pushes against the creature’s hold, but it doesn’t budge. It leans in for another kiss, a rougher one that Tim fights this time, but not for long. 

It’s an odd sensation, the feeling of air being forcefully pumped into his lungs from the siren’s mouth, but it lets him breathe. He can’t complain about that. 

In the next instant the siren’s cock has wrapped around Tim’s, picking up right where it had left off on the dock. Little time was lost, and before Tim knows it he’s already nearing dangerously close to his release once more. He doesn’t dare pull aware from the siren’s lips to warn it, though. Surely it knows. 

Just as he’d figured the siren’s length is slimy, almost tentacle like, sticking to Tim’s own cock as it writhes in coils around it. It’s like nothing he’s ever felt before, making him whimper into the kiss with a need so great it’s overwhelming. The siren isn’t immune to the pleasure either; its gills and scales ripple with its impending climax. 

The siren wraps its arms around Tim, gripping at his hair and the back of his jacket as it holds him in place. It’s so desperate to keep him against it. 

Tim cries out into the kiss one last time before his body tenses, his climax hitting him like a truck as his cock twitches and spurts into the water. The siren lets out an odd noise, almost like a dolphin’s chitter before it follows suit, its length pulsing around Tim’s before releasing as well, the iridescent liquid hovering in the water before fading away into the darkness below them. 

The siren’s cock quickly retracts, unwrapping from Tim’s softening length and pulling back into its sheath. It’s as if it were never there, the parted scales moving back to hide the slit once again. 

The siren slowly pulls away, looking down at Tim with an odd expression. It’s not quite a smile, but it carries a sense of self satisfaction and mischief. 

Tim expects to be let go, even kicking his legs a bit to loosen the grip the siren’s tail has on them, but the hold only tightens. Tim kicks again, trying to pull away, but this only earns him more restraint yet again. The siren pulls him into a deadly hug, slotting his body against its own and wrapping itself around Tim. 

Suddenly its touch is no longer soft and welcoming. Its claws dig onto Tim’s back and shoulders through his jacket, which only serves to amplify his panic. The siren squeezes him, forcing the gifted air out of his lungs. He can only watch it escape to the surface as bubbles, unable to retrieve it. 

His thrashing increases tenfold, but he’s tiring fast. The lack of air combined with his exhaustion and now the siren’s humming in his ear once again is disorienting him. He needs to fight, but his body is rapidly losing the will to do so. He’s only a man, and a man has limits. 

He resists the urge to gasp as water starts to leak into his mouth. He’s losing strength by the second, not only from his body straining but also from the siren’s song draining his energy. His panic turns to pure terror as the black spots start to fill his vision. 

The siren won’t let go.

He can’t fight anymore. 

This was a trap. 

This was all a trap. 

He’s going to die here. 

No, no, no— 

The water is filling his lungs rapidly now as his fear overrides his rationality. He’s screaming as much as he can beneath the surface of the lake, using the last of his strength to fight, but he knows it’s pointless. It’s only bringing more water in. His vision is darkening fast, and soon the little sliver of moonlight he had is gone. All he can do is listen to the sound of the siren’s humming, but then that is starting to fade out. 

No, no, no, no! 

Please, God, no…

But God doesn’t come to help, and the siren’s song is barely audible as Tim’s body stills and goes limp. 

This is it. 

He’s sinking into something dark, now, something beyond his consciousness. It’s an indescribable feeling, but an absolute one, one that speaks of eternity and a horrible permanency. 

For a moment he’s aware of his own fate, his own death… 

…And then he’s coughing up water onto the sand, the bright morning sun burning his eyes. 

He turns over into his side, getting onto his hands and knees as he forcefully hacks up the lake water in his lungs. 

The fresh air is a godsend, quickly pushing the water out and taking its place. Tim can finally take a deep breath without drowning. 

He’s back on dry land, and alive… 

…but how?

He’s still dizzy, he doesn’t dare stand up yet, but he does look around in confusion. The sun has finally risen, that much is obvious; it’s warm and bright on his face, almost jarringly so. He can even hear birds chirping in the trees above him. The woods have suddenly come to life, but what feels like only an hour ago it was completely devoid of anything living. 

Did all of that…really happen? 

He has no idea.  

He looks down at himself and realizes he’s still missing his shoes, socks, and belt. His jeans are still rolled up to his knees, and his clothes and hair are completely soaked, as evidenced by the water that drips down his forehead, legs and hands. The zipper of his pants is still down, exposing the black fabric of his boxers.

His missing clothes are nowhere to be found next to him on the shore. 

Slowly his eyes trail down the lake to the dock. He squints as he looks closely, searching for the proof that that thing was real… 

…And there they are. His boots, socks still rolled up inside, and his belt, sitting at the edge of the dock.

Right where he’d left them. 

He stumbles to his bare feet, trudging down to the dock to retrieve his things. His boots and socks are shockingly dry, but that’s certainly not a bad thing. It’s a small comfort that he more than deserves.

He slips them back on, they looks down at his belt. For some reason, he hesitates to pick it up. He makes himself lean down to grab it, though, and takes a moment to inspect the leather in his hands.

It’s untouched. No sign of damage or wear and tear at all. 

He sighs as he zips his jeans back up and pulls the belt through the loops, fastening it back in place around his waist. 

He’s going to chock this up to this goddamned forest screwing with him. He has to if he wants to keep his mind from breaking in two. It’s the safest, least insane explanation he can give to himself. It’s the only thing he’s prepared to hear. 

The ache in his legs returns as a dull thrum as he resigns himself to continuing his journey. It’s painful to leave behind the solace of the lake, to walk away from the soft sound of the water, but with the day’s light he’ll surely be able to find his way out of here. 

He takes in a deep breath, internally psyching himself up before he dives back into the endless trees. 

Only, this time, they don’t seem all that endless. 

Almost instantly the sound of grass beneath Tim’s boots turns into the crunching of a rocky path. He looks down in confusion, eyes landing on beige, rocky dirt that definitely isn’t a natural formation. 

The trail.

He’s found his way back to the trail. 

His eyes widen as he follows the path into the trees as far as his eyes can see. 

Finally, his endless effort is being rewarded. 

He eagerly starts onto the trail, resisting the urge to run until he collapses. He has time, he reminds himself. The trail is a loop; he’ll get back home sooner or later. 

Finally, he’s free from the terror of these woods. Whatever entity that was keeping him trapped has released him, and he’s not going to question it. 

When he gets home he’ll flop down onto his bed, not even considering changing out of his filthy clothes before he does so. He’ll stare up at the ceiling with teary eyes as he thinks about how happy he is to be back home, back where it’s safe and comfortable. 

Inevitably his thoughts will wander back to the creature he encountered, or perhaps imagined; it’s not exactly something one easily forgets, after all. 

But for now, he’s going home. 

And that’s all that matters. 

mdni & reblog banners by cafekitsune

[xanaxiii]

"I DON'T KNOW WHY, BUT I CAN'T GET ENOUGH"

cw: ENGLISH ISNT MY FIRST LANGUAGE! smut, fluff, no use of y/n, wade's perv but reader too so it doesnt matter tho, dirty talk, i hope it isnt turn cringe omg...

words: 15k

an: writing for wade was so fucking hard because a) every time i wrote a joke i felt like i wasn't cut out for it and b) i didn't want it to come out cringe but oh well, judge for yourselves. this is my first smut ever and the only thing i based it on were other oneshots and some random porn videos on twt…anyway, enjoy.

𓆩♡𓆪 

You were sitting on his lap, your gaze fixed on the phone screen you were holding in your hands. The quiet sounds of the game coming from the device filled your darkened room, and the only light in it was the brightness of the screen. You bit your lower lip, struggling with the same quest in the game for the third time. 

A quiet groan of bitterness and boredom reached your ears. You peeked out from behind the screen, looking at your boyfriend, lying on the soft sheets of your bed, surrounded by cuddly toys and pillows. You tilted your head to the side, noticing the grimace on his scarred lips.  -"What?" - you asked, looking at the phone again. Your thumbs moved quickly across the screen, keeping up with your opponent's movements. 

-"Oh, nothing, just... you know, now I know how all those Twitter chicks with big tits and gamer boyfriends feel. Only I don't have boobs and you don't have a penis." - Wade replied, sighing again. He raised his hands, placing them on your soft hips, tugging at the material of your pink shorts that you were wearing. He loved the way you dressed, even though you yourself thought you looked like a rat. Well, if anything, you were the cutest rat he'd ever seen. Your hair was tied in a loose ponytail, and your oversized sweatshirt with those adorable bunny ears on the hood made his heart beat a little faster. 

Whenever he came over to your place and spent the night, he felt like a fucking pervert who was manipulating such a pretty little thing as you. At least that was how it was before the day you gathered your courage and showed him your figurine collection. Hell, even he didn't have that many busty anime girls at home. That's when he realized that you were just like him. Degenerate. 

-”You let me finish! If you don't like it, you might as well leave.” - you replied, pouting your lip in a sad shape. You lost game anyway, Wade's chatter distracting you. You turned your phone off and threw it on the other side of the bed, crossing your arms over your flat chest. -”Thanks, Wade. I've been struggling with this level for a week now and you're showing me no support.” 

-”Hey! You're showing me no support either...you know these sweatpants aren't the most durable material, and god, if you played a little longer, I'd come in my pants.” - he defended himself, moving his hands up to your ribs, tapping your bones through your sweatshirt. A cocky smirk appeared on his lips as he noticed the blush on your cheeks. 

You shook your head, hiding your red face in your hands, feeling how hot your skin was now. You spread your fingers slightly, meeting his teasing gaze, which made you blush even more. 

I guess you'll never get used to his vulgar words, but honestly, you'd never trade him for some...morbidly good guy. 

-"Okay, okay...I'll help you with your problem if you help me get through this mission, okay?" - you mumbled, folding your hands on his chest, slowly moving your hands along his torso, hooking your fingers into the string of his sweatpants. You narrowed your eyes, noticing his growing erection, the sight making your breath stop in your lungs. 

