#my quest to find music i like in as many languages as i can is going really well

[bloominskyline]

I got tagged by @parklunas to put the year end list on shuffle post 10 songs from it

thank you!! 🤗

1. Altın Gün - Badi Sabah Olmadan

2. Kazka - СВЯТА (lmao this is basically here since 2018)

3. S10 - Wat Als Niemand Op Mij Wacht?

4. Little Simz, Obongjayar - Point and Kill

5. Gamka - Rūmai Miškai

6. Fontaines D.C. - Roman Holiday

7. Lydia Képinski - Vaslaw

8. Fishbach - Démodé

9. Marina Satti - SPIRTO KE VENZINI

10. Tamino - The First Disciple

I will be tagging @vydumaj @waltzbtf @theghoulishmalady @likesirensinshadows

[doomsdaydicecascader]

wow you’re the first person i’ve seen actually support the retcon, that’s cool

i’ve always been neutral on it but would you be down with explaining your opinions on the retcon?

so my number one feeling is that the way homestuck is most like a game is not in its framing or its many subsystems within itself, but in that homestuck is a challenge to the reader first and foremost. it challenges a lot of existing preconceptions about what stories are, what stories can be.

sometimes this is in some stupid ways, but a lot of the time, it's in very palateable ways. hussie describes stuff like the juxtaposition of the earthbound walksprite panels and hussnasty mode as a "creative power move", something that keeps readers on their toes, something which kind of prods at your expectations and why you have those expectations.

and it helps to ask, what challenge is homestuck presenting to me, the reader, by doing this. this is the repeated motion of homestuck, like. "oh, what, it's insane that there's a whole playable game", "oh, what, it's insane that the fallout and consequences of an entire session of the game is being given in just three walkarounds". rose's arc is a challenge to the idea of a "coming of age" story, how do you come of age into a world where the metrics for growth and maturity and adulthood are denied to you? what if "adulthood" and "maturity" were fake ideas all along? well, if nothing matters, maybe you should have a drink to rest your mind about it.

one of the most direct challenges is the challenge of what death means in a story - there are a lot of stories where death is a bad end for a character. an impactful enough character death can change culture around itself for as long as it remains relevant. but that's not what death is in homestuck. death in homestuck is the freedom from being in homestuck. this is most prevalent with its deployment of gnostic ideas - yaldabaoth's treasure being homestuck itself expresses this most directly. the creator has made a flawed world and encourages the suffering of its inhabitants.

death is freedom from this flawed world, and this is expressed in terezi: remem8er. characters who did terrible things, horrible things, unforgiveable things, can find peace in death.

and i think the retcon is far and away the headiest challenge, the final boss of storytelling in homestuck's terms, because it directly challenges the idea of continuity, which is, by the way, TOTALLY FAKE.

continuity isnt actually real, its a thing youre actively constructing as you read. the drawings, the words, the music, the animation, the gameplay - all these things can help shape the idea of art, but the art itself, that's produced by you, the reader. and i think this is a good time to switch over to talking about the never-ending story for a moment.

the never-ending story is a story about atreyu. he goes on a fantasy quest, one which involves the death of his beloved steed artax, the plight of the world of fantasia, and confrontations with the nothing, this devouring force which threatens to end it. and ultimately, he loses. the forces of the nothing are just too overwhelming for a fictional character to overcome. the stakes are too high, no ending could be satisfactory and not contrived.

but then he doesn't lose.

because the never-ending story, the movie, is about bastian, and the relationship and empathy he builds with atreyu as he follows him on his adventure, and bastian, as the reader, is capable of caring about atreyu and fantasia even as it's been reduced to nothing. and its bastian caring about it, and bringing his own context, his own experiences - the name of his dead mother - to the story, that allows it to be reborn as something that can be completed.

and then he rides on the big luck dragon falkor and barfs on the bullies from the start of the movie.

homestuck is doing the same thing, but filtered through the language of video games. if youre playing ff9 and lose to black waltz #3 or whatever, it's a video game, that's to be expected. just do better next time. you wiped on the trial, it's normal, regroup and pull again. youve got 90 minutes. and in that time, in that regression, you become the kind of person who could overcome that challenge.

and it's a powerful challenge! it's one most readers don't overcome, because they are still stuck in the terms of thinking about things in what they expect out of it, instead of what it is. and this is kind of the core idea of homestuck.

hussie put it the best themself:

Homestuck, as an examination of all forms of creative practice, whether cosmic or artistic, isolates the tension between perfect, celebrated idealization and specific, flawed instantiation. The purity of the ideal is what's initially sought, but the imperfection of the specific is what has true value. Conflict and suffering arise from the guilt and stress associated with overvaluing the former. Deliverance and humanity come from recognizing and embracing the latter.

and honestly, i like what the retcon does for basically all the characters it changes dramatically. people take issue with rose's alcoholism plotline being resolved with vriska_slap.png but i don't really, because rose's alcoholism isn't like, of itself if that makes sense. it's alcoholism as an extension of nihilism, in a way that doesn't reflect real alcoholism, but it doesn't have to. s'a story. things can mean things nonliterally.

and vriska regresses as a character, but i think this specific regression is the core of homestuck. you get the platonic ideal of vriska-ness, one who didn't see and feel the trauma she inflicted on tavros, one who has completely supplanted gamzee's role as the plot-mover guide in the alpha session. and one who only makes token gestures at reparations and atonement for her misdeeds. one who is still obsessed with being at the center. and between 2016 and 2019, i was so certain that she had died a heroic death in act 7 that it is an immovable core plot point of my own comic.

(homework: why would homestuck call act 7 the rapture?)

and like, those pre-retcon characters literally do still exist, they show up in remem8er. remem8er goes unbelievably hard on giving every single dead character in the comic the best catharsis available to them: deliverance from having to be in homestuck. and i mean that entirely sincerely! the best ending for a homestuck character is not being in homestuck. and that's a tough thing for people to get their minds around.

but again, it kind of comes naturally with taking homestuck as it is, and thinking intently about what it's doing, what conventions it's challenging and how it's challenging them. because sometimes it's deeply stupid (decade-plus of thought on the matter has not made the incest any more palateable or understandable)

but sometimes it's the best shit in the whole world

[demigods-posts]

Reasons why My Grand Plan from The Lightning Theif Musical is an amazing song:

1.) "If you don't go, you'll never know if you'll ever be good enough." She wants to go on every quest to prove that she is good enough because, as a child, she was never "good enough" for her mortal family. They neglected, ignored, and belittled her so much so that even though she's away from that environment, she feels the need to prove herself worthy of remembrance. like, sweetheart, you were already deserving of all things good. you musn't dwell on the opinions of the shitty people in your life.

2.) "Always been a tough girl, 'cause most girls never win if they're polite." I think it's safe to assume that Annabeth stumbled upon this lesson while on the run, before she met Thalia and Luke - and, I don't think the books specified on how long Annabeth was on her own before them. I can't imagine being seven years old and having to find yourself food, shelter, and a place to sleep. I doubt asking nicely got her anywhere, so she had to resort to more intense, manipulative, and violent acts to get by, and that's just so heartbreaking. I have no doubt that even as a seventeen-year-old, she still carries this lesson, amongst many others, with her.

3.) "And someday soon, the world will notice me." I think it's important to note that in the first chorus, she dreams of someone noticing her, but now that hope expands into the entire world noticing her. It's safe to assume her desire to be remembered only strengthen with time, and I think it's amazing that the writers shined a light on it.

4.) "And your stepmom treats you like some freak. And your dad won't give you the time of day. And your mom won't trust you with a quest. So, the best thing you can do is runaway." There are not enough words in any language to express the heart ache and anger that I feel on behalf of Annabeth. I will never understand how Annabeth, even though it's her choice and I respect it, even forgave her mortal family for all of this. This is abuse, and I will defend this girl with my life.

5.) "And someday soon, I swear. I don't know how or when, but I promise you, I'll never be invisible again. Someone will notice me." I am so happy that we can say that Annabeth Chase, indeed, achieved her grand plan of being remembered. She deserves it so much and I hope the rest of her life goes the way she hopes it does.

6.) I also feel the need to add this post here. It goes along with the topic of the song, and, I think, capitalizes on the important role Percy plays in her life. Just felt it was worth mentioning!

Is it clear that I love Annabeth? I think she's legit becoming my favorite character out of the book series. Like, I feel like the fandom often portrays her as this intense, badass warrior, and she is, but often forget to remember why she is that way, you know? Anyway, we stan.

Tags:

[miyakuli]

Roadwarden

I'm a poor, lonesome roadwarden

I'm a long way from home. My footsteps have led me to this mysterious and dangerous peninsula. I've been asked to explore it to find out more about the locals, so that I could guarantee a commercial exchange with my customers. I only have a few days, and my future meetings and decisions will be decisive.

❤ The history of this region is truly rich. Each village has its own history, customs and beliefs, and even its own dialect. So each visit will therefore be enriching as the locals place their trust in me. Each of them has more or less stormy relations with their neighbors, and I'll do my best to manage any conflicts. But these lands also abound in places that are difficult to penetrate or hidden, so I'll need to be patient to reach them, and who knows, they may reveal new knowledge that will help me in my quests. So many things to discover! ❤ My past is my heritage and I decide my future plans for myself. My skills are my own. As for my social relationships, I'll decide in due course whether or not I'll adapt to the person in front of me. I'll make my own choices according to my own morality and circumstances, but I doubt that everyone will come out a winner in the end… even me. Who's to judge anyway? ❤ The landscape around me is minimalist but striking, and I enjoy observing the different architectures and admiring and fearing the nature that surrounds me. Certain things don't always appear in my field of vision, but I can easily imagine their outlines because they've been sufficiently described to me. ❤ Sometimes I close my eyes to appreciate the sounds around me; I can hear the wind blowing, the rivers flowing, my faithful steed grazing beside me, the cries of creatures in the distance keeping me alert…and sometimes silence, which is never a very good sign. I wonder if there isn't a traveling bard, because I often hear soft music above my head, often melancholy but very pleasant. I'm hoping to ease the tension in this place, so maybe next time I'll hear more festive music…

+/- I feel the weight of time passing, I have so little of it given all the tasks entrusted to me, and I have to evaluate for myself the shortest and most advantageous routes to achieve my ends. I've almost become a tactician. However, I regret my arrival in this region, where my physical condition and lack of wealth and adequate equipment, as well as my unfamiliarity with the area, made me waste precious time. It was very brutal and almost punishing. Of course, I could always come back some distant day and be ready to deal with it, but my first visit will always be the most memorable, and I'm sad to leave when I had one of the peninsula's biggest mysteries right at my fingertips. How frustrating. +/- I feel very free in my actions, which are not always dictated by intrusive thoughts. I can ask locals about places and people on my own, just by mentioning their names or sometimes even a simple description…but it seems that sometimes, my field of possibility is too wide to act, especially for people like me who don't master the local language. I don't necessarily have any clues, and my words and gestures will often have to be extremely precise, as any other alternative won't be accepted.

✖ My encounters were certainly significant, but I don't think I'll keep very fond memories of all these people. The atmosphere was always very austere, which I can understand given the tense situation in this region, but I didn't manage to get attached to many people. And even the friendships I made at the time seemed cold and distant. Only Eudocia managed to touch my heart, despite my solid armor, and she'll always have a place in my memories. I hope she's doing well. ✖ I've never been able to maintain a decent level of hygiene throughout my entire journey. As much for my hunger, my clothes and my magic, I always managed to find a good balance. But finding a place to bathe and sufficiently remove the grime from my body was a priori my nemesis. The locals often stared at me with disdain and I too often struggled to gain their trust because of my filthy appearance. I vowed never to set off on an adventure again without first buying a bar of soap! ✖ Even when I was very well armed and equipped, some monsters resisted me because a single choice could be fatal. Losing a big chunk of my armor just because I thought of dodging a monster rather than jumping on it, sometimes undermined my morale, and I admit to having used my "save" spell at times, which allowed me to relive my confrontation. And I don't like to go through all this for a single error of judgement. What's the point if not to strengthen my physical condition and my weaponry…

In the end, my short excursion didn't reveal all the peninsula's mysteries, and I left intrigued, wanting to see more, to learn more. At least my visit brought a little something positive, but unfortunately not for everyone. I'll certainly be back to revisit this faraway land, Over mountains and over prairies, From dawn 'til day is done, My horse and me keep riding, Into this settin' sun.

➡ My Steam page

[aesterblaster]

Hi there! Lovely blog 🥲 I came across a post about Rin (and his jaded side), which inspired me to rant a bit myself. I apologise if this lacks distinctness - English is not my native language, I also write on the bus so it must be worse than usual. Lastly, I don't have the alchemy of the verb so I tend to write more mud than gold lol. Anyways, I'd like to say something about Rin's ego (I'm consciously using arguments that I haven't seen yet, so I'll say very little about Rin's material living conditions such as the role of his age, his personality, the social impact of being Sae's brother etc, his “brother complex”...)

Well, mainly I find there are many parallels to be drawn between Nagi's character and Rin's, especially when it comes to their relationship with soccer (incidentally, the discussion they had at the end of the Manshine VS PXG match highlights their common problem; they have no ego). No… in fact I would say that there is a fundamental distinction between Nagi and Rin (absence of ego versus negation of the ego). I'm going to use schopenhauerian elements here (lightly) by integrating them with Kojève's ideas (the most primitive to the development of his thought on history). I don't think this is Kaneshiro’s ambition (but Schopenhauer (SC) drew heavily on Buddhist (anatman) and Hindu philosophy, so why not...) but Rin deals with the suffering of the world (equivalent here to the abandonment of his brother, who initially served as the pivot around which his reality revolved) by sublimating his own interiority (ego); he erases his 'ego' so as to become a footballer (he disappears in his work). For SC, the aim of the work is to develop an intuition that proposes a division of the world (a feeling of strangeness in the face of the notion of existence), which in itself makes it possible to overcome its absurdity (of the world). Moreover, everything Rin enjoys revolves around the question of the place or confirmation of the self within its realm (horror films = quest to feel/ his favorite music evokes the inability to find one's place in the world + Ciguatera (one of his favorite manga) tells the story of a young hopeless man with no goal outside of getting a bike and his new friends who gradually build themselves up in the midst of adolescence). Besides, in the same way that the abandonment of the Self is achieved through sublimation (freudian) in the work, it is also achieved through "charity" for Schopenhauer, and in some respects we could compare this to Rin's attitude before Sae's return (complacency towards his team-mates’s play style but also the stoic behaviour that emerged following Sae's departure).

