#personalized new year gifts
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flirty… why are you as a man looking at another man like that?
#…he’s gonna Take It outside#sidney crosby#pittsburgh penguins#hockey#winter classic#a gift to me personally#happy new year
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☽ ✧ once a greedy king / slain / now cursed to shamble with his shame / a sword covered in rust and flowers ✧ ☾
| Commission Info
#flightrising art#FR#pearlcatcher#dragon#sketch#digital art#personal#*twirls hair* soooo there's this new dragon in my lair#a sweet Christmas gift from a friend <3#i have SO much lore and concept art in my head for him ugghhh i wish I wasn't shackled to an office desk >:(#he's cursed to stay in the underworld and can only resurface on Christmas eve for one night a year#he'll drag you back down to hell with him#unless u can distract him with mulled wine & riddles or stories
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I am not a fish: Introduction
"Looking at their work I would be expecting 8s or 9s"
My biology teacher said that when I was in year nine. It was not the first time someone had said something to that effect, and it was not the last.
The fact of the matter is that I spent most of my time, up until year 11, being told how far I would go, how high my grades were expected to be and how I could do anything that I wanted. People have said that, I just about nudged into the gifted category(though that is a nuanced discussion for another time), not like some of my friends who passed everything with their eyes closed, I definitely had to work, but I was honestly doing well.
My first set of mock GCSEs in year eleven came back and I was broken. Not one of my grades was above a six. This continued through year 11, I was not living up to the expectations that were set. This all came to a head on results day when I discovered that I had only just scraped a 6 which was not enough to do maths A-level, and without maths, I couldn't do physics. This was an issue. I want to be an astrophysicist, however, I have always been in a complex "situationship" with maths, and honestly, I think we might need couple's counselling, but I'm stretching this metaphor too far so suffice to say, I was not too proud of my performance.
So here I am, the day before my first day of college and getting set to do Biology, Environmental science, and Geology. And I will be the first to admit, I am still bitter, I am still upset, I am not over it, but if I could do all the subjects I wanted too, they would be next on my list after physics and maths. The idea is that I will retake my maths GCSE and then go back after college to do physics and maths, so really, in essence I am just taking the scenic route, and maybe, I will end up somewhere wonderful that I could never have dreamed of.
take it easy and good luck to everyone starting this new year
written: 03/09/2024
posted: 03/09/2024
#you will be okay#it will work out#Gifted#taking the scenic route#education#learning#student#memoir#college#new year#start of term#uk#personal#life is strange#geology#environmental science#biology#gcses 2024#gcse student#gcse results#a level#grades#college student#didn't go to plan but it's ok
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hav ben working consistently w 1 of my sunny coworkers on non-sunny projects for a couple months now nd today he told me he cn tell nd is rly glad tht even when im stressed it never gets as bad as it does when we’re on sunny cuz on sunny i usually look like im dying
it was sweet of him to say but like...he doesnt understand the state i enter when i walk onto that set. literally nothing will ever effect me like that place does.
#ramblings#when i talk abt how i dissociate on set im like not exaggerating @ all i literally become a new person to get thru that show#and i guess that new person looks like hes dying all the time LOL news to me actually#i thought i looked chill zlfklhnfmjgdhj im super chill on these other projects i can be normal srsly#the coworker who im working w / who said all this is coincidentally the one who was sending the macdennis fanart n th groupchat#and he might not come back to sunny this year NOOOO hes my favorite guy :((((#he just gave me the jacket they got as a wrap gift frm s14 today 🥺😭#HWHDIFHFI AS I WAS WRITING THIS HE JUST AIRDROPPED ME A VERY SCARY PICTURE#changed my mind i hate him good riddance
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Six Years
Six years later
The sunrise glows through my glass painted windows
Six years later
I drive in my car with my windows
down as the wind is kissing my cheeks
Six years later
I’m singing the songs that reminds me
of my heart breaks
Six years later
I’m writing poetry about the ones who
left their imprints on my heart
Six year later
I’m alive
and sharing nothing but
love
with the world-
even though the darkness
was my
closest
friend
#spilled thoughts#personal#spilled ink#mine#spilled words#poetry#love#heroin addiction#words#addiction recovery#years#living life#spilled poetry#poems and quotes#personal vent#spilled poem#poems and poetry#slam poetry#original poem#writers problems#write every day#i write too much#romance#first love#spilled poety#spilled#spilled writing#new poets society#the gift of writing#writerslife
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A gift for @tohruies !!
"The perfect winter day."
Word count: 400
Not proofread ! (Also, I haven't gotten alhaitham's character down fully. Bear with me 🤧)
The air was chilly as snow fell in soft clumps, collecting in the pairs' hair as they walked down the streets covered in a thin layer of white.
