#natalie’s being a bitch i’m sorry

[aestheticaltcow]

The Aftermath

Carmy left- he just left? Where the heck was he? Was he even alive? Your anxiety almost gets the best of you.

The Bear Masterlist

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MDNI 18+

You groaned as you stretched, trying to crack your back. You’d been cleaning all afternoon, Carmy was still MIA, and this was the one thing you knew would distract you enough not to storm into The Bear demanding to know where your husband had been last night. You hopped up on the counter and grabbed your phone from the charger. A knot formed in the back of your throat when you saw a text from Carmy displayed on your lock screen.

Sorry about last night, baby.

On my way home.

“Okay. Fuck you, Carmy. At least you’re alive.” you mumbled to yourself before hopping down from the counter and going down the hallway to your bedroom. You knew the two of you would have a screaming match when he got home; you rolled your eyes at the thought. He was usually predictable; this running away from home debacle threw you for a loop. Since the fighting was inevitable, you opted to take care of yourself a little bit at least, and an everything-shower seemed like the move.

Pregnancy was hard; you were in a constant state of nausea, you were exhausted, you had almost daily migraines toward the end, and, oh boy… hormones were interesting. You gained a decent amount of weight, but loved how you looked. Carrying Mia made every body insecurity you had vanish. You felt powerful as she grew in your womb, and the feelings were only amplified by the way Carmy would caress your stomach at night when he’d get home from work. He’d pepper kisses across your stomach and talk to Mia as he helped you rub shea butter in an attempt to prevent stretch marks. You laughed about it now as you stood in front of the bathroom mirror. Cellulite, stretch marks, loose skin, and a c-section scar decorated your body. All those insecurities you’d thought vanished returned as soon as you showered for the first time post-partum. You didn’t want anyone to see you, especially Carmy. 

You’d always been so secure in your relationship with Carmy. Something ignited within you when you saw him sitting at the bar by himself the night the two of you met. He was sexy and aloof. You had turned to your friend and told her, ‘I’m gonna marry that guy,’ and cocked your head in Carmy’s direction. She gave you a nod of approval, and you were off. He was shy and confused about why the prettiest girl in the bar would want to talk to some loner drinking a ginger ale instead of one of the guys coming up to her throughout the night. After months of casual hookups or late-night lounging around his apartment, Carmy found the courage to take you out on an actual date. After that, you declared he was your boyfriend. He admitted to being in love with you and was overjoyed when you returned the sentiment. Carmy was your knight in shining armor. You knew he was in your corner if you ever had a problem or needed to talk about something. It was you and him against the world, and it only amplified when he proposed to you. The two of you had a small wedding on the beach and decided to travel for a few months. When the two of you started dating, Carmy recounted tales from his time in culinary school- you were shocked that the man had lived in Frances for years but hadn’t explored the city beyond his campus or the restaurants he worked at. Exploring Europe together felt like a dream; it was everything you’d wanted to do with him. The two of you hadn’t planned on having kids, but after a couple of years of living as a married couple and buying your home, it felt like a natural progression to just ‘see what would happen’ if you got off of your birth control.

Now you stood in the shower while your mother took care of your baby and your bitch of a husband hid at work. You sighed and exited the shower, wrapping your hair in a towel and tying your bathrobe at the waist. You checked your phone to see no new messages from Carmy and that Natalie had left you on read.

As you blow-dried your hair, you couldn’t shake the thoughts of Carmy doing something dumb last night. You knew he’d never cheat on you, but the curiosity about where he’d gone was killing you. You took your time blowing out your hair and doing your skincare routine. As you brushed your teeth, you heard the front door open. “Hey… I’m home.” Carmy’s voice called through the house. Your stomach twisted at the sound. You took a deep breath and quickly put on deodorant before walking out of the bathroom in a pair of fresh pajamas. After contemplating jumping out the window to avoid this conversation from happening, you cautiously exited the bedroom. You went down the hallway to see Carmy washing his hands in the kitchen.

“Hey.” you grinned, rubbing your arm nervously. Carmy inhaled sharply before closing the distance between the two of you. He wrapped his arms around you tightly, feeling the stress of the day melt away as he took in the scent of your conditioner. “I’m sorry, baby. I shouldn’t have left like that,” he spoke into your hair. You sighed and hesitantly hugged him; he rubbed circles into your back and wished to go back in time and change what had happened. 

“Where were you? You’ve never done something like that before- I thought you were dead or something Carmy.” Carmy tucked your head under his chin and contemplated what he should say. He knew he’d have to come clean eventually but wanted to relish in this moment.

“I just drove around and went to work early.” he lied, hoping you’d not push it further. Natalie had ripped him a new one when he’d confessed the details of his indiscretion. She ranted about how she’d feel if Pete had treated her like that; she’d kick his ass to the curb. “You realize she’s gonna leave your ass, right? You absolutely can not sleep at my house- Carmen Anthony Berzatto, you’re no better than Dad.” before he could respond, Natalie threatened to kick his ass if he didn’t come clean to you about what happened. Carmy wanted to tell you, but being compared to his father was something he hadn’t expected Natalie to say. He didn’t know the guy that well, but he knew a little about the cheating. He didn’t have a second family or kids outside his marriage with Donna, but he saw the hurt it put her through and vowed never to be like the man. Now he stood in his kitchen holding his wife- the love of his fucking life, lying about his whereabouts from the night before. Yeah, he didn’t get past third base, but would he have gone all the way if he had gotten hard? Would you constitute this as cheating? Would you leave him and keep Mia from him? He pushed the thoughts back and pressed his nose into your hair. He took in the scent of your conditioner, just in case this was the last time.

You pulled away from the hug and nodded, “Okay. I trust you, but never do something like that again. You scared the crap out of me.” 

Carmy and you sat at the dining room table that night and talked about your insecurities postpartum and that while you were medically cleared to have sex, you were nervous about the actual act. He nodded, and you felt vindicated. You kissed his cheek and headed into the kitchen to order dinner. Carmy grinned and fished his phone out of his pocket. He deleted his text chain with Selena and quickly blocked her number before you came back to ask if he had any preferences for dinner. Carmy shook his head, “Whatever you want, baby.”

The two of you ate dinner in the living room and watched the newest cheesy romcom on Netflix. Carmy sat back and took in the moment. It was like when the two of you had started dating. You’d always had some kind of freelance video editing job or some other creative endeavor that gave you a good amount of flexibility in your schedule. No matter how late he’d get off, you were always down to come over, watch a movie, eat takeout, or whatever new recipe he was trying to perfect. You explained that quality time was your main language, so as long as you were together, you were happy doing whatever with him. 

As the movie continued, you’d put your head on Carmy’s chest and held onto his waist. He had an arm around your shoulder- he stunk of his usual kitchen smells and smoke, but there was another scent you couldn’t quite place. “I should probably shower if you wanna cuddle, baby.” he laughed as you pushed a hand under the hem of his T-shirt. Carmy had long forgotten about the hickey that decorated his collarbone. You hummed in disagreement, “Your BO is comforting Carm…” 

Carmy laughed and kissed the top of your head. Carmy tapped your shoulder as the movie ended, signaling he wanted to get off the couch: “I need a shower, baby.” He shifted in his seat, and you looked up at him. “Kiss me?” you asked, looking up at him through your lashes. Carmy swallowed and hurriedly nodded as he gently placed his lips on yours. You smiled into the kiss as the taste of tobacco and spearmint flooded your tastebuds. You removed your hand from under Carmy’s shirt and put it on his cheek. Carmy wasn’t sure where to put his hands. This felt like a 180 from the previous day, confusing and excited him.

You threw a leg over Carmy’s hips to straddle him as the kiss turned more passionate. Carmy’s hands found your hips; his touch felt like electricity shooting through your body in the best way. You pulled away from the kiss, gently pulling Carmy’s bottom lip between your teeth, eliciting a deep throaty moan from him. You ran your hands down Carmy’s chest. He closed his eyes, focusing on the sensation of your nails tickling his skin through the material of his shirt. “Still need me, baby?” you asked, leaning in to kiss Carmy’s jaw. “Still need to be inside of me?” you said as you trailed kisses up his jaw toward his earlobe. You felt his cock harden beneath you as you rolled your hips against him. Carmy’s grip on your hips tightened at the sensation, “Please, baby.” he whined. You giggled at his response and slowly swirled your tongue around Carmy’s earlobe before leaning back on his thighs. Carmy leaned back into the couch. His eyes were dark with lust as you reached for the hem of your shirt, quickly discarding it. 

Carmy’s eyes widened at the sight of your bare breasts, “Fuckin’ hell, baby.” he muttered. You bit your lip as Carmy stared at you, “Can-can I-” Carmy began to stutter before you cut him off by bringing one of his hands to your chest. “Fuck.” Carmy laughed as he snaked an arm around your waist to bring you closer. You giggled as Carmy massaged your breast in his large, calloused hand, “Baby- fuck, you’re so sexy.” 

You moaned softly as Carmy gently pushed you back onto the couch before trailing delicate kisses down your stomach to the top of your pajama shorts. As eager as he was to remove them, he still felt like he was dreaming. Your eyes met and you nodded, Carmy bit his lip holding back a groan. He swiftly yanked the soft cotton material down your legs to reveal your lack of panties. He smirked as he spread your legs wider and stared down at your core like a starved animal. 

“Carmy?” you asked softly, “Do you want me to stop?” he responded, hoping you would say ‘no.’ You shook your head, “Be gentle?” you whispered. Carmy nodded, “Of course, baby. Say, stop, and I will…” 

Carmy put your legs over his shoulders and nuzzled his face between your thighs, placing delicate kisses against your folds. Your legs shook as he ran his tongue up to your clit, “Mmm,” you hummed as he took your clit between his lips. “Oooh,” you moaned as Carmy slowly pushed his index finger into your entrance. Your reaction only fueled Carmy’s desire to please you. As your juices flooded his tastebuds, you bucked your hips up against his mouth, making him moan against your clit.

“I need you,” you whined, pulling at Carmy’s hair. Reluctantly, he pulled his mouth away from your heat. “What do you need me to do, baby?” Carmy teased. You giggled as he moved to hover above your body. You pulled at the hem of his T-shirt, wanting to feel his skin against yours. 

Carmy’s body tensed. You noticed the color drain from his face, the weight of his actions from the night prior finally hitting him. “Are you okay, Carmen?” you asked as you stopped pulling at his shirt. He nodded, “Yeah-h.” 

You didn’t believe him. “You’re being weird. I don’t care that you’re gross from work. I want you.” You looked into his eyes and could sense he was hiding something from you. “I’m not being weird,” he said defensively. You shook your head, pushed up at his chest, and sat up against the arm of the couch. “You literally left last night because I didn’t want to have sex- now I want you and you’re being fuckin’ weird. Take your clothees off and fuck me.” you demanded, Carmy swallowed and sat up on the couch. He shouldn’t have let it go this far, you rolled your eyes and yanked his shirt off. 

“What the fuck is that!” you screamed when you saw the dark purple hickey decorating his collar bone, Carmy stared at you nervously. “YOU FUCKIN’ LIAR!” you screamed louder pushing yourself off the couch picking up your T-shirt from the floor. 

“Baby, I swear—I didn’t—" Carmy explained as he scrambled to his feet as you walked down the hallway toward your bedroom. Your blood boiled at the thought of Carmy fucking another woman last night while he was ‘getting air,’ “YOU’RE A FUCKING LIAR GET THE FUCK OUT OF THIS HOUSE, I SWEAR TO FUCKING GOD CARMEN!” you screamed at the top of your lungs as you glared at him as tears started to fall from your eyes. Carmy’s face regained color and softened in reaction to your screams. 

“Y/N, it was a mistake! We didn't have sex because I couldn’t get hard-” Carmy attempted to explain the situation, and you shook your head in response. “That’s fuckin’ bullshit! Get out!” you screamed through your tears.

Carmy dropped to his knees and reached out for your hand. You slapped it away and ignored his begs to hear him out and let him explain what had happened. “No. No. I don’t want to- that’s why you wanted to fuckin’ shower so bad, right?! Didn’t want to fuck your wife with your dirty fuckin’ cock you fucking liar!” you screamed as you attempted to pull your wedding ring off of your finger. When it wouldn’t budge, you screamed in frustration and slammed the bedroom door. 

Carmy fell back and brought his knees to his chest, the weight of his actions truly hitting him when you had tried to take off your wedding ring. He really had ruined his marriage. Carmy heard your sobs through the door as he got up, “Y/N- it was a mistake. I love you. I love you so fuckin’ much-” 

“GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE CARMEN! I FUCKING HATE YOU!”

~

Tag List

@namjoons-crabssss @sl-ut @thottae @cuddlehye @prurose @1184p @chaoticfanficfanx @ok-boke @literatureluster @bxtchopolis @americanprometheuss @buckystwilight @earth-elemental18 @thebearlily @siren-melodies @thel0v3hashira143 @innercreationflower @unpoqu1todetodo @thehouseofevangelista

[moonflowerdamie]

rating yellowjackets ships (lowest to highest!) because i am bored and also because i want people to know just how insane i am for some of the pairings in this show‼️ LETSGOOOOO

•travnat—3/10•

they’re…ok i guess? like. i don’t actively hate them, but i really don’t ship them. and yeah i get that they clung to each other and bonded over dad trauma and stuff, but a) i don’t like travis (PLS DONT ATTACK ME HE’S JUST NOT FOR ME AND I COULDNT GET OVER THE MISOGYNY) and b) i fully believe natalie scatorccio is AT LEAST bisexual and deserves a lady lover!!! so yeah. not for me.

•mistynat—4/10•

ok. OK. hear me out PLEASE bc i know some people are gonna be mad i’ve put them this low. i just don’t really see it? like i fully believe that it’s possible misty had a crush on nat in the teen timeline and i’m pretty convinced adult misty was definitely infatuated/obsessed with adult nat BUT i don’t think nat ever reciprocated? and i can’t see her ever feeling that way about misty IM SORRY. i don’t hate the ship by any means, it’s just not my favourite!!!

•jackielot—5/10•

they’re both pretty femme lesbians and i think maybe they should smooch (and then smooch ME MY GAWD PLS ONE CHANCE😫🙏🏻). that’s all i have to say about that.