-"You've got it, sweetie. Now wrap your little hands around my friend before I cum on your face." - he laughed, enjoying your shyness, even though you both knew how horny you were as well. You let out a shaky breath, rising slightly on your knees to slide his sweatpants and boxers down. You smiled at the delightful sight of the Hello Kitty print on his crotch, remembering that you were also wearing a set of underwear with that motif today. 

You leaned forward slightly, still not used to his size. His tip was slightly red, and excitement was leaking out of it in long, white drops. You wrapped your hands around his cock, using gentle, trembling hand movements, up and down, listening to his soft moans. You closed your eyes, increasing the pace, running your fingertip over his veins along his member. 

-“Fuck, baby... I can't believe you use those hands of yours most of the time just to click games. And those lips? I can see drops of saliva running down them. Like I was one of your hot soups...” 

-”Wade...shush.” - you whispered, looking up at him from under your eyelashes, shifting your position to capture his cock in your warm lips. You licked his tip, slowly starting to suck and kiss him, giving him your full attention. You tightened your grip on his thighs, trying to ignore his constant chatter. He acted like there was no way to shut him up...okay, his chatter often saved you from pushy guys online, or, rarely, the ones I met on the street. But right now, all you wanted was to listen to those sweet moans and sighs of his, because Wade, like no other, made the best sounds while sucking him off. 

You were still working on him, and Wade could feel me gurgling from within. He clenched his fingers in the sheets beneath him, tugging at the material, turning his head to the side to meet the assessing gaze of one of your teddies. He turned his head back to you, gasping for breath, especially when, just before his orgasm, you pulled him out of your mouth, spitting on his length, smearing the sticky substance along it. 

-“Next time when you give me a blowjob, I demand that you hide all those teddy idiots in the closet or under the bed. They’re judging me, doll. They look at me with those dead eyes of theirs like I’m some kind of...- Oh, fuck-” - his next ramble was cut off by your next movements. You quickly pulled your shorts down your legs along with your white and red panties with lace trim, and collapsed in desperation onto his throbbing cock. 

Leaning over him, strands of your hair brushed his face, and your breath mingled with his. Grunts, moans, and heavy breaths bounced off the walls of the room, and you were really glad that your blinds were drawn and the lights were off. You didn't want to think about what your neighbors, who still considered you polite and well-behaved, might think. You didn't want to ruin it with one of the louder signs of pleasure. 

Your hips movements were exactly the ones Wade liked the most. Careful but full of passion that was practically pouring out of you. He lifted himself off the bed a little, wrapping his arms around your small frame, pulling you closer and joining in on the game as well, not leaving you out in the cold. Your rhythm synchronized, and you buried your face in the crook of his neck, inhaling the scent of his sweat and the vanilla and coconut mist. The scent was intoxicating and unlike anything you'd smelled before. You just...were so lucky. Not only was Wade amazing in bed, but he was also a minority, and he actually had hygiene. He was simply perfect. 

You didn't even realize when you came, everything around you lost its meaning and your mind was only focused on your boyfriend. Your hands tightened on his tense shoulders, tugging at the material of his shirt as you tried to catch your breath and come down from your high. 

"Fuck...if there was ever a ranking of the virgins who give a best fucks, you would win, for real." - his words were muffled by his breathing, his arms still tightly around you. He snuggled into your fragile body, sliding one of his hands down to your ass, kneading the soft skin, laughing in your ear. - "I mean, you know, technically virgins. I can't count how many times we've had sex." 

"I'll give you a gag, I swear to you." - you whispered, lifting your head, tilting it back. Still not moving out of him, you grabbed your phone, forgotten by Wade, and turned it back on. - "I fulfilled the agreement. Now you." - saying that, I handed him the phone, with a gentle smile on my lips, staring at him with puppy eyes. 

-"Oh, oh. You little, sly flirt. Okay, give it to me. As your personal bodyguard, tough guy and guardian angel, I'll help you with this shit." - he launched the game, and the white flash and the huge Mihoyo inscription, almost made him go blind if it was possible with his regeneration system.

He narrowed his eyes, at first not very convinced that he was being forced to play some Chinese production with a lot of characters who look like lolibaits, but as soon as he noticed your sincere satisfaction and the love for him shining in your eyes, he decided that for you he could even play League of Legends with the most toxic fatties on the team.  𓆩♡𓆪 

[val-the-flatworm]

I guess I promised so Here's a review on the '24 roundup of Surge's furry meme's.

I'm going to disappoint people i don't care about.

Let's go.

you are here

what a great start.

-

but hey i've read to the end

and pot/kettle, Rambley.

and i am under no illusion that i'm not a cunt.

-

shall i get out the old ban hammer?

also

you literally just told me to hold your gun.

don't mind if i do.

now if you don't mind, stop hiding behind a female persona, Mister artist.

Yes, it is a man. I checked.

-

this shows that for one you have no confidence in yourself, and secondly that you hold people with talent in high regard.

this shows that once you know you can get what you want, you have no guilt in abusing your connections with others.

let me show you what i did.

artist is treated as my equal, not above or below me. yes, even before i was famous. you are not better than me simply because you have a talent. we all have a purpose to serve. get in line like the rest of us.

Now they have earned my respect due to their previous actions. I treat them like they deserve to be treated for their kindness. Also, why would you commission someone 20 times? You guys need to get laid, I'm serious.

Don't believe me you can ask the artist in the pic. They know how I roll. Me and Lynx go WAY back.

-

lol sucks for you to be lacking confidence. i'm always making small penis jokes about my own 8 inches. yes, i know that would mean i probably have to have both big bones and hyper-mobility. guess what medical conditions i have. trust me, it sucks. i can't get on a busy train without getting weird looks. if you squeeze past me it's very noticeable. i don't wear sweatpants for the same reason the rest of you do. if i wear jeans in public i'd be arrested for indecent exposure. big pp is not the way, bro.

-

-

"i am going to stare intently at this thing i desire, but show visible disgust so that nobody thinks i'm into it."

bro still looked, chat.

bro still looked.

me i turn away. it's more respectful and i genuinely have no interest. oh no i'm not asexual or nothing. i'm just not that easy. get on my level.

-

gees.

and i'm supposed to be the one that's bad at socializing.

-

-

T_T

boy you gotta be content starved to even bother with this.

-

do i need to explain the furries having no game trope?

i mean, this is just a circle jerk of fail at this point.

one i'm gladly not part of.

-

yeah.

making you choose between how you want to be known.

being anonymous made you feel so powerful.

i have nothing to hide.

i'm no creep and i'm proud to be socially unacceptable.

oh no, i'm being cringe with confidence.

point and laugh if you like.

i have far more good friends and a damn fine fanbase.

sucks to be you.

see you in '25 ;p

-

sorry guys but

to quote the Douglas kids

"Win or die"

-

eat a dictionary.

my guys know.

-

to be continued...

[kiestrokes]

Keeping the Cadence | NSFW

🥁Pairing: Jung Hoseok x GN!Reader/You/Yn �� Rating: NSFW! Mature (18+) Minors DNI. 🥁 Word Count: 999 (cutting it close) 🥁 Genre: porn without plot, military au, smut, drabble. 🥁 Warnings: military setting, abrupt ending, inspired by this Hobi.

Sexually Explicit Content: penis in whatever hole you desire, use of gender-neutral terms for the receiver of Hobi's penis, subtle nipple play and hair pulling, Hoseok has a big dick (obvi), rough sex, quickie, slight pain kink displayed, mutual orgasms, latex condoms used.

🥁 Summary: Drill Assistant Jung Hoseok just can't help keeping the rhythm, even while fucking you.

🗝️ Note: I blame @xjoonchildx 🫥 I wrote this in under an hour, has not been beta read! Don't expect too much, it's been awhile and I'm still rusty.

Disclaimers: This is a work of fiction; I do not own any of the idols depicted below. 

The heavy metal door groans shut behind you, effectively sealing you in the dimness of the basement storage room.

“Hurry we only have ten minutes before we have to be back to post” Hobi instructs from behind you. The click of his belt and zipper filled the void of your silence while you worked on sending your pants and panties to a crumpled puddle around your ankles.

“Condom?” You looked over your shoulder just as Hoseok ripped one open with his teeth giving a nod of his eyebrows. You braced yourself over the metal laundry table that was typically used for folding towels, ready for Hoseok.

Not ready enough, you feel his body heat against your back and are jolted when he kicks the inside of your boots with his, effectively spreading your legs as far as the personal shackles of your pants will allow.

“Spit” Hoseok commands, one slender-fingered hand cupping over your mouth as his other hand bends you forward. Following his other demand, Hobi rubs your saliva over your clenched hole exposing it to the cool air of the cellar.

“Ahhh,” you moan as his fingertips toy with the sensitive rim before roughly shoving two fingers inside “Fuck!” Your spine straightens, half from arousal and the other half in delectable pain at the sudden stretch.

“Sorry we don’t have time to stretch you out slowly, I’m kind of-”

“Big.” You finish for him, turning your cheek to graze his nose and fluttering your lashes at his shocked face.

“So, you���ve been looking” He laughs shortly, not the full musical laugh you’ve become accustomed to, this one is laced with carnality. Hoseok’s own eyes lid as he presses himself into you, replacing his fingers with the tip of his cock. His lips part as he slowly works his way into you, with small but firm thrusts.

“Hobi” You moan as he makes it halfway into you.

His hand tucks under your shirt, fingers splaying across your abdomen as he bows over your shoulder for a kiss. Grunting your name into your mouth, as you fervently nibble away at his heart-shaped lips. He stills only once, a lengthy groan rumbling from his chest as he bottoms out. You let out a sharp cry when you feel his hips roll up, his pelvis essentially cupping your ass, rubbing his fat head against the deepest and most sensitive part inside you.

“Shit Hobi,” your body shudders in response but the moment is over as quickly as it came.

Hoseok’s hands glide to fist your waist, drilling your hip bones into the metal of the table as he works himself in and out of your walls. His huffs and grunts and curse words are panted into the collar of your shirt from where he’s pressed across your back.

