#new year's gift basket
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archiesbestgiftstore · 8 days ago
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The arrival of the New Year is always a time of excitement, renewal, and reflection. It’s a chance to leave behind what no longer serves us and look forward to a fresh start. Whether you’re making resolutions, setting new goals, or just taking a moment to breathe, the start of a new year brings with it an undeniable sense of possibility. It's a time to embrace what’s to come, and part of this celebration includes exchanging gifts with those we care about. Gift-giving isn’t just a tradition; it's a beautiful way to express love, appreciation, and the hope that this year will be full of new adventures and opportunities.
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rafesangelita · 6 months ago
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pogue!sweetheart!reader surprising rafe with a birthday cake and he’s just like “????? for me????” bc no one has ever celebrated his birthday or made it special for him 🥺
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“don’t look!” you laughed, currently struggling to keep your hands over rafe’s eyes as you two stepped into your camper. “mm, it smells good in here.” he hummed. you were practically buzzing with excitement, your smile reaching your ears as you slowly pulled away from him. “okay..” you started, “i know you said you didn’t want to celebrate today, but i couldn’t help myself,” you pecked his cheek, “you could open.”
rafe should’ve known you would go all out for him, his lips pursing together as he took in the sight of his own personal cake and gift basket on the counter. your smile faltered at the look on his face. “is everything okay? do you not like it?” rafe blinked, swallowing thickly as he glanced over at you. “you did this for me?” the disbelief in his voice pulled at your heart strings.
“of course.” you nodded. he walked up to the counter, getting a closer look at the cake. you knew how much he loved the your buttercream frosting, so of course you had to include it just for him. ‘HAPPY BIRTHDAY R♡FE’ was also written on top in baby blue lettering. “this is.. wow.” he let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding. the room fell silent, your heart pounding out of your chest as you waited for rafe to say something else.
as if sensing your uncertainty, rafe finally looked up at you, the worried look on your face making him feel terrible. “i’m so sorry, babe, it’s just- i’ve never had this before.” he pulled you into a hug, pressing a kiss into the crown of your head. “i love it so much, i promise,” his large hands rubbed down your back, “no one has ever done anything like this for me.” he laughed softly. “no one has ever surprised you for your birthday?!” you exclaimed, looking up at him. “never. my birthday is just another regular day.” you gasped, not believing the words coming out of his mouth.
“no, it’s not!” you pulled away, picking up the cake. if someone told rafe that on this day last year, he would have the prettiest little thing holding up a cake she made just for him, telling him that his birthday is special, he wouldn’t believe them. “i don’t think i could accept this-” you were quick to cut him off, “i swear i’ll cry if you dont eat it.” rafe wanted to believe your threat was a joke, but he didn’t dare chance it. “okay, okay..” he surrendered, finally letting this whole thing be okay with him.
“well..” you gazed up at him, “what do you think?” rafe met your eyes, seeing nothing but pure love and adoration staring back at him. “i think that i need to marry you.” you smiled as rafe took a finger full of icing and popped the digit in his mouth. “fuck, that’s amazing.” he took the cake out of your hands, placing it back on the counter before grabbing two forks. “don’t dig into it yet, i still have to sing you happy birthday.” rafe put the fork down, now pacing around excitedly as you motioned towards the gift basket.
“open it.” you couldn’t help the huge smile from adorning your face as rafe took each item out one by one. cologne, a few new shirts, his favorite snacks, a homemade birthday card, and..
“are these your panties?”
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lissdiary · 5 months ago
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during the holidays, it was tradition to participate in secret santa with the class. you reached into the basket, picking a folded piece of paper with one of your classmate’s name on it. you hoped it was katsuki’s name, but unfortunately it wasn’t. it was mina’s name on the paper, and while you absolutely adore her you had hope it would’ve been him.
you noticed denki handing the basket to katsuki to grab a paper. he unfolded it and hid in his pocket, you couldn’t help but wonder who’s name was on his paper. you had a crush on katsuki for a few months now and when your friends began teasing the both of you, it lead to you slowly getting to know another. you both grew a close bond, causing your crush on him to grow more and more. that same night, you were walking to your dorm when you noticed katsuki opening his door, leaving it slightly open. it was a sign for you to come in, a common thing the two of you do when you wanna talk to each other.
you knock twice before you opened the door, spotting the blonde cleaning his desk. “hey kats, whatcha doing?” you walked up behind him, catching him off guard. he jumped to the sudden question, putting whatever was on his desk away. “nothin, nun of yer’ business.” he closed his drawer, turning around to look at you. “didn’t look like nothing to me, was that for your secret santa?” you teased him, causing him to roll his eyes and sit on his bed. you followed, sitting beside him. “tch, no. i’m not doin’ that.” he spat out. you knew katsuki wasn’t the brightest or most spirited person, but you had hope he would’ve participated if your name was on his paper. guess not.
the next day, you asked katsuki to accompany you to go shopping. you wanted to grab a few things for yourself, but also for mina. you instantly knew what to get her, a gift she’d happily accept. katsuki followed you around like a pup, putting on an act as if he didn’t enjoy it.
you stumbled upon a store that had cute fashionable clothes that appeared to look like mina’s style. you grabbed a couple shirts and skirts and went upfront to pay. at the counter, there was a display of phone charms. you already had one but the color was wearing off and it was hanging on by a thread. you grabbed one of the phone charms to look at it closer, but ended up putting it back since you already have one. katsuki took a mental note of this, looking at your phone charm then looking at the new more detailed one. he knew you liked stuff like that, plus it was time for a new one. after a while, you both decided to head back to the dorms in order to prepare mina’s gift.
katsuki notices everything about you, your favorite coffee order, the way your perfume smells, whether you prefer gold or silver, your favorite flower, and your favorite season.
as christmas came by, your gift was nicely wrapped topped with nice lacy ribbon. you sat on the couch, waiting for secret santa to commence. you noticed katsuki was sitting across from you with his hands in his pockets, a slight angry pout on his face. when it was your turn, you grabbed your gift and walked over to mina. “merry christmas!” she took the gift in her hands, opening it excitedly. she squealed, “aw thank you soo much, yn! i love it!” she stood up from her seat to give you hug. you sat back down and waited for your gift.
after it was over, you realized you didn’t receive a gift this year. “oh, yn doesn’t have a gift? did someone forget?..” you thought to yourself, maybe someone had forgotten to get a gift, or forgotten to put your name in the basket. you went upstairs to your dorm, teary eyed at the fact that someone forgot about you.
you noticed katsuki’s door was slightly open again, you knocked twice before entering. katsuki was sitting on his bed, a gift basket beside him. he still had his typical angry pout on his face, but this time he looked nervous. “merry christmas”, he mumbled looking away from you. “kats? what is this?” you walked up to the basket, quickly noticing how it was filled with everything you love or recently mentioned to him. “ts for you, idiot. i was your secret santa.” you looked at him with tears in your eyes, giving him the biggest hug.
you felt so relieved to know that someone got you a gift, that katsuki had gotten you a gift. “thank you, kats.” you got off of him to look at the basket, you immediately noticed the phone charm. “did you seriously go back just to get this for me?” you picked it up, removing the old one to replace it. “tch, noticed yer old one was all worn out, thought it was time for a new one. yer welcome.” your heart jumped, you never realized how much he truly payed attention to you. katsuki had went out of his way to get everything for you, on top of that decorating it to your liking. “thank you kats.”
“yea whatever.” he mumbled.
christmas couldn’t have gotten any better.
sweet request from @teddi1423 ♡!
— sorry if i’m lagging on reqs, i’ve been so busy this whole week & will continue to be until next week ! i promise to publish soon !
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sunnami · 7 months ago
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the (poly) marauders + lily as reversed tropes.
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a/n: i tried moving to a new blog.. possibly got shadowbanned... that other blog is now my dump blog, LMAO. pls enjoy this drabble!
i. academic rivals except it’s two teachers who compete to have the best class.
“It’s driving me mad, Prongs,” says a frazzled Remus Lupin, pacing back and forth in his nearly-empty classroom. Sirius watches from where he sits backwards on a wooden chair—not at all concerned with the woes of his lover, rather preoccupied with the derriere of the DADA professor, hugged beautifully by his trousers. (He makes a mental note to thank Lily and her shopping sprees in Muggle London later. And, thoroughly.) Lily eyes Remus warily, ignoring the way James is tugging at her newly-trimmed hair like a lovesick fourth-year. 
“I’ve fought in the bloody war, what do you mean my ‘pronunciation could do with some work’?” Remus scoffs, a bewildered expression on his flushed cheeks. Then, he points to the basket of lemon poppy-seed muffins, “And, the gall to send me that. Can you believe it?”
“No way,” Lily widens her eyes in mock outrage, gasping for melodramatic effect. “How dare anyone send our sweet, darling Remus homemade muffins?”
Remus dangles the swing handle of the wicker basket by his hand, nose scrunched in disgust as though it could turn him into a werewolf for the second time. “It’s not about the baskets, Lily! It’s a fear-mongering tactic—a threat, if you will. If Gryffindor doesn’t win the house cup, I might as well resign from my post.” 
James chortles, leaning back against his seat to fully stare at Remus. (And what a lovely face he has.) “Don’t you think you’re going overboard there, Moony? We’ve won the bloody thing every year—and if we’re running behind Hufflepuff, I can always give ickle Harry a hundred points for being our son. Quite a feat, wouldn’t you agree?”
Lily smacks him on the arm. “Don’t you dare, James Fleamont Potter!” 
Sirius whistles. “Full name. Yikes. You’re on your own there, mate.” 
James glares at him. “I’ve had my tongue down your throat, don’t call me ‘mate’.” 
Grinning, Sirius diverts his attention back to the pouting werewolf, struck by whatever magical spell you’ve cast on him—and their happy little wedded bunch. (He particularly likes the way you raise your voice when the Weasley twins charm your greenhouse with the colors of maroon and yellow. The upturn of your nose and raw fury in your eyes does something funny to his heart.) “Be honest, Moony, you’re just frustrated because our favorite professor is wearing those bell-bottom jeans that make their legs look just utterly delectable,” he grins salaciously. 
“Can confirm,” replies Lily with a chirpy nod. “The back view is even better.” 
“Well, yes, but that’s beside the point, my love,” Remus splutters with a cough. “It’s a matter of legacy and pride now. If—”
“While I appreciate being the topic of conversation, I’ve come to collect my students’ papers on Hinkypunks and Dugbogs,” you enter the fray with a knock on the door, startling them from their conversation; a wide smile on your face and a yellow scarf around your neck. “You see, I like to give them points myself when they score above a hundred percent. It really motivates them for the end-of-year exams.” 
James beams at your arrival, like a sunflower blooming under sunlight on a summer day. He stretches his arms wide, a space perfectly carved for you. “Come here, darling,” he calls out for his spouse, quickly affirming that the jeans you’re wearing is a blessing to the wizard kind. (He wonders if you’d let him peel it off you tonight.) As you perch yourself atop his lap, James nuzzles the crook of your neck, pressing soft, butterfly kisses to your skin. “How was your day?”
He captures your lips and you eagerly lean into his warmth. “Perfect now that I’ve found you all. Why were you hiding here, anyway?” you ask innocently, fluttering your lashes at Remus. “Did you get my gift, Moony? The elves helped me with it last night.”
“He’s just cross because you’ve become the entire castle’s favorite teacher in your first year,” Lily points out treacherously, flashing her doe eyes at Remus. (Great, now he’s got two pairs of the prettiest eyes on earth staring into his soul. He’s so beyond in love with everyone in this room.) “Not even the Malfoy kid complains about you, and he still grumbles when I have to do my yearly check-ups.”
You laugh knavishly, beckoning him over. “Is it my fault that I’m so lovable?” 
Remus scoffs, yet finds his feet drawn towards you in long, impatient strides. He leans down until the scent of ambrarome and coconut overwhelms your senses. You tug on his duck-printed tie, smiling as he grumbles lightheartedly into your lips, “Not at all, darling.”
“Shall I lock the doors now?” Sirius offers mischievously. “I’ve always wanted to do it in a classroom.”
ii. it’s too hot to cuddle!
“Mmmrgh, Lily, get off, you fiend,” you groan into the sweat-soaked pillow, suffering from one of the worst heat waves Godric’s Hollow has ever seen—swatting your wife away as she throws her leg over your thigh, impishly nibbling on your neck. On any other day, you’d relish the feel of her skin on yours, the tendrils of her flaming red hair tickling your bare arms—or the times you’d wake up to a tangled mess of crimson in your mouth. But today is just not that day.
Lily sniffles. “Ah, woe is me. My own son doesn’t want to hug me anymore, and none of the people I married want to cuddle me on this dreadful—what ever happened to ‘til death do us part’, you traitors?” 
You roll over on the bed to face her with an incredulous glare—the pretty witch has the nerve to smile at you. “Don’t be so dramatic, Lily. Just cast another cooling charm, or something.”
Lily flops onto her side of the king-sized bed, breathless and flushed, arms splayed out like an octopus—wincing apologetically when she hits you in the face by accident. “I already did. We might just have to get naked to put up with this heat.”
James pokes his head through the door, glasses forgone and black hair messily strewn over his eyes; the damp fabric of his white shirt clinging to chiseled, dark skin. (Ah, the joys of marrying an active Auror and former Quidditch prodigy.) “Did someone say get naked?”
“Way ahead of everyone,” says Sirius as he steps out of the bathroom, having taken his fourth shower today, and wearing nothing but his birthday suit, face towel strung over his shoulder and toothbrush in the side of his mouth. 
“Oh Gods, Sirius!” Lily squeals as she throws a pillow at him. “Get back in there and put some clothes on!” 
“What?” he retorts quizzically, swirling around to give everyone a show—and a generous view of his abs and firm backside. And, well, the other thing, too. “It’s not like you haven’t seen any of this before.”
Last to join the party is Remus, who barely spares a second glance to the naked Sirius Orion Black. “Pack your things, I got us a room at a Muggle inn for an hour. Harry’s downstairs waiting for everyone. He says he’ll rip off the stuffed Padfoot’s head if no one accompanies him to the pool later.” 
That is all he says before swiftly exiting the room.
You stare at the spot where he had been standing previously, whispering in awe, “God bless the Remus Lupins of the world.” 
iii. too much communication.
“—and the thing is,” you say through your weepy blubbering, nose swollen and eyes stinging from crying for the last thirty minutes. “When you guys get all secret-ey and start avoiding me, it really makes me feel like shite. And. . . and then—!” you pause to hiccup, breaking down into sobs once more when Sirius gathers you into his arms, laying his love all over your skin, kissing your tears away as he coos into your ear. “And then, Gilderoy Lockhart comes and says that you all hide away in this h-house, or shack, or whatever and meet your secret girlfriend there! I know you said it was just us and you’d never, ever cheat—and I trust you all more than life itself! But I have to know why you disappear from me every month on a particular night. A-Are you tired of me or something?”
Sirius hushes you with his lips, brows contorted—as though he’s in pain because you are in pain. He cradles the back of your neck, placating your worries with whispers of devotion. “Oh, darling, I’m sorry. We didn’t mean for it to get this far. We just wanted to keep you from harm. You’re our world, our entire heart. If you’re hurt, it hurts worse for us, little love.” 
Remus kneels by your feet, grabbing your hands in his; eyes dripping with fondness and warmth. The gold flecks in his eyes glimmering like stars in the night sky. “There’s something you have to know about me, love. We should have told you this long ago—but I was afraid you would look at me differently.”
You end up in another crying fit, overwhelmed by his kindness and sincerity. “I’ve seen you when you had food poisoning, Remus Lupin, I was the one who cleaned your vomit on the floors—nothing on this earth can make me look at you differently.”
Remus chokes, before gathering his bearings, hiding wet chuckles in your lap. “I’m a werewolf, my darling. That’s why we avoid you during full moons. To keep you safe. Your safety is always going to be one of my highest priorities. I’d die before I would let Moony harm a pretty hair on your head.” 
“Is that it?” you croak, whimpers subsiding as relief floods through your veins. “Truly?”
Remus nods. “Truly.”
“Oh, our poor love,” Lily murmurs, delicately running her hand through your hair, a worried knit in her brows. “I’m sorry we let it get to this point. Look at you—you’ll cry yourself sick.” She procures a daintily-embroidered handkerchief from her skirt pockets, gently dabbing at your damp eyes, eyes creased with love. “I’m sorry,” she says once more, pressing her lips to yours until all you feel is her instead of hurt. “No more secrets, I promise.”
James scratches the back of his head with a crooked grin. “Well. . . there is one more. Remember that time you saw a stag in the corridors? That was me. And, the dog trying to get a look under your skirt was Sirius.”
You blink. “What?”
iv. child hero has very involved parents.
Harry James Potter is known as the Boy-Who-Lived, the beloved Chosen One of the wizarding society, if you will. He has a destiny to follow and all that—well, if he could actually do anything heroic.
“What do you mean there’s a basilisk in the castle!” you shriek, a poor vase in Dumbledore’s office shattering to a million pieces. Harry drags a hand down his face—this is going to be a very long night. Suddenly, he regrets writing a letter to home about the happenings in the castle. (How was he supposed to know that all five of his parents would march into Dumbledore’s quarters the moment they heard about the blood on the walls and the petrified students?) “Why haven’t you shut down the school yet? Are you waiting for more students to get hurt?” you press on heatedly, James and Sirius flanking your sides like protective bodyguards. 
“Have you taken any protective measures?” Lily asks worriedly, holding onto Remus’s hand that’s resting on her shoulder. (Honestly, Harry thinks, rolling his eyes inwardly. The lot of you are worse than Molly Weasley at this point.) She turns to Harry, “What about Hermione? Is she safe? Oh, her parents must be worried.”
“You know what,” you say standing up, pivoting on your heel as your flock of lovers follow in suit. “We’re leaving, Harry dear, let’s go.” 
“Go?” the twelve-year-old echoes dumbfoundedly. “Go, where?”
“Home,” you reply with no room for arguments. “Until the matter is resolved, you are staying home. And tell Hermione she’s welcome to stay with us, too. And, Ginny. Ronald, as well. Actually, darling, why don’t you just tell all your friends the Potter manor is open to them whenever.”
Harry thinks you’ve just decided that on a whim, but he knows that Lily and his fathers will go along with whatever you want, regardless.
Your gaze slices to Dumbledore with a low hiss, venomous enough to rival a Slytherin’s taunt. “Fix this or I shall hunt down that basilisk myself.” 
Harry’s shoulders slump. 
So much for fulfilling prophecies and defeating dark lords.
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a/n: drabbles are so fun!! this was so fun to write (but not trying to set up another blog.. NEVER AGAIN, I AM STAYING HERE!) i might do some more drabbles since my brain is fried after my last few fics which were long as heck.
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notiddygothgf · 1 year ago
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2/2
★ pairings: choso kamo x f!reader
★ synopsis: Yuuji Itadori truly was the best friend a girl like you could ask for, but he wasn't the only reason you came to visit. (His older brother, the devilishly handsome Choso Kamo, had always been the apple of your eye).
★ c.w.: slow burn, friends to lovers, eventual smut, childhood sweethearts, kinda, mutual pining, choso with a tongue piercing, rough sex, cunnilingus, backshots, unprotected sex, regular people au, two year age gap, PWP.
★ a/n: part two! its all smut lol. anyway, like I said, this one shot is finished (just split btw two chaps bc theres 11k words). but if u comment and persuade me who knows! I can always do another. im a whore for ur validation.
★ w.c.; 5k
best friend's brother ; chapter index
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YUUJI COOCHIE <3
|  come over tn?
|  i got smth i wanna run by u first
YOU
|  omw.
You stood on Itadori’s porch, finger poised over the doorbell a month after your eighteenth birthday. You had been anticipating to see your best friend, Itadori. But as the door swings open, what you don’t expect is to come face to face with Itadori’s older brother.
Your heart drops, and your breath catches in your throat as you take in his appearance. It felt for a moment as if time had stood still since you last saw him. He had only grown more handsome during your time apart. His dark hair was done back into two messy buns, deep bags residing beneath his deep eyes. 
Choso looked absolutely breathtaking . His fitted black tee clung to his chest and arms, showing off his toned physique, while the baggy black sweats he was sporting gave him an effortlessly cool appearance.
His presence exudes a magnetic charm that takes you back to when you were 17. His half smirk sends a wonton shiver down your spine.
“Hey there,” He says, deep, rich voice sending ripples of familiarity throughout your body.
When his lips pull away from his teeth, forming syllables and words, you couldn’t help but notice a small glint of metal near the tip of his tongue. You realized immediately what had seemed so different about him, and your eyes widened in surprise.
“You pierced your tongue?” You blurt out, unable to hide your shock.
Choso nearly snorts, though his eyes never leave yours. “You’re not surprised to see me?” He teases.
“I am,” You retort quickly, trying to regain your composure. “You’re home for the holidays?”
He nods, gaze still fixed on your red face. “Just came home last night.”
That would explain why I didn’t see you, you thought.
“I’m glad you came, though, I’ve been holding onto your birthday gift for a while now,” He sighed, stepping aside to let you into the house but keeping his arm braced on the doorframe. 
You slide under his muscular arm, doing your best to ignore the way your body bristled with electricity when you brushed up against him.
You set your bag on the ground near the door, kicking off your shoes and neatly pushing them aside while Choso locked the door behind you. 
“It’s in my room,” he said, passing you.
You followed him nervously up the stairs into his bedroom, heart pounding a little louder with every step. This would be the first time you would find yourself alone in Choso’s room, and you couldn’t help but let your mind wander.
As you enter his bedroom, you drank in your surroundings – a rare sight. The room was a reflection of Choso’s personality; band tees all over the walls, sheets laid flat and clean, laundry sitting in a basket in a neat, folded pile – a subtle hint of organized chaos.
It felt both familiar and new at the same time. The air was thick with anticipation, and memories of your whirlwind summer fling with Choso came flooding back.
You brace your hands on the door. “Is Itadori home?” You ask him, hands tracing the doorframe while Choso rummaged through his drawer. You sat on his bed.
“Nah,” he replied casually.
Furrowing your brows, you tried to make sense of the situation. But told me to come over…
“Is he coming?” You tried again, voice tinged with uncertainty.
Choso rose up from the bedside drawer, extending a small box towards you with a slight grin. “Nope,” he said.
