#imagine finding out your mortal enemy from fourth grade not only doesn’t remember you but is THE GREEN NINJA agshdjdjkf

[un-pearable]

Chen anon. Oh same I love this terrible little guy sm already too. Lloyd reconnecting with like Brad and he’s like do remember some kid named Chen, he went there and he like hates me. Oh lloyd you don’t remember? You got both of you a fail in the name of evil. Huh. But Skylor asking kai for how to deal with new shitty little brother advice. Idk save him from a volcano? Me & Lloyd got really close after that

Also like movie Skylor & Chen where post defeating her dad she invites the ninja over to her house. Chens home too and theyre like what’re YOU doing here?! I live here? In this scenario it’s still secret identity stuff bc those shenanigans are so fun. Skylor has so much sibling bullying ammo with actually you make fun of the green ninja all the time but you don’t know it, unfortunately she doesn’t get to put it to use.

i think we’ve just created the world’s worst narrative foils. go team!! kai can’t take you anywhere lloyd

[wasabi-duck]

demigod jin

i wasn’t gonna start this au yet but y’all know i’ve been having a rough day and i should probably be taking more me time but i wanna write so i figured if i was gonna write well maybe i should do something i really excited about…

for everyone who has never read percy jackson, first of all, i demand that you read it because that series did a lot for me and it’s still one of my favorite book series and my happy places??

and secondly lemme help with the main idea

basically one of your parents is one of the greek gods, being a child of zeus, poseidon, or hades is really rare, monsters hunt you because you’re a half-blood, and lastly camp half-blood is a place where all the greek half-bloods can go and be protected from the monsters and all??     

so believe it or not, for this au, that’s right, you’re a demigod surprise!! i’m not gonna say who your godly parent is because that’s no fun, but here’s a list if you wanna read up on them and decide! tell me who it is when you come to a decision omg

anyway,,,

jin,,, i hate to be stereotypical but jin is the son of aphrodite, the goddess of love and beauty

ever since jin was a small boy he was dripping with good looks and people became constantly enamored with how good looking he was

his dad was a well known fashion designer back home, and so from a young age, jin was also dressed in the most popular and stylish of fashions

like imagine baby jin rocking some like scarves and suspenders and beanies and baby converse omg

and as a toddler he had the fake glasses and all??

because jin’s father is a well known fashion designer, aphrodite was immediately attracted to him

a lot of the gods have flings and they’re like wow you’re attractive, but as soon as the kid is born they kinda roll

partly from necessity too but like

aphrodite really really truly loved jin’s father and she wanted to settle down with baby jin and his father but zeus was like oh no you don’t you’re leaving that mortal right away if we can’t be with those we love, then neither can you

and so she tried her best to stay and visit when she could but by the time jin was like two, she was completely out of his life

jin’s dad did his best to raise his baby boy, he did, but he was always so overwhelmed and caught up in his work that most of the time, jin was cared for by his dad’s secretaries

and when he got old enough, jin really kept to himself

everyone was always intimidated by jin because wow the face of a god from such a young age, and child of the famous designer

that not many people, especially people his age, ever really took the time to talk to jin or get to know him for who he really was

all people seemed to care about was that jin was a pretty face

so a lot of people got the impression that jin was self absorbed and conceited but he really learned from an early age that the only thing people seemed to care about was his looks

okay but jin gets to camp half blood pretty late

i think the average age was around like twelve for rolling up in the camp but jin was fourteen

one of his dad’s older secretaries was actually one of aphrodite’s handmaidens and she always worked behind the scenes to make sure that no monsters harmed jin

but one day as jin was walking home from his preppy elite rich person school, some crazy demented hag monster lady came at him with a cane that looked much more like a sword when jin took the time to look and soon he was running for it down the streets of new york city

luckily the secretary was on her way to pick him up and she packed jin into her car and sped off

she had to quickly explain to jin what a half-blood was and what was chasing them and the entire world of the greek gods and goddesses was real and thriving

jin handled it pretty calmly at first??