“Hobi” You whine as he keeps up the insistent pace, drilling in to press into that glorious spot, followed by a thick drag out. You realize he’s fucking you in cadence, and you don’t know why you’re surprised, he is the assistant drill instructor. “Are you fucking me to the marching beat?”

Hoseok’s wild eyes meet yours and he stutters a laugh, “Sorry guess I am, it’s working, isn’t it?” You moan in unison as your insides clench, threatening to suck Hoseok’s massive dick back inside.

“Harder” You gasp as his thrusts sharpen, causing your hands to skate across the smooth surface of the table. Causing Hoseok to fall into you, his hands grasping at the edge to brace himself beside your hips. 

You cry out as his wide base stretches your entrance more, Hoseok sucks air between his teeth as you spasm around his cock. He picks up his rhythm again, angling himself under your ass and thrusting up. Each roll in bruising your hips against the table, you recline back on his chest as he grinds you between the metal and his brutal cock.

“How does it feel? Are you close?” Hoseok’s ear caresses your cheek, his voice a paradox of sunshine compared to the hellish way he is fucking you. You look up to find his brown gaze less hawkeyed than earlier, softened just for you. 

“So good Hoseok, I’m close” You stutter out the last part, feeling his hand under your shirt, gliding across your sternum in search of a nipple that he finds and pinches. Causing you to bow forward and Hoseok lays you flat on the cool table, his other hand on the nape of your neck fingers tugging at the hair there as he snaps his hips into your ass.

“God, you take me so well,” Hoseok lets out a guttural moan as your body tightens under him.

You recite his name in chant as your hands claw against the slick surface. Your undoing is when Hoseok thrusts deep, swirling his hips into the one particular spot as his fingers pinch the nipple he’s still holding onto, and the other tugs are the roots of your hair. You orgasm hard, release spilling down your legs. 

Hoseok gasps out a throaty version of your name as his cock glides you through your climax, your walls squeezing his length so tight you have no idea how he manages to make his way back inside until you feel it. His thighs stiffened against yours, and his release spilled into the latex of the condom. Hoseok’s hands are ripped from your body, and he slams them into the table, pressing himself as deeply inside of you as he can get. 

The room is filled with shuddering breaths as the two of you slowly descend back into your bodies. Hoseok withdraws, groaning as you clench at his retreat. 

“Two minutes,” You heave yourself upright after glancing at your watch and begin to shakily redress. While Hoseok trashes the condom and mirrors your movements, in an unfazed fashion.

His sharp eyes are back as his gaze washes over your appearance, giving it a quick nod of approval, he slips out the door.

© COPYRIGHT 2023 by kiestrokes All rights reserved. No portion of this work may be reproduced without written permission from the author. This includes translations. 

[13as07]

Patience #4.5

(Jiraiya Smut)

[Artwork is not mine! Credit to Kare-Chikin]

Requested by: Anonymous

Word Count: 4,703

Warnings and/or Pre-Notes:

You know the deal by now; Part four from Pervy Sage's POV

Also super long like most of my Jiraiya POVs

Titty Fondling

Nick Names: Sensei, Little One, Sweet Thing, Princess, Obedient Girl, Kitten, Sweetheart

Masturbating

Power Difference (Teacher/Student)

Nude/Sexual Modeling/Pictures

Oral (Female Receiving)

Hair Pulling

Overstimulation

Cock Warming

———————————————————————

     I feel like I'm walking on air as I exit Tsunade's office. My new book passed its proofreading, which leaves nothing but the illustrations to do and my lovely ex-squad mate gave both me and my kunoichi 'a reasonable amount' of time off so I can work on it. Nothing but my house, my student, and me... and the six hundred and forty or so panels I need to illustrate, send out, and get approved.

     It doesn't take long for my student to fall into my sights, the beautiful girl waiting for me a few paces away from the office. "Little One," I say, quickly settling behind her. She looks gorgeous today. She looks gorgeous every day, but the sun filtering through the windows makes her features stand out more than usual.

     "Guess what?" I mutter, slightly giving in to my wants. The sun showering on her and the promise of a lot of alone time has my groin tumbling. I toy with the hem of her shirt, quickly passing it, my fingers crawling up the skin of her sides.

It doesn't take long for my hands to cup my Princess's breasts. They're warm and soft and melt through my fingers like butter. How'd I get a partner so perfect? So pretty? So damn addictive?

It also doesn't take long for the material of her bra to upset me. I want to feel her skin on mine. I run my thumbs over the edge of her bra, debating how likely Tsunade would take away my time off if she found me fiddling with my Sweet Thing's chest right outside her office. I decide I don't care very much, letting my fingertips slide down, cupping her bare breasts.

"What?" My Little One mutters, her breath heavy as I mess with her. I shift my hands on her, sliding my thumbs over her nipples, encouraging them to perk up.

My excitement only grows as I watch my Princess's eyes flickering around the hallway. No matter how many times or how many places I mess with her, she's always so anxious about getting caught. It's adorable.

I tilt my head down, resting it against hers, my lips pressed against her ear as I speak. "Tsunade agreed to give me some time off so I can work on my concept sketches for my new book." I catch my Sweetheart's earlobe between my teeth, softly biting it once my words are out. I focus on her body, pinching her nipples when I bite down on her ear and then softly twisting them when I relax my jaw. Her breath picking up doesn't help my swallow professionalism. It encourages my thoughts of pushing her against the wall and enjoying her sweetness.

"Oh, that's good," my kunoichi whispers, the sound of people down the hallway almost drowning out her voice. Her hands cling to my arms, trying to shove them off.

     I tug my hands out of her bra, adjusting the material before clinging to her hip bones. "Yes it is, Sweet Thing, and you, Princess, are going to help your Sensei," I tell her, herding her down the hallway as I start pulling up her dress. Maybe a quickie in a supply closet won't be too bad.

     "How am I going to do that?" My Little One asks, leaning her weight against me.

     "Well, you're the muse for my book so why not be the muse for the artwork as well?" I counter, enjoying the way her cheeks redden the higher I pull her dress up.

     "What?" She mutters, leaning her head back to look at me.

     "Don't worry about it, Little One. Just know you're going to be my pretty little model." The thought of my student modeling nude makes blood rush to my penis. I grind my growing boner against her ass, deciding a quickie is the way to go.

                       ————————————

     My naked Princess clings to me, squirming in my hold as her nails dig into my shoulders. "Sensei, I can't," she whimpers, squirming against me more.

     This is going to be a long and hard battle to stay focused on my task. "Yes, you can," I encourage her, wiggling my fingers under hers so I can undo her hold on me. "I've seen you naked before, I've seen you in the shower before, I've gotten you off in the shower before. How is this any different?" I ask, placing her in the bathtub, my eyes jumping over her nudity.

     She's so cute, thighs rubbing together and cheeks a soft pink as she looks up at me. "Because you're watching me get myself off," my Sweetheart whines, standing on her tippy toes to grab at my shoulders again.

     "I have before. I watched you use a shower head to get off and then watched you hump a pillow. The only difference is I'm going to sketch it this time," I remind her, catching her wrists before she has the chance to get a grip on me again. My hand looks good wrapped around both of her wrists, reminding me how much bigger Mr frame is compared to her.

     "Sensei," my Sweet Thing whines again, wiggling her arms around to try and get her hands free as I turn the water on.

     I tighten my grip, shifting her forward before I rest my face against hers, our eyes locked as I speak. "Sweetheart, we have three options. One, I pay a model to act out your little sins so I can do my concept art. Two, you can be an Obedient Girl and act out the scenes again while I sketch. Or three, you act out the scenes and I take photos to refer to. The choice is yours."

     I hope she chooses option three. My poor Princess wouldn't be able to stand being in the same position long enough for me to do a sketch, let alone mess with herself for that long. Though as long as she doesn't pick option one I'll be fine. I want to draw her, not some other woman.

     "Option two."

     I let go of her wrists before bending down to kiss her. "There's my Obedient Girl. Now, you get all wet and soaped up while I go get my pencils and sketchbook," I tell her, starting to work myself up. Maybe it wasn't the smartest option to have my Sweetheart model for me.

     I shake the thought out of my head, turning the shower on before I turn away. As I leave the room, a whimper and the shower curtain closing fill my previous space.

     I hurry around my office, collecting my things as fast as I can before returning to the bathroom. When I snap the curtain back open, my blood rushes so fast that I'm a tad worried I'm going to pass out. I rest my sketch pad and pencil case on the sink before turning my attention back to my pretty kunoichi. "Let's fix your position, Princess," I whisper, slowly moving my hands to position her how I remember her looking during the not-so-long-ago accidental peep show I had. "See? Perfect, and so sexy, Little One," I compliment when she's in place.

After a beat or two, I pull away from her, using the toilet lid as a makeshift seat. Once my pad is in my grasp, it becomes easier to focus on the task at hand. I sketch out a quick outline, eyes jumping around to start laying out some simple details.

"Jiraiya," my Little One whines, her eyes swimming in arousal, big and round and already ready to burst with her first orgasm. She isn't going to survive this.

"Sweet Thing?" I whisper, my focus caught on her pussy. I could say screw it and fuck her against the shower wall, try my best to sketch the situation from memory.

"How long is this going to take you?"

"I don't know, Sweetheart," I whisper, trying - and failing - to keep my mind where it needs to be. I need my sketches, I need to finish them semi-soon, I need to send them out, I need to finish my book. "The whole detailed sketch will probably take thirty to forty hours but right now I'm just doing a rough outline. That'll take an hour or two," I ramble, snapping my eyes closed to see if that'll help; it doesn't.

"I can't," my Princess whines, making my eyes snap back open. "Two hours?! I can't do that. Sensei." My title comes out as a moan, my Little One's orgasm spilling over.