It's true that, in the past, Rin undertook every action symmetrically to Sae's (theory of mimetic desire, which partly explains his disproportionate reaction to Sae's new purpose), whether through peer pressure or "willpower", although these dynamics can be criticised, they enabled Rin to situate himself in the world (shared existence creates a sense of belonging). He was the brother of the best (“even if my brother is stronger, he is still my brother, he treats me like his brother, we are equal, perhaps equivalent, we share a common humanity”). Except that this repression of the ego comes into conflict with the desire or struggle for recognition after Sae's return when he challenges Rin's perception of their shared humanity. Sae rejects Rin's humanity by telling him that he didn't see any value in him other than his ability as a player (which Sae doesn't recognise at the time). At this point, Sae imbues Rin with the idea that a being IS based on the object of his desire (to be, you have to desire something that surpasses the "need". A position that Sae continues to defend, particularly when he tells Sendo that his quest was primitive, even animal, so much so that it focused on primary needs (reproduction/affection (family), security (good salary/ position in the national team)... during this exchange he clearly establishes himself as the authentic human (free) being compared to a bunch of animals or sub-humans (enslaved)). One’s humanity (unlike animality, low things) is defined by the victory of conquering the desire of another being (the recurring theme of bllk). Whoever achieves this on his own, is in a sense, the master and the vanquished is a slave (master-slave dialectic), and while the master obtains recognition of his humanity from the slave, the master does not recognise the humanity of the slave.

In this way, self-awareness becomes a function of the other's awareness of us, and Rin integrates (even if he fights against it) his inhumanity (animality, even) and his subordinate position in relation to his brother (he’s the slave). Therefore, they are no longer brothers since they no longer recognise each other as equals. As a result, Rin performs a double negation of the ego (more or less voluntary and/or undergone), first through self-denial (for the benefit of others) and then through non-recognition (Sae’s abandonment). In addition, this could explain his jadedness and the disdain that you pointed out in your susdite post, because the value of the recognition I receive is a faction of the value of the recognition I give to others. In other words, the master gets recognition from the slave but it's not adequate because he doesn't recognise the slave, so the slave's recognition is worth almost nothing (as for now Rin doesn't care about soccer or blue lock, the aristos/master in his microcosm is Sae (Isagi only in relation to Sae) and, as in ancient Greece, the aristoi only recognise each other. In this sense, Rin seeks to recognise his own existence in the approval of his master (someone he wants to be equal to) and not in his work (if we're talking materialism, in Marxian thought, work is a means for man to recognise his own existence in the world in a broader sense, Rin really does live in a microcosm, but that can be explained by other factors) using outdated or even archaic means (for the venerative connotation of the term). It's funny that it's during the u20 match that he thinks it's imperative for him to make his mark on history. Even if I doubt Kaneshiro's qualities in this area, I'm still looking forward to seeing Rin's evolution in the quest for his true "ego" or "personal identity"now that he's started it, and he's wondering (I don't believe in these things but it could be interesting).

That said, I apologise for the length (I did try my best to keep it short), grammatical errors, spelling mistakes and inconsistencies. I only hope that I have been sufficiently comprehensible. Thank you for reading if you happen to do so. Have a nice day 😁

woah this was a full on psych thesis. Thanks! It was pretty long but I do enjoy your points and connections. I def agree that to Sae, Rin is still attatched to sub par desires and his recognition means nothing. I wonder if Sae's edginess isn't fully due to trauma but also realizing how futile Rin's way of thinking is. He just doesn't know how to properly explain it without being rude as hell.

[madaboutmunson]

MadAboutMunson's One Shot Steddie Fics

Fics are below Keep reading :)

Are You Experienced

Summary: Everyone knows Steve Harrington, a local rich kid jock, the previous king of Hawkins High School. He's got it all, money, a respectable family, and chicks love him. He's even spending the summer learning what it's like to be a real working man before taking on a role in his Dad's firm because its builds character and empathy. Or is he something else entirely? Is Steve a down-on-his-luck guy, stuck in a job he dislikes because his dad is teaching him a lesson, repeatedly striking out with the ladies, that his co-worker is fond of reminding him about? Under all the many layers and masks, he uses to survive the day-to-day, Steve has secrets. The main one is how passionately he loves music. How it moves him in ways nothing else does, and he's sure no one else could possibly feel the same, until his Mom gives him $50 to spend at the new record store. Tumblr Link Ao3 Link

Never Too Much

Summary: Just a little something that wormed its way into my head, because I just love the whole Steddie having an extra love language of music thing Tumblr Link Ao3 Link

Policy of Truth

Summary: Please read the tags and warnings before reading this one 💚 After saving the world, everyone heads home, but not everyone has a place to go back to. Realising that they potentially could have lost their son Mr & Mrs Harrington, make an effort with Steve and open their those in need. But its not just friendships blossoming at The Harrington's, and soon Eddie and Steve have a secret to keep. Ao3 Link

Eight Frames a Week

Summary: Eddie catches Steve in his glasses one time. Just one time! But that is all it takes for Edward Munson’s brain to spark a new hyper fixation. He must have Steve in glasses, whenever he possibly can, because….well…. 1. He looks cute as a button in his glasses. They are so delicate. Thin golden wire frames and large round lenses accentuate the puppyish nature of his eyes. 2. Steve gets shy about them, which is also so adorable Eddie could spontaneously combust. Tumblr Link Ao3 Link

Keep You From The Cold

Summary: Eddie Munson is finding out that being a Vampire isn't as badass as some of the movies would have him believe. It's difficult enough trying to figure out what bits of lore are correct or complete nonsense, but when he sees his only willing source of nourishment (his boyfriend Steve) is struggling, he decides it's time to look elsewhere for sustenance. Fortunately, Eddie learns there is a very undesirable person in the vicinity, who has very bad intentions towards his very desirable Steve, and he means to put a very final stop to that. Tumblr Link Ao3 Link

Wishin' and Hopin'

Summary: In which Eddie realises he might have some residual power from The Upside-Down and plans to use it in the best way he knows how, to impress the guy he's had a crush on for months Tumblr Link Ao3 Link

Devil Gate Drive

Summary: In which Eddie fixes a spooky campfire story that Steve mis told, sending them on a quest for a wish to be granted. Well, once, they get to Devil Gate Drive that is :) Tumblr Link Ao3 Link

[rocketbirdie]

MASSIVE dump of thoughts about Rebirth. Obvious major spoiler warning for pretty much every story beat aside from side quests. That goes for the compilation as a whole.

Think of this as a collection of what would otherwise be literally hundreds of separate obnoxious text posts. Half-review, half liveblogging. Genuine praises and criticisms interspersed with unhinged nonsense. This post is so long it's making my computer lag, so make of that what you will.

To keep it organized and make it easier to find specific moments, this is split up chapter by chapter. I cover the Zack/Biggs stuff in a separate section just before the final chapter, and then follow up with some miscellaneous thoughts.

I'm not of hardcore OG FFVII faith. I love the original, and I view it as separate from Remake/Rebirth, so I embrace most of the major changes. This is generally a very positive review, aside from a few nuisances *cough cough WHISPERS cough* and only one genuinely upsetting letdown. Rebirth is more than I could ever have asked for, and I can't wait to spend the next 4+ years obsessively gushing about it. And now, without further ado...!

Chapter 1: Fall of a Hero (The Nibelheim Incident)

NAILED it.

Love seeing Cloud's teenage squishiness scrambled together with the Zack mannerisms. Restless as a little puppy! Body language, facial expressions, etc. I wonder if they animated a lot of it with Zack's model first, and then replaced it with Cloud? Modders are gonna have a field day with this when the PC version drops.

Sephiroth really was just Some Guy, huh? It's very refreshing to see him acting fully human for once. Helps sell the catastrophic mental shitshow that ensues.

Horfin' down those sandwiches Strife style

"You went into my room?" "I did..." LMAOOO THE SHAME IN HIS VOICE. Cody Christian doing god's work voicing this sopping wet pathetic mess of a man

Zangan manhandling Cloud like that was NOT on my Rebirth bingo card.

The bridge collapse scene is beautifully expanded upon. Such a delicious moment if you know the real story. RIP Ramirez. o7

There is NO fucking way Sephiroth just... stood there unfazed by waist high rushing water. Y'all have any idea how dangerous just ankle-deep water is at those speeds? At least the generous use of artistic license in physics is established very early on.

Tifa demonstrating incredible self restraint by choosing not to strangle Zack to death at the mako spring. I would have walloped his cocky ass lol

"Such a puppy." We're establishing the homoerotic tension right away as well, thank god.

oooOOOouhh the way you can pinpoint the precise moment that Sephiroth starts to lose control at the reactor. The way he walks up those stairs.......

Mwahaha-ing over the visual parallels. Raising his hand to the candle flame... Jenova's face flickering over his own... wow. Every shot, every angle is carefully chosen. Cinematography at it's finest.

OG painted a picture of "no survivors," so it surprised me how many people seemed to have escaped from Nibelheim. Although, it's not certain what their ultimate fate was. I imagine they did it this way to show that the incident impacted far more people than just Cloud and Tifa. Makes sense, considering "sheer scale of suffering" is a recurring theme throughout the Re-trilogy so far.

Sephiroth's mass slaughter is bone chilling. The music, the tension, the iconic shot of the flames framing his figure. Goddamn. And then there's the poor trooper, reaching out for his mom.........

"Why didn't they just shoot him?? They had him surrounded!!" 1, Fear doesn't give a damn about rationality. 2, It's SEPHIROTH. They were almost certainly correct in assuming that their dinky little hunting rifles weren't gonna do jack shit.

Catch me giggling over the most mundane shit. LOVE the detail of the sword tip clanking on the metal floor as Tifa drags it. I'm obsessed with lovingly crafted, nearly unnoticeable sound design like that.

"Mother, they have come again." THANK FUCK they kept this line. I don't even know why, it just stuck with me so hard from OG.

Not sure why people are cranky that the flashback cuts off. It ends at the exact same point as in OG. That's the point, it's supposed to be frustrating.

Seeing an unfathomable number of dumbass comments going "huh??? why did cloud tell the story all wrong??? that's not what happened!!" Dear Lord Please Give Me The Strength

AERTI!!!!!!! hell yeah

Tifa being proactive instead of stewing in confusion!! Love that for her. But damn it didn't go down well, huh. "I was so happy to see you again, but maybe I shouldn't have been." BIG OOOOOF

OUCH. Cloud. At least take off the pauldron if you're gonna sleep on that side LOL

Chapter 2: A New Journey Begins (Kalm and The Grasslands)

Very interesting news broadcast ya got goin' on there, Shinra...

Kalm is so so so so pretty. Feels like an actual full sized city now! Wish we could have seen more of it at night, like in the OG.

Broden!! I like him. I want the best for him. I know he's fucked. But really, it's cool to see more SOLDIER characters. We get to see Cloud's uh-oh brain static moments from the outside perspective, and boy howdy, it ain't pretty.

Broden says he's "...on your side. Got a contact at HQ." Meanwhile, my delusional ass: CONTACT? KUNSEL? IS IT KUNSEL? DO YOU KNOW SOMEONE NAMED KUNSEL?

Mentioned it in a different post— I suspected they changed the arrangement of Midgar's sectors. Sure enough, it's confirmed by looking at Rebirth's world map. Is this a meta fate-has-been-altered thing, or is it just a curious retcon? Maybe a bit of both?

HOLLOW REMIX HOLLOW REMIX HOLLOW REMIX HOLLOW REMIX HOLLOW REMIX AAAAAAAAAAAAA

Oh my god, her name is CHLOE????????? "Chole" was a typo this whole fucking time???? I can't handle this

NOT CHOCOBO BILL BLINDSIDING US WITH THE CLOUD GETTING DOUBLE PENETRATED IN A NASTY SWAMP SHACK IMPLICATIONS???? HELLO?????????

My sweet son Chadley has returned from the time void.

Ok serious talk. Wtf is up with the audio mixing. Someone gave the thumbs up for this production?! The default music volume is WAY too loud and overpowers voice lines. Doesn't help that Remake's npc dialogue deluge in crowded areas hasn't been addressed at all. C'mon people, you had years to fix this shit. It's a shame too, because I would love to hear all of the beautiful music and talented voice acting, just... separately, please.

The Soggy Strife Agenda is off to a great start!

I know Midgar Zolom was a blind idiot translation, but I dunno man. Midgardsormr just doesn't do it for me. Zolom sweetie come home :(

FUCKING. FUCK. WHERE'S THE LINE. FUCK!!! Apparently Sephiroth Did Not Do This. Goddammit. Fucking blasphemy. Genuinely gutted that they didn't include that line. Imagine if they had pulled that shit with Me Gongaga. Unacceptable.

Chapter 3: Deeper into Darkness (Mythril Mines)

"Enough for her Standard Course twice, right?" keep it up Aerith you're doing amazing :)

Ah, the opening area of the mines has been converted into a museum. No wonder people are allowed to just waltz right on in.

ELENA!! Oooooh I love her voice!! She's got that young overconfident sass. Fits her perfectly. She's got me sweating bullets seeing her kick a grenade around like a soccer ball though YIKES

Those Boulders Are Not Made Of Solid Rock

Not much else to say about the mines. Love when the original version of the music kicked in. Barret and Red's dynamic is so good!

Chapter 4: Dawn of a New Era (Junon)

We just, uh, waiting for the bus there, folks? OH SHIT sorry about the bird of prey thing man, that sucks. Hope you feel better soon

Contrary to maybe popular opinion, but I actually love it when you know exactly what a character is going to say or do next. It means the writers have done a great job at getting that character across. Predictable does not always equal bad; tropes exist for a reason after all.

Under Junon. mwah <3

Priscilla!! Omg she's so cute and annoying. Just how I remember.

Soggy Strife Episode 2. This time featuring an off-putting amount of romantic tension between Cloud And That Dolphin

Lowkey disappointed that they cut the uncomfortably long CPR minigame. Gamers nowadays have no idea how good they have it. Back in my day, we had to give mouth-to-mouth for 5 minutes straight in deafening silence.

YUFFIE!!!!!! Oh my god the leakers weren't exaggerating about the naruto run

Yeah ok just. gonna do some good night crunches. Very. Uh. Normal of you, Cloud Strife. God I love this weirdo

ROCHEEEEE My Boyfriend Has Returned

Aerith and Priscilla doing the arm bump thing............ yeah...........

Yeah you work those tanker controls gay boy. I was really expecting a jumpscare as the tanker lifted up. Would have actually shrieked if Sephiroth was just like "sup lol"

WOW the sister ray!!! Honestly the first moment that made me go "DAMN this is Final Fantasy alright!" What a view.

Glad they kept Junon's silly amount of elevators.

Oh hi Glenn

So Aerith wants to know if there are any good restaurants in Junon. Well, maybe if this guy hadn't been busy barfing in an alleyway....

Gee Tifa and Aerith, it's a good thing you guys practiced your highly choreographed military drill, just in case you ever had to pretend to be a trooper during an inaugural parade. Gotta be prepared for even the most unlikely scenarios! (As a writer, I know how it is with suspension of disbelief. But it's still kinda doofy lol)

That being said, I'd let the commander have her way with me

THE MUSIC

Tee hee omg it's so cute to see Cloud in his element! Look at that boy go. He's so into it. I like hearing all of the Seventh Infantry's interactions, too. Really hammers it in that they're all just normal people with their own worries and hopes.

Oopsie daisy. I am not immune to Shinra Propaganda. Huh. Well done, writers.

