#my memories of friendship with that man are hazy

[gojopill]

a/n. i wanna eat gojo’s ass so bad guys

Inside the confines of four bedroom walls, Gojo lets himself feel. He cries. He cowers. He aches. He lets you dismantle him with steady, capable hands, surrendering the weight of power that’s been pressed upon his shoulders since birth. You take care of him, and Gojo thinks he likes it that way. To be soothed instead of soothing—what a rare comfort. A fucking treat.

“You want some tonight?” You ask him. You always ask. 

And he most definitely responds, “yeah.” 

Infinity gets turned off and set aside. Bony knees sink into the memory foam topper, followed by his hands — thin fingers splayed wide and ready to clutch the sheets. Gojo blushes in that boyish way he does when he’s bare like this, on all fours. A touch traces up the back of his thigh, slow and deliberate, smoothing over flesh until it meets the curve of his ass—slap.

Gojo feels. He lurches minutely, ripping a sharp inhale. “Ouch,” he says with a dry chuckle. 

“Too much?” You massage the afflicted area, smacking a peck over his ass cheek. Gojo shudders. 

“No way.”

It took trust and patience to ease the man into such a vulnerable position. Countless post-mission lazing, reminiscing about the good old days of high school. You let him ramble about his woes, never once calling him annoying. No, you just rub his back and offer better wisdom than any quack shrink he’s had the displeasure of seeing. The memories are hazy; Gojo can’t quite pinpoint when this beautiful friendship soured into sex—when hugs turned to humping—but he knows one thing: whatever this is, it cannot end.

“Did you have a difficult day?” you ask softly. He feels about four years old, answering with a quiet, whiny hum. You’re knelt close behind him, coarse pubic hair brushing the sensitive flesh of his rear, fingertips tracing lazy circles along the dips of his tailbone. “Do you want to talk about it?”

A flicker of irritation edges Gojo’s voice. “Right now?” Shimmering, diamond-cut eyes glance back over his shoulder, casting a half-hearted glare through translucent lashes.

“You can if you want. I don’t mind.”

Gojo heaves a dramatic groan, letting his head hang heavy between his shoulders. The jagged ends of his mussed, snow-white hair tickle the bed beneath him. “You got me too worked up to even think about the shit day I’ve had.” Though, now that he’s said it aloud, Gojo thinks that's been your goal all along. His head drops further, voice thick and low, dipping several octaves. “I just wanna cum.”

“After, then?”

“Sure. Sure, fine whatever.”

That seems to satisfy you, so you begin to satisfy him. Two hands pry him wide open before a warm, wet tongue presses into him from behind. This wasn’t the first time you’d done this—eaten him with such ravenous vigor it made his eyelids twitch and his toes curl—but despite that, it always felt so foreign to Gojo. Like this level of intimacy wasn’t meant for hulking, six-foot-three grown men like him. It was the kind of juxtaposition Gojo would mock, he thinks.

“Oh,” he gasps airily. Your mouth has reduced him to a collapsed, weeping thing. By now, Gojo’s chest is pressed into the bed, his flushed cheek squished against his drool-sodden pillow. The soles of his feet have turned white from the pressure, digging deep into the mattress, connected to a trembling pair of legs that work overtime to keep his ass raised for you. His arm, uncomfortably wedged beneath his stomach, bulges with bluish veins that throb from overuse as he desperately tugs himself off, matching the rhythm of your relentless tongue. A bead of sweat rolls down his inner thigh… or maybe it’s your spit. Both, perhaps? All the same, Gojo reaches down to gather the wetness on his fingers, using it as lubricant. “Oh… my God.”

He moans until he can’t anymore. Something in his voice box goes to malfunction, and Gojo is left choking on stuttered pants of pleasure as his hips writhe up and down, up and down— “You’re... g-gonna make me fucking... cum...” he warns, his words breaking between frantic breaths. You hardly falter, sending another sharp spank to the meat of his ass cheek before sinking five fingernails into his skin. Gojo tastes like everything and nothing all at once; like wet skin and comfortable memories. Like masculine musk and spring break. His unintelligent mumbles fuel you—you eat him out until he’s tugging at your hair, tossing your head back and complaining about it being ‘too damn much.’