•shaunanat—5/10•

i just know the rivalry in s3 is gonna HIT and maybe they should kiss and make up about it (AND THEN KISS ME TOO MY FUCKING LORD I NEED THEM BOTH SO BAD🫦). but fr i mean like a cute idea in another world yk? they would SO bully the shit out of each other and then fuck nasty about it🤝.

•crystal x misty (crusty😭)—6/10•

they were cute!!! they matched each other’s freak🥹 until misty freaked a little too hard 😔 no but actually they could’ve been cute musical theatre gfs and i would’ve been here for it!!!

•taishauna—6/10•

i LOVE their friendship in both timelines and i do prefer them platonically BUT i see the potential. i think they soften each other, and allow the other to process and feel their emotions, and also help to rationalise them. LOVE the friendship and if i didn’t prefer their other ships i could defo see myself getting into them!

•lottielee—7/10•

the disciple and the prophet??? uhhh YEAH. i mean laura lee literally haunts lottie for 25 YEARS. that bitch NEVER got over what they had. are they my favourite ship? no. do i wish they’d kissed in that lake? YES YES YES YES YES. the yearning, the religious symbolism/guilt, the TENDERNESS. i am IN.

•lottieshauna—8/10•

BRRSKLLAKSKS just yes. YES. THE PROPHET AND HER BUTCHER😫. their relationship is so complicated and beautiful but i think they could be very special, specifically in the teen timeline. they’re so fiercely protective of each other but would never admit it. they hate each other. they admire each other. they resent each other. THEY LOVE EACH OTHER. i wholeheartedly believe lottie was shauna’s bi awakening when they were like 13 and shauna never really stopped thinking lottie was gorgeous. just. THEM.

•jackienat—8/10•

i am a SUCKER for the popular x loser trope and even more so when they’re LESBIANS😁 like lottie was shauna’s awakening, nat was jackie’s. ONE MILLION PERCENT they were childhood besties and one day they kissed ‘to practice’ when they were like 11 and jackie was like ‘OH😨’ and knew then and THERE she was a lesbian. i love them your honour. like shaunanat, i think they’d bully each other, but i also think they’d be so soft with each other. OH and nat would SO tease jackie for being popular and rich and preppy and call her ‘princess’ in jest but would for real treat her like a princess and would beat up anyone who said a bad word about her. yes PLEASEEEEE.

•taivan—10/10•

THEEE IT COUPLE! they are just *mwah* chef’s kiss. especially in the teen timeline! they just balance each other so perfectly, like they were LITCHRALLY made for each other🥹. van is goofy and silly and a dreamer, tai is serious, intense; a realist. they just so clearly love each other so so much and i ADORE THEM. ‘happy wife happy life’ YYYYEEEAHHHHH. i’m gonna be so devastated when they eventually break up in the teen timeline and DONT EVEN GET ME STARTED on if/when van dies in the adult timeline☹️. not even thinking about it actually. just them and their soft tender gay love🤗.

•lottienat—1000000/10•

i genuinely will start tweaking if i think about these two for too long. they just make me so ASKSHSLSLSJSJ😫. i don’t even think i can articulate how much i love them. the rich girl and the burnout. the hunter and the prophet. THEY ARE SO PERFECT FOR EACH OTHER. the bath scene????? DIED DEAD ON THE FLOOR. ‘is that what we are’ GONE REQUIRING CPR. lottie kissing nat’s hands for so long after giving up her leadership, the last thing she had left? SIX FEET FUCKING UNDER😨. nah but fr, i NEEEED them to kiss. they would be so good for each other. the potential is…UNFUCKINGLIMITED (i am choosing to ignore the fact that nat’s dead thank you xoxo). just…the tenderness. the pining. they’re narrative foils. they’re enemies. they’re friends. they’re something more. YELLOWJACKETS…DROP A LOTTIENAT KISS IN S3 AND MY LIFE IS YOURS🙏🏻.

and finally…my fucking roman empire…

•jackieshauna—9999999999999/10•

there is a hole in my heart in the shape of these two. they’re…EVERYTHING. god they just loved each other so much but life and the wilderness and jeff and their own self-destruction got in the way. jackie loved shauna so much it killed her. shauna loved jackie so much she ATE her. they were completely undefinable—best friends, rivals, soulmates. entirely devoted. i just ache when i think about what they could have had. the tragedy of them is life-altering. shauna will miss jackie for longer than she knew her and that fact makes me want TO OFF MYSELF. they are intertwined forever, not knowing where one ends and the other begins. i wholeheartedly believe they were in love with each other but didn’t know how to say it. because of jeff, because it was 1996, because love couldn’t even possibly cover what it was they felt for each other. in my head, they’re together. in my head, they ran away together and lived a long and happy life. and it kills me to know that’s not what happened. they actually make me fucking insane and i’ll never get over them.

now have some memes bc i’m silly like that🤭

[marzipanlvr]

Magnus chase is so babygirl 😭❤️ bless his soul (spoilers ahead :)

(a few) instances Magnus chase is Magnus chasing:

The first thing he did when he met his dad was bear hug him

Chose healing others over saving himself

So supportive of Samirah and Amir

Quote and quote: “I wish I could round up every homeless person in Boston and say, Hey, there’s a big mansion right over here with thousands of comfy quotes and free food forever. Follow me!

he’s more natalie chase than he thinks

never ever stops caring :((

when uncle Randolph was being a bitch and all Magnus still considered what Randolph has been through to its highest extent

He really does his best to understand the world around him like he did with Alex and Samirah

Magnus and Hearth. That’s it. The time hearth called Magnus “brother” and it came to fruition how much it meant for hearth to say that to Magnus.

bro how he treats family should he exhibited in a museum. him and annabeth are the cutest magnus is so sweet

This MAN istg is a precious godsent rarity I HOPE HE DIESNT DIE (I mean I hope he doesn’t die AGAIN)

random quirk I like about Magnus I audibly gasped when he mentioned he liked to read and his valhalla suite has a library 😭❤️ weird way to propose but yes!!

Weird take but I feel like he smells like summer and he gives the best hugs ever

Btw I’m not finished with Magnus chase yet :)) don’t spoil please!!

I LOVE this fandom so much I love how everyone is so kind and helpful I literally love being here especially with how people interacted with my last post <33 Hope u all had a great day :)) I’m sorry if you didn’t, but there will be better days to come!!

[zabala0z]

Hi, my name is Zabala0z and welcome back to “Local crazy girl listens to TMA s4”. You know me, I’m ur host, yada yada

MAG 142: Scrutiny

It is so crazy hearing Jon from another persons POV. Like damn there goes his humanity bit by bit. It does make me wonder cause he never mentioned this little incident in the tapes. Did he purposely leave it out? Or does he not remember this.

“Not nice being interrogated” I see what you did there 💀 Martins being a bit more mean. I support it

MAG 143: Heart of Darkness

I love having a clear timeline. Y’know I was never super scared of The Dark, it’s actually at the bottom of my ranking of “Which TMA entities would scare me the most” but after hearing about the ritual in such extensive detail…yeah no I get it. Also, yay Natalie! Still feel horribly bad for her. I really don’t like cults. (Too bad she’ll die 💀)

THATS WHY HE KIDNAPPED THAT BOY. To use him as a vessel. Which is crazy. I’m assuming the black fog coming out of Maxwells mouth was to like possess the boy, Callum- but that makes me think. Yeah, even though it didn’t get on Callum, it hit the other guy. The policeman. The one whose eyes went milky and died. Or I think he died. But what I’m thinking is that the possession was successful just with the wrong guy.

It sounds like Manuela is like the last person of the Peoples Church of the Divine Host. Also I love how Jon went, “man that’s beautiful. Anyways-“ and then the dark sun was extinguished. Or lit up? I don’t know but it’s funny anyways. Bye Manuela, you scared me.

MAG 144: Decrypted

Ah. The Extinction. Nice to hear a statement about it. I’ve been wondering if any of the previous statements were related to it, I might try to skim some.

Also nooo Martin ☹️ stop being an asshole. Anyways, bit scared on who this man Peter Lukas is bringing from out of the country. Is it one of his relatives? Nathaniel Lukas?

MAG 145: Infectious Doubts

Gertrude Robinson has all my respect. Genuinely, what a badass. “Maybe you choose a bad God” GET HIS ASS ‼️‼️ Honestly Arthur Nolan is like the most tolerable servant of The Desolation. Then he started talking about his tenants and I started feeling sick again but y’know maybe in another universe, him and Gertrude got drinks. Not as friends, just as weird coworkers or something.

The Web is so interesting. I’m so curious about it because it’s never attempted a ritual, and there’s not much on it. I wanna know Annabelle’s deal actually. Come on girl, you wear thrifted clothes, you can’t be that bad.

It’s so interesting to hear about the entities. Like Gertrude said, they probably don’t think at all but they do so much yet so little. Bitches. Also this proves my theory that all landlords are evil.

So happy Jack will be safe. Bro needs it. Literally everyone hates him and he’s just a dude 💀 I don’t feel any sympathy for Eugene. Hope he suffers more

Okay that’s all I got! Long post, sorry about that. I have a model UN thing over the weekend so my posts are gonna be as slow as ever sorry. Expect more fanart though

[thecapricunt1616]

The Bear S3 Capri Live React

WARNING! Spoilers for each episode below the cut!

EP 1 - “Tomorrow”

ASSHFBEJNSNDNEJWNENE AND WHEN IM BACK IN CHICAGO I FEEL ITTT!!!!!! WOOOOOO

CARMY HRJEJWJW YOU'RE OUT OF FREEZER JAIL MY LOVE!!

Oh your poor hand I wanna kiss it, my sweet baby :((

Omg it’s filmed so differenttttt AAAAAA!!!!

Zaddy walked in meaning business lets gOOO

Like I said in TB&HH and many of my one shots this is a STUNNING restaurant - like FUCK!!! Carmy is BRILLIANT !!

Carmen RELAX!! Jesus! With punting the chair!

Omg his notebook from The French Laundry!!! Cute

BRBEBSHSBSNSBSBSBSBSEBVELHCAA LUCAAAAAAA

COPENHAGEN OH MY GO FJEJWBDBD WERE BACK

OHRBE WE ARE SO BACK

New Yorks got everything :( OH this seeaaason is gonna rip my heart to shreeeeeds New York destroyed him.

Oh I think we are getting loads of baby chef Carmy FUCK 

Oh god oh god 'subtract'??? Fuuuuck

I would hate how perfect he always is HAHAHAHA I would haaaate working with him!!!!

Cousin Steve took care of him, I'm glad someone did 🥺

Oh fucking for Carmy to kiss me like that 

The kiss on the nose is everything I want to do in life 

SORRY. THE WORDS OMG GOOD BOY GOOD BOY

OMG SYDCARMY KISS KISSKISSKISSIIISSS

“It’s never gonna happen again” he will die before it happens 

Good apologize to Richie you FUCKING IDIOT and good for saying I’m sorry good for saying I love you. Good boy. Good boy. 

He is about to make everyone miserable.  

“I know you are, honey” that is his real mother figure. 

While Mikey was dying Richie was destroying his marriage trying to save him and Carmy was getting verbally abused in New York. I am…gutted! 

I have thought about Carmy finding out about Mike. I never. Fucking. Thought. They. Would. Show it.

ARE WE SEEING MIKES 

WE ARE OH NY FJEBE WE ARE SEEING MICHAELS FUCKING OH HIS FUNERAL HE SAT. OUTSIDE. OH I AM COOKED THIS SEASON I AM C O O K E D !!!!!

“LET IT RIP BEAR” OH FHEJWBDBDB 

Like a mother Nat snuck the money in his pocket. I’m fuckin CRYYYING BRO THIS SEASON IS GONNA GUT ME 

The best meal Syd has ever had 🥹

The fennel makes him think of Syd because she has an allergy I’m gonna stroke out. 

EP1 ; Final Thoughts - SydCarmy is SO happening if it doesn’t what the fuck are they doing. Baby Carmy is gutting me. I hope Luca doesn’t go away after this episode. Mikey. Oh, Mikey :(((. Natalie? The cinematography - oh I’m about to EAT w these fics. Oh my god.I am fucking GUUTTTEEDDD THIS SEASON IS GOING TO DESTROY ME

EP2 - “Next”

SYD! MY GORL THERE YOU ARE BBY!!!

the AirPod falling out is so real

Lmaoooo her dad !! She is absolutely moving out as soon as she can 

Awww the ‘love you chef’ <3

See this music like shut up SydCarmy or bust!!! lmaooooo

Why is the fourth wall being broken???

His anxiety is so insane he is acting cracked out LMAO

CICERO OH NO - this is gonna be INSANE

Carmy needs to step off Syds dick and give her some control lmfaooo - like ? you don’t even own this place little man.

“Technique is spelt wrong but OK” BYE THIS IDIOTTTTTTTTTTTTTT 

“You know buddy, I tried to call in and get you an order but they says you was back in the fridge yelling at yourself” LMFOAAOAOAO VJKFDNVLAKNLKVN I AM CRYING HE IS I LOVE UNC SO MUCH

everyone is asking him why the fuck he’s doing this and he cant say “because i cant stick my dick in syd” so he doesn’t know what to say.

He’s quitting smoking not for his health but to save … time. Alright then.

“The computer drafted the agreement so make sure you have a lawyer look at it” CAAAACKLING 

DAAAAADDDYYYY RICHIEEEE

Carmen shut the fuck up you are in no position for fuck yous.