THE GLABRESCENT!! EXCLUSIVE CLUB FOR BALD PEOPLE

Awww look at all the 1/35 soldiers! Man. This whole chapter is just one huge love letter to the OG. So much nostalgia, plus so much new exciting stuff. God I could go on and on

This Just In, Entire Junon Nursing Home Full Of Elderly People Dies Of A Heart Attack After Rufus Shinra Decides To Fire The Fucking Cannon

Roche please sign my forehead

Uh oh. Yuffie

Yeah Ok don't mind me, just a SOLDIER 1st Class, protecting these little infantrymen with my life. No parallels to be found here, folks

GENUINELY HONEST TO GOD I AM SO SORRY FOR SLICING YOUR BABY ANGEL IN HALF LIKE THAT ROCHE PLEASE FORGIVE ME. Cloud say you're sorry Right Fucking Now.

Oh good no hard feelings. Well. Actually. Uh

Chapter 5: Blood in the Water (Shinra-8/Ship to Costa)

Oh to be a girl hiding away in a cargo hold with another girl.......

Little bit of Traces of Two Pasts! So Aerith told Tifa about Faz, the weird guy that was a little bit too nice to Ifalna. Apparently Aerith is still shaken up by that. Don't blame her.

Ok. I've been avoiding the topic of Queen's Blood, because frankly, my opinion on it is completely unfounded and irrational. I fucking hate card games in video games that are not supposed to be solely about card games. I can't help it. I'm here for the pretty people rpg and the gut-wrenching t4t heartbreak, not for the Magic the Gathering subplot. Any time this game so much as breathes the name Queen's Blood in my direction, I feel something visceral welling up inside of me. So as you can imagine, The Chapter Where You Play Queen's Blood is not my personal favorite.

But I get it! It's not like there was much to do here in the OG. I like that they went out of their way to flesh the ship out and give it more to remember. And for people who like Queen's Blood, I'm happy for them!!

Silly boy humming the victory fanfare I love himmmm

*wiggles*

Gotta get me one of them bigass cardboard cutout palm trees to put on display inside of my grungy metal hallway. Wow what a vibe

DAMN RIGHT YOU SHOULD DEMAND THE MANAGER, RED

THE MOONWALK SJHSYAFDFKKFFJF oh mny fuckijngh god the terrified kid crying his eyes out LMAOOOOO

Dang It! I wanted to see what Cloud looks like swaddled up in that hammock. Why do you deny me that which I desire. Screw your fade to black.

Good to know Hojo is just as disgusting and disturbing as he should be! Yayyyyy :(

"Holy shit..." YUFFIE SAME????? TITOV BOUTTA BLOW SOME TITS OFF????

YEEEHAAWWWW time for another absolute fucking banger of a Jenova remix!!!! I cannot praise the soundtrack enough.

Chapter 6: Fool's Paradise (Costa del Sol)

Obligatory beach episode

Johnny!!!!! My favorite dramatic idiot with a heart of gold! It's ok babygirl I love your seasmell hotel. I'll stay there anytime.

Cloud acting like that lei is strangling him. Sameeee dude same but no really. This place sucks. Too many people trying to force this poor guy to have fun against his will.

If I have to hear "hang loose" one more time, there will be bloodshed.

I do not trust that man to ride safely and sanely on that wheelie. He can't even walk on his own two feet without endangering every physics object in the vicinity.

Empty materia moment actually made me gasp out loud

AERTI DATE AERTI DATE AERTI DATE AERTI DATE

OUTFIT REVIEW TIME

Cloud's Tits Out: An unusual sight. I feel like he should be smooth under there like Link BOTW. He looks a little too robust for someone who's got Big Oil And Brain Worms In There and hasn't slept in weeks. I appreciate the commitment to making him pale as paper and flat as a board. No top surgery scars lose points big time. I'm neutral about the toes. 4/10

Cloud's Business Casual: Immaculate. Tastefully hideous. That blue is NOT your color, girl. Chocobo imagery is always a plus. Absolutely mystified by the untied capris + 3/4 sleeve scoop neck combo. Pretty sure he's not wearing any socks with those tennis shoes. Sneakers in the sand is a helluva sensory experience for an autistic guy like him, I deeply respect it. 9/10.

Tifa's Frilly Miniskirt: Cute and confident. Split between it being utterly out of character for her, or 1000% perfect for her. The white and purple is a great color combo. Slightly concerned about the structural integrity of the neck strap. Uncooperative hairstyle is understandable but kills the vibe a bit. Jealous of the sandals. 8/10

Tifa's Tie Front: DAMN. Stripes with the collar, black jean shorts, hell yeah. The giant belt buckle is just asking for a nasty burn mark, though. Whatever. She's rockin' it. I dunno man, I'm at a loss for words, you just gotta see it to believe it. 10/10.

Aerith's Keepin' It Simple: Tried and true. Pink always works in her favor. Love the little matching flowers in her hair. The wrap around wallet chain is a welcome sprinkle of weirdness. Otherwise masterfully boring; it suits her city-slickin' down-to-earth attitude. 9/10

Aerith's Floral Cover Up: Classy. Got that Final Fantasy princess look with the ruffled sleeves and the push-up cut. The long skirt is nothing short of perfection. Lovestruck by the splash of lime green with the leaf pattern. Can't imagine how annoying those shin-high sandal straps might be though, that's gonna leave a mark. 9/10

Barret's Bear Wearing A Marshmallow: Pillsbury Dough Man at his finest. Faithful to the original, exquisite in 4K HD. Hoist hook arm adds that extra sailor flair, sealing the look. He's having fun with it, and that's what matters most. 10/10!

Ok back to reality

uh oh.

Yup, somehow they managed to make Hojo even more nauseating than ever before. Good. The more we hate him, the worse it'll sting when he keeps dodging his comeuppance. Hohohohoho.... That's Good Writing, Babie! Twist that knife. Keep us ravenously thirsty for revenge!!

Seen a lot of complaints about the women that accompany Hojo to the beach and shower him with compliments and oohs and aahs. Not sure why. Pretty sure it's heavily implied that they're being paid SHIT LOADS of gil to act that way. It's stated outright that they're working for Mayor Kapono, and it's well established by that point that the mayor is wrapped tight around Shinra's pinky finger.

The moment that beach fight started, I knew right away... GRAB THAT UMBRELLA, DO YOUR LEGACY PROUD

Aerith showing her vengeful side, just a tiny bit. So much pent up hatred and grief. Love how it mirrors Cloud's character. She's so forgiving, she doesn't know how to turn anger into action. He's so caught up in his anger, that he forgets what forgiveness could do for him. Man. :'(

Yuffie joins the team!!! Cloud's just like. >:/ lol

Chapter 7: Those Left Behind (Corel)

Fun time is over folks

Huh. Forgive me if I'm mistaken, but that's not even close to being a Weapon. Major retcon, or legendary fakeout?

Sighh... Aerith looking up at the sky like that... The longing sure is long isn't it

WELL! Ain't that the dolly zoom of a lifetime! It's absolutely wild to watch Cloud's mental state worsen gradually in real time. Seeing him almost walk off a cliff was freaky. Good stuff

I WILL LAY DOWN MY LIFE FOR CLOUD JUNIOR

Poor Barret...... damn dude. The people of Corel were nasty to him in the OG, but they cranked that up to eleven in Rebirth. Wow.

"She your new wife? Well good for you..." istg i'll reach through that screen and choke you out with my bare hands bitchass

"NO." Well that settles that! Gee I wonder why Cloud's not interested in helping out the doctor with his test...... hmm......

Yuffie honey... read the room.........

Chapter 8: All That Glitters (Gold Saucer First Visit)

And now for a jarring tonal shift! Yeahh... this game suffers from awkward pacing. A lot. Though I do suppose that's the point— hellish suffering juxtaposed with distasteful extravagance, just how Shinra prefers it.

Dio should snap him in half like a twig. I think it would be good enrichment for Cloud.

Ok. I'm pretty sure this is like. the fourth time Cloud's pupils have gotten all blown out upon seeing Sephiroth. There may be a clinical explanation for this, but there sure as hell ain't a straight one. The submissive little gasps are NOT helping.

I'm fucking pissed on behalf of anyone who has to stay the night at this dumbass hotel. Oh my god. How could anyone fall asleep in this obnoxious hellscape.

At least the receptionist looks good tied up and struggling ;)

Cait Sith meowing his own theme song is doing something unfathomable to the part of me that almost became a furry back in middle school. Oh god no he's so adorable. I'm screwed

I'm going to dismantle that tonberry robot bolt by bolt.

Aerith and Cloud commentating the races omg kicking my feet like a little schoolgirl i love them so muchhhh

The bike minigame is just not the same without Roche's "encouragement"

Jessie 😭

Ok I'm glad that it's made clear from the get-go that Barret isn't responsible for the shooting, and he also doesn't try to take the fall for Dyne. That left a bad taste in my mouth in the OG, so this is a welcome change.

Cait Sith is a little bit too enthused about the muggin' maimin' and murderin' lmao

OH MY GOD CLOUD. Baseball bat to the back of the head was genuinely shocking. As if he didn't have enough brain damage to begin with D:

Oh yuck. Gus is insufferable and nasty. I've known this guy for all of five seconds, and I already hate his guts. Fantastic characterization right outta the gate. The music is hilarious.

Billy???? How the hell did you end up here????? Kid you GOTTA get tf out of this place

LMAOOO Elena is my favorite turk confirmed. "NO VANILLA."

Oh man. Dyne time. This entire part is so damn good. Barret wants so badly for Dyne to be the beloved friend he used to be, but he's just way too far gone. So much resentment and grief.

Second half of the Dyne battle is a little bit weird, but I can tentatively accept it.

Was definitely wondering how they would handle Dyne's suicide given the teen rating. They circumvented the issue by having Shinra troopers gun him down in a crazed last stand. Different from the OG, but still believable and well written, considering their limitations.

Now that I think about it, this game is REALLY pushin' it with the teen rating. I'm willing to bet the rating boards were like, "yeah uh we can make an exception. it's FFVII we're talkin' about." Still... wonder why they couldn't go as far with Remake.

"You carry that guilt... That weight..." Wow. That line.

Annnnd jarring tonal shift! Robot frog fight versus the comedy relief villain. To be fair, I can't think of any other decent place to put this boss, either. On the bright side, Anuran Suppressor is awesome. Favorite fight in the game so far!

I need this soundtrack in my possession right fucking now.

Oh hi Glenn

Chapter 9: The Planet Stirs (Gongaga)

dune buggy :)

Oh Yuffie... just keep a barf bucket on hand or somethin will ya?

"I just... I feel like I've been here before." Well wouldja look at that... no jenova static...

Going over the hill and seeing the reactor... damn.

CISSNEI!!!! Ouuugh girl you know EXACTLY who tf he is, don't lie.

Noooo give Cait his little mushroom back you meanie :(

Ah. The deranged picnic music.

Gongaga has a much different vibe than it did in the OG. The intense feeling of mourning and hardship is missing. No hazy purple hues or Anxiety playing. Seems like they went in more of a CC direction, with the bright blue sky and uplifting soundtrack. Can't lie, I'm a tiny bit disappointed; I was really hoping for something more heavy and melancholic.

The existence of ordinary chickens in the FFVII universe has some frightening implications for the true nature of chocobos. If you have ever kept backyard chickens, you'll know what I mean.

Ohhhhhhh.... Zack's home............. :((((((

No. No. Don't play Sky Blue Eyes. Don't fucking do this to me. I'm gonna fucking cry. Oh my god no.

"They do say no news is good news, right?" I'm gonna do it.

You know shit's bad when even Cloud "I'm Fine" Strife admits he needs to have a lie down. Yikes.

Man, I really wish we knew more about Tifa and Aerith's chats. Dramatic irony's a bitch.

They sure went all out with the mushroom thing, huh. I know they were trying to differentiate Gongaga in terms of gameplay and worldbuilding, but I feel like they went a little overboard. Gongaga was its own unique thing in OG, not sure why they felt the need to quote unquote improve upon it. Just kinda weird.

Now the reactor is a different story. They did an incredible job here. The scale of the reactor, the unprecedented destruction—

Oh God Damn It The Whispers Are Back

Seriously trying so hard to justify in my own mind why the whispers are here. I don't despise them as a concept, but their implementation is awkward and overdone. In the Gongaga reactor, they fulfill the same narrative purpose as the black robes would: to facilitate the Reunion by mentally dragging Cloud along. Sigh... I get it's because they want to familiarize the player with the whispers in anticipation of future scenes, but it still pisses me off.

That being said, the whispers' theme goes HARD and I'm elated to hear it again. It also fits super well in the Gongaga reactor. So I guess I'm not that pissed.

Touch Me renamed to Amphidex. Can't have shit in Gongaga :/

ooOOOOO!!! The mako fumes getting to Cloud's head! Poor guy's about to pass out. Nice touch.

Sephiroth/Jenova taking advantage of Cloud's mako poisoning... Oh man... the instant change in demeanor is nuts. So fucking good. Here we get to see the first time that Sephiroth has total control over Cloud, and it does not disappoint. Ruthless.

Tifa honey how and why tf are you keeping it together right now. Girl, you do NOT have to fix him. You do not have to show him your boobs a second time. You do not have to take a single thing he says seriously. You can just get up and leave I promise he's doomed by the narrative until further notice 😭😭😭

Telluric Orca Vore Moment was also not on my rebirth bingo card but Okay

Teasing the lifestream. Sure, I can get down with it. Just... y'all got a bit of a whisper problem down here. Want me to call pest control?

"No! Don't take him too!" Damn...

I would not feel safe alone in a room with a man who just tried to kill me, let alone even remotely consider intimacy, but maybe that's just me. It is refreshing to see Tifa and Cloud actually talk things out for a change.

Cloud knows there's something wrong with him and he's so scared... man :'(

What does Aerith say to her???????????? ARRRGHHH

So we're all just perfectly fine with Cloud continuing to be in charge? Nobody's got any objections to that? Alrighty Then

SURPRISE Cid Highwind!! Leaks were right, he's cleaned up. No cigs, less swears, very friendly guy. Not as off-putting as I worried it might be. I'm convinced it's just because he's got a business to run— we'll see good ol' cranky Cid in part 3.

ROCHE NOOOOOOOOOO DON'T!!!!!!!! :(

Chapter 10: Watcher of the Vale (Cosmo Canyon)

Red's real voice reveal! Red's real name reveal!! Though I really would have preferred to see his name change to Nanaki in the menu and subtitles...

Cosmo Canyon is coming off as a hippie stoner tourist trap. Yeah all of these people are correct about the planet and the lifestream, but dang if it doesn't feel like someone's about to heckle me into buying healing crystals and dreamcatchers.

The nostalgia is A++. Beautiful remaster of the music, too.

BUGENHAGEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WOOOOOO!!!!!!! SO jealous of him zoomin around on that sick af crystal ball. Screw the Costa wheelies, I want one of these bad boys.

...A legendary fakeout in the making, I think!

The observatory is stunning. Can't even put it into words. The planetarium brought me to tears, it's such a flood of nostalgia and a deeply emotional scene. I love the nice detail of the planet being different from Earth— mako tinted oceans instead of deep blue. Watching the model planet rot and crumble broke my heart.

Sobbing the whole way through Aerith's speech. My god. Poor girl. Knowing what her fate is in the OG makes it hurt even worse.

