#needless to say，his help was definitely necessary

[rubys-domain]

i finally got to spend a day with my bf. needless to say, i had the best fucking day ever

[katuschka]

Draw the Line

f!OC x Josh Kiszka x m!OC 13.200 words

Summary: Jo and her husband Lucas own an art studio where Jo teaches drawing lessons. As one of her students becomes a model one day by a "lucky" chance, he soon manages to have them both wrapped around his finger (unintentionally, f'course). The situation escalates quickly when they confess about being attracted to him, respectively.

Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction, intended for adult readers. Any resemblance to real persons is purely coincidental. Also, if you're under 18, go find some other entertainment elsewhere.

Warnings (are spoilers): This is filth, ok? FILTH! Including: voyeurism, seduction, kissing, licking, fingering, rimming, booze, threesome, sex, oral sex, anal sex, light choking, light dom play, overstimulation, throatfuck, gagging, face-sitting, expressive language, open-ish marriage, polyamory

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Oh, you're such a pretty one And the naked thrills of flesh and skin Would tease me through the night Liquido, Narcotic

Ever since you can barely walk, there are people who think it’s due or even necessary to ask that one stupid question: What do you wanna be when you grow up. 

It’s quite funny, because some people can reach middle age without having figured it out! Yet there’s always this one grandpa, or aunt, or someone else’s mom who thinks they have the right to know your answer before you even reach the age to even care. 

Not me. I cared quite early on. However, my answer never satisfied anyone. Ever since I could barely hold a crayon, I wanted to be a famous painter. Famous because in my childish mind I cherished the thought that fame also meant money, and thus wouldn’t have to do anything else. 

The imaginative worlds created by visual artists always fascinated me and I wanted to be one of them. I wanted to dedicate my life to it. ‘But that’s a hobby, Jo, not a profession,’ they all said. Some of them went as far as calling me a stupid girl, which became much more common as the years went by.

I can be quite stubborn when it comes to my life choices. Sometimes it’s a weakness, other times I profit from it, depending on the situation. It proved to be a blessing exactly twice. 

The first time was when I met Lucas and I simply decided that he would be mine, even though I’ve always thought that he’s completely out of my league. He’s perfect. Toned and strong, but not too much, with overlong eyelashes and thick dark shiny hair that many a woman would die for, including me. He wears it in a high bun with an undercut, sometimes switching to a french braid when he wants to get me extra wet, because it makes him look like Ragnar. 

But more importantly, he’s kind, loving, (com)passionate and supportive. And that brings me to the second time I tried to get what I wanted, and went for it, headlong! No, I did not become a famous painter, but running an art studio where I teach drawing lessons is not that bad either. Definitely better than some boring office job. So, against all odds and with a bit of luck, I’m living the life I truly enjoy. Needless to say, it wouldn’t be possible without Lucas, his support and help. I’m the creative driving force and he’s the brain, taking care of “business”. 

He had helped me create a place that truly felt like a second home. I’m confident enough to say that it’s a cool artistic haven, bohemian in style, but well-equipped. Lucas understands my chaotic mind, always willing and able to put my visions and ideas into practice in an orderly, yet original way. I wanted my art studio to look like a tearoom, and he made it work. 

You see, my husband is a true bringer of light. At least as far as my life goes. 

Well, despite all that, having everything doesn’t necessarily mean that you never want more. I’m not talking about money or ambition, but rather about simple joys of life and that insatiable yearning to try something new. I still had secret dreams and fantasies; some of which came true. However, certain wishes should remain locked in the safe and sacred space of your own head. 

My most secret fantasy materialized in the form of one loud and vivacious pixie man. 

He was attending my figure drawing classes. I never really understood why, because he just couldn’t stand still and focus on the task in front of him. Instead, he roamed around the room, discussing other people’s progress animatedly and with sincere interest. Everyone loved him, because he managed to turn each session into a pagan sermon praising human creativity. While hardly ever finishing his own drawing, he assisted me in bringing out the best in other people. 

Did I mention he was also cute as a button? No? Well, let me tell you, there were times when I couldn’t take my eyes off him. He possesses this special kind of handsomeness that’s not always noticeable at first sight because he doesn’t flaunt it, but once you really look at him, you just can’t unsee it. A little effeminate, but with some undeniably masculine features. His face is asymmetric, and yet the proportions are just right. He has an almost boyish body, but so well toned it makes him look powerful. No, actually, I think it is his strong personality that makes him look powerful.

Long story short, Josh invaded my mind with impudence and made himself at home there. That means the thoughts he helped paint inside my head were definitely not innocent. 

But that’s where I drew the line. 

Don’t get me wrong. There were no complicated feelings involved. Josh was like fragrant, spicy wine that I wished to taste, but did not necessarily crave.

I enjoyed his company during my lessons and always looked forward to seeing him again. My fantasies and secret, made up scenarios took us a bit further – to more dangerous places – but they were my and my only.

Private fantasies. Locked up worlds to which only you have the key. Not even Lucas can infiltrate these. He has his own, anyway. 

We both know this. It’s refreshing to be able to talk about it without the fear of hurting the other. We even discussed the concept of an open marriage a few times, and even though the opportunity never presented itself, we never ruled it out as a possibility in the future. 

For a long time, we were just dreamers.

Nevertheless, the Universe works in mysterious ways sometimes. 

One course usually consists of ten weekly classes, and the one I mentioned – the one Josh was attending, that is – was nearing the end. I needed promotional pictures for my socials and Lucas once again volunteered to take them. He’s no professional photographer, but still pretty good, being able to catch the genuine atmosphere of my courses. 

Sadly, it was also one of those days when everything that could possibly go wrong, indeed does go wrong. My personal struggles that day culminated when my model cancelled at the very last moment and without explanation. The lesson was already paid for and everyone was waiting by their respective easels. 

Normally, I would probably just call it off and return the money, but this was the last session before Christmas, there was not time to schedule a substitute class, we had agreed on doing a series of quick sketches and I desperately needed those in-class photos to promote exactly that because new courses starting January were supposed to focus on croquis drawing for designers. 

See, my courses are not intended only for enthusiastic amateurs; I offer help and consultation also to many aspiring and ambitious artists and designers who feel like school classes are not enough. That’s why it’s necessary to have a good model. 

Anna had proven to be unreliable in the past, but the people attending my classes loved her for her naturally looking yet challenging poses. Models are almost like actors. Or mimes. It’s hard work, extremely boring on Monday and then suddenly physically challenging on Tuesday… I guess I couldn’t really blame her. And yet I blamed her. 

For a moment, I considered doing it myself, but I also had to instruct and advise my students, AND it was also essential for me to be portrayed in Lucas’s photos in precisely this role. 

I’m able to keep my cool in most situations. However, the stressful day had taken its toll, Lucas had not yet arrived to give me at least some emotional support and I simply lost it in front of everyone, groaning in frustration and kicking the stool in the middle of the room where my model was already supposed to sit and which was now empty. 

“Fucking bitch!”

I regretted it immediately. Very unprofessional. However, several people laughed and Laura, a sweet (and slightly roguish) sixty year old lady who attended almost all my courses including landscape painting, chimed in with “hear, hear”. 

I didn’t laugh though. I felt tired and miserable, and it probably showed. Tilting my head back and searching for some answers on the ceiling (Blank spaces inspire me, so what!), I didn’t even notice him approaching me until I felt his light touch on my shoulder. 

“Hey, Jo, I can do that.” He sounded almost bashful… which was pretty unusual, if you ask me. His cheeky grin when I finally looked at him spoke a different language though. I knew who Josh was, and what he did for a living. I knew he loved to be the center of attention. And yet…

Artistic models are often deliberately anonymous people. They cherish their privacy and like to remain unrecognized, especially when they pose for nudes. It’s understandable, because for many, it’s not their main source of income. Another good thing about Anna was that she didn’t mind being featured on my website and social media. So that’s another reason why the situation sucked. 

“Seriously? You’d do that?” I asked incredulously, crossing my arms. “Do you realize you’d have to strip to your underwear…?” 

“Yeah, about that…,” Josh scratched the scalp at the nape of his neck and giggled. 

“What?” 

I didn’t really need to ask, though, because I think we all already suspected it. And sure enough, the cheeky Laura made herself heard once again. 

“I think he’s not wearing any, Jo! Am I right, Joshy boy?” Standing there with her large cup of latte like the queen she was, she pulled her glasses down and winked at him playfully. 

Josh blushed and bit his lip, but remained determined to save the day. “Damn right, Lor!” he practically screeched and then giggled again. While I would have been willing to let him pose for us in just his briefs, I couldn’t possibly allow this. He might be a bit reckless, but I am not. Getting into trouble with his manager was not worth it. 

The possibility of seeing him totally naked was, on the other hand, DEFINITELY worth it, but still not enough to make my brain shut down completely.

“I can’t let you do that, Josh. Do you realize my husband is coming to take photographs of this lesson? And I’m planning to use them online!” 

He still seemed completely unfazed, making a long face as well as some other animated gestures with his truly beautiful hands, and it was starting to get on my nerves, honestly. “And? People have already seen all of me anyway… well, um, maybe all the parts except lil’ Joshito, but even that’s a bit… debatable.” 

I shouldn’t have laughed, but the nickname almost made me choke on the oxygen I just inhaled. He was still so nonchalant about it. With his hands in his pockets, he was swaying slightly back and forth, while still waiting for my response. It was a true match of stubbornness, with the two of us standing in the middle of the room, and neither willing to give up. He kept wiggling his eyebrows at me, and I kept chewing my lower lip. 

“Seriously, Jo. It’s gonna be fine! And honestly, what other option do you have? Well, of course, unless the others are against my idea…” To my dismay, Josh was very good at persuading people to do whatever he wanted. It comes with the profession, I suppose. When he failed with me, that little weasel naturally turned to others for help. And he was successful. Those traitors all cheered and kept nodding in his favor, so I finally gave in, albeit reluctantly.

“Fiiine,” I sighed and put on the most careworn face I could muster. “But see how miserable you make me feel?” There was still more on my mind – and tongue – but the sudden kiss on my cheek rendered me speechless. Bold! Before I could recover, he was already shirtless and taking off his shoes… which immediately felt like a final, fatal blow. 

To say that I did not expect such a sight would be a lie. If I told you I had never watched any of his videos on Youtube or TikTok, my nose would grow like Pinocchio’s. Josh is like one of those friendzoned good guys from movies that transform into objects of desire when you’re least expecting it. Not that I did not suspect him to look fine under his bleached long sleeves and beige hoodies, but what used to be a very abstract subject of my daydreams now became a tough reality that had me on a chokehold in no time. 

Thank god I was not the only one and god bless Laura once again for her insolent remarks that brought me back to reality and prevented me from staring at those flexing arms while he was unlacing his sneakers. I recovered quickly, reminding him we had a changing room for that, with bathrobes he could use. 

Josh dismissed that with one flick of a hand and proceeded to unbutton his fly. I think my head started spinning even before he actually slid the khaki fabric down his precious buttocks. I have seen my fair share of male asses and dicks – and not just in bed, obviously – but there’s a strange novelty in it when it’s someone you actually want to see naked, which I’m sure you understand. I went to check on my emergency supply of charcoal and kneaded erasers that were placed on another stool nearby. There I secretly counted to ten before I took his neatly folded clothes to put them away. 

He was sitting cross legged on the stool when I got back, grinning and tapping fingers on his knee. “So, what do you want me to do?”

“Right…well,” I cleared my throat. “You’re supposed to change the pose every fifteen minutes… don’t worry, I’ll set the timer. It could be theatrical or completely relaxed, doesn’t really matter. Just make sure it’s different every time. AND be mindful of the fact that you’re supposed to hold the pose! No fidgeting.” Knowing Josh, I stressed the last piece of information and he nodded enthusiastically to convince me he understood. It didn’t convince me at all. “We already lost some time, so there will be nine poses max.” 

“Got it, boss. So how about this?” He stood up and struck a mighty pose with his hands on his hips, chin up and chest sticking out proudly. He looked like Napoleon before bedtime and I couldn’t prevent my eyes from rolling. 

“Yeah, whatever suits you… So everyone, let’s get to work!” 

As I had expected, it proved to be an almost impossible task for Josh to keep still, and after a short while, he started talking to keep himself from moving. I wouldn’t mind if it wasn’t interrupting me in my own attempts to consult other people’s progress as I walked around the room, checking their sketches. 

We finally agreed on putting on some music during his next pose, which was that of the thinker a la Rodin. Not gonna lie, I was glad he got back in a sitting position. At least for a while. 

My relief was short-lived. 

As the timer chimed for the second time, Josh stretched his back, pulled his arms up and my breath hitched in my throat at the sight. I thought and hoped he was just making himself comfortable, relieving his tense muscles, but he decided to remain in the position. He just bent the right arm, grabbed his left elbow with his right hand, rested his head against his right bicep and closed his eyes. Obviously, that was the next pose and everyone got back to work, quickly switching their papers once again. 

I stood there mesmerised, watching his heaving chest and being intrigued by his pouty lips, when a familiar voice on my right almost made me jump. I hadn’t noticed him coming in. 

“Who’s that?” Lucas asked in a low voice so as not to disturb anyone. He stroked my back gently, but his eyes were fixed on Josh, his expression one of wonder. 

“That’s Josh…,” I replied – almost absentmindedly – as if that somehow explained the situation, but Lucas’s amused “ok…?” pulled me fully back into reality. Lucas was often present at my lessons – usually doing some boring but necessary work in the adjacent office – but never before during figure drawing, because it collided with his workout plans. 

“Yeah...uh…Sorry. He attends this course. Anna screwed me again and Josh volunteered to substitute for her today.” I looked sideways at Lucas to see him still watching Josh with a furrowed brow. I was a bit anxious that he had noticed my restlessness, but Lucas seemed lost in his own thoughts. 

“He seems familiar,” my husband mumbled after a while. 

“Yeah, I think you know him. Greta Van Fleet.” I never listened to that kind of music, but Lucas did, and Josh’s band was featured on some of his favorite playlists. I think he had even subscribed to their channel, but in Lucas’s case, that doesn’t mean much. I expected him to respond with “oh, cool,” or something like that, but he just kept staring at the dainty figure in the middle of the room that still seemed oblivious to his arrival. Just like I had been, thanks to the music. Laura finally noticed him too, and waved hello, breaking the strange spell we were both seemingly under. 

“You sure that’s a good idea?” Lucas whispered after he saluted the old lady. I knew what he meant, so I also knew his mind returned back to business. 

“No, but he insisted, and there were no other options. Just please, try to keep it all waist up and… I dunno, blurry,” I added with a telling, pained look. He squeezed my shoulder in silent response just when the timer chimed again, making Josh open his eyes at last. He immediately looked our way and his whole body jerked as if he got burned. It was followed by a shy smile. 

“Hey! I… um, got lost in thoughts a bit… I think, uh… I love this song, ya know, anyway… forgot to think about the next pose...” He got back to his incessant babbling, but it was different this time. He looked almost embarrassed as he crossed his legs again and started playing with his curls absentmindedly. 

I tried to introduce him to my husband, which in the end made the whole situation even more awkward because it wasn’t exactly one of those moments when guys just shake hands, if you know what I mean. Moreover, I knew about Josh’s preferences and my husband is a handsome man. I’m sure those pretty cheeks didn’t suddenly turn so rosy only because of the heating. 

But as I already said, I can always count on Lucas, and this was no exception. He remained very casual about it and proceeded to take the camera off the bag matter-of-factly. “I’m only here to take some pics, so everyone please ignore me and just keep doing what you’ve been doing, which, as I can see, you’ve been doing great so far.” He addressed everyone in the room with a pearly smile, making it known and clear that it was a perfectly normal situation for everyone involved. I made a mental note to thank him for it later. 

The rest of the evening went on smoothly. After two more poses, Josh stood up again, seemingly at ease once more. He was a natural after all, and in the end, everyone told him so. Laura went as far as to suggest that he should do that more often. Of course she was going to attend the next course and I suspected the main reason was not him just being a good model. I couldn’t help but agree though. After the slightly shaky start, his behavior turned completely professional and his poses were perfect, allowing my students to explore all essential aspects of human anatomy and movement. Not to mention that good male models are hard to find.

“You know, I think she’s right,” I chimed in half-jokingly, but he took my offer very seriously.  

“I had a great time, to tell you the truth, and I’m kinda free till early March, so… if you really mean it, I’m more than willing to help.” 

You know… screw it. Yes, I meant it. Even though Lill’ Prudent Jo on my right shoulder kept telling me that I was about to enter a potentially dangerous territory, I agreed. There was a strong chance that if I didn’t, I’d never see him again, and I was not yet ready for that. As a bonus, I suddenly had a strong leverage against Anna. If she wanted the job, she should start to behave in a different way. 

Christmas was fine, but even though I love the festivities, I was really looking forward to January. For the first time in my life, because I hate January. However, the picture of naked Josh – stretching like a tomcat – got burnt into my retinas and haunted me for days after the last session. 

But not only that. The pictures Lucas had taken turned out great and because it was Josh on them, as soon as I posted them online, they went literally viral, boosting my business immensely. So strictly businesslike, January suddenly didn’t seem so bad at all. 

Josh had warned me it might happen (...with a wide grin, no less… that cheeky little fucker was looking forward to it.), but to see it actually happening was something completely differrent. It was like a Christmas gift. I wanted to thank him, and as I didn’t have his number, I had to wait to do it personally. 

We were starting January 6th. I was a bit concerned with Josh’s inability to arrive on time, as he had been late to seven classes out of ten, so I told him we start at five. He arrived at quarter to six, just in time to get ready, and when I told him the truth, he blushed and promised to never do that again. 

Of course he did it again, but all within the academic quarter hour. But I digress…

Lucas was free on Mondays, which basically meant that he spent those in my office, catching up on administrative work I had been recklessly ignoring. Oftentimes he wandered into the main studio to greet the people or watch me doing my job. 

I always loved those little interludes; it only enhanced the sense of home, as well as camaraderie. Sometimes he gently brushed his fingers across my arm in passing. Other times he brought me a cup of tea and kissed my hair while doing so. When he was in an especially good mood, he arrived with a full box of chocolate pralines and offered everyone a treat before going back to emails and paperwork. We were known as the perfect couple. 

That day, Lucas lingered in the main room more than he usually does, and I soon noticed it was not only because of me. 

One moment I noticed him standing in the doorway with a cup of tea in his hand. He leaned against the door frame, his eyes scanning the room, until they fell on the naked figure in the middle. He wore his poker face, which I deemed as foolish because I know very well that he does that when doesn’t want his thoughts and emotions to be seen, while being naturally quite expressive when he doesn’t care. 

Despite his aloofness, he watched Josh intently. 

After the first week, Josh and Anna modeled alternately, five poses each. It gave Josh the opportunity to wander around again and watch other people working. It didn’t take long for him to grow unusually calm and simply observing, because it was different this time, as the room was filled with naked drawings of him: haphazardly thrown on tables, or even on the floor. His body, seen from different perspectives or even points of view. I quickly sensed what was going on. It’s just very different to seeing photographs of you, because art doesn’t necessarily reflect unfiltered reality; rather someone else’s perception of you. He knew how he looked, but seeing yourself through someone else’s eyes can be a strange and humbling experience. 

That was the second time (but definitely not the last) when I saw him blush. 

“They’re beautiful, aren’t they?” I chimed in when I approached him. He was crouching down, examining a few sketches that lay abandoned on the floor. 

“Scary,” he whispered, careful not to offend the person who drew them. “I mean, they’re fantastic, but it’s also a bit frightening.” 

“I know what you mean.” I got on my knees next to him. “Just a few expressive lines, yet you can recognize yourself, right?”

“Yeah… but at the same time, I can’t.” His voice sounded strange. Hoarse and husky. I placed my hand on his shoulder and stroked it gently. I wouldn’t dare to act that way with anyone else, but this was what he himself often did. Josh never shied away from touch. For him, it was an essential part of human communication, because sometimes there are things you simply cannot put into words. 

I looked up and noticed Lucas watching us again, his expression wild. It was not jealousy though, yet it still made me strangely agitated, because I couldn’t quite interpret it. He looked… hungry. 

Later that evening, when we finally got home, he fucked me raw. I know my husband well, so I also know this is often the result of some conflicting thoughts and emotions, as well as previous unanswered arousal. It could very easily be interpreted as lust driven just by jealousy, but I felt there might have been other reasons.

I already suspected it, but nothing could prepare me for what I witnessed later that night.

I woke up in an empty bed after midnight. At first I thought he just couldn’t sleep so he decided to go get some work done instead. Just him and his laptop in our otherwise dark living room; that was a usual scene in our household. 

After an hour of having trouble going back to sleep, I concluded I needed his embrace to help me, as his arms wrapped around my body could do the trick when everything else failed. So, I put on my bathrobe and ventured into the dark hallway to search for him and convince him to go back to bed.  

I heard him before I actually saw him on the couch; the sound of him jerking off was unmistakable. So that thing with me earlier that night wasn’t enough? Interesting. But… men, huh? Still, I was becoming more and more convinced that something kept bothering him. I was also sure he would tell me in due time if he wanted or deemed it necessary. 

Everyone needs their private space, some alone time. I respect that. I was about to turn around and go back to bed, but the sound of some music playing faintly on a loop made me intrigued. It didn’t sound like porn.

I remained standing in the open doorway, keeping myself quiet so as not to disturb his moment… when I saw it. 

It was probably some tik tok video, playing over and over again. A video of… Josh! My husband was masturbating to the more or less erotic stage poses of our little friend, further sexualized by the edit. 

And even though I had my suspicions that Josh managed to get into his head too, it was still a shock. Lucas was as straight as can be, never having mentioned any fantasies of this kind. It confused me, shook me, intrigued me even, as I stood there barely breathing… and surprised that my own jealousy was not part of the whirlwind. How could it be, when I was essentially guilty of the very same thing? 

At last, I made my way back, making sure my footsteps weren’t heard. 

I was still awake when Lucas came back to bed as well. Snuggling closer to me, he buried his face in my hair, while I pretended to be sleeping. We had to have a conversation, but it was destined for another place, and another time. 

Morning came, and my determination to talk to him about last night’s events vanished. We ate our breakfast in peace and went our separate ways. Hours went by, then days, but I never mustered the courage to open that hot topic. Everything else was pretty normal. Just our usual week. 

The week passed eventually, another lesson started, and Lucas was once again there, unknowingly confirming my theory. 

Except this time he didn’t just watch. 

The lesson went on smoothly. After it ended, I collected the supplies to carry them back to the storage. When I came back, I found them sitting on stools next to each other, deep in a low, nearly whispered conversation. 

That wouldn’t be that surprising, or unusual. We often whispered during lessons (not Josh!) and it was an unconscious habit to continue doing so even when it was no longer necessary. 

Josh had his bathrobe on, but the front was still open, more like a blanket thrown over his shoulders rather than something that was supposed to cover his naked body. What really threw me off was Lucas’ hand on Josh’s knee and the look on their faces. Now I was pretty much sure, but… the bastard! I never dared to actually do something like that, never even thought of doing it outside the confines of my own head. Ok, I might lie a bit, but – knowing I probably had no chance anyway – I simply didn’t. 

I cleared my throat, notifying them of my presence, and they both jumped as if hit by electricity. Trying to keep Josh out of it, I pretended I hadn’t seen anything weird, although I’m pretty sure my face betrayed me. However, making a scene was the last thing on my mind. I wanted answers. One answer, to be exact. And, to be honest, the sight ignited something else in my mind. 

“Jo…” 

“I'll wait in the car,” was all I said before turning around abruptly. I grabbed my coat in the hall and disappeared outside, letting Lucas take care of the rest. 

They came out five minutes later; together, but keeping a visible distance. 

When Lucas got in the car, I could feel his silent gaze on me, intent and wary, but I didn’t return it. My eyes followed the other figure, dressed in a weird, custom-made bomber, strolling hastily across the parking lot towards his own car. He kept glancing our way stealthily. 

“Jo…”

“Not now,” I interrupted him coldly. Josh got into his jeep in the meantime and I watched him drive away. “...and not here. Later. I’m hungry.” 

Lucas watched me for a few more seconds, before he finally put the key in the ignition. 

We spent the whole ride home in silence, ordered some food, which we once again ate in silence, until he just couldn’t take it any longer. 

“Listen, Jo, I…”

“I saw you the other night,” I interrupted him. 

“Saw me…” Lucas’ perplexed look quickly turned to one of utter horror. I won’t lie, I enjoyed watching him squirming like a snake on a hot plate, searching for words, before I finally decided to put him out of his misery. “But I’m not mad.”

That actually made him look even more perplexed, though he relaxed just a bit. 

“Do you have feelings for him?” I continued. I needed to be sure of that one thing. 

“No!" He seemed almost panicked. It was a dangerous question. Sex is a physical need, sometimes interconnected with feelings, but not necessarily. We agreed on that. Even our own fucking varied. It wasn’t always making love. And there were times when we weren’t even completely alone…  “No, I mean, it’s difficult not to like him… in a purely platonic way…? But this is just lust. How come you’re not mad?”

