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har-rison-s · 3 years ago

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neverland

SPIDER-MAN: NO WAY HOME SPOILERS AFTER THIS IMMEDIATELY!!! DON'T READ IF YOU HAVEN'T SEEN IT!!!!

request: I AM SO LATE but i got to watch nwh today! but god, i have a prompt where in an alternate universe and future, andrew’s peter saves gwen and they have a daughter who’s the spitting image of her mother but has her dad’s eyes, which is like something everyone says to her, maybe in your fic cool uncle tobey’s spidey tells her that. when ned does the portal thingy, she emerges from it and is like, “woah! dad! mom prepared your favourite dinner you need to get home asap!” or whatever, and andrew’s peter is just like “????”, then they learn about each other and he sort of gets some peace of mind when he learns that in some distant future alternate universe he was able to save gwen and they’re happy and have a few beautiful children together

a/n: listen i'm crumbling. i'm still crying after nwh, still in my post-nwh depression cave. and andrew's peter is the closest one to my heart, 11 year old me would not believe everything that happened in nwh but she'd be so happy! my god. and i still want to write more for andrew's peter, and i love love love this request so much, it's something to explore new territory in him yk and it's exciting! thanks so much to the lovely anon (who is now my bestie) for this prompt! it's perfect. so happy reading, my babies:) merry christmas.

my paypal (would be much appreciated since i’m saving up for uni next year :))

mcu masterlist

warnings: nwh spoilers? and you might cry. because i did. so grab some tissues. also not proof-read, but probs will be sometime later. haha

word count: a lot of them. this is a longer one.

a/n: peter my baby im in tears again :( i cry just seeing him. no i don't need help i just need peter parker to be real.

This image of the young girl is haunting.

That's the best word to describe it. Haunting. It's like seeing a ghost for Peter, quite literally. Everything in her face looks just like her. Just like Gwen. Only the eyes are different, they look familiar to him but he can't place it. Everything else is, well, the spitting image of the Gwen Stacy Peter still thinks about to this day.

"Woah! What is this?! Dad, what are you doing here? Mom's got meatloaf, hot and fresh, let's go home," she whips out a flurry of words as she takes in her surroundings with wide eyes. Her hair rests around her shoulders just like Gwen's would, shining with glitter, it seems. Peter's breath gets caught in his throat.

“You--what?” He can hardly find words to say, and yet his eyes stay glued on the girl. She looks at the two teenagers beside Peter, and clearly has no idea who they are.

“Who are these people?” She asks, even though she wanted to save that question for when she and her dad are safely home. But something's telling her that everything's not quite how it should be here...

“We're friends,” Ned answers, “we're Peter Parker's friends.” MJ nods her head.

Y/N looks to Peter. “I didn't know you hung out with people my age, dad,” she says, furrowing her eyebrows, “and why are you wearing your costume?” She steps closer to him, but Peter takes a step back, his eyes still glued to her, as well as tearing up at the sight of her. “Let's just go home.” Desperation glints in her eyes and voice, and she takes a closer look at her dad's face. Why is he acting so strange? Why isn't he saying anything?

“Uh, Ned,” MJ pokes his arm, “can we get her back to... wherever she came from? Something's wrong.” She grows worried for the girl who came through the sparkling ring last. She looks to be about her and Ned's age, too.

Ned shakes his head. “I don't know how to, MJ,” he whispers to her, “until we... fix all of this, we just need to deal with it.” He suggests. MJ gives him a troubling look, but guesses that nothing else really is an option right now. She nods.

The Peter who came through last comes closer to the strangers, and the variant of himself, concerned about the situation here. He looks to the Peter who got here first. His eyes look like they're in another world, or stuck in memories. Peter knows that look well.

“Why are you calling me--” Peter pulls into himself, hugging his arms around his form. He looks to be having some sort of panic attack, “can you just... tell me your name?” He asks the girl. She nods quietly.

“My name is Y/N Stacy-Parker.” She says. Everyone in the room exchanges glances, except the Peter who's been called dad a number of times already. He processes her words by himself, seeming to fold into himself.

“How old are you?” Peter asks, wanting to add more numbers and parts to his equation.

“I'm sixteen,” she answers, “dad, you know all of these things. Why are you acting this way?”

Peter finally looks up into her eyes again. “Is your mom... G-Gwen Stacy?” He makes sure in his final efforts to understand what's happening here. Even if it hurts his heart to say her name out loud.

“Yes!” Y/N pushes out quite frustratedly. He knows all of this, and yet he keeps asking questions. Peter looks to the other Peter. If he's also Peter Parker in a different reality or universe or timeline--whatever, then maybe this girl is from another universe as well, and Peter just had an identity crisis for these few minutes for nothing.

“You must be the daughter of another Peter Parker,” the oldest Peter assumes, trying to help those two figure out what's going on in the way that he can, “just one that looks exactly like you.” He shrugs. Younger Peter looks at Y/N again, then at older Peter.

“Yeah, that makes sense.” He finally says. Y/N looks at him, then at the other man.

“Hi, I'm Peter Parker,” he tells her and extends his hand for her to shake, but she just gives it a suspicious glance, “from another universe.” He smiles at her. Her eyebrow rises in question. She looks back at her dad's supposed multiversal twin. He gives her an awkward smile.

“You're not my dad?” She makes sure, still 98% convinced that he is her dad. But the man shakes his head. She sighs quietly. “Okay, so can I go home now? I wanna see my dad.” Her lip trembles and her eyes fill with tears. She doesn't mean to cry, but she's scared, and after all just hopes that this is some kind of bad dream. It breaks Peter's heart.

Ned shrugs. “I don't know how to get you there right now,” he tells her, “but we can get you home with someone else's help.” He suggests. Y/N shakes her head, holds it in her hands for a mind-blowing and time-bending second, all the while contemplating her situation and its absurdity, and the question whether she should trust these people or not. But eventually she nods in agreement.

The two kids that look her age actually know yet another Peter Parker that exists in this universe, and they need to find him as soon as possible to help fix some big mess that the boy called Ned deemed the “multiverse”. Y/N doesn't feel safe with these people at all, especially after learning that the replicant of her dad is actually not her dad. And yet, she finds comfort in just looking at him. In his mere presence.

On the group's way to the location MJ mentioned, Peter decides to stick by Y/N. He feels this weird overprotectiveness of her, this urge to make her feel safe and keep her safe from any harm. He can't quite explain it, but he can also tell that the girl feels very uncomfortable and unsafe right now. So he walks by her, and tries to find out more about the universe she came from. It'll probably bring her some form of comfort or ease, at least, for the time being.

“Hey, uh,” he sparks up a conversation, “you feeling alright?” Peter watches her as he waits for an answer. She gives him a brief look, and then nods. Though in a hesitant manner. “We'll get you home soon, don't worry.” He assures her. Even though he doesn't know if that's completely true. “Uh, why don't you tell me about it? Home?” He offers.

Y/N contemplates it, looking into the face of her father under which there is a partial stranger. But she nods, dropping her squinty-eyed look. “Well, it's not much. Just a house in Queens, in the quiet neighbourhood.” She begins. “I live with my parents, who you obviously know,” she looks at him momentarily again, and Peter nods with a chuckle, “and my two siblings.” Peter's breath cuts short. “Mary's three years younger than me and Ben was just born.” She shrugs. “Well, not just born, he's a year old already, but it feels like he was born just a couple days ago, to be honest.” Her lips hold a light smile on them, the first one Peter's seen since she arrived.

God, Peter's always wanted siblings. He can't believe that a version of him got to have kids! And give them siblings! Live out his dream. “What's your mom like?” He quietly asks.

“She's cool,” Y/N nods with a grin on her face, “coolest mom ever. You know, dad wanted us to live in an apartment complex because of that whole Spider-Man thing--don't ask me about it--but mom couldn't. She was against it.” She explains. “It was when I was little, but I remember it. Sometimes mom cried when explaining to you--oh, sorry, to my dad--why.”

“Can you tell me?” Peter asks in an even quieter voice.

“Mom's afraid of heights,” she casually says, “something happened to her after she and dad finished high school--something she doesn't want to tell me. Something that dad knows.” Y/N sighs. “He wanted to help make her feel safer about heights, but she just wouldn't have it. That's my mom.” Y/N chuckles. “Stubborn. I guess I get it from her. That's what dad always says.”

Peter nods along, listening to every word she says, but his mind is still stuck on that one part. Mom's afraid of heights. Something happened to her that dad knows. So it's happened in that universe, too. Only Gwen survived. Only Peter managed to save her from that terrible, lethal fall.

What could he have done differently?

Peter runs his hands over his face, trying to regain himself, trying to level back down to reality. He saved Gwen. In another universe, but he saved Gwen. He actually saved her. Peter feels his chest caving in on him, and he thinks this is what it's like to have asthma, but he doesn't know that he's having a minor panic attack. Or is it just tears and sobs of relief? Because he knows that in an alternate universe, he saved the love of his life, his path, his Gwen. And that he's able to live a life out with her in that universe. One that they both deserved.

He wipes his tears with the sleeves of his suit and tries to keep his sobs as quiet as possible. He doesn't want her, or any of them, to see him this way. It's okay to cry, but no one's ever told him that enough times for him to believe that. “Wh-what's your dad like?” Peter asks then, trying to distract himself from the impending relief-attack. Y/N gives him a momentary look, and just hopes that the man is alright. He seems to be crying, although he hides it pretty well.

“He's... well, he's the best dad ever,” she tells him. Peter smiles through his tears, “calls me Tinkerbell--Tink for short--all the time because...” she sighs, “this is a bit embarrassing, but Peter Pan is my favourite movie and book of all time. And because dad can basically fly, I have the role of Tinkerbell.” She chuckles to herself. Peter can't keep his tears inside anymore. “Cause he always says I can fly, too. Just not in the way he can.” Y/N makes a small smile. “I love my dad.”

Those few words just completely break Peter. It feels like his feet will give in and he'll fall to the ground any second. Peter Pan. Of course. He doesn't even have to ask to know that Gwen is Wendy, and Y/N's siblings are the Lost Boys--or children? Peter Pan was his nickname throughout kindergarten and primary school, and he read the book as well.

It holds as much meaning to him as it does to Y/N.

And that speaks volumes. Peter can't even manage to try and keep his tears and sobs inside, and so he walks with an aching chest and heart, and a hollow throat besides this alternate universe daughter of his. Keeping it all inside, he knows it's the best thing to do right now.

She can't know what happened in his world. It will scare her more than she is already scared now. And he doesn't wish that on her. She's a young girl, so undeserving of any harm, of any pain, any kind of disturbance in her very pleasant life. And she's already a lot like her mom, not only in the sense of her appearance, because yowza! She's the spitting image of Gwen when she was in high school.

When the group does find this universe's Peter Parker, Y/N eventually gets to hear about the tragedy in the life of Peter who is her dad's doppelganger. And she realises that he was crying while they talked on the street. And now she knows why. And she feels for him, that's the best part. She understands why the sight of her made him so emotional.

During the fight against the astounding number of villains on the construction site for the renewal of the Statue of Liberty, all three Peters, as well as MJ and Ned, do their best at keeping Y/N safe. Making a clear, safe path for her wherever she goes. It's an unspoken promise Peter makes to that alternative version of himself and Gwen. To keep Y/N safe.

When the nemesis are all cured and fixed, and everyone turns out to be in one piece, and Dr Strange--some weird man in a floating cloak who can also do magic (??)--returns from wherever he was, it's time for the 'other' Peters and the people belonging to their timelines to go home. That includes Y/N.

But she's not leaving without saying goodbye. She treks all the way down to where the three Spider-Men stand together, no matter how dangerous and careless it might be, and finally reaches her dad's multiversal twin. He's relieved to see her all okay, and he expresses that with a hug. He asks for her consent first, because it might be weird and uncomfortable for the girl. But she says yes, and the hug from him is nothing short of the hugs she gets every day from her real dad.

“Thank you,” she tells him, “and I hope everything works out for you.” She gives him a smile. Peter nods, hoping the same thing for himself. “I wasn't really a part of the fight, but this was one of the most fun nights of my life.” She looks at the other Peters, too. They all have a laugh together, and respond with only kind words to her.

“Time to go home now,” Dr Strange calls from above her, and Y/N gives him a nod. She gives one last smile to her dad's twin, and then steps towards the sparkling ring the wizard makes just a few feet away. As it gets bigger, the silhouettes of her family become more and more apparent in it. They have confused faces, but they turn to relief once they see Y/N.

Peter watches an older version of himself, her father, help her climb inside the circle, where they embrace in a tight hug. Much like the one he shared with her just seconds ago. “Tink, we were so worried,” her father exclaims, and then lays a kiss atop her head. Peter's heart lurches in his chest. As Y/N starts explaining everything to her family, they turn to look at these strangers, who are dressed in quite familiar suits. One face stands out to them all, and it weirds them out as well.

Peter sees Gwen.

He sees his Gwen Stacy up there, a toddler on her hip and an apron around her waist, as well as a tired smile on that beautiful face. She gives him and the other Peters a small wave before turning her back to them again, and a curious young girl takes her place in gaping at the strangers. Peter would never believe he'd have the chance to see her live in all dimensions and with all his senses again. And he appreciates this moment, this day of miracles.

The Stacy-Parker family from another universe, possibly one further in time, stands before the three Spider-Men, and they wave their goodbyes. Now that Y/N's dad has all the explanations he needs for where his daughter was, he looks at the three men--his equals--with a smile on his face. And before Strange completely closes the sparkling ring to another universe, he mouths a 'thank you' to all three of them, but especially that seemingly younger version of himself. For keeping his Y/N safe.

Peter gives him a nod, and realises he's finally made a promise that he could keep. Keeping Y/N safe. Even if she wasn't his daughter. That means next to nothing to him that she's not his kid, because her being the daughter of another version of himself practically means that she is, to some degree, his kid. And he treated her with the utmost caution and care that he could.

As he himself fades away, fades back to his world, Peter already misses the other Peters. They really did feel like brothers to him. But he also feels relief. Relief in knowing that he could save Gwen from that horrid fall in another universe. Relief in knowing that he can keep his promises. It means an unexplainable size or form of a thing that in another universe, another Peter Parker, who looks like him, gets to live out his life in the way he wished to.

He gets to take that path.

permanent tag-list: @hallecarey1 @gabiatthedisco @v0idbella @ur-gunna-h8-ths@betweenloveandfire @but-legendsneverdie @rottenstyx @deardeacy @mavieesttriste16 @intrrverted @the-freak-cassie-131 @beverlyparkerr @gasbomb69

a/n: no one touch me rn i'm crying

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more-stuff-of-pi · 3 years ago

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Fair Trade

a/n: just in time to make it for the fic trade @heatwave2021 which is my first ever event/collab so i am v nervous! written for @blushinggray :) hope this lives up to your expectations uwu. this prompt was the one i was most immediately drawn to and who else to write in other than our resident lovable asshole

notes: check out all the other fics over on @heatwave2021! check out the jjk inumaki fic that @ara-mitsue wrote for me and check out the midoriya fic @blushinggray wrote! find my masterlist here

pairing: bakugou katsuki x gn!reader | genre: fluff | warnings: none :) | word count: 998

“You have got to be kidding me.”

The dingy little laundromat that you frequented rarely had more than one machine open at a time. Not because it was busy, no, but rather due to the fact that over half of the washers and dryers were ‘out of order’ and had been that way since long before you began your desperate patronage. As such, an open machine was a coveted thing among the few regulars who either visited out of convenience rather than quality like you or to get rid of sketchy stains from less than legal activities.

At this point you honestly wouldn’t be surprised if the laundromat was a front for some grander scheming operation. Frankly, you didn’t care. As long as it stayed convenient and relatively cheap, you certainly weren't going to say anything.

You had just barely tossed all of your things into a dryer that you had almost quite literally wrestled for, retreating to the vending machines for a well-earned snack and returning only to find that in that minuscule time frame, some shithead had taken your things out and shoveled theirs in. With an elbow supporting his weight as he leaned onto the machine and one hand drumming away at his leg, he seemed impatient and heavily annoyed at the situation. He was dressed in a way that begged to be inconspicuous and while it succeeded in covering key features, it failed to slide under the radar. You wish you could see his face so you could glare at him with direct eye contact as opposed to trying to burn holes through his sweatshirt.

“Hey, asshat! Wait your turn like everyone else here.”

The man whipped around an irritated “Huh?” sneering. You were disappointed to see the dark sunglasses adding yet another obstacle to the direct eye contact death glare goal you had set.

Unperturbed, you crossed your arms. “What, you don’t think you’re special, do you? Can’t believe you would just take someone’s stuff out of the machine they paid for, by the way, with their own hard earned money.” You move to open the washer when a big hand wraps around your wrist, lightly yanking you to a stop.

“What do you think you’re doing?”

You stare up at the stranger, eyebrows skyrocketing in disbelief. “You’re kidding, right?”

“No.”

A short, startled laugh escapes you as you shake off the stranger’s hand. “You took my laundry out of the machine I paid for and you’re mad that I’m setting it right?”

“I’m in a hurry, okay? Just let me have the damn machine.”

“With my money? Absolutely not. I’ve been waiting for the last forty-five minutes, you can at least have the decency to do the same.”

He huffs, fingers going to pinch at the bridge of his nose, aggressively pushing up the sunglasses he was wearing.

And suddenly you know why something about him seemed so familiar as unique vermilion eyes blink back at you. “Aren’t you that kid they chained up at the UA sports festival a few years ago? Bakugou something.”

“Katsuki. If I say yes will you let me wash my damn clothes?”

You cross your arms. “No, but it’ll explain why you’re so talented at being a dick.”

“Tch. How’d you even know it was me?”

“Besides your assholeish nature and your bright ass eyes?” Bakugou rolls said eyes as you carry on. “Your ‘don’t-notice-me’ outfit was a little obvious. Didn’t they ever teach you good ‘when-in-public’ disguises in that hero school of yours?” You wag a finger up and down at his miserable outfit, hoping that even he’s able to notice how cringey it is.

It seems like he understands when he grimaces as he follows your finger. “Point taken. Listen, that Midnight hag lectured on it once. It was supposed to be a three part lecture but they shut it down when they saw what she was showing us.”

Unfortunately, that startles a laugh out of you at the image of the X-rated hero scandalizing a group of teenage hopefuls. Bakugou smirks a little at that, giving the impression that he’s won something.

“You really should work on that outfit, you know. People will probably recognize you. I would say fans, but I’m assuming you don’t have any.”

“Huh?! I’m a hero, y’know, ‘course I have fans.”

You quirk your brow, the corner of your lips doing the same. “With that attitude?”

He frowns at you. “It’s not like I bite.”

“Really? That’s a shame,” you say automatically, face flushing at the realization of the horribly flirtatious subtext underlying.

Bakugou’s eyes widen, surprised at the turn this has taken but the wicked smile that quickly graces his features says it’s not unpleasant. “If you ask nicely I’m sure we can work you-- sorry, something out.”

Caught in a trap of your own making and hotter than hot, you push past the infuriatingly handsome smile to once again open the door of the washer. Again, Bakugou stops you, slamming his hand a little too hard against the door.

“Look,” he sighs, “if you let me take you out to coffee, will you let me wash my fuc--, my clothes? I’ve really gotta get back to the agency soon and I just need to clean my costume.”

“The agency doesn’t have their own laundromat? Or like a dry cleaning service?”

Bakugou glances away, mumbling something you don’t quite catch.

“What?”

“They do, just not for… interns.” When you laugh this time, Bakugou isn’t so quick to smirk. “But I’m still a hero, okay? I just have to work through the residency bullshit first.”

