#my mental meme is fantastic regarding that

[whereisthedamndaddymanual]

Man, I couldn't even take my girlfriend shopping in the mall without another girlfriend wanting to join us.

[dira333]

Congrats on finishing Passing Peonies! As you could probably tell from my tags, I'm completely enthralled with it!

I was wondering if you'd considered what Shigaraki would be doing post war? This isn't necessarily a request for the follower milestone (though I do plan on sending in a request or two after I've gathered my thoughts). I was just curious if you'd had any plans regarding him in that universe.

Thank you for asking! I do know what Shigaraki is doing in the Passing Peonies world but I didn't want to convolute the story with too many people to focus on. So glad that I get to talk about it!

Deku managed to defeat All for One and Shigaraki by doing what he does best - get through to Shigaraki and convince him of the power of Friendship. Without Deku's example, Shouto might not have been so successful with Touya.

Not everyone from the League of Villains wanted to change, because not all of them wanted to be heard and understood in the first place.

The Public demanded harsh punishments but Allmight, coupled with Deku "the world-saver" and his friends, demanded a change in the system. Touya, Toga, Shigaraki, Spinner, Kurogiri... They were taken in for physical and psychological therapy. But, and that was important... They were not allowed to meet each other at first. They could ask questions about each other if they wanted to, but people were afraid that it would pull them down and hinder their healing if they were confronted with people from their past.

That did not work as well as they thought they would. Kurogiri almost broke out of the hospital he was in because no one would tell him where Shigaraki was held and if he was still alive.

Toga's mental health improved significantly once she had regular contact with Touya and Spinner was moved to the same hospital as Kurogiri and Shigaraki in an attempt to benefit Shigaraki's recovery.

Touya is the first to actually enter the rehabilitation program of all the villains, because he has the biggest support system: his whole family, plus Hawks.

Toga is second, because she has Touya to rely on, as well as Ochako who never misses their weekly trips to get coffee or try on cute clothes.

Kurogiri could have been the first but he will not leave Shigaraki's side. Him, Spinner and Shigaraki are living in a remodeled three bedroom apartment in a hospital wing.

Spinner is retaking highschool classes and is thinking about working for a mechanic as soon as he's allowed to start rehabilitation - his therapist is still a bit concerned with his obsession with Stain.

Kurogiri has weekly cooking classes with Present Mic and Aizawa which are doing nothing for his memory but they have gotten close.

And finally, we have Shigaraki.

After two years in therapy - at the end of Passing Peonies - he's doing a lot better. He wears gloves all of the time even though he's wearing quirk cancelling anklets and there are days where Kurogiri has to hang blankets over all the mirrors because Shigaraki doesn't want to see himself but he's doing better.

Kurogiri has taught him how to cook and he's making a fantastic fried rice with egg on top whenever Deku comes over (about once a week). Allmight visits him daily - he's at the hospital anyway, so why not? - and some days they spend by reading books together or Shigaraki explaining Memes to Allmight who has to peer at his phone through reading glasses like the old man he is.

Maybe in a year or so he might be able to start the rehabilitation process himself but he's not thinking about that now. He's just trying to get better, one day after the other, and not think too much about the future ahead.

[tirsynni]

I was just reminded of something and thought I should share, although I feel like I’m inviting wrath by doing so:

Always remember that when it comes to mental health, there’s no singular answer to anything. Also remember that, when it comes to mental health, you’re not looking for something which is going to SOLVE your mental health: you’re looking for tools which can help you deal with it. As such, those tools tend to be highly individualized, because mental health is, by nature, highly individualized.

Medication is helpful because it can have a direct impact on neurological/chemical/etc. issues. For some people, it’s a literal life saver. However, for some people, it can be tricky to use or obtain. In many instances, it can help only partially, especially if you are limited regarding what medication you can take and use and access. 

When it comes to mental health, just think of everything as tools in your toolbox. Everyone’s toolbox will look different. I remember a while ago on tumblr (and honestly, it might still be a thing, but I’ve worked hard to avoid unnecessary online stressors) that there was a furious backlash regarding people suggesting things like exercise and meditation to help with mental health issues. Part of the reason for the backlash was idiots pushing these things as a cure, like that fucking meme showing a picture of a forest as medication. There have been so many studies on how being in nature can greatly assist physical and mental health. In some cases, if the mental health issue isn’t because your brain hates you but because your life circumstances suck, changes in lifestyle and being out in nature and such can dramatically help. However, not only is it not an option for people, it is an insane simplification of an issue and ignores the diversity of neurological issues.

(For some people, they reacted so angrily about it because they wanted to minimize their participation in their own mental and physical health. Claiming that medication and medication alone was the answer is a great way to avoid actively addressing the issue. It’s a type of protective helplessness: if the problem can’t be solved or can only be solved in one singular fashion, then they are free from the responsibility of changing their actions/lifestyle/etc. You also see this in people who complain about their phones being monitored but want to keep Facebook/Instagram/Tiktok/etc. apps on their phone because it’s easier. If it’s just how it is, then they are free from personal responsibility regarding the problem.)

Medication for some people can actually solve a problem, depending on what that caused that problem. For many other people, it can be a tool. Exercise for many people, especially individuals with ADHD, can be an excellent tool. Meditation? Diet changes? Yoga? All excellent tools. When someone recommends something like exercise, don’t snap at them immediately. Find out their thought process. If they’re recommending it as a tool, cool! Maybe they’ll have more insight! If they recommend it as a cure? Try to be brave and not smack them. (Unless they have a Nazi tattoo. Then knock them the fuck out.)

As these are tools, though, they can only be helpful if you can use them. For some people with ADHD, running is fantastic. ADHD brains love it! If you have a physical impairment, though, it’s a useless tool and needs to be discarded. Find individualized tools which work for you. Find good resources which offer objective suggestions for tools. My doc recommended the book ADHD 2.0 for me and it was amazing for offering different tools and why they were helpful. Make sure the person isn’t pushing for something, though, and that the person actually knows what they’re talking about and isn’t some variant of a Titktok influencer. 

Does being surrounded by plants help you relax? Great! They’re a good tool! Knowing you need a certain amount of alone time to recharge? Excellent. Add it to the list. Exercise helps but you can only do limited kinds? Figure out what kinds. Gardening? Writing? Whatever. Know what tools work for you.

Also, know what tools, no matter how popular they are or how well they work for others, don’t work for you. Having a healthy diet is awesome! But it’s far too easy for people to make it into a noose. It should be about giving your body (and mind and mood and whatever) what it needs, not as a form of punishment or self-harm. If having a healthy diet helps but you have a history of eating disorders? Then in the end, it’s more harmful than helpful. My body hates medication, so people love suggesting things when I can’t even take Nyquil. There are also times when something is a helpful tool but you have to be careful about abusing it. You need alone time for your mental health? So do I! Having too much alone time opens you up to depression, anxiety, etc.? You need to monitor it.

If possible, try to figure out how much of your mental health problems are based on external factors. Right now, many people are struggling with depression and anxiety, among other things, due to external factors. In some cases, you might be able to address it. For example, is the problem caused by a toxic person you can cut out of your life? Good time to explore how to do so. Is it an economic issue? Might not be as easy of a fix, but at least recognizing the source is helpful. There might be solutions or helpful paths but they’re more long-term than short-term. Recognizing that something is a long-term problem and won’t be solved immediately is a helpful mental health tool: it lets you remind yourself that yes, it’s going to hurt you today and tomorrow and next week and such, but you know that and you know to prepare for it and you won’t be as badly hurt tomorrow when the problem is still there tomorrow when you really hoped that you would wake up in the morning and it would be gone. It lets you build resilience, which is one of the most important mental health tools of all.

Personalize your toolbox. What works for you might not work for others and vice versa. Keep your toolbox up-to-date, as a tool that previously worked might not help now. Be wary of when a tool becomes more harmful than helpful. It is also helpful to make sure you have back-up tools and a good understanding of your resources, just in case. Always remember that just because something is trendy, popular, etc. doesn’t mean it’s helpful. For example, the sheer amount of people who damaged their internal organs, endangered their lives, and endangered the lives of their loved ones because they were anti-vaccine but pro-horse medication.

[sparring-spirals]

I love reading all of your meta and I was curious - what do you think of Laudna’s deal? You’ve noted we have no idea how she actually feels about her backstory, but with her using pâté to do better with eldritch blast, I wanted to hear your thoughts in more depth about Laudna / Laudna using Pâté as a social crutch and/or a mental shield.

Thank you! :D

Oh this is a fantastic line of thought, thank you. I still stand by us not really knowing, (yet). But Paté as a sort of- conduit, shield, processing mechanism- oh that's good. I think you're on to something there, especially wrt using Pate as a distancing + processing mechanism for some of her thoughts and feelings. Not all of them! Not all the time! But sometimes.

Laudna is, for the most part, Vibin. Chillin. Cheerful. But she's not in denial, either- when things are shitty or people are sad, she's one of the first people to be sympathetic, and kind, and acknowledge their sadness and fear and anger. When she's disappointed, she admits it quite readily. This last ep she said, regarding the "difficulties of the world": "We've [I've] had time to process", and I think I believe her.

But I also think something about Pate seems freeing, and safe, for her- as a guarded extension of herself, or a proxy, or a joke, or a barrier.

Symbolism of turning a dead rat into a spot of lightheartedness (as sole company for decades other than a malicious voice in the head) aside: Laudna, when puppeteering Paté, gets to not speak as Laudna, but as Paté. Which can be funny, if you say funny things, and comforting, if you are completely and utterly alone, and safe, if you have some thoughts or some feelings you haven't quite parsed through, that are nebulous or a little intimidating, to chew through, or an impulse that requires you put yourself out there a little.

And like: I don't think that's exclusively what Paté is for, or that everything she says as Paté has to have some deeper meaning, as much as I feel like thats how she intentionally chooses to use him, at least sometimes. And that's neat! The coexistence of Laudna's confidence and the presence of Paté as both personal comic relief and a little pseudo persona that is both her and not. The way Laudna must categorize things, choose to process them, consciously and not, and how Paté factors into that. Whether Imogen hears the back and forths in Paté's accents. So on.

Okay the more I think about this the more thoughts I have so I'm cutting it here, but suffice it to say: yeah that's neat as hell huh?

Also I can't believe Paté is canonically the meme of "sir, that is my emotional support dead rat with a bird skull head".

[breathingwysteria]

Hyperbole & A Half; Illustrated Novels as Gateways to More Traditional Comics

Hyperbole and a Half, autobiographical webcomic blog, turned illustrated novel; One! Hundred! Demons!, autobiographical comic compilation of personal “demons;” both detail the funny, heartwarming, and often ugly parts of the human experience as they unfold for each author as an individual. Both are told in short story form, with an intra-homodiagetic narrator (the author serves as both narrator and active character), accompanied by illustrated panels that invoke a sense of physical and emotional movement that the reader can easily conceptualize. With so many major similarities, why does each work receive such different classifications? What makes a comic a comic and not an illustrated novel? How do these seemingly disparate definitions affect the way we read them? Can illustrated novels be considered gateway materials to comics? I think so. Before we jump into that exact why, let’s look at the defining characteristics of comics.