“I commend your bravery from inside a locked vault” IM DRFNDJSNENN HAHAHAHA GET HIM RICH

“Oh my god am I finally having a stroke?” “Am I having a stroke?” These POOR WOMEN SOMEONE PUT CARMEN ON A FUCKING LEASH

“I insist that you get fucked my good man” BYEEEEE HAHAHAHAHAHA RICHIE IS TOO FUNNY 

They are bickering like BITCHES 

his ego needs to be stroked lmaoooo he’s asking Syd to stroke his ego 

“I know sweetheart, don’t be scared” NATALIEEEE HAHAHAH It's ok Fak I'M scared of Carmy rn lmao.

holy fucking shit Carmen you are driving me CRRAAAAZYY SHUT UP 

“This is scary” FAK, HONEY I KNOW CARMY IS CRACKED OUT

“Every day Jeffery-Ballet?” TINA HAHAHAHA I LOVE THAT 

This IS banana town sweetheart Fak

“Sup PIMP” PLEEEASE HAHAHA

“He was gonna tell us what he said to Claire”- Richie: “classic behavior dysregulation” PLLLEEASE

“Then I actually take it back, fuck you” i love Richie down

“What’s nunya” “nunya fuckin business” THE WAY IM CRRRY LAUGHINGGGGG LMFAAAAOOOOO THIS IS A GLIMPSE OF HIS CHILDHOOD

The gum chewing is sexy 

“Is that what you did” “no i’m just here if you need anything” oh, Carmy :(

Oh, Marcus :((((((. “Take us there bear” “yes chef” oh my god I’m crying again 

EP2 ; Final Thoughts - Carmen needs to fucking relax and I’m gonna say this probably a lot. Omg the fighting with Richie in this episode was pissing me off they are fighting like catty brothers!!! The moment with Marcus at the end really got to me. This was overall though a hilarious episode

EP3 - “Doors”

Marcus mom funeral!! Awww I’m glad they all are there for him. Thiiis is the moms funeral, ok, so they did it all in one day the shooting for both funerals so we wouldn’t know!!!

I wonder how Carm feels he’s there for Marcus’ mom but wasn’t for his brother 

Wow this speech must be so impactful for Carmy to get a glimpse into someone else’s life like this 

Look alive lizards we are OPENN

Richie is so goooodddd at his job 🥹🫶

For the bear and his honey fans princess cake is 100% going in there hahahah

Hmm things are going a bit too well 

Carmy throwing so much good decent edible food away makes me twitch. 

Carmy and his little edible flowers hahaha I love it

“The rare Transylvanian 5 titted goat?!” CICEROOO HAHAHAH

“Joy” “this is a waste of time, give it to sugar” HAHAHAHA

LMAOOO SINGING HAPPY BDAY IN SPANISH HAHAHA LOVE IT

Fak not putting it ON THE TABLE and Richie being like “keep my mans name out of your mouth “ PLLLELEEEASEE

Something abt Carmy cleaning is so hot

GRAAAHHH THAT PIECE OF BACK SKIN POKING OUT OF HIS SHIRT WHEN HE BENDS OVER

They’re being so too hard on tina :((

Richie is bringing patrons to the kitchen and Carmy is just violently bitching Syd out I am dead also, someone get the belt i’m gonna beat him.

This goes out to everyone who said there’s no chance the bear could fail and that it was a stupid idea it could? (cough- ex moots, cough) ; please tell me why they don’t even have a star and they’re already doing poorly with funds

I can’t- Carmen and Richie are fully going at each others throats and physically fighting.

Please Fak just grilling customers for info.

Carmy is SO little brother and I wanna choke him “we’ll figure it out” “ME?” “I’m trying to use less shiiittt >:(“ like a winey bitch - YOU ARE AN ADULT SHE IS THERE TO HELP YOU YOU LITTLE COCKSUCKER DO YOUR GOD DAMN JOB EFFICIENTLY

Carmy is losing it he needs to be medicated ASAP

Thank GOD Syd is putting her foot down and telling him to shut up

Syd looks fed the fuck up, rightfully

EP3 ; Final Thoughts - Holy shit Carmen is going nuts. Sydcarmy is going so hard rn he needs to finish shit with Claire so he can admit his feelings to himself about Syd. He needs to stop being so mean to her, he is going to cause her to panic. Whats so funny is I drafted Carmy bitching Syd out in my OC fic in the most recent chapter before this even came out (but in my world (in girl world) winnie is behind him chewing his ass out and literally told him he’s acting like his old boss) But it’s funny because hes literally telling her abusive ass shit his boss told him.

EP4 - “Violet”

Ohhhhh to kiss Carmy that way. A dream

The nose kiss oh my god oh my god 

He’s such a good listener 

He is so fucking - oh my god this man. This man. I need him astronomically 

Marcus :(((

I love Syd’s scarf but also lmao the stress of that docu - I get you girl hahah

Yaaaay she’s moving! 

This apartment is stunning!!!

DAD RICHIEEEE AHSHDJSHSHJ EVA OMG CUTIE PATTOOOTIEEE

Him laying with her is so cute. 

“He’s not my uncle like Carmy” 🥹PLS SO CUTE

This is so good such kid convo omgggg kids are just like thissss!! He’s such a good dad omfg playing her handdddd fuckFUCKCJCKCJC expect more Richie content soon

DONNAS GOING TO TIFFS WEDDING OMG!!!!!

Yes daddy TAKE THAT RING OFF YOURE A NEW MAN PAPA 

LMFAOAOAOA THEM SCREAMING HELP

“Maybe you’ve reached as far as your talent can go” makes MY stomach hurt, dawg 

“I feel like Bear is starting to respect me” please the way they look up to him I cantttt lmao

YAY MORE DAD RICHIE 

TAYLOR SWIFT!!!!!!!!!!

This Frank guy is weird- they made a great job at making this feel awkward as fuck.

HE DID INVITE HIM TO THE WEDDING OH GOD

that’s my girl! 

Oh is she about to get poached

Oooo like not Carmy??? Oooooo hes trying to poach her

Marcus has such nicely manicured hands

The way they just stuff snacks in faks mouth to make him go away hahaha love it

Mmhmm this season will make me fall more in love with Richie then ever before

Richie. Richie. Richie. Richie. Richie. Oh my god. My heart is being ripped out 

Wait they’re being reviewed for a star?! Already? They JUST opened! 

EP4 ; Final Thoughts - This was SUCH a Richie episode! I loved it alot :))) <3!!! So many Dad!Richie moments that made me smile. He also almost made me cry with his whole being alone thing. I will remedy my sadness with writing Richie fics literally probably tomorrow because holy holy holy this man I need to give him kissesssssss

EP5 - “Children”

So do the Bears all have the same alarm clocks?

Marcus speech really touched Natalie :((

Carmen doing the boxes by himself HAHAHA its what he deserves!! BAD BOY! 

Syd the ultimate good friend helping Marcus with his moms stuff 

Syd looks so cute her outfit is adorable 

Lmaooo Syd with her dead mom club jokes she’s too funny I see why Carmy is so whipped 

The Bear and His Honey is going to fucking SLAP with this new Carmy content WOW

Him throwing away more food that is perfect literally perfect. *sarcasm*

I wanna leave hickeys on Richie’s neck so bad - it’s so pretty 

Omg Carmys mentor closing the restaurant- he’s spiraling and looking at the every second counts she instilled in him- oh god.. Oh god-

Richie has grown so much im so so proud of him! 

He is crushing on this girl from Ever so hard

IS THAT JOHN CENA?!

JOHN CENA IS A FAK I AM DBHSJABDBEBE HAHAHAHAH

Carmy is gonna get his legs broken if he doesn’t cut it out hahahaha

Fak drinking a Capri-sun LOL

Omgggg him saying to fire Marcus you are CRAZY 

Lmaooo Jimmy venting to syd and saying that carmy has a tree up his ass

Carmy finding baby pics I’m SICK

EP5 ; Final Thoughts - WOWOWOWOW This is the last ep. I am watching tonight I need to digest. This was such a cute Richie ep. I am so in love with Dad!Richie. He is such a good, good dad. I also am dead- John Cena as a Fak? And having a mikey esc. Haircut???? And smoking in the restaurant- and then them saying it smells like smoke I am dead as fuck. Richie really really wants this review to go well, I hope it does:((

EP6 - “Napkins”

Good morning! time for e6 It is Directed by Ayo so i fear it is gonna kill me :) !

Well at least Tina has a normal clock 

Oooo get down on it!!!! Let’s go Tina!!! Get in that groove mama! 

Tina is so Puerto Rican mom I love it so so much 

Tina’s married?! I love it!! how sweet 

If Mikey’s in here- I’m gonna fucking die 

Baker tina!! Oh- customer service Tina? No! Books Tina!!! Smart girl!! that’s my lady :))

NOOOO - WHAT ?! THEY’RE LETTING HER GO?!

THIS IS WHAT LANDED HER AT THE BEEF??? THIS???

Oh Tina I’ve been there mama you’ll land on your feet :((( That’s right baby everything will be ok 

One thing about this show is all of the characters need routine 

The degree thing pisses me off to no end because of how real it is. Like shes been doing this 15 years and knows it better then someone right out of school with a stupid degree.

Awww Tina and hubs been together so long!! So sweet I love it her husband is good to her. 

I sooo love Tina is getting her moment the actress is so kind and amazing 

Woah I thought the big interview would be at the beef LOLLLL like not that it’s big but that they really need her lolll 

Oh my god. They hired someone ??? What the fuck and didnt tell her?!! RUDEEEE 

This little fucking prick oh my god yes Tina fuck him

Aw baby I wanna hug her it’ll be fine mama I know it doesn’t feel like it

Bus is delayed SO SHE COULD APPLY AT THE BEEF HAHAHAHAHA

THERES MY MANNNN RICHIEEE!! HES SO HOT AAAA

“Maam you can’t smoke in here anymore” I can’t hahaha

Everyone calling him handsome I can’t hahah he is! But still hahaha

Omggg richieeee I love him he’s always been so sociallll!! Get ready to eat with the beef Richie oh. Wow. This whole scene is so chef kiss i cant wait to write more the beef!richie

FAKS FAKS FAKS ok where’s Mikey HDBDHAHSHEBDNEBSBD. THERE HE IS IN SHFJENSNSJEJEJENDNEJWKA

MIKEY OH MY GOD JEJSNANQ

RICHIE LMAO STOP THEY ACT HOW IN KNOW THEY WOULDDD

“She can’t be crying in here” I am done LMAO

I fear I’m seeing the Mikey crush AAA “sandwich really that bad??” Stop being funny !! I also see how he got Carmy out of his panic attacks what a brother stop Mikey!! Why would you do that Mikey everyone loved you so muchhh 🥺💔

Gosh Mikey IS so handsome

THE HAUNTED EXPLODING TOILET THAT CARM IS STILL DEALING WITH HAHAHAHA

oh my god Carmy takes after him SO SO SO MUCH oh my god Carmy takes after him so much 

Oh my gosh I didn’t realize she was older then Richie!! 46 means something in this show- did Mikey…at 46? If he did I will fucking sue 

OMG SHOWING HER THE PIC OH ANS TELLING ABOUT CARMY SHUT UP HE “hes the shit” he wasn’t allowed to work at the beef because mikey knew that he’s better then the beef. He sees so much in him I knew that was the case!!! I’m sick 

My god !! Carmy!! Takes!!! After Mikey so fucking MUCH!!! 

Oh Mikey- oh. Mikey. Oh Mikey. Oh Mikey. Oh Michael Berzatto. Hit me while I’m down PAL kick me why don’t you?! “I knew I was gonna get skipped because I had people to take care of” I knew this episode would make me sick. 

oh my god when Tina said she loved Mikey she loved Mikey like a good friend and I am so gutted when Carmy says everyone loved Mikey and he just lit a room up and could make anyone comfortable oh my god I’m so gutted!!!!!!!!!!! 

EP6 ; Final Thoughts - This episode let us truly meet Michael & oh my god it’s almost painful to watch these back to back like- this is a lot to digest holy fuck. When Carmen talked about a temp in a room and how Mikey could feel it then lean into it and manipulate it however he wanted. He did such a good job portraying that. I’d give anything for him to have just called Carmy when he was on that bridge and for him to have answered and for Carmy to change his mind. Oh my god I’m so- like oh my god? This show. I can’t.

EP7 - “Legacy”

Carmy so pretty :)

Oh Richie. Thinking about :((( everything. 

Syd thinking of Carmy 

SHE IS GETTING POACHED BY EVER MAN OH NO

good Carmy is back at AI-ANON 

so much fucking family hahahah god I love Italians hey uncle Gary! 

*sighs* good morning, Syd. 

Oh. Ok he’s opening his own place ok…and he’s asking her I KNEW IT POACHER!! POACHER!!!!!

oh my god he’s offering her a real CDC job - with a real good salary,  it would be healthier for her sadly!!!!!!

How’d I headcanon Carmy knew French PUUUURRIODD 😌

“You look nice” ha. Ha. Ha.  Shoot me in the FUCKING FACE

The gum chewing HNNNNG IM CHEWING ON MY CAGE

“That sounds legendary pal” I WANT TO KISS HIM ON HIS STUPID MOUTH 

ARE THEY PART TIME THE BEEF NOW?!! OH MY GOD- THEY ARE!!! EBRA IS LIVINGGGG HAHAH OMG THIS IS SO COOL???

“Matter of fak supply” LOL

Richie is taking this so seriously which makes me more mad how Carmy treats him like he really is so good at the job and loves it.

Aw he really misses Tiff. :( he’s so different now and wishes he could go back so bad but he’s gonna find someone that I’ll be very jealous of bc I need this man SO BAD

Oh him crying abt Mikey- no stop I can’t 

SYDS TURN IN THE BOXESS HAHAHAH

“Hey grandpa” “hey grandma” I love Ebra and Tina sm lol and her mimicking his accent they’re adorable 

“Maybe you can go fuck, Ted” hahahaha I love telling people to go fuck now 

Eva’s drawing in Richie’s host book 🥹🫶

Carmen I wanna choke you out so bad!  Can you take a single suggestion ???

THE BABY IS COMING :D!!!!

EP7 ; Final Thoughts - Another good episode!! Very balanced which I like, the character centered episodes feel very heavy but I still love them. I'm just happy that we got a little bit of a second to breathe!! I think it’s cool how they’re doing the beef on the side, like so cool! I never thought of that as an option. Because it’s true the neighborhood would probably miss their local sandwich spot! I liked this episode a lot :) Carmy can go fuck this episode, though he’s in the dog house and I hope Syd leaves to teach him a lesson! (& it makes him realize he loves her!!!)

EP8 - “Ice Chips”

I’m guessing before we start Nat is gonna find comfort not in her brother, but in Syd! 

