#the coworker who im working w / who said all this is coincidentally the one who was sending the macdennis fanart n th groupchat

[chrliekclly]

hav ben working consistently w 1 of my sunny coworkers on non-sunny projects for a couple months now nd today he told me he cn tell nd is rly glad tht even when im stressed it never gets as bad as it does when we’re on sunny cuz on sunny i usually look like im dying

it was sweet of him to say but like...he doesnt understand the state i enter when i walk onto that set. literally nothing will ever effect me like that place does.

[thinkthinbitches]

I bought a scale the other day for the first time since I threw out my last one three years ago. I weigh 35 lbs lighter than I did at the doctor earlier this year. The joy I feel is insane. Everyone has said that they’re concerned, but there’s not even a difference. It’s just the way I dress. I’ve stopped caring about everyone and everything, so might as well.

I found a man. He makes me feel so happy. It hasn’t been long, but I can tell he’s good for me. I can’t say it’s the same vice versa… but I try my best for him. He’s so sweet and caring. I’ve been a literal nuisance to him and he says he doesn’t mind and rather likes it. We’re so different but so the same. I like to listen to his heart beat, because it makes me feel some way when I know I’m the one making it skip a beat. I can’t really talk about him to others. Everyone is so dismissive about it. There are a few happy for me, but others are hating. Someone tried to tell me I was love blind and an attention whore when I first met him. At the time he and I were only friends. Like I said, it hasn’t been long, so there’s no labels, we just spend time together when we have time. He works a lot and our schedules are opposite, but it’s so worth it. He makes me feel pretty and it’s been so long since I’ve felt that. I’m not dumb or naïve; I just like being around him. He has the cutest cats who have both slept in bed with me for the first time the other week. They’re loving, but they don’t even sleep in bed with him. I mean they try but he takes up most the bed so they can’t a lot of the time. When we met, I was immediately attracted to him. He worked at another store in the same company as I did at the time and he came to my store to help out since we were short handed. I was the only girl on the job at the time so I had to keep my thoughts to myself until my girl came in to work. As soon as she did, she said the same thing I said to myself. He’s hot. I remember at one point we had just gotten out of a rush and I went to step out for a smoke break and as soon as I did, more customers came. I started coming back and he stopped me and said he saw i was trying to go on a smoke break and that he could take my spot until I got back. So I went back outside and got on my phone and went straight to Snapchat. I had a private story for behind the scenes at my work and goofy stuff going on there, so I started recording myself talking ab how nice and hot and amazing this dude is. I go back inside and we start talking and towards the end of my shift (he was off at the same time) he asked me if I could give him a ride home after work (which is also a normal thing for the people who worked at my store so I normally gave rides home anyways). Of course I agreed and we went to his house, might I mention is coincidentally a literal minute walk from my home, and he invited me inside to smoke to thank me for the ride. Usually I don’t waltz into strangers homes, but I’m pretty good at reading people and their intentions, plus he’s a good longtime manager at the other store and some of my coworkers knew him and told me ab him. We chill for an hour or two. The first thing he tells me is that he noticed my lanyard with my keys on it and a bunch of keychains and said that when he saw them, that was the final push and he knew he had to talk to me. So we chatted ab each keychain and I let him “inspect” them. After a while I went home, I received his Snapchat and as soon as I got home I got a message from him saying how he really liked hanging out w me and wanted to hang out again soon. I was there the next day 😅 and probably the next day again. I brought my best friend to meet him and we all hung out for a night and we went home and discussed what she thought of him.

Its been like two weeks since I’ve written that last part. We’re still seeing each other. Still no labels, but still no problem w me though. He’s made comments that sound pretty exclusive to me and im not seeing anyone else so its all good right now. Plus im usually w him so I don’t think he’s talking to anyone else either 😅😅 my birthday just passed and he got me some really cute shirts of some shows we like to watch together. He said that was only half the gift and I still dont know what the other half is😩 I had some free movie tickets so on his day off we went to the movies. Both of us hadnt been to a theater in a while so it was a fun experience.

Im a little annoyed w him rn though. Not annoyed just liked a little frustrated. Bc I understand, but then again like I could’ve been contacted lol so basically he asked me to come over after he got off work and went to the gym and hung w his buddy. Which is normal so I agreed. I was texting him until like 2 hours after he said he wanted me earlier and them I stopped getting replies until like an hour ago bc he fell asleep. I haven’t slept at all bc I waited but then it was just time for me to do stuff instead of just wait. So im a little cranky rn, also on my period and that’s definitely not helping. Omfg I just remembered this one day but I think it’s a bit too nsfw💀 let’s not get into that.

Anyways, I really hope he doesn’t see me as temporary. Like short term flings are a no from me. Ig at this point it’s too late to turn back but still 🥲 every time his name pops up on my phone my heart literally skips and my stomach has caged butterflies. Im not as self conscious around him as I normally would be. I still am a little bit mostly bc I just wanna look my best for him a lot of the time. He still appreciates my sweatpants and hoodies, but I like to be a tease sometimes with my outfits. He’s a skinny boy and im kinda curvy so im like bigger ish but he’s taller so it like makes up the difference. And somehow i dont die of embarrassment standing next to him.

Anyways he’s just so pretty and nice and makes me feel good and I just wanted to rant ab him. Who knows, maybe if he likes me back then we can look back at this in the future 😌 positive thinking 🫶