#my standard carry
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Fleece of the Lamb
#my art#cotl#cotl lamb#catch me getting really fucking carried away with doing design concepts for the fleeces#but yeah this is how i like to draw the standard lambo fleece#i added the fucking uh. collar?? cowl????? thingy simply because i wanted a cult leaders Official Outfit to have a little more ooomph#also i was contemplating how the fleece held together at the neck and decided a tie at the front would look nice#the collar of the fleece goes over the collar of the bell but the ribbon ties underneath the bell#also i decided right away i wanted the fleece to have five points :) so im always pretty consistent with the hemline#i should do a thingy for the tunic i designed to go under the fleece but for this i wanted to focus instead on the embroidery designs
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some additional doodles and a Lot of Headcanons... sorry if im spamming these a little bit. ive got so many thoughts in my head, lmao
theres my older pacifica- after weirdmageddon, her and gideon become friends. theyre both sort of ostracized from the town as a whole bc of their past attitudes/actions so they cling together and become buds. its nice having someone else who 'gets' it.
pacifica moved out as soon as she could to get away from her folks and has a job at a local mall. gideon enables her to enjoy at least SOME of her old luxuries by taking her shopping and to get their nails done together and stuff. also his prison buddies help ''kindly persuade'' her parents not to break her enforced no-contact rule from time to time. i know the two have the bitchiest gossip in the entire town together. sometimes when its hard to be 'nice' they know they can at least vent to the other and they wont get judged for it, yknow?
also some backstory doodles! he was a Normal Kid, Once. or close enough to it. gideon was a sickly child and was sheltered and homeschooled for most of his life. the gleefuls moved from texas to oregon when he was about seven (yes i know this breaks canon a little. its fine shh.) and he found journal 2 shortly after. things went downhill from there
other notes. he's always kept his hair long, but used to either let it down or tie it into a long braid. he very briefly attended a public school and he didnt fare very well there (fat kid + albino + 'girly' + general weird interests is basically painting a massive target on your back) he used to stay up and watch late night televangelists when he couldnt sleep in hospital and copped his aesthetic from there
sorry this post is so long i have a lot of thoughts about him </3
#alloyart#gravity falls#gideon gleeful#pacifica northwest#i dont think pacificas 'aesthetic' changes much apart from she allows herself to be more casual now bc she has less 'standards' to uphold#shes still learning what she actually ENJOYS. because shes had her whole life dictated by her parents up until now. its slow going#its funny how in my 'carrying on from canon' au/timeline basically everyone tries to become a nicer or better person#pacificas parents are not included in this tho. fuck em lol. she does NOT have contact with them if she does not absolutely HAVE to.#and having a pal who knows a lot of criminals is actually comforting. gids puts the wall of muscle between her and her parents#they got that upper-middle class solidarity goin on#anyway. sorry this is a fuckin wall of text. like i said ive got SO many headcanons ive not posted publicly#Talk To Me About Gideon Charles Gleeful [i am gripping my desk very tightly]#(in all seriousness if you ever want to hear more uh. idk. send me an ask or something. ask me about headcanons. i'll be happy)
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sometimes, ngl, i do find myself wondering what it was that made lan wangji fall so desperately in love with wei wuxian - they really are so different and wei wuxian does represent in many ways the antithesis of everything lan wangji lives his life embodying, even if the audience knows how great and amazing wei wuxian is (we also read mainly from his pov and he is basically handcrafted to appeal to modern fandoms), we the audience are not lan wangji, lan wangji isn’t privy to all the same information we are. and then a scene will come along, where wei wuxian will be so earnestly and painfully good, to someone else or to lan wangji himself, and it all makes sense again. like, of course lan wangji was going to fall in love with him how could he not fall in love with him??? really he’s completely powerless when it comes to wei wuxian how could he not be
#i just read the scene where wwx is like i should go carry him so his injury doesn’t get worse#and jc is like why would you do that he hates you and it’s none of our business#and wwx is like it is my business and someone ought to worry about him and like#lwj didn’t hear him but like if he had#dude id fall in love with someone if they said that about me#tho maybe my standards are low#wangxian#lan wangji#wei wuxian#mdzs
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so anyway . kitsune!geto huh
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#EXPLODES#i just wanted to get my thoughts out but i got carried away…..#he’s . a little yan-ish . i think that’s standard for a god though#i love him :3#love how he goes from silly and mischievous to stone cold and expects you to keep up#save me protective sugu … save me…..#ari noises ✩#kitsune!geto <33
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you may have shown this before, but what does the kingdom's sigil look like?