I finished my beer before I replied. “I feel the same way, actually.”

“Do you!” 

“Indeed.”

He raised his right eyebrow at me; a gesture which held a couple meanings at once. Curiosity and annoyance. He was teasing me… because he was jealous, while knowing too well that he had no right to be. 

We watched each other for a while, each contemplating what to say next, even though there was nothing else to say. Knowing it as well as I did, Lucas sighed: “Ok, so what do we do? Ignore it and forget about it?”

“We’ll see it next week, my dearest,” I replied sarcastically, because that was actually the core of the problem. Not only we’ve never been in this situation before, but Josh was also very real. And while I enjoyed his company for the reasons I already mentioned, knowing that we in fact shared this little secret made it uncomfortable for the both of us. Lucas leaned back and crossed his arms.

“Oh, funny. Fine, enthral me with your own proposal on how to get out of this situation.”

“Well,” I sighed, “sometimes it’s best to scratch that itch.”

“What are you suggesting, Jo? Surely not to seduce Josh…?”

“I’m just answering your question,” I replied evasively. “I have one too, though.”

“Which is?” 

“What were you two talking about?” For some strange reason, it made Lucas laugh. “What’s so funny?”

“Music. We were discussing music…” 

“Stop trying my patience, Lucas,” I spat. For the first time, I felt really angry. This game can be played only when there’s honesty. Lucas’ expression sobered, but he shook his head. “I’m serious. Kind of. We were discussing life performances,” he smirked at me. “And before you bite my head off, let me remind you what some of your most cherished paintings are about. It’s art, right?” he added, referring to several large canvasses depicting the two of us fucking.

“Ok, point taken,” I mumbled sulkily. He really liked those tiktoks, didn’t he. Bastard. 

We left it at that, not really sure what to do. However, the situation solved itself that very next week. Josh may look like a cherub, but he’s not that innocent. 

Josh was the only model that week, because Anna had to finish some essay which was almost past the deadline, and of course, he was late again. Storming into the room, he gave me just one worried glance and a barely audible sorry that had nothing to do with his late arrival, before he quickly changed and took up his position in the middle of the room, pretending to be a statue. That was unusual, considering his inherent restlessness.

Lucas was there too, but preferred to stay hidden in the safety of his office room. And while Josh kept avoiding eye contact with me as if his life depended on it, I noticed his numerous side glances towards that door. 

When the lesson ended, he hastily wrapped himself in the bathrobe and started helping others put away their easels and other stuff. That was even more unusual. I had half expected him to run off as soon as possible, but the boy was lingering. 

And surely, the moment everyone else left and I took some remaining supplies to carry to the storage room, he followed me like a pup, trying to explain what I had walked into the week before. “Listen, Jo, about that last t…”

“You mean when I caught you shamelessly flirting with my husband?” I interrupted him, throwing the unused paper on a huge pile in the corner. I can be merciless sometimes. His expression turned to one of utter abashment and diffidence, and it was funny to watch. I didn’t feel like he really fully deserved it, because it was Lucas’ hand on his knee and not vice versa, but this shy, empathetic and almost boyish side of him is sexy as hell and completely intoxicating. 

Shamelessly, I wanted a sip of that tasty cocktail. Nevertheless, I fell into my own trap. 

We were shrouded in semi darkness, with just enough light coming from the main room through the open door to allow us to see our expressions, enhanced by sharp shadows. The dim light suited him and his Adam's apple looked even more prominent as he swallowed. 

“I… It…” unusually at a loss of words, he resorted to the second best thing he mastered quite well: touch. 

A completely innocent touch. Just his hand sliding down my shoulder, his fingers gripping my arm firmly but tenderly. It shouldn’t have surprised me that much. Josh just likes to really physically connect with people in order to be understood. But it did take me by surprise. I had imagined those fingers wrapped around my bodily parts many times before.

My immediate reaction was completely involuntary. I just moaned. I mean… aloud. 

Josh looked taken aback – and quite understandably – but instead of retreating, those fingers slid gently and slowly down to my elbow, as if testing me. Needless to say, I failed the test, although it wasn’t that blatant this time. 

“Seriously?” he whispered. The puppy dog face was gone, replaced by something much more fierce… and excitingly dangerous. “What’s the deal with the two of you?” 

“Yeah, Jo, what’s the deal?” I saw him enter, but Josh did not, and the suddenly cast shadow accompanied by Lucas’ husky tone visibly startled him. 

It was like a strange pantomimic theatre nouveau. A play of shadows, touches and slow movements. Josh let go of me and his palm, open theatrically like a flower in mid air, was suddenly covered by Lucas’s right hand while the left one slid lightly down Josh's spine until it found purchase on his lower back. Josh tensed, but didn’t withdraw from the touch. In fact, he pulled Lucas’ right arm closer to him instead. Looking at me intensely with those big dark eyes, his lips slightly parted, but all that came out was a soft exhale. Being much more hesitant and restrained than my husband, I reached out to caress his cheek, and he leaned into my touch. 

Suddenly, he tensed again, as if being awakened from a slumber. “Ok, what’s going on here?”

“Do we make you feel uncomfortable?” I wasn’t teasing. It was a genuine question.

“No, not uncomfortable. That’s why I’m asking. If I felt uncomfortable, I’d tell you both to fuck off.”

It took one shared fleeting glance between me and Lucas to escalate the situation beyond the point of no return. It was a true now or never moment.

“I have a few questions.” 

Josh made himself comfortable on our large, U-shaped couch and took a sip of red wine from the glass I just handed him. 

He had arrived in his jeep just about three minutes after us, giving me no time to make this place a little bit more… presentable. But honestly, who cares. He’s a rockstar, I’m a painter, and I was about to see him naked in a completely different situation. Dust if you must; I shall not. 

“Shoot,” I replied, leaning against the kitchen counter. 

“Uh… ok… well, the first one’s obviously why.”

Naturally. At the same time, it was a pretty stupid question, with the three of us evidently sharing the why not mindset. I just opened my mouth to respond, but Lucas beat me to it. “Why what?” 

Lucas, too, was still standing. Moving closer to the couch from behind, he grabbed the headrest on each side of Josh’s head and leaned down a bit. 

We were circling Josh like prey, but the little cherub didn’t even flinch, convincing me he was well aware as to why… and liking it very much. The fucker just wanted to hear it. 

“Why me, obviously,” he responded with a raspy voice and took another sip. 

“Have you seen yourself?” I chimed in. 

Josh sighed and leaned his head against the headrest, his curls brushing Lucas’ clothed stomach teasingly. See? He was VERY well aware, already playing the game along with us with gusto.

“Took me a few years to really see myself, but yeah.” His jaw tightened and he smirked at last. “Alright. Point taken. I’m irresistible.” He straightened again to help himself to another gulp of wine without the risk of spilling it, allowing Lucas to rub the nape of his neck gently. Josh leaned into the touch, but Lucas asked anyway: “Is this ok?” It was very important to build trust in this new situation. 

“Totally,” Josh whispered and blinked, before he focused his gaze back on me.

“Ok, next question. Have you two done this before?”

Lucas stopped playing with Josh’s locks and put his hand on Josh’s right shoulder instead. Our little friend acknowledged the gesture with a stealthy side look, but his main focus remained on me, even when Lucas spoke. “No… Well, we… shared a bed with another couple once, but it wasn’t as exciting as it may sound, because everyone was only interested in their respective partners in the end. I dare say it turned out to be even a little bit awkward eventually. Chemistry’s important in such situations, and it wasn’t there.” 

We certainly couldn’t complain about the lack of it this time. On the contrary, it was so strong it turned the air in the room into a thick soup of tension and growing lust. I kept eye contact, watching Josh’s eyelids droop as his lips transformed into a subtle pout. Our Ganymede was playing along, exerting his own power and dominance. At least over me. 

The evening was not planned, the roles were not set and my own imagination had never led me this far despite me being the original author of this bold proposal. Now I was dying to know what was going on in his pretty head and what he might have in store for me. 

His demeanor changed in a snap, and he turned his head a bit, finally looking up at Lucas like a puppy waiting for his master’s next move. I had to hide behind my own glass to prevent Lucas from seeing my face. Unnecessarily, because he wasn’t paying attention to me, anyway. “... and outside your mutual experience… how about… men?” Josh looked directly into Lucas’ eyes, who returned the gaze and answered truthfully: “No.” 

Josh’s eyes widened slightly and he bit his lower lip. He had probably already expected it, but hearing it is always different. 

It was pretty obvious what he was thinking, but even if it weren’t, his growing bulge told stories of its own. His sexual intelligence mesmerized me, though, as he willingly allowed Lucas to keep the high ground. It was no doubt a vulnerable moment for my husband, and I admired him for how well he’d been handling it so far.  

I hated to break their little moment, but there were still other things that needed to be addressed. “Speaking of chemistry… I want you to know that I’m perfectly fine with just… watching. The last thing I want is to make you feel uncomfortable.” Josh’s eyes snapped back to me, his expression a bit hard to decipher, but it still managed to increase my heart rate significantly. Then he spoke up and said heart jumped up my throat. 

“I…uh… think you underestimate me, Jo. I consider myself to be a very eclectic person, especially… uh… when it comes to fun. Which brings me to my last question. What are you two actually planning to do with me?” 

My breath hitched as I watched him lick his upper lip with the tip of his tongue playfully. We had no plan. We couldn’t possibly have one, not without his participation, and he was quite aware already. It wasn’t really a question, it was an offering. 

“Whatever you want…,” was all I managed to choke out. 

“I think I want a kiss. Just show me how much you want this, yeah?”

I swear I could hear something snap, and the last remains of our restraints were gone with a puff. Josh was game. I wanted to ask from whom, but there was no longer room for questions, because Lucas took action. Without any further ado, he leaned forward again, grabbed Josh by the chin and forced him to turn his head to the side. I’m not sure if my brain slowed my perception of time or if they really looked at each other for so long, but it was fascinating to watch. 

And then Lucas fulfilled Josh’s wish. Softly at first, but Josh made it clear he didn’t come here to cuddle. He opened his mouth without being asked to and their tongues met in a very sloppy and passionate kiss.

Josh reached behind Lucas’ head to grab the nape of his neck while my husband’s hand slid down to Josh’s throat, which made the latter moan loudly and I had to pull in my lips to stifle my own whimper. They paid me no mind though, lost in their own realm where they both ruled, each one in a different way, each one holding a different kind of power over the other. 

What a mesmerizing sight. Truly. I watched in awe the dark and dirty fairytale that was just being played before my eyes. I really would be happy just watching it. My stomach muscles contracted violently and I could feel my panties absorb the overflowing wetness. I took the glass from Josh’s outstretched arm, which became an inconvenience. I put it on the kitchen counter and poured myself more wine.

In the meantime, Lucas climbed over to join Josh on the couch, where they continued with their mutual exploration; taking their time. Lucas was on his knees, still hovering over Josh slightly, holding his head in both hands now, fingers scratching the buzzed sides. The huge amount of energy that had been building inside of him for hours (or weeks) was palpable, and it begged to be released. 

With his head tilted backwards, Josh’s hands slid down Lucas’ chest, searching blindly for the hem of his shirt, tugging at it tellingly. I downed the glass, bracing for what was to come,  as Lucas broke the kiss and pulled his arms up, letting Josh do the job. They were both almost breathless, watching each other with eyes wide open. I couldn’t blame them; my own were popping off. Suddenly, Josh grabbed Locas’ bare sides and brushed his open mouth and nose hungrily against Lucas’ chest, taking him in with all the senses. 

The wildest fantasies couldn’t compare to this overwhelmingly intense show. I wasn’t ready, and with the wine already making my head spin and my cunt burn, I myself was getting completely lost in the intensity of the moment.

“I… really…,” Josh breathed out before he licked his lips and his fingers brushed the button of Lucas’ jeans. 

“Good god,” my husband muttered and closed his eyes. “Ok, yeah, go ahead, please…” With that, he straightened and stood up, once again towering over our sexy guest. Josh looked up with his mouth slightly open to allow those slow, deep breaths in and out. His fingers brushed over Lucas’ prominent bulge, making Lucas whimper. “But don’t tease.”

Josh smirked. Teasing was exactly what he was planning to do. 

He pulled the zipper down, keeping the movement excruciatingly slow, and carefully pulled the pants low enough to set Lucas’ throbbing dick free. “No underwear, tsk,” he teased. “Another thing we have in common.”

“What’s the firs…” Lucas tried to ask, but never finished the sentence, because Josh suddenly swirled his tongue over the already leaking head like a hungry tomcat. 

“Oh Jesus!” Lucas panted, his finger running through Josh’s curls. “No more teasing! You wanted suck, so take it. Suck!”

And so he did. And I suddenly wished I had a dick, because while I considered myself to be quite good at it, I hardly ever managed to make my husband really weak in the knees. Josh, on the other hand, got him there in less than three minutes and Lucas had to stop him eventually. 

“Good?” Josh grinned.

“Too good, and you know it, you bastard,” he growled before turning to me. “Jo, could you… the box…”

“Oh, sure,” I nodded, rushing to retrieve a small box filled with necessities from our bedroom. Once there, I decided to quickly change as well. He wants fun, so let’s have fun. I chose a black lacy top with ribbon lacing at the back and no underwire. No panties either. let the pussycat breathe. I had showered before the lesson, so whatever was going to happen, I was ready.

I checked myself in the mirror one last time before going back. Letting my hair down was the last, finishing touch to make me satisfied with what I saw in the reflection. My tits looked heavy supported just by thin lace and my cheeks were flushed from the excitement. 

It only grew as the muted sounds of their voices reached me through the open doors. Lucas’ teasings and promises, uttered in his lowest register, followed by a naughty giggle. It fueled my imagination even more. 

Were their limbs already entangled? Restless hands roaming every inch of their flesh? Did their eyes meet often, sharing the unspeakable? Soft moans reached my ears as I stood there, wondering. I longed to see it all, and hurried back. 

They didn’t notice me at first. I walked around the couch stealthily, careful not to disturb the intimate foreplay. 

And as I had expected, both were already naked. Josh, lying on his back with his arms behind his head. He had his eyes closed, getting lost in time and space. Lucas was crouching between his spread legs, his parted lips travelling across Josh’s chest, while his hands kept Josh’s elbows in place. 

I watched as he darted his tongue out, swirling it around Josh’s left nipple, leaving the areola glistening wet. Josh tilted his head back and moaned again, arching his back ever so slightly while doing so. 

“Oh dear god,” I muttered at last, informing them of my presence. 

Josh just opened his eyes while Lucas straightened a little, his hands stroking Josh’s exposed triceps’ while he turned around to look at me. “She’s beautiful, isn’t she?” he asked Josh with his eyes still on my. 

“Stunning.”

Feeling a bit uneasy under their sudden scrutiny, I took a step forward and handed Lucas the small box, before I dared to sit on the floor right next to Josh’s head. “Hey,” I smiled shyly. 

… which he answered with a toothy grin. “Why so coy all of the sudden? Where’s my bold lecturer? Shouldn’t I be the one to feel bashful?

“Are you?”

“No… especially not now when I see what this does to you.” 

Always a showman. I rolled my eyes in mock annoyance and he grinned even more before his eyes fell back on Lucas, who had bent down again to pepper Josh’s lower abdomen with tiny kisses. 

“I love when he does that to me,” I whispered. “Feels good, doesn’t in!”

With a melodic “mmmmhhhhn,” Josh closed his eyes again, panting softly through his parted lips as Lucas dared to venture lower. I watched how his finger enveloped Josh’s hard dick, giving it a few tentative strokes, before he suddenly grabbed Josh’s legs under his knees, forcing them upwards, making him gasp. 

“Can I kiss you?” I asked, making him open his eyes again. 

“I think you must.”

And I did. I had been longing to taste them for so long that I was NOT coy about that in any way. I took advantage of him keeping those lips parted and licked the inner corner first before I pushed my tongue into his waiting mouth, making him moan into mine. 

Or perhaps it wasn’t just my doing. He gasped again soon after, breaking the kiss. “Fuck, you’re good at this!” It didn’t belong to me, as I could immediately see. 

Lucas paused for a bit, just to look at us. “That’s because she loves it,” he grinned deviously before returning to Josh’s ass, eliciting a few more profanities from his pouty mouth. The sight and the sounds were making me hungry, and I went for Josh’s exposed neck, licking and sucking on the delicate skin. He grabbed the back of my head to prevent me from stopping. He loved that. I could HEAR it! Oh god, he sings even during sex. So beautiful. 

Lucas straightened again and with a long, steadying intake of breath, he opened the box to retrieve a bottle of lube and a pack of condoms from it. It was time. 

“Is it ok if I stay like this? I wanna see everything,” Josh breathed out in a husky tone, watching Lucas apply a generous amount of lube on his fingers. 

“Whatever you want, pillow princess.” With that, he pushed Josh’s legs even more upwards, letting them rest against his listed arm while he started circling Josh’ entrance with the middle finger of his other hand. He watched me, looking a bit lost in thoughts and I wondered what was going on inside his head. I didn’t have to wonder for too long, though.

“Hold him!” he ordered and I quickly obeyed, loving the idea. 

“What?!” Josh bursted out when I sat behind his head and grabbed his wrists, pulling his arms back behind his head. At the same time, Lucas pushed the finger inside. I looked down into those wide-eyed pools and he swallowed hard. “Not what you expected?

“I… I…”

“Not what you want?” Once again, I didn’t mean to tease. His pleasure was the ultimate goal, after all. 

“I..yes…I want…”... Lucas added a second finger… “Yes!” 

“Wonderful, baby. Enjoy,” I smiled down at him. 

I knew Lucas would be careful, and Josh’s relaxed face told me I was right. And Lucas had been right too; I loved this a lot, thanks to his gentleness. I always wondered what it would feel like if I had a prostate though, feeling maybe even a bit jealous sometimes. This time, I could at least watch it. Tiny droplets appeared on Josh’s forehead and and a string of muttered ‘fuck’s’ flew from his pretty mouth when Lucas curled those fingers. 

“Fuck…” Josh breathed out again after a while. “Fuck me already!”

Lucas’s eyes visibly darkened at those words. He let go of Josh’s legs, carefully withdrew and crawled over him, looking him directly in the eye. “That was hot,” he hissed. “Beg again!” 

“Please… fuck me,” Josh whimpered, tugging at his wrists restrained by my firm grasp. 

“Good boy.” With deliberate precision and skilled swiftness, Lucas put on a condom, poured more lube on top of his dick, spread it all over and positioned himself. between Josh’s outstretched legs. One of his feet slid down from the couch, so Lucas grabbed him again under his knee and threw the leg lovingly over his shoulder. “You’re a very pretty whore, Josh Kiszka,” he crooned and slowly, carefully entered. 

I bent down to kiss our very pretty whore whole Lucas waited for him to adjust, and I didn’t stop until I felt him move. Josh arched his back again and his soft pants soon turned to moans, and moans to cries when Lucas quickened his pace, holding Josh’s hips firmly. 

I wondered why Lucas was so quiet though, and I learned the reason soon. This night…it was just too much, it was too unexpected and overall so sexy there was a pool between my legs just from watching it. He exhaled ruggedly all of the sudden, and then again, and at last he cried out before he collapsed on top of Josh, panting. 

“I’m sorry,” he muttered right next to his ear, making Josh chuckle breathily. 

“For what? God, that was…”

“Quick.”

“Yeah, but…”

I let go of Josh’s wrist and collapsed into the corner of the couch, trying not to laugh. Lucas pulled out carefully and helped Josh into a sitting position before he disposed of the condom quickly. When he came back, He offered Josh his outstretched hand. “Stand up.”

“Why?” Josh asked as he hesitantly took it. 

“Just stand up.” My husband looked visibly nervous, but determined, and I knew immediately what he was going to do. For the first time in his life. 

He kissed the slightly bewildered Josh first, softly on the mouth, before he got on his knees before him. “Oh…ok,” Josh panted. 

I sucked in breath, unsure what to do… or maybe just feeling second handedly Lucas’ own uncertainty. “Lucas, if…”

“Shut up.” He brushed his fingertips across Josh’s lower abdomen first, shadow tracing all those kisses he had planted there before, before he let them circle around the base of Josh’s erection. And, at last, he opened his mouth and wrapped his lips around the head. 

Josh closed his eyes and with a furrowed brow, he muttered an encouraging “yes”. Emboldened, Lucas tried to venture further, only to make Josh hiss in discomfort. I bit my lower lip. Teeth. 

“Imagine her mouth,” Josh said softly. “What does she do?” Lucas tried again and Josh shuddered, but it was different this time. He smiled at last. “Uh huh…hmmmm, yes,” he breathed out. “Yes, that’s it. 

Slowly, Lucas found the way, as well as the right rhythm. He was hell bent on making it right. Needless to say, he had a very empathetic teacher. He stroked Lucas' hair with one hand while the other ventured behind his ear, holding him firmly without forcing him down. And Josh was not a faker; when he made a sound, you knew it was genuine. 

“I’m gonna come,” Josh moaned after a while and his fingers slid gently to the nape of Lucas’s neck. He was asking for permission. 

I could see that Lucas tensed slightly and visibly hesitated, so I quickly slid down on my knees right next to him and opened my mouth. Josh blinked at me, understanding slowly appearing on his face. “Come on, I want it,” I urged him. He pulled out and I quickly swallowed him whole, pressing my flattened tongue against the underside of his already twitching dick. I continued to suck, determined to save every drop as he shuddered above me with a heavy sigh. 

After I finally released him, he fell backwards on the couch, panting wildly. I already swallowed most of his cum, I could feel it burning my throat slightly, but there was still a strong aftertaste when Lucas grabbed my jaw and kissed me deeply and hungrily. 

“Good?” I panted when he withdrew. 

“So good.” 

“Jesus Christ…” we heard Josh mutter, rubbing his hand over his face before he let it run through his messy curls. I looked at him and smiled before I stood up, joined him on the couch and exhaled slowly, content, but not fully satisfied. Lucas remained sitting cross legged on the floor in front of us. His gaze darted between me and Josh, and I couldn’t really tell what he was thinking. With his arms resting on his knees, he looked calm and tired. 

“What about you, Jo?” 

I slowly turned my head towards the source of that deliciously raspy voice. Josh’s eyes looked almost black in the dimmed light, making the whites sparkly in contrast. He smiled and ran a finger back and forth across his lower lip, eyeing me inquisitively. 

“What about me?” I smiled weakly back. 

He cleared his throat first before he replied. “I’d really love to reciprocate.” 

“What do you mean by that, exactly?” I teased, my mind already there, browsing through all the possibilities. 

His reddened cheeks literally glowed and I found myself unable to break eye contact, still examining what was hiding behind his dilated pupils. I didn’t notice how his hand slid towards mine until he grabbed it and drew it up to his plump lips. I expected him to kiss my fingers, and he did, but… his tongue then slid between my index and middle finger, licking suggestively. He kept eye contact the whole time and I squealed a bit taken aback by the lewdness of the gesture, despite everything that already happened. 

Josh’s pillowy mouth between my legs? Oh, fuck yeah! “I’d really love that.”

“May I?” He asked Lucas almost hesitantly.

“Go on, she deserved it.”

I expected him to get on his knees, but instead he slid lithely on his back again and rested his head on a small cushion in one of the corners of the couch. “Come on then, sit.” 

“Are you sure?” 

He rolled his eyes and grabbed my arms, making me almost tumble over him, making us both giggle. Regaining my balance, I positioned myself carefully and hesitated again, so he grabbed my ass and pulled me down, making me squeak. I dared to look down, meeting the same gaze that he had shared with me earlier that evening in the storage room. Fierce…and dangerous. The very next second I understood why, as he darted his tongue out and let it flutter over my clit with insane speed. I tensed and arched my back, opening my mouth in a silent scream. 

Mercifully, he gently enveloped it with his lips instead and started licking it tenderly. Honestly, that was probably even worse. In a matter of seconds, I was a moaning mess, bending over the headrest. 

Naturally, I didn’t hear Lucas move until he was right in front of me. He was hard again and ready to continue. “I think I need your help, bitch.”

Not the first time he called me bitch. Never during an argument, always when he wants to cum. It makes me wild, to be honest, and that’s exactly what he wanted. I grabbed him by the hips, pulled him closer and swallowed him whole. He grabbed my hair to make sure I knew who was in charge and pushed again, thrusting all the way until he hit my throat. And then again. 

I relaxed, focusing on tbe head of Lucas's dick deep in my throat, but it took one swift flick of Josh’s tongue around my clit to throw me completely off balance and I gagged violently. 

It was followed by his own loud whimper that reverberated through my pussy. That kinky little bastard. I felt a subtle, rhythmic movement somewhere behind me and tried to break free from Lucas’ grasp to have a look. “Yeah, he’s jerking off,” he groaned impatiently. “Suck!” 