He lies there on his tummy, breathing heavily into a puddle of his own fluids, offering you a gorgeous view of his toned back. Ripped, heaving, scarred to the nines. Your eyes wander lower, to Gojo’s most private places. Between his legs, glistening, sticky, and damp. Despite his state of disarray, Gojo has never felt so cleansed. You wipe away the remnants of his orgasm, fetch him a glass of water, and help him redress into a pair of sweatpants. He won’t ever give this up. Knowing that every day, week, month, year leads back to your warm embrace, stroking him like he’s just another guy. Like the fate of the world doesn’t rest in his shaky hands. Knowing this, having this, is what gives Gojo strength.

“You still owe me.”

“I know. M’sorry.” He’s curled up like an overgrown kitten, nuzzling his head against your chest. “I’ll get you off in the morning, I promise. Too sleepy right now”

“What? I didn’t mean…” You pause, shrugging as you think. “Well, okay, that sounds nice. But I was talking about your day. You said you’d tell me about it.”

And so he does, albeit with a playful eye roll.

[chicademartinica]

2023 Favorites

Come play favorites with me.

Favorite Korean BL: The Eighth Sense. / Runner up: Our dating Sim

Favorite Thai BL: Never let me go / Runner up: Moonlight Chicken

Favorite Japanese BL: The end of the world with you / Runner up: My Beautiful man eternal (Show +Movie)

Favorite Taiwanese BL: Kiseki Dear to me / Runner up: Stay by my side.

Best director(s): Inu Baek & Werner du Plessis for The Eighth Sense (Korea and Germany) EX AEQUO with Jojo Tichakorn Phukhaothong (Thailand) for FIVE SHOWS (BL or not everything Jojo does is QUEER): Never let me go / Never let me go Our Skyy 2/ The Warp effect / Only Friends / Dirty Laundry. To be noted and congratulated: OG Thai BL director Tee Sintanaparadee with his best work to date: I feel you linger in the air.

Best cinematography: Never let me go by Rat Rungruang (Thailand) / Runner Up: Moonlight Chicken ALSO by Rat Rungruang EX AEQUO Never let me go Our skyy 2 ALSO by Rat Rungruang.

Best use of color theory : The eighth sense GREEN.

Best score /musical moment (instrumental): “Save you from the Death” by Ruiqi Zhao. This song is so good it was used in two shows, airing at the same time, produced by the same man, on the same channel. We first hear it in Never let me go (episode 05) as Palm ravenously kisses Nueng (for a long long long long time) for the first time. AND THEN it’s back in Moonlight Chicken (episode 01) as Uncle Jim and Wen do everything but kiss under the moonlight. Aof and Jojo really said we both using it to be desperate and erotic and what of it. 10/10 no notes.

Runner up: “Refined enlightenment” by Howard Harper-Barnes in I feel you linger in the air (episode 07): The soaring strings that perfectly follows Jom’s arousal as he masturbates to the memory of the most erotic oil massage ever. Refined INDEED. // “Bleeding Signs” by Chris Shards in Never let me go (episode 05): Dark and moody indie rock rumbles as Nueng reels from his brutal outing, homophobia, and Ben’s betrayal before collapsing in Palm’s arms in the yellow of Bangkok polluted twilight.

Best score/ musical moment (with lyrics): “I can’t lose it all” by Ben Goldstein in The Eight Sense (episode 06) The singer belting “I’m losing my mind (…) I can’t lose it all” are the only words we hear for the last minutes of a great, hazy fugue of an episode. (Last spoken line: “To give you trauma” before the lovers start kissing.) Jae Won and Ji Hyun make love and when the song stops, I was left with greys waves, panic, and a burning “JAE WON WERE YOU OR WERE YOU NOT HIGH OUT OF YOUR MIND FOR ALL OF THIS? Was that song a call back to “Where is my mind” of Fight Club fame just to play with our nerves? Good times. //Runner up: “Monsoons” by Johannes Bornlöf and Le June in Never let me go. This song plays for two minutes straight as Palm sways drunkenly in his lover’s arms as he reels from his mother’s violent death. “Monsoon rain and chest pains”, blurry lens and sloppy, tear-soaked kissing. Peak lakorn.