So I haven't yet gotten around to picking a design though my plan is for it to be related to Monty's families heraldry. I've played around with a couple ideas but haven't settled on anything. So far only Augustine has a design settled on (though it could still be subject to change)
#thanks for the ask!!#if this is related to the banner Augustine is carrying in my recent sketch hes holding his own standard#there are so many little details i still need to work out for the various characters
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my babygirl <3
#gepard#honkai star rail#he's my favourite and I'm so happy I got him off standard banner he's been carrying my team so hard lol
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Two is Better than one
I went wild with this one :D
Chapter six
Sasha entered her apartment with the quiet click of the front door. She tossed her backpack onto the chair in the kitchen and started a cup of tea. A clatter from the adjacent room caught her attention. She frowned slightly before peeking her head into the other room.
It took her a moment to process the scene before her eyes.
Micheal was sitting on her living room floor, long fingers carefully curling through the fur of a content cat purring below him. She noted a secondary feline to the left, pawing at a strand of long spindly blonde hair. He glanced at her lazily, tipping his head to the side and humming.
There was only one thing wrong with this picture. Sasha didn't own pets.
"Micheal-what?"
His smile widened. "Hello my dear."
She gestured to the cat now rolling onto its back as Micheal petted its belly. "Where did these come from?"
He looked over at the one still playing with his hair. "They followed someone into my corridors. They followed me here."
Right. Sasha shook her head and sat down, the one on its back stretched out before moving towards her curiously, it had orange hair like a tabby. She pet it and it purred in response.
"Micheal."
"Sasha."
"I don't have the stuff for these guys. I barely have the room, you don't really expect me too-" Her words were cut short as she watched the grey one tangled in Micheal's hair sound out a small mewl as Micheal tenderly picked it up in its hands with too much bone and fingers that stretched too far across. The cat didn't seem to mind.
Micheal hummed as he watched the cat in his arms twist and curl, purring contently as if Micheal wasn't a terrifying monster. Sasha dared to smile.
"I believe, if I remember correctly, these creatures need food, water." He chimed lightly. Sasha rolled her eyes.
"Fine. There's a store down the way from here. They have pet supplies." Sasha sighed as she stood to her feet. "And they are cats, Micheal."
He didn't so much as stand to his feet, rather a blur of motion and colors that stretched out and scattered like sand before he was standing in front of her. "Cats. Yes."
She grabbed her bag and walked towards the door, stopping when she realized Micheal was following her.
"What are you doing?"
"I'm coming with you of course." He giggled, "silly question."
"Right." Sasha smiled, "This won't end badly at all."
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The actual trip wasn't horrible.
Besides the fact that every single dog started barking at Micheal which earned them a few curious glances from the staff, they made it out with a sack of cat food, cat litter, and a box. Even more than she had expected, Micheal paid. Handing the cash to the women as Sasha looked at him with such a confused expression she partially believed he did it just to see her reaction. Laughing as they left the store with the supplies. She simply shook her head.
"I think- he had one."
Sasha looked over at him, he looked, well, human. The way his coat sat on his shoulders and down past his boots, his hands wrapped around a bag of cat food. His eyes trained on nothing before looking over at her with a sharp smile.
Sasha frowned. "Who?"
"Micheal. Before-" His words echoed and trailed off.
Sasha understood. "I'm sorry." The words felt stupid in her mouth.
"Do not be, its-" he paused. "It's a nice memory, I am not sorry to have it, amongst the fractals of everything and nothing and the not-in between, it is nice."
Sasha thought about her question a moment before asking. "What's it like?"
"What?"
"The...what you said about the fractals and the nothingness, delusion...what's it like?"
"It Is Not What It Is and it is a part of me" he said it like a broken tune from some forgotten nursery rhyme. "It is madness- throaty, hollow, the depths of doubt- madness that stirs in the mind. It is not a physicality, but, within it, there is a certain…” He paused. “Ah! Beauty. Like a fine piece of decoration in a mundane hallway." Micheal laughed long and hard as they approached her building.
"You say it's beautiful?"
He giggled and shook his head. "You tell me, my dear, what with your It Knows You, all that knowledge will never satisfy, never relief, you see all and yet-" They entered her house to the two cats scratching up her couch and seemingly content with life. “Madness floods the senses and dilutes the mind, leaving it clear. It changes perception, blinds reality. It's a song sung with all the wrong notes and the wrong tune but it is beautiful nonetheless.” He sat the bag on the kitchen table and she prepared two bowls.
