#neutrodivergent

[aroaceconfessions]

I feel so weird seeing people talk about amatonormavity and how it made them feel broken cause my autistic ass didn't experience that at ALL so it's like God I'm so sorry

Submitted July 11, 2023

[amber-isnt-a-precious-stone]

This might be an odd question but can you use the spoons to describe things if you don't have chronic illness or a disability?

I personally think, why not! Everyone's energy fluctuates on different days and abled-bodied people get sick too (eg; with the flu, broken bones). It's a good analogy to describe how you're feeling and to make sense of how much energy you have to not burn out

So why not (⁠ ⁠ꈍ⁠ᴗ⁠ꈍ⁠)

[ringdabel]

This place is perfect for my Neutrodivergent ass

[h4zardousch3micals]

I literally haven't thought about my Inscryption oc's in like a year but my brother made a comment about them in my general direction and suddenly I'm neutrodivergent about them again

[cxppuccinxz]

I feel so bad for my brother sometimes

Like

He treats me like shit

But

It's sorta understandable

He's definitely neutrodivergent + mentally ill in some way (I suspect bpd but idk I'm not a psychiatrist) but bc I got diagnosed with autism first our parents are convinced that he's the """normal""" one and doesn't need any help

If he ever upsets me he has to apologize but if I ever upset him he has to suck it up (even if I WANT to apologize)

If he forgets to do something he gets yelled at but if I forget to do something he's made to do it for me (when all they had to do was REMIND me and I would've done it)

And he absolutely hates me bc of it

But like

I didn't ask for this. It's not helpful for me either :(

Idk

[jewishfreakshow]

I am begging you people to STOP saying you're dyslexic if you're not actually dyslexic because recently I was talking about my dyslexia to my friend and they said "wait you were serious?" And I nearly had a fucking stroke

[idea-wh0re]

Okay- I'm going to rate pacing music.

For people who definitely do not know the term I have coined it, you zone out to music and imagine scenarios with your favourite characters, or just imagine scenarios of any kind from any place, real or imaginary. It's an escape!

Often, neutrodivergent people will do this to distance themselves from reality because fuck reality man.

I do not know who else can do it aside form neutrodivergent people, but let's continue!

I'll be rating music on how well it does and how much you have to restart.

Personally, I tend to have a short time span and just want a quick little rush of dopamine sometimes. Sometimes I want to go for longer!

The songs can get boring so I have to find new ones, sadly, but that's ok

So, without further ado I present... The ratings!

Freaks, by Surf Curse is a good one around 20-25 seconds, with an exciting chorus, enough to imagine your scenarios for a few seconds, with 20 seconds before to set the scene in your head.

If you just want the chorus part, then you have to restart it over and over again by turning on your phone and restarting or use the bar on the home screen.

I'd say 8/10, honestly- good to zone out to as long as you restart it a lot.

In this Shirt by the Irrepressibles is one if you want to pace for a good few minutes, with a consistent beat throughout the song and it doesn't have a particular chorus of intensity.

It helps set the scene and act it out in your head properly, but more slowly. However, you may get bored of the same beat.

I'd say 7/10, it's a great song in all its value.

Okay, Venom by Eminem. It has a rather good beat at 1:16 l exactly, perfect for your scenario. However, some of us will not have the attention span to listen to it for an entire minute, including me, so I set it to 0:40 seconds before pacing. It's enough time to get some backstory before the final imagine comes.

If you listen to it for a whole minute, you'll really get some good backstory.

Generally, you do have to move it back to there, which requires opening the phone if you move it back there.

I'd say a 6/10, pretty good song but it's not that good for just one final imagine.

I may do more of these posts in the future.

[juliasbaker]

When I speak to myself and I don’t like how something sounded or like it so much that I want to hear again, I repeat what I said over and over and over again & it sounds like “yes it was really fun really it was really fun oh yes we had a lot of a lot LOT of a LOT of fun"

[lost-sunset-canine]

When we pick up a cat we try to calm ourself,

when we pat a cat we try to calm ourself,

if we offer you to pat a cat that we are holding,

we wish to share comfort, happyness and relaxation...

most neurotypicals that are an adult in years do not seem to understand and get upset..

we simply wish to make them feel comfortet when they are in a hurry....

-Tenshi

[drdrunkpigeon-phd]

Why does no one talk about neurodivergence and loneliness?