Favorite couple: PalmNueng in Never let me go. // Runner up : KingUea in Bed Friend.

Favorite chemistry: PondPhuwin as Palmnueng, GMMtv true hidden gem. Runner up: Nat Chen and Jiang Dian as Chen Yi and Ai Di in Kiseki Dear to me.

Favorite individual performance: Film Thanapat in Laws of Attraction// Runner up: Mix Sahaphap in Moonlight Chicken.

Most beloved actor this year: Mark Pakin.

Favorite Ensemble: Moonlight Chicken // Runner up: The Warp Effect

Favorite mother figure: Grandma in Laws of Attraction. Amazing actress, well written (Grieving!) character. // Runner up: Ji Hyun’s boss in The eighth sense.

Favorite friendship: Pat and Chot in Step by Step! Pat’s whole friend group! // Runner up: Alex and Army in The Warp Effect.

Favorite siblings: The Gu siblings in Stay by my side. // Jeng and Jaab in Step by Step.

My hatred for you knows no bounds: Uea’s "mother" in Bed Friend. // Runner up: Phupha in The Promise EX AEQUO Tae Hyung in The eighth sense.

Most beloved character: Palm! My sweet boy! // Runner up: King! MY King!

Favorite “I love you”: “I LOVE YOU UNCLE JIM” Li Ming in Moonlight Chicken.

Favorite proposal: Charn being a lawyer and a marriage equality advocate while Tinn is just trying to marry the nutjob in Laws of Attraction.

Favorite wedding: TinnCharn and the baby’s doll on the chair (Tears!). Runner up: Palmnueng marrying by proxy while being guests at a gay wedding.

The category is “Boohoo snot bubble I’m dazed and crying”: The eighth Sense. Runner up: Moonlight Chicken.

The category is “I’ve watched this scene without breathing.”: Ji Hyun’s reaching for Jae Won’s hand in The eighth sense ep 09 // Runner up: Ki Tae confronting Lee Wan in episode 04 of Our dating Sim.

The category is “My cheeks are hurting I’m smiling so much”: Our dating Sim // Runner up: Love tractor.

Punchline: “Have you been well? Without me?”  Ki Tae to Lee Wan Our dating Sim / “I miss you so much. I miss you so much” Fan Ze Rui to Bai Zong Yi Kiseki Dear to me.

Funny punchline: “You only love me when you do me.” Cher to Boss in A boss and a babe. // Runner up: “We can continue as a throuple” Rando in Laws of attraction.

Erotic honorific: “Call me Hia Win. Hia Win.” In Between Us. // “Can you tell Nong Cher what your present is Phi Gun” or “Phi Jeng” for “The kinkification of Phi” in A boss and a Babe and Step by Step.

The category is ‘What is this?!! A 90’s Yaoi Manga ?!!”: Kim Jong Chan’s (Korean actor Kwon Hyuk) Yaoi hands holding his lover’s whole head in his palm as they kiss in The New employee. // Runner up: Cho Jun’s ( Ki Hyun Woo) in a an all-black suit in Jun & Jun.

The category is "Whew why was this so hot ?" : Charn obscenely rubbing Tinn's arm up and down while Tinn is trying to punch him in Laws of Attraction// Runner up : Jae Won manhandling Baby Mouse by the straps of his backpack in The eighth sense.

Best smile: First Kanaphan as Sand in Only Friends // Nat Chen and his dimple as Chen Yi in Kiseki Dear to me.

Unfathomable eyes: Pond Naravit and his under-eye mole in Never let me go EX AEQUO Net Siraphop in Bed Friend.

