#no music i make ever turns out how i want it to but what can you do

[makaylaloves-words]

Jason Todd thought his need for touch had died with him.

Part two!!

here’s part one

Pairing: Jason Todd x afab reader

TW: Loss of virginity (male), nsfw, pinv, religious imagery, body issues mentioned.

1.7k words

The sun comes dreadfully early. Bright butter yellow beams forcing Jason away from the oasis that is your embrace. You kiss his forehead then head to get ready for work. You start your usual routine, unaware of his recurring thoughts. Usually, he will wake up a little slower then go to make breakfast while you get ready. Today he lingers like the last bits of snow as winter fades into spring.

He watches you come out of the bathroom after your shower, music still playing from your phone. Music he will never admit to liking but listens to when he misses you. Your perfect skin slightly damp as you put on that lotion that makes him want to take a bite out of you.

Clad in only your underwear and bra, hair up in a towel, you pick your outfit for work and start on your makeup. Humming and dancing to your music. He stands.

He’s silent as he approaches, a huge sleepy figure looming behind you.

“Hi” you chirp, rubbing lotion into your skin.

“I want to have sex with you.”

You slowly turn, eyes wide. “Well good morning to you, too.” he swallows but doesn’t back down.

“I kinda have work” you blink.

“I- I didn’t mean right now. Just soon.” he says and your heart picks up. “Okay, honey, soon.”

You step closer and lift on your toes to peck his cheek. You let your hand linger on his bare chest, his hips against you in a way you can feel as hard he is. It gets you drunk on power to know how little it takes for you to do that to him.

Four nights later, it’s the usual routine but something’s off. He goes out on patrol for a few hours and you get finish up some work and make dinner. You eat together then he showers while you wind down. You’ve been dating over a year so naturally you’ve seen eachother naked but he’s always been a little secretive about his body. That’s why you’re very surprised when he walks into your bedroom in just his towel around his waist. Raven hair still damp and water droplets clinging to the scared tissue of his muscled chest. As anyone would eyes would, you give him a good stare down. He looks.. nervous.

“Something wrong?” you finally say.

“Now.” he says

“Now.. what?” your head tilts

He looks away, swallowing in embarrassment.

“I want to have sex.”

Oh.

Oh.

“I- uh right now?” you nearly laugh. You have been on a dry spell ever since you started dating Jason so honestly just him shirtless has got you hot and bothered but he doesn’t need to know that.

“I’ve made you wait this long” he nods and steps towards the bed. you stand, arms looping around his neck like a perfect ribbon. “You’ll help me know what to do?” he whispers and you smile “of course.”

Turns out you really have to tell him what to do. You don’t know if you pity the guy or are proud because he’s clearly never watched porn or anything of the sort.

“Just kiss me firs-” you instruct and before you can finish the words his lips are on yours. He’s grown a lot in his kissing ability. From small pecks on your forehead to now as he tangles his tongue with yours. Jason hooks his arms under your thighs and lifts you with practiced ease. Your legs wrap around his hips and his hands hesitantly inch towards the back of your thighs. You nod against as your mouth works on his and his hands slide to grip your ass, holding you to him. He groans.

The towel is slipping off his hips and you can feel an anticipation that you haven’t felt in so long coursing through you, straight to your gut.

“Are you sure about this? You can change your mind.” you say, pulling back. your chest is heaving and you know his answer as he licks a stripe up your neck.

He slowly steps forward, setting you on the bed and looking at you like you’re a goddess who just offered him immortality. “Do i sit down or-“ he bites his lip and you giggle. “We can just do missionary.” he blinks in confusion. “i’ll lay down” you add, stripping your shorts and scooting back on the bed.

You strip your shirt and look up. He’s staring at you in a way you’ve seen very few times. He’s flushed, pupils dilated and hands gripping the towel on his hips so hard his knuckles are white. “Um you come over here now” you swallow as he drops the towel and crawl towards you.

For a long time, Jason thought he was disgusting. A foul ugly creature who rose from the dead and doesn’t deserve a single thing he has. You, however, have never understood this. He is beautiful. Greek god level. You can feel the arousal on your thighs as you bite your lip.

He leans down and kisses you again, hard length pressed against your bare stomach as you start taking off the rest of your clothes.

It’s a charming process in the way that it’s kinda clumsy. You haven’t done this in a while and well Jason’s literally a virgin so it takes you a couple tries to get your bra and underwear off.

He breaks the kiss to look down at you. Eyes trialing over your breast as he rests his hands on your ribcage. “You are beautiful” he whispers and you smile shyly. “You too” he blushes.

Both naked as the day you were born, he gulps “So do i just-“

“pretty much”

He gives himself a few strokes, dark lashes fluttering before he leans to you and presses against you. An inch in and he bites his lips. “God” he whines and you smile. he’s larger than most and you revel in the stretch as he pushes more.

“Oh i understand now” he mutters, hands fisting the sheets by your head.

“Understand what?” you say with a small whimper.

“Why people enjoy this so much” he cuts his words off with a moan as he pushes in a bit more.

With a final gasp from him, he’s all the way in and he swears he’s in heaven. He’s never been a very religious person but if there is a god then it is you and this fucking pussy. He groans, hands gripping the sheets beside your head as your hands delicately grasp his wrists.

“You can move” you say quietly, eyes loving as you look up at him.

“I-“ he should move. he knows he should but he is already close to coming and he doesn’t wanna come that fast. You’re just so warm and wet and tight and- oh no.

no no no.

you shift your hips, forcing his dick to rock in and out of you. It barely even moves. “Fuck, no—sto—"

Jason grunts. Chokes on it. 

you do it again, just the softest roll of your hips. “Baby, you don’t understand” he groans, arms shaking beside your head. “It’s okay” you coo, “it’s normal just- please” he swallows. yes he didn’t want to be the guy who blew it like a two pump chump but it’s true he wanted you to feel good to. god, he wants that more than his own pleasure. So, he moves.

A small thrust, just the last 2 inches coming out and in but he whines and turns his head away. You smile, “Hey. look at me, pretty boy”. he groans and looks down at you. god you look like a fucking angel.

He’s nearly drooling as he shudders and thrusts a few more times. Then he stops, “What are you doing?” he gulps.

You blink up at him. It’s true your hand had snaked down and drew a few circles around your clit but that was not a crime.

“I-“

“Show me how.”

“What?”

“That thing you’re doing. Feels good? Show. me. how.” Jason’s words would sound like a demand if he wasn’t bright red and pussy drunk. And instead of getting all butt hurt, he’s asking you to teach him and-

—and oh, isn’t your heart melting into a puddle.

You gently take one of his hands off the sheets next to him and guide his thick calloused fingers to your clit. “Just- circles or press a little.” you say, words cutting out with a moan when he rubs your clit. good to know he was a fucking natural. His eyes are glued to where his cock is pressed into you and he gulps before continuing his ministrations on your clit. Then he thrusts at the same time. You both moan in sync and he smiles, “‘m doing good? I’m not gonna last much longer, baby.”

You nod, simply letting him now it’s okay. A few more thrusts and he is shaking. Eyes closing as he gulps.

“Can i-.. in you?” he mutters.

“Yes.” you say calmly, chest heaving.

He buries his face in the warm crook of your neck, a bright flush over his scared skin. Then he’s coming and- “I love you” he groans and you pause.

“what?”

he’s only half conscious as he spurts into you. eyes rolling back as he gasps. “i’m sorry i didn’t tell you sooner. I’m in love with you, have been for a while.”

you blink “i love you too, Jay.”

He keeps his head buried in your neck but he slowly trails some kisses along your jaw in response. His hand speeds up on your clit as he keeps pumping his slowly softening cock. After a few moments he sits back up, eyes hazy, “you haven’t- should i try again?” you laugh.