[luckjustkissedyouhello]

No joke, I often wonder what my life would’ve looked like if I wasn’t born in 82. If I wouldn’t be struggling to find a diagnosis at thirty-fucking-eight to explain why my brain, my life is like this.

long post is long

All through elementary school I had 1 friend, the other outcast. This happened in two separate elementary schools in the district. Two separate groups of kids decided there was something ‘wrong’ about me that they didn’t like, and that was that. In my first school, I was put in group therapy (and didn’t even fucking realize it, I was the kind of kid that just went with what they were told - always desperate to please). I don’t remember much about it other than the leader - the school psych split between 4 elm schools who would come in once a year to say ‘hey I’m here if you need me’ - and a kid talking about being hit in the face with a waffle maker (I remember being fascinated by his black eye, it was so black and puffy and it took sooo many meetings to heal properly). That’s all I remember. That’s all the school ‘did’ to help me.

One time my mom was giving me a bath, and she was like ‘why are you covered in bruises?’ (Ironic b/c she was a hitter) and I just said ‘oh the kids on the playground’ like it was normal for me to get my ass beat. She went to the principal. This was probably like 90/91. He had me write an essay about the other things I could do to stay away from the mean kids - I think he’d been told I followed the bullies around. Idk, man. I didn’t get social cues, I thought we were playing, etc. (for the record, my mom did tell me to leave the office and then told the principal she wouldn’t contradict him to me, but she thought that was an awful way to handle me getting bullied - again it was the 90s, I don’t fault my parents much for not realizing something was *seriously* different about me. That’s the point. Autistic was just for nonverbal kids. ADHD was for those so active they couldn’t sit in the classroom. Neuro-typical or Neuro-Divergent were not terms anyone know about. They didn’t discuss or know much about the spectrum of neurodiversity. They sure as fuck didn’t see it in AFAB kids like myself. I was just ‘weird’ and I have the mental scars to prove it (typing about elem school right now? Making me sweaty and nauseated- that’s how I feel when I look back at most of my childhood in school. Actually. My eyes are sweating too)

I struggled academically. When I tell people now that I was in the lowest reading groups from K-6th grade, people are surprised: I’m a librarian. But there is some kind of diagnosed learning disability in me that made it impossible for me to pass a spelling test - and I still fucking can’t - and since school tied writing with reading, they decided I needed the lowest group. They knew something was up because my compression was good but I failed the spelling tests. They tested me for dyslexia in 15 minutes one day in third grade. I sat at a machine, looked in, and pointed my finger in the direction the letters were facing. I remember it clearly. From that test, they were like ‘nope you just slow’ and put me in the remedial reading groups. Now, a large difference between comprehension and spelling would be a flag that would’ve been investigated. I know this because 2 of my sisters kids have dysgraphia. Something that wasn’t tested for in the 90s, or if it was not in a school nurse’s office.

Do you know what my grades looked like, even in college? Cs in most everything but my major classes. Grad school, I got a 3.7 - almost as if, and this is a shocker to you neurodiverse folks, I know, almost as if I could only really excel in the things my brain was interested in...wow. Shock.

I often say you couldn’t pay me to go back to high school. But then I wonder. What if I was a student now. Would they have found out about the probable ADHD/Autisim? (I’m not sure which I am but I do know I’m not neurotypical!) Would I have been given resources to help fit into the world I still clearly struggle with? Would I have so much trouble in my carrier as I have now, because people make assumptions about me being lazy or weird or not ‘right’ and dislike my mannerisms and speak and dissect everything I say? Like, no joke, I forgot how to explain the summer reading club in front of an audience once, and the librarian that went with me told the director I was awful. Shit, would that have happened if I was properly medicated? If I knew how to handle my brain forgetting shit, or how distracted the crowd of kids made me (funny thing, I can do standup just fine if the stage lights blinding me from looking out, but the second I see the crowd I get distracted and start mumbling things at people rather than the prepared jokes).

There are positives. I see *everything* happening in my story time. So i see when I’m losing the kids, I see when a sibling is beating the crap out of another. I see those kids in the audience when I talk about the summer reading club that are harassing another student, etc. I think I keep my library safer because I see every-fucking-thing going on.

But I think I’d do so much better in life if I was helped younger. I know I’d feel better about myself. I’m working through my shit self esteem but the truth is I’ve hated myself for not making it work, for not fitting in, my whole life. And the people that say ‘embrace your differences’ don’t know what it’s like for your stomach to drop out when the teacher says ‘find a partner’ because you know nobody will be yours (once, my teacher called my mom in tears because we were planning for a zoo trip and everyone else had a group, and when she asked who would take me, two groups raised their hands and she said ‘I’ve never seen her face light up like that’ - this was the exception to the norm)

Soooo.. yeah. I’m crying now. I’m not sure why I even wrote all this. This is tumblr. Nobody reads and responds much. I guess that might be why. I just...everyone neurotypical is born with a manual I just never had. And I can’t reconcile that with the idea that if I was born 20/30 years later, maybe I would’ve been at least allowed to glimpse the manual from time to time.