“Mhmm,” you smirk, biting back another laugh. “Dinner.”

He raises his brow. “What?”

“Agree to take me out to a nice dinner and then you can wash your clothes.”

Bakugou grins, sharp and intense accompanying the cutest, smallest blush that makes his eyes seem just a bit brighter. “Dinner, then. A nice one. And then maybe you can help me out with dessert.”

taglist: @samwrights, @mayaoliviee, @luluwiie

#heatwave2021 #this obv was not beta read #lord knows it's not great but i'm a little rusty but well meaning lmao #i hope y'all like it!!!#i feel like idk how to write bkg ajhidhaih but i love him sm #bakugou katsuki #bakugou katsuki x reader #bnha #bnha x reader #boku no hero academia #my hero academia #fair trade #gn!reader #bnha x gn!reader

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youcouldmakealife · 3 years ago

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SOTW: Luke/Andreas; living the dream

For the prompt: anything with Andreas

(This is the first of me ensuring the continuation of the bracket challenge by doing double-duty with the SOTWs. Fun fact: this is not the only bracket prompt for more Andreas. The people demand Andreas!!!)

If you told Andreas when he was a teenager that one day he’d be a millionaire working in hockey with a hot former NHL player boyfriend his tiny awkward pre-growth spurt New York Rangers loving ass would explode with joy. Literally explode. Andreas can picture it: hands clapping together, then poof. Gone in a cloud of glee. Glitter themed to match the Rangers’ red white and blue, even if he knew he’d deigned to date a Devil, which would take some shine off it. He’s reminding himself of this as he does what his teen self vowed he would never, ever do. Literally vowed. And has kept that vow for over twenty years. Until now. At least nobody’s making him shoot a gun, Andreas thinks glumly. “Not deer season,” Luke said, when Andreas said that, like that was the deciding factor and not Andreas’ firmly stated disgust for firearms. Luke has a gun license, but the only thing he’s using it for is going hunting with his family when he’s up in Cold Lake, and the rifle stays there, firmly locked away in a gun safe in the Morrises’ basement when it’s not in use. That’s the agreement. Andreas hasn’t even seen Luke use it: hunting’s a Morris only activity. He stays back with the kids and in-laws while Mr. Morris and the four kids troop out to sit around silently all day and return empty-handed, typically grumbling at Ben. Andreas suspects the frequency of Ben ‘accidentally’ scaring off wildlife indicates intent. Ben’s wife refuses to confirm or deny, which is confirmation enough in itself. Andreas had been excited for this vacation. The cottage they rented was more of a millionaire’s idea of a cottage than an actual one. A ‘cottage’, complete with pool, hot tub, top of the line everything, from the TV taking over half the basement, to the motor boat Luke’s been eyeing with yearning, to the fishing poles previously in the shed — the ‘shed’ also really didn’t deserve the name — and now in the motor boat. Because they are going fishing. It’s dawn, it’s already getting hot, the dew on the grass evaporating, and Luke, too awake for Andreas’ liking, is taking him fishing. He’s sorry, teenage Andreas. He’s really hot, though. And you love him. That’s not an insignificant factor. “You know how to drive a boat, right?” Andreas asks, one last ditch attempt. The man was raised in a town named after a lake. He can drive a boat. “Because I don’t.” “Yup,” Luke says. “Got my boating license and everything.” “And it hasn’t expired?” Andreas asks, without much hope. “They don’t,” Luke asks. “And they’re transferable?” Andreas asks. “Are Canadian licenses valid here?” He does not appreciate the fact Luke isn’t even bothering to hide his amusement at this point. “We probably aren’t going to catch anything,” Luke says. “And if we do we’ll just catch and release.” “So you’re not going to make me eat some radioactive three eyed trout?” Andreas asks. “I know you wouldn’t settle for less than radioactive salmon,” Luke says. “C’mon. Did you do your back?” “Did I suddenly become double-jointed?” Andreas asks. It comes out slightly waspish. He sounds like his mother. Teen Andreas would re-substantiate himself just to explode in horror. Luke doesn’t take it personally, judging by the sideways smile. “Want me to do your back? I know it’s early, but the UV’s high today.” “I guess,” Andreas says. It’s actually nice on the water. Not too hot, not yet, though the forecast tells him that’s not going to last, and there’s a nice breeze even once they anchor themselves somewhere Luke deems acceptable. No bugs, this far from shore. Andreas can see the appeal, at least of the water. He’s been told more than once he needs to relax more: sitting around doing nothing must count. Luke’s very active for someone trying to relax as well. He does his fishing thing, which seems to involve casting, swearing at himself, reeling the line in, and then casting again. Then there’s a ‘fuck’, and the cycle repeats itself. After the muttering’s escalated to ‘Morris you fucking idiot’, Luke finally seems satisfied, and settles down, eyes on the — bobbing thing. Andreas is afraid to ask what it’s called. Luke seems content watching it. He probably won’t even notice if Andreas takes this time to answer some emails, even if this trip’s supposed to be ‘low-key’ and ‘chill’ and ‘Andreas, put your phone away, seriously’. There’s no service. Andreas heads to the front of the boat. Starboard, he thinks. That’d make sense, right? The part going towards the stars? Metaphorically, at least. No service. He heads to the back of the boat, thinks he sees a bar, but then it’s gone. Holds his phone up, squinting, though he can’t tell through the glare. Fiddles with his screen brightness and then holds it up again. Turns around to see if he’ll have better luck if he grabs the cooler Luke packed lunch in and stands on it, only to see Luke looking at him instead of his bobby-thing, that ‘Andreas is ridiculous’ smile. Andreas hates that smile. Particularly because of how fond it always is, how rarely Luke seems to realize he’s even doing it, so Andreas knows it’s not performative, that Luke doesn’t mean to wear it all on his face the way he does. “You can look at me like that on dry land,” Andreas says. He sounds like his mother again. “No need to find the only place in the tristate area without service.” “I packed you a book,” Luke says. “A book,” Andreas mutters, but in the cooler, among the sandwiches and drinks, is a plastic back glittering with condensation. Three books, actually — a mystery, a hockey biography he’d been meaning to pick up, a memoir everyone seems to be reading right now. “You always say you wish you had more time to read,” Luke says. His smile’s lopsided when Andreas settles beside him, the boat rocking gently under them, Luke’s eyes on the lake and Andreas’ eyes on the page, crooked grin flashing wide and unburdened when Andreas kisses his sun warm shoulder, turns the page.

#SOTW #Andreas Krause #luke morris #fic snippet

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tobesolonely · 4 years ago

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birthday dinner

summary: harry and y/n’s daughter turns seventeen and reveals she has a boyfriend within the timespan of like, 2 days, and harry cannot process it </3

a/n: this gif has nothing to do with the story i just think he looks so hot❤️ i literally wrote this all today it just came to me... kinda proofread but kinda not?!

warnings: no smut but like one very brief mention of sex, fluff, maybe like 1 angsty part? kinda? not really , mentions of drinking alcohol

word count: ~3.6k

my ko-fi! thank you :)

let me know your thoughts!!

When you and Harry excitedly told your family and friends almost seventeen years ago that you were expecting your first (and unbeknownst to you at the time— your only) child, you were both over the moon. The people in your life who already had children told you to cherish every moment, the good and the bad because she’d be all grown up before you knew it. You took everyone’s advice graciously but of course, as an expectant mom, there was no way for your mind to even think that far ahead.

Everyone was right, though.

Now your daughter, Mona, was nearly seventeen— you felt like all you did was blink and she was this independent, beautiful, young woman. She was the perfect mix of both of you. She had her father’s kindness, patience, and determination. She had your willpower, grace, and wit. Neither one of you could be any more in love with the beautiful human being you’ve created.

In the months leading up to your daughter’s birthday, you constantly badgered her about how she wanted to celebrate. She would always respond with a nice dinner with you and Harry— unlike her father she tended to shy away from attention— but Harry wasn’t on board with the idea of anything that wasn’t a ginormous party.

“She doesn’t want that,” you told him one evening as you were setting the table for dinner. “You know how shy she gets. She’s not like you.” Harry rolls his eyes at your comment.

“I feel like tha’s supposed to be an insult, but I’ll ignore it,” he leans against the counter, arms crossed. “You only turn seventeen once. We gotta do somethin’ she’ll never forget.”

“Well, we’re not the ones turning seventeen, hmm? That was quite some time ago if I’m not mistaken.” Harry gives you a cheeky grin.

“So happy she’s not anything like us when we were seventeen. ‘Member all the shit we used to get into when we were her age?”

You laugh, shaking your head as you recall memories from your teenage years. “Yeah, we’re raising an absolute angel compared to what we were.” Your husband hums in agreement, walking the short distance to the dining table to snake his arms around your waist from behind.

“Speaking of our little angel,” he places wet kisses to your neck. “Still got a bit of time until she’s home from volleyball practice, haven’t we?”

You move away from Harry, giving him a warning look. “You’re insatiable, I swear! I’m still recovering from last night,” Harry laughs at how dramatic you were being. “We’re not as young as we used to be, y’know.”

“Oi, don’t remind me, love,” he places a quick smack to your butt, walking out of the room before you can reprimand him.

Just as you finish tossing the salad and reach for your phone to check and see where your daughter is, she walks through the front door, tossing her sports gear in a messy pile at her feet.

“Mom, dad,” she calls loudly. “I’m home!”

“You don’t have to tell us,” Harry calls back from upstairs, probably in his office. “Can smell you from all the way up here.”

You giggle silently to yourself, already able to see the look of annoyance on your daughter’s face. She rounds the corner and appears before you in the doorway of the kitchen, her curly hair a mess and her face slick with sweat.

“Hi mom,” she chirps sweetly, a dimpled grin on her face. “What’s for dinner? I’m starving, mom. Our coach made us run sooooo much today and we had to do all this conditioning and my legs literally feel like jelly.”

Your daughter reaches her hand in the salad bowl to grab a cucumber and you quickly slap it away, tsking loudly. “Mona! I haven’t seen you wash your hands yet!”

“Mom, my hands are clean. I used hand sanitizer when I got in my car after practice,” she tells you matter-of-factly, rolling her big, brown eyes at you. “You’re such a germaphobe.”

“What’s this ‘bout callin’ your mum a germaphobe?” Harry walks into the kitchen, his curls now pulled back with one of his daughter’s many headbands. He presses a kiss to the top of her sweaty head and wrinkles his nose. “Yeah Mo, you smell a bit. Why don’t you go get washed up before we eat?”

“Dad,” your daughter responds, clearly exasperated. “You don’t understand. I’m literally starving.”

“Mo,” Harry imitates your daughter. “You don’t understand. You literally smell like shit.”

Your eyes widen and you smack Harry on the chest as he bursts out laughing, not being able to help himself once he sees the annoyed look on his daughter’s face. “Don’t be an ass!” you scold, placing your hands on your hips. “She’s hungry. She can wash up after.”

“Thanks, mom,” Mona says, turning her head dramatically to face you. “Dad is so mean sometimes.”

“I’m just messin’ with ya, Mo,” Harry tells your daughter, nudging her gently. “You smellin’ like shit jus’ means you’re workin’ hard at practice. So I’m proud of you.” Your daughter rolls her eyes for what seems like the hundredth time since she walked in the door, quickly moving away from your husband to wash her hands.

“You’re seriously so annoying,” Mona mumbles, shaking her wet hands all over the tiled kitchen floor. “Can we eat now? I think I’ll faint if we don’t eat now. Seriously, guys.”

Your daughter takes her usual seat at the table, immediately reaching for the salad bowl and filling her plate. She avoids all the tomatoes and onions, opting for just lettuce, carrots, and cucumbers. She watches you closely as you take the lasagna out of the oven and you swear you see her drool a little bit.

“So,” Harry says after you and Mona have fixed your plates. “Your birthday’s comin’ up, Mo.”

Mona shoves a big forkful of lasagna in her mouth, wiping her mouth with a paper towel before speaking. “Yeah, two days.” She has a big smile on her face. “I’m so excited, dad. Did you and mom look into that place I showed you? For dinner?”

“Yeah, about that,” Harry takes a sip of water. “Y’sure you just want a dinner? No party? Your mum and I can put together a party for you last minute with no problem, bub.”

“Dad, I already told you that I’m not really into parties like that.”

“But you’re turnin’ seventeen.”

“How is it any different from sixteen?”

“Mo–”

“Harry,” you interrupt, placing your hand over his. “It’s her birthday. If she just wants a nice dinner with us then so be it.”

“Actually…” your daughter looks between the both of you. “I wanted to know if I could bring a friend.”

“‘Course y’can, Mo,” Harry’s eyes light up. “You can bring as many people as you want, darlin’. Jus’ lemme know ahead of time so I can make the reservations…” He trails off, already making a mental note to ask his assistant about making reservations for Mona’s restaurant of choice.

“Well,” Mona begins picking at her cuticles, one of her nervous habits. “It’s just one friend. Uh, a boy. I mean, I guess he’s more than a friend. He’s kinda like, my boyfriend?” Your daughter has a giddy look on her face, but it’s quickly replaced with that of fear when she sees the incredulous look her father has.

“A boyfriend? You have a boyfriend, Mona?” he slams his fork down on his plate. “Since when? What did your mum and I tell you about dating?”

“I don’t know dad, it’s new! Why do I have to wait until I’m in college to date but you and mom have been together since you were my age? How is that fair?” Your daughter is staring back at your husband, beyond irritated.

“I know what sixteen-year-old boys are like, Mo! I was one!” Harry raises his voice. “Absolutely not, Mona. You’re not allowed to date and he’s not allowed to join us.”

“He’s seventeen, for your information. And anyway, I’m sure sixteen-year-old boys are different today than they were fifty years ago,” your daughter retorts, standing up and grabbing her plate of food. “I’m eating in my room. You’re being annoying.”

“I just turned forty and you know it, Mona,” Harry calls after her. Your daughter says nothing in response and you’re met with the sound of her door slamming shortly after. Harry looks at you in disbelief.

“Did you not hear anything our daughter just said, Y/N?” the vein in his forehead is prominent and you know your husband is just as upset as Mona is.

“I did,” you start slowly, not wanting to add fuel to the fire. “I mean, she has a point. Why did we decide she wasn’t allowed to date until college when we were together at her age?”

“Y/N,” Harry says, clearly annoyed. “We were jus’ talkin’ about the shit we used to get into when we were her age. Isn’t that what bein’ a parent is? Not wanting your kid to make the same bad choices as you did?”

You scoff at your husband. “So now you’re saying our being together was a bad choice?”

“Love, you know that’s not what I meant.”

“Harry,” you sigh. “We can’t shelter her forever. That’s not fair to her. She needs to go out and make mistakes and have fun and figure things out for herself. Who knows, this boy could be the man she–”

“Please don’t,” Harry cuts you off, knowing what you were getting at. “I don’t even want to think about that.”

“Harry, I think you know that we need to give this guy a chance. We can’t make any judgments until we meet him for ourselves, and I think Mo’s birthday dinner would be the perfect time to do that.”

“But Y/N,” your husband whines, clearly completely against the idea. “I don’t wanna encourage it.”

“You’re being a child,” you tell him, annoyance lacing your voice. “Mona’s bringing her boyfriend to her birthday dinner and that’s that. If we meet him and he’s just a terrible human being, then we can re-visit this conversation. If you don’t think you can be an adult and be supportive of our daughter’s relationship, just keep it to yourself.”

“Y/N–”

“I’m eating dinner somewhere else, too,” you tell him, standing up from the table and grabbing your plate. “You can join me when you want to be a mature adult. Oh, and apologize to our daughter.”

“Love–”

Slam!

The tension in your household is thick in the two days leading up to your daughter’s birthday. Whenever Harry enters a room she’s in she quickly leaves, not wanting to talk to her father. Harry doesn’t make any effort to speak to her, either. Harry upsetting your daughter, in turn, makes you upset with him. You find yourself much quicker to snap at him than you usually are. He busies himself with work to distract himself from the fact that both of you are pissed at him.

On the morning of your daughter’s birthday, there’s still tension, but you and Harry try to put it aside for the sake of Mona.

“Happy birthday to you,” Harry sings quietly as you enter your daughter’s bedroom, a big stack of pancakes with a ‘17’ candle stuck in the top in your hands. “Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday dearest Mona, happy birthday to you.”

You both sit on the edge of your daughter’s bed as she groans, pulling her comforter up higher over her head. “You guys, it’s so early.”

“Mona, don’t be a grouch! You’re seventeen today,” you hand Harry the plate of pancakes, pulling her covers down. “C’mon missy, make a wish.”

Mona sits up and tries to give you both her best annoyed-face but you know she’s not actually mad, far too excited about her birthday, and the day ahead of her. She was just telling you the night before how happy she was that her birthday fell on a Saturday this year, too.

She closes her eyes for a brief second before blowing out the candles on her birthday pancakes. “Thanks, mom and dad. I feel like things have been a little bit, I dunno, weird? Since I told you about Noah. I really love you both though. I’m sorry I didn’t talk about things with you first.”

Harry leans over to place a kiss on the top of her head. “‘M sorry I blew up on ya like that, princess. It’s jus’ hard for me to know you’re growin’ up. Your happiness is the most important thing in this world to me though so if he makes you happy, I’m gonna give him a chance.”

You smile at the sweet moment between your husband and daughter. At the end of the day, your daughter was a huge daddy’s girl and although you gave both of them a hard time about it, nothing made your heart more full than their special bond.

“Dad, you’ll seriously love him. He’s literally so funny,” she gushes and Harry just nods, taking a bite of her pancakes. “He’ll even laugh at your dad jokes. Like, he thinks shit like that is funny.”

“Language, Mo,” Harry warns. “He really likes dad jokes, though?” Your husband sounds a little too hopeful, causing you to giggle.

“Yeah, dad. He always tries to tell me his jokes and I’m just like, ‘Ew, stop! You sound like my dad!’. Oh, he loves One Direction by the way.”

“What about my solo stuff?”

“He thinks it’s cool,” she says nonchalantly, causing you to stifle more laugher. Harry continues nibbling on her pancakes, a troubled look on his face. “Can you guys go out while I change? I’ll be downstairs in like, two seconds.”

“Sure thing, Mo,” you tell your daughter, taking her plate of pancakes from Harry before he eats them all. “Do you want me to make your coffee or anything?”

“It’s okay, mom. Noah said he was gonna drop off coffee for me this morning,” she looks down, a small smile on her face. “I guess you and dad can meet him before dinner then if you want?”

You see Harry tense up slightly out of the corner of your eye but he surprises you by staying calm. “Sounds great, poppet. Your mum and I will be downstairs.” He places a quick peck on your daughter’s cheek and quickly walks out of her room, leaving you to follow after him.

“You okay?” you ask him quietly once you’re out of earshot of your daughter’s room. He nods quickly.

“Yeah love, all is well,” he assures, but his facial expression says otherwise.

“I’m sure Mona was just giving you a hard time. I’m sure Noah enjoys your solo stuff just like anyone else does.” You try to reassure your husband, standing on your toes to give him a kiss. You feel Harry smiling into the kiss and you pull back, a look of confusion on your face. “What’s wrong?”

“S’not that, love,” he says. “I jus’ wasn’t ready to meet him now. Thought I had all day to mentally prepare.”

“Don’t be dramatic,” you warn, moving to pour yourself a cup of coffee. “Please don’t do anything to embarrass her.”