For a fleeting second I imagined seeing myself from the outside, the whole scene. My head spun and the sensation between my legs became almost unbearable. I was acutely aware of every tiny licks that sent me further towards the edge… and then I was falling. Lucas had to pull out just to let me breathe. 

Slowly and carefully, I lifted myself on my knees, allowing Josh to get from under me. I was aware we weren’t done. Not after my husband had called me bitch. It also meant he was in the mood for some pretty rough fuck. However, he didn’t move, his hard-on now literally resting against my flushed cheek. “Well, well, what a precarious situation, right?” 

His tone confirmed my suspicion, but still told me nothing about his plans. “I think that pussy’salready pretty swollen now. Hmm, that’s always good. Do you want to fuck her, Joshy boy?” I tensed at those words, so hot and lewd and unexpected. A hand ghosted over my left asscheek, making me shiver. 

“Oh yeah, you do, don’t you. Go ahead then.” 

The continuing silence made me nervous. “Josh?”

I felt him shift behind me, I felt his skin brush against my back and closed my eyes, reveling at the sensation. Then suddenly, it was his hot breath near my ear and he whispered: “Can I, Jo?” 

“Oh god, yes!” I blurted out. 

I felt him shift again, reaching for a condom. A moment later, I felt those hands again, as he grabbed my hips and pushed them up. I looked up, meeting Lucas’s dark eyes, my mouth already open and ready. “You’re whore,” he said. “I love it.”

And then Josh entered me. And then I was completely full, and barely breathing.

It was overwhelming. Josh was hitting my g-spot just right and it took only a few more minutes until I came hard again with my mouth still full of Lucas’s dick. I moaned around it as he held me by the nape of my neck and continued to fuck my mouth. I gagged violently and he let go just to let me take one deep breath before he plunged back. I convulsed and my throat constricted around his head, making him moan. I loved the sound. My whole body tensed and another wave of orgasm reverberated through it, making my pussy spasm and clench around Josh’s dick.  

He slowed down and hesitated, and his grip on my hips loosened. He was no longer holding me firmly, he just stroked me soothingly. I looked up, begging Lucas to tell the other one that it was all ok, because I couldn’t. “Go on, she absolutely loves this.”

It didn’t convince him. He was still rock hard, I could feel it. That wasn’t the issue. Losing my patience, I clenched my walls on purpose now, making him whimper, before I mustered all my remaining energy to hiss: “For fucks sake do your worst.”

I’m not kidding, he growled. I swear, it’s true. 

I felt almost like a ragdoll between them, with my chest pressed against the headrest and clutching it with both my hands until my knuckles turned white. My thighs were shaking and I was gasping for air, but neither of them stopped. After a while, Lucas grabbed me by the hair and pulled my head up. I looked up at him with my mouth still open, long ropes of saliva still connecting it with his dick somehow. He didn’t meet my gaze; he was looking at Josh instead, while jerking himself off frantically right in front of my face. 

“Does it feel good, fucking her?” he growled. I could feel Josh’s fingertips pressing harder into the ample flesh of my hips as he slowed down his pace considerably. I couldn’t blame him. Lucas’s tone was dangerous. 

“ANSWER!”

“Yes…” Only then I realized how much I wanted to hear that, but Josh stopped in his movements, unsure if that was the right answer. 

Me being familiar with that menacing tone, I knew it meant Lucas was extremely aroused. Only this time, I couldn’t really tell where this was heading, and my own apprehension only grew. He soon answered my unspoken question, making me gasp.

“Would you like to fuck ME?” 

I couldn’t really see what happened next. I could only feel and hear it. I only imagined the shock on Josh’s face, drawing it with sharp lines inside my head, inspired by Josh’s sharp inhale. It was followed by a whispered breathy ‘oh’ and a whimper as his dick twitched inside me. One involuntary thrust forward, followed by three more… and he was spent. 

I DID watch how it all reflected in Lucas’s eyes, growing more fierce with each passing millisecond as he stared at the other man behind me with his lips slightly parted in surprise. 

“Open!” he ordered suddenly. I thought he meant me, so I obligingly opened my mouth and stuck my tongue out, but Lucas pushed me slightly aside and I felt Josh shift above me. He leaned himself onto the small of my back to get closer, grabbing the headrest with one hand and my shoulder with the other for support. I could feel he barely recovered; he was still shaking. And yet… In my own post-orgasm gaze, I dared to glance sideways only to see him do just what I had done a second before. 

Looking down at us, Lucas smirked. “Look how obedient he is, my love.” The words, while spoken to me, were not meant for me at all, and Josh inhaled loudly, dutifully bracing for what was to come. Lucas grabbed him by the hair and rammed his dick deep in his throat. Josh’s cheeks puffed out and he barfed chokingly, while his eyes rolled up into his skull, making him look almost possessed. The obscenity of it was the last impulse Lucas needed to paint Josh’s throat with hot spurts of his seed. 

Lucas pulled out just enough for Josh to be able to swallow. Only then did he let go of his hair completely, letting him take a breath. 

Josh collapsed onto my back completely now, with his cheek resting on my shoulder, and his quickened breath resonating against my ribcage. I wrapped my arms around Lucas’ waist, resting my forehead against his belly. He stroked my hair gently, while wiping sweat from his forehead with his other hand. We must have looked like a mannerist sculptural group. 

“So, everyone good?” Lucas said at last. 

I felt Josh chuckle against my shoulder and I started giggling uncontrollably. 

We showered separately, allowing ourselves a moment of privacy to fully absorb what had just happened. 

Lucas ordered some Indian food and we are on the very same couch just like three good friends, except we were all still naked. And because we also finished the bottle of wine and opened another one, I refused to let Josh drive back home. No, he was staying, end of discussion. Our bed was large enough. 

Despite my previous exhaustion and unusually deep sleep, I was roused later that night by a peculiar sensation; as if I was sleeping in a rocking cradle. Half awake and with my eyes still closed, my brain tried to make sense of it, until I heard the unmistakable sound of the two of them fucking on my right, literally just a few inches away from me. They were trying to be quiet, and moving slowly, swaying together in a spooning position like two boats rocked by the waves. Their deep breathing and the sensuous, slapping sound of lubricated flesh gave them away in an instant and I could feel the heat emanating from their skin. I listened in silence for a minute or two, feeling almost like an intruder in that very intimate and very carnal moment. 

But this was my bed, and my husband, and basically my idea. I was not going to let them leave me out of it like that. 

I turned my head to the side slowly and opened my eyes, instantly meeting Josh’s. They widened in bewilderment, the white of his eyes shiny in the near darkness, and I responded with a cunning smile. 

Lucas had his arm wrapped around Josh’s torso and I stroked the back of his hand with my fingertips. It immediately made him stop. They lay unmoving in complete silence, waiting for my next reaction. 

“Go on,” I whispered, while my hand traveled further down, brushing against the tense flesh of Josh’s abdomen until it reached his rock hard cock. I wrapped my fingers around it and gave it a tentative squeeze in unison with Lucas, who moved again. 

Josh finally broke the silence and immediately tried to stifle the moan by biting his lower lip. What a blasphemy! I wanted to hear that beautiful voice. I wanted it to reverberate between the walls of our bedroom until the window panes rattled! So, I grabbed his jaw with my right hand and forced it open again with my fingers. He continued staring at me with wide eyes and I snuggled closer, licking his parted lips with my tongue while stroking him slowly with my other hand. 

His eyelids fluttered closed and he moaned loudly in my mouth. 

“Hello, sleeping beauty,” he mumbled afterwards. 

The darkness around us was slowly subsiding, but it wasn’t just my eyes getting used to it. Dim, blue light gradually filled the room and I could finally see more than just their outlines. It was already early morning. Lucas lifted his head and looked at us for the first time, winking at me. The motherfucker felt no shame. He wanted him all for himself. “You bastard,” I spat and he responded by bottoming out forcefully, making Josh arch his back and grab my arm instinctively. I kissed him again in response while still pumping him, only this time I forced my tongue inside his mouth, licking into it. 

“You’re so sinfully pretty,” I mumbled against his lips when I finally broke the kiss. “I wanna paint you as a fallen angel.”

“A fallen… angel…?” he whispered back shakily in between his pants that matched Lucas’s languid thrusts and my strokes.  

“Yeah, watching you being fucked by my husband is making me all wet. What a sight. So beautiful...” 

Lucas grunted and Josh just shook his head in a silent no. 

“Yes, you are. See?” I let go of him and reached between my legs, gathering some of the wetness before I pushed my fingertips inside his mouth, making him suck on them. Josh obliged, in his docile attempt to please me. 

We were literally using him and he was very much aware. And loving it. With his plump lips still wrapped around my fingers, Josh looked at me again and something in his eyes changed. I swear I could see undiluted depravity in it and it made my head spin even while still lying safely on the pillow. He was indeed a true piece of art.

“What are you gonna do about it?” I whispered daringly and he grasped my wrist and pulled my fingers out of his mouth, before he grabbed a handful of my hair, letting me know that he was not yet completely giving in. He was not as strong as Lucas, but nicely toned and could still overpower me if he wanted. I felt the power emanating from him, boosted by the sexual stamina. I could tease him all I wanted, fascinated by how comfortable he was in letting me, but – clearly – enough was enough.  

“Turn around,” he breathed out and I quickly obeyed, completely taken aback by the sinful idea and breathing in their mixed manly musky scent that wafted around us. Lucas halted his movements again, letting Josh position himself. He pressed his right thigh against mine, using it as leverage. Feeling his head between my folds, I let out a shaky breath and pushed back, making him enter me fully. 

Now it was me breathing heavily, still trying to convince myself that it was not all just a dirty dream. The time almost ceased to exist in the steely morning light. We were no longer silent, all moving in a synchronized rhythm set by Lucas. He was like a metronome, setting the pace as we all moaned into it, writhing like snakes in the lustful melody. Josh wrapped his arm around me, pulling me closer while I reached behind me to stroke his hair. “So soft,” he mumbled, kneading my tit. I took another deep breath, taking in the overwhelming mixed scent of their heated bodies. For a moment I wondered what it would feel like to be in between them, penetrated by both and being pushed to the brink of madness by the combined, double stimulation. 

Josh came first, and no wonder, because he was the lucky one now, being fucked while buried balls deep in the warm softness of my pussy. He let out a prolonged, high-pitched whimper and I could feel him twitch inside me. I reached down and grabbed his thigh while he trembled with his face pressed in the nape of my neck, his hot breath sending shivers down my spine. My hand traveled up his thigh until I reached his ass and dug my fingernails in his hairless, juicy flesh, making him squeak. Lucas kept fucking into him mercilessly as if nothing happened and Josh held onto my forearm for dear life. He almost sobbed and for the first time that night I felt strangely strong, like he was finally completely at our mercy… which he was. 

“Is he big inside you?” I teased. 

“So…,” Josh breathed out, but was unable to finish the sentence. That’s when Lucas chimed in for the first time. 

“So tight. He’s taking me so good. You’re… a good boy, huh?” 

Josh was still hard inside me and whimpered again at those words. “So be a good boy a little longer. Make her cum if you want my load,” Lucas continued – almost breathless – but his tone sounded strong… authoritative almost. He was also very close, I could tell. And so was I. To be honest, I could come just by listening to the two of them. 

Josh’s obedience prevented me from testing that theory, though. His hand grabbed my inner thigh and forced my leg up a bit, before he snaked it in between my legs and his fingertips brushed against my clit, almost fearfully this time. He started with slow, tentative circles, but soon quickened his pace when I moaned lewdly, making it known that he was doing a good job. 

Lucas’s thrusts became frantic at this point and he basically forced Josh to keep moving inside me. His knee that was still resting against mine started to tremble violently and he cried out from overstimulation. 

Suddenly, Josh’s breath hitched and I sensed rather than saw how Lucas wrapped his hand around Josh’s throat, as I could feel his arm between us. “You like this?” Lucas growled and Josh let out a high-pitched, strangled “yeah”, confirming my suspicion. I was getting high on his nasal ‘hnnnns’ and it took only a few more seconds until I came hard around him, squeezing him tight. 

It was too much for him, and he ejaculated again, howling like a wolf pup. He was literally writhing now. His arm twisted around me again, squeezing my rib cage. 

“Lucas!” I hissed warningly and looked behind me, but there was no need. He let out a low growl and let go of Josh’s throat, grabbing at his side instead in a frantic need to hold on to something. I was certain he was going to leave marks. He bottomed out one last time and his whole body shook while he filled Josh’s ass with his seed. 

Neither of us moved for a while. I felt Josh go limp inside me until he just slipped out. I heard him hiss slightly as Lucas pulled out too. “Are you ok, baby? I asked him tentatively and he rubbed his nose against the nape of my neck before he answered. 

“More than ok, Jo? I think I might not be able to walk tomorrow, but… yeah, it was worth it,” he chuckled. 

I felt something shift as the dawn broke. It felt right like that. I didn’t want it to be just one night. 

The truth about love is it's nasty and salty It's the regret in the morning, it's the smelling of armpits It's wings, and songs And trees, and birds It's all the poetry that you ever heard P!nk, The Truth About Love

@thewritingbeforesunrise @fleet-of-fiction @writingcold @lvnterninthenight @its-interesting-van-kleep  @takenbythemadness  @edgingthedarkness @myownparadise96 @gvfstuddedmajesty @jazzyfigz @sanguinebats @josh-iamyour-mama @Lyndz2names @wetkleenex-gvf @peaceloveunitygvf @cheersdannyx2 @fleetingjake @lizzys-sunflower @emojakekiszka @gvfmarge @Dayumclarizzel @lipstickitty @clownstarr @gretasfallingsky @musicislove3389 @i-love-gvf @psychedelectable @allof--mylove @sacredsparrow @scarabsinthestardust @Ironlotus90

[charlie-shmarlie]

Secret relationship: Walter 1 headcanons

What a secret relationship with Walter would hold ♡

A Cabin On The Lake ♪

Requested <3

Warnings: awkward & confused Walter, a little angst,

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Needless to say, being in a relationship with an android is nothing short of unheard of. To the average person, it's obscene. So naturally, you two would have to swear to secrecy. If anyone ever found out about your personal connections, you would be terminated, and Walter would be factory reset, or even deactivated.

Please remember to be patient with Walter. He doesn't understand his emotions nor how he seemed to gain the ability to have them. But he tries his best for you and is willing to learn all he can about even the most complex human emotions and feelings.

He would ideally like to express his affections for you, but isn't sure how. He's studied the basics of human physical affection but can't quite figure out how to practice them himself.

The best he can offer you at this point is longing stares, "accidental" touches, and quality time.

Speaking of quality time, he tends to spend more time around you than the rest of the crew. It's really the only way he knows how to confidently communicate that he wants to be around you.

Makes incredibly convincing excuses to the others as to why he "needs" to spend said time with you.

You and him definitely have special time set aside to just be in each other's company in private. These secret meetings usually involve both of you sitting next to each other in your quarters, you holding his hand, and him just admiring you in reverent silence.

Walter is extremely careful with every single interaction he has with you in public. He may not fully understand his feelings for you, but he *does* know that he can't risk losing you. The idea of never seeing you again or having you wiped from his memory is a thought that is oddly terrifying to him. He's never feared anything before. Never been attached to something enough to be afraid of losing it. But you? You're a completely different story.

He appreciates your willingness to be patient with him more than you could know. Your kindness is never taken for granted.

If he starts to get a better grasp on expressing his affections for you, then he may try something as simple as touching your face or your hair when he's sure you're both alone. It may not seem like much, but it's a big step for him.

Glances that linger for longer than necessary.

Assisting you with whatever you might need.

He can't help but want to share a future with you once the ship lands on Origae-6. Yes, he can easily picture himself by your side on the earth-like planet, perhaps, in your very own home...a small farm or a log cabin with a large fireplace to keep you warm during the long, chilly nights. He would take care of you throughout the entirety of your painfully short human life. You would fix him when his systems began to fail, and he would protect you when you grew old and frail and could no longer hold your own. He would learn how to properly express his affections for you and never need to face the consequences. He would have you for as long as he could. For as long as you would have him.

But of course, these are only dreams. Hopeful scenarios he conjures up in his wired mind to distract himself from the unfortunate reality that his future likely only holds separation from you and getting shipped off for a new mission with a new directive.

Those private times when you're holding his hand and speaking so softly to him, they calm that foreign sense of unease within him that builds up whenever he thinks about losing you. He doesn't understand how you do it. He doesn't understand his newfound emotions. And he doesn't understand how he's able to feel them. But, there is something he *believes..* Something he speculates:

He just might...love you.

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[xanasaurusrex]

Helloooo could u please do Poseidon cabin next? My hc is that they can be either very chill like typical calm surf kids and super relaxed (like calm and relaxing waves” or unhinged af like chaotic, super fun in a bit of crazy way and overall more energetic and like yeah unhinged (like Percy). Lil obvs usually overall the same calm, go-with-the-flow kind of kids but also either very chill or very chaotic. Wanna know what u think tho… so yeah. Poseidon cabin if u can please?

⇢ ˗ˏˋ poseidon cabin headcanons ࿐ྂ

hi!! of course i can do poseidon cabin hcs! i honestly have a lot of ideas about poseidon kids. thank you so much for the request and i hope you like these!

i totally agree with you that there are two ways a poseidon kid can turn out

1) totally chaotic (percy)

2) totally chill surfer kid

there are a few people who are a mix of chaotic and surfer, which makes them actually really fun to surf with, but only perodically, because while surfing with them is fun it can also be kinda scary at times

continuing on with water sports

poseidon kids are naturally really good at any and all watersports

they can often be found as the captains of swim teams

and very good at waterskiing and waterboarding

a go-to job for a poseidon kid is lifeguard as well, obviously

poseidon kids also don't eat seafood

some people find this confusing and some people find this obvious, i personally think it's obvious

it's because they can understand what fish are saying, so they don't like eating them

if you ask them why that bothers them, they'll say "you know what people are saying, would you eat them?"

not the most sound logic, but they're not exactly known for that

all poseidon kids have natural beach waves

poseidon himself definitely has beachy wavy hair, and he definitely passes that onto his kids

just like hecate and athena pass on their eye color to their kids, poseidon passes on his hair

poseidon kids are hardly ever seen wearing shoes unless it's absolutely necessary

they just naturally feel more comfortable barefoot

(the darks are a-barking)

(BARK BARK BARK)

ignore me

they love spending time at the beach, obviously

little beach creatures always manage to find their way to them

like you'll look away from a poseidon kid at the beach for about two seconds, and look back, and they have a little crab in their hand

sometimes they can look a little crazy, because they'll start having conversations with these little creatures

another thing about the beach with poseidon kids:

yknow the thing where whenever you leave the beach, you have sand just everywhere

they don't

it's something to be genuinely envious of when it comes to poseidon kids

like, they'll shake out their towel and there will be no sand on it, and then it's just done

it's definitely magic, a gift from their godly father

poseidon kids also hate aquariums

most aquariums don't treat the fish like they need to be treated, so going to an aquarium is kind of traumatic for a poseidon kid, because they can understand what the fish are saying

a kind of universal traumatic event for any poseidon kid is going to an aquarium on a field trip in elementary school (not yet aware that they're the child of poseidon) and hearing the fishes beg for help to be liberated from the prison they were being kept in

and when they got to the touch tank, hearing the fish beg to not be touched, things like that

like any and all poseidon kids ran around ripping everyone's hands out of the water, begging them to stop touching the fishes because they didn't like it

needless to say they got picked up early that day

poseidon kids also tan really easily

like, they'll fully walk past a sunny window and get tan

like for the full summer season, they're tan

they also stay tan for a really long time, so they're honestly still tan into like spooky season

poseidon kids are also very good at throwing parties

it's their chaotic side

they know where and how to get the best decorations, where the best spot to set everything up is

(and where to get good alcohol without getting caught, but you didn't hear that from me)

poseidon kids are the definition of horse people

not all horse people are children of poseidon but all children of poseidon are horse people

not in a cringy way, either, they just connect with horses more than any other animal, which makes sense because they can hear them and can have real relationships and conversations with them

they do often look a little bit crazy if they're seen at the stables fully having a conversation with horses

if they return to the stable where their horse is kept after spending all summer at camp, they'll go around catching up with all the other horses

they're also naturally skilled at riding horses

like if i jumped on a horse right now, i would fall off and die because i've never done it before and horse riding is a skill (according to the sims 4)

poseidon kids could go literally their whole life without riding a horse, and then jump on one during a quest and ride perfectly

the favorite movie genre of poseidon kids is also westerns, because they generally have horses in those movies, and they can understand their neighs

they think it's hilarious when a horse makes fun of the actor in the movie but no one but them can tell because they can understand what they're saying and no one else can

they look like crazy people watching westerns

at the camp movie nights, whenever it's poseidon cabin's turn to pick the movie, they pick a western, and are laughing at the most inappropriate times in the movie, because the horse just neighed in the background and he was making fun of the actor guys! the horse thinks this makes as much sense as we do, trust me, he has a really good sense of humor

going back to the aquarium thing a little bit, poseidon kids are also not a huge fan of zoos

this is because they can understand zebras, and zoo animals are also not treated the best

sometimes they're treated better than aquarium animals, but poseidon kids are always hesitant to go to the zoo, or just any place where you go and look at animals of any kind for fun

they can't help but think how they would feel if they were in that position

so basically poseidon kids have the hugest hearts ever

and they're very brave as well

and basically the coolest ever

you should probably be friends with a poseidon kid... if you're not already

alright that's all for poseidon kids! this was super fun, i had a bunch of ideas for poseidon kids! i want to thank everyone again, for all the support i'm getting on these. i've decided to start writing for harry potter characters, because i'm binging those movies and have a bunch of ideas, so these might be coming out a little bit slower, but know that i'm working on them! if you've requested one and i haven't posted it yet, just know that it's in the works. thanks so much for all the support and requests, i love you all so much!! muah!

[scekrex]

Hi! I hope you’re doing well!!!

I just read your Adam x Lucifer’s son fic and I loved it a lot more than I thought I would going in (that sounded really backhanded but I definitely don’t mean it that way 😭)

I was thinking of a part 2 that takes place literally just a few minutes after the 1st, Lucifer basically gave Adam a few… let’s say corrective love taps. And now the reader is patching up his now bruised face. Reader try’s to make Adam feel better by complimenting him and flirting with him. (I know damn well Adam is such a hoe for genuine affection like-)

Cut to Lucifer sitting across the room eyeing you both, now realizing that his son is in love with THE FIRST MAN and Adam is ALSO in love with his son. To put it simply, he is kinda freaking out. He now refuses to leave them alone together for the rest of the day, and also the unseeable future! He starts listing the reasons why the Reader should very much not being dating Adam. (Would be funny if he also mentioned the age gap as if he didn’t date a newly born woman as a who knows how old Angel LMAO) And Adam is like “Bitch, I’m am literally right the fuck here.”

Lucifer is just really activating his overprotective dad mode. That is… until Charlie really needs his help with something for the hotel. He eventually (albeit reluctantly) agrees to leave to help because he thinks “I’ll be quick, it’s just what? 5 minutes? And I’ll be in the room just a few doors down!”

He leaves and Adam, who for some motherfucking reason, can’t stop thinking about all the things Lucifer said to you about him and starts thinking ‘Maybe he’s right’ and starts just getting in his head about it

Reader finishes up patching his face and can tell he’s thinking about what Luci said. He reassures him that he loves no one else but Adam and that what his dad thinks is irrelevant. Reader gives Adam a kiss before asking. “Anyways, you ready to go?”

“The fuck you mean? Go where?

“I mean… how else are we going to finish what we started?”

And the was one of the first times the reader managed to make Adam flustered. Needless to say, Adam and the reader weren’t there when Lucifer returned. Much to Lucifer’s anger.

Nah man ur good, I wasn't the biggest fan at first too but y'know, it's kinda cute. Also u didn't specify anything about Reader and Adam having sex so I kept this SFW, my inbox is temporarily closed but if ya want a sequel that's basically just smut, lemme know once my inbox is open again!

Part 1

My lover's the sunlight to keep the Goddess on my side

pairing: Adam x male!reader

warnings: language

note: not beta read bc fuck you

“Was that really necessary, dad?” you grumbled as you pressed a ball of cotton against Adam’s lip - Adam’s bleeding lip. Lucifer hadn't been too fond of the view he had been greeted with when entering the room. The brunette’s bottom lip was split open, his nose was bleeding and his eye was slowly turning black again. Adam had just recovered from the stabbing injuries Niffty had caused and now he was covered in bleeding wounds once again. A thing that surely did surprise you and that you wanted to look deeper into once the situation was less tense, was the fact that Adam’s blood was still golden. His blood had remained pure and angelic and while you partly understood why, it did make you curious.

Adam hissed in pain as your fingers gently traced along his nose, checking if it was just bleeding or if it was broken - Adam was lucky because your father had actually managed to break the former angel’s nose.