“Just give me a minute, love.” your hand snakes down and you lay your fingers on his, helping his finger your clit in that way that had you sparking. You tighten around him and he swears he’s seeing stars. “Fuck” he pulls out of you, grunts turning into a self satisfied smile when you come. You aren’t super loud or anything but he swears it’s the most beautiful melodic thing he has ever seen.

When you come down from your high, he’s laying half on top of you. You can feel his heartbeat thunder against yours, as if merging together—erratic and unsteady. “You did so good” you kiss the top of his head. “You too” he teases.

you have officially deflowered the great jason todd.

thank you for all the support! this is my first time really writing and i’m having a very fun time. i’m kinda new to tumbler so let me know if i’m doing this tag list wrong, lol.

@theendofthematerialgworl @nwjsns @anamiranda7383 @vicky342 @jayskookies @cyberangel-graphics

[wlwsoccerfics]

Building a Home(GraceClintonXTooneReader)

Warnings: sprained ankle.

Summary: you and Grace are working on making the House you brought a Home.

You currently stood in the livingroom, putting in new flooring. Yes you did it yourself cause you were quite Handy when it came to building stuff.

"Babe? Are you sure you don't need help?" Grace asked you from the doorway. Your older sister Ella standing next to her. She was texting Alessia. Her best friend and your England teammate.

"No i got it Love!" You told her, giving her a thumbs up.

"that's very attractive! How you build everything and repair it!" Grace let you know.

"keep it in your Pants, Girls." Your sister said, you flipped her off.

"Love you too, Ella!" You just replied and chuckled softly.

"for real, tooney your sister is really talented. can't believe she did basically everything around the house herself!" Grace answered.

"you are so in love. It's cute!" Ella spoke up.

"both of us happily in love! Good for us!" You told your sister and she nodded her head in agreement.

"true!" She said.

Grace watched you, smiling.

"can't believe i get to marry you soon!" Your fiancee admitted.

"better believe it! I don't just fix stuff for everyone! Just Family, Close Friends and the love of my Life!" You told Grace.

"okay tune it down a bit! That's a bit much. Even for me!" Ella stated and you chuckled softly.

"you are at our place! So stop complaining. You can just leave, you know!" You let your sister know, teasing her.

"but it's lonely at home. My other half isn't there!" She said.

"we know. You keep telling all of us! You even complained to Lessi about it multiple times!" Your fiancee told your sister. Your sister decided to ignore what was just being said.

"also it wouldn't make sense for me to leave and go home cause the three of us have practice in like an hour." Ella answered.

"let me just finish the last few pieces i have already cut out and then i will get ready for practice so we can drive to the training grounds!" You told both Ella and Grace. Turning your snapback around on your head so it was backwards before going back to work.

Grace and Ella went to the kitchen.

"i can't believe my sister build this. It's a career path in case she ever doesn't want to Play football anymore!" Your sister said. Grace was really proud of you.

" it's perfect. She enjoys to build and to repair and i love to decorate! Works out perfectly!" Your fiancee stated.

"it does indeed." Ella answered. The two discussed the kitchen Layout a little more before you showed up in the doorway ten minutes later.

"i will get ready now so i can drive us to practice." You announced, walking over to Grace to give her a quick kiss on the cheek. You then walked upstairs.

You quickly got dressed for practice. Grace and Ella were already dressed for a while. They grabbed their bags when you came back downstairs and walked to your Car. You locked the Front door of your Home and got into the drivers seat of your Car. Ella in the backseat and Grace was being your passenger princess like most of the time.

You were listening to Reneé Rapp. Cause you really loved her music and you had the rule that the driver could choose the music.

When you arrived at the training grounds your parked the Car and the three of you walked inside. Running into your captain Maya and Leah on the way in.

"hey Love Birds, Hey Ella!" Maya said, smiling at the three of you.

"hey you!" You replied.

"how is the House renovation coming along?" Leah asked.

"it's going great! Y/n is quite fast." Grace told them.

"my sister has Talent, i must admit!" Ella stated.

"probably hurt your Ego to say this!" You said teasingly. She playfully shoved you.

"hey Tooney, don't hurt my future wife!" Grace told your sister.

"If you need help let me know!" Maya offered.

"i am happy to help as well!" Leah let you know.

"i will keep that in mind! Thanks for the offer!" You replied.

You got changed into your Football cleats before walking out to the trainings pitch with the others. Holding hands with Grace. You two didn't mind the teasing you received from your teammates.

Practice was going well until Grace slipped and clutched her ankle. You kneeled down in front of her.

"baby, don't try and stand up." You told her, examing her ankle. Your sister informing the medics to come over and Check on you.

"it doesn't Hurt so bad!" She told you. You sighed softly.

"Babe it looks sprained. Better safe then sorry! Let the medics check you over, please!" You said.

"okay..." She replied, holding her ankle. The medics took her inside to exam her ankle. You followed them.

Grace indeed had a sprained ankle and got a walking boot for the next two weeks just to be sure. You made sure to take care of her and let her rest while also finishing up the livingroom renovations.

Oh and not to forget that you two were planning your Wedding.

[sunsbaby]

❝ de. i think i'm stuck... ❞

❝ sam will you help me! gosh... ❞

⋆ dean w. & sam w. x photographer .ᐟ reader

ever since you began hunting with the boys, their life went in a new direction. they found themselves appreciating the little things a bit more—such as taking photos, just on their phones and not a huge camera. sam had taken more of an interest than dean, following you around and secretly 'learning' from you. dean, however, he didn't care for it, but somehow he always took the best photos. albeit some are rather embarrassing, like you with pie all over your face, but they were fond memories and a way for him to relive the moment again.

"biride, hurry up. we don't have all day." dean groaned, his head falling back as he dramatically rolled his eyes.

sam stood on the side-lines, too busy in whatever lore he was reading to focus on the important matter at hand—important in your words. there was a beautiful bird high up in a tree, one that you had to climb in order to get close enough; that's how you ended up perched on a branch, camera held tightly in your grasp as you shot a look down towards dean.

"de, do not distract me or so help me god i will break this camera on your head!" you threatened in a hushed whisper as to not scare away the creature in front of you. "and you will buy me a new one."

"yea right, birdie. you won't do anything, and i'm not buying you anything." dean teased, sam let out a sigh—he gave dean 'the look.'

somehow sam thought this was the perfect moment to take a picture of, their birdie trying to take a photo of a bird. he let out a chuckle as his finger pressed the button on his phone, a snapping sound echoed through the trees when you both clicked a button at the same time. the bird flew away, but you were successful. celebrating your victory with a little dance—to which dean face-palmed at.

when you attempted to get down, you realized something was off. you quite literally could not climb down. your lips pursed and you tried to come up with a plan inside your head—which was filled with song lyrics and what else you could take a picture of. not helpful, so you resorted to your only other option. sam and dean!

"de. i think i'm stuck..." your voice was almost quiet, which dean took as an opening to tease you.

"huh? what was that birdie? i can't hear your chirping from down here." he said, that dumb grin etched onto his face—a face you couldn't wait to smack.

"sam, will you help me!" you almost yelled as a pout formed on your glossy lips—no dry lips around here! "gosh..."

⋆⭒˚.⋆

after that stressful part of the day, you settled into the backseat of baby while the boys sat in the front. people might think that you're being forced to sit in the back—no, it's actually the opposite. who wants to sit between two men, especially ones who spread their legs like they're the only ones sitting there. at least in the back you can lay down, and not think about the sexual activities that have gone down. it makes for a great way to take pictures of them with out their knowledge.

"can we stop at a gas station, i want snacks." you asked as you poked your head into the front, turning up the music in the process.

"i could go for some too." sam joked, his eyes focusing in on yours.

a soft smile played at his lips—he couldn't imagine life without you. you'd just walst into it and changed them for the better. no matter how far you went, your wings always brought you back.

"i guess, birdie..." dean grumbled, he knew good and well that he couldn't say no to you. neither could sam. "shut up, bitch." dean joked with sam, a genuine smile forming on deans stubbled face.