Text, images, and some semblance of sequential flow in time and space are the most major markers of comics, utilized throughout history, found in ancient work like Egyptian tomb paintings all the way up to modern comics and manga. Speech bubbles erupt from the mouths of static character images, narration is often delineated by straight-lined boxes and a change in tone, real movement through space and time happens in the empty “gutters” between panels. Although illustrated novels and comics are constructed differently, they are still processed in the brain in fundamentally the same way. Children’s literacy researcher, Evelyn Arizpe, notes that when reading illustrated stories, regardless of form (comics or traditional storybooks), “the eye moves between one part of the picture and another, piecing together the image like a puzzle.” If picture books and comics are processed in the brain in the same way, why are they considered different mediums? Linguist and cognitive scientist, Neil Cohn, applies his academic specialties to comics, attributing the difference to things like panel placement and what he calls “navigational structure,” the direction our eyes track when piecing images in a comic together to create a sense of coherence when reading.

Traditional storybooks, unlike comics, typically utilize one image per page to convey everything from character relationships to arrested motion; comics achieve a more fluid and nuanced version of this by using panels as snapshots or windows into character worlds. Where then does the illustrated novel fall between these two states, and where does Hyperbole and a Half land? Illustrated novels rely more heavily on the text narrative of the story and the readers imagination, associated images usually only serve to enhance the story world or solidify ideas and images that would otherwise be difficult to conceptualize or to emphasize an exciting or emotional moment in the narrative. Hyperbole and a Half leans more heavily toward the multiple-panel style of comics to help amplify the narrative. Perhaps this stems from the novel’s genesis as a blog-turned-book. In 2009, Hyperbole and a Half author, Allie Brosh began a blog of the same name, where she chronicled events from her personal life, like the adoption of one of her two dogs; illustrated pet peeves, like the internet usage of “alot,” a misspelling of “a lot,” personified as a shaggy, fang-toothed monster; or her fear of spiders, captured by an image of an oval with spindly appendages replete with strapped-on knives, guns, and a swastika tattooed above the eyes. Brosh’s book maintains the same familiar tone, regularly interspersing images meticulously drawn by the author herself. Her use of illustrated images that convey character motion, emotional state, and even dialogue exchanges are reminiscent of both regular comics and contemporary memes.

In Brosh’s chapter titled “Motivation,” she chronicles her own struggle with self-starting and follow-through. She illustrates a frequent conversation she has between the “her” who knows she must complete a task, and the “her” who continues to procrastinate for no conceivable reason. Instead of floating thought bubbles, she makes this conversation concrete by utilizing a kind of split screen effect,where both versions of herself take up space within the same panel, as does their dialogue.

Most of Brosh’s panels behave in the same way, providing the reader with concrete examples of often abstract concepts, like internal monologue and discussions with oneself.

One! Hundred! Demons!author, Lynda Barry, achieves this same concept by forcefully changing the reader’s perspective. As she reveals the story of her struggle with impostor syndrome as an author and her childhood tendency to let her imagination run away with the descriptions in the Classified section of the newspaper, the reader follows her through her childhood musings and is dropped into the middle of one of her fantastical plots.

Only when Barry transitions back to a narrative focused on her own more present-tense position as a narrator do we as readers get dragged back into the present-past-tense of her childhood self.

Brosh maintains a slightly smoother sense of temporal immediacy by clumping her panels in “Motivation” together, as one “Motivation Game.” Readers are taken along the same journey, into and back out of, the author’s imagination and altered psychological state, but Barry’s follows tactics familiar to comic readers, while Brosh blurs those lines a bit for readers unused to comics.

This difference in delivery of the protagonist’s inner-world carries over into the way dialogue is associated with each character as well. In the above examples, from One! Hundred! Demons!, Barry uses the classic speech bubbles historically associated with comics; Brosh, on the other hand, utilizes both classic speech bubbles as well as free-floating text that the reader infers to be audible speech through context clues.

In the chapter “The Helper Dog is an Asshole,” Brosh retells the story of her and her partner’s adoption of a second issue-riddled shelter dog. She uses both dialogue vehicles on one page, in succession, the traditional speech bubbles allow each character in the top panel to convey separate thoughts, while the speech in the middle panel is only spoken by Brosh’s caricature of herself, as she is the only character “facing” the audience.

Brosh utilizes a similarly comic-style tactic when expressing active motion or a change in mental or emotional state. In “The God of Cake,” she recounts a childhood obsession with conquering her mothers demands that she not decimate her grandfather’s homemade birthday cake with her youthful inability to control her own sugar intake. She masterfully illustrates this rapid descent into the kind of one-track-minded madness only children ever master with a four-page sequence of successively blurry panels.

No, that’s not a mistake of my scanner, it’s printed that way in the book; while a little difficult to read, I think it conveys an emotional whirlwind with an immediacy that helps the reader understand just how much untamed tenacity is bubbling beneath the surface for this child character through the remainder of this chapter.

Another tactic that Brosh employs, that seems like a holdover from her work’s origin as an online blog, is her use of a colored filter over a panel to illustrate distress or another intense emotion. In the same chapter retelling her story of the “helper dog,” Brosh lists the myriad and often confounding behavior issues the new dog frequently displays, like her visceral and adverse reaction to other dogs. Brosh posits that the new dog must simply be unable to comprehend or abide by the fundamental existence of other dogs in the world. To depict the abrupt and unpredictable change in this dog’s mental state, Brosh uses a red tinted filter, along with grumpy-looking smiley faces and hand-written text over her base illustration of her new dog lunging toward another dog in the distance, teeth bared.

You can almost hear the Kill Bill sirens going off in the background.

While Brosh’s artistic approach is reminiscent of internet memes, it also resembles the cartoon-y illustrated style of altered mental states in comics. In One! Hundred! Demons!, Barry juxtaposes alternating bright contrasting colors with radiating squiggly lines in a few of her panels to symbolize the acid trip she and her truncated crush are having on their roam through China Town and Skid Row.

Instead of giving the audience a sense of almost seeing through the perspective of her dog’s psyche, like Brosh does, Barry’s interpretation of her own childhood experience makes the reader feel a little like a sober friend along for the ride, understanding what’s happening, but not able to reach quite the same level of empathy.

Although comics are typically regarded as a reading material relegated to childhood hobbies, books that fall between the borders of comics and illustrated novels, like Hyperbole and a Half, prove their usefulness as a narrative medium, and for readers afraid of being seen reading a full-blown comic—or have never even attempted it, can consider them the shallow end of the comics pool, a lighter commitment than the image-heavy ocean of traditional comics.

Brosh, Allie. Hyperbole and a Half: Unfortunate Situations, Flawed Coping Mechanisms, Mayhem, and Other Things That Happened. Gallery Books, 2019.

ISBN: 978-1-4767-6459-7

[misc-headcanons]

Who are your top 5 favorite BNHA characters and Steven Universe characters and why are they your faves? And who are your top 5 least favorite??

(OOF, that's a lot of writing lol. Just for the sake of brevity, I'll do my top 3 from each show and why I like them 😅)

BNHA

Tomura! I like his design, his Japanese VA is phenomenal, and I think Hori's done a good job of showing HOW he became the way he is without excusing his actions. He was in an abusive household and was then groomed to be AfO's successor, but he did NOT "literally do nothing wrong". Like I say that as a meme bc it's funny, but let's be real he did...a lot of horrible things.

Hawks. Hawks is probably one of the most complex characters in BNHA and every time he makes an appearance, I love it. He has a wonderful design, and he's a character that much like Shigaraki, you can easily see how he became the way he is and STILL, know he's done some horrible things. Horikoshi seems to enjoy these characters who show that Hero society can't function if everyone views it with the black and white perspective of "Heroes good, Villains bad".

Twice. Twice is a tragic character that, although NOT an accurate portrayal of DID or any irl mental disorders, fantastically serves his narrative role. Twice is regarded as a very kind and sweet person, and even if he has a part in crimes like Bakugo's kidnapping and has killed people, he isn't a malicious person that fits the mold of what citizens would think a Villain's like. His struggle with identity and how Heroes just don't save people like him affected me, and it did remind me of how people with mental illnesses in the real world are maligned or even outright ignored if they aren't the "acceptable" kind of mentally ill.

Steven Universe

Rose/Pink Diamond. I immediately fell in love with Rose's design from the first episode, and I like that over the course of the series, the original portrayal of her as a perfect figure and savior is...A) not at all accurate and B) something that Pink probably hated that people thought of her that way. I like that Pink was an immature brat who over time, had to learn that despite being a Gem she had the potential to change. And even though she did mature, she still fucked up...A LOT. And I like that the show, especially Steven, isn't afraid to point out that she absolutely fucked things up and it isn't fair for Steven to have to bear the burden of her mistakes. She's a character I could spend hours thinking about, lol.

Pearl. Pearl's development from the start of the series to the end is probably my FAVORITE character journey in Steven Universe. Aside from that, I love her musical motif and very graceful aesthetic (I always love Pearl-centric episodes just because I like watching Pearl, lol), and DeeDee Magno Hall's performance as her VA is fantastic. I love seeing Pearl, I love hearing Pearl, and I love learning more about Pearl.

Hmm. I love Opal, but she doesn't get much play throughout the series. I'd say either Bismuth or Spinel! Bismuth's actual reveal was nice after years of wanting to know about the bubbled gem in Lion's mane, and I love her design, her voice, her musical motif, and her role in the group. Blacksmith characters are awesome! Also, her fight with Steven and the scene after he stabs her is one of my favorite moments in the series. Spinel's just a fantastic character from every angle I look at: design, powers/abilities, narrative role (as a villain and as a reminder of how awful Pink was, even unintentionally), VOICE PERFORMANCE. I love everything about her, holy shit I love Spinel.

[madcxp]

𝖒𝖎𝖓𝖎𝖘𝖙𝖗𝖞  𝖋𝖎𝖑𝖊𝖘  :  XENOPHILIUS LOVEGOOD  is  a  twenty - one  year  old  muggleborn  .  he  is  currently  working  as  an  intern at the daily prophet  ,  and  is  suspected  of  siding  with  the order.  nicknamed  the  madcap  ,  they're  described  to  be  -  distrait  and  +  perspicacious  .  wherever  they  go  ,  they  leave  the  scent  of  vanilla pudding  ,  half - finished experimental potions  ,  &  dirigible plum  ,  and  the  memories  of  when the moon is visible in daylight hours  ,  freshly shorn strands of flaxen hair fluttering into a bathroom sink  ,  &  an obscure symbol strung onto a glistening gold chain  behind . (  rudy pankow  .  cis male  .  )  | ooc  sam  ,  23  ,  est  ,  she / her  .

hello ! i’m sam and it’s been a loooong time since i’ve been in a marauders rp, so i’m super excited for this and i hope you enjoy my quintessential ‘70s vegetarian hippie !