“I know, Y/N,” Harry says exasperatedly. “I’m not that terrible. I know how to control–”

“He’s here,” your daughter informs the both of you as she runs down the stairs and hurries by. You catch a whiff of the expensive Gucci perfume Harry got you a couple of years prior and you make a mental note to tell Harry to pick her up a bottle of her own when he gets the chance.

Harry’s face is a little pale and if you didn’t know any better, you’d of thought he just saw a ghost. “Are you okay, H? It’ll be okay.” You rub small circles on his back. Your daughter flings open the door and immediately envelops her boyfriend in a tight hug and you can’t help but let out an audible, ‘aw’. He has balloons, coffee, donuts, and a card that you’re sure your daughter will never let either one of you ever read.

She invites him inside, bouncing from excitement and what you assumed to be nerves. “Mom, dad. This is Noah.”

He immediately extends his hand, nearly dropping Mona’s coffee in the process. He chuckles nervously and quickly hands it to her before holding his hand out again. “Hi, Mr. and Mrs. Styles. It’s, um, it’s nice to meet you both. Uh, thank you for allowing me to join in on Mo’s birthday dinner tonight.”

You reach out to shake his hand and give him a warm smile. “It’s so nice to meet you, Noah. Please, call me Y/N– I feel like Mrs. Styles kinda makes me sound a bit old.” Mona rolls her eyes at this, taking a sip at her coffee. There’s an awkward silence and you nudge Harry, waiting for him to say something.

“Mr. Styles is fine with me. It’s great to meet you, Noah,” Harry says gruffly. Noah nods and looks over at Mona, clearly uncomfortable.

“We’re gonna go upstairs,” she informs you, grabbing Noah’s hand and leading the way.

“Door stays open,” Harry calls after her. “Don’t let me come upstairs and see your door’s closed, Mona.”

Your daughter turns to look at you, widening her eyes in embarrassment. You shake your head at Harry and go back to fixing your cup of coffee. “Harry, you’re so horrible. I’d be mortified if I was them.”

“Good. That’s what I was tryin’ to do,” he goes next to you and picks up your coffee mug, taking a sip. “S’good. Can I have this one?”

“Harry!” you give him an amused look. “Make your own cup!”

“You make it taste so good though, love,” Harry gives you that look that he knows you can never say no to, and you sigh before giving in and handing him the cup of coffee you just made.

“Whatever happens with Mo and Noah, I hope he’s not as big of a fuckin’ pest as you are.”

“This place is amazing,” you tell your husband, completely in awe. You were out to dinner at the tallest rooftop restaurant in all of Los Angeles, seventy-three floors above the ground. You could look out and see the entire city and although you were normally terrified of heights, the view left you speechless.

“Mo’s the one that picked it,” he tells you, leaning over to whisper in your ear. He has his arm slung around you as he gently rubs your shoulder. “Gonna drink with me tonight, hm? They got some fancy soundin’ drinks on this menu.”

“One drink,” you emphasize. “I don’t wanna wake up with a hangover.”

“Mom, isn’t this place so cool? Can you take a picture of us?” your daughter hands you her phone, leaning closer to Noah. You feel Harry tense beside you but he doesn’t say anything.

“It’s very cool, Mona. I think you have expensive taste like your dad,” you joke, holding up her phone. “Okay, one, two, three.”

You snap multiple pictures of your daughter, remembering how she always told you that the only way to take pictures was to take at least twenty at a time to leave options open when deciding which picture to post on Instagram. You hand the phone back to Mona and she thanks you, analyzing the pictures with her boyfriend. Their heads are touching and your expression softens as you think back to how you and Harry always found reasons to be close to each other when you were your daughter’s age.

The night goes beautifully. Your daughter has a big smile on her face the entire time and Harry even refrains from being unnecessarily overprotective, opting to let Mona enjoy herself and be close to her boyfriend. The more drinks he throws back the more he engages in conversation with Noah, even answering his burning questions about One Direction.

When the waitress comes around to give Mona her slice of birthday cake and sing ‘Happy Birthday’ with the wait staff your husband is singing the loudest, slightly off-tune due to how inebriated he was. Your daughter laughs, hiding her face in her hands.

“Mom, dad’s being embarrassing,” she groans. You know she’s not actually mad but you nudge him, warning him to knock it off.

As you’re getting ready to leave, Harry tells everyone to wait, hiccuping before speaking. “Wait. I’ve got somethin’ to say.” He’s slurring slightly and you laugh, signaling for your daughter and Noah to sit back down.

“Noah,” Harry starts. Mona gives you a worried look and you’re debating whether or not you should interrupt Harry, not knowing what he was going to say. “I’ve seen the way you’ve been lookin’ at Mo all night and makin’ her laugh. Swear she hasn’t stopped smilin’ since we got here. I like that, Noah.” You decide not to interrupt your husband’s drunken rambling.

“Thank you, sir–”

“I had my doubts at first,” he continues on, taking another sip of his drink. “What dad wouldn’t? She’s my baby girl. Don’t care if she’s seventeen, she’ll be my baby ‘til the day I die. You make her so happy though, and I appreciate that.” He holds up his finger, gesturing for them to give him a second while he thinks about his next words.

“Don’t call me sir, makes me sound old. Call me Harry.”

#harry styles #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles fluff #harry styles x reader #harry styles one shot #harry styles blurb #harry styles x y/n #harry styles fic #dad!harry

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avinaccia · 3 years ago

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A Completely Objective and Logical Ranking of Every Hetalia Character Song

New character songs are dropping, I have too much time on my hands, let’s go.

Also here’s a Youtube playlist for the ~✨nostalgia✨~

Bring it on in the tags

71. Ah Legendary Class⭐The Awesome Me Highway [Prussia]: Absolutely tearing it up on the drums and on the vocal cords alike (I pray for Atsushi Kousaka). Great for the memes.

70. Happy Thoughts Museum [???]: This is listed as an official song but I had literally never heard of the title. Then I listened to it and BAM! Smack back to 2013 watching the teasers for the show on Funimation. Not sure I’d count it as a character song though...

69. (Nice) My Song that is written by me for me [Prussia]: Deafened me but I can appreciate the industrial grind.

68. My House is...Quiet. ~With the Trolls~ [Norway]: I have never heard this song, nor can I find any version of it online. By default it goes here and I am so sorry Norge.

67. Make a Wish to Santa♪ [Sealand]: The discordant notes and childish exuberance only serve to make this sound like a demonic plea to Santa to eliminate the singer’s enemies.

66. Heaven and Hell on Earth [Rome]: Rome sounds like he’s been in the corner of a restroom. Extra points for the metal version, minus points for the fact that the beach scene was replayed like 1764 times.

65. Canada Complete Introduction [Canada]: Quiet af until Kumacheerio shows up and blows out your speakers. they did you dirty my darling 😔

64. It’s Easy!!! [America]: I don't think any video of this has ever stayed up for more than 20 seconds. Sounds cool, but like I was listening to 20 different genres at once, someone make him calm down.

63. Bù Zàiyì the Small Stuff ☆ [China]: I cannot for the life of me find the complete song anywhere, clips have a cool beat though

62. Let's Boil Hot Water♪ [Italy]: Exactly what it says on the tin..though a bit too close to elevator music for my tastes.

61. The Fragrance of Early Summer [Japan]: Very ‘from the books’ Japan-esque song

60. Peace Sounds Nice…[Baltic Trio]: All well and good until the radio demon shows up

59. W●D●C ~World Dancing~ [America]: How a song can sound like it’s from 4 different decades at once is beyond me

58. Overflowing Passion [BFT]: This is just drunken karaoke and I have 0 clue what’s going on #iconicforallthewrongreasons

57. Ren●Ren●Renaissance♪ [Rome+Chibitalia]: Wholesome Grandpa with Grandson content - barring the fact that Italy sounds on the verge of a nervous breakdown and Rome has had too much wine.

56. Roma Antiqua [Rome]: Similar energy to any one of China’s songs - there’s a part of the song where it sounds like he’s singing in the shower, and I will never not laugh at [CENSORED]

55. Country From Where the Sun Rises, Zipangu [Japan]: Very chill, very Japan, but just meh for me.

54. Moon Over Emei Shan [China]: Good message, okay song.

53. My Friend [England]: What a mind palace you must have Mr. Kirkland

52. With Love, from Iceland [Iceland]: Three words: Heavy. Metal. Puffin.

51. Having Friends is Nice...♫ [Russia]: Russia is the cutest thing ever

50. Mm. [Sweden]: Smooth transition from WWE Smackdown to shopping at IKEA.

49. Why don’t you come over? ~Beyond the Northern Lights~ [Iceland]: I don’t want to be mean but...this does sound like the second closing theme to an anime whose first closing was much more popular (à la Soul Eater)

48. Gakuen☆Festa [Germany, Italy, Japan]: Sounds like a 60s song of the summer but oh dear their voices do not go together. Hella cute though.

47. Wa! Wa!! World Ondo [Main Cast]: One time I travelled 10 hours in a coach bus with a bunch of teenagers to a city of note in my country, and the only souvenir I bought was the fucking PAINT IT WHITE DVD. Perfectly chaotic, UN ĐĕùX~~

46. In the Bluebell Woods [England]: In the album cover for this song he’s holding a guitar but this is not a rock song. Still has ‘running through the hills’ levels of dramatism though.

45. Poi Poi Poi♪ [Taiwan]: You’re telling me that Taiwan, someone whose has *ONE LINE* in Beautiful World (which is criminal tbh what kind of representation-) managed to get an eNTIRE CHARACTER SONG???????

44. White Flame [Russia]: There’s something to be said for a song that is 3x the length of any Hetalia episode

43. Ich liebe… [Germany]: Baking cakes for your friends has never been so wholesome.

42. We Wish you a Merry Christmas [America, China, England, France, Russia]: Nice to see they’ve gotten their shit together since United Nations Sta-hmm.

41. Ah, Worldwide à la mode [France]: Sounds like a Disney Princess song, hard not to picture France frolicking in a field of flowers.

40. Che Bello! ~My House is the Greatest!⭐~ [Italy]: Would not be out of place in an advertisement for Sea World.

39. May You Smile Today [Japan]: THE feel good song of the summer

38. Let’s Look Behind the Rainbow [Italy]: I will protect you.

37. I'm your HERO☆ [America]: “Anyone who’s sad or sullen will be arrested” did NOT age well.

36. Mein Gott! [Prussia]: Alternating headphone effect at the beginning is cool, so is the confidence...the actual singing on the other hand...

35. Nihao⭐China [China]: Listen, all of China’s character songs are great, I just can’t vibe with this one like some of the others.

34. Pechka ~Light My Heart~ [Russia]: I’m still having difficulty wrapping my head around the fact that this and Winter were released at the same time.

33. Pukapuka⭐Vacation [Germany, Italy, Japan]: Seems just a bit too much like they’re running on a treadmill that’s picking up speed and trying to sing at the same time. Peppy.

32. Santa Claus is Coming to Town [Germany, Italy, Japan]: This is unironically the best song sung by this trio; can only vibe with for two months out of the year though.

31. Excuse Me, I Am Sorry [Japan]: Japan’s character traits speedrun. Gives me barbershop quartet vibes for some reason but is catchy as hell.

30. The Story of Snow and Dreams [Russia]: A superhero anime opening in the making

29. England’s Evil Demon Summoning Song [England]: Sir that is not how you roast a marshmallow, don’t cut yourself on that edge.

28. Moi Moi Sauna♪ [Finland]: Exactly the type of song you’d expect and it’s wonderful

27. United Nations Star⭐ [America, China, England, France, Russia]: This isn’t as much of a song as it is a four minute struggle for everyone to sing without America yelling every 5 seconds...Like a particularly musical episode of Hetalia.

26. Paris is Indeed Splendid [France]: Paris-pa-pa-pa-paris

25. Absolutely Invincible British Gentleman [England]: Poppy, rocky, polka-dotty

24. Vorwärts Marsch! [Germany]: To quote the comment section: “This sounds like a German version of I’ll Make a Man out of you.” There’s some truth to that.

23. Hamburger Street [America]: The product of America’s rapper phase. 8/10 because he’s trying so hard and because I can unironically sing along to all of this.

22. Hoi Sam☆Nice Guy [Hong Kong]: A song that would absolutely destroy the ankles of anyone in DDR.

21. I Am German-Made [Germany]: There was once a version that had Germany and Prussia singing at the same time and it sounded positively demonic and Broadway could never

20. La pasión no se detiene ~Unstoppable Passion~ [Spain]: Talented, brilliant, incredible, amazing, show-stopping...

19. Fall in Love, Mademoiselle [France]: Sounds like it should be in Mozart Opera Rock, I have kiss kiss falled in love.

18. Embrace the Très Bien Moi [France]: This is the definition of SELF LOVE PEOPLE.

17. Carrot and Stick [Belarus&Ukraine]: Absolutely DRIPPING in 2000s power ballad energy. The type of song that plays on repeat in the mind of the widow whose millionaire husband ‘mysteriously disappeared’ (and the only legit character song ever acknowledged by the anime)

16. C.B.C (Cowboyz Boot Camp) Vol. 1 [America]: AH MAH GAWWDDD

15. Winter [Russia]: Heavy metal fever dream and the perfect song for an angst-ridden teenager

14. Seychelles Here ⭐ Vacation Island [Seychelles]: UN👏DER👏RA👏TED SONG👏OF 👏THE 👏SUM👏MER👏

13. Nah, it will settle itself somehow [Romano]: One day I aspire to reach this level of chill

12. Let’s Enjoy Today [England]: I will never not feel happy when listening to this.

11. Einsamkeit [Germany]: Ludwig manages to air every single one of his worries about not being good enough compared to his friends and always being perceived as mean or uptight when he’s actually just a softie and now my heart hurts. 💔

10. Aiyaa Four Thousand Years [China]: A very poignant and beautiful song about the passage of time and the inevitability of its passing; comparable to an ancient ballad complete with explosive crescendos and meaningful lyrics.

9. Bon Bon Bon❤️C’est Bon C’est Bon! [France]: Peppy, cheerful, adorable, groundbreaking; has been my alarm tone for six years and I’ve yet to tire of it. 9/10 The moaning interspersed throughout has been an interesting wake-up call.

8. Let’s Enjoy! Let’s Get Excited! Cheers! [Denmark]: This is on par with Everytime we Touch by Cascada in terms of rage potential unlocked (the good kind)

7. Dream Journey [Japan]: Whoever’s playing the shakuhachi is absolutely KILLING IT. Dramatic, wonderful, great metaphors.

6. Gourmet’s Heart Beginner Level [China]: Absolute banger, I’m a vegetarian but this would inspire me to eat shumai.

5. Always with you...Nordic Five! [Nordic FIVVVVVEEEE]: Everyone harmonizes beautifully except for Denmark. Extremely catchy, number placement seemed appropriate.

4. Pub and GO! [England]: I love this trash man

3. Maji Kandou⭐Hong Kong Night [Hong Kong]: If you thought Denmark’s song was a banger JUST YOU WAIT. I WILL BLOW OUT MY SPEAKERS LISTENING TO LO-HA-SU.

2. Steady Rhythmus [Germany]: THIS SONG IS METAL AF. Seriously, if it can be classified as ‘hardcore’ by my father and his group of 50-somethings who have decided to single-handedly gatekeep the metal and hardrock genres, it can do anything.

1. The Delicious Tomato Song 🍅 [Romano]: Beautiful, absolutely awe-inspiring, poignant, catchy lyrics with an extremely deep meaning that only years of meticulous research and analysis can unlock, Romano I love you.

BONUS: Closing Songs

5. Hatafutte Parade (World Series)

4. Hetalian⭐Jet (The World Twinkle): The song is good, the dancing is cursed

3. Chikyuu Marugoto Hug Shitainda (World⭐Stars)

2. Marukaite Chikyuu (Hetalia: Axis Powers): nE NE PaPA

1. Mawaru Chikyuu Rondo (The Beautiful World)

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deanmarywinchester · 4 years ago

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definitive ranking of Tortall love interests

oh boy. i loved the Tortall books as a kid and i am having a blast on my reread, but one thing that I almost uniformly dislike about them is their romance plots. it’s the rare Tortall love interest who isn’t creepy in some way, much older than the protagonist, or just plain boring. so to go along with my ranking, each dude will get a ranking on a Creep Scale (0-10, with 0 being a normal nice dude and 10 being a huge creep), and an Interest Index (10 being extremely charming and interesting and 0 being more boring than a rock). without further ado, the ranking:

8: liam ironarm: just, the Absolute bottom of the barrel. I can only assume he must have been extremely hot and an extremely good fighter for alanna to be even remotely interested in getting past his condescension and infantilization toward her. dude, she’s the lioness, not your “kitten.” ugh. Creep Scale: 9. Interest Index: 8 (he is the Shang Dragon)

7: numair salmalin: the duality of man: charming, intelligent, an unmatched mage, based on Jeff Goldblum, probably slept with the emperor of carthak--but also thought it was cool to date his teenage student when he was literally twice her age. gross! someone on this site once said “it wasn’t his fault, he’s a victim of tammy’s teacher kink” and i haven't stopped thinking about it since. Creep Scale: STRONG 10. Interest Index: also 10. duality of man indeed.

6: cleon of kennan: now, here’s the thing. there’s nothing WRONG with cleon. he’s nice, he’s a good knight, whatever. but from a narrative perspective, he’s just so extremely dull. on the other hand, I guess that makes him the perfect dude for kel to imprint on before she realizes romance isn't for her. Creep Scale: 0. Interest Index: 3.

5: jonathan of conte: hm. jonathan is so hard to rank because he’s a solid friend when he’s not having his WWRLaM-era breakdown, but honestly I don’t think he’s ever a good love interest. he can’t wrap his head around the fact that alanna is both alanna his girlfriend AND alan his comrade, and seems to treat her like two different people depending on whether she’s in battle or in his bed. Creep Scale: 5 for the WWRLaM-era breakdown and being a colonizer (er, excuse me, Voice). Interest Index: 9 for being a prince and a good friend

4: dale rowan: if you’re going to have a first fling, you could do a lot worse than dale. he’s funny, he’s charming, he’s upfront about the fact that this won’t be a serious relationship, but he's loyal as long as he’s with you. a solid dude and canonically good in bed. Creep Scale: 0. Interest Index: 7.

3: george cooper: a roguish thief character who’s still an almost weirdly honorable man? immediately imprints on “alan” and jon and vows to protect them? encourages alanna to be nothing less than herself? grows up to be a good dad? near perfection. 12-year-old me was smitten. Creep Scale: 3.5 for the age gap. Interest Index: 10.

2: nawat crow: pros: is literally a crow spirit. cons: is literally a crow spirit. pretty cool, pretty weird, and he definitely treats Aly right. top marks. Creep Scale: 1, but only because crows don’t know about things like human boundaries so it took him a hot sec to be normal. Interest Index: 9 (he’s a crow spirit!)

1: farmer cooper: [griffin mcelroy voice] now THERE’S a boy I can get into. himbo-passing by choice but funny, smart, and a great self-taught embroidery mage by nature, farmer cooper is hands down the best Tortall love interest. he respects beka, he braids her hair for her, he took her name when they married, he kissed her for the first time in a dungeon while they faced death--what more could you want? Creep Scale: -100. Interest Index: 9.

#feel free to argue with me but i am a farmer cooper stan blog now fdhdkjdskhjdfshk #my posts #tamora pierce #tortall

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creativeashproductions · 4 years ago

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Lost Time II // Luke Patterson

Summary: Weeks after discovering his greatest joy Luke visits his former girlfriend to make up for the lost time. Unable to do it alone his band gives their support to find her and stand by his side as he faces his greatest regret.