"jerk."

the sun faded in the background as you sang out into the sky, the wind tangling in your hair. another day spent with your boys and memories made. that was what a good day is to you.

sunny yaps! HIII EVERYONEE! 👯‍♀�� photographer!readers first little story/drabble! i hope you guys like her and pls share your thoughts and opinions! I LOVE HEARING THEM!

special tags! @bluemerakis @figthoughts @dulcescorderitas @sunsettsam @h8aaz @deansbeer

𝐒𝐔𝐍𝐒𝐁𝐀𝐁𝐘 ® 𓂃 do not repost or copy my works without permission!!

[nthewriter]

(Sorry I had writer block ;-; please be advised this chapter can be uncomfortable to read, it's angsty)

Being Simon's long lost biological child

part 1 / part 2 / part 3 / part 4 / part 5 (you are here!)

"Did you seriously search "how to be a good dad"?" Johnny asked with an arched eyebrow, looking at the computer.

"Better late than nothing."

"Si, honey, I think that's more of an instinct thingy."

"My only instincts are to kill and to protect." Simon groaned, head back in annoyance. "I am really trying, Johnny."

"I know." He felt the other man's hands on his shoulders massaging him. "It's been a few weeks now. We could... have a family lunch? Could cook something, and they often eat alone in their room."

"You're an angel. You know that?"

Simon genuinely tried to be a good father. It was just... hard. Too hard sometimes. He drove (Y/N) to their therapy sessions twice a week, waited for them, tried to remember things they liked to which they would reply "I am not five anymore dad!". Well, at least they recognised him as their father. Which was good, he guessed.

Johnny had always been a good cook, that’s what he had found out after starting to live with the Scottish man. He always had cookbooks everywhere, freshly and neatly aligned by categories. Ever since he had been lightly discharged from the army, Johnny has been trying out all kinds of cooking, even once cooking something with dry insects. Simon still remembered trying to smile and to tell his beloved he was liking it.

Simon dressed up the table nicely. He wanted to make sure that (Y/N) felt included, welcomed… loved. He did feel like an asshole for not trying to step up earlier. It would have avoided all this mess. It would have surely prevented Elsie's death. It would have prevented his child from being turned into a mindless killer who worshiped Vladimir Makarov like a saint.

They came out the bedroom, footsteps light but Simon could hear them coming down the stairs. When he looked up, he found his child staring back at him with a frown.

“What's the occasion?”

“We thought we could have a family dinner tonight. You, me, Soap.” He jerked with his head toward the kitchen. Simon usually used his partner's callsign as a pet name.

“I'm not hungry.”

“You better be. He spent the whole afternoon in the kitchen trying to find something that will please you.” There he went with his aggressive and harsh tone. He tried to calm and ground himself. “Listen- I just- Johnny just wanted to spend some time with you.”

“So we can pretend everything is okay? That we are a perfect little family?” (Y/N) replied, mimicking his aggressive tone.

“Yes. Just for once. Please.” Simon begged as he moved and awkwardly clasped their shoulder. He squeezed it lightly.

“Fine.”

The evening went on quietly. Simon put on some light music, trying to make the atmosphere less tense. He had cleaned up a little, trying to look good. His eyes wandered to his child who took a few bites off the food Johnny had prepared.

“It's good?” Johnny asked the kid.

“Yeah.”

They often spoke few words when they were around the couple. Simon felt bad, he wanted to include them into the family. So he tried to make conversation.

“Doctor Fonda said you were making a lot of efforts. That's nice. I am proud of you.”

“Proud of what? Of me “seeing things your way”?” They spoke aggressively.

“No- I meant-”

“Meant what?” They glared at him across the table. And the man felt a white hot rage rising in his body. Couldn’t they see he was trying?! Trying to be a better father?!

“Simon, calm down.” Johnny put his hand on his partner's under the table.

“I'm calm.”

“Speak to yourself, old man. Sounds like you have seen a ghost or something.” They grinned, continuing to fuel his rage. “What? Do I look like mom? How did you feel when she died after you left her to rot all alone?”

“I didn't leave her! You're making me sound bad.” Simon growled, slowly standing up. And his kid stood too.

“Because you're trying to play the hero, again, when in reality you're just a freaking loser! She died because of you!”

“And you should have died with her! That will save me a bunch of problems!” Simon roared back. “I didn't want you in the first fucking place! I wish she had aborted you like I begged her in the first place.”

Then, silence. Complete silence. (Y/N) stomped back to their room, slamming the door. The dinner was cold. Simon sighed and put a hand through his hair. He had fucked up. Again. He had said things he didn't mean to say. Or perhaps… and it was the worst, he meant them.

Turning to Johnny, he tried to apologise. But the other man just groaned something under his breath, clearly annoyed at him.

“The dishes need to be done.” Johnny spoke with an emotionless voice as he grabbed the half empty plate.

Simon sat back into his chair. He wasn't a good father. But he was a good destroyer.

[minoouz]

Still yours ⛥ ‎ ── ‎ ( 이희승 )

Paring :: Jealous!ex!Heeseung x Reader

𝐈 . Genre :: angst???

𝐈𝐈 . Word count :: 988

𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆 :: Heeseung is possessive, Jake and sunoo featuring.

The party was already in full swing when you arrived, lights flashing across the room and music vibrating through the floor. You spotted Sunoo and Jake near the drinks table, deep in conversation, but before you could head over, Sunoo’s eyes lit up and he waved you over.

“There you are! We were starting to think you bailed.” Sunoo grinned, handing you a cup.

Jake elbowed him. “I told you she wouldn’t. You love parties too much.”

You rolled your eyes, taking a sip. “I almost did. You owe me for this.”

Sunoo pouted. “You love us too much to abandon us.”

He wasn’t wrong — these two had been your rocks ever since your breakup with Heeseung. They’d been there through the tears, the late-night rants, and the ridiculous ice cream-fueled movie marathons.

“I do,” you admitted with a small smile. “But that doesn’t mean you’re off the hook.”

Jake opened his mouth to retort, but then his expression shifted — his eyes flicked to something behind you, and his playful demeanor faded. “Heads up,” he muttered.

Your stomach sank. You didn’t have to turn around to know who it was. The air seemed to change when Heeseung walked into a room — you hated that you still noticed it.

“Do you want to leave?” Sunoo asked softly, his hand brushing your arm.

“No,” you said quickly, straightening. “I’m fine.”

But you weren’t fine. Not when Heeseung spotted you almost immediately, his eyes dark and unreadable as they met yours across the room. Not when he started making his way over, moving through the crowd with that same easy confidence you used to love.

“Hey,” he said, his voice warm and familiar. Too familiar.

You forced yourself to meet his gaze. “Hey.”

Heeseung’s eyes softened as they roamed over you. “You look… amazing.”

“Thanks.” You kept your tone cool, your fingers tightening around your cup.

“Can we talk?” He stepped closer, his voice dropping. “Please?”

Sunoo shifted beside you, and you could feel Jake’s eyes burning into Heeseung. They didn’t trust him — not after how things ended. And honestly? You weren’t sure you did either.

“There’s nothing to talk about,” you said, forcing a smile. “It’s over, remember?”

Heeseung’s jaw tightened. “You don’t mean that.”

“Don’t I?” You tilted your head, trying to ignore the way your heart was racing. “I think I’ve been pretty clear.”

For a second, you thought he might push. But then Heeseung’s expression shifted — that soft vulnerability you thought you saw hardened into something else.

“Alright,” he said, stepping back. “If that’s how you want it.”

And just like that, he walked away.

Jake let out a low whistle. “You okay?”

“Fine,” you said, even though the ache in your chest told a different story.

Sunoo nudged you. “You’re totally not fine.”

“I just need a drink.” You turned toward the kitchen, needing some space — and maybe something stronger than what you had.

But when you came back, the ache in your chest turned into something far more dangerous.

Because there Heeseung was, on the dance floor — and he wasn’t alone.