STATS

FULL NAME: xenophilius ? lovegood ( he’s pretty sure he has a middle name, but he can’t remember what it is. ) NICKNAMES: xeno GENDER + PRONOUNS: cis male + he / him DOB + AGE: october 13th, 1955 / twenty - one ZODIAC: libra HOMETOWN: killarney, ireland OCCUPATION: intern at the daily prophet BLOOD STATUS: muggleborn ( sort of — squib father, muggle mother )

HISTORY

tws : death, mention of drugs, neglect, mental illness. i tried to be as vague as possible, but please proceed with caution !

xenophilius ? lovegood is an irish muggleborn wizard … sort of. the lovegoods, while not a strictly pureblood family, have existed in the wizarding world for centuries. his father was a squib, homeschooled all his life until he finally ran away from home in order to join muggle society. his mother is a muggle. a free - spirited future flower child at the time of their first meeting, she found his eccentricities charming and quickly fell for him. in fact, the two eloped the very day they met. ( yes, in somewhat of a drunken, drug - fueled haze. ) their first and only child was born exactly nine months later. 

in the muggle world, their son would experience as typical of an upbringing as anyone could hope for. his father never spoke of his background, and his mother always assumed that his eccentricities could be attributed to a mixture of recreational drug use and a sheltered upbringing.

the domestic bliss came to a sudden, screeching halt when xenophilius was just five years old. his father had slipped out of their home in the late hours of the evening, sneaking out to explore the muggle world just as he had countless times before. he knelt down in the middle of a busy street to examine a pothole and was struck by a speeding bus.

he was so young when it happened, but xenophilius was an unusually perceptive child and besides, he imagines that it was difficult to miss the drastic and almost immediate change in his mother. the once - ebullient young woman had transformed into a skittish agoraphobe in a matter of mere weeks. she would sit in the attic for days on end sometimes, sifting through boxes of her husband’s belongings and discovering old books with strange titles : things like quidditch through the ages, fantastic beasts and where to find them, and of course, the tales of beedle the bard. 

she would scream and scream if he tried to enter the attic, so xenophilius would sit on the topmost step of the rickety staircase with tall stacks of books that he usually got through in a few short days. his mother forbade him from the leaving house, but he was never exactly sneaking out and yet she never seemed to notice that he was gone. he would go to the library and a few local shops, but most of the time he just went out to their backyard and laid in the grass for hours and hours.

eventually, his mother only ever left their attic to read him passages from one of his father’s strange books or tell him about the magical creatures detailed within their pages. she would get the important bits wrong so often that most of the time, she was telling xenophilius about creatures that she had practically made up all on her own. of course, he had no way of knowing that. he retained every word she said and he always, always believed her. 

xenophilius learned of his magical abilities & roots at the age of eleven like most muggleborn wixen. his mother was hysterical at the mere thought of him stepping beyond the front door of their dilapidated hub of hoarding. the ministry of magic had to step in and ( almost literally ) drag him out of the house. 

he attended hogwarts school of witchcraft and wizardry where he was sorted into ravenclaw house beginning in the year 1966 and completing his studies in 1974. considered a surprisingly bright student ( albeit a chronic class cutter ), he received perfect grades in herbology and care of magical creatures and received near - perfect grades in all of his other classes … except for potions. too absentminded and easily distracted to remember the ingredients and brewing instructions, he just barely managed to avoid earning straight trolls every year. 

he usually stayed at hogwarts over the winter holidays, only returning to his home in ireland during summer breaks. his mother seemed to grow further and further from reality with every passing year. by the time he was returning from his fifth year at hogwarts, she was practically comatose. she no longer ventured up to the attic or rambled on and on about nargles and the swedish crumple - horned snorkack. in fact, she never spoke at all. she sat in a rocking chair in their living room, staring blankly out the window. if her son wanted to bathe her or feed her or get her into a fresh set of pajamas, then he had to move her completely by himself.

he doesn’t care about money himself, but wishing to recruit a full - time caretaker for his mother and holding a longtime interest in journalism, xenophilius decided to accept an internship offer from the daily prophet. he hates it. all he does is fetch pumpkin juice and refill inkpots for “journalists” who write whatever the ministry tells them to whether it’s true or false. he gets laughed out of the room whenever he tries to present ideas for articles, so he’s recently stopped trying.

he’s currently living in a small apartment above one of the shops in diagon alley for the sake of his job that he’s been thinking about quitting since a few months ago, when his mother passed in her sleep ( peacefully, he hopes ). he joined the order of the phoenix because a friend dragged him into it * wc ! as a devout vegetarian, the mere sight of blood or a living creature in pain absolutely turns his stomach, but as a ( sort of ) muggleborn, he ultimately supports the cause so he doesn’t mind it all that much. he’s attempted to reach out to his father’s family a few times, but even the notoriously open - minded lovegoods want nothing to do with a squib or his child. 

PERSONALITY 

is he really a muggleborn or is he technically a halfbood ? or is he just a disgrace to his father’s family as those he’s reached out to seem to believe ? as someone who’s always been certain & unashamed of who he is, struggling with his identity in regards to his blood status makes him uncomfortable so he tries to avoid the subject altogether.

vegetarian and environmentalist. the kind of person who scolds his friends for littering and stops what he’s doing to pick up random bits of trash in the street because he absolutely cannot bear to leave it there. blood makes him squeamish and it turns his stomach to see any living thing in pain. 

he always means well. i don’t think he has it in him to be malicious or petty, however ... he’s not the most reliable friend. he’s forgetful, he can’t keep track of time ... basically, he’s t*na in this meme & he’ll flake out on plans because he distracted with reading or eating a pudding cup or climbing a tree or climbing a tree to read and eat a pudding cup on one of the branches.

friend with least amount of shit together now reading tarot cards if you're interested !

the type of wizard to spend three hours looking for his wand only to realize that it was tucked behind his ear the entire time ... multiple times a week.

WANTED CONNECTIONS

the friend who convinced him to join the order

someone who looks out for him

the scully to his mulder ( or the hermione to his luna, if you will )

his long - suffering potions partner from hogwarts ( i think they’d have to be a ravenclaw or hufflepuff age  20 - 22 )

a roommate or two could be fun !

all of the usual stuff : best friends, exes, family on the lovegood side or the muggle side, friends who drifted apart, etc ! 

these are just a few base ideas, so please don’t feel limited by what’s listed here !

[princesswithabraidedcrown]

Attempt 2.0 of reading Mo Dao Zu Shi has commenced.

The first attempt was sometime last year possibly around the time that the Untamed was ongoing? I possibly saw a gifset of pretty people, did research, and found the translation but I am not one hundred percent sure on the precipitating event. Maybe a mutual was talking about it. I don’t know.

I do recall staying up way too late to keep reading and according to the tab that is still open on my tablet, I got to chapter 31 before falling asleep. I kept intending to get back to reading it, but life happened and it languished, unread, but open.

Enter my tumblr circle collectively falling into the Untamed this spring/summer, with more pretty pictures and metas and memes and just being generally awesome about it, plus my realizing that oh yah, this is the thing that I read 31 chapters of last summer and I decided to watch. Ahem. Well. The Untamed has now taken the spot of current hyperfixation, which might have prompted a foray into learning another language (slowly, painfully slowly), and again all the meta posts from people prompted me to look back into reading the book. Mostly I wanted to be able to draw my own conclusions about “controversies” instead of relying on the interpretations of others. (That’s very Zewu-Jun of me now that I think about it)

It definitely helps that I now know a bit more about what the heck I am reading, especially in regards to titles, names, terminology, etc... I very much have a running track of the Mandarin words for the things like forms of address running through my head as I am reading, so that’s nice. I do kind of wish that on things like units of measurement, there was some sort of conversion unit plunked in the translator’s notes, but I suppose that could be easily fixed with my own research.

I absolutely have plunked Wang YiBo’s fantastic work as Lan WangJi into my mental mindscape when reading because I’m pretty sure I was basically Wei WuXian the last time and thought that book!LWJ hated everyone and everything, including the disaster bi main character. I like LWJ more when he’s not...um...like we are initially led to believe he is, so hence the transportation of WYB!LWJ into my visual movie. I haven’t really plunked Xiao Zhan into my mental movie because, hmm. I’m not sure why, but it might have something to do with my being subconsciously aware that WWX is in Mo XuanYu’s body at this point in the story and I guess I just haven’t meshed the Untamed’s WWX and MDZS’ WWX. I obviously like both of them, but I like them in different ways, so combining the two seems off to me.

I do very much like having thoughts and feelings about the characters as they are introduced, especially the Juniors, so point to watching the Untamed first. I’m aware that the Nie brothers relationship is not quite as ‘wholesome’ in MDZS as it is in the Untamed, so I’m not looking forward to reading those bits. I just have lots of feelings about the Nie Bros and I blame half of them on Fatal Journey and the amazing actors. Not as thrilled that Shijie has a diminished part or that we learn nothing about the various characters until they are plot relevant, but I will survive.

We shall see if I do any more long reaction posts on my feelings.

[sparkmender]

THE POSITIVE & NEGATIVE: MUN & MUSE

Fill out & Repost ♥ This meme definitely favors Canons more, but I hope OC's still can make it somehow work with their own lore and Lil’ fandom of friends & mutuals. Multimuses pick the muse you are the most invested in atm.

Tagged by: @ifthearmorfits -- thank you opo!!

MY MUSE IS.   canon / oc / au (...in-canon au, because transformers) / canon-divergent / fandomless

(I will be getting into spoiler territory with this, but given that you all are following this blog, you’ve probably stuck around long enough to already see what’s up haha.)

is your character popular in the fandom?  YES / NO.

is your character considered hot™ in the fandom?  WELL… / NO / IDK. (evidently a lot of people have it bad for the nerd but I don’t do NSFW on tumblr, so lol)

is your character considered strong in the fandom?  YES / NO / IDK.

are they underrated?  YES / NO.

were they relevant to the main story?  YES / NO.

were they relevant to the main character?  YES / NO.

are they widely known in their world?  YES / NO.

how’s their reputation?  GOOD / BAD / NEUTRAL. (Given Rung’s quantum forgotten status WHO KNOWS)

HOW STRICTLY DO YOU FOLLOW CANON?

Putting it bluntly: Functionist alt. dimension Rung has a whole lot of plot holes. Swiss cheese boy. I’ve made liberal changes here and there so that he can play with a majority of muses in the MTMTE/LL community, but I’ve also taken a lot of free reign giving Rung’s general lack of backstory in-between spoiler/plot beats :P

SELL YOUR MUSE! (aka try to list everything, which makes your muse interesting in your opinion to make them spicy for your mutual.)

Rung is a very rare type of character, being an ostensibly ‘masculine’ character (in regards of a human binary lens) who prides himself on empathy, understanding, and caring for others’ physical and mental wellbeing in ways that often linger in more ‘feminine’ realms (again, in approx. to the human binary); it interests me to be able to explore such concepts in a territory where, considering lore and implied history, there’s no societal concept of (human ideal culturally-imposed) gender. He’s a creator ‘deity’, he literally produces souls, but nothing about his design is meant to emphasize a human sense of reproduction/fertility/etc. Most people would never look at him and conclude who and what he is. There’s also the fact that he���s been methodically documented, experimented on, taken apart, and then tortured for approx. 2 million years and yet he refused to let that break him. Rung is unflinchingly kind, willing to reach a hand out to anyone who needs a shoulder to lean on even when he has nothing of his own to offer. Hell, he studied medicine and philosophy so he could build the foundations for the Cybertronian method of behavioral psychology because even without memories of being Primus, Rung wants to take care of his creations. ...And then you add in how absolutely adorable it is to watch this old man dodder about with his puzzles and models and big googly glasses and I love him so much okay--

NOW THE OPPOSITE! (list everything why your muse could not be so interesting (even if you may not agree, what does the fandom perhaps think?)

To be honest, Rung can be kind of a Mary Sue/over powered character in some people’s eyes. Like, what, this random character who’s new to the franchise and made specifically by the author is actually Transformers God who suffered amnesia? And is friendly and polite to everyone but also has a streak of keeping a grudge and survives literal untold horrors because his body can just heal itself?? And he spits out crystals that make up sparks??? OH AND HE’S MILLIONS OF YEARS OLD AND DID I MENTION HE’S GOD SOMEHOW AND THEN HE STRAIGHT UP JUST DIES TWICE IN CANON, WOW

WHAT INSPIRED YOU TO RP YOUR MUSE?