he seemed pretty collected as the drove towards camp, because after a bit the monster stopped chasing them

when they finally reached the border of camp, jin hugged the secretary and kissed her head

“you know i always considered you my mom”

and she’s cheering up because she loved jin like her son but this is what’s best for him and she hugs him really tight before ushering him off

another key part of camp half blood is getting claimed by your godly parent

i read the books in fourth grade and so i might forget some of the details but from what i remember your parent claims you by flashing their emblem above your head or something?

it takes jin under a week to get claimed because his mom is like omg my fave son is here!!

she makes it really dramatic too because who would aphrodite be if she wasn’t a drama queen?

like it’s the friday night capture the flag game…

jin is standing with all the hermes kids because that’s where all the unclaimed kdis stay??

and chiron (the centaur dude who runs the camp) is dividing up the teams

and he’s about to call out aphrodite when there’s this flashing light

jin is just kinda standing there obliviously because capture the flag isn’t really his thing, he doesn’t like running around with his dagger and trying to slash people?? he much rather help some of the apollo kids tend to wounds and all??

so he doesn’t even realize the light is coming from above his head and everyone is staring at him

and he kinda defense mechanism “look i know i’m pretty but-”

“spoken like a true son of aphrodite”

and he’s like wait wha- OH OH OH

and he gets all blushy and everyone is cheering at the aphrodite cabin swarms him and pulls him into a group hug

fast forward a few years now

jin is the head of the aphrodite cabin

he’s like super blessed by aphrodite like not only is he super beautiful, but he’s realized he has the gift of charmspeak, which is basically like his voice is so potent that just by speaking, he can get people to do whatever he wants

his charmspeak isn’t the most powerful in the world, but he can still get yoongi, hoseok, namjoon, jimin, and tae to do whatever he wants

only jungkook is invincible to his power

jin is like a camp legend tbh

so obviously you know about him

but you’ve never really talked to him, not really

all of that changes

aphrodite is the goddess of love, need i remind you, and she’s gonna set jin up with you no matter what it takes

it’s the friday capture the game

finally jin found a part he can play

he stands in the buffer zone of the playing arena which is like basically the forest and he helps fix and adjust armor for people who need it

you’ve been running around in enemy territory and someone done bludgeoned you with the butt of their sword and your breastplate is dented and it actually hurts quite a bit

before the moron can hurt you again, you race off to the neutral zone, hoping someone can help you out

wow guess who’s standing there, it’s jin!!

you hurry over to him and start trying to pull the breast plate off but something hurts, badly

you wince and examine your arm only to realize there’s a pretty nasty gash and you’re like when did this-

jin clucks like a mother hen and without thinking grabs your arm to examine the wound

you try to jerk away but he gives you this look “there there, it’s okay, you’re not gonna be problematic are you?”

you kinda freeze and stare at him and it seems like suddenly you’re in a fog and you can’t get out of it?? like you’re in this dreamlike state and you don’t know where it came from but you feel like you’re out of body

but then you snap out of it and kinda-

“that stuff doesn’t work on me pretty boy”

jin’s eyebrows furrow and he purses his lips and you think he might be mad??

but then he starts with the wind shield wiper laugh and soon you’re giggling too??

it takes him like seven hours to catch his breath but when he does he introduces himself and you repeat the gesture and you kinda,,, kinda don’t wanna go back into the game now??

