#near death scenes and assholes >> fr

[sungbeam]

𝐜𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐚𝐥 𝐝𝐚𝐦𝐚𝐠𝐞

agent!kim sunwoo x agent!fem!reader

6.3k words, enemies 2 implied lovers?, spy au, angst, action, swearing, depictions of violence/blood/weaponry, drinking, UNREALISTIC STANDARDS FOR HOW LONG SOMEONE CAN BLEED OUT T_T, mentions of murder and death, i think that's the bulk of it?

a/n: requests now closed! omg i actually had quite the trouble writing this one �� but i hope it's still enjoyable!! thanks so much @shakalakaboomboo for ur req <3

There was something about the rain tonight that would make the smell of blood even more distinct. The moment you stepped out of the cab, you were hit by a wave of hot, all-consuming heat, accompanied by the insistent drumming of the downpour. The near abandoned streets tonight were doused in the scent of petrichor, and you blinked the water out of your eyes as you made your way toward the entrance of the building of interest.

Just as you had expected, Chanhee had logged your identification into the system, and your card alerted green with no problem. The man standing guard by the scanner passed you a nod. “Evening, Miss.”

You gave a nod back, sweeping your hand through your drenched hair to get it out of your eyes. “Good evening. Is there a bathroom nearby? I’m kind of new to the building.”

He pointed down the hall, around the corner. “Right that way. Have a good night.”

“Thanks, you, too. Stay dry!” You added the last part with a lighthearted smile, coaxing a similar expression from the guard who no doubt had a long night ahead of him. If everything worked out okay, he would still be able to leave alive. If everything worked out perfectly, then everyone could leave this building alive tonight.

You winced to yourself as the soles of your shoes squelched with each step, the shiny marble floors becoming even more shiny as water dripped down to form a trail to the bathroom. You found the ladies’ washroom right where the man had said it would be and let yourself in.

You saw his reflection before you even saw him. Your heart leapt in your chest, but that slowly came back down to Earth when your brain processed who it was. Eyes narrowed, you went over to the middle stall and enclosed yourself within.

“Took you long enough,” Kim Sunwoo, the bane of your existence, drawled. He stood outside of the stalls, leaning against the sink counter, with his body fully equipped with all the necessary items. He seemed to be fully dry, despite it having rained cats and dogs outside. The suit was dry, his hair was dry. Everything about him was pristine and neat and ready to go—howdy doo.

You glared at the door as if you were Superman with x-ray vision and laser eyes. There was a garment bag hanging on the back of the stall that you swiftly unzipped to swap out your drenched clothes with. “What the fuck are you doing in the women’s restroom, you perv?”

“Well, the only other person in here is you, so I wouldn’t say it was much of a scandal. It’s just you, after all,” he replied snidely.

You shivered as the air hit your cold, wet skin, and you hobbled into the pair of dress slacks that were given to you. You really hoped that Chanhee hadn’t given you a pair of chunky loafers just for “fashion’s” sake this time. (You appreciated his fashion advice on any other occasion, except when you were on an assignment.) To your relief, they were a simple pair of flats, and you dug out a note in the left shoe with Chanhee’s scrawl: Found the most boring, “practical” pair of shoes in the closet. You’re welcome.

“Do you ever worry about sounding like an asshole?” You voiced out into the echoey bathroom as you buttoned up your blouse and donned your suit jacket. “Oh, wait. I forgot that assholes don’t have to worry about sounding like an asshole.”

You could hear his eyes roll from behind the door.

Once you were done, you shoved all your sopping wet clothes into the garment bag and stepped out of the stall to twist your hair up and off your shoulders. Sunwoo eyed you from his little corner. There was a screen propped in one of his gloved hands as he went over the schematics of the building and where the two of you needed to go to retrieve the required target before the auction.

“Are we ready, princess?” He asked sarcastically while you double checked the weapons and tools hidden in certain parts of your clothing. Knives, ammo, lock picks, and a gun.

You ignored his mocking nickname for you. "Do you have the money?" You asked him as you both started making your way to the bathroom door.

"No." He nearly crashed face first into your back from how abruptly you stopped. He frowned. "Can you move—?"

You whirled on him. "We can't go to an auction to bid on an item without money," you said, feeling your pulse rise in your neck.

"We can," he huffed, reaching around you to open the door and usher you out, "if we're not there to bid."

"Since when were we not going to bid for it?" Your head went on a swivel, voice low, as you stuck close to Sunwoo on the way over to the private set of elevators further down the hall. It was awfully quiet in the lobby, save for the sounds of your breathing and footsteps.

Sunwoo passed you his device and reached into his jacket pocket to toss you a card on a lanyard. "Since Changmin and I decided it would be easier to just steal the damn thing instead."

Your head raced as you skimmed through the schematics and plans that Sunwoo and Changmin had come up with. These were blueprints of the auction room, neighboring rooms, and vents. Yeah, chunky loafers would not have done you any favors tonight.

But footwear wasn't the problem. The problem was that half the team had gone and decided on a whole new plan without consulting the other half. You jammed your finger against the "up" button to summon the elevator. "Of course, you would go behind my back and just decide this."

He tucked his hands in his pockets, his expression unreadable. "The director already okayed it. Plus, they weren't willing to give us more money than they approved of."

The elevator doors opened, and the both of you stepped inside. Sunwoo reached over and jammed his thumb against floor forty-two.

You leaned your head against the elevator wall, eyes fluttering closed. You would have throttled the director for not approving of more money being put towards this assignment. You thought it would only make sense since the flash drive that was being auctioned off tonight contained such highly sensitive information. It just didn't make sense.

"If we won the auction the right way," Sunwoo suddenly said as you mentally cartwheeled through about a dozen potential scenarios and concerns, "that would simply put a target on our backs for those who want it. Stealing it first would keep our identities low profile."

You had to admit that his words had some reason to them. You watched the numbers on the elevator tick-tock its way up to level forty-two. "So what's the plan, Oh Mighty One?" You asked, inspecting the card on the lanyard around your neck. It had the same identification as the card you'd used to get into the building, but this one had a special seal in the corner that would no doubt be used to get you into the auction itself.

"You're gonna cut the lights, and I'm gonna steal the drive."

Your head whipped toward him. "You're shitting me. I'm not a man-in-the-chair, Sunwoo."

"Never said you were," he said. "It's just too risky to have us both go for it."

Something creeped into your chest and your fingers clenched around your lanyard. "Don't give me that bullshit," you said, having to pull back a full-on snarl. "Just say you have zero faith in me to my face." It was just like the academy all over again. You could hear his taunts egging you on from across the sparring mat, could envision his gaze cutting toward you with every first rank he received. He was good at almost everything, while you had to haul ass to even get to second.

You were so sick of being underestimated.

He considered you for a moment, but you couldn't look him in the eye, choosing instead to stare straight ahead at the steel doors of the elevator. He opened his mouth to say something, but the elevator slowed to a stop and the two of you had to walk out onto the floor.

The two of you fell into step with one another as you made your way down the hall to the large pair of doors at the end. There were two men stationed on either side, dressed in the typical dark suits and earpieces. Attached to their belts, you noted the shotguns hanging there. If you could get closer, you might be able to identify the model…

"IDs," said the one on the right when you and Sunwoo approached.

You and Sunwoo held your cards face up, and both guards took a device from their back pockets to scan the seals in the corner. When their devices lit up green, they reached for the doors and beckoned you through.

The auction room itself looked cavernous with its wall of floor-to-ceiling windows, ceiling dripping with panels of modern lighting, and pedestals littered about the room like a fancy showroom of expensive black market items. You and Sunwoo stuck together mainly, thankfully not sticking out like a sore thumb thanks to the business smart attire you'd changed into. There were a few people with more luxury branded garments on, but other than that, it seemed Chanhee had hit the dress code right on its nose.

Sunwoo tapped you on the arm with the back of his hand, his fingers subtly marking out the chairs, the second floor railing around the perimeter of the room, and the guarded door by the foot of the stage. "We need a distraction to get in there. Once we get inside, we'll have plenty of time to grab the thingamajig since it's the last on the—"

"Hold on—the thingamajig?" Your face screwed up in incredulity.

"Are you judging? Why are you judging?" He asked, plucking twin flutes of champagne off an orbiting waiter's tray. He handed you one. "Drink this. Act natural."

You rolled your eyes and chugged the glass. While you did think Sunwoo was good at a lot of things, alcohol tolerance was one of the few where you came out on top. Right now, you were going to take full advantage of it because that liquid courage was definitely needed. "You say that like I've never done this before, lightweight."

"Oh, shut up."

You and Sunwoo lingered for a moment, pretending to eye the list of auction items being displayed on the flat screen on stage. According to the countdown timer, the two of you only had a few minutes before—

The lights went out.

A gasp fell over the crowd as you placed your empty glass on a nearby table and grabbed Sunwoo by the upper arm. "That wasn't you, was it?" You whispered to him, making your way toward the side of the room where the back door was.

"Yes, because I can control electricity with my mind," he hissed back at you.

"Everyone, please remain calm—" a man had stepped onto the stage and was attempting to placate everyone in the room. He had his hands held out, an easygoing smile on his face. All of the guards and staff members were holding up emergency flashlights, and a few other guests were beginning to pull out their cellphones.

Yours and Sunwoo's eyes darted from the crowd to the man guarding the back door. To your surprise, you saw the man pause at something in his earpiece, before turning around to enter the door he was guarding.

"Fuck, catch the door," you said to Sunwoo, grabbing the glass out of his hand and shoving him toward the door.

He launched for it, barely shoving his body through the opening before it clicked shit. He grimaced as you caught up to him. "This door is fucking heavy," he said, baring his teeth at you when he noticed you were trying to prevent the champagne from spilling. "Can you put down the damn alcohol, Ln?"

"It might come in handy," you quipped, slipping in through the door behind him.

When the door shut behind you, the hallway was encased in darkness, save for the haunting red EXIT signs above your heads, one at each end of the hallway. You followed Sunwoo's lead since he'd been the one to study the blueprints of this place, your free hand grazing over the pistol hanging from your belt beneath the flap of your suit jacket.

"What the hell happened? That wasn't one of us, was it?" You voiced into the dark.

Sunwoo had whipped out a small flashlight and put the butt in his mouth to hold while he jimmied the opposite door open. "Mm-mm," his answer was muffled, but you knew what he meant. The door fell open a little too easily, and Sunwoo only cocked his head in curiosity for a moment, then he was moving forward.

The hair on the back of your neck stood up when you heard voices echoing from somewhere within this next room. The AC was jacked up to a decently high power here, keeping the room cool and dry for all the items that were supposedly being auctioned. This next room was a labyrinth of shelves, and through them, you could make out the movement of lights slicing through the spaces.

"This feels too easy," you murmured to your partner as the two of you peered through the cracks between shelves.

"Yeah, no kidding," he muttered back. "I think somebody is trying to steal something, too."

"The drive?"

"Could be."

The voices came closer, footsteps shuffling and light swarming through the shelves like visible beams through a thick fog.

You grabbed onto Sunwoo again and yanked his arm over your shoulders. You felt him stiffen. "Act drunk, you idiot," you instructed into his ear, "and when they get close enough, do the thing."

He sent you a look. "The thing? And why do I have to be the drunk one again—"

"Freeze!"

Both you and Sunwoo's heads shot up as bright lights blinded your vision. You couldn't tell how many there were—two? Three? But you felt Sunwoo relax in your hold as he sunk into the role you'd assigned him.

"I'm so sorry," you lamented, holding up the flute of champagne in your hand. "My friend over here just drank waaay too much at the open bar and started wandering."