Oh poor Nat all alone :( PETE ANSWER THE PHONE- SYD ANSWER -CARMY ANSWER !!! SOMEONE ANSWERRRRR

CLAIRE SHES FINDING COMFORT IN CLAIRE. NO HER MOM!!! OH MY GOD OH DONNAAAAAA WHAT 

oh my god Donna SUGAR oh my god sugar snapping on Donna I can’t 

COACHING. SHES BEING A MOM HAHAHAH PLEASEE 

someone get someone here other then Donna 

My Scorpio sissy Natalie !!! 11/10/88 (this confirms to me carmy is still in his 20s theres no way hes 33 when nat is 34)

Donna needs to leave this is the worst she’s the worst birth partner ever 

At least Donna is being nice 

She never told her mom she was pregnant??? Wow!

Donna’s labor with Carmy being so incredibly hard is honestly canon! That is so funny actually. Yeah that kid makes everything hard for himself! 

lol you get that epidural queen!!!

I’m glad Donna is hearing that she scared them as children. 

Donna is an alcoholic because her mother had problems

Ok I’m feeling Donna sympathy 

Oh a mothers love. Please STOP THIS I DONT WANN A FEEL BAD FOR DONNA 

EP8 ; Final Thoughts - wow. Wowowowowowowowow 0 Carmy and 0 Richie basically but this was nats episode and Donna’s! I am happy we were able to see the sweet side of Donna, I think (and hope !!) she is on the right path to sobriety!!! This episode was very tender , I loved hearing about their childhoods more <3 Nat is gonna be a good mommy!!!

EP9 - “Apologies”

Magic? Ok sick, ok Marcus!! That’s who was watching this ok then wonder what thats about?

“Claire is peace” please- the thought of her gives you a panic attack. 

He’s gonna apologize this episode Jesus we wasted a whole season still no sydcarmykiss. It’s ok guys stay strong we’ll be there next season 

Yes Syd leave him 

Carmen you are nuts!!! 

Richie and Carmy staring at eachother through the window like bears about to kill eachother is freaking me out.

Syd say it -

Oh wait it’s the funeral for ever lol! I forgot that’s the funeral. Ok not worried 

He goes to the walk in to try to make it in his mind like he hasn’t waited all this time to apologize hahahaha 

AND RIGHT TO SYD AND THE AGREEMENNT I DJSJEBDJSJEHSHWHSBD SYDCARMY TILL I dIEEEE

“Missing one, that wouldn’t the the thing happened to be wedged up your ass the last few weeks is it?” JIMMYYYYY HAHAHAHAHAHA

Jesus this man’s eyes literally glow blue 

He owes him sooo much money wow 

Tina and Marcus are so cute

Carmy and his drawings are adorable 

Ten minutes left and Carmy hasn’t said sorry lol 

His little smile at the farm AAAA

Syd ls bringing them food before Carmy 

No she’s right Carmy I’m sorry why wouldn’t it be immediate insurance what is … wrong with you?

Oh my god fak going to see Claire Fak leave now no no no no no no no no oh my god this is so bad 

Mommy Nat 🥹💖

Aw Carmy looking at mikes funeral card 😭💔

EP9 ; Final Thoughts - Why does this season not feel done?! Well prob because they’re gonna do a season 4. But still there’s no way they can finish all of this in one episode. Holy moly the Faks need to stop interfering this is so bad!!!! Too many Faks!! Ok I can’t last episode time AAA

E10 - “Forever” !!!!!!

This mentor I like very much 

He took the popes nose thing from this mentor hahaha

This man who mentored Carmy it’s understandable why he was so driven or like, inspired to keep going

LUCAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA LUCAAA LUCA LUCA LUCA LUCA

LUCA LUCA HES SO CUTE HRJJEJSJEJDNDJSNSNS “is that injected? Or is it…oh..ok” CUTE SHY EMBARASSED LUCAAAAAA

OMG CARMY MINGLING GOOD BOY!!!

Richie is crushing on Jess hard 

Luca oh baby I wanna kiss himmm oh him 

SYDYFBDNANA. SYD SYD SYD SYD CARMY IS GONNA EXPLODE 

oh my fid oh my god oh my god oh my god his boss his his oh my god 

Oh my god oh m y god “working for a bad boss is the worst because the culture you’re a part of is the culture you create” Carmen is spiraling rn (the next chapter of my oc fic is gonna go crazy)

Syd being more sociable then Carmy bc Carmy is panicking 

This smug bastard loves that he makes Carmen squirm I wanna punch him

“This is why you’re alone you can’t handle this” I’m going to fucking stab something

Carmy finds 0 joy in cooking anymore. 

Richie is so lovable the boss loves him and knew him for less then a week hahahahah

Carmy OH CARMY CARMY CARMY OH CARMY  “generally being you” my jaw is my jaw my jaw my jaw my jaw my jaw on THE FLOOOOORRRRRRRRRR. Oh my god. He’s such this asshole boss I hope he dies holy fuck HOW DARE HE HOW DARE HE HOW DARE HE HOW DARE HE. I WANT TO PEEL OFF HIS SKIN

Luca and Syd??? Ok- I say go for it queen

My mind is blown so far this is so amazing but also how the fuck hasn’t he sorted with Claire and S3 is closing???

Omg after party at SYDS?! Where is Carmy??? literally Marcus and Tina are there and the Faks?? He has to be seeing Claire there’s no way why would he miss out on this!!!!

If only Carmy got to be apart of something fun. Of course he’d deprive himself. OF COURSE

He is… giving Syd ptsd like his boss did to him. She is having done to her what was done to him.

Oh Syd. Oh Syd. Oh you need to get out of there baby it’s killing you. I hate seeing her upset its hurting me.

Their review was bad…. :((((((((((((

YES I KNEW ITTTTTT!! TO BE CONTINUED !!!!! ASDFGHJKLASDFGHJKL

EP10/S3 ; Overall Final Thoughts -

IM CRYING omggggg omg omg omg omg omg omg the whole thing with the boss had me in actual tears. TB&HH is about to eat so hard so so hard oh I have so many ideas AAAA and I’m so in love w Richie even more then last season he is totally crushing on Jess. Oh my god syd needs to get out of the bear Carmy is actually killing her. He is doing to her what his boss did to him and that’s evil!!! Evil evil. Oh my god so many thoughts I have but wow just wow. I can’t most of all wait to read the rest of the fandoms thoughts WOW my fics are about to eat I’m so inspired ALSO SydCarmy fics are about to be so angsty and eeeeeaaaatttttt!! He is slowly killing his girl, also - him being able to say sorry to syd but not claire??? I’m mad that the Faks had so much screentime like they were funny sometimes sure, but waywaaay too much faks. Not enough Nat, not enough MARCUS!! The most powerful touching scene or at least most inspiring of the season for me was the one with carmy & his old boss the sack of shit, that scene is gonna propel tb&hh so farrrr also this whole season is going to! Im so excited to keep writing that. I see people are not liking this season in my peeks on my home page (i didnt want to taint my thoughts) but im kinda surprised - like yes we didn’t wrap everything up & there were too many faks and not enough syd BUT the cinematography was stunning, and we got to see in carmys head which is what i predicted - this season was to get in his head to see 2 main things 1) how he does what he does 2) why he is how he is - and we got both of those answers, I think everyone was expecting this to be the last season and it was never going to be! In order to wrap this up we had to fully understand why carmen is how he is, are you all catching my drift here? I cant wait for S4!!! I feel it that SydCarmy will happen, I know that chefkids will put it in to words because their brain is much bigger then mine - but wow wow and wow. I’m gonna have to watch each episode 10 more times to digest it but wow. Loved it! MOST OF ALL I CANT WAIT FOR S4!!!!!! AAAAA

[gravehags]

you send me - the natalie edit

Pairing: Cardinal Copia x OC (Curator!OC)

Rating: Teen

Tags: terzo being terzo, copia snapping, secondo is a shit head, primo is just trying to play a nice game of uno, introductions

Words: 1,082

Summary: She's never met a Satanic pope before. He sure is something.

