#no jokes this time i guess oops
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thenorwalkagent · 2 years ago
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Thinking about grief, devotion, and despair after Golden Wind
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crest-of-gautier · 2 years ago
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ALL HAIL THE SOUYO FLAG!! (by catnatch)
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tetzoro · 9 days ago
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You're halfway through folding laundry when two familiar hands cover over your eyes. The smell of sweat, metal and sake washes over you and you can't help but roll your eyes behind the hands as you drawl out,
“Goodness, who could it be?”
There's a slight rumble from the chest behind your head as it pulls you to it, though the hands don't move from their spot.
You give an over-exaggerated sigh before snickering out, “Okay Franky, you got-”
“Franky?! You kiddin’ me?!”
You laugh outright at the outburst, knowing it confused and infuriated your poor green haired lover all the same. Your hands drop the shirt you were folding and gently cover over the larger ones, pulling them from your eyes as you lean back into Zoros broad chest properly.
“Why the surprise?” You question, curiosity in your eyes as his steel grey one stares back down at you. An annoying tint of pink covers his cheeks as he mutters, “Can't surprise my pretty girl? Damn.” He then smirks slightly, a joking tone dancing on his lips as he presses a quick kiss to your temple as he murmurs against your skin, “Learn somethin’ new about you every damn day.”
You chuckle again, though you press a kiss of your own to each of his palms. “You trying to surprise me because it's my birthday?”
There's a chilling silence from your lover and you look up at him with wide eyes as you ask softly, “... you know it's my birthday, right?”
Zoro blinks once, twice, before he mutters in confusion, “It's your birthday?”
You gasp and swat at him, only for his laughter to break you out of your shock as his hands grip your wrist gently. “Don't be stupid, of course I know it's your birthday.” He's quick to press a few chaste kisses to your wrist before holding your palm to his cheek.
“I got somethin’ for you. You gonna come open your gift or you gonna fold laundry all damn day?”
You grin and roll your eyes again before giving another sigh, this time with a wide shrug as you tease back, “Well, I guess your gift is more important than some laundry…”
Zoro chuckles lowly at your joking tone, pulling you up as he stands straight, though he keeps his hand in yours the whole time.
“Good, because I worked damn hard pickin’ out something you'd actually like.”
You grin and slyly ask,
“And how much do you owe Nami for asking for her help?”
Zoro pretends to be wounded, holding his free hand over his heart as he snarks back, “Not a damn thing, thank you very much.”
You both stare at each other for a moment, your gaze disbelieving to the point it pulls a deep sigh from him a few moments later as he hangs his head slightly.
“... too much, Aims. Too damn much.”
You laugh again and pull him closer before getting on your tippy toes to press a few kisses to his jawline and the corner of his lips. “Zo, you could have got me a bottle of sake and I'd have cried. You didn't need to go all out.”
He grins slightly before snatching your lips up with his own, humming against them for a moment before he pulls away with a muttered,
“Just wait till you see. Promise you'll like it, no matter what it is?”
You grin in response with a slight nod, gushing in earnest, “Of course, Zo. You picked it out, how could I not love it?”
Zoro hums in agreement before pulling you into his arms, pressing another quick kiss to the top of your head before he jokes,
“Then stop wasting time and come open my gift.”
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HAPPY BIRTHDAY AIMS LOVELY !!!!! I hope you don't mind the lil blurb, I saw it was your birthday and just had to write some soft Zoro for you 🥺🥺🥺💖💖💖💖 I hope your day has been as wonderful, kind and warm as you are 💖💖💖💖💖💖 ALL MY LOVE TO YOUUU !!! 💖💖💖💖💖💖🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉
mandie .. MANDIE !! you did NOT just leave me the most beautiful and wonderful gif on my little doorstep ! i can not tell you how many times i’ve read this :( i am going to give you my unhinged reactions in the tags ofc but firstly !! thank you for doing this for me, i feel so incredibly touched that you put in the time to create this for me 🥺🥺 you’re so thoughtful and i am giving you the biggest hug in existence !!!! THANK YOU !! SENDING YOU SO MUCH LOVE !!! and giving you as many smooches as you want ^___^ !
now . for the fic . rubbing my hands together like a little fly hehe. let’s see if i can keep this coherent enough, shall we ? (<- said moments before i incoherently express everything)
ft. my moodboard of emotions i felt during reading btw
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#RIGHT OFF THE BAT IM GIGGLING AND KICKING MY FEET !! i loooove love love that zoro smells like metal sake and sweat (yeah im down bad bye)#idk stinky men irl ?? no. stinky zoro? i can’t get enough.#i feel like that combo on him would be heavenly and i probably weird him out everytime i inhale it >_< OKAY WAIT IM RAMBLING#thinking he’s franky bye i know his ego hurt LOL ill kiss it better <3 mwah mwah mwah three kiss style#‘can’t surprise my pretty girl?’ <- ENOUGH. I LOVE THAT PET NAME WITH HIM IM GOING FERAL . INSANE . VISIBILY TREMBLING !!!!#damn him joking around that he forgot my bday hurt my ego now /j LMFAO guess we are even#he says that and i’d start to pout and he’d immediately backtrack before i kick off#BUT WAIT ! the kiss to the wrist :( i feel so soft and mushy :( best way to shut me up tbh#WHEN HE SAID MY NAMEEEEEE OH MANNNNN IM SHSKSJDJD YOU NEVER SEE THAT IN FICS YK SO WHEN I READ IT IM LIKE OH MY GOD HE SAID MY NAME LMFAOOO#(im delusional thank u for feeding me that was such a nice touch LOL)#‘Zo you could have got me a bottle of sake and I'd have cried.#<- this is actually so me i feel so seen rn . anytime someone does even the smallest act of kindness toward me i get all weepy#OOP THE KISS EVERYONE STOP !!!!! . . . carry on. i needed a moment thank youu#oh man :( mandie :( this gift is so special to me thank you so much for taking the time to do this :(#you have a heart of gold and i cannot even express how much this made me smile and continues to make me smile when i reread it#ILYSM !!!!!!!#⌕ — spotted .ᐟ#ᰔ 𓂃 mandie .ᐟ#(づ ˘͈ ᵕ ˘͈ )づ 🎂 (∩˃ ᵕ ˂∩ ྀི)#◟˚. ꫂ ၴႅၴ ⋆ 𝓉𝓇ℯ𝒶𝓈𝓊𝓇ℯ𝓈.#🪷 ⊹ ₊ ⋆ ᴀᴍᴏʀᴏ .
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risingsunresistance · 1 year ago
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goodmorning everyone, i found a huge bug in skyblock KJFDHG
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un-pearable · 2 years ago
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Chen anon. Oh same I love this terrible little guy sm already too. Lloyd reconnecting with like Brad and he’s like do remember some kid named Chen, he went there and he like hates me. Oh lloyd you don’t remember? You got both of you a fail in the name of evil. Huh. But Skylor asking kai for how to deal with new shitty little brother advice. Idk save him from a volcano? Me & Lloyd got really close after that
Also like movie Skylor & Chen where post defeating her dad she invites the ninja over to her house. Chens home too and theyre like what’re YOU doing here?! I live here? In this scenario it’s still secret identity stuff bc those shenanigans are so fun. Skylor has so much sibling bullying ammo with actually you make fun of the green ninja all the time but you don’t know it, unfortunately she doesn’t get to put it to use.
i think we’ve just created the world’s worst narrative foils. go team!! kai can’t take you anywhere lloyd
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pasteltraitor · 1 year ago
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guys what do u do when ur sona becomes an oc ;-; i cant change their name so now they just have my name too
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strandedcrow · 2 years ago
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hot girls aren’t able to watch everything everywhere all at once without crying uncontrollably. btw.