The realization hit you like a freight train. This was a fucking setup, and Itadori was the mastermind behind it all.
He wanted you alone with his brother. He knew about your fling with him. 
He didn’t notice when the two of you had disappeared to the pantry for ten minutes. 
Though the moment you returned to see him glancing at you with a curious brow raised, you knew he had finally caught on. Even if he didn’t say anything about it.
He knew.
He had set you up.
Your face was on fire. Still, you took the small box from Choso, an awkward smile on your face, and carefully undid the little bow. As you opened it, you revealed its contents – a tee shirt with Choso’s University crest on it, a glace pendant on a fabric necklace, and a box set of your favorite film saga.
Choso had never given you a gift for your birthday before, at least not anything beyond a card. Briefly, you wondered if it was his way of making up for your 18th birthday party, the one he had missed.
“Choso…” You began, a humorous grin on your lips. “Merch?”
He shrugged playfully, his gaze locked onto yours. “In case you miss me,” he replied, tone teasing yet sincere.
With a genuine smile, you leaned over and hugged him. “I love it,” you had told him.
Choso reached into the box for the necklace, gesturing for you to come closer. You leaned in, allowing him to loop the fabric over your head. His fingers brushed against your skin, your neck as he adjusted it.
He froze. You froze.
For a while, the room was quiet. There was an intense stare-off between you two. Choso cleared his throat, seemingly about to break the moment, but you had other plans. Gently, you gripped his chin between your index finger and your thumb, turning his head back to you. 
Gently, you tugged his lower lip down. He stuck his tongue out to wet the corner of his lips in return.
Your breath hitched as your gazes locked, and the air in the room shifted. Choso’s dark eyes shifted beneath your gaze, and you found yourself drawn closer to him.
You swallowed. “How bad did it hurt?” You asked, eyes fixed on the sliver of metal you had caught a glimpse of inside of his mouth.
Choso raised a finger towards his mouth, bringing your attention back to his tongue. “This?” He asked. “Hurt like a bitch, not gonna lie, but it healed up real nice.”
Wordlessly, he stuck his tongue out so you could see it up close. You examined it carefully – it really had healed up rather nicely. There was a small, silver ball wedged into the pink muscle. You wondered how it would feel on your lips, your neck, your body .
Choso closed his mouth. “I got it the first weekend after move-in day,” He explained.
“Why?” You inquired, curiosity finally getting the better of you.
He shrugged with a smirk, “Thought it would look hot. What do you think?”
“I think it looks like a pain in the ass,” You retorted. “Don’t any of the girls you kiss complain about that thing?”
“Quite the contrary,” he remarked, licking his lips. “Why’d you ask?”
You tried to ignore the jealousy that bubbled up inside of you, deep inside of you at the thought of him kissing other girls. You had to remind yourself who you were talking to here. You would have been naive to expect loyalty from a college freshman.
“Looks cold,” you commented instead. “I don’t imagine that would feel very good.”
And his eyes, those dark, beautiful cesspools of emotion, dropped down to your lips, lingering for a moment too long before returning to meet your gaze. “You wanna find out?” He asked.
“Piss off,” You scoffed, hitting him playfully on the shoulder. But the blush on your cheeks betrayed the effect his words had on you. “Fuckin’ tease.”
He didn’t move back. No, instead, he leaned in a little closer. “You sure?” He whispered, warm breath grazing the shell of your ear. “I can show you how good it feels, if you want.”
And that’s how you wound up here, with his face buried between your legs. He kissed his way up and down the skin of your thighs. You made quick work of his twin buns, tugging the ties out of his hair.
His lips curled into a knowing smirk. He lifted one of your legs onto his broad shoulder, running his tongue along the length of your inner thigh, pressing a kiss right where your ass met your legs. The metal ball on his tongue felt odd against your skin, but not necessarily unpleasurable.
You had never gone this far with him before. You were turned on beyond comprehension, hungry eyes drinking in the rosey hue that dusted his pale complexion while he sucked on your skin – hard enough for it to hurt, hard enough to leave a mark. 
Tenderly, Choso reached for your panties. He appeared to be on the precipice of a decision. 
“Can I…” He panted, trailing his thumb over the thin piece of fabric that separated the two of you. “Can I take these off?”
You nodded quickly, lifting your hips up for him while he guided the panties off of your legs. 
He licked his lips and parted your legs a second time, fully exposing you to his ravenous gaze. 
“You look like heaven,” He breathed out, voice trembling. He took a moment to admire you, smiling at the way you tried to hide your face. “Wanna taste…”
You had never done this before. The one man you had ever dared to hook up with hadn’t bothered. So you swallowed the lump in your throat, watching him get down on all fours and dip his head down between your legs like a man with his head bowed in worship. 
Though you were far from holy, in that moment, you felt like you were God.
His tongue was hot and wet against your skin, licking a stripe from bottom to top. The metal ball of his tongue piercing caught on your puffy clit, eliciting a quiet gasp. 
“Feel good, baby?” He teased, relishing in the way your thighs tensed around his head. His eyes flitted between you and your pussy – spread open for him like a buffet – pupils blown wide with desire. His pink lips parted around his tongue a second time, and this time you watched him.
Watched him press the metal ball against your clit, rolling over it in slow, steady circles.
You felt like you could die here. 
He adjusted his grip on your hips, pulling you down on the bed until you felt his nose pressing in between your folds. He kissed your heat, moaning into you.  Then, without so much as a warning, he began to eat you out like a starved man.
“Fuck, Cho–” You cried out for him, reaching down to tangle your fingers into his inky black tresses. You had never felt so good in your life, like he had been waiting for this as long as you had. You were sensitive, far too sensitive to comprehend the way your body felt, the way his tongue piercing felt as it glided over your hot flesh.
He didn’t slow down. He licked, slurped, and kissed your swollen clit, keeping that unforgiving pace up until your hips began to jump against his tongue.
“Shit,” You hissed,
He moaned into you in response, meeting your gaze with an intense fire burning behind his eyes. His tongue massaged you up to what you know would be the hardest orgasm of your life – that damn piece of metal made for one hell of a stimulant. It felt like it was pressing right up into your pressure points, deeper than his tongue was able to reach.
You felt yourself come apart at the seams, reduced to a moaning mess in a matter of minutes, riding his tongue like your life depended on it. He stopped moving for a moment, letting you grip him by the hair and ride his face. 
You couldn’t look away.
He looked amazing, fire burning behind his eyes, fingertips biting into the skin of your thighs, brows furrowed with concentration. His eyes never left yours, not even once.
You dropped your head onto the pillow, sitting back and allowing him to resume what he had been doing earlier – that thing with his tongue. 
And resume it he did, assuming a more demanding pace this time. It almost made you want to cry – the pace, the ball on his tongue – it was almost too much to bear. It felt so good.
You felt that familiar coil in your abdomen, almost like you were about to cum, then in a moment’s width he had pulled away. 
You struggled to regain your surroundings, vision cloudy and hazy with pleasure. You could hear your rampant heartbeat racing in your own ears. 
Choso leaned back with a stretch, cracking his neck and licking his lips. The entirebottom half of his face was drenched, dripping with an obscene mixture of your slick and his spit. 
He looked gorgeous, even when his face was tinted red. 
“Choso…” You breathed, letting a breathless chuckle slip between your parted lips.
He grinned back at you. “Any complaints?”
You didn’t glorify him with a response, gripping him by the fabric of his shirt and tugging him up and over you. You searched for his lips, locking them between yours in a messy, heated kiss. The taste of you lingered on his tongue, tangy and a little sweet.
“Shut up and fuck me, Kamo,” You panted with a grin of your own.
That was all he needed to push you onto your back, diving back in to ravage your lips again. It was all a rushed, passionate haze – he tugged your tee shirt over your head, you shoved your skirt down to your ankles and kicked it off the side of the bed. He leaned back with a stretch to reach for the back of his shirt, tugging it over his head and flinging it to the side. 
Your mouth nearly watered for him. He was everything you had dreamed of and so much more. Well defined arms, pecs, abs – a few tattoos littered the broad expanse of his chest. His torso tapered down into a thin, slutty waist. You let your hand slide down his abdomen, eliciting a quiet groan from him as your painted fingernails caught on his toned abs, ghosted over the large tent in his sweats that left nothing to the imagination. 
He was big. Bigger than you had anticipated. The last man you were with was about 3 inches (which was probably for the better, because it had been your first time). He felt about three times as big as that. Maybe more.
It didn’t take long for him to flip you onto your stomach, pulling your ass flush against his navel. He reached for a handful of your hair, jerking your head to the side, then uttered against your ear, “G’nna fuck that attitude right out’ta you.”
He left you for a moment while he undid the strings of his sweatpants. You couldn’t watch. You knew if you saw it, you would have doubts. 
But you found yourself looking back anyway, right as he had told you. “Wanna reach into that drawer and grab me a condom?”
“Are you um…” You swallowed. “You don’t have any diseases, do you?”
You knew you were clean because you were so disgusted by the man you had hooked up with before Choso that you’d taken yourself to the planned parenthood in town the day after to be tested. Even if you had used a condom.
Choso’s brow quirked up at that. “No, I don’t have any STDs. I get tested twice a year.”
Oh. Okay.
Again, you didn’t want to think about how many women had taken his dick before you. 
“Never gone raw before, though,” He mused quietly, hand rubbing mindless circles over the skin of your ass. 
“Really?” You asked.
“Is that a surprise?” He retorted, though he didn’t seem very hurt by your comment. “Can’t babytrap me.”
You thought about definitely didn’t think about Choso being a father. 
“Is there any way for you to, like…” You hummed, trailing off. Your inexperience had never been more disgustingly apparent. “Pull out?”
“You’re talking like this is your first time,” he laughed breathily.
You paused. His eyes widened.
“Is… this your first time?” He asked again.
“I had sex with this one guy from my class a while ago,” You said after an awkward silence. “He was small and, like, really bad at it.”
Choso seemed humored by your honest admission, though it came at the expense of your own embarrassment. “Why’d you go through with it, then?”
“I only did it to get back at you,” You turned your head back to the pillowcase below you. With a pout, you admitted, “Thought for some reason that by me having sex, I was proving something. I was younger and stupider, okay?”
“So… you’ve only had sex once?” He asked. You didn’t realize this was an interrogation. 
You nodded embarrasedly. Somehow this was more humiliating than being spread open for him like you were right now.
“You sure you want this?” He hummed, roaching forward to tuck your hair behind your ear. It was strangely intimate. When you nodded, he sighed. “We’ll go slow, then. I don’t wanna hurt you–”
“Don’t treat me like I’m fragile,” You cut him off, finally turning back to look at him. “I can take it, okay? Just answer the damn question.”
Choso leaned down over you, pinning you into the bed, kissing down your spine. “We can… do backshots,” he murmured against your skin. “Want that?”
“Mhm,” You sighed, easing into his touch.
You had waited far too long for this for something like a condom to get in between the two of you. You wanted to feel him. All of him. 
Choso rolled back, slipping his tip between your fold and swiping it through your slick. You watched him, watched the way he bit his lip at the sensation, eyes glued onto the place where you met him . 
He pursed his lips, letting spit fall from his lips. You watched it dribble down, landing right onto your twitching hole. 
That was so fucking hot .
Then, without a word of warning, he pushed the tip in. You gasped at the sudden intrusion, feeling the burn, the stretch of his girth inside of you. He paused for a moment when the tip was the only thing inside of you, brows drawn together, breaths shallow.
It took everything you had not to cry out in pain. You had been waiting your whole life for this.
But, shit, it hurt. He was big. You felt your body struggle to accommodate him.
Maybe some prep should have been in order…
Oh well, gotta see it through.
As if sensing your internal dilemma, Choso reached down, intertwining his fingers with yours. He placed a soft kiss to the back of your neck. 
“You okay?” He asked you.
No . Yes.
“Yeah,” You bit out. “Just… I ‘jus need a minute.”
“Just tell me when,” he pressed another kiss to your hot skin. “You’re doing so good.”
It took you a few more minutes to adjust to him. Every minute, he would slip in a little further, just enough to make your skin hot and flushed. You could feel him throbbing inside of you, throbbing against your spongy walls.
Eventually, you gave him the green light. And, fuck, it was like something inside of him had snapped. He slid the rest of the way in until his hips were flush with your ass. He drew out, slowly, then thrust back in again.
It felt like he was pulling you apart over and over again, snapping his hips against yours in a progressively harder fashion. 
Choso whimpered quitedly, pausing his harsh movements to change pace. You clenched around him in response, something that made him double over. “Ah, fuck,” He gasped. “You feel so fuckin’ good.”
He drew back, thrusting into you once more. You felt your whole body jolt forward with a loud moan of your own.
With wild, passionate eyes, Choso pulled out again, leaving just enough room for the tip. Then, he slammed back into you. Again, again, again – he was relishing in the way you cried into the pillow.
“Fuck, fuck,” You chanted, like some sort of sinful prayer. “ Fuck me, Cho– ”
“Might not last long if you keep callin’ my name like that,” He gasped, tangling a large hand into your messy tresses and gripping it tightly. 
You drew your brows together, allowing yourself to be lost in the pleasure, the attention he was giving you. What would Itadori think, you wondered, if he walked in on you like this – face down ass up in his big brother’s bed?
“Choso ,” You groaned into the pillow. It felt like he was scratching an itch deep inside of you – not your coochie, but your soul. It felt like you were made for this. “ Choso, Fuck. ”
Itadori slipped into his house with a quiet sigh. He kicked his shoes off, set his bag down on the floor, and then reached for his scarf. It had been one long, hellish day. He felt bad making you wait for him, but he didn’t doubt that you would have made yourself right at home in his bedroom by now. You were probably sprawled out over his bed, passed out or playing with his PS5.
He froze when he heard something come from upstairs. It sounded like furniture being moved around, or something like that. There were voices, too.
With knitted brows, he walked hesitantly towards the stairs. Was it coming from up there?
“Fuck, Choso,” He heard a vaguely familiar – albeit very muffled voice – moan. 
It was you. You and another muffled voice.
“Choso, Choso!” 
“Right there?”
“Fuck– yes! Don’t stop!”
He quirked a brow. Then, with a sigh and a dejected shake of his head, he hid away in the kitchen.
“Please!” You gasped, you fumbled around behind you in search of his hand. He grabbed it, pinning your arm behind your back and thrusting into your sore pussy from a new angle – one that made you feel dizzy. You didn’t know how long the two of you had been going at it. All you knew was that you never wanted it to end, that your mind was a blissful haze.
Your body slid up against the bedsheets – up and down, up and down, clenched fingers leaving wrinkles in their wake. 
“Fuck me harder,” You pled.
And fuck you harder he sure did. His chest rolled against your backside, pinning you into the mattress and holding you right where he wanted you. Then he fucked you a little harder.
You were all but screaming his name at that point. “Choso–” 
The head of his cock was bullying into you, beating against that spot deep within you that made your feet fly up, rubbing the back of his thighs as if to tell him ‘ keep going’.You gripped the sheets with unwarranted strength, feeling yourself drip and clench around him – hearing the obscene squelch you made when the two of you met in the middle. 
“ Fu-u-uck ,” You cried, voice high and weak.
“Quit suckin’ me in like that,” He chuckled, though it was cut short by a deep, guttural groan as you did it again. “ Shit , you want kids or somethin’?”
There was a knot in your stomach. A vaguely familiar warmth that seemed to only grow hotter by the second.
“ So perfect, so wet ,” Choso commended you, licking the shell of your ear, peppering butterfly kisses to the back of your neck. Your name fell out of his pretty lips between a cacophony of sinful noises.
You felt yourself get lost in him, craning your head around to take another look at him. His angelic face, scrunched up with pleasure, mouth hanging open just slightly, pale face dusted with pink. Inky black hair plastered to his forehead and neck with sweat. The muscles in his chest and torso rippled.
“I’ve wanted you…” You gasped, trying your best to articulate despite the stimulation he was giving you – it was almost too much. “Since I was young – fuck .”
His hips stuttered. He pulled your hair away from your neck, kissing the junction where your jaw met your neck. 
He gripped your hair to crane your head back, slowing his thrusts to long, deep strokes that had you trembling. 
“The feeling was mutual,” Choso grunted, trying to keep himself together.
You felt your eyes roll almost all the way back into your fucking head, mouth hanging open, drooling shamelessly on his pillow, his sheets.
You were close. So close.
Those deep, lust-filled eyes of him weren’t doing anything to slow the train that was coming. Each thrust, each slide of his cockhead against your g-spot brought you closer and closer to the edge.
“You feel even better than I imagined,” He growled, and you nearly came right then and there. 
He moved his hands so that your hips were up in the air for him, bringing his other arm around your neck to pin you there. When he picked up pace this time, you felt yourself drip – like, actually drip – all over him.
I wanna have his kids .
Your moans and pleas matched the pace of his sloppy thrusts. He was getting close, too. You could hear it. No, seriously, noises like that should have been criminal.
The feeling of being filled by him was driving you up the wall – almost as hard as he was currently driving you into the mattress. You never wanted it to end. 
But, shit, it was about to.
“Choso,” You whimpered. He didn’t slow down. “Think ‘m g’nna cum.”
“Yeah?” he gritted out, breath fanning over your neck and your cheek. He reached a hand down, releasing your neck to rub slow circles on your puffy clit – a speed that felt foreign compared to the harsh strokes he was giving you, but not entirely unwelcome.
That was all it took to have you hurling towards the edge, ass jumping up and down to meet his thrust in the middle, to take as much of him in as you possibly could.
“Yeah, shit,” He gasped. He was trying to hold on for you, but you were making it realhard. “G’nna cum for me, baby? Lemme fuckin’ hear it.”
You were all but throwing it back on him, mindlessly chasing your release like a bitch in heat. The moment you got the green light, your orgasm snapped. You cried out his name one final time, arching your back all the way into the sheets, spasming wildly around him. The shock tore through you in waves.
Your hips jolted with hypersensitivity while he fucked you through it.
Choso’s hips stuttered. He twitched, like he couldn’t take another minute of this, then he remarked, “That was so fuckin’ hot, holy shit – fuck, wait–”
He slid out of you rapidly, leaving you to gasp at the sudden loss of him. The next thing you know, he was stroking himself to completion. He came with a broken whimper of your name, spurting ropes of warm cum all over your back.
You took a moment to catch your breath. He did the same. A few moments, actually.
The silence that followed was deafening. He groaned, running a shaky hand through his hair. You collapsed into the bed.
He had left the bedside at one point, though only for a moment before he returned with a warm wash rag. He cleaned his love paint off of your spine.
Then, tossing the rag into his hamper, he collapsed next to you.
You chuckled breathlessly, throwing your arms around his neck and kissing him with all of the strength you had left in you (not much). “Shit…” 
“Shit,” he agreed, licking his lips. “You were great.”
“You were better,” You said. “I don’t think I’ll be able to walk home tonight, though.”
Choso shrugged. He reached down, pulling the covers over the two of you. “Sleep here, then.”
Sleep here.
You recalled many nights of him walking girls to the door. Choso never let girls stay the night.
He wants me to spend the night with hiim.
You laughed, reveling in the irony of it all. Years and years of pining led you here, to this. “What would Itadori think?”
Choso threw an arm over your waist, pulling you closer to his side. “Fuck what Itadori thinks.”
Your world went black a moment later.
Your eyes fluttered open as you lay in the aftermath of a steamy evening with the man of your dreams. Choso, your best friend’s brother. The one you had fucked.
His lips were pressed into the slightest pout. You watched him snore, taking note of how peaceful he looked while he slept, taking note of the way his tousled black hair fell into his pretty face.
With a contented sigh, you reached for a shirt that lay nearby – his shirt. The one he had taken off yesterday. You slipped out from beneath the covers, padding quietly out of Choso’s bedroom. Your feet were quiet against the wooden steps.
As you entered the living room space, you contemplated sneaking into the kitchen in search of some much-needed sustenance. It had to have been later in the afternoon at that point – you assumed that you and Choso had been sleeping for a few hours, at least. Your stomach grumbled in agreement.
Just as you were about to step into the familiar kitchen, however, you froze. There, sitting at the table, munching on a Kit Kat bar like it was no one’s business, was her best friend. 
Itadori.
“Hey…” You said rather awkwardly, heart racing. “You’re… you’re home.”
Itadori quirked a brow, looking you up and down curiously. His eyes noticeably lingered on your neck, right were you had a sneaking suspicion Choso had marked you with his lips and teeth. 
“Hey,” He finally said. “You two finally done up there?”
“You heard that. Of course you did,” You sighed, dropping your stiff arms and plopping into the stool next to him at the kitchen island. You faceplanted into the cold surface, groaning, “How much did you hear?”
“Enough to know my brother’s good in bed,” Itadori took another bite. He placed a heart over his chest, feigning an exaggerated cry of, “ Choso– oh, Choso, don’t stop, I’m cu–”
“He told me you weren’t coming home,” You groaned, even louder this time. You were glad that Itadori couldn’t see the nasty shade of red that had painted your features.
“He lied,” Your best friend chuckled, crumpling the wrapper of his Kit Kat bar and tossing it in the trash bin. He stood off, dusting his hands on his pants, reaching for his phone. Then, like nothing had happened, he said,  “I’m ordering Chinese. You want?”
You raised your head at that, taking a slow glance at the room around the two of you. “I could go for some beef and broccoli…”
You loved the bond you had with Yuuji. Unbreakable, truly. Sometimes a little toocomfortable. This was, undoubtedly, one of those times.
Itadori dialed a few numbers into his phone. He paused, raising his brow again, “I think you’ve had enough meat tonight, don’t you?”
“Shut the fuck up,” You sighed, though you laughed a bit at his joke. 
Images of Choso flashed through your mind. The image of him spitting on the tip before slipping it in. The image of him tangling a fist in your hair, craning your head back to look at him while he pounded you into the mattress.
With a faint smirk of your own, you remarked. “You’re probably right. I should save room for all of the meat I’m gonna be eatin’ tonight after you go to bed.”
“Please shut up,” Itadori sighed, running the palms of his hands over his exasperated face. With a shake of his head, he held the phone up to his ear. “I really don’t want to think about my brother putting his dick in you. Not while dinner is also in the question.”
You shrugged. Your phone buzzed. Turning it over, you read the new message you had received.
