#neglectful mother

[judasdreams]

Realizing i don't actually know how to "take care of my hygiene" is absolutely jarring.

Having to fucking read through subreddits and watch videos to get any idea of what I'm supposed to be doing is fucking embarrassing.

The 2nd day after surgery and I've already had half a mental breakdown because of that shower thing.

And I thought for years that my mother couldn't possibly have done worse than she did (I knew she didn't bother teaching me hygiene things, but I didn't realize it wasn't just "how to use deodorant") and I realise i don't know how to fucking shower.

I also got groceries and I figured "Meh, as long as the driver gets this stuff inside, I'll be fine."

Truly, I was not "fine". I had to ask for help because I couldn't drag the boxes to my kitchen and bending over (and picking up stuff, moving stuff around, etc) would have taken too much of me, risked popping my stitches and I had surgery 2 FUCKING DAYS AGO.

I am so fucking embarrassed, but I don't want to injure myself either. Just because I'm not in massive amounts of pain, does it mean I should be doing everything I would have done before surgery? Nah.

Pain, BTW, is atm at 6/10? This morning it was more like my average 7/10.

I've been thinking about this pain scale too. Like, there's one very specific scale that fits me... well enough. The problem is that it doesn't take fatigue into account.

Anyway, that's it. That's the morning summed up: it's the 2nd day after surgery, I apparently don't know how to shower (I'll figure it out) because mom never taught me how and now I need to learn it as an adult, and because it is the 2nd day after surgery, I needed help putting away groceries which I usually do not need help with. All and all, I'm still happy (albeit embarrassed)

[bluerosefox]

Genie Gave Me a Brother AU

-Slams DPxDC door open and tosses AU idea on table-

Tim's parents send home an artifact that is said to able to grant wishes! While being curious about it Tim messes with the artifact and when he 'solves' it, according to legend one must solve it to get a wish, he wishes he wasn't alone anymore.

The object glows bright and as he shields his eyes he can hear.

'So you have wished it, so it shall be!'

He gets his wish in the form of a recently reincarnated ghost!King (who entered the DC world for a reincarnated vaycay... he should had known something was going to happen because CW was encouraging the break) Danny whose just a baby/toddler right now.

Basically, big brother Tim and baby Danny adventures in Gotham after that.

[bleakbluejay]

you motherfuckers have no concept of what "land back" or "decolonize" even mean. you're too busy demonizing entire groups of people, terrified, shitting yourselves, that they'll do even half of the horrors to you that you've done to them for decades or centuries. this shit comes off as hella racist for real. you hate arabs so much. you hate first nations people so much. you hate black people so much. even if you sympathize with them, you can't fucking bear the idea of them gaining freedom, independence, autonomy, safety, because you're so, so scared they'll hurt you back and cause chaos in the streets. these same people who just want to rebuild. who just want to go home. who just want to see their families again. who just want food. who just want medical care. who just want dry, warm shelter. you're so focused on the ideas of colonization, of "us vs. them", of one people displacing the other for a state to exist, that you cannot comprehend coexistence, and your only idea of peace is if an entire group of people were just gone and dead.

grow the fuck up. for the love of GOD, grow the fuck up.

[demigods-posts]

luke fumbling in recruiting percy has to be one of his greatest failures. a beautiful thing the show does regarding luke and percy's relationship is building rapport between them through shared moments like settling into camp, eating meals together, but especially through swordfighting lessons. the swordfighting scene at the beginning of episode 8 not only reveals that percy and luke already share similar beliefs about the fear-based system the gods have cultivated, but it's clear the conversation stays with percy when he fights ares and later calls out zeus on his waning skills as a father and a king. however, luke's plan fell through the moment percy learned that the winged-shoes were meant to drag him to tartarus. not only that, but the shoes nearly killed grover, a friend percy cared for deeply. if nourishing loyalty and trust was the key to ensuring a partnership with percy, then it was luke's faulty planning, arrogance, and impatience that cost him the greatest ally he could ask for.