She was gorgeous. Laughing up at him, her hands on his shoulders, their bodies way too close. And when his eyes flicked toward you — just for a second — you knew exactly what he was doing.

“Unbelievable,” Sunoo muttered beside you. “He’s doing that on purpose.”

Jake’s hand found your shoulder. “You wanna leave? We can bail.”

But you didn’t want to leave. You didn’t want to run away. You wanted…

You didn’t know what you wanted. But your feet were already moving.

You didn’t stop until you were at the edge of the dance floor, and before you could second-guess yourself, you tapped Heeseung on the shoulder.

His eyes lit up when he saw you. “Jealous?” he murmured, that infuriating smirk playing at his lips.

“Not even a little,” you lied.

“Really?” He tilted his head, his voice low and teasing. “Then why are you here?”

You didn’t have an answer for that. But when his hand reached out, settling at your waist, you didn’t pull away.

“Careful,” Heeseung whispered as he pulled you closer. “You’re playing a dangerous game.”

“Maybe I like danger,” you shot back, your heart pounding in your chest.

And just like that, you were his again — whether you liked it or not.

A/n :: DONT JUDGE OR ASK WHY I JUST POST MORE ABOUT ANGST. It's something about angst that I love guys, and the reason I put "angst???" Is because when I wrote it, it felt like angst, but at the same time, it doesn't, so it's 50/50.

[shieldofiron]

Vibe Check Part 17

I'm a Lover, but I still Fight

Also on Ao3 here and tumblr here

Steve looks too damn good to be in here. He seems totally unaware of the attention, pausing on the dance floor to gather compliments like a beauty queen.

Billy’s dying for it on the other hand, every inch of his body buzzing with awareness when Steve glances his way, mid-dance, bopping his head and grinning like a maniac.

Billy’s a pro at acting like he’s not in love with Steve. In fact sometimes he feels like that’s what he really goes to college for. But tonight is his toughest test yet.

He stays close on the dance floor, always just friendly, keeping himself and Carver and Buckley around Steve so it isn’t too obvious when he shoots an admirer a harsh look.

Carver’s little friend from the gay straight alliance is lurking around too, possibly the only person besides Carver who seems to pick up on what Billy’s doing. But he’s just skulking with his friends, ignoring them.

Some asshole reaches for Steve’s hips and Billy pulls Steve into a goofy spin.

Steve’s all giggles, bopping to the beat, his brown eyes closed in bliss. The plan, so far that Billy’s brain can form one, is just to keep them dancing. It’s easier to keep Steve spinning so he can’t pay too much attention to Billy.

Because after that it's not too different from any other frat party: running Steve interference to keep him from going home with someone.

He doesn’t do it all the time, can’t for obvious reasons. He doesn’t own Steve. But he’s redirected sometimes. Pulled Steve into a game of beer pong or a keg stand to keep him stuck to Billy’s side.

Guilt sears him like a steak, but he justifies it to himself by promising that he’s showing Steve a good, and most importantly safe first time out at a gay bar. He’s just doing his due diligence as a member of the LGBTQIA+ community.

Buckley tugs at Billy’s sleeve, miming sipping a drink. She lost her cup a while ago by trying to pull a complex “get low” maneuver and she agreed to be a DD, so Billy will happily buy her all the Shirley Temples she wants.

Steve bounces on his heels, eyes glowing with excitement. “Yes!”

“Water,” Billy says sternly at the same time as Buckley, who points at Steve knowingly.

Steve spins and throws a heavy arm around both their shoulders. “Boo, you whore.”

“Jason?” Billy tips his chin at the bar.

Jason smiles softly, disentangling from the tattooed guy who’s wrapped around him like an octopus. Somehow he’s much more loose and free than Billy’s ever seen him at frat parties.

It makes Billy want to find this so-called boyfriend of Carver’s and give him a talking to.

Steve tows them toward the bar where the music is slightly lower and they crowd around the only open corner of the bar. Steve pulls out his dad’s credit card and squeezes between two people, waving off everyone’s protests and ordering shots.

“Do you guys come here often?” Buckley asks it generally as they make their way to a free spot a little ways away from where Steve has shoved in, but her eyes are glued to Billy.

“Why, Buckley,” Billy giggles and turns to fully face her, batting his eyelashes coyly, “buy me a drink before you throw me a line.”

She tosses her head and laughs. “No, but seriously.”

Billy looks at Carver, who seems totally checked out, staring at his phone like it owes him money, and then shoving it back in his pocket only to pull it out a millisecond later.

“We just went out once, a while ago. Carver’s the big Cottonmouth cowboy, not me.” Billy says with a shrug.

“You know any other places?” She asks.

“I’ve been to the sugar skull out in Muncie a few times, but I’m not like… into clubs.” Billy can hear how obvious he sounds, and he can only hope Buckley doesn’t pick up on it. He doesn’t like clubs so much as parties with his friends. Parties with Steve. And he doesn’t go out, he stays in, because the one he loves is at home.

Buckley’s eyes narrow the slightest bit and Billy can feel a cold sweat breaking out under what he worked up dancing. But luckily the spell is broken by Steve’s hearty laugh. Billy glances back over his shoulder helplessly, just to watch the way Steve’s head tips back as he hoots to the ceiling.

Billy turns a little more so he can see who makes his Steve laugh so hard.

He knows with his head to doubt what he sees. He knows that it’s not his dad, because that’s impossible.

But for a horrible second, the bar drops out from under his elbow and Billy’s pitching forward.

It’s partially the haircut and mustache, and the eyes, those icy blue eyes. They’re not quite what Billy sees in the mirror but it’s close enough that it has his breath tightening up to double time. And Steve is laughing, laying his hand on the guy’s chest, and the guy is old with blue eyes and a normy haircut and Billy knows this is fine but his heart… his heart…

His heart is gonna explode.

Buckley says something but it can’t get past the ringing in his ears and he can’t see any more because his eyes are swimming in something. She puts a hand on his arm and it feels awful, it feels like his heart is going to wrench out of his chest and fall to the floor with a wet splat.

Somehow he’s able to force his frozen muscles to move and make it, with slow staggering steps, to the bathroom. He closes himself into a stall so that he can die in peace.

Because that’s all he can think, all he can feel. He’s too locked in his dying body, stall swimming before his eyes, hands locked around the side of his head. His heart is pounding so hard that the stall is rattling and it’s all he can do to hold himself in one place.

He forces breath through his lungs by instinct more than anything, but the stall won’t stop rattling. There’s something at the edge of his vision, by the floor, and he shuts his eyes, too overwhelmed to know. He’s dying, he knows he’s dying. His dad is going to come. He’s going to see Billy, and that may as well be dying. If his life is about to flash before Billy’s eyes, he really wishes that it wouldn’t.

Slowly he becomes aware of something squeezing him from all around. It anchors him back in his body, bringing him back online to reality. He’s not dying, he’s just breathing really fast and sobbing, a combination that’s leaving him lightheaded.

He sucks in several breaths, gradually coming online to the strong arms around him and the scent of that $30 an ounce shampoo he knows all too well. Soft brown curls are tickling his nose and he breathes deeply to have a little more of Steve’s air inside him.

“I’m… I’m… how did you get in here?” He gasps.

“Crawled under the stall,” Steve murmurs, but it’s just soothing rumbles really. Billy melts into him, not even caring to hold back.

He doesn’t know how long they stand there until Billy’s sobs totally even out and he’s able to pull away.

“You ok?” Steve asks. He’s lost the cowboy hat somewhere so there’s nothing shading those big brown eyes from the bright overhead lights.

“I… yeah…” Billy says.

“What happened? I thought you were going to puke or something.”

“I wish.” Billy’s totally given up on making sense, he guesses. He suddenly feels far too tired for this conversation, entirely exhausted. He just wants to go home.

“What happened? Are you okay?”

Billy doesn’t want to repeat himself again, and he really doesn’t have anything prepared but the truth. “I saw… it’s my dad.”