Gi Nattak. Would

Expanding upon the Gi. Unexpected but super cool. Their story reminds me of FFIX, with the parasitic planet Terra lurking deep within Gaia. The Gi and the Cetra seem to have something similar going on. Who was here first? It almost sounds like the Cetra and their lifestream are invaders.

I could easily relate to the Gi's opinion, that the endless cycle of the lifestream and the persistence of the spirit is tantamount to torture. Never being able to truly rest in peace sucks. Don't worry friends, I'll bring you the black materia! :) (THIS USER CANNOT BE TRUSTED WITH THE BLACK MATERIA)

Aerith sticking her hand into the mako..............

Chapter 11: The Long Shadow of Shinra (Nibelheim)

The intense gaslighting about Nibelheim was one of my favorite things about the OG. It also helped seed even more doubt into Cloud's existence as a real person, setting up his descent into madness over the black materia and vulnerability as Sephiroth's puppet. So the changes they've made to Nibelheim in Rebirth are... unnecessary, to put it lightly.

The villagers do not argue with Tifa or Cloud about their memories of the town. They greet them and tell them all about the town's development into a mako poisoning treatment center. Sigh... Part of what made OG's Nibel revisit so dreadful was the unshakeable feeling that you are not welcome there, and that you're being watched like a hawk. I feel a little bit too comfy here in Rebirth Nibelheim, with how friendly and open everyone's being.

Love the chat with Tifa in her old room. We get so much insight into her thoughts and feelings about Nibelheim, Avalanche, and about Cloud and herself.

"Every time we made eye contact, you'd look away. And when I tried to talk to you, you'd ignore me." ouch, don't gotta poke him in the autism like that

Ohoho. The hotel's digging up some memories. I've said my piece.

dillydally

LORD have mercy. This boy's noodle is scrambled like you wouldn't believe. Good news, he remembers Zack, sort of. Bad news, he thinks he fucking drowned?!???? It's intimidating to see the lengths Jenova/Sephiroth will go to to obscure the truth from Cloud. Damn.

Ok Yuffie is actually starting to get a bit obnoxious. Please stop interrupting emotionally charged moments. We get it, you're excited about materia. Cut it out.

If I were Tifa I would be shitting my pants terrified right about now. Girl I do NOT know how you're holding it together.

And now for the most distasteful tonal shift and momentum killer of all time. It's silly kitty cat hijinks time!! ...What the actual fuck. I like Cait Sith, but this is unacceptable. The basement is supposed to be a sickening place of fear and tragedy. Turning it into a cutesy little box chucking playground is downright disrespectful to the original FFVII. I can't even believe I'm writing this, it's so absurd as a concept. This is the only major change that I'm legitimately seriously upset about.

And by god does it drag on. Every time you think, surely this is the final section!... nope. It just keeps on fucking going. Fuck my life, my blood is boiling. Unreal. Remake's slow ass hand-crane highway thing is nothing compared to this. I'll take a Queen's Blood tournament and a hurricane of whispers any day over this unrivaled masterclass in unnecessary bullshit. Fuck.

At least to some people, the reward for getting through the Cait Sith Crate Slog is worthwhile— a few cutscenes starring Vincent Valentine, and a battle against Galian Beast. But if you're like me, and you're not utterly obsessed with Vincent Valentine or Matt Mercer, then by this point, you're just feeling drained and disappointed.

Overall... least favorite chapter. Mellow start, juicy build up with great potential, completely shafted by baffling nonsense.

RIP Roche. Heartbreaking. It's been a good run. Side note, Roche's conversion into a black robe was... quite bizarre. That's just, uh, how that works, I suppose? Okie dokie then

Oh hi Glenn

Chapter 12: A Golden Key (Gold Saucer Revisit)

Always felt weird about the Gold Saucer revisit in the OG. Unusual pacing. Well, at least Rebirth's being consistent in that regard.

What's the point of the theater if you're just going to do a VR performance instead? I know it's a silly little nitpick, but I wanna hear some soles squeaking on a hardwood stage!

Ah, that's the point of the VR. So Shinra can use a dead woman's likeness to keep selling tickets to their overhyped shows. Surprised none of the characters say anything about that, given Avalanche's well-established anticapitalist message.

This is what Genesis Rhapsodos decided to hyperfixate on? No wonder the guy's hair started turning grey and falling out in chunks. [SARCASM]

Barret sobbing uncontrollably, right next to Nanaki looking like a rejected Crash Bandicoot reboot clapping his paws together. Sums up this entire game so far.

The "audience participation" in the play is altered significantly from the OG. It's, uh, very neat and tidy. I strongly prefer OG's hysterical secondhand embarrassment and awkward ad-lib.

I NEED to know what happens if you fail all of the QTEs. Please tell me it goes off the rails and Cloud gets booed off stage PLEASE.

Pretty song. But my god if that is Not What She Would Sound Like.

The gondola rides!! Overall fantastic. So difficult to pick a favorite. Tifa's is obviously phenomenal, but I think I still have a soft spot for Aerith's. I like that Barret's is taken more seriously; it's such a heartfelt moment. Yuffie reminiscing about Zack was adorable, as well as Cloud relating to her being bad with feelings. The Cait Sith/Cid/Vincent one had me laughing out loud, it was so stiff and awkward lmaoo

THE SCOTCH AND KOTCH DISS TRACK IS SENDING ME???????? SKSJKHAGAAAFDSDSDHHBFD I'm so happy to see these freaks doing their thing again.

RUFUS SHINRA?????

Yeah, no Cait Sith, you ain't garnering any pity from me. Not happening after the crate incident.

Chapter 13: Where Angels Fear to Tread (Temple of the Ancients)

So the temple is to the north now. Understandable, since that's where the Forgotten Capital is, too. Still took me by surprise. Also means we won't be going back to Gongaga... aww :(

HOLY FUCK the way the temple assembles itself... now THIS is what I'm talkin' about!

Teasing us with that fractal square symbol since all the way back in Remake...!

Roche....... "my... friend..." :(((((((

These troopers are NOT getting paid enough for this shit lmao

Oh howdy there Rathalos from Monster Hunter, you look a bit different than I remember

Thank goodness the Cetra had the foresight to incorporate some aesthetically appropriate rest benches into their temple's design!

Aerith's seance + the camera angle of the whole team watching... beautiful nod to FFX...? <3

That better not have been Kunsel.

Reno jumpscare

Elena's pretty pink pistol with the charms and stickers is so goofy. I love her. Hopefully Cloud won't try to chop her head off within the next sixty seconds or anything like tha— uh, nevermind.

oooOOURGHH Cloud is SO fucking terrifying throughout the whole temple. Cody hitting it out of the ballpark BIG TIME with the voice acting. DAMN.

Everybody but Cloud has memories to retread... broke my heart. Sad and scary. By the way Hey uhh Temple? Why the fuck would you do this to us? :(

ugly sobbing

Followed up by the Gayest Thing I Think I've Ever Seen In Video Game History

YOU! WITH THE WING!! GET DOWN HERE!!! YOU'RE UNDER ARREST!

Oh god no you're going to make me fight Demon Gate aren't you

THERE'S TWO OF THEM??!?!?!??!?!!! AAHGAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!

HORRIFYING BUT RELATABLE, CLOUD

Wait. Cloud. Hey. Can we talk about it for a sec. Come back please

"There's no point fighting over a fake." WHOA I actually straight up forgot about that twist! Hell yeah! What a wham line!

"I wish I hadnae skipped leg day." pFFFFT LMAOOOOO

"Yeah... I'm good." The Fuck You Ain't

PHHWAAHH HE JUST GETS CRUSHED AWWW!! RIP LMAO WHAT A WAY TO GO

The temple's transformation is breathtaking. And that music score, too, holy fuck.

Honestly I'm not even mad about the whispers being there, they're just a setpiece at this point. Adds to the frantic atmosphere. I'm choosing to ignore their narrative relevance until absolutely necessary.

ROCHE? YOU GOOD THERE BUDDY?

THAT BOY on his hands and knees SCRAMBLING for that black materia. Gayass

CLOUD AARHGRFGGFFFFF OHHGGHH SEPHIROTH HAS COMPLETE CONTROL OVER HIM HHHAAAAAA!!!!!!!!

OUUGRRHHHH OAWWWWGGHH

LISTEN. Listen I cannot formulate coherent thoughts about this. Go see it for yourself. Just go.

tee hee hee he's so proud of himself handing it over :3

It Begins.

Interlude. The Zack Moments so far:

Yeahhhh not a huge fan of Zack just dropping Cloud off at the nearest recognizable npc. Not after he almost gave his goddamn life to protect him.

MAN! Finally get to see what it's like to enter/exit Midgar. No fade to black, just on your feet and out the gate. Feels good; kinda surreal honestly. Never realized how bad I wanted this.

Regardless of what you think about the Zack thing, you gotta admit, the atmosphere during his sections is ethereal. So beautiful and calming in such a tragic way.

Love how he fights different than Cloud. Throwing punches, brutal kicks, shoulder checks, much like in Crisis Core.

HOLY FUCK don't mind me just gonna uhhh rip this five hundred pound metal post out of the ground and chuck it like a toy hammer. Suddenly the Buster Sword doesn't seem all that unwieldy.

......RIP Barret, Nanaki, and Tifa. Oof. What a way to go out.

DON'T MAKE MY SWEET BOY CRY LIKE THAT FUCK YOU!!! :(((((

Damn bitch you live like this??? To be fair, that's probably the most luxurious resting spot he's had in literal YEARS. Like wow there's a mattress!! And a roof!!!!!

Good to know that Cloud's goofy ass flinging himself out of bed straight into a combat stance thing from Remake is actually a Zack mannerism lol

Ohhh... my heart... seeing things from Cloud's perspective... I like the how this expands upon what the OG established, about "dreams" of this type. Sort of like the sleeping forest scene. Also makes Aerith's resolution scene in Remake all the more curious.

Aww... walking out onto the balcony and seeing the whole garden dead...

Obsessed with the music that plays during Zack's sections. Wow.

Awwww Marlene and Zack are such a silly duo :')

Biggs wtf did you do????????

Ziggs crashing hard onto my list of OTPs. Oops.

Divine intervention preventing a headshot? I'm sure some CS:GO players can relate.

Biggs' and Zack's conflicting memories of Cloud, plus the "broken internal clocks" is intriguing.

"Zack-of-all-trades" tickles me :D

All of their dialogue together is so self-aware... two characters who have had their narrative purposes torn out from under them, desperate to find a new one. The fact that there is no reason for them to be here is the whole point.

"We're all headed for the same place. You'll see your daddy and Tifa again." Oh ok yeah sure go ahead and rip my heart right out of my chest Elmyra

"Hello in there..." 🥺

So Remake Aerith bestowed memories of her future death upon Marlene. Is childhood innocence a prerequisite for this ability to work? Seeing as she did something similar with Nanaki. Otherwise, you'd think she would try to entrust her own fate with someone more influential, like Tifa or Barret.

I cannot fucking believe that Zaclerith endgame is real. Am I dreaming

Aww Zack has Aerith's ribbon tied around his hand...

Chapter 14: End of the World (Forgotten Capital/Final Chapter)

Ok Tsengru shippers. I finally see it. You are 100% correct about them.

Now we're getting WILD with it. The timeline shenanigans are in full swing. Speculation aplenty ahead.

"...or 'homeward bound' maybe?" Still trying to make sense of what exactly these sky-rift worlds are. Aerith's line here seems to imply that this is some kind of purgatory...? Where timelines go to wallow in their death throes? That's my understanding, so far. Especially with all of the mournful npc dialogue.

Aww... Aerith's date with Cloud mirroring the one she had with Zack in Crisis Core :')

I tell you what, the Stamp figurine made me GASP. So that's three timelines now. Beagle, Terrier, Spitz.

So Terrier Zack goes to Hojo in hopes of finding a cure for Cloud. Not his finest idea... but oh well. Jealous of his motorcycle. ;)

Sephiroth is combing timelines for one version of Aerith in particular...? Am I on the right track here? Is this the same Aerith from her resolution scene in Remake?

THE PUG made me spit my fucking drink out. Hot damn, there's four! We saw this timeline's conception in the form of the bright flash of light when Terrier Zack chose to go to Hojo.

So Pug Zack instead goes to Biggs at reactor 6. I really, really love this scene. The pump is dry, the planet's life is flashing before its eyes. A heartfelt moment shared between two characters who have had their narrative purposes torn out from under them. Zack gets a delicious bit of character progression, wanting to take back control of his life. Price of Freedom playing in the background has got me wailing like an air horn.

"I'm sick of taking its shit!" WHOA Zack swearing caught me way off guard. He flees from battle for once, instead of facing Shinra head on in this timeline. Wonder how that'll change things.

"You don't look like you're on a date... More like 'at a funeral.'" Mhm. duly noted

Give it up for timeline number five! Corgi Zack is sitting on the stairs at the church.

"Cloud, Biggs, or Aerith... How the hell am I supposed to choose?" You don't have to, darling. It's called a polycule.

Sephiroth slashes a hole in reality, and the black whispers drag Corgi Zack through it. Starting to think I shoulda done my Lifestream Black/Lifestream White homework.

So far, Aerith+Cloud's date "dream" has taken place entirely in the Spitz timeline. It's not clear if this is also true of the scene inside of the church, especially since Sephiroth comes waltzing in after we just saw him outside in the Corgi timeline. I'm getting the impression that time and space are a very hand-wavey thing in this layer of reality.

HEART EXPLODING GHAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And now for one of the most exhilirating things I think I've ever seen in MY LIFE.

"Behold... The true nature of reality. When the boundaries of fate are breached, new worlds are born. The planet encompasses a multitude of worlds, ever unfolding. [...] In the planet's embrace, all life is as one." Sephiroth's entire dialogue here... I got goosebumps. That's all.

"Very poor form." LMAO

I notice now on my second watch through, that as early as the sleeping forest scenes, we're cutting back and forth between two different timelines, I believe. Whenever the black or white whispers rush past, we shift perspective from one timeline to another. Pay close attention. Two worlds, simultaneous, but different.

Cloud delivers the white materia from one Aerith to another. Is this the same white materia we see from the beginning of Rebirth? I don't think she swaps the materia out, just transfers its power into her own empty materia, then hands Cloud the newly empty one.

Interesting! Looks like the timeline had already split, all the way back when Cloud handed over the black materia. Previously we saw Cloud and Aerith fall, but now— the white whispers rush past— and we see him rescue her and pull themselves up before they fall. Interesting!

Some youtube theorycrafter will piece together the symbolic significance of literally every tiny detail in this prerendered cutscene and make perfect sense of it. Looking forward to it too, because this is WAY above my paygrade.

Hello, whiper pest control services? Hi, yes, I would like to know why the white whispers are suddenly getting in the way? I thought they were my friends :(

Aerith's prayer :(((((((((

OHHGH MY GOD fucking legendary use of the haptic/adaptive triggers. Holy shit.

👁️ 👁️

Meanwhile, Zack Fair

me, banging my fists on the table: KISS! KISS!!! KISS! KISS!!!! JUST KISS ALREADY!!!!!! KISS!!!