Lucifer was sitting on an armchair across the room, watching the gentle touches his son offered Adam, he didn’t like that they got along and he hated that they seemed so in love, so all over each other. Lucifer knew Adam, well that wasn’t entirely true. Lucifer had known Adam once, back in Eden when everything had been so new and exciting for pretty much everybody. Back then Adam had been a kind and loving soul, but that soul was no longer comparable to the man that was sitting on his son’s bed, bleeding divine blood onto the covers while his son basically sat in Adam’s lap and took care of the injuries.

“Yes, it was necessary, someone needed to teach him a lesson,” Lucifer answered your question, sounding quite bitter. And partly you were able to understand your father, he had history with Adam - history that did not end well at all but the man whose lap you were sitting on seemed almost innocent. You were very aware that Adam was the last person to describe as innocent and sweet though.

“My poor angel,” you hummed as you leaned in a little closer, carefully stopping the bleeding of Adam’s nose before inspecting the broken bone a little closer - it was nothing you couldn’t fix, that was for sure. It would heal just fine, it just needed time. With gentle hands you cupped Adam’s face and kissed his stubbled chin, causing the brunette to shiver lightly. Adam was not used to gentle touches, yes, he had been spending quite some time with you ever since his people had left him behind, but that didn’t mean he got used to affectionate touches like those you offered him - that didn’t mean he disliked them, quite the opposite was the case, he lived for your gentle touches and soft words. You somehow always found something to praise the brunette for.

Adam hummed in agreement, nodding his head lightly to underline the sound. “Don’t you worry, I’ll fix you up in no time,” you added, satisfied that there was no more blood dripping from Adam’s nose.

Lucifer growled from where he was sitting, not pleased with how close you were to Adam’s face - well, actually he wasn’t pleased that you were close to Adam at all. You shot your father a glare over the brunette’s shoulder. “You’re responsible for his injuries so shut up,” you hissed at the blonde king.

The king of Hell simply rolled his eyes at your words, “Yeah, well you shouldn’t be dating Adam - date whoever you want, I don’t care if they’re female, non-binary or male, just don’t date him.” Lucifer pointed towards Adam who seemed not very happy about how lowly Lucifer spoke about him. Sure, they had their issues with each other, but why was it such a big deal to the blonde that the first man and the prince of Hell had a thing for each other?

“Y’know, first of all he’s a maniac, he literally used to kill our people,” Lucifer started to list reasons why you should stay away from the brunette, you could only raise an eyebrow at your father, “Oh our people? The people you ignored for only God knows how long? Those people you’re supposed to rule but instead of doing so you simply let them rot?” You felt how the first man’s hands came to rest on your hips, gently patting them signaling you that he liked your answer. Lucifer huffed.

“Okay what about the fact that he’s manipulative and controlling?” The blonde king tried again, nodding his head towards Adam. “Dad,” you said, looking at Lucifer, you seemed quite unimpressed by his words, “Mom’s book is trash, Adam was told to keep Lilith on a leash, he was supposed to look out for her and stop her from being absolutely self destructive and reckless.”

The blonde king tried it yet again, his problem was not that Adam was a man, his problem was that Adam was Adam, “Okay but what about the age gap? He’s like so much older than you are, sweety,” you cringed at the nickname your father gave you and playfully slapped Adam’s chest as you felt a chuckle vibrating through his body. “Says the guy who fucked the first woman a couple days after her fucking creation,” Adam huffed, turning his head around to face Lucifer.

The short king was about to argue yet again, but Charlie interrupted him by opening the door without knocking, something that was very unlike her since she valued privacy. Your sister’s eyes watched you and Adam for a moment, she shot you a quick, reassuring smile before heading towards your father, who was still sitting in that stupid armchair, observing you and Adam like the both of you were little children.

“I’m sorry for bursting in without knocking,” Charlie apoligzed, sounding quite stressed about whatever was going on elsewhere in the hotel, it wasn’t that you cared all that much. Not when you were seated in Adam’s lap and Charlie was a great distraction for Lucifer’s sharp eyes. “Don’t sweat it, dollface,” Adam simply responded, shrugging his shoulders as he spoke, “You’re not the fucking first, seems to be a fucking family issue you have there.” Your sister spun around in confusion, frowning at the first man who simply rested his chin on your head and grinned at her. “Uh… yeah… no, what I came here for is actually,” the blonde girl turned back towards the king of Hell, “Dad, I really need your help.”

Lucifer shook his head, nodding towards you and Adam, “I can't leave them alone sweety.” Charlie glanced over at how you were seated in Adam's lap, patching up the wounds your father had caused. The blonde girl sighed, then returned her attention to Lucifer who was still watching you and the brunette very closely. “It's urgent, Valentino-” at the name of the pimp Lucifer perked up, he knew Valentino meant no good and the fact that Charlie was mentioning him in context with the fact that she needed his help with something only made it worse in his eyes. “I think I can spare a few minutes to deal with Valentino,” Lucifer grumbled, not exactly happy leaving you with Adam, yet he knew his daughter wouldn't ask if it wasn't important.

He got up from the armchair, twirled his cane and tapped it on the floor once it was right side up again. “Let's make this quick.”

You watched as your father and your sister left the room to deal with said Valentino problem. As soon as the door fell shut you stopped hiding the grin and looked up at Adam, who seemed to be thinking about something - most likely all the harsh words your father had said. A small sigh left you as you cupped Adam's face once again, looking deeply into struggling golden eyes. “Don't take his words to heart he's… a little overprotective when it comes to his youngest son,” you hummed at Adam, the grin on your lips turned into a soft smile as you caressed Adam's cheek with your thumb. ��Besides, we have to get going before he comes back.”

The brunette frowned at your words, his concern about all the things Lucifer had said was replaced by confusion, “Get going? Where the fuck do you wanna go?” You glanced to the door, then back at Adam. The first man followed your eyes and the confusion cleared up rather quickly. “Somewhere where we can continue what we started without dad interrupting us.”

-

When Lucifer returned to your room only five minutes later the room was empty. Nothing had changed except for the fact that Adam was no longer sitting on your bed with you in his lap. Lucifer cursed under his breath and just as he was about to go seek for you and the first man, he heard moans coming from one of the other rooms, those soft sounds of pleasure caused the devil to stop in his tracks immediately.

The moans echoing through the hotel came from Adam.

[amvro]

pairing: amuro tooru x gn!reader

summary: he’s overworked and he needs some well deserved rest.

cw: none :)

It was as if he could do anything. He could start his day at the cafe and save a few people before coming that night, and because of this, it was terribly easy to forget that he too, is human like everyone else.

He was a little too good at pushing himself when he needed to most. When he needed some rest, but a call comes in asking for some extra help on a mission. Or the cafe suddenly asking him to open up the next morning because someone's unable to make their shift. He was always able to say yes and exceed everyone's expectations no matter the job.

For this exact reason, he was often given far more work than your average person, and this is not to mention he had three different faces he was juggling. Yet, even through all this work, it looked effortless to him. He never seemed to be struggling and he was always on task, so no one would suspect he actually was tired and a little rest was necessary for this hardworking man.

However, you would never miss it. Not the small eyebags that appeared just below his eyes and definitely not the sighs that he would let out every once in a while. He needed some rest, but you knew better than anyone that he wouldn't listen if you simply told him to, he would just push himself a little more. He's a little too good at that.

You knew when his next day off was, but you also knew he was planning to get all his household chores done and caught up with that day, and you weren't going to let that happen. He needed to rest. So there you were, two days before his day off, cleaning around to surprise him. You were absolutely ready to take the whole day and the next if you had to, but it was much better than you had expected. Of course, he still had most of his daily chores covered through all his work. Needless to say, you were excited about his day off.

Before long, his day off had finally come. He woke up bright and early like he always did, went out for a little jog, and did his little routine. He had gotten back home and he was ready to take out the garbage when he realized it was already done, which he found terribly skeptical. He then went to check the laundry which was also already done, not to mention everything seemed a lot cleaner than he had left it. Immediately, his eyes widened and he knew it was you, and he was ashamed he hadn't noticed earlier.

As if on cue, you rang the doorbell and he opened it up. You looked at his running wear and you realized he had already gone and ran.

"You're already done! Aw, that's too bad... I was going to tell you to sleep in some more first," you said and gave him a little kiss as you walked in.

"Thank you so much," he said, a little lost for words and you smiled.

"Oh, don't mention it. Go take a shower, I'll borrow your kitchen by the way," you said, pushing him towards his bathroom.

"I'm sorry, you just came but I think I will," he said, looking apologetic and you told him there was nothing for him to feel sorry for.

While he was in the shower, you decided to make a few mug cakes. Very simple 5-minute ones, because his showers were too short for anything special. Now, they took much longer than the five minutes they were advertised to take, but it was still done by the time he had gotten out of the shower.

You were sitting on the couch with a blanket and the mug cakes on the coffee table when he walked out of the shower. You had been dating for a while now, but gosh was he still so stunning with his wet hair.

"Come sit and eat while it's still warm!" you said. "I'll dry your hair."

"No, it's okay, you should relax," he said and you immediately looked at him, shocked.

"If anyone needs to relax it's you," you said and forced him to sit down so you could dry his hair, which he had no choice but to give into.

It was a lovely time, there were hardly any words said as the sound of the dryer was a little too loud, but it was comforting. He was eating your very quickly put-together mug cake while you were drying his silky hair. Every other bite he would feed you some as you were busy drying his hair, and you couldn't ask for more. Nothing could make you happier and the same went for him.

Once your mug cakes were finished and his hair was dry, you snuggled into his bed and pulled him in.

"We're going to sleep," you said, already comfortable under his blanket.

"No, we really don't have to. We finally have a day off together, we should go somewhere you want to," he said.

"Well, I want to be here right now. With you," you said, completely certain that that was what you wished for. "I really want some more sleep today and I can't sleep without you so you're going to have to tag along."

He couldn't help but smile. He slowly snuck in and you snuggled up right next to him as he kissed the top of your head. It was sweet, and that was it. It didn't have to be anything more and it was all he wanted for the past few weeks. He truly didn't know how you managed to notice and he couldn't imagine himself with anyone other than you. You had to be the one.

"Thank you so much," he said, again. "For noticing."

"Noticing what?" you said with a smile, playing dumb. "I just wanted some extra sleep with you. I hope you don't mind on your first day off in a while."

"There is nothing more I could possibly ask for," he said and wrapped his arms around you. Before long, he was fast asleep and you couldn't help but smile. You knew he was tired and you didn't know how to get him to rest.

You kissed him softly and whispered, "I am always here for you," before falling asleep as well, but you would never find out that he was awake to hear those words. Nor will you ever find out that he fell even more in love with you that day.

[momojedi]

Imagine: You're Count Dooku’s apprentice and Uncle General Grievous has to watch over you

Type: Headcanons; GN! Reader (platonic) Character(s): General Grievous, Count Dooku (mentioned) Notes: I love Grievous so much and since in my opinion, he doesn't get enough love as a character, I decided to write something for him ! The reader is referenced to be younger than any of Dooku's usual apprentices but whether they're a child or not is really up to you.

Let’s be clear: Grievous is not a good babysitter. In fact, he’s so bad at it that, instead of watching over you, he will send a batch of battle droids to take care of you.

The second he sees you after Count Dooku approached him, he’s already mentally retreating. Grievous is a general, a separatist myth that leaves Jedi alike fearing him, someone who’s destroyed the lives of legends. In what world would someone like him waste his time babysitting some lousy Sith padawan?

Needless to say he’ll be biting back the urge to insult and offend his superior for merely suggesting this kind of job and accepted it, leaving you to trail behind him as you and your master go separate ways.

But don’t get any ideas! Just because Grievous sweetly nods and agrees to anything Dooku says, doesn’t mean he’ll treat you with the same respect. You are below him, a mere apprentice. You are at the absolute bottom of the food chain in his eyes and that's exactly how he’ll treat you.

Well, he will at first.

The first few weeks, he won’t give a flying kriff about you. Instead, he'll send some battle droids your way to keep you occupied while he takes care of his war duties, such as bitching and moaning about General Kenobi.

It is only when he sees you fight for the first time that he's a bit taken back. You're by far one of, if not the, youngest apprentice he's ever seen trailing behind Dooku. Naturally, he was already mocking you internally, after all you were nothing but a meek, feeble leech in his very eyes.

Or that's what he expected, at least.

But when he sees you standing your ground when you engage with some troopers as things once again get a bit heated with the GAR, he has to admit he's quite impressed. He intently watches you, your timed moves and has to admit to himself; you do know what you're doing.

So, once the fight is over, he decides to keep you around until further notice, taking in the position of second-in-command until Dooku calls you back.

However, despite your new role, he's still distant and his usual grouchy self. He doesn't talk to you unless it's a briefing or necessary information for an upcoming battle/mission. Still, he starts to notice that he can't help but enjoy your presence.

He starts to care about you, your health, your well-being even.

You got injured on your last mission? Grievous is going to tear apart whoever is responsible for that.

You are stranded on some inhabited planet? Not to worry, Grievous will personally locate and gather you this instant.

Some pirates kidnapped you to get a ransom out of the separatists? Hondo. Grievous will set aside all his duties, track down where they're hiding you and blow that place into pieces once he's made sure you're safe and sound.

Once your time on his ship has come to an end and you're off to learning at your master's sides again, he's definitely going to miss having you around though he'd never admit that.

"Looks like the general's missing someo-" That battle droid was turned into scraps before it could even think of finishing that sentence.

With the Seperatists' leaders having somewhat developed a soft spot for you in general, even Dooku can't help but notice your slight sorrow as you're taken away from Grievous' base.

And so, whenever there's a chance for you to see your favourite General again, he won't think twice about taking you along so you have a chance of seeing him again.

And despite his cold and wicked exterior, there's still a glint of joy in his eyes when he catches sight of you.

[goddess-mixmi]

Prompt: love and deepspace men when black MC takes care of her hair

Recently started playing love and deepspace after basically avoiding it for a while until I have it a chance and now I’m hooked lol. My interpretation might not be the best for Rafayel but I did my best 😭.

Caleb

Given that you and him are childhood friends and raised under the same roof he knows your hair routine by heart. He use to wait on you and grandma to finish doing your hair so he often sat and watched this routine. He would gather the sweet scented shampoo and conditioner that he would joke you never grew out of and help you wash your hair. Gathering all the necessary materials for the drying and styling process too. He’d help with the blow drying and ask if he could style your hair too which you decline his offer to because you’re worried he would mess up your hair intentionally. Instead he would hand you the brush, comb, hair oil or what ever when you ask for it and would massage your shoulders when your arms start getting tired. He will also make sure your favorite bonnet and head scarf is clean and ready for you.

Zayne

Much like Caleb, Zayne has seen you do your hair care process before given how long you’ve known each other. He already knows you can handle it yourself but still aids you by gathering the materials you need but he can’t help but ask if you need help. You let him know you got it but you can see based on his movements he wants to help so you had him to help dry your hair with a towel and hand you the other essentials. You even ask him what style you should do in your hair, he would suggest a protective style that is easy to manage for you. Zayne prioritizes your thoughts first and knows not to suggest an elaborate style that could take long for you to do and or be painful for you to sleep with. He’s heard you complain the last time you got box braids and how foolish it was for you to get such a nerve pulling hair style just so you didn’t have to style your hair every day. But nothing could beat his surprise the day you wore a wig and took it off to let you scalp breathe when on a video call.

Xavier

You invited Xavier over once just to hang out but forgot that your hair takes a while, he stayed anyways and just watched from afar. He by no means knows how to do other peoples hair but watched as you did yours, he was definitely confused by the fact you did your hair in the skin but never questioned your methods. He was nodding off while waiting for you up until he heard the blow dryer going and work him right up. He watched as your hair went from damp to fluffy in seconds. Once fully dried you decided you can style your hair later and went to chat with him, he was so focused on your hair that he forgot that you two were talking. He said how much your hair reminded him of a cloud and asked to touch it, ofc you declined since you just washed it so he understood and complimented you about it. You got a notification from your fav YouTube channel and pulled it up on your phone for the two of you to watch, while leaning in closer to watch he caught a wiff of your wonderful scented shampoo and by the time that YouTube video finished he was fast asleep.

Rafayel

He doesn’t know about your wash day until you had to cancel on him that day. He showed up to your place and knocked on your door until you answered with a towel wrapped around your head and a unamused look on your face. He makes his way in after a sass filled greeting and you explained to him that today was the only day you had off to do your hair and he was surprised you needed a whole day just to do your hair. He merely watched as you continued to towel dry your hair. Needless to say you received a painting of you basking in your natural beauty and gorgeous natural hair.

Sylus

Despite being my fav his ass dunno shit about taking care of your hair, well in the beginning at least but he does send out the twins to get your favorite hair essentials while being in his humble home. Well you complained about needing to wash your hair after all that time trying to align with him. Surprisingly he got the right shampoo and conditioner you loved so much . For the most part he had Mephisto watch the entire process and from there studied how you did your hair routine until the next time you did your hair he helped during the process even though you told him you can do it yourself. He did back off but he kinda hovered over you during the process until you got annoyed with trying to part your hair. So he offered a helping hand, while helping he said how soft and beautiful your hair was and that you should definitely wear it this way often. He of course knew you wore a wig the first time you met and saw no problems with that either but it was something reminiscent of seeing you wearing your natural hair. Oh yea and he’d also pay for you to get your hair done if you asked him. He knows how much you love to have your hair done so he will gladly spend money to ensure your satisfaction. He would also answer your question about what hairstyle you should get done because he knows his kitten would look beautiful no matter how her hair looks.

[ghostflowerhotpotch]

Has it ever occurred to you that since Gwen hasn’t had a mother figure for the majority of her life and from the beginning of ATSV its kinda shown she’s been craving that type of guidance or even affection when she sees Jess for the first time, do you think that once the dust is settled between her and Miles and she finally gets to properly introduce herself to his parents, do you think that Rio can not replace Gwen’s mother but atleast fill in that gap in some way where she’s able to get some of the guidance she’s been looking for. Idk I just feel like the dynamic between the two could be interesting once they both get along with each other, hopefully this makes sense to answer.

Ohh this is interesting.

Now, hope you don't mind, but Gwen and Jess situation is something I wanted to talk about for a while, so, I will use your comment to talk about this.

I will do the Rio part too, but knowing myself, there is a chance that would end in a second post because I talk too much.

Let's go!

Now, do I think is this a joke? Yes, but I also think Gwen means it.

And look, this is not to say that you necessarily need to have two parents to raise a kid, I personally believe that one parent, if they provide the necessary attention and care to the child or children, could be an amazing parent and not let their kids feel like they are missing anything.

However, as discussed on this post, I mentioned why while George isn't a bad dad, sadly he is not the best parent for Gwen.

And here I also discussed why Gwen's mental health is a bit of a mess.

But to not sent people to do homework, let's give the cliff-notes version.

George is trying to be a good father, however between his job and his refusal to understand nuance, he has accidentally pushed Gwen away; even if maybe this could have been resolved if she talked to him in a normal situation, the fact that he did what he did in the beginning shows she was scared for a reason.

So that means Gwen has a gaping hole in what a role model and parent should be, since she needs more support. Of couse her Spidey identity is important to her (in fact she leans too much into it,) and having no one to help her on that complicated path doesn't make the situation any easier.

Enters Jessica Drew.

You know I found extremely telling that when Gwen sees Miguel, she is cracking jokes and not really taking his professionalism crap seriously; yet when Jess comes kicking ass with her motorcycle and she looks at her like she has seen the light.

Perhaps it had to do with her realizing this failed artist is more problematic than she expected, or the fact that Miguel was quickly disposed of by something she saw from a mile away; while Jess came putting the bad guy on a grinder and maneuvering a bike like nobody's business. Needless to say, Gwen is DEFINITELY impressed.

Once again, this plays almost like this is a dream come true for Gwen.

She hides it well for most of the movie as well as the previous one, but the reality is that underneath that cool exterior, this is a teenage mess with so much angst she is giving my teen self a run for their money.

Just like she craves companionship in the form of Miles as well as other spiders, she probably wants someone who can tell her everything is going to be okay or what they should do. Again, we may forget sometimes, especially with superhero movies where protagonists need to be competent despite their age most of the time; but Gwen is 16, 17 at the most; and has been handling this stress and turmoil for at least 3 years. That's a lot.

Top it with her dad not being able to emotionally support her, and the fact that she wants a mom becomes less a possible commentary about not nuclear families, and more of a likely possibility because the first 20 minutes of the movie gave us LOTS of material to show how mess up this is.

I think is a testament to the situation that she doesn't default to Peter B or Noir in the first movie, nor Miguel; she only seems to be interested in learning from someone when she sees Jess.

Is funny, but is also very painful to hear for me, as if you ask me she said it completely straight, and this just shows how much help she needs.

Granted Gwen said that accidentally and probably wouldn't have said it if thought about it first, but the fact that it slipped says a lot.

She desperately wants someone like Jess in her life, and to top it off, she probably wants that person as a maternal figure; probably someone to ask about techniques for defeating baddies and also who could talk about feelings without this person defaulting to work as a copy mechanism.

Feel free to call me crazy for getting so work up about a joke, but if I am honest other interactions really make me sell this idea for me.

Now let's talk Jess.

Literally what other reaction she was going to have.

We really never hear a definitive answer to the question, but I also think Jess didn't think too hard about it for a reason.

I am planning to go through some scenes of Gwen and Jess to dig deeper into their mentor/not-mom situation, but let's start with this.

Do I think Jess should have adopted Gwen? No, not at all.

Look I am a sucker for found family and adoption tropes, and I would had love nothing more than for Jess to give one dirty look at Gwen's dad, tell her she would be there for her, and take her away to a good home. That is not what happened, and I don't blame her.

She is on her way to having her own kid, she needs to be spider-woman and to top it all off, she seems to be kind of a second in command in a really big operation, where your boss is your friend who is also way too into his job and she probably is still there partially to make sure Miguel doesn't completely lose it. She has a lot on her plate as it is, adopting a traumatized teenager is a lot of work that shouldn't really be her job.

Do I think that means she has no responsibilities to Gwen? No, not really.

And this is largely why.

Okay, I will try to not go over every moment with them, as this is more about explaining their situation than a deep dive of every instance of their relationship, but this is a good kicker for the situation.

Jess immediately takes an interest in Gwen for the organization, now while I can understand that she based this purely on her abilities, I think a part of it was the comment Gwen made earlier. I think she sees in her someone who needs a steady hand and some support.

As a mentor.

This is going a bit ahead on the post, but let's establish that 1) This exists, and 2) Jessica got that idea EXTREMELY quick all things considered.

Here is where the responsibility part actually kicks in.

No, Jess doesn't have any responsibility to Mother Gwen in any way, regardless if Gwen needs one or not (she does,) but the moment she not only started to argue for her to have a spot in the organization, to take her in when the things in her universe technically imploded (which they are marginally responsible considering they came to clean this means and they only did it thanks to Gwen,) She implicitly accepted to look after her.

Okay here is where we need to talk a bit about tropes.

When you have protagonists that are teens or kids with powers, is inevitable that they will need to deal with dangerous stuff that no sane adult would let a real kid do, but is fiction so you kind of have to suck it.

This is a trope that I found kind of lazy even when I was part of the age demographic; which is why stuff like The Owl House with Eda was refreshing.

She was also a Mentor who was also not very responsible as a guardian, but she ended up growing into one, and even if she failed to protect her apprentice, she did try her damnest to do it.

Jess is not Eda, and she doesn't need to be, except that this story has proven to be aware that they are still teens.

Jess clearly recognizes this isn't fair for Gwen. We also see something like this in the first movie, with Peter B worried about Miles can or can't handle, while still letting them do stuff you wouldn't catch me letting my little sister get away with; they know that there are somethings someone at that age shouldn't just be handling on their own.

And Jess isn't exactly ice-cold about Gwen.

Jess took interest in Gwen's potential quickly, she looked after her, and quickly went to try to calm her down and support her during a very high tense and stressful moment. Even here is Gwen the one who ultimately moves away, not Jess, proving she could had try to stay close to ensure she was okay.

And this is something that shows that it kind of sticks.

While considerably harsher here than in her introduction scene, Jess is showing that despite her annoyance with Gwen, she still likes her. She never thought her relationship with Miles shouldn't be a reason not to have her on the team; she trusted a mission in the universe despite that, and also calls Gwen her star pupil, which I don't was sarcasm.

She also gives her an hour to fix this, which even if not much, is more than she could have given her.

I am not saying that Jess didn't look after Gwen, or didn't care about her beyond what she could do for the organization, however, it wasn't what Gwen needed.

Let's circle back to responsibility,

Jess is aware of what happened with her dad, she knows what Gwen lost, and she can probably imagine that a kid that lost her identity and her world like that on just one night can't be doing okay; yet nothing shows me she ever did anything about it.