Favorite dream sequence: Baby Ye Chan’s first erotic dream in Love Tractor.

Favorite kiss (on the lips): Palmnueng last kiss on the beach in episode 12 of NLMG. It’s soft and super erotic, there’s a bit of tongue, a bit of teeth and they are both shivering like crazy. Pondphuwin killed it and the magnificent Thai scenery finished it// Runner up: Bostonnick against the wall at the back of the store. Surprisingly Nick was the aggressor but was still moaning loud as hell. Neomark punched me in the face with their chemistry and hunger. Give them a good show and let them kiss. A lot.

Favorite kiss (not on the lips). Nueng burying his face between Palm’s shoulder blades to kiss his tattoo in the finale of NLMG. // Ze Rui rubbing and kissing Zong Yi’s beauty mark every chance he gets in Kiseki dear to me.

Favorite sniff kiss (special Thailand): Uncle Jim inhaling Wen’s face in Moonlight Chicken. Possibly the most erotic sniff kiss I have ever seen, shout out to Earth. // Runner up: Winteam having a HEAVY ratio of sniff kisses in their make-outs in Between Us.

Favorite neck kiss: Bed Friend’s King is the BL best neck kisser, licker, biter ever. Net being shorter than James made this even more enjoyable. // Ray being obsessed with Sand’s neck in Only Friends.

Favorite make out: JengPat car make out in Step by Step. Whew. // Runner up: WinTeam locker room make out. Whew.

Favorite erotic moment: Win seducing Team and making sure he is sober, single, and horny while fogging up the room in Between Us. // Runner up: I feel you linger in the air oil massage than orgasm to the memories of said oil massage.

Favorite O scene: Songkhram and Ai making love in Destiny Seeker. Who knew 69ing could be so cute? // Runner up: Ritsu and Masumi, I quote “going at it like monkeys” in The end of the world with you. Ritsu was a fuckboy from space but also like, a Japanese sex God.

Favorite cuddles: Winteam. In bed. Every single scene in Between Us // King clinging to Uea, dead asleep in the crook of his neck in Bed Friend.

Favorite hug: Li Ming hugging a sobbing Heart in Moonlight Chicken.

Favorite tears: WinTeam devastating sobs after Win saves his boo from drowning.

Favorite lift off: Ai Di spending one third of the show being carried by Chen Yi. // Runner up: Joke carrying Zo like he is not also 6ft1 in Hidden Agenda.

Favorite food : Love Mate's orgasmic post sex burgers and fries in episode 04.

That's my too long list of 2023 favorites. Hope you enjoy. @absolutebl and all of you booes are welcome to use the categories you like, please tag me in your lists. To a very bisexual (AND VAMPIRIC) 2024 together.

Chica.

[iwantjaketosullyme]

𝐚𝐩𝐡𝐫𝐨𝐝𝐢𝐭𝐞 ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ ᴘᴀʀᴛ Ⅲ: ɪꜰ ʏᴏᴜ ᴡᴀɴᴛ ᴍᴇ, ɪ'ʟʟ ᴀᴅᴏʀᴇ ʏᴏᴜ

➺ pairing: aged up!lo'ak x f!metkayina!reader (fluff) ➺ series summary: lovesick!lo'ak does all he can to win the heart of oblivious!reader ➺ chapter summary: ❝ You dare to divulge your deepest concerns to him, and his heart swells the more with his love for you. ❞ (w/c: 2.6k) ➺ warnings: tattooing, sharp object (knife), mention of near death experience a/n: this chap is dedicated to my bestie @heirtothekingdom !! she always encourages me just when i need it <33 na'vi dictionary at the end :)

« 𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐢𝐨𝐮𝐬┃𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭┃𝐧𝐞𝐱𝐭 »

─────── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───────

Nearly two days have passed since Lo’ak’s serendipitous encounter with you. The first day had begun optimistically – he had been excused from tsurak training in favour of him recovering (courtesy of Ao’nung and his big mouth, it was not long before Tonowari had heard of his underwater crisis).