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afishylife · 10 days ago
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thinkin about ocs (OIFIL) and ruining my own life with it u_u
#mostly thinkin about right before brent so hes super hostile and stuff but#how when he learns chris' full name and how chris doesnt like it bc of the constant HAHA THATS /FAIR/ jokes in school#and how he doesnt like his full first name christian and right is SO against his own first name and only wants to be addressed by his last#that he just decides whatever hes got enough annoyances with his name i can respect that#and thats how chris gets to just be chris - because right wants to be right#and he understands that more than anyone but then hes still an ass and still rude to people#and all he knows for a long while is chris is divorced and so when he hears about My Daughter the first time ? hes like ???#you have a baby? a new life? hey what? congrats dude! and chris is like i mean shes five but yeah#and right knows it makes sense that they arent actually friendly enough to talk about families and lives out of work#but still hes been working with chris for literal years and how much of an ass HAS he been that he never knew the man had a daughter#and chris very confused as to why right is so interested suddenly bc mr vulgar jerk of a guy is suddenly the most calm and peaceful looking#that chris has ever seen and its bc he heard about angel and when chris jokes about bringing her by to meet him if hes so curious#he doesnt expect the genuine hope when right asks him really? so oops guess he has to pray for a decent outcome#and seeing right act absolutely normal and civil to his daughter when hes so used to grouching and cussing#makes chris feel a bit warm! like hey theres hope for him!! hes not irredeemable after all maybe possibly!#and ofc thats slightly tainted when his beloved sweet angel says she wants to marry mr right because hey no actually not enough redemption#but right and chris talking about absolutely nothing and it evolves into chris prodding a bit into the whole you do well with kids thing#and right looks at him and is like kids are fucking wonderful dude its the adults that fuck em up#why would i be mean to a kid? what do they know?? they havent done anything wrong that cant be fixed#and chris just flabbergasted at the weird honesty and ok maybe hes too harsh on rights personality (hes not)#but then skip ahead to after brent shows up and you have right soften a bit and be more approachable and more willing to talk#and chris is so happy for him but also really wary of brent bc based on his years of working with right he knows the guy has had it rough#so he doesnt want right to be hurt more than he already clearly has been hurt and so hes gotta try to protect him#so he intervenes some days when one of the two are upset#and is like listen youre both adults you have to talk this out and be reasonable#and both are like wait what why me ?? i have done NOTHING wrong here#though right is more like i understand the accusation and respect it but im innocent this time i have been NICE#bc if anyone can call right out - he will allow it for chris
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gumiiiiezzzz · 8 months ago
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* ੈ✩‧₊˚ oops! smau
summary: the 1st and 2nd year boys accidentally confess they like you (fellow student)!!!
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warnings: f!reader, sfw, yuta’s convo is slightly suggestive, fluff/crack!, kys jokes
includes: toge inumaki, megumi fushiguro, yuji itadori, and yuta okkotsu * ੈ✩‧₊˚
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* ੈ✩‧₊˚ my first ever smau post hehe! lmk if you guys liked or have any suggestions :P
* ੈ✩‧₊˚ inumaki being chronically online just… is one of the best jjk fanon tropes of all time ngl
* ੈ✩‧₊˚ submit requests! (if u want)! please! and thank u! 🫡
* ੈ✩‧₊˚ art creds and spilled frustrations ab ai art below line LMAO
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* ੈ✩‧₊˚ link to header art: https://pin.it/mKP2o2S95
* ੈ✩‧₊˚ yuji pfp art: @11101AM on twt; megumi pfp art: FUCKING AI (i’ll change it for next time, im a boomer i GUESS i didnt realize how much of this was ai art im- 😐); toge pfp art: jujutsu kaisen anime heh; yuta pfp art: @zec3x on insta
* ੈ✩‧₊˚ i think the header is also ai generated ugh :/ i could not find the artist ANYWHERE but if anyone knows lmk i will give credit!!!!!
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fenriskisser · 11 months ago
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i should make a chart of which f/os would not understand the disorder part of sleep disorder and insistently try to fix my sleep schedule & which ones would just insist on sleeping w me / try to work around it
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ask-chivist · 1 year ago
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I would say 'not to overshare', but this is tumblr. It's what we do here, right?
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honeyvenommusic · 1 year ago
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me back on my semi-yearly watching of drumeo vids for fun (anguish) shit specifically "______'s drummer hears ______ for the 1st time" and GOdD ALL I WANT IS TO HAVE A REAL KIT AND LEARRRRRRN IT LOOKS SO GREAT AND FUN AND I FEEL VERY CONNECTED TO IT IN A WAY I CAN'T DESCRIBE WHENEVER I WATCH SOMEONE PLAY 😭😭😭😭
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ironunderstands · 1 year ago
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I made a bet with a couple of my friends that when I turn 18 I’m going to go to a doctor and try and get a diagnosis for autism because literally everyone close to me besides my parents (denial both my mother and my father have traits of it too 😭) think I have it. We’re each going to bet ~100, if I have it they earn 50 each if I don’t I earn 200. Or a secret third diagnosis. We shall see in 2 years.
Tbh the peace of mind from a confirmation (or lack of a one) means more than the actual diagnoses to me.
Either way I’m richer and I don’t have autism or I lost money but I can finally make the acoustic jokes without getting mobbed (which is deserved if you don’t have autism in my opinion as stereotypes are not fun 🤩).
I’m not gonna bother to convince my parents because once my dad believes something changing his mind is almost impossible (he’s usually right though so it’s not that frustrating). Annoyingly, my mom’s perception of autism seems to consist of Sheldon from big bang theory and people who aren’t that good at/don’t feel like it/ can’t mask their autistic traits. To be fair to her and my dad both, are doctors who work in intensive fields so they don’t have the time or energy to notice people who fly under the radar. I’d say I act a lot more like Donnie from the new TMNT with the crippling feeling of being constantly perceived by others. Also, I really don’t feel like making an entire PowerPoint presentation explaining to them more in depth what autism is or having this same frustrating and quite frankly embarrassing conversation again so it will happen on my own terms. The thing is even if I don’t end up having it I know I will still share a lot of traits with autistic people, and if I do it will help others understand me better which is nice . Sometimes I feel like the diagnoses that have to do with people’s mental state are more for the people in the patients lives than the patient themselves.
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suiana · 5 months ago
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imagine rejecting a yandere! god and he gets all mad and petty so he curses your love life
so maybe you used to be a cleric or something that worshipped him and he decided to be silly and come down to earth in a more human form (still godly but less flamboyant). he was bored and what better thing to do than to meet up with his worshippers? especially you, his most devout and sweet little thing?
of course, he eventually fell for you and confessed his feelings. you're just so captivating after all.