H,,,, Him round,,,,,,,, No really I just loved his design that much. Him round. Also both my mom and my granddad are shrinks so I have, like, a basic grasp on psych stuff after reading through their textbooks and watching my granddad’s old research films and study tapes, so it was familiar territory I settled on writing Functionist!Rung in specific because I sympathize with having weird + painful medical shit inflicted on you all the time and because the idea of someone so genuine and careful being the core of a revolutionary movement is really,,, makes my heart squeeze.

WHAT KEEPS YOUR INSPIRATION GOING?  

hell if I know I’m just kinda here forever lmao

SOME MORE PERSONAL QUESTIONS FOR THE MUN.

do you think you give your character justice?  YES / NO. needs more weird eldritch tech woogies but I’m terrified of alienating people

do you frequently write headcanons?  YES / NO. (mostly as they get yoinked by the fandom at large and then my notifications break my phone)

do you sometimes write drabbles? YES / NO.  

do you think a lot about your muse during the day? YES (to an extent because I write a lot of different muses and I’m constantly making/doing/playing something to keep my hands busy, so it’s inevitable) / NO.

are you confident in your portrayal?   YES / NO.

are you confident in your writing?  YES / NO.

are you a sensitive person?  YES / NO.

DO YOU ACCEPT CRITICISM WELL ABOUT YOUR PORTRAYAL?

Criticism is the best way to grow as a creator, tbh, but I will say I think the biggest complaint is just how goddamn slow + forgetful I am hahaha,,

DO YOU LIKE QUESTIONS, WHICH HELP YOU EXPLORE YOUR CHARACTER?  

Sure! I have a tags specifically for weird Cybertronian biology quirks and for Rung just rambling about things, and it’s fun to get to reveal bits and pieces of the backstory I’ve created for him.

IF SOMEONE DISAGREES TO A HEADCANON OF YOURS, DO YOU WANT TO KNOW WHY?  

........I mean lmao you can tell me why you disagree but at the end of the day this is my personal portrayal of a specific version of a character who only shows up for like three issues of a 70+ issue long comic series.

IF SOMEONE DISAGREES WITH YOUR PORTRAYAL, HOW WOULD YOU TAKE IT?

There are several other fantastic Rung writers out there each with their own interpretations and understandings of the character, so like. Godspeed. Go, find the god your heart desires, and whatnot.

IF SOMEONE REALLY HATES YOUR CHARACTER, HOW DO YOU TAKE IT?

Do you hate my portrayal of Rung, or just Rung in general?? I know a few people who just straight up dislike any version of Rung at all, so there’s that.

ARE YOU OKAY WITH PEOPLE POINTING OUT YOUR GRAMMATICAL ERRORS?  

English hard, hebrew and yiddish and spanish and romanian and german only. More seriously I was raised in an extremely weird house where English was the primary language but I was being taught by older people who never remembered which language they were using at the time. My first word was Mickey Mouse. I don’t know what’s happening. I went to art college. Please be gentle with me, sir.

DO YOU THINK YOU ARE EASY GOING AS A MUN?  

Oh most likely. There’s only like... one or two things I will go out of my way to discourage or avoid + I’m generally just kinda here to make other people happy haha

[patromlogil]

Dealing With Intrusive Thoughts: Analysis: What Remus Tells Us About Roman

Patreon | Ko-fi

Analysis Tag List - holy shit this is starting to get long

@bluezingzapper @theitalianscribe @riot-meme @dabookwormcat @thatoneevan @icantpayattentiontoanything @4-the-love-of-anime1074 @never-rose-fander @lhumya @lime-trash @salted-skittles @sweaterkitty-fluff @risiskifi @catsarebestest @imnotcameraready @zozomind @mrs-masen-cullen @magpie1230 @suyun-doo @tinwegf @daflangstlairde @ryans-own2051 @ukeneko @awesomefandomfangirlfan @chaoticglitcher @dreamteaze @a-happy-crusteacean @inksandpensblog @bumble-bitch-sanders @tourettesservicedog @chatnoirismycinnamonroll @centorinsystems @anxiousalwaysvirgil @sariahs-song @hufflepuffgirl01 @ghostmisfits @lightningblaze11 @cyraniadebergerac @free-the-fandom @amityravenclawelf @daflangstlairde @katherine-reed @flamboyantlybisexual @lumiere-isameme @shadowybutangealicsongbird @griffinoliverwrites @mememuti @awkwardboisposts @thiaholimon @adashofaroace @lordphoenixfanwrites @microsoft-nerdy @lyricallylawliet @tmlpraxx @sunshinetastesgood @virge-of-death @grey-rainbow @whizzie72 @bigtiddygothhusband @deadleeblackwood @peacefulwriter

people who asked to be added but whom Tumblr wouldn’t let me tag for some reason-  @iihulkgirlii  @shinydreamer1262

Let Me Know if you want to be added to the tag list.

Blah Blah, mental health issues, also lazy, you don’t want excuses, you want the analysis.

WARNING: Frequent Remus mention

Roman spends a lot of the episode on the floor, so what could we possibly learn about him? Well in my analysis of SvS (and other vids) I spoke of Roman’s insecurities and how they’ve slowly been building up over the series, and I think after DWIT, we can safely identify Remus as the primary source of this.

First off, Roman is afraid of him. It’s established by Logan that Remus only has power if they believe he does, easily shrugging off a throwing star to the face with no lasting consequences. Roman however gets knocked out by a simple knock to the back of the head. Twice. Proof that Roman sees Remus as a threat.

However that fear is more complex than just being afraid of his impact, as evidenced by what I believe is the most significant quote from Roman we’ve ever received.

“It’s a little like looking into a funhouse mirror, but instead of a giant head, long legs, and a tiny torso...it shows you...everything you don’t wanna be.”

Roman is afraid of becoming Remus.

He’s scared of his ideas being categorised as bad, his contributions potentially being dangerous, and most importantly, he’s afraid of the other Sides looking at him with the same horror, disgust, and apathy that they look at his brother.

“Oh but why? He’s good creativity! They would never-!”

Listen up, Thomas is a fantastic actor, and there are countless posts out there of people reminding themselves, and each other, that all of these vibrant distinctive characters are literally played by one man BUT NO ONE talks about how characteristically similar Roman and Remus actually are.

First off, they both leave with the same loud, BYEEEEEEEE,  both smiling, though Roman’s is strained (I tried so many times to get a screen shot but I couldn’t do it, Roman nopes out of there too fast.) Frankly, it reminds me of Futurama  [6x01] when Leela finds out she was replaced by a robot clone and they both freak out in exactly the same way.

Both Roman and Remus identify as Creativity, they both have an atypical weapon (katana and mace), they both have a tendency to speak with their hands, and they both use arguably unpleasant nicknames - a practice that Roman has eased up on doing more and more throughout the series. Hell, even look at both of their designs. If you check out Remus’s costume over on DaVid McCarthy’s instagram (davidfordesign), they talk of ‘maintaining a ‘photo negative’ version of [Roman]’ in designing the Duke’s outfit. Remus was designed to be as similar to Roman as possible because literally the only thing that separates the two of them is whether or not the other Sides deem their contributions as Good, or Bad.

And as for ‘they would never’, true, they may not regard Roman exactly the same, but lately, none of the Sides have been all that in favor of a large number of Roman’s ideas. Sure they’re far from ‘Forbidden’ (with two exceptions) but they sure as hell haven’t been ‘Welcome��.

Then take a look at who takes Remus down. Logan, Roman’s harshest critic, who constantly diminishes his contributions and belittles Roman’s capabilities as a functional part of Thomas (at least prior to Logan’s growth exhibited in DWIT).  In Learning New Things About Ourselves, Roman outright states that he struggles to come up with anything because of how harshly Logan criticises everything he does. Roman knows it would be so easy for Logan to take him down and that scares him.

Roman believes he is just one bad idea, or cruel nickname away from going from Golden Boy to the Trash Man, and none of the other Sides seem to realise this.

Next time, Science of the Sides, what are they exactly, what clues do we have, and what are the implications?

[light-of-valentia]

matchup trade with edelgoth

 @edelgoth​ here are your matchups boo!! I have never done a written matchup before, though I have done them quite a lot in my head, so I hope these are good!!! -admin belle

I did two romantic matchups, one romantic/platonic, and I left a list of potential platonic matchups to follow!

matchup under the cut because I use a lot of words and I don’t wanna eat up dashboards

#1-  Mercedes

At first I was sort of questioning on if this would be ideal, but with the more I have thought about this, the more passionate I am about this pairing

You said you wanted someone who is open-minded and genuinely caring who wants to see the world become a better place, and I would struggle to think of anyone better to do this with than Mercie!

Though I did consider Claude for this as well, I ended up choosing Mercedes for #1 because I think that she would be better at consistently giving you the validation and affection that you desire

Not that Claude would not be affectionate as well, but I think that the stronger caring aura that she has would sit better with you

Both of you are open-minded and thoughtful, and you would be able to give e/o the same level of care and attention that you give out to other people

That's positive karma baby!!! you both deserve a lot for what you do for other people, and your philanthropic personalities would be a strong force together

I feel like in a relationship, both you and Mercedes would need someone who is willing and most importantly wants to give back the same level of appreciation and effort that you/she puts in, and you both would far surpass this standard for each other

I also really like here that you each take a different approach to what you do

Mercedes deals more in the emotional side of taking care of people, whereas you take the more insightful and analytical route

This sort of “similar yet different” style of partnership works really well since you have enough in common to form a partnership, but your differing skills would compensate for what the other lacks in

You each care in different ways, but it's clear that both you and Mercie share a common goal of making the world a better place and helping people out

You would be such a sweet, caring, and cheerful couple, and even without doing any sort of philanthropic work, just your presence would be enough to potentially change people’s lives for the better

Your wit and intellect would provide a healthy contrast to Mercedes' constant benevolence and optimism, and she would be able to help you ground yourself when you are catastrophizing and anxious

To compliment that, you would be able to help her set her fear of disappointing others aside and make hard choices when she needs to

Mercedes isn't necessarily as scholarly as Annette and Linhardt (though she did enjoy her time at the Royal Academy of Magic), but she still values her education, and she would enjoy listening to you talk about the things you are interested in and she would enjoy learning from you

Both of you are very patient, and it would provide a relaxing and calm atmosphere

Though, a problem could be presented if you are both too patient- neither of you alone likes to make difficult decisions and risk hurting or disappointing others, but i think that this would be easier to do if you worked together

Magic and fantastical stories!! i could really see you both taking evening dates and telling each other stories, and she would highly appreciate your creativity and encourage your passion for what you do

If you like writing paranormal and ghost stories, she’d love it even more!! She loves spooky stories and an air of fantastical mystery

Career-wise, your interests in anthropology and sociolinguistics combined with her desire to serve and help people would make a dynamic duo

Your understanding of human history and nature would provide a wealth of foundation for her to understand where people come to her from, emotionally and culturally, and the outcome of your combined careers would be stellar!