Warning: Talk of death, allusion to homophobic parents, teen pregnancy and angst

Words: 3.1k

The book Midnight Club by Christopher Pike came out in 1994 but to fit this fic the book came out in 1993. Also, Alex’s last name will be Mitchell in this.

*For the sake of the story the time frame has been altered, it takes place in the mid-2000s. Also! I tried to make the reader as generalized as I could to make sure that everyone can relate. The reader is Alex’s sister, for inclusion that can be biological, adopted, half or stepsiblings. I want to make sure all people can be the reader.

A/N: Jesus I love Ben with my entire heart and I am a cruel person to have ripped Luke and Ben from each other before they had a chance. Enjoy!

Part One

Masterlist

Los Angeles, 1993

A sunny summer day spent outside reading a new book that had come out recently nestled in your hands under the large tree. The tree that had many tire swings before your parents caved to get a swing set. Now the tree was a companion on lovely days providing shade under the hot sun.

Alex was at band practice with the rest of Sunset Curve in the garage, or studio as Luke deemed it. More often than not, you would be in the studio watching them rehearse, but things changed, things had gotten more serious with Luke in the past six or so months. Plus, Bobby seriously was someone you wanted the least amount of time spent with.

“Hey.” Luke sighed, dropped on the faded blanket you had settled on. Raising one finger, you finished the page before placing the bookmark in.

“Hi.” You grinned leaning in as he pressed a kiss to your soft lips, “Used my Chapstick again?”

Luke hid his face in the crook of your neck, “I’m addicted to it, or it’s just your lips.”

He snuck another kiss before nudging you to adjust lay against his chest between his legs, a familiar position. One where you could read a book, and he could wrap his one arm around you while he wrote in his songbook with the other. God, you loved the boy with your entire heart.

“How’s the book?”

“It’s okay.”

“What’s it about?” Luke asked, wrapping his arms around your midsection.

“Five terminally ill teens living in a hospice tell scary stories every night. They all made a pact together that whoever died first would have to try to contact the others.” You sighed, dropping the book beside you to rest your arms on his.

“Sounds depressing.” Luke hummed, pressing a kiss to your neck, “I can think of more exciting things to do.”

“Over my dead body.” Alex snickered walking passed the young couple on his walk to the house. Reggie following after him with a laugh of his own; it was still odd to see Luke so loved up.

“I was talking about going to a concert!” Luke called out as his friends entered the Mitchell house, leaving the couple alone.

“You totally were not.” You spoke already knowing the answer as Luke nodded his head, “It’s a shock he lets us be alone.”

Turning to face Luke, you couldn’t help the blush that grew from the soft look in his eyes that you had only noticed after he asked you out. The boy had had a crush for a long time even if it was awkward given the previous thing he had with Alex.

“He’ll have to get used to it.”

“So, have you gotten a gig at The Orpheum yet?” You asked, shifting again to nestle against his side content to spend the time there in the backyard.

“Nah, we booked some smaller venues, but we’ll get there. I know it.” Luke was completely confident that one day he would be playing in the most popular venues. The other thing he was confident was his relationship.

“Where will I be?” You spoke looking at the recently turned sixteen-year-old boy who had quickly become the most important thing in your life. Never expected to fall in love with Alex’s ex-fling.

“Cheering us on. Have to have my number one supporter and wife because she’s been there since the dream began. The dream just expanded?”

“Wife?” You breathed.

“I’m not dating you just to date. I’m dating you because when I dream of my future, you are right there next to me.” Luke admitted caressing your cheek the pad of his thumb, “Wherever in the world, we find ourselves I want you there.”

“What about kids?”

“We’ll have as many as you want. Or however many we are lucky to have.” Luke breathed growing more excited as he finally revealed his ideas and firm belief, “Of course I want to be married first. After The Orpheum I want the next thing to focus one hundred percent on is a wedding that you deserve and-“

“Ask me.”

“What?”

“Ask me.” You raised to your knees cradling his face in your hands, “That’s what I dream of too. Having a career but something that lets me travel with the love of my life and my chosen family.”

“It’s not how I want…I want it to be special and romantic because you deserve it.” Luke adamantly spoke, pressing his hands on yours still resting on his face.

“Luke. I love you. Just sitting here like we are is special and romantic.”

“Will you marry me?” Luke whispered, leaning to press his forehead on yours. The orange beanie tickling your skin.

“Yes. As soon as I turn eighteen.” You didn’t care if you had two more years to wait. As long as Luke was by your side, you didn’t care about how you got married just as long as you married him.

Los Angeles, 2004

There are times that Reggie knows that the last thing people need is his goofy personality and jokes. When Luke returned from wherever he had gone, it was evident that something had drastically changed since the last time they had seen him.

“Luke?” Reggie gently spoke hesitantly moving to the boy curled on the couch, sobbing into his hands. Reggie had never seen Luke like this before, not even when it cemented that they had died and Luke’s future with Y/N shattered in a moment.

“Reg-“ Alex poofed in next going stock still at the distraught teenager. His eyes widened as he quickly made his way to Luke, “What’s wrong?”

“I-I saw Y/N.” Luke choked out, shaking his head, “I knew it would hurt, but it felt like I died again. Like I literally watched my hopes and dream just shatter before me.”

Alex was quiet taking in that Luke had seen Y/N. Alex missed his sister with everything in him, but Luke had plans.

“How is she?” Alex whispered, grabbing the hands of one of his best friends in the entire world. The one guy he had wholly trusted with his sister’s heart.

“She looks so good. God, it’s been nine years for her but only a few weeks for me. She’s more beautiful than I remember.” Luke breathed, raising teary eyes to meet Alex and Reggie’s concerned expressions, “I also saw Ben.”

“She got married?” Alex questioned surprised, “Please tell me it isn’t Bobby. I don’t think I could stomach that.”

“His name isn’t Ben and he probably tried after deciding on a respectable time for it to be okay-“

“Reggie.” Alex hissed motioning him to stop talking while Luke knew that Bobby had had feelings for you, he didn’t think he would try anything.

“I don’t think she’s married, but Ben is definitely a big part of what I missed out on.” Luke sighed, picking at a loose thread on his jeans, “I’m sure you know that in the three years, I was actually alive and with her that things happened.”

“Things like…?” Alex trailed off having a feeling he wouldn’t want to know about whatever Luke was hesitant to announce.

“Um…well we were, I am in love.” Luke grimaced at how odd it was to word his feelings for a girl he had died while planning a future, “in relationships you show affection in particular-“

“Okay as you struggle to finish that I will.” Reggie spoke, turning to Alex, “Luke and Y/N as a couple were having sex.”

Alex’s eyes went wide at the blunt statement that he never wanted to hear again in his life because you were his sister! He didn’t need to even think of anything to do other than the kissing he sometimes walked in on. He knew already but didn’t want to know either.

“I died, leaving Y/N pregnant! Which I didn’t know about.” Luke shouted poofing to the other side of the garage when he saw Alex’s fist start to clench. He poofed to the loft when Alex appeared to his last place, “C’mon man!”

“You knocked my sister up!”

Reggie’s mouth dropped at the physical aggression that Alex was showing because Alex was more peaceful and non-violent.

“I didn’t know! He’s eight!” Luke yelped when Alex grabbed him in a headlock, “Dude! I didn’t know! We were gonna get married when she turned eighteen! I love her, man!”

Reggie pulled Alex away from the lead guitarist before a fight happened, and even though part of Reggie wanted to see Alex fight…he wanted Luke here as well.

Alex was quiet, “What does he look like?”

Despite the agony of not being there for his son Luke launched into a description of the little boy.

With a white lie out of Julie’s mouth, she had gotten the address from Emily and Mitch for Luke and Alex. The address led to a small house with pretty flowers and a bike in the front yard; the place where Luke’s son had been growing up in since he was two years old.

Julie’s fist raised, knocking on the white door listening as footsteps sounded on the other side of the door. The door opened, revealing a little boy with startling green eyes that he inherited from his father.

“Benjamin Lucas!” You huffed turning the corner with a frown, “You may be eight, but you are still not allowed to open the door alone!”

The little boy slouched at the greeting before his eyes met three boys behind the Peurto Rican pretty girl.

“Oh my god. He looks just like you!” Alex hissed to Luke unable to remove his gaze from his…his nephew. His attention pulled to the woman his sister had grown to be.

“Julie, right?” You spoke gently tugging Ben closer to you, “Can I help you?”

“Yeah.” Julie nodded, mumbled a thank you as you welcomed the girl into the small home you had made. It was small but perfect, “Did he get stitches?”

“Oh yeah! I guess you were there when he got hurt.” You nodded, moving a book from the couch for Julie to sit down. Your attention was on Ben as he went to the corner to play with toys, “He did. He’s kinda like my brother and his dad in that way.”

“Oh, god.” The overly familiar voice snapped your attention.

Sitting on either side of Julie were exact replicas of three boys that tragically died back in 1995, everyone froze. Even Ben looked up from the tension.

“Mama?” Ben asked, furrowing his brow.

“It’s okay Ben. Can you go to your room?” You asked, staring pale at the two people that you hadn’t noticed before. They hadn’t been visible to you at the time until they sat beside Julie. The scampering of feet and the gentle closing a door left you alone with four people.

“She can see us.”

Mutely you nodded at Alex’s statement slouching into the couch in shock, “What is happening?”

“I found a CD in my garage, and I played it. Out of nowhere, Luke, Reggie and Alex literally appeared in the room. They’re ghosts.” Julie spoke softly, “I’m not sure how I can see them, but I can.”

“Wow.” You breathed leaning back into the couch, unable to tear your gaze from the three boys, “Let me guess. Your first order of business was haunting the hell out of Bobby?”

Bobby, Trevor as the world knew, had lived up to your predictions of him being a lowlife rat boy. If you didn’t have Ben, you would have gone after him, but you couldn’t risk what little you had at the time.

“He stole our songs,” Luke grumbled crossing his arms so like you remember from years ago. He was still the passionate, caring musician you fell in love with so quickly.

“I know. I tried everything but with Ben…it was too hard, but hey he’s gotten little success from his new stuff. Guess he didn’t think of how stealing songs wouldn’t pan out.” You shrugged, twisting a ring on your finger that Luke gave you a few weeks after the spontaneous proposal.

“So Ben?” Alex questioned, leaning forward to rest his arms on his knees with great interest in the new topic.

The tsunami of happiness broke through the heavy fog of sadness when your favourite subject came around. Talking about Ben could go on for years you swore with the amount of love for him.

“His name is Benjamin Lucas Patterson. He’s eight years old and obsessed with music, they say playing classical music helps with mental intelligence. Still, he wouldn’t settle unless I played rock.” You laughed glancing over your shoulder at the closed door, “He adores Bear in the Big Blue House and Dragon Tales. Not fond of Barney or Sesame Street but he’ll still watch it.”

The guys ate it up listening to every detail of a little boy they missed even if they only recently learnt about him. Reggie was silent listening to your stories of the young boy.

“His prized possession…come with me.” You gestured turning to head to the bedroom, “I didn’t ask for a lot of baby stuff, just the essentials and anything someone could make. Sunset Curve. You guys were significant to us, so I wanted Ben to have that.”

Ben was settled playing with the cars by his toy chest barely glancing as four people came together. Julie decided to stay in the living room. With a hand, you grabbed the blanket Ben absolutely always needed. It was a homemade blanket made entirely out of clothing—one of Reggie’s flannels, a few shirts from concerts with Luke and clothing that Alex loved.

“Y/N,” Alex spoke, brushing his fingers over the worn material touched at the action of doing something so little yet powerful.

“I’m going, to be frank. After you died and I went to your fun-“ the word choked you as if you were back in 1995 sitting beside your mother wearing that black dress; a dress you burnt in the bathroom tub, “Mom found the test in my room. Rookie mistake. They weren’t thrilled about the baby and who the father was.”

“They kicked you out?”

“And Luke’s parents immediately welcomed me into their home. I owe them a lot, and Emily made this for Ben, she may not have approved of the band, but she knew it was important, so she wanted Ben to have a piece of his father’s greatest joy.”

“Mama? Can we have burgers tonight?” Ben asked quietly from his toys, “Can they stay for supper?”

Ben was shy with new people, but once he got to know someone, he was just like Luke with his bubbly and passionate personality. He was the spitting image of Luke with his hair and eye colour, but he got your nose and skin colour.

“If they want to.” You smiled, reaching over to pull the eight-year-old into your arms only wanting him to never grow up.

Alex, needing a break from the grief, wandered to a picture hanging on the wall that was a shadow box with his very first drum sticks. Underneath was Reggie’s old necklace that had to be replaced. Lastly underneath was the very first pick Luke used for the first song the band had performed.

“I’m Ben.” The boy spoke, meeting the eyes of the newcomers, “You’re the band that passed away, right?”

“Yeah. This may be confusing but Ben this is Alex, Reggie and Luke.” You replied, brushing his bangs away from his eyes. Ben returned to his quiet nature before looking at your eyes.

“That’s my family, right?”

In perfect sync, Alex and Luke started silently crying at the little boy’s words wishing that that night had never happened. It seemed at the time the right way to start the new chapter with one last street dog.

“Yeah, baby.” You cleared your throat nodding along to the innocent words your son spoke before he was wandering out of the room, “One hour of cartoons young man.”

“I’m gonna go.” Reggie spoke gesturing after the boy, “I wanna watch Cartoons.”

Reggie poofed out of the room following the little boy out of the room, leaving three sad people. The room was heavy in loss, so sad it could choke a person.

“Does Mom and Dad have anything to do with him?” Alex asked as the boys covered their grief by wandering around the bedroom. Taking in the pictures of Ben from throughout the eight years, some with you or with his paternal grandparents. Few had Alex and your parents.

“They moved a few months after you died.” You admitted, “After the way they reacted to Ben I didn’t want him in that environment. We get Christmas cards and calls on his birthday, but I don’t have the time to travel.”

Alex nodded vividly remembering the way they reacted after he had told his parents that he didn’t like girls. It was challenging since Dad was always excited for the family name to be passed down, he didn’t see that the name could continue no matter who Alex loved. Mom was more open but stepped in line with her husband instead of her hurting son.

“I’m sorry.” Luke blurted stepping closer to you, allowing you to see the ocean of tears and pain swimming in his tortured gaze, “I shouldn’t have gotten that street dog. I should have stayed with you, you weren’t feeling good.”

“Things happen for a reason, Luke.” You sadly reminded the boy, “I wish it didn’t happen, but it did, and I’ve learned to live with that. Ben has a wonderful family and a good life.”

“He knows about us too,” Luke spoke, thinking back to barely half an hour ago when Ben acted as if he knew Luke all his life. God, Luke wished he could have seen everything.

“I have videos of Ben if you want to see them.” You offered the boy, “There’s a television in the den where Ben has his baby book, and the home videos if you want. You can stay in there all you want.”

Luke nodded, playing with his fingers, “I’d love that.”

“If you want to be alone, I can take Ben for ice cream. You can have the whole house to watch alone.” You graciously offered the boy you would always love and believed before that you would see him in decades after your own death.

Luke silently nodded following as you took him to the den where it had a child-sized guitar and floor to ceiling bookshelves. A television was tucked in the corner with a video camera stored on a shelf with a VHS player. In a sealed container, the home videos were kept safe along with the baby books.

“I’ll be back in a few hours. It’s nice to see you, Luke. Really.” You told the now younger boy keeping his eyes on the opened bucket. A bucket that held all the firsts he had missed out on a little boy he had loved since first seeing him in his family home weeks ago.

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tendercoretroglodyke · 4 years ago

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... I’m interested in legitimately gay Reese (I assume one piece of evidence is “look at what they’re doing and tell me you’re not gay”)

okay this is like 2 days late but this is why reese malcolminthemiddle is legitimately gay:

(side note: did anyone need a queer media thesis paper or something... I am willing to share lmao)

so none of this is like... rock solid evidence or anything but I need to believe at least one main character of a show is gay and/or trans to maintain interest and reese is the most plausible gay character. also it’s early 2000′s so he just gets a lot of vaguely homophobic jokes lmao

first of all, yes, the biggest piece of evidence he’s gay is those lines from that episode I quoted the other day--thinking malcolm is gay, he tries to show his support by giving him a gay porno: “’Naught Pool Boys 3!’ I watched 10 or 12 of these, and this one seems to have the most stuff you guys like.” and when malcolm says he isn’t gay, reese responds “Malcolm. Check out what those guys are doing in that movie, and THEN tell me you’re not gay.”-- so, 1) reese sat down and watched like a dozen gay porn movies to ““find a good one for his gay brother”” and 2) he thinks malcolm would reconsider his heterosexuality if he watched what was in that movie, implying that HE reconsidered his sexuality after watching that movie, or at the very least found it hot

in the same episode, the character tricking malcolm into thinking reese is gay lists the following as evidence: he obsesses over his hair and his looks, loves his gourmet cooking, has a bunch of magazines covered in comically muscular men, and that he’s angry and acts like a jerk because he’s “dealing with something weird and confusing.” now obviously, the obsession with hair/looks can be chalked up to the fact that he’s a teenage boy, and there’s nothing inherently gay about enjoying cooking. the dozen magazines of muscle-bound men could certainly be taken as gay evidence, though, and it IS established in the show that his entire bully persona is his way of masking his inner feelings and insecurities. there’s literally a whole episode where he & malcolm realize they have no friends because they act like little shits to push people away because they’re afraid of rejection and/or abandonment from their peers. they ostracize themselves before they can be ostracized by the other students at school. I could probably write a whole other essay on reese’s psyche tbqh lmao there’s a shocking amount there!!

of the brothers who are actually old enough to be attracted to girls (reese, malcolm, and francis), he shows the least interest. now bear with me here. you might be thinking, “well, yeah, it’s malcolm’s show, we’re not gonna see things from other people’s perspective!” but that is actually surprisingly untrue, the show is very much equally shown from each family members’ perspectives. starting about s2, when malcolm is in early middle school, he starts getting crushes on girls and pursuing them. francis goes after a few women in the first couple seasons and then marries a woman we see a lot throughout the show.

in the roughly... 130?? episodes I have watched so far, nearly all of reese’s “interest” in girls involve either: competition with malcolm, genuinely just liking her as a friend, or some completely ulterior motive. the only exception to this I can think of is in the early seasons where he has a crush on a cheerleader and tries to get on her good side by joining the cheerleading squad, which the writers clearly set up as a way to make gay jokes about reese. let me give you a few examples of his relationships with girls

the first relationship we see him in is with a “stupid girl” that malcolm tried (and failed) to date, and the main reason they get together is that they think on the same wavelength and genuinely seem to enjoy hanging out. they take breaks from their bro chats to make out every once in a while. eventually he gets her to break up with him because he doesn’t want to go to the school dance with her (he doesn’t want to go at all). years later, he’s dating some girl we meet for like 5 minutes, before he goes to confess to her that she’s the first girl he’s ever loved. she then breaks up with him. he’s sad, but taking it fairly well. he’s about to leave when he sees malcolm hiding under the bed, and learns that he stole his girlfriend. he then runs away to join the army. he was clearly MUCH more upset that his brother stole his girlfriend than he was that his girlfriend broke up with him. there are many more instances of him and malcolm competing for a girl’s affections, and he seems mostly motivated by the competition itself.

in addition to “stupid girl,” he also manufactures an “attraction” to his female army buddy in the last season. the premise of this episode is that his old army buddy (a girl he play-wrestles with and insults like he would his own brothers) comes to visit him, and malcolm convinces reese that she’s attracted to him, and that reese’s nervousness at learning that fact is proof he’s in love with her. there’s a misunderstanding where reese asks her if she has certain “feelings” and she says she does, but what she ACTUALLY means is that she has a crush on reese’s MOM. she’s a lesbian. reese later propositions her (saying he’s saved his virginity for this--he’s probably about 18 here), and when she says omg no im gay, he is HUGELY relieved they can go back to being friends. CLASSIC mlm/wlw friendship moment.

there’s an episode where these cute girls pick up reese (& nerds) to kiss in front of their boyfriends to make them jealous. reese is all for it, and when malcolm argues that it’s not worth his dignity and the beating he’ll get from the girl’s boyfriend, reese counters that that’s WHY he wants to do this--he’s completely invisible at school, and thinks getting beaten up for kissing some guy’s girlfriend will at least make him known around school. at no point does he indicate he’s actually attracted to this girl, and when it comes time to kiss her, he finds the weakest excuse to run away at the last minute.

im not gonna list all of these but there’s more lmao

the following is a random assortment of one-off gay jokes and out-of-context lines with gay reese implications, often homophobically bc its early 2000′s writing:

says “I’m gay” to a girl to give malcolm a better shot at her

(again in competition with malcolm) tries to flirt with a girl by spraying milk in her face as the punchline to a joke, which is. well. hm. self-sabotaging, to say the least!!