"hey i really like you-"
"sorry, i am only meant for my lord and saviour☺️ we can still be friends."
"oh... that's not..."
yeah, he kinda forgot that you think he's joking about him being your god and stuff... oops...
whatever! you should've accepted him anyway! you'd break your vows for him wouldn't you?! apparently not.
yeah, so he decided to curse your love life becase he's petty like that and you wouldn't give him that time of day. wouldn't even entertain his delusions for a bit smh. how could you just leave a literal god heartbroken like that?
and just like that, your first life as a devout worshipper came to an end.
your next few lives were... rather tragic too.
all your lovers would randomly die, disappear, or leave just when things were getting good. it was infuriating and you were starting to think that the gods had something against you. well, more like a god had a thing for you but who cares right?
meanwhile, your petty and childish god was just watching over you from his abode. he really likes watching you. no, he's not a stalker. he's a god. there's a difference okayn gods can watch over humans like this! what? creepy? no he's not creepy! don't call him that!
he... also probably has a shrine and collection full of things from all your lives or something tbh. and no! it's mot creepy!
in any case, he didn't interfere in any of your lives directly up until your current life.
when you suddenly showed an interest in him again.
yes, after your first life you had also forgotten all about him. no, it wasn't a part of the curse he laid on you. it was probably just your soul getting revenge on him for cursing you. or... maybe it was because you were human. duh. unfortunately, your god has a peanut sized brain.
in your current life while reading on about mythology for your studies, you started gaining interest in him again.
"huh... god of... mischief? sounds like a real troublemaker."
you immediately moved on to another god after that.
and the god lets out an audible gasp.
how could you be so cruel? not even a, oh he was hot or something like that? just a simple he was a troublemaker???
also, he was not a troublemaker!
sure he might've meddled with your romantic partners and cursed your love life... and also caused some major disagreements in human history... but that's just a little bit of tomfoolery! a little bit of trolling if you will!
ugh! he's seriously getting mad again!
guess he'll have to come back to meet you in person to show you he means business this time.
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whipped-for-kpop-fics · 6 months ago
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Life's A Beach - K.MG
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🌊Who: Kim Mingyu (Seventeen) x female reader 🌊What: Smut, some fluff I guess? Strangers to lovers. Lifeguard Mingyu!!! 🌊Wordcount: 7.3k 🌊Warnings: Profanity. Quick joke about burying a body on the beach. Slight drowning, it’s not graphic and it’s very quick all in all. Passing mention of panic. Probably excessive use of “baby”. Semi-public sex, oral (female receiving), fingering, big dick Mingyu, unprotected sex, multiple orgasms(f), messy Mingyu, choking, a single solitary spank, mentions of bruising. 
Summary: You don’t like the beach, but you do like the handsome lifeguard who works there. As it turns out, he likes you too and is more than willing to risk his job to have you.
Minors do NOT interact, which means reblogging and/or commenting on this story. I WILL block any account that interacts without an age indicator in their bio.
-2024 Masterlist-
A/N- Happy birthday to my beanie @ourdawnishotterthanourday , I know I said this was to prepare for a Christmas gift but I lied hehe oops. Hope you like it, my love 💗
Thank you @okiedokrie for the very last minute beta! 💕
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A few weeks ago, your best friend managed to succeed in convincing you to go to the beach after some very effective emotional manipulation in the form of puppy eyes and pouting at you. She had promised you’d enjoy yourself and admittedly, you did, but not because of the beach itself. Still, she used your enjoyment to convince you to return a few days later, and then another few more and soon enough the two of you seem to spend more time at the beach than your homes in your free time.
Now, the reason for your interest in attending the sand and seas despite liking neither of those things is pretty simple. The eye candy. One particular hunk of a man with a sweet smile, in particular.
You have no idea what his name is, you’ve never spoken to him nor been in close proximity but that doesn’t deter you from setting up in that same spot under the parasol for a few hours every few days at roughly the same time just to watch Mr Hunky Lifeguard do his rounds strolling topless up and down the sand and helping where he can. 
It’s sweet, the way he’ll help anyone who asks, even with matters you’re very certain are not a part of his job description. Judging impromptu sandcastle contests between kids. Blowing up beach balls. Helping older folk set up their beach chairs and parasols. 
You can’t help but wonder if he’d help you apply sunscreen. His warm hands slipping over your thighs, working up and up and-
“Hey!” The voice of your best friend breaks you from your fantasies as she skips over happily, hands cupped and before she’s even close enough, you already know what’s in her hands. “Check this out!” She drops onto her knees at your side to proudly show you…a little crab. So not another shell to add to the pile gathering on the sand to your right as you assumed. 
“A crab,” 
“Yes,” 
“I thought you were looking for shells to decorate your castle with?” You both look over at the half-finished and admittedly, rather grand, sandcastle a little to the side, safely out of the way from any passerby. 
“Every castle needs a King, don’t you think he’ll look crabulous on his throne?” You look back at your best friend to find her grinning at you, proud of her joke. 
“Go find shells.” You deadpan, she just giggles and gets up to return to the rockpool where she had found the crab to return it to its home.
Thoroughly distracted from your fantasies of the hot lifeguard, you have honestly forgotten about it and also happened to have lost track of him. Last you saw him, he was up on the deck of the watch tower, peering over the beach through binoculars yet now, he’s nowhere to be seen.
With a disappointed sigh, you decide to just relax, leaning back against the bags you’ve piled up to create an impromptu backrest and go back to reading your book. 
It’s not even ten minutes later when a figure blocks your light and casts a shadow over your pages. You immediately assume it’s your friend from the way the figure lingers and lift your head with every intention of accepting whatever funky patterned rock or shell she’s found this time, yet it’s not her who you spot, but Mr Hunky Lifeguard himself. 
“Hi,” he greets, hands on his hips and smiling at you in that bright friendly way you’ve noticed him smiling at everyone else. 
You take the moment with him so close to quickly rake your hidden gaze over his exposed, sunkissed, toned torso and arms. Praise be to whoever invented dark sunglasses. “Hello.”
“Family day out?” He questions, motioning to the pile of plastic beach toys by the sandcastle on your right, causing you to look over and only then realise how it must look; that you’re here with your child, not your grown ass adult of a best friend. 
“Not exactly,” You huff a laugh and lean aside a little to peer around him. “My best friend.” You declare upon spotting said person and pointing to her. To your surprise, she’s squatting with another lifeguard, this one wearing the same red shorts though he’s got a white sleeveless t-shirt on, and rummaging through the sand with your friend. 
“Oh,” The man in front of you lets out a surprised little laugh when he looks over too. “I’ve never seen Vernon interact like that with a stranger. Unless they know each other?” 
“Not that I’m aware of,” You shrug and look back up at the tall man in time to see his body angle back around to give you his full attention. You briefly wonder who exactly is looking over this section of the beach when both lifeguards are currently distracted on the sand. 
“Huh, okay. I’m Mingyu,” He takes a step closer to lean over and offers his hand to you. Your gaze catches on the chain around his neck and the way it swings as he leans over. You want to reach out and grab it, yank him down and defile the beach together. 