If you guys got together, I would struggle seeing an outcome where you kept your careers separate- the chemistry you have together concerning your desires for life and the word around you are too magnetic too keep apart

Mercedes would be very welcoming and accepting of your sensitivity and anxiety; she always knows what to say if you're down, and she wouldn't have to tread carefully to avoid offending or hurting you

Awareness of people's sensitivities and how to build healthy relationships without prying at them is second nature to her

Reading people and responding to them to meet them where they are is maybe one of her favorite things to do in life, and doing this with you would bring her a good sense of worth in life

Mercedes has a few opinions of her own, but she is generally soft-spoken and passive, and would be a great listener for when you talk about your opinions

She is very open-minded, and i’d argue that she doesn’t have a single judgemental bone in her body (well, except maybe against uptight nobles cough cough LORENZ)

I wouldn’t call her an agent of chaos, but I think that Mercedes really can appreciate the craziness of life the way that you do, and that she would be great at laughing the silly little things off with you

She has a wonderful knack for appreciating and accepting the world as it is, and I think that this would bring you a lot of peace when you start to over-complicate things mentally, as she would be able to ground you

She would ADORE your curiosity and interest in learning everything that you can, and she would aspire to be this way herself

She spent so much of her life simply trying to survive, especially after fleeing the empire and regretting leaving Emile behind, and having someone around her who is trying to thrive would be invigorating for her

MBTI-wise, this would be a “golden pair”, as IXFJ and XNTP are often listed as being such, especially IXFJ and ENTP, which if I had to type you by your description to me, I’d put you as ENTP over INTP, with an Fi/Fe subtype

The creativity that comes with your Ne would be very well recieved by Mercedes’ Fe, as she would be the perfect listener for everything you have to say, and she would be super interested in it as well!

Though she does use Ti as her tool function, she would be constantly amazed by how you use it so fluently

Her Ti tertiary tool would be able to appreciate your dominant/auxiliary Ti, without encouraging it to the point where you overwhelm yourself

In conclusion, I see you and Mercedes both as a sweet and soft couple but also with the subtleties of a power couple, and I think you would enjoy a long and happy relationship with each other!

2. Claude

As previously mentioned, I still view Mercedes as a more ideal match for you, but I think that you and Claude would have good chemistry as well

He has a lot of that humanistic personality that Mercedes has, but his is far more subtle and jaded from his history

Mainly, this jaded aspect comes from how he was treated in his childhood, although he doesn’t discuss it with just anyone, as one of those effects from being bullied as a kid is him having some serious trust issues

Pre-timeskip Claude would be a struggle in a romantic relationship, as his Fe isn’t very well developed and based on your profile, I think a partner with developed Fe is something you need

Post-timeskip, however, this problem would be eliminated, as by then, his Fe has very clearly developed a lot more (though it is still flawed), as demonstrated with his love-hate relationship for humanity in his A support; he hates the way that people choose to be discriminatory and mean towards each other, but he also sees the possibility for redemption and he has a genuine desire to work harmony back into the world

Some of his interactions with characters such as Cyril and occasionally Hilda show that his Fe even post-timeskip isn’t quite fully developed, but he does value the function, thus displaying a necessary element for compatibility

xNTP-ENTP couples do work out really well, but obviously, some compromises have to be made

Mainly in regards to extraversion/making sure everyone gets to talk enough, and taking care of real-world responsibilities like housework and chores

Both of you are incredibly passionate about what you do, and this would sit well with the other

I struggle to imagine Claude in the long-run with anyone who doesn’t hold a sort of fire in their heart

Your intense curiosity and desire to learn would match his own really well, and I could see you guys doing long dates where you take the full day to sit down in the library and dissect some idea that you had

Your interest in anthropology and sociolinguistics might be one of the best parts of this match! His life goal is to create a more united world, and your wealth of knowledge about history and culture would make having you around an invaluable asset for him

Just like he does with Byleth in the game, he’ll probably pick you up at first for your usefulness, but then he’ll slowly start to actually trust you and he’ll find himself desiring a relationship with you

Both of you would be the king and queen of meme, and it’d be a wonderful sight to anyone around you

Your interactions when you’re memeing would be absolutely off the shits, and your absurdist senses of humor setting off sparks with each other would be legendary to behold

He would adore these interactions with you, and the memories he has of them would be a treasure he keeps close

He can’t stand super uptight people, and you’re fairly laid-back yourself, so this is perfect in this sense

You both have a good sense of when it’s the right time to be carefree and when it’s the right time to take note, though

Although this ratio may seem more skewed towards the laid-back aspect in the perception of people like Lorenz and Lysithea, for you two, it’d be perfect

Normally with an ExxP/ExxP couple, I worry a lot about communication, but I think you two would be better off than most in this aspect

The fact that you have an extraverted side but are also a good listener is the saving grace here

Claude is a listener as well, but more often than not, he has something running in the back of his mind, so while he would be a good listener, he may not be as attentive as you’d like

He would feel bad about this, but as hard as he tries to always listen to you, sometimes he can’t help but letting his mind float back to whatever scheme he’s been plotting

If you’re ok with this, though, the road will be less bumpy- he might even appreciate it if your own mind drifts when he’s talking to you, as he would feel less guilty that way

He would try his best to help you when you are catastrophizing, but it would be a mixed bag of skittles for him

On the positive, he overthinks a lot himself, so he fully understands how you got to where you are

On the negative, he isn’t a very emotional person himself, so he has seldom reached catastrophization himself, so he doesn’t really know the best ways to handle it

He eventually learns what works and what doesn’t, but at first, it’s gonna be the effort that counts

Both of you are giant nerds and this would work rather well

He would love roleplaying and playing games with you given the free time, and you’d always be recommending books to each other to read

As for your sensitivity, Claude may not be the best at handling that, but he certainly tries

He’s generally pretty good at reading people, but with what upsets you, you may have to tell him a bit more directly for him to really understand so that he can avoid it

Claude would, though, be a boo in that he’d make you feel like the queen of the whole damned world

Insecurity??? Nah, you’re too cute/smart/amazing for that

He just loves to shower you in teases and he’d tell you every day that he loves you

If you want a flirt and a himbo, congrats you’ve found one

One other thing that makes me less confident about this pairing than the former is that Claude is a bit more free-spirited than you

He would do his best to anchor himself to you, but it’d be difficult to satisfy his wanderlust if you dislike travel- he doesn’t want to leave you, and he hates making you feel bad

To conclude, I think this has a lot of powerful potential, but it also has a few potential holes that make it somewhat less ideal

He needs someone that can teach him to value his own emotions and not just look at what everyone else wants, and I don’t know if you’d be able to reach him on that

3. Dorothea

Both of you have a lot of opinions, but you’re both careful about sharing them

I could see her as your kickass partner in crime

I am less passionate about this pairing than I am with your matches with Mercie and Claude, but I still think this has a lot of potential as well

Yyou would be able to teach the other how to appreciate the other!!

Lots of "you're pretty/no you" style interactions

Idk how else to explain this but your vibes synergize well???? Like both of you are very humanistic, but you're a bit more open and direct in your approach with it than she is

Both of you are highly creative but in different ways and this would work well

I think she would be like a muse figure for you and vice versa!

Both of you are into classical arts, which is grounds for a lot of fun dates and fun times

I can envision a lot of museum and opera dates

 and painting dates

 Y'all would just have so much fun being creative together

You both have a preppy side, but you'd be the nerd of the two, and she would poke playful fun at you whilst harboring an interest in everything you have to say

Both of you are very thoughtful and you'd find satisfaction in having someone who reciprocates the amount of effort you put into the relationship

Both of you have an enjoyment of fashion, and i could see you both having a fun time picking each other's outfits out and doing the other's hair and makeup

She would really like to flirt with you to try and get a reaction out of you

She would HIGHLY appreciate that you try hard to be an open-minded and understanding person

She wishes she had more of those in her life before she met you

Y'all would be such meme queens like...everyone else would label you guys as goals in terms of keeping a healthy air of humor around you

She is just so doting and passionate with you and she would try so hard every day to melt away your insecurities and worries

As a couple you guys have SO much chemistry; like once you guys sit down for tea and start talking, you find yourselves talking for hours, and Dorothea would fall more in love with your intellect and wealth of knowledge each day

The reason I still put this as lower than Claude and Mercedes is because I feel like it might be more one-sided, with Dorothea more attracted to you than you might be to her

I feel like she would be able to help you with your anxiety in a different way than Mercedes

Like she has gone through a lot of similar stuff with her past in its relationship to her self-esteem, and you'd both have a lot to learn from e/o here

This would work either romantically or platonically

For friendships, I’d consider: Ashe, Annette, Hilda, Ignatz, Marianne, and Bernadetta!

Feel free ofc to respond to me with any thoughts/questions you have on this, and I hope you liked it!! Sorry to keep you waiting for so long- I wanted to ensure quality on this

[warpfactornonsense]

Fic Recs

An incomplete list of Star Trek TOS/AOS fics I recommend.

Literally anything by ThereBeWhalesHere. She’s written such fan favorites as Sha Ka Ree, Refuge, and To Be Wed. (My personal favorite out of those is Refuge, though Sha Ka Ree is better known.) Mostly Spirk works with a touch of Tilly/Michael, T’Pura, and Chahura. Mix of TOS and AOS.

Magpie by waldorph - Spirk, AOS - I’d describe this one as an absolute gut-punch. AU where Spock and Jim meet when they’re 7 and 6, respectively. Chaos ensues, of the heavy-hitting and emotionally wrenching varieties, as they grow up. Note: I forget if this includes any underage content or not?? I honestly can’t remember... I’m usually one to avoid underage content like the plague, but this one came highly recommended by an IRL friend, and it did not disappoint. Waldorph is also a fantastic writer with a lot of great fics worth reading.

the ship in port is the safer one by KiaraSayre - Gen, AOS - Otherwise known as "the toilet paper mutiny fic.” It’s a hoot and a holler, in a serious way. Full of friendship goodness. Jim learns on the fly how to be a real captain, and how to deal with all the less-than-glamorous garbage that comes with it.

Tick-Tock and Fizzbin by entrenous - Spirk, TOS - OMS fluff. So fluffy. So fluffy, I about died. One of my all-time favorites. Sulu gives Kirk and Spock a unicorn dog puppy as a housewarming gift, but Spock’s not really keen on having a pet. Kirk, on the other hand, really wants a dog. (Full of positive reinforcement pet training techniques! Hooray!)

Phoenix by museaway - Spirk, TOS - OMS. Less fluff, more plot and angst. Misunderstandings, resolutions, problems solved... and appropriately dramatic hospital bedside confessions. Very nicely understated, for all it’s actually dramatic? If that makes sense? Just an overall well-done trilogy.

Insontis by KCS - Gen, TOS - THE CUTEST THING I’VE EVER READ. Kidfic (and I’m CRAZY picky about kidfic), and mostly cracky, but in a way that’s just *Pacha meme face* mmmmm. It even gets pretty serious at times. Jim volunteers to get turned into a tiny infant, and the Enterprise crew has to raise him. He ages every time he learns a valuable life lesson. Full of all the friendship feels. 

Without Words by plaidshirtjimkirk - Spirk, TOS - You want shippy goodness? Here it is. Spock’s never been on a date. Jim decides to remedy that, and try to convey to Spock what he can’t seem to articulate with words. Plaidshirtjimkirk has tons of great stuff worth reading, but this one is my favorite out of their works.

The World Well Lost by annaknitsspock - Spirk, AOS - Read the warnings. There are additional triggers you may want to know about before reading this work. But it’s so good: Spock and Jim are on Tarsus IV as kids. Then a lot of stuff happens... Hard-hitting and full of Jim being self-sacrificing for the good of his t’hy’la. 

Take Refuge in What You Know by CorpusInvictus - Spirk, AOS - Spock has extreme agoraphobia. Jim just wants to get to know his enigmatic neighbor. Also healthy doses of Joanna McCoy, who is an absolute treasure in this fic. All the bonus points ever for this fic for appropriate patience dealing with mental issues.