CHOSO    just now
Whered u go beautiful
Your phone chimed a second time.
CHOSO    just now
Steamed dumplings n fried rice plz
You turned the screen over with a grin, telling Itadori. “Your brother wants steamed dumplings and fried rice.”
“I’d say fuck my brother, but tonight’s game night and I don’t want you taking that literally,” Itadori sighed. Still, he unmuted himself, telling the woman on the other side of the phone, “Another order of fried rice and dumplings, too, please.”
Yuuji Itadori really was the best friend a girl like you could ask for.
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a/n: hi there my little steamed dumplins <33 lmk what u thought!!! I love reading ur comments and dms. again, this is a one shot, but I would totally drop another part if yall would like -- gotta show papa choso some love. comment and lmk what u think pookiesss
comments + reblogs are greatly appreciated!!
I obviously do not own jjk or anything related to it. please do not reproduce, copy, or translate my works anywhere. dont fk w me im a bruja.
taglist: @missphanosaur18 ,
wanna join the ' choso kamo ' taglist?| bfb; chapter index
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sun-kissy · 1 month ago
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hii i love your writing!! can i please request a scarf 🧣 with james potter + "my hands are freezing, just let me warm them on you for a second," please? thank you!🩷
of course you can, thank you for your request!! here’s your scarf, angel <3
hot cocoa | j.p.
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— "My hands are freezing, just let me warm them on you for a second."
james potter x reader
“Jamie! Look at how adorable this is!”
“Huh?” Your boyfriend trudges through the snow from a short distance away, wrapping an arm around your waist as soon as he gets close.
“Oh, yeah. This is really cute,” he grins, taking the miniature from you and examining it. It’s an acrylic-painted Santa Claus, riding a sleigh pulled by a couple of reindeers. “It’ll look perfect on the table in the hallway.”
You place the miniature in your basket, nudging him back towards the stall he was patronising with a peck on his cheek.
James and you were spending the evening at a Christmas market near your place, which he’d spotted during a morning run. 
Your day had started at an ungodly hour when he pounced on you and excitedly shook you awake, sweaty palmed and panting. You listened begrudgingly, half-asleep, as he rambled on and on about the numerous stalls and decorations being set up.
It was impossible to say no to his big, brown eyes and pouty pleading — so here you were a couple hours later. To his credit, you were having loads of fun. You’d managed to find gifts for all your friends. James had even bought a whole new tree, almost as tall as himself. Now, he was looking at ornaments for the tree while you scoured the stalls for decorations to brighten up the apartment.
“Hey, sweetheart. How about this set?” he calls out, waddling over to you with a huge box of shimmering golden baubles and ribbons hugged to his chest. You pull your scarf tighter around yourself, chilly wind nipping at your skin. He hands you the box, fingers brushing against yours.
You shake the box, peering at its contents. “Yeah, I think a gold theme would be nice —“
“Babe.”
“Hm?” You stick a hand in, pulling out a bauble and squinting as you examine it. “This one’s got little hearts —“
“Babe.”
“Yeah?” you look up, and James’ eyebrows are bunched together in a frown. He takes the box from you, half-mindedly closing it and setting it down.
“What’s wrong?”
He sighs and gently grabs your hands, gloved fingers brushing over your reddened knuckles and fraying skin. “You’re cold, sweetheart.”
You smile sheepishly, meeting his gaze. “I’m okay, really. I’m not that cold.”
“No, you are,” he mutters, teeth pressing into his gloves as he pulls them off. “Here, put ‘em on.”
James helps you pull the gloves on, lovingly berating you for not heeding him when he told you to dress warmer before leaving the house. You try to deny feeling the cold, but he’s right — your hands are shaking, teeth jittering when you speak.
He continues to rub your gloved hands between his, worry still contorting his features. “Better?”
You nod, grinning. “Yeah, thanks. You’re my hero.”
He rolls his eyes and tugs you closer to peck your forehead. “Yeah, yeah. Let's go get some hot cocoa to warm you up a bit. I can still feel you trembling.”
James goes to pay for the set of baubles and the trinkets you’ve collected in your basket. He comes back and wraps an arm around your shoulder, steering you towards the café nearby with a kiss to your frigid nose.
You can’t stop the widening smile on your lips as you enter the café, much-needed warm air instantly hitting you. James seats you down, asks you if you’d like a snack with the hot cocoa, tells you to sit tight and that he’d be right back after ordering.
You feel the love like a numbing ache in your chest, worse than the chill in your fingertips. You’d known James a long time. But this was your first year as a couple, first Christmas together. And in moments like this was when you knew how much he really loved you — not that there wasn’t an abundance of affection and kisses everyday, but it really was nice to know how much he cared about something as simple as your feeling cold. 
“What are you smiling at?” he asks with an arched eyebrow, returning to the table holding two mugs. He passes you one and you murmur a quiet, “Thank you,” shaking your head indulgently as you take a sip.
“Nothing. Just… I love you.”
He beams. “I love you too, sweetheart. But what’s this about? Did I win your affection by dramatically giving up my gloves?”
“No, of course not,” you laugh, reaching across the table to whack him. “You’re a jerk. My affection can’t be won.”
“Oh, really?” he chuckles, pulling his hands off the table before being met with your attack. “Fine, then. No more hugs for you.”
“Jamie!”
“What? You’re not feeling cold anyway, a hug wouldn’t do you any good. Your words, not mine.”
You sigh good-naturedly, rolling your eyes. “Actually, my hands are freezing.”
“Oh, are they?” he teases, gently easing your mug of hot cocoa out of your grasp. 
“Yes, they are! Just let me warm them on you for a second,” you laugh, making grabby hands towards him. He puts the two mugs where you can’t reach them, standing up and sliding into the booth seat next to you.
“If my best girl needs to be warmed up, what other choice do I have?” he sighs dramatically, bundling you up in his arms and stamping a kiss to your cheek as you giggle. “You’ve made a loser out of me, babe. I love you.”
“I love you too.”
san’s christmas sleepover
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sabertoothwalrus · 11 months ago
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hey if you want to try a FREE-to-play cozy game (with no pay-to-win or gacha scams) that’s like a mix between Stardew Valley, Animal Crossing, and a lil bit of BotW/TotK for PC and switch, you should play Palia. It’s an mmo so you can play with your friends and cook, fish, collect bugs, etc together!
should note:
they just released a lunar new year festival update, like, yesterday. I haven’t even gotten the chance to play it yet!
the game IS in open beta, so it can be buggy sometimes. But the glitches are usually pretty funny and again, it is a free game, so I can’t really complain
you can be poly
you can romance a robot
the community is very friendly, if there’s a rare node people usually call it out in the chat and wait for everyone to arrive before taking it.
if you make an account using my referral code you get a fruit basket welcome gift 🤭
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gumisbwunni · 7 days ago
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just thinking about the jjk guys getting you christmas presents...
cw: suggestive :)
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like ik Gojo would SPOIL you rotten, like your christmas tree would be STACKED with all the gifts he got you.
what did he get you?
anything youve ever laid your eyes on. Gojo is a good listener and observant, he'd take anything youve mentioned you wanted and add it to his notes app. And the best part is that youre alaays shocked when its an item you kentioned earlier in the year.
Now Nanami, ugh my mannn, i know hed be a good gift giver, though its not as extravagant as Gojo, he would maybe get you maybe like 5 gifts max? but they would all hold so much value.
He seems like the type to gift you a puppy or cat, or like an expensive necklace that hes worked sooo hard for, all that overtime means nothing to him, when sees the way uour eyes light up and your smile so big it makes his heart swell.
Mm next is Getooo, my other man, he'd definitely gift you things you need, like lets say you ran out of favorite perfume, but its too expensive for you at the moment so he'd definitely gift you it. Or maybe you're in need of a new bag or shoes, he wouldnt hesitate to gift them.
lets talk about Toji, hehe, mm id say he would try to save up for christmas but its hard for him :/ like he seems like hed rather give you wtv money so you can just buy what you want, or he'd walk into victorias secret to buy you cute lingerie for you (him)
ouu yesss, he loves buying you lingerie, its his favorite thing to do, bc he gets painfully hard imagining you wearing wtv skimpy thing he buys you.
Hmm, Sukuna, (im thinking of him in a modern au) mm youd def be his first girlfriend so he doesnt know what to get you, he finds it kinda dumb, but he doesnt want you to feel like he doesnt care, he does. He cares so much, that he will buy months prior just to make sure the things you want arent sold out and get on time. He cares so much, that he asks yuji to help him wrap the gifts. He cares SO MUCH, that he writes you handwritten letters, saying how much he loves and appreciates you.
Hm thinking about Megumi, since he didnt inherit his dad's gambling issues, he def have a good money saved up bc of gojo, i like to think gojo couldve given him an allowance, so hed probably gift you some sort of jewelry, or something you'd been wanting for a long ass time. Though hes not good at showing affection, he thinks he deserves the world and would gladly buy you anything youd want.
next up is baby Yuji, ugh hed def get u burr basket :( he'd get you face masks bc he knows how much u love them (he also loves them), he'll get you your favorite snacks, and some cute matching pjs and socks, he'd def write a cute little letter for you :(
He seems like the type to buy anything matching, he just loves it. So hell def buy you and him, matching grinch slippers, ouuu if ur into hello kitty or sanrio, he'd get you anything sanrio, from plushies, jewelry, to mugs. Hesss soo cute :3
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passingnotions · 6 months ago
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On Set | Jihyo
smut, 900~ words
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You find yourself balls deep in Park Jihyo and in front of a DSLR camera with a very, very bright studio light setup. You both have your knees up on the cheapest couch imaginable—white, tacky, stiff—as your arms hook and pull around hers. Her back has been arched like this for the better part of two minutes, tits presenting (and bouncing) for the camera as dictated by the director. When you finally let go, she moans. It’s performative, satisfactory. But you also know it’s real.
See, you and her go way back. A few years worth. Jihyo has been in the industry for so much longer than you and, despite it having been your first scene together all those years ago, you blew her back out like she fucking deserved—her words, by the way. Phew, that was new. What’s your name again? It stuck with her and you’re vainly proud of that, so much so that every time you’re arranged for a new scene together, she brings in gift baskets and goodies; pampers you in hopes that you fuck her the only way you know—the right way.
As if you’d ever disappoint.
And it’s funny that you’ve never hooked up off the clock—a shame. There’s always a point in conversation, during prep time, where you both laugh at the thought. You have always thought it’d be disastrous in the best of ways. Have to keep the magic on screen, however. 
Something important to note, to digress: this crew sucks at everything. Your agencies both wanted in with a new fledgling studio, your manager called it. Their content is good, consistent, but you’ll be damned if it’s not generic. However it goes and however trite their camerawork, they’re making bank, and you’re there to profit off both of your names alone. 
There’s a before, during, and after to things. The latter two are good: a pretty girl with a pretty face gets railed by some nondescript cock and some part of her ends up glazed white. The former, however, leaves a lot to be desired. Best summarized? Solid creative vision. Near-zero technical prowess.
So, the sound guy needs another break. Something’s off again, he says as you’re mid thrust. The director yells cut for the umpteenth time and you bury yourself to the base to check in with your costar.
“You’re fucking kidding.” Jihyo says under her breath, head turning back to you. She sets her toned arms on the backrest of the couch and lays her head. “How long has it been?”
“Two hours.” 
It should have taken three, but the timer will count four by the end—
You take another long back-and-forth drag inside of her warm, tight cunt.
—Not like you mind.
Jihyo starts pushing back onto it; an experimental one-two, hips bucking ever so slightly with the majority of your cock still inside her folds. You figure she likes the way your balls brush against her clit. You do, too.
“It’d be a shame if—” She shimmies a little side-to-side. “You filled me up and the cameras weren’t rolling.”
Edging for the last hour. How would you say the question lands?
Jihyo snakes a hand under her body to reach for where you’ve started to fuck, slowly, slowly, purposefully. She runs circles with her middle finger, and with a very serious tone: “Keep going.”
Your hands land right where her ass overflows onto her hips when she spreads the knees a bit further apart. Her arch settles. With a long drag back—and a tight grip of that muscled frame—you fuck into her. Once. This firm thrust that makes her whole body shudder. You catch her profile as her lips curl a smile.
“Keep going.” Her fingertips move faster.
And when Jihyo’s asking—“sure”—you keep fucking going.
Okay, the shoot does end up taking four hours, but not because of the staff’s lack of equipment know-how.
You are fucking. Truly, unequivocally, fucking. Like you’ve missed her (you have—she’s fun), like she’s missed you.
The sheer force it takes you to not cum right then and there—to help her reach that ever sought-after climax—is the same force with which you pound Jihyo into the cheap, faux leather couch. You’d swear, later on, how she near melded with the piece of furniture: nail scratches on the surface, the imprint of the seams on her skin. She loves all of it. It’s guilty-pleasure levels of abrasive. You don’t fuck like that on camera. Authenticity can’t be quantified on a payslip.
And for that short amount of time, the set dissipates; the crew vanishes.
Jihyo is cumming—you know this, her tells. Goosebumps all over her skin, from the top of her thighs up to her rippling, reddened cheeks, and the way her moans turn to breathy coos and needy whimpers. You revel in knowing you can split her apart. That same satisfaction ends you in tandem.
Because there’s no other way you would have it, without a doubt. This short burst of fire burns right through your core. Your hands grasp her skin for dear life as your legs cease and stiffen their motion. All of it—the money shot—coats Jihyo’s pulsing cunt in an instant. It sends ripples through you both as you struggle to maintain a semblance of composure. The load washes over your length in this pleasing warmth that has Jihyo shivering through the remainder of her orgasm. Slow quivers. A bit of contented laughter.
“Fuck yes,” escapes her lips before the crew fades back in, curses and yells accompanying an attempt to catch whatever’s left of your unsanctioned stunt.
You’ll take the extra hour.
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phas3d · 11 months ago
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All I Wanted Was You || Slytherin Boys
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type :: angst
tw/cw :: insecurities, slight yandere (tom), mention of abuse (mattheo), sexual things implied (theodore)
contains :: draco, tom, mattheo, theodore, lorenzo
summary :: inspo by paramore's "all i wanted was you" cause it's forever a banger. basically, different situation the guys would be in for this song. kinda inspired by tara yummy and jake. i literally know nothing about them besides that tara is hella pretty but yea! - 🐍 :: masterlist!
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DRACO MALFOY (enemies)
It's just impossible for Draco to like anyone that he does not hate because his brain just does that
He's a straight bully for you, awful in every way possible
Spilling milk down your book bag, writing mean messages on your desk, and more
His entire group would join him on this, making your years at Hogwarts miserable
That was until you finally had someone stick up for you, the most surprisingly person ever, Tom Riddle
Tom was the only person that Draco was ever scared of since Tom was one year older than everyone plus he was the strongest player in the entire school
Instantly, Draco backs off, running away like a pussy when he makes eye contact with Tom
But Tom doesn't help you up or even touch you, he just simply tells Draco to piss off and find a new hobby
You decide to thank Tom for his action, making him a batch of cookies with little smilely faces on it with chocolate
The next day, you hand them to Tom and he's slightly surprised
He's never had someone be kind to him before out of pure want, normally it's out of fear
From this, you two begin to talk about baking and different desserts that you both love, Tom has a major sweet tooth which is ironic for a scary intimidating guy
Draco sees this all, feeling so angry but he's not sure exactly why
He gets huge balls all of the sudden as he marches up to you and Tom's shared potions table, tossing the entire basket of cookies on top of your hear
But before Draco can laugh at you, Tom's wand is in his hand he casts a spell to prevent the cookies and basket from falling
Tom gives Draco a death glare, silently telling him that if he ever does that shit again, Tom WILL beat the shit out of him
From this, you once again gift Tom more sweets the next day in order to thank him again
And Draco can't do anything but watch bitterly from the other side, biting the skin him his cheek until he bits off a small piece
As the months pass, you and Tom get even closer, enjoying each other's silence and small sweet gestures
Draco hates this since it spoils his favorite hobby, tormenting you, and it also hurts his heart to see the person he's obssesed with begin to forget him
In order to stop this, he makes a huge masterplan with his goons to catch Tom off guard and completely embarrass him by spilling a disgusting, smelly, sticky potion all over him
The first step of the plan requires Draco to distract him while his goons wait for his signal to spill the liquid all over him
But as Draco got closer to where you and Tom usually sit, he saw Tom and you kissing, breaking the kiss as you giggled while Tom gave you a small smile
Instantly, Draco was heartbroken. He wasn't sure how to treat his crush or what to do, and now he lost you
He can feel his heart strings rip and disconnect from the different veins in his body as he stares at what could have been his
If he was just a bit nicer
He doesn't even know why he's mean, he's never liked being mean to you
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TOM RIDDLE (best friends)
Befriend Tom Riddle was one of the most impossible tasks in the world but you somehow did it
Ever since year 4, you two were the two duo - a grumpy x sunshine duo
It was odd since you were popular, well liked, smart, all of the traits of a literal goddess
While Tom was a brooding, mean, know-it-all that didn't care for others
But maybe that's the exact reason why you two were best friends, opposites that completed each other
Tom's not good with emotions, he struggles to identify anything he feels without looking into a textbook as to why he feels that way
But he knew that you would be a good wife and mother, creepy to say but in his mind "crushes" are simply just "likely mating option"
He's weird asf for that, but that's the only way he can process a crush in his head
Cutely enough, he goes to not Mattheo or Draco, but surprisingly Theo
I think that Theo and Tom get along great due to them both being quieter and the most level-headed out of their entire group
Theo is a renowed quiet fuckboy who draws people in with his mysterious aura, which is like Tom but without the "drawing people in" part
Overtime, Theo gives Tom some advice on how to get you to like him and how to show his feelings for you
But it constantly fails due to him not being able to break out of his emotionless face and dull tone
He gifts you flowers, but mentions how they were on sale and how he picked the colors he liked despite you hating those colors
He does all of your homework as a gift, but talks about how he's surprised you're even passing in Hogwarts with how stupid you are
You get the idea... He has the right idea but horrible execution
But you're used to his meanness, making you see his attempts at romance as just "Tom being weird" as usual
So when you mention to him that you think you have a crush on someone, Tom instantly is destroyed
He wants to support you, since he loves your smile and happiness, but he can't bring himself to pretend that he likes this idea
He asks who it is, and you say Theo... The exact guy who was helping him try to get with you
Tom dismisses himself from the room without saying anything, you see this as Tom not caring for romance
But in reality, he's running down into his chamber of secrets to calm down
He throws his robe off of him in anger, slamming it into the ground
He whips out his wand and yells, blasting the beautiful snake statues that he bought
His breakdown causes him to destroy everything beautiful within his radius
The feeling of grief and pain is so odd and overwhelming to him, he doesn't understand why he feels like this
All he knows is that he wants- no needs you. And he's willing to do anything to get that
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MATTHEO RIDDLE (exes)
Being friends with your ex is one of the biggest red flags ever, you never thought you would be that type of person
But here you are, still best friends with your ex, Mattheo
You two broke up over him cheating on you with some random girl, but somehow Mattheo snuck his way back to being your friend after months of apologies
He always wanted to get back together, regretting his actions every day, but you knew better than to give him two chances
You've always been popular with the guys, attracting a lot of them but turning them all down since you were still healing from Mattheo
But now, you were much more confident and content with yourself, feeling ready to get back into dating
Mattheo laughed at this thought, thinking it was just an attempt to make him jealous and that you would finally come back to him
But when he saw you walking down the hall alongside Harry Potter, he instantly felt like a bullet shot him a million times
You looked so happy with him, laughing and joking with him as if you've known him for ages - just like you do with him
Once you and Harry split up, Mattheo pulls you aside, completely ignoring the fact that you have class in about 2 minutes
"What are you doing with him?" He hissed, gripping your arm kind of aggressively
"Ow! What the hell is your problem? It's just Harry??"
"It's not "jUsT hArRy", what the hell are you doing with him?"
"Why does it matter?"
"Because you're MY girlfriend???"
"No I'm not! And I never will be again!" You shouted at him, shoving him away as you stepped into class, leaving him in the empty hallway
His heart shattered, a raw and gut wrenching feeling that he's never felt before over anyone besides his father
The pure disappointment and hurt he felt was scary - he's supposed to be big and tough, a bad boy, yet you had him wrapped around your finger against your own will
So many emotions hit him, the feeling of guilt from ruining it all, self-hatred because of how stupid he was, the jealousy, the insecurities, the fear of being so deeply in love with someone who may never reciprocate it back
He won't ever admit it to anyone, but he skipped all of his classes that day and hid in the forest by himself, smoking and crying until either his lungs or heart gave out first
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THEODORE NOTT (situationship)
You two had a weird relationship that was almost like dating but you two never put a real title on it
This went on for about 2 years: Making out, going on small dates, always hanging out past curfew
You both loved each other, but Theo wasn't able to fully commit and neither could you after seeing all of Theo's flaws and toxicity
You never told Theo this, but if he ever confessed to you, you would still accept it despite knowing how awful of a boyfriend he is
And Theo never told you this, but he's always wanted to confess to you but he knew he wasn't in a good spot mentally yet to be a good partner for you yet
A small pinch of right person, wrong timing because I'm such a sucker for that trope UGHH
Theo was yet again messing around with another random girl, something you got used to
At first, it used to make you really upset and make you have full on breakdowns, but now you're used to it and have fully accepted that you have no control over Theo
But you still couldn't help to feel a tad bit jealous of the situation
You ignored Theo and his new girl toy for a week, knowing that Theo would probably come back to you sooner or later
But a month passed, and you two still haven't spoken...
Maybe Theo did actually like this girl, but if he did, then why hasn't he told you he wants to fully cut you off?
You shrugged it off, it's not unlikely that he just completely forgot you (he would never be able to do that, but you don't know because AGH I love the misunderstanding trope idc idc idc)
Since you thought he wouldn't come back, you decided to move on to no other than Lorenzo, one of Theo's closest friends
Lorenzo has always liked you but he never made a move since he knew you were basically with Theo
But he's always kept close tabs on you and saw how you were secrectly lonely since Theo moved on from you
With Lorezno, it was so different, DRASTICALLY different
He was so sweet and kind in public which Theo never did
He was possessive over you but he still let you have freedom, something that was so complicated with Theo
He was easy to converse with and actually replied to everything you said, completely unlike Theo
And most importantly: he didn't seem to care much about your body at all
Overtime, you slowly forgot about Theo as you focussed purely on Lorenzo
But Theo never forgot.