jin won’t let you either because he thinks you’re cute and he doesn’t wanna miss up in this,,, completely random,,, not staged by his mother,,, chance to meet you,,,

so he’s like yah i think you should sit out for a little bit these wounds look really serious

he knows that the apollo kids are supposed to handle this kind of thing but he needs an excuse-

he grabs some gauze and he dabs your wound with like his shirt or something because he’s dumb,,,

and then he wraps your wound but he does such a crappy job of it that the bandages are like five feet thick?? like it’s like there is a balloon on your arm or something…

and when he gets your breast plate off he doesn’t actually know what to do about it so he kinda just awkwardly sets it down on the ground

it’s my own headcanon that there are some old rusty high school bleachers in the middle of the woods for spectators and people who don’t wanna play and jin just kinda invites you over

you two chill on the bottom bleachers and you don’t ever go back into the game because jin is telling you some quality greek puns and you’re in hysterics over them

and even after the game ends you two decide that it’ll be fun to hang out

there’s like a wild camp bonfire after the game and instead of hanging with your cabin you plop down next to jin

the apollo kids are leading with some music and you kinda notice jin humming along and you realize like he has a really really pretty singing voice?

you find yourself tuning everyone out and just listening to him instead…

but then some of his friends stumble over and they look at you and they get these wicked smirks and they’re like ;)))

and jin snaps out of his trance and he starts stammering because yoongi and jungkook are very much interested in who you are

because jin never really talks to people outside bangtan or his cabin so they’re like wiggling their eyebrows

and jin is like omg nO stOp leaVE

and you’re all embarrassed too because maybe they walked over when you were casually leaning against jin’s shoulder…

you kinda excuse yourself and you’re like my cabin is calling my nAME

but the next day

you see jin at the dining hall and you wave and he waves back and after that he shyly comes over and asks if you wanna go to the arts and crafts cabin after breakfast

which you do

the crafts cabin never has a lot of people in it because everyone rather by climbing the lava rock wall or sparring but nah, jin likes the crafts cabin

he brings you in and he’s like

“see that huge tapestry?”

you nod

it really is huge

it’s a dark purple with gold embroidery around the edges and the picture on the  tapestry looks like a goddess up near the top holding a long red string in her hands…

down below is a boy sewn in holding one end of the string but the rest isn’t finished…

jin kinda gets all shy “that’s mine”

and you’re like !!!

because it’s usually the athena kids that make tapestries but this is probably one of the most intricate and detailed ones you’ve ever seen

you go over to inspect it and you’re like wow what aren’t you good at??

you two stay in the crafts cabin and he teaches you how to use the loom and you have to share the stool and he has to guide your hands with his hands and you can feel his breath on the back of your neck… amazing

the next day you suggest you guys hang out again but you’re like i get to pick what we do…

you take jin down to the sparring area and he’s like have you seen me,,, i don’t know how to hold my dagger, let alone use it

and you’re like nah it’ll be fine

you’re wrong

jin has a lot of potential, because he’s broad-shouldered and definitely built for defense

but boy lacks confidence and training because people always assume aphrodite kids don’t want to fight at all

so you’re like lemme help

so you show him how to set his shoulders and how to stand and where to put his weight

you teach him how to jab and slice and block and all of those things i learned from wind waker…

he’s really clumsy you realize??

like when he walks and talks he’s so graceful and godly and poised

but seeing him fight he’s like a chicken with its head cut off and you think it’s so so funny like honey…

he gets all defensive and red in the face and he tries to show you some rad moves and he ends up tripping and falling and scuffing his knees up and you’re like baby omg what it this

you have to go up to the infirmary cabin after that and hoseok is there, being his smiley son of apollo self…

he fixes jins knees up while making really exaggerated winks and smiles at you two

jin is like hoseok please

and hoseok is like hoseok yes

you kinda smile but you’re all blushy and shy and you kinda just give him a look but jin is too busy scolding hoseok to notice

you two do get a lot closer from that and you try your hardest to bring him out of his comfort zone and all the boys note that he’s so much more smiley and confident in his entire self, not just his looks

he i forget what i was gonna say

he gets much better at fighting though and you’re like so proud because you made this happen??