a/n: i should have had copia beat terzo's ass lmao

~~~

“Son of a bitch,” Natalie spits, watching a paper from the stack she’s holding drift towards the floor and under the table she’s working at.

With a frustrated noise, she slams the stack on the surface and gets down on her hands and knees to retrieve it. The paper, of course, has landed a couple feet away, causing her to crawl underneath the heavy piece of furniture. Her fingers just about have it when she hears a low chuckle from behind her. It startles her so much that she jerks her head, slamming it into the hard surface above her.

“Fuck!” she hisses, trying her best to clamber off the ground and confront whoever is watching her. When she finally stands, straightening her skirt, her eyes land on a most peculiar figure. He’s slight, wearing a black and white suit. Jet black hair, parted in the center of his head, frames a face covered in paint designed to look like a stylized skull. The paint isn’t odd to her - she has of course seen Cardinal Copia’s paints - but somehow he seems more important than anyone she has met thus far at the abbey.

“You’re staring, bella,” he purrs in a seductive voice, “am I so very nice to look at?”

Jesus. Natalie fumbles over her introduction, sticking out a hand for him to shake. He takes it within both of his own white gloved hands and pulls her closer to him.

“I,” he begins, “am called Terzo Emeritus. You may call me ‘Terzo’ if you like. Or perhaps ‘Papa’, if you’re into that,” he says with an exaggerated wink.

“Huh…? Oh shit you’re him? You’re the Satanic pope? I am so sorry, your…unholiness.”

He looks like he’s trying to stifle a laugh as he continues to squeeze her hands in his.

“No need for titles, bella,” he whispers conspiratorially. “Whatever you call me, I’m all yours.”

Somehow he’s gotten even closer to her, so much so that she can smell the hair product he uses. She’s about to say something awkward when behind Terzo she sees a flash of red.

“Cardinal!” Natalie half-shouts as he approaches, a frown on his face. “Thank God you’re…I mean…we were just…”

“Capisco, Signorina Sinclair. I understand exactly what is happening here. How good of Papa to visit his new employee.”

The look in Copia’s mismatched eyes - funny how they both have those eyes - is positively venomous. Odd. Terzo steps away from Natalie and slaps Copia on the back with surprising force, causing him to jolt forward.

“Cardinale, your timing as always is impeccable,” he croons with a grin toying at his lips. “I am quite impressed with your bellissima curatore you’ve been going on about for weeks now, eh?”

Natalie flushes and looks down at her feet. Copia’s been talking about her? When she looks back up he’s as red as she is, staring daggers at Terzo who has a beatific smile on his face.

“We will have to chat again soon, bella Natalia,” Terzo says in that low voice once more. Copia’s eye twitches.

“Of course, thank you for stopping by Terzo.”

He gives her a lingering smile before turning on his heel and brushing past Copia, who is still standing there looking annoyed.

“Shall we begin?” Natalie says softly, gesturing to the pile of papers on the table. He blinks and the sour expression is gone, looking at her with kind eyes.

“Sì, Signorina Sinclair. Let us get to work.”

—-

“There he is!” Terzo crows from his spot at the round table. Copia walks in, removing his biretta and tossing it on a side table. Secondo has a foul grin on his lips and Primo looks exhausted.

“I was just about to tell them about the new curatore,” he announces, as Copia takes the seat next to him, shoulders tense.

“Well go on,” Secondo says, tapping his cigar on the ashtray in front of him. Terzo makes a dramatic fainting motion and Secondo waggles his eyebrows.

“Beautiful,” Terzo says, breathless. “Paffuta.” He makes a lewd squeezing motion with his hands and Copia’s gloves squeak as he balls his own hands into fists. Primo is watching him quietly from his side of the table but says nothing. “Matura,” Terzo continues with a growl.

Secondo blows a stream of smoke out of his nose and makes a thoughtful noise.

“I’ll have to see her myself. Perhaps she prefers someone older,” he says with a faint sneer. Terzo scoffs and lightly slams his fists on the table.

“You should have seen the way she was looking at me today fratellino,” he begins, “Wide eyes, fluttering long dark lashes and everything. Positively smitten.”

Secondo rolls his eyes. “Maybe she’ll like Primo, eh?” He leans over and nudges the brother in question who is still silently observing Copia. “He can tend her garden.”

The two brothers erupt in raucous laughter. Copia has heard enough.

“Silenzio!” he shouts, banging his hands on the table and rising. “Do not speak of her as if she is some sibling you can fuck and then discard!” 

Primo lets out a deep sigh while Secondo gently sets his cigar in the ashtray. Terzo, however, looks entirely too pleased with himself.

“I knew it,” he whispers, “I knew you were besotted with her!”

Copia opens his mouth to say something, but finds himself at a loss.

“The way you went on and on and on about her for weeks before she even moved in. I knew it!” Secondo chuckles and Primo looks disappointed.

“Terzo,” he begins quietly, “you could have simply asked him instead of riling him up.”

“Eh, this was more fun,” he says, waving a hand dismissively at his brother. Copia is still standing and fidgeting with his hands. He wants to speak up and deny it but finds the lie offensive. Sensing his anxiety, Primo speaks up again.

“Why don’t you bring her to us, Copia? I would very much like to meet her.”

Copia nods, still fidgeting.

“Sì…sì, I will. She is…” he falters for a moment, trying to search for the appropriate word, “Kind. I have not known her long but from what I have seen she is…lovely.”

His face is practically glowing at this point as Terzo cat calls and then is harshly cut short by Primo laying a firm slap to his arm.

“Looking forward to meeting this kind curatore,” Secondo comments, once again picking up his cigar. “Does she like bolognese?”

Huh. He doesn’t know. Copia plans to ask her the next time they meet.

[yezzyyae]

I hate Sydney Adamu so much I made my mom stay up 12am this morning so I can explain everything I hate about it! I really hate Sydney I hate how ppl make her out to be this savior or how she makes Carmy better which the fuck she don’t! Carmy did not need help from Sydney he was grieving his relationship with Mickey & his suicide. Dealing with “The Beef” which is a family restaurant but Sydney came in being this arrogant person that Carmy needed her help! Carmy didn’t need help with the menu or the design of the restaurant. I don’t know why Sydney is even there acting like he needs to call her for every approval. Only Natalie & Jimmy & Carmy needs to communicate because they are the ones with the money. Not Sydney talking about she wants a “star” fuck her! Well go open your own restaurant Sydney & get your star ⭐️ fucking weirdo! Carmy needs to put his foot down & fire Sydney she can’t handle pressure, she oversteps Carmy’s boundaries(involving Claire), and she is not respectful to Richie at all! I don’t root for Sydney at all & I am a 34 y/o BLACK WOMAN FROM Philadelphia! Sydney is not a good person she is hurt that’s why she came in the restaurant hurting Richie & even hurting Carmy by putting pressure on him. Smh she don’t respect anyone’s boundaries but want hers respected! And Sydney can’t cook I stand by it name one meal she made that everybody liked smh not one time!

Carmy don’t even know she stalked his whole career & life! She lied when she was asked “why she want to work there” she is a creepy weirdo! Even her not telling Carmy that her mom is dead when she was talking about the annual dinner her & her father have is soo weird! Like Sydney wtf why imply that your mother is still alive she is a weirdo! I hate her character and everything she stand for smh 2 seasons of a headache!

And her vomiting 🤮 at the end of season 2 episode 10 better for her health and not some anxiety effect cause that’s just corny! She better be sick & not like anxiety took over her so much that night when she didn’t do anything but watch everything Carmy did which is not her job. Sydney is the CDC so that means Carmy can be anywhere do anything he wants but she have to have control of the restaurant w/out being a weirdo and questioning Carmy about why he going to Claire’s table 😡that made me soo pissed and when he told her to refire the “7 fishes” she argued back with him & he said “I’m sorry” 1st not her but 5 mins before she was arguing with Tina and didn’t think Tina should say anything back to her & do what she say. I am so confused how Sydney think Carmy can’t confront her or challenged esp in the kitchen it’s disrespectful to him & it’s weird. Every woman is not always correct I’m tired of them trying to make Sydney like she is the only sane person! She is disrespectful to Carmy esp in the kitchen she always saying something back always!

Carmy is one of the best chefs in the world and Sydney only had a catering business & she is impatient & green! I don’t understand why ppl think Carmy needs Sydney to be better. Smh it’s disrespectful to Carmy’s skills and accomplishments! Carmy got stuck in the walk in because he was arguing with Sydney then he had to say “I’m sorry” 1st. Smh which is not fair because when Carmy say something in the kitchen nobody should challenge him esp NOT FUCKING SYDNEY!

Sydney have no respect for Carmy! Sydney knows she can take advantage of Carmy. Smh Carmy deserves better his mind is already fragile. Sydney never gave him a hug or said “I’m sorry about your loss” so how is everybody so in love with Sydney. And Carmy had every right to scream & yell at Sydney for not being prepared & forgetting about the tab on the “pre-order” option! Sydney never accepts responsibility for her actions it’s annoying! Now a person can stab a person at work because Sydney is black which is bullshit because Carmy sent Richie to help make the sauce and Sydney being a bitch that she is & mad that Carmy finally saw her mistake took it out on Richie which is fucked up but nobody seems to see that!

[ratcatcher0325]

Natalie don't show Alexander this ask. Pick him up and put him I'm a teacup without saying anything and walk away.

Omfg, Anon, you are an evil genius. I love you. He’s gonna be so befuddled. Let’s see, what is he up to right now?? Awww, it looks like he’s just stretching awake from a nap. He’s much more sleepy nowadays. I’m pretty sure the medication makes him drowsy. And besides, he desperately needs the rest to start recovering. He’s all snuggled up in some fuzzy jacket of mine. Good morning, Alexander. See, he has the deceptive appearance of being adorably sweet in like the first 45 seconds of waking up… oh and now he just bitched at me because “it’s insufferably warm in here! What have you done with the heater??” Even though the reason I made it warmer was because he was shivering a little bit ago and wouldn’t let me cuddle him for warmth. Let alone the fact that he’s freaking bundled up so of course he’s hot right now!! *sigh*… welcome to my life, Anon. Okay, onto the fun part and messing with this little nightmare…

I’ll make it cooler in here, Your Majesty, I’m so sorry. I should’ve known you’d wake up hot and anticipated turning it down beforehand, that’s on me….

He just pursed his lips and is avoiding eye contact.

Hey, you wanna help me with something in the kitchen, really quick? It’ll just be a minute, I promise. You awake enough for that?

He just rubbed his little bloodshot eyes and nodded, still stretching to wake himself up. He’s so cute like this, Anon, I wish there wasn’t all the attitude to counterbalance it. I just scooped him up and headed for the kitchen. I opened up the cabinets with my free hand and brought out my frilliest, floral tea cup and saucer I could find, I think it came from my great-grandma or something….

He just asked me if I’m making tea! I responded with “Kinda, sure…”

And then carefully plopped him down into the center of the cup. His brow instantly furrowed, and he looked up at me questioningly, as he gripped the lip of the cup, all defensive.

Before he had a chance to start shouting at me, I delicately lifted the cup and raised it for a toast, the little man sliding around a tiny bit inside.

Cheers, Alexander! Guess what?? The internet made me do it!

His whole face just turned scarlet, Anon! But right as he sucked in a breath to let me have it, I pulled the cup close and and gave him a little kiss on his hair. When I put the cup back down into the saucer, the little nightmare suddenly got very quiet. I wonder what he’s thinking as he stares off into the middle distance? I’m busying myself tidying up the living room, little thing hasn’t said a word.

I feel bad just leaving him in there though, I’ll go pluck him up after I finish writing this to you. Maybe by then he’ll have recovered and I’ll get the earful I know I’m in for.

Thanks for the suggestion! We sent Alexander on quite the rollercoaster of emotions!

Love,

Natalie

[tabithatwo]

do you actually like anything about this season?

Yes!! I have made plenty of posts throughout the season that are about things I like! The exploration of Shauna’s psychosis and tbh most of natalie’s story 96 and 21 hits for me and hot milf rich bitch lottie and Shauna’s I love murder spree and everything callie and tai van 96 and 21 have been largely great moments that hit so good for me and the exploration we do get of tais sight and lottie nat tai jackie leadership parallels and juxtapositions and etc etc etc.

If I didn’t like anything about the show I wouldn’t be here lmao. But the posts I’ve made talking about WHY I don’t like the things I don’t like have gotten a lot of attention. Often because other people feel this way and don’t know how to say it or feel alone in it or afraid to talk about it because people FLIP FUCKING SHIT ON YOU lol. I don’t comment on peoples posts or reblog their posts to disagree with them. If they like an aspect I don’t then I think that’s great. I put my own thoughts on my own blog because I can talk about whatever the fuck I want, things you love are not above criticism, disappointment is fucking real, so on and so forth.

I’m gonna take this in good faith because it isn’t overtly hostile but if you’re sending overtly hostile asks they’re just getting deleted lmao I got a wild hair and replied to one (not THIS one but one before this to be clear!) but that’s all I’m not gonna feed you and I’m gonna keep posting whatever the fuck I want <3

(Edit to say anon saw your second ask thank you for being genuine and curious I figured you probably were which is why I answered this one in particular <3 sorry your ask got used to explain the ways other people are behaving lol I had like 20 in a row and yours was the one that seemed genuine and not in the range of rude to literal threats lmao people are So Normal about this stuff!! Thanks for clarifying <3)

[aestheticaltcow]

Two Months

Carmy really fucked up, but maybe he can prove his worthiness and get his girls back.

MDNI 18+

The Bear Masterlist

Previous part Next part

Carmy sighed when his call went to voicemail after a few rings. He pushed a hand through his hair and listened to your voicemail message, “Hey baby- I just wanted to know if I could see Mia. I know you don’t want to see me, but I need to see her… if you could just bring her by the restaurant, that would be fine. I just want to hold my daughter. Uh- yeah. I’m sorry, I’m a fuckin’ dumbass. Please just give me five minutes to explain everything. Let me know. I love you.” he hung up the phone and leaned back in his chair. He stared up at the ceiling as he thought about you and Mia. It had been a couple of weeks since he’d seen either of you, and he just needed his girls again. 

“Asshole. Sign here.” Natalie barked at Carmy as she entered the office with an ordering forum. She shoved the papers at him before crossing her arms over her chest. “Natalie, I get it okay. I fucked up. My wife kicked me out of our house, I’m living in a shitty hotel, and I haven’t seen my daughter in weeks. I’m not in the fucking mood to deal with your bitching.” Carmy replied, glaring at his sister. She rolled her eyes, “You turned out so much like Dad.” she laughed, yanking the documents back. Carmy huffed, “Fuck you.”

“Right back at you, Carmen,” Natalie said, slamming the door behind her as she exited the office. “You okay, Sugar?” Richie questioned softly, noticing the anger in her eyes. She rolled her eyes and pushed past him without saying anything; being in the same vicinity as Carmy was irritating. Whenever she saw his face, she thought of Mia and how Carmy had repeated their father's actions. Natalie sighed when she got into her car, “I’m sorry you had to hear that, baby… let’s go get your brother.”

~

“Hey, Carm- everything okay with Y/N?” Richie awkwardly asked as Carmy was doing prep for that night's dinner service. “What do you think fuckhead?” Carmy snarkily responded; Richie rolled his eyes and decided to match his energy. “Well, she texted Tiff asking for her DIVORCE LAWYER’S info.” he leaned against the counter with a shit-eating grin. Carmy slammed his knife down and pushed past Richie to go into the alley. “That was fucked up, kid.” Tina scolded as she exited the walk-in. Richie shrugged, “I was going to be subtle, but he’s being a little bitch.” 

Carmy closed his eyes, fighting back tears when Syd showed up for prep. “Hey Carmen, are you okay?” she asked, stepping closer. He shook his head and let out a puff of air, “Y/N’s gonna leave me- I fuckin’ deserve it, but I want my wife Sydney. She won’t even fuckin’ talk to me, but she’ll fuckin’ divorce me? It’s bullshit.” Carmy cried to her. Syd stood there for a moment to collect her thoughts. She swallowed before sitting down next to him and pat Carmy’s shoulder as she began to explain her point of view on the situation, “You fucked up, Carmen. But you love Y/N and Mia- just go. Go home. I’ll cover tonight. Go talk to your wife.” 