“Your dad?” Steve blinks a few times, his head twitching in that adorable way it does when he’s trying to compute. “He’s here? He’s… gay?”

“No… I… that guy you were talking to. He looked like my dad.” God, that’s so pathetic. That’s nothing. And what’s more he really needs to wipe the snot off his face but he doesn’t know if he can do it with Steve watching.

“Oh.” Steve doesn’t remove his hands from Billy’s arms.

“I had just… a…” Billy shakes his head. “It was just a stupid moment of panic, that’s all.”

“It’s not stupid.” Steve tugs him forward into another full-bodied hug and it makes Billy’s worn-out eyes prickle. “Man, I’m so sorry. Do you wanna talk about it?”

No. “Yes, I… I don’t wanna ruin your night though.”

“Who the fuck cares about that?” Steve speaks the words and they shake loose something in Billy’s chest that has the tears free flowing again.

“It’s just… obviously a worst nightmare. I mean he wouldn’t be… obviously he wouldn’t be caught dead in a p-place like this but I just saw that guy and I… I locked up, you know?”

“Your dad,” Steve holds him tighter, squeezing gently. “He’s really homophobic?”

And Billy can’t blame Steve, because it’s not as if he’s ever talked about his dad beyond a comment here or there. Billy knows instinctively that Steve assumes Billy hates his dad the same way Steve hates his dad. With like snipes about politics and the occasional strained conversation. Steve’s dad hates that Steve is a film major, and sends slightly out of touch texts about his high school basketball team.

Billy’s dad wants Billy scorched off the face of the planet. But it’s easier to pretend, for everyone’s sake, that he’s just kind of an asshole who never calls.

And Billy was and is very cool with Steve assuming that, because it makes him feel almost like a real person.

Not what Billy is, which is broken and desperate. The kind of person who cries in bathroom stalls.

Billy has to suck in a few more breaths before he can go on. “My dad… when I was sixteen he found a guy’s p-picture on my phone. He… he hurt me so bad I woke up a day later in the hospital. It was a miracle I didn’t suffer more permanent brain damage, because it was almost a coma.”

Steve says nothing, and Billy was grateful Steve doesn’t immediately stop holding him, because Steve is the only thing holding him up right now.

“He wanted to move us out of state because the nurses were asking questions, I guess a cop was sniffing around.” Billy sniffles again.

“What happened?” Steve prompts when Billy takes a beat too long to continue.

“Argyle. His mom’s a lawyer, family law. She took me on pro bono after Argyle snuck a picture of me in the hospital. She helped me get out, get emancipated. And my step-mother, she was able to use it in court too. B-because it was on record,” Billy sniffs again, and Steve pulls back from the hug. Billy’s about to panic again that he said something finally so wretchedly pathetic that Steve would leave. But instead Steve just wipes sloppily and Billy’s face with his hand, and then leans down to get some toilet paper to clean up.

“What… was it the first time he’d hit you?”

Billy laughs just a little too hard, because that question hurts, and it’s either going to be a laugh or a sob.

“Not by a long shot.”

Steve’s open face shutters for a second, all the light gone from his pretty boy eyes, and with it something vital in Billy’s chest begins to fail. This is why he never told Steve. He couldn’t stand to see that pity and derision.

But just as quick as it came, the look was replaced with something else, something much craftier.

“Want me to pick a bar fight with Dale?” Steve says.

Billy sputters, “who the fuck is Dale?”

“The guy who looks like your dad. He’s a total sweetheart.”

Billy laughs, a lot less painful this time. “Why would you do that?”

“It’s the closest I’ll get to punching your dad. For now, at least.” Steve smiles, and rubs Billy’s shoulders. “You wanna go home?”

Billy’s shoulders relax just a little, and he feels marginally less wound up. “Fuck yeah. I’m fuckin’ exhausted.”

“Then let's go home.” Steve smiles just a little brighter, and Billy was too damn tired to analyze it. He’s too tired to do anything but rest on his best friend’s shoulders as they stumble out of the bathroom. Carver and Buckley are waiting for them, but one look at the two of them and they clam up. Billy does his best to avoid everyone’s eye but unfortunately he can’t ignore Buckley is giving him mad side eye.

She accepts Steve’s keys without much comment and Carver doesn’t kick up a fuss either, waving off his GSA friends and scowling at his phone as they make their way out of the bar.

Billy can see the night’s stars and neon signs reflected in the parking lot puddles, feeling breathless for no reason. Steve all but shoves him into the backseat and joins him there. Billy can see Buckley glance back several times as they back out of the lot. But Billy ignores it in favor of closing his eyes and resting on Steve’s shoulder, and letting the rest of the night drift away.

[namgyunation]

going to the mall

ok, alive!team thanos au where they get out of the games and all go to the mall together and nobody murders each other...... :]

thanos insisted on picking everyone up (even though se-mi wanted to just meet them there), and is a reckless driver. he has the windows all the way down and his music on max volume. nam-gyu's in the passenger seat, and min-su's squished in the back between se-mi and gyeong-su, getting jostled around. he's terrified

se-mi buys something in the food court; nam-gyu and thanos say they're not hungry, but then when they lean in for a bite, they take the most heinous chomp ever (thanos asked, nam-gyu just took one) and then she beats the shit out of them

se-mi's only there for min-su and often walks in front of the rest of them, trying to pretend like she doesn't know them

se-mi and nam-gyu accidentally show up in eerily matching outfits (i think they'd have a similar sense of style), and they both pretend like it doesn't bother them

thanos constantly steps out to go to the bathroom bc he's hitting his vape

thanos and nam-gyu force min-su to try on clothes and dress him up. they try to force him to buy the fits they put together for him, and when he politely declines, thanos just buys it for him anyway and makes him put it on. he does it because he feels guilty over someone else spending money on him (the fit looks... stupid as hell </3)

gyeong-su insists on holding all of thanos's shopping bags even though he didn't ask him to. he's also constantly taking selfies with everyone (namely, thanos) to brag about it on his socials later

when they're looking in a store with CDs and records, nam-gyu and se-mi end up in the same section, and they're horrified to find out that they like a lot of the same bands. they both ask each other to 'name 3 songs' at the same time

later, they're in a video game store and find out that they have a similar taste in video games as well. se-mi's looking at a specific title when nam-gyu scoffs, saying that that one is shit and the old version was better. they proceed to have a heated discussion over each other's video game opinions

min-su lags behind and wanders somewhere else for like. a couple minutes. he's fine. but thanos insists on going to the help desk and paging him over the intercom, making it sound like he's their lost child

thanos buys little pretzel dogs and then randomly starts throwing them at the others, telling them to 'catch'. he only stops when se-mi yells at him for getting grease on her jeans

headcanon that se-mi likes cute things, including little keychains. she buys a blind box from a small shop, and everyone else does too, just for the fun of it, though she doesn't ask them to. they all open theirs to find out which plushie keychain they got. gyeong-su makes a comment about how "they're all matching" (he lowkey only says this so thanos will acknowledge it and he can now say that he's matching with his idol)

nam-gyu pretends that he doesn't care about the blind box when he buys it and tells himself he's only doing it because everyone else is, but when he opens his, he finds that he was secretly hoping for a specific one and got the one that he was hoping he wouldn't get. when he looks over at what everyone else got, he realizes that se-mi got the one he wants. he stares at it dangling from her belt loop (she notices) until she turns around, rolling her eyes before she takes hers off and tosses it at him and rips his out of his pocket. turns out, she secretly wanted the one that he got, too. "there, since you're too shy to ask me."

they all go home in the thanos-mobile, and he says they should all do this again sometime. gyeong-su is the only one who enthusiastically agrees, but everyone had a good time, se-mi included (though she won't say it out loud)

thanos hangs his keychain on his rearview mirror, gyeong-su puts his on his backpack, se-mi's alternates between her purse and her belt loop (it's in a protective clear bag), min-su's stays by his desk, and nam-gyu's gets stuffed in the bottom of his pocket or bag (somewhere hidden) when he can convince himself to give a fuck. he doesn't like to acknowledge or think about why he does it (it lowkey gets a little grimey from being thrown around so much. he secretly takes care of it and washes it from time to time)

projecting my own interests onto thanos team yayyyyyyyy. also that one picture of se-mi and nam-gyu out of character where he has her nose piercing on makes me want to push my reluctant se-mi and nam-gyu friendship agenda........