"Princess," I whisper, my eyes trailing the path of her cum mixing with the water and soap of her shower. "I gave you options," I remind her, sinking to my knees next to the shower, and using my pencil to spread her legs apart further. For research, only research, and not because I like how wet and gushy my kunoichi's pussy gets when she cums. "We can do option three if you prefer," I mutter, dropping my pencil to the ground before wrapping my hand around her thighs, and tugging her legs further apart.

A little taste won't hurt. It'll help even, I'm willing to bet. If I have the fresh taste of my Sweetheart on my tongue it'll help me sketch her better. Or, at least that's what I'm going to use to justify disregarding my work.

I tug my Sweet Thing's leg up, resting it on my shoulder, spreading her open even wider. My free hand wraps around the one she's using to hold the shower head, keeping it put to encourage a second orgasm to spill out and drip onto my tongue.

"Jiraiya," she whimpers, taking a fistful of my hair. My tongue slides past my lips, eagerly sliding across the delicious mess on her legs. I let out a hum, eyes bouncing up for a second to make sure the water streams are still aimed toward her clit. "I don't... what if... my photos get out?" My Sweetheart stumbles out, leaning her weight against the shower wall. That's another pretty sight, maybe I'll add that one to my book too. But, for now, I need to focus on making her feel safe. My book can wait.

I move forward, helping her lean against the wall easier as I slide my tongue into her pussy a few times. "I'd never let that happen, Sweetheart. Whatever needs to happen for you to feel safe, I'll make happen. You can keep them, you can be around when I need them for my sketches, we can get a lock box for them, you can have the only key to the box, whatever you want," I coo between more dips of my tongue. I swear I could live off her pussy and her pussy only.

Nails dig into my scalp, heavy breathing and small noises spilling out between my Sweet Thing's words. "Oh... okay... ya... that... that seems okay." She comes undone again, fresh and warm juices spilling onto my tongue. My eyes flicker up as I flatten my tongue against her cunt, trying to slurp up as much as I can before the shower water washes it away. "Sensei, I can't... I can't take anymore. Please?" She mutters, nails no longer scratching me, but her hand does ball up my hair, tugging my head away.

I give in, letting my Little One pull me away from her pussy. "Whatever you want, Princess," I mumble, my eyes jumping around her form. Her chest is pumping a mile a minute, her legs threatening to shake, and her eyes soft and ready to burst into tears any second now. "Do you think you can hold on long enough for me to take some pictures? Are you going to be okay with that? Can Sensei take pictures of your pretty cunt?" I ask, forcing the shower streams to move up and down, giving her sensitive clit a small break.

Her head shakes rapidly, my Princess's legs fully shaking now. Dear Lord, her pussy is so wet and warm and inviting. I could just fuck her, watch the tears roll down her cheeks as she babbles about wanting more but wanting me to stop... but I have work to do.

I slowly climb to my feet, taking a second to kiss my Sweetheart. "What an Obedient Girl. You're so good to me. You keep this right here," I order, running the streams down her pussy once more before situating it against her clit again.

"Yes, Sensei," She mumbles, pulling a silent laugh from me. I peck her lips again, taking my time with the kiss before I pull away.

I tear through my office again, in search of my camera. The whole time my dick pulses almost painfully. Lord, I should fuck my Little One, I should fill her trembling pussy with my cum, I should do my work. Right, work. That's why we're in this situation, because of my book, my work.

Once my camera is found, I dart back into the bathroom, being met with a crying Sweetheart. Her legs look ready to give out, tears spilling down her cheek with just as much cum and water spilling down her thighs. "Sensei," she whines, causing me to lunge forward. I press my lips against hers again. When I pull back, I snap a picture of her messy face. I think that'll be the cover photo for my book.

When the picture prints out, I eagerly shake it, excited to see how pretty my Princess looks in her photo. Once I'm done looking over the photo, I settle it on the bathroom sink. "Just a couple of photos, Sweetheart," I tell her, gently situating her back into her original position.

After My Sweet Thing is situated, I pace backward, snapping a string of pictures. Once I'm sure I have every possible position, I decide I want her back how she was before I left. She looked hot like that too. "Alright against the wall again, Princess," I mumble, helping her shift back into place. "Just like that. You're such a pretty model. Who's Sensei's pretty model?" I ask, taking more pictures from different angles, even going far enough to adjust her position a time or two.

By the time I'm satisfied with the range of photos, my Sweetheart is a trembling mess from a mix of the chilled air running across her wet body and the overuse of her pretty cunt. What a poor Little One. "You did so good," I praise, setting the camera down next to the stack of photos I've collected.

I take the shower head out from her shaky fingers, putting it back in its place before turning the water off. "Let's get you warmed up," I say, wrapping my kunoichi in a fluffy towel, and rubbing it up and down her sides to help her warm up. "And get my pretty model a warm drink and some kisses and maybe a nap," I continue to coo, peppering kisses across her nose.

Her hands shoot forward, digging her nails into my shoulders as she clings to me. "And then you'll fuck me?" My Princess asks, a huge smile on her face despite the tears still rolling over her cheeks.

"Yes, Sweet Thing. Then I'm fucking you," I laugh, picking her up and looping her legs around me. I swear my student would live on my cock if I'd let her.

                       ————————————

     "Sensei?" My Sweetheart's voice rings out, tugging my attention away from the art piece I've been working on.

"Sweetheart?" I mutter, a smile already tugging at the corners of my mouth. She's been so patient, so sweet, so perfect over the past couple of weeks. I've been drowning in work, trying to get at least a handful of sketches finished to send to my editor. That's left me in my office almost all day most days. "Come here, Princess. Sensei wants to hold you," I mutter, craving the feeling of having her in my arms.

My Little One comes racing towards me, footsteps careful as she makes it through the maze of a floor my office is at the moment. It feels like all my stress and tension melts when she settles into my lap, a soft sigh escaping my lips once the weight of her is pressed into me. My student's eyes skirt over my desk, eyeing my recent sketch.

I rest my head against her neck, wrapping my arms around her to feel more of my Little One's body against me. "Do you like it?" I ask, a bit worried she won't enjoy the picture. The photo is very much her, based on her, everything of her, but I have made changes.

"It looks cool. My hair is sketched a lot longer and my thighs are puffier. My skin tone is a bit darker too." Changed she has noticed apparently.

"You're the muse for my book and for the art of that book. That doesn't mean I want people to see you in those ways. Making small adjustments to the artwork makes it a little more the character and a little less you," I explain, shifting my head so I can brush my lips across her jaw.

It's a truthful answer, she is everything in my new book. On the other hand, I would go ballistic if people figured out it was my Sweetheart that I was writing about, that I was drawing, if people saw her in those ways, thought about her in those ways.

There's a tear in my jealousy, a dribble of worry that my Sweet Thing is taking the changes in the wrong way. "It doesn't mean I want your hair longer or your thighs thicker or your skin darker. You're perfect as is, Little One," I mumble, shifting her head so I kiss along the other side of her head.

"Promise?" She whispers, squirming in my lap.

"Promise," I echo, pressing her to my chest so she'll calm down a bit. My focus shifts to searching for my pile of art, wanting my Little One to look them over. I should give her back the photos I'm done with too. "I'm done with those ones. Destroy them if you want or I can get you a lockbox next time I leave the house like I said I would," I tell her, giving my kunoichi a few options as I place the photos into her grasp.

My Sweetheart shoves her photos into her pocket, attention on my hands flipping my folder open. "I'll probably destroy them. What's in the folder?"

I carefully lay out the finished art, worried about messing them up. "These are the pieces I've finished. I've done two or three versions of each one so there are options," I tell her, cuddling her in my hold again. I love it when I get to hold her like this, get to smell her, get to feel the warmth of her body. I could die a happy man in this situation.

My eyes trail over her face, watching her reactions to them. "After I finish the piece I'm working on now, I'll send out whatever ones you approve," I tell her, squeezing my student, continuing to enjoy the feel of her against me.

Princess's head tilts back, eyebrows pressed together as she looks at me. "Whatever ones I approve?"

"Ya," I mutter, a little confused. Of course I'd ask her permission before I sent out any of my art. Again, they don't look like her but they are her. "I might have changed them up so you're not recognizable but it's you at the core. If you don't like one or aren't comfortable with one or simply don't want it published then I won't send it in," I explain, shifting my position in hopes it'll help the anger I'm feeling, at the situation, not at my Sweet Thing.

She leans against me, eyes still scanning the artwork. "That's very thoughtful of you," my Sweetheart mutters, meaning it nicely but pissing me off even more.

What kind of people has my student been with before me? Why wouldn't she expect to have a say? To have a right to decide what can and can't be published? "It's my job to make you feel safe, Little One. It's not thoughtful, it should be expected," I mutter, pressing my lips against her neck, trying to use it to calm myself down. It doesn't matter, it's not her fault, I'm taking care of her now and that's all that counts.

"I still appreciate it," my Princess mutters, squirming in my lap again so she can get a better look at the art.

                       ————————————

     I shift in my spot again, careful not to wake up my Sweetheart as I move. I've needed to pee for an hour now and I don't think I can keep putting it off, but I don't want to wake her. I already stirred her awake when I took my shirt off.

Carefully, I wrap my arms around her, moving slowly as I lift her. "Jiraiya?" She yelps, panic in her voice as she grips my hair.

My head is snapped to the side because of my Princess's grasp. "Sorry, Sweetheart, I was trying not to wake you. That didn't work out. I need to go to the bathroom. I'll be right back," I shortly explain, eyes scanning her face, watching the panic melt away to contentment. Reluctantly, I set her down, pressing my lips to her forehead before pulling away.

I take my time going to the bathroom, walking slowly, and stretching my muscles during my little break. When I re-enter my study, the thought of this being a longer break is burned into my head.

Sweetheart is sitting on my desk, her almost bare back facing me, sitting in nothing but her underwear. Maybe a long break wouldn't hurt, but I'm almost done with my sketch. If I give in now, the rest of the night will be spent having sex and not working. We're going to wait, just long enough for me to finish.

"I have work to do, Sweet Thing," I mutter, slowly walking through the room, towards my temptress of a student. "I need to finish and send out my concepts." When I get to my desk, I let my arms snake around her body, feathering my fingers over her covered pussy.