[one-abuse-survivor]

I recently remembering a conversation I had with my mother when i was about 12-ish where earlier in the week I mentioned some things kids at school did with their parents.

She sat me down and explained the research she's done into parenting styles and outcomes (she said the books she had in the bookshelf in the room contained the information) and how a parenting style called "purposeful neglect" was what she believed raised the best kids.

Where basically she interacts with my life as little as possible, including with transportation and stuff, so I figure things out myself. That's why I never had homework help, made my own meals (other than supper, which I eventually began doing at some point but I'm sure she does it mostly for my dad), and why when I was younger I was allowed to spend nearly 24/7 in a forest near our street (plus other stuff, lol). She really emphasized the benefits of the parenting style of "purposeful neglect" (the exact name she called it) so it seemed good.

It made perfect sense when I was younger because she did that thing where she talked to me like an adult, so I felt really important learning this "big secret" most parents keep from their kids. Plus I wasn't really able to make friends at school so I didn't really know what their family lives were like. (turns out she sabotaged my friendships if I was able to make them and given the chance).

Turns out I was raised very isolated and the general amount of ignoring I got (medical, emotional, psychological, etc) was on purpose? and idk how to feel about that. Like yeah I taught myself a lot of skills (sewing, homework, special interests, cooking, basic gardening, navigation, extremely basic levels of foraging, etc) but ittttttttttttt seems odd I guess looking back?

idk is purposeful neglect a real parenting style that's had research and published books advocating it? is that "normal" to any degree?

thanks!

I want to start this by saying that although I do have some knowledge about certain parenting/teaching/child-rearing styles, I'm in no way an expert on them, so please take that into account.

That being said, I do not believe neglect is ever the right way to raise a child, even (especially) if the neglect is intentional. Sure, children need to be allowed autonomy, especially as they get older, so they have a chance to figure things out on their own. That's how we grow up feeling ready to handle adulthood, when we don't always have someone showing us what to do (this is also why helicopter parenting isn't good—because it teaches you learned helplessness and that you need others' instructions and approval to function). But we need to know someone is there if it gets too much. We need to know we are not alone against the world, and we are deserving of asking for help.

There is such a thing as letting your child have autonomy and face an age-appropriate level of challenge without immediate help, but still being there if it gets too much for your child to handle alone. Knowing that your parents/caregivers will be there if you get scared or overwhelmed is how you grow up with the confidence to try and explore things on your own, because you'll have an emotional safety net if you fall. And this is also vital for growing up knowing how to ask for help, as opposed to feeling like a burden or a failure if you need to rely on others.

No matter how much she rationalised/justified it to herself and to you, or how good her intentions were, I do think what your mother did to you is extremely neglectful and potentially very damaging and abusive. Also, her sabotaging your friendships was also really messed up, and so was neglecting your medical and emotional needs.

And, nonnie, no Google search result I've found lists this sort of parenting or any sort of research on it. But even if this was a parenting style that someone has defined and defended, that wouldn't automatically make it good. People design and defend terrible, abusive, and damaging methods for raising and educating children all the time.

I'm really sorry you went through all this. It might have helped you develop some skills you wouldn't have learnt otherwise, but it sounds incredibly emotionally damaging, and you deserved better. And, as I said before, it is possible to learn autonomy and to take care of yourself/trust your own decisions while also trusting that your parents will be there when you need help and support.