But that would get you arrested and you really don’t want that. So you lean up onto your knees to accept his hand to shake and tell him your name in return. 
“Mm, pretty,” He hums, looking at you over the top of his dark sunglasses with a lopsided little smile. It feels flirty as fuck, but you don’t want to make assumptions that this beautiful man is interested in you. 
“Oh, thank you.” You smile a little and take your hand back yet remain on your knees, feet tucked comfortably under you as he straightens up. You can’t help but think about the fact that if he was a few feet closer, you’d be face height with his dick and within reaching distance. 
“You must really like the beach.” 
“Huh?” You blink away the fantasy of slobbering all over Mingyu’s cock and seeing how pretty he looks when he cums down your throat, or maybe on your face, that’d be nice too. 
“I said you must really like the beach, I’ve seen you here almost every day for almost a month now.” 
“You noticed me?” You mutter in shock. 
“Uhm-” Mingyu rubs the back of his neck awkwardly, his confident stance melting away as his shoulders curve in and make him appear smaller. Embarrassed. Cute. “I-It’s my job. To notice things. People. You know. To ma-make sure people are safe.” 
“I see.” You hum and tilt your head a little without even noticing, amused and endeared by him. 
As if he isn’t already attractive enough just by existing, talking to him and realising he’s got this cute shy side definitely draws you in further.
“Y-yep!” He laughs awkwardly and straightens to his full height again while putting his hands on his hips again. “Well, I should get back to it. Nice to meet you!” And then he rushes off before you can even respond, leaving you watching him scuttle off and almost trip over a stray sandal in the sand making you snicker. 
Mingyu flails to right himself and then immediately looks over at you to see if you noticed. Realising that you had definitely seen him almost faceplant the sand, he gives an awkward embarrassed little wave before turning and rushing off, quickly putting his face in his palms as he goes.
And just like that, the beach gets that much more interesting.
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It’s a handful of days before you return to the beach, you had been busy with work, unfortunately, so you simply hadn’t had the time or energy to take the trip.
“I’m gonna dig a giant fucking hole today.” Your best friend declares as you both put down your items in your usual spot and start to set up. 
“To bury me? Work killed me, babe.” You retort dramatically.
“Please don’t bury bodies on the beach.” The voice makes you jump over and to your surprise, a dripping wet Mingyu is standing a little behind you. “Hi,” 
“Hi,” You reply dumbly, doing your utmost to not oogle his shimmering chest, or the flex of his bicep as he lifts a hand to run his fingers through his wet hair to stop the salty water dripping over his face. You’re once again very glad for tinted sunglasses. 
“You’re wet,” Your best friend comments, making you both look at her where she’s standing and looking between you both over the top of her sunglasses, where you’re very certain she’s lowered them down her nose just to give you both this very pointed look. 
“I was teaching a kid to swim, of course I’m wet.” Mingyu chuckles, motioning over his shoulder with his thumb in the direction of the sea behind him.
“Wasn’t talking to you.” Your best friend gives you a final look before pushing her sunglasses back up into place. “I’ll leave you to set up, I have places to be.” With that, she turns and walks off in the direction of the snack carts and shacks further down the beach leaving you and Mingyu alone. 
You appreciate that, the alone time with the attractive man, but what you don’t appreciate is having to set up on your own. “She could’ve at least opened the parasol first.” You mutter to yourself, looking at the giant umbrella in disdain. 
“I can help!” Mingyu offers, bounding forward before you can even answer, to pick up the umbrella from the sand, biceps flexing as he moves. “Where do you want it?” 
“Right here,” You reply without thought. He hums in understanding, even if he doesn’t truly understand because you were definitely thinking about where you want him to rail you when you answered, not where you want the parasol set up. 
Still, Mingyu sets the parasol up and it is in the right place so you find no reason to correct yourself and instead thank him and get to work setting up the mat. 
To your pleased surprise, Mingyu sticks around to help you finish setting up everything, making friendly conversation as he goes and smiling brighter every time he makes you laugh. 
You wish he would keep you company for longer but his walkie-talkie crackles to life and announces that he’s needed so he leaves you with a smile and waves at you when he looks over his shoulder after jogging a little away. 
It makes you feel all warm inside, how he seems to be genuinely interested in being near you, you just hope it doesn’t take another three weeks before he decides to make a move if he plans to. You’re not confident enough yourself to make that move, you’d be utterly mortified if you’ve read this all wrong and he’s just being a genuinely nice guy who goes above and beyond for his job. 
So you just settle down with a new book and hold that hope next to that sun shining in your chest.
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“This is perhaps the dumbest idea we’ve had and gone through with.” Your best friend comments as the two of you stand ankle-deep in the sea with the rented surfboards ready for your lesson with one of the two men who run the surf supply shack.
“You signed us up,” You point out, both of you watching the man in question as he removes his t-shirt on the shore to toss at his co-worker who rolls his eyes. 
You know the co-worker personally but more because he somehow knows your best friend. His name is Joshua and he, according to your bestie, had purposely set up this lesson with his co-worker, Seungcheol, because Joshua owes her for something or other. Honestly, you long ago stopped trying to keep track of the shenanigans of your bestie. Wisely too.
“Sorry about that, Shua had to tell me something.” Seungcheol apologises as he walks over to join you two, sans surfboard of his own, confusing you but you don’t point it out.
“Sounds ominous.” You declare.
“No,” He chuckles and motions to your best friend who points at herself with wide eyes, sunglasses propped on Joshua’s head so they don’t get lost to sea, while yours are with your belongings. “Shua said you have really bad balance so I should probably hold onto you.” 
“Terrible balance.” Your best friend agrees seriously without missing a beat, even if you know she’s lying at least a little. 
It takes everything in you to not burst into laughter. Clearly, Joshua is very aware that your bestie has been thirsting over his co-worker since she first saw him. Admittedly, you have been too but most of your attention has been on The Hunky Lifeguard now officially known as Mingyu.
“Okay, so is it okay if I hold onto you to help?” Seungcheol checks, expression giving away that he truly has no idea that this is some kind of a set-up and is genuinely just concerned for his student’s safety.
“Full consent to touch me however you want.” Your best friend agrees, making Seungcheol smile, entirely missing the depravity hiding in her words. 
You have to look away to take a few breaths to calm yourself before you break, and happen to notice Mingyu up on the watchtower deck, looking through his binoculars. You can’t be certain but it looks like he’s got them pointed in your direction. You don’t want to be delusional so convince yourself that even if he is, he’s not focused on you specifically. 
Spoiler, he definitely is.
“Alright,” Seungcheol claps his hands together, making you jump a little and turn back to him and catch his adorable gummy smile. “Let’s get this lesson started, shall we ladies?”
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Honestly, the lesson with Seungcheol goes a lot better than expected, he takes it very seriously and pays careful attention to you both. You hadn’t expected to get anywhere close to standing on the board in the water but with his careful guidance even with his hands hovering around your friend to aid her oh so terrible balance if need be, you get your feet under you. 
After a few more tries, you manage to get almost entirely upright while Seungcheol and your friend cheer you on supportively. 
And then you make a giant fucking mistake. 