Lmao Zack is so indifferent to this interdimensional insanity. After being the protagonist of Crisis Core, he's just like "lol whatever this is fine"

"Look at you takin' charge! I like it!" 😏

Zack+Cloud synergy attack!!!!!!! YES!!!!!!!

"What in the hell is going on!?" SAME ZACK, SAME

AERITH!!!!!!!!!

OH FUCK IT'S THE SONG

the hand hold 💔

i'm incoherent. i'll figure out my thoughts about this some other time

Oh hi Glenn— OH SHIT??!?

THE SWORD CAN DO THAT?????? what

Man... the in-game skybox does NOT do that rift in the sky justice. Absolutely staggering in the final prerendered cutscene.

Next time I have a migraine aura, I'll be at ease knowing that it's just the timelines rippling and merging. No big deal

Two separate worlds, one where she lives, one where she dies. Realities overlapping and intertwined. Cloud's fragile mind fluctuating between both… wow. Can't wait to see where this leads in part 3.

Misc. thoughts, not chapter specific:

Love the accentuated mako in SOLDIER eyes. It irked me that the iconic mako color was so muted in Remake, so seeing it so vibrant in Rebirth is sexy as hell.

Um. No comment on Glenn, really. I'm not heavily invested in his story; maybe I'd be more interested if SE had actually done anything substantial with First Soldier and Ever Crisis. I don't mind that he's here, and the Jenova/Sephiroth twist was pleasantly surprising. Matt and Lucia name drop was also a nice touch. It's pretty obvious that the only reason Glenn is here is to help set up a confict against Wutai for part 3. Fair enough.

So no Kunsel? *SMASHES PHONE ON THE GROUND* *CRUSHES SKATEBOARD*

[lumine-no-hikari]

Dear Sephiroth: (a letter to a fictional character, because why not) #40

Unexpectedly, I was out and about almost all day today.

I went first to the place with all the nice people. I brought the candied orange peels to share with everyone. The leader spoke today about the importance of being kind and welcoming to everybody. The notion of being inclusive and doing right by our fellow man instead of just paying lip service to love was spoken on. The balance between knowing that we are all scarred from life and also knowing that we are still indescribably beautiful was spoken on. The balance between knowing that we must be held accountable for our mistakes and strive to do better while also knowing that we are all inherently lovable and good was spoken on. Afterwards, the lovely gentleman who plays piano began to play a couple of different songs from Undertale; when I gave him the music box, he excitedly asked me to send along to him some video game song that he could learn to play. I had trouble deciding, so I made a list. You can find it here; maybe you'll enjoy some of these:

Since I only sent it to him yesterday, I wasn't expecting to hear any of what I sent today. Nonetheless, I was surprised and delighted to hear His Theme from Undertale being played on the piano! I was so moved that my eyes started leaking the water that I drank before leaving the house this morning, hahaha!

I was confused when he seemed ashamed of the few mistakes he made as he played. Mistakes are the natural result of effort; when the results of that effort produce joy, awe, and wonder without anyone getting hurt in the process, how can we spend so much energy focused on nitpicking how that effort was executed?

It's similar to watching someone who speaks a second language be ashamed of their accent; how do they not realize that the fact that they can even speak a second language at all is already amazing? Why focus on the accent instead of on the fact that you have the power to speak to so many more people, and on all the effort it took to get to the point that you can do such an incredible thing?

So the man who speaks music sometimes gets an, "I'm doing this on the fly to make someone else smile because I'm brave enough to do this unrehearsed" accent. It means that he might have to endure a harsh inner critic to put this smile on my face. How can I look at that and be anything other than awestruck? How can he look at himself and be anything other than awestruck by the kaleidoscopic vibrance of his own existence?

But then I realized that I fall into similar traps all the time; I lose track of "good enough" in my quest for "flawless" more often than I'd like, and sometimes the paralysis from this stops me from trying things in the first place.

Here's the thing, though: one of the most wonderful aspects about being alive is the fact that things don't need to be flawless or even complete for them to still be beautiful and perfect just the way they are. I wish that this was a thing that more people understood. I wish that this was a thing that I could understand better when it comes to myself or anything I do. I'll continue to work on it until I know it in my bones; it's important.

We returned home briefly, but then went out for pizza. It began to snow quite heavily outside along the way. I don't really like the snow, because the snow is cold and the cold makes my entire self hurt (for me, being touched with an ice cube hurts more than being burned on the stove), but I have a feeling that you might enjoy it, so after we returned home from pizza, I went right back outside to snag a few pictures for you. Here they are:

I hope you'll pay special attention to those last few photos. I hope you'll see that the snow angel with one wing is just as lovely as the snow angel with two. I hope you'll see that the one-winged snow angel still has a place beside the snow angel with two.

I hope you'll see that you don't have to be flawless or even complete in order to be lovable, worthy, and good just as you are. Because I'll tell you a secret - not a single living creature is flawless or complete, and that fact about us is the thing that makes us ALIVE.

Think about it - a thing that is already flawless and complete never has to learn, grow, or change. Only dead or inanimate or static things fit that description. Do also consider that it is in the learning, growing, and changing that we are at our best and most beautiful. It is within our flaws and shortcomings that we are perfect. The love that exists within the struggle to endure the necessary pain to become kinder, gentler, and more loving for the people around us is where we are the most perfect. We are at our most perfect when we are overcoming destructive childhood conditioning. We are at our most perfect when we are treating someone with love even as we are gently holding them accountable for their mistakes. Without our flaws, these things wouldn't exist. The capacity to strive to choose love over annihilation or oblivion would not exist. Light cannot exist without darkness to compare it to. We need both sides of the coin for our little pocket of SOMETHING in the vast sea of NOTHING to continue to exist. And that coin has to SPIN - CONSTANTLY - if it stops moving, it falls over, static, inanimate, lifeless, dead.

We are all works-in-progress for the entire duration of our existence - no matter how many fancy (or not-so-fancy) meat-mechs we cycle through. We spend all our time learning, unlearning, falling down, getting back up, being stuck in place, moving forward, getting hurt, being afraid, and loving things and being brave anyway. We are all prismatic contradictions woven together into a thermodynamic miracle, and somehow we still have the audacity to believe that we are ordinary or powerless or less-than-beautiful. If you look at that from the right angle… it'd almost be comical if it wasn't so sad.

It's almost like… like watching butterflies believe that all they'll ever be is primordial soup as they chill out in the darkness of their cocoon, not even able to fathom that the soup is necessary for the next step, not even able to fathom that there will even BE a next step. It's a little silly like that.

And when we're done, we return to where we can remember all we have been so we can incorporate what we've seen into the bigger picture. And when we go back to start a new cycle, we forget it all once more so that we can begin again, washed and fresh, with new and curious eyes, no matter how many cycles we've gone through before. And if that's not the most beautiful, refreshing, and perfect thing there is, I don't know what else it could be.

Here is another example of an artist who wraps up what I clumsily tried to say quite nicely. This one says it better than I can, and thankfully, this one is still alive:

I… think I will end this here. I feel a terrible, terrible headache coming on. It's gonna get hard to think soon. Maybe I'll just go to sleep.

Hey, stay safe out there, okay? You haven't tried everything yet. Please remember that you're lovable and good, even if you might not always feel or act in accordance with that fundamental truth.

I'll keep writing to you. Every day.

Your friend, Lumine

[momental]

Comic Jacqueline Novak is known for wearing the same outfit for her solo show 'Get on Your Knees.' The outfit consists of a loose gray T-shirt, jeans, and white-and-gray sneakers, which provide her with anonymity, neutrality, and comfort. While the show is part standup act, part coming-of-age story, and part philosophy lecture, it is also an athletic feat, leading Novak to often wear a sports bra. However, she has grappled with the belief that she shouldn't wear a sports bra because it is too athletic.

The forty-one-year-old Novak has a youthful appearance and a fascination with elaborate skin-care rituals. 'Get on Your Knees' is a ninety-minute show about fellatio, but it goes beyond raunch comedy and explores the limitations of language when it comes to discussing sex. Novak aims to transform the mundane act into a cosmic experience.

According to John Early, the comic who directed the live version of the show, Novak takes something crude and elevates it into a cosmic frenzy. Fred Armisen, another comic and actor, describes the show as good-spirited and suitable for all audiences, including his own mother. Novak's parents have seen the show multiple times, and her boyfriend, Chris Laker, finds it comfortable and has never been asked if it makes him uncomfortable.

Comedian Jacqueline Novak took a unique approach to developing her stand-up show, 'Get on Your Knees.' Rather than piecing together jokes over time, she wrote the entire set in 2017 and asked her Instagram followers if she could perform it for them. She debuted the show at a party in Brooklyn and went on to perform in bigger venues in Los Angeles and New York. The show gained attention from celebrities like Lucas Hedges, Paul Thomas Anderson, and Emma Stone, and even pop-music producer Mark Ronson saw it five times. Novak takes pride in managing every aspect of her show, from publicity to coordinating performances. She even coded a contactless digital program for the show herself. As she prepares for the release of a special on Netflix, Novak is involved in every step of the process, from editing to closed captioning.

Netflix comedian Jacqueline Novak recently discussed her experience creating her comedy special 'Get on Your Knees.' The postproduction process for Netflix specials is typically completed in less than a month, but Novak's special took five months. Novak expressed her gratitude for the support she received from actress Natasha Lyonne, who directed the special. Lyonne looked out for Novak's creative interests and helped her navigate the pressure of being a good student. Despite suggestions to shorten the special, Novak insisted on keeping its ninety-minute length. Novak meticulously worked on the show for years, even stitching together audio from every performance to determine the best version. Novak's attention to detail extends beyond her comedy, as she even seeks the best deals online with high personal stakes. Corresponding with Novak can be challenging due to her meticulous nature. Novak canceled a tour for 'Get on Your Knees' during the lockdown and has eagerly awaited the opportunity to perform it live.

'By the time we spoke, we’d had so many interactions that I felt we had developed a form of intimacy. 'Waking up in the morning, I was almost, like, I don’t know how to be profiled,' she said on the phone to me one afternoon. 'There is no constitution there. I’m dissolute, or something. I was waiting for myself to come into focus enough.'

Backstage at the Cherry Lane in 2021, Novak applied a light layer of makeup and flat-ironed her hair, which is naturally curly. She and her assistant reviewed the guest list. Every night, Novak pored over the list of ticket holders to see who might show up. 'My awareness of who’s in the audience has a profound effect on my internal experience,' she told me. 'I found out this guy from my high school came last night.'

Much of the show centers on Novak’s fraught quest to successfully perform a blow job in high school. She tells the audience about how her field-hockey teammates encouraged the endeavor. At one performance, three women who had played on the team sat in the second row. This added a new layer of prospective humiliation for Novak. 'Even though I reference things that are my own life and literal, I’m, like, ‘How crass if someone from my town or my high school treats it as if I’m just talking about my life. Excuse you? This is art,' she said. 'Of course, it’s not their job to be exactly what I think they should be.'

Shame is the root of most comedy, but Novak prefers to grapple with shame’s more free-spirited and familiar cousin: embarrassment. Her mother, Naomi Novak, told me that one of her daughter’s first words was 'embarrassing.' 'It’s so ’barrassin’,' she would say. In 'How to Weep in Public,' a memoir-slash-self-help book that Novak published in 2016, she wrote, 'Even as a newborn in the hospital, I tended to turn away and bury my face.'

Novak has two older siblings, and she developed an early analytical streak by observing them at home, in Westchester County, New York. Her mother recalls watching Novak’s nursery-school class through a window and noting that her daughter was completely silent; when she got home, however, she recounted every detail she’d seen. One day, Novak’s teachers called Naomi in to discuss a conversation they’d overheard. A boy had asked Novak, 'Does your mother have a penis?' She’d replied in the same blunt but lyrical way that she talks about sex in 'Get on Your Knees': 'No, she has a vagina. But hers has feathers.'

Naomi’s father was a rabbi, and Novak’s paternal grandparents came from Christian families. The clan delights in mashing up the customs of both cultures. 'We’re a family of analyzers,' her father, Greg, said.

As a child, Novak sought attention through performing, even appearing on 'The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon' in second grade. However, as a teenager, she became more scholarly and self-conscious.

Novak's father's reading of 'Think and Grow Rich' inspired him to start his own business and introduced Novak to self-help tools like Tony Robbins tapes. Novak even helped her father start a podcast about Hegel.

Novak's time in college at Georgetown was marked by her involvement in an improv troupe, but she felt self-conscious and found a sense of belonging in her creative-writing courses.

After college, Novak moved to New York and pursued standup comedy while working in advertising. She struggled with depression, which was exacerbated by her job.

After being fired from her advertising agency, Novak moved back into her childhood bedroom and entered what she now calls her 'depression years.' This period has greatly influenced her life and she now prioritizes her physical and emotional energy. Novak tries various products and rituals to combat her depression, such as following a low-carb diet, using a 'vitality swing' for restless-leg syndrome, and experimenting with supplements, THC gummies, past-life-regression therapy, astral projection, energy-healing workshops, and Kundalini-yoga. She also has a unique exercise routine, seeking workouts with a guiding principle or philosophy. However, in the summer of 2022, depression caught up with her again and she even considered signing up for virtual therapy. Novak suspects a connection between her depression and her glucose levels, particularly blaming blueberries for spiking her glucose. This realization leads her to feel humiliated by her efforts to avoid bread. Despite these struggles, Novak's early jokes often revolved around food, with one of her popular bits being about shared appetizers, specifically nachos, and the comedic scenarios that unfold when they arrive at the table.

In 2014, Jacqueline Novak released a comedy album called 'Quality Notions' that would later become the foundation for her show 'Get on Your Knees.' She also wrote a humorous guide called 'How to Weep in Public,' which offered feeble offerings on depression from someone who understood. In the book, Novak encouraged people with depression to fully embrace their feelings. She described it as 'merely a cigarette in the trenches' compared to other books on the topic.

After college, Novak found solace in antidepressants and moved back to the city to pursue stand-up comedy in New York. She became part of the flourishing alternative-comedy scene and formed close relationships with comedians like John Early and Kate Berlant. It was during a benefit show that Fred Armisen saw Novak perform and considered her as a potential opening act. Armisen was drawn to Novak's ability to share observations in a personal and relatable way.

However, Novak faced challenges in breaking through in the comedy scene. Many of her performances were for drunk audiences in small bars who didn't fully appreciate her talent. Despite the obstacles, Novak remained committed to her craft, while her boyfriend, Laker, pursued a more social lifestyle.

In 2017, Novak had a realization that success didn't come from slowly working her way up. Instead, she decided to focus her energy on creating one exceptional piece of work. She discussed this plan with Laker while walking near their apartment on the Upper West Side. Laker recalled Novak's realization that she needed to make one great thing and concentrate on it.

Novak revisited essays she had written in high school and realized that she had always been a writer at heart. She had a deep awareness that her experiences could one day be chronicled. Novak often questioned if she was living enough in the present moment, which she now finds embarrassing. She believed that she should be fully immersed in her experiences rather than nostalgic for them as they were happening.