Reese: “Do you think it’s right to totally change who you are and turn your back on EVERYTHING you believe in, just to impress a hot guy??” [his dad gives a long, blank stare, before asking:] “...Burt Reynolds hot, or Sting hot?”

“YEAH I like clouds! I call them sky kittens :)” (I just think that one’s sweet!)

“Look, Christie, here’s the thing. When I first met you, I was just messing around. But we’ve gotten so close that, now... I really like you! I can’t keep this up anymore. I’m not the person you think I am. I’ve been pretending since the day I met you. It’s so hard having to constantly cover my tracks to keep my story straight... and I don’t WANT to anymore! I’m tired of living this lie! I’m done with it. I’m sorry.”

he catfishes some guy to blackmail him, but is implied to continue the flirtation even after the catfishing/blackmail is revealed

reese is, technically, married to a man. this particular plot point is played as a joke and manages to be both racist and homophobic, so I won’t go into it. but I believe he is still married to that man. technically.

reese takes care of a huge box full of caterpillars until they pupate and become beautiful butterflies. I feel like there’s some kind of gay coming out metaphor here somewhere.

I think there are a couple other times where he comments on a guy’s attractiveness but I couldn’t find specific instances.

In conclusion: Reese is a deeply repressed gay kid who was socialized SO thoroughly as an early 2000′s straight boy that, despite his attraction for men and his obvious compulsory heterosexuality, he still cannot admit to himself that he is gay even as he enters adulthood. Furthermore, his subconscious frustration about this fact is turned outward to form the “schoolyard bully” costume he uses to mask his insecurities and keep others from getting too close to him.

Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk. I could be convinced to come back for another talk about how Dewey is trans or about how each and every member of that family is neurodivergent in entirely different ways. Assuming anyone has read this far in the first place!!

#sorry this was so long lmao I legit spent 2 hours on this #I have 2 modes: not doing the thing and overdoing the thing #hey anon if you actually see this I'd appreciate a quick message saying so lmao I'd hate to write all this only for you to miss it #I'll probably rb sometime tomorrow at least #also liz if you're reading this i was GONNA add a bit about francis' gay potential like you mentioned but I ran out of steam so remind me t #i think reese has the most gay potential tho #mitm #malcolm in the middle #anonymous #Anonymous

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caranfindel · 4 years ago

Text

Take these broken wings and learn to fly (15.20 coda)

het, but Wincest-compatible | about 2300 words | PG-13 for language | characters: sam winchester, sam’s blurry wife |

Julia has been widowed (God, what an awful word, widowed) for three years when she meets Sam. It’s a work-based friendship at first. She’s kind of lonely and sad, he’s kind of lonely and sad, and they gravitate toward each other. And then one evening they’re at a bar, the last ones left from an after-work happy hour, both of them drinking more than they should, and she thinks he’s kind and thoughtful and smart and he may be 10 years older than me but he’s still hot as hell and I enjoy being with him and I look forward to seeing him and maybe I should just… and she kisses him. He’s shocked; shocked enough to confirm that he wasn’t just hanging around hoping to make it out of the friendzone. And then he’s holding her face in his hands and he’s kissing her too.

It’s good. They’re good together. It’s not the earth-shattering, all-encompassing romance she had with Shaun. Julia knows she’ll never have anything like that again. Most people don’t even get one soulmate in their lives; no one gets two. And she knows Sam doesn’t have that same desperate love that Shaun had for her; she knows she’ll never have his whole heart. (She knows the woman he intended to marry was killed in a fire, she knows another woman he loved went back to her ex. She doesn’t know which of these women still owns that last piece of Sam’s heart.) But she loves Sam, and he loves her, and they get married.

(The sex is amazing. Sometimes he’s gentle, almost reverent, as if he’s afraid he’ll break her, and other times he’s fierce and passionate and almost tries to break her, and she loves both ends of the spectrum.)

She suggests they melt down her old wedding band to make a new one. It was an heirloom from her grandmother, a plain wide band of yellow gold that she loves, that she thought she’d wear for the rest of her life. But Shaun is the one who put it on her finger the first time. It doesn’t seem right to ask Sam to accept it now. A new band from the old gold seems like a good compromise. No, Sam says, I couldn’t ask you to do that. I know a way we can make it ours. He has the inside of the band engraved with the same symbol he wears tattooed over his heart, and makes her promise to never take it off. Bad luck, he says.

He’s such a contradiction. Scary smart, but as superstitious as an Appalachian grandmother. Calm and unflappable, but with a weirdly hyperactive startle reflex. Kind and empathetic, but capable of extreme violence when pushed to his limits (seriously, don’t walk your drunk ass up to Sam Winchester’s wife and lay hands on her, and don’t get mouthy when she tells you to back off) and just really, frighteningly skilled at that violence.

(A little frightening and also very sexy. Julia’s always had a thing for the hero type.)

They both have nightmares. One night Julia watches Shaun’s face melting under his gear and wakes with a cry of horror. Sam holds her as she tearfully describes living on the knife edge of constant fear that comes with loving someone whose job is literally running into burning buildings. I know, he says, over and over, even though he can’t possibly know. The irony of their first loves both dying in flames is not lost on her, but it’s not like his college girlfriend was a firefighter. It’s not like he watched her go to work every day and prayed she’d make it home alive.

Julia’s pregnancy is a wonderful surprise. She and Shaun had tried for over a year before she was widowed, and she just didn’t count on it happening with Sam. They agree not to name the baby after anyone they’ve lost. Let’s not name him after our pain, she says, and Sam is okay with that. (Or he isn’t. But ever since she showed him the positive pregnancy test, she’s known she could ask him for anything. She’s known he would rip out his heart and serve it on a platter if she asked for it.)

But they haven’t decided on a name yet when her water breaks four weeks early. When their perfect baby boy is born at 12:10 a.m., the nurse announces the date and time and Sam looks up at her in shock and blinks away happy tears and says it’s the 24th. It’s my brother’s birthday. Julia is flying high on endorphins; she loves this baby and she loves this man and she even loves his dead brother she never got to meet, and she says it’s got to be a sign; let’s name him Dean.

She takes off her wedding ring, just this once, to have Dean’s birthdate engraved on the inside. Sam does the same with his own ring. He insists they go to a jeweler who will engrave while they wait, rather than leaving the rings there. She waves a hand at her lumpy postpartum body. You afraid someone’s gonna make a move on all this if you don’t keep a ring on it?

He laughs at her and says you’re onto me, even though he’s the one who needs to be locked away, still with that long lean runner’s body and the amazing shoulders and the goddamn dimples. I just don’t like us being without them, he says. He is a sweet, sentimental fool and she adores him. He bends down to kiss her, carefully maneuvering the baby he’s wearing in a sling, and Julia looks at this man and this baby and this life she didn’t think she was get to have and knows she’s happier than she has any right to be. And she’s relieved when Sam slips the ring back onto her finger, this ring imbued with the men she loves, so maybe he’s not the only sentimental fool.

(One thing she loves about Sam is that he understands why she feels guilty that Shaun didn’t get to share this life with her.)

In July they light a little candle for Dean’s six-month birthday. When Julia wakes the next morning, Sam’s side of the bed is empty and cold. She finds him cuddling their sleeping baby in the living room. I got up to give him a bottle, Sam says. I guess I just fell asleep out here. His red-rimmed eyes and empty coffee mug suggest he didn’t actually sleep at all, but, well. They’re both battling their own private demons. If a night cradling the baby gives Sam some peace for whatever reason, she’s glad of it.

Sam’s fierce love for their child takes her by surprise. If Julia has 90% of his heart, his son has 110%. He parents with a vengeance, is the only way she can think of to describe it. Like he’s making up for something. She doesn’t feel slighted, but it’s impossible to ignore that ever since Dean was born, Sam’s prime objective has been to make sure the boy is happy and safe. Everything else comes second.

(When she notices Sam has been carefully marking his tattoo symbol onto Dean’s clothing, hidden near seams and always in a color that almost matches the fabric, she decides not to say anything. He gets a little funny about his superstitions sometimes.)

Sam desperately wants Dean to have a sibling, and they try for another one, but it doesn’t happen. Julia reminds him that they’re lucky to have even one child. That having a sibling is not a lifetime guarantee of companionship and love. She should know, after all, since Stephanie cut her off after she married that asshole Scientologist and decided she couldn’t have a relationship with anyone who wasn’t also in their stupid cult.

Dean has plenty of friends and tons of activities, which Sam encourages with an almost religious fervor, but he never pulls away from his parents. They have so much in common, Sam and his son. Instead of rebelling as a teenager, Dean seems to grow even closer to his father. They spend hours together, paging through the ancient books in Sam’s study (she hates them, they smell musty and make her sneeze) or driving in the old Chevrolet. They even travel together sometimes, visiting those friends of Sam’s that live up north somewhere. Julia met them at the wedding and they were perfectly nice, thrilled to death that she and Sam had found each other. But she always feels like an outsider when they’re around, like they’re part of something she’ll never understand. So much history, with Sam and the brother she never got to meet. They absolutely dote on Dean though, and he seems to love them too, so the boys’ trip to Sioux Falls becomes an annual event.

(Dean is 14 years old when he comes home from one of these trips with his own version of the tattoo.)

When Julia is diagnosed with cancer, Dean is 16 years old. Sam does his best to ensure life goes on as normal for their son but somehow never neglects Julia’s needs. He throws himself into research and is always on top of the latest treatment, always at her elbow with the top internet-recommended remedy for her side effects, making sure both she and Dean have everything they want and need, all the attention and support they can tolerate. She doesn’t know when, or if, Sam actually sleeps. When she feels up for it, he arranges experiences for the three of them. A week lying on the beach, a weekend in New York City, a night in the mountains looking at the stars. When we look back on this time, he says, I don’t want us to only remember how much it sucked. I want us all to have good memories too.

(She doesn’t know why he’s concerned about her memories. There’s a good chance she won’t have much time to enjoy them. But it’s good for Dean. She doesn’t want this to ruin Dean’s childhood.)

Sam insists Dean go away to college as planned. Julia agrees, although she’s kind of surprised he’s willing to let the boy out of his sight. Aren’t you going to miss him? she asks.

So much, he answers. But this isn’t about me, and what I need. It’s about him. They drive Dean to school in the ancient Chevrolet. Supposedly because the trunk has room for all of his stuff, but Julia is pretty sure it’s just one last sentimental road trip in the old thing before Sam retires it. When they pick Dean up at the end of the school year, it’s in her SUV. Dean promises his father, more than once, that he’ll restore the Chevy someday.

Five years after Julia’s diagnosis, she’s sitting in the doctor’s office learning that her last remission was her last remission. There are no more options. She has months, not years. Sam clutches her hand and nods, once, as if to say I should have known this would happen; I should have expected something like this. Then he takes her home.

It’s a blessing in a way, he says late that night, after a little too much to drink. Knowing what’s coming. Having time to say goodbye. You don’t always get that. And yes, she knows this as well as anybody does.

Sam has always been supportive of her choice not to contact Stephanie, but one day he says Jules, I promise I’ll never bring it up again. It’s just that I don’t want you to have any regrets. I don’t want you miss the opportunity to say things that you’ll wish you’d said. Julia isn’t sure Steph will speak to her. She’s not even sure she’ll have the same phone number — they haven’t spoken since Dad’s funeral, a year after she was widowed — but she makes the call. And Steph answers. And cries. And comes to visit, where she hugs and cries some more. Sam watches it all with a sad smile for a while, then disappears into the garage to sit in the old Chevy.

When Julia takes her last conscious breaths, Dean is holding one hand and Sam is holding the other. She squeezes her son’s hand and thinks I love you, dear boy, and I’m sorry I have to leave you. She squeezes her husband’s hand and thinks thank you for giving me this, thank you for taking care of me, thank you for loving me and letting me love you. Then she closes her eyes and lets the soft, warm darkness take over.

And then. Then she wakes to a cool breeze and the sound of chirping birds. She’s standing at a lake she recognizes. It’s Shaun’s favorite fishing spot. And Shaun is there, waiting for her. And everything is okay.

Sam does show up eventually. Julia’s sitting on the porch of the cabin with Shaun, enjoying the perpetual nice day (sometimes a spring morning, sometimes a fall afternoon, but always nice) when she hears the familiar rumble. It cant be, she thinks. It can’t be that old car. But it is.

I’m glad you found someone with good taste in cars, Shaun says, as Sam unfolds himself from the driver’s seat. He looks exactly as he did the day she met him; no glasses, only a little grey at his temples. Still tall and strong and beautiful. She runs to meet him and embraces him as Shaun watches from the porch.

You found Shaun, Sam says. I’m so happy for you, Jules. I really am. He doesn’t seem to have any intention of joining her (their) Heaven permanently, but he doesn’t seem to have anyone else with him either. Where is the dead girlfriend? How is this fair?

They talk about Dean, and Julia’s heart swells with pride over her strong, smart, kind, brave son. He’s like you, she says. He’s just like you.

Sam shrugs. He’s a Winchester.

But what about you? she says. You’re not — you’re not alone here, are you?

Nah, he says. I’m good. I promise.

(Eventually Julia meets the first Dean, and she understands.)

===

I know a lot of people have mocked Sam's blurry wife, but I actually have grown to love the concept. Because it means she can be anything we want her to be. And yeah, initially I liked the idea of her being Dr. Cara, or Eileen. But now I don't think that would happen. I think Sam would have to start fresh to have that kind of relationship. And I also like the idea of Sam's wife having her own soulmate somewhere, waiting for her, so she's not a huge part of Sam and Dean's shared Heaven. I mean, they're gonna visit, obviously. And then they'll go home to their soulmates.

The title is from "Blackbird" by the Beatles.

#spn #15.20 #my fic #episode coda #sam winchester

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clubtuan · 4 years ago

Text

Sorry, I couldn’t get to you

Pairing: Do Kyungsoo x female reader

Genre: The chilling adventure of Sabrina!au /witch!au /ansgt a lot of it/ mention of Swing Kids/ fluff / suggestive

Prompt : « I make my own happiness, and I hope you can too » - Sabrina Morningstar

A/N: I finish CAOS and I miss Kyungsoo. And I have Roh Kisoo feelings so yeah this happened, my first scenarios with EXO. And I totally wrote this listening to ‘’Say Something’’ by A Great Big World 90% of the time.

Word count : 5k

Rain was heavily falling that night, and your familiar, a black cat sitting next to you purring. Life as 24 year old witch in Seoul, but still a single 24 year old, life wasn’t that boring it was just that people were always asking you to introduce them to your boyfriend.. Hell who needs a boyfriend when their cousin is the king of Hell, or when your family is the known as the most powerful witches in this damn country ?

The smoke of your tea was long gone as the liquid turned cold, but a burnt smell came to your nostrils .. Park Chanyeol, the king of the under and your cousin.

‘’Hello cousin.

For the love of Satan, Chanyeol!’’ He laughed and take the place right next to you, taking off his crown. ‘’Hell is hella boring without you’’ he sighed.

The only thing you wanted to answer him was how earth was also a boring playground without him, and how Junmyeon wasn’t helping cause he probably was busy running the Academy of Unseen Arts.

You sighed, humans weren’t funny, working wasn’t funny, and plus your feet hurt, from working in Minseok’s small cafe. ‘’You’re a real drama queen Y/N’’ Said Chanyeol before readjusting his black oversized opened dress shirt. ‘’Go to a club, find a cute or bad boy looking guy and have some fun’’ He said picking up his bloody crown.

You couldn’t believe it, even your cousin was asking you to get .. well for the moment a one night stand, but still asking you to find a ‘someone’ ..

‘’Uh and before I forget honey, you may be a witch but black isn’t our only option here’ He disappeared before you could kill him or throw a pillow to his face.’’ -Unbelievable, was all you said after his exit.

You scanned your shelves full of spell books, ‘dark magic : a witchy way with demons’, other books about demons and others creatures you had to deal with, a big brown book caught your eyes and you smirk taking it in your hands. ‘’Boyfriend, here we meet’’ your cat meow looking at you ‘’I know buddy, but everyone says I should have someone so ..’’

To be real witches and wizards are known to have sex demons, and huge sexual orgies from time to time .. seriously what is the problem with witches and sex ?

Oh yeah Lilith was !

You find yourself in the bathroom that night, sculpting your future boyfriend in the wax of a few red candles. abs ? Check ! Cute looking butt ? Check ! Good look ? Check. Nice ?Also check !

‘’Let the doll sit in hot water for one to two days and your lover will be yours’’ you read out of the book.

The bathtub was full and ready, and your were casting the spell asking yourself the hell you were doing.

You clearly fell asleep, waiting to your full tub to see if anything would change .. but nope nothing really changed except the size of the wax doll, which was now a lot larger and not much looking like wax. Work was starting for another few hours but someone was ringing at your door at 9am. And the same someone didn’t wait for you to entered your apartment.

‘’Y/N? We know you’re here, the cat told us.’’ Aunties !

You exited your bathroom closing your door, they didn’t need to see your future love spell laying in hot water with rose petals !

‘’Aunties hi!’’ They both looked at you as if you were insane, well you totally looked like at the moment, your oversized black shirt, and dried mascara under your eyes !

‘’What are you doing ?’’

I’m creating my own boyfriend, cause people I work with, or I’m friend with ask me about my love life 24/7 .. nah you shouldn’t say that to your aunts or else they’ll kill you ..

‘’Nothing Aunt Zee ! I just need coffee cause I .. I .. Yeah coffee !’’

Both of your aunts looked at each other, but not in the suspicious way you tried to avoid, thanks Dark Lord ! ‘’Your cousin, ..’’ Aunt H started but you clearly were not listening to them. Looking at you bathroom door asking yourself a lot of question, does he has a name or you had to give him one ?

‘’Aunties, if you create someone out of .. never mind’’ you stopped yourself, they didn’t need to suspect you and your future « man »?

And the fact you wanted them out of here .. fast ! No need for them to see a stranger getting out of one of your rooms probably naked and confused !

You were bored to wait for anything to happen, and plus you received a text.

JUNMYEON:

You small witch, don’t forget about the Coven party in 2 days.

If you’re not here, I’ll kill u under the full moon babe xox

What a best friend ! You once again totally forgot about this little Coven thing at Minseok cafe he was hosting with Baekhyun.