Before you’re even upright, you lift your head just enough to peer around naturally and notice Mingyu in all his topless, red short glory jogging along the beach looking like everything out of a Baywatch themed porno with his pecs bouncing with fucking every step. And as if that’s not bad enough, the man clearly is packing something very special in his shorts because you notice that bouncing too. 
Next thing you know, you’re toppling into the water so suddenly that you inhale in shock a second before you hit the sea’s surface, allowing salty water to pour into your open mouth and trickle into your lungs. 
It’s barely a second that you’re under the water before a strong arm is around your waist and heaving you up into the air while you sputter, panic starting to seize your body. 
“Move!” You hear as you’re laid down on the sand by the strong arms, though the voice is coming from elsewhere.
“I can handle this, Gyu,” This voice is right over you, the owner of the arms and you vaguely register it as Seungcheol, but you’re too busy coughing up seawater to open your eyes or give him or the other any attention.
“I’ve got it, Cheol.” Mingyu assures. 
There’s a heavy sigh and then those strong hands leave your body and you feel Seungcheol back away while other hands touch you gently, helping to remain on your side. 
“That’s it, you’re okay, I’ve got you.” Mingyu’s voice is soft and soothing where he’s hovering over you in concern, one hand rubbing over your arm and the other pushing your hair back. 
Luckily, the whole ordeal only lasts a handful of minutes and then you’re okay, breath stuttered and throat a little sore but fine otherwise. 
When you roll onto your back and open your eyes, you find Mingyu right there, leaning over you and backlit by the sun he’s purposely blocking from shining right in your eyes. Like your own personal guardian angel. Or something more poetic. 
You can be given a break from being unable to wax poetry about this beautiful specimen of humanity before you, considering what you’re going through. And no, not the just inhaling seawater thing. 
But the whole, he’s leaning over you topless with that damn silver chain dangling inches from your face, thing. Just a little closer and you could bite it. 
You wonder if he’d find that weird. Probably. You still want to do it though.
“Hey,” He gives you a tender kind of smile when you lift your eyes from his chain to meet his relieved, soft gaze. “You okay?” You just nod, pretty sure you’d say something highly inappropriate if you open your mouth.
“I dunno, I think she might need you to watch over her, Mr Lifeguard.” Your best friend speaks up. You peer at her from the corner of your eyes and find her standing beside Seungcheol with a little smirk on her face as she looks between you and Mingyu. “Maybe you should take her up to the watchtower and keep a close eye on her, just in case.” 
“She doesn’t need that,” Seungcheol points out simply, definitely unaware that your friend is trying to set up a situation for you and the man you’ve been thirsting over for weeks.
“No, no, she’s right.” Mingyu argues quickly as he shakes his head and turns to you to help you sit up and then get to your feet to stand with him. “I should definitely keep a close eye on her, she almost drowned, Cheol-” 
“She’s fine,” Seungcheol’s mutter is neither heard nor considered as Mingyu continues to talk over him as if the man said nothing. 
“So I’ll take her to the watch tower for a while until she’s feeling all better, sounds okay?” He looks at you. You just nod.
“Make her feel all better, Mr Lifeguard.” Your bestie encourages with a nod and thumbs up. 
Mingyu returns it and you’re not certain he actually gets what your friend is insinuating but you don’t really care. Whether he understands or not, you’re getting alone time with Mingyu and that’s all that matters. Bless your bestie for always trying to get you laid.
As you walk up the stairs to the watchtower, Mingyu walks a few steps behind you, a hand on your lower back gently, the same place it has been since the two of you started to walk across the sand. It’s still there when he opens the door and you two enter the building. 
“Hey,” Vernon, the lifeguard your bestie apparently befriended the other day, greets looking over from where he’s sitting at the control desk facing the large windows that oversee the beach. “Oh,” He mutters, eyes widening a little as he looks between you and Mingyu, clearly taking in the sight of the tall man’s hand on your back. “You know, I think I’m going to go get some air for a bit.” 
“Okay,” Mingyu agrees, giving Vernon a grateful look as the shorter man vacates the building without even grabbing his walkie-talkie from the desk. 
At Mingyu’s gentle nudge, you move further into the building allowing him to shut the door.
“I’ll grab you a towel.” He declares, moving over to the cupboards while you decide to check out the view from the window. 
From here you can see the entire section of the beach, especially when you pick up the binoculars Vernon left on the desk and peer through them. It’s pretty interesting, being able to watch over everyone like that and see everything while they no doubt don’t even consider the eyes on them from above. 
“Can they see us?” You wonder, lowering the binoculars to look at Mingyu as he approaches with a towel in hand. 
“I mean sure, if they try hard enough at other times of day but the sun is in the right position to just reflect on the glass at the moment. So right now, no, nobody can see us.” He informs, stopping perhaps a little closer than necessary. Paired with the information that nobody would even see if he fucked you right against the window, well heat flares in your stomach.
“Have you tested that?” 
“Mm, a few times.” 
“How?” 
Mingyu tilts his head a little at you and as you haven’t accepted the towel, too focused on the conversation, he puts it down on the desk and gently takes the binoculars from your hands to also put down. “What do you mean, how? By looking up from outside.” 
“Right.” You hum and turn your head to look back out of the window.
“What were you expecting?” He chuckles lowly. You feel him move a little closer, close enough that you can feel the heat radiating from his bare chest. “Hm?” You shrug. “Tell me,” 
“Just…you know.” You shrug again and although you can barely feel it through the wet material of the rash guard on your torso, the gentle press of his fingers on your back makes you shiver a little. 
“You should get out of this and dry off.” He suggests while running his hand up the length of your back and around your neck to the zipper in the middle of your throat. 
“I might need some help getting it off.” You reply. “Things being wet makes things harder.” 
“Oh, I know.” You’re very certain that you’re both talking in double entendre now and look at him over your shoulder as you turn your back to him a little more to give him better access.
For a weighted moment, nothing happens, just heavy eye contact as if you’re both waiting for the other to take a step backwards and prove your suspicions of the rising tension between you to be false. 
Yet you both stay in place.
You feel a slight tug against your neck, barely noticeable but it makes your body burn a little hotter as he slowly tugs down the zipper to your clavicle before stopping.
“Face me.” He mutters, adjusting his own stance to fully face you. You immediately comply and turn so you’re face to face, all without him removing his grip on the pull of your zipper. 
Then he’s back to dragging the zip down, over your breasts where his knuckles brush a little making your breath catch before his hand moves on to finish the path to open the zip all the way to where it stops at your belly button.
Mingyu only then breaks eye contact to look down at the glimpse of skin he can see now with the zipper open. “This is a one piece?” He checks, noticing how the material of the rashguard vanishes into your shorts. You hum in confirmation and then he’s lowering to his knees in front of you to tuck his fingers into the waistband of your shorts. 
He glances up at you, checking that this is okay and when you nod, he gives you a little smile before turning his full attention back down to watch the shorts move down your thighs with the help of his hands.
“Can you-” He starts once you’ve stepped out of the shorts and he’s tossed them aside, but when he looks up at you, you’re already working on pulling the front of your rash guard open, revealing your chest little by little, covered only by the little bikini you bought specifically to wear with the rashguard. “That.” Mingyu swallows thickly, watching more skin get revealed until you start to struggle to get the wet material down your shoulders. 