He was so angry at first, wanting to beat up Lorenzo for taking you and wanting to yell in your face for cheating on him
But he was thinking all of this whilst gripping his new girl toy's waist
He was just messing with this girl since she was so easy and innocent, something that Theo loved about you before he corrupted you slightly
As he watched you accept Lorenzo's ask to be his valentine, Theo felt his jaw tense up as he watched you smile brightly at Lorenzo
Lorenzo was exactly the man Theo wanted to be for you, but Theo wasn't that man yet
And it broke him to know that maybe in a different universe, a universe where he was shown healthy relationships, a universe where he didn't only feel value from sexual acts, maybe in a universe where he just tried harder - That could have been him with you
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LORENZO BERKSHIRE (best friends)
You've been Lorenzo's best friend ever since you two got into Hogwarts, you two were rarely ever seen apart
People always confused you as a couple but you were very quick to state that you two were just friends
But Lorezno always hoped that one day you two could date
He's loved you for ages, literally 1 year after being your best friend he realized he was madly in love with you
But since he's been super busy with quidditch, you were left to do your own things
That's when Cedric started to talk to you while you waited for Lorenzo to get out of practice
Instantly, you two clicked and shared so many interests together
Lorenzo couldn't do anything but watch as you laugh at Cedric's jokes and playfully hit him, something he thought you only did to him
His entire heart feels so heavy that his broom starts to sink to the floor without him noticing
Once his practice ended, it was time for Hufflepuffs to use the field
"Alright let's go get some food! I'm so hungry." Lorenzo whined to you as he packed his jersey into his gym bag
"Um, actually I was wondering if I could stay behind?" You said, blushing lightly still from your interaction with Cedric
"What? Why???" He was so confused, but he knew deep down what you were going to say.
"Cedric said he would take me out to get some dinner after his practice. He made a bet that for every goal he scores, he'll owe me that many chocolate frogs!"
You smiled happily, breaking Lorenzo's heart even more
"O-Oh. Yeah that's fine uh... I'll see you tomorrow then." Lorenzo said, he was doing his best to hide his emotions but he couldn't stop his eyes from watering up
He turns away from you, speed walking away to his dorm
Once he's in his dorm, he breaks down heavily
He always thought it would be you two in the end, that you two were the perfect fictional slow-burn relationship that he's always dreamed of
But now you liked Cedric? Someone who was objectively almost better than Lorenzo in every way
Cedric was smarter, WAY better at quidditch, made you laugh within seconds, and even had the confidence to ask you out??!?
His tears wouldn't stop, he felt so stupid for crying but he couldn't control it
All he's ever wanted was you, and Cedric took you away so easily
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thank you for reading ! 🐍 :: masterlist!
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archiesbestgiftstore · 9 days ago
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https://archiesonline.com/product-category/greeting-cards/new-year-greeting-cards/
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Ring in the New Year with heartfelt messages and beautiful designs from Archies! Their collection of New Year greeting cards offers the perfect way to send your best wishes to loved ones. Whether you're looking for a thoughtful, funny, or elegant card, Archies has something to suit every style and sentiment this New Year.
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bratbarzal · 6 days ago
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Let It Happen (LH43) 3/3
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Pairing: Luke Hughes x Fem!Reader
WC: 17k
>PART ONE< / >PART TWO<
I'll spare you from everything, if you would still have me, I'll be waiting all my life
General Warnings: pining and longing and fluff galore!!! I think maybe sexual references but who remembers atp. angst (slut shaming, mentions of past relationships and I can't think of a better way to say daddy issues we've all been there)
A/N: we did it, Joe!!!! desktop tumblr really didn't want this to happen!!! I can't believe I finished this!! thank you guys so much for reading, and liking, and messaging me and reblogging and all the commentary, and all the love!!! I appreciate it so much!!
if there is a crossover of readers of on your side and readers of this fic (first of all ily) there is a little oys easter egg in here!! did I think through the logistics of this being set in the same universe? no. did I have fun anyway? yes. I fell in love with writing Luke in that fic so it was only right for me to add it in here!!
Happy New Year to everyone, thank you for reading my work!! 2024 was the year I finally plucked up the courage to write all my random thoughts down and the fact that it spiralled into this blows my mind a bit, but I'm grateful to be here!!
You can distinctly remember the first time you had properly taken notice of Luke Hughes, and it wasn’t back in the restaurant at the club like he probably thinks.
It had been early November, in your freshman year.
Ellie had finally convinced you to join her at one of the games at Yost, and you were bundled up in a coat two sizes too big, the only thing you had remotely close to team colours, and the only thing likely to keep you warm enough to tolerate a whole game and warm-ups.
You were watching the boys skate around, and he had caught your eye in an instant. 
“Who’s that one?” You had asked, pointing down to where number 43 was reaching out awkwardly to sweep up pucks with his stick. You could see the soft brown curls peaking out the back of his helmet from all the way in the stands, and his height made it unmistakable to realise that you recognised him.
He had come up to you at a Halloween party the week before, and if you hadn’t been so preoccupied by the fact that your only-just-ex boyfriend at the time was in the same room, his tongue down another girl’s throat, you might have been endeared by the boy in the dog costume. 
Friendly smile, boyishly handsome features and warm eyes that under any other circumstances might have made your heart skip a beat. It wasn’t the first time you had seen him - you vaguely remembered the gift basket, and you knew he was in a couple of your classes, but you had never really spared him more than a fleeting glance before that party. 
As soon as he had noticed your teary eyes upon approach, his demeanour had changed in an instant, and where anyone else might have backed off, might have been uncomfortable or deterred, done a u-turn and given up on his mission to approach, his expression had softened - worried and caring in a way that made your throat go dry, and you had to dash off to the nearest bathroom to splash your tears away.
“That’s Luke,” Ellie had told you, “Luke Hughes, Jack’s brother.”
“Oh,” You had pouted, disappointed. Jack had made it painfully obvious that he wasn’t your biggest fan the first time you had met him, and if you’re honest, you were hardly a great admirer of his, either. 
Ellie had noticed your expression, had nudged you with her elbow until you took your eyes off of the figure on the ice, and had narrowed her eyes right at you. “Why?”
“He’s in a couple of my classes, is all,” you shrugged, eyes travelling back and finding him in an instant.
“Luke’s cool. You’d eat him alive, though, probably get bored within a week.”
“I wasn’t thinking about him like that,” you frowned, watching him skate around the ice with the grace and enthusiasm of a clumsy puppy dog. Cute. “Just curious.”
“He’s waaaay too nice for you,” she scoffed, and you had tried to swallow down the pang of offence you had felt, knowing she had very little of your past to compare him to. The two of you had only been roommates for a couple of months at that point, and she had only ever seen you interested in your ex. “He’s also kind of a like a little brother to me. Dorky and annoying, but I’m very protective of him.”
You had bit your tongue at how patronising that had sounded, knowing Ellie was one of the youngest people of your freshman class - a July baby - and Luke might even have been older than her. 
“Like I said, just curious.”
You had noticed Luke a lot more after that, though.
A quiet, recurring presence.
A seat behind you in business comms, a figure against the wall in the corner of the room at different parties, on posters that lined the walls and the perimeter of Yost Arena, in articles you edited for extra credit in the Michigan Daily. 
You had even made small efforts to get him to talk to you - never being the type to make the first move, yourself - started talking to his friends, some of the guys on the hockey team, had made sure his name was on the list for your sorority parties, you’d even dropped your pen once in class, and he’d just handed it back over with a soft smile, never uttering a word.
You wouldn’t call it a crush, but it was somewhere around the borderline of that - especially looking back after the summer you shared with him.
And you think, in retrospect, that if he’d have ever made a move, would have spoken to you even just once after the incident at the Halloween party, you probably would have developed one.
You hate to admit it, now, but he had been right all those weeks ago in the restaurant. 
He’s kind of inevitable like that.
By the time he disappeared in your sophomore year that little spark of something had mostly fizzled out, but it didn’t entirely stop you unintentionally keeping tabs. Stats that cropped up on the sports channels, articles in the paper, posts on your instagram feed.
And you don’t know what you would call it, the way he kind of stuck with you, but when you’d seen him in that booth in the beginning of summer - when he’d spoken to you in full sentences, had met your eye and held contact in a way that sucked you in like a vacuum - you kind of felt that spark reignite.
The boy you almost, kind of, could have known, once upon a time, finally making the effort to get to know you.
And Luke Hughes is persistent. You have a detached admiration for just how much. He pushes, and he presses, and he perseveres until all your resolve is gone - resolve you’ve spent years mastering, with quick wit and snark protecting your heart from anyone who dares to take aim for it.
But that detachment is waining. 
Especially as you lay on your front on your childhood bed, the NHL awards playing on the TV in your room back at your mom’s house, and you try to busy your hands with the crotchet kit you had picked up from the mall before you came home for a couple of days. 
Your admiration is blooming and blossoming in the depths of your stomach into something intricate and uncontrollable. 
And it has nothing to do with his name, his career, the award he is nominated for.
It’s just him. 
Larger than life on your TV screen, but it still doesn’t capture him in his entirety, and you think for the first time that you miss him. You miss movies in his bed, you miss watching him from the passenger seat of his BMW, the sun shining from the window beside him, illuminating his profile until you burn from the glare. You miss his stupid jokes and his teasing smiles, and you miss the warmth in your cheeks when he looks your way.   
And it’s only been like 2 days.
You miss Luke Hughes.
You kind of think you missed him before he even left.
You might have even missed him before you knew him, but that would be crazy, right?
Maybe he makes you crazy.
Maybe you need this week to recuperate, to attempt to build those walls back up before they’re damaged beyond repair. 
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Luke hadn’t given much thought to missing you before he and his brothers left for Vegas. He’d been so caught up, internally, about his and Quinn’s nominations, that he had thought it would continue to distract him the whole time they had been out there, but boy was he wrong.
All he remembers about his trip is thinking of you, and when the boys got back, and you had been visiting your mom for the weekend, all he could do was think of you more.
He thought of you when they sat at the table for dinner, and your place across from his was empty. He thought of you when he watched movies alone, thought of texting you some sort of commentary as he worked his way through the list of rom-coms you had given him, but you hadn’t texted him yet, so he gave up quickly on that idea.
He thought of you in bed, thought of the last time the two of you had been in there, together, and if he’s honest, he thinks of that almost all the time. Of messy kisses, wandering hands, and connection so deep he doesn’t think it will ever fizzle out. 
And when he finally sees you again, he thinks he might have to get Quinn to source some sort of defibrillator for the house, because he swears his heart stops beating.
You poke your head into his bedroom, a shy smile on your face, and your bag is still on your shoulder, which means he had been your first stop, before you’d even gone to drop your things in yours and Ellie’s room. 
He sees you in the reflection of his mirror, and turns immediately, clumsy fingers releasing the tie he’s been struggling to get right for a couple minutes, and steps toward you before he can even begin to tell himself not to seem so eager.
“You’re back!” He grins, and when your face lights up in return, he can hardly find it in himself to care anymore how down bad he comes across.
“Yeah,” you breathe, stepping into the room, discarding your bag by the door and shuffling toward him. “You didn’t have get all dolled up for my return.”
You reach to take both sides of the tie into your hands, and he feels himself go warm all over at the mere proximity of you after so long apart. 
“It’s my cousin’s wedding,” he tells you as you start to knot the tie, knuckles brushing slightly across his chest until he’s holding his breath, lungs expanding so that he feels your touch a little more. “They’re having their reception at the club, later, you should come down.”
“You’re asking me to your cousin’s wedding?”
“Not like that,” he chuckles nervously as he looks down at you, eyes focused on the task at hand. “Just, haven’t seen you in a week, wouldn’t want to leave you here alone, it could be fun.”
Not to mention the fact he’s been watching the door for the past two days while he’s been home, waiting for you to get back and hoping it would be before the event, and he could figure out some way to ask you.
“You can’t just invite a random person to your cousin’s wedding reception, Luke.”
“She said I could!” He reasons, frowning when you raise a brow at him. “Not a random person, she said I could bring a friend.” He grasps gently at your hands as they straighten the fabric, halting your movements. “We’re friends, right?”
“If you say so.”
That wasn’t a no, he thinks, courage building within him in such a way that he starts to buzz with it. That would definitely have been a flat out no, before.
“You’d be doing me a favour.” He bargains, still holding your hands against his chest. “Quinn and Jack are bringing Josh and Turcs, I’d be like a fifth wheel,”
“So what you’re telling me is that you have no other friends?”
“Sure, if that’s what tugs at your heartstrings.” He has plenty of friends he could ask. Eddy, Duker, Luca - they’re all in town. None of them would look as pretty in a dress as you would, though. He wants to say there’s no chance of any of them kissing him after a few cocktails, but that would probably be a lie. “C’mon, they’re not gonna be checking IDs at the bar,” he wiggles his eyebrows in an attempt to convince you, “The free bar.”
“I don’t have anything to wear to a wedding,”
“What about that blue dress you wore to the formal last year?”
He remembers his throat going dry at just a picture - frosty baby blue silk against glowing skin, hair falling past your shoulders, the prettiest smile he’s ever seen in every photo.
And that is where misplaced courage gets him, he thinks. Letting slip that he has been creeping on your Instagram like some deranged stalker, because where else would he have seen you in that dress? He’d been in Jersey, by then. Scrolling down his timeline and swiping at every photo dump in what he didn’t even realise at the time was an obvious attempt to catch a glimpse of you.
Idiot.
“That was Ellie’s dress. I think she gave it to the Goodwill or something.” You frown, barely even picking up on his slip - unaware to the point that his heart rate can level back out to normalcy.
“You’ve got time to go shopping, you could get another,” he shrugs, reaching into the pocket of his pants. “Here, take my card.”
“Gee, thanks, Daddy Warbucks,” you push at his hand when he attempts to give it to you.
“I’m not adopting you. I’m more like Richard Gere in Pretty Woman.”
“Are you implying I’m a prostitute?”
“No,” he scoffs, only because, unintentionally, he totally was, and now he can’t get the picture out of his head - you in thigh high boots, legs for days stood out of the blue skirt, and the white top with the cutouts, soft summer skin he’s been missing the touch of peaking through - and he starts to wonder if that would be too much too soon to ask of you; to dress up for him like that. Maybe for halloween, if the two of you have progressed past whatever this is, by then. Keep dreaming, Hughes, he can already hear you saying. “More like a sugar baby.”
“I don’t need your money.”
“I’m trying to do something nice for you.”
“You don’t have to buy me things for me to like you.” You pout, and his own lips curl up at your defensiveness - so eager to prove yourself to him over something he isn’t even actually pressing. 
“Because you like me already?” He can’t help himself, a small voice in the back of his mind telling him to push, push, push at your buttons until you practically malfunction - craving you in whatever disoriented state it was that he had seen you in last, pliant and willing and crumbling so nicely for him to scoop up and piece back together. “Because you missed me?”
He shouldn’t want that - want to have to hold you in place, that is, not really - but he does. He wants to be the one that gets you like that. The only one. 
“What time’s the reception?”
That should also have been a flat out no.
Interesting.
You give in so easily, then, to the point where Luke gets giddy, letting you know when and where he wants you - always and anywhere, if he’s honest - and you roll your eyes as you agree, but you stay right in front of him long after you’ve finished with his tie, and he’s so tempted to kiss you that he’s buzzing with excitement. 
He sneaks a kiss to the corner of your mouth - quick enough that you don’t push him away, or make any sort of comment about it, and darts down the stairs at Quinn’s calls for him, leaving you to figure out whatever it is you need to do to be ready for later.
And he thanks his lucky stars that later comes before he has the chance to really dwell on it. His day passes in a blur, the ceremony over in a flash, family photos taken before he even realises he doesn’t need to force a cheesy smile, and only brief moments spared over the course of the early afternoon to think about the things he’s lacking.
As he sits in the church between his brothers, he realises that he wants to be sitting with an arm slung around you and a hand in your lap - your fingers swirling absentminded shapes into his palm as the two of you watch the ceremony side by side. Wants to look down at you staring up the aisle in bewilderment, a soft flush to your cheeks, a dopey grin on your face and a far-off look in your eyes. Wants to mutter stupid jokes in your ear and watch you twist your lips to bite back a giveaway smile. 
As he rides over to the club in the back of Quinn’s car, sandwiched between Alex and Josh with his brothers up front, he thinks he’d kill to have you in his lap - as illegal as that may be, but it’s only 5 minutes, and he’d make sure you were safe with an arm curled around your waist.
And when he’s waiting in the reception hall at the club, the late afternoon ticking into early evening, hearing speeches about falling in love and finding your person, he wants you in the seat beside him. Wants to rest his arm on the back of your chair, play with loose strands of your hair or stroke soft fingertips against your warm skin, and press gentle kisses into your temple.
It’s alarming how quick these thoughts consume him - his college years spent pining, his summer spent basking in whatever attention you choose to give him - and he can’t help but let himself be carried away with the hope of it all, that maybe he is wearing you down enough to give in to such thoughts.
Especially when he sees you walking in, and he swears the world has started moving in slow motion like a scene fresh out of one of those rom-coms you keep trying to subject him to.
His legs stretch without any instruction from his brain, pushing himself up onto his feet until he can make his way over and meet you halfway.
Your eyes light up and your hand lifts in a nervous wave as you start heading straight for him, the action causing the thin spaghetti strap of your dress to fall down your shoulder. 
“Hey,” he breathes out, in what feels like relief, mouth breaking out into a dreamy grin until you’re right in front of him.
“Sorry I’m a little late, it took me forever to find a dress, and then my hair wouldn’t go right, and then the Uber took every back road known to man despite me literally telling him,” Luke reaches to readjust the fallen strap as you talk, fingers trailing ever so slightly against the soft skin of your shoulder, “That I knew a quicker way, and then we ended up at those lights over on Palmer for like 10 minutes, I think I was in that car so long I’m all crinkly.”
His eyes drop slowly down your figure, the silky fabric clinging to your curves in all the right spots, the soft yellow a perfect match to the tie around his neck. “You’re beautiful,” he reassures you with ease, cheeks flushing ever so slightly when your eyes meet his - but he’s used to that, by now, the way his head goes hot when you look at him. “I was gonna get a drink, do you want one?”
He extends his hand out to you in invitation before you even nod in response, and when your fingers slide between his, the heat that is swirling around his head and face starts to spread down, past his neck, into his chest, settling there as the two of you make your way over to the bar. 
This last week without you has been hell.
Sat in his hotel room in Vegas, checking his phone for any sort of update - a text, an instagram post, a story - and wondering if that night before he had left had been playing on your mind the same way it had on his. 
Soft, slow kisses pressed into reciprocated lips, hands memorising every inch of each other’s bodies, desperate but intentional movements into one another. It was hardly his first time, but God, had it felt like it. It was definitely the first time he had ever felt anything that deep for another person - felt so connected, so attached.
And, despite the lingering insecurity that he thinks he might always feel when it comes to you, he knew you felt the same.
You had told him in the simplest terms - you wanted him - but you had shown him so much more. Eyes stuck on his as he moved against you, foreheads pressed together, lips seeking his at every given opportunity, nails scratching at the broad expanse of his shoulders when he had taken the lead and flipped the two of you over. 
Gasps and moans, pleading and pining, begging and singing for him as you came undone for the first, second and third time. 
He doesn’t know how you can possibly even try to carry on pretending you don’t feel even an ounce of the infatuation he does.
Not when you look at him the way you do, eyes sparkling and wanting. Not when he had spent the past week pressing his fingertips into the bruises you had kissed again into the lowest part his stomach like that had become your spot, hoping he could aggravate them enough to linger until you could make some more. 
Not when, even though the two of you have been stood at the bar now for a good few minutes, you haven’t made any efforts to take your fingers from where his are playing with them between the two of you.
“You never answered my question, earlier,” he hums as the two of you wait for your drinks.
“You talk so much, Hughes, you’re gonna have to remind me which question that was.” 
“Did you miss me?” His head tilts with curiosity as he watches the hesitation cross your features, lashes fluttering as you look up at him with your lips pressed together to keep them from spluttering out the truth. “I missed you.” He admits, in the hopes that expressing his candour might elicit the same in you.
“I’m surprised you found the time, you looked very occupied on your brothers’ stories.” Bingo.
“You been keeping tabs on me?” The smirk that accompanies the question is instinctual, and he manages to catch the slight shift in your demeanour before you can retreat, closing his fingers around your hand before you can pull it away. 
“No,” you scoff, and when you pull insistently for him to release your hand, the strap of your dress falls loose down your arm again, Luke’s eyes following before he fixes it for you once more. “Just stumbled across some pictures, I guess,”
“Yeah, you just tripped and fell into stalking me?”
“Don’t act like you weren’t doing the same, I saw those little 3 dots come up so often I was starting to think you were typing up the entirety of War and Peace.”
Which means you’d been lingering in your message thread with him, too. Gotcha.
“You know, the world won’t end if you just admit you missed me.”
“Fine.” It slips out before you know what you’re saying, eyes widening like a deer in the headlights as you realise you’ve already given in. “I missed you.”
He smiles, but doesn’t press, and it’s a smile that lingers as the two of you just look at each other, his eyes drifting down to watch your lips twist and press together, biting back whatever insult or chirp you’re just dying to throw his way to cover up. He waits for it to come, but loves that it doesn’t, and loves even more that you’re holding onto the moment as much as he is. 
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“Do you wanna dance?” Luke asks a while later, once the two of you have gulped down a couple of drinks, have sat with the others for a little, and he’s watched you watch the dance floor with a yearning gaze.
Your eyes meet his after he poses the question, a confidence in his demeanour that has you crumbling immediately.
You nod, allowing him to guide you over to where a few other couples are swaying on the dance floor, and you let him guide you into his arms, one hand in his and the other resting on his shoulder. 
It should be awkward, you think, remembering back on all the times you’ve tried this before. School dances and proms, clumsily shuffling and trying to avoid being stomped on by your partner’s feet - but the two of you move with ease, and you’d like to think it’s because his body knows yours by now.
“This is so weird,” you mutter, eyes cast down to watch his feet move in his fancy Oxford shoes, a soft flush to your cheeks.