“A broken melody is still broken.”
“Ah, but only you would know if it's broken.”
Sasha paused and stared at him. He was crouched down, pouring the food into the bowl she had provided. It got everywhere and he giggled. Letting out a hummed “oops.” Before moving a long finger to scatter the dropped food even further. His hair cascaded around his shoulders and swept across the floor, the grey cat already taking interest in his dubbed playtoy.
She understood what he meant. And maybe there was a relieving beauty to it. Someone’s only lost if they themselves don’t know how to get to their destination. But if someone is simply wandering, well. There could be a comfort to that. Ignorance is bliss after all. A buzz of muddled headspace that someone looks for within drugs or alcohol. A weight lifted from the mind as it's consumed by something that isn’t tangible.
“Do you understand?” He looked back at her, the pieces of food that had missed the bowl now nowhere to be seen. The two cats had taken an interest in the food and water and were quick to indulge themselves. She looked into Micheal’s eyes, the swirling spirals that seemed to impossibly dilate as he looked at her. He seemed softer, somehow. All folded up and crouched on her floor seemingly as protection to the felines happily eating away. His sweater changed and morphed in color and she half wondered where his coat went. His scarf was wound around his neck and seemed to move like a snake, continually curling over his shoulders. Twisting and bending and pulling in every direction. He was an enigma to look at. Madness. An ever shifting idea that barely took shape before it was changing again. Beautiful. She decided.
He was beautiful.
She almost forgot he was waiting for a response. “I understand.” The words didn’t feel nearly enough. Some part of her reminded herself that she was supposed to be scared of this thing that had casually dropped two cats at her feet like it was nothing. This thing that bought the supplies with money she wasn’t sure he was even supposed to have. This thing that had given her a distorted flower that she still had in the living room. This thing that followed her around with a curiosity she couldn’t explain. This thing that had kissed her cheek instead of killing her when she had been in its corridors. She ignored that voice and instead moved to fix the litter box in the washroom.
Not even an hour later she was curled up on the couch petting the tabby as Micheal played with the gray one on the floor not even a foot away.
“What are their names?” She asked him, breaking the silence that seemed to muffle Micheal’s laughter as he let the cat swipe at his long fingers, pulling them away just in time.
“Names are redundant.”
She rolled her eyes. “I think I’ll call this one Pumpkin.”
He didn’t look away from the cat, letting it catch his fingers and pull them down to bite playfully. Micheal hardly seemed bothered. “Daisies.”
“The cat? That’s a pretty name.”
“No-” He giggled. “I remembered. I was picking them up.” He drew his hand away and pointed at the mess of lines and colors that had once been a flower, sitting in a jar on the coffee table.
Sasha smiled back. “Daisy it is. Pumpkin and Daisy.”
Chapters:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9
#kitsunesakii#not dead yet#can i mention that this is the first series ive ever done that is solely fanfiction?#im genuinely serious#the last time i wrote fanfiction was in a journal and it was for undertale and it was split pov's and id never written anything decent-#-before so it was a huge stretch and id never done anything like it before#then i got carried with hero x villain snippets and they are beautiful bc i love all the possibilities but i still had never actually put-#-down fanfiction on paper and shown it to people#i did a drawn hermione x draco fanfic AGES ago but that doesnt count because it was drawn#but ive never shared with others like this before#my main story is a chapter away from being finished and i have plans for my writing joirney but this has been so therapeutic and amazing to#-write// letting loose and writing the crap ive wished to read (fanfiction wise) has been so relieving for myself// its been so long since#-ive written something just for the absolute delight of getting to read it back#ok done with the sob stories#tma#the magnus archives#micheal the distortion#sasha james#these two#they gonna break the standards i promise#if youve read this far then damn u awesome also if you have a prompt youd like me to try out go on and pop it into my inbox#lord knows id like something other than spam lol#it starts with circles#drink water#chronicles of semi full sketchbooks#love all your art#chronicles of the now#WRITING CHRONICLES
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Tell me of the irma/y'shtola pastabilities.....