The lights were nearing. "How did you two get back here?" Asked the same voice.

"The door was unlocked during the power outage! I am so—" Your eyes found the circle shapes of the muzzles of handguns being pointed at you and your partner when they had neared enough, "—sorry. We're just a little lost now."

You squeezed Sunwoo's side as you hobbled the two of you closer to the lights like a damsel in distress. "Just point us in the right direction and we'll be—"

If you didn't know Sunwoo like you did, you probably wouldn't have even registered what just happened. But within the blink of an eye, you felt him leave your grasp, and you tossed the glass of champagne at one of your opponents. "Hey, catch!"

On instinct, the one across from you had to drop something to catch the flying glass of champagne, and unlucky for them, it happened to be their gun. Your foot kicked that sucker like a soccer ball beneath the nearest shelf. You grabbed the champagne out of their hand—thanked them for holding it—then smashed the glass over their head.

Quick and easy, yet your heart was pounding against your chest. What the hell was going on?

When you were finished, you leaned down to pick up the fallen flashlight. Sunwoo was looming over his own opponent with his boot on the man's chest, and he pocketed the spare gun while the flashlight hung from his other hand.

You both looked at each other. "We gotta go."

"I can't believe you made me do the drunk scenario."

"Can you just shut up and focus?"

Navigating the maze of shelving was a lot easier with the flashlights. At least now, both of you could see where you were going without fear of anyone else catching you. But when neither of you found the so-called hard drive you were tasked with retrieving, you were met instead by another door leading out to another unknown location.

Sunwoo dove in headfirst. (Right, he studied the maps. Ugh.) "I have a feeling someone's taken the drive already, so be prepared to shoot."

The next room was a long corridor that sloped downward toward a lone elevator. Creepy.

You scowled. "Like I'm never prepared to shoot?"

His gaze was equally as disgruntled. "Just because you got the highest marks in all of our projectiles classes doesn't mean you'll actually shoot."

That remark was something akin to an arrow to your chest. A muscle feathered in your jaw as he called the elevator up to the floor. "You were the top of class in projectile training; you have a license to kill; and yet, you have zero kills in your stats."

How the…? "I don't have to kill to execute my objective. Those aren't assignments I take," you countered, stepping into the elevator when it opened its jaws for you.

Sunwoo crossed his arms over his chest. "Ln, you didn't even take the gun away from the guy earlier. That is protocol."

"I have a gun—"

"That's not the problem, and you know it." He snarled. He took a step near you, both of your tensions rising, heat boiling between your two gazes, nostrils flared. "Just think about it, huh? How many times could you have made it easier on yourself by shooting your way out of something? You know what I would do to have an aim like yours? It's a fucking gift in this field, Ln. And yet, here you are, too scared to even hold a gun—"

You stepped into his space, got up in his face. "You know fucking nothing about me, so quit acting like you do," you snarled and forced the tremor out of your voice. Your hand fisted at your side, close to the weapon you were cursed and gifted to always be tied to.

His tongue poked the inside of his cheek and you were so close to him that you could measure the length of his eyelashes. "What in hell happened to you?"

The elevator dinged. You'd arrived.

You pulled away, mentally shaking yourself away from this conversation. "Don't start acting like you care now."

"I don't," he said as you both walked out of the elevator into a massive underground parking structure beneath the building. "I just need to know that I can count on you if we're in trouble."

"You can," you answered. But there was a microscopic break there, and you were certain he'd heard it, too. There was a question in his stare—he was never as good with guns, but he could fight his way out of a scenario just as well. You were the right choice out of the two of you for anything long range, but the question was if you could still live up to that one-trick reputation.

The underground garage created the perfect echo chamber for loud noises. You and Sunwoo simply followed the audible cacophony coming from further within the garage. Gun rounds were being unloaded without mercy, tire squeals were shut down by no doubt those same gun shots.

You wiped your hand on your pants, sticky from the champagne from earlier, as you and your partner pressed yourselves up against two columns. Just beyond, there was an active shootout taking place—which side had the merchandise, you weren't quite sure of.

Sunwoo signaled to you in a way you recognized from games of capture the flag at the academy. Two fingers swished toward the men behind the cars closest to him, then for you, the ones on your side. Heart hammering against your ribcage, you could only nod, and enclosed your fingers around the handle of the gun in your belt.

You blindly double checked the ammunition loaded up in your firearm, but it was futile since you'd already checked in the bathroom much earlier. It was loaded completely, and very much ready to fire.

You didn't need Sunwoo to signal, because you seemed to know exactly when the other was going to whip around the stone column and take one person out at a time.

Arm—one down—a leg, oh, was that a thigh?—but there went two off your side, as easy as shooting clay pigeons. Instead of a jitteriness filling your nerves, everything seemed to muffle and calm when you had a gun between your fingers. Like second nature, you picked off people (without killing them) before they even realized their mates were gone.

You would nail them in the arm, the shoulder, the butt, the leg, then duck behind the pillar for cover. Guns had become too easy of a game for you.

You barely even noticed that the others on Sunwoo's side started shooting at both of you.

"Fuck," you heard your counterpart curse as he pressed himself against the column.

The two of you connected gazes, and he didn't even have to ask before you were pulling down the hammer again and taking aim—

"LN—YN! BEHIND YOU!"

Your heart lurched into your throat, and you dove.

A line of bullets buried themselves into the concrete where your head had been, and you winced, feeling the burn of concrete through your clothes.

You rolled behind the nearest car, swearing as you clambered to your knees for cover. Somebody had set up a few cars behind you, ready to take you out with an automatic rifle.

"Sunwoo, you need to cover me," you shouted at him, glancing over your shoulder for his visual confirmation.

He gave a firm nod, already leaping into hand-to-hand action and ditching his gun for his more trustworthy melee weapons instead.

Through the windows of the car, you could just make out movement of the gunman. You crawled over to the other side of the car, tracking the feet and legs you could see beneath the vehicles. You reloaded your pistol, smacking the magazine into place, then pressing the hammer down.

Shots suddenly rained down on you, and you pressed yourself further to the ground.

"Come on, come on," you urged, "reload already."

And when you heard that beautiful sound of silence, you yanked yourself to your feet, pointed the barrel through the window, and shot. You heard the curse, and it was enough for you to whip over the back of the car and smack the butt of your gun into their head. The gunman went crashing to the concrete; you tucked your pistol away and picked up the automatic.

The heft of the gun was an old friend—it sank over you in cold realization… how much damage you could do with this.

With pursed lips, you emptied out the gun and kicked it under the car.

You rushed to line up a shot with your pistol to help Sunwoo who was juggling a fight against two others.

He didn't need that much help, but there was the glint of a knife, and you didn't even blink. The bullet buried itself in one of their shoulders, and Sunwoo elbowed him off his back, shoving the other's face into the car in front of him. He yanked his opponent's hair back and smashed their head into the metal again.

"You got it?" You asked him, sliding over the hoods of cars to get back.

He knew what you meant. Blood ran down his nose and there was a purplish cut on his lip. Sweat dripped down the side of his face as he dumped the now unconscious foe to the concrete. "Yeah, it went flying somewhere over there," he inclined his head down a row of cars, and you gave a nod.

The two of you jogged over in the direction Sunwoo asserted and began looking for the discarded drive.

You straightened after ducking beneath a car, but your eyes caught a flash of someone—your instincts lurched.

"Fuck, Sunwoo—!" You had the time to shove him out of the way as the rounds went flying past your heads and you tackled him.

Something pierced into the skin of your shoulder though, and you felt the bullet rip through your clothes and flay your skin as it passed. Your hand slapped over your arm as you fellz Sunwoo's stabilizing you. "Shit, Ln," he said, grasping your good side.

"It's the guy from earlier," you groaned, feeling the blood begin to pool.

"Huh? What guy—"

"The one I didn't take the gun from in the hall." The regret poured into you as swiftly as your blood flowed out of you. "I'll cover you—just find the damn thing."

He sent you a look, but nodded. "Okay."

You were lucky you hadn't been nicked in your good arm, you thought, as you clambered to your knees and peered over the edge of the car.

There he was, the man you'd smashed over the head with a glass. His forehead was bleeding profusely, but he still stumbled toward you, cocking his gun and firing. You ducked, crouching around the car to get to the other side. Mind racing for strategies, you thought you could easily take him down one limb at a time like the others.

All thoughts went flying out the window though when the man started barreling toward you, teeth bared, like a bull seeing red. You yelped as a bullet pelted the ground an inch from your hand. You ducked behind the car, ignoring the pain in your shoulder to palm your gun and aim.

You heard it hit its target.

But he just kept running.

"Are you serious?" You cursed, then regretting it immediately when he threw himself across the hood of the car to knock you down.

You cried out as your head hit the car behind you, the pain stabbing white in your vision. Adrenaline and fear pumped through you as you fought to keep his hands away from your neck. You even found where your bullet had lodged itself and pressed on it.

He grunted at the feeling, nearly twisting your arm off for that. You were trying, trying, trying.

His gun was gone; it didn't matter. You weren't good at hand to hand.

And your grip on his thick fucking wrists slipped. His hands were around your throat. You couldn't breathe—you thrashed around, smashed your gun against his face. He swept your efforts away, determination pressing his thumbs into the hollow—

BANG!

You saw the life drain out of his eyes. He fell over you, blood and a smoking gun sandwiched between your bodies.

Oxygen rushed into your lungs and you coughed. The realization hit you, a hammer striking against the percussion cap.

You just killed this man. You just shot him, point blank.

Oh god—you heaved his limp body off you, his blood staining your clothing, and you felt like Lady Macbeth, scrambling over blood that would not wash away.

"Yn!" Sunwoo's voice.

You wrestled to your hands and knees. "It's not my blood," you coughed, dry gagging at the sight of the pale body, rigid from rigor mortis.

Your mind was everywhere. Another one dead. What if he had a family? What if what if what if—?

"Ln, come on, you're alive. You can do it."

You were on your feet. There was a ringing in your ears from when your head smashed against the car.

Sunwoo ran over to you and threw your good arm over his shoulder to get you to the car he had broken into. "There you go. Hey, I got the drive. How 'bout that?" He wiggled a slim, black tab—the thing that had caused all of tonight's trouble.

You shook out the orbs dancing in your vision. How hard had your head been struck? "It still feels too easy."

"Don't say that," he groaned. "I just wanna get out of this place."

You really shouldn't have spoken so soon.

You heard the shot before you felt it; then the next one, then the next.

Sunwoo twisted around to shoot three rounds himself, silencing one of the people who had gotten the strength to pull himself up for one last try.

All breath left your throat as your hand reached for your lower abdomen. One of the bullets had gone through, piercing the side of your stomach. It had gone all the way through, back to front, the bullet lodged in the metal of the car in front of you.

You couldn't even see which blood stain was yours.

"Nonononono," Sunwoo chanted as your knees buckled and you started slipping to the ground. "Yn—Yn, stay with me," he urged, laying you gently on the ground.

The pain twisted itself until your eyes watered. You thought you tasted blood in your mouth. "Should've shot them dead like you said," you managed to say.

Sunwoo leaned over you, panic wide in his dark eyes as he held your face between his palms. "Yn, honey, you need to stay with me." He pressed his hands over the wounds opening and you screamed, the sound grating against his ears. He knew it hurt—god, he knew, but he needed to stop the bleeding somehow. Oh fuck.

"I'm sorry I screwed up so many times," you grunted to him. You tasted the iron coating your throat and suppressed the urge to cough it all out. You could barely think with the fucking hole in your stomach, but all you knew was that if he wasn't quick, the shot could be fatal.