In college, Novak and Liz Phang bonded over visiting Peter the Great’s cabinet of curiosities in St. Petersburg, Russia, filled with gruesome objects. Phang recalls Novak impersonating fetuses with birth defects stored in jars, showing her creativity. Novak was known for diving into discomfort in her writing, even exploring topics like having sex with someone who disgusted her. Back at Georgetown, Novak continued to write about sex and her experiences. Her essay about blow jobs in high school became the inspiration for her show 'Get on Your Knees.' Novak used clever tactics to draw attention to the show, including involving her friend Early in the performance. The challenge for Novak and Early was finding the right tone for the show, avoiding moralizing or trauma narratives. They didn't want the audience to pat themselves on the back, but rather to engage with the storytelling. One pivotal moment in the show is when Novak is on the brink of her first blow job and she imagines herself as a character in a Vladimir Nabokov story, hoping to make the experience more literary and less daunting.

In 2019, comedian Jacqueline Novak performed at the Cherry Lane theater and caught the attention of scouts from major streaming platforms. Although Netflix initially passed on her, Novak and her agent didn't give up. They invited Netflix's vice-president of comedy, Robbie Praw, to a performance in Los Angeles, which impressed him and led to a deal with Netflix. Novak felt empowered by this success but didn't like being praised for 'finding her voice,' as she believed it was more about finding confidence and tricking people into liking her comedy.

In 2019, Novak and her partner, John Early, moved to Los Angeles and considered their time in New York as a 'rough draft.' During this time, Novak and her friend, Kate Berlant, frequently visited Korean spas in L.A. and discussed wellness and self-care. Despite their initial aversion to podcasting, the two came up with the idea for a show called 'Poog,' which would offer a unique perspective on wellness as a pastime rather than a serious pursuit. The podcast debuted in November 2020.

'Poog' was pitched to various platforms, including Will Ferrell's Big Money Players Network, and ultimately signed with Ferrell's company just before the pandemic hit.

Descriptions of the podcast 'Poog' may seem nonsensical, but it quickly gained popularity and earned the loyalty of fans like Amy Schumer and Miranda July. The show's creators, Kate Berlant and Jacqueline Novak, even had unrecorded weekly Zoom conversations with July during the pandemic. One frequent topic on 'Poog' is the experience of dining in restaurants, which Novak considers the pinnacle of social interaction. Novak, who has a tree-nut allergy, carefully navigates restaurant menus and engages in conversations with servers about food options. During a dinner with Novak, she discussed her allergies and allowed the waiter to select dishes for her, creating an entertaining and empathetic dining experience.

Getting Novak to stay on topic is a challenge, so I gathered most of her biographical information from her family and her book, rather than asking her directly. During our conversation, a comment I made about a recent 'Poog' episode triggered a series of tangents. Novak talked about everything from Tracy Anderson to the death of Guru Jagat, bringing pets to restaurants, chia seeds, a cocktail with pistachios, and even the scariness of waiters.

We eventually discussed Novak's Netflix taping, a topic she had been avoiding since signing the contract. She pondered why she got into comedy and what she hoped to achieve. She had been performing her show in both traditional theaters and standup clubs, but couldn't decide which was better. The Cherry Lane theater seemed 'too precious' to her as a creative-writing major. She then expressed her excitement about upsetting expectations in the lowbrow world of comedy.

During a celebration for the taping of 'Get on Your Knees,' Novak appeared a bit dazed after a conversation with Brie Larson. I asked her what made her feel ready to film the special after years of tinkering. Was it pressure from Netflix? Financial stakes? Exhaustion from workshopping the show? Finally achieving perfection?

Comedian Jacqueline Novak recently filmed her one-woman show, 'Get on Your Knees,' for a special on HBO. Novak described the pressure she felt leading up to the taping, comparing it to the pressure of competing in the Olympics. She had to let go of her fantasies of perfection and embrace the improvisation that comes with live performance.

Before the taping, Novak went shopping for a new pair of jeans because her old ones had deteriorated. She ended up buying so many pairs that she had to transport them in a rolling suitcase. Actress Natasha Lyonne, who directed the special, helped Novak select a pair of jeans to wear for the performance.

During the show, Novak had a moment of improvisation when she absentmindedly tucked her shirt into her waistband. Lyonne, who was monitoring for continuity issues, asked her to untuck it. The crowd laughed as Novak jokingly asked where to start from. The performance took on a new element of improvisation.

Despite the unexpected moments, Novak remained confident and thanked the crowd for their support. She reflected on the nature of theater and how it involves everyone facing one direction while she faces the other.

Source Link: The Anxious Precision of Jacqueline Novak’s Comedy

[sabineelectricheart]

Charlottesville Croissants

Summary: Jamie asks Baxter on another café-hopping journey. He is happy to go along with it.

Rating: K+ - Suitable for more mature childen, 9 years and older, with minor action violence without serious injury. May contain mild coarse language. Should not contain any adult themes.

Words: 1100

Notes: I really like croissants. Can you notice?

If one of her friends or acquaintances of hers from back in Sunset Bird were to describe her, they would probably say that Jamie Last is a sociable girl, kind and excitable. She had strong convictions about the silliest things and that she appreciated good food, both making it and especially consuming it.

Unfortunately for her, she had not made many connections with people in Virginia and, amongst them, Baxter Ward is the one friend she has made so far into her college career that is willing to tag along with her when she goes to a new café or restaurant in town.

"It would be such a shame to move to a new town and not try out all of the cute cafés!"

She remembers saying that exact phrase to Cove the day before she caught her eastbound plane at the end of summer, and it is something she repeated to all of her friends since then. However, no-one really seemed to share her sentiments as much as the equally-strange monochromatic young man did, possibly because they go café-hopping every other day like they are on a mission.

Charlottesville is not well-known for its nightlife or the gastronomic quality of its restaurants, being mostly a small college town with historically-relevant buildings dotted around it, but still, this is where she lives now, so she ought to make the best of it. She is glad to have trusted companionship over it, in any case.

The pair arrives to a small coffeeshop at Main Street. It was small, with only a few tables in the narrow and long space, but the air was filled with a nice smell of cookies, which was a plus in her book. Popular music played in a low volume on the background, not loud enough to be a bother to conversation, but something to make the wait time run smoother.

“How are we feeling this one?” She asks, lightly, to the young man next to her.

He smirked. "Well, this seems like a pretty nice one. It's got that special ambiance."

Baxter only uses that word to tease Jamie, since she has mentioned on many occasions that a restaurant's ambiance is important to her. Though the joke is much overplayed almost a year in, he does not miss the way her expression tinges with slight embarrassment

Oh, how he adores that look!

"Shut up..." She mumbles.

He just chuckles as he peruses through the menu. "My, is this the treatment I get for joining you on your quest to finding the best café in town? I even support this endeavour of yours financially!"

It is true, he does. She does not think she has ever had to pay for anything as long as he is around, which is fortunate, since she is a broke college student and could not afford nearly as much designer coffee as she usually consumes thanks to the bankrolling of the Ward economic enterprises back in Oregon.

Not that it is not a point of contention at times. It is not like she asked for him to do that! Still, she really does not want him to think she brings him along with her plans just because she is broke and he was much too well-educated to let a lady pay her way, along with having the generous capital to back it up.

"Well, you don't have to..." She mutters, feeling slightly guilty about it.

Baxter senses this, his expression softening slightly. He put his foot in his mouth again.

"Well, we all know the real reason why you ask me to accompany you these days, and it’s not my credit card." He says with a smirk.

That look makes Jamie very uneasy. What kind of out-of-pocket shit is this man going to say next? It suddenly dawns upon her, a conversation she had with Francine Second last week.

Francine, sometimes Frankie, was a common acquaintance between Jamie and Baxter. She was a childhood friend of the young man’s, as they grew up mostly in the same small town in Oregon, even though he really does not care much for her. Paradoxically, then, the two girls are closer between each other, often exchanging campus gossip and easy conversation over their common classes.

A few days ago, Jamie told Francine to not come along for their next café-hopping session because she wanted to spend more time with Baxter alone. Because she like him.

Francine would never! She would never, ever betray her friend this way! That woman swore upon her mother’s prized opal earrings that she would never, ever tell anybody about this. Especially Baxter!

Though, one may argue, Frankie had a bit of a habit of saying too much when she really should not. While she would not find herself in a situation with Baxter that would really warrant a concern, since he really did not care for her for reasons as of yet unknown for Jamie, she had certainly let it slip with other common acquaintances of theirs, who had no commitment or incentive to keep quiet themselves.

Jamie had never met the Autumn Gang, as Francine dubbed them, but they seemed like the nosy sort for sure. Not that she can judge, the Summer Entourage of hers is no different.

"Let's hear it then." She finally says, taking a chair on a table and hoping she does not sound as shaky as she feels right now.

"It's because you always over-order and can never finish the food." He responds, the usual teasing lilt in his voice.

Jamie let out a loud and heavy sigh of relief. Perhaps Francine had not betrayed her after all. She is going to treat her friend to some tacos later, she feels horrible for ever doubting that girl.

"Right, yes. You're absolutely correct." She responds finally, sounding far more relieved than she had anticipated. “By the way, I’m ordering one of every croissant they carry here. They made a hell of a case for them online and I’m not wasting a trip. I hope you didn’t have any lunch.”

Baxter, on the other hand, feels more than a little discontent at this turn of events, even if he is still cognizant and cool as ever. Surely, that conversation he overheard between Jamie and Francine had not been a figment of his own imagination?

He calmly sips his black coffee. Oh well, he decides to just watch her basically inhale the strawberry shortcake she just ordered, a small smile gracing his lips. Perhaps he can get her to confess next time. For now, this is enough.

*_*_*_*_*

Our Life Masterlist

[zhuhongs]

also i find it so funny that every language I've learned, most of the new vocab i learn are from music... like when ppl ask me why ive learned (or partially learned so many languages which is up to 4 plus english) so many languages I'm like "oh so i can talk to ppl^^" but thats not true bc i avoid talking to ppl whenever possible bc theres smth wrong with me. the real answer is so i can understand music in other languages.... thats the real truth... my quest for language knowledge is all music based....

[monstermaster13]

Corey and Oats in…

Aiyido’s Surreal Dream Adventure.

Corey and Oats had a very special family member and friend at Nile Road, he was a beholder named Aiyido. Aiyido was pink and round, in addition to this he was very cheerful and lovable despite being part of a race that was known for cruelty and villainous traits, he had one purple eye in the middle of his head and 10 eye-stalks which he used to see all sorts of things, he was inquisitive and also quite talkative, he loved to talk with his friends and had all sorts of ideas, and now he was an eye doctor and also very interested in dreams.

It was very fitting for a beholder to be obsessed with dreams considering he heard that is how beholders were spawned, of course Aiyido didn’t know where he was spawned from, but he knew his mother helped raise him to be a good little beholder. He floated around in the lounge with the duo and Mel one early afternoon while Carmela was on duty, Oats couldn’t help but think of a surreal dream series he had…a series of dreams that took place in locations they had been to or had seen but he didn’t know why they felt so alien in the dream world.

So he galloped over to Mel and he asked her…’Mommy, can you help me find out what my dreams say about me? These dreams are surreal and confusing to me.’ ‘Sure, let’s go into the bedroom and get something to help with our dream adventure.’ ‘Since you’re a beholder, Aiyido and your species spawns via dreaming, how about you come with us?’

“I’d love to, I know all about dreams.”

The duo and Aiyido went into the bedroom and pulled out an item from the bedbox, this item was a special ticket which Oats used to gain access to a secret entrance in the wall which opened up and took them into a special area known as the land of many dreams which had a special selection of places and dreams to jump into. Corey had always wanted to know what it was like to jump into one of Oats’s dreams.

So Aiyido decided to help with this and used his powers to transport the three of them into Oats’s dream, Oats’s dream-world was very pink and elegant and pretty, his house was a huge palace with modernized touches and he had a garden full of flowers. That is when the lovable equine saw his dream self, who was a beautiful equine princess who was loved by everyone…’Oatsie, in your dreams, you are a princess.’ ‘Of course, I always dream of being loved and being pink and beautiful.’

He showed Corey and Aiyido around his dream palace including the bedroom where he showed them his lovely floating bed and his wardrobe filled with costumes, his unicorn family members galloping into the room as they greeted Corey and the beholder. ‘Mommy, are these your friends?’ Prince Whinnius asked. ‘Yes, and I love them.’

Oats trotted around as he performed a musical number about being such a lucky and pretty horse, and Corey joined in. They then were shown into the ballroom where Oats got to dance alongside his dream-self, he whinnied as he saw Andrea complimenting him on his dress and elegant moves. ‘Your dreams are lovely..just like you.’

The dream was everything Oats ever wanted and was going smoothly until a demon horse emerged from his bedroom mirror and screamed at him…’You will never be pretty, you will be nothing more than just Oats.’ ‘So what? I may not be the prettiest horse but I have the biggest heart, you will never have one.’

Oats managed to face the demon horse and confront his fear, he realized that this dream world was a representation of how he felt and his personality in general, the next dream-world they decided to visit was Corey’s dreams…Corey’s dream was like a video game world with levels based on places they had been to.

The two of them and Aiyido bounced around in this strange dream world, completing various quests and getting prizes for doing so. Things took an even more interesting if not bizarre turn when they heard some of the characters speaking in a language that sounded like it was like in reverse as if they were talking backwards, and creatures of all sorts were wandering about including ones with food on their tails, ones that could shoot energy beams and ones that were made out of an assortment of items including music CDs.

Corey couldn’t believe the selection of different monsters on display and he couldn’t believe he himself was the one who dreamed of all of this, he explored and looked around, he saw lots of shops including ones resembling ones Mel had been to previously, he called Oats over and the duo entered the store and explored it. They went up the escalator to take a look at the toy section and they saw all sorts of stuffed toys including TY, Zuru cone animals and plushes of various characters.

“I wish we could buy things here.”

‘That’s the best part of this place, you don’t need money to buy things in this dream shop, you can buy them and/or order them using the power of thinking.’ ‘Really?’ ‘Oh yes.’ Corey and Oats thought about buying some of the toys and within seconds the toys manifested in their shopping bags and they were able to go home with the items.

They explored the store and then they came across what appeared to be a set of steps, along with Aiyido the stepped up the steps, they saw a slide at the top of it and sat down on it, sliding all the down it and into a play area filled all sorts of quirky playroom things to play around with including wall-climbing equipment and a ball pit that they dove into. After that, they decided to pay a visit to one of Mel’s dreams.

In this dreamworld of Mel’s, they were in a carnival that had people in masks and costumes, it seemed to be daytime for the first few hours of their arrival into this world, only for the sky to darken and for the people in masks to turn into actual monsters as it became a horror scenario in which they all had to fight off the performers. Oats whinnied as he felt afraid of what would happen but he used his dream powers to make it so he wouldn’t be harmed and he became a powerful magic user as Corey levitated in the air and became a superpowered version of himself.

Aiyido used his eye rays to blast some enemies as he floated around, after making the way through the carnival they came across a strange set of arcade and casino type games, Oats noticed what appeared to be a few people playing the games which in turn transformed them into Dan Aykroyd characters. One woman, who was a goth/scene type..was getting into playing one of the hardest levels in the game and she transformed into Darren ‘Mother’ Roskow from Sneakers.