[itsaspectrumcomic]

Hello :),

[EDIT: This is a super long asks, sorry about that 😭. I‘m just very unsure of this whole topic and I tend to ramble when I‘m nervous.] I‘ve been following your little comics for a while now (and always thought "ah, I do have a few symptoms but I‘m surely not autistic, I‘m not that extreme") aaaaaaand it turns out I may have it! At least every single test I did (which were a lot with a few months in between) resulted in a high percentage and I‘m actively looking for a therapist to get an official diagnosis- but that‘s not the point I‘m trying to get to, sorry I‘m rambling a bit.

Ahem I‘m still pretty new in this autism… community? Can one call it like that? And I constantly doubt my self-diagnosis and stuff, especially because I have trouble finding out if something is a special interest or just a hobby. Recently, I saw one of your comics in which you mentioned books would be a special interest of yours (or have been in the past). Is that really a thing? I‘ve had a phase where multiple people told me I was addicted to books because I just couldn‘t stop reading/rambling. Whenever I had the time I read, and that is not an exaggeration, I read from morning to evening. Over the years, I started analyzing the books, making up my own stories and getting into writing. Now (which means in the last seven months) my… hobby has changed to (over) analyzing every aspect of a specific show I‘ve watched, and how every tool (animation, camera work, music etc.) was used to enhance the story. I literally can‘t just… not talk about it. It‘s agonizing to talk about other topics, although it has somewhat gone better over course of the last couple of months. And the worst is that the show‘s second season was a total writing disaster and I can‘t stop thinking about it, to the point that I kind of want to slam my head in the wall just to get it out and focus on idk. My English exam or smth. It went so far that I actually started my own rewrite because it bugs me so much how the writing changed and-

I‘m stopping here. Sorry again I‘m also a bit sleepy rn, so my brain is not working correctly. What I‘m actually asking is: does that sound like a hyperfixation? Because every website so far has told me autism means obsessing over niche topics, but writing and books are pretty mainstream, right?

Oh and how the heck am I supposed to know what is neurotypical and what’s autistic?? Because ever since I started researching, I keep catching myself doing stuff like rearranging spoons so the comfortable spoons are on top, or keeping tissues in my pockets to rip them when stressed, but isn’t that normal? Everyone wants to have the comfortable spoons on top, right? Right??

All I‘m saying is… I’m confused. And nervous. And constantly doubt myself. Your comic made me think that maybe some of the self-doubt wasn‘t as warranted because special interests don‘t have to be super… special?

Yeah and I really like your comics byeee :).

Hello, I'm glad you like my comics! :)

Anything can be a special interest! It doesn't matter if it's considered mainstream or a lot of other people like it too, and it doesn't have to be 'strange' or 'niche'. If you are intensely focused on a subject, activity, piece of media etc, spend a lot of time thinking about it, learning about it, talking about it, and get a lot of joy out of it, that counts as a special interest. The difference is the intensity.

For example, a neurotypical person might like Marvel shows, enjoy watching them and chatting about them with friends and maybe own some fandom related merch or occasionally write fanfics, whereas an autistic person with Marvel as a special interest might rewatch them over and over, have dialogue memorised, want to collect every figurine, write about and analyse it, know trivia about the production and the comics etc.

(This is a generalisation btw - a person can be obsessed with something without being autistic, they'd need to have other traits too. And you don't have to know absolutely everything about a subject for it to be a special interest.)

All that to say yes, if you have an intense interest in books, reading them, writing them, analysing them, then it definitely counts! Same goes for your show :)

If you relate to that and other autistic traits, you are welcome to consider yourself part of the autistic community.

(Btw, I think most neurotypical people don't really think about whether the most comfortable spoon is on top. I think they just put the spoons in the draw and move on to something else.)

[crowsalvation]

This bed was ridiculously comfy, it curved around them in all the right places and Damon would agree to lay here forever- if that is what she wanted. He made a mental note to ask for the brand, already planning on buying one for them to enjoy together.

If they went home together.

That thought lingered as Elena skimmed through the menu. What would happen between them once they left New York? The tension would be unbearable—Caroline, Bonnie, and especially Stefan. Would they try to talk her out of this? Convince her this was nothing more than a mistake?

Elena stretched out next to him, long and graceful like a cat sunbathing, and he couldn't help but let his gaze li trail over her, committing every inch to memory. She was a sight he would never tire of—not now and not in a hundred years.

“I was planning on staring at you all night.” He teased but with a little hint of truth in it as a hand found its way onto her core, tracing a light and lazy touch. If it wasn’t for the sound of her stomach, Damon would just forget the food all together but he didn’t want her to go without because of his selfishness. “But we can eat first.”

Reluctantly, Damon sat up on the edge of the bed to get the phone and dialed the number for the hotel kitchen. “Hello, yes.” He started off, eyes skimming the menu as he named off the items they were wanting. “Make it rare. The lamb? Medium.” A complete guess on how she’d like hers done, he assumed she wouldn’t stomach it if it was too red. “For dessert, chocolate ganache cake.” A slight pause. “No. Let's do the whole cake. And the final thing…” Damon filled the menu over to the drinks side. “The finest red wine this place has.” The call was over with that, he could tell by the butler taking the order that it was an impressive sized order but probably not the most expensive this place has ever received.

Damon hung up the phone, satisfied. "It'll be here within the hour," he said, settling back onto the bed beside Elena. They could turn on the TV, watch a movie, or play some music, but nothing compared to simply watching her, listening to the steady rhythm of her heartbeat. How many nights had he slipped into her house just to check on her, especially when Stefan was away? How many times had he whispered silent prayers to whatever god would listen, hoping that one day he’d get to lie beside her like this?

“Oh you know me, impulsive and reckless.” Damon shrugged with one shoulder, eyes rolling playfully as he quickly thought back to all the unkind things she had said to him in the past about his behaviors, funny how things have turned. There was no real need for him to worry when she took hold of his phone, but that little sliver of doubt crept up  in his mind because he knew who it was. He knew how strong of a hold Stefan had on her for the longest time and there was always going to be that little bit of unease when it came to her and him. What he heard, however, was something he only dreamt of and Damon was left shocked, visibility, by what she was telling Stefan. Stefan would listen to her too, would do as he was told like a good boy but the witch, not so much. 

“I want to be selfish.”He took his phone from her, tossed it to the bed nearby and cupped her cheeks all in one swift motion. “I want to lock us up in this room-” He stroked her cheeks with his thumbs before he slowly trailed them down her cheeks, over the curvature of her lips His thumbs followed her jawline, traced the length of her neck, and his eyes hungrily took her in. “-and not let anyone else in.” 

“Let’s order you something to eat first. I’m sure you’re starving by now.” After all, they were out the night before drinking and she’s gone hours at this point without eating. Damon tries to keep up with her human needs- the eating, drinking of the water, and sleeping. It was a lot to keep track of. “Then we can go out, explore the city together.” He couldn’t keep her locked up forever, it is not like they’re safer here where Bonnie could easily locate them than out there in the busy city. 

He leaned in, his breath ghosting over her lips, and for a second, there was nothing else—no Stefan, no Bonnie, no looming consequences. Just them. But then, as always, reality found its way back in and he heard her stomach confirm what he was thinking. “Told you, “ He was smug about being right, and his kiss averted from her lips to her nose with a little peck. “You need food before I can properly ravish you.” Damon disappeared from in front of her, only to reappear on the bed with his inhuman speed, the menu for the hotel now in his hands as he reads on the listen what sounds good to them. “I’ll get… a steak, rare of course.”