Of Socks and Spocks by gentleau - Spirk, TOS - Spock tries to be a better partner to Jim, and takes the advice of a few crew members in an attempt to show his regard for Jim. This leads to some misunderstandings. Insecure!Spock, but there’s a happy ending.

Those are the big ones, anyway! I might have a few others squirreled away in my fanfic tag.

[isagrimorie]

[January Meme] - Which season is your favorite in regards to the 12th Doctor?

“Which season is your favourite with regards to the 12th doctor?” For @thecatwriter

Series 10!

I liked some episodes in series 8 (Deep Breath, Time Heist, Mummy On the Orient Express, Flatline) and I thought series 9 was a step up in terms of Twelve’s characterization (The Magician’s Apprentice/The Witch’s Familiar, Zygon Inversion/Invasion, Heaven Sent/Hell Bent) with the magnificent, magnificent best in class episode in Heaven Sent.

Husbands of River Song was really really fun but it’s series 10, I think where Twelve as a Doctor has coalesced into the Doctor he’s meant to be. He’s not trying too much in either direction (Am I a Good Man? / And acting like a Teenager) Twelve is finally settled in himself. The 24 years with River and the 70 years with Missy and being around humans seems to have really help calm down.

And one of the best elements of series 10 is Bill Potts and her relationship with the Doctor, it’s a shame Bill’s story gets muddled into Twelve’s ending story and Missy’s redemption arc. But before it happened Bill Potts was amazing and Pearl Mackie had such great chemistry and dynamic with Peter Capaldi. I’m forever mourning Bill is a one season Companion, I would love for Bill to meet Thirteen.

I love how Twelve was with Bill, and I love that Bill questioned Twelve about his ‘if a person has a gun to his head, you have no time to mourn’ mentality to everything. Bill truly felt like Twelve’s student and a sort of parallel to Susan.

I will always remember the touching bittersweet scene in Twice Upon a Time :

Bill: I hope we talk about it loads. I hope we spend years laughing about it. Come back alive. 

Twelve: Be here when I do.

My heart. Then, of course, there’s Missy and her arc with Twelve, who at that point of her many lives is also making more than an effort to be friend Twelve. What started was a long con turned into something that slowly started to change her, only to be set back once again by her past self (Simm!Master) and unknowingly influence her past self by killing Simm!Master the way she did: Thinking of the Doctor and among Cybermen, which would explain Missy’s Cybermen plot in series 8. Bootstrap Paradox.

Twelve himself, who has gone a long, long way from where he started from in Deep Breath to The Doctor Falls (‘Just be kind’).

Peter Capaldi’s run was such a wild ride for me: I adored his initial casting, because, CAPALDI! And then was slowly disillusioned with his mean treatment of Journey, Danny, and Courtney. I stopped for a couple of years and then learned about his character arc.

I love a great character arc, it’s like a siren song to me, so I tentatively dipped my toe in with Husbands of River Song, loved it and then dove head long into a rewatch starting from Time of the Doctor. A terrible episode send off for Matt Smith, IMO but a great set-up to Twelve’s post-war trauma and just fell in love with, deliberately skipping the episodes that made me drop the run in the first place, and circled back to them until after ‘Heaven Sent/Hell Bent’ and building up a lot of good will. The Caretaker still felt like it was a rusty steel wool scrub over my skin, adding Kill the Moon to that mix, which was really unpleasant. They wasted Hermione Norris (HOW DARE THEY) Twelve’s continuous mistreatment of Courtney (his last minute compliments to Courtney were that, last minute and an after thought), and the way he was so condescending to Clara.

The only one and great thing about Kill the Moon was Clara’s scorching tongue lashing of Twelve, finally shaking him off that high horse and his ‘she’s my carer so I don’t have to’ attitude.

Then the brilliant Death in Heaven moment between Clara and Twelve and we finally see how much Twelve truly cares for Clara, once he, again, stops being so into his head.

Series 9 had all the fantastic episodes, culminating in series 10 with Twelve’s characterization making its completed run. I just honestly love how it all comes together. There are stumbles, of course: the Lie of the Land fan bait with the regeneration. Clara, Donna, and River needed to appear and give Twelve slaps because wow, was that cruel and undeserved.

(Unfortunately, much as I love series 10, I also feel like it gave Bill the cruelest thing to happen to a Companion ever. Sure she got her happy ending, what happened to her getting there? Yeah, I can’t forgive or forget that.)

Let’s focus on the awesome stuff tho: Twelve’s character arc, Bill! Missy, and the almost TARDIS team we got with them (and Nardole). Too bad they all kind of died on the first outing. Um, Team Disaster Go?

[outofcalms-archived]

*yeets my url*

URL Meme || Still accepting!

My Opinion on;

Character in general: All your muses seem/are interesting. But I’m going to limit this to the ones I’ve interacted with to make it fair~

Paine: Okay, where do I start? Initially, I thought she felt like a reiteration of Lulu. But the more the game went on, the more wrong I was proved to be. I love her so much because she’s just….strong. Not in JUST a physical aspect, but mentally and emotionally as well. Even if she’s emotionally stunted in the beginning, watching her slowly warm up to Yuna and Rikku was fantastic. I would have to say, that of the three, she was the one that showed the most growth in such a short period, even if they had to nudge her here and there along the way. That, and it was nice to see how the events from X ( and to a degree before that ) played a role in the lives we didn’t get to see outside of the OG crew. It made you feel more immersed; or at least…for me it did. And that’s why I love her.

Noctis: He’s kinda tough for me to analyze like this. The only reason being: I don’t think I gave him a fair shake during my initial play through of the game. We’ve talked about this for hours upon hours but…I can’t stress it enough: what he’s had to endure was very hard to watch. You know how deeply I’ve immersed myself into the XV verse lately, so I have a lot of feelings about his character growth. But aside from that, I have no choice but to admire him and all his faults. No matter how flippant or immature he may seem at first blush, there’s a lot more to him below the surface. And you see that over time. 

How they play them: In regards to Paine, you nail her perfectly. It was really cool to see how well our muses clicked from the very beginning. Usually there’s a slight period of adjustment, but I didn’t get that feeling between them. They naturally fell into step in each thread/ask and I adore you for it! 

And as for Noctis? There’s something about your portrayal that astounds me. It’s…authentic and genuine. The proof of that is in our threads together and all the countless asks/memes. The fact that Yuna is so taken by him, drawn to him and protective of him has left me baffled. He’s extremely relate-able and, to a degree, she can see some of herself in him, which is why I think they hit it off so well. And they’re so in sync! 

The Mun: What can I say that I haven’t said through our many, many, many  long winded conversations? You’re amazing, sweet, fantastic, incredible and overall my favorite person. I’m so glad we got the chance to get to know each other. I never grow tired of gushing over our ship, or plotting an entire AU without having written the first thing. How in love with Nocturne we are, or how it’s slowly corrupting our lives. From games to RL issues….being there for each other–just to listen or be a pick-me-up? And especially all the affection!  Just…thank you for being you~ ♥

Do I:

RP with them: You know it~!

Want to RP with them:  From here to the moon and back, always~!

What is my;

Overall Opinion: You are awesome and deserve so much more than you sometimes realize. If you haven’t followed, you’re really missing out! I promise….you won’t regret it! ♥

**Note: Mun’s answer are all to be completely honest. Don’t send url if you don’t want brutal honesty

[mondartmusen]

Do you have any symbols/motifs/themes/etc. that you’re currently trying to get across or plan to get across?

Easy Meme for a Burnt Out Mun | {Accepting}

Depends a lot on the muse, honestly! Some muses just don’t really have particularly specific themes and motifs, while others have very defined ones. There’s also a few themes that I don’t necessarily intend to go for, but that are very common in the kinds of muses I just tend to write? I’ll put this under a cut, since I have a feeling I’ll ramble.

I’ll just focus on one particularly present theme on my blog, since honestly I could do a Master’s thesis if I broke down all the themes on this blog.

Probably one of the most defined themes that my muses on the whole seem to share is an intense dedication to family. When I’m meme-ing, Irisviel is the mega Mom(TM), who adopts everyone- And, outside of that, her two utmost dedications are to her daughter(s) (plural if you’re counting archer-ko as distinct), adoptive son (in the rare scenarios she gets to meet Shirou) and to Kiritsugu. In general, family is kind of everything to the Einzbern, though unfortunately not really in the tender and loving way that Irisviel does. More, it’s their bloodline and heritage as the Von Einzbern family, the creations of those who achieved Third Magic, that matters to them- Yet, twisted as their mentality is, it’s certainly still an unwavering dedication to the dreams of their predecessors, and Leysritt and Sella demonstrate that even the homunculi can feel dedication to each other, as they give their lives to protect Illya in Unlimited Blade Works. Likewise, Illya is readily happy to sacrifice herself for Shirou’s sake in the true ending of Heaven’s Feel, as she comes to love him as her adoptive brother throughout the course of the route. Much the same could be said of Miyu and Shirou in her world, who value each other more than they do their own world- Which is really a fantastic recreation of the HF dynamic in reverse, in my opinion.

Khan has a strong dedication to her family- Particularly her wives and brothers, but her sisters and even her children as well. While the real Genghis Khan wasn’t an especially good Father, I’m not convinced that he didn’t care greatly for his children, and that’s reflected in Temujin here. It’s something she'd acknowledge her flaws in, if it were brought up- But, she’s undeniably still incredibly proud of her descendants, and loves them dearly. Given the chance, she’d be eager to do her best to try and make up with them, to be a better role model for her children- Though, even acknowledging her own imperfections doesn’t make her any less proud of what she acomplished in spite of it.

Likewise, a majority of the Arthurian Knights on my blog are intensely dedicated to the concept of both family and lineage. I wrote a whole post about the significance of Percival’s extended family (but that’s outdated now so I won’t link it), but there’s certainly more to it than that. All of Loholt’s emotional issues are caused because of her commitment to the importance of family and bloodlines- She’s entirely accepted the idea that the circumstances of her birth determine her worth as a person, and that because affairs are supposed to be a Big No-No for Kings, and bastard children an even BIGGER No-No, she’s developed about as horrible a self image as any of my muses even have. She blames herself for her existence, and absolutely idolizes her Father, and as a Heroic Spirit, her Mother, too- And, since she buys so thoroughly into the cultural significance of bloodlines, and the own unrecognized, painful role she occupies because of that significance, it’s made her extremely unwilling to forgive Mordred for their betrayal of Arthur. It’s not the place of an illegitimate child to go against their father, or to object to their treatment or demand recognition, and the fact that Mordred dares to disgusts her. In a similar vein, Tor is intensely dedicated to his immediate family, and also idolizes his Father, and on account of his family, holds a very deep and bitter grudge against Gawain’s family, the Orkneys, for the death of both his Father and his brother. His family is what grounds him, and losing that basically unmoors him entirely because he doesn’t know what else to live for. Percival has a strong sense of family, and also a very broad one- Alongside her direct relatives like her brothers, she’s extremely excited to meet even more distant relationships, like her cousins and aunts and uncles. She also loves her children and wife more than the world itself, and having not seen them again before she died is among, if not outright being her greatest regret. She also views the rest of the Round Table, even the ones she isn’t actually related to as a family of sorts, which is why she’s very willing and happy to look past most of the other Knight’s transgressions- Outside of her brother’s death, which is a particularly painful spot to try and resolve emotionally for her, due to her reluctance to hold grudges, but the very much unhealed wound of Lamorak’s death having been for a pretty petty reason.Galahad is very dedicated to the family they know- Which, as it happens, isn’t a lot of it. They care greatly for Percival and Bors, and Lancelot, distance as he is- But, with most of their other relatives (Mother, aunts, ect) having died when they were young or even before their birth, Galahad feels somewhat isolated outside of the two-ish close familial relationships they have.