"I'm gonna get you out of here." You could hear the resolve in his voice, but the shaky undertone, too. You'd never heard his voice shake before. "Don't apologize." Not until I get you out alive.

He scooped you up and you screwed your face up in agony. Your chest rose and fell rapidly, your teeth clamping down on your tongue to muffle the screams. There was blood in your mouth.

It hurt. Fucking hell, it hurt.

He went through the motions of wrestling the car door open, laying you in the passenger seat, trying to find something to staunch the bleeding on both sides.

The whole time, you kept your eyes on his face, trying to ingrain his features in your memory. The blood from his nose had partly dried, but the cut on his lips made his bottom one even poutier.

You'd never seen him so worried, or scared, with the crease between his brows. You wanted to reach up and rub it away.

"Hey," you rasped, catching his wild eyes. "Stop fussing over me and drive."

He clicked his tongue, eyes darting between your face and the knot he was tying with the jacket he found in the backseat. "Yah," he said half-heartedly, "don't tell me what to do."

He passed you another glance before shutting your door and running for the driver's seat.

As soon as Sunwoo collapsed into his side of the car, the elevator, from which you'd come, slid open. A flood of guards in armor and equipped with automatic weapons flooded out in a tidal wave. You both swore a colorful line of words.

"Drive, drive, drive—!" You urged, breaking out into coughs, then doubling over when the motion only intensified the bullet wound.

"What do you think I'm doing, woman!" He yelled and the tires squealed as he pulled out of the parking spot to make a mad dash for the exit.

Bullets fired at the car, lodging themselves in the metal and cracking the back windshield. You heard the glass shatter, and you reached for your gun to try and knock some of them off.

Sunwoo shoved your hand down. "Oh, no you don't. Save your energy, hot stuff."

It wasn't until he had navigated you both away safely from harm's way that you really let everything soak into your head. Your blood marinated the car seat beneath you, and you could feel your energy being siphoned toward the gaping hole in your stomach. Reality dawned on you faster and faster.

Did you fear death?

The streets were empty; it was still raining. You were right about the hot rain—it made the blood scent bolder.

Sunwoo made a turn onto a street, and another, to take any lingering tails off.

"I killed someone tonight," you voiced out into the quiet car amongst the humdrum of rain. It drizzled in through the shattered back windshield and onto the backseat.

"It's okay, Yn," he said quietly. "You had to."

You paused, swallowing. You inhaled sharply and you swore you were starting to get used to the throbbing all over your body. "You… you were right."

"You don't have to do that. Save your en—"

"No," you said with more force. His mouth snapped shut. "I just—" your eyes drifted closed for a moment, "—I just wanted to get this off my chest."

When he remained quiet to give you the space to speak, you told him, "What you said in the elevator was right… I uhm, I feel like a coward when I can't stomach a headshot anymore. I just… Sunwoo, I hate who, or what, I become when I have a gun in my hands."

You felt him glance over at you. "You're not a monster, if you think that's what you are," he murmured. You felt his hand cover yours where you were holding your injury.

"I've hurt a lot of people," you admitted, eyes staring out the front windshield. "The organization told me to pull the trigger, and I did. Even in the academy, I never felt good enough unless I was hitting a target." It had become a momentary triumph only, until every hit made you sink deeper and deeper into guilt. You had been tearing yourself apart at the seams, and you could remember those moments, seeing the fallen with people who cared about them rushing to their side.

The twisting in your stomach suddenly didn't feel like it was from the gunshot.

"Your record—"

"My record is doctored," you said blankly. "They wiped it when I gave up being a sniper."

He meditated on that for a moment, his teeth biting down on his bottom lip. He winced when he was reminded of the injury there. "I know that I was and have been—not the greatest toward you—and... I'm sorry. I think some part of me just thought it would catch your attention—which is no excuse—but…" His finger tapped on the steering wheel in time with his blinker. "I always thought that you would go far regardless. I thought you'd be recruited as a sniper for the high profile shit."

A smile curled at the corner of your lips. "Yeah?"

He nodded, his own lips pressed together. "Yeah. The best, y'know? And I thought… at least as a sniper, you won't be in the line of fire."

Your chest throbbed. "I still got shot, too, though."

"Yeah, but…" He turned into a barren residential street, no doubt toward the safe house nearby. "They wouldn't be shooting at you, I guess. I dunno. That's what I was telling myself, anyway."

You shifted your head slightly to peer over at him. There was a sincerity to his words that you had almost never remembered hearing out of his mouth. You believed him—you believed that he cared. "Thinking about me in your free time, Kim?"

"You wish," he joked, but it was a weaker comeback.

The house he pulled up to was at the end of a cul-de-sac. It was the standard, cookie cutter suburban house, with its front lawn trimmed and windows dark and lifeless. Sunwoo carefully drove the car into the empty garage for privacy, then ran over to your side to help you out.

You could feel yourself falling out of consciousness with all the blood loss.

Your head was drooping as he picked you up in his arms again. The crease between his brows made a reappearance and with your last bit of strength, you reached up to gently rub it away with your thumb. "Hey… I'm gonna be okay," you whispered to him in the dark and quiet of the garage.

He swallowed, peering down at you. "You better be," he said. "Who's gonna have my back then?"

You smiled since you couldn't laugh. Maybe the blood loss was making you loopy (probably), but you swore he smiled just a teensy bit.

He managed to get you on the couch, and you whimpered at the surface beneath you. He disappeared for a moment, but when he returned, it was with a first aid kit and a phone. "I called headquarters; they'll be here in five," he murmured, kneeling next to you and beginning to peel off the blood coated fabrics.

You hissed, body squirming with whatever energy you had left. "I can't believe I'm still alive."

He huffed and gently applied pressure to the wound with gauze. "The only one who gets to kill you is me. Remember that."

"Yeah, yeah," you panted. "Sew me up or something."

"It's gonna hurt. Wanna hold my hand?"

Your eyes met his. "You're ridiculous." But somehow, he managed to make your heart lurch. Even bleeding out and halfway dead, he could make your heart rate spike.

He gave a shrug as he threaded the needle and you held onto the gauze for the moment. "You know what they say…" his voice softened when you both heard a familiar voice announcing his presence from the front door—Changmin. Backup was here. "Enemies make the best lovers, do they not?"

"Did it take me almost dying for you to think of that one?"

Changmin rushed in with a full kit in his hands and practically shoved Sunwoo out of the way. You bit on your tongue as the newcomer inspected your wound.

Sunwoo leaned over the edge of the couch and grappled at your hand, his other brushing the sweaty hair out of your face. "We're not done with this conversation, okay? You better not die on me."

You squeezed his hand when Changmin began stitching you up. "Wouldn't dream of it."

tbz m.list

permanent taglist: @flwoie @vatterie @seomisaho @hqrana @ja4hyvn @tinkerbell460 @kaaimins @hyunjaespresent-deobi @otterly-fey @zzoguri @floatingpluto @winterchimez @ethereal-engene @gyulfriend @polarisjisung @jaehunnyy @shakalakaboomboo @loveliestfelix @bless-311 @zhaixiaowen @leaz-kpop-life @amourdsr @pxppxrminty @kqyutie @sseastar-main @kxthleen14 @fluorescentloves @mosviqu @justalildumpling @jaerisdiction @super-btstrash-posts @jundundun @http-gyu @mvvnsseul @outrologist @vernonburger @maessseongs @kflixnet @ericlvr

[drpsps]

Random shit I said while watching different saw movies!!! Pt1

Spoiler Warning

Saw - “Adam isn’t THAT fine” (lying right through my teeth).

“Teehee Larry you naughty boy” (was extremely high).

“Y’all their actually gay” (chainshipping bitches)

“I just know if Adam survived he would NEVER stop fucking with Lawrence” (Annoying bf who?).

“My pookie John is so silly!” (Besties hear me out, sometimes the pookie is a crazy old man).

“I hate you Lawrence.” (During the whole “I gotta go get help” thing).

“Adam’s thoughts were “Why is that body throwing it back?” during the scene where John gets up.” (I am crazy).

Saw 2 - “Y’all fuck that kid.” (I’m a hater fr).

“His dad is a fucking dick and I hope he DIES!” (He indeed does not die).

“Amanda you’re so silly.” (She was being crazy).

“I hate everyone but Amanda and that dumb ass kid.” (It was that first scene where someone died).

“Okay okay just can everyone calm down.” (Literally any fight scene).

“Damn HE’S BALD AND TORTURING PEOPLE WITH HAIR!” (Gotta quote a good ole tiktok).

“Shit man’s is beating an old guy whose dying.” (I thought it was funny).

“I’M SO GLAD THE KID SURVIVED!” (Me before the reveal).

“Oh fuck that.” (Me after the reveal).

Saw 3 - “Amanda calm your tits.” (Teehee).

“John what the fuck.” (I think he said some dumb shit).

“Okay bitches calm down.” (Anytime Amanda was beefin with the doctor chick).

“Shitttttt!” (x20 because y’all wtf).

“I thought he was gonna change!” (Dude remained vengeful).

“Well everything is fucked now.” (Amanda montage).

“Girl shut up.” (The doctor chick said something super cunty).

“Yas queen!” (Amanda said something super cunty).

“NOOOO!” (any fucked scene).

“YASSSSS!” (Any good scene).

Saw 4 - “OMG IT’S MY POOKIE BEAR MARK!” (Mark appeared on screen).

“I wonder how they didn’t know it was Mark. The constant side eye was a dead giveaway.” (We were barely a few minutes in and he did it three times).

“My pookie wookie isn’t crazy.” (Mark hoffman is extremely crazy).

“His delulu became trululu.” (Mark casually killing).

“If John is dead, then why would Mark join now?” (Before reveal).

“OOOOOHHHH.” (After reveal).

“Mark definitely listens to slipknot.” (Casual observation and definitely not a projection).

“I would NOT survive a Hoffman trap.” (Bitch rigged everything).

“Oh pookie…” (Near the end of the movie).

“I’m glad Eric died..” (Randomly remembering he’s there).

Saw 5 - “IS STRAHM HERE YES HE IS!” (That’s my genuine reaction when he showed up).

“Perez get your dog on a leash.” (Strahm was being a little asshole).

“Meow.” (Anytime both Hoffman and Strahm are on screen).

“I wanna eat them up.” (Me at Hoffman, and Strahm).

“He’s delulu.” (Talking about Hoffman).

“He’s trululu.” (Talking about Strahm).

“He’s not that bad.” (Talking about Strahm).

“Sorry he sucks sometimes.” (Talking about Hoffman).

“Eat shit asshole, die in a trap.” (Hoffman at Strahm).

“Y’all I’m so cool.” (Me on liking all the apprentices).

“My pookie wookie is trying.” (Me about Hoffman).

“HE NEEDS LOVE!” (Me about Strahm).

“I HOPE YOU ALL DIE.” (Minus Strahm and Hoffman).

“I’m so sorry baby girl..” (Me anytime Strahm is on screen).

“He’s cringe but he’s free.” (Me at Strahm and Hoffman).

“Damn someones salty.” (Angry Hoffman scenes).

“Bro is down bad.” (Strahm investigated Hoffman).

“Y’all this shit is crazy.” (About the traps).

“I’m still mad at hoffman.” (About the trap he put Strahm in).

“Okay what the fuck!” (end of film during Strahms death scene).

I need to watch 6-9 and I’ll make a second post.

I love these films with all my heart and you can definitely tell that my faves are literally every jigsaw apprentice (Including Logan from the later films) and most of the male characters (I.E. Adam and Peter Strahm). I honestly think the first three movies tie in together better than the later movies (seeing as we keep this crazy shit going).