ETA: Talking about being undiagnosed with a learning disability and spell ‘because’ wrong every single time....i didn’t do that on purpose.

[smiling-is-victory]

every few years precure is like ‘here’s a cure who’s autistic or otherwise neurodivergent’ and every single time im like, ‘oh you mean one of my favorites? my new favorite precure?’

[1eos]

watching true crime tv, you know, as a hag does.......nd again im just wondering what goes on in the heads of parents. this one man is talking abt how his son has always had deep set anger issues since childhood nd it took them forever to get him into counseling, they only got him counseling for a few months, AND he gave the boy a knife as a gift that he apparently commits some kind of crime with.......??????? nd ik if this were a black family there’s no way in HELL a black boy would get the kind of understanding this kid got

[heythereitsace]

The Spoonie's Way

I've tried/failed at The Artist's Way for several years. I've tried to tough it out on my own (bad choice) and with real life groups (better) and weekly Zoom meets (best). But I've always struggled to keep up the habits I develop over the twelve weeks, particularly things like the Morning Pages, and I think I've realised why:

The Artist's Way is not designed with disability in mind.

For me, specifically, I've got hypermobility. That means my body bends further than it should, and it makes certain things more painful or much more effort. One of those things? Writing with a pen.

The Morning Pages are a cornerstone of The Artist's Way, and right off the bat you're told that they should be done long-hand (handwritten) AND first thing in the morning.

"Just get up half an hour earlier," the book prompts you. "Gift yourself this morning time."

No no no. My poor broken hands means that half an hour is not nearly enough time to scratch out three pages. I need at least an hour, maybe 90 minutes, to get that done. And my hands are RUINED after that. Like, don't ask me to now make breakfast, or drive, or do up buttons. Looking back now, no wonder I couldn't get through these courses! I was being asked to do MUCH more than Julia Cameron thinks she's asking, because I'm not the default body she imagines when she's putting this course together. I don't think it's malicious, I just think it's a lack of thought.

The hardest thing about it (before you realise this course isn't designed with disability in mind) is that the course tells you "This may be tough, but stick with the discipline of it. It's worth it."

That may be true for folks without jelly joints, but this was NOT a worthwhile discipline for me. I threw myself against it again and again, and all it did was hurt me, wreck my mornings, and make me feel like a colossal failure.

So, if there are any fellow spoonies also struggling through The Artist's Way, let me share with you a few tweaks that myself and other spoonie friends have used, so that you can enjoy the challenge without it being impossible.

YOU DON'T NEED TO HANDWRITE YOUR MORNING PAGES. I give you permission. If you've tried it and it hurts, or it puts your body into a bad position, or it takes way too much time out of your day, TYPE THOSE MOTHERFUCKERS. I like to use a website called 750 Words which is inspired by the Morning Pages. It's a really simple writing space which gives you a confetti celebration on the screen when you hit the target, shows you your writing streak, and converts your daily mind-dump into beautiful data which I ADORE. 750 Words is free for the first month and then you pay after that, but it doesn't even need to be that complicated - just write in a Google Doc, or whatever writing space works best on your computer. As long as it's saved and stored in a way that you can find it, and it's not going to be easily accessed by others, you're doing great.

YOU DON'T NEED TO WRITE FIRST THING IN THE MORNING. My partner has ADHD and mornings are NOT his friend. He hasn't had his meds, he's often struggling from coming to bed late, it's just the absolute worst time for him. You know when IS a good time? Writing in the evenings. He loves doing that. Once he gave himself permission to sit down and write in the evenings, he didn't miss a day, and it became an awesome daily wind-down for him. If mornings are complicated for medication or insomnia or neutrodivergent reasons, experiment with writing at different times and see if you can find a time that better fits you. Being able to write regularly is more important than writing first thing.

IT DOESN'T NEED TO BE THREE PAGES. Buy a smaller notebook. Or buy a bigger one and write just one page. Choose your own word count on your digital doc. Set a timer and write until it goes, or write until YOU feel you're finished. This is your space. Find what works for you.