all the aphrodite kids ship you so so hard and whenever any of them see you they’re like hey honorary sister/brother in law and you’re like nO WAIT WHAT

and jin is like haha

i dont know what theyre talking about

haha

hahahaha

and he gets all red and his hands get all clammy and he’s like s/o to my mom for making me fall heads over heels in love,,,

and you’re like what was that jin

and he gets all !! nothing

and you’re kinda suspicious but whatever

you two flirt and get close and all but neither of you wanna convince because demigod things you know…

one day you’re chilling in your cabin and chiron is like yo i need you for a bit

and he drags you to the main cabin and he takes you upstairs and whatever and that’s where the oracle is??

and basically you get this long drawn out prophecy about appeasing hera’s wrath or something??

and you’re kinda in a daze or whatever

because you have never been on a quest before?? it’s always been a low key dream of yours? but you were like nah i would never ever be chosen because i am a small insignificant bean but-

but nah you’re being chosen?? right here right now??

you can;t focus for the rest of the day?/ all you can think about is packing for your quest and who to bring on your-

one answer is obvious to you and you’re like oh

oh

jin

jin is the only one you can think about bringing

usually a quest is three but it could be two…

and you’re all flustered and shy and your heart is racing because you can’t even begin to think about facing the dangers of the mortal world with jin

gotta protect him from ugly monsters

wouldn’t that be the dream?

you don’t wanna tell him right away though because you know he loves being at camp… and you don’t want him to risk his life for your dream

but the entire camp gets wind of your quest

and jungkook is the one to break it to jin and he’s like pal… buddy… guess what, guess who’s going on a quest

and jin is like omg my lill bean congrats!!

and jungkook is like lmao um no

it’s your loVER

and jin just pales and he takes a deep breath because that’s dangerous and risky and you will be unsafe and he will not have this??

without thinking about it twice, he runs to your cabin and barges in even though that’s not really allowed

you’re packing a small bag of everything you might need and jin just kinda stands there awkwardly

“were you gonna tell me?”

you stare up at him and you nod a bit and you open your mouth to speak but jin is rambling now

“look i know i’m not the best fighter and i’m not that tough or brave or resourceful or talented or whatever!but i’m going to protect you no  matter what, so you don’t have a say, you’re going to take me!!”

you smile and inhale sharply

you run into his arms and bury your face in his chest “that stuff doesn’t work on me pretty boy… remember??”

you two hug super tight and it’s really gentle and sweet and then someone walks in and suddenly it’s a lil awkward…

but yes, jin does go on your quest with yoU!! the two of you go together

and yes, he’s there to protect you every step of the way

from spiders, angry killer dandelions, furies, and crazy goddesses too!!

and if you ever get hurt, he’s there to kiss your boo boos better because he loves you

tbh from olympus, aphrodite is collecting bets because you two got together on your own...

[justastormie]

I’m doing two, because I can. 

Ancient Historical meme from my drafts;

First things first: What’s their name and when and where did they live? If there are any/ you have one, add your favourite picture of them. 

Erwin Johannes Eugene Rommel (1891-1944), Germany, lived around Württemberg for most of his life, the occasional world war aside. Of historical note for being a masterful tactician, writing an important book of military theory about wwi and commanding the german forces in the north african campaign of wwii. 

Napoleon (1769-1821), France technically but had a great deal of fun on camping trips all over Europe. Of historical note for one-uping Alexander the Great. Created landmark legal, military and social organizations. List of fuckups is longer than most people’s list of accomplishments. One of the most enduring military and political legends of the modern era. Bees.

1. How and when did you first hear about them?

Rommel- I honestly can’t remember. My father is a wwii nut so i was raised on the stuff. I got serious in my interest of him about 12/13 when I first read the collection of his papers translated into English. 

Napoleon- fourth grade (about ten years old). We had a section of world history, dismal though it was. In one of the little “fun facts” thing they had a tiny little box describing Nap’s return from Elba with an itty-bitty reproduction of Steben’s Returned From Elba. I thought that sounded like the most badass thing I had ever heard, and was also a little in disbelief because surely someone can’t just walk back and reclaim their kingdom. Like, that shit didn’t happen in real life. So I bought my first biography to find out the real story. 