Sending a big virtual hug your way ❤️

[cup-o-stars]

Last part for old GF sketches

(Actually, most of these aren't old at all, but their average is brought down by the last picture, which I drew back in August and kept forgetting to post)

[rosemary-is-in-pesterquest]

Saw a beta kids guardians chart couple days ago and I had to take a moment when Mom Lalonde was placed in “good guardian”

[mister-001]

POISON

Conteúdo —Yandere platônico Batfamily x Leitor adolescente

Sinopse — Days pass and there's no news about you, but nothing stays hidden for long and now they know your location, but the worst part is you don't remember them, and they'd rather it stay that way forever

Warning: mentions of violence, murder, mentions of torture, violence, mentions of drugs, Reader is a girl, manipulation, violence against minors, torture, Cigarette use, negligence, joker being the joker, Yandere behavior, defined gender, blood.

chapters: 01

A/N: welcome little lamb, be very careful with your choices, they can bring you bad luck depending on which one you choose, good luck, take care of yourself little lamb, your health comes first!!

The dark path is not always the bad path...

Words cause more pain than physical injuries...

HE didn't sleep well, the dark circles under his eyes gave him away

His fingers touching the keys while his eyes never left the screen in front of him.

A little bird will never be free if its destiny is to be trapped in a cage...

Jason was frustrated, the whole way he couldn't find even a clue about his little sister

A sigh escaped his lips as he looked at the dead body on the floor.

Somentimes, a stone in the road is better than one in the kidney...

He finally found it, Tim finally found the right location, but there was just one problem...

It's the same location where Joker is...

Death cannot be avoided, you can run away, but you cannot hide forever...

Jason didn't wait when Tim said he discovered his little sister's location, he didn't even want to hear the rest, he just ran straight to the location

He doesn't want history to repeat itself, he doesn't want his sister to suffer what he suffered

He should have listened when they said to wait...

Batman stood on the balcony of a building while observing the location of the place he was given, honestly, was it a decent place?

He doesn't know, he just knows that this is exactly where his daughter is

And he won't leave until his daughter is with him, even if he has to get his hands dirty...

a heart has to be sacrificed...

It was dark, but his eyes moved around, looking around

His eyes stopped on a common person

— "sister?, is it really you?..."

Jason says as he looks at the girl in front of him, the girl's eyes moved and looked straight into his as they made eye contact, that was enough for him to truly know it was her

He sighed and quickly approached her, but his feet stopped when the tip of a katana was pointed at his neck, he was surprised and looked at the tip of the katana, before looking into her eyes.

— "bunny you-... What are you doing?..."

He says confused as he tries to smile, but his smile disappears when he hears clapping noises.

— "oh~ extraordinary, it was a wonderful show I must admit"

Jason's expression became serious when he heard that voice, and he looked at the person

— "Joker..."

— "well, I see you've already met my little masterpiece, but let me introduce you, this is my daughter, my little pride"

Joker says as he laughs, standing next to him looking at Jason

Jason looks at Joker in shock before looking at you noticing his eyes without the sparkle they used to have.

— "what did you do with her?!"

Jason says making Joker laugh even harder, Joker smiles amusedly and strokes his hair

— "well, me?, I didn't do anything, I feel offended now"

Joker says and laughs when you move his hand away from your hair, Jason wouldn't admit it but envy blinds him and he doesn't ask for a second to attack Joker while trying not to hurt you

Revenge is a dish best served cold...

Joker laughs before a pop is heard as he falls to the ground unconscious.

Damien drops the bat on the ground and looks at Joker's body on the ground, he sighs as Jason looks at him in surprise, Damien looks at him and sighs

— "what?, I did what everyone wanted to do, be thankful I just left him unconscious, it's better than letting you kill him"

Damien says as he walks past Jason, leaving him standing still and Jason sighs.

'Little Demon'

Jason thinks as he crosses his arms and rolls his eyes before looking at Joker's body on the floor.

You looked at Jason and Joker fighting and you notice someone approaching Joker, just as you were about to protect Joker, your vision went black and you fell unconscious, before you could fall to the ground someone was already holding you.

Batman held her unconscious body as he removed the needle from her neck and handed it to Dick

— "ready little bat, daddy is here now, there's no need to be scared, daddy will give you whatever you want, except your freedom, Gotham is a dangerous place, you will be safe with your family..."

His voice rings out as he rocks his unconscious body like he's rocking a baby

Sometimes, the kindest people have a double face, there is always a dark side behind all the kindness...