Alhaitham carried a few bags in one hand, different designer brands from the mall. He'd only have the best for the one he loved most. In his other hand was coco's, tucked into his jacket pocket to keep her hand warm while he tossed a short glance every once in a while to make sure she kept her other hand tucked in her own pocket.
The silence between them was comfortable, laid over the area like a warm blanket in the cold air. It wasn't long before alhaitham was pulling the door open for coco to step inside, following after her. As she took her shoes off, he gently placed his hand over her shoulder, making sure she won't fall before slipping his own off.
After putting away the new items they bought together, he made sure the heat was on before joining her in the kitchen, a nice warm drink already being poured into two mugs. He smiled softly, resting his hands on her hips as he pressed himself close, giving a soft kiss to the back of her head.
"I made you some hot chocolate." She turned her head to look up at him, a soft smile to match his pulling at her lips. "..thank you."
The two made their way to the loveseat near the tv, alhaitham sitting down and pulling her onto his lap as he gently took the hot mug from her hand to set it beside his on the end table. "What was that movie you wanted to watch last week?" His voice was gentle beside her ear, hus breath warm against her skin.
"Oh!" Coco grinned and reached for the remote, leaning back against her lover as she set the movie up, yet his gaze did not stray from her lovely face. "Ready?" She turned her head to meet his gaze and held back a small laugh at the expression on his face. Absolutely lovesick.
She leaned in to press a quick kiss to his lips and directed him to watch the tv, starting the movie.
He couldn't help the way his eyes drifted back to coco every once in a while, admiring her beauty before he forced his gaze back to the screen.
#I NEED A TAG FOR GIFTS OMG#little delights for those she loves ♡#there! kinda long..#COCO! I didn't have time today but#I'll have your Xiangli Yao art done before Christmas!#(at most New Years I swear)#(it gets busy during winter time)#I hope you enjoy this little gift in the meantime!#I hope I got personalities down okay~#still trying to study you two 🤭#have a good night lovely#I might change this tag at some point 🤔#dunno how I feel about it yet
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Here's the first half (there's going to be four more) of the New Years gifts I made for my mutuals that have sonas/ocs that I could find👌, happy new year guys lmao
@onepokerhen
@cumonpumpkin
@nosleepgummitato
@groovygladiatorsheep
#originally I was going to colour and render all of them out more#but college just started so I stuck with lineart#happy new year#arthrobug#bugbrain#art#gift#illustration#oc#sona#mutuals#all of my artist mutuals are such good artists frfr my glob#if one of you isnt my mutual or i tagged the wrong person so sorry skfneof
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shove over mo ran, it's my turn to wait five years for chu wanning
#this is about the new rumors regarding dangai/danmei policies in china#at any rate#haoyixing#hyx#the husky and his white cat shizun#erha he ta de bai mao shizun#皓衣行#二哈和他的白猫师尊#2ha live action#erha live action#to be honest i don't think we're getting them at all#but i had to jump on the trend#hua cheng waited for 800 years we can do it too :_)#what happened to capitalism and making a profit no matter what genre or production lmfao#helpp i'm remembering the person who tweeted 'what if hyx goes on hiatus after chu wanning [redacted] so we get the five years of waiting#apollo and the gift of prophecy
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I opened Pinterest for the first time in months.
That made me realize a lot about how bad I was actually doing and how much of a Waffle House Index use of Pinterest is for adult me, apparently.
I hadn’t realized it had grown that foundational to me in a healthy-brain-exercise-and-hobby-joy way. Nice to know moving forward! It’s another sign I can keep track of and use to spot correlation/indicator patterns earlier my behavior.
I love this kind of thing, it makes me so excited!