ohhhhhh at this point it's public knowledge that irma got a bit of a crush on y'shtola LMAO i'm sorry she's so much her type on every single front that it was unavoidable. but specifically because of that nothing could ever happen because i don't see y'shtola wanting it (from what we've seen, her type is something entirely different). doesnt help that y'shtola was her first contact with the scions as a whole <- her #1 weakness is weird scholarly miqo'te and her #2 weakness elegant competent and bossy older women who don't mince their words so. you understand. she's a bit intimidated by y'shtola still, i think (but who isn't?). i think it's pretty much the textbook case of Workplace Crush actually
#nobody else (except perhaps tataru) among the scions can boss her around like y'shtola does.#it's sort of an inside joke at this point. urianger and thancred exchanging meaningful looks when they see irma following y'shtola#carrying a pile of books taller than she is. you perceive my vision.#it's balanced with the fact y'shtola was the very first SHE ASKED FOR NO PICKLES!! wol rights defender (all the way back in ARR!)#y'shtola definitely sees (well.) it and is vaguely amused i think. they both have too much professional standards & work ethic tho#it's funny because she's by FAR the biggest ship potential (minus g'raha obv) and yet the one least likely to ever happen#irma
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ik it’s probably a classic case of extrapolating way too much but... the way raph’s character design lines up w his whole arc and role and struggles...
like the fact that he is so so so much bigger than the others. raph is big, raph is strong, raph is steady and sturdy and he can literally pick up his entire family and carry them all at once.
and like, when raph is so big and so strong and such a reliable thing. when raph is the protector, the one calling the shots on missions, the mother hen, the first point of authority. when raph is there, overprotective, when raph (for all that his brothers poke at him not being good under pressure) always always ALWAYS comes through at the end of the day when things are serious, ALWAYS gives it everything he’s got.
his design and his learned role/behaviors in this family are just the perfect storm of why it took up to the season finale to drive home the issue.
so much of the series carries the default energy of “raph will handle it.”
raph will hold up the ceiling above you. raph will throw himself over you and take a hit and get back up and keep fighting. raph has a power that makes him even bigger and draws more attention and makes him able to carry MORE. raph will be the substitute parent. raph will be put into the mentor role through leo’s leadership arc.
and raph is big. he’s built to carry heavy loads. raph is strong. raph is bold and loud and always ready to try to push on. even if he doesn’t know what to do or what he’s doing, he won’t give up and we’ll all pull together and things will turn out okay.
(his room is full of teddy bears. he dipped out on a mission to try to take a picture of a pigeon carrying a slice of pizza. he’s terrified of being alone.
he’s just as much of a kid as his brothers are. he’s just as new and inexperienced with the things happening to them as his brothers are. but for him, for some reason, there’s like this double standard where that becomes a huge glaring flaw.)
idk this got very sloppy and uncoordinated. i’m very in my feelings about raph right now though.
#rottmnt#rise of the tmnt#rottmnt raph#rise raph#rottmnt raphael#honestly i could go on forever and ever about the double standard thing where raph is concerned#like. w movie leo especially leo is learning lessons raph also had to learn in the series! making very similar mistakes!#but you never see analyses or essays pointing to those bad calls as signs that leo isn't up to the task...#(i mean there are some clear Reasons why that happens.)#(its the reason why raph and mikey are the bros who get the least content by a MILE. but. not the point of this post.)#the whole point is just the idle subconscious assumption and associations of it being fine to let raph carry everything#literally physically sure but also metaphorically#and the plight of the child who seems to Need Nothing (all children need; some sadly learn not to appear to need)#even my tags are incoherent rn clenches fists i love him so much is all#like there is a reason it takes to the series finale for him to have a proper breakdown and get actual support from his bros#and i am still mad we never got real good content for him and splinter#considering how similar their arcs ARE....#thats a whole other thing whatever
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actually wait. a full cauldron with water is really heavy. dandelion was right to ask her if she needed help. because milva did carry that full cauldron from the river back to the sand on her own. and making this more interesting is that when they have to take it off the fire later, both cahir and regis lift it off together. so milva is as strong as cahir and regis combined? a result of the draw weight of her bow? enough to knock out a man with her fists? i need to see her arms. for science
#constantly biting my lower lip imagining milva barring#the elbow-high diaries#this cauldron had to be big enough to fit a three pound pike and multiple vegetables and small fish#enough to feed five hungry adult people#well four hungry adult people and one presumably hungry adult whatever the hell#don’t make me try to research how large and heavy this cauldron was i dont have time rn… maybe later#all i know is that its already unweildy to carry a standard pot (not even stockpot just pot) from the sink to stove#tbf cahir and regis probably didnt NEED to carry it together but it was for the comfort and friendship of it all ok#like come on you carry that side i carry this side makes you immediately bonded#i love that the audiodrama btw interpreted the inquisitional dialogue to cahir and messing up like ‘nilf… cahir’ as regis’ dialogue#peter kenny put it in dandelion’s voice which was also a valid interpretation and i like how they had a different take here