I hope y’all enjoyed reading this shit.

[arttrampbelle]

Honest opinions hour:

Mk9 was actually fan service done well. Minus the shit with shang tsung and sindel,raiden bargaining with a fucking bald ass demon that is quan chi. And kung lao dying and being treated like shit. And liu kang being an arrogant asshole that never gets called out in the narrative outside of towers. But we all should FUCKING KNOW! that tower endings aren't canon! They are best case scenario in favor of the character YOU PICKED. that's the point of towers. (And the fact that nrs got rid of towers said to me they dont give a fuck about their fans. AT ALL. And people are too stupid to see just how fucked up and really bad that is for the game. That's how you know mk has been commercialized. Next they gonna get rid of the violence or blood too,watch as they fuck up so badly. And make it legitimately an official knockoff cheap sanitized version. Ugh gross. Watch as people legitimately dont care and when all the hype goes away....they are left with nothing and nobody. Y'all first clue should have been when they made kuai scorpion. But y'all be a special kinda dumb to not see why that is bad. But i digress.)

Anyways. Mk11 was mid. Not the best. Not the worst. But mid. But now? It's a masterpiece compared to the shitshow that is mk12,aka mk1 2023.

Raiden isn't fucking emotionless. He cares about mortals,and especially his mortals that fight under him and his brother fujin. Raiden is the most human out of all the gods. And yes,he's a god. Not a chump farmer,not a fucking "dEmiGoD" naw. A full blown,non gmo,grade A,can of whoop ass,bonafide,thunder god! Fight me on that! Also raiden has responsibilities but he's sassy and loving. Like your dad figure. He's dad shaped. He's understaffed,underpaid,underappreciated,mortals sometimes take his ass for granted(unfortunately). Again raiden is a sweetheart,no pushover,but not a complete dick. No more than anyone else could be.

Speaking of his brother fujin. Fujin is not some uwu,uke boy. He's not some dude that is helpless. He's ferocious,he's deadly. Mischievous,impish,and not someone you should take lightly. He's not the "nicer" of the storm gods. He's just much as a full can of whoops ass as his brother. If not more so. The only difference between fujin n raiden is raiden has years and eons of fucking restraint and mastery. Fujin dont(or he just dont bother to). Raiden is a guaranteed death if you push him. But he doesn't. You could survive fujin,barely,but evennif you do raiden aint far behind and you....aint surviving that man. But lucky for you these two dont automatically resort to violence. Unless you declare mortal kombat. Then im sorry honey your shit outta luck. May the elder gods have mercy on you,cuz they won't.

Reptile is a fucking lizard man. Not some twink in disguise. (Dude I've seen better human forms that that fr from fans eww nrs. Eww.) And his whole ass species was brought into near extinction,and endangerment by SHAO KAHN. NOT SHANG TSUNG YOU IDIOTS. SHAO KAHN. shao kahn has been fucking gotten rid of his importance in the story and it pisses me off. Shao kahn did a looooooot of work. And nrs erased it and gave it to my man?! Like i love shang but no offense,shang tsung isn't that kinda dide to do that shit. At all. He's better as a behind the scenes guy. Because guess what?....THAT WAS HIS WHOLE POOOOOIIIINT!!!!

Shang is a recurring headache at best and at worst he is only a threat to those who dare disrespect him,challenge him,and or prevent him from getting souls(which he needs to live. Not just for power you twats,no he legitimately needs them to live. He's cursed. And idgaraf what nrs said or says.)

Rain is an actual demigod. And is argus's illegitimate son. I hc the gods and elders gods didn't really gaf about mortals x gods mingling. Argus worried about his worshipers and mortals reactions. Because legitimately he cheated on his wife dalia. And taven n daegon were gonna suffer because of it. Rain's mother was heartbroken and told her son died in birth. And yeah rains whole backstory is fucked. But yeah that's what happened. Basically argus is a dick and isn't well liked among the mortals and gods. (Dont tell jade,i hc she was devote to argus but blinded to the truth. Untill she eventually found out. She was so hurt by this,poor jade)

Hanzo hasashi is scorpion. Always will be. Fight me. End of discussion.

Bi-han was just as a victim as kuai and hanzo. Quan chi is the fucker you should blame. Idgaf if you love hanzo. Dont blame bi-han for quan chi's manipulations. Bi-han suffered really bad. It's not his fault that the narrative still wants to cheapen his character to "eViL bRoThEr" archtype trope. Pisses me off. Bi-han and hanzo should shake hands and make up. Like fr.

Never forgive nrs. Idgaf if they make any new games. Dont buy them. They had many years to get shit right. They screwed up. Just play the old games

I havee many more but I'll leave it at that for now.

[kidfoundonstreets]

i found the shinnie-ass dialogue from homestuck

Page one of shinnie dialogue (dealing with fragments of the self) Page two of shinnie dialogue (avoiding death)

But first: A bit of explanation. because this shit is a bit confusing to me and i've read this scene five times

This scene occurs between Dirk Strider (teenage version of dave strider's brother, not a complete asshole this time around) and Lil' Hal, who is a self aware AI replica of Dirk made by Dirk when he was like 13, who has now developed his own personality. Lil' Hal speaks in the red text, Dirk speaks in the orange. also lil' hal is dirk's glasses

Lil' Hal has almost-near control over all of Dirk's interpersonal relationships, as he's able to chat with all of Dirk's friends. This is the main conflict in most of the first half of the first page, as Dirk recently broke up with his boyfriend, Jake, in a rather. Momentous standoff.

However, as page one of the Shinnie Dialogue is Wordy As Fuck, i'll try and pick out some of the snippets that i think are important

[TT: Because we are. TT: The same. TT: Guy. TT: Stop saying that. TT: I'll snap you in half. TT: Good idea! TT: That's just what you need. More splinters of yourself. TT: Figurative splinters. Literal splinters. Splinters of splinters. It's splinters all the way down.]

I'll basically just say here that all of the final orange chunk of text in shinnie page no. 1 is. what sealed the deal for me to send this ask.

shinnie page no. 2: the final few exchanges (starting with [TT: So I am not being ironic at all when I say. / TT: Please do not do this, Dirk.]) are pretty important to my shinnie point + i like them and they echo around in my head all day long forever and ever

but anyways!! merry christmas!!! have fun, sorry for pushing upon you the burden of homestuck!

shinnie ass but fr this dialogue is intriguing i have a sense of 'what the fcuk did i just read' but thtas proabbay bc i didnt see all the earlier contxt (actually maybe id still feel that. this has that vibe. i like it) okay actually having the context now from syndeys explanation that feels more confusing ok i reread it i have processed it now and am spinning it in my brain ill snap you in half!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! sounds appealing (hes so ill. serves him on a pl;ate a ok) ah yes the ai situations. i love them. refelciton of yourself etc <3 destroying youself etc :3 "i like them and they echo around in my head all day long forever and ever" if i knew them they probably would as well stairng directly at screen

[bethsuglywigs]

top 5 tropes

1. Canon Divergence 

Cross Your Fingers, Be It Fahrenheit or Centigrade, and Warm in the Fire of Us by @pynkhues

I don’t think I need to sell anyone on Sophie’s work because it’s well established that she provides high quality content. fortunately for me, she also likes the same tropes as me so i stay well fed. 

CYF: a post-s2 fic dripping with angst and criminal activity. the scene where rio interrupts beth’s date lives rent free in my head. 

BIFOC: set during s2, rio is sick 😷 and beth plays nurse 👩‍⚕️ ... god tier scenario 

WITFOU: set during s3 (aka brio’s angst era) lets just say... clean like him changed me on a spiritual level  (inspired the forbid blow job 👀)

a song inside the halls of the dark by @mego42

this fic as everything: a road trip, beth committing murder, crafts, several near death experiences, brio sexily not communicating, find my friends, AND pta moms interacting with brio... like what more could you ask for in a sprawling post-s2 fic? a must read imo 

Good Sport by fireinsideforfun

i know you’re all ARC stans so I don’t need to tell you that fiff is a good writer. but what I am hear to say is that Good Sport is a slept on fic (pun intended). brio bed sharing and not communicating my beloved. 

for a moment we were strangers by openhearts

this is fic is iconic for fully embracing beth and rio’s age gap (41 v. 29)... openhearts said cougar rights. but also this fic is a fun little brio playing house fic and i just can’t get enough of it 

I Put A Spell On You (and now you're mine) by @sdktrs12

um hellooooooooooo halloween 🎃 prompts my beloved. 

2. Hate Sex

your monster looks like mine by mego42

this fic is about having hate sex on drugs..... das it baby 🥵

satisfied through the weekend by @septiembrre

the show gave us brio having sex while beth is on a date with her husband (iconic, revolutionary, etc), but Gaby one-upped them and gave use up brio having sex while beth is on a date with the hitman she hired to murder rio... i have to stan 

As Good As This by @riosnecktattoo

wire sex - i simply love betrayal 

Two Shoes by pynkhues

all you need to know about this fic is that brio do a job together that requires them to dance and then hide in a closet together (sexily)... the animosity and sexual tension is off the charts

I Will Collect You and Capture You by @foxmagpie

oKaY..... these clowns 🤡 are really at their worst in this fic. like please have a conversation im begging you (jk keep hate fucking and being angsty). rio fr thinks he can fuck beth out of his system, but all he can do is think about her when he’s with other women. literally down so bad in this one. 

3. Outsider POV/Interactions

Three Drops (an intermission) and If It Wasn't for All the Lights by pynkhues

these two fics inspired my own outsider pov fic... thats how influential they are. other people should NOT be forced to interact with beth and rio and yet... its so incredibly funny when they do. i would sell my soul for some more outsider pov fic i s2g. 

Choose Your Own Adventure by sdktrs12

if you’ve followed me for longer than 30 seconds then you know im a cyoa stan. the concept of beth and rio having to spend time with normal parents makes me insane. and they’re just so horny for each other, but in the woods and thats just so special to me.

listening through the air shaft by mego42

another iconic outsider pov fic. truly the dean pov chapter is incredible. like it was so incredibly big brained of meg to make Dean witness brio coming out of the  bathroom break bathroom together. transcendent really. 

AITA for wanting to stop paying my wife’s “business partner” and yelling at her? by @lemoncupcake

spoiler alert: he is the asshole 

PTA Vibes by greyish 

again i’m OBSESSED with the idea of normal people interacting with brio and being subjected to their insanity. and brio being on the pta together is inherently hysterical. 

4. School AU

delinquents, stunner, and I'll Fall If You Do by foxmagpie

queen of high school aus it has to be said. the high school teacher just JUMPS out and im obsessed. 

delinquents... my beloved... where to even begin? a must read for sure. i love this fic so much it inspired my entire fanfic fanart series. 

stunner: blockt for this one; intentional infliction of emotional distress law suit still pending 

IFIYD: i love two dummies with a requited crush on each other playing spin the bottle   

Both Sides of the Law by @joeyjoeylee

if you’re ever been to law school then you’d know that joey captured it perfectly. its the perfect au setting for brio because only insane people go to law school. thats just facts. this fic made me cry (real actual tears from my eyes) several times. 😭😭😭😭😭😭

QuikGrove University by sdktrs12

a staple in the brio college au category. just two college students having sex and committing crimes like god intended. 

watermelon sugar and Seven Minutes in Heaven by @querenaxx

ws: rio spends this entire fic with his tongue 👅 inside beth and i love that journey for him

smih: the title really says it all. and what im saying is that it needs a sequal as asap as possible.