After this they took a look at the prize selection before following a path that took them into Aiyido’s dream world, in this dream world the lovable beholder had his own tv show similar to the TV show House but with Aiyido in the lead role, acting as a version of the title character, this version of Aiyido even sounded like the character, which is to say, like he was voiced by Hugh Laurie. Corey and Oats watched as the dream version of Aiyido helped some patients with their eyes and made witty remarks.

They were very impressed with Aiyido’s dream, Aiyido explained to them that the dream powers beholders had were more than just powerful, but also unpredictable, he listed a couple of examples like for example when a beholder dreams about dying they’ll become a death tyrant, or if a beholder dreams of having a birthday they become a cake themed beholder, he also explained if a beholder dreams of itself…another beholder is spawned. ‘Was that how you came to be, Aiyido?’ ‘Well sort of, I don’t know.’ ‘You don’t know?’ ‘Oh yes, I never knew where I came from.’

Corey thought Aiyido’s powers were impressive and he was proud that the beholder had come a lengthy way since he had met the two of them. Aiyido used his powers to help them when they floated over to a dream version of the house in 28 Rosemary Avenue, it looked like it was daylight out but then the sky darkened and turned black as if someone magically used the color fill tool that is on photo editing programs to turn the sky from day to night as the moon rose.

Oats felt a little bit afraid as he trotted carefully up the stairs, holding on as he looked around, everything looked like it normally did, but he went over to the bedroom. In the bedroom something more than a teensy bit unnerving was happening as the wind blew and creepy voices echoed in the background, he saw a version of Mel who was trapped inside the room, this version of Mel couldn’t scream for help but she discovered she could do it once he explained to her how she had dream powers that she could use.

They helped the dream version of Mel break out of the bedroom using some telekinesis, and th duo and Aiyido floated out of the bedroom and into a dream-version of Jill’s room for protection before floating back down the stairs, Oats panicked as he looked up at the one immense window at the top, feeling like he would die if he tried to jump out of it, but he decided to give it a go, and as he did…he found himself being able to fly. ‘Mommy, I can fly!’

There was a tv in the dream version of the living room, Corey flicked through the channels, one channel was showing an episode of Beetleborgs…’Didn’t know Fox Kids made a return.’ ‘Neither did I. But apparently in this dream world it has, and Beetleborgs has gotten a revival here.’ ‘That’s insane.’ ‘Yeah, we don’t remember this happening.’ ‘Didn’t the show end after two seasons because they ran out of footage?’ ‘Yes, that’s what I heard.’

Corey flicked through to another channel, the channel this time was CBBC and it was showing an episode of Goosebumps. ‘Mommy, did you remember having CBBC on tv here?’ ‘I don’t think so, when we had Sky I think it was Cbeebies, not CBBC.’ He flickered through another channel, showing CITV and an episode of Sooty was on. Which was followed by him switching over to another channel, this time it arrived on NBC and an episode of the Tonight Show With Jay Leno was on. ‘Weird, we’ve seen the current run of the Tonight Show over here but we never saw Jay’s one here.’ ‘Would you happen to know about this, mommy?’ ‘Well you know that i’ve met Jay and we met him in one of our previous dream related adventures.’ ‘Oh yes.’

Oats carefully flew through the window and landed on the doormat, Corey and Aiyido followed him as they all glided out of the fenestra, before landing on the ground, they made a run for it with Mel and ran through the street. ‘Whew, that was a pretty out of control dream adventure don’t you think, mommy?’ ‘Yes it was.’ ‘So we have seen my dream world, your dream world, Corey’s and Aiyido’s, where do we go now?’ ‘Well I figure you could all do with a relaxing dream world…so.’

Mel used her dream powers to transport all of them, herself included, to a magical water playarea with swimming pools, spas and places to relax in. She put on a red swimsuit and jumped into one of the pools, Oats felt embarrassed because he didn’t have a swimsuit or bikini to wear but he found a spare two-piece swimsuit in his size and put it on. He got up to the top of the diving board and he jumped off it, performing an amazing set of acrobatic dives as he majestically dived into the pool, Corey joined in by jumping through some hoops and into the pool. Aiyido sat in one of the chairs and watched, taking photos as he did so, and he used his eye-rays to make some colorful displays.

Corey sensed something was wrong as some of the other swimmers were seeing fish-monsters and mutant fish emerge from the water but those turned out to be part of the attraction, so he was relieved to see that nothing was going to go out of control for him or the others. Aiyido got an idea as he saw a waterslide and he laid himself down and slid all the way to the bottom, landing in the pool. They spent a couple of hours at the pools before the duo headed over to the spa with Mel. At the spa, Corey and Oats got special relaxation treatments and Oats even got to have his hooves painted which made him really happy.

They dried off and headed to the juice bar to have some iced tea, and they played around a bit in one of the extra pools, and an hour later Mel told them it was time to go home. ‘Before we go, i’d like to ask, how did you boys like your adventure?’ ‘Getting to learn all about dreams was super fascinating, mommy.’ ‘I agree.’ ‘We all had an awesome look into each-other’s own dream-worlds.’

Oats used the item that had been used earlier to summon up another doorway, this time the doorway took them back to a passageway which took them back to Nile Road, upon arriving back there they told their friends and the staff all about their adventures into their own little dream worlds, the duo gathered up with Aiyido and Mel and some of the other microbes for afternoon tea, within more than a couple of hours later they gathered at the table for dinner.

After dinner, they had a karaoke contest, emailed Jill about their dream adventure, and most importantly relaxed, they listened to music and played games as well. When it was time for them go to the bedroom they followed Mel. Corey put on his bat pajamas as Oats put on his pink nightgown, while Aiyido the beholder put on a pair of pajamas with a D20 dice pattern on them, they picked out a friend to snuggle with them before heading to the bathroom to brush their teeth.

Finally…after brushing their teeth, they played for a bit more..before finally getting into bed an hour later, Corey, Oats, Mel and Aiyido all snuggled up and drifted off, listening to classical music as they had sweet dreams of their unusual but fun dream adventure. Their pegasus bed took them off into a wonderful world full of their own unusual creations.

And so another adventure has come to an end but stay tuned for me including ‘Big Trouble In Little Pleasantvile: A Big Wolf On Campus Adventure’ ‘Pinkie: The Unicorn With The Power of Warmth’, Corey and Oats in…’Corey and Oats’s Vampire Adventure’, the Countdown to Halloween 2023 adventure stories, and of course a special birthday adventure for everyone’s favorite horse.

[rhyske]

Inquisition feels really bloated with so many fetch quests. While I don't mind running around mindlessly and picking flowers and killing mobs, I have the unpopular opinion: open-world games are overrated. I personally prefer the semi-open-world because it isn't as bloated with empty space to run through back and forth in the same way.

Ohh, I also play as a dalish elf, or well I started as a human and got to Skyhold and did a bunch of stuff there and then I started over because I didn't like how the playthrough was turning out ^^'. I'm not gonna lie laying as a human was very boring but they could do better with elves as well, I don't know much about playing as qunari or dwarf but I bet it's at least a little bit more interesting than human.

dragon age 2 had the 'good intentions but a bad outcome' nailed down and I always had to think really hard about my choices. I still had to reload so many times because I fucked it up and I didn't want my companions to get mad at me TT_TT. whenever someone in the inquisition disapproves I don't really care because I don't care about them as a character (except for Varric, Dorian of course ..and Solas based on my playthrough). Dorian's quest with his father was pretty well written. it's obviously a fucked up situation like oof, but his father is there to ask for forgiveness and I can kinda sympathise with that too in a way. it makes for an interesting story and while the choices are so so I guess, it still feels like it has an impact.

my native language is swedish~ it's pretty boring if you ask me because only people from Scandinavia understand and even then its only a little. sweds tend to be pretty fluent in English as well. What is your target language? I've always learnt best from engaging with the language rather than studying it, like watching films or listening to music in that language helps a lot~ I want to learn more languages but we'll see if I find the effort to properly do it hahah ^^ 💜

I agree 100%, I personally hate open world games. Sure the landscape is pretty but it always hurts the pacing. Sidequests tend to be boring fetch quests or something just as forgettable. I tend to immediately lose interest in a game if it's an open world.

As an elf, it just felt like being an elf was forgotten. In Origin it's constantly mentioned. It just felt.... Like an oversight, y'know? I dunno if it's the same for dwarf or qunari, I didn't play either of them either.

Oh yeah, I always tried to have everyone like me for the most part because I liked everyone in 2. And even if I didn't, I still very much felt their presence and their arcs and their dynamic in the Hawke family. People in Inquisition are just kinda....there. No matter how I handle them, it doesn't matter. I stopped talking to most of them and I didn't feel like I was missing anything. Nobody really talks about hanging out in between missions, or what they do really in their own time.

Oh that's awesome! My Japanese teacher in high school, her native language was Greek. Never would've guessed it! My target language is Japanese, and yeah, I've found I tend to learn better out of textbooks too. I think studying the basics helps, but being interested in the material you're learning from is so important. I want to know what it's like to be bilingual! It's a bucket list goal of mine.

[miyakuli]

Citizen Sleeper

Wake Up

Citizen Sleeper is a mix of visual novel and role-playing game set in a purely SF world; you play the role of a sleeper, a kind of humanoid robot with a human conscience, who finds themself stranded on a space station called Erlin's Eye. Your first goal will obviously be to survive, but over time and encounters, you may find a real reason to live and, who knows, even a future.

❤ An immersive and detailed SF universe, in terms of its lore, visual and sound atmosphere, as well as the themes addressed, rather typical of this genre (transhumanism, capitalism…) but always intelligently presented. ❤ Speaking of design, the game is fairly minimalist, but it's enough to immerse us in this cyberpunk world, not only in terms of the station and its varied locations, but also thanks to Guillaume Singelin's splendid illustrations, which give us striking characters with their own identity. ❤ In keeping with this idea of immersion, the soundtrack discreetly but effectively accompanies this universe, with its futuristic, melancholy music and ambient sound effects of the space station life. ❤ The rpg aspect is characterized by dice rolls after sleep cycles that allow you to unlock new areas and perform specific tasks. And unlike a certain Disco Elysium (which still sticks in my craw x'D), RNG is very well balanced, as the success of your throw will depend on your physical condition and energy. And even if your dice are low, you'll always have something to do with them (small numbers can be used for hacking actions, for example). The station may not be very big, but it's vast enough in terms of activities, offering several hours of play to discover all its nooks and crannies.

+/- The story is very well written, the narration is neat and coherent, and I really enjoyed the intimate exchanges between the characters....on the other hand, I sincerely regret that there's still no translation planned. I'm used to playing games in the language of Shakespeare, but let's face it, this game won't be accessible to everyone, as it requires a very good command of English (many highly technical SF terms). +/- While the gameplay becomes very addictive over time (I couldn't stop restarting cycles!!), it also becomes rather repetitive, especially towards the end; if you stay on the station until the end to unlock all the storylines, you're going to spend a lot of cycles just doing activities here and there while you wait for the next quests to unlock (because sometimes you have to wait several cycles to move on to the next stage).

✖ The idea of choosing a class at the start of the game is only of interest at first, because after a while you end up unlocking all the abilities and your specialization no longer matters. Also, the classes are quite unbalanced (the operator is clearly the one to take to advance quickly and efficiently). ✖ Mouse handling, especially when walking around the station, is not at all great. So I switched to the controller, which has smoother movements, but which wasn't always easy to select zones and dialogues (plus you can only use the directional pad). ✖ Basic options are lacking for a game with so much dialogue and several endings; autosave is imposed, so you can't save at a specific point in the game if you want to come back later to unlock other things, and there's no skip for text already read or even a visual indication (like colored text, for example).

Citizen Sleeper is a very pleasant discovery, with a well-developed SF universe into which I immersed myself, although not without difficulty due to a high level of English. If a French-language version were to come out, I'd be delighted to relive this story and its encounters, and perhaps appreciate its subtleties even more :)

➡ My personal VN ranking (in french) ➡ My Steam page

[kilopinbox]

Renpy display menu take a list

Renpy display menu take a list for free#

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The second and later components of the name are the imageįor example, take the image name mary beach night happy. The first component of the image name is called the image Image is shown on a layer, the displayable associated with it isĪn image name consists of one or more names, separated by An image consists of a name and a displayable. If you haven't yet please check out Chapter 1 and Chapter 2!An image is something that can be show to the screen using the show It's ALIVE!! This is the first Halloween Special for the Viridescent Dragon visual novel series! Join Charlotte, Seleste and Dawn as they try to throw a Halloween Party they'll never forget! Original Story and Character Art by me, Kassidie Butler (Viridea) 2015-2016

Renpy display menu take a list for free#

You can download it for free on Gamejolt, itch.io, indiedb, indiegamestand: This is the main reason I place this game under "Unstable" As a warning this game at the most has some foul language, a bit of blood, mild sexual themes and crude humor.Īlso, be careful, as the game can crash when you close it, as Novelty, the program I used to create this game, is still in its Beta stages. This is the second of many humorous and drama-filled chapters to come. With the Violean Royal Guard on their tails, how will they fare in the face of even more threats? Aye, the sea is a very dangerous place. This is the second of my very first Visual Novel series, Viridescent Dragon.Īfter meeting with Doctor Adam Cendrillon, Charlotte and Seleste head off to do a task to retrieve a rare plant with magical healing properties with a mysterious new ally: Dawn Ngo. Thank you very much, and I hope you enjoy the game! Music by Audionautix and AngelHeights on deviantARTīackgrounds edited with FotoSketcher and Adobe Photoshop CC 2015 Original Story and Character Art by me, Kassidie Butler (Viridea) 2015 exe files on something else.Īlso, be careful, as the game can crash when you close it, as Visual Novelty, the program I used to create this game, is still in its Beta stages.

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This game is in 1920 x 1080 resolution, in window mode and full screen mode. This is the first of many humorous and drama-filled chapters to come. Who is she and where did she really come from? The journey won't be easy, as she will have to conquer many obstacles and find out the hidden truths about the world she travels through, the friends she makes, the reigning monarchs, and the deities that are worshiped. I am considering adding choices in any future chapters/stand-alone novels.)Īfter waking up in a forest, meet Charlotte, the smack-talking, amnesic dragon girl who travels with her friends on a quest to regain her memories.

Renpy display menu take a list movie#

(As this is a kinetic visual novel, it is straight-forward and you could just auto-play it like a movie if you'd like. This is my very first Visual Novel, Viridescent Dragon. Featuring innovative comic-style art, with over 200 unique panels, Vera Blanc immerses you in a the world of the supernatural as you play the detective! Will you be able to solve the mystery? The game plays like a visual novel / adventure game with several different paths to solve the mystery, and a collection of challenging minigames. The town's legendary ghost seems like nothing more than a quaint story, but a string of murders and suicides all point to the castle's ghost, and locals are getting scared. In the second episode, our heroine travels to a small village in central Italy. Take on the role of Vera Blanc, a young and beautiful woman with an extraordinary power: the ability to read other people's minds! Daughter of Emmanuel Blanc, one of the richest people on Earth, she left her life of luxury to use her powers to work alongside paranormal detective Brandon Mackey. Vera Blanc is a mystery / detective game.