[rewhitehaus]

weird ass cover of "the weight she fell under" i just finished(?). fuck garageband and fuck those midi drums i wish i could play real drums!!!!!

[articskele]

Thinking about....... Sun Onceler.........

[cathymee]

cont. i love rambling in the tags + no u can never make me make a post that has like 100 words in it

[tearlessrain]

please help me- i used to be pretty smart but i’m having so much trouble grasping the concept of diegetic vs non-diegetic bdsm!

gfkjldghfd okay first of all I'm sorry for the confusion, if you're not finding anything on the phrase it's because I made it up and absolutely nobody but me ever uses it, but I haven't found a better way to express what I'm trying to say so I keep using it. but now you've given me an excuse to ramble on about some shit that is only relevant to me and my deeply inefficient way of talking and by god I'm going to take it.

SO. the way diegetic and non-diegetic are normally used is to talk about music and sound design in movies/tv shows. in case you aren't familiar with that concept, here's a rundown:

diegetic sound is sound that happens within the world of the movie/show and can be acknowledged by the characters, like a song playing on the stereo during a driving scene, or sung on stage in Phantom of the Opera. it's also most other sounds that happen in a movie, like the sounds of traffic in a city scene, or a thunderclap, or a marching band passing by. or one of the three stock horse sounds they use in every movie with a horse in it even though horses don't really vocalize much in real life, but that's beside the point, the horse is supposed to be actually making that noise within the movie's world and the characters can hear it whinnying.

non-diegetic sound is any sound that doesn't exist in the world of the movie/show and can't be perceived by the characters. this includes things like laugh tracks and most soundtrack music. when Duel of Fates plays in Star Wars during the lightsaber fight for dramatic effect, that's non-diegetic. it exists to the audience, but the characters don't know their fight is being backed by sick ass music and, sadly, can't hear it.

the lines can get blurry between the two, you've probably seen the film trope where the clearly non-diegetic music in the title sequence fades out to the same music, now diegetic and playing from the character's car stereo. and then there are things like Phantom of the Opera as mentioned above, where the soundtrack is also part of the plot, but Phantom of the Opera does also have segments of non-diegetic music: the Phantom probably does not have an entire orchestra and some guy with an electric guitar hiding down in his sewer just waiting for someone to break into song, but both of those show up in the songs they sing down there.

now, on to how I apply this to bdsm in fiction.

if I'm referring to diegetic bdsm what I mean is that the bdsm is acknowledged for what it is in-world. the characters themselves are roleplaying whatever scenarios their scenes involve and are operating with knowledge of real life rules/safety practices. if there's cnc depicted, it will be apparent at some point, usually right away, that both characters actually are fully consenting and it's all just a planned scene, and you'll often see on-screen negotiation and aftercare, and elements of the story may involve the kink community wherever the characters are. Love and Leashes is a great example of this, 50 Shades and Bonding are terrible examples of this, but they all feature characters that know they're doing bdsm and are intentional about it.

if I'm talking about non-diegetic bdsm, I'm referring to a story that portrays certain kinks without the direct acknowledgement that the characters are doing bdsm. this would be something like Captive Prince, or Phantom of the Opera again, or the vast majority of bodice ripper type stories where an innocent woman is kidnapped by a pirate king or something and totally doesn't want to be ravished but then it turns out he's so cool and sexy and good at ravishing that she decides she's into it and becomes his pirate consort or whatever it is that happens at the end of those books. the characters don't know they're playing out a cnc or D/s fantasy, and in-universe it's often straight up noncon or dubcon rather than cnc at all. the thing about entirely non-diegetic bdsm is that it's almost always Problematic™ in some way if you're not willing to meet the story where it's at, but as long as you're not judging it by the standards of diegetic bdsm, it's just providing the reader the same thing that a partner in a scene would: the illusion of whatever risk or taboo floats your boat, sometimes to extremes that can't be replicated in real life due to safety, practicality, physics, the law, vampires not being real, etc. it's consensual by default because it's already pretend; the characters are vehicles for the story and not actually people who can be hurt, and the reader chose to pick up the book and is aware that nothing in it is real, so it's all good.

this difference is where people tend to get hung up in the discourse, from what I've observed. which is why I started using this phrasing, because I think it's very crucial to be able to differentiate which one you're talking about if you try to have a conversation with someone about the portrayal of bdsm in media. it would also, frankly, be useful for tagging, because sometimes when you're in the mood for non-diegetic bodice ripper shit you'd call the police over in real life, it can get really annoying to read paragraphs of negotiation and check-ins that break the illusion of the scene and so on, and the opposite can be jarring too.

it's very possible to blur these together the same way Phantom of the Opera blurs its diegetic and non-diegetic music as well. this leaves you even more open to being misunderstood by people reading in bad faith, but it can also be really fun to play with. @not-poignant writes fantastic fanfic, novels, and original serials on ao3 that pull this off really well, if you're okay with some dark shit in your fiction I would highly recommend their work. some of it does get really fucking dark in places though, just like. be advised. read the tags and all that.

but yeah, spontaneous writer plug aside, that's what I mean.

[phagodyke]

took me until half 8 to manage to leave the house to get groceries. literally done nothing else all fucking day except try to motivate myself to do this. nothing wrong w me

[lightseoul]

a/n. second time writing from bkg's perspective. this was so fun! (1.1k)

the moment that cemented bakugou’s resolve to marry you wasn’t exactly grand.

it wasn’t your first kiss.

or the first time you made love to each other.

not even the first time you met his nerd-ass friends or his (slightly) overbearing parents. although those two come as close runner-ups.

no, it was rather a random saturday morning after you spent a night at his place, now clad in what he thinks is nothing but your intimates and a burnt orange t-shirt of his that drapes loosely over your frame.

and as he enters the kitchen and closes the distance between the two of you with a few strides, he can’t help but wonder what you’re doing—deeply focused on your laptop—when you’re probably the one who’s extra pedantic about not bringing work home.

“morning,” he grunts, leaning down to kiss your cheek, which you happily accept. although, to his chagrin, your eyes remain on your computer screen, not even sparing him a single glance.

he knows it’s fucking embarrassing, how strongly you elicit feelings within him without you even fucking trying, but he can’t stop the frown that takes over his face even if he attempted to fight it.

shaking off the irrational disappointment from not even being ignored, he rounds the kitchen island and starts brewing the two of you coffee.

“by the way,” he starts, glancing at you over his shoulder, “the old hag’s birthday is coming up. she wants to have dinner with just the four of us, or some shit.”

“i know,” you simply pipe up from where you’re seated on one of his fancy bar stools, gaze still glued on whatever the fuck it is that’s keeping your attention from him.

he turns to you, a manual coffee grinder in tow. “you do?”

at that, you finally look up at him, an innocent expression etched across your features. “you don’t remember? i asked you when your parents’ birthdays were way back in march.”

way back in march.

back when you unanimously decided to decisively end the dating phase and become boyfriend-girlfriend.

“yeah?” is the only thing he manages to get out.

you let out a soft laugh that’s nothing but music to his ears. “yeah, dummy.”

before you can get to see the red that’s most definitely creeping up to his cheeks, bakugou turns his back against you, returning to busying himself with crushing the beans into fine powder and pouring lukewarm water into the machine.

only a few months before reaching a full year together, and you still manage to make him fucking blush.

over the most mundane things, too.

when he first got into his very first relationship with you at the ripe age of 28, he thought he’d outgrown and was way past the embarrassing shit that the human body was capable of when dealing with anything remotely close to romance.

it didn’t take him long enough into your relationship to find out he was so, so wrong.

sighing, he pours out the cup of ground beans onto the filter, finally pressing the button and bringing the coffee maker to life.

you must be done with what’s highly likely is work by now.

but chancing a glance at you, he’s once again met with palpable disappointment when the very same sight greets him.

before he can rein them in, the words come tumbling out of his lips.