Witches parties were always too much, even more if Byun Baekhyun was the one throwing the said party. Going back to the 50s (like literally), ghosts ..

To be honest you wanted your Saturday night to be a rerun of « Sabrina, the teenage witch » under a plaid on your couch with pizza, beer and tteokbokki, not a extravagant party with all your Coven.

BAEKHYUNIE:

Get ready for the night of your witchy spicy life, cause your god fairy mother (me!!)

got some friend who are single & ready to mingle !

YOU:

Baek, no more weird goblin or any magical creatures !

Plus you are late I’ve a date !

His only response was a few shocked emojis, and a few seconds later another text : I’m behind your door with food !

But Baekhyun, being Baekhyun he didn’t ring the bell and come into your home with a huge goofy smile on his lips.

‘’Don’t look at me like that, I’ve got your fav’’

Why everybody was coming to visit you today ? Normally your apartment was cozy and calm .. but not today ! For Satan’s love !

Baekhyun was one of your closest friend, but also a dark fairy and Chanyeol’s right arm.

And fairies loves to party way too much, it was in their personality ! But the cutest thing was his pointy ears.

‘’ So, my lil friend got herself a date ?’’

And fairy were all about gossips! You simply smiled and nodded at your friend. No need to say too much !

‘’Sooo ..’’ You tried to start another conversation ‘’ How is hell today ?’’

He lifted one of his eyebrow ‘’ Yeol was here last night, don’t try to escape my questions woman’’

Maybe you should have stuff your mouth with rice and onions !

Your fairy friend talked and talked, asking you a few questions about your date for the party. You nodded and made a few ‘’oh!’’ ‘’mhmm’’ but must importantly you were eating and trying to avoid his questions.

Until that one moment when Baekhyun suddenly stopped talking, and was looking behind you his mouth wide open.

‘’Sorry babe, I was a bit long’’

Babe ? You turned in your sit and your eyes dropped to a towel, one of your black towel hanging low on some hips, well defined hips to say, and as your eyes were going up to see who that was, you followed a happy trail, your mouth watered at the sight, happy trail being one of your weakness in a man. After his define stomach and sun kissed glowing skin. His heart shaped lips looked so kissable and full, his dark eyes hided behind tick black frame of glasses. God he was beautiful, more than that to be honest, his voice sounded like honey to your ears, his cute hand slowly scratching the back of his head. You watched a few drop of water running on his chest.

Next you saw a lot of beauty marks on his naked skin, a galaxy of beauty marks. The man got you hypnotized with one sentence, this spell was something !

‘’Hey, you must be Baekhyun ! Y/N told me about you’’ you were drinking his every words just like Baekhyun was. ‘’I’m Do Kyungsoo’’

Dark lord even his name sounded so heavenly (damn for a dark lord follower, you think a lot about heaven right now), after his introduction he excused himself to get dress.

‘’Is this your date ?’’ Murmured Baekhyun with too much excitement ‘’Damn girl you just hit the lotto !’’

Your first few days with Kyungsoo was surprisingly good, he already known a lot about you. Because to created him you dropped some drops of blood in the potion.

You asked silly questions to Kyungsoo, just to get to know him better: ‘’Bubble tea or Iced coffee ?’’ sure he was your creation but he still has his own personality. Your afternoon been filled with laughs, his hand in your hair, under your shirt, and finally you naked on top of him. His hands on your hips left some marks just like his plump lips and teeth drew love bites on your collarbone and others behind your ear. Your long black nails left marks on his back from the pleasure .. hell this man gonna be the end of your sanity !

‘’I’m glad you bring me to life’’ his arm was wrapped around your waist, and his lips continued their way in the back on your neck. You never expect anything with this incantation, you never expect the perfect man to came to life in your bathtub but here you were laying under your sheet naked, with Kyungsoo showing his love to you. Drawing abstract shapes on your skin, following your own moles creating a galaxy with his fingers.

Your friends and family were totally shocked to see him next to you, the Saturday night at the Coven party.

Even your aunt fell under his spell, and Chanyeol almost gave him his throne. Kyungsoo always had an answer to every questions about your relationship, his hand never left your side that night, or you find his lips on your cheek every other times.

Do Kyungsoo might be the result of your spell, but you totally were under his.

Days with Kyungsoo were sweet, full of adventures and funny. Sex was insanely good, (yes might be a witch thing but thanks Lilith) the feeling of his hand tracing your body, or even his lips on your skin. Or just his eyes on you were making you feel like the most wanted woman on the earth, Kyungsoo has his ways.

His moles were your favorite thing to kiss after his pillowy lips, but the must was the little mole on his top lip. And for Kyungsoo his lips found their home right under your breast, on ink saying ‘Witch’ he always said your tattoo was full of sarcasm.

Were you suppose to fall to your own creation ?

Your cat was laying on your bed, his head in Kyungsoo’s hand as his was caressing him. You watched him laying underneath your sheet, his chest on full display as your bedding was on his hips hiding a bit of his nakedness. ‘’You know I think he quite like you’’ you said to him ‘’Yeah he is purring, and I like him too .. he is like a part of you’’

You smiled looking at them, the sun was hitting Kyungsoo’s skin in all the right place making you craving him again, on the spot. His skin against yours, his finger interlaced with yours, his low groans .. he was hotter than hell.

Your black familiar exited the room as soon as you found a place on your mattress. ‘’You look cute with my shirt on’’ his hands traveled under the cotton of the shirt, tracing the shape of your chest. He smelled so nice just like lavender and woodland (a/n: if you ever smelled ‘autumn night’ by yankee candle this is the smell I’m talking about), everything about him was comforting, cozy and making you feel somehow safe. His lips right underneath your left ear, his right hand playing with the side of your black laced panty.

He was addicting just like a drug, now he was in your life you couldn’t imagine not having him anymore. Kyungsoo became a part of you, like a missing piece of puzzle and thanks to magic you finally completed the puzzle.

The way he made you feel was crazy, almost too crazy to be real. His breath hitting your neck made you moan even more than his hands running your body, and his length hitting every spots.

Days were brighter than before, spring was almost there cherry blossom were about to bloom, just like you now. And the night getting warmer but for once your bed felt empty and kind of cold without the raven haired boy sleeping next to you.

‘’Y/N ! ARE YOU ISANE ????’’

You woke up to Chanyeol screaming and tearing off his black hair. ‘’Yeol it’s 3 am, the fuck you want now ?’’ You asked, ready to kill him.

‘’Do Kyungsoo ? Huh ?? More like Roh Kisoo ! I can’t believe you invoke a freaking ghost to pretend to be your fucking fuck buddy’’

What ? A ghost ? Fuck buddy ? You were lost, totally lost and you cousin still panicked in front of your bed. ‘’ A ghost, what ? Who’s a ghost ?’’ He sighed loudly. ‘’Cousin, the aunties will legit kill you’’

Your only question was ‘who the fuck is Roh Kisoo ?’ He sighed once again before showing a beige folder (there’s folder in hell ? Anyway that is not the question)

‘’Cousin, he is dead, Do Kyungsoo isn’t real his name was Roh Kisoo, North Korean soldier. He used to tap dance, he was killed because he was about to kill an American soldier on stage’’

You couldn’t believe what Chanyeol was telling you .. you did not invoke a dead soldier, you created him out of wax. ‘’Chanyeol .. I created him. I do not fuck with dead’’

He stopped all his talking to look at you, dead in the eyes (no joke here). Your knees were against your chest as you sit on your mattress, ‘’He lied to me’’ you said softly. Your eyes filled with tears, you couldn’t believe you fell in love with your creation but he seemed so human, probably too human you were now thinking .. cause he been alive once.

Chanyeol wrapped his arms around you, even the king of hell could not bear to see his cousin and best friend crying. ‘’Love, do-does his heart beat ?’’ You looked up at him not really understanding why would it change if his heart was beating or not ? ‘’ If his heart beat, it means two things .. one he has feeling for you and second h-he .. he would become human, 100% human once again and believe his past life is just a dream .. Well his memories of the war and all being a dream’’

‘’And y/n..’’ He started again ‘’ you were in his past life .. his lover actually even if he never confessed or anything to you he loved you as Roh Kisoo .. that’s why he came to you as you created him’’

He put his hands on your eyes, and suddenly flashes of images, of him with shaved hair, kaki clothes, tap dancing, working on things, him stealing a kiss, stealing one of your kiss I the board of daylight, your death with two others persons you didn’t know and finally his own death.

The perk of being the king of hell was having ‘infos’ about people’s previous lives, and Chanyeol was shoving you Kyungsoo past life.

After your cousin exit, you didn’t sleep that night. You felt so small at the time watching the night lights by your window, thinking about everything that happened for the last two months of your life.. getting him, feeling happy and in love (a thing you never felt or lived before), how were you supposed to say all these things to Kyungsoo ?

Were you supposed to giving him up ? Send him back (yeah but were ?) ? Make him human ?

That morning Junmyeon made fun of you ‘looking like a panda’.

‘’ Y/N ?’’ He been calling your name for the last five minutes but your mind was anywhere but in Minseok’s cafe, jumping from memories to memories you created for the last 2 months.

The light was hitting your living room, a cup of coffee in your hand as you sit on your couch right next to Kyungsoo who was reading one your book. At the time everything felt right, as you were looking at him forgetting your cup in your hands, trying to find a single thing on him that was wrong .. but nothing was wrong.

‘’You know, I’ll not disappear love’’ you chuckled at his words, fearing that yes someday he’ll be gone.

His hand find it place on your knee, and his lips on your temple was comforting you and made you blush as a teenager.

At the time everything was simpler, you needed help .. but from who ?

You couldn’t bear to see Kyungsoo, not knowing how you’ll react in front of him, what to tell him, would you kiss him ? Let him make love to you ? Slap him ? Fall apart ? Break his heart ? (you didn’t know if his heart was beating .. if he was human or just the memory of his past life in wax)

YOU:

We need to talk aunties.

You were adult and you needed to face your mistakes, and you were finally doing it. The drive to your aunt’s was the longest it ever was and you felt heavy.

You spent a long time sitting in your car before entering the house, feeling a lot of shame, heartbroken, facing your mistake was harder than expected.

The second you saw your aunts you couldn’t keep your feelings together and start crying.

‘’ Chanyeol told us Y/N and even if your aunt wanted to scold you .. it’s not right to do now’’ started one of your aunt.

Aunt Zee was smoking but not saying anything, you knew she was disappointed. You felt totally out of place if you teleport yourself in a volcano you would to it right away.

‘’ I suppose Chanyeol explain you, the two options you have ?’’ Was Aunt Zee first worlds, you nodded.

‘’ If his heart beat or not, I could send him back or I can make him human.. ’’ your were stop by Aunt H ‘’ If you make him human, you know he’ll not remember you and what you both lived’’

Hearing that broke your heart even more, he couldn’t forget you if wasn’t right.

‘’ But he will kind of stay connected to you, as he has a part of you being your magic. So he is and will be a wizard.’’ Said your second aunt.

All you needed was time, a thing you didn’t have. One last time with him before choosing send him back or making him human and forget everything about you.

‘’But most important if his heart is beating, your trace will forever haunt him. Without him know why and who you are, love’’ said Aunt H, caressing your arm as comfort.

‘’ I can’t kill him’’

Yours aunties listened to you, telling them why and how to ‘created’ him, how happy he was making you, how human he seemed and now you knew why .. you told them everything, even wishing you had a last night with him.

Aunt Zee granted your wish, but tomorrow morning you had to say goodbye to love.

You never expected finding him dressed in his favorite black jumper and his ripped bleu jeans cooking in your kitchen with a glass full of white wine waiting for you next to his.

Your eyes filled with tears when his scent hit you, your head on his chest. ‘’ Let’s stay like this for a moment, please’’ you didn’t want him to see you like that.

The smile dancing on his lips broke you inside one more time, he looked so innocent in front of you, not knowing, almost like a child.

‘’You know babe, tonight there’s a shower of shooting stars let’s watch it’’ Yixing told him, even if he never met the Chinese wizard in real like they met on FaceTime, your friend was crazy when Baekhyun, once mentioned you had someone.

You simply nodded, even of shooting stars couldn’t help you this time.

The time moved so fast as if it was teasing you, your eyes never left Kyungsoo, too afraid to forgot him or to miss a beauty mark or the way his eyes were when he was smiling, looking at you.

Looking at him was the hardest thing you had ever done that night, you were giving up on him and you couldn’t say anything.

The view from the balcony of your appartement was incredible but the only thing you watched was him not the stars traveling the dark sky.

Even the moon seems ridiculous next to him, his glasses sat on his nose and his hair was a bit longer, his fringe hitting the frame of the glasses softly.

He turned his head to look at you, his hand caressed your cheek and his lips collided on yours, his kiss was full of passion, slow. Time stopped when his lips met yours, and you felt his heart pounded underneath your hand.

His heart was beating ..

‘’ .. I love you’’ His eyes were still closed and his lips still so closed to yours, and his thumb caressing your face.

Once again his lips crashed on yours, more intense this time. Yours hands holding the material of his jumper. ‘’Don’t ever forget about me’’ you whisper. His fingers slipped under the coton of your shirt, he pulled you even closer to him, as if no one else in the world existed. ‘’Never’’ you knew his answer was a lie but you needed it.

The time actually stopped at that moment the last time he made love to you, the stars and clouds were not moving and no sounds were heard, a spell to stop time was dangerous and only a powerful witch could to do but at the time it was your last priority.

It was the softest Kyungsoo ever showed you the way he loved you, he was taking his time with you that night as if he knew it was surely the last time. Looking at you his eyes were full of stars and his hands felt like velvet on your skin.

That night you refused to fall asleep, your head stayed on his chest listening to his heartbeat, his words playing over and over in your head, the way he confessed on that night was the hardest to accepted to you.

CHANYEOL:

I’m sorry cousin,

I tried to give a little bit more with him.

He make you happy I know.

You left your bed after reading the text to finally cried yourself to sleep in your bathroom, your hand on your mouth trying to muffled the sound.

The floor was freezing when you woke up, everything felt freezing in your house, in your body. Once you remembered, tears were running your cheeks and this time you didn’t shut yourself and screamed in agony.

He was gone.

He was gone and you were alone.

The first week was the hardest, you didn’t left your room and the last piece of him that was the shirt you wore that night.

The tissue did not smelled like him anymore.

Every day, every hour you were waiting for him to open your door arms full of bags from the grocery store ready to cook you something.

Chanyeol, yours aunts, Yixing, everyone tried to contact you, but you never answered them.

Every night Chanyeol wait for you to sleep and came, he was feeling guilty and you were his best friend. Every night he did the same, he tucked you and stroked your hair. Hoping one day you would be able to find peace with yourself, but that wasn’t the only thing on his plan !

You sat at your kitchen bar, you computer in front of you but all you did was staring at your window, your chin resting in your left hand.

You didn’t even watch Chanyeol sitting right in front of you searching something in one of his books. ‘’Cousin, aren’t you suppose to do mails stuff ?’’

‘’Chanyeol, aren’t you suppose to do king of hell stuffs?’’ Your sarcasm did in fact burn like hell !

‘’You know I became the king of underworld, so you selfishly could stay on earth and do selfish human things as the bratty witch you are’’

Why was Chanyeol even here at this point ? He wasn’t wrong, to be honest. All you did for the last few days was crying, sleeping, and being a brat to everyone who tried to help you what so ever.

‘’Cousin, life have so much to offer’’

‘’Fake, life sucks and I feel so done with it’’ He sighed loudly, feeling done with you.

Ignoring yours friends, cousin, aunts was purely selfish and you knew it but at this point you clearly didn’t give a damn .. but at the same time it was your fault and only your fault, if you didn’t use this spell, just to shut people and their needs to talk about your life.

It’s been 3 weeks, the first been the miserable one, the two second mark the start of the ‘new you’.

You were purely self-destructive at this point, losing Kyungsoo hurt you but what you did to yourself was worst. Invoking sex demons, trying spell to not feel anything, everything was good to ‘make you forget’.

‘’You know Sehun, fuck Satan and all that witchy shit’’

You were clearly drunk, and Sehun knew he shouldn’t give you anymore drinks but his pub had the best reputation with the witch population of Seoul, you lost the count of drinks you already drank.

‘’ You probably should go at home and sleep Y/N, I dont need the king of Hell to come and kill me’’

‘’Chanyeol ? He can kiss my ass ! Y’all can kiss my ass’’ your drunk behavior wasn’t a pretty sight.

After that Sehun didn’t understand a word you said, you were half crying, half mumbling. Poor bartender did not has the choice but to call Chanyeol to have an explanation and to get you back at your apartment.

‘’ Y/N you can’t live your life off ‘not feeling anything’ spells’’

Cold water woke you up, you stood in you shower fully clothed and your cousin holding the shower head.

‘’Why the hell are you doin’ that ?’’

‘’You asshole, needed a wake up call’’

Chanyeol was tired of seeing you being a danger to yourself, and decided enough was enough.

The heavy weight on your shoulders dropped suddenly and you body followed dropping in your cousin’s arms. ‘’ I just miss him so much Yeol’’

He watched tears rolling on your cheeks, not saying anything but his hand caressing your back.

Even if lives are connected Chanyeol couldn’t guarantee Kyungsoo’s comeback, your two souls might be connected since the beginning but the way they forced Kyungsoo into his human form couldn’t guarantee anything about their futur or life together. But he couldn’t tell you all that, like he couldn’t say he was following the man everyday.

And that you left your mark on him, he was now a wizard.

‘’ I’m here Y/N you can sleep’’

He laid you down on your bed, caressing your hair and projecting dreams in your head to give you a break, Chanyeol was the king of Hell, but he was hurt seeing his best friend and cousin living like that, he was ready to fight anyone so you could be happy again and to see you eyes full of stars just like when you were looking at Kyungsoo.

Chanyeol always knew that Kyungsoo’s heart was beating he felt it the first time he met him. And right after that he started his search about the man.

After that night you practically lived in the academy, teaching younger witches just like your aunts wanted. Reading books to perfect your magic. ‘’You know since you came to the academy everything seems simpler’’ Said your colleague Jongdae ‘’ Kids seems to like having one of the most powerful witch of the century teaching them stuffs’’ You nodded.

‘’Sorry Jongdae but I’m taking my cousin out for lunch’’

Chanyeol took you to Chinatown, celebrating one of his friend opening his own restaurant .. who were you to say no to free food ?

Lunch was nice, a private room for the two of you and all the best food on the menu. ‘’So the academy ?’’

‘’It’s good, kids are funny .. Yeol did you .. like killed someone for this guy ?’’

He laughed a bit too much ‘’ Not, it’s a guy a met not long ago and we became friends .. he is like us ‘magic’ he’ll come to see us’’

You nodded, finishing you plate and drinking a bit of the Chinese whisky that was left in your cup.

Chanyeol left you to go the to toilet, what type of cousin is he ? He need to go to the toilet when his friend was supposed to met the two of you ? Asshole !

The door opened and your phone vibrated at the same time a text from you cousin, why was he sending you a text when coming back in the private room ?

CHANYEOL:

I find him for you ..

Who did he find for you ?

‘’Chanyeol ?’’ You knew the voice, you once again felt the time stop when you turned around finding .. Do Kyungsoo in a chef attire.

Do Kyungsoo was the friend of Chanyeol, the one he wanted you to meet ..

‘’You are ?’’ Right he forgot about you. ‘’Oh yeah you’re Y/N .. Chanyeol told me a lot about you and you’re like the most powerful in our coven’’

A single tear rolled onto your cheek, you find him .. he was in front of you.