With no obligations for the day and unable to banish you from the chambers of his mind, Lo’ak had been determined to find you, in spite of the very few clues he had to go by.

Alas, he had allowed his heart to take precedence over his brain, spending the whole day walking from one end of the village to the other with neither plan nor formula. This resulted, of course, in a fruitless search.

With the next day comes the return of tsurak training. With tsurak training comes Ao’nung, which Lo’ak is beginning to regret more and more as he walks towards the waterfront and sees what – who – is waiting for him.

“Oh nooo man,” Lo’ak shakes his head in equal parts disbelief and equal parts fear, braids swinging wildly as he expresses his discontent. “Nah, really cuz?” He directs an accusing glare at the smug Ao’nung. “You’re gonna make me deal with her again?”

A single one of his blue fingers rises to point aggressively at the threshing figure in the water, powerful wings threatening to spread out and clear the men holding her down – she’s been in this position before and she does not like it. Not. One. Bit.

“I nearly died!” Lo’ak has his arms held out in front of him, palms facing upwards as he shows his displeasure physically; not the first time he’s used his hands to get a point across to Ao’nung. Thrown into a state of alarm, his eyes dart between his friend, Ao’nung and his foe, Niie.

“Let me teach you something,” Ao’nung starts, deep baritone voice affected with a hint of arrogance as he declares, “persistence is the mark of a true Metkayina warrior”. He falls silent afterwards, as if waiting for a round of applause that never comes.

“Oh?” Lo’ak fakes a gasp, responding with a sarcastic “Is that why you’re trying to kill me again?! It didn’t work the first time, huh?”, referring to the shaky start to their friendship, “Or the second time either?”, referring to just two days ago.

As if coming to a realisation, Ao’nung tilts his head, shrugs and retorts, “My bad, I just thought you had it in you, forest boy.”

In that instant, Lo’ak feels the eyes of the other warriors settle on him, searing into his skin at every angle. With the heat of their gazes burning strong, he feels as if he has travelled back in time and he is the outcast, adolescent Lo’ak again with so much to prove, and everything to lose. The silent question is asked. Will the son of Toruk Makto rise to the challenge?

Throwing caution to the wind, Lo’ak decides to abandon all thought and reason, intent on proving his worth, securing his place amongst the once-foreign Metkayina people. That’s what iknimaya is all about, right? Sivako.

He inches into the water slowly, taking short, cautious steps, wary of angering Niie further. Blood running hot and anticipation buzzing beneath his skin, Lo’ak ignores the hoots and hollers of the men still pinning Niie down. He is not sure if they are meant to be encouraging or condescending. He does not care.

As he nears her still-writhing body, he thinks back to hazy memories of you brushing a hand over her skin before leaning into the side of her face and deeply inhaling, uniting your breath with hers. 

Emulating your actions, he runs a shaky hand along the length of Niie’s tense form, observing as it relaxes upon his touch. He wades further into the water, brings his face close to Niie’s and slows his breathing to match hers.

His eyelids flutter shut, and he feels all of his inner turmoil melt away into nothing, the previously troubled waters around them now still, a perfect reflection of his mental state. Face now directly in front of Niie’s, his eyes open again and he looks at her. She looks at him. 

Some form of understanding is materialised in the shared vulnerability of undeviating eye contact. Mutual respect is born, Lo’ak knowing that Niie was an integral part to his rescue and Niie knowing that he has let down his guard and made an effort to See her.

Refusing to question the surprisingly tender moment and let his awe (fear) of Niie catch up to him, Lo’ak latches his kuru to hers and seats himself on her back with haste.

Atop his new companion, Lo’ak experiences the reef in a way he never has before, feels closer to being truly Metkayina than he ever has before. He scours the ocean for you, hoping against hope that the Hand of Eywa that had already shown itself strong would move again to bring the two of you together. In spite of how much he wills for it to happen, it does not. He ventures back to the place you first met, but it is absent of your magnetic presence.