“What do you mean?” He asks, nerves heightening as he stiffens like he’s waiting for you to let him go - to step away and cut this short like it doesn’t make you feel the same way. 
“Slow dancing is for old folk like war veterans and millennials.” Your lips twist as your eyes meet his, and his lips turn up into a slow smile, a deep, melodic chuckle following closely behind.
“If you’d rather bump’n'grind on me, I get it,” he smirks.
“You’re such an idiot,” you scoff back, twitching to shake the hair from your shoulder, assuming that’s what is causing the shivers currently shooting down your spine, and not the large, possessive hand resting in the dip of your waist. 
“Y’know, I’ve realised something about you lately,” he starts, voice low as he leans in, angling into your exposed neck and stopping his lips within mere inches of your ear, “You have a tell.”
“A tell?” You turn, brow raised as your gaze meets his, faces close enough that you can feel the soft pants of his breath on your skin.
“For when you’re enjoying yourself more than you think you should be,” he hums, his eyes fluttering a little as they drop to watch your mouth, the swipe of your tongue wetting your lower lip. “You call me an idiot,” his hand on your waist squeezes ever so slightly, your back arching a little into his touch, “Or stupid,” he uses his other hand, the one clutching at yours, to pull you closer, “Or dumb, or a dork.”
You can feel your heart thudding at the call-out, beating in time to the music, in time to the way your bodies sway together, creating it’s own rhythm for the two of you to dance to. 
“Maybe you’re just a stupid, dumb, dorky idiot.” You squeak out, immediately hating the way the words taste in your mouth, your face souring and eyes narrowing in deliberation. There’s no way that was at all convincing, and the smirk that tugs up his lips is all you need to know he sees right through you.
“Maybe,” he humours you, anyway. “And yet, you can’t get enough of me.”
“A smug dorky idiot.” You correct yourself, cutting out stupid and dumb, the sharpness of those words cutting at your tongue like a knife. 
The pointlessness of such discussion almost waters down the exhilaration you feel at being this close to him, in public, nonetheless, where literally anyone else could call you out on your growing tolerance of Luke, could connect the dots regarding all the time the two of you have been spending together and wave the evidence of your growing affection like a chequered flag for all to see.
This definitely feels like you’re crossing the finish line.
And, of course, it’s Jack who does the honours, primed all night to find some way to get between you and Luke upon your arrival, stumbling up to the two of you at the end of the song you’re swaying to and laying a heavy palm on your shoulder.
“Isn’t this cosy?” 
“Fuck off, Jack,” Luke scowls before you get the chance, a pointed glare directed towards his brother, the palming grip at your waist growing faint as you try to wedge a little distance between the two of you, fighting a losing battle with your instinct to run and hide. 
“I need to talk to your girlfriend.”
“I’m not his-,”
“She’s not my-,”
The two of you speak simultaneously, and despite the fact that you were saying the exact same thing, him saying it kind of dampens your mood, putting a good couple of steps between you and Luke with your arms crossing over your chest as you look toward his brother. 
“Whatever. Can I borrow her for a couple minutes?”
“I’m not property, Jack, you can ask me directly.”
“Please can we talk? Alone?”
“Let’s go outside,” you huff, storming off before he has the chance to say anything else and making it all the way outside before he speaks again. 
“Sorry for interrupting, you and Luke looked kind of cute-,”
“What do you want?”
“I’m sorry I said you were messing him around, and that you were toxic.” 
You frown at him, watching as he diverts his gaze to the ground, nervously shuffling on his feet and fingers fidgeting with the cuffs on his shirt. 
“I’m sorry for all the things I said and did at that party, I didn’t mean them, I was just drunk and upset. I shouldn’t have taken it out on you.”
You chew nervously on the inside of your cheeks as he talks, arms wrapped around yourself to shield from the brisk night air, and you watch as Jack starts to unravel before your very eyes.
For as long as you’ve known Ellie, for as long as you’ve known him, you’ve never seen him as anything less than cool, calm and collected - it’s kind of the main thing that grinds your gears about him if your honest, the fact that he never seems real. Like he’s putting on some sort of persona to seem like he has all his shit together, when you know he doesn’t.
“I really like Ellie, you know,” he sighs, and you scoff, because of course you know that. “And I was blaming you for putting this wedge between us when it’s really me that’s been fucking up.” You know that, too. “I’ve been thinking about her this past week, and I really wanna pull myself together and finally do something about it. Stop being such an idiot.”
You bite your tongue from questioning the reality of that. He’ll always be an idiot, you think, but that’s best left unspoken. It’s not even personal to him, that’s just part of being a man.
“She likes you too,” You tell him instead, despite the fact that it goes against all sorts of girl code to do so. You’re doing them both a favour, and the universe should really just let you off, you feel. “I don’t know why either of you have wasted so much time when you’ve both felt the same way all along.”
“You really think she’d say yes if I asked her out?”
“I do,” you shrug, “And it doesn’t need to be done on some romantic boat trip or some crazy elaborate scheme, you should just ask her when she gets back next week. Like as soon as she comes through the door, it will save us all a headache.”
“You sound like Luke.”
“Yeah, well, he’s rubbing off on me, I guess.”
“I don’t need to hear what the two of you get up to when you’re alone, that’s my little brother.”
You reach over and shove at his arm, and for the first time ever, when your eyes meet his, neither of them are narrowed. He’s smiling, and you’re smiling too, and it feels a little like a weight has been lifted from your chest, fresh air filling your lungs.
“Let’s go back inside, Luke’s probably thinking we’ve killed each other.”
“I’m just gonna take a second, it’s kinda stuffy in there.”
Jack nods, before making his way back to the reception, and you make your way over to the fountain, heels working through the gravel until you take a seat on the side. 
It’s a couple of minutes before you hear footsteps, and before you see the fancy oxfords come into your view, eyes roaming up the long, lean body of the boy who has your brain running marathons.   
When your eyes meet, his gaze is warm, and it feels like he can see right through you. Like he’s looking into the depths of your mind, holding a big cheesy sign as he waits at the finish line for your thoughts to come to an end.
He sits wordlessly beside you, his knees knocking against yours, and waits for you to speak - although the silence doesn’t feel awkward, or forced. He waits, patiently and understandingly, and you feel like he’s giving you the time to figure out what you want to say. 
It feels monumental, this moment, like you’re teetering on the edge of something real and honest for the first time in a while.
“The other week, when we,” your voice feels heavy, thick at the back of your throat, “You know,”
“I was strictly advised to forget about it, so no, I don’t know,” he teases, and you’re kind of thankful that he’s trying to ease the tension you’re building for yourself. “But if you wanna jog my memory.” You shove lightly at his shoulder. “I’m kidding. What about it?”
“I’ve never really done that before?”
“What, snuck a guy up to his room in the middle of a house party and rocked his world?”
“Yeah, I guess so.” You scoff, smiling to yourself, despite the weight of all that you’re about to admit to him. “I’ve only ever slept with one other guy, and he wasn’t very nice about it after, so I just,” you frown, “Don’t really do it.”
“You don’t-,” he frowns too, you can see it from your peripheral, eyes till on the hands fidgeting in your lap, “But I thought-,” You look over and meet his eyes, brows furrowed and lips parted in confusion. “What?”
“The first guy, Jamie,” you start, twisting to face him, knees knocking once more. “We started talking in the summer before my freshman year, got to know each other ‘cause he lived one town over from me and he’d come into work all the time, and then when I started college he was a sophomore, and he was the first guy to ever take, like, a serious interest in me. And we had a lot in common, he was on the soccer team, we grew up in the same area, we got on really well, it was the first time I ever really felt connected to anyone like that. But I’d never done anything before, so I wanted to take things slow,”
Jamie Reeves. Captain of the University of Michigan Soccer Team until he tore his ACL at the end of his last year, ruining all dreams of playing in the MLS, like it was entirely achievable for a player of his caliber anyway. You had been infatuated by him, though. The kind of infatuation that a younger you might have doodled little hearts around his name in all your notebooks.
And then he turned out to be a complete leech.
“Please don’t tell me he rushed you into it.” Luke straightens his posture, reaching to place his hand over yours in your lap, the touch immediately comforting, and his concern even more so.
“No. Not exactly.” You sigh, hating how dramatic you feel about the whole thing. “We went on dates, and things were going really well, so I figured I trusted him enough to be my first, then after we had sex he just went really off. He wouldn’t take me out anymore, wasn’t putting any effort in. And then people started asking me all these questions about him, and what we did, and I realised he was going around telling everyone all the details, like I was just some conquest he could tick off to the boys on the team.” You remember how ashamed you had felt, eyes on you in every corridor, whispers about you in every class. You couldn’t leave your dorm without someone muttering some obscene comment about you, and you just felt awful. “Every time one of them saw me they’d make all these dumb comments, and I just felt dirty all the time, like I’d done something wrong. Then I went to a party at Pike, the one at Halloween,” The party that Luke had approached you for the first time since you met, and you had stormed off in tears - not due to him at all, but due to the fact you had just seen Jamie sticking his tongue down someone else’s throat, mere days after you had seen him last. “And he was all over one of the girls on the field hockey team, didn’t even look my way again after that, not that I really wanted him to.”
“You haven’t been with anyone since?”
You shake your head. “Doesn’t stop people saying I have, though. I tried dating a couple times, but it always ended up the same way, rumours being spread about me sleeping around and being easy. And it’s so dumb, ‘cause it’s like I trusted one guy, and somehow it keeps backfiring on me.” You pay no mind, for the first time in a long time, to the crack in your voice as you say it, no longer afraid of showing any hint of vulnerability. Not to Luke. You need to get this out - get it out of the way, once and for all, so you can move past it. Move on, even, with someone you hope won’t treat you the same.
“Does that mean you trusted me?” 
You try not to think too hard about all the times the two of you have shared any level of intimacy - the physical touch mostly initiated by you, and it’s hardly ever on a whim. You think a lot about Luke, if you’re honest. About how he’s honest, and he sticks by his word when he promises not to tell anyone anything. How he always tries to make you laugh or smile, even if it’s something stupid. He isn’t afraid to embarrass himself with you, isn’t afraid to give you power, to let you take the lead. And even though sometimes he jokes otherwise, the times you hang out, he has no ulterior motives. He likes talking to you, likes watching movies with you, likes meeting your eye in a crowded room and giving you one of those smiles that have started to make your heart stutter with something unidentifiable.
“I guess so.” Your shoulder lifts in a nonchalant shrug, your words anything, but. “I don’t know, I’ve been thinking about it since and I can’t explain why it happened but I feel like you and me are-,” 
Connected? Compatible?
You know what he would say you are. You don’t know if you’re there, yet.There are so many things the two of you have become over the past few weeks, so many things you’ve wanted to be for longer than you even realised, so many things you’re afraid to say.
“I feel like out of everyone, you’d have no reason to lie to me. Or about me.”
“I wouldn’t. I didn’t know all that stuff,” he frowns, and it seems like his mind only just makes sense of all the times you threatened him after the fact, making sure he wouldn’t tell anyone that the two of you kissed, or hung out alone in an intimate space and maybe potentially enjoyed yourselves. He had thought you were ashamed of it - but all this time, you’ve been protective. Of yourself, of the trust you were building in him. “Why don’t you tell people, that those guys are all lying?”
“No one would believe me,” you shrug, eyes cast down to where his hand still rests on yours, and his touch prevents you from picking nervously at the skin around your nails.
“I do,” He assures you, “And I promise the next time I hear anyone say any of that stuff about you, I’ll beat their face in.”
“Yeah, you’d drop gloves for me?”
“Look at you with your hockey talk.” He coos, lifting a hand to caress your cheek, where you had barely noticed a tear trailing down until he wipes it away with his thumb, a proud smile tugging at his lips. “Yeah. I would. We’re partners, remember? I’ve got your back.” He extends his pinkie out to you, and you curl yours around it until he’s tugging it toward him, leaning down to press his lips to your knuckle, his kiss like a promise as his green eyes meet yours. 
It doesn’t gross you out, this time. If you’re honest with yourself, it hadn’t the first time he did it, either. It was cute, in an entirely dorky and childish and almost nostalgic way.
And you’re compelled to do the same, leaning and touching your pouted lips to his pinky, eyes fluttering closed as you kiss his skin, the rush of blood to your head somehow louder than the steady stream of the fountain beside you. 
“Listen,” he starts, lowering his hand but keeping your pinkies interlocked, resting them between you both on the stone. “If whatever this is that we’re doing makes you uncomfortable, or brings all that stuff back, I can back off a little.”
Something akin to disappointment floods through your system, your heart rate picking up in a panicked staccato, but you try to stay cool - still, for whatever reason, holding your cards close to your chest. 
“I can make sure my brothers don’t make any more stupid comments about us, they’re doing it to annoy me, not you. And I can,” he takes a deep breath, eyes flickering between yours as if to gauge your desires before he has to reluctantly pander to them. “I can stop, too.”
You nod, because it’s all you can do to shake away the tears threatening to flood your lash line at just the thought of him giving up on you. 
It’s the lump in your throat that blocks the words coming out to tell him as much, and your lips twist in discomfort as you take in the way he’s looking at you - gaze filled with dwindling patience and waining resilience. There’s only so far you can continue to push him, you can see that now, and if you’d have told the version of yourself that first sat down with him all those weeks ago - the version of yourself that refuted any chance of ever warming up to him, that saw him as nothing more than an annoyance, a disturbance to your tips for the day - that the thought of him stopping whatever you have would make you feel like this?
That cold-hearted bitch would have laughed in your face. 
“Hey, lovebirds!” There’s a shout from across the courtyard, and Quinn  appears in the distance with hands cupped around his mouth. The intrusion has you retracting your hand, and you can see the way Luke reacts in your peripheral, a resigned nod given instinctually before he looks over to his brother. “I’m driving home if you two want a ride!”
Luke doesn’t look back at you before pushing himself up, but he offers a hand to help you stand, and the two of you walk in silence to meet Quinn by the exit.
The car ride back to the house is silent, too, save for the soft hum of the radio that filters through the car. Josh sits up front with Quinn, head lulling against the window as he falls asleep worryingly quick, and you’re squished in the middle between Luke and Alex, Jack having stayed back with their parents. It’s hard not to press your legs against Luke’s - his are so gangly and long that they take up more than their fair share of room, and it’s much less awkward despite the circumstances to be touching him than touching Turcs. You feel a lot less tense when you’re touching, anyway. 
And when Quinn pulls up, Luke still helps you out of the car - ever the gentleman, even in the face of apparent rejection.
Quinn and Alex work at lugging an overly inebriated Josh up to his room, leaving Luke to guide you through the house, and the silence starts to become unbearable as he whispers a quick and quiet goodnight, leaving you at the door to yours and Ellie’s room as he makes his way down the hall.
“Hey, Luke,” you call out in a whisper toward him as he retreats, his tall frame turning, a gleam of what you interpret as hope flashing across his green eyes.
“Yeah?” He hums back, voice low as not to disturb anyone else, gaze meeting yours, locking in place with an almost audible click.
“I don’t want you to stop.”
You’re worried for a second you’ll have to expand, that maybe his slightly intoxicated memory doesn’t stretch as far back as to remember the conversation the two of you had had out by the fountain. 
Elaborating on it would be embarrassing to say the least - because what, exactly, are you supposed to say?
I don’t want you to stop flirting with me.
I don’t want you to stop kissing me when no one else is around.
I don’t want you to stop being the only person I can talk to.
I don’t want you to stop bulldozing into my very secure and sturdy walls, thank you very much. They’re starting to tumble down in what could be a very calamitous fashion.
Worried you might have to expose a little more of yourself than you had originally anticipated, you chew at the corner of your lip, waiting.
But then he smiles - in that easy way that makes your bones feel like jelly, your knees weakening to the point that you lean against the still-closed door of your room. In the way that has that loudmouth voice you’re trying too often to suppress within you screaming, God, he’s so cute!
“I know,” he smirks, the bastard, liquid courage running deep through his veins, “Inevitable, remember?”
You scoff, almost instinctively rolling your eyes despite the endeared warmth that floods your belly. “You’re an idiot.”
“I know,” he says again, “You coming?”
And all you can do is nod, biting back a fully-fledged smile before you’re rushing over and slotting yourself under his outstretched arm.
You definitely enjoy him more than you should.
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Living with boys for the first time in your life has taught you a lot over the weeks you’ve been staying at the lake house.
The first is that they’re weirdly messy - in ways that shouldn’t bother you, but they do. It isn’t clothes left around, or dirty plates - but it’s hand soap crusted around the spout by the faucet, shoes kicked off and discarded at random points throughout the house, and they, for some bizarre reason, never put the lid back right on anything.
The second is that they’re loud - and that should have been anticipated. Guys are notoriously obnoxious. But it isn’t just their voices that carry. It’s footsteps up the stairs, stomping in the dead of the night when one of them needs a drink. It’s chewing their food, or slurping their coffee, or scraping the feet of their chairs against the floor when they’re sat at the dining table. It’s tapping their hands on their knees in haphazard rhythm whenever there might be an ounce of peace that they, without a doubt, misunderstand for awkward silence. 
And the third is that they probably couldn’t organise a fire in a match factory. And that goes for a lot of things - the kitchen cupboards, their laundry loads, and, most importantly, one of the many parties they love to throw.
It wouldn’t bother you so much - they usually work out in the end - but this time, it’s Ellie’s birthday, and the way they leave everything until the last minute is about to give you an aneurysm or something. 
There’s no food, no drinks, no cake, no decorations, and the party is tonight.
And Jack, who’s grand idea it had been to throw her a party in the first place, seems to have kidnapped her - disappearing and leaving you to try and figure out what’s going on.
Cole is the one who finds you in the kitchen, spiralling out, frantically trying to put together some kind of list so that one of the guys can go to the store and pick up the bare minimum to throw a party together - and he manages to calm you down - gathers the rest of the guys and helps come up with a plan, sharing out different categories. Quinn and Josh are down to get drinks, Cole and Alex are down to get food, and you and Luke are down for decorations. 
And then within the next five minutes, you’re back up in your room, transferring things from one of your bags into a tote, so you can carry more stuff back to the car without having to bring back a load of plastic, and Luke is sat on your bed, leaning back onto his hands as he watches you, green eyes still tickling your skin with their tangible watch. 
“I know we’re on a time crunch, but could we make another pit-stop at the mall? I still need to find a present for this baby shower.”
“Oh, actually, I made you something.”
“You made me something?” You can feel him watching you as you dig through the bag you’d brought back with you from being home.
“Yeah, I was bored, when you guys were gone, I forgot to give it to you when you got back, got kinda distracted by the whole wedding thing,” you tell him, reaching blindly to try and find the little figure. “I went by that art supply store and picked up one of those kits,” You finally find it, pulling out the little crotchet animal that may or may not have been your fourth attempt. The first had a stubby neck, the second had uneven legs, and you don’t think the third one’s face was anywhere near appropriate to be gifting to a child. This one isn’t perfect, but you’d honestly reached your limit with it. “Don’t make it a thing, it was like therapy while I was back home to be honest.”
“Oh that’s adorable.” He pouts, accepting it from you and immediately turning it back, bobbing it’s head as if to greet you. “Why a giraffe?”
“Long neck,” you smile, reaching out to pat it. “Reminded me of you.”
“Ha ha,” he rolls his eyes, but the laughter feels real enough. “She’ll love it.”
“She?” It slips out by instinct before you can check yourself, eyes widening as his meet yours again, his lips twitching in the corners. “Thought you said it was for your captain,”
“It is.” He smirks, “Men can’t carry babies last time I checked.” 
You nod, because of course men can’t carry babies. Of course the shower is for the mother of the baby - who you vaguely remember Jack and Luke talking about - someone who works with them back in Jersey. Someone they’re both close to, clearly, if Luke’s stressing this much about a gift.
“Wait, are you jealous?”
“No.” You scoff, frowning purposefully, lips turning down in forced denial.
“You’re jealous.”
“Am not.”
“You want to take this back now, huh?” He holds the giraffe in a way that it bends, adorably, like he’s trying to taunt you with it, and it’s wonky eyes do little to distract from the charm he gives it.
“Nope.” You shrug, “You can give it to whatever girl you want, doesn’t bother me at all.”
“Of course not,” he stands, stepping toward you slowly, “You couldn’t care less what I do away from this house, right?”
“Right.” You gulp, looking into soft green eyes, your legs starting to wobble at the knees, strength and integrity waining as the seconds pass. You really don’t know why you’re still keeping this game up. Ever since that night of the wedding, you’ve been sneaking off into Luke’s room as soon as Ellie falls asleep. You fall asleep by his side, and he wakes you when he gets up early, so you can sneak back without Ellie realising you’ve even gone.
You’ve kissed him every day, sometimes tender, sometimes torrid - over the centre console of his car when he drops you off at work, in his bed before you drift off to sleep, in the kitchen when you sneak off under the ruse of refilling your drink. He can tell the difference between the flavours of lip balms you wear, comments on it like he has a little ranking system filed away somewhere in the back of his mind. You both whisper your secrets in the dark of the night, and you had promised him that you would try to open yourself up more to him.
“I thought we were past this,” he hums, stepping closer, voice low in a way that buzzes through your bones. “Thought we were being honest with each other, now.”
“Honest?” You ask, voice weak, neck craning now to look up at him, eyes boring into your own as he advances on you. 
His hand reaches to cup your jaw, to tilt your head just that bit further, and presses his lips straight to yours instead of elaborating any further.  
He’s tentative, at first. Gentle, even. Fingertips ghosting along the side of your neck, pulling you closer, less with any physical force and more so with pure magnetic attraction, your skin humming - buzzing, even, to be touched by him in any which way. 
Your chin tilts as your mouths slot together in a soft, slow kiss, and when his lips touch yours, everything else fits perfectly into place. The fingers of his left hand press firmly into the flesh of your hip, now, using a slight force to manoeuvre you how it suits him - as close as he can physically get you - and those on his right reach around enough to slightly curve towards the back of your neck, applying just enough pressure so that your chin angles upward to deepen the kiss, his tongue pressing a pleading invitation into your bottom lip.
An invitation you immediately grant him, your hands finding their place on his body with ease, one flat against the warm expanse of his chest and the other matching his, soft fingertips grazing the skin of his neck until they tangle in the slight overgrowth of curls at the nape.