Here is the thing, Jess doesn't need to be Gwen's mom, but she can't just insist to have her and be her mentor, and don't think about checking on her in something other than her kicking-ass abilities. Even if she doesn't want to deal with it, she should have either seen how to make her father see reason, or lock her in the room with the spider-man psych.

Considering how things go in this movie, neither thing happens.

And it feels more painfully obvious when you see how much Gwen tries to appeal to her emotionally.

In a vaccum, none of these are a big deal, but the more I think about it the more heartbreaking this is for me to watch.

This is why I find these to be such a big deal: Gwen doesn't like to do emotional shit.

I know, I probably repeated that more times than I can count; but let that sink in contrast to what's going on.

After Peter died, she decided to not have any friends because she couldn't deal with the grief, with Miles only getting past that rule because they are both spiders plus chemistry. And even then, when you see Miles asking if she is going to talk to her dad, she decided to crack a joke and brush the idea as swiftly as possible.

When her dad tells her about the break in the spider-woman case, she tries to brush it off with false enthusiasm at first, and then when she gives a more honest response is more out of bubbling annoyance that truly her trusting him with something.

She isn't baring her heart open in these moments though, let's not have it twisted; however, she is trying to use emotion as a way to appeal to Jess, which is not her first move with most people in general. Even when she is not actively giving her an in-depth explanation, in each of those moments she is giving the emotional context as to why this is so hard.

"You never got too close to someone?" -> "This person is important to me and this is hard for me, wasn't it for you?"

"But my gut says-" -> "I know this looks bad, and I can't explain how, but this isn't right, trust me."

"Tell him he is wrong!" -> I don't really need to explain this one, do it?

She continuously looks up to Jess to hear her out, and to understand what she is going through; she sees her and expects someone who can connect with her on that level and care about it.

But that's not what Jess does, because she is not her mom, she is her mentor.

For the most part, when Gwen tries to appeal to Jess emotionally speaking, Jessica shuts that idea down fast.

Now, I am going to preface this by clarifying that in real life, a mentor would probably check emotionally on the kid they are mentoring if only for the fact that when you are in charge of a kid, you should look after them. Fiction however is another ballpark, and technically speaking, a mentor shouldn't need to be doing something that is the job of the family.

A good mentor would probably understand their apprentice position and listen, since regardless of your years of experience, you can't just underestimate people or you will inevitably be surpassed. However, Jess isn't trying to be anything like that; she wants to teach Gwen her way, and her way says that emotions are kind of on the way. So regardless if it isn't what Gwen needs, she will insist on that.

I think there can be a way to accept emotions but also don't let them cloud your decisions, yet again, Jess is not interested in that, and I Gwen actually have normal, supportive parents (or even just one,) I wouldn't be so hung up about this. But she doesn't and Jess knows this.

Superhero or not, Gwen is just a teen, and shouldn't need to be living this, especially because I freaking doubt this is a canon event or something; with the resources they have, and the people they have on board, I can't believe there isn't a way they could have talk to Captain Stacy and made him see reason.

But they didn't, because they are more worried about spider-man duties than whatever is going on to the person under the mask, and for them, this is just what comes with the territory so you have the suck it up. Even if this is perfectly avoidable once you think of it.

That's something that I had been thinking about a lot while doing my post on the organization as well as the one with Gwen falling in Mumbatthan. The spiders are stronger together, and in general working as a team gives them not only better chances at saving people, but also helping with the stress they have and being there for each other. That isn't the goal of the organization though.

Miguel's mission is to preserve the canon and to put people from other dimensions back into their respective ones, anything else is probably secondary to him. Sure, if someone asks for help from another Spider I don't think he would stand in the way; except if it is a canon event, which in that case, he will probably say to people to suck it up.

The pain they have, the trauma they are suffering, while being together helps it was never the end goal to help with that, and there is no regard in avoiding said pain. This is a job first and foremost, which is the attitude Jess has.

Gwen is not her kid, or even a young student, she is a coworker; one that she needs to guide a bit, but her subordinate at the end of the day.

Sometimes the waters get muddier, on both sides if I am honest.

I will touch a bit on other scenes, but I wanted to bring up this one in particular because there is something that feels a bit more mother-daughter than it probably has any right to show.

Now I will be the first to admit this may be a me thing, I can be very formal in real life and that goes double with people who are older than me and in a position of power over me, the only exception to that rule is my current boss because he is the mythical creature of being a manager who remembers employees are people too.

Gwen is not like that, she jokes and doesn't give too much of a shit regardless if you are Miguel or a bad guy. However there is something in the way Gwen acts that feels she wouldn't be phrasing stuff like this if it was Miguel on the other side; again, back to her using emotion as a first resource rather than as a lashing effect of her anger.

Jess, while being kind of no-nonsense overall, is also not the most formal, because this is the spider society and Miguel had the bad luck to be the only straight-laced one while everybody else tries to be a comedian for the most part. But there is a way that she talks to Gwen that for me feels kind of like her not fully keeping this professional either.

I can't fully put it into words, so feel free to not make seriously on this one, but there is something about the way Jess is commenting on the situation that reminds me more of a mom than any of my bosses.

Then we have scenes like this.

I am sorry but this part really first like is a discussion between mother and daughter, even with contexts the way the scene delivers gives that energy.

This isn't exactly wrong by itself, nor is it truly that surprising. The boss I mentioned before had also mentioned off-topic that me and my other coworker (who is a couple of years older than me,) are almost like his kids, and we share an age range. However he doesn't try to parent us really, and even if some of the comments are very much 'now listen to me kids' he quickly remembers we are adults and would drop topics or decisions we made that I know wouldn't be his reaction has been one of the kids that are actually kids.

It probably has more to do with the way they talk and see people younger than them that any parental feelings, and none of this is really inappropriate.

Nonetheless, the fact that Gwen craves that motherly bond makes these interactions hurt all the more for me.

Gwen may not be under the illusion that Jess is her mom, but she's subconsciously looking up to her, and the fact that Jess acts like this, even if by accident, just feels into that mentality. The mentality Gwen has that maybe Jess will listen this time, that she will take into account her feelings and her opinion in her decisions; but she continues to not do that.

For the most part.

Is a bit hard to see with the resolution I have, but when Gwen is kicking and screaming while been taken by the machine, Jess's gaze goes in another direction.

I am sorry if this is feeling repetitive, I know this post is a long one (which is funny how this post created another 2 just so those topics wouldn't be here.)

What I am trying to say with all of this, is despite Jess' insistence this is just work, that Gwen is just her pupil and she can only do so much; Jess continues to have a soft stop for Gwen that let's her get away with things. Is kind of ironic how Miguel said Gwen was a liability for her feelings for Miles, yet couldn't even consider how feelings in general would get in the way, considering Jess assigned this mission to Gwen (which then she fumbled the bag and led to the Spot becoming an actual menace,) give her a second chance, and then apparently let her go.

(It is possible she is looking for where Gwen is going to tell Miguel, but I doubt it.)

I fully believe that by the third film, Jess will probably end up either switching sides or just letting Gwen do what she wants, and even if is the first scenario I think it would be via Gwen that happens.

But to wrap things up, if Captain Stacy is not enough as a parent for Gwen because he can't do that role properly, Jess isn't good enough as a parent for Gwen because she doesn't want that role, regardless of if she sometimes kind of acts like it.

I think their relationship is fascinating, and I would love to explore more of this connection in some way; if only because the complicated nature of it makes it all the more interesting for me, but in a nutshell, is this:

Jess: I wanted an apprentice, you wanted a mom. Gwen: Well I guess we are both disappointed.

(Sorry I couldn't help myself, OOF I wish I could draw well enough for this.)

Now, with my thoughts on Rio, I could probably put them on this post because is not that long, but it will probably feel off with all this commentary I had been making, so it would be in another one.

If you got this far, congrats on your patience, and thank you for reading!

[cal-daisies-and-briars]

Finally we’ve got the new beginnings! Just met and just married! So much potential ahead of them!

⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️ (they be honeymooning! Bring on that newlywed bliss! I mean they’re basically always like that for each other but now they’ve got an excuse and by god are they gonna use it!)

📖📖📖📖📖📖📖📖📖📖📖📖📖📖📖📖📖 (buck so would be a librarian in another live. Him being all nerdy and helpful and amazing with kids - especially christopher - watch out eddie! You’re gonna fall in love before you know it!)

I’m obsessed with your work and eternally grateful that you share it - but you already knew this :p hope you have fun writing these!

- PCA <3

Oh love this theme!!!!! You are so kind, PCA. I always look forward to your asks.

63 for ⚡️ (Yesssss more honeymoon phase!)

---

Eddie finishes saying goodbye to Adriana and Ravi, says a final goodbye to Christopher, and then puts Buck out of his misery at last by joining him in the truck. 

“We are four minutes behind schedule,” Buck chides as Eddie buckles his seatbelt. 

“Tragic,” Eddie smirks. 

“It will be when we don’t stop for coffee,” Buck warns.

Starting off their honeymoon with a very serious threat. Interesting tactic. Height of romance, really.

“Buck,” Eddie complains. “It’s only an hour and twenty minutes of driving. Surely we can spare a coffee run.”

Buck smirks. “Fine. But I’ll find a way to get my four minutes back at some point.”

Oh, Eddie is sure. He knows who he married.

“Just don’t take it out on the coffee.”

🗲🗲🗲

The rental in San Clemente is literally perfect. 

They’d discussed going further away. Mexico, maybe. But between the wedding, the house, and planning for another kid, they decided not to spend more than necessary. Plus, they already live in one of the most beautiful places in the world. They didn’t need to go very far. 

The moment they walk into the little condo, Buck knows they made the right choice. It’s a tidy one bedroom with a full kitchen, a king sized bed, a big shower, a private ocean-view balcony, and a walk down to the beach. 

“This is incredible,” Eddie grins, walking out onto the balcony. 

“We are going to enjoy this balcony,” Buck agrees. 

Eddie shoots him a look. “Buck…”

“Honeymoon rules apply here, Eddie,” Buck tells him.

“Honeymoon rules?” Eddie asks skeptically. “What are those?”

“Making them up as I go along,” Buck informs him.

Eddie rolls his eyes, but he’s smiling. 

Yeah. They’re definitely going to enjoy the balcony. 

☆☆☆

Neither of them has had a honeymoon before. Neither of them is particularly accustomed to vacations, either. Though, perhaps Buck has some of the old Peruvian resort lifestyle living in him somewhere. Needless to say, it takes them both a minute to figure out what to do with literally nothing they need to do. Buck unpacks the groceries. Eddie searches the cupboards for glassware and pours them wine in nice, big blue-tinted glasses. They manage to relax on the balcony for, like, an hour, before they both get a bit twitchy.

“We aren’t sit and stare at the sea people, are we?” Eddie asks.  

“No, I don’t think we are.” Buck agrees. 

“What do honeymoon rules say about swimming while slightly intoxicated?” Eddie posits. 

A little ill-advised. But it’s not like they’re shit faced. And, well, Eddie doesn’t have a lot of ill-advised fun stories. 

“Oh, let me review with the board,” Buck teases. “Hmm. Apparently it’s fine if we conveniently forget we’re first responders.”

“And parents?” Eddie suggests.

“Oh, yeah. Good call.”

“Then maybe we can have some fun?” Eddie wiggles his eyebrows.

“I like the sound of that.”

---

51 for 📖 (YEAH EDDIE WILL):

---

No one is home. 

As he drives away, he just hopes the gesture will be appreciated and not seen as totally creepy. 

viii. 

It’s a long time before Buck hears back about the gift. Which is good in that, he doesn’t get in trouble for abusing the library cardholder database. He spends two weeks nervous he’s going to hear about that every shift.

When he does hear back about it, it’s the fall. School starts up again, and Christopher is enrolled in the aftercare programs. Buck is relieved when he sees his name on the lists.  Like it’s a sign that perhaps things are okay.

He sees Christopher again before he sees Eddie. Right away during the first week of school. 

“Chris!” Buck exclaims happily when he sees him come through the library doors. “How are you, pal? It’s been a while.”

“I’m good,” Christopher answers happily. Then, he walks over, and gives Buck a quick hug. “Thank you for my books, Buck. They made me smile.”

Buck ends the hug quickly. It’s kind of a discouraged behavior. Though a gray area when the kid initiates. But he’s touched. Happy the gift had an impact, and that Chris remembers. Even after a few months. 

“You’re welcome,” Buck replies. “I’m really glad to see you back, kiddo.”

Chris smiles. “Thanks, Buck.”

It’s a few more days until he sees Eddie. When he does, he’s sort of concerned. It’s not exactly the Eddie he remembers. His hair is shorn. His eyes are tired. There’s a strange pattern of bruises on his forearms. He looks rough. If they were actually friends, Buck would ask him about it. But all he can do is quietly observe.

“It’s good to see you again,” Buck smiles as Eddie approaches the front desk before picking Chris up. “We missed Chris around here.”

Eddie nods. “I, uh… I wanted to thank you. Your gift was really appreciated. Sorry I didn’t say anything sooner.”

“Hey, that’s not why I sent it. Just wanted you both to know… Well, that I’m really sorry.”

“Thank you,” Eddie says. “That’s kind.”

There’s a hollowness in his voice. Like he’s accepted a lot of condolences lately. 

[shallowbreaths]

This is Mary Vincent, she is the biggest badass alive! At 15 she was attacked, brutal raped, hit in the head with a hammer, she had her arms hacked off with a hatchet, and was then thrown off a cliff by the side of the freeway to die. Her survival story is the shit! She says she heard a voice telling her to keep moving or else others would die, so without arms she managed to pack mud into the wounds so she wouldn’t bleed to death, and then she proceeded to scale the cliff with no arms!! She was completely naked, she had severe head trauma, no arms, and they say she had lost 50% of the blood in her body. After scaling the cliff (which she says took her most of a day), she then walked 3 miles before seeing a car with two men that slowed down, but after getting a good look at her they sped off. To which this badass woman said, “I looked terrifying, I don’t hold it against them at all.” Needless to say, she survived. Before allowing herself to even pass out though, she demanded a sketch artist and provided such detail that the monster’s friend saw it on the news and immediately knew it was him and turned him in. Then she testified against the man, and he somehow managed to whisper to her, “if it takes me the rest of my life I’m going to finish what I started.” Oh yeah, btw, it was HIM that released that detail!

Her family could only talk about how it effected them, it was as if they didn’t realize that it was effecting her too. So she was homeless for a while and she obviously had trouble making and maintaining any meaningful relationships. Her attacker got charged with a long list of crimes and got the maximum sentence at the time…. 14 years! He was released for good behavior after 8!!!!

He then tried to sue her after his release, (as one does after brutally raping someone and then cutting their arms off), but the court threw it out. He then moved to Florida where he was an “upstanding member of the community, and great neighbor.” His neighbors said things like, “of course we didn’t like what he’d done, but life goes on.” Yuck! I know this is shocking, but the asshole killed again and a witness saw it. The police arrived at his house and he was covered in blood still. He tried telling some BS story. The woman he killed (a mother of 3) wasn’t highly thought of because she was a sex worker, that’s one reason why they are so often killed, it’s easier to get away with. SOOOO, Florida asked Mary if she’d face the monster again in order to testify to the man’s nature. This badass said, “Hell yes” and flew down. I really hope she whispered to him, “I’m here to finish what I started.” He was convicted again and put on death row. Unfortunately, God got him with cancer before Florida got to finish his story.

This isn’t about him though, he was a disgusting creep that doesn’t deserve a name. This is about Mary fucking Vincent, the biggest badass of all time. Because of this story, there are now laws instituting mandatory life sentences for certain violent crimes. This is about a woman who uses her experience to help teenagers who are sexually assaulted, even though she STILL suffers from such terrible nightmares that she has woken up trying to escape with such violence that she has literally broken bones doing it several times. This is about the woman who went on to have two sons who she says gave a clear and definite reason to keep going. This is about a girl who at 15 says she couldn’t draw a straight line but grew up to be an artist with no arms, who fashions her own custom prosthetics in order to do the things she wants to do.

I’ve never met this woman, but she is one of my heroes! She is magnificent. Fuck that loser who wound up rotting in a cell alone, it could have been a car crash or a tree falling that caused that damage, he is a gross and barely necessary tool that lead to forging something truly amazing. What she has done, overcome, and made from the pieces is so fucking incredible that she should inspire us all. She was NOT disposable, but how easily she could have been. All she had to do was close her eyes at the bottom of that cliff and go to sleep. I’ll bet she could have quit on herself a million times over the years since 1978, but Mary Vincent doesn’t quit. She took the unimaginable and turned it into art. She IS art!

In Mary’s own words, “This is the third phase of my life since that awful day. I went from victim, to survivor, to artist.” Hell yeah you did Mary!

[mindpalace1995]

Chapter One - For the First Time

Characters/Pairings: Loki x Curvy Female Reader Word Count: 12.6k

Content/Warnings: lost of virginity, vaginal penetration, oral sex, unprotected sex and marriage.

It all begins with....

_____________________________HER__________________________

“Oh honey, wasn't that beautiful?” I asked Loki as we stepped over the threshold of the beach house that we would be staying in for the next two weeks for our honeymoon.

“It really was, sweetheart,” he replied, as we released each other's hand, taking strides in separate directions: I immediately headed towards the right, entering the living room, while he took a very authoritative stroll to the kitchen on the left. 

I couldn't wait to have a seat on the massive triple seater brown couch. I really enjoyed how softly it held me up and given how extremely busy the past few weeks have been, soft is definitely what I craved right now. 

As soon as my butt touched the cushions, my fingers were rushing down to locate the respective zippers along either side of the pair of black boots that were on my feet. With a sigh of relief, I freed my toes from the three hour long torture session they had just endured as Loki and I enjoyed our first night out as an officially married couple.

Slowly rubbing my feet, I tried to bring them some comfort. Before meeting Loki, wearing six inch high heeled shoes was not really my style, I was more of a sneakers girl, but now three and a half years later, they have become a normal part of my outfits. The guy’s six feet-four inches tall after all. It took both my neck and feet quite some time to get acquainted with the stature of a god. 

“I quite enjoyed tonight,” he shared. 

Pressing pause on taking care of my feet, I lifted my head to watch him, catching the delightful sight of him in a complete black suit pouring himself a glass of cold water.

Going out for dinner tonight had been my idea and he happily obliged. We had already spent an entire day indoors and it was not doing the activity that newly wedded couples do on their honeymoon. Instead we actually slept. After planning and executing the wedding of our dreams, the both of us were needless to say extremely exhausted. However, the few times that we did rise to our feet, it was to unpack a suitcase, carry out the necessary hygienic measures or to retrieve meals from the nearby food stalls. Once Loki and I got our bearings, I thought it would be nice to start off our honeymoon on a musical note. I was also hoping that it would help set the mood that I was trying to create. That mood being one that was conducive to the consummation of our marriage. 

Lifting the glass to his lips, Loki's eyes met mine and he tilted the glass in my direction, “Would you like some?” he asked. 

“Yes please, thank you baby.” I replied with a warm smile and a nod, watching as he proceeded to reopen the refrigerator. 

Bringing my attention back to my sore feet, I began massaging each of them with both hands. As much as I like being tall while standing next to Loki, my feet sure paid the price for it. The current soreness was similar to that of the early stages in our relationship; where my feet would hurt so much that I would have to ice them after each date. Thankfully with time the muscles in my ankles got stronger and I was even able to run in heels, but with the recent events in my life they had been working on triple duty and not getting enough time to recover. Though, I must applaud them for their commitment and depth of endurance. All within the time span of a little more than twenty four hours they did a very wonderful job of keeping me from stumbling down the aisle and dancing until my heart’s content on my wedding night. Even though they had undergone a tremendous amount of strengthening over the years, I don't think they were prepared for a great deal of dancing less than a day apart. They needed some well deserved rest and I intend on showering them with just that for the rest of our time here in the Caribbean.

Loki soundlessly entered the living room. I swear, if it were not for the years of getting familiar with his presence, I would get scared every single time he unknowingly came next to me. The guy is like a leopard or a chameleon or any other animal that didn’t want you to see them unless it was their decision. Despite the fact that we have been together for a relatively long time, I am still unable to sense him at times. That’s when my heart goes through the not so pleasant journey of fright, anger, anxiety and then finally feeling relief when I realize that the pairs of arms that are wrapping around my abdomen belong to Loki and not some random person who broke into my home. 

Rather than taking a seat on the couch, Loki chose to take a seat on the carpeted floor close to my legs. Raising his right hand over his head, he gave me the condensation-covered glass and I took, swallowing a few sips before placing it on the wooden table to the right side of the couch. “What was your favorite part of the entertainment at the restaurant, Loki?” I enquired while simultaneously continuing to rub my feet. 

“May I have a chance?” he asked with hands open towards my feet. I gave him a nod and seconds later a cool sensation was trickling up my left leg as his large hands greeted my warm skin. “I especially enjoyed the violin,” he went on, casually answering my question while his lengthy fingers moved in repeated circular motions. “That girl’s talent took me on a journey.” His hands slid down my caramel skin to the sole of my foot, causing quiet moans to slip from my lips as he brought an ease to my aches. 

“I liked that part too, sweetheart,” I breathed out a breath of relief. “My mind was definitely not in the present as she played.” It wasn’t in any time period to be exact. As the violinist drew the bow passionately across the strings, creating a very graceful nostalgic melody, my thoughts flowed from one memory to another. Though they all held one thing in common; they were all from a time where I thought that I was not going to find someone. Within seconds I was remembering how lonely those periods of my life were and how unsettling it felt to have gone through the many unpleasant instances of when someone would get brave enough or be just down right inappropriate as they inquired about my love life. 

I’ll never forget the gasps that came from my high school friends when I told them that I never kissed a boy, or the numerous sideways glances that I got when my university classmates brought their partners to dorm parties and I showed up alone. As sad as those memories were, nothing hurt the most than the underlying hits that came from my family.

“Would your boyfriend be attending my birthday party? I would hate for him to not get a chance to taste your Aunty Magaret’s cooking?” Aunty Margaret was my mom’s oldest sister and yes, she likes to refer to herself in the third person. Her question was clearly unseemly, but she tried to dress it up with a sense of fake concern, hoping to express how considerate she was being. Though the concern was directed towards her and not really towards the “boyfriend” in question.

With a witty smile, I replied to her, all the while feeling the heated gaze of my mother and sister as they knew questions like this one tend to get me very upset. “Aunty Marge, I am very happy to inform you that you would not be under any extra amount of stress this year because I do not have a boyfriend and that is my present to you.” I solemnly bowed to her, watching my mom and sister out of the corner of my eyes; they were stifling their laughter. 

That weekend almost the entire family was gathered at Aunty Marge’s home for her 47th birthday. Each year despite the countless offers made by her brothers, sisters, children, nieces and nephews to throw her a party, she always refused. “I like planning and hosting my own parties, it gives me a chance to keep my brain active.” She’d always use an excuse along the lines of wanting to do things on her own while she still can or “Can an old woman be left alone to enjoy her birthday the way that she wishes?” Well in all honesty, she just didn’t trust any of us enough to conceive and execute a party that would live up to her ridiculously high standards. 

The trip down memory lane wasn’t all sadness. It brought a smile to my face as it reminded me of the year that I finally had someone to bring and it turned out that that someone was none other than my very handsome, sweet and considerate husband. Whose hands were presently working on my right foot, eliciting a sweet release from the soreness and leaving a trail of raised pores along the surface of my entire body as a result of his cool touch.

It was during our third year of dating, by that time most of my extended family members no longer wanted to have any relations with me, but that did not stop Aunty Marge from inviting Loki and I. She just couldn't resist having someone unique and well known in her home. Throughout the years, her birthday parties went from being the tool that she used to make herself feel better than most people with, to being an actual high-end event. All the eyes of her important guests were glued to Loki and by extension, me. That night’s chatter was all about “the alien” being with Margaret Smith’s niece. Even with the invitation being accepted on the basis of one rule; no pictures, Aunty Marge loved it. She lived for moments like those, where people of high ranked statuses uttered the Smith’s name and history making events in the same sentence.

Being transparent, I initially did mind. It bothered me tremendously that Loki and I were spoken of in hushed tones and with the most horrible of intentions. Now, years later, I can happily say that there were not many threads of frustration left, but the few that did remain were endlessly being tugged on. If I didn’t have Loki’s words in my ears, “It is simply none of anyone’s business until we deem it so.” I would have let everyone have a piece of my mind and tell them the truth about what I thought of their opinions from the very start.

As the violin solo came to an end, I relived the best memory of them all. Thanks to it being made just a mere two days ago, my brain didn’t have to search too hard to retrieve it; my wedding to Loki. I replayed his breathtaking vows to me, the vision of his emerald eyes getting glassy as I tried to express the depth of my love for him in front of everyone. Once again, I felt the excitedly nervous feeling in my chest when he slipped the ring onto my finger. That’s when it finally dawned on me, that the rest of my life was gonna be one hell of a ride with this Norse god by my side. 