Princess's legs fall open, her back leaning into my chest, and her head lying on my shoulder. What a pretty Obedient Girl I have, so eager to be pleased, so willing to give me her body. "So? It wouldn't hurt to take a break," she tempts, trying to chip away at my decision.

My arms tighten around her, leaving her pressed against my body as I lift her off the desk, starting the short walk back to my chair. "I have work to do. You have to wait, Little One." My unwillingness to cave gets me a spoiled princess acting like dead weight and a pitched whine.

I settle back in my chair, my Little One's hips instantly going into action, grinding against my growing boner. "Please? Just a quickie," she tried again, trying to pull my hand towards her cunt.

It's probably not the best choice, but I do give my kunoichi a bit of relief, rubbing circles into her clit. "Have some patience, Princess," I order, keeping my fingers light as I shift most of my attention back to the drawing I've been working on the last few days.

Little One grips my arms, nails digging into me for the hundredth time as she whines into my shoulder. I swear I'm more scratch marks than skin at this point. Again, her legs widen, openly putting her growingly slick panties on display for me, only a glance away. What an obedient girl I have. "Jiraiya?" She whines, nails deeper into my skin now. Maybe she's more needy than obedient.

"Sweetheart, you can't stay in here if you're going to be noisy. I'm trying to focus," I tease, giving into her neediness by adding just a tad more pressure and moving my fingertips faster.

"Jiraiya!" She whines again, threatening to break the skin of my arms.

I let out a sigh, knowing if I don't give in just a bit, I won't get any work done or my dick wet. What a needy sex-driven student I have. "Stand up, Sweet Thing," I order, burying my hand into her hair and using it to force her to her feet.

I keep her in place, enjoying the view of her ass as I tug my dick out. If she's so eager to be filled, then who am I to deny her? Once I'm free, I fix my hold on her hair, ready to tug her back into place. "Turn around."

My Obedient Girl is well, obedient, turning around to face me. Her eyes are stuck in my dick, mouth almost watering as she looks at it. "Jiraiya, please?" Sweetheart whines, thighs rubbing together as the rest of her almost vibrates with want.

     "I already told you, have some patience, Little One. For now, come warm your Sensei's cock," I order, letting her go and spreading my legs wider so she can situate herself.

     She does just that, crawling into my lap after dropping her panties on the floor. "Sensei," Princess whines, wiggling my tip into her pussy before letting herself tumble down the rest of my dick.

     Before I have the chance to stop her, my student starts riding me, fucking herself on my cock. I grin at her, settling myself into a more relaxed position, happily watching her bounce like the hormonal bunny she seems to be. "Look at you. Princesses don't act like this. What are you acting like Little One?" I tease, annoying the way her pussy squeezes me because of the soft degrading.

     Like usual, her hands shoot forward, gripping my locks and using them to help herself bounce faster. "I... I don't... know," my Sweetheart whines, her eyes as desperate as her movements, so eager to have me fill her pussy before I make her sit still.

     I tilt my head, pressing a kiss or two against her wrist before I continue mocking her. "You're acting like a desperate kitten in heat but Sensei asked you to be a little cock warmer. Be an Obedient Girl for your Sensei." I grip her hips, forcing her movements to stop and in turn, denying myself the orgasm that was threatening to burst and fill her.

     My unhappy girl yanks on my hair, whines and whimpers spilling from her because of my no. "Sensei, please? I want sex," Princess whines, squirming and failing to get out of my hold.

     I tilt my head again, this time forward so I can kiss her between my words. "And I need to finish my work. Show Sensei those pretty patience we've been working on. If you're good, I'll spend the rest of the night pleasing you, Sweetheart." It's not fair of me and I know that. She's been patient the last two weeks, letting me work, modeling so pretty for me, but I need to finish my work.

     "Promise?" She whispers, giving into my orders and stilling herself.

     "Promise," I repeat, moving us forward and littering her shoulders in kisses. My student's hands fall from my hair to my shoulders, head buried into my neck as she sighs. "There's my Obedient Girl," I praise, adjusting us so I can continue to work, purposely shifting my dick buried in her soaking pussy to tease her.

     She tightens around me, more babbled whines slipping past her lips. "Hush, Little One. Sensei is trying to work," I continue to mock, tilting us back a bit so I can thrust my hips up, making her bounce on my cock.

     Pressure is added to her fingers, nails present against my skin again and legs tightening around me because of my soft teasing. "Jiraiya?"

     "Patience, Sweetheart," I remind her, fully planning to test her patience as I finish my work. Maybe I'm not as nice to her as I thought.

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[pseudowho]

Okay so i was thinking about the “belly bulge” stuff right? Generally gives me the ick cause it absolutely isn’t in the realm of possibility for me, and I got to thinking…”there is not a single person with a vagina where you can see the ‘belly bulge’” BUT then I started second guessing myself because i know that people with a uterus, the cervix and uterus is kinda the end point. People who’ve surgically transition have a “back” (for lack of better term) but what about people who’ve had radical hysterectomies? Is there a back? Feels like a stupid question cause of course logically it seems like there should be or else the intestines may slide down (right?) but i don’t know anyone who’s had a hysterectomy of that nature. Also?? Anal sex???? Could you see a bulge there?? Like ????? I feel like i should know this: i went to nursing school (i dropped out but STILL)

See this is the sort of stuff I won't answer here (I will in DMs because it's a bit graphic), but I do know. It's part of my job to! R.e. the hysterectomies, surgeries...ultimately if anything they will make the vaginal canal even shorter than before. R.e. anal sex, the rectum is situated between the sacrum/spin and the pelvic bones at the front, with other pelvic and abdominal organs in front of it, so...yeah.

In short...in NONE OF THESE SITUATIONS WOULD YOU SEE A BELLY BULGE. The genitalia and sex organs are pelvic organs. Even if a penis did happen to go through an open cervix (which doesn't just happen, there are limited occasions where a cervix would just be OPEN like that), the uterus is still firmly anchored within the pelvis. I mean, the uterus only reaches above the brim of the pelvis and is abdominally palpable a good few months into a pregnancy.

So yes...belly bulge from massive cock isn't a thing BUT to a large extent the smut described in fanfiction isn't a thing-- it's just fun, if unrealistic. Men without refractory periods? Women being wetter than a waterslide at Disneyland? Veritable gallons of cum? Aside from a few weird and rare circumstances, these things generally aren't the way it really is.

I guess what concerns me, is that while the sexually experienced amongst us know this, and enjoy our smut with a punch of salt, I think if TUMBLR was where I was receiving a sex education...well, let's just say I'd be shocked and disappointed by my first time.

-- Haitch xxx

[kpforpresident]

first line fic game

tagged @dreamsaremywords, @sassymajesty, @dysco-lymonade

rules: don't reblog the first one, make a new post! look at the first lines of the last ten (10) stories you published. look to see any patterns you notice yourself, and see if anyone else notices any!

1. flowers in your hair : The door chimed, a cheery little note that pulled Lexa out from where she was intently reading, chin propped up in her palms.

2. Good Vibrations : Lexa is staring particularly hard at the one penis-shaped water stain in the damp ceiling, trying her absolute hardest not to eavesdrop on the couple that was standing a stone’s throw away, arguing hotly next to a hot pink, two-foot-long dildo that Lexa would hazard a guess at being at least as large around as her forearm.

3. Call Me By Your Name: The summer night Clarke met Lexa was hot and syrupy, with sunlight streaming in thick buttery ribbons through the dappled olive trees that dotted the Griffin’s family villa.

4. i carry your heart with me (i carry it in my heart): Eyes watering from the biting cold winds that whipped endlessly through the streets of New York, Lexa toed her shoes off as soon as she had crossed the warm threshold.

5. Can You Feel My Heart?: Slow, fat water drops trailed their way down damp cave walls, wending unsteady paths to join larger puddles quietly gathering in the uneven stone of the floor, shimmering with fading light as the last smudges of daylight scrape against the horizon.

6. deep in our bones the old songs are waking, sing them with voices of thunder and rain: The waves are towering, writhing monsters as they crash over the bow of the ship, the wooden helm creaking ominously as bitingly cold sea water gushes across the already saturated deck.

7. we were born sick, you heard them say it (take me to church): Clarke stepped into the confession booth, feeling the fancy cut glass tremble in her hand as she did so, pulling the worn cotton curtain to safely enclose her from the dark echoes of the silent, empty church pews.

8. if the silence takes you then i hope it takes me, too: Clarke shivers as the wind whips icily around her, pulling her thick black peacoat tighter to her frame as she hunches her shoulders for a brief respite from the chill.

9. House of the Rising Sun: The heat in the south isn’t like other places.

10. What the Ground Gave Us (The Maiden and the Selkie): “Lexa,” Clarke breathes, smiling into the soft skin in front of her as Lexa peppers small, loving kisses over her eyes, her nose, onto the apples of her cheeks.

tagging @butmakeitgayblog @100hearteyes @syngularitysyn a @mozz14 @talktomeinclexa & whoever wants to do it, consider yourself tagged by me [boop], esp because i think most of my tumblr friends have done this!