Renpy display menu take a list serial#

A serial killer is on the loose, and all leads point to a werewolf as the culprit! The game plays like a visual novel / adventure game with several different paths to solve the mystery, and a collection of challenging minigames. In this first episode, our heroine travels to a mysterious town in Germany deep in the Black Forest.

[saucyminxbrainspill]

Broken Things - Chapter 2

A/N: This fic mingles both film and book canon, especially in the area of TIME (i.e. how long it takes to actually travel to & through certain regions during the dwarves’ Quest for Erebor). I vastly prefer the travel timeline in the books to the super-condensed “there’s always someone chasing us” version in the films.

Fandom: The Hobbit (book and films)

Setting: first part of the Quest for Erebor – The Lone Lands (somewhere between Bree and the Trollshaws)

Characters: Fili x fem!reader, Balin, Gandalf, Bilbo, Thorin, Kili, The Company

Chapter Warnings: mentions of grief, naked dwarf ogling, allusion to past trauma

RATING: PG-13 – angst, implied nudity

Word Count: 2835

Summary: Fili thinks he’s found his One in Y/N, a human linguist and healer accompanying Thorin’s Company on the Quest for Erebor. All he wants to do is find a way to confess his feelings and court her properly. But unbeknownst to him, Y/N carries hidden trauma from her past. Can Fili help her overcome her demons and win her heart?

Barely half a day’s ride beyond the village saw the end of tilled fields and farmsteads, and the beginning of woods and wild country. Y/N avoided Fili altogether, riding at the head of the column with Gandalf and Thorin, or in the rear with Bilbo and Bombur, but always several pony lengths removed from the blonde prince and his brother. At first the younger prince tried to tease the elder, wondering loudly and often – much to Fili’s chagrin - what might have happened to alienate their new friend: that is, until he noticed Fili’s sullen glare whenever he spoke her name. Soon, Kili’s chatter succumbed to his brother’s brooding silence, until finally there was no conversation between the princes at all. Eventually, Kili moved up the column in search of more amicable company.

This continued for the better part of a fortnight, while the Company rode on under fair May skies. Apart from the awkwardness between Y/N and Fili (a known fact that everyone tiptoed delicately around at all costs), it was a merry time. The dwarves told stories and jokes as the ponies ambled along, often at the expense of one or more of their fellows. And most evenings after supper had come and gone, they sat around the campfire and sang. Y/N loved these nights best.

Many of the lyrics featured bawdy or comic scenarios, drawing gales of laughter from the whole group. But sometimes late at night, when the smoke from their spent pipes hung over their heads like wisps of forgotten dreams, the melodies turned somber. When the singing shifted into Khuzdul, Y/N sat entranced. Although she understood only a word or two of the secret language, she felt the weight of the music. The deep hum of dwarven voices stirred something within her: age old sorrow and a loss so deep she could feel the ache in her bones.

“What does it mean?” she asked Balin one night after the conclusion of a particularly mournful dirge. He sighed heavily and gazed up at the sky for a long moment before answering.

“It is the Song of Burning: an elegy for the souls lost at the Battle of Azanulbizar. So many of our kin fell before the gates of Khazad-Dum that day. Those who lived were not enough to bury the dead. So we gathered the fallen onto a pyre and burned them, and the smoke of it darkened the sky for three days and nights.” He looked again at the dying fire, and Y/N saw the memory of other flames reflected in his gaze. His next words were so low, she almost missed them. “My father was a burned dwarf; as was Thorin’s younger brother, Frerin. Nearly all dwarrow suffer from that loss. It is likely we will never recover from it.”

Long moments passed in heavy silence as both stared into the embers. Finally Y/N dared to ask the question that had begun to burn her heart. “I would like to learn to understand it. Khuzdul, I mean. I have spent my whole life learning languages, but I know almost nothing of your speech or your people. Could you teach me?”

Balin looked up at her and frowned, studying her face intently. Y/N held her breath.

“We dwarrow guard our ancient tongue jealously and rarely teach it to outsiders, lass. This is no small thing you ask.”

Y/N had expected this, knowing how closely dwarves kept their secrets. She was prepared. She turned a neutral gaze on Balin then spoke the words she had rehearsed. “Among my people, dwarves are regarded as suspicious at best and vagabonds at worst. The elders of my village taught us that yours is a vulgar race, best suited to hard labor and lacking all gentility. I have been watching you all very closely these past few weeks on the road” - Well, one of you more than the others! - “and whether you wanted me to or not I have learned a thing or two about dwarrow.”

She leaned heavily on the last word, then paused to see what effect her speech had had on her audience. Balin levelled a cool gaze at her from beneath his snowy brows, his former vulnerability transformed into a stony mask.  She picked up a stick and began to poke at the fire, avoiding his eyes as she continued.

“Most of my family believe that dwarves are greedy, mean, and incapable of honest dealings. And while you certainly presented yourselves well when we met back in the Shire, these past weeks spent on the road together have revealed your true character.” Pause for effect!

She couldn’t keep the straight face any longer. Looking back up at Balin, she broke into a grin. “My family are all fools. It’s one of the reasons I chose to become a scholar. Traveling in your company for the past month, I have found Durin’s Folk to be kind, honest, and loyal to a fault.” She paused for a breath, decided not to mention the particular Durin who had cemented this impression on her, and then continued. “Despite the coarseness of your manners and your slightly off-color humor, you have treated me with greater respect than my own kin. You have shown honor of the highest quality. And hearing your stories and songs has left me no doubt as to the richness of your culture. Yours is a venerable, noble heritage unrivaled by anything my village elders can boast. My people know nothing. And for my own part, I could never condone the views of such small-minded clodpolls.”

She put on her best pleading face and launched into the finale. “Please, Balin: teach me your language, your history, your stories and songs. I want to tell the world how wrong they are about you. I have become very fond of you all, you know.” Her oration concluded, Y/N sat back and waited.

Balin remained so still that for a moment she wondered if she had gone too far with the insults. Then a smirk appeared on his face and he shook his head, chuckling. “You are a force to be reckoned with, lass. It has been long since I have had to match wits with the likes of you. ‘Venerable’, eh?” He chuckled again, more warmly.

“Aye. I cannot see what harm it could do. I’ll take it up with Thorin.” Then the old dwarf stood, bid her goodnight, and lumbered off in the direction of his bedroll, leaving her to begin the first watch in the company of her own thoughts.

Y/N couldn’t keep the grin off her face. Perhaps Gandalf had been right. Perhaps here, among these fierce, proud, stubborn, fascinating dwarves, she could trust and be trusted. And with trust, maybe friendship would follow. Maybe even . . .

Ghosts of the past flitted about the edges of her thoughts and she shoved them away, pivoting her focus with a speed born of long practice. She gave the fire a few good pokes, stirring it to life and adding more wood. As the flames licked greedily at the fresh log, she raised her head to scan the camp. Most of the Company had taken to their blankets for the night. But just at the edge of the firelight, Y/N caught the gleam of eyes watching her. She stiffened reflexively. Fili’s golden mane shone in the glow of the renewed blaze, even as his eyes snapped shut. She had caught him staring outright this time. She sighed heavily and tried to relax, but the whispers at the edge of her mind would not fully disperse.

Damn the past! Even without it, she had enough to worry about in the present.  

The following day dawned unseasonably hot, and by mid-morning the singing and laughing gave way to sweating and grumbling. Even Gandalf grew sullen (“Well,” said Bilbo testily, “more sullen than usual at any rate!”). By late afternoon, everyone’s neck was sunburned, everyone’s thighs chafed, and everyone’s tempers worn thin. After toiling up a particularly long and dusty ascent, Gloin, riding at the front with Gandalf, gave a shout. The party drew up at the crest of the hill and gazed down upon a welcome sight. A small green valley fell away below them, leafy tree tops stretching away down the slope and sunlight glinting on water at the bottom. The dwarves cheered, and raced down the rocky incline into the shade of the wood, Y/N and Bilbo – whose riding skills were a bit less accomplished - following somewhat slower behind under the watchful eyes of Gandalf and Thorin. By the time the stragglers caught up with the rest of the group, the ponies had been tied up in a circle and already half-unladen, and a campsite was quickly unfolding on the verge of a small, clear lake.

“I guess we make camp here tonight” Thorin rumbled dryly, but Y/N caught the hint of a smile that played upon his lips as he watched his nephews shedding their clothes and weapons in a mad dash to the water. Y/N smiled too. A swim sounded like the best thing in the world at that moment! But – she glanced up just in time to see Kili dive headfirst off an enormous boulder, his chiseled body cleaving the surface with a splash – she would have to wait her turn. While nobody who knew her could call Y/N a prude, the dwarves had shown a deep concern for her modesty and “reputation”, and out of respect and affection she refrained from challenging their peculiar sensibilities.

“I’ll go help Bombur get out the cooking gear” she sighed, angling her pony towards the center of the campsite. But it wasn’t long before Bombur too, in an uncharacteristic display of rowdiness, shed his layers and went roaring off the top of the rock himself, swamping his companions with a mighty wave. Y/N laughed heartily and watched the company members for a moment as they wrestled and splashed; especially the blonde prince as he lifted his brother bodily and threw him off the rock down upon the surface of the water with a resounding ‘SMACK!’ She winced in solidarity, then looked away, smirking to herself as she built up the fire. Just because she had to wait her turn didn’t mean she couldn’t enjoy the view!

Suddenly a shadow loomed over her. “My dear Y/N!” Gandalf’s voice interrupted her colorful thoughts.

“Hmm?” She raised her eyebrows and glanced up at him with an innocent smile. “Yes, my dear Gandalf?”

The wizard’s eyes glittered beneath his hat. “Why don’t you and Bilbo put your plant lore to good use and see if you can’t find something to add to our pot. Hmm?” He arched one tremendous eyebrow knowingly at her.

Y/N grinned wickedly. “Spoilsport!” she whispered loudly, then rose off her haunches and called to the hobbit, “Bilbo dear, Gandalf wants some vegetables for his stew. Would you care to accompany me?” Bilbo, looking uncomfortably hot and a little flustered himself (while he generally didn’t mind bathing amidst the dwarves, the sort of rough play currently churning up the lake made him more than a little anxious) hurried after her down the shore in search of wild greens and edible flora.

When they returned sometime later, arms full of wood sorrel, watercress, and mushrooms (Bilbo was especially proud of the large number of black morels he had found) the dwarves had finished their swim and set up a well-ordered camp. Y/N and Bilbo’s vegetables, combined with a quantity of dried meat, salt, and barley, promised a hearty supper, and everyone’s spirits felt lighter for it. Everyone, that is, except Y/N and Bilbo, whose sweat-damp clothes and burning skin now begged for a dip in the lake. The moment Bombur set the cauldron over the fire, Bilbo scurried off towards the water, now blessedly calm and free of dwarven gladiators. Trying not to look too eager, Y/N gathered her pack and set off down the shoreline away from the others, her mind already adrift on the crystal waters.

“Don’t wander too far, or we won’t be able to hear you and come rescue you if you drown!” Kili taunted her retreating form.

Without turning or breaking stride, she yelled back, “I’m not the one who needs to worry about drowning! Your back flip was a disgrace!” Kili frowned. “That dive was excellent! Where does she get off, telling me that-” Then his brain caught up with her words, and he flushed crimson and began inspecting his bow with single minded focus, pretending to ignore the jeers and whistles of the Company. Fili, however, found their exchange less than amusing. The words “drown” and “rescue” tugged at his heart, and he turned to Thorin where he sat on a log with Gandalf blowing smoke rings.

“Shouldn’t someone go with her?” he asked in what he hoped was a nonchalant tone of voice.  “I mean, at least within earshot?” Thorin raised a questioning eyebrow at his nephew, while Gandalf tried – and mostly failed - to disguise a chuckle as a cough.

“I think,”, Thorin began carefully, “that Y/N is perfectly capable of handling herself in broad daylight, sister-son.” It was true. The sun had lowered towards the tree line, but nowhere near set. Fili could hear Bofur snickering somewhere behind him, and his stinging pride urged him to take a swing at the cheeky Broadbeam. Instead, he nodded curtly to his uncle, who returned the gesture graciously, then went to sort out his bedroll.

Y/N floated on her back, letting her mind drift along with her body in the still waters of a secluded cove. The lake did not disappoint, embracing her chaffed and sunburned skin with waves of cool relief. She knew as soon as the sun dipped behind the trees the temperature would drop uncomfortably, but until that moment she planned to enjoy her swim to the fullest. She gazed up at the cerulean sky, pondering nothing in particular, except maybe how the cloudless blue expanse reminded her of Fili’s eyes . . . She blinked. Then she sighed. Damn it, Y/N! This will not do!

In the days since the market, she had kept her distance from the dwarven prince, unnerved by the intensity of . . . whatever had passed between them. She watched him out of the corner of her eye, trying to piece together how she felt. He was definitely handsome, with his leonine locks, breathtaking eyes, and adorable dimples, and he moved with purpose and certainty: attractive qualities in and of themselves. But she knew from both education and experience that beautiful forms often hide beastly souls. Her thoughts darkened, and she shoved the cloud away with a shiver that had nothing to do with the light evening breeze.

She closed her eyes.

Who are you, Fili? . . .

Not the past. It is dead, buried. It cannot hold me. This is the present. Now. You are here, now.

So, who are you? You are . . .

He was everything she had told Balin last night, and more. Laughter without cruelty. Bravery without bravado. Gracious. Competent. Strong of heart. You love your brother and uncle; will suffer hardship and danger for them. You exude inner light. So different from . . . Her mind reached the edge of an abyss she did not wish to gaze upon, and in retaliation all thoughts stopped. For a handful of heartbeats, she was completely blank. Then she inhaled deeply and repeated the words:

The sins of others do not define me.

The sins of others do not define YOU. The past is dead, buried. It cannot hold me. This is the present. Now. You are here now.

I am here now.

Now, not Then.

Now, not Later.

Now.

But who was he to her now? She had yet to decide. Ever since that unsettling day, despite her intense scrutiny, her instincts remained quiet. She did not sense danger from him, not even a glimmer of ill intent: no prickle at the back of her neck, no knots in her stomach, no urge to flee. On the contrary, she felt an inexplicable desire to get closer to him, to be seen by him. She even contemplated risking the unthinkable: letting her guard down.  

And then there was that whisper of something more: that something in his eyes which had lanced her heart and left her reeling, breathless and astonished.

When he looked at her . . . Elbereth preserve me, those eyes! . . .

Y/N’s heart sped up, and she felt a warmth under her skin that had nothing to do with sunburn or saddle sores. An upwelling of emotions cascaded over her, sweeping away her chronic fear. She remembered how her heart raced when he held her gaze; how her entire body tingled at his touch; how his eyes poured a torrent of questions and feelings into her, unlocking a corresponding flood in her own heart.

She snorted, remembering Kili’s recent jest.

“Who’s going to save you if you drown?” she murmured to the sky.

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