By the time he returns to the shore, it is nearly eclipse. Once again, he has wasted an opportunity to find you. He shrugs off Ao’nung’s congratulatory back slaps, downturned ears deaf to the accompanying ululating.

Dispirited, he ambles back to the Sully marui, mind set on flopping his weary body onto his hammock, burying his head into his arms and burying his feelings of disappointment deep within himself.

Winding down the woven pathway, Lo’ak’s ears quirk in curiosity as he hears a familiar peal of laughter travel through the stagnant night air. But it’s not Tuk’s, and it’s not Kiri’s.

His feet carry him faster than before as his whole body reacts to the one person it has been seeking for the past two days. Lo’ak’s hurried steps come to a halt when he reaches the marui, expectant eyes flitting from family member to family member, until finally, they rest on you.

Nobody has been alerted of his arrival yet, allowing him to take the scene in front of him in covertly. Gathered on a large woven mat is his whole family, plus you. You are sat in the middle, with everyone else seated around you, listening intently to what you are saying and hanging on to your every word.

To him, this is an accurate representation of how he sees you. You are a celestial body, pulling those around you inwards with the crippling gravity of your allure.

His eyes trail downwards. You seem to be teaching them how to…weave Metkayina bracelets? It is a type of braid that he has never seen in the five years he has been living in Awa’atlu. Of course, he muses, typical of you to surprise him.

Honing in on the ongoing conversation, he hears you mutter a quiet joke to Neytiri, giggling after each word you let out. Expecting an appreciative glance and half-smile at best, he is so shocked when he hears the crystal chiming of her laugh in response that his throat closes up and he splutters out a cough, bringing the attention of everyone in the marui to him.

You notice him and he swears to Eywa, the smile on your pretty face widens even further. He’s still getting over the shock of Neytiri, his stone-cold aerial killer mother, being so easily charmed by you when you rise from where you are sitting to stand in front of him. 

“Lo’ak!” You exclaim, grabbing his arm that hangs limply by his side and pulling him to where the others are sat. His brain begins to short-circuit when you tug on his arm, seating him so close to you that his eyes can trace the shape outlined by the glowing tanhi on your face. “I’ve been waiting for you!”

You’ve been waiting for him? Lo’ak’s mind races as he tries to keep up with everything that has happened in the past five minutes. Five minutes ago, he was preparing himself for the cruel possibility of never seeing you again. Now, however, he is overcome with joy and anticipation for what it is you have come to say.

Your volume lowers and a bashful grin spreads across your face as you reveal, “I wished to invite you to my tattoo marking ceremony tomorrow. It is to celebrate and document my first rescue.” Lo’ak’s lingering silence makes you backtrack slightly. “O-only if you want to! I know you are probably busy training for-”

“Yes!” Lo’ak interjects quickly, finally having found agency over his own tongue again and processed your unexpected invitation. “Of course, I-I’d be honoured!” He flounders, thrilled at the prospect of spending more time with you by your request.

You both alternate between looking up into each other’s eyes and averting your gazes immediately after, the nerves and excitement of a new romance inhibiting your ability to carry a full conversation. Behind your backs, Jake and Neytiri share a knowing look, recognising the humble beginnings of young love.

The following day comes too slowly for Lo’ak’s liking. When the rays of light from the Alpha Centauri star meet the rippling water of the Eastern Sea, morning comes and so do the jitters. As he walks towards the Tsahik’s tent, where you had said the marking would take place, he cracks his neck to the right, then to the left and shakes out his wrists.

Reaching the tent, his knuckles rap on the flap of the entrance. Waiting pensively, Lo’ak wonders how he should greet you. Try not to embarrass yourself this time, skxawng. “Hey!” No, too eager. “Good day.” Too formal. Keep it suave, man. He lets out a shaky chuckle and raises an arm to lean against the side of the entrance. “What’s up, pretty girl-”

The flap is flipped to the side, revealing the imposing figure of a Metkayina woman. But not just any woman, Tsahik Ronal. 