[littlecourse]

why i call myself transfem as someone in a perisex afab body

i noticed that there's a lot of assumptions that go around whenever a system member in an afab body calls themselves transfem that dont apply to me. i also noticed that nobody ever talks about my experiences or even considers them so i guess im gonna have to be the one to talk about it

i think the first assumption that gets on my nerves is that i just formed as a woman with a penis and "decided to be transfem" (or reduce/d transfemhood down to "woman with penis") when i formed as a guy. (i know some trans people think of themselves as always being their current gender, even in my own system. i find the language of changing genders to be more comfortable to my journey)

i did have to go through the full journey of figuring out that im a woman and not a man. i did have to ask myself the hard questions. it's uncomfortable when people ignore that i have had a transition and it was towards femininity and womanhood

the next assumption is that we havent gone through t-dominant puberty or have finished e-dominant puberty. the effects of 5 years of testosterone on my body starting from the age of 16 dont give a shit that im a woman. i dont think they make me less of a woman either but i know i don't pass as one to outsiders. even in a wig and mask and dress, i get asked my pronouns the moment i speak. it probably doesnt help that my preferred names are traditionally masculine, but they're still my names when i dont conform to their cultural connotations

and its frustrating as fuck to not have accurate resources on (de)transitioning medically and to have to go off of mtf timelines and experiences for some semblance of an idea. its frustrating to be in a grey area of "transfem but not bodily mtf" and want to talk about shared experiences and ask for relevant advice but to not know how to navigate the fact that there are experiences that we don't share without making the conversation about nonshared experiences.

its also frustrating to be in the grey area of "trans and detrans". none of us hate our body but i hate the way its percieved. i dont regret testosterone or the extra body hair or the deepened voice or the sharper bones or the larger calves. i didnt form before we had these traits and its been so long that i cant remember what it was like beforehand.

this is just what my body looks like right now. this is just what i look like right now and it's important to me that i don't forget that just because i also look like my innerworld appearance. im not just my body, but my body is part of me.

i do use detransfem/retransfem/transfem fairly interchangeably for myself as opposed to exclusively using transfem, but i don't see discourse over the other labels in system spaces so i dont feel any need to defend my use of em

[mad-c1oud]

what other wip u have? any little details or teasers u willing to share? :3

omg anon the amount of drafts i have...... here i'll give you some sneak peeks and behind the scenes on what I can! feel free to ask for elaboration on anything and if i can't give it i'll let ya know!

scrapped outlast trials fic with the squad charlie, jaiden, baghera, and cellbit. fave line has to be "Charlie is about to make Penis Man just a Man. "

Official first attempt at starcicle that was actually a offshoot from a twaho chapter, scrapped for immi

starcicle bedrot fic from when i was super sad

"divorce? por favor?" take a guess lmao

Outline for starcicle timeloops that's paused indefinitely, no name

indulgent stuff that stares at me from the file, knowing, judging

at least 5 versions of the same immi chapter that was giving me Hell writing a while back, still havent cleaned them up or trashed the duds

some misc wips and their titles: "human touch", "(repaint my mind) blood orange", "iron lungs", "maze", "bones", "growing up is kind of spooky, huh?", "second chances", "gdxgfchjg"

starcicle royalty au and it's freakishly long outline (seriously it's at 3k rn and I had to take a break)

Tadaaaaaaaa!!!! my drafts are scary, especially when a chapter isn't listening to me bc then i need a new doc and then that happens at least 4 times and i die a little. one title ended with the words "GOD HELP ME LET THIS END" lmao

thank you for the ask!!!!! :3 if anyone wants to know more about something just ask, i'll see what I can share...

[nabibeans]

Unexpected: Before Ateez

Part 3: TW:: sasaeng fan, transphobia, physical assault.

•

•

Their dinner was quiet; Seonghwa’s mother giving Hongjoong an insight on what pregnancy would look like for the first three months, barely any showing, morning sickness, aches, chills, etc. He’d feel like he had the flu rather than being pregnant, and that was okay for Hongjoong, he wasn’t really all that excited for all the stuff that came with pregnancy. But he was excited to meet his baby when that time came; to be a parent with Seonghwa, to have the rest of Ateez as uncles. Finishing up their meal Seonghwa’s mother got up to pay for the bill leaving the young couple at the table.

“Feeling a little better?” Seonghwa asked, rubbing his lover’s shoulder. “Yeah much better, way less freaked out now.” Hongjoong nodded as he wiped his hands on a napkin. “I need to use the bathroom, I’ll be back. Tell eomma?” Seonghwa nodded, kissing his boyfriend’s cheek before sending him off. Hongjoong checked twice before slipping into the men’s restroom; thankfully it was empty so he would have no problem slipping into a stall, locking the stall he pulled his pants down to do his business then paused. A pair of footsteps headed towards his exact stall, then a knock. “Uhm..I’m in here?” He squeaked out pulling his pants back up. “Girls aren’t allowed in the men’s restroom. Get out.” Hongjoong scoffed. “I’m a man too, can I just pee and then I’ll leave?” A violent tug on the stall popped the lock, a taller man stood in the door way now. “I said, girls aren’t allowed in here. I heard your conversation, you’re pregnant. So that means you’re a woman right Hongjoong ah~” his blood turned to ice, fear crawling up his spine. “I’m…I’m a man, men can be pregnant. Not all men have a penis-“ a hand tugged on his hair, pulling him out of the stall and to the floor. “You’re no man Kim Hongjoong, KQ had no right debuting a tranny! You should be in a girl group!” A harsh kick was done to his back, causing the smaller to vomit from the force. “Leave me alone…I’ll get out…just stop.” Hongjoong tried to crawl away, only to have his ankle stepped on. A scream left his mouth, he could feel the bone crack, hear it even. “Fucking listen to me Hongjoong-ah…I’ve been following you since Mixnine. And you don’t deserve to be on the brink of debut, so why don’t you get up, clean your face, and use the bathroom you belong in you freak.” The man kicked him once more before leaving; Hongjoong shivered on the floor, pulling out his phone he typed a message to Seonghwa,

🐿️: come to the men’s restroom, I need you.

He slowly got off the floor, shaking as he limped over to the sink to wash the vomit off his face and hair. It didn’t take long for Seonghwa to come rushing in with a worried look, “what happened!? Are you okay!? Is the baby okay?” Seonghwa’s hand immediately going to his stomach made Hongjoong melt, already thinking about how protective Seonghwa would be during the pregnancy. “Some asshole came in and kicked me…told me I was a girl so I should use the girls bathrooms….I thought I’d escape this after high school. I guess not.” Tears fell down his face, dripping onto the sink beneath him, “just because I’m having a baby doesn’t make me a girl…tons of trans men have babies.” Seonghwa comforted his boyfriend by tugging him into his arms, rubbing his back gently. “Hey, don’t worry about assholes like that. Do you still need to go?” Hongjoong nodded, “I just needed to pee it takes five seconds.” , “go. I’ll keep watch:” Hongjoong wiped his tears and nodded, kissing his boyfriend quickly before entering the stall again, Seonghwa keeping his promise and guarding it the whole time.

Coming out of the restroom Seonghwa’s mother looked worried, “Hongjoong ah, you were in the bathroom for a long time are you okay?” Hongjoong nodded, not wanting to scare his eomma. “Yeah I’m okay, shy bladder.” She seemed to have bought the excuse. “Alright, let’s get you boys home.” The drive home was quiet; Hongjoong’s body starting to feel the pain making him groan, which he excused as muscle pain from dance practice. The boys thanked Seonghwa’s mother for dinner then headed into the apartment; where Seonghwa quickly pulled his boyfriend into a kiss, “let me check your injuries okay? See how bad they are.” , “they aren’t bad, just bruises and maybe a sprained ankle. We can get it looked at tomorrow. I want to forget what happened in the bathroom.” His hands ran up his boyfriend’s chest, “then I’ll help you forget.” The two shared a heated kiss as they stumbled into their bedroom, locking the door behind them.

•

•

•

Seonghwa woke up first the next morning; admiring the sight of Hongjoong naked beside him, blanket wrapped around his chest to hide what was underneath. Leaning down to press a kiss to his lovers forehead he slipped out of bed and pulled on his boxers and tank top, he’d just make breakfast in bed for the both of them. Grabbing his phone he decided to check his notifications as he walked into the kitchen; nothing too out of the ordinary, the members complaining about the naughty noises they’d heard, a good morning text from their manager in the group chat, an unknown number texting him…unknown number??

Tapping the notification Seonghwa had assumed it was just a spam text, oh how wrong he was;

📰: Trainee Kim Hongjoong of KQ Entertainment is transgender? And expecting his first child with fellow KQ Trainee park Seonghwa?

His blood froze. Ice flowing through his veins. “Oh fuck-“ he let out a shaky breath, the sound of a door being thrown open and frantic footsteps were what made him turn around, “Seonghwa-hyung! This is bad!” Wooyoung was only in his boxers when he shoved his phone in Seonghwa’s face.

📰: KQ trainees expecting child? Openly lgbt member is none other than Kim Hongjoong? Former Mixnine contestant?

“This is bad! Is Hongjoong awake!? He’s gonna flip. You remember what happened last time he was outed.” Seonghwa did remember, very well in fact. The boy had stopped eating and didn’t talk to anyone for weeks. Now there was a baby involved; his baby, and he wasn’t going to let anything happen to his child. “No he hasn’t, go sneak his phone off the nightstand, when he ask where it is tell him it broke. I have a spare he can have.” Seonghwa walked over to the closet they kept their extra junk, pulling out a small white Apple box containing an IPhone 8 he’d been given by an atiny despite already having the iPhone X himself. “We gotta keep him from knowing until we know how this got leaked. And put a shirt on!” Wooyoung sheepishly nodded as he ran off, attending to what Seonghwa had asked.

Hongjoong would believe his phone stopped working; he wouldn’t believe they weren’t hiding something from him, but he’d have to assume the other members didn’t get the same news articles. And if they did…who was the one who sent them?

[tricornonthecob]

Alas, it is now become daylight

LK 113: Turtles All The Way Down

(pt1)(pt2)(pt3)(pt4)(pt5)

Lol are you ready for why this is the most episode ever

I just.

To have been a fly on the wall in the recording studio that day. To have been a fly on the wall in the writing room!

"Lol this guy was nicknamed Black Dick. We have GOT to put that in there."

"Well you know, dick wasn't slang for penis until much later -"

"Which means we can fuck with the actors even more and get away with it on public television."

"..."

"..."

"Lets do it."

Fucking. Legends. I hope they bought Sarah and Henri's voice talents a drink after that lol. How many takes did it take???

Damn look at the ass on that boat. An entire convention center.

*vague hand gesturing* something something edutainment.

Rude. And a little bit racist?