#personal data hacking is my passion#someday I’ll tell a story about the most notable times I tracked things or hacked my own mental processes from childhood to now#including the fear of spiders and bed wetting and behavior changes and posture and heart rate and cursive and putting kitchen items and#trash away as soon as I’m finished using them instead of never ever or ages and ages later#I’m so proud of that#you have to give it time and still commit. chaining thoughts and routines and behaviors really works#we are not separate brains and bodies and external environments#anyway I’m gonna go haha I used up he last of my energy burst on Discord and here and I need to go rest and lie on the floor and probly doze#love you all be back soon bye mwah!#add to journal#trauma evolution#my Waffle House index#this is going to be a fun new tag I’m so going to have fun with this and I bet it’ll be a helpful example reference for other people too#more than just for future me!#so excited so proud of myself so happy so grateful for hope about me really trusting that my ability and my behavior and my performance#are able to and going to yes keep getting better#long many-milestone path-journeys of potential#like when I was a little 6-7 year old kid-team athlete looking ahead at a concept of a future with me over time getting#stronger and cleverer and faster and slicker and calmer and even happier and more and more capable and able to accomplish!#a gift. all this time I didn’t think I’d have and have been living anyway is such a gift.#knowing that I truly have future time to grow and explore and change and improve in even though I still can’t FEEL or IMAGINE that future#time yet. also a gift.#the time I will one day realize I can imagine a future and imagine myself alive? will be a gift.#breath is a gift. experiencing life is a gift. other life is a gift. rhythm is a gift. motion is a gift. awake is a gift. color is a gift.#such a great expanse. all of it new. all of it eternal. all of it me. all of it nothing I’ve ever known before. all of it all of it#all of it. gifts.#gonna go have floor time now. this would be such a nice time to re-re-regain my ability to cry!#mwah I love you future me. take care of your hand and thank u for writing all this down 💛#hey little star whatcha gonna queue?#my poetry
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unspoken dispute to settle
#beedoodles#my ocs#new guy#goopy#its not that new guy wants to obey the law or a liscence it just thinks you are incapable of killing anyone unless#you possess something she found on a sketchy ad hey ordered from YEARS ago. convinced the liscence is out there.#and feels as though the mailman is onto it and Will not deliver it intentionally to foil zer plans#side note new guy also thinks every mailman in the world is the same person and theyre just REALLY good at changing appearances#because xey move around from town to town constantly#they never see the same one#beef from the very beginning .#i imagine little baby guy asking santa for a functional aeroplane and thinking the mailman had intervened in a kindof imaginary scenario#that The Mailman (singular ever changing entity) was at war with Santa and holding gifts hostage#used to be a delivery elf but rebelled and started the world wide postal service in opposition to the Big Jolly Corporation#now dismantling capitalism is a wonderful thing but in a 5 to 8 year olds brain the main focus of the dispute was the bad guy was the one#who made it so Aeroplane present didnt happen#keep in mind this is all imaginary scenario in baby guys head#you know i could embelish on this imaginary scenrio too if i wanted to because you know i love concepts and ideas and my for that fucks goo#as story ideas#you know they DO. im king of the imaginary lanscape of Cartoons and Comics not yet past the fetal stage of rumination#fuck with me#FUCK with me entirely#clenches my fist. looks off into a beautiful sunset. stews about it
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i am freeeeeeeee [collapses into a pile of dust]
#the last hour went okay bc we were just playing a card game and doing gifts/cards phew#also i found out theyre celebrating my bday on... august 25th? hewwo?? they didn't tell me until now 😭😭#my sister will be back at uni in sept and my parents are leaving on a trip the first day of sept so i'll be alone again for it fsdjkl#which. mixed feelings about that. i won't have to be afraid of them interacting w me but also :'( a little sad to be home alone for it#for the third year in a row fsjdkl#OH WELL. i should just be grateful tbh fdsjkl#the one thing i'm very sad about though is i can't go upstairs anymore bc the new security system has motion detectors#last year i watched jerma on the TV up there and sat on the comfy chairs... it was so fun fdsjkl. can't do that this year though AUGH#alas!!! i will somehow make it fun anyways maybe i will just ask if i can use the oven so i can make myself a cake again this year#SORRY FOR PERSONAL POSTING SO MUCH TONIGHT BTW. its been rough this evening fsdjkl but im going to go draw now :3#dandy.cmd#vent //#ALSO CONGRATS TO ME FOR BEING RLY QUIET AND AGREEABLE AND NOT ADDING ANYTHING NEW TO CONVOS HURRAY#finally i have gone back to highschool me thank GOD i've gotten too comfortable having opinions around them since i graduated fdsjkl#being around people (in the workplace and going to a counselor) who treat you like a Real Human Person will do that! wow!#abuse cw
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the goodies i got yesterday!!! shoutout to paulina pecio!!! your berserk pieces are incredible!!!