2. What do you like most about them?

Rommel

he tempered his ambition and leadership with compassion and a fierce sense of honor

genuinely seems to have been a nice dude

he and his wife are cute as fuck 

was later cute as fuck about his son Manfred 

was incredibly clever

was a peach eating lunatic adventurer masquerading as a srs prussian soldier 

he was a romantic both in the age of chivalry sense and the modern sense

Napoleon

SUCH A BADASS, oh my god

was an over-invested mono-maniac at all times, which I can related to

incredibly capable in many fields

i have been napoleon and josephine trash since day one

crowning himself. i just love that moment.

was really smart. on a ‘holy shit’ level. (even if he did some massively stupid shit sometimes)

meritocratic promotion structures

hamilton WISHES he were this non-stop. 

never gave up, never gave in. even on st. helena he started dedicated his energies to preserving his legend and legacy, to great effect. 

3. Is there anything about them that makes you angry or that you don’t like at all?

Rommel 

literally worked for nazis

pretty sexist

there’s a lot i disagree with him about, but very few things that make me truly pissed off. ie he was of the period opinion that military men shouldn’t be involved in politics, as he thought that would mean the military as an organization would start defining germany’s political future which would turn into military rule and he was catagorically against that. which i think is both wrong and allowed him, and others in the german army, to disclaim responsibility for political shit they didn’t agree with that was being done by their government. but i can absolutely see where he was coming from, and i think his concerns were reasonable and legitimate. 

so yeah. a lot of disagreements, but very few things that just piss me off.

Napoleon

w h e r e   d o   I   b e g i n

allowed his obsession with legend and conquest overwhelm his moral values 

sold his honor and his moral principles in order to maintain power

frequently only took into account the human cost of warfare way too fucking late

rampant misogyny

really fucked over Junot

really fucked over tons and tons of people who were loyal to him, from close friends to the soldiers who followed him

got a truly staggering number of people killed on account of his own short-sighted obsessions

to paraphrase the old tv show Wiseguy, You don’t get to shove people around just because your fire burns brighter, no matter how brilliant that fire is. 

never gave up, never gave in. even when he fucking should have, looking at you reasonable peace terms of 1813. 

4. If you had one day with them in our present time - what would you do together?

Rommel - Aviation museum, he’d absolutely love it. I’d get him to pick some German place to eat and interrogate him ruthlessly about what inter-war rural Germany was like. 

Napoleon- Smack him repeatedly in the face for invading Spain  Walk and talk. Have him show me around Paris and have a debate over legal systems. Nerd out over Ossain. Show him a modern bookstore. Let him see how much of his work has survived into the present day. Shove him into at least one shrubbery.

5. What would you like to talk about with them?

Rommel - Engineering, aviation, dogs and funny army stories

Napoleon- All of the things. I can only imagine the conversation would be a pinball game of madness as to topics covered. And okay. I’d have to ask about Waterloo. I’d be that person. I don’t think he’d do it, but I’d love to hear him talk about Corsica. 

6. In which way do you identify most with them or a figure they created?

Rommel - He was an intensely practical man who tried very hard to do the right thing and frequently failed. I hope that one day I’ll have the strength of character to try to rectify my mistakes as he did his. 

Napoleon - I too am an over-invested, bossy weirdo. 

7. Thoughts about their death? E.g.:Was it too early, was it deserved, woud you have tried to prevent it and how? 

Rommel- oh god TOO EARLY, UNDESERVED, that poor brave bastard. I mean the fact that he was murdered because of his role in a plot to overthrow hitler and make peace with the allies is reason enough. would have definitely tried to prevent it, but would need like. the a-team to stop it. because you’d have to rescue not only rommel but his family that was being used as leverage against him. unless you’re allowed to go really far back and then i’d just start slapping the shit out of everyone at the versailles peace conference.