Both of the Magus ocs I have on this blog are intensely family oriented people, and their families are central to their emotional issues and development as characters. Mai is extremely dedicated to the idea of her siblings, and a lot of her self-hatred and lack of confidence is on account of her feeling survivor’s guilt for having made it through their parent’s extreme draconian upbringing system, even by Magus standards. That they died, were rejected or somehow failed is something she blames herself for, as the nature of the Hayashi family magic is to reward only the most apt candidate, and thereby, her survival is undeniably tied to her siblings’ failures.Likewise, Cecille’s issues are caused by having lost the family she once had, and because of that, feeling totally and utterly alone. Her outright wish as a Magus is to have a family- Preferably, the one she’d had before, but honestly she’d be satisfied with simply being a part of a larger familial unit.

On the other side of the coin, though, I also have some muses who family very much isn’t important to, which happens to contrast them with this blog quite a bit. Lizzy has no particular concern for her family (excepting Uncle Vlad), who likewise had no particular concern for her. Her family is largely why she is the way she is- They raised her to think that extreme violence against others for even the most arbitrary and petty of reasons was an acceptable thing, and it lead to her developing sociopathic and putting no value in the lives of other’s beyond in getting what she wanted. My Absolute Worst, Most Horrible Person of a Muse, Claire, is kind of defined by her inability to care about anyone beyond herself, even her own child. Unlike Elizabeth, Claire really is monstrous and irredeemable, and the fact she’s willing to use, abuse and discard even her own family members is really indicative of that kind of thing.Artoria isn’t so much a villain like Elizabeth or Claire, but she her failings in regards to her family are perhaps her most grievous, as they were ultimately the downfall of Camelot. She was unable to show Guinevere the affection needed to make their marriage work at all, leading to her affair with Lancelot. Meanwhile Mordred (and Loholt) both suffered as a result of Artoria’s absolute coldness and lack of consideration for either of them as her children, which was the cause of all three of their death’s, as had it not been for the miscommunication and lack of care for Mordred from Artoria, there wouldn’t have been a rebellion in the first place. It’s not something Artoria’s totally considered- I don’t write her as being bitter or resentful towards Mordred directly (though she undeniably holds Mordred at fault for the death that their rebellion caused), but simply that she hasn’t really internalized the idea that she really does have a familial obligation towards Mordred, largely due to her own...Interesting family situation and the extreme difficulty and denseness with which she navigates emotional situations as is.Fortunately, Artoria isn’t a piece of shit, so provided there was an appropriate situation wherein the time and effort was put in, things could theoretically get better with her and Mordred.

There’s probably more I could go into, but I figure this is plenty fine for a general overview of the ‘family’ theme on my blog as it largely relates to most of my (current) muses!

[vulva-o-queef]

@hestiaq​ (making a new post because I don’t want to keep reblogging a long threat)

I’m really sorry for what you were put through. I sincerely hope you’re in a better situation now and doing okay. That’s horrific.

I remember the Ted Bundy bit you’re talking about- and she’s…. honestly quite right? If enough men have NPD/ASPD a few of them are going to seem intelligible, I think. I don’t really understand what you’re saying about Ted Bundy- if it’s tongue in cheek or not.

Okay, like I said, I haven’t seen this post she made. necromancerdoll just said that larps said sociopaths/psychopaths “can’t perform well in society/function with others.” I know aspd and being a sociopath are often considered the same thing, and I know a lot of them are pretty transparent assholes. Psychopathy isn’t a formal diagnosis at all, but criminal psychologists do use the term, and there’s a pretty solid consensus on what it means. Some people say psychopaths are a subset of sociopaths, and other people say it’s a similar but distinct thing, but in either case, one of the main characteristics of a psychopath (which a sociopath doesn’t, or doesn’t always have) is that they’re smooth and charming, and they use those traits to manipulate others.

My comment about Ted Bundy was sarcastic (and probably not in very good faith, but also wasn’t really related to the main point of all this), because saying psychopaths “can’t perform well in society/function with others” is the opposite of the truth. Ted Bundy was charming, socially adept, approachable, and likable, which was exactly how he managed to lure in many of his victims. He would put on a fake cast and ask women to help him get things into his car, which is what that scene from silence of the lambs is based on. Larps might be totally aware of all that and just phrased something too broadly. The only way it would be relevant to the rest of what I’m saying is, if she really meant to say that psychopaths are socially inept, it would be another example of how she tries to speak as an authority on mental disorders she doesn’t understand. Mostly I was just poking fun.

Women are over-diagnosed. But I don’t understand how Larps pointing out shitty behavior is the same as “diagnosing everyone”. Also, she’s talked about how borderline personality is over-diagnosed and often ascribed to women who are dealing with trauma. She’s also not talking about it from a “I don’t personally like them” only- “these people” are people who are cruel and vicious and play victim when called out on their cruel vicious behavior.

Clearly, you and I interpret the things she says about bpd and ‘cluster b’ in general very differently. For one, diagnosing anyone over the internet is absurd. In my first response to her, I did agree that she has made some good points, mostly about the link between autogynephilia and narcissism. But that’s about noticing an overarching theme within a specific population, and there’s already a decent amount of academic writing about that link. Case studies done by real psychologists. Actual studies done with controls and statistics and so on. And even with stuff like fucking “trans lesbian” dating profiles that larps points out herself, there is some solid evidence there due to the sheer repetition of entitled attitudes, fetishism, etc, the list goes on. My issue is with the way she thinks she understands BPD when she clearly doesn’t, how she applies “cluster b” or bpd to an awful lot of people, largely young ‘transmen’ or radfems she doesn’t like, and how whenever anyone she’s put down for having BPD tells her to cut it out, or tells her that she’s wrong about them, she dismisses anything they have to say by citing “people with bpd are insane,” or telling them they’re being irrational due to their disorder. Basically she’s using it as a shield to avoid being held accountable for the things she says. “Anyone who’s telling me borderline people aren’t irrational is only saying that because they’re borderline, and therefore they’re irrational!” I’m not saying she’s diagnosing “everyone.” And regarding transmen specifically, there are a lot of psychological factors involved in that situation, and for someone who’s so vocal about the cultlike, exploitative, backwards nature of the trans movement, you’d think she would understand how absurd and frankly just plain egotistical it is to think she can simplify all of those psychological factors and dynamics down to “cluster b.” Again - remember that she’s talking about people she’s never met in her life, usually judging from one blog description, a handful of posts, or sometimes nothing more than a fucking selfie.

Even as a younger girl with supposed “BPD” (who even identified with the label)- I wouldn’t have found this stuff offensive, and if it did (which I might have, and sometimes still do)- it’s really that easy to log off or go outside.

That’s good for you, and I respect your perspective. And you’re right, I could just log off and ignore what larps is saying. You can say that about anything anyone says on the internet, and technically it’s true. But I didn’t. The things she’s saying are ignorant, I find them personally hurtful, and I think she’s spreading misinformation, harmful stereotypes, and regressive thinking. I see that she’s saying dehumanizing and belittling things to women on this site who deserve respect, and probably worst of all, I see that there are a lot of people who look up to her, ask her for advice, sometimes idolize her a bit, and many of them will believe pretty much anything she says. She’s feeding them bullshit and some really vile ideas about mental health stigma, and how people with certain disorders (mainly BPD) deserve to be treated. I don’t think she’s the devil incarnate, and I don’t think she’s out here ruining lives and destroying families. I think she’s an asshole with an inflated sense of her own insight and knowledge, and I decided to say something. I could have logged off, but in this case, I didn’t. That’s all.

...I don’t understand how Larps memeing on a Tumblr blog and often posting insightful ideas about personality disorders is “insulting, ignorant, and dehumanizing”.

Yeah I don’t know what you consider “insightful,” but posting the definition of “insane” and copy-pasting a list of bpd symptoms and saying “see? these people are insane,” and tagging her response to my post with #have u ever noticed how all of these people have personality disorders (callback to “anyone who’s telling me borderline people aren’t irrational is only saying that because they’re borderline, and therefore they’re irrational!”) ...doesn’t quite cut it in my book.

She doesn’t bring up cluster b whenever she “feels” someone is acting unreasonable and dramatic- they… are unreasonable and dramatic- at least in whatever context, and people don’t have to dig deep to see who someone really is to be able to just say “no that’s insane, bye”.

Mmmm... I realize you see the situation differently from me, but am I acting insane? I mean, at worst, I’m making the undeniably blunt way she talks to people into something bigger than it needs to be. And yeah, I know... classic cluster b, amiright? But even if that’s the case, even if I’m misinterpreting her views, surely you can see where I’m coming from. And there are quite a few people who have the same objections that I do (mostly radfems, radfem adjacent women, terves, etc.). When she wrote that tag #have u ever noticed how all of these people have personality disorders, isn’t it clear that she was referring to me, as well as the rest of the radfemmish women who have been speaking against this behavior from her lately? Isn’t she making an assumption that I have a personality disorder (which I do not)? 

Do you really think my objection to the way larps talks about bpd is an indication that I have a personality disorder, and that I’m insane? Unreasonable at worst. But yes, she is absolutely using the excuse that those who object to her saying borderline people are irrational are saying so because they’re borderline/irrational. And like I said, I’m hardly the only example of her saying things like this. Someone just reblogged the original post of all of this and said #I just blocked larps bcuz shes been reblogging random old posts from me calling me a cluster b as bait #as far as I know I’m the only quote on quote crazy bihet that doesn’t have a pd? Someone else wrote #I really looked up to larps hence I’m so torn about this #if I didn’t believe she was a smart and decent well meaning person I wouldn’t care. That’s just on that particular post, within the last few hours.

People with personality disorders are diagnosed because they’re anti social and cause harm to those they “love”/interact with and the cluster b community (that I hung around) spend most of their time groveling in misery- despite often constructing their own fantastical narrative of people horrifically abusing them and demanding to be coddled for every emotion.

Some of them, yeah. Not all of them, and not enough to justify making assumptions about people you’ve never met.

What I mean is- the pain that they’re feeling is an offense to ego a LOT of the time. And other’s shouldn’t have to walk around eggshells to make sure that they don’t injure others egos.

Agreed.

Like it’s not real, rudfems don’t enable or contribute to violence against women. None of these women, no matter how mean they are, contributed to the pain I experienced in childhood for being called BPD- actually it was always men and handmaidens.

I didn’t accuse larps, or any other ‘rudefem’ of contributing to violence against women. I know that men were the reason ‘hysteria’ could be diagnosed in the past, and I know that men are the reason bpd is being overdiagnosed in women today. And I’m honestly not even trying to say larps is being misogynistic to the women she says this stuff to (though re-reading, I realize it could easily sound that way). Misogyny or not, dismissing someone’s perfectly measured, reasonable objection as irrational just because they have a bpd diagnosis - which in several cases, dr. larps diagnosed all by herself - is unacceptable, is the same pattern and circular justification used on ‘hysterical’ women in the past, and is particularly bad because, as we agree, bpd is too often being diagnosed as the new version of hysteria. She’s re-enforcing age-old stereotypes about mental illness, and she’s buying into it so completely that she really believes that borderline people are so unreliable that she knows what’s going on in their heads better than they do. Hence saying that borderline people objecting to her backwards stereotyping are doing so out of a kneejerk reaction to a damaged ego, rather than because they know what she’s saying is false.

Also - she isn’t talking about everyone with “diagnosed” BPD.