“Loki, honey, I think I’m ready.” I felt the motion of his hands pause before quickly resuming their movements over my foot. He didn’t reply, permitting silence to enter the room and my brain to linger on. In an attempt to not let the quiet overstay its welcome, the thought of going into explanation mode crossed my mind. Maybe it would be the incentive he needed to relax a little and have us finally express our love for one another. Afterall, it has been three and a half years and this is the moment I dreamt about. This is the point in time I’ve been hoping and praying for and I wanted nothing more than to experience it with this man, this god at my feet.

Clearing his throat, the rhythm of his hands sped up a bit, “Are you sure darling? There is absolutely no need to rush, we have the rest of our lives to do this.” I smiled at the back of his head, knowing fully well that something of that nature would leave his lips. As sweet as the sentiment is, consummating our marriage was a bit of a gray area for Loki. On one hand, he loves me. He’d made that quite evident to me long before he declared it in the presence of our friends and family, but on the other hand, I'm a virgin and Loki has been under a sexually inhabiting spell since we began dating. 

I reached out to him, gently stopping the busy stirring of his hands with mine and he turned to look at me. I held his face, swiping my thumbs across his cheeks before leaning down to press a kiss onto his forehead. “I love you, Loki.” I breathed out, releasing his cheeks as I stood to my feet. I grabbed my boots and began taking steps towards the direction of the bedroom. 

I had no idea what came over me, but I started getting undressed along the pathway. Perhaps it was the years of loving Loki in every single aspect except for the physical one or the fact that he has worked so hard at helping me remain pure until we were married. Maybe it wasn’t one or the other, but a culmination of a lot of unexpressed emotions that were bottled up over the years. Whatever the reason maybe, in that moment I wanted nothing more than for us to experience what we have spent time cultivating.

Turning right along the corridor, I placed my boots down on the wooden floor. Five steps later I was unzipping my dress and letting the black sequin material that I wore to compliment Loki’s black suit, fall to the ground. Another few steps forward and I was now standing at the door to our bedroom in my undergarments; a lacey black bra and matching panty. I wanted my husband to be one that took those off me. Leaving the door open as I entered the large room, I got comfortable on the king sized bed, suspecting that it would take some time before Loki came in. 

Undoing the braids of my hair was a nice, slow paced activity that kept my hands busy while the time passed. But, before I knew it, I was on the last braid, unwinding the strips of my black hair and letting the curls fall to my hips. All I needed now was to find something for my mind to focus on because my conscience did not waste any time in making me feel guilty for our present situation. I was the one who wanted to wait until we were married and because of that Loki had to use magic on himself. As a result of that he’s now afraid of hurting me. On top of that, getting to the altar had its fair share of hurdles to jump over and now we were inches away from the finish line and it would seem as though we were unable to cross it. I wanted the confetti. I wanted the medal. I longed for relief from this weight that we’ve been carrying. I desired nothing more than to celebrate with my partner who has been in this crazy race alongside me. 

If we didn't consummate our marriage during our honeymoon, would it happen after we moved into our new home? What if we both needed more than two weeks as a newly married couple to develop that sense of safety and comfortability with being that vulnerable and exposed with each other? I don’t know if my heart could wait that long. I have been eagerly anticipating this time in life, of where I would say “I do” to the man that I would spend the rest of my life loving unconditionally and Loki is that man. I already feel safe and at ease with him. This has to happen tonight. Not only did I want it to, I needed it to. 

I knew the reason for his hesitance could not be that Loki felt uncomfortable to be intimate with me. In fact it was the complete opposite of that. All throughout our courting he’d used his brilliant magical abilities to restrain himself from being overwhelmed whenever we shared small intimate moments. Whether it was making out on my couch or the few times where I would lose myself alittle and let my hormones take control, leading me to grind on his lap. He never gave in to his urges to make love to me. Loki knew how important marriage is to me and giving him my most treasured and purest self was one of the many gifts I wanted to give him. I wanted to be his and no one else’s. No, Loki’s tentativeness was not due to a lack of comfort, it was because of fear. He was afraid of losing control and endangering me. 

“Deep in thought are we?” I jumped, startled by the sudden sound of Loki’s smooth voice zapping me out of my train of thought. I did not sense him at all. Out of instinct, my hands rushed to grab the covers, but then I remembered, he’s my husband now. It’s allowed for him to see me in my undergarments. My fingers set the blanket free. 

“Just thinking about all the times we came close, but didn’t, because we wanted to wait for this night.” Hopping off the bed, I turned around to see him and immediately paused, needing to inhale a deep breath. A few feet from the now closed door, stood a shirtless Loki. 

I’ve never seen his exposed upper body before. The closest I’ve ever come to seeing him reveal some skin was whenever he wore an armless jersey and even that was a rare occasion. I usually just tried not to stare at his biceps, which required a great deal of effort to look somewhere else when all I really wanted to do was admire the definitions of his muscles. 

Three days ago, there was nothing I could have done about how excited the sight of Loki made me feel. Now, there was no need to divert my gaze, instead I confidently let my eyes linger along his smooth muscular midsection as I resumed my steps towards him; closing the gap between us with a hug. I was made aware of how nervous he truly was; his heartbeat was resounding in his chest like a drum. Breaking the hug I looked up at his face, he appeared so calm and still. I would have never guessed he was anxious if his heart had not just told me otherwise. 

He tilted his head down to meet my gaze and those emerald green eyes of his began burrowing within me. “We can wait alittle while longer if you like?” He offered. The pull of his eyes made it quite evident that he was hoping to draw out a yes from my lips, but that was not the case. Instead, I paid attention to how tense Loki was and I tried to get him to relax. 

“Baby,” I whispered, taking his hand and leading him to the bed. Tightening my grip as I climbed onto it and folded my legs to have a seat. I motioned for him to do the same and without any objections, he did. That made me smile. It was yet another example of one of his little gestures in doing something regardless of if he thought it was silly or not because he was doing it for me. Loki has undergone an enormous amount of maturity within the last few years; from almost destroying the world to not wanting to hurt his wife in the threads of passion. “We’ve spoken about this before, sweetheart you will never hurt me. I know your level of strength is different because you’re a god, but Loki you love me and I trust in that.” I hope that was the right thing to say.

“Darling, I know that you trust me,” his tone suggested that that was not the issue at hand. “You do know that I am overwhelmed by you, right?” I knew it was a rhetorical question, but I couldn't help but nod at him. He took a deep breath. “I’ve held that part of me down for so long that I’m genuinely frightened by what could happen now that I can set it free.” His thumb began running over my hand, a more evident sign of the increasing extent of his nerves getting the better of him.

 “Loki, I want you to set that part of yourself free.” I got on my knees, bringing my face to be inches from his. “Let's make love to each other.” He stared straight into my eyes, his gaze not faltering for a second. Having his full attention, I decided to make use of it. “Loki, you are my soulmate,” I cupped his face in my small hands. “And I have been waiting patiently, excitedly and even alittle nervously for this time. I don’t wanna speak for you, but I can deduce that it has been a bit of a similar experience for you too.” He responded with a slight nod and I gave him a soft smile. “Then let’s get to it baby. I wanna make love to you until you can’t take it anymore and you have to beg me to take a break.” From his slightly parted lips came a gasp and his eyes widened at my words. That’s the reaction I wanted! 

Loki snapped his fingers.

Instantly every hair follicle on my body was awakened by the sudden chill in the air and I knew that I was utterly naked before him.

Neither of us proceeded to say a word, letting the soft sound of our breaths weakly fight off the quietness that slowly seeped into the room. Releasing his face, I looked down at my completely exposed body. My eyes were suddenly magnifying every single flaw that it could find; the too light or too dark sections within the different areas of my skin, the two stomach rolls that formed whenever I sat, the array of stretch marks scribbled along my arms and waist and not forgetting the numerous unshapely parts of me. Having all of this be my body did not bother me until now, until having it be presented to Loki. What if he thinks I’m not attractive or can’t bring himself to make love to me? I was so caught up in the pull of my hormones that I never really questioned whether or not my body was even desirable to Loki.  

Neither of us made a move, but I could feel Loki’s gaze surveying my frame, his eyes registering every second of the reaction that I was having to what he had just done. 

How do I feel about it? Angry? Not even alittle. 

A bit caught off guard that’s for sure. 

Nervous to be naked in front of him? One hundred percent, but if I’ve learnt anything about this crazy, complex guy over the past years, it is that he loves me. 

Lightly exhaling, I tried to slow the galloping of my heart against my chest. This is it, I thought to myself. The first of many steps that has to be taken, all I have to do now is keep taking one step after another and hope that I did not land on my face. The deafening quiet rang in my ears, letting me know that our breaths had lost the first round of the fight against the silence. 

Gradually elevating my gaze, my eyes were surprisingly met with the sight of Loki also being completely stripped of his clothing before me. At least he didn’t appear to be nervous like I’m pretty sure that I am. Instead he kept gauging my response. I wanted to let him know that I was not irritated by what he did, I couldn’t have his thoughts leading him down some dark road. I needed his mind to be focused on all of the positive outcomes that can result from tonight.  

Not trusting my voice, I took his left hand in mine and gave it a light squeeze, hoping he would understand. Thankfully, he did. 

“Ready?” He asked in such a shockingly calming tone for someone who was apprehensive about making love to their wife for the first time. I nervously nodded and he slowly began closing the inches between our lips. 

Our kisses were soft and slow and I was very grateful for it. It wasn’t that my love for Loki didn’t burn bright and fierce, I just didn’t want us to rush and risk messing up our first time together. 

Each time our lips met it felt strange. Not Strange in a bad way, but strange in a really great way. In an excitedly nervous, yet frighteningly exhilarating way. We’ve never allowed ourselves to see each other naked before, now added on to that was the wonder of us getting to passionately kiss and not have to stop because one of us got too caught up in the moment: it was utterly freeing. 

One of the many things that I love about Loki’s kisses was that they were filled with a mixture of both cool and hot air. That was one of the unlimited gifts he’d been given with being a god that held both Asgardian and Jotunheim lineages. I especially appreciated the specific times that he chose to use that particular talent of his. During the winter seasons he kept his kisses warm to help me cope with the cold and when the hot days became unbearable, I was kept from becoming a sweaty mess by his cool lips. 

The growing sounds of our moans and heavy breathing flowed out of us like water, I could sense the silence steadily being drowned in it. Good. I needed to hear us. More specifically, I needed to be able to listen to Loki. Seeing that I’ve never made love to anyone before, I welcomed all of the help that I can get. With every utterance of his filling my ears and the humming of his throat swimming through my mouth, I intended on using them as a guide when it comes to pleasing my husband. I gave my unbroken attention to Loki. Ensuring that our first time together was not a major disaster was of highest priority. I wanted this night to be a happy memory for the both of us. 

His lips drifted from mine, granting me the chance to catch my breath, though I didn’t mind him being the one that took it away to begin with. He leisurely trailed light kisses along my left cheek, my jaw and before I was aware of it, his lips were deeply diving into the side of my neck, pulling loud moans out of my chest as they repeatedly dipped. 

It would appear that Loki and I had the same plan when it came to exploring these uncharted waters; let the sound and current be our guide.

A few seconds after I announced my delight in his lips sinking into my neck, his large hands encased around my waist and he began guiding me onto his lap, cautiously bringing my midsection onto his. The sensation of how ready he was beneath me had me drawing in a breath. I wrapped my arms over his shoulders and leaned down to greet his lips with mine. I couldn’t help but smile over his lips, feeling a bit smug and relieved, at least we were off to a great start. 

After a minute or two or three, (I lost count), of our lips molding into each other, I drew my lips back and made a request known to Loki, “Give me your tongue, baby.” Without hesitation, his lips were energetically returning to mine and this time our tongues were dancing over each other, making a ball of warmth form in my midsection. His hands proceeded to slide down from my waist, gripping handfuls of my flesh along the way. Firstly, squeezing at my hips, then his fingers latched onto my thighs, inviting them to spread alittle more in response to his touch. A wetness began pooling between my legs and I knew that my body was ready to receive Loki. 

I can’t recall the exact second that it occurred, but the previous thoughts of my body not being presentable enough for Loki were no longer swimming around in my head. Each time we kissed it felt more intense than the last. His moans had eventually taken on the form of a lasso as they seeped into the layers of my skin. Raising every single pore along the surface as they looped around my heart, strongly drawing all of me into him. It felt as though I was floating yet somehow I remained comfortably and safely stationed on Loki’s lap. 

He pressed me closer to him and I instinctively began grinding on his lap. Gently brushing my lower lips along the length of his shaft. By the third movement Loki broke our kiss and I immediately opened my eyes to witness him having a reaction that I’ve never seen from him before. His eyes were still closed, but his lips were slightly parted as a breath was caught in his throat. For the first few seconds I was frozen in shock, I found it really challenging to believe that I was having that effect on him. Then his hands tightened their grip around my waist and he started carefully rocking my midsection over his, slowly dissolving my doubt with every roll of my hips. 

Crashing my lips back onto Loki’s, I had to admit that all of this felt very electric; the sensation of our bare skin pressed onto each other, experiencing what it feels like being comfortable enough to be totally vulnerable with the person I love and who loves me in return. During the course of dating, Loki and I have had some moments where we were not completely in control of the desires that we felt for each other, but none of the things we slipped up and did ever made me feel like this; invigorated yet oddly relaxed at the same time. Usually, I was too busy reeling from the guilt of not executing the right amount of self-control to enjoy our sexual advancements. To my great satisfaction, this is not one of those times. No. This is the point in time where I get to finally share all of myself with Loki and have him do the same with me. 

With a light tug on his hair, I made his head tilt back as an audible moan escaped his lips. Capitalizing on the sight of the side of his neck, I earnestly pressed my lips onto his skin. Lavishing him with a steady mixture of kisses and bites, hoping that I was using enough force to produce marks as a token for him to remember this moment by. I took delight in his moans and the smooth rhythm of his tip continuously greeting my folds. I felt my self confidence growing each time Loki’s fingers dug into my hips, it was the sign that I needed to see; him enjoying himself, him enjoying me. 

“Sweetheart, your hips are so wide,” I smiled at his comment, bringing my lips back to kissing his. I didn’t want to stop. How could I? Every time I ran my tongue over his, the deliciously smooth meeting got me intoxicated and my husband is the only supply I don’t mind getting high off of. His hands descended, grabbing at my ass cheeks as he carried on assisting me with grinding over his tip. Moaning into his grip, I bucked my head and sucked in a breath. “I really love that there’s alot to hold on to back there,” Loki’s hands continued to massage my cheeks. “Can I feel you in my mouth darling?” Needing to focus on breathing, I replied with a nod. Within the blink of an eye, I was laying flat on my stomach and Loki was on his knees behind me, bringing the moisture out of me with each grasp of my cheeks. 

A ticklish chill raced over my body as he began trailing kisses down the curve of my spine. His lips went on to lightly brush across my right ass cheek, then without warning, his teeth were clamping down on my flesh, causing a ripple of sweet pain to flow through my being. A loud moan spilled out of my throat and I felt him smiling against my cheek. “If that’s what happens when I bite you there,” his hand softly rubbed the spot where he had just bitten me. “Then I can’t wait to see how you would react when I really taste you.” A wetness was now pooling between my legs from all of the anticipation. 

Loki switched cheeks, repeatedly sinking his teeth onto my left cheek. Just when I got accustomed to the sensation of his bites, he spanked me and without hesitation I locked my teeth onto the pillow beneath me, suppressing my moans. Wiggling my hips from side to side, I shook off the remnants of the stinging sensation. “I’m loving the view,” he whispered into my right ear, “I can watch your ass jiggle all day, baby.” 

“Thank you,” I flirted back at him, “You are very much welcome to stare at it anytime.”

“Oh darling, I want to do so much more than just stare at it.” I smiled and shook my head at his comeback.

“I miss your lips Loki,” I moaned for him.

He brought himself to lay next to me and I rolled onto my side, propping my head on my hand to get a better look at him. “Is all of what we did so far alright with you?” His voice was soft with concern. All of the fright about hurting me still hadn’t left him. 

“Of course, lover,” I caressed his face with my free hand. “Loki, I would let you know if I'm hurt or if I feel uncomfortable in any way, okay?” He briefly closed his eyes and nodded at me. Leaning in, I planted a kiss onto his forehead. So far Loki has been the brave one; he initiated by helping us get fully naked, he made the first move in kissing me and he even guided me onto him. I saw and greatly appreciated his efforts, now it was my turn to put some energy into this as well. Scooting a bit closer to Loki, I draped my right leg over his and pushed him onto the bed. Just when he landed flat on his back, I climbed onto his lap, bringing my face to be inches from his, “I am fine. I am thoroughly enjoying my husband at the moment.” I collided my lips with his, over and over again. 

Loki’s hands enclosed around my waist, his fingers securing onto my flesh, causing me to pour moans into his mouth. “I like the sound of your moans, sweetheart.” I smiled as I blushed over his lips. 

“Then keep doing things to make me moan, baby.” I watched as his emerald eyes lit up at that request. His lips did not return to mine, rather he slid downward below me until his mouth was at the same level as my breasts. His soft lips greeted them, triggering a response from my legs, making them instinctively press onto his midsection. My body craved that particular part of my husband and I finally got the opportunity to satisfy that desire.

Keeping his eyes on me, Loki took my right breast in his mouth. His cheeks hollowed as he persistently sucked on it until I was tugging on his hair in fits of pleasure. At this point, multiple moans and groans were escaping my lips and I felt him smiling over my breast. His hand enfolded around my left breast, completely covering it as he massaged, making my nipple hard and arousing me even more than I already was. 

“Sweetheart?” Loki’s mouth and hand paused over my breasts. “Can I taste you?” I asked, noting the change in his expression as his eyes slowly widened and his jaws clenched around my soft flesh. Was that a good sign? The hold that both his hand and mouth had on my breasts went slack. He gingerly set them free. Swallowing, he nodded at me, giving me the green light to explore him.

Using my lips as the tool to get acquainted with Loki's body, I began my mission by pressing lingering kisses to his forehead, on either side of his cheeks and repeatedly layering his lips with mine until we were both gasping for air. Drawing my lips back, I ran my tongue over his lips before leaning back in to bite his lower lip. Loki didn't even flinch. Rather a growl rattled out of his chest and into my veins, continuing to excite me while his hands clasped down on both my ass cheeks. 

Moving downward, I brought my lips to his neck, feeling his pulse under my eager kisses and smelling the sweet scent of his cologne. Next, I was introducing myself to both of his collarbone dips, enjoying his moans as I massaged them with my lips. Sliding lower, I arrived at his midsection, where I made sure to sink my teeth into the left side of his abdomen and this time, he flinched; making me giggle. It was clear that he was nervous to have my face this close to his manhood, just as I was, to be tasting him for the first time.  

Meeting his V-Line, I paused. I have never done anything like this before in my life. I'm not sure what the proper way might be to do this, but I knew what my instincts were saying to me and if there's one thing the human instinct knows how to do exceptionally well; it's sex. 

Kissing his V-Line, I admired the sight of his excited manhood. The nerves stirred in my chest while my mouth simultaneously watered in anticipation. Without a doubt I didn't want to disappoint Loki and the only way to accomplish that was with his help. “Babe?” I met his eyes with mine. 

“Yes, dear,” he immediately responded.

Taking in a deep breath, I timidly voiced my thoughts to him. “Would you guide me through this please? Let me know if I’m doing it properly.” That way I can get a sense of what he likes without embarrassing myself and also not letting Loki down in the process. 

“Absolutely, darling,” he gave me a gentle smile, “We have our entire lives to learn each other.” Returning the smile, I took in another breath, reminding myself to take it one step in front of the other. There is no need to rush. Rushing can lead to mistakes and the both of us didn't work tirelessly to reach this celebratory point to then mess it up. 

Gently taking Loki in my right hand, I instantly realized how truly big he was. My fingers were unable to completely enclose around him. Moving at a gingerly rate, I began gliding my palm along his smooth length. 

Before I knew it, Loki's eyes were closed and the sounds of his shallow breaths were filling the room. Building a momentum, I increased the speed of my hand, letting the sweet sound of his moans seep into my heart. It would appear that I was not as bad as I assumed myself to be, afterall. He seemed to be really enjoying it so far.

After a few more pumps and numerous words of self encouragement, I brought my hands to a stop. Keeping my eyes on the task at hand, I could feel Loki's attention locked on me. Going against my anxiety, I hovered over him, aligning my mouth over his tip. 

“Darling, you don't have to do this if you don't want to, you are aware of that right?” He reached out for my free hand and I gave it to him, interlocking our fingers. 

Meeting him with my eyes, he gave me a reassuring nod and I felt the affection of his patience and understanding towards me for what I was about to do. “Yeah, I do. I really want to try, I'm just a bit nervous, that's all.” He gave my hand a light squeeze. 

“You've done a wonderful job so far, sweetheart. Don't overthink it. Trust yourself, listen to your body and to me and I know you'll do great.” I reciprocated his squeeze. 

Inhaling a long breath, I aimed at loosening the tightness in my chest. It's my first time, I'm allowed to make mistakes aren't I? Running my hand a few more times over Loki’s length, I closed in on his tip. Pressing my lips softly onto it like I would to his lips whenever we kiss. Sliding my tongue over his smooth bulb like I usually do when I reach my tongue out for his. 

I took Loki into my mouth. Hearing him catch his breath as I welcomed him in, sent an immediate warm wetness to spring between my legs. With my teeth sheathed, I began breathing through my nose as I bobbed my head and moaned around his shaft. The sensation of him repeatedly sailing over my tongue was so mesmerizing, that I couldn't help but moan around his girth. It was as though smooth silk was massaging my entire body rather than just my mouth. “Oh my, sweethea…..” his voice trailed off in pleasure. “Now….. please move your hand…..while you do that.”

Listening to him, I diligently rotated my wrist while I moved my right hand up and down, ensuring to pass over the length of him that my mouth couldn't hold. Opening my mouth as wide as I could, I continued gliding my lips over him. “You’re. Doing. Really. Great. Darling.” He tried to encourage me in between moans. “Look at me, baby.” He gently tucked my hair behind my ears so that I could see him clearly. 

Loki's emerald stare flowed right through me. Even with his mouth opened, vacuuming air, his eyes stayed fixed on every movement that I took. 

I love seeing him like this; losing himself in pleasure, and not because of just any kind of pleasure, but pleasure that was brought on by me. I started bobbing my head alittle faster and he bucked his hips below me, moving in timing with the dip of my mouth. 

Moments later, I felt his hot precum gracing my taste buds. Sweeping my eager tongue over his tip, I proceeded to clean him. Unable to control the moans that escaped me while I swallowed every drop that left him. 

I've always wondered what the flavor of Loki might be. Would he be tangy? Sweet? Would I even know of a word to best describe him? Would I be able to compare him to something that I've tasted before? Releasing him from the grip of my lips, I leaned back, savoring the first taste that I got of my husband.

I can without a doubt say that I have never tasted anything like Loki before. His concoction was a delightful blend of sweet and savory along with all of the little bursts of flavor in between. “You have a very unique taste Loki,” I swiped my index finger along his length, keeping my eyes on him as I gathered more of his precum, ushering it into my mouth. I absorbed the view of his pupils dilating at the sight of me licking him off of my finger. “I really like it.” I smiled. 

Crawling on my hands and knees, I made my way up to Loki's face, giving him a taste of himself as I kissed him, running my tongue over his. 

My body was greatly beginning to get impatient now, “Loki, can we please get to the main event already?” I inquired, biting his nose and making him chuckle. His hand cupped my right breast, softly massaging it. As expected, he was being very gentle with me. I knew all of this foreplay didn’t worry him as much in comparison to actually having sex, I saw how heavy it weighed on his heart. “Hey,” he tilted his head back to get a proper look at me. “Thank you for guiding me through that. I really appreciate you letting me indulge in your body like that.” 

He kissed me, “You are most welcome my dear.” 

“As incredible as that was Loki, my body is aching for you at this point. Feel,” taking his hand off of my breast, I led it in between my legs, gently letting his middle finger greet my wet folds. Eliciting loud moans to stream out of both of our parted lips. “Do you feel how ready I am for you?” I rolled my hips, sliding my mid section along the length of his finger. Proudly, watching as Loki’s eyes closed, relishing the feel of the moment. 

When they reopened, I slipped his hand away from my entrance, ushering his now wet digit into my mouth. Causing another set of moans to hum in our chests. Quite a few gasps left Loki as I repeatedly ran my tongue over his finger, cleaning myself off of him. “That was not yours to taste,” his voice turned deep while he toyed with me. Quickly taking his face in my hands, I kissed him. Sailing my tongue over his and biting his lower lips, again and again. 

Breaking the kiss, I rolled onto my back, “Get your taste straight from the source baby.” A wicked smirk formed across his face and I bent my legs to give him all the access he needed and he indeed got all of the tastings he wanted. 