A sigh was heard when he heard everything, he finally let out the breath he didn't even know he was holding,

Tim was silent as he looked at the screens

He did it, he will finally be able to see his little sister again

With no one in the way, perfect

'Don't worry little sister, now no one can take you away from us again, no one can take you away from me again...'

A bat won't be able to come out of the darkness if the sun bothers it so much...

Alfred looked at the finished room, the room was next to Bruce's room, he didn't want that to happen, but he also didn't want you to be in danger in Gotham, after all, it's Gotham, every time you left, he felt worried, now he doesn't need to worry anymore, when he went to your room and saw it empty he felt devastated with worry, little did you know what awaited you in Gotham, the dark sides, without protection, you could be in danger,

But when he found out that Bruce made it he was relieved, his room was already prepared, now all that's left is for Bruce to bring you

A butler knows more than you think...

A big smile was on Duke's face as he shopped for accessories, books, and various other things.

He was on a mission when he found out about her disappearance and was more than frustrated as he took out all his frustration on the poor bandits.

But when he knew they found you he was relieved and happy

He didn't wait a second to buy you a bunch of stuff, you love that new movie that's coming out right?, Jurassic World, the new one, he knows it's horror and rated R, but he would do anything for you

So he will let you watch with him hidden from Bruce, he is eager to return to Gotham and shower you with affection and hugs

No treasure will overshadow you...

Cassandra sighed and picked up another bracelet, she already picked up several matching accessories, you and she will have everything matching like united sisters

She won't accept a no or a maybe

It will give you a life far from the life of a vigilante and a hero, a normal life is healthy

death is something that not everyone is afraid of, on the contrary, they are afraid of pain...

Barbara was simply decorating her room, she was more than eager to see you again, after days of slowly going crazy just for not hearing any news about you,

She was terrified when she found out you were with Joker,

He's not a nice guy

And you don't need it, you have it... Just it...

The quietest people don't always want to be noticed...

Damien approached Batman with you unconscious in Batman's arm, he stopped in front of Batman and stroked his hair softly while muttering inaudible words

Dick watched everything with a smile before he heard a noise and he fell to the ground when something hit him in the head,

Everyone was alarmed as they quickly positioned themselves ready to fight while Batman placed you near a wall and prepared to fight the person.

Dick touched his head slowly and looked at his hand seeing blood, he stood up and looked back while looking at the person with serious looks

— "Well, well, how stupid of you to do all this nonsense and not invite me, I thought my little puddin was stupid, but then I realized that you are lower than that"

The person says while holding the bat in their hand and smiling while looking at them

— "and you were trying to take my daughter from me, what an evil thing Batman, trying to take a daughter from a mother..."

The person says while pronouncing Batman with venom and disgust, her eyes look at each of them before she laughs

She sighs and smiles

— "Harley"

Batman says as the woman smiles amusedly and swings the bat playfully

— "Bat, kidnapping my daughter is a low blow"

Harley says smiling, but she wasn't exactly amused

— "She is not your daughter"

Batman says seriously while looking at her

— "Much less yours"

Harley says while smiling and laughing in fun

Batman looks at her seriously and Harley smiles amusedly

— "I've had it much longer than you"

— "well, I don't think I need to talk about how terrible you are as a father, if you left her walking around alone it's definitely because it was stupid,

At least I did a better job of being a mother than you were of being her father."

Harley says as she smiles and looks at Batman amusedly as Batman looks into her eyes seriously, everything goes silent for a moment

— "I just want my daughter"

Harley says with a smile on her lips before Batman sighs

— "so we have something in common, but mend your words, you want my daughter"

Batman says while Harley smiles and laughs in amusement

Damien sighs in frustration as Jason looks between Batman and Harley, Dick remains silent, confused by the situation, but understanding the mood.

— "Well, let's see who will take her then..."