Without a word, Mingyu gets up onto his knees as tall as he can without getting up to reach out and grip the material to ease it over your shoulders and down your arms. 
“You’re beautiful,” He murmurs, hands bunching the wet material by your hips as he stops to take in all the exposed skin only a few feet from his face.
“So’re you,” You reply shyly. He smiles up at you then leans forward to press a featherlight kiss to your stomach. 
“This okay?” He asked in between kisses on your skin, each growing more daring than the last.
“Y-yeah,” You agree, feeling breathless already and nothing has happened yet. The tension is just so thick between you that it fills your lungs and takes up space usually reserved for oxygen. 
For a moment, you worry that if you’re this breathless already with just a couple of kisses to your stomach, you will not survive actually being fucked by this beautiful man. But then his lips are suddenly on the crease of your thigh, right at the edge of the rash guard and moving inwards and you can no longer worry about the future state of your lungs. 
Mingyu quickly tugs the rashguard off of you entirely and tosses it aside carelessly once you’ve stepped out of it, leaving you in just the skimpy little bikini that leaves very little to the imagination. “Fuck,” He breathes out, leaning back to take you in from head to toe then back again. “So fucking beautiful, baby.” 
“Mingyu,” Your voice is a soft little plea as you reach towards him, for what exactly, you’re not sure, you just want something and hope he gets the hint. He does and tilts forward to lean his cheek against your palm for a second, then plants a kiss there, tender despite the heavy moment.
“Lean back, baby,” He encourages, leading you by your hips to turn and take a step back until the edge of the desk is digging into the meat of your ass. 
You grip the desk edge on either side of you as he hitches one of your legs up onto his shoulder then leans as his free hand tugs aside the seat of your panties to allow him to get straight to work dragging his tongue up your pussy. 
The noise Mingyu lets out overpowers your own, he sounds like he’s tasted the fucking nectar of the gods or something equally as divine. Hearing him so immediately into eating your pussy only makes you more aroused and attracted to him in general. 
You have heard of men eating pussy like a man starved before but you had never experienced it until now. Mingyu truly gives it his all, holds you open and drags his tongue and lips over you with desperation and an intensity that has your legs shaking and a constant stream of moans spilling from your mouth almost in time with the grunts and needy moans vibrating through his lips against you.
“Gyu,” You breathe out, tangling the fingers of one hand in his hair and encouraging him to stay on your clit. He groans at the slight tug on his scalp and redoubles his efforts, sucking and licking at your clit hungrily. 
Your eyes are closed, entirely absorbed in the toe-curling sensations this man is giving you in spades, but when his hand touches yours on his head, you open your eyes to peer at him curiously. He’s looking at you, eyes so blown with arousal that you’re very certain you leak over his chin even more. 
Mingyu doesn’t stop suckling your clit between his lips in a steady pattern that has you so fucking close to a beautiful climax. It won’t be long until you fall over the edge into bliss. 
He removes your hand from his head and directs it between your thighs to make you curl your fingers around the seat of your bikini bottoms to hold them aside and away from his face. 
Then those same fingers that had just curled your own are prodding at your entrance. He hesitates though, staring up at you for permission until you rapidly nod and then he’s plunging two right into you, made easy from how fucking wet you are.
Just like that, an orgasm hits you so suddenly and powerfully that you don’t manage to do anything, no warning, no sound from your mouth as it rushes through your body, making your eyes roll back and back arch.
Mingyu feels you clamp down around his fingers and groans deeply as his own eyes threaten to roll back despite not being close to orgasm himself. Just knowing you’re cumming because of him, because of his mouth, on his fingers, it drives him insane and makes his cock throb.
Diligently, Mingyu works you through the pleasure pulsing through you, slowing down when your hips start to twitch and then reluctantly detaching his mouth from your clit when you nudge his head with a slightly shaky hand. 
Though he doesn’t go far and instead pushes your thigh a little further open to give his head more space to get next to his hand between your thighs and noisily slurp up every single drop that spills from your pussy. He even goes as far as to lick up the line that dribbled down his hand to his wrist.
“Gyu,” The call of his name makes him lift his head to look at you with wide eyes, looking so innocent despite his mouth and chin being soaked in your juices, all the way down to his throat. The sight and reminder of how hard he just made you cum has you unintentionally squeezing around the fingers still buried to the knuckles within you. 
He groans, tilting forward and opening his mouth ready to make you see stars all over again but you quickly put your hand to his head, palm to his forehead to hold him back. “Lemme eat your pussy, baby, prettiest pussy I’ve ever seen. Most delicious pussy ever. Could eat you forever. Let me. Please?” He’s got a slight slur to his words as he speaks, voice pitched higher than normal as he begs in a tone verging on a whine. 
“D-don’t you want to fuck me?” You ask, words a slight pant still, too soon from the intense orgasm to have your breath back but you don’t care. He can steal all the breath from your lungs so long as he makes you cum like that. 
“Fuck you?” He repeats dumbly. You nod and then it’s like a switch has been flipped. All of the innocent pussy-drunk expression and voice vanishes in an instant as his eyes turn heavy-lidded and his lips turn up into a smirk. “Yeah? Want me to fuck you, sweetheart?” His fingers in you start to move, making you jolt a little in surprise and reach down to try and remove them. “No no no, you gotta take my fingers first, baby. Need to show me you can take them before I give you my cock, okay? This is such a pretty pussy, I don’t want to ruin it by giving you my cock before you’re ready.” 
You can’t really say anything in response, both from his words and the way he’s skillfully moving those two fingers in you, slow but pressing in all the right ways to stretch you out and drag all ability to form anything but pathetic moans from your parted lips. 
“That’s it, good, just take it. You can take it for me, right, baby?” You nod quickly at his words. “Can you take another finger?” Another nod so he pulls his fingers out most of the way to work a third in beside them. “That’s my girl, fuck.” He breathes out, watching the way your pussy opens around his fingers as he carefully feeds the digits into you. 
It doesn’t take much longer for Mingyu to pull his fingers out of you and get up to his feet. You barely have time to react before he has your hips in his hands and spins you to face the window. The sun is right in your face like this, lessened in power by the window yet still an annoyance so you lean over all the way down onto your elbows and rest your forehead on your forearms.
“Oh,” Mingyu breathes out, watching you bend over the desk and stops his task of shoving down his swimming shorts to free his leaking cock. “Fucking perfect.” He approves and gives you a quick spank to watch your asscheek wobble with the impact. 
He hadn’t expected the moan that tumbles from your lips and pauses for a moment as he considers spanking you until your ass is raw and there are imprints of his hands left on your skin like a claim. 
But then his cock twitches desperately and he gets back to work shoving his shorts down enough and taking his thick, heavy cock into his hand to run his hand up and down the length, spreading precum over his heated skin while his free hand tugs your bikini bottoms aside.
A breathless curse spills from his lips when he aligns his cock with your dripping hole, he wants to bury himself to the hilt in your warmth right away but he’s very aware that frankly put, he has a giant cock, so he needs to take it slow to not hurt you.