My body shivered alittle as his cool kisses to my lower lips made my pores raise. “Oh darling, I haven't even started yet.” He slowly slipped his tongue into me and with that one motion I was arching my back in sweet pleasure. 

Loki began lapping at me, using his tongue as though he was gulping down the last drink of water in his life. His silver tongue ran over my inner folds, causing shots of sheer ecstasy to radiate through me. Instinctively, I opened my thighs wider, giving his tongue all the area that it needed to go to work.

“Oh. My. God,” This was the most intense pleasure I have ever felt and the main attraction hasn’t even started yet. 

“Yes dear, I am right here.” That made me giggle and I felt him smiling in between my legs. His tongue smoothly flowed over my clitoris, emitting giddy satisfaction, over and over again. “Do you know how exquisite you taste my darling?” He questioned, keeping his eyes linked with mine. 

I took a few deep breaths, “Loki, if you keep at it, I’m gonna cum in your mouth.” He paused, crawling upwards over my body to bring his face closer to mine. 

“That’s very much alright with me, dear.” He casually swept his tongue over his lips, consuming the glistening remnants of me.

I kissed him intensely, tasting myself on his tongue. “I don’t want that to be the first time that I came with you.” Slipping my fingers into his hair, I gave it a light tug. Then with my other hand, I reached down for his manhood, taking it in my right hand, I started slowly moving my hand up and down his thick shaft. Enjoying the sight of him closing his eyes and swallowing. “I want to cum on this part of you for our first time.”

“Then I….. I sh…shall please my wife.” He stammered out in a soft voice. All of Loki's positive reactions so far were really beginning to make me think that I was not going to disappoint my husband on our honeymoon. Maybe I can make him happy. Maybe I truly can satisfy him. At least I'm gonna try my utmost best to. 

Continuing to move my hands, I planted my lips onto his, drinking in his moans as they flooded my mouth. After a few moments, I released Loki and he knew what we were supposed to do next. 

Days leading up to my wedding night I had come to terms with the reality of losing my virginity; it would hurt. There was nothing I or Loki could do to avoid it. I understood that that was a part of the nature of the act. I also knew that if we are to have a more rewarding love life, this step needs to be achieved successfully. 

Gripping his manhood in his right hand, Loki guided himself to my entrance. With the tip of his shaft, he eased himself in between my inner folds, driving me insane with anticipation. “Are you ready sweetheart?” Looking up at me, he waited for my signal. I nodded in response. “I am just trying to get you as wet as possible to ease the pain that will come.” He glided his shaft in between my lower lips. “I'm not going to give you false hope, darling this will hurt, but it will also get better. I promise you.”

“I trust you, Loki.” I affectionately laid a kiss onto his forehead.

Aligning his tip with my entrance, Loki cautiously entered me, his girth gradually stretching me to accommodate the size of him. 

Curling my fingers into a fists, I immediately shut my eyes. This was the most painful experience my vagina has ever been through. As he carefully slid in and out of me, it reminded me of blowing up a balloon. The more air that enters it, the greater the air pressure and that causes the rubber to expand. Eventually, with enough air the balloon displays the fun features it was made for; to be pretty and float. In this case, I was the balloon, I was the one that was uniquely made to receive all of Loki and he was the one that made me feel as though I could defy the laws of gravity and float. The pressure kept building up inside of me and the only time I got some release was when he glided out of me. 

Although I could not see him, I didn’t need my sight to know that with every gesture that Loki took he was undoubtedly being delicate with me. I could feel it in the timidness of his hips as he repeatedly eased himself in and out of me. I sensed it in the absence of his lips against mine. For he knew that I would need to be taking in deep breaths as my body repeatedly welcomed that special part of him and he did not want to hinder the adjustment process. I also heard it in his breathing; the sound of air being sucked into his nostrils, followed by the sensation of his hot breath skimming over my face as it exited his lungs. 

“How bad is it?” He asked, entering me for the eighth time, not sliding out. 

Even though it was really intense, I didn’t want to scare him, but based on his question he was already aware of my discomfort, so there was no way that I could hide the truth from him. My eyes fluttered open, bringing clarity to the vision of a very worried Loki on top of me. Swallowing, I took his face in my hands, “It isn’t so bad.” I inhaled through my nose and exhaled through my mouth. “On a scale from one to ten, it feels like a five. I can take it, Loki.” I tried my best to sound confident while encouraging myself in the same breath.

“Are you sure you would like for me to keep going?” There was a particular thickness in his voice as he wore a look that I have come to know all too well. Furrowed eyebrows along with eyes that searched your soul and jaws that were slightly clenched as though his teeth were steel bars and he was using them to keep his words caged in inside of his mouth; his expression of concern. I nodded reassuringly at him, sweeping my thumbs over his cheekbones. “Baby, you are incredibly tight,” he breathed out before resting his forehead on the crook of my neck. “And I’m not even fully inside of you yet.” My eyes could not have opened any wider. Thank God Loki wasn’t able to see my reaction to this new bit of information, otherwise he would have brought all of this to an end right then and there. I knew my fingers were not able to completely wrap around his girth, but how big is my husband?

Breathing in through my nose and out through my mouth, I sought to ready my mind and body for the more of Loki to come. Afterall, the vagina is the strongest organ ever designed. It is able to deliver the miracle of a baby and heal itself. “I need us to see this through Loki.” I said, beginning to smoothen the hair at the back of his head with the palm of my right hand. “Like you said, it’s gonna be painful at first, but pleasure awaits us.” I kissed the crown of his head, “We’ve waited long enough, let’s go discover it.”

“Remember what I said about not wanting to hurt you,” he raised his head to lock eyes with me, “Please tell me if it becomes too much for you.” The apprehension in his voice was palpable. Sweetly brushing his lips over my left cheek, Loki delicately drew his hips back and gently resumed gliding into me. I fought against my natural instinct to close my eyes, instead I redirected my focus on counting every single time he connected with me. 

Thirty-seven. Loki lightly thrusted into me thirty-seven more times. It took the first three times for me to get familiar with the specific tempo of his hips, but once I got it, I was able to regulate my breathing to help me receive him. Whenever Loki sailed into me, I breathed out and when he slid out of me, I breathed in. That helped tremendously. By the seventeenth thrust, the pain began to progressively lessen in small amounts. To such an extent that by the twenty-second movement it became bearable. I was beginning to feel my midsection becoming more and more acquainted with the size of my husband.

“Darling,” he paused mid thrust, “You have been such a brave girl so far.” I smiled nervously at him for a brief moment, then I went back to keeping in time with my breathing. I wanted to be prepared for his next thrust, but he didn’t move. “Do you think you’re ready for me to go all the way in now?”

Closing my eyes, I sucked in as much air as both of my lungs can take in. We’ve come a long way and made a monumental degree of progress. I let the carbon-dioxide flow out of my lungs. I unquestionably knew that Loki would not be bothered if I chose to bring all of this to a pause, in fact he will be a bit relieved if I did, but I also knew that if we were to ever try this again, it will not be in the near future. For I know how that brilliant mind of my over protective husband works; the longer we postpone this, the more time it will have to hunt for a reason for us to discontinue exploring this unfamiliar territory all throughout our honeymoon. Once Loki gets set in the pursuit of a mission, there is little to nothing that will deter him from it. He’s sort of stubborn in that way, especially when it comes to his notion of my safety in relation to him. 

I can’t have his hardheadedness win nor would I allow his overactive imagination to spoil what Loki and I have dreamt about for all these years. Unlike him, I did not have the help of magic on my side when it came to controlling my every intimate desire for the person I wholeheartedly loved. I did however take other precautions; I prayed, exercised, took a lot of cold showers and even on occasion canceled my dates with Loki. Because all it would take is just one look from him and I would get wobbly in the knees. 

Getting to this moment took an immense amount of patience, effort and energy from the both of us, I am not going to back out of it now. “Absolutely,” I answered, “Let’s make this marriage official baby.” I smiled softly while nodding at him. He reciprocated with a nervous smile of his own, which only served to highlight the look of worry on his face. “What about you? Are you ready, Loki?” I asked concerningly.  

Whatever little space existed between us, Loki proceeded to occupy it, bowing until his forehead tenderly touched mine. “Yes, yes I am, my love,” he expressed with a sense of clear determination which brought me a sizable amount of relief; he wasn’t letting the intrusive thoughts win tonight. We were finally going to become one. 

Loki slowly followed through on his thrust, completely entering me this time. Instinctively, I held my breath, my body shaking a little.

I kept that air locked in my throat for as long as I could, for I knew that the millisecond it left my body, I would experience the cost of receiving the true size of Loki. For the first time since we began, I felt scared. Not of Loki, but of the high level of pain that my midsection would have to register in order to harbor all of my husband. 

“Breathe, my love,” he coached, proceeding to act out the motion of taking in a deep breath while nodding encouragingly at me. 

After what felt like the longest minute in history, accompanied by some skepticism, I listened to him. Setting the air free, I was gradually being made aware of the tense tightness as it descended upon my midsection. Tears sprang to my eyes, but I held them in. Crying wouldn’t help, in fact it would give my husband more of an incentive for us to stop. What would definitely help is oxygen. Opening my mouth, I panted for it, welcoming the relaxation it brought to the muscles in my midsection. 

The earlier discomfort of Loki entering me for the first time was smooth sailing in comparison to this. This recent addition of Loki caused a great increase in pressure. It made me feel so full that I couldn’t help, but picture the balloon bursting. “Darling, I am going to move now,” he announced. His soft voice overflowed with kindness as he lifted his forehead off of mine; giving me enough room to gather myself. “Please try to regain control of your breathing.” He cautiously glided out of me and I progressively felt the intensity of the pressure declining as he withdrew every inch of himself from within me. 

In that moment I took the fullest breath of my life, as though I was coming up for air after a deep dive. My midsection was throbbing in response to what it had just experienced. Latching my fingers onto Loki’s biceps, I started reestablishing my equilibrium. Closing my eyes, I aimed at regulating my breathing; in through my nose then out through my mouth. In through my nose. Out through my mouth. In through my nose and out through my mouth. Secondly, I readied my mind; even though it feels considerably painful right now, something beautiful is happening here and we are strong enough to see this through. Loki’s lips sweetly pressed onto my forehead. “I know that was quite more than what you are familiar with, we can stop if you like.” He suggested. 

“No, I’ll be alright,” I breathed out, barely opening my eyes. “Just keep going at a really nice, slow pace and I’ll be able to handle you.” His features of trepidation solidified as he nodded at me. 

Loki fully sailed into me again, but this time I expected the pain. I was prepared for it, to the level that all of my senses were heightened.  

By his tenth full entry, my nails were lightening their grip on Loki’s flesh due to the twinge of pain between my legs being downgraded from a constricting ache to the status of pulsing tension. As long as I didn’t deviate from the breathing pattern, I was able to continue giving my husband the warm, wet welcome, that which he more than deserved. 

With our little moans of pleasure floating through each other’s ears, my eyes followed the mysterious pathways of Loki’s features. Taking in the view of his prominent Adam’s Apple that was right above me. Panning down to witness the best combination of muscle growth and definition I have ever seen and that’s high praise coming from a physiotherapist. I gazed on in awe as his muscle fibers took me on a journey of many different twists and turns. They were flexing beautifully, on account of the time intervals in which he now dipped into me becoming shorter. He was creating exactly the amount of buildup that my body needed; not too quick to be overbearing and not too slow to drag along the pressure. 

My attention was drawn in by his rigid shoulders, followed by his firm biceps and chiseled chest. I very much wanted to know how every inch of their surface felt against my lips. 

His chest became my focal point of concentration. The way it periodically rose and fell helped remind me to take this one breath at a time and not give up on the account of the temporary pain. It also kept me enlightened about Loki. I noticed that he was maintaining a breathing sequence of his own; via his nose, he lightly exhaled when he entered me and inhaled when he withdrew. 

“Hey,” I called to him, setting his biceps free to tenderly cup his face in my hands. Tilting my head back a little, I tried to lock eyes with him, but he was staring at the bed’s headboard. Something wasn’t right. 

My husband is the champion amongst champions when it comes to concealing his feelings or anything else that he wants to for that matter. It took me three and a half months to figure out his expression of hurt. If it wasn’t for the empty words that so effortlessly left his mouth, I would have never been able to recognize when something is bothering him. Loki is exceedingly skillful at keeping his physical features composed, but that mouth of his is always ready to counter an objection if necessary. That’s why this was such a shock to me when his eyes didn’t meet mine. Eye contact was part of the faÇade. It was his way of connecting the full performance to the person’s conscience; it assisted with the validity in whatever it is he wanted them to believe is true.

Not returning my gaze meant that he was unable to hold his pretension together. He was trying to hide something from me, but his face was not cooperating. Is it that he wasn’t enjoying himself? Was it because he was doing the majority of the work and I was just laying here? I wasn’t showing him that I was finding this pleasurable either, am I right? 

I tried to fix it, “Loki, you are doing this precisely in the way that I need you to. I feel incredibly safe and at ease with you, my love.” Earlier, he was certainly attentive enough to compliment me on my boldness yet he lacked the insightfulness to see it on himself. 

With a moan he rolled his hips into me, “Thank you, sweetheart.” The sound of another syllable rumbling in his throat as he still failed to look at me.

I moved my thumbs in circular motions over his cheeks. “Hey, we can take a break if you like.” He was so preoccupied with the thought of me needing a pause, that he never considered the possibility that he may need one as well. 

“I think that might be best,” closing his eyes, Loki sucked in air, turning his face to the left so he didn’t have to see me as he gently rested on my chest. I did not know what to say, instead I rubbed circles over his back while I listened to the sounds of our breaths even out. “I did not anticipate that making love to you would be this challenging for me.” He spoke after a few minutes. 

“Loki, if you are not satisfied, we can try again at another time.” We can talk about what isn’t to our liking and make an attempt to remedy it. I am very much willing to learn, I would love to make my husband happy and not give him all the work to do when it comes to our intimacy. 

“What?” He raised his head, finally looking at me. “That’s not the reason I needed a respite.” The confusion in his voice matched the puzzled painted expression on his face; he wasn’t acting to spare my feelings. “Darling, I have been fighting with myself the second I felt how tight and warm you held me between those deliciously thick thighs of yours.”

“Why? What’s wrong?” He’s been in self conflict all of this time?

“Not wrong, but thoroughly all kinds of right,” Pushing onto the palm of his hands, he brought his forehead to connect with mine. “You, my wife. My sweet, very innocent and very beguiling mortal, you are tugging at a desire deep within me.” His nose trailed over mine, his hot breaths fanning across my face, mirroring the brewing heat in my midsection that was caused by his words. I felt a new spring of wetness releasing from in between my legs and I couldn’t help, but clench down on Loki. That made his jaw slightly unlock as he squeezed his eyes shut. “I would love to do so many things to you,” he lightly brushed his lips over mine, “But I know better.” His eyes reopened and this time they didn’t falter from mine. “My mind knows better too, but my body is being greatly tested.” He closed the inches between us, taking my lower lips in between his teeth, giving it tiny bites as he sucked on it. 

My body reacted on its own; digging my heels into the mattress I began rocking unto Loki’s shaft. Soaking wet and desperate for friction now. Needing stability, I brought my hands down from his face to clasp around his neck. Taking delight in how slowly I stretched to enveloped as much of him that I could from this position. I tipped my head back, slipping my bottom lip out from the hold of his teeth, raising my chin to him. Immediately, he knew what I wanted. His lips crashed into mine and we both abandoned our breathing patterns. 

Maybe it was two minutes or maybe it was three or maybe it was more and I lost track of time. However long it was, it was enough for the tension in my midsection to evolve into a sweet pain, for beads of sweat to form and trickle down my temple. The liberation I found in our hungry kisses felt natural. It was both a relief and a release to be filled with his moans and his manhood at the same time. Every single time that his tongue reached out for mine, I instinctively and enthusiastically gave it to him. Letting them repeatedly glide over each as we settled into the sounds of our groans and moans becoming louder.  

Loki broke the passionate flow of our mouths, carrying his lips down to the left side of my neck, where his teeth came out to join in on the feast of my flesh. I capitalized on this moment; wrapping my arms over his shoulders while I pulled in as much air as I could to sustain the grinding of my hips onto him. 

He switched to the right side of my neck, his intensity not flickering for a second in any shape or form. His jaws worked over me with the same ravenous manner; sinking his teeth and lips deeper and deeper into me before sweeping his warm tongue over the spot where his teeth had been.

I slowly started to bring my hips to a halt. “It all feels better now Loki,” I moaned into his ear, “You can now move as you like.” I happily informed him. It was not a lie nor was I faking the new sprouts of pleasure that I felt. Somehow the spikes of pain developed into flutters of gratification.

Loki’s mouth departed from my skin, triggering a sigh to slip from my lips. His face came into view above me; his eyes bright with a new wave of excitement, but it was clear from how tightly his jaws were clenched, that the nerves hadn’t left him yet. With a simple nod, he swallowed, “I would not be too rough, I swear it, my love.’ 

I smiled softly at him, pulling him down for a sweet kiss. “I know that you would always be considerate towards me, Loki.” 

Keeping his eyes stationed on me, Loki sailed into me. Again and again and again. 

I wish I could have held our stare as intensely as he did, but with each drag of his hips the pleasure continued to out balance the pain and for the first time I felt my appetite for Loki beginning to be satiated. With my eyes closed, my mouth and my legs opened, I thoroughly relished in this moment of finally having the ability to let my husband love me in the way that he wanted to. 

My nails took root into Loki's back and my thighs instinctively opened wider to receive as much of him as I could. When the rhythm of his hips progressed from a slow, even pace to quick beats, I could no longer control myself; the more he made love to me, the more of him I wanted. He is the one. The one I trusted, the one I shared my heart with and he in return broke down some of his walls to let me in. It required a lot of time and discipline, but in this juncture of ultimate intimacy, Loki and I were finally one. Opening my eyes, I got a blissful view of my husband; his eyes closed while throaty moans flowed freely out of his chest. “I love you Loki,” I heaved out in between his thrusts. 

His hips calm down, gradually rocking into me now. His eyes lingering on my face, absorbing all of my features while I floated in the mesmerizing emerald waters of his eyes. “I love you too, sweetheart.” He panted. One of his hands clasped around the flesh of my hip while the other propped him upright over me. Picking back up the pace a little, Loki rolled his hips into me, triggering my back to arch, bringing my chest to be pressed into his and then his lips fervently collided with mine. 

I knew in theory that sex was the best physical activity that humans could ever experience and in this divine moment, my husband was proving every sexual scientific discovery one hundred percent right. 

Loki’s lips left mine to fiercely fasten around my left breast, sending electrifying pulsating shivers throughout my entire being as he moaned into my soft flesh. “You feel glorious darling,” he exhaled, his mouth clamping down on my other breasts while his hand messaged the other that his mouth was just on. 

“Please don’t stop Loki,” I grabbed a handful of his hair as I pleaded with him. He was spreading this insurmountable amount of pleasure within me and I wanted to be completely overtaken with it, to be completely overtaken by my husband.

“Never.” His teeth traveled up to my neck, his bites beginning to match the pumping of his hips within me, sending shots of pure pain mixed in with the pleasure vibrating through me. 

His thrusts not only got faster, but deeper. It felt as though they were pulling the moans straight out of my lungs as they escaped me, each one being louder than the last. Raising my hips, I met Loki’s movements as best as I could. Another build of pressure began growing between my legs, though this time it didn’t feel painful. It brought with it a sense of expectancy, unlike the balloon, it felt like I should want to experience the impact of when this tension snaps. 

With the dam finally broke, I was exploding all over Loki and gripping every inch of him at the same time. To such an extent that my eyes were rolling to the back of my head. My hands firmly grabbed onto his shoulders, his moans overflowing in my ears as he steadily rocked into me. When my walls began clenching down on him, I heard him hold his breath and felt his hands tightening around my waist. After a few spirited pumps, I felt him throbbing within me as met his own release. Filling me with his love. 

Closing my eyes, I focus on the sounds of our ragged breathing, no more controlled breaths or holding in air. Now we were both gasping for the oxygen that our bodies so desperately needed. Pressing a light kiss onto my cheeks, Loki settled on my chest. No doubt hearing the backflips that my heart was doing in response to the exhilaration of us finally making love to each other. 

I didn’t move, nor did I want to, instead I combed my fingers through my husband’s hair, letting us marinate in the afterglow of us consummating our marriage and making it official; that our hearts and our bodies belonged to each other forever. 

“Wow,” he said into the silence, making me blush. 

“Wow.”  I repeated. I did not have the words nor the train of thought to properly produce a sentence to describe the heavenly experience we just had. He raised his head up towards me and I planted a long kiss on his lips. When our lips parted, Loki started to cautiously withdraw himself from inside of me, but I stopped him. “Stay in me for a few more minutes, I like how you fit in me.”

“Sweetheart, you’re still gripping me really tightly with that treasure down there, do you know that?” He softly asked. 

I blushed at his inquiry, of course I did. With how secure I was holding onto him I could feel every breath that he took. “I can’t help it,” I brushed my lips over his forehead. “You’re my puzzle piece Loki.” I kissed him, “I’ve been missing you.”

The affection glistened in his eyes as he nodded at me, lowering his head back down to lay on my chest.

Ready for the next part? Chapter 2 - What Exactly Had I Done?

[luckytohavebucky]

My Review of Thunderbolts*...

...Spoilers Ahead...

This is a blanket I got which is needless to say very comforting because Bucky.

...I Mean The New Avengers

B is for Bucky (and the closest where I didn't have to strain my neck, but I also sat in the exact middle).

So, the 1st thing that becomes apparent very quickly is basically every form of merch and or promotional material for this film is a complete lie because not only does Taskmaster literally get killed by Ava (Ghost) in the maybe the beginning 5 or 10 minutes, but every scene mentioning anybody not being a hero doesn't include Bucky or otherwise really was implied to 1 degree or another that it didn't apply to Bucky since of course Bucky is and has always been a hero no matter what anybody assumes.

The 2nd is that... ahem, The New Avengers, is unlike any other MCU movie, maybe any cinematic consideration really; it's just... The closest I can compare it to of all things is Tyler Perry's style, where things can be ridiculously hilarious in 1 moment then shockingly somber in the next, like, it is jarring, and yet somehow it totally works, but what Florence said is also true; it definitely has A24 vibes, and I agree somewhat with those who say it's relatively comparable to the Guardians of thd Galaxy, but the overall like atmosphere (no pun intended) is different; it really goes from practically slapstick, to like straight up horror territory, then rounds out to mostly general silliness in the visual credits/post credits scenes (the 2nd of which shows the Fantastic 4 indeed making it onto MCU Earth 616 via their ship which is actually not funny, just fun and really cool, but undoubtedly the best part is Bucky, and Bucky's hair, which rivals its fabulousness even in Avengers Infinity War and also is not exactly funny, along with Bucky in an actual superhero suit which was weird yet made me wanna cry a bit 'cause like, he's the only person that blatantly changed his overall style so maybe he chose that and is ready to like embrace whom he is); this has also been the only non R-ratedMCU project that blatantly mentions meth use, yet there's that overall sense of hopefulness, togetherness, the importance of family in whatever form that takes, and teamwork throughout, with plenty of "fireside" moments; this is very much classic MCU, no mistake about that.

3rd is... uh..., well, obviously okay obviously my favourite part of The New Avengers (yes, this is how I'm referring to it from now on) is Bucky, but I was fully prepared to not care about any of the other characters save for maybe Ava and Alexei, except that didn't happen, and I even love Yelena ('though she is my 2nd to last favourite next to US Agent who has somehow become even worse than he was during The Falcon and the Winter Soldier); I mean... It's not her fault Marvel Studios ended up so-called short-changing Bucky yet again or that she's so overly emphasised in practically everything leading up to what is ostensibly a team movie, so yeah, everybody is great, including Bob who is objectively the most tragic (I mean... imagine being all-powerful but having to hold back instead of helping as much as you want to because the literal dark side of you is gonna manifest as a sentient also all-powerful menevolent entity that would off everbody to "even" things out) yet is also in a way inspiring, and, I gotta say, relatable, which those last 2 considerations specifically applying to the whole team in a way or another, particularly Bucky, and make no mistake, Bucky is always the best.

4th the only range I feel wasn't exactly necessary was there waa still a bit too much about Bucky in any way being responsible for what happened while he was imprisoned by Hydra, 'cause I mean... I get it already, Bucky thinks he did those things even though he 100% shouldn't, so unless that's leading anywhere... It really isn't as bad as it's been, however, and I do gotta say how Bucky actually makes a joke (and smiles no less) about that time which really seems like quite a breakthrough too, even 'though it doesn't change the fact there's a gratuitous scene where Bucky is made to supposedly be nothing without his metal arm, just... fine... it happened, but there was absolutely no reason to show it so pointedly like that, if at all, let alone to make it in any way seem like under different circumstances Bucky couldn't have still easily enough fought with 1 arm had that been necessary, still everything else fits very well within the plot and overall dynamic, but a little like aside is that I know MCU trailers are notorious for showing scenes that aren't featured in the movie itself, however, The New Avengers may take the cake, so to say, far as that, and I'm really wanting them to be included in the extras or maybe even a director's cut, particularly that full what appears to be bonding moment with Bucky and Alexei.