Carmy took Syd’s suggestion. He wasn’t sure if you’d let him in or even talk to him, but he knew he should at least try.

~

“I don’t know Natalie. I just… I mean- I’m gonna sound like a dumb bitch, but maybe I could?” you groaned into your phone as Natalie was about to answer the doorbell rung. “Hey Nat, can I call you back in a bit? Someone’s here.” you waited for her passive agreement and hung up. You put your phone in your back pocket and went to the front door. You felt your stomach flip when you opened the door to reveal Carmy standing in your doorway. He was an unshaven mess, with messy curls and dark circles under his eyes. “Carmen? What are you doing here?” you questioned, bracing the door, hoping it would prevent him from entering your once-shared house. “You’re divorcing me?” he asked on the brink of tears. You sighed, “I asked Tiffany for her lawyer's information- that’s all.” 

“Y/N, you can’t leave me without giving me a chance to make things right.” Carmy pleaded. You sucked your teeth, “Carmen, I really don’t want to talk about this right now… Mia’s asleep, but you can come in and say goodnight if you want.” you offered as you pulled your sleeves over your hands. Carmy nodded furiously, “I-I, ye-yes, please.”

Carmy stared down at Mia’s sleeping body. She was splayed across her crib in a green onesie with a pacifier to match. Carmy swallowed as he watched her legs twitch. “She doesn’t like sleep sacks anymore?” he asked softly. You nodded before answering, “She decided it was her own personal hell a couple weeks ago, so now she’s a big girl.” 

Carmy laughed softly and put his hand on Mia’s cheek. She squirmed and leaned into his hand, “I love you, princess.”

You walked Carmy out of the nursery and into the hallway by the front door, “Can we talk?” Carmy asked, trying not to burst into tears and lock himself in the nursery. You nodded, “Okay. What do you want to talk about?” 

Carmy swallowed. “I know you hate me, but I need to see Mia.” He took a quick breath before continuing, “Y/N, please don’t keep my daughter from me. I’ll give you whatever you want. I just need to see my daughter.” Carmy sniffled as he wiped his eyes. 

Guilt. When you saw the hurt on his face, you knew what you had to do. “Next time I need someone to watch her, I’ll call you.” you offered, Carmy grinned and thanked you before starring at you with the same love and admiration he always had. He turned to walk back to his car but stopped in the middle of the yard, “I love you. I’m gonna win you back.” he pushed a hand through his hair before shoving them in his jacket pockets. You rolled your eyes, “Bye Carmen. Drive safe.” 

~

The flu hit your office like a semi-truck. Everyone got sick, including you, and taking care of a sick baby proved more complicated than you’d thought. No one could help you, so reluctantly, you called Carmy to come be with Mia that night. He was over the moon but tried to play it cool, you saw it through immediately. It was sweet in a cheesy, trying too hard kind of way.

“Hey baby, I brought you pastina soup and Tylenol.” he grinned, handing you a paper bag, “Thank you, Carmen.” you were short with him. Carmy noticed but chopped it up to you being sick, “I can make you some tea.” he offered as you walked back to your bedroom. “I’m fine, Carmen. Please just watch Mia,” you said over your shoulder before closing the bedroom door behind you. You wanted to be mad at him, but it was hard when he was so thoughtful… and handsome. He cleaned himself up since the last time you saw him.

Carmy sat back on the couch, making funny faces at Mia. She squealed and grabbed the air in Carmy’s direction. “I missed you so much, princess.” he laughed as he brought her up to his chest; he rubbed her back as she tried to hug him. “Okay, let's check on Mommy and then make some dinner. Daddy missed his favorite sous.” Carmy explained as he got up. The two walked down the hallway, Mia babbling away as Carmy adjusted her in his arms. He bumped the bedroom door open with his hip and saw you peacefully sleeping. He stepped into the bedroom and grabbed the trash from your side table. Mia grumbled as the two of you exited the room; Carmy chuckled and kissed her temple. “I know, princess. I wanna snuggle with Mommy too, but she doesn’t feel well… and hates me, but we’ll figure it out.”

You abruptly woke up around midnight when you heard talking through the baby monitor. You stumbled out of your bedroom and across the hall to the nursery; the door was askew, and as you approached it, you more clearly heard Carmy’s voice. He was laying on the floor next to Mia’s crib, “My little Mia… I wish you could stay this little forever.” he whispered as he put his hand up to the crib gate. The sight alone made your heart yearn for your family to be back together. You knew what you had to do.

~

“And that princess is how you make scrambled eggs, the right way.” you laughed when you overheard Carmy’s cooking lesson. You walked into the kitchen and saw Carmy plating up scrambled eggs, “Hey.” you greeted as you got a mug from the cabinet. Carmy grinned in your direction, “Mornin’ baby. Feelin’ better?” 

“Feelin’ waaaaaaay better,” you started, “Thanks for coming over to take care of her. I really appreciate it.”. Carmy leaned against the counter, “I’m her Dad- it’s my job.”

“You’re a good one… I don’t know where you’ve been staying, but if you want, I uh- I made up the guest room if you want to come home…” you explained, “I feel like I’ve been keeping Mia from you, and that’s fucked up.” you rocked on your heels hoping Carmy wouldn’t assume this offer meant you wanted to get back together. He nodded immediately, “I would love that.” Carmy was giddy at the idea of getting to be with Mia every day again- it also gave him an opportunity to win you back.

It had only been a few days since Carmy had been back home, and he jumped right back into the daily hustle and went above and beyond what he usually did. Carmy changed his schedule and managed to do a lot of his restaurant owner duties at home so that he could be with Mia more. The house was clean, the pantry was stocked with all your favorite snacks, home-cooked meals, and a very happy baby, and it drove you crazy.

“I just- this man is driving me insane.” you ranted as you sipped your margarita. It was girls’ night out with Syd and Natalie. You were two margaritas in and deep in your feelings. “I should just forgive-” you were cut off by Natalie exclaiming, “NO! You can’t just forgive him, Y/N. He’s a fuckin’ idiot for even thinking about being with another woman. It makes all his ‘you make me a better man’ vows bullshit. Our Dad used to do the same shit to Donna all the time- and she just accepted it! Then he left her. I don’t want Carmy to do the same to you- he already fuckin’ started doing it.”

You were taken aback by Natalie’s ranting and raving; you’d known that Carmy had a difficult relationship with his Dad, but you hadn’t known the full extent. You looked at Syd, wanting her to weigh in on the situation, “Carmy’s an asshole, but he’s your asshole. He loves you. He loves Mia. I don’t know if he’ll do it again - if my partner pulled something like this on me, I think I’d hear them out.”

It was almost 10 when Carmy had finally managed to get Mia to fall asleep. He was exhausted after a long day, but when he’d gone into your bedroom to get the baby monitor, he couldn’t help but notice a satin black thong sitting on the top of the laundry hamper. He stared at the underwear for a moment before shaking his head. He wasn’t going to take his wife’s dirty underwear. Carmy walked toward the door before pausing and going back to the hamper. “I guess I am that guy,” he scoffed, grabbing the panties and putting them in the pocket of his sweatpants. 

Carmy lay in bed leaning against a pile of pillows, scrolling through the private folder on his photo app. “There it is…” he mumbled as he tapped the video before putting his headphones in. “You promise no one else will see this, right?” your voice flooded Carmy’s ears as he pushed his sweats off. “Of course not, baby.” he reassured you as your hands reached for his zipper. He watched as you bit your lip and unzipped his pants. Carmy groaned as he watched you give him a blow job. Carmy took the underwear he’d stolen from your bedroom and started stroking himself. The sensation reminded him of when he’d tease you before relentlessly fucking you into a crying mess. 

“Oh fuck-” Carmy exhaled as he felt his orgasm approaching. He swiped to the next video of riding him. Carmy salivated at the sight of your bouncing tits. You were moaning his name as your movements got more frantic, “Cream all over my fuckin’ cock, baby.” 

“That was a fun night,” you said startling Carmy, he dropped his phone before quickly covering himself with a blanket as you stood in the doorway. You giggled at his reaction, you were just going to ask how Mia was before going to bed but catching Carmy masturbating with your underwear… blame it on the alcohol but you wanted a taste.

“I uh- I didn’t hear you- hear you come inside.” Carmy stumbled over his words as you fully entered the guest room. “No need for you to be embarrassed, Carmy…” he watched with wide eyes as you moved around the bed to sit next to him on the bed. You sighed and pushed the blanket off his lap to expose him.

You pushed your hand up Carmy’s thigh, making him swallow hard. “What made you so hard, baby? Were you being a little perv… jacking off with my dirty panties… watching a video of me sucking your cock?” you mewled as you ran your fingers along his thigh. Carmy nodded as he stared into your eyes. You giggled and grasped the base of his length. He croaked as you started to stroke him, “You like that baby?” you asked cocking your head to the side, staring up at him. He nodded as he let his head fall back against the headboard.

Carmy whimpered as you ran your tongue along the bottom of his cock. You swirled your tongue around his leaking tip, making him swear under his breath. As you took more of him in your mouth, his whimpers turned to whiny moans. You pulled away with a pop. Carmy stared down at you, watching a string of saliva connect your lips to the head of his cock. “Does that feel nice, baby?” you asked as you returned to pumping your hand around him. “So-so nice,” he replied, touching your cheek. You smiled as you pushed it away.

“But, why should I suck your cock if you’re gonna let just any woman off the street suck it?” you asked. Carmy shook his head, “Only-only you, baby-y.” he shuddered.

“Only me? Tell me, Carmen, who does this cock belong to?” he was putty in your hands as you slowed your pace. “You, baby, only you.” he groaned, “Prove it.” you challenged.

Carmy buried his face in the crook of your neck as he slowly pressed into your entrance as you lamented at the familiar sensation. You held onto Carmy’s shoulders as he started thrusting his hips in a steady rhythm, “Hmm, Carmy…” you hummed as he hungrily kissed your neck.

“I don’t deserve you baby…”

Tag List @namjoons-crabssss @sl-ut @thottae @cuddlehye @prurose @1184p @chaoticfanficfanx @ok-boke @literatureluster @bxtchopolis @americanprometheuss @buckystwilight @earth-elemental18 @thebearlily @siren-melodies @thel0v3hashira143 @innercreationflower @unpoqu1todetodo @thehouseofevangelista @pizzaspirits @aleemendoza2425-blog @visualbutterflysworld

[anouraborealis]

Itsy Bitsy Spider

Hi, I am a new writer who wrote this more as an exercise than a serious story. I’m trying to find a good balance of goofy and good storytelling, and I think I did a solid job. Enjoy!

CW: A lot of smut

Alyssa is working her boring ass 9-5 desk job. Her popular and wickedly handsome coworker, Jerry, approaches. "Hey Alyssa, Heard you in the bathroom from my cubicle. It sounded like you were frying chicken in there, wanna grab dinner?" He asks. She's flustered, put on the spot, and feels disgusting. "Sorry Jerry, I need to visit my dying mother, all the nights every night." she replies Ay Well then I hope that old wicked bitch of the west dies, am I right for am I right?" “Haha Jerry you're so silly."

Allysa had pulled the plug two weeks ago... Alyssa is just not attracted to Jerry at all. She doesn't know why either. Every time she reads about someone like him in erotica her pussy turns into a waterfall but in real life she Just doesn't like him at all.

I Just don't get it, whenever I read about men and their tight asses and thick man titties or whatever going against women and their squishy and adorable parts and glistening skin with their beautiful eyes, I just get So hor-. wait, I'm a lesbian aint l. Yippee!

She jumps up and spins around in excitement until she notices something black on her desk. She stops spinning and-

ITS A FUCKING BLACK WIDOW! 

She pulls her NRA sanctioned grenade out of her -

pocket and gets interrupted by a voice. 

"No please, I haven't even gotten lesbian pregnant, oh please!"

Oh gosh, all I wanted was to be an awesome lady lady killer dyke type spider and this I straggot ass human is gonna kill me. I literally Just ran Away from papa.

Allysa slows down a second, then stops.

Wait, did it say lesbian pregnant? I wasn't aware that was something someone could do.

“Shut up you lying ass bitch, we both know that spiders can’t be lesbians!"

“That's not true you ignorant ass bi-pedal straggot!”

“Am I a straggot or am I BI-pedal umm? I'm a lesbian too bitch!”

“Oh well, why are you attacking me. fellow faggot?!!!”

Why am I attacking you? You're a Black spider, you could kill me, but, with my NRA sanctioned grenade and also my Pussy Pistol™  I could kill anyone. Also , this is the only other queer I know. Oh god, what've I done?

“Oh my octo-legged queen I'm so sorry, I was being a total hypocrite!"

Wow, I never expected a home-sapistraggt to turn to good so quickly. Tis' truly a miracle. Not to mention she’s fucking hot. If I squint hard enough I could imagine her as a spider

"It's-It's okay, I never expected a human to understand."

"It's just that, as a queer, I'm lonely, so lonely Marcus!”

"My name is Natalie."

"Oh, sorry, it was a Will Poulter reference.”

Oh dear lord thank god she didn't get the reference, it’s way too early to be flirting.

“Oh well, I’m lonely too.”

Oh no, what if we wouldn't work together. I certainly want to marry her but she's already making references I don't Understand. I don't care! I am obsessed with her. Talking to her makes me feel like my heart Will explode. I'd scale the tallest mountains for her. I’d slay a billion soldiers for her. Fuck, she’s so adorable now that she's calming down.

"Hey, so- What's your name..?”

"I'm Alyssa nice to meet you.”

This is such a cute spider. I can't believe I almost Killed it.. I can see all of its eyes, glistening in the office lights just like stars in the sky, so dreamy. FOCUS! I need to find out how to get lesbian pregnant. That sounds fucking hot!

“Hey wait a minute, what’s lesbian pregnant?”

“Oh well, it's not something that happens with humans. When a spider marinates in female cum we can get pregnant."

Oh no, I was really excited to become lesbian pregnant. Oh welly Just not for me I guess. But, maybe I can get Natalie lesbian pregnant. Oh that would be a dream. having a few arachno-children with such a beautiful girl.

"Um, Just curious, could a human get a Spider lesbian pregnant?" 

"1-I'm not quite sure, it's never been tried before."

“Oh, well, maybe you could try it, or something."

I grow tenser. I practically just asked to impregnate my crush. I'm. Such a pathetic fail girl. I'm sweating. I'm so horny I'm literally squirming!

Oh my god she totally wants to get me pregnant. I think. I'm not quite sure actually. I might just be making her uncomfortable. Fuck it! What am I again? I am the lady ladykiller. I could, and maybe already have, totally get a human to fall in love with me.

"Ay baby, open your legs and maybe your pussy juices could get me lesbian pregnant.”

I can't even speak, I just fall down. It feels like there's oceans of waves crashing inside of me. God, I can't wait for Natalie to be inside me. My legs start spreading, it doesn’t even feel like I’m controlling myself. She's scuttling up my leg and I'm getting so flustered. I support Myself on my elbows. She's making her way up my thighs. I can feel exactly where she is. It tickles! I bring my hand to my mouth to stop myself from laughing, moaning, whimpering, and screaming. God I wanna whimper so bad. I hope Natalie likes whimpering. I fall slightly angled to my side from moving my hand to my mouth. She's inside of me now.

Oh my god I can’t believe I’m doing this, I'm fucking a human. She's squirming so much, it's adorable. I'm actually inside her. Holy shit. I've never done this before, I haven't even chainsawed another spider, (like scissoring, but chainsaw because spiders have so many legs) I need a strategy.

Natalie puts herself in between Alyssa's g-spot and clit. She uses 6 of her legs to squirm around her g spot and 2 to circle her clit.

 What The fuck is she doing in me? I've never masturbated before. This is so new oh my god this is amazing. It feels like a new part of me. It Just feels like pleasure. I can't stop shaking. My hand is barely even muffling my moans. I'm clenching the floor so hard it hurts. I'm not even controlling myself any more. It's like my body is begging to burst through my skin. It's like I'm made of lightning. I can’t take it anymore. It's too much but I want so much more.