#my bedroom in my new apartment has a red wall so the berserk pictures will look perfect there!!!!#charles will go above the doorframe like where people put up jesus sometimes#the laios sticker was the very last one.. the person selling it literally had it hidden away but sold it to me#since i was dressed up as laios...#wish i could have bought more key chains but they were $10 or more :'((#there was also a comic stall with old issues not printed anymore#and i got my hands on 7 issues that were $2 each!! thought i'd never find any ever#besides issue 1 i got like 15 years ago!! im really happy#and the red dragon origami is a gift from a falin i met at the con!!!!!! ❤❤❤❤❤
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It's my birthday today, and I'm now as old as kita shinsuke in the timeskip! 🥳
#wasn't sure if i wanted to celebrate here but KABU CAME HOME in my 4th multi pull and the world HAVE to know!!! ❤️🔥#legit shook my mom's shoulders in the middle of a jbbq spot because i didn't expect to pull him this early in a pokefair scout 😭💖#also! peek my hbslv photocards from 42yojin on the bird app 🤩💝 they came earlier this month and i gotta flex that here waughhhh 🥺🫶#anyway: here's to another year hoping that i can be somewhat healthy! i sure hope this month's medicine dosage works haha :')#and for whatever shitshow awaits me when i start school again in sept. nawt sure how i'm gonna wing it with my condition but 🤷♀️#that will be a problem i'll deal when i get there. thankfully i've been getting better at nawttt borrowing grief and anxiety from the futur#here's to hoping i can also live the ちゃんとやんえん way like kitasang does... i need have just half of his resilience to organize my life lmao 😭#but i'm grateful to have lived long enough to see the beauty in life 🥺🫶 met all kinds of amazing people and had tons of fun too!#also i went out today for ~3 hours 🥳🥂 my joints are sore as hell but i had fun + looked and felt pretty + bought a new jacket as my gift#most importantly KABU-SAN CAME HOME RRRRRAAAAHHHH ❤️🔥❤️🔥❤️🔥 燃えろおおおおおおお!!!!!#LAST WISH but here's to hoping my exhaustion + stress from may disappears soon 😭🤚 i miss writing and i think it's interfering my writing#i hope you all have a great day ahead!!! 🫂💖 and kabu + larry comes home soon if you pull for them!!! 🥺🍀#personal
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google: how does one tell people I don't celebrate without pretending to be jewish or a johovas witness?
#people assume i'm jewish and ask me my hanukkah plans#like people have spent their whole lifes watch hundreds of movies hey look we cure the grumpy anti-spirit of Christmas man#and i wasn't raised relgious so it doesn't bug me to not cuz I only ever did the secular-ish version anyways#Every year all my friend forget and try to fix me and tell me I just need to make new memories are tell me I'm evil or something#we are adults you should be able to respect that I'm happier this way even if you don't understand#i just never vibed with christmas#it feels like everyone is a sleeper agent even jewish friends#i do new years#and like april fools day#and halloween#it shouldn't be that big a deal#but like it really triggers people#and they assume the worst about my parents which is so untrue#this year might go no contact with the first person who threatens me in response to my car rules#no Christmas music no weeb music no feet on the dash#i am not anti-christmas you can have your fun and I give gifts to friends#i just don't have a tree#or do antything special#and i don't want to go to your parent#i could fly to my parents#i'm not that broke#i'm just happier have a free wednesday to myself#yes i have christmas traumatic events but i felt this way before then#no body would care or notice if I didn't do easter#i know becuase i don't do easter unless it lines up with a vacation and I can see my parents#advice#holidays#christmas#the answer is lying isn't it i don't want to lie#i don't celibrate a religous holiday this time of year shouldn't be that hard
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SANTA SANTA BOY YOU'RE THE WORST IT'S THE 25TH I WISH IT WAS THE 1ST COUPLES ALL AROUND ME DAMN IT HURTS WANNA PUSH 'EM IN THE FIREPLACE AND WATCH EM BURN SANTA SANTA WHY DO YOU HATE ME? I'M A GIFT LOOK AT HOW GOD MADE ME NEVER NEVER GET WHAT'S ON MY LIST FRUITCAKE JUST MAKES ME SICK.
#*carly chats#sabrina carpenter#is it new years yet?#THIS VERSE GAGGED ME#WANNA PUSH EM IN THE FIREPLACE AND WATCH EM BURN???#SANTA SANTA WHY DO YOU HATE ME???? I'M A GIFT LOOK AT HOW GOD MADE ME?????#HELLO??????#HER MIND??????????????#THIS SPECFIC VERSE IS GONNA BE MY WHOLE PERSONALITY THIS HOLIDAY SEASON I CAN ALREADY FEEL IT#HOLYYYYYY SHITTT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#fruitcake
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i need help to manage my budget... by help i mean 3 million euro sent directly from heaven i guess
#this is not even about The Economy and Housing Crisis this is like. my life and choices lately lol afjsahfjk let's see:#1. christmas gifts - i don't even know how much i spent on them because i had the flu and wasn't really thinking but let's say 1000 pln#2. trip for new years eve to the mountains - 2200 for hotel and then let's say 300-350 for food and stuff#3. bills like the internet and phone is 90; rent is 1100#4. trip to warsaw 100 hotel 180 food and drinks 200 ?#5. meet and greet with simple plan 800 .... i will never recover sfshdfsj but it was kinda worth it - won't do that again tho#6. groceries since i am back 120#7. and now i need to travel back home and it's like a cumulation because it was my dad's name day + my mom's birthday and their wedding#anniversary adsfhgsdjhsd so i need gifts again i mean i want to buy them something nice i already spent 180 pln but i will buy something#extra for each of them because i kinda want to because we see each other so rarely#8. public transport ticket for another month is 80#9. i will have to pay rent again soon and the internet and phone#10. i have a wedding coming and like 37 concerts#to sum up. i am Fucked <3 but writing it out helped a little ;_;#i will eat concrete and drywall by march <3#personal
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