You finally find him, thanks to Chanyeol.

96 notes · View notes

restapesta · 4 years ago

Text

gossip never ends

Mickey Milkovich simply just showed up one day at the Old Army, tattoos on his knuckles and a scowl on his face. Lola couldn't help but be intrigued -- nobody lasts here long enough to pique her interest, but there was something special about this guy. The gossip spreads like wildfire, but Mickey's something else altogether -- it's just a matter of time before Lola and her friends figured out why.

OR: How Mickey's coworkers found out about who Mickey really was back in season 10 -- this is more of an outlook on Mickey and his feelings throughout season 10 and how it reflected on his job and altogether his demeanor.

This is based on a prompt by @whatwouldmickeydo which was also even more explored by one of my favorite Gallavich accounts on Tumblr @ianandmickeygallavich -- so, I simply just worked through what they had already created. I hope they don't mind I used their prompt and this is dedicated to both of them! Enjoy!

words: 5.3k

The gossip began almost the exact moment Mickey was introduced to the three workers by the manager.

The Old Army staff was not a stranger to new workers coming and going, some people sticking around longer, working for a couple of months without stop, maybe even sticking around for a full-time position; some just passing through while on trial-basis, failing to meet the manager's demands and simply moving on to find better or more fitting employment -- but the sight of Mickey Milkovich was definitely not something, Lola thought, anybody, not just the curious employees, was used to.

Lola fell into the group of people who had been working at the store for ages now, starting years ago and still sticking around now, subsequently being present for all the biggest changes made to and within the popular store. She saw the interior change, the managers shift, the employees getting hired and fired -- she saw it all. It couldn't be said for many people. Honestly, only three members of the Old Army staff had actually been working full-time here, while everybody else was just a passing face.

She was so used to seeing new faces that it simply did not phase her anymore -- Lola had her own stable position in the store; she had her colleagues which she got along with, and she never paid much attention to the newbies once they came into the store. She knew it was almost always just for a short while, basically until they made a mistake while working and got politely declined for the position, so she usually just remained civil, not engaging in much mingling or bonding -- it wouldn't last anyway.

The staff change happened way too often, especially with security. The store management had no idea how to pick the right person for the job -- they either always chose the gangly, skinny types; the ones who couldn't defend others or themselves from a burglar if their life depended on it, or they chose the fatties who had a donut too many during their break and couldn't chase ten feet after the culprit.

Still, this guy -- this new, weirdly interesting guy -- seemed promising.

Lola had no idea where they managed to find him -- he was kinda hot, and definitely in really good shape with thighs and calves that could probably kill if they wanted to. He seemed crude and unapproachable, and the brooding, mysterious attitude definitely didn't quench anybody's curiosity as to where the hell he came from and how the hell they managed to find him of all the people in the world. A scowl was constantly etched on the newcomer's face -- not just when he was being introduced to the staff by the manager, as Lola thought would be the case -- but literally at every single given moment of the workday.

There were only rare moments Lola and the others saw him smile -- usually every single one of those moments being when he was texting someone during his break, or when he was coming back from having lunch with someone at the food court. Not that anyone would dare ask who, although they definitely speculated.

Mickey was the type of guy Lola was interested in making friends with. She approached him once during their shared shift -- usually, she wouldn't even bother, seeing how these guards come and go, but this one really piqued her interest -- trying to figure out who he was, where he came from, what he was doing here. Was he single? She needed to know for her lady friend considering how he was most definitely a sight for sore eyes.

It came as somewhat a surprise when he gave off clipped answers to her questions, most of them not even answering.

"Did you always work security?" She'd ask with a bright smile.

"You could say that."

Silence.

"How long are you planning on staying with us?" Trial-basis or undefined employment? Lola wondered silently.

"Until Larry finds me a better job."

Silence.

"Who?"

Silence. And then a quick, "Never mind."

Lola had officially given up on her efforts to befriend and find out more about the man once Mickey gave her a sharp, pointed stare after she pointed out he didn't have a ring on his finger, hoping he would reveal his relationship status to her.

She most certainly wasn't that lucky, and she almost shat her pants at the murderous expression on his face. She didn't ask again.

The others tried to pry information out of Mickey too, but they certainly lacked the subtlety Lola had. She honestly couldn't say she was the most discreet person in the world, but she was in the Old Army, considering how she found herself working with the two most non-discreet people in the world. Lola was upfront too -- let's not get that wrong.

But at least she didn't outright ask him if he was in a gang like Jeremy did.

"I wanted to know if the tattoos were gang symbols! They freaked me out!" The skinny twenty-year-old replied when the other workers gaped at him with wide eyes.

Jenna shook her head. "Dude, you can't just ask a guy if he was in a gang."

He wouldn't reveal his age, let alone his gang status if he had one, Lola scolded Jeremy mentally. The guy was as open as a seashell -- you could try and pry it open to see if it had a pearl inside, but you'll most likely fail and, to be honest, probably get pinched in the process, if not careful. It was perhaps best not to even try or, if you did, to proceed with extreme caution. A bunch of seashells didn't even have pearls in them anyway, so it'd all be useless in the end.

It only took a week for the staff to find out how Mickey managed to find himself here at Old Army out of all the possible places in the world. It was a shock, to say the least.

One morning, the revelation came when Larry Seaver showed up to the store, dressed in a nice suit and tie, wearing his casual, perky smile. He asked for the manager and had greeted Mickey immediately once he laid eyes on the man. Larry approached him as Jeremy went to get the manager, placing a firm hand on Mickey's shoulder, smiling widely at him.

Lola and Jenna weren't snooping, but they did manage to overhear Larry asking Mickey if he enjoyed working here; if everything was going well; if he was staying out of trouble -- a question that certainly didn't help stop the gossip -- and if he settled in home nicely.

Mickey responded to most of his questions with short, non-descriptive answers, but not with any malice or disdain. He answered them as if he had to, putting an emphasis on the "I'm not getting into any trouble, don't worry Mr. Cheery," making Lola wonder why the question even needed to be posed.

When the manager finally showed up, greeting the man happily, Larry followed him to his office, leaving the others to get back to the customers -- and some to get back to stopping crime. It was only when Larry Seaver left that Jenna shouted, "Oh my God, he's a parole officer!" at the other two workers while drinking coffee in the break room.

"He's a what?" Jeremy asked, slightly confused.

"A parole officer! I heard him talking to the manager about Mickey and how he's settling in. Mickey is a parolee!"

"Jesus Christ, I knew it! And you told me I shouldn't be scared." Jeremy answered with a sullen look, exaggerating a shudder.

Lola quirked an eyebrow at her friend. "Were you eavesdropping?" She was more amused than surprised if she was honest.

Jenna shook her head at Lola in exasperation. "So not the point. Lola, the guy went to prison!"

"We should all just quit now," Jeremy added.

"Come on, you big baby. The guy keeps to himself. You have literally nothing to be scared of." Lola was rolling her eyes at the man, slightly annoyed at the comments.

It didn't surprise her Mickey was here on parole -- it didn't surprise her he was in prison at all. He seemed like the type, not just because of his sullen look and crude knuckle tattoos. It also had a lot to do with the way he carried himself as if the entire world was against him and he needed to protect himself from the inevitable upcoming battle. It was probably why he never spoke to anybody, why he never had coffee with them, and why he seemed to avoid human contact at all possible times. It was also, now, very much obvious why he was so good at guarding the store -- it takes a criminal to catch a criminal, she guessed.

Honestly, it all just made him more interesting.

"I kind of think it's hot," Jenna admitted sheepishly.

Jeremy's eyes bulged out. "You're kidding me."

She shook her head, smiling like a teenage girl. "He's dark, brooding, mysterious. And he's got a really nice ass."

Lola laughed at her friend and at Jeremy's horrified expression. "You should go flirt with him. Maybe you'll be able to figure out if he's single or not." She was only partly joking. Jenna probably didn't need a repeat of what Lola had gone through.

She sighed sadly. "A guy like that is not single."

"Yeah, sure. An ex-con definitely isn't single and is probably in an extremely committed relationship with somebody who loves him for who he is. And that same ex-con guy totally loves somebody back with his whole, entire heart." Jeremy quipped sarcastically and Jenna pinched his bicep in response.

"Love is love, asshole. People murder for love."

Jeremy nodded in response. "Exactly. That's probably why he was in prison."

Jenna rolled her eyes. "You know what? Unlike Jeremy here, I'm not a pussy. I'm gonna go talk to him."

Lola's eyes widened in response and she smiled widely. If anyone would take the bullet for the team, it'd be Jenna. "You go, girl! Get him. Just make sure to be subtle about it"

Jeremy and Lola watched as Jenna went up to Mickey who was standing next to the Old Army store entrance, looking as bored and uninterested as ever. When he saw Jenna approaching, he grimaced, obviously preparing himself for the confrontation.

Jeremy and Lola locked eyes as Jenna began to audibly flirt with Mickey. They couldn't hear everything she was saying from where they were eavesdropping but they didn't hear Mickey even speak. Based on the disappointed look on Jenna's face when she walked into the break room again, they didn't think it went that well.

"So?" Lola inquired hopefully.

Jenna shook her head. "Completely uninterested. I even made my boobs look bigger in this shirt. Didn't work, obviously."

"What'd he say?" Lola probed deeper.

"Well, I asked where he lived, where he used to work, if he was settling in nicely -- and he just kind of hummed."

"Hummed?"

"He barely even answered the questions."

"Maybe he's gay and in a committed relationship with a dude," Jeremy added sarcastically, once again. "Maybe I should go up and flirt with him instead. See if it works for me."

Jenna rolled her eyes at Jeremy's sarcasm. "You're too big of a pussy to do it. Plus he's probably not gay."

Jeremy didn't rise to the bait. Instead, he just smiled. "Whatever you say, Jenny. Oh, by the way -- I totally am."

Mickey never spent his break with the others. In fact, he was either sitting outside the store, drinking Pinkberry and messing around with his phone, or he was at the food court, presumably meeting somebody for lunch. Lola was dying to know who, but she never dared to ask or to check, although it would have been so easy.

The curiosity extended out of the workplace as well -- Jenna, Lola, and Jeremy had a group chat. It was, at first, formed as a work chat, purely for announcements and work hours, but as time passed -- and as the employees and employers changed -- it evolved into something much more. Now, it was their main gossiping media.

--- old army besties ---

LOLA (9:56 PM): I can't find him anywhere on social media.

JEREMY (9:58 PM): You're obsessed.

LOLA (9:58 PM): Fuck off, Jeremy.

JENNA (10:03 PM): There are a bunch of articles about him escaping prison!!!!!!!!!

LOLA (10:04 PM): NO SHIT

LOLA (10:04 PM): LINK NOW

LOLA (10:04 PM): !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

JENNA (10:06 PM): https://images.app.goo.gl/rzDzCogf1H84QD78A

JENNA (10:06 PM): HEHAGDJADGAIGDAJFGAJFGAJFGA

LOLA (10:08 PM): oh my god

JENNA (10:08 PM): I KNOW

JEREMY (10:07 PM): ya'll are crazy

JENNA (10:08 PM): Is it bad it just makes me even more attracted to him??????

JEREMY (10:09 PM): yes.

LOLA (10:09 PM): NO!

LOLA (10:10 PM): Jenna, same.

JEREMY (10:11 PM): I have a psych ward to recommend you to. Hold up.

JENNA (10:11 PM): Jeremy, stfu

*JEREMY has left the chat*

LOLA (10:12 PM): You wanna add him back in or should I?

JENNA (10:12 PM): Neither.

JENNA (10:12 PM): Let him suffer.

The gossiping continued for a while. It didn't honestly seem like it would stop at all, and nobody really seemed inclined to put an end to the wildfire gossip that spread through the entire Old Army staff. Not that anyone cared much, either, if they were being completely honest.

One day, though, the Mickey who was always grumpy and never without a scowl seemed particularly furious.

He spoke to no one, he didn't check his phone at all, which was a rare occurrence and almost never happened -- he was usually glued to the thing, always texting someone -- and he basically looked like he was ready to kill the next person who dared steal something from the store.

"Anyone wanna ask what crawled up his ass and died?" Jenna asked lowly, observing Mickey from where she and Lola stood behind the cash register. Jeremy hung around in the back, angry that they still hadn't added him back to the group chat.

Lola simply grimaced. "I guess we've been dealing with happy Mickey all this time."

Jeremy pretended not to pay much attention to them, very much bitter. He just muttered, as a side note, loud enough to get even Mickey's attention, "Yo, I guess they found who killed that parole officer."

That piqued Lola's interest. The murder was all over the news the day before -- a parole officer named Paula had been thrown out the window -- and Lola didn't expect them to have found the killer so soon.

"Already?" She wondered, out loud.

"Who is it?" Jenna asked.

"Some ex of hers -- Shelly, I think. They arrested her yesterday."

Lola released a sigh. "That's some good news. Now she can't hurt anybody else." She mentally applauded the police for the good and quick work.

Out of the corner of her eye, she noticed Mickey was listening in to their conversation. She could have sworn she heard him snort when she muttered the last part, the one about it being good news. She saw an opening, and when Lola began to open her mouth and try and include him in the conversation, he had already turned around and left to stand back at his regular spot, expression sullen, pretending as if he never even cared to listen in after all.

Mickey was gone all of a sudden one day -- as the manager had told them briefly, on paid leave. He didn't reveal why or when he'd be coming back, only saying how Mickey had something important come up, and that he'd eventually be back. He didn't seem to be aggravated while talking about Mickey, so Lola guessed he didn't get fired, nor that he was being tested again for his position -- he had honestly been doing great. Better than the ones before him, at least.

Lola was actually somewhat shocked. She was also slightly disappointed he didn't tell her.

Mickey had actually started opening up a little -- not much (when she said little she meant very little) -- but he was finally communicating with them during their shift together, something he most certainly hadn't even tried to do, no matter how hard they tried to push. He also seemed happier, coming in one morning looking the happiest Lola had ever seen him.

It was the first day Mickey made actual conversation with her -- about the ugly clothes in the store, nevertheless -- and she genuinely was starting to like him.

"Maybe he likes you," Jenna told her after noticing them talking.

Lola blushed. "Probably not."

Jeremy snorted and both women turned towards him. "He's probably more attracted to me than you." He muttered absentmindedly while scrolling through his phone.

"Still sticking to the gay theory?" Jenna asked pointedly.

"I may not be dark, brooding, and mysterious, but my gaydar is on point. At first, I was skeptical, but he rocks that pink pastel shirt a little too well." He said, a small smile playing on his lips.

Jenna and Lola shared a look before both rolling their eyes.

"Let's hope he asks you out." Jenna finished and Lola blushed even more. Stupid crush. Jeremy snorted.

She was a little disappointed he was gone but his step-in was a cute guy and the gossip between her, Jeremy, and Jenna was endless -- Jenna and Lola came up with different theories as to where he was which all ranged from family emergencies to crazy prison breaks -- Jeremy would simply roll their eyes at them whenever a new theory came up.

When Mickey came back a couple of days later, it seemed as if he had a spring in his step. For the first time in all the time Lola had known him, instead of a scowl, there was a smile present on his face.

"Holy shit, he's smiling." Jenna pointed out incredulously, and Lola simply nodded shell-shocked. He had a beautiful smile.

It was even weirder when he greeted them when he walked into the store, uttering a simple, "Hey" which neither woman expected.

"So, that's happy Mickey," Lola said under her breath. "Good to know."

The sudden chirpiness didn't disappear throughout his entire shift and Lola began to wonder what type of vacation he had gone on to be this happy. She needed to ask him -- if it could take the stick out of his ass, then it could definitely make her feel like she was in heaven.

The answer came shortly after.

"He's got a ring on his finger."

"What?" Lola and Jenna exclaimed simultaneously, looking at Jeremy like he was crazy.

"The hell are you talking about?" Jenna asked, glancing between Jeremy and Mickey, inconspicuously trying to catch a glimpse of Mickey's hand.

"He's married, guys. He probably got married while he was away. There is a golden band on his ring finger."

Lola and Jenna were surprised they missed it. The ring shone brightly on his left hand, reflecting the shitty lighting of the Old Army store. It looked beautiful and, somehow, it made him look complete. She didn't even realize something was missing until it was there, staring straight at them. That's what the wedding ring seemed like -- a piece of Mickey they were all simply missing. Something that let them know that there was somebody in his life, a single person, who had his heart -- a person who managed to pry open the shell and find the pearl. Perhaps the process was painless; perhaps it wasn't -- Lola supposed there were only two people in the universe who truly knew the answer to that question.

"Well, I didn't see that coming."

Lola chuckled, letting the genuine happiness she felt for him consume her. "Me either."

The next time she passed him, she smiled at the ring widely. "Congratulations! I see the ring." She pointed at his hand.

Mickey smiled softly, gazing at it with a look in his eye Lola could only describe as love. "Yeah, thanks."He seemed a little uncomfortable, so Lola refrained from asking about his wife, and if he had any pictures to show her. She was learning new things about this man every day. The woman who tied him down must have been patient, but also extremely lucky.

"Ugh, I wish he was single," Jenna muttered again later on in the day, gazing longingly at Mickey's ass. "That butt makes the whole ex-con, escaping prison thing worth it."

Lola laughed at her friend, agreeing silently.

It was nearing the end of their shift, and the four people had changed out of their uniforms, getting rid of the ugly pastel pink color, exchanging it with something that was actually fashionable -- Mickey had an especially good fashion sense, in Lola's opinion (he could rock ripped jeans). Mickey had still been in the staff changing room when Lola noticed a guy hanging around the store. A tall, extremely hot redheaded guy, with one of the best bodies she'd seen on a man in a while.

She shook Jenna's arm so she could point out the guy to her, aware that Jenna deserved to gaze at a man this good-looking. He was wearing a tight-fitting black shirt along with skinny jeans that accentuated all of his muscles, from the ones in his arms to his leg ones -- he was ripped, and Lola could only assume there were chiseled abs hiding underneath the shirt. He was drop-dead gorgeous.

Jenna turned around to see what the fuss was about, but her mouth fell open when her eyes landed in the ginger.

"Oh my God, I think just came."

"Me too," Lola admitted. She was genuinely concerned for her wellbeing. "I think we need to get laid."

"Definitely." Jenna's eyes were glued to the man. His hair was perfect too -- slicked back, and just... it was a sort of, ' you simply had to see it to believe it' type of situation. He was beautiful. "Man, how the fuck does God create these men?"

Jenna didn't tear her eyes away. "He must be either really bad in bed or a total douchebag. There's no way he's that hot and nice too."

They suddenly heard Mickey's voice behind them. "Trust me, he's neither."

Lola and Jenna jumped in surprise, but she didn't even have a moment to think about what Mickey said. She was still looking at the ginger, but his green eyes were locked on somebody else though, and he didn't even seem to notice the two women gaping openly at him.

When Lola turned to follow his gaze she was surprised to see it land on Mickey.

"Oh my dear Lord, he's totally eye-fucking Mickey!" She whisper-shouted at Jenna, Mickey being far away not to hear her. Jenna whipped her head around towards where Mickey stood, seemingly unaware.

"Oh my God, he totally is!"

Mickey noticed them staring. He raised an eyebrow at the two women and then as if on a whim, approached them. "You need anything?" He asked, seemingly uncomfortable, but he still paid no attention to the fact a guy was blatantly letting it show on his face that he was imagining all of the things he could probably be doing to Mickey, right now. The redhead had the biggest case of bed-eyes she'd seen in a while.