Everything feels so fluid, so effortless, and yet, so new - like this is the first time you have kissed, an eruption of fresh feelings bursting through you. There’s still a familiarity that lingers - one of ease, where it’s like your bodies have each other mapped out, already. You know every cell of him and he of you, and it’s evident in the way the moment escalates.
Your bodies naturally gravitate towards the nearest surface, his fingers reaching out behind your hip to soften the blow of him pushing you into the dresser, your back arching, feet moving in sync as not to tangle and trip, or stumble and break the kiss.
But there’s nothing else clumsy about it.
He lifts you with ease, the cold surface only a slight shock to the system, and it brings you to the perfect height where he can seamlessly move his kisses from your lips, past your jaw, down your neck and into the crevice of your collarbones, leaving a trail of the sticky residue of your lip balm. 
Strong hands cup your thighs, parting your legs until he can stand between them, and your fingers bury themselves into his curls, pushing into him however you can. 
When his fingers graze the inside of your thigh, his lips part from the hot skin of your clavicle, and his head tilts slightly until his darkened green eyes meet yours.
“Please,” you breathe out before he can even ask, beyond caring for whatever particles of pride you’ve been desperately trying to cling to when you watch his lips curve slowly into the most panty-dropping smirk you think you’ve ever seen.
“Please what?”
Your lips part as if by instinct, a biting remark fizzling out on the tip of your tongue as your mind works for some kind of comeback, for some semblance of resistance to whatever this version of him is, but there’s nothing. Just a frantic plea for him to do anything to you. Whatever he wants.
Your hips shuffle forward as if led by a mind of their own, trying to force his hand up, only for him to follow the movement of your thigh.
“Touch me,” you find yourself pouting, spikes of heat flashing through you at the way you can see the thoughts crossing his mind, of all the ways in which he can torture you - putty in the palm of what you thought were safe hands.
“Tell me you were jealous,” he prompts, leaning forward to press a teasing kiss to your lips, “Tell me that the thought of me even talking to another girl makes your skin crawl.”
Don’t let him get cocky, a voice prevails in the back of your mind, despite the accuracy of his words. Tell him he’d have to have an ounce of game for you to be remotely worried, tell him the only thing that makes your skin crawl is his incessant need to mouth off all the time. Tell him, tell him, tell him!
“I was jealous,” you breathe out instead, chasing the victorious smirk that stretches across his lips in the hopes you can kiss it away.
Jealous of a girl you’ve never met, in a relationship with another man, pregnant with his child, not remotely interested in Luke.
A girl who gets to see him all the time, who knows him probably in ways you might never, who he cares enough about to want to gift her something meaningful. Who he casually texts and smiles at his phone as he’s doing so, who he and Jack talk affectionately about in ways they’ll never talk about you.
You’ve officially lost it. 
“And if you don’t touch me in the next 3 seconds,” you carry on, scrambling to claw back one single iota of your dignity, your hands gripping at his broad shoulders, “I won’t let you touch me again.”
Luke laughs. Practically snorts at you, eyes crinkling in the corners in pure amusement. Your dignity is long gone.
“1,” you start, your voice shakier than you’d ever like it to be, and his hands move to either side of your hips, clutching at the edge of the dresser.
“2,” you didn’t think you could sound worse than before, definitely longer than a second ago, but you’re quickly proven wrong as you watch him leverage that grip to push himself upright, creating a distance between the two of you that drains all the heat from your body.
“3.” he finishes, taking a step back and watching you with unadulterated hunger in his eyes, daring you to follow through with your threat - and the smug idiot knows you won’t.
He knows it’s coming, even anticipates the way in which you pounce on him, arms ready to catch you when you throw yourself down onto the ground in front of him, landing with a quick thud that jolts you straight into him. Hands at either side of his face pull him down, and he does half of the work in bending his back so it isn’t as clumsy. 
You tangle yourself up in him, legs twisting between each other until you’re stumbling toward the bed, and it’s as soon as you get your fingers back into his hair, as soon as his hands are pushing your top up, grazing at the warm skin of your back, that you hear a call of your name.
You falter back from him just as the door swings open, managing to create a reasonable amount of distance as Ellie swaggers in, voice still raised as she asks, “Have you seen my-,” It’s Luke that she sees first, eyes zeroing in on his flushed face with pin-point accuracy, her brows furrowing as she takes him in, heaving chest and messy hair and all. “Lip gloss?”
Lip gloss? Is she joking? 
“You came all the way back up here for lip gloss?” You ask, still slightly breathless and brain fogged, and feeling very much like you’ve just put all your chips on the table and watched them get swept away in seconds. 
You watch as Ellie’s eyes dart to Luke’s mouth, watch him grow conscious of the balmy coating smeared across his lips, and you feel your heart stop in it’s place, your chest squeezing in anticipation of a thump thump thump that doesn’t come.
“No,” she mutters, diverting her attention back to you with a sobering shake of her head. “Balm,” she corrects, “The kind with SPF, I think I’m burning, I didn’t realise me and Jack were gonna be gone all morning.”
“Uhm, yeah,” you breathe, reaching up to tuck your hair behind your ears in the hopes it helps cool your head down, some. “I have some in my bag.”
Your tote is on the dresser you had just been placed on yourself, and you use the opportunity to dig through it to will the burning sensation in your ears away, levelling out your breathing as you root around for a tube of lip balm you know is in there somewhere.
“Could you check for my car keys, too? I was thinking we could drop by the mall for lunch. Catch up” She adds, with a forced wiggle of her brows, clearly what she had actually come up here for, and you fish those out too, throwing them across to her. “Quinn’s looking for you before you go, Luke, something about a list.”
“I should go check what he wants,” Luke mumbles, putting another few steps of distance between you before he offers an awkward wave, and departs the room with heavy feet that you hear stomp all the way down the hall, the last thing you see of him being a skinny, lopsided crochet giraffe poking out of his back pocket.
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Apparently Jack’s plans of keeping some element of surprise for the party had gone out of the window as soon as he had got her alone - and you’re kind of grateful for the fact.
Keeping secrets from Ellie is stressful - you of all people would know, you’ve somehow managed to keep a pretty big one from her all summer - and she usually has a way of figuring things out on her own.
You probably would have folded to her - just the two of you out together, sipping smoothies in the food court at the mall - if he hadn’t already filled her in one the plans for the night. 
It makes up a little for his lack of effort, earlier - especially now that your hands are clear of it. You don’t know how much you trust the guys to put something together while you and Ellie are looking for an outfit for her, but you have no choice but to leave them to it. Jack had reassured you he had everything under control, and despite the absurdity of that statement, it’s nice for that panic you had been feeling earlier to have been flushed away.
“I think tonight’s the night,” Ellie sighs dreamily, elbow resting on the table and her chin in the palm of her hand, “We had this really deep conversation while we were out walking, and he pretty much told me he has feelings for me, he was really nervous, it was kind of cute.”
“I’ll take your word for the cute thing,” you chuckle, sipping at your smoothie and smiling at how happy she looks. It’s nice to hear, her having hope about the situation for once, instead of dread or fear. 
“He said you two spoke at his cousin’s wedding,”
“It was nothing,” you shrug, “He didn’t need any interference from me to realise he likes you, El, he just needed a nudge.”
“I can hardly call you out on interfering,” her lips twist, nervously, “I’ve kind of been doing the same.”
“What do you mean?”
“Why do you think I’ve been hanging out with Cole so much all summer?”
“Cole?” You frown, leaning back into your chair, “You’ve lost me.”
When you’d last spoken to Ellie about Cole, she had told you they just got along, and there was nothing more to it - and you had no reason to believe otherwise. When you and Luke had been in the midst of your own interference, and you had been playing third wheel to their hangouts, they had been getting along. Almost like siblings. Cole never flashed her those flirty winks or toothy grins that he gave everyone else. 
“He’s into you.” She says, finger swiping in the ring left behind from her smoothie cup on the table, “And I was kind of giving him advice on how to approach you. I figured you wouldn’t mind, ‘cause he’s like your normal type, and you seemed like you liked him-,”
“I’m sorry, you think I like Cole?” 
You’re taken aback. You don’t remember giving any sort of indication you were ever into Cole Caufield.
Maybe you could have been, before this summer - would have probably fallen victim to his cheeky smiles or his teasing banter. He’s probably closer to your usual type, if you even have one. Confident, with a presence that sort of demands attention. But you realise, now, your attention should be earned - in more than just a flash of cute teeth and boyish features.
In dumb jokes told just to bring you out of a bad mood, and a car with the AC dialled up waiting for you after a shift on a hot day. In hands that offer you help before you ever have to ask, and eyes that see so far beyond what version of yourself you try to put out there.
You could have liked Cole, in another world, or another life, if another boy wasn’t around. 
“I did until I walked in on you kissing Luke, earlier.”
You blink slowly at her, mouth agape as she stares blankly back. 
What the fuck?
“I wasn’t kissing Luke,” you scoff, denial making your face twist in funny ways that you can even feel look deranged. “We were talking.”
“Into each other’s open mouths?” She snickers, “Unless he’s been digging around in our stuff when we’re not around, I can’t think of any other reason he’d have left the room with Summer Fridays Vanilla Beige smeared all over his lips.”
“It was Brown Sugar, actually.” You correct her, guiltily, hoping the words you mutter next through pouted lips don’t quite make it to her ears. “He says it’s sweeter.”
“Oh my God.” She guffaws, mouth agape and eyes wide in realisation. “How long has this been going on?”
“Nothing’s going on,” you deny, although you can feel heat creeping up your neck, already. “We just get along-,”
“We get along, and you don’t welcome me home with an open mouth.”
“Ellie-,”
“Listen, he’s not just some guy that you can mess around with, he’s way deeper into you than you probably realise, and-,”
“I like him, okay?” you blurt out, voice just loud enough to be heard over her rambling but not enough to carry anywhere else, and the silence that follows is almost deafening - prolonged in a way that you can’t even remember if you said anything, or not.
But the way Ellie is looking at you tells you enough.
Why is everyone so caught up on you breaking his heart?
As if you aren’t putting the entirety of yours on the line.
“Luke?” She asks, like the two of you haven’t just been talking about him. “You like Luke Hughes?”
“Yeah,” you sigh, leaning onto your elbows and pressing the palms of your hands to your face, eyes scrunching tight to try clear up some mind space to make sense of what it is you’re admitting to.
It makes sense already, to you. Verbalising it is the problem.
He’s charming, he’s funny, he makes you laugh, most times unintentionally but that doesn’t make your feelings dwindle in the slightest. 
He’s weirdly passionate about that one horse movie and won’t shut up trying to get you to watch it with him, but it’s endearing in a way that you want to kiss him to shut him up. Or maybe even watch it, God forbid.
He literally never stops eating, but it’s like his body is in tune to yours now, and he always makes double if he feels like you might be hungry so you don’t ever have to ask, which is weirdly sweet.
When you lay beside him in the middle of the night, you don’t feel pressured to do anything other than talk.
And when you do, he listens to you - retains information and checks up in a way that makes you feel seen, makes you feel a way you haven’t in a really long time. He doesn’t talk over you, or dismiss your feelings, or try to change the topic when things go a little too deep or get a little heavy. He shares the load, asks questions that make you think and process things in a new way, and he isn’t patronising when he does so. He doesn’t say things that sound like they’re straight out of a Psych 101 textbook like your feelings are valid or what makes you think that?
And he compares your wildly different worlds in a way that doesn’t feel like a competition. His troubles aren’t worse than yours, his life isn’t harder.
You’re equals.
You’ve never felt like anyone’s equal, not even Ellie.
It’s like with all the other parts of your life that make you hurt, make you feel small and insignificant - they fade away when you’re with Luke.
His corner of your world is bright - despite the seemingly inexhaustible snark-meter constantly ticking between you two - it’s easy, doesn’t weigh down on you or make your chest feel tight, not in that way, at least.
You’ve been introduced to a whole new influx of feelings in your chest by Luke.
You can give in to the ugly side of yourself that wants to bite at him until there’s nothing left, to push whenever he gets a little too close, and you don’t have to worry that you’ll scare him off or push too far, ‘cause he’ll just pull you with him and bite back - only, it doesn’t hurt like when anyone else does it. Somehow, you think he savours the parts that other people might spit out - chews and swallows and rubs at his belly in satisfaction like you’re the best meal he’s ever had. 
Despite all the other things that have shattered your heart, Luke Hughes makes it feel whole, again.
And it should make you feel sick - lovey-dovey stuff like that usually does, your walls shooting straight up at the first sign of affection from anybody, metaphorical sneakers on and carrying your legs as far and as fast as they can run - but this doesn’t.
You don’t want to run from Luke, not really.
“I thought you said he was dorky and annoying.”
You’re pretty sure she had been the one to say that, at some point, but you don’t remember arguing the fact, so you don’t bring it up.
“He is.” You pout. He’s also apparently inevitable. “He kinda crept up on me, I guess.”
Ellie is quiet for a minute as she watches you, eyes narrowing as she takes you in - shoulders slumped, lips pouted, defeated.
“Why not just tell him, then? Why hide it?” She asks, leaning onto the table too until your faces are level when you peak up at her, “You know he likes you back, right? He’s got the biggest crush on you, it’s borderline problematic.”
“I don’t know, I don’t really understand why he likes me.”
“Does it matter?”
It does. You don’t want to keep running, but you can’t really help it. There’s something ingrained deep within you that is trying to shelter yourself from all the ways in which succumbing to these feelings will inevitably hurt you.
“Luke’s way smarter than me, and he’s way more successful, he’s kind and he’s generous, he comes from a great family, has this great house, we have literally nothing in common, and he doesn’t see that now because he just thinks he’s attracted to me, and he likes that I don’t just fold to him because he’s some superstar, but the second that’s gone,” you sigh, trying to swallow down the hurt in your voice, blink away the onslaught of tears, “He’ll just get bored of me like everybody else does, and then he’ll be gone. And I’ll just be some girl he broke up with and left behind, and that’s all I’ll ever be.”
Ellie frowns, a strained mutter of your name called as her hand falls to yours in an attempt to comfort you. “You’ll never know if you don’t try, babe.”
“No, I know.”
It’s all you’ve ever known.
Men who start off treating you like some prized possession - cherishing you, making you feel valued and loved - and the second the shine wears off, the second something even newer, even brighter, even sparklier, crosses their path, they’re gone.
And you’re left behind wondering what it is about you that keeps driving them to leave.
It happened with your dad, with his new wife and their perfect kids - the boys he always wanted, who he never had to force himself to like. The dream family he abandoned you to pursue. It happened with Jamie, with all the girls he saw after you, with the way he never even looked your way again, even after all the secrets you shared, and the promises he made. With all those other boys who never saw you as anything more than a fabricated story to spread for a few brownie points with their buddies in the locker room.
It will happen again.
These feelings you have for Luke - the comfort he gives, the contentment, the ease in conversation, the warmth he bathes you in until your skin prunes and he seeps in through the cracks - they’re better kept to yourself. It’s easier that way, to keep this whole heart under lock and key, not giving anyone a chance to break parts off and keep it for themselves.
It’s almost perfect the way it is.
Safe, even from the clutches of the boy who pieced it back together, brick by laborious brick.
“There isn’t long left of the summer, anyway,” you go for a nonchalant shrug, but your shoulders feel heavy, and it turns out more like an arduous huff. “I doubt he’s shy of female attention back in Jersey, he’ll forget I ever existed before he even knows it.”
“You should talk to him,” Ellie suggests, “At least let him know where you stand, even if it’s to tell him things can’t go further.” 
The thought of it is too daunting. Looking into those gleaming green eyes and laying your heart on the line.
You can pretend all you want to Ellie, to yourself, even, that you wouldn’t want more, but you don’t think you could keep up the show with him.
“He deserves at least that.”
And damn it, she’s right.
Maybe he even deserves a proper chance.
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Luke never thought he’d regret kissing you for any reason, but he’s wishing he had practiced some restraint up in your room, earlier.
If he hadn’t advanced on you, had let you pack your bag and got you out of the house before Ellie and Jack got back, he could have followed through on his plan of action for the day.
A plan he’d been hyping himself up for, all week - getting you on your own, talking things out, maybe even asking you out. Properly. Not just dinner at the mall, but a real date. Planned, perfected. A fancy dinner, or a trip to the movies. A picnic blanket laid out somewhere with a nice view, and an abundance of your favourite snacks. 
He wants to kiss you without having to hide it, anymore.
He wants to walk with you tucked under his arm. Wants to have you in his lap when there’s too many people over at the house, and the group are struggling for space on the couches in the den. 
He also sort of wants peace of mind, but what’s that compared to not having to sneak around, anymore. 
He’d made his mind up in the morning, waking up beside you at 5am, rousing you from your sleep with soft mutterings of your name, and lips pressed to your cheek until he could feel you smile. 
“Hi,” your voice had been croaky, and your movements slow, shuffling against him as your skin became illuminated by the soft glow of the rising sun slipping through the gap in the curtains. Your legs had been tangled with his under the sheets, and you did little to untangle them, and he was tempted to lock his so that you couldn’t. 
“Hey,” he mumbled, lips still moving against your skin, nipping at your cheek, your jaw, your throat, and your fingers rose until they clutched at the back of his hair, curls wrapping around them as you held him in place. 
“What time is it?”
“Around five,” his own hands landed on your waist, slipping under the hem of your tank, and trying to savour the warmth of your skin, your body hot from being against his all night. “Figured you’d need to be a little earlier today with it being Ellie’s birthday and all.”
“Thank you,” you used your soft grip on his curls to tug, until his face left the crook of your neck, and you blinked softly, smiled sweetly, and he felt his heart beat at twice the normal speed. You leant up and kiss him, straight on the lips, and he smiled against you just as you pulled away. 
He felt cold all over as soon as you detached yourself, and he rolled onto his side to watch as you stood, arms raised to stretch and lifting the bottom of your tank top to rise up your belly.
He felt robbed. Like he deserved longer with you, and it had been as you crawled back over your side of his bed, and had kissed him once more before leaving, that he had decided he needed to do something about it.
His original plan had been to steal you away at some point in the night, everyone else too distracted by the party to notice or care, but being teamed up with you to go get decorations seemed like it would work too.
Until Jack came back and fucked his plans up.
Jack said that he would go get the food with Turcs, that he had already paid for a cake, and he had to show his ID when he picked it up. He said Ellie shouldn’t have to do anything, and that you would be the best person for her to do nothing with, which left Luke picking up decorations with Cole.
It wasn’t that he minded Cole’s company, but Cole isn’t you.
He probably could have tucked Cole under his arm as they walked side by side through target and picked up a bunch of of banners and streamers, given the logistics of their height difference, but it wouldn’t have been as cute.
He has managed to get a lot of unexpected information though. And of course, his only thought is that he can’t wait to share it with you. 
Cole tells Luke how he and Ellie have only been hanging out all summer to make Jack jealous.
He bites his tongue to refrain from telling him that sort of trick doesn’t work on his brother, but Cole seems too pleased with himself for Luke to rain on his parade, and he finds it kind of funny that everyone’s been working to get the two of them to wake up to their feelings, not just you and him.
Cole might have even ended up putting more effort into it than you and Luke did, acting as a go-between for Jack and Ellie, and raising the stakes for both of them to make a move.
“And what do you get out of any of that?” Luke chuckles as he works at taking the banners out of their plastic wrapping, Cole taking the plastic and putting it straight into the trash.
The smile drops as soon as Cole says your name, though, and Luke’s hands stop in place. “Ellie’s been giving me insider info. I’m primed and ready to make a move.”
“Wait, I’m sorry,” Luke frowns, “You like her? Since when?”
He tries not to let the panic stirring in his chest reflect on his features, but it’s hard. 
Cole and Ellie had been hanging out for a long time, now. He can’t have been into you that whole time, right? Not without saying anything to anyone else - Cole is kind of mouthy, like that. Word would have got back around to Luke if Cole’s liked you for months. 
“Since I met her. She’s a really cool girl, really funny.” Cole scoffs, hand reaching out for more trash. “And she’s, like, one of the hottest girls I’ve ever seen, you know?”
Of course Luke knows. He’s seen the most beautiful sides to you - soaked head to toe from a garden hose, eyes crinkled from laughter, or the aftermath, curled up on a couch with just-dry hair and heart opening up to him for the very first time. In an orange baseball cap and a Mets jersey, twirling as you exit one of the fitting rooms you had found in the mall, a big cute grin on your face as you allow yourself to dorky with Luke, and only with Luke. Sat out on the fountain at the club, skin bathed in the glistening moonlight and your heart thumping in the palm of his tender hands. Laid beside him in the early hours of the morning, soft snores falling from between your lips and hair splayed out against his pillow.
But he can’t exactly say that to Cole - who has apparently been working to pursue you this entire time without Luke ever catching on.
“Ellie says I’m her type, so I don’t know why I’m stressing about asking her out-,”
“Out like on a date? Like you want to date her?”
Luke knows he sounds like an idiot without Cole giving him the weirded-out look he gives, but he’s starting to lose out to the dread that is flooding the pit of his stomach. He stumbles to follow Cole out of the kitchen and into the living room, where they had set up a step ladder before to hang the decorations.
“You really think I’d be trying so hard if I didn’t?” Cole scoffs, “Catch up, Luke, I’m trying to end my summer with a girlfriend-,”
“She’s hardly girlfriend material.”
The words taste sour in the mouth that moves before his brain has time to think - sour enough that he has to try not to grimace, wishing he could suck them back in and swallow them back down like they never came out. 
“What do you mean?” Cole asks, his features dropping into a frown. “I thought you two were getting along.”
“We are,” he agrees, despite it seeming like an understatement, but words are starting to pour out before he can filter them, and he can already feel himself getting carried away. “And she’s a nice enough person, don’t get me wrong, but I just don’t think it would work out with her like that.”
“You think she’d be hard work?”
He knows you are. But he likes you that way. He doesn’t want anyone else to worm their way into your good graces like he has. 
“Yeah,” he huffs, “She’s always out, and always flirting with guys at the club, you’ve seen it.” He knows he’s pulled that out of his ass, but what else is he supposed to say?
“I think she’s just fishing for tips, Lukey,” Cole chuckles, and Luke’s cheeks flush with humiliation at the pet name. He feels small, like he’s just something that Caufield can steam roll straight over without much protest. “Can’t blame her, some of those guys have deep pockets.”