As soon as the head pops into you, you’re moaning and trying to push back for more. Mingyu has to take a firm hold of your ass cheek and push you forward against the edge of the desk to stop you moving too fast. If you keep it up, he will fuck into you without hesitation and he’s already trembling with the effort of holding back.
Little does he know, you want him to fucking ruin you. You want him to fuck you so hard and deep that you can’t take a step for the next few days without thinking of his cock splitting you open.
But you don’t have the brain power to make your tongue move to form that specific string of syllables so you’re forced to just remain pinned to the desk as he feeds you inch by thick inch of his cock at an almost agonisingly slow pace.
But the time his hips are pressed up against your ass, he’s shaking with his eyes squeezed tightly closed and both hands gripping your hips so tightly you just know there will be bruises in the shape of his fingers afterwards. Bruises you’ll wear proudly. 
“Fuck, baby, this fucking pussy,” He groans as you pulsate around his throbbing length. 
He needs a moment, needs more than one really, with how fucking close he is already to filling you with his cum but you press back against him as best as you can considering his grip. It’s barely any movement but he gets the hint, you really don’t want him to wait anymore and fuck, neither does he.
Mingyu slowly pulls his hips back, sliding half of his length out of you before sliding back in in the same slow, careful manner. He’s testing the waters, the give of your pussy and his own resolve, really. And all three give so fucking easily that the next time he pulls out, it's all the way until only his tip is tucked up safely inside of you before he thrusts forward harshly making you cry out and scramble to brace a palm against the window above your head blindly. 
“That’s it, hold on, baby,” He encourages with a heavy exhale as he adjusts his footing and hold on you before he starts to fuck you like a man possessed. 
It’s hard and fast and so fucking deep that he’s hitting places within you that you didn’t even fucking know exist before his cock found them. Or maybe they’re special places his cock is carving out and no one will ever be able to access them again. No one will make your mind blank and eyes roll back so far that all you see is the mental image of Mingyu’s giant cock wrecking your pussy in the best of ways.
You’re being loud, both of you, moaning and whining with every drag of his cock through your rapidly tightening walls. But neither of you cares, neither of you has the presence of mind to consider anything but the way it feels to fuck and be fucked like this. 
At this point, you’re so close to another incredible orgasm that you wouldn’t even care if the door opened, you probably wouldn’t even notice and honestly, neither would Mingyu. 
And when Mingyu tilts forward enough to wind a strong arm under your waist to press his palm against the flat of your chest to pull you up until your back is against his bare, sweat-dappled chest, you almost scream in pleasure at the new somehow deeper spot he’s grinding into.
There’s a little part of Mingyu that’s still aware that you’re in public and his place of work even if he’s not consciously aware of it, and that part of him is the reason his hand flies up from your chest to your throat and squeezes in the exact fucking way to cut off your airflow.
It’s the last nudge you need to hurtle into the single most mind-shattering, nirvana-inducing orgasm of your fucking life. At least so far because once you’re more coherent, you’ll definitely think about how much you want him to fuck you again in all sorts of ways.
A choked, cut off moan spills from Mingyu’s mouth as you clamp down around his cock so tightly as your pussy absolutely gushes around him that it sends him over too. His hand on your hip quickly moves, sliding around over your lower stomach to wrap his arm around your waist and hold you tight as he ruts into you and fills you with his cum. 
It feels fucking endless, the length of your orgasm and how much it takes out of you even though it truly doesn’t last that long. It’s just an all-encompassing feeling that feels like utter bliss, a neverending pulse of pleasure, pure fucking serenity.
“You okay?” Mingyu manages to breathe out once his cock has stopped twitching as your throbbing walls milk him for every drop of cum in his body. His chest is heaving against your back, matching the deep rise and fall of your own chest, even if he had released the pressure on your throat as soon as his cock had started to empty in you. 
You can’t respond yet, you’re not quite back on planet Earth making Mingyu chuckle a little, fond of you already, and cocky at his own abilities to fuck you so dumb like this. 
Carefully, he draws his hips back to slide out of you with a wince and hears the splatter of cum hitting the wooden boards. But that’s a problem for after he’s looked after you.
Mingyu is so fucking gentle as he grabs the towel from the desk and uses it to clean between your thighs as best as he can without removing his arm from around you to keep you propped up. 
Then he manoeuvres you onto the wooden chair on your right before getting to his knees to spread your legs wide once he’s between them with his knees pressed to the floorboards. For a few seconds, he just stares dumbly at the sight of his cum leaking out of your swollen pussy and he almost leans in to clean you up with his mouth but you’re already so out of it that he figures he better not. He’ll save that for next time. 
Fuck, he really fucking hopes there’s a next time.
You come back to reality when Mingyu is doing his best to slide your shorts back up your legs. 
“Hey, beautiful,” He greets you when he notices you moving slightly and looks up to see you blinking down at him. “How you feeling?” 
“Like I had the life fucked out of me.” You reply, giving him a sated, borderline dopey smile that makes him laugh. You reach out to him and he happily leans up to let you run your hands over his shoulders and to his neck so that you can tug him in and kiss him. 
He sighs in contentment as your lips move together slowly like you have all the time in the world. Like there’s nothing that either of you would rather be doing than this right here. 
“Should’ve kissed you earlier,” He murmurs when you both naturally pull apart for air and he rests his forehead against yours. “Sorry, got carried away.” 
“There’s no need to apologise, seriously, that was…” You trail off and just giggle instead, fingers playing with his hair near his nape. 
“It was.” He agrees with a chuckle and leans back to look at you. “Could we maybe do that again?” 
“Now?” You baulk.
“No, not now.” He giggles. “I really can’t do that again now, I think I’ll pass out if I try to do anything like that now.” He assures, squeezing your thighs a little where his hands lay. “But another day in the future, when we’ve both recovered.” 
“That sounds much more reasonable to me.” 
“Reasonable, huh?” He teases and nips at your cheek playfully making you giggle. “And what about a date? Does that sound reasonable to you?” 
“No.” Mingyu’s face drops so fast as he looks at you. He looks pretty heartbroken, honestly. “I didn’t mean no as in no to the date!” You rush to assure, cupping his cheeks and brushing your thumbs soothingly over his skin. 
He pouts and pushes into your hold. “Then what do you mean?” 
“Just that it doesn’t sound reasonable but very nice and something I would definitely love to do.” 
“Oh.” He turns into your palm to try and hide the cute happy little smile that lifts his mouth and exposes his teeth, but you feel it. He presses a kiss to your palm before facing you again, no longer hiding his smile. “Good, good, I’m glad you’d love to. I’d love to as well. Maybe after my shift ends we can get lunch? Well, we’d have to take Vernon too and I guess your friend but they can entertain each other at another table.” 
You giggle and nod in agreement. “Sounds perfect to me.” 
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drgnflyteabox · 20 days ago
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a little continuation of this. john price x cashier fem!reader. verbal abuse, anxiety, yelling, hurt/comfort, price comes to your retail rescue<3<3 1.4k words
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The only good part of a 5am wakeup is watching the sunrise slowly climb the sky.