5th leads to that this has become 1 of my favourite movies (in fact I have to reevaluare my top 5, 'though I know Avengers Endgame still holds the number 1 spot, like); it is completely unexpected yet exactly what is should be, oh also the music is great, and yes, most importantly, there is plenty of Bucky (not that I can ever have enough of Bucky).

[elisysd]

23. Cause space is just a word made up by someone who's afraid to get too close

Masterlist - Previously - Next

Please note that some parts of this chapter below the cut might not be suitable for an underage audience. Thank you.

Chapter soundtrack: Close - Nick Jonas, Tove Lo

After the proposal, they all gathered in a pizzeria that Charles had fully booked and privatized for the occasion. Everyone was invited, from Charles' loved ones to friends and drivers. Needless to say that the restaurant was crowded. The music was loud but not as loud as the laughter. Champagne was circulating for all the guests but for the drivers that had to be completely focused for the free practices. But still,it didn’t prevent them from having fun. Romy had forced Kyle into dancing with her in the middle of the room. He was spinning her around until she had no balance anymore and he pulled her against his chest, slowly swinging to the rhythm of the music. Julia was laughing with Louis to something their uncle Arthur had just said. Lyanna and Charles were both in an animated conversation with Elijah and Martin. Ludwig was moving his arms in stupid circles as he was talking to Percy, Leo and Lucas , probably explaining something related to racing as the other boys were all involved in different motorsport categories. As for Ethan, he was alone, in corner observing all the people he got to know for years, enjoying themselves while he was sipping on his orange juice, feeling like an underage kid.

He never thought proposals would made him so emotional, but truth was it did. Charles was like a father-figure for him, in a different way his dad was. Always there to support him and cheer him up after a bad race. Always a nice word for him. And Ethan had an immense respect for the Ferrari Team Principal. His eyes fell on his mom and dad, quietly enjoying some peace and quiet with Lando and Lily. His dad had his arms around his mom’s shoulders and she was comfortably resting her head against his chest. An intrusive thought popped in his mind as he wondered if Julia and himself would look as cute as them. Thinking of her, he found her in the crowd, she was not talking to Louis anymore who was still with his uncle but in the meanwhile had been joined by Percy. She was talking to Martin, a drink in her hand that definitely didn’t look like the kid’s drink Ethan was on. It was so loud that he had to lean in so she could hear him and he couldn’t help the pang of jealousy on his heart.

He didn’t notice straight away the heels clicking next to him and the tanned hand in his field of vision.

“Verstappen.” Daphne said in an annoyed voice after ordering another drink.

“Daphne. Long time no see.”

“I would have rather kept it this way, believe me.”

She played with her earring while contemplating her drink before she looked up and followed Ethan’s gaze.

“She is my friend. Julia. She once looked out for me, it’s my time now.”

Ethan sighed. He wasn’t expecting Daphne to show up. To be perfectly honest, he had kind of forgotten about her. Sure, he had very vague memories about her and the holidays in Greece but that was about it. He never thought she would still hold a grudge after what he had done a few years ago. He was young and stupid, she couldn’t hold it against him.

“I don’t want her to go through what you’ve put me through.”

“Come on Daph’, we were kids. Water under the bridge, no?” he sighed.

“I don’t want her to feel used. And I know boys like you. All you do is lie, and cheat and use girls for your image and reputation. And it’s not fair.”

“Don’t you think that maybe, just maybe, I care about Julia? That I’m not the boy I was almost ten years ago?”

“Guys like you don’t change. And sooner or later she will see it, I’ll make sure of it. ” she said, obstinately.

She was starting to get on his nerves. Firstly Martin and his proximity to Julia, now Daphne and her judgemental comments. He put his drink back on the counter with more strength than necessary and looked at her deeply in the eyes.

“Listen to me, and listen to me carefully, Daphne. I don’t care about what you think of me or of my relationship with Julia. You can hate me all you want, I don’t give a fuck. But one thing I won’t tolerate is you poisoning Julia’s mind in hopes to tarnish my image. You don’t want me as your enemy, Daph. So let us be. I make Julia happy, that’s all you should care about.”

“Do you? Because, it’s not you she is laughing with or seems close to.”

With one last glare, she left him alone, going back to the party. Still, her words stuck in the back of his mind, carrying more truth than he wanted to admit. Had he really change? After all he was using Julia for his image, having this committed image was reassuring to the sponsors that were now more willing to invest in the team knowing their names wouldn’t be associated to scandals. He just didn’t think feelings would get thrown into the mix and that his heart would start to beat faster when she was around. But he couldn’t forget how he tricked her into starting this with him, how he almost blackmailed her. It didn’t make him a better man, no matter how hard he was trying to convince himself he was one.

His gaze lingered on her and Martin. They looked close, that was true. She looked happy, carefree, her hand on his shoulder as he was showing her something. She looked beautiful, ethereal. Her red dress hugging her in all the right places, her red lips so tempting, her hair falling in waves on her back. And Martin that always had this soft look on his face when she was around, the glimpse of playfulness in his eyes, the way his body always leaned to her when she was near. They would make a pretty couple, he could make her happy. And that was killing him inside.

Julia was indeed truly happy. Everything had worked out the way she hoped it would, her dad and mom looked even more in love than before and she never thought it would ever be possible, everyone was having fun and she could finally relax and enjoy herself. She had drunk a bit too much wine to be slightly lightheaded. She was going from guests to guests, exchanging a few words and thanks for coming, before sitting down in a calmer area. She removed her heels and closed her eyes for a brief moment before feeling movement next to her and noticed Martin.

“That’s an amazing party.” he said, smiling at her.

“You can’t have an amazing party without amazing people.” she shrugged.

“You all seem so close, like a big family. I wish I could have that, one day.”

“You are family. You are part of Ferrari and my dad considers everyone working there as an extension of his family, so… you’ll always have your place around the table.”

He looked at her and she swore she could see his emotions in his eyes, as if he wasn’t expecting her to say something like that.

“It means a lot, Julia.”

“It’s not because I don’t reciprocate your feelings that we can’t be friends and… I’m not sure I’m supposed to say anything but we are going to see each other a lot in the next few weeks and I don’t want things to be weird between us. I like you, Martin.”

“Can I have a hug or is it off limits?”

She didn’t let him answer as she put her head on his shoulders as he got closer. They spent a good amount of time talking and laughing and Julia had to admit, she missed this close proximity. She missed his friendship and she hoped that no matter what, Martin would be able to set his feelings for her aside, for the sake of her mind.

She forgot how easy it was to talk to him, how good it felt, how natural and she was even more happy when Louis and Percy came to them, Percy saying how Martin was his favourite driver and how he hoped that next year he would have a real chance to fight for the championship. As for Louis, he wasn’t talking much but observed Martin before taking place, next to his sister and whispering to her hear how Martin had the same look that her dad when he was looking at her which made Julia feel guilty.

The two teenagers talked a bit with Martin, asking him questions after questions which he was happy to answer, no matter how silly they might sound. Julia found it cute the way he was acting with them and how he answered seriously despite the obvious will of the kids to embarrass him .

“You are a natural with kids.” she said.

“I love them. Your brother is something. He is cute. He seems shy, though.”

“His social skills are not as on point as ours. That’s it.” she answered, a bit defensive as it was always the case when someone was mentioning her brother.

“I’m not saying it as a bad thing. My sister is a bit of a loner as well. Louis reminds me of her. I have pics of her, do you want to see?”

She nodded and he took his phone out of his pocket and proceeded to show her every single picture he had of him and his family, not forgetting to tell her the story behind each of them, until one made her pause. It was still Martin and Georgia, on a boat during what seemed to be a very hot day but they were not alone. A pretty brunette was leaning on him. They seemed close, intimate, even.

“Who is that girl?” it was none of her business, she knew that but still. She wanted to know.

Martin didn’t say anything and looked at the picture, his thumb slightly sliding on it.

“Cecile.” he answered, with a stern voice.

“Ex-girlfriend?” she assumed so if she was referring to the way he had replied to her.

“We can say that like that, yeah.”

She didn’t ask anything else. He didn’t seem to want to talk about it and she didn’t want to force him. She excused herself, saying that she needed to mingle with other guest and went to the bar to order another drink. Ethan was there, brooding, something that was quite usual these past few days.

“Having fun?” he asked and she could feel how he wanted to rile her up. He had seen her with Martin, she was sure of it, but knowing that it pissed him off flattered her.

“A lot. Not you?”

“I do. A lot.” he nodded his head towards his drink and Julia couldn’t help but laugh.

“Stand on the podium this weekend and you will have the right to drink something stronger.” she nudged him in the shoulder and as she was about to leave, he took her hand and pulled her against him.

“Don’t go back to him.” he whispered in her ear, making her shiver.

“I wasn’t about to.”

“Perfect.”

He released his grip on her and let her out of his sight.

She felt hot, so hot. She didn’t know if it was because, she felt so happy, because of the alcohol or because of Ethan or maybe it was all of that, but she needed some air or at least to be alone, just the time for her to get a grip. She avoided Romy that wanted to pull her in the middle of the room for a dance and her mom that wanted to thank her again, and headed for the bathroom. She splashed her face with cold water and took a deep breath to calm her down. When she felt better she left and was about to go back to the party when she felt two hands gripping her waist and pulled her against the wall. She was about to scream when she recognised two ice blue orbs and suddenly she forgot why she even had to go to the bathroom in the first place.

“Do you know how crazy you drive me? Totally insane?” Ethan whispered in her ear, pressing her even harder against the wall. He didn’t want her to go back there and to mingle with other people. He wanted to stay there with her, his body against hers, away from everyone and everything.

“The good kind of crazy, I hope.” she laughed in his ear. She was slightly drunk and seemed to have let go of all her inhibitions. It was risky, Ethan knew it. The last time she had been in this state, in his arms, she had confessed her deepest fears and secrets to him.

He felt her arms around his neck, pulling him closer to her. He slightly avoided her face, resting his face in the crook of her neck, his breathing shallow. He could feel her nails slightly scratching the back of his neck as she was playing with his necklace. Her hands were so cold. Why were they so cold? It was making him shiver.  He wanted nothing else but to take them and put them under his shirt, where his heart was beating fast, to warm them. He could feel her breath in his ear and her red lips brushing against it. It was too much, way too much. He should back off now. But he found it so hard to do so. Everything in him was screaming to stay, to taste her, just once. He put both of his elbows against the wall in a desperate attempt to stabilize himself without caring that he was crushing her body between his and the wall until she let out a small gasp as he felt her breasts against his chest. The sound sent a wave of warmth mixed with pent up desire down south without him being able to do anything about it. He should feel ashamed but he was not. He was past that. He didn’t care anymore.

She had consumed his thoughts tonight. Her and her red dress and red lips and long wavy brown hair and blue-green eyes. Her and her laughs and her voice and her smiles and everything in between. It was her. Her, her, her. And if she had been sober he would have taken her right here and there. In the middle of the corridor. And someone could have walked in on them but he wouldn’t have cared.

But here they were. He nuzzled his head in her shoulder not resisting kissing the little bit of skin that was on display. So tempting. So wrong.

“Ethan…” she said in a voice that was betraying everything she was feeling.

“Julia…”

“I want you. All of you.”

Think with your head, Ethan. Not anything else.

“I can’t, Joolsie.”

“You can’t or you don’t want me?” she insisted.

“I want you. So bad you have no idea.” he confessed.

He knew she wouldn’t remember the conversation anyway, there was nothing wrong to admit it. He felt her hands moving from his neck to his arms and his chest, until they wandered even lower to the hem of his jeans. He didn’t dare to move, waiting for her next move. How far was she willing to go? When would she back off? Would she? He wanted to know. She slowly and shakingly let her fingers go under his shirt, tracing the lines of his abs and he felt his breath getting caught in his throat. Her lips started to travel along his jaw. In a desperate move he threw his head back giving her access to his throat. He felt her going from left to right and right to left before settling right where she could feel his pulse beating fast. The softness of her lips made way to the sharpness of her teeth and the roughness of her tongue and this time, it was him who let out a moan that looked like a cry for help.

That was the reaction she silently prayed for, an invitation to keep going. Maybe it was the alcohol that was helping her but tonight, she felt like nothing could stop her. She could feel him against her thigh and she had to admit, it was flattering knowing that she had this effect on him. Her. Not anyone else. Just her. She was burning. Completely burning and she didn’t want the fire to stop. She wanted to keep it alive. If he was the kerosene then she was a dry forest. The more she was near him, the more she was burning. Her hands still wandering along the lines of his muscles, her mouth still busy driving him crazy, she set a leg between his as she started to rock her hips against him in a hopeless way to relieve the tension.

“Fuck, Julia.” he groaned as he put a hand around her waist, the other still against the wall near her head and started to join her movements as if his hips had a mind on their own. He pulled her even more against him, earning another moan from her lips as he could now feel her nipples, hard against his chest.

“Ethan…” she sighed.

He felt like a teenager, unable to control himself. He had to stop but oh feeling her against him, moving against him, in total sync, it was heaven. And it was stupid, they were in a corridor, fully clothed looking like two kids that were discovering what desire was. He felt like being thirteen all over again and trying to discover how his body was working and how to control it. He was not an animal for God’s sake. And here he was, humping like a dog against a girl completely drunk because he wasn’t able to control himself anymore. He felt so dirty.

“I’m sorry, Julia.”

It took everything in him but he finally let go of her and ran away to the closest bathroom, leaving her gasping and shaking, wondering what had just happened.

When she woke up the next morning, her head was pounding and shame was all she could feel. How would she be able to look into Ethan’s eyes after what had happened the night before in the corridor? She hoped he wouldn’t say anything. It has been a spur of the moment, all this tension they both were feeling had to eventually come out and now she only prayed that they both could move on. but if she was honest with herself, all of this only left her with the need of more.

Today was the day and she didn’t know what to feel. She didn’t know how to dress either, she was supposed to wear her team attire but maybe she could arrive to the paddock in a more neutral outfit? Maybe she could match with Ethan, that could be cute? She was about to call Romy for help when someone knocked on her door. When she opened, Ethan was there, looking as good as ever.

“Morning. I wanted to go over the last few details before heading to the paddock.”

She hated the professional tone he was using with her, as if nothing had happened, as if whatever was between them was purely business. Did he feel nothing, after yesterday? Could Daphne be right and she was just another girl on his list? Did all they have shared meant nothing? She wanted to scream those words at him, demand an answer. But who was she to do that?

“I… I was thinking we could have matching outfits? Or is that too much?” she asked hesitantly.

“Dress however you want that’s not important. Ashley wants us to hold hands and to look close to give people the feeling we love each other. Which shouldn’t be hard since photographers sold pictures of your mom and dad proposal and we are on them. People already know we are together, today will just give an official confirmation.”

He was cold. Really cold. Not the Ethan she knew and had learned to like. He was back to his old facade, one she thought he would never wear again when she was around. Not knowing how to react, she simple nodded.

“Perfect. I will be waiting for you in the lobby, then.”

And without adding anything else, he exited the room, leaving her once again wondering what she had done wrong.

Monza was always a special race. Italians supporters were crazy and the vibes there were immaculate. It was always a sea of bright red and yellow wherever they were going. But as Maserati and Lamborghini had their factories not so far away from there, it was not unusual to see navy blue colours popping here and there. The media attention had also been more present these past few years and Julia was not surprised to see journalists and photographers coming to them. Ethan got out of the car, flashed a bright smile to them and opened her door to find her completely frozen, like a doe in the headlights.

“Joolsie? Come on, let’s get you out of here.”

“I didn’t think there would be so many people.”

“I thought you were aware of that when you said that we should hard-launch in Monza. It’s too late to go back now. Come on, I have places to go.”

He took her hands and pulled her out of the car as she crashed against his chest. She heard him say to the photographers to make way for them before she felt his hand gripping firmly hers as they walked to the paddock entry. Inside, it was a little less crowded. Not many people were interested by the free practices but still, they had to pretend. They didn’t even have made an official post that social media were crazy about them. They were the new power couple, they were cute, they looked so in love, they looked so happy, they were perfect and she wondered how people could draw these conclusions based on some blurry pictures, without knowing them. Because if they did, they would know it was fake, that she didn’t look happy even if she had to admit that they looked cute. It was definitely not how she wanted this hard-launch to go. She thought it would be easy, that since they got along it would all run smoothly. But the shift in his behaviour was so sudden that she had not had the time to adjust. Fortunately, it was only Friday and she still had the whole weekend to learn how to fake being happy and in love.

But as if her day couldn’t get any worse, as soon as she arrived in the Skoda garage to change her clothes and start her work, she was intercepted by Wilhelm who asked her if she had a minute. They needed to talk. She went in his office and as he closed the door, she understood that it was no good.

“Ethan Verstappen?”

She opened and closed her mouth, not knowing how to answer.

“You understand that it’s putting the team in a delicate situation, right Julia?”

“Excuse me, but… I failed to see how my private life is and my work life are related.”

“One could say that it could leave to a breach of data privacy, or possible conflict of interests. That’s bad, Julia, really bad.”

She gulped and somehow she knew what was about to happen. She closed her eyes, waiting for the final blow.

“We can’t keep you, Julia. You are a liability. It’s too risky to have you here. You don’t give me any other choice but to fire you.”

Author's note: Well, well, well... the tension is slowly breaking and the temperature is rising heheh... What do you think will happen next? Let me know your theories, I love to read them.

Don't hesitate to leave a comment or an ask, as well as reblogging and leaving a like. It helps a lot for the story to find its audience. I also have a taglist for this story, so if you want to be added so you never miss a chapter, let me know.

Taglist:

@herondalism @aundercover @musingsbyshreya @karmabyfernando @reengard @mycenterfold @smoooothoperator

[rustyvanburace]

you know I gotta suggest Navarre for the character ask! and asahi if you’re feeling up to it :^D

Thank you so much!

favorite thing about them: I love how much PIZZAZ he adds to the early game! How can I not like a character with such a flamboyant, demanding personality whose very presence is enough to make everyone react with shock, contempt, laughter, and awe? Navarre is an ass, but a necessary ass to carry the early narrative and add so much excitement to it. I cannot help but giggle to myself everytime he appears. AND THEN, all that character growth in IVA towards becoming a better, more self-aware ghostie. Ohhh I love he so muuuch~

least favorite thing about them: Definitely the unnecessary perversion in IVA. Enough said.

favorite line: The "dawdling Casualries" line will always hold a special place in my heart, but I am also really fond of the stuff he says when you speak with him during the training drills in one of the rest spots,

"O-Oh, it's you… I thought you to be a demon. Don't start me so… I've never carried a blade any heavier than a knife before. If Mother were to see me dashing about with such a weapon in hand, I think that she would faint…"

And

"I landed a critical blow when I accidentally tripped… The next quest was much simpler, since as you might expect, money is no object to me. 'Twas actually easier than the first. But the final challenge all depends on one's strength, and that's a field I'm particularly lacking in… S-Someone else may have first place, I care not whom. Merely let this debacle of a training exercise be done with!"

brOTP: Nanashi and Navarre are best BROS!

Bad edit aside, can't forget the actual bros, Navarre and Gaston lmao. I really enjoyed their sibling relationship and it opened up so much insight into their familial life and personal struggles. I'm so so happy they got to rekindle at the enddd, it was so sweet

OTP: Everyone knows that I am the sole resident of the Issachar x Navarre Crack Ship Kingdom!! Idgaf that they've never canonically met nor even know of each other's existence, the POTENTIAL between them is enough to keep me content and well fed! We support random rarepairs in this house!

I also really like Flynn x Navarre too and they're my second fave Navarre ship, for much the same reasons!

nOTP: Needless to say, my NOtps would be pairing Navarre with his brother or any of the IVA kids. Eeeugh. Enough said.

random headcanon: It's something I've been wanting to analyze in more depth, and IDK how much of this is actually canon or headcanon considering, but I very much fancy the idea of Navarre always having close connections with the Samurai seniors and keeping close tabs on the Rite and new inductions. He's very astute with the going-ons in Samurai business and likely has been anxiously watching them for quite some time.

unpopular opinion: I understand that Navarre is a very unlikeable character, and he's supposed to be! But it honestly does get really bothersome seeing how much dismissal, if not outright hate, he gets in the fandom. Navarre IS an important character within the early game! It is his very antics that adds the necessary tension and tone needed to carry the early narrative and worldbuilding. It does admittedly make it hard for me to approach other SMTIV fans because I like this bean so much.

But that is okay. I am perfectly content with those who seek out, stick by, and enjoy my bean musings. :)

song i associate with them: Tbh I'm pretty bad at that sort of question, lol. I don't really have one for him right now, so pass? (Open to suggestions though! I want more tunes to listen to.)

favorite picture of them: SO MANY panels of him from the Prayers manga FOR REAL. He's SO expressive in that and has TONS of good moments!! But I am especially fond of the mini bonus chapter that features Navarre~

Masataka Miura can agree: Navarre can have a little moment in the spotlight as a treat~

Thank you again so much for the ask! I think I've written quite at length here, lmao. I'm a bit tired now and I don't think I can fit Asahi here, but I could post hers later on!

[tsutsumi-kurose]

Yes hello hello!

Here’s my thought process

Tsukasa was manipulated by this entity, he was coerced and then abused in the red house and probably saw god knows what. He comes back home and his mom hates him and his brother seems to be wary and also killed him! He doesn’t like this god. He doesn’t want it around but it’s keeping him ALIVE. It’s letting him be with his family.

All he has to do is keep granting wishes.

Even through death, it sticks to him, like a parasite, and he can’t escape it. He knows the lengths it will go, and he knows how willing it is to kill people just for its own sake. So, he decides to work against it. His brother doesn’t even LIKE the god, so what’s the point of keeping it around? He wants to be destroyed not because he hates himself (well partially) but because it’ll kill the well God too. He doesn’t want needless death. That isn’t his goal. It isn’t what he cares about. He just wants freedom but how is having an entity inside you freedom?

oooh, this is such a sad consideration... the idea that if tsukasa is destroyed it will help amane in many different ways is devastating ): but would it get rid of the god, at least from their lives? if tsukasa's death wasn't enough? will it take his destruction to sever the connection?

this makes me wonder if what the god wants after tsukasa went back is the same as what it wants in this timeline? why was our original tsukasa able to go back? is there some way the god benefits?

this also raises questions about if the god and tsukasa can be separated, through any means other than death, and what the consequences would be. though you make a point that the only way for that to happen may be for yorishiro tsukasa to be destroyed ):

it's also interesting that you mention tsukasa's freedom, bc he seems to value that a lot less than freedom as a general concept... yes he thinks people should be how they want to be, but how does tsukasa want to be, other than with amane? tsukasa gave his own freedom away for amane's... does amane have that now? did he ever?

i do generally think of tsukasa and the god working together, though an antagonistic relationship could maybe answer some questions about tsukasa's actions... for example, tsukasa says he believes humans and supernaturals should be how they want to be... right after making mitsuba into something completely different against his will. i wonder what his goal was there? how do these things fit together? taking mitsuba's mind in exchange for a wish doesn't really sound super like freedom!! so maybe that was to benefit the god as well? was this a necessary step in making their own school mystery--another step in the plan to destroy the yorishiros?

the question of leverage and power are definitely very important to think about when thinking about the relationship between tsukasa and the god. how much does tsukasa "owe" to the god? when does it end? how much does tsukasa care about his own freedom? he doesn't appear to give it much thought at all...

there are things i think tsukasa pursues out of his own curiosity, and i think a lot of what is does is for the sake of granting sakura's and amane's wishes. but the violence along the way may very well be the influence of the god over him!! i do wonder how much of the violence of the red house tsukasa was witness to, and how that affected him. i also wonder how he perceives his own violence; tsukasa is certainly a bit puzzling in his simultaneous curiosity about and disregard for other lives. he wants to know all about them, and believes they should be how they want, but is very willing and excited to experiment with them. it certainly does raise questions about what stems his willingness and eagerness to slice into things and make them into something different! is this perhaps the god's influence? a result of trauma? trauma inflicted by the god directly, or through what tsukasa saw in the red house? the fear of amane dying?

i'm not so sure about the answers myself, but i do think the power the god exerts over tsukasa is an interesting question to consider! it also raises a lot of questions regarding what forms a person's personality, and how characters express and pursue their desires and motivations. i'm really interested to learn more about why tsukasa thoguht it would be bad to go back... and what made him decide it was worth risk... right now it seems his desire to learn more about amane won over any caution he previously exhibited. if the god is responsible for the troubles and tragedies the yugis faced after tsukasa went back, did tsukasa know that they would happen? your theory raises a lot of really interesting questions about autonomy and intention and power.... so much to keep thinking about!