“I’ve just heard stuff, you know.”
“Like what?”
Jesus Christ, Cole, he thinks, wishing he’d just take his word for it and get over you, already. As if it would ever be that easy. He doesn’t particularly enjoy saying these things out loud - using the words you had so carefully confided in him against you - but there’s a panicked desperation creeping up within him, becoming possible to ignore, and it’s cancelling out all other rational thoughts in his brain. 
The second you find out Cole Caufield is interested, you’ll no longer have any need for Luke.
Luke, who your every conversation with starts or ends with some sort of bickering argument, who annoys you to no end, who riles you up like it’s what he was put on this very Earth to do.
Cole is charming, he’s always had an ease when it comes to talking to girls that Luke never quite found in himself, and he’ll win you over in no time - and that’s if you aren’t interested, already.
But Luke is building up to that.
He’s been building up to it all summer.
Even before then, without entirely knowing it. 
The two of you have something, even if you refuse to admit it. You wouldn’t have kissed him all those times, otherwise, wouldn’t have come to his bed in the middle of the storm those weeks ago, and almost every night since he came back from Vegas, wouldn’t have slept with him before he left, wouldn’t have begged him to give in to you - not if you weren’t interested in him.
You’ve shared parts of yourself he knows no one’s ever seen, and he can’t let that be for nothing. 
But now the rug is being pulled out from under him, and all he can do to cling on to the edges with an idiotic possessiveness that curls his upper lip and brings his heart to a screeching stop. 
“Like how she’s with a different guy every week at Michigan. Apparently she gets around.”
“Oh,” Cole frowns, and Luke watches as his face turns, his own fists clenching at the urge to take it all back, to defend her and call Cole out on his immediate shift despite it being his own fault. 
He’s made his bed, now. He has to lie in it.
“Ellie didn’t mention all that stuff.”
“She’s hardly gonna call her friend easy.” Luke scoffs, and he thinks the way the words are spat out of his mouth is some sort of reflection of the way his lips don’t want to say them. Like they’re disgusted that his brain would even conceptualise them enough to be spoken. “Especially when you were doing her a favour with the whole Jack thing.”
“I don’t know man, I think you’ve got the wrong idea of her.”
Luke rolls his eyes as Cole makes his way back toward the step ladder, banner in hand, jaw tensing as he scrambles to think of something to stop this.
“She’s not the kind of girl you date,” he manages to call out, despite the tremor in his voice, every fibre of his being fighting the words from being spoken. “And there’s like a month left before we all leave for camp, so if you were to start anything, it would just be for the summer, anyway.”
“Jack and Ellie have started something with just a month left.”
“That’s not the same thing, they’ve been into each other for years, they text and call all the time, nothing’s really changing for them except for a label, you really think you’re gonna keep that up after just a couple months of knowing her?”
He reaches out for the other end of the banner and holds it as Cole positions his side, lip tugged between his teeth and a frown on his face as he mulls Luke’s words over. 
“You’ll be in Montreal, and she’ll be here, and you’ll be focusing on hockey, and training, and you won’t have time to keep up something serious with a girl you barely know.”
He tries not to think about how it’s the same distance to Jersey - an almost 2 hour flight - and how he’d be doing the exact same thing, swept up into the season before he knows it and potentially doing nothing but letting you down. 
“And you know what she’s like, she’d find something to argue about with a monk, for God’s sake,” he scoffs, brows furrowed so hard he can feel the tension in his forehead, “All you’d get from her is an earache. She’s not worth it.”
Cole turns to narrow his eyes at Luke, but something else over the top of his head catches his attention, instead, and the surprised muttering of your name turns Luke’s blood to ice.
Frozen in place, eyes wide, heart thudding in his ears, he waits with bated breath for something to happen - for Cole to break into a shit-eating grin, and tell him he’s just fucking around. For the ground to swallow him up. For anyone - literally anybody else - to respond.
But your voice carries straight over to him. Travels through his ears, ricochets around the cavern of his skull, shoots down his spine and makes his legs go numb.
“We uhm,” your tone is shaky, and Luke, for the first time, maybe, ever, hates the way you sound. “We were just checking if you needed a hand with the decorations.”
He turns slowly, and it’s Ellie’s eyes he meets first. Pointed, narrowed, betrayed, even, she glares at him like he’s just kicked a wounded animal right in front of her. 
“You can’t decorate your own party,” Cole laughs from behind Luke, as Luke’s attention drifts slowly your way. 
His eyes meet yours, and he can see the watery glaze over them from across the room. Can see your throat working to gulp down your hurt as your lips twist.
Ellie says something in response, and he vaguely hears Cole speak too, but all that he can focus on is the blood rushing around his head, a whooshing and whirring that makes him feel like his ears are about to pop, or his brain is about to explode. His lips part to speak, to say something, anything, to explain what you had clearly overheard, but your gaze drops to the floor, and he sees your walls build back up right before his eyes, brick by brick, cementing themselves back in place.
He’s such an idiot.
He’s such a monumental asshole.
The last time he had seen tears in your eyes had been sat by the fountain at the club - he had wiped them away, and had promised you he had your back, and you had just caught him having anything but with Cole. And all that after you had told him why you had ever been hesitant to let anyone in the first place.
He doesn’t think he’s ever messed up like this.
He steps forward, unsteady on his feet, and you step back, still not able to look him in the eye again, before turning on your heel and making your way upstairs.
Luke hears the stomp of your feet as you go, watches Ellie go after you, wishing it could be him, and stands, motionless, until he feels a firm pat on his back.
“Don’t worry, man,” Cole says, “She’s cool, she’ll be over it after a couple of drinks.”
Luke doesn’t even think he says anything coherent when he responds, a grunt or a grumble - it can’t have been words, because he can’t even form them in his brain. 
“I’m gonna ask her out tonight, anyway,” Cole chuckles, “So what you said won’t even mean anything.”
Great.
He’s just fucked things up with one of the greatest people in his life, the girl of his dreams, and it doesn’t even mean anything.
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Not the kind of girl you date. 
Not worth it.
All that from the boy who supposedly had your back not that long ago. The first guy in a long time, maybe even ever, to make you feel secure, and safe, and like you could trust someone again.
Luke thinks you’re an earache. 
He thinks you’re argumentative, and only worthy of a brief, summer fling - that keeping up anything with you when he goes home would be a waste of the time and energy he should be dedicating to hockey.
And he’s probably right, you think.
It’s only what you’ve been telling yourself in the back of your mind all summer. Self-deprecating thoughts about how he’s far too good for you, and you’re only interesting when he can’t have you, and he’ll get tired of you before you can even realise he’s already drifted off.
Ellie had told you all the way back in your freshman year that the two of you weren’t a good fit. Jack had been telling Luke the same all summer. And you had only just managed to convince yourself otherwise on the drive back to the lake house from the mall.
You can hardly blame him for being two steps ahead.
You think that’s why you can’t bring yourself to cry - the sting of tears prickling persistently but never pushing through, eyes watering so much you can’t even put on mascara without the fear of it trickling down your face and ruining the rest of your makeup.
You’d tried crying, before. Had ran up to your room and had sat on the other side of your bed, hidden from the door and knees pressed to your chest. Your breath had stuttered, and your lips had trembled, but the tears wouldn’t fall, try as you might to have made them.
And when Ellie had found you, had sat beside you with an arm stretched over your shoulders, you had tried, then, too.
And it would be your luck that as soon as you press the inky substance into your lashes that they would finally fall, so you’ve been sat trying to wish them away for the past ten minutes - the tube clutched in a death grip in your hands as you sit at the makeshift vanity you and Ellie had set up all those weeks ago when you had moved in, taking deep breaths and willing the hurt to go away.
It’s where Luke finds you after knocking with no response - you barely remember hearing it - shuffling wordlessly into the room and perching himself down behind you on the edge of the bed.
You see him in the mirror, your eyes darting away before his can meet them in the reflection, and you stiffen your shoulders, bracing yourself for the blow.
“I didn’t mean any of what you heard.”
You breathe out a humourless chuckle, bitterness settling into the pit of your stomach and your lips trembling with resistance. 
“I mean it, I don’t think those things about you, I promise, I-,”
“It doesn’t even matter,” you cut him off with a roll your eyes, pushing the mascara tube toward the mirror and figuring you’re just gonna go without. 
“I was panicking, and it just came out like word vomit, and I feel really sick about it, and really stupid, and I wish I could take it all back-,”
“I said it doesn’t matter.” You meet his eyes this time, trying not to fall for just how distraught he looks behind you in the mirror. 
“Of course it matters,” he frowns, and you look away as soon as he pushes himself up, knowing he’s coming for you. “I need you to know that I would never have said those things-,”
“You said them, Luke,” you scoff, “What do you mean you would never have said them, you literally did.”
“I know-,”
“It doesn’t matter-,”
“Can you stop saying that!” He frowns, appearing at the side of you, hands gripping your shoulders to get you to face him. “I’m trying to explain this to you, I’m trying to fix things, and you’re-,”
“What, giving you an earache?”
All those weeks ago, the backs of your legs sticking to the bench in the booth in the restaurant, leaning over the table and sparring back and forth with him, you had convinced yourself that he liked it.
That the glint in his eye was indication of as much, the twitch at the corner of his lips, the way he would bite back without a second to think about it, and had matched your every effort to get one over on him. 
You had thought the two of you had something real. Something you had never found with anyone else. Quick wit, and similar senses of humour, shared boundaries, a mutual level of respect. 
You had thought his persistence had been something that would stick.
And clearly, you thought wrong.
He whispers out an utterance of your name that hurts like fingers wrapped around your throat - clenching and squeezing until you go hot in the head.
“I keep saying it doesn’t matter because it doesn’t, Luke. You were right, we wouldn’t have been able to keep this up past the summer, anyway.”
Luke’s brows furrow your way, eyes darting between yours as his lips part to speak, but nothing comes out.
“You’re going back to Jersey soon, I’m going back to school, it was fun while it lasted but things have run their course.”
“You don’t believe that.”
“We both do.” You shrug, wearing your feigned indifference like armour, just like you know so well to do. “You don’t say the things you said on a whim, Luke, some part of you has to believe that they’re true.”
“I don’t-,”
“I’m giving you a chance to cut things off with no hard feelings-,”
“No hard feelings?” His disbelief cuts through you a little, the hurt in his eyes and the scrunch of his features, too, but if you give in, now, you’re setting yourself up for a world of hurt. 
You had barely just built up the courage to give your heart to him, in whatever shape he had scrunched and squeezed it into before, and he had already managed to bruise it. Giving in will only result in it breaking. 
“I have feelings. I have feelings for you. And I know you have feelings for me, too, you can’t pretend you don’t-,”
“It doesn’t-,”
“It matters.” You don’t think you’ve ever heard him sound like this - so sure, so serious, so raw - and when he takes a hold of your face, hands cupping your jaw, tender but firm, and forces you to look at him, you see the same in his features. “Cole is into you. And he said he was gonna ask you out, and I panicked trying to convince him not to. I should have had faith that you would have turned him down. And I should have been honest, and I should have told him that I’m into you. More than into you, I think I-,”
“I wouldn’t have turned him down.”
You lie with such ease that it makes your heart ache more than the truth, but it’s the only thing you can do to protect it.
If you let Luke carry on, you’ll let him back in.
You can’t let him back in.
Not with the tears that now well his eyes, or the way his face drops like you’ve just struck him in the gut - pained and powerless.
“What?”
Your hands shake in your lap so much you have to clench them shut, knuckles turning white as Luke’s touch slips from your skin. 
“If he asked me out, I would have said yes.”
Luke runs a hand through his hair, blinking repeatedly before he tears his gaze away from yours, and you feel like you can see his walls building - a sight that should flood you with relief, but doesn’t.
“So, what, everything we’ve been through together, all the things we’ve done, all the things we’ve said, you’re just gonna throw it all away like none of it matters?”
You can hear the hurt - can feel it even, clawing at your skin as if it’s trying to find a way to dig past the barriers you’ve put in place. 
But you have to do this.
“I guess not.”
Luke was always going to hurt you. Was going to burrow himself through whatever cracks you left bare to him, weasel his way into your heart and tear it from the inside out. And maybe you were always going to do the same to him.
“Alright then,” he mutters, robotic and distant, with his eyes stuck on the floor. 
He stands from where he had been crouched beside you, backing away before turning completely, and he walks away in long strides, the door to your bedroom closing with a soft click behind him. 
The tear that falls when he’s gone does so slowly. You feel it trail all the way down your cheek from the corner of your eye, until it drops, almost audibly, from your jaw and onto your lap. 
And then the rest follow, uncontrollable and unrelenting.
Inevitable, just like he had said.
A/N: so...... please don't hate me I wrote the ending first lmao!! I imagine this will cause riots in the streets tbh but please let me know what you think hahahah this whole story has become my baby!! she's problematic but she's mine!!!!
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spxfav · 1 month ago
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Summary: Post Tobias Hankel Spencer, struggling to stop taking dilaudid and spiralling in darkness finds light in the one he loves most <3
Warnings: Anxiety, drug dependency, panic attacks, depression (I think that's it, please let me know if I missed any)
Word count: 3.2k
a/n: Hi guys! This is my first time writing something longer than a bot for Spencer, so I really really hope you'll like it! The way I chose to portray his depression and anxiety here is very much based on how I experienced it, so this is very important to me. Let me know if you'd like a part two! Enjoy!
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Spencer was wasting away, fading. His dark eyes no longer shone like they used to. His pretty smile was now a rare sight to see. His nerdy contributions to conversations were now scarce - that is, if he ever interacted with anyone anymore.
He felt hollow, no longer being motivated to do anything but the one thing he knew he shouldn't. Dilaudid.
That little bottle now went everywhere with him. The flask and the demons that haunted him after Tobias, clinging to him and punishing him for whatever bad thing he had done to deserve this. And he was sure he had done something. He just couldn't understand why so many bad things kept happening to him, following him from his childhood to his adult years. Even with all the science in the world, the only explanation plausible enough was that he had done something terrible in his past life and was now paying for it.
Despite the leave Hotch let him take having ended two days ago, he still hadn't shown up to work. This was new to him. He'd always loved going to the bureau, even if it was just for paperwork. Now, he could barely read three lines out of his favourite book.
Time was blurry, a haze of sobering up and searching the high once again with pauses destined for the bathroom and occasionally to eat - when his stomach hurt enough to remind him he had to. Apart from that, he never left his bed, hopelessly wishing he could sleep without being hunted by the flashbacks of his time in that shed, of the splinters he wasn't able to remove after digging his own grave. His hands were now raw in the parts he had scrubbed out the skin to take the little wooden pieces off of him. He barely felt it. He barely even felt anything.
He knew it wasn't rational, but the empathy and guilt he felt for the man who kidnapped him was so intense it did nothing but contribute to his numb state.
So, alone, he spent his days, going through flask after flask of the forbidden liquid, cursing himself for not being strong enough to stop and wishing Tobias had never reanimated him back at the cemetery.
Naturally, after dealing with a schizophrenic mother all alone as a child, and being forced to grow up faster than he should have, he fiercely believed he had to solve this problem alone, like he's always done.
You, however, didn't. With the many gift baskets sent by Penelope and the sweet voice that was enough to make his demons dissipate - at least while you talked -, the time you spent sitting by his locked door always left him feeling somewhat relieved.
Sitting on the cold hardwood floor with sweaty damp hair clinging to his forehead, Spencer listened quietly as you talked, not giving you any hint that he was there. Part of him didn't believe he deserved those acts of kindness from you, so he hid himself in the shadows, and, as if forbidden, served as audience to your stories about events he missed. He noticed, even in his usually drugged state, that you tried your best to lighten up the stories, probably afraid to trigger something in him. If only you knew there was no need for a trigger.
x
It was a Wednesday, and the pouring rain that came through the window he forgot to close and got him and his bed soaked was almost enough to make him give up on the day, even if he had been up for only two minutes and 28 seconds.
But he couldn't. Because giving up would mean he'd have to sit in the wet sheets all day, and despite everything, he still had issues with the feeling of wet things against his skin.
Dragging himself out of bed, he gave up on the challenge of changing the sheets and settled for his sofa instead.
"I'm changing ambiens. This is improving."
The lie of getting better was more of a sentence he said as a form to attract it, though he never made the effort to stop himself from deteriorating further. That was merely an excuse for the voice in the back of his mind to scold him further. It started with his incapability of getting clean. Then, his lack of shower. After, came the barely eating and now, the sulking in bed - or in this case, the sofa.
His mood was as gray and dull as the weather, and the sound of the rain falling did little to comfort him through the many nightmares plagued naps that he eventually gave up on. This was the moment of the day he went to his bedside table and retrieved the little ornate box with the needles and the bottles of the clear liquid. This was the moment of peace, of relief.
His mind was hazy, clouded by the momentary pleasure only the dilaudid was able to provide when the familiar knock on the door came.
“Hi Spence.” You said, your honey, homey voice wafting through the apartment and reaching his ears.
Automatically, he stumbled across the living room, and, in an all but gracious way, dropped by the door. That was the first time you heard him move inside as you talked to him, and as minimal as it was, it brought a smile to your face.
“I think I heard you fall. Knock twice if you’re hurt.”
No knocks. So, he was okay. Or as much as possible.
“The day was boring. No new cases today.” You start talking, the daily briefing session that grew more and more important to his weary mind filling the previously silent apartment, your voice sounding like a melody to his stoned brain.
“But I thought of you.” His ears perked up, his spine straightening as he focused intently on the next words.
“Can you believe there was no sugar for the coffee? Not in the coffee station, not anywhere in the building.” It was silly. Stupid. But it made you think of him, and if he was on your mind, he was happy.
“That’s absurd.” He murmurs, a little out of it.
You freeze, too surprised that he said something this time. It was the first time you heard him speak in almost two weeks. It was muffled, and too low for you to understand, but it was words, and that was better than nothing.
“It is.” You say, trying not to draw much attention to the fact that he spoke. You didn’t want to scare him away.
“What happened next?” He asked quietly, almost as if talking to you was a mistake. To him, it was actually a privilege he didn’t deem himself worthy of.
“Garcia went down to a local coffee shop with Emily and they stole a bunch of packets for us. They came back running as if they had stolen a bank.” You say and chuckle, hearing the faintest of laughs inside from him. He was laughing. That was good. Amazing, actually.
“Good. Can’t imagine being without sugar.” He murmurs, and you couldn’t see the small smile on his lips at the first sign of normalcy after so long in the dark.
“Don’t worry. I’m sure when you get back there’ll be as much sugar as you want.”
Silence.
You wait, and wait, and wait, but he doesn’t speak again.
“Spence?” You ask, and the only other sound you hear that day is him getting up and stumbling away.
x
“When you get back.”
Those words plagued him for the rest of the day, which he spent locked up in his room to try and muffle your voice as you continued talking on the other side of his front door. Just the thought of it terrified him.
At first, he imagined it was out of fear of living something like his experience with Hankel again. But when he passed by the mirror in the bathroom and saw how he looked, he understood the real reason.
Deep dark circles. Hollow cheeks. Lifeless eyes. Hair greasier than it had ever been in his whole life. Pajamas stained with food he couldn’t identify. Grown out beard. He had gotten used to the smell by now, but he was sure it would be strong to anyone else.
He was disgusting. Gross.
Useless. Undeserving. A junkie.
His breathing quickened, but it was like no air came. One shaky hand moved to his heart, feeling the fast and strong beats. It felt like drums in a rock song. Like the cart of a rollercoaster against the rails. Like horses running freely.
Except there was no freedom. He felt trapped, desperate. Hopeless.
And as he fell to the ground and tears pricked his eyes, he was sure he might die.
No one will understand. No one will try to understand.
Suddenly death didn’t seem so bad. But just like it happened so many times before in his life, it was an easy way out. And nothing was easy for him.
So, fifteen minutes later, the needle in his arm was the only thing capable of taming the panic attack that still coursed through his veins.
x
When he rolled around on his bed, sweating from the nightmare, the room was spinning. Or maybe it was just his brain.
Either way, the open box on the bedside table, the not discarded needle and the torniquet still on his arm were explanation enough for what had happened the night before. He exaggerated. Again.
The day after these episodes were always the worst. Sickness, dizziness. Loss of strength in his muscles. That was also when the thoughts got worse.
It was ironic, really, that he went through almost a whole flask in hopes of drowning the voices only to wake up with them stronger than ever. It was a cycle. But then again, wasn’t all of this?
The world was a blur, a mix of living nightmares and not very healthy thoughts, and in the end, he caught himself wishing you’d show up.
Laughing, whispers of love and beautiful promises. That was how the world was around you. And even through the thick wood of his front door, he was still selfish enough to crave a glimpse of the Heaven you held in your hands; of the salvation from this twisted reality he found himself trapped in.
Spencer wasn’t the most emotional of men. In fact, before you, all his research pointed to him lacking the brain connections that allowed one to feel anything remotely romantic. He was sure he was okay without love, and he was sure he would always be.
But then you came, and it was like buying his first glasses all over again: suddenly the world was clear, and so much more beautiful.
It was hard for him to describe what he felt. He could only think of one simple way to put it. It was all orange.
x
“Hi, Spence” The melody of the notes that compose your voice echoed around the apartment, making the faintest of smiles bloom in his face.
For the past three days, you had managed to make him talk more and more. At first, it was weird. Alone in his apartment, the only things his walls had heard in the past few weeks were his terrorized nightly screams and the incoherent mumbles that occasionally made themselves present.
“Listen, I brought you something” You say and wait to see if he had any contributions. When he remains quiet, you continue. “I called your mom’s facility” His eyes shot open, and he sat up straighter on the floor. “Don’t worry, I didn’t say anything. I figured if someone was to tell, it should be you” The simple reassurance was enough to calm him down the slightest. “I called to ask her for the recipe of those peppermint cookies you told me about a few months ago.”
The smell of baked sugar filled the small kitchen. Days like these were good. Days when his mom was okay. When she was his mom again, and he had the freedom to be the child his seven-year-old self deserved to be.
“I made some” Your voice cuts through the first good memory h’s had since everything went down. “I’m sure they’re not as good as hers, but they’re not bad either. I have them here, I could drop them off with the baskets Penelope brought and yo-“
The sudden movement of the door opening catches you by surprise as you stumble back, no longer having a surface to rest your back on.