There’s a quiet sort of tiredness that lets you appreciate it more — and though the lot associates have made a joke about the morning crew and their sunrise photos, there’s an element of truth there that’s both funny and a little beautiful.
It’s a drag to wait outside the doors for a manager to open them, trying not to make eye contact with the early-bird oldies and the impatient contractors who think they should just be allowed in before everyone else based on the amount of money they spend.
When the doors open and the 6am hardware warriors stroll in, ready and chipper, you’re half asleep leaning against your counter.
Another good thing about the early shift is the lack of uptight managers. None of them want to wake up before ten, so you’re safe to lean and lounge while waiting for customers.
A call comes through your earpiece after a few customers, nearing the cusp of 8am.
”Hey, we’ve got the guy coming your way,” your head cash – Lisa – says, voice crackling in the mic. The guy is a rude jerkoff, some contractor who thinks abusing staff is the way to get good service and better prices.
What’s worse is that your managers allow it. In fact, you get warnings like this all the time. The guy is here, the guy has a big order, make sure to cash him out fast or he’ll start shouting. Be pleasant. Smile.
The guy is walking down the store lumber aisle with a pinched expression on his face and two other employees dragging his stacked carts behind him.
You try to ignore his caustic vibes, thinking instead of the pink, purplish sunrise you’d seen earlier. Clouds like magic, cotton candy, floating above you 
You ignore the incessant tapping of his feet, the annoyed groan he makes when you lift a package of insulation up and find flat saw blades.
Sure, you can’t accuse him of stealing. But you can make a cheery, passive aggressive comment–
“Oops, I guess you forgot these!” you chirp, scanning them a little slower than necessary. It’s not mature, but it does make you feel a little better. Nice try, bozo.
Playing the idiot cashier helps with these types. Why are you mad, sir? I’m just a cashier? And though you could answer more questions than you do, you don’t. Playing the ditz makes life easy.
Lisa’s definitely judged you for it, but hey. She’s not stuck at the register like you are.
Sometimes, it works. You get a scowl, but they’ll go quiet. Sometimes.
Today, it backfires.
“Excuse me?” 
Oh here we go, you think. It’s way too early for this.
“What was that, sir?” you play dumb, voice squeaking.
“Are you accusing me of stealing?” his volume raises. You see redness crawling up his neck. Fuck.
“No, no, I only meant–” you try to backtrack. Fuck, fuck. This is the result of your hubris. Your reasoning flies out through the massive lumber area doors as his rage climbs.
“No? No? Because I think you just accused me of stealing. Do you understand how much I spend here, you moron?”
“I do, I didn’t mean to imply–”
“Get me a fucking manager, now,” he snaps. God, you have no clue if he acts like this to get his way, to get discounts, or if he’s really this angry half the time he comes in.
Regardless, the effect is real. You’ve never been good with anger, and you’re shaking a little as you press the call button on your pager.
“C-Can I please have a manager down to lumber cash?” you broadcast to the store.
All you can think of is looking away from his angry gaze while you wait. Oh, a bubble bath – you have an aloe and green tea bubble bath packet at home waiting for you.
Hot water. Bubble bath. Manager to fix this mess. Maybe a hot chocolate after work?
A couple minutes pass. Longest minutes of your life.
No answer. The guy taps his foot, sighing loudly, angrily. You try again.
“Can I please have a manager down to lumber cash?”
Oh fuck, is that someone else in line? You turn away bodily, speaking again into your mic. Trying to look like you’re doing something about the wait.
Another couple minutes. Despair washes over you like a cold blanket of snow.
“Need a manager at lumber cash,” you try.
Typical, really. Lisa is likely on break, and you have no idea who’s managing the store at the moment.
You imagine it’s likely Cody, who’s good with contractors like this because he's personable but he’s also lazy it almost cancels out. Also, he takes a smoke break every 5 minutes.
And never takes his pager.
“What the fuck is taking so long?” you hear behind you.
“I’m sorry,” you say, turning. “My manager is busy at the moment but–”
“Busy?” his voice is like a gunshot in the airy space, an absurd volume for the time.
“Yes–”
“Do you know–”
A third voice cuts in.
“Think you better learn a little patience, mate,” British?
Oh, shit. It’s that guy from before. He’s got one hip a little cocked, a frown on his face like he’s smelled something bad. His boonie hat is titled down, nearly covering his eyes. You can see them because you’re shorter than he is.
“Excuse me? And who are you? Mind your business,” the guy says.
“I think you’d better let the nice girl check me out while you wait,” he motions for you towards the parallel cash desk, and you’re grateful to just follow.
You scurry away from the guy faster than is appropriate, calling out again as you cross the open space towards the other cash desk for a manager.
You can only hope they arrive while you’re helping this one. John Price, you think his name was. He's a memorable man. Him and his moustache and his expensive company.
John Price has left the guy flabbergasted. He also has twice as many carts as him, and when your eyes widen to see them he just says take your time in a smooth, deep voice.
Oh man.
You do take your time, already calmer for John’s presence. Strange maybe to feel safe in the company of a stranger, a contractor no less, but it’s a nice change of pace.
Beep, beep. You scan methodically. John has no hidden items, and he doesn’t pressure you. He leans up against his lumber order and watches you check underneath things, under the cart, doing everything you’re trained to do.
“Start early?” he asks.
“Hm?” you lift your head. “Oh, yes. 6am.”
He whistles.
“Hard worker, I see,” he helps you lift a heavy bag of concrete.
“Thank you,” Marx look away, you think. Your face is only a little hot.
Cody strolls in the lumber doors missing his apron and – you guessed it – his pager. You fix him with a look as he smiles in greeting.
“Need a manager when you’re free,” you rush. Cody is nice, but you’re kinda miffed now.
“Oh, sure,” he says, walking by you toward the breakroom.
John Price raises a brow.
“Not everyone’s up to the task, eh?”
You feel hot again.
“It’s just early.”
John smiles. He looks remarkably silly doing it, you think. His facial hair makes him look approachable, cuddly. Like a teddy bear.
John’s order totals double the guy, which isn’t really a victory for you but it feels like one. Ha! See, you aren’t the richest guy here. You feel vindicated. Cody looks miserable cashing him out, which makes you just a little guilty.
“Will that be cash or card?” you ask, finger hovering on the POS.
He pays with card. You certainly do not notice how he cradles the machine. You aren’t that down bad.
Only you are, and his fingers are huge. His knuckles are hairy.
When you go to hand him the receipts, printed twice for record keeping, he manages to slip a 50 into your hand before you notice.
“Oh, no! I’m not allowed to–”
He folds those big bear paws over your hand, enclosing the cash in it with a sh sh sh as you protest.
“For the trouble,” he winks.
“You didn’t give me any trouble,” you try. The warmth of his palm, the roughness of his calluses. You’re a goner.
He chuckles, and you wonder how he can be both so intense and so disarming.
“You know what I mean, sweetheart,” he squeezes your hand, pushing it gently back towards you until you can put it in your apron pocket.
“Thank you,” you squeeze out.
“Don’t let him get to you,” he says.
“I’ll try,” you thank God or the universe or whoever that Cody and the guy finished a while ago.
“Attagirl.”
Yeah, you’re a goner.
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