Alyssa cums an entire yard, all over her cubicle wall. Nobody notices because everyone's gone to kill themselves. Natalie gets completely washed. out, she's covered in cum.

I can barely move. I didn't know humans could cum this much. my entire body of sore. I don't think I'm gonna make it. I lived a good life. I realized I was a lesbian, I ran away from papa, and then I met the girl of My dreams. I'm perfectly content, even if I don't get lesbian pregnant. At least, I got her to cum hard. There's a sharp pain in my stomach. I feel like I'm about to burst open. It hurts like fire. It feels like my entire body is on fire. I think, I'm giving birth! Oh my god I'm gonna die having been Lesbian pregnant! My life is complete! I can finally rest! I can finall-

"Oh my god that was so good I've never- Natalie? Natalie are you okay? Natalie!!! No no no no!”

Did my girlfriend drown in my cum? No she can't, I love her so much. She can’t be gone. This is all my fault. How could I let this happen? If I Just was harder to make cum or-or never had sex with her in the first place this would all be fine. This is such bullshit! I was alone for so long and just as soon as I find love she dies. Maybe I could- maybe I could clone her. No, that's stupid! It's Just hopeless. There's nothing I can do. Everything. I've ever cared about is gone. I'm Just, worthless now. It's- It's kinda nice to be worthless. No matter what I do now I can never hit a new low. 1- I guess it's okay that Natalie is gone. Spiders only live a few weeks anyways. I accept this. What's that!? Is that an egg? It's growing! It's-It's oh it stopped.

Alyssa took that egg, and when it hatched, it became something she never imagined. His name? Peter Parker.

[88088-8]

It’s sad to say but right now I’m really just feeling it over everything and I know the only thing that makes me not feel suicidal is my daughter. I don’t feel like my mom loves me like I need to be loved. I don’t feel like the man I’m supposed to marry loves me like we need to be love, and also on top of that neither of them are willing to learn. And I know years ago by and Halie will leave me too and I’ll be left alone. Like I always have been.

I just feel like I’m putting all this effort and the people who are only putting effort into themselves. And I’m just helping them take care of them and at the end of the day whenever I need help or I ask for anything my needs usually are not met.

And I don’t have anyone I can talk to about it. I don’t wanna give up, but I feel like it. I just don’t know what to do anymore. I’ve spent the last nine years building a relationship in a family with a man who doesn’t have any appreciation and respect for me and the things that I do. If I don’t make money a lot of value, and even if I do make money, I’m not a volume as I’m making more money than him and if I ever make more money than him, then it would be a total power trip and he would not like that either so there’s literally no winning.

I just want to give up. But I can’t leave Halie and Avery. What really sucks is whenever I start feeling really bad for the person who supposed to be my person acts like I’m just being dramatic. He’s never on my side he never sticks up for me. I mean if he does love me, his love isn’t enough for me.

Maybe mines not enough for him. He says that I talk to my shit but what do you means is I have a nasty town because I have anxiety I am overwhelmed or I told him this already and he doesn’t listen to me.

But whenever he talks to me like shit, he’s actually calling me names. Call me stupid or dumb ass or something today. And whenever I said, I feel like a second glasses in my own home, he told me this isn’t my home.

So yeah. And I know probably never get an apology and even if I do, it’ll happen again next week.

Basically, he was implying today that if I continue to bitch, I don’t have anywhere to live.

But I had asked him to get my nails done and get a birthday gift for Nataly. And he acted all like bothered by the fact that I asked him that and then he said that he just wish I could get my own nails done with my own money.

Which mind you a couple weeks ago I got my nails and toes done and he and I both agreed I should do it more often and it looks nice. He likes it and I like it..

But he hates when I ask him for money. And tbh I wasn’t even mad that I wasn’t going to get a gift for my nose and I was more mad. He acts bothered by anytime I ask him for something. Like I’m able to get it any other way?

So I said, never mind and I went to my bathroom and I started filing my own no polish off, and I was going to make them look presentable for this dinner I’m supposed to go to for Nataly‘s birthday. So he came in with money. I’m sorry to yelling at me telling me to go and I was just like forget it never mind I don’t wanna make you feel stressed out or you know I don’t like feeling like a burden so

And by that he took it to the point where he told me, I don’t have a house. So I gave him all of the logins to all of the new business I’m setting up and I’m just gonna let him do it because he can do it better than him as he says.

I’m just worth nothing.

[bebe-thewriter]

Heyyy y’all I am back with the “bare wit me” series and if I’m being totally honest I have no idea what direction I’m going on with😐 butttt the lovely @xxmaddienicolexx Asked me ever so politely to continue so it it my duty to comply without complaints, soooo enjoy chapter 4 or bare wit me- BeBe🧘🏾‍♀️

The rest of the day went by quickly, but the casting came slow. Yamir, and Mikasa continued to tell me I did well, as a way to comfort me.

“This shit is driving me nuts bro.” I said, with a slight tremor in my throat. I’m freaking out. I’ve been to many auditions, and a plethora of castings but this was different, this was what I wanted since i heard their first ever song in high school.

“(Y/N) calm down bae, you did amazing, we know it, you know it, he’ll even the band basically said your in! You just gotta trust it.” Mikasa said while softly messaging my back.

“She’s right, and along with that, we all peeped Connie eye fucking you soooooo.” Ymir says with a big smirk.

“Ymir stop! He was not….. was he.” I said. “Yes bitch, he was.” Now that calmed me down.

“Ughhh girl you have no idea what he dose to me. He’s so damn attractive, and not to mention fucking talented! Not only is he the producer of S.C.O.U.T.S but the drummer, andddddd the lead rapper! Ugh he is just so-“ but before I could finish I was cut off by ymir.

“Sexy, and dreamy,” “don’t forget he has the sex appeal of a god!!!!” She adds Imitating things I may have and may not have said. “Sthu y’all ain’t funny” I say giggling, they know me so well.

Before we can continue our conversation we see a group hurriedly jog past us. “THE CASTING IS OUT.” I hear someone yell excitedly.

“Oh I guess the casting is out.” I say in a nonchalant way, but then it hits me……….. “THE FUCKING CASTING IS OUT!!!” I repeat this time though with more emotion.

We hurriedly sprint to that tiny piece of paper strung up by tape and surrounded but a sea of bodies. As we walk through them I notice multiple reactions happening, sadness being the more popular one. Though envy was a recurring one as well, “who the hell are even half of these people a bunch of nobodies bro,” and, “well I’m clearly one of the best singers at this school so they just lost a valuable player!” And so on.

Finally we reach the paper and with a beating heart I read it……damn I’m at the top nvm.

(Y/N), Historia, Bobby, Natalie, Petra, Floch, Dj, Mavis, Missy, and Geneva. “We hope to see you all at rehearsals starting on Monday morning. Btdubs your excused from all classes cause like were more important byeeeee” after reading the poster on thing is for certain… Saha wrote this shit and two I’m at THE FUCKING TOP OF THE LIST.

Mikasa, Ymir, and I all start getting giddy with excitement but out of respect we remain silent. “Come on guys let us depart.” Mikasa says in a accent. “Ofc lady Mikasa, come sir Ymir we must go, it appears i must participate in the act of tinkleing” I say mimicking Mikasa. As soon as we get to the coed bathroom we celebrate. “See girl we knew you could do it you were top of that list.” Mikasa says. “Yeah she’s right, your even double lucky because now you get to hang with Mr. “damn mama you so fine” headass.” Ymir says.

“Guys stop! Connie would never say that and now that I’m IN THE COMPETITION our relationship will be professional.” I rant. “But damn I almost got distracted during my audition, he really is just sooo amazing.” I repeat for the thousands of times.

“Nah mama that’s all you.” Wait what. My head slowly turns to the low voice and my entire body stiffens. “Hey Connie.” I say nervously, “hey (Y/N)” he says smirk growing ever so wide.

I FUCKING FORGOT WE WERE IN COED BATHROOMS

last minute post sorry if it’s rushed and shit it’s because it is I’m not used to writing a story after a few weeks usually it takes years Lmaoooooo but yea hope y’all enjoyed ps my bad didn’t mean for it to be so short but it’s Ight

-BeBe out💃🏾

[depressed-teacup-inc]

The Kwamis are carrying this goddamn show

Hi, hello, how y’all doing, new episode but it was Halloween so I got the day off for myself ok?

Anyways I’m already seeing red flags in Passion and I don’t like it✨

So let’s start this by saying that in general this season feels very fan-servicey. I feel like after the complete absurdity that was season four and people being absolutely infuriated with the writing, the writers of miraculous scrambled to basically bring out as much fanfic-y tropes as possible to please the fandom (reversenlove square, weird completely unrealistic gadgets that shouldn’t even work, etc.) in general, I feel like miraculous got really derailed from what the original show could have been, and that they’re trying to do what should have been done so long ago so fast, that no everything feels… well really fucking sloppy I won’t lie.

But I digress, let me tell you why this connects to the episode while I review it

Natalie is fucking iconic, I love that bitch so much

Literally girl fought her entire life, and honestly I have no clue why she ever loved Gabriel, but at least now she’s realizing her worth and also beat the shit out of Gabriel, we’re all here for it.

(Also queen, love you, but you could’ve just stolen the butterfly miraculous and given it to ladybug to solve the problem, because this show be making her so OP that she would cure everything)

And speaking of Gabriel…

FUCKING CUNT I HATE YOU!!! FURST YOU TREAT YOUR SON LIKE SHIT, NOW YOURE COOKING PANCAKES OUT OF NOWHERE TO FEEL LIKE YOURE A GOOD FATHER (him saying they’re a family was giving the same energy of a boss saying the company is a family) AND WHEN NATALIE RIGHTFULLY CALLS YOU OUT, YOU BLACKMAIL HER WITH YOUR LIFE AND ADRIEN’S SO SHE’LL STAY BY YOUR SIDE?! BITCH!!!! TURNS OUT EVEN YOUR DEAD WIFE WAS AGAINST ALL OF THIS

Sorry had to get that out of my system, he will forever be a cunt and I’m afraid the show is trying to pretend he’s ok

Adrien actually had lots of screentime this episode, but… most of it is him being just in love with marinette or sad about Natalie (honestly his scenes with Natalie were worlds better then this love square mess)

Which… brings me to the reverse love square. listen. I know everyone is happy about the love square reversal and honestly, good for them, but this episode… kinda ruined it?

You see Adrien is now in love with Marinette because apparently she was always there for him and helped him through rough times? (I think that she more stalked him a lot, and just gave him half decent advice in the one episode where everyone else is dumbed down because LiLa, and at this point he should have had a restraining order on her, but ok!) which despite my opinions, I can accept. It makes sense that Adrien would fall in love with someone who is giving him the bare minimum because no one ever gives him the bare fucking minimum.

Meanwhile Marinette… basically fucking confirmed that she’s using chat noir the way she used Luka.

…I SWEAR TO FUCKING GOD-

Everyone around this girl are like “yeah you always do this thing where whenever shit doesn’t go well with Adrien you’ll throw yourself on another person, telling yourself you love them when in reality you love how they are constantly serving and pleasing you” and she’s like “nah it’s ok I love him”

Like. Does this bitch have no sense of self awareness? After four seasons of constantly screaming, punching, mocking, humiliating and lying to chat (which btw I don’t think has ended, but that’s a story for another day), because now she has to kinda deal with the consequences of her actions (I say kinda because the entire thing with Gabe and the miraculouses has been minimized severely, with everyone always saying it’s fine and that she’ll fix it), she starts flirting and leading him on again, because she likes how now, after all the fighting, Chat Noir is just an assistant for her, that believes he’s completely worthless without her, and will constantly obey her whims.

And doesn’t she for a second realize how awful what she’s doing is? Like I don’t know about y’all but after what she did to chat Noir, the fact she’s using him like this is so messed up and she doesn’t even want to acknowledge it.

…THIS IS SO FUCKED UPPPP!!! Like this is literally confirming that she doesn’t love Chat Noir, she’s using him, AGAIN!!! And no offense girl, I don’t care how many times the show says shes in love with Adrien, she’s obsessed with him. Right now it’s just a temporary break from him like the one she had with Luka, before she goes back to him saying she’s in love with him.

…Luka and Chat should start a club at this fucking point.

Also speaking of, I saw what the show tried to pull this episode, on one side saying “here fandom look at this chat saved the day he’s the hero and ladybug’s the sidekick there you go” but also at the same time further emphasizing how OP the ladybug miraculous is and how no matter what, the cat follows the the ladybug leads which means that the show doesn’t screw chat noir over, no no, it’s just that the ladybug is the only right miraculous for any situation possible. Thanks I hate it.

But hey at least the Kwamis called it! Honestly Tikki and Plagg god bless, Adrien listen to your Kwami and eat cheese instead. They were honestly gems this episode, and were spitting facts and SOMEONE PAY THOSE LITTLE CUNTS FOR PUTTING UP WITH THIS SHIT IN PERSON.

But yeah that’s the episode!

(Also the goat miraculous is fucking stupid, couldn’t Natalie have just created the locating arrows to track the heroes outside of their transformation too? SHE CAN CREATE ANYTHING GOD I HATE THIS)

Also Natalie is gay for Emilie goodnight

[cerezsis]

Hi, I was the anon who submitted the “the Doctor should have more on-screen love interests who aren’t 19-20something” ask. I sent it anonymously because I’m shy, but this anon just pissed me off so I’m revealing myself now.

No Anon, I wasn’t high when I sent that. I’m very well aware that River was played by an actress well above the 19-20something age range. In fact, River and the Doctor are one of my favorite pairings, and *GASP* a big reason why I want the Doctor to have older love interests!

In short

Errrr Clara was literally in her 30s and River was played by someone in her 50s, is that anon high?

Clara was in her late 20s by the time she left and Alex was in her 40s for most/all of her time on the show but close enough

3/4 of the Doctor love interests have been women from 19-late20s and they've all been pretty different but idk, I still think it's pretty fair to be wanting a change, I know I do. 

I wouldn’t be against a male love interest eventually, or a 30-50 year old companion love interest. Idk, there’s a lot of things they can do and they’ve kinda used up most of the different stories for a young woman love interest at this point I think, it’s gonna get samey if it keeps happening

[thatfanficstuff]

Summer Wedding - Stucky

Grouping - Stucky x Reader

Warnings: 18+. Minors DNI. smut including unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it), public teasing, oral sex (m receiving), spit roasting, minor knife play and other stuff I'm sure I forgot.

A/N: This is the first fic I'm posting for my summer celebration and it was actually written for boxofbonesfic's Hot Girl Summer Challenge. Not as um...descriptive as I'd intended on making it but I like it. Enjoy.

Word count: 3544

***

The wedding was beautiful, even you had to admit that. It was a relatively simple affair as these things went, though you were certain your uncle had spent several thousands on the flowers that seemed to dot every surface of the grounds of his estate. At least he’d kept your cousin from having a large church wedding this time. There was only so many times that was acceptable anyway, right?

A sigh slid from your lips and you sipped at your drink. You never should have come to this wedding. You weren’t in the mood for it. No, you should have made up an excuse about being sick and stayed home. The only reason you hadn’t was the fact you had no desire to listen to your mother bitch at you for the next six months for missing a family event. Just the thought had you rolling your eyes.

You’d actually been looking forward to the wedding until last week. That’s when you discovered your boyfriends were going on a mission and would not be back in time to accompany you. Not only did you hate going to weddings alone, but you’d already gone through the ordeal of explaining to your aunt why you need a plus two instead of a plus one. And she certainly hadn’t kept that information to herself. Half the damn day had been spent answering questions about your relationship from nosy family members.