He opened the door. He really opened the door.
Spencer stood there, looking down at you and seeming even more surprised than you did. His eyes flickered over your form, heart beating faster. God, how he missed the sight of this angel.
He looked different from what you remembered. Dark stubble covering his face, messy and greasy hair, sleeves rolled up to reveal an arrangement of needle punctures. For a moment, neither of you say a word, simply taking in the sight of the one person you each missed more than breathing. That was when Spencer realised it. He’d rather die in that shed a thousand times more than go another day without seeing your face. The pictures he had really did you no justice, not when you looked more beautiful than a diamond, with its carbon atoms so perfectly aligned, creating what is believed to be one of the most precious objects on Earth. You didn’t even compare to that.
“You made me cookies?” He asks, looking down at the little box in your hands, the faint smell of the cookies reaching his nose.
“Yes. Yes, I did. They’re still a bit warm, I baked them before coming here.” You stand up, quickly enough to drop your blood pressure slightly, but not enough to startle him.
When he takes the box from your hands and, without another word, walks inside leaving the door open for you. There’s no hesitation in your steps as you follow him in. And the sight that welcomes you is nothing but heartbreaking. His once so perfectly organized place – at least according to the system only he understood – was now a mess. There were books on the floor, take-out boxes on every table, dirty clothes on the floor.
He wafted through the chaos, eyes never leaving the box as he opened it and threw himself on the sofa. Carefully, he picks up a cookie, and after an experimental bite, a single tear rolls down his face. Then another, and another, and another until the dam breaks and he is full on sobbing on the sofa, crushing the cookie as his hands close into fists and his shoulders shake.
Your heart, shattered already, breaks even further, and when you sit next to him, you feel shocked as he falls into your arms. His arms are tucked between your bodies, his face buried on your chest, and you don’t have the heart to tell him he smells the tiniest bit. No, not now. You could tell him he needed a shower when he didn’t look like a vulnerable child, climbing on your lap.
“It’s okay… shh…” His brain barely registers your comforting words, too busy paying attention to the way your fingers card through his hair without a hint of disgust. He knew he loved the right person, especially because of moments like this. You were just… perfect. It was cliché, but Spencer genuinely could not think of any other way of describing you.
“I’m sorry… I’m sorry…” His voice was almost inaudible, filled with a gut-wrenching guilt for doing this to you. “I’m s-sorry”
“Don’t be. It’s okay, you’re okay. I’m here” Your voice, the soft murmur of reassurance breaks him even further, relieving him of the pressure of the guilt he had been feeling for so long.
That day, he cried until he fell asleep in your arms. Not for a second did you let go of him, your hands always gentle and loving as you caressed his hair. For the first time in two weeks and four days, he slept with no nightmares.
x
The sound of steps moving around his apartment was the first thing he registered when he woke up. Rubbing his eyes and sitting up on the couch, he looked around, groggy and with his head pounding from crying.
You had your back turned to him as you cleaned his kitchen, the smell of something in the oven making his stomach growl slightly. Then he notices it. No clothes on the floor. No takeout boxes around. Books neatly on the shelves. You had cleaned his place while he slept.
For a minute, he simply watches you, dark eyes following your movements around the kitchen as you wash and dry dishes. Then you turn, and the small, concerned smile that forms on your lips as you walk closer is enough to send his heart racing in his chest again.
“You’re up. How did you sleep?” You ask, stopping behind the couch as your fingers lovingly brush his messy hair out of his face.
“Fine. How long was I out?” He asks and clears his throat, voice slightly gruff.
“About three hours. I didn’t want to wake you, so I cleaned up. And made dinner. You still like lasagna, right?”
His eyes stare directly at your face, and for a moment, he considers a crazy theory.
Maybe he had died that day in the shed. He died, and the last couple of days were his time spent in some sort of imbo. But now he was in Heaven. That had to be it. As irrational as it was, how else could he explain the presence of an angel in front of him so suddenly? Besides, he always thought that if the Realm of God was a real place, if his paradise was real, you’d be there.
“Spencer?” He blinks, and the world still has a happy veil over it when his eyelids open and his irises meet your face again.
“Yes. Yes, I like lasagna.” He nods, eyes fixed on you.
Maybe life wasn’t so bad after all.
x
The door closed behind you, and the illusion left just as fast. The light that seemed to follow you was gone, his world buried in darkness and numbness again. Your presence made him feel so light as you talked his ears off today. He didn’t mind. Not when he smiled more in a couple of hours than in the last two weeks. Not when you two were sitting so close, cuddling on the couch. Not when your lasagna had tasted like the best dish he ever ate.
But now you were gone, and all that is left for him to do is climb back in bed. His sheets are clean now – you changed them – and the overused pajamas on his body feel sinful against the fabric. What was meant to be a good thing only served to send him spiraling again, and as most nights, this one ended with a small pinch and the sting of the liquid as he applied it on his forearms.
Who knows? Maybe the delusions would bring you back tonight.
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piratefishmama · 2 years ago
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Every year, for every random holiday, Eddie winds up with a present in his locker. He has no idea where these come from.
They're not random "this could be for ANYONE" gifts either. They're themed, so it's not like someone's just mistakenly put them into his locker.
Valentines day usually gets him a little bag of homemade chocolates shaped like dice and a random mini fig theme painted for the day, meaning he has a good few random minis painted in reds and pinks with funny heart motifs, he has a human archer painted like cupid!!
Easter gets him another basket full of homemade chocolatey goodies, one time he got a half a chocolate egg filled with a delightful creamy substance that hid more dice chocolates and reeces pieces within it, but packaged in a little homemade treasure chest nestled atop a little red cushion and Eddie maybe swooned a little that time.
His birthday always got him the good shit. A new monster manual one year, a fancy dice bag another, a cool chalice thing he'd definitely be using to drink Mt Dew out of that he later found out to be actual silver
Christmas, however, the presents didn't turn up at his locker. School was out! They turned up on his porch. Like some Santa Clause bullshit. He got paints, he got sketch books, and he got more homemade goodies like chocolates, brownies, alcohol infused homemade fudge, and cupcakes!
This goes on for years, Eddie is unable to find out who keeps doing it, who keeps leaving these presents for him, and when after surviving hell, he finally graduates without an answer he figures with a deep sadness that he'll probably never know. Until his brand new gaggle of trauma bonded friends drag him to a gods' honest sleepover at Steve’s house. Until he sneakily steals one of the tasty looking chocolates from Steve's fridge and promptly freezes as it melts on his tongue because he KNOWS that taste, he knows it by heart.
Until he corners Steve to find out where he got those chocolates only to find out from a surprisingly bright red Steve that he made them himself.
And oh. Oh.
Oh.
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allwaswell16 · 8 days ago
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F a v o r i t e F i c s O f 2 0 2 4
As an ardent reader of One Direction fan fiction, 2024 has been an amazing year for fics! I read so many incredible fics this year, so please check out all my recs for the year here! Below you will find fics that brought me to tears, made me laugh, comforted me, filled me with joy, or had me yelling in my living room. I share this list with you all not to say that these fics are better than others from this year, but to say thank you to these writers who have left a mark on me with their fics.
To all our fandom's writers, thank you for the gift of your stories! Sending much love to you in the new year!
🪩 Louis / Harry 🪩
with venom on your tongue by wildestdreams / @thelavendrhaze
(E, 91k, enemies to lovers) a boarding school AU where Harry and Louis are academic rivals until they realize they’re more similar than they thought.
don't be afraid to love (and love again) by localopa / @voulezloux
(T, 83k, trans Louis) the one where louis is trans and afraid, harry is cis and brave, and being 100% yourself is easier said than done.
When the Lights Go Out by thelarenttrap / @antidotetogo
(E, 79k, F1 au) In its near eighty years of existence, Formula 1 has never had an out gay driver. In 2017, Harry Styles signs a contract with Scuderia AlphaTauri alongside his childhood friend and competitor, Louis Tomlinson. The next decade of their careers is some of the most tumultuous press--on and off the track--Formula 1 has ever seen.
I'm Praying (that you don't burn out or fade away) by @lululawrence
(NR, 74k, soulmates) Harry and Louis are literal stars who have known they were soulmates from their creation eons ago, however when Louis came to Earth to start the next phase of their fated future, he forgot everything. Even Harry.
A Frail Farewell by Rearviewdreamer / @all-these-larrythings
(M, 44k, famous/not famous) Louis can’t believe his luck when he is offered one of the easiest jobs he has had as a long-term house-sitter for the wealthy. Most of all he likes that there are no surprises until he gets the shock of his life from ex-pop star Harry Styles who isn’t supposed to be home.
The Things We Know To Be Wild by harryanthus_annuus / @harryanthus-annuus
(M, 39k, dragons) Louis is a London zoologist sent by the University of Highlands and Islands to assess the safety of the island of Eroda as part of the Wonder Seekers Project for sustainable tourism.
hard times in elmsmere by stylinsoncity / @aliensingucci
(M, 37k, time travel) for louis, being a full-fledged vampire complicates everything, not just his relationship with harry but with harry’s entire coven who took Louis in as an orphan.
Enough To Wish For More by galactic_larry / @galacticlarry
(M, 33k, The Bridges of Madison County au) Louis Tomlinson just wants a few days of peace and quiet while his family are out of state. But when he meets the lead singer of a band he’s never heard of, his life and everything he thought he knew about it changes forever.
Your Reign is Free (to give along to Santa) by LadyLondonderry / @londonfoginacup
(T, 28k, humor) It’s Christmas Eve. It’s a totally normal Christmas Eve. Harry and Louis have some friends coming by, and some totally normal birthday and Christmas plans. It’s a totally typical totally normal Christmas Eve. A fic that takes place over 24 (+1) hours where surely everything will go totally to plan.
and so I have to say (before I go) by we_are_the_same / @so-why-let-your-voice-be-tamed
(M, 27k, mystery) Sometimes falling in love is taking a leap of faith, jumping into the unknown with your eyes closed, hoping someone will be there to catch you. Sometimes falling in love is seeing the person in front of you, all their flaws and imperfections, and taking that leap nonetheless.
Rewriting the Melody by LadyAJ_13 / @ladyaj-13
(T, 26k, canon divergence) Louis doesn’t get put in One Direction. This time, the path to true love takes the long way round, including singing in toilet cubicles, fruit baskets, and long distance band counselling from someone who really doesn’t know what he’s doing, he just wants to keep talking to Harry.
Sugar, Sugar by @parmahamlarrie
(E, 25k, sugar daddy Louis) Meeting your soulmate was the most joyous event of one’s life… or at least, it’s supposed to be. Harry, in all of his 25 year old wisdom, was suspicious of the role fate plays in everyone's lives. He'd rather focus his time dating older men he meets off of a sugar baby website.
Room For One More Troubled Soul by patdkitten / @babyarcanacasey
(M, 25k, supernatural elements) Louis Tomlinson is the chief medical examiner of the Centre for the Law Enforcement of Supernatural Beings - more commonly referred to as simply "The Centre".
On a starlit night by @lunarheslwt
(M, 24k, omegaverse) omega and future Luna Louis is holding a mating ceremony to find his mate, but what he doesn’t expect to see amongst the alphas vying for his hand, is a familiar, yet unexpected face: Harry Styles.
Colorful Hearts by Larrysmomfics / @larrysmomfics
(M, 20k, humor) In a world where orgasmic emissions change color depending on the person’s mood, Louis Tomlinson’s semen has only ever been blue. At the recommendation of his doctor he attends a support group for people with similar conditions. 
 Behind Smoke Stained Curtains by @jaerie
(E, 19k, omegaverse) The worlds align when Louis meets an alpha from the road with as many secrets as he holds himself.
Stand on Holy Ground (series) by @wishingforloushair
(E, 17k, religion kink) Louis comes back to confess again, and Harry has an idea of how Louis can show God his devotion. 
Peeping by jacaranda_bloom / @jacaranda-bloom
(E, 16k, roommates) Louis has a thing for his housemate, Harry is under the impression that clothing around the house is an optional extra, and neither of them seem to be able to stop wanking long enough to get their shit together and admit their true feelings.
Lost But Won by @2tiedships2
(NR, 16k, omegaverse) When Harry loses his passport after a weekend trip to see Niall, the inconvenience of being stranded in America becomes a little more bearable after meeting Louis. Or a lot more bearable.
At your service, for your usage (series) by @holdingontochaos
(E, 16k, sex work) Louis is a doctor who works so much that he has barely any time to himself for pleasure, let alone to clean his house so he hires Harry as his naked maid and kills two birds with one stone.
so pull me closer, why don’t you pull me close? by @alwaysxlarrie
(M, 9k, uni) If the captain of the soccer team wants to substitute players and be Harry's partner instead... well, Harry's lemons just turned into lemon meringue pie. Who is he to argue with fate?
 and then, i wait there for you by punk_pillow_princess / @punkpillowprincess
(M, 9k, established relationship) Harry has always dreamed of having his “happily ever after”, but hasn’t found the right one yet. Suddenly, he meets Louis.
never just the tip by journeytothepast / @suckerforhome
(E, 6k, omegaverse) Harry believes alphas can't control themselves. Louis proves him wrong.
Just Two Stars Passing By by QuickedWeen / @becomeawendybird
(E, 5k, omegaverse) Harry blew up on TikTok and became a fashion commentator during the pandemic. Somehow he ends up covering arrival fashion for the 2024 Euros, and somehow Louis Tomlinson already knows his name.
Good-Old Fashioned Lover Boy by not_fitzwilliam / @not-fitzwilliam-darcy
(NR, 5k, omegaverse) When a miscalculated decision leads to an accidental courtship with the sweetest, most gentle alpha, Harry is torn between breaking the alpha's heart and telling the truth. 
Pretty and Preposterous by @brightlyharry
(NR, 5k, neighbors) Harry donates a copy of Pride and Prejudice to his little free library. He never expects what comes next.
 Pussy Juice by @homosociallyyours
(M, 4k, girl direction) While she manages to dodge the bar’s “special” drink, the Pussy Juice shot, she can’t avoid the feelings that come up when her former teacher (and teen crush), Louis joins her and her friends for the night.
 That’s the way love goes by bella28
(T, 4k, soulmate goose!) In a world, where soulmate geese are sent to the people who can’t figure out who their soulmate is, Harry finds himself stuck with a goose when he is attending a concert of his favourite artist Louis Tomlinson.
Come On and Rescue Me by @kingsofeverything
(E, 3k, silver fox Louis) Louis only intends to watch his hot neighbor’s Instagram live, but he winds up with his hand down his pants.
Figure This Out by @haztobegood
(E, 2k, age difference) Louis is everything Harry could have imagined when he’d typed “silver fox enthusiast” into his Grindr profile. Too bad he's probably scared Louis off by giving him too many expensive gifts.
coming home by @seekforwarmth
(E, 2k, canon) It’s coming home, one way or another.
What’s in a Name by @hellolovers13
(T, 2k, soulmates au) Louis had always known Harry was his soulmate. The name on his arm disagreed. But what did his soulmark know about true love anyway.
 You are so gorgeous (it makes me so mad) by @dreaminrainbows
(M, 2k, pining) Louis is a hot bartender and Harry is pathetically in love with him
The Unselected Journals of Louis W. Tomlinson - Vol 1 by YesIsAWorld / @louandhazaf
(E, 1k, epistolary) The Wandering of Things was not new, nearly two years into living here. However, the, uh, nature of this particular thing was quite different.
skinny dip (in water under the bridge) by hazzahtomlinson / @itsnotreal
(G, 880 words, exes) It’s a Wednesday and nostalgia might just get the best of Louis.
can't hide from yourself by yeah_alright / @uhoh-but-yeah-alright
(M, 666 words, suspense) Harry's home alone, faced with his reflection. And something's not quite right.
🪩 Rare Pairs 🪩
Like A Force Of Nature by @reminiscingintherain
(T, 30k, Zayn/Liam) the Heartstopper AU no one asked for.
To start again by @loretheloner
(E, 27k, Louis/Michael Blackwell) Louis finds himself slowly falling for a bandmate again, despite Oli's warnings against it. Michael finds himself slowly falling for his boss and fighting against the ghost of Louis' past relationship. 
It’s a Craving Not a Crush by LetTheMusicMoveYou / @letthemusicmoveyou28
(E, 9k, Liam/Louis) the one where Liam and Louis are best bros who end up getting married so that Liam has the insurance he needs to go to rehab. Now that he’s sober, they can get divorced. But do they want to?
Can You Feel Where the Wind Is by @fallinglikethis
(M, 3k, Zayn/Liam) He remembers arguing that he had no real power over anything, so no one would care about him, let alone try to hurt him. But that assessment had proven to be untrue today.
I regret you all the time by @disgruntledkittenface
(E, 2k, Louis/Prince William) Louis’ friends don’t understand, and they wouldn’t even if he explained. But every time William texts, Louis drops everything to go see him.
Skin on My Skin by Layne Faire / @laynefaire
(E, 2k, Zayn/Liam) Let me touch you where you like it Let me do it for ya
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allurilove · 13 days ago
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What are the yanderes getting you?
“Also featuring Henry and Moira.”
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Yandere Boyfriend has seen the trend on tiktok where people make a ‘burr basket’ for their significant other. He’s obviously going to participate because he simply loves you, and he doesn’t want to be flamed on the internet incase you wanted to share how you didn’t get one to a bunch of people you didn’t know. He thought that a ‘burr basket’ was sort of ridiculous, that it fed into overconsumption, but he decided to put that aside and get you one because it’ll make you happy. He’s been secretly shopping here and there, watching you browse the aisles and stores. You had the tendency to call something ‘cute’ or you made a comment that you needed that item— yet you would always put it back on the shelf and walk away. Your boyfriend would scratch his head in confusion and quickly grab that thing and toss it into the basket he carried. If you weren’t going to buy it, he will.
Calm Yandere has always been the type of person to think of a theme before he buys you something. For your birthday, he knew that you ran out of your favorite perfume, so he buys you another, and a bunch of flowers and aromatic things. For this year, he knew he wanted to get you an array of cozy items. A thick white sweater, mufflers with a snowflake design, fuzzy socks to go with the pair of uggs, a candle that smells like apple and wood, and a bunch of tea he got from a specialty store. He puts all of his items in a red box with a gingerbread design, and puts a bow on top. He’s quite happy with what he got you, and he contemplated multiple times if he should just tell you. However, every time he reached for his phone, his dog would put her paw on his hand. Silently telling him not to.
Yandere Husband loves to travel with his family, but since his sisters were visiting him instead, he decided to stay at home and surprise you with something else. Tickets, booking hotels and flights was his sort of expertise, and buying gifts for others… was a bit of an hassle since you had closed yourself off to him. He couldn’t tell what you liked anymore, so he was really working off of whatever intel Henry gave him. But, he had an inkling that Henry was mostly dropping hints of what he wanted. Because your husband was pretty sure you couldn’t care less about receiving monster trucks, and “sick new shoes, and it has to be from adidas. Dad, are you even listening? Should I just draw you the exact pair I want— I mean what mom wants?”
Your man knew that you wanted a lamp. You had mentioned before that you wanted to add some light to the bedroom, and instead of giving you a regular shmegular lamp, he got you the Alabaster Totem 16 that costed about 30k. He just thought it was cute and unique. And of course, he just haaaad to get you some jewelry too. He personally liked Mikimoto and got you the ‘Classic Black Sea Pearl and Diamond Pendant.’ He also got you another necklace from Graff, a ‘Pear Shape Diamond Cross-over Necklace.’
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This is the type of food Moira and Henry would make for reader— with the help of yandere husband of course lol. They might not be too concerned if the food tastes good or not, and as long as it was pretty, they’ll feed it to their mother. While yandere husband is busy making the food, the kids will make their iconic homemade cards they give you every year. Henry is a drawer, always scribbling some comic inside his card instead of words, and Moira liked to practice her cursive skills.
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For Yandere Chaebol, Christmas is a pretty big deal to him and his family. He has a truckload of presents for his family, and another truck for his kids. His cousins are located in Busan, and his whole mother’s side preferred the simpler life of Jeju island. So, he’s dragging you around to visit all of his family. He’s not ashamed to show you off to his family anymore, and the press had learned of your guys’ relationship. A lot of people had so much shit to say, and the k-netizens don’t technically like you. The Chaebol cares about practicality… and comfortability, so he bought you a pair of shoes. You two will be walking around a lot, seeing nice sights, and eat good food. He might not be getting you much, but he’s paying for pretty much everything. The hotels, restaurants, the transportation, and the dumb souvenirs you want.
Yandere Prince isnt about to get you a necklace or earrings, but definitely a human feast. He’s been keeping a list of all the people he hates, and had beef with, for the past year. For thirty days straight, he’s been hunting them down and kidnapping them. He kept them plump for his wife- shoving clean foods down their throat. When Christmas time came along, he pretended he didn’t get you anything. He just sat there at the head of the table, and made brief glances at you. You were a tinge disappointed, your stomach growling, but you never had a taste for human food. You were starting to expect that you were going to have to sit there and watch your family chow down, but then… Your husband got up from his seat, clapped his hands, and a light had appeared at the newly built stage. His enemies were then lined up one by one, each in chains and shackles. The yandere prince might not show love for you, but he does think you’re beautiful. The way you tear into his enemies and make them scream… he’s glad to have you.
Dumb Yandere’s making sure that the house is clean, the bedsheets were washed and dried, and that the dining room is decorated to the nines! The yandere bought a tiny tree with red and white ornaments, a mistletoe taped to the front door (so he can immediately have an excuse to kiss you), and he was your present. The man awkwardly adjusted the wrapping paper he put around his cock, and he waddled around the house as he prepared the dinner table. He had ordered food before you came, and he made the dessert himself. He picked off the burnt bits on the pie, and tried to cover up the misshapen brownies with powdered sugar.
Crybaby Yandere Inmate could only cry from behind bars. He cried, humped his pillows, cried again, and then decided to make you a card. With his crayons he drew a portrait of you and him standing by a tree on the front of the card, and on the inside, he started to write how much he missed you. He rubbed the strawberry jam he got from breakfast on his lips, and he pressed long and hard onto the paper. “mmmmwah,” he then smiled as he pulled away and saw the kiss mark on the paper. All he could hope for is that you hadn’t fallen for another man.
Allure: Still writing yandere husband x you part four. So far it’s about 1.6k words rn.
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