Harley says while smiling amusedly and Batman looks into her eyes seriously

Damien remains silent, frustrated with the situation while making a small face of disgust.

'She is not an object to be won, she is a human like everyone else, they should treat her as a person, not as a trophy to be won, disgusting'

Jason crosses his arms and rolls his eyes.

'I don't fight with women'

Jason thinks while staying silent

Dick stands next to Jason as he sighs and thinks the same thing as Jason

Harley swings the baton and prepares to fight as Batman does the same

The two make eye contact, watching each other's movements.

Watching who will move first

Who will make the first mistake

Life is made of mistakes and they all kill you if you're not smart enough...

A/N: hi! Little lambs, I hope you liked it, that's it for now, I'm going to do part three, but I ask you to be patient, my imagination is big, but I also have to take care of my health too, sorry for the delay, I get distracted when I take it medicine, and I had things to take care of, but I was anxious and couldn't wait to post, now I'm going to get some rest, I really hope you enjoyed it, Take care of yourself little lamb, your health comes first!!.

Signed: 𝙇𝙖𝙮...

Marcador : @bellethesleepypotato @peptox @lilithskywalker @welpthisisboring @vanessa-boo @toasted-cat18 @cooki3dough @caged-birdies-blog @marsmabe @dhanyasri @trashpanda0000 @gabbiegabbie24

Betrayal comes from those we least expect...

[canichangemyblogname]

@ 911 fans—

Athena is not Buck’s mom. Hen is not Buck’s mom.

Athena has two children— Harry and May. She is their mom. Hen has two children— Denny and Mara. She is their mom. Karen is also their mom.

These black women are not the mothers of a grown-ass white man. Just as you should not pigeonhole black women into sassy, emasculating, and domineering stereotypes— which I see you all do, you should also not pigeonhole them into the stereotype role of the domestic laborer: cooking for, cleaning up after, and being a mother to a white “child.”

Shut the fuck up about “Mother Hen” and “Mother Athena.” If you aren’t talking about their relationship with their own legal children, shut the fuck up. Stop calling these women sassy and stop referring to them as Buck’s mothers.

Buck has a mother, Margaret Buckley. Margaret is his only mother. I don’t care if you dislike her, but replacing a neglectful white mother with a black woman as a caretaker is not the endearing move you think it is.

[marysblo0d]

Every time I see a Daemyra stan posting about how the portrayal of Daemon is unfair because he’s supposed to be the best husband in the world:

[pain-is-my-game]

One of the worst realizations that I have ever made is realizing that all I ever wanted was to be loved by my parents. I never would've turned out like this if they just loved me unconditionally.

[tearfulangel]

[hamletthedane]

“But think of the resale value!”

Listen, I am not paying a ridiculous mortgage amount every month just to treat my home like a fucking rental.

If I wake up one day and decide I want a giant hand-painted LOTR map on my bedroom wall, not even god himself could stop me from doing it.

[loustat-lover]

Regarding gender roles in AMCs unholy family, I think it's interesting how Lestat is Claudia's mother, narratively/subtextually, but he's also plays the role of The Husband™. While Louis is Claudia's father but he's also plays the role of the housewife.

It's not "Lestat is the man and Louis is the woman", that's reductive and doesn't do their roles justice (not to mention the thinly veiled homophobia of that thought process). The gender roles expressed during The Unholy Family era are more complicated then I see some of the fandom paint it, and I wish people could really appreciate the way that they toy with gender in the show.

It's not the same way that Anne Rice toys with gender in the books by making every vampire a (thin white) androgynous creature of the night, but it's still has it's own subtle air of gender fuckery that is arguably perhaps more nuanced then "vampires become genderless because they're no longer human".

[rosemaryyuri]

it's so hilarious how a large chunk of the homestuck fandom actually and genuinely believes everything rose lalonde says about herself and her life. she would be so happy. You think I'm cool, calm, and put together? You think I'm a reliable therapist for my friends? Tell me more.

[abuzd]