Speaking of…Your cousin Natalie sat down in one of the empty chairs that flanked you. She smirked and sipped at her champagne. “So, where are your dates, Y/N?”

You resisted the urge to roll your eyes again. Too much more of that and you’d have a raging migraine. Instead, you kept your gaze on the dance floor and took another sip of your drink. “They had to work.”

“I just find it interesting that you all but beg mother for an extra seat and here they both are. Empty.” She eyed you, waiting for a reaction you had no intention of giving her. “I mean, why lie? It’s kind of pathetic.”

You finally turned your head to her. “Shouldn’t you be doing something wedding-ish? You are the maid of honor, aren’t you? Oh, that’s right, you aren’t in the wedding party, are you?” You sucked a breath through your teeth in mock sympathy. “Sorry.”

There was certain to be a reason why Natalie wasn’t part of her only sisters third wedding, but you didn’t care beyond the fact it was sure to be a sore spot. Frankly, Natalie had always been a bitch, even when you were children. Though, unlucky in the marriage department, her sister Sally had always been your preferred cousin. Maybe Sally had finally gotten tired of dealing with her sister’s shit.

Natalie narrowed her eyes and leaned toward you. “I don’t believe you could get one man to put up with you, let alone two. No one does. We actually had a pool going over whether either of them would show up. And if they did, whether they’d leave with you since you’d probably paid them to be here. I mean, most people just make up one boyfriend. Two really takes the cake. You never could stand not being the center of attention.”

The irony wasn’t lost you that most of your family had no idea you worked with the Avengers. Nor had you mentioned the names of those two boyfriends of yours. Real attention seeker you were. You chanced a glance at your phone to check the time. You had at least another hour before you could leave without a lecture from your mother. You also had zero messages from your boys. Hopefully, that meant they were taking care of business and would be home soon.

“Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god,” your cousin started whisper yelling from beside you as she froze in her chair. Her eyes were wide and slightly crazed.

Your brow furrowed. “What the hell is wrong with you?” Even as you waited for an answer, your trained ear picked up murmurs beginning amongst the other guests.

When you went to look over your shoulder, Natalie gripped your hand. “Don’t turn around,” she said through clenched teeth. When you went to do it anyway, she snapped again. “Don’t. They’ll see you staring.”

“Who?” Your tone was clipped as irritation crawled through you.

“Steve Rogers and James Barnes just walked in,” she hissed, her gaze locked on them. So apparently she was allowed to stare but you weren’t. By this point, everyone else would be staring as well. The boys were used to it.

You snatched your hand away from your cousin and spun in your seat. As soon as you saw them, a smile covered your face. They had been so certain they wouldn’t be back in time. You knew they’d pushed themselves to be here for you. You ran your gaze over them, taking in the rare sight of them in suits. Even though you’d helped them pick them out, you still licked your lips at the sight.

Steve wore a beautiful bright blue suit that you knew brought out his eyes even though they were currently hidden behind sunglasses. Buck’s suit looked light blue but it was actually a thin blue pin stripe. Both of them looked incredible as always, but you always got a little thrill seeing them dressed up. Of course, that feeling was mutual.

They hadn’t seen you yet, but they were scanning the crowd as they moved across the vast grounds of your uncle’s estate. When your uncle moved to greet them, you stood as well.

Natalie grabbed at your arm. “What are you doing? You’re going to embarrass me.”

Yeah, she didn’t need any help with that. You shook her off and started toward your men. Both of them immediately locked onto your presence and wide smiles greeted you. Your uncle got to them before you could. Steve shifted his attention to speak with him, but Buck’s attention was 100% on you. His gaze trailed over you from head to toe and his eyes darkened.

“We’re extremely honored that you’re here. How did you hear about the wedding?” you heard your uncle ask. He was one of the politer members of your family.

“They’re with me, Uncle Frank,” you said as soon as you were close enough to be heard without raising your voice. “Sorry they’re late. They were working.”

Frank turned to you, his mouth slightly agape and his brows lifted. “These are the dates Margie wouldn’t stop going on about?” Margie was his wife and the aunt you had to beg for the extra seat.

You hummed in agreement.

“Well, I certainly hope so or this is going to turn awkward in a moment,” Bucky said with a lopsided grin. He opened his arms in invitation and you stepped into them. “Missed you, doll.”

You nuzzled against his chest briefly, careful not to transfer your makeup to his shirt. “I missed you, too. So much. I’m glad you’re home.”

There was a tug on your arm and you were pulled into Steve’s embrace. He pressed a kiss to your temple. “Hey, baby.”

“Hey, soldier.” You turned to look at your uncle who was still staring in stunned silence. “Steve, Bucky, this is my Uncle Frank. Father of the bride.”

Both of your boys shook his hand and thanked him for allowing them to come. He hurried back to his table, undoubtedly to announce this strange turn of events. You fell into step with your boyfriends, taking their hands in yours while you walked in the middle. You led them over to your table to find Natalie still in Bucky’s seat.

“Natalie,” you said to get her attention. When she continued to gape at the two men you said her name again.

She smiled at you as if you were her favorite person in the world certain there was an introduction in her future. “Yes, cousin?”

“You’re in his seat.”

She blinked at you for a second before her face twisted in anger. She scrambled from the chair and stormed back to her table with a toss of her head. Steve and Buck chuckled as they took their seats on either side of you. They slid their chairs as close to you as they could get. “Are you two hungry? We already had dinner but I could find you something.”

Bucky squeezed your thigh. “We ate. Don’t worry about us, sweetheart.”

“I’m glad you two made it,” your mother’s voice caught your attention and you turned to find her standing next to Steve. He stood to greet her and you leaned against Bucky, knowing he wouldn’t care to do the same. “If I had to listen to one more person say she made you up I was going to scream,” she admitted as she hugged Steve. That earned another low chuckle from Bucky.

“Mrs. Y/L/N, it’s good to see you again,” Steve said, managing to sound sincere. Not that he disliked your mother, but they’d just returned from a mission. All they wanted to do was stay home for a couple of days and destress. But they’d come here for you and they would be on their best behavior.

“We won’t be staying long, mom. They just got home,” you informed her and braced yourself for an argument.

Instead, she nodded. “Of course, sweetheart. Just make sure to introduce them to Sally before you leave.”

You groaned. “Can’t I just do it at her next wedding?”

“Y/N!” she snapped but you caught the twitch at the corner of her lips.

Bucky snorted a laugh beside you while Steve shot you a chastising look. You smiled. “I will, momma.”

She left and Bucky turned to speak in your ear as Steve sat back down. “We don’t have to leave, baby girl.” The nickname shot a thrill up your spine. “I love weddings. The food. The dancing. The clothes. Like this little number you have on. I really love this dress, doll.” You wore a white sundress with tiny blue flowers on it to match their suits that fell a few inches above your knees. It was the first time either of them had seen it.

Steve’s arm settled across the back of your chair and his fingers played with your hair. “Yeah, that dress is something special. It might be a bit too short, though,” he said without glancing at you. Instead, he seemed to be keeping an eye on the crowd around you.

“It’s not too short.” You loved the dress and thought it was perfect.

“Yeah, Stevie. If anything, it’s not short enough.” Bucky’s fingers dragged your dress up your thigh, bunching it up in his hand as he went.

“What are you doing, Barnes?” you hissed.

“I told you I missed you, doll. I want to show you how much.”

You placed a hand on his, stopping his movement. “You can’t be serious.”

“Of course, we are. We talked about it all the way home,” Steve answered. He lowered his mouth to speak in your ear. “Talked about how we wanted to please you in front of everyone. With everyone watching because you know their eyes are glued to our table trying to figure out how we managed to land a beautiful gal like you.”

You snorted a laugh that cut off in a gasp as Bucky pulled your dress further up your thigh. “I don’t think that’s what they’re thinking, Steve.”

Bucky kissed the patch of skin behind your ear. “How come he gets Steve and I got Barnes?”

“He’s not the one actively trying to feel me up at my cousin’s wedding.” Your eyes slipped closed as his fingers brushed your inner thigh. Sweat beaded your skin and you wondered if you could blame it on the heat even though it was ten degrees cooler than it had been earlier.

“But it was all his idea,” Buck whispered.

Your eyes flew open to shoot a glare at the blond’s head. “Steven Grant Rogers, What would your mother say?”

Buck laughed, drawing the attention of some of the few people that weren’t already staring. “She’d probably say, ‘good going, Stevie’. She would have loved you.”

“Would—” All ability to finish your sentence or to have a rational thought fled from you when he pushed your panties aside and ran his fingers through your folds. Fuck.

“She’s already soaking wet for us, Steve. Such a good girl,” Bucky cooed.

Steve’s hand fisted on the back of your chair as he glanced around again. “I was wrong. I don’t have the patience for this. I need to be buried in her.” He slid his sunglasses off and put them in the inside pocket of his jacket. He turned to face you, blue eyes burning into you. “You have exactly two minutes to find us someplace private or we’re going to finger fuck you right here until you scream. Your choice, princess.”

In less than a minute, you’d sent a text on your phone and jumped to your feet. Taking their hands in yours, you dragged them toward the house. You pulled them through the large home until you reached a familiar door on the main level. Opening it, you shoved the super soldiers inside. You locked the door behind you and turned to find them already loosening their ties.

“We don’t have time for that,” you argued with a wave of your hands. “I told Uncle Frank we were borrowing his office for an important phone call. We have twenty minutes tops.”

Bucky groaned. “I wanted to take my time with you. I missed you,” he nearly whined.

The corner of your mouth kicked up. “We can take all the time you want later, baby. Right now, just fuck me.” That had him groaning again, an entirely different sound this time.

Steve, however, wasn’t wasting any time. He grabbed a cushion from the couch and tossed it on the floor. “All fours, princess.” He was already undoing his belt by the time you dropped to your knees. He moved behind you and pushed your dress up to give himself a clear view of your ass. He ran his hand over it before giving you a light swat. The mild sting was still enough to have you shifting.

“These have got to go,” he said tugging on the side of your panties. “Buck?”

You glanced up to see Bucky grin as he pulled out a knife and handed it to Steve. He traced your spine with the back of the blade causing you to hiss and arch your back. The sensation only doubled when he moved from cloth to bare skin. The cold steel on your flesh sent tremors through you but you weren’t scared. Far from it. “I think she likes that, Stevie,” Bucky said, a teasing lilt in his voice. “We’ll have to remember that.”

Steve merely hummed before slicing through both sides of your panties and pulling them off as he handed the knife back to his friend. His hand immediately cupped you and his fingers dipped into your soaking wet folds. “Christ, Y/N. I hope you’re ready for me, baby.”

The head of his cock nudged your entrance as if asking for permission but that only lasted a moment. A second later, Steve surged forward filling you with his length. You moaned at the familiar sensation and clawed at the carpet. He paused, giving you time to adjust then he was thrusting into you in long, slow strokes. “Don’t tease,” you ordered.

Steve laughed and increased his speed. When you groaned, Bucky was there rubbing the tip of his cock across your lips. You opened your mouth and sucked at him greedily, needing to taste him while Steve railed you from behind. Only when you had both of them inside of you did you feel complete. Whole. Whatever the fuck was wrong with you, you hoped there was no cure. You would gladly die like this.

The feeling of both of them moving in and out had a perfectly sinful, wanton moan coming from you. The vibration ran along the length of Bucky’s cock and he grunted. His fingers tightened their hold in your hair and his speed increased. Steve mirrored his pace and it didn’t take long for the office to fill with lurid grunts and the sweaty, sweet smell of sex.

Soon, you were so lost in sensation you became little more than a vessel for them to use as you climbed to your peak. Their rhythm stuttered and you knew they were close. You clenched your walls around Steve and were rewarded with a hiss and his grip on your hips tightening. At the same time, you sucked harder on Bucky and ran your tongue along the underside of his cock. “Fuck,” he bit out. “I’m close. Cum, baby girl. Come on.”

Steve’s fingers found your clit. Two seconds later you were screaming around the cock in your mouth as your cunt clutched greedily at the one in your pussy. Fuck. Bucky came next, his load shooting into your mouth and down your throat. As you swallowed his offering, Steve filled you with his cum. You felt it leak around him and drip to the floor.

They pulled out of you at the same time and you collapsed to your side. “Holy shit,” you said between pants causing your boys to laugh.

“Holy shit’s right. Damn,” Bucky agreed. Your eyes followed his movements as he tucked himself back into his pants and put himself to rights. Before you could turn to Steve, you felt fabric between your legs cleaning you up.

A glance showed him wiping away his cum with the remnants of your panties. He gave you a wicked grin. “Can’t have you leaking all over your cousin’s wedding, now can we?”

Your face heated as you thought about all the times they’d made you walk around with their cum leaking out of you. Apparently, that wasn’t appropriate for a wedding but was fine everywhere else. Steve stood and pulled his pants up before doing up his belt. He held out a hand to you. “Let’s get you fixed up, sweetheart.”

They’d barely done anything and looked like they had when you walked into the room. You, on the other hand, probably looked like you’d gone a couple of rounds with a rabid raccoon. Stupid men. Steve made sure your dress was laying correctly so everything was covered while Bucky did the same thing behind you. They both fiddled with your hair for a moment before declaring you gorgeous.

You narrowed your gaze at them, not buying it for a moment. The three of you quickly put the office to rights. There was nothing you could do about the smell of sex in the air but hopefully it would dissipate before your uncle needed to use it.

“Seriously, baby girl. You look fantastic,” Buck insisted when he noticed you fidgeting.

“Yeah, but you guys like it when I look freshly fucked,” you said as you opened the door. There was a mirror in the hallway you used to check your appearance. You actually didn’t look that bad, but you definitely looked a little wild. You shrugged. Honestly, you didn’t care. “All right, we’re saying hello to the bride, then we’re leaving.”

“No argument here.” Steve took your hand in his and Buck did the same thing on the other side.

When the three of you made it outside, you headed straight for the head table. “Sally, this is Steve and Bucky. Boys, this is my cousin Sally and her new husband Ben.”

“Lovely to meet you,” Steve greeted with a smile. Sally launched herself at him and wrapped him in a hug.

“I can’t believe you came to my wedding,” she squealed before letting go of him to hug Bucky. His eyes begged you to help him but you just smiled. Sally was a bit flighty but she was good people.

She hugged you last. “You should have told me, Y/N. I would have sat you closer to the front.”

“It’s okay, Sally. We have to go. Congratulations,” you said then let her go. When you did, you found that most of the family had come to get introductions or say their farewells. Nicole tried to go in for a hug, but Steve subtly made sure it was nothing more than a handshake. The fact you didn’t introduce her was enough to tell them she wasn’t the kind of person they wanted to know.

When she tried to hug Bucky, you intercepted and hugged her instead. “It was good seeing you, Nicole.”

“You have some explaining to do,” she said in a low voice as she hugged you tighter than necessary. When she released you, she continued to stand by you.

You watched Bucky and Steve say goodbye to your mother and uncle before they turned to you. You held up a finger to tell them you’d be right with them and leaned sideways to get closer to your cousin. “So, just out of curiosity, did anyone in the pool have them fucking me during the reception?”