Jawbreaker by riosnecktattoo

tay does simp rio like no one else... its the longing for me... (also rio sexily plays basketball)

Pre Season by @wakeupflawless

if you follow my main blog then you know im obsessed with soccer so of course a brio soccer au is going to be my bread and butter. they literally want to fuck each other so bad, but also, they want to beat each other on the field and that just feels so right.

Sliding Into Third by @fairhairedkings

baseball rio... das it baby... that’s all i need to say i think

A Special Kind of Business by CaptainCabinets

beth x rio x high school x drug dealing = incredible 

5. Very Brio Specific Sex (i.e. pool table, hot tub, desk etc.)    

Invitation to a Beheading by riosnecktattoo

they literally have sex next to a dead body (🥴)

Say It by riosnecktattoo 

desk sex with a twist bc its at boland bubbles instead of boland motors (cucking is cucking babes)

trade my heart for honey and now use both hands by mego42

tmhfh: antagonistic pool playing leads to fucking on the pool table 

nusbh: desk sex but they make it other peoples problem lmao

Lining Up the Shot  and Part of the Equation by brokensatellites

luts: he bends her over the pool table just like in canon, but its actually sexy

pote: hot tub sex like literally fucking in the hot bubbly water 

Show Me How To Get Offended by FakePlastikTrees 

hot tub sex, sex in the hot tub - its what we deserved but never got

your tongue told me every lie by carrythesky 

desk sex on THE boland motors desk... 😌

Salty Sweet by foxmagpie

desk sex but beth is sucking him off under the desk while hes conducting business 

[eastwoof]

Mod Spit watches Jersey Boys in London and cries about it

Hi, so this’ll probably be the last post for a while until Mod Bubblegum and I become witty enough to come up with more content. So here’s some random thoughts I’ve conjured while watching West End’s production of Jersey Boys because the joy I felt was immeasurable.

Please know all these silly comments are said with as much love as humanly possible. I respect all these actors and the hard work they put into performing this show each night. Any seemingly negative opinions/commentary are in no way meant to bash the actors as they do not reflect their actual talents and abilities. So without further ado…

The Show

The lamppost is so,, big??? Like, it’s huge.

TOMMY IS SHORTER THAN FRANKIE. I REPEAT. TOMMY IS SHORTER THAN FRANKIE.

JOE PESCI IS SO CUUUUUTE OMGOMGOMG HE’S A LIL BABY (I want to smooch him. Don’t tell anyone.)

We got a Bob understudy, and he’s so SMOL. HE’S SO TINY. He’s only like,, an inch-ish or two taller than Frankie?? They fr said “we want uwu Bob or give us death.”

Tommy is so smiley and cutesy. Cocky piece of shit. I love him. I would die for him. (No one can do cheeky Tommy better than Sam Wolf though. I gotta represent.)

I MADE A COMMENT ABOUT A GINGER NICK AND I GOT A BLONDE ONE INSTEAD

Speaking of, Nick makes me want to cry. HE KEPT DROPPING THE JOISEY BOISEY ACCENT. WE GOT A BLONDE BRITISH NICK MASSI. (I miss Mark Edwards)

“MY BOYFRIEND’S BACK” WAS SO GOOD. I WANT FRANCINE’S ACTRESS ON BROADWAY RN.

MARY. HER. SHE. AAAAH

The dialogue is slower. Off-Broadway, they were speaking at rapper level speeds. But it’s good slower! I can actually understand them LOL

(It’s most likely for audio reasons. A lot of the time, the background vocals tended to drown out the lead vocals/dialogue.)

An old lady behind me went “Yeah!” after one of the songs. It was adorable.

There were also two literal toddlers next to me. They were very quiet and polite as the adults yelled “ASSHOLE” on stage.

During “Oh, What a Night!” (“And you are?”) the ✨sexy✨ lady just,, stuck her finger in Bob’s ear?? And then trailed it down his chin and neck??? And then he did a lil gasp and was like, “Booo—hah—ha—oooaaaahhb??~!” LIKE HIS EYES ROLLED BACK INTO HIS HEAD AND EVERYTHING. HELLO?

OKAY SO BARRY? THE HIGH NOTE NEAR THE END OF “OH, WHAT A NIGHT”?? IT WAS SO CLEAR AND GOOD AND BEAUTIFUL. I GASPED.

THERE. IS. AN. ASIAN. IN. THE. CAST. SHE. PLAYS. LORRAINE. (I don’t know if it’s a big deal or anything new or not BUT IT’S A BIG DEAL TO ME. IT MEANS I HAVE A CHANCE.)

Bob (Crewe) and Phil start laughing after the “twisted around her finger” line, and it was adorable seeing them get back into character.

Joe Pesci: “Who wears short shorts! She wears short shorts! They wear short shorts! He wears short shorts! …I wear short shorts—!“

Tommy and Frankie get so close to each other every time they have dialogue together. I’m losing my mind. Leave room for Jesus, y’all.

Scratch that, Tommy gets close to everyone. SOCIAL DISTANCE, BRO.

When Frankie sees Mary for the first time, he gets all lovestruck and distracted by her, and Tommy had to sing loudly to get him back on track. I love it.

Frankie just kept staring at Mary during their dinner. Like he was so n e r v o u s. CUTIE.

Tommy wouldn’t stop smirking throughout the debt scene. Frankie was on the verge of TEARS, and Tommy was being a BASTARD.

Nick’s monologue at a slower pace is kinda… sad? It doesn’t feel funny; I instead felt really bad for the guy. Like, he seems genuinely heartbroken at Tommy’s behavior, and I think that intention is funnier than the actual lines.

Nick: “Hey, I got his attention! Hi, Bob! *sparkle fingers*”

Tommy and Lorraine’s interview??? Geez, Tommy you’re like,,, seriously a douche. Like, I always want to punch Tommy in this scene but here?? I wanted to throw him into the theatre over.

Frankie’s tone was so clear and so good. I love him. (Especially in “I’m in the Mood for Love…” He did it so easily and flawlessly.)

I only just now realized that they use the toilets for the jail scene and that scene only. They have four toilets for a one-minute scene. (Lol The Four Toilets)

When the horn section finally came out, Frankie grabbed his mic and stared up at them like an excited puppy and smiled all huge at Bob. It was the c u t e s t.

Frankie’s dancing during “Beggin’” was,,, oh my gooooood. He was doing spins and tricks with the mic. He turned into a human helicopter. I thought he was gonna fall and die.

They changed the Neil Sedaka line and removed the New York team line at the beginning because the audience is too British to understand.

(I forgot what the Neil Sedaka line turned into, but the team one was replaced with something about Tommy being familiar with Jersey’s prisons LMAO)

Bob Crewe, in the deepest, monstrous voice ever: “PLAY THE FUCKING SONG ALREADY.”

Tommy and Frankie do a little shimmy against each other’s backs during “I Can’t Give You…” I want to pinch their cheeks.

These nerds. They’re all just nerds. I love this show.

Stage Door Things

“Yeah, I’m exhausted! I can’t wait to go home and have some tea and biscuits!” - Luke Suri

Every actor asking how their accent was as soon as we told them we’re from New York.

I accidentally jump scared Lorraine’s actress, and I feel terrible :,)

“This is weird. I don’t really get to do this, haha.” - Andy Smith

Joe Pesci’s actor recognized me because I was seated at the front, and I called him cute, and I wanted to die in a hole.

Love-bombing all the actors because they absolutely deserve it. They’re incredible. I love performers.

And of course, we have to credit…

The Cast

Frankie Valli: Luke Suri

Tommy DeVito: Benjamin Yates

Nick Massi: Karl James Wilson

Bob Gaudio: Andy Smith

Joe Pesci: Joey Cornish

Barry: Kevin Fullinck

Gyp DeCarlo: Huon Mackley

Lorraine: Grace Lai

Mary Delgado: Carolyn Maitland

Francine: Rosie Needham

Norm Waxman: Tom Oliver

Bob Crewe: Joseph Peters

[jrueships]

(Hands you detective au)

WOW!!! OMG THANK U!!!

IWBFIEB im /j of course fr thank u for this ask I've had a detective kinda au in my mind 4EVER.. multichapter pg/kawhi detective au... I won't write it yet because uhhhh looks at mountain of wips... looks away.. but YEA it's definitely a THOUGHT. My hatred of c0ps vs my love for detective aus.... FIGHT!!!

But BASICALLY the idea I have with the detective au is like... kawhi leonard was just some guy looking for a job to support his adopted son, Terance. One day he helped with a crime near his house and badda Bing badda bang! A detective agency liked his 'eccentric' thought process. It's basically a play on monk/Sherlock where detectives find a guy who thinks different than them so they make him do everything basically LMAO.. except kawhi doesn't Want to so everything. Despite being known for his austere exterior, the deaths stack onto him. He really hates his line of work but just suppresses it all deep down. To his quiet dislike, he ends up climbing higher into the forensic ranks due to his knack of solving cases. He gets pushed up from Arson with Kyle Lowry, a funny but kind of sad little fellow who misses his old partner transferred to another state agency, to Vice (AKA drugs) with Paul George.

Paul George isn't your ordinary humbug black and white detective. Though he did carry a pack of cigarettes and a lighter with his own initialed insignia, he only carried it for Style Points and Aesthetic. He takes most his cases with a grain of salt, just glad to be getting a good pay. He shows up to scenes wearing flashy, expensive suits and a cute hat with a bow. His shoes are always shiny and his baby blue corvette (fitted with it's own radio and sirens) is worth more than Kawhi's shitty apartment. He's flashy and shines his badge to all the ladies. A failed actor, He's obsessed with acting like his job is a movie and he the handsome main character.

He's recently new to the job, having moved up to replace Damian Lillard -- who suddenly quit. Paul's vain and jealous of Kawhi having quicker success than him just for 'being weird'. He constantly shoots offhand comments and let's Kawhi know who's the leader in this forced partnership. Kawhi could honestly care less.

I think I want chapter 1 to be them getting to know each other whether they want to or not. Chapter one is pg's big asshole era so it starts off with them getting sent to their first case together by the commissioner. The commissioner gives his complaints to kawhi rather than pg so that gets pg all annoyed. Insert a bunch of sarcastic and biting comments here. This continues even in the car ride, with Pg lowkey trying to flex his flashy accessories and higher authority to Kawhi's silence. Then the car stops at a red light and who do they see but Damian Lillard driving his rinkadink motorcycle. He quit to become a private investigator, saying he won't work with corrupt cunts. He throws Kawhi his number, flips off paul, and tells them Goodluck on their criminal case before speeding off before the light hit green.

This sends Paul back into a spiel, ranting to Kawhi about how Stupid Dame was and how he must be outta his mind. Then he starts putting up dumb ground rules to reestablish his superiority like rule 72 always say I'm right. Rule 56 always tell me I look sexy rule 57 always follow that up with a no homo though rule- You get it. That goes on for a Long while, and when pg is finally done he looks back at Kawhi, who hasn't said a single word since getting in the car, and asks if he has any questions. Kawhi nods and asks "can you turn on the radio."

Pg does. Reluctantly. But only because his voice was starting to get sore from all that talking.

Chapter 2 ... I am still thinking. I have a case in mind for them to solve but... it's a lot to think!

But I really want there to be a scene where they have to chase a runaway culprit but his sprinklers turn on so pg refuses to run through them and get him. So he just kinda points at the culprit's retreating form and barks at kawhi like "gO GET HIM!!! THAT'S MY MONEY RUNNIN OUTTA THE BUILDING, YOU BOZO!!"