Although to be fair, there are still mountain lions in the Appalachias at this time frame while British people had already extirpated all the large predators on their little Island home sooooooooo they're probably inordinately terrified of getting eaten by a large feline. If I were to give them the benefit of the doubt. But its probably racism.

...Okay but you do see its that attitude that landed y'all in this situation in the first place, yeah?

...oh my god is Lord Admiral Howe part of the Frillips polycule, please tell me he is.

Well, no, they're trespassing in populated woods and claiming squatter's rights on a bunch of different already-existing nations' orchards and game preserves and acting like its somehow God's providence that the wilderness is so ding dang bountiful when its actually really clever and aesthetically pleasing land management, but go on, I guess.

To be fair. Who the fuck reads in the dark. It is kinda sus.

Lord Admiral Howe's got dad jokes.

Y'all. Honeys. There is a better way of telling the truth.

That's it, mention his ex! The man still pines.

He's getting so misty-eyed! He misses the days of carefree orgies with the Frillips polycule.

.... no I think he's boned his way through most of Europe at this point.

He's also a little jealous and gets heated at the mention of Howe's exes.

FUCK I kind of get why Sarah gets so upset in this episode, I would not want to get into this kind of 18th Century Legal Trouble, either.

Why is it the eight-year-old ten-year-old human trafficking fugitive has a better grasp of the consequences than the fourteen-year-old sixteen-year-old homeless orphan?

Friends with the press? He's topped the press.

wow I never thought Agent Henri would be the one to slip up

[1-lightofjustice]

Reading hundreds notes about how romantic this line is made me wanna laugh because Danny P. Jackson translation is one of the most straightest version of Epic of Gilgamesh. Like man he poured genuine efforts on no-homoing it. For example Jackson's translation on Gilgamesh's dream is soo hetero-ly hilarious

Gil : mom a star came to me.. it kinda trapped me? I am worried but I embrace it like a man to woman he loves (I guess no amount of straightwashing can do anything to that original Epic sentence)

Ninsun : The star is your friend.. yes you will drawn to him like a spouse. but don't worry he will be far to you like star-earth distant no-homo distant (what in the Enlil is this character assassination for my ally mom)

Gil : mom I am scared I dreamed someone with axe attacked me and Uruk (HOWW?? WHYY??)

Ninsun : don't be afraid you will get a reliable brother that will guard you (no that axe-man IS "brother" Enkidu and "scared" is not what Gilgamesh's felt toward the axe-man in his dream Gil said 'hababu' from 'habibi' ffs)

Geez, reminds me that some scholar describe Gilgamesh's dream about Enkidu as "nightmare" (do men called their wet dream 'nightmare' now?)

Then The Lament of Enkidu, pour one shot for every mention of Enkidu's female lovers that Jackson added out of nowhere on Gilgamesh's speech (I tolerate first girlfriend for Shamhat but others are baseless wtf). Don't forget “one brother covered the set face of another with a bride-white veil”. Yes the bride line becomes just a color description for their brotherly activity.

Tablet 12 is "skin and bones" instead of "penis and crotch" (I guess penis is one kind of 'bones' and crotch is one kind of 'skin')

I guess the moral lesson is that no amount of straightwashing can prevent Gilgamesh and Enkidu from being fruity as hell.

“Hold my hand in yours, and we will not fear what hands like ours can do.”

— The Epic of Gilgamesh (Danny P. Jackson translation)

[theorist-influencer-untitled]

5.13.25 Tuesday

12:28 am

Still, have windblow...

I wanna have my own life... This Aunt Teresa is crazy for telling me that probably someone will punch me just to steal John... I said, huh? Who will do that here??? Then, I ask a gun from Aunt Karen....But I said no one will do that here... Lately, John & I went out at night to do his business coz nana is in the living room now...

I don't like a man who can't accept me, I know Kuya Jasper Cantimbuhan can accept my craziness on dogs... I want an upper mind but manly or sporty who loves dogs but able to do his vanity as well...

I want my man clean on his penis though we will have so many expensive dogs... I need someone sporty... I want him to have clean feet and teeth as always...

Hmm... I can't be with a man who can't accept dogs... Where can I get the bf who looks like Barbie like for example Kuya Jasper Cantimbuhan but sporty, manly, yummy and supportive....

I also need my vanities... My ways are really are for middle-class and upperish, sporty or love dogs but still loving and maintaining vanities...

10:30 am

Still, have windblow...

Aunt Teresa with Uncle Jun & Bethsilogs will get the bones of my grandfather to put with my nana...

Maco & Allen let them borrowed the car...

Me & John will be in-charge to take care of nana...

Hmm... I feel fat on my tummy part that I need to drink laxative tea.... Maybe, later...

10:42 am

Still, have windblow...

John is still sleeping in my room and I guess it is colder there...

I wonder who reversed the bathroom curtain and this fakers Uncle Jun is wearing white for straight 2 days....

We love you nana...

Your children...

From left to your right: Uncle DD, Bethsilogs, Nana, Aunt Teresa and Uncle Jun...

Aunt Teresa said I'll be using the room of RV for awhile... He will talk to RV... I will leave if I have a job coz I really wanna leave to have my own life on the upper if some good things will be coming my way, in a lil while...

I need to get a job...

Me and John wanted to join dog show angels... I wanna do my bleaching again on my buttish and inguinal. I need to get a job... Wishing to afford lasers and laser lipo and gyms... Ending-up with with a manly but with upper minds... Balance of lifestyle...

11:27 am

Still, have windblow...

This is a wealthy wifey of someone... They owned a house just like a manor but with full of trees and she became the host of this "animal watch"...

She also has human child... They are wealthy!!!

She got so many wolves... But capable to own a wolf to wear her gloves and maintain vanities... Lucky life!!!

11:45 am

Still, have windblow...

This crazy Uncle Jun is shouting to me again to get the 300 pesoses in baranggay for voting... But Chian said why she didn't know it?

Bethsilogs called me in the messenger then that Uncle Jun is shouting that I'm " potang inah" why, I don't want to get the 300 in baranggay... it is not that I don't want, Chian said it is not real! It is hot right now, it is noon time now... The sun shines brightly...

12:25 noon

Still, have windblow...

I got the 300 already, I said I thought it is 1k pesoses...

Thanks to George but I hope we can make it a thousands!!!

I gave Kokoy a 50 pesoses... We had an argument before I go to baranggay coz I asked him to stay in the living room coz I will get the money that I deserve coz I voted yesterday!!!

Crysette told me awhile ago that we need to get the prize money coz we practice the responsibility to vote as citizen of this country! Then, she said let Kokoy stay in the living room for awhile...

I said Kokoy come here in the living room coz I will go to baranggay to get the money that I deserve!!!

I truly deserve this money, this is not free money! This is a prize for voting as a responsible citizen of the Philippines!!!!

Then, this Kokoy came in the living room I said stay here for awhile, I will go to baranggay. I will just brush my teeth then I went to the bathroom then Kokoy murmured a words said " Sushi nang inah mo"!!! I said Hey!!! Are you talking to me? What did you say??? Kokoy said no older sister I'm talking to a friend. Then, I went to him to check his friend. Where is your friend? Kokoy said Outside and gone! I said Kokoy are you sure!? I hate plastics here... You know that we had yaya before here, we were not bad souls here Kokoy... Kokoy said it is not you older sister, I said that to my friend outside.

Then, I called Crysette and said wait I will just apply a sunblock then we went to baranggay... Crysette got the 900 pesoses for her, Uncle DD and Aunt Karen...

Then, I got the 3 , 100 pesoses and I asked Crysette that I will exchange my 100 to her 2,50 pesoses.... Then, I gave Kokoy a 50 pesoses...

1:53 pm

Still, have windblow...

I feel that I'm so fat hahaha....Getting a job is main priority after this..... Getting a bf who is pretty, can speak English, rich and supportive like Kuya Jasper Cantimbuhan ....

What else? I need a "Dr. Alvin Set" to do skin peeling for my face... Hope I can afford Netflix again... So, cheap my life these days...

Good thing! I'm able to access my gcash again...

2:27 pm

Still, have windblow...

I'm checking live stream for me to be active again, hoping to get a job... I need to earn... I need money angels for Starbucks, vanities and John!

For some expenses as well...

6:48 pm

Still, have windblow...

Thanks, for the prize that I got as Filipino...

These are the 250 pesoses... Happy in a way but thankful!!!

6:54 pm

Still, have windblow...

Still, wishing I could buy "Dr.Alvin's Rejuvenating" for 300 pesoses...

I hope I could make a comeback on derma shop...

8:20 pm

Still, have windblow...

Missing card! My Hello Kitty Cards are missing!!! It is for wish and spells...

I put it inside the table in the room here near nana ... I hate people or kids who are stealing stuff or getting stuff without permission...

9:13 pm

Still, have windblow...

I got it!!! It fell down on the side of the table...

These are for pure heart, the one can read cards having pure and religious heart...

These are for wishes as Solitaire as well...

[missfortunetherogue]

The Embrace of Love and Death, Chapter 7: A Friendly Rivalry Among Thieves

Chapter Summary: Miss Fortune flirts their way through the Emerald Grove to get information faster so they can soak up some sun, and everyone has thoughts on their methods. Miss Fortune also kicks off what will become a longstanding pickpocketing/stealing rivalry with Astarion when they give him a strange gift they pilfered from an unsuspecting druid.

Read from chapter 1 on AO3!

Excerpt:

“Will it make you uncomfortable if I take off my shirt?” Miss Fortune asked Shadowheart once they’d found the perfect spot to lounge.

“I’m not some virginal priestess of a sheltered goddess,” Shadowheart snickered, setting her mace down but within reach. “I’ve seen plenty of naked bodies before. Be my guest if you want to risk getting ambushed without protection.”

“I’ll take my chances,” they smirked, unbuckling their leathers. They chanced a look at Astarion to their left; he was already splayed out as if trancing. From the small upturn of his lips to his relaxed brow, he looked blissfully at peace. They couldn’t explain the compulsion but a mischievous voice told them now was the perfect time to reveal the gift they’d secured for him.