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tell me the secret to fall in love that easily im 25 and i've only ever met 2 people i would've loved to date the rest are trash-garbage-go-to-hell (aka mean to me for being ugly). none of the two were lesbians btw fuck my life
Honestly I was exaggerating lmaoooo I’m very picky. I’ve felt platonic love for sure (and I’m less hesitant with it) but romantic love is a whole other ballgame and I don’t think I’ve been romantically in love w anyone ever 😍 (also don’t call urself ugly omg be kind to urself)
#My issue is I get very easily icked out but I also refuse to settle#Like I’d rather be single than be w someone I’m room temperature about just to say I’m taken#What kind of life is THAT#My single parent mother’s influence is showing here bc she chose to be on her own over living her life w a mediocre man ultimately#So I carry that energy into all my relationships#I will say I have much higher standards for guys idk why#I haven’t dabbled much into dating girls but I think I’d be less stuck up about it#But my first and only girl crush was soooo gorg that I think I might be incredibly picky there too. Basically it’s over for me
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it's so fuckin funny to me that one of the devs was like "oh the combat in veilguard will be ACTUALLY FUN" like... bitch i LIKED the combat in origins and 2! it was actually fun for me! the issue was that you fucking CHANGED it for inquisition, and now you're changing it again! it doesn't even feel like dragon age combat anymore! what is wrong with you
#origins was my favorite but da2 combat was still like... tolerable at least#and i still managed to enjoy it y'know#but inquisition completely dumbed down tactics to a point where i couldn't actually effectively strategise#and i fucking hate how they handled the mage skill trees#ik archery was better in 2 and inquisition than it was in origins but like#they could definitely have improved archery without taking away from the mage abilities!#“oh yeah let's completely remove the entropy/spirit/healing trees and expect everyone to be fine with it” please just go die in a hole rn#origins skill trees were my fucking favorite they were so versatile while still being well-organised and the mage abilities were the GOAT#ik some people didn't like origins combat but i think for veilguard bioware could've made like#a standard mode and an advanced mode for tactics and by default it would be set to standard but for those of us who like tactics#we could like go in and toggle the advanced mode and it would be completely separate from the difficulty settings so that if we just want t#have more control over the tactics we totally could. y'know. instead of bioware comepletely overcomplicating the combat#but then only giving us THREE (3) FUCKING SKILLS TO HAVE EQUIPPED AT ANY GIVEN TIME LIKE THE FUCKING DUMBASSES THEY ARE.#LIKE THE WHOLE CONCEPT OF VEILGUARD COMBAT HAS STRAYED SO FAR FROM DRAGON AGE COMBAT IN THE FIRST PLACE. UGH.#oh yeah that's right i got carried away but i do still need to tag this as dragon age lol#dragon age#dragon age veilguard#dragon age the veilguard#datv
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I fear i’m missing Diluc and Gepard, like badly.
#I’m having a nostalgic moment#my first standard five star kings that carried me in the early games >>#Diluc and Geppie i have a typeeee#miss them so badly it has become a dilemma#𝓚ouepium 🧸 .ᐟ
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*slides Studio Orange $15*
Make Milly taller than Vash and Wolfwood in TriStamp season 2
#An extra $5 to make her buff as well#$10 extra to keep Millywood in#and another $15 extra for the whole polycule to be canon tbh#trigun#trigun stampede#tristamp#tristamp season 2#milly thompson#vash#vash the stampede#wolfwood#nicholas d wolfwood#studio orange#i would have hated millywood if i'd actually watched trigun the first time someone showed it to me but i love it now#look they nerfed vash and wolfwood's heights to like normal people tall standards and i hope they dont with milly#let her be big as fuck#my huge wife whom i love dearly#she has to be at least a foot minimum taller than meryl#and she should be buff as well to carry around that fuckin stun gun one handed#anyway these following tags are just to follow up my other tags#millywood#polygun#merylmilly
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I know it's my disorder talking, but I can't help but shake these feelings that I'll never be someone's first choice. I'll never be that important. I'll never be loved simply for being, I have to be useful. I have to take care of my loved ones, or I won't be loved in return.
#wolf.txt#also before anyone says anything no i don't hold my loved ones to the same standard#this standard applies to me and only me#i cannot burden them i have to be strong for them i have to support them and carry them and get them through the daysi cant be weak#im not allowed its not for me there are things expected of me expectations i have to abide by and no i dont know what those specifically are#but they still apply#i have to be useful to be loved. no i dont know why im the only one this applies to#sigh
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