And I want there to be a scene where pg and kawhi are scoping out a suspect at a diner so they have to squeeze really close together in a booth and snoop in a dark corner. Pg ask kawhi to light his cig for him (while it's in his mouth that's very important) ... they start bonding a bit. Kawhi talks a little. Pg starts noticing that kawhi isn't this kinda special golden boy detective but just a guy whos trying to make a decent living. He comforts kawhi after he sees a bad body.

I also want a scene down the road where kawhi gets shot and the closest place for treatment is his apartment so pg drives (and kawhi gets blood all over his nice car MAN!! "Leonard I swear you're gonna live and you're gonna wash this SHIT off my car, man!!") him home and kicks open the door to start getting to work on healing that wound. Kawhi is more concerned with not letting Terance see him like this... pg shows his Caring side and is really nice to terance.. gives him his badge to play with in another room. Also hands him his sketchpad he uses to draw the suspects so he can doodle away. Mandatory terance asking if Paul is kawhi's boyfriend. Mandatory Paul dodging the question by saying he has to go help dad-KAWHI. And he does and paul REALLY realizes that kawhi is just some guy who just thinks different but that doesn't make him any better or worse than pg and it's like "oh. Maybe he's not so bad..."

And YEAH. I think I want the end to have a twist. Blah blah they find out the agency is corrupt (probably take money from drug dealing gangs to not bust em all). They both end up quitting detective work to join Damian's private agency to put a stop to dirty work.

BUT YEAH!! Those are my ideas for it!!! Kinda long I dunno!!!! Ummmm ! Yeah! Lmao! Buddycop dynamics have me by the THROAT 😭

[guymaito]

For the ask thing :3:

Top 5 animals? Top 5 fav/comfort movies? Top 5 fav cartoons/shows?

I’m honestly glad to know theres other people including you who actually like Pakku and his character :3 Yes he was a completely asshole at the start but he did change, it’s just that it was so subtle that not everyone saw it

Also random song associations with characters:

Fighter by Jack Stauber reminds me very well of Piandao, Pakku, and Jeong Jeong as their younger selves during the war.

Why do I associate Grace by Lewis Capaldi with Bumi? (the music video tho would give more context to why it might make sense)

Oh Klahoma by Jack Stauber reminds me of Piandao and his overall anxieties for his partners.

Consider some of these songs as sorta song recs? Idk but still :3

1. Giraffes!! the reason why their tongues look like That is cause of extra melanin and to prevent sunburn!!

2. Seals!! there are 33 different kinds of pinnipeds and there over 50 extinct pinnipeds

3. Dogs!! they can only see in shades of blue and yellow, so bright red roses look yellowish brown and lively green grass look dehydrated and dead

4. Crows!! a group of them are called a murder

5. Cows!! they’re actually colorblind, they can’t see red specifically, so male cows, bulls aren’t getting mad at the color, they’re getting angry at the movement

1. The Losers movie from 2010, it’s a action mystery movie about Clay and his team that are a part of an elite US Special Forces Unit and are approached by a mysterious woman to exact revenge on their handler, Max, who betrayed them and just,,,the characters, CHRIS EVANS, jake jensen and all of his kinda weird glory, THE ELEVATOR SCENE, also cougar!!

2. Captain America and The Winter Soldier movie, it’s a action movie, which makes me realize that a lot of my faves are prolly gonna be action something, but anyways, it’s about Steve Rogers, who now lives in the nation's capital as he tries to adjust to modern times. An attack on a S.H.I.E.L.D. colleague throws Rogers into a web of intrigue that places the whole world at risk. Joining forces with the Black Widow, Natasha Romanov, and a new ally, Sam Wilson, Steve struggles to expose an ever-widening conspiracy, but he and his team soon come up against an unexpected enemy. oh my god,,,just,,,the fight scenes, the running scene at the beginning of the movie, steve meeting sam that way, just everything!! this was also my introduction to marvel so in my mind no other marvel movie can live up to this (other than spiderman away from home)

3. Spiderman Far from Home, again, it’s a action movie, i’m not gonna explain this cause the post is getting long, but!! mj and peter!! just,,,all of their scenes!! also jake gyllenhaal!! the fight scenes!! the soundtrack!! everything about it is amazing!!

4. Thunderforce, again, i’m not gonna explain, it’s an action adventure and comedy movie (ofc it is look at the other 3 🙄 /s), the relationship between lydia and emily!! the relationship between lydia and emily’s daughter!! the humor!! the fight scenes!! the soundtrack!!,,,,just everything about is good despite the bad ratings

that’s more like a top 4 than a top 5 but that’s like,,,,all the movies i genuinely like and will rewatch if given the chance and for that where’s a honorable mention: Hamilton (the movie version on disney+ that came out i think nearly a year ago), the soundtrack is amazing, the characters are better, got some funny moments and is mostly historically accurate, like yeah angelica did forget her name cause at the time of her meeting alex ham, she was married to a man named john church (or something church idk) so her last name was church but she introduced herself to alexander as angelica schuyler, not angelica church, so in satisfied she was telling the truth about forgetting her own name, but in the same song she said that her father had no sons even though the real angelica had 3 brothers.

1. Avatar the last Airbender, ofc or else i would have a blog (mostly) centered around it and it’s sequel /s but fr though?? it’s such a good show!! zuko’s redemption arc, iroh’s redemption arc (even though his more subtle than zuko’s) , aang!! love him and his character so much, especially when he gets to be a sassy little shit, sokka and his shit humor and brains, katara, toph, hakoda and HIS shit humor, the fight scene with hakoda (he fights kinda like a waterbender, using his opponent’s momentum against them), bato and his lovely, lovely voice, piandao, aang going ‘how about he get on YOUR back and you can fly us to the south pole’ or something like that to sokka after he complained about appa not flying higher, the boiling rock episodes, hakoda apparently being a good dad but a shitty prison riot starter (love that for him), just!! atla is such a good ass show, im not changing my mind. also!! i like the way they introduced ozai, not showing his face but still presenting him as not only a shit dad, but a shit person as well, like up until book three, we only saw him like, the neck down and in like, a flashback or two (i don’t really remember how many flashbacks ozai was in actually cause it’s nearly been a full year since i last watched it) and that’s it, so it made seeing his face for the first time all the more better cause you was already like ‘what the hell does this shitbag look like’ and then you see him and now ur like ‘oh!! THATS what he looks like!!’

2. The Legend of Korra, again, ofc or else i wouldn’t have a blog (mostly) centered around it and it’s prequel, just,,,,korra’s arc from being hot headed to calm is fantastic but also sad considering the way she went from that to this, korra’s book 1 character!! for whatever reason i really like b1 korra, just,,her design, her hair style (even though she had it for nearly the entire series) just!!! book 1 korra <3, also the entirety of book 1!! just amon posing as a anti bender nonbender despite being a waterbender himself, the scene where tenzin and his kids nearly lost their bending, which would’ve meant that, if tenzin did lose his bending but his kids didn’t, that would’ve meant the strongest airbender would’ve been his 11 year old daughter, the gruesome way to end the season finale episode by doing a murder suicide which was dark as fuck for what?? a kids show??, also the villains in this show!! their good as hell!! the backstory of the red lotus and how and why they were created?? amon and his anti bending?? kuvira and her plan to basically rule the earth kingdom (idk i haven’t finished book 4), unalaq and his spiritual stuff and wanting to become a dark avatar and fusing with vaatu?? also!! the other disturbing scene of korra basically getting tortured near the end of book 3, i mean?? it deadass left her hella traumatized and unable to walk, again hella dark for a fucking kids show

3. The Walking Dead, even though i haven’t finished it or watched in like, 4-5 months, i just,,,the way the presented negan!! practically foreshadowing him the entirety of season 6!! him appearing at the very end of the season 6 finale and pretty much having an entire episode dedicated to him in the very beginning of season 7 (which is why some fans argue he was introduced in s7 not s6 cause of the fact that he didn’t show up until the very end of the s6 finale but had an entire episode with him in it in s7, while others say vice versa cause the very the first time we see him was in s6 not s7), the fact that the walking dead logo was getting progressively more and more decayed as the series go on?? the fact that the WALKERS (the zombies) are getting more and more decayed as the series go on?? dale’s death scene?? shane’s death scene?? negan’s relationship with rick’s daughter?? the fact that this show also has what?? 11, 12 seasons?? which reminds me that i’m still on season 9 of twd

4. Sabrina the Teenage Witch, just,,,salem and his sarcasm?? sabrina’s aunts?? sabrina herself?? just!! everyone is just so fucking funny in this show it’s unreal, specially salem!! a lot of my favorite scenes have salem in them, the ‘are you on a women’s chat room again?’ (or something like that) and salem saying ‘i like the attention’ in response, that one harvey and salem scene that i don’t know how to describe without turning this into a giant paragraph like the ones before this one

5. blue’s clues, it was my favorite childhood show and i love the reboot of it so much!! especially p for pride moment in that song i don’t remember the name of, blue themself!! steve leaving which was sad but getting an equally amazing host in the process?? amazing!! the scene where salt and pepper introduced their baby, paprika?? just,,,it’s such good show and i loved it when i was younger and i still love it now!!

[mccarricks]

( brittany o’grady / demi woman ) WESLEY McCARRICK is 23 years old and is a SENIOR at thales university. SHE is majoring in FILM and is known for being THE MAVERICK as THEY can be HUMOROUS and OPEN-MINDED as well as DITZY and IMPULSIVE. every time i see HER/THEM, THEY remind me of PURPLE SKY IN THE DESERT, SKATING AS FAST AS YOU CAN TO FEEL THE WIND ON YOU, A JOKE TOLD WITH A TOOTHY GRIN.

hero’s back w character no. 2 and yet......

full name: wesley ‘wes’ elaine mccarrick

birthdate: february 2, 1997

age: 23

gender: demi woman

pronouns: she/her/they/them

zodiac: aquarius

nationality: american

ethnicity: black (louisiana creole) and white (irish)

hometown: santa fe, nm

languages: english, intermediate spanish

family:

theodore mccarrick, father

elaine barlow, mother

ruby mccarrick, older brother

delphine mccarrick, older sister

sherri barlow, maternal grandmother

many cousins

orientation: bisexual biromantic, pref. towards women/nb people but will date men

religion: agnostic

height: 5 ft 4 in

distinguishing features: eyebrows, hair, lips

character inspo: ilana wexler (broad city), harley quinn (dc comics), phoebe buffay (friends), prob more

𝐁𝐀𝐂𝐊𝐆𝐑𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐃

TRIGGERS: divorce, mentions of crime, drug and alcohol use

the youngest child of ted and elaine mccarrick, wes was a kid who is full of life. she’s the kind of kid who did things to make you smile, and it usually worked. she was warm and inviting, a little naive, but she had a strong support system.

her parents divorce when she’s six, she doesn’t quite understand it but her dad moves out, and her grandma and multiple cousins move in. it’s a lively household, between her mom, who works as a nurse, and her siblings, and her cousins, it was never really quiet and there was never a lot of room.

despite the split, her parents maintain that their children have a relationship with both of them, and truthfully, wes is a daddy’s girl. she and her dad were cut from the same cloth, happy go lucky, fun loving, a bit silly, he’s the one who introduces her to movies. it’s their thing, watching and critiquing them together, and it’s not whatever is in theatres either. they went for all times of filmmaking, new wave, surrealist, and more.

it really stuck with wes, who herself had begun making movies, mostly horror/fantasy/scifi stuff with her friends-- she writes and directs and occasionally, she’ll don a costume and star in them. they’re silly little things, but her family always sat down for her “premieres.”

her formative years are marked with plenty of things, sports, deaths of distant family members, a cousin or two who gets caught in the wrong crowd and ends up in jail, and throughout this, wes remains a rock for her family.

she’s in high school, and she gets into the eclectic crowd, the outcasts, the weirdos, the ones who smoked under the bridge, and partied out in an abandoned trailer near the desert. these freaks were her freaks. they accepted her with open arms, as she them.  

she chooses thales because she always wants to see the east coast, and frankly, as much as she loves her family, she wants to be free of them. and they have a fantastic film program. so!

she meets steven in their first film class together, and they’re fast friends, despite her usual weariness of YET another film bro, steven proves to be a good egg. so she thinks. she finds out through him talking that he might not be the most faithful to his girlfriend, and as much as she doesn’t like meddling, she thinks it’s only right to let clarissa, who she doesn’t really know well, know. however, before there’s a chance, everything happens-- now she’s stuck wondering if she should reveal the truth, or let sleeping dogs lie.

nana is different, nana and her dated her sophomore year, nana’s freshman year. it wasn’t serious. but they were fond of each other. they eventually break up, but they stay friendly, waving to each other in the halls, chatting at parties.

both the disappearance and the murder is weird for wes, who by all accounts, isn’t great at dealing with bad shit. she prefers to laugh about things. laugh about everything. because if she doesn’t laugh, she’ll cry.

𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐎𝐍𝐀𝐋𝐈𝐓𝐘

wes is a mess, a free-spirit, a walking contradiction. she’s very independent minded, the kind of person who does things without thinking so much about the consequences, this leads her into trouble sometimes. like nicking something from a convenience store, or stealing a stop sign as a prank. she’s definitely the kind to goof off and not exactly dedicate her full attention to something. and while she’s in genuinely good spirits on most occasions, she has a staunch ‘no asshole’ policy. the type to defend the underdogs, and go after bullies. she’ll punch you with a smile on her face, and yet it ends up being more unnerving than you realize. she’s a bit of a ditz, as well, never the best at school, but can talk your ear off about the going ons of the world. she’s a lovable dumbass, for sure, and loyal to a tee once you get her as a friend.

𝐓𝐈𝐃𝐁𝐈𝐓𝐒

horror movie fan! her favorites are some of the oldies, like dracula and  the bride of frankenstein! and some new ones! big fan of jordan peele’s work, as well as ari aster’s! but mostly really advocates for women directors and directors of color!

also does roller derby! she picked this up her first year at thales and fell in love with it, i can’t think of a name for her yet, but she’s a blocker, won’t hesitate to elbow some dick at the bar

kinda a tomboy? she’s always been! she’s rough and tumble and not afraid to get down and dirty with someone, i.e. will join those football games on the quad or crawl through the mud for a scene to shoot

doesn’t know if she wants to be a director/writer or a cinematographer honestly.... she loves the technical aspects of film as much as the making the stories

definition of a bruh girl, says it a whole lot, but also just if you tell her you love her, she’ll just roll her eyes and be like you’re an idiot (which means she loves you too) she’ll be affectionate if she’s close to you

kinda a wh*re oops....... texts multiple girls at a time and doesn’t want to hurt any of their feelings she doesn’t know how she keeps ending up in these situations... also a bisexual disaster

a stoner as well..... always has a massive jar of weed

unclear whether she lives on campus or off campus but if she does live off campus she has a pet turtle named elsa lanchester after the bride of frankenstein actress

a drummer! she’s in a band (name tbd) she started drumming at a young age and found it was a good way to manage her aggression

doesn’t really do well with emotions, so she’ll either be like there, there, or try to make jokes.... she really said kids can you lighten up

walking meme... such a walking meme... doesn’t know so many things she’s like a cute puppy with no thoughts head empty but she’s so fun to be around

life of the party.... nana she came fr ur spot and she took it and she’s not sorry but she does miss u a lot

doesn’t rly feel like she’s allowed to be upset anyways bc some people have it...... way worse.... can u say Imposter syndrome

kind of an enabler...... will be that person to push u to try things but not in a peer pressurey way, more like if u are unsure abt sending a text she says do it

wears fun earrings and socks! think lollipops or gummy bears or found objects like she collects that shit it’s her lifeline

boxes! she’s been boxing since she was abt 12, courtesy of her older brother (who is now a doctor thx ruby) and it’s a good way to exercise and release stress

𝐖𝐀𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐃 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐍𝐄𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒

best friend -- two of a feather, cut from the same cloth, or complete opposites it doesnt matter to her (the abbi to her ilana)

roller derby friends -- she’s p close to the team, margs on her

makeup artist pal -- i think it would be neat fr someone to try and teach her makeup whether its normal or sfx bc she wants to look like a monster or smthn

she’s gullible, u take advantage of that -- u just tell her lies p much and she’s like yeah ok that sounds right

party friends

classmates

fwbs (f/m/nb) -- tbh she might have one or two of these but they literally are the def of pals who bone sometimes... like v good abt being like you good? u dont want more? cool me too

exes (f/m/nb) -- mostly dated women or nb people but def cld have had a guy

she smokes you out -- p much the only reason u hang out w her is bc she has good weed

someone she’s fought -- like fully decked in the face, prob said something that rubbed her the wrong way and it just devolved from there

people who dislike her -- she could definitely be seen as annoying bc shes loud and dorky and funny so ??

breaks someone out of their shell -- p self explanatory, pushes them to have fun, w everything happening shes rly like lifes too short to not take the opportunities around u

cousins! probably on her dad’s side! i figure she has some east coast fam 

anything? truly?

[saltyslack-toast]

#Knock The Book 2: The Devil All the Time

WELL, I MADE IT TO THE 2nd BOOK REVIEW OF MINE, MEANS THAT I’M A PASSIONATE AND PERSISTENT BITCH, PERIODT. No actually I’m just bored and got really nothing to do, so here I am making judgmental, invalid and uncritical book review just to ease my guilt for doing nothing at home (just so my mom see me working through my laptop).

Okay The Devil All the Time is actually my first English book. The story of how I got this book as a matter of fact is quite irritating and funny at the same time. My uni friend, she saw this book in a modest book bazaar near her hometown. She was reading the title and the word ‘devil’ just remind her of me, she bought it and just gave it straight to me…... I’m sad but like thankful???

It’s a secondhand and hardcover book but I don’t really mind, considering the fact that the quality is still very nice though, except the worn spots stained all over the cover that make the book looks very old. My friend bought this only for RP 25.000, yes dude you’re not misread this shit, it was THAT CHEAP (whoever sell and own this book before me, I really appreciate it). Although if you want to buy the new one, you can get this book for USD 26.95 which converted in rupiah would be RP 407.500, yeah its cost pretty fancy for broke students like us and I don’t know if the book’s supposed to be available in your local bookstore but I think you can find it in worldwide shipping online store like amazon or any other shop perhaps. The book’s cover illustrate a dying white mutt hanging on the ‘log’ and bunch of cross everywhere, the cover is actually make sense when you read the book. It published in 2011 by doubleday in United States of America. The Author is Donald Ray Pollock, and you can find the sum information about his background written on the cover, but based form the book’s cover you can also check his website in donaldraypollock.com but when I checked, I’m not sure if it’s really his website since it just like pest control website (LMAOO I HAD NO IDEA FR). Anyway,

Let’s go breaking down the book!

“… Too much religion could be as bad as too little, maybe even worse, but moderation was just not in her husband’s nature”

The whole story in this book, basically give you portraits regarding the life of lunatics in the time after WWII. Nope, there is no sums up about the events happened in that moment so chill y’all non-historical enthusiast bitches. This book gonna give you a bizarre experience reading it, the first 10 pages of this book was already psychedelic, I assure that shit. Have you watched Games of Thrones series on HBO? It’s chilling right how Ned Stark, the protagonist of the main series died in the first season???? EXACTLY that was the vibes u got after reading the first chapter and get crazier every time u read forward. By the way, this book embodied 7 chapters and 55 sub-chapters, the chapter in odd and even numbers has 2 different main focuses on each characteristic exist, here I sum it up for you:

On the odd numbers chapters (1, 3, and so on), the central story of these chapters is circling among the family of Willard Russel, his Mom Emma and Uncle Earskell and also those 2 insane peeps Roy Laferty and Theodore. Willard Russel used to be a navy army and a bit skeptical dealing with religion issues just like his uncle, but his mom has always been a devoted worshiper. Willard married to the beautiful and kind-hearted women named Charlotte and they was given a son named Arvin Eugene Russel, everything was normal until Charlotte got sick and Willard gone crazy praying to god for his wife’s recovery and poor little Arvin has to suffer the predicament by his own self. Their stories always give me religious-fanaticism-gloomy vibes (is that even make sense??). Don’t even get me started with the life stories of the two brutes-ass man, Roy Laferty and Theodore they were used to be ‘preacher’ in Emma and young Willard’s Church. Nothing I could say further because it’s gonna be a major spoiler for you, but their stories really giving you insights of how frustration and fanaticism allow people to do something beyond their common sense.

“You remember what I told you the other day?” He asked Arvin

“About the boys on the bus?,”

“Well, that’s what I meant, you just got to pick the right time”

On the even numbers chapters (2, 4, and so on), the main tales is pertaining on the journey of Handerson couple, Carl and Sandy. They were like the Bonnie and Clyde but sad and exploitative version in this book. Carl is a ‘photographer’ and sandy working as a waitress in a café called Wooden Spoon (Which the place where Charlotte used to work as a waitress and the place she met Willard for the first time as well). During summertime they got this ‘ritual’ ((but not in a religious way)) where they drive to different states and give a ride to the hitchhikers found on the way, then Carl forcefully offer them to fuck Sandy for free (HIS OWN WIFE) while he took pictures of them fucking and after that Carl kill them and take all the money those hitchhikers got in their pocket (dude I can’t even judge anything). But to be honest, I’m not a fan of these two characters because they were all so ANNOYING to death. And then there is Bodecker Lee who’s a police and also Sandy’s brother, ok that’s it, I’m not gonna give you any spoilers.

“… He went down the street and sat on a bench in a park the rest of the day thinking about killing himself instead. Something broke in him that day. For the first time he could see that his whole life added up to absolutely nothing…”

You might be confused since there are quite a lot of keen characters in this book but there’s a point where all these bitches are relating to each other, so chill y’all impatient gripe-ass. Overall, the flow of the story is undoubtedly interesting for you to keep going throughout the whole story, because every phase gonna make you wondering about next things happened to them. But, the transitions among every chapters is quite uncomfortable for me, because sometimes when the story has reached its climax there is no resolutions coming to solve the problem immediately, and you’re faced to read the new chapter with a whole different setting and characters so it’s kind of ruining the vibes and emotions the book has made me, but again this just my personal preference so please don’t judge (while everything I did right now is judging inaccurately).

“He realized that he would never preach again, but that was all right. He’d never been much good at it anyway. Most people just wanted to hear the cripple play”

However, what I like the most from this book is the deepening of every character exists is so fascinating, even for just the side or supporting character (for god sake I’m sorry idk what to called a character that isn’t the main one), for example a bus driver in Meade, Ohio which Willard talked to when he was on the way home after the war ended, the narration wrapped and portraits the driver’s life perfectly without make us bored, and there’s still a bunch of interesting narration about the life of the side characters in this book that also as odds and intriguing as the main character’s background (jesus, everything happened and everyone in this book is just so strange and peculiar I swear to god). The story finished in a most tragic-beautiful but still gloomy way, even though it’s quite predictable but still a very good closing for me personally. To be noted, on the way to the end of the story, there will be emerge another asshole priest character named Preston Teagardin, ready to shake you up until you finish the book. But still, let’s said this particular ‘last minute character’ has proving that the author is paying so much attention of how the story ended isn’t leaving any 'rush-made' impression (this shit might confused you I’m sorry my English hasn’t got any better *sorry hand sign* *sorry hand sign* *sorry hand sign*). # hashtag attention to the detail bro.