If that’s what she means, then she’s the one who needs to say it, not you. Again, I respect that you have a different view of this, and I understand your perspective, I can’t believe what others say about her intentions and supposed read-between-the-lines distinctions, when she doesn’t say it herself, and the things she says and the way she acts do not communicate what you’re saying about her.

Meaning, there’s a distinction between people who have been diagnosed and are suffering, and people who have been diagnosed (or not) and are cruel and have a total lack of insight and disregard for other people.

Mental health is complicated. You can’t divide people with bpd into two clean categories like that. That’s not how it works. And you CERTAINLY can’t lump people into the “bad” category simply because they don’t like how you talk about their disorder. You can’t see someone objecting to what you’re saying and assume that YOU know that they’re coming from a “total lack of insight.” People are not psychic. Larps is using the fact that some people with pds have a lack of self-awareness to dodge accountability when it’s convenient for her. It’s complete circular logic - something you would think she would be above, no? “they’re irrational, and when they complain about me calling them irrational, I can shut them down by saying that any complaint they make is irrational.” I know I keep saying this, but it’s true. In my first comment, I pointed out that this is her pattern, and what was her response? hashtag have u ever noticed how all these people have personality disorders. fucking exactly what I said her response would be, because that’s the only excuse she has. 

And yes, insight is a qualifying factor that “””exonerates”””” (quite a loaded word in this context????) someone from being “really” BPD. The thing about BPD is that they will not (or cannot) change- like it’s not a fixed part of your personality, and if it is- you deserve to be called out, and if it isn’t and you still behave like that… you deserve to be called out, still.

Again, no. If this is the case, then we need to make a second definition to separate “REALLY bpd” from “sorta bpd,” since currently they both meet the same diagnostic criteria. It’s not up to you, or larps, to create definitive new categories of mental illness.

I went from being told I had “borderline tendencies” to being diagnosed with full BPD, to basically nothing at all, because I became aware of those patterns, learned how to be objective about my thoughts and emotions, and practiced resisting them to the point where they only show up if I’m already in a really bad state. I don’t consider myself to have - or to have had - a personality disorder, because I’ve almost completely gotten rid of those mental reactions. But I know people who do have BPD, who are self aware, who are trying the same things I did, but the difference is that even though they now have the tools to keep them in check, those mental and emotional reactions are still present for them, and likely always will be. To say they don’t REALLY have bpd because they’re able to control it is frankly insulting. “If you’ve been able to improve it through treatment, you never really had it in the first place.” I know that’s not how you meant it, but that’s what it boils down to.

BPD is not defined by a lack of self-awareness. It’s a pattern of ingrained emotional and mental reactions (and, subsequently, behaviors). These often develop as a method of self defense against external abuse. Or sometimes there’s no abuse and it’s there anyways. The cause isn’t always clear. But the criteria calling these symptoms “pervasive” doesn’t mean the individual is unaware of them. People who know they have bpd, and who are working on treating their bpd still have bpd.

“...deserve to be called out”... it’s not larps’ business to “call someone out” for having bpd. She can call someone out for acting like a shithead, but simply having bpd is not a flaw that needs to be criticized. Your phrasing makes it seem like that’s what you’re saying, and although I’m pretty sure that’s not what you meant, that’s what larps seems to think.

Not only are neither you nor larps qualified to determine the “category” of bpd that people on the internet who you’ve never met fall into, but even IF that’s how she sees it, then, again, she needs to say that herself, and she needs to reflect that view in the way she treats people.

But to conclude, she really does make that explicitly clear that she doesn’t think everyone with BPD is a “screeching, manipulative, hysteric”.

Where

You made a bunch of excuses for her and I still have no reason to believe any of it is true

However, I’m mostly speaking for myself here because I’ve been hanging around tungle for too long and I mostly want to say that this all doesn’t really matter. Like, so many feminists on here ramble on about “but what about bpd women who get misdiagnosed?” yeah I didn’t face brutality at the hands of snarky women on the internet. These are not the people that even enabled the violence that me or many other women with trauma face.

Again, I didn’t say that. I don’t think she’s destroying lives either, I was just frustrated, saw that many other women are frustrated about her too, and I felt like saying something, so I did. That is the extent of my motivations here. I do think that she is spreading harmful stereotypes and misinformation, but I’m under no delusion that she is causing damage on a massive scale. She is, however, just one more raindrop in the proverbial ocean of mental health stigma. Insignificant as a single drop may be, surely it’s no less significant than any of those people with bpd whose bad behavior you say should be called out. If it’s larps’ business to call them out, then it’s just as much my business to call her out.

It’s not up to her and other women like her to clarify every single thing they say- people DO generalize and we should be able to communicate without having to specify for everyone.

I’m not asking her to clarify “every single thing” she says, I’m asking her to stop acting like a shithead, labeling people she’s never met, acting like she’s an authority on personality disorders, and using her actually wildly skewed perception of these disorders which is steeped in regressive, harmful, and demeaning stigma and stereotypes about mental illness in order to manipulate her way out of being held accountable for any of it. I’m not telling her to stop generalizing for the purpose of communication, I’m asking her to stop making inaccurate generalizations based on stereotypes, and to stop using “cluster b” as a catch-all for bad behavior. Just because someone is a shithead, or unreasonable, or overdramatic, doesn’t make them borderline, and it’s insulting to the people with bpd who are truly good people, who also have to deal with their disorder being an internet trend for self-dx’ers to milk sympathy and excuse their abusive behavior (sounds just like what larps would diagnose as cluster b, I know, but it turns out that many people who don’t have bpd exhibit these traits as well), deal with shitty treatment from healthcare providers who read the diagnosis and think they know everything about you before you even walk in the door (back when I had the ‘full bpd’ diagnosis, a therapist said to my face that people with bpd were considered ‘used goods,’ and my current psychiatrist treats me with an absurd and totally unjustified level of suspicion), deal with the massively pervasive stereotypes everyone else holds about bpd (ranging from ‘serial killer’ to ‘used goods’ to ‘fake trend on the internet to get attention’), as well as dealing with - oh yeah - the actual fucking disorder, as well as often comorbid cases of PTSD, depression, anxiety, bipolar, etc.

I’m just saying, it would be a lot more effective and hurt a lot less people you supposedly didn’t mean to target if you just called out the actual behavior instead of “calling out” a disorder. Additionally, I’m pretty sure that people with bpd who do lack self awareness are far more likely to respond to direct criticisms of their behavioral patterns than they are to respond to the label of bpd being “called out.” They’d just see the latter as more fuel for self-pity. It’s a little harder to justify being the victim of someone saying “hey stop being abusive.”

And if that’s not enough reasons for you, consider: people who have shitty behaviors who don’t have a cluster b disorder (yes, larps, they exist) are just gonna hear criticisms of a disorder they don’t have and brush it right off. Call out the actual behavior, and there’s a chance they might recognize it in themselves. It’s like a quadruple win.

A hallmark of bpd/npd/aspd/hpd is having no insight into that, that people say shit, and you take what you can and leave it-her, or me, or anyone else mincing that up….. doesn’t help bpd women live in a world where nobody is going to mince anything up ever. It did not help me when people coddled me, and I intuitively knew that and was deeply frustrated with it.

You’re right that it doesn’t help to have people make excuses for you or ‘coddle’ you. But not being unfair and pushing harmful stigma is not the same thing as “coddling.” Nor is “not mincing” words the same thing as saying things that are untrue, unfair, dismissive, and insulting. Much like Trump saying blatantly racist things is NOT “just telling it like it is.” (and no I’m not comparing you or larps to trump or calling anyone racist. except trump)

Many of the women who have ‘spoken up’ about larps on tungle, I’ve seen on other mediums (fb, wordpress) and they’re often just blatantly manipulative

Really? Am I being blatantly manipulative? Or insane? And, to reiterate, is what I’ve said on her post enough for her to assume that I - and anyone else raising these issues with her - ALL have personality disorders? Is it justification for her to say that I’m “glorifying” ASPD/BPD?

and will never have any insight to the fact that all of this is really a non-issue

I gave you several examples above, and here's your treasure trove:

https://larpsandtherealgirl.tumblr.com/search/cluster%20b

Notice how she loves agreeing with everyone saying they’ve been abused by someone with a cluster b disorder, or otherwise says something negative about a person/people with a cluster b disorder, makes sweeping generalizations and basically uses “cluster b” with the same tone that you would call someone an asshole - that is to say, using the same logical standards of “you said some shit I thought was rude, so I think you’re an asshole & I’m going to call you one” when talking about psychological medical diagnoses?

Yeah, occasionally she claims she’s only talking about The Bad Ones, but that’s a pretty thin excuse when 99% of the time you make no attempt to differentiate, and post things like screenshotted symptoms (which - if the “good ones” with that disorder actually have that disorder - would apply to the “good ones” too) with captions like “these people are insane.”

Again, I realize you see the things she says very differently from me, but surely you can see where I’m coming from. And I would hope that you can see that my having this perspective does not justify saying I have a personality disorder, that I am insane, or that I am “glorifying” ASPD and NPD. I would hope that the similar shit she’s said about several other women who said things similar to what I said would also strike you as unjustified. You can make excuses that she wasn’t literally diagnosing me with a personality disorder, but you can’t make that excuse every single time she says something like this.

but instead “leave radical feminism because it’s so full of mean lesbian separatists” and make huge texts about it everywhere else and how rfeminism is a cult.

Okay... this is an entirely separate and irrelevant subject and I’m not sure why you’re bringing it up. I mean it sounds like you’re saying “people who don’t like being told they’re insane are just butthurt kek” which I really hope is not what you’re saying. I’m pretty sure there are plenty of radical women who would object to being called insane and having their opinions dismissed because of a mental health diagnosis, who would raise their objections and still believe in their politics, probably due to the fact that - in this context - those things have virtually nothing to do with one another.

My point is- she’s not just saying ppl who criticize her have bpd- they often do because people with personality disorders come out of the woodwork to be hideously angry at anyone who calls them abusive or “wrong” and “bad” (whatever that means at any given moment).

In summary: I appreciate and respect that you interpret the things larps says in a very different way, and I’m not trying to tell you that you should be hurt or anything like that. But I can’t accept what I see as excuses that you’re making for her, since she doesn’t offer any of those explanations herself, and I don’t see any evidence of the intentions you’re attributing to her, in her own words or behavior.

At the end of the day, larps is the only person who can speak for larps’ intentions (much like the people whose criticisms larps deflects by claiming they’re motivated by irrational emotion and a threatened victim complex SHOULD be the only ones who can speak for their intentions).

And at the end of the day, larps didn’t show anything but disrespect and a total unwillingness to even consider that the way she speaks to, and treats, people with bpd and people who criticize her portrayal and internet-diagnosing of bpd, might not be 100% faultless.

At the end of the day, larps read what I had to say about her dismissive attitude and manipulative, circular justification for avoiding accountability. Her response was to double down on calling people with borderline “insane,” and double down on her own belief that googling a list of symptoms makes her an expert on psychology, as well as an expert on the thoughts in other peoples’ heads. She used the exact circular, dismissive excuse I was calling out, yet again said that the people criticizing her were all doing so because of their - well “our,” I should say, since she diagnosed me - personality disorders, rather than their actual thoughts, opinions, and perfectly reasonable objections. And then she answered a bunch of messages laughing about how crazy and terrible “cluster b”s are. No, she didn’t literally say “EVERY SINGLE PERSON with bpd is like this,” but come on. She’s not the only person who can recognize patterns of behavior.