TREAT IT LIKE A SCIENCE EXPERIMENT. Everyone's different, and it might take a few goes to find exactly what works for you. So, by all means, try the Morning Pages as described to start with. But if you find that it doesn't work, rather than coming down hard on yourself for 'failing', treat the whole thing like a science experiment. So, it didn't work today. Why was that? What can I tweak to get a more consistent result? And then try that change for the next iteration. You don't have to keep bashing your head against it hoping for a different result. We spoonies have it hard enough. Mould this creative tool into one that fits your hands, your body, and your life.

[p1nkc4lyps0]

If no one else does, I'm asking of your opinion on Wilbur for the ask game. But if not, how about Slimecicle? 👀

OOhohoho im doing both

Wilbur

My first impressions of wilbur were during the election arc as thats when i joined the fandom, i genuinely thought he was just a kinda chill older brother figure Tommy looked up to because i only saw revolution based content from cc!wilburs videos and the first dsmp sadist animation that got me into the fandom [ as i was subbed to her before those animatics ]

My impression now is that he's obviously not doing well mentally slipping back into his pogtopia mindset, he was never properlly villianous as the only times it was implied was through HIM saying it, kinda gaslighting himself into being a villian, the guy was just mentally ill. I think that now due to the guilt he feels with Ranboo and Ghostbur, knowing how bad limbo is thats why he's slipping back into it, he's one of the only characters where you properlly see the 'ugly' side of him, the side that snaps at people and tells them to shut up but he's no monster

I really like the moment in hitting on 16 where hes just there like lying on his stomach, testing redstone, because it's a written piece and not actual mc rp for that bit it shows a fun detail about his character. he's not sat up straight and professional nah hes lying there kicking his feet, twirling his hair i like the personality that comes with it

I had an idea for a fic called 'Chewing Tobbaco is Sticky' where c!quackity would find c!wilbur in front of an exploded burger van holding the drawing he made in Ho16 changing the places of Ranboo and Quackity on the podium, putting them both in 1st while attempting to burn the drawing of himself and Quackity kinda goes 'hey man thats not healthy???' and soft invites him into Las Nevadas now that the syndacite and bench trio now hate him and things ensue... might right up the full plan of it and post it here soon cause im not writing it so might as well get the idea out there.

Unpopular Opinion is that HE'S NOT LIKE A PROPER VILLAIN??? fucking hate the term 'Vilbur' its yucky

Favorite relationship is Tntduo cause tention and im very proud of my shapeshifter wilbur headcannon and how it works

Slimecicle

I fucking loved c!slime the moment we met him, it's a really fun character concept and i love how it was done with Slime knowing more that youd expect 'is it worth it?' fucking chills

I dont have any story ideas but one thing is that i like the headcannon that Q chose the name Charlie because thats what Tommy called him, even though its just because it was cc tommy not knowing to call him slime

My unpopular opinion is the 'slime is Qs son' kinda headcannon because c!slime is very much autistic coded whether intended or not and it feels to close to babying autistic and neutrodivergent folk for my comfort i much prefer slime and Q just being a couple of pals or maybe in a Queer platonic relationship :]

[jewishfreakshow]

Out of all the BNHA characters there are, out of the dozens of here is, villains, and students, the fandom rlly choose the three neutrodivergent kids (iida, denki and deku) to constant bully and mock and made fun of huh 😐 how are ND people supposed to feel safe in the fandom when y'all are making fun of dekus info dumping, his stimming, denkis hyperactivity, calling denki stupid, calling iida stuck up or weird and making fun of his hand motions... How are we, people that relate to these characters, supposed to feel safe when you guys are making fun of symptoms MILLIONS of ND kids have... And the worst part is it's always the same mfs that simp for Endeavor, a child abuser, and either simp for Mineta or a Mineta apologist, a little shitbag with no real backstory or personality besides sexually harrassing women...

Not even get me fucking started on how y'all treat dabi, toga, twice and shigaraki, all traumtized people who were abused and (in shiggys case) groomed into being a villain. Not to mention you people mocking and making fun of dabis skin grafts and shigarakis skin condition. Can you guys fucking imagine saying the shit you say abt them to people in real life ???

Not to mention twice... Idk y'all don't treat him as bad but y'all know he has verbal tics right? He doesn't have DID (from what I and other friends who are systems can tell but ofc if you headcanon him as a system that's valid) but like... What he says, how he says it, it's just verbal tics. The things he says to toga? He doesn't mean them. Verbal tics are basically intrusive thoughts but out loud. He honestly most likely just sees her as a daughter or little sister. He doesn't like her that way... Please I'm begging u ppl to use the few brain cells u have left