Lola blinked herself out of her daze. "Um, no. Uh, we just-- we, uh--" She was at a loss for words and Jenna didn't seem to even think about helping.

"Ugh, God." They suddenly heard Jeremy exclaim. All eyes turned to him. "There's a really hot guy outside the store, and he's staring at you." He made a gesture as if saying, 'See, that wasn't so hard now, was it?'. "That's what they're trying to say."

Mickey turned to look forward outside and when his gaze fell on the guy -- the guy he had most certainly already noticed -- his face lit up even more, and his lip curled into a smirk. He turned towards Jeremy and nodded at him. "Glad to see you toughening up."

Jeremy smiled at Mickey as if they were sharing an inside joke, and both Lola and Jenna had no idea what it was. They shared a disbelieving look. "Learned from the best, man," Jeremy replied as they fist-bumped and Lola knew her and Jenna's eyes had to be unnaturally wide.

"So um, so you know the guy outside? He's totally checking you out." Jenna nodded at the hot guy who was still watching them -- watching Mickey, specifically. Lola guessed he was waiting for him, for whatever reason. She guessed hot guys stuck together. If he wasn't a ginger, Lola would have assumed they were brothers and that the good looks simply ran in the gene pool. Lola watched as Mickey locked eyes with the man and smiled. The guy raised his eyebrows in question and Mickey just kept the grin on his face.

"That's Ian, my husband."

Shock couldn't even begin to describe what Lola was currently feeling. If somebody had dumped a bucket of ice-cold water down her back, she would have probably been less surprised. As she was contemplating everything she knew and had been learning about Mickey, the man in question waved towards Ian to join them. Ian made his way inside and Lola could lie and say she didn't swoon.

"Hi." He greeted sheepishly with a smile, previously observing the commotion.

Mickey seemed unnaturally relaxed as he stood close to Ian, wrapping a hand behind his back subconsciously. Lola wondered who the man in front of her was -- it most certainly wasn't the grump Lola had been working with all this time.

"Ian, meet Lola, Jenna, and Jeremy."

Ian smiled politely at all three of them, leaving Lola in a daze -- God, he was gorgeous. She was just about to reply when he nodded at Jeremy specifically. "Sup, Jeremy. Heard a lot about you."

Jeremy smiled back at Ian. "Same, dude. Your husband just can't seem to shut up about you."

Ian smirked, and then turned to look at Mickey, "Is that so?"

Mickey rolled his eyes. "Fuck you both. I got married. What am I supposed to do? Just shut up about it? Hell no."

Ian laughed and draped an arm around Mickey's shoulder. "Don't worry, baby. I don't mind."

Ian and Mickey shared a quick look, and Lola wondered if she would ever find a person who would look at her the way these two men looked at each other. She suddenly felt bad for thinking Mickey was straight -- everything about this simple interaction screamed gay.

"We should head home, I know you've been waiting for ages outside."

Ian nodded. "Yeah okay, let's go." He then smiled at the three people in front of them widely. "It was nice meeting you guys."

Jeremy was the only one capable of responding. "You too."

"See ya'," Mickey muttered lamely as a goodbye and the couple was out of the store in the blink of an eye, arms wrapped around each other, talking quietly, their expressions pure happiness.

Lola and Jenna turned around to stare at their friend.

"What the fuck was that?" Lola asked, incredulous.

The traitor in front of them shrugged. "What? While you guys were coming up with conspiracies and weird theories, I actually talked to the guy. He's pretty cool. He was raised and lives on the Southside where he met Ian. He first spent some time in juvie. Got shot twice. Went to prison, escaped from prison, went to Mexico, worked for a cartel, rolled on said cartel be with Ian. They were in prison together and they decided to get married when they got out. He's actually been giving me tips to boost my street cred. We've been working on that shit for some time now."

Lola shook her head in thought. "When did you guys become so close?"

Jeremy snorted. "When you decided not 5o add me back to the group chat, bitches." He smirked. "Revenge is a dish best served cold." As an afterthought, he added, "I'm not dark and brooding, but I guess I can add mysterious to my list of charms."

Lola and Jenna watched him as he turned around.

"Is it just me or did he suddenly get hot?"

Lola sighed loudly. "I think we've been tricked."

Jenna groaned, suddenly. "I can't believe it. Two men that hot -- and they end up with each other. Like, what the fuck? Why can't there be one for me?"

Lola laughed, but, as always, silently agreed.

Everybody lost their jobs when the pandemic hit, and when the Old Army finally went back into business, Mickey Milkovich wasn't there. The gossip moved on to different topics and different employees -- the hot security guard was nothing but a distant memory.

The next time Lola saw them was years later. She was much older, much more experienced, and much more in love. She had met somebody, had fallen deep, and it had changed her life for the better.

Love was an interesting thing.

Mickey was standing at the corner of a street. The sun was shining brightly above him, and Lola realized he still looked as beautiful as ever -- his face was much more relaxed though as if the walls he had spent years putting up were suddenly all down, letting his pearl shine through, and glint in the sun. He was waiting for somebody outside of a store, and somehow, Lola knew it was his husband.

She couldn't remember his name, but she could never forget the look.

So many years had passed, and Lola had gone through so many relationships -- but the look was what always had her looking for more, never settling for anything short of what she knew she could have. What they showed her she could have.

Once she found someone who looked at her the way Ian -- Lola would only remember his name sometime later in the day -- looked at Mickey, and somebody she would look at the way Mickey looked at Ian -- that was when she'd know she had found the one.

Ian exited the store, much to Lola's expectation, his red hair, slightly grown out, fiery red in the Sun. The boy holding his hand was smiling widely, and the smile only grew once he saw Mickey.

The boy dropped Ian's hand and ran towards -- Lola simply knew -- his father, jumping into his arms. Mickey picked the small boy up effortlessly -- he was no older than five -- laughing along with him as the boy dove into, what Lola presumed, a story.

Ian and Mickey shared a look, so akin to the one they had shared that day, years ago, in the store, filled with so much love, adoration and happiness before focusing their gazes on their child. It wasn't just between them anymore -- the love they had was now for the little boy as well, nurturing and taking care of him, allowing him to bask in it. They probably didn't even realize they were doing it.

Lola felt tears in her eyes.

She had once searched for the look.

Now, she hoped she would one day be able to share this look with her own husband and her own child.

Lola patted her swollen belly.

One day.

She watched as the two men and boy pulled away, still listening to the story the boy was telling. Lola pulled her phone out as she watched their retreating forms.

Lola opened the group chat, typing excitedly.

--- old army besties ---

LOLA (12:33 PM): You'll never guess who I just saw.

She was thankful for many things Mickey Milkovich showed her, but the one thing she was grateful for the most was that thanks to him, the gossip never ended.

#gallavich #ian and mickey #Ian Gallagher #mickey milkovich #ian x mickey #fanfic #based on a prompt #shameless #ian gallagher #ianxmickey #shameless us

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lassieposting · 3 years ago

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I'm mad at myself for asking this but 💘 skug/alt!Serpine

WHEEZES

U CONVERTED

send me 💘 + A SHIP and i’ll tell you—

where they first met and how

KOTW.

Then, after Skug refuses to kill Serpine at the end of SOW, China spitefully makes him responsible for Serpine's behaviour while he's living in Roarhaven. "Parole officer" isn't part of Skug's job description but honestly he doesn't trust anyone else to make sure Serpine doesn't slip the leash, so

how long their ‘flirting’ phase was before feelings got involved

I mean, Serpine literally gets his dick out in their very first scene together, and he throws his towel over Val's head so it clearly wasn't for her benefit.

My headcanon is that he did have the hots for his own dimension's Skulduggery before he died. But Serpine has a very warped experience of emotions - he's not insane, and he's not a complete psychopath, but he has very low empathy, an obsessive personality, a considerable sadistic streak and a tendency to be jealous, narcissistic and manipulative. So his crush on Skug was more like an unhealthy fixation - hatred and lust and humiliation and the need to control, all tangled together.

On Skug's side...he has a few lines that read as flirty, in a D/S kind of way. But honestly I don't think this was deliberate. I get the impression he's actually imitating how Serpine spoke to him when he was the prisoner. Serpine's entire arc in SOW can be condensed down to "microdosing on what he put Skug through before killing him". He's surrounded by enemies who want him dead, he loses a body part, he's beaten up, he's humiliated, he's cut off from his magic - and he hates it. I get the vibe that this isn't lost on Skug, and he's repeating things Serpine once mockingly said to him just to rub it in.

who fell for who first ( if applicable )

Serpine.

I have him converting to the Church of the Faceless as a teenager, so he's spent his entire adult life surrounded by other selfish, scheming social climbers who'd sell him to Satan for a corn chip. His relationship history is chock full of psychopaths. He's used to betrayal and being used by his partners - such is life, as a bad guy.

So Skug protecting him during the Leibniz mission makes quite an impact. He even says himself that Skug has every reason to hate him and want to make him suffer - which is an attempt at empathy considerably deeper than anything we've seen from him before - but he's still shocked and devastated when Skug cuts his hand off. He genuinely expected Skug to decide to fight their way out rather than harm him. To me, that says he's come to rely on having Skug in his corner, which is a security net he is decidedly not used to having.

He doesn't necessarily express it very well? His feelings are complicated, and he doesn't understand most of them. A good part of him still hates Skug, just as a good part of Skug will always hate him. But his fixation on Skug shifts a bit - rather than obsessing over him as an enemy, he obsesses over him as an ally. He starts wanting Skug's approval and digging for praise, he gets sulky and jealous if Skug implies he doesn't trust him or goes to someone else for help or information instead, and he starts trying to insert himself into Skug's life.

Basically, he's gotten over that he spent the past 300 years as Skug's enemy, so Skug needs to be over it too. Right now. And it's unreasonable and unfair that he isn't over it.

where their first date was and what it was like

Skug is willing to acknowledge that if they were a couple, which they're not, because they're arch enemies, then maybe, if you really had to look at anything they do as "a date" then...perhaps the first time they went to the opera could in some way be considered their first date. But it wasn't. Because they're not together. He doesn't even like Serpine. Valkyrie just doesn't appreciate "yowling" and he had nobody else to go with because all his friends are dead.

Serpine will agree with this - but only because he knows that announcing that he lowkey considers their three day torture extravaganza to be their first date would go down like a lead balloon.

who asks who out and how ( with a sign? spelled out on a cake? just a simple ‘will you go out with me’? )

They never have a "going steady" discussion. It's just

if they keep / kept their relationship secret or let everyone know right away

They're adamant that there's nothing to let anyone know about. They spend a lot of time together, and sometimes Serpine helps with cases, and they angry fuck sometimes, and Skug keeps a few shirts and a toothbrush at Serpine's apartment, but they're not a couple.

who’s more dominant

Skug. Serpine will die mad about it. He complains constantly about how much he gets manhandled during the Leibniz mission, how undignified it is to be cut off from his magic, how everyone tells him to shut up every time he tries to join in a conversation, he hates you all, remember that time he killed people you all cared about?

Unfortunately, Serpine is a massively subby bottom, so dom!Skug makes him deeply horny and even more angry about it. He's the epitome of "Stop looking at my fucking boner when we fight."

where their first kiss was and what it was like

It's New Year's. Serpine is out at a bar with some of his student neighbours because, why not. Skug is at the same bar, questioning the staff about a grizzly murder. The usual. Serpine goes over to say hello and make fun of him for Always Working and tell him he should chill out on occasion because isn't it your fucking birthday and you're still at work??? They're still talking when the countdown finishes and everyone around them starts kissing, which is a completely new concept to Serpine because that tradition wasn't part of the Leibniz dimension's New Year's festivities, so he just sort of panics because everyone else is doing it, grabs Skug by the front of his coat and goes for it.

Skug freezes, because who would know how to react when the man who killed you once tries to go to town on your fake face, and then gets his shit together and promptly arrests Serpine for assaulting a Sanctuary official, because he's petty and he can and Nef needs to learn some fucking boundaries.

They end up lowkey working on the case together through the bars of the temporary holding cell, and although neither of them would admit it, they actually have a good time. At the end of the night Skug relents, lets him out for "good behaviour" and gives him a lift home.

how into pda they are

Serpine is hugely into PDA. He likes a possessive, jealous partner, he's got a bit of an exhibitionistic streak, and ultimately he wants to be wanted enough to be fought over.

Unfortunately for him, Skug is not a PDA fan in the slightest. Serpine finds this bitterly disappointing.

where their usual ‘date spot’ is ( if applicable )

A Roarhaven restaurant with a live jazz band. Serpine likes the food, Skug likes the music, and it's public - so neither of them feels wrongfooted and vulnerable in the other one's territory. Although, as Serpine likes to point out, it would be a bit difficult to torture and dismember a man in his student accommodation apartment. If he can hear Maddie-across-the-hall having muffled sex with her latest beau from the far side of his flat , he's pretty sure the entire building would hear Skug fighting his way out of whatever diabolical trap he seems to think has been set for him every time he comes over.

who’s more protective

Skug is more obviously protective - he protects Serpine almost the entire time in Leibniz, rows with China in defence of his freedom, and (however reluctantly) steps up to help him settle in Roarhaven. But Serpine is territorial, and he can be surprisingly proactive about it. If Skug comes home injured, he can always tell - no matter how much he tries to hide it - because he's seen Skug at his very worst, he knows what 'trying to mask pain' looks like in the set of that jaw and the grit in that voice. He doesn't like anyone else playing with his toys, so sometimes he'll get very angry and lash out at whoever damaged Skug in the first place.

(He also tends to hover at the clinic like a particularly irritating bad smell. He insists it's because he just finds Skug's pain amusing. He's not concerned. Not in the slightest. He doesn't care at all. No, he will not go home.)

how long it is before they sleep together ( can be as in ‘had sex’ or as in ‘shared a bed’ )

They first hook up a few months after returning from Leibniz, but it's a half-dressed up-against-a-wall sort of thing and neither of them sticks around for pillow talk. They don't actually share a bed - as in, fall asleep together - until at least a year later. Technically, the first time they fall asleep together, they're on a stakeout and Serpine dozes off on Skug's shoulder, then wakes up with a cricked neck.

if they argue about anything

Literally everything, 90% of their interactions are arguing. Bickering and snark is the only way they know how to communicate.

who leaves more marks ( lipstick, hickeys, scratchmarks etc. )

Serpine loves leaving marks and doesn't mind getting them, either. He's territorial and has an exhibitionist streak, so he likes everyone knowing who he belongs to, and he's deeply thirsty over the idea of everyone knowing Skug belongs to him.

Unfortunately, Skug is not easy to leave marks on. Any hickies he gives the facade will disappear as soon as Skug turns it off. Some of his scars still show, though - the ones that scored his bones - so at least there's that.

who steals whose clothes and how often

They're not too different in size, so they could probably both get away with it, but everything Skug owns was tailored for him and Nef is narrower in the shoulders, so Skug's shirts don't look quite right on him. That doesn't stop him borrowing a couple to wear around the house, though. He has no stored wealth in this dimension, so he's wearing off the rack until he can get his feet under him again, and Skug's shirts are all obnoxiously fine fabric. It would be silly not to steal a few.

how they cuddle ( spooning? facing each other? )

They're not that cuddly. They do have occasional moments of softness, but it's more likely to be, like. A shoulder bump. Fixing each other's shirt collar. Tending an injury with a minimum of mockery. They do a fair bit of this when no one's watching, though.

what their favourite nonsexual activity is

Bickering.

They also both like working cases. The Sanctuary won't officially hire Serpine because he is who he is, but when Skug hits a dead end in a case or has something that's really frustrating him, they'll go over it together. 400 years of enmity aside, their minds work in similar ways, and they're both very good at that sort of thing - if they hadn't met on opposite sides of the battlefield, they probably would have gotten along very well.

how long they stay mad at each other

They've never actually not been mad at each other. They're just all each other has left because all their friends are dead.

what their usual coffee / tea orders are

Initially, both black - maximum stimulants for Skug, maximum edginess for Serpine. But then he discovers Starbucks, and all the fancy things mortals are doing with coffee these days, and starts branching out into what Skug calls "frilly froufrou nonsense". After that his drinks are like 95% sugar and syrup.

if they ever split up and / or get back together

They never officially split up. This is mostly because neither of them will admit being together in the first place. They absolutely go through phases of being far more enemies than fuckbuddies, and they know how to push each other's buttons and hurt each other like no one else. This ship is comedic and incredibly toxic in turns.

what their shared living space is like ( messy? clean? what kind of decor? )

They don't live together. Serpine has no idea where Skug lives, and Skug wants to keep it that way. Serpine's flat is technically student accommodation - he just needed somewhere the landlord was too young to remember him from the war - so when Skug crashes there it's usually cramped and noisy and there's a revolving door of neighbours knocking on to ask to borrow some milk/loo roll/"hey, you're old, help me with my history thesis?"/"Are you coming out tonight?"

All Serpine's neighbours think he's a sex worker - to them, he seems to have a different well-dressed sugar daddy staying over every week. They keep trying to set him up an OnlyFans. Skug finds all this very amusing.

what their first christmas / hanukkah / etc as a couple was like

Christmas was banned in Leibniz (as a religious holiday of a banned religion) so Nef hasn't celebrated since he converted in his teens, but he gets into it, because it's an excuse for a party and nobody is policing him. Skug is his usual grinchy grouchy self. Nef also celebrates several holidays that Skug isn't familiar with that were commonplace in Leibniz, but are only observed by strict Faceless worshippers in Roarhaven.

what their names are in each other’s phones

Skug is an old man about his contacts, so Nef is just "Nefarian Serpine".

Serpine, on the other hand, has recently discovered emojis, so Skug is "💀🍆".

who falls asleep first and who wakes up first

Who falls asleep first varies; Serpine is a night owl and likes to go to bed in the early hours of the morning, but Skug has some really fucked up working hours, so a lot of the time he's awake long after even the night owls have gone to bed. But it's always Skug who wakes up first - Serpine is Absolutely Not a morning person. He fits right in with the students in his building who have to be coaxed from under the quilt by the smell of frying bacon.

Skug, because he enjoys the odd opportunity to be an asshole, will sometimes wake him with a cup of coffee, and sometimes by holding a flame up to the fire alarm. Variety is the spice of life, Nefarian, didn't anyone ever tell you that?

who’s the big spoon / little spoon

Cuddling is fairly new to Serpine. He's always enjoyed sex, but he has a solid tendency to jump into bed with the enemy - as shown by his laundry list of Resistance conquests - so he's never really gone for relationships where cuddling is a thing. He's more into the "forbidden passion" sort of dynamic.

Skug is a cuddler, but not so much in this particular relationship, for obvious and understandable reasons. Serpine does figure out though that he can burrow under Skug's arm while he's half-asleep or in a postcoital fugue state and Skug will just sort of let him, so he's probably the little spoon.

who hogs the bathroom

Both of them.

Serpine lives in a tiny one bed flat in a student building. His bathroom is miniscule. And when Skug stays over, they're both crammed in there first thing, Serpine trying to shave and do his hair and Skug elbowing him out of the way to cycle through facades until he finds one that's handsome enough to leave the house in. They bicker horrendously the entire time. It's a logistical nightmare.

who kills the spiders / takes them outside

Nef kills them. Not because he knows Skug's not a fan, but because he's not allowed to torment humans anymore, so. Last time he checked, killing spiders wasn't an arrestable offence, Skulduggery, stop looking at him like that.

#skulduggery pleasant #sp headcanons #skulpine #this ship is GARBAGE but listen toxic ships are my jam #long post #yeets my crackships into the tag

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