Holy crap, that’s the first time I’m almost able to cut all the bullshit I intend to bring it up here.

This book is one of my top 5 books that you have to read once in a life time (although I haven’t discover the other four, omg im sorry y’all). Little information for you that the first time I read this book (yeah I read it for quite few times) is when the campaign of presidential election era, which in Indonesia the religious are pretty sentimental issues, some of the people in my country suddenly became those annoying fanatical preachers, man I can’t stand it. And this book is just precisely relating to that condition and I get to know at least a glance of what the heck odds things happened in their minds, since you know fanaticism and stupidity doesn’t hit only on particular group of religions, race, gender or anything, we can all be stupid and brainless (especially me because I basically have no brain). There probably quite many scenes that is pretty disturbing to read (I don’t know if people could be triggered by it???? But I guess so) so yeah a bit warning. Overall, I genuinely recommend this book for you guys because every element in this book is almost perfect, the storylines, bold characters, and the RARE AND STRANGE AND SENSITIVE topic promote by the author in this novel is totally a BOOM. Don’t worry reading this book not going to give you those agnostic and atheist vibes HAHA chill I still consider myself a devoted Muslim tho (hashtag masyaallah ukthi).

By the way before I wrapped it up, I hear that this book will be made into a netflix film. WELL, of course I’m excited because the casts are so amazing, and I love Netflix adaptation and I enjoy watch movies as much as I read books (again, unnecessary information of mine *sorry hand sign*). I found that the release date is postponed from the origin plan in 15th May (which is three days ago from I posted this on my page) due to I don’t know perhaps corona because that bitch has ruined everyone in the world’s schedule, but for real I can’t find the exact information regarding to the updated release date, so while you wait the film to launch, why don’t you just go read the book first? I assure you this one not gonna give you any disappointment.

I think that would be it for this 2nd rubbish book review of mine. Although, I think I made a little progressive from the first one (OR MAYBE NOT???? I’M SORRY Y’ALL) but of course there’s still much deficiency I served. Still, I hope my writing get better in the process of making this whole novel of reviewing book inaccurately. To be honest, I wrote this shit not for getting any engagements or audience but for my own satisfied HAHA. So yeah I’m literally comfortable writing for nothing. But bitch guess what I’m just gonna keep going, until I could professionally writing and make it for a living? Well, amen for that.

Xiao, See you in Advance!

[madness-rains]

Beast vs. Caldwell

Vishous: *It was my night off of rotation and I was damn sure going to make good use of it. I was on the phone, making arrangements, before the shutters were even up. Everything was in place for a night of release that was sorely needed. Some things were just necessary. I dematted directly to the balcony of my Penthouse, a location that I was becoming increasingly familiar with. The glass door slid open with only a thought. Dozens of candles flared to life as I made my way directly to well stocked supply of goose. I poured myself a drink and sat down to wait for my prey to come to me. It didn't take long. She knew what I liked, knew that I didn't like to be kept waiting. I told her exactly what I wanted, which hood to wear, how many clothes to take off, and where to stand. I finished my drink and poured another as I watched her. The need was strong. This would be a long night.*

*Long strips of red welts decorated her back in a beautiful display. My own personal canvas. I wasn't anywhere near done, I was only getting started. I hadn't even broken a sweat yet. She could take a lot. I'd made sure of that when I called this particular one. Across the room the phone in my leather jacket let me know that this session was going to be far too short. I growled out a curse and went to answer the call. The ID told me that it was from Phury, which meant that something happened on patrol tonight. This could be good. Fighting was just another way to exorcise my demons. I hit the button to pick up the call.* Yes? *My tone was carefully flat, devoid of any emotion. Phury launched into a concise version of what was going down. The noise in the background gave away the fact that Rhage's Beast was lose. I heard the word Bastards and knew that this was a show that I didn't want to miss.* On my way. *I hung up the phone and slung the leather over my shoulders. Looking over at the female dangling on the wall, I half considered making her wait like that for my return. Something told me that I would be longer than that. I removed her binds and sent Fritz the standard text to take her home. The doggen would take care of her. I stepped out on the balcony and dematted directly to the location that Phury told me of. It was like dropping off in the middle of a war zone. The dragon was full on pissed. The first order of business was easy, and came almost as an instinct now, I laid down the mhis thick and large. There was no sense in the humans catching wind of this mess. My phone chimed to tell me that I had a text message. It was from Fritz. He was worried about Mary because she hadn't returned home.* Shiiiiitttt!!! *I cursed loud enough for Phury to hear me over the chaos. He ran over and gave me a questioning look. I leaned in close, hoping that Rhage wouldn't hear me.* Mary is missing…

Rhage:

{I was full on Dragon mode, and although a part of me was always there, he had taken over complete control. He cleared that alley like a hungry kid at a bar mitzvah buffet. Biting down each lesser and swallowing them whole. Bright flashes lit up the walls of the alleyway. I could see Phury scrambling to catch his balance and high tail it out. The taste of those nasty fuckers settle in the back of my throat and let me tell you, they taste like shit. The black oily substance laid low in the pit of the Dragons belly, which also meant it was in mine. I could feel the presence of Vishous and knew he would keep the situation under control as much as he could. I had great hearing, but let me tell you about the beast who had cursed me so long ago, his hearing was far more superior than mine and when V spoke the words “Mary is missing” well, there was no coming back from the state I was in. The beast would now take matters in his own way, he was partial to my Mary, and it would be death to whoever took her.}

Vishous: *Phury's eyes were as big as mine as we looked up at the chaos that three little words had caused. I cursed myself for being ten kinds of an idiot. Of course the Beast heard me. And now we were about to be host to our own little Godzilla movie. I grabbed Phury and swung him out of the way of the rampaging dragon.* Get a car! *I yelled over the noise.* Follow after us. I have to keep this contained. *How the hell I was going to do that, I had no idea. This would be testing my mhis like nothing else. We were already on the move and there wasn't a damn thing that I could do about the damage that was left behind. The Beast didn't give a shit if something was in it's way. He would run over, tear it down, smash it to bits. Everyone thought that a bonded male was bad news but they had never met Rhage's other half. He would leave the city in ruins all to find Mary. I threw the mhis out far in front of us to cover as much ground as I possibly could. It was late at night. There weren't a lot of people out and about. It was the one saving grace. I couldn't even stop to worry about how many innocents were going to end up in the hospital. The only thing that hit my radar was keeping the image of a dragon off of the airwaves. Racing along behind a huge dragon was actually easier than I thought it would be. Was he fast? Oh hell yeah. But he also had a lot in way that slowed him down. Damage control. My mind was jogging through all of my options. This would have to be fast and dirty. I pulled out my phone and went to work. The division of attention would likely cost me but I needed to get an earthquake called in ASAP. It had to come from the right sources or no one would believe it. Good thing I was a frickin genius.*

Barney:

{I continued fighting to regain control, but to no avail, the beast had won. His senses were heightened. His eyes, keen, hearing, well, he would hear a flea bite a dog, his smell. That is what he would use to find who had Mary. I felt the street crumbling under his massive claw like feet. The heat was building and I knew the fire was going to blow soon. He would burn this motherfucker down before the night was over with. In the depths of his mind, I could hear the crashing of cold hard steel being bent and mutilated. He was headed to the place Mary worked. The Beast would sniff out the poor asshole who had her and this would be the last night he took breath into his lungs.}

Vishous: *Was an earthquake really going to explain everything that the Beast was ripping through? I didn't know but it was the best I could come up with on short notice. I was so busy making the needle bounce on the appropriate seismic machines that I didn't see Barney take a sharp left. I skidded to a halt when I realized I wasn't following the path of destruction anymore. With a curse I tucked my phone away and brought all my attention to the scene in front of me. He'd managed to move beyond my mhis if the screaming was any indicator. He was a bloodhound on a mission. There was no one better equipped to find Mary, that was the sad truth of it. That was his mate, the Beast as well as the male beneath there. I moved the mhis to cover the new area of effect which created a few very confused humans to wonder what in the hell was going on. They at least had the sense to get the hell out of the way. Whatever it was, wasn't good. I spied one amateur photographer who was about to have a very nasty fall. I ran into him full force with my shoulder down. Didn't even see me coming. Sure as hell didn't see me grind my shitkicker into his fallen phone. Oops, my bad. I didn't even pause for so much as a 'sorry'. The Beast was already past the place that Mary volunteered at. He paused for maybe a heartbeat to sniff at what looked like a purse on the ground and then he was off again. Someone had picked the wrong female to snatch up, that much was for damn sure. I snagged the purse and kept running behind the force of nature that I was following.*

T-REX:

{The scent of the dumbass who had my Mary was so strong through the beast. I felt the anger building and knew that the male human had no chance of coming out of this alive. I felt a burst of heat power out in front and knew that he was spitting fire. The ground began to quake beneath us. Right then I knew he had found his quest. Explosions happened, and I feared that the anger that I was cursed with one day would go out of control and hurt the ones I cared about, although I didn’t worry about Mary. Mary calmed the beast, his love and desire for her were like no other I had ever felt. As a bonded male it made me jealous. I could hear screams in the background. I was frustrated that I couldn’t gain enough control to overcome my curse and hold Mary close to my chest. I had to rely on my alter to bring her into safety….. I was watching the outcome through some filtered movie screen. My senses were heightened, and I could sniff out where the asshole was held up. He had his hands on my Mary, and the beast lost it. He plucked him out like a delicate flower not hurting her and flung him against the wall. Out of pure and enraged anger fire consumed the room and the now kidnapper was engulfed in flames. Blood-curdling screams were filling the room. The last I remember, the heavenly smell of my Mary calmed me into a deep sleep and with most certainty that he had rescued her out of the inferno without a single hair harmed.}

Vishous: *The scene before me was nothing that I could have anticipated. The whole bonded male thing was not something to be messed with but nothing topped a fully bonded dragon. I had a split second to take in the scene before all hell broke loose. Some idiot decided that it was great idea to kidnap Mary. She was tied to a chair in the corner of the large room. Her head was slumped forward, it was obvious that she'd been roughed up. The extent was hard to see from here but the dumbass responsible was still right there. Of course I was trying to see her across a battlefield as well. If it could be called that. More like a slaughter. The guy had exactly two seconds to regret his decisions. Blood drained from his face and could see Mary laughing. Her mouth moved and I strained to hear what she was saying. Something like, "I told you my husband would come for me." He was dead the moment he even thought to touch that female. The Beast wanted him to suffer in the most brutal of ways. He was torn limb from limb, screaming the entire time, literally washing the place in the blood of the kidnapper. Thank goodness Mary was made of strong stuff because most any other females would be losing it right now too. When the screams finally died down Mary was able to quiet the Beast. Even tied up, she still managed to bring him back down to earth. It wasn't something that any of us would have been able to do. I didn't even think of approaching the female until the Beast had left the building and we were left with a very tired and groggy Rhage. I went right back into damage control mode. The mhis still held strong but now I was dealing with a dead body. There was one sure way of wiping that slate clean. I got Mary untied just before Phury arrived on the scene with the Escalade. Together we bundled up Warrior and Female and he left with them, leaving me to deal with the aftermath. I looked around the gory interior and casually plucked the fingers of my glove free. I tucked the black leather into my back pocket and knelt to the ground. My blazing hand touched the floor in front of me and that was all that it took. In a few minutes nothing was left but a field of glass.*