“Hey, Astarion,” they loomed over his face, blocking out the sun. He cracked an eye open in mild annoyance. “I’ve got something in my front pocket for you,” they purred.

“Not in front of poor Shadowheart, you little menace,” he scolded.

“Ha! It’s not my penis. It’s a penis, just not mine.”

“All right, color me intrigued. Show me.”

Shadowheart coughed pointedly. “I want to see, too!”

Miss Fortune reached dramatically into their pocket, pulling the trinket out painfully slow before closing it in their fist. They placed it gently, almost reverently into Astarion’s upturned palm. Sitting up to take a look, the vampire’s shoulders began to shake with laughter. It was a baculum bone about as long as his palm was wide, and it had been intricately carved and bejeweled with tiny emeralds.

“What in the bloody hells is this little beauty?!” Astarion laughed.

Shadowheart sat up and joined in the laughter. “That is something.”

“I am sure any guesses we could make would be correct ones,” Miss Fortune grinned. “I don’t know how many druids you’ve both encountered but every single one I’ve known has had some weird thing they wanted to show me with their dick.”

“Oh my gods, it’s too true!” Astarion gasped. “Wherever did you find this?” The vampire traced the carvings and fingered the jewels, a small glint of satisfaction glowing in his eyes.

“Remember that druid I helped out who was carrying crates stacked higher than his head?”

“Yes…?” Shadowheart said quizzically.

“I pulled a classic ‘let me help you with that.’ Few people are going to suspect such a helpful little fellow such as myself of picking their pockets. I’m a Good Samaritan, after all!”

“You’re as bad as the children here!” Shadowheart scoffed, clearly not impressed. The angel on their shoulder.

“No, I’m much worse. I don’t get caught,” Miss Fortune beamed.

“You’re brilliant, darling,” Astarion praised, the devil on their shoulder always tempting them into sinful thoughts. “Thank you for this…err, thoughtful gift. I shall treasure it always, I’m sure.”

“You can thank me by stealing something even better next time,” they challenged.

“Oh, you are on , you cheeky little pup. Now hush up and lie down, we’re losing precious sunlight.” And with that, the vampire tucked the baculum into his own pocket and went back to ignoring them.

As soon as Miss Fortune’s leathers and undershirt were off they eagerly laid down to join him and Shadowheart. It was everything they’d dreamed of and more. The lush grass was so densely clumped it made Miss Fortune feel as if they were hovering imperceptibly over the ground, lifted up by thousands of individual blades as they gently tickled their skin. And despite the sunny day, the turf was pleasantly cool to the touch, a lovely juxtaposition to the radiating warmth of the sun beaming down on their bare chest. As they watched the clouds amble by overhead, they wished they could stay here forever. There was something magical about doing nothing.

“You know, I’ve been meaning to apologize,” Shadowheart broke the silence after a spell. “About outing you the other day.”

Miss Fortune squinted over at her, raising a hand to shield their eyes from the sun. “Oh?”

“Truth be told, I was expecting you to be some kind of a fourth-born noble son who’d found themselves disgraced and disinherited by the family. I didn’t suspect you were a prostitute.”

Miss Fortune heard a snort to their left. “Well, it’s out now. I accept your apology. Gods how I wish I were just some spoiled, disgraced noble kid. Then again, maybe I don’t. I’ve bedded enough of them to know they’re a miserable lot always trying to weasel out of paying fairly. Not to mention terrible in bed - selfish lovers even by the standards of a typical patron.”

Shadowheart looked over at them, a wicked smile splitting her face. “I can only imagine you have enough dirt on half the noble families to sink Baldur’s Gate into a cesspool of scandal.”

“Oh my dear, it already is!” Astarion chimed in. “They just don’t speak openly about it.”

“He’s right. And so are you. In some ways, a tiny part of me can’t wait to get back there just to sow confusion. Mark my words, you’ll know when we run into a former customer of mine. I used to look…different. So they won’t know where they know me from, but they’ll have that confused glimmer of recognition.”

“Sounds like a fun little game,” the vampire said.

“It does,” Shadowheart agreed before her face turned pensive. “I wanted to reward your honesty, though. I know that I’ve been…evasive at best. But I think I can trust you with my truth now.”

“Should I leave?” Astarion asked, amusement playing in his tone. Miss Fortune’s hand shot out instinctively in his direction in a bid to keep him close; they stopped themselves moments before making contact and quickly slinked their arm back into their own personal space. They hoped it would look like more of an involuntary twitch than a deliberate action.

“I think you’ve earned the right to stay, Astarion, after coming clean about your vampirism,” Shadowheart smirked. “We’re all monsters in our own way so why not show you my monstrous self?”

“Excuse me?! I am a lover, not a monster!” Miss Fortune scoffed in mock indignation.

“You’re the worst out of all of us, then,” she quipped. “Love turns us all into monsters in the end. But anyway, I should just get it out there. I am a follower of Lady Shar, the Mistress of the Night. She is the goddess of darkness, loss, forgetfulness, and secrets.”

“I guess that explains the deep-seated hatred for Selûne you’ve expressed a few times,” Miss Fortune said thoughtfully.

“Is that all you have to say on the matter?”

“Should I have a different reaction?”

“Well it’s just…most people aren’t that accepting of followers of Shar. Many fear us.”

“I think you’ll find our dear leader has absolutely no sense of self-preservation,” Astarion added snidely. “Very little of what should alarm them actually does.”

He propped himself up on an elbow for dramatic effect. “Did you know this sweet fool, when they awoke to find my fangs a breath from their neck, simply said ‘ah yes, this makes sense’ and resigned themselves to die?” The vampire had softened his voice and raised it an octave in a decent imitation of their voice when he quoted them, adding to the absurdity of the story.

Shadowheart’s sharp laugh clanged around them like a cloud of daggers, soon joined by Astarion’s full-throated guffaws. Embarrassment lanced through Miss Fortune, hot and painful, but they tried to mask it with their own gentle chuckle. After all, with a little distance between that night and this moment it was a little funny. They turned over to Astarion and discreetly signed ‘what the hells?’

Between blasts of laughter he shot them a smoldering smile, taking one of their hands in his. He brushed his lips gently against their knuckles before dragging his fangs over them for just a moment. Miss Fortune’s traitorous body let out an involuntary shiver and, seemingly pleased with their reaction, the vampire released them before Shadowheart noticed.

“You did not,” Shadowheart said incredulously once her mirth died down.

“I may have,” Miss Fortune admitted.

“How could you have such little regard for your life? We’re all counting on you!”

“That’s what I said!” Astarion boasted boldly. “We still need to have that little chat, you know, darling.”

“I know,” they conceded. “But anyway we weren’t supposed to be talking about me! Thank you for telling us, Shadowheart. It changes nothing, I’m still glad to call you a friend, regardless of who you—did you hear that?”

Off to the right a ways from where Shadowheart lay they heard the rustling of plant life and a heavy footfall. Miss Fortune scrambled up to a crouch, Astarion mirroring their stance a split moment behind them. Shadowheart was the last one on her feet, steadying her stance just as a scarred bugbear rounded the corner with an axe held high.

“Put your damned armor on, darling!” Astarion shouted, his eyes wide and frantic. He began to run towards their opponent, seemingly forgetting all their training. They were supposed to coordinate.

“No time, I’ll be careful,” Miss Fortune promised. Except they weren’t careful. Or at least, they weren’t careful enough.

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[dwarfysays]

3/31/25, Monday

C vented via text about how exhausting it is to do our dad’s personal hygeine, now with a foley catheter and all the maintenance that comes with it.

*sigh heavily*

I suppose she demands that the rest of us take up that work for her. It’s hard work. The evening routine is oral care of swabbing his mouth including his remaining teeth, washing his face, changing the foley bag from the daytime to the higher volume night time bag, cleaning his penis/perineal area, emptying and cleaning out the daytime urine bag.

Don’t get me wrong! I’m so grateful that C is doing this. Especially since it is something that is so dirty, difficult, and so awkward as those are the big hurdles for me.

C was getting around to demanding we do this hard awful work too. I will say it. I don’t want to do that hard filthy work of caring for a man that hardly played a role in raising me. Guess he realized late in life that he was going to need somebody to take care of him, so he did everything he could already in his 60s to help with the grand children. Just trying to insure he has an army of people willing to take up the task of keeping him alive.

And thus our kids are used to do all this. They have been alternating with us sibs in Dad’s care. On top of that, all the grandkids are made well aware of who is going out of their way to care for this largely incompetent, ignorant, selfish man.

I think back to my childhood when he would be mostly deployed out to sea. When at home he fucks Mom, sits around watching TV and runs away in his car when things got tough in the household.

That’s who we are providing the best of care to right now. He also expects his kids to take great care of him and help him live as long as possible. I don’t know how much longer he can last with dementia, bad kidneys, heart disease, diabetes, COPD and stage 4 prostate cancer that spread to his bones and chest lymph nodes. I admit he would not be here today had he been in a nursing home.

Dad never had to care for his parents. They were conveniently far away with the other relatives to care for them until their passing.

Dad told C that is it the youngest daughter’s responsibility to care for the parents. I tried to look that up, but couldn’t find anything. Maybe that’s the case in their remote part of the world they had immigrated from.

There are parents that were abusive towards their kids and when they get old, fall at the mercy of those very people. I wonder how they faired.

I suppose one can’t blame C for being frustrated being the only one to wash our dad’s dick and ass and foley bags.

I admit I don’t want to do that shit. I’m willing to hire somebody to do that for me. But alas, dad is still cognizant enough to refuse nursing care from outside the family.

I’m angry and frustrated too. C demands we clean dad’s dick and ass too. That was the point of her venting in the first place. Did she expect one of us to raise a hand and volunteer? Well, she got disappointed because nobody really wants to do that filthy job.

N offered a sibs only night out our treat. C gladly accepted and added that we should bathe and perform dad’s night time routine 2 or more times a week.

Being honest, I don’t want to and feel really awful about having to do it.

It is hard. It is incredibly hard and thankless filthy job.