Napoleon - hoooo boy. uuuuuuuh. i mean. do i like it how he died? no. does that dislike come from a rational place? ...nooo. best case scenario for me would be he gets shot before the last charge of waterloo. hell if i had my way i’d go back and convince him what REALLY needed done was him personally leading the imperial guard up the hill. heroic, dramatic death and historians get to fight over wellsley actually beat napoleon for the rest of forever. europe also gets a break from napoleonic insanity. which doesn’t happen if napoleon gets to live. once more if you’re allowed further back, i slap the shit out of him before he invades Spain and point out that Ireland is lovely this time of year (it’d still be a clusterfuck, but less of one).

8. Is there a book or movie etc. you would recommend to someone who’s new to the person and would like to learn more about them?  

Rommel - The Rommel Papers is a good place to start, there are frequent letters to his wife but the content is primarily military. 

Napoleon - Shannon Selin’s website and book. The book is fiction but she is the lord our god in this fandom for her mad research skills. She provides sources for everything, which makes her the perfect jumping off point. (Now if I can just convince her that what she REALLY needs to do is write another book starring josephine) 

9. What can we learn from them? 

Rommel - when in doubt, bluff like a motherfucker right action is not a mystical, obvious thing at all times, we must do what we believe is right to the best of our abilities while being willing to let compassion guide us onto different paths.

Napoleon - 

human beings are capable of astonishing intellectual and physical feats, and the best of our stories can still be written, they are not confined to antiquity. 

find friends who will support your goals and then listen to their good advice even when it challenges your ego. 

if loud, bossy weirdos can find devoted friends and romantic partners than we’ve got a pretty good shot too.

don’t invade spain

propaganda is half the battle

love, in all its forms, is a resilient motherfucker

don’t interrupt your enemy when he’s making a mistake

strive to be so badass that hundreds of years later, the historical fiction that is all about fighting you has their characters become complete fanboys any time you actually show up (ft. Richard Sharpe in Down With The Tyrant But OMG Harper Look It’s Napoleon *SWOON*, hon. mention also goes to William “Why Aren’t I French” Laurence). 

a willingness to take charge is half the battle for power

bees are a cute fashion accessory and go with anything  

10. Would you want to be friends with them if they were still alive? 

Rommel - I think he’d be a good Dad Friend to have. Someone to ask for advice and go to reenactments with. A good person for moral/personal advice even if their political/social views are outdated. Definite bonding over dogs.

Napoleon - Would entirely depend on how we met. I feel like we’re similar enough on a personal level that it’d be very easy for our personalities to clash, and we’d have to declare ourselves mortal enemies and neither of us would back down from that because what is admitting you might have been hasty. Or, if fate were kind, we’d get on splendidly with constant low levels of dry sarcasm and prank wars. There would also be lots of emotions everywhere, at all times. People would hide. I have to admit I’d still stab somebody if it meant I got to be a Marshal. 

11. The most powerful quote by or about them?

Rommel - have  short one and a long one

"We have a very daring and skillful opponent against us, and, may I say across the havoc of war, a great general." 

- Winston Churchill during 1942. During the fucking war. I mean damn, it doesn’t get better. Though since this is easily the most famous quote about him, have a personal favorite;

“Living legends, they project, each in his way, the classic image of a the warrior: brave, vigorous, sharp of eye and mind, rapid in decision, alert in danger, faster and bolder in the fight than his enemies. of this extraordinary brotherhood is Rommel-the brotherhood of Hector, of Rupert of the Rhine, of those who can only be described as heroes; and it is curious that so determinedly practical a modernist as Rommel-the least fanciful of men- should have joined a company so bonded by myth.” 

-David Fraser from Knight’s Cross: A Live of Field Marshal Erwin Rommel

Napoleon - 

All animals are equal, but some are more equal than others

i mean; 

History is a set of lies agreed upon. 

- Napoleon at some point, i’m not sure. But i’ve always loved it and found it apt.