“the fuck is so important on that laptop?”

his booming voice must’ve caught you off guard, because you startle ever so minutely in your seat.

“sorry,” he quickly adds on, albeit through a mutter; frustration with himself and his inability to modulate his voice added to the increasingly long list of emotions he’s having to fucking deal with right now.

waving him off, you shoot him another one of that disarming smile of yours. “‘s funny that you ask. i was just about to ask you for your opinion.”

with that, you gesture him to come close with your fingers. curious, he once again rounds the island, ultimately occupying the spot to your right and leaning down to peer at the small text on your screen.

before he can even get a word in, you hurriedly explain yourself. “mitsuki-san mentioned her personal sewing machine broke, so i’ve been thinking about getting her a new one.”

you point to a sleek, off-white model among what looks to be a vast array of selections, “i researched the specs and i think this one’s the best. what do you think?”

a million things course through his mind in an instant, but what he ends up sputtering out is: “you’re such a fucking nerd, you know that?”

at that, you look up at him, your seemingly perpetually moisturized lips now formed into a playful pout, and it takes everything in him not to just pull you in for a kiss and completely abandon the conversation in its entirety.

but he’d like to think he at least has the slightest bit of self-control.

even if you do wear him the fuck out on a daily basis.

“i just want to make sure it’s perfect!” you argue, shifting to stare at your laptop again and bringing him back to the present. your voice is way smaller when you continue. “…i want her to like me.”

he doesn’t even miss a beat. “she already fucking does, dumbass.”

and she really does.

the morning after bakugou first brought you to meet his parents a whopping two months into calling it official, mitsuki texted him something along the lines of having the family heirloom slash ring already adjusted to fit your finger.

he immediately called the old hag after receiving the message just to reprimand her ear off for being too fucking forward and for meddling too much.

but, if he were to be completely honest with himself, he was angry not because mitsuki was imposing, but because he couldn’t believe his mother beat him to that important realization.

the realization that maybe, just maybe, you’re the one.

and now, as he studies you as you scroll through more and more iterations of the best sewing machines on the market with your eyebrows adorably furrowed in utmost concentration, it dawns on him.

it dawns on him that that maybe just turned into a definitely.

tagging. @bunnysaursushii @yawnzzzzzzzz @cholios @kashee-h @iluv-ace @lotuslovers @elarakive @sugurusmoon

˖⁺‧₊ this one made me smile like an idiot while writing lmao. as always, reblogs, replies, and tags are appreciated <3 have a nice day!

[totalswag]

hii, I’m not sure if you take request still but if so is there a possible way you can do a drew x singer!reader one shot take on how Sabrina “arrests” her fans before performing Juno for being too hot but the reader does it to Drew during her shows please 🫶🏼

arrested for being too hot — DREW STARKEY

authors note THANK YOU FOR REQUESTING THIS!! my request box is still open so feel free to send me any ideas regarding singer!reader or regular fic ideas you’d like me to write. this was so much writing too. thank for all the love on my last fic lovies <3

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summary "arresting" drew, your boyfriend, during your show before performing your song from your new album.

warning(s) none!

You are on tour for your new album in-front of thousands of fans almost every night. You worked hard on this album and it turned out wonderfully. If it weren’t for the amazing fans of yours, you don’t know where you’d be in your career— they are the reason you are doing this.

Half way into the show— going amazing. The crowd tonight isn't disappointing you. Everything you've hoped for on this tour. You've performed eighteen songs and about to go onto your nineteenth. Played musical spin the bottle not long ago which was really fun.

Before Juno, you begin with a small "skit" where you call someone out in the crowd, arresting them for being too hot. This became a thing after your first show of the tour and doing it ever since. Plus, fans absolutely love it. Interacting with your fans has always been something you did and create those bonds.

Drew, your boyfriend, is attending the show with Madelyn Cline, a mutual friend and cast-mate of Drew's. You told him earlier today you wanted to arrest him in the middle of the show to get the audience excited and it would be fun.

Drew was all for it, and he didn't want you to tell him what you were going to say—he prefers surprises.

Your pink, glittering, dazzling clothing was sparkling in the lights. You pressed your free hand to your brow as though you were looking around for a call. With security, you could see Drew and Madelyn making their way to the front.

You begin by adjusting your earpiece while moving around the stage in your long skirt. "You guys know that moment when you are in a room filled with such beautiful looking people that you start to feel overwhelmed?" When fans applaud, you smile.

"Oh, girls, I think I just seen my future husband in the front row! Oh my god, girls, come here, come here," you say anxiously into the microphone, beckoning them over and waving your free hand.

You turn to face Drew as the girls approach you, asking, "Do you see that gorgeous looking man over in the front row with his arms crossed in the tan shirt?" You speak into the microphone aloud, pointing to Drew in the crowd.

Your girls joyfully waved at Drew while placing their hands on your shoulder. As Drew blushes on the big screen, the crowd reflexively turns up the volume in the arena. 

"What's your name handsome?" With your head cocked slightly to the right toward your shoulder, you inquire in jest. 

"Drew!" You can hear him when he places his hands on the side of his lips. He gives you a childlike smile and a flushed face.

You say, "I'm sorry I couldn't get that?" as though you couldn't hear him. Leaning forward more, you place your free hand behind your ear.

He shakes his head and utters "Drew!" a little louder. 

"Oh my Drew, I must say that you must be a magnet because you drew me in" brings a smile to your face. Your tone indicated that you were trying quite hard not to laugh, yet you kept your calm brilliantly.

Fans had their phones out, capturing the entire interaction. Nobody would have expected Drew to be the person arrested at your gigs since the tour began.

"Drew, you are under arrest for being too hot," you say aloud, smiling and pointing at him— fanning yourself, moving your hips side to side as the sound of sirens going off with blue and red lights behind.

You put your left elbow against your girls shoulder, "guys do you ever just see someone so good looking that you just don't know what to do and all your clothes fall off in that moment" your long skirt slips off smoothy.

"Like your brain just like malfunctions and like I just wanna handcuffed to you now like," one of your girls puts the pink fluffy handcuffs into your hand, you kneel down, "do you know what I mean? Will you take these from me?"

Drew is overwhelmed in this very moment— it's very obvious how much you are affecting him. Drew gives you a gimme me gesture with his fingers, ready to catch the hand cuffs.

He takes them in his hands, looks down, and feels the smooth texture of the fuzzy. He tilts his head to the side before slowly glancing up at you with a smirk—keep in mind that he's still on the big screen.

"We're gonna sing this one to you, Drew."

Juno's song intro starts playing. You wave goodbye to Drew and Madelyn as you return to the center of the stage. You could hear the two begin speaking to fans in the distance.

Drew and Madelyn met you in the dressing room following the show. After giving Madelyn a hug and thanking her for attending the event, you moved to approach Drew and put your arms around his neck while grinning.

"That was insane," Madelyn exclaimed, pulling you into a hug. "What about the full call-out and the handcuffs? Iconic! "You're the talk of the night; everyone is crazy about it."

You giggled as your face heated up. "It seemed right." "You should have seen his face!"

She laughs, "I got the whole thing on video, I'll send it to you later."

"I'm going to give you two some alone time, but you did such an amazing job tonight and looked so hot doing it," Madelyn adds, taking your hands in her and wiggling her brows. 

"Thank you, babe. I love you always," you say, hugging her before she leaves you and Drew alone. 

When you close the door, Drew comes behind you, placing his arms around your waist and kissing you on the cheek, making you laugh with the tenderness of his lips.

"I'm so proud of you baby, you did such an amazing job on stage and looked unbelievable in your outfits made me feel like the luckiest guy in the entire world." He expresses emotionally, which uplifts you. 

"Coming from you, it warms my heart baby. Forever grateful to have you in my life," you smile softly, leaning against his chest, feeling that sense of warmth you always feel whenever you are with him.

"And I'm forever grateful for you" he quietly responds, kissing the top of your head.

"So what are we gonna do with those pink fuzzy handcuffs?"

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