“O-oel ngati kameie, Tsahik,” Lo’ak spits out, rapidly bringing his raised arm back down and standing up straight. He wills himself not to squirm under her scrutinous squint, feeling the tension leave his shoulders when she relents, simply inclining her head to behind her, gesturing for him to follow after her. Phew.

Off to the side, Ronal readies the instruments that will be used to undertake the procedure. Walking further into the tent, he spots you sitting on the floor with your eyes closed and head rolled back, doing the customary meditation that is done by clan members before receiving a Metkayina tattoo.

One must commune with Eywa first to receive the vision of what the Great Mother intends to be permanently painted onto the canvas of your skin, and how you will be etched into the communal memory of your clan.

Your preoccupation permits Lo’ak to look around the tent, and as he does so he realises that he will be the only witness to this ceremonious act. Typically, a few of those closest to the recipient of the tattoo are invited to bear witness, like how himself and the rest of his family were when Neteyam received his first, but you have decided against that. How odd. Unless…

His mind goes back to previous conversations with Tsireya in the days of his assimilation lessons – she had mentioned that inviting a single person to your tattoo marking ceremony was one of the highest honours that one clan member could bestow upon another. On most occasions, this is only done to make a private declaration to the person you invite that you intend to court them.

Lo’ak does not have enough time to fully digest this, as before he knows it, Ronal is announcing the commencement of the ceremony. You return from your state of meditation, positioning yourself in front of the Tsahik and allowing her to take control of the ordeal.

With an air of grace that can only be achieved by someone who has done an action time and time again, Ronal unsheathes her knife made of sharpened payoang bone from its shell casing. The same instrument that has been used by those that came before her to conduct this exact ceremony in the centuries gone by.

She then uses it to sharply pierce the skin on your chest, drawing a droplet of blood onto the needle-like knife. She brings it to her tongue, closing her eyes as she allows the Great Mother to tell her of the distinct shapes and curves of your tattoo, where it should start and where it should end.

Content with the picture formed in her mind, Lo’ak watches closely as Ronal picks up another sharpened piece of bone laid out on the table beside her, dipping it into a well of ink collected from an animal before beginning to paint on your skin.

Lo’ak feels as if he has been put into a trance, ink undulating in hypnotic curves that draw him in. He nearly misses the pinched expression on your face, or how you extend your hand in his direction, a silent request for him to hold it – the first time you have acknowledged him since he walked in. 

Ronal’s silence indicates to him that he can proceed without fear of disrupting the ritual. Wasting no time and keen to relieve you of your pain in any way he can, he launches himself forward and grasps your hand. His soul nearly ascends to Eywa when he feels you squeeze his hand in appreciation.

It’s early afternoon when the ritual ends and your tattoo is complete. The two of you exit the Tsahik’s tent together, hands still connected, neither of you ready to let go just yet. Lo’ak allows his eyes to rake over the new addition to your anatomy.

The tattoo spans from under your breasts to the middle of your belly, an elaborate and intricate pattern. On one end, the curves are close-knitted, reminding him of the inviting safety of your embrace, while the looser curves on the other end resemble the waves and the freedom they possess.

You sit with him on the pathway and talk for hours, telling him the story of your iknimaya, your first tattoo and the struggles of being a tsakarem, preparing to assist Tsireya when she takes on the role of Tsahik after her mother.

“The pressure is just too much sometimes, you know?” You dare to divulge your deepest concerns to him, and his heart swells the more with his love for you. “It’s why I dance. To escape. That’s why I was there that day.”

Everything begins to make sense now. Why he swears he had never seen you before, why it had been impossible to find you over the past two days. Day in, day out, you are cooped up in the Tsahik’s tent, earning your place in the clan.

“My life changed that day. That’s why it was so important to me for you to be here with me today.” Lo’ak can feel himself going cross-eyed as he maintains unwavering eye contact with you, waiting for you to say what he thinks you will. What he prays you will.

“If not for you, Eywa knows how long I would have had to wait to get my first rescue outside of the tent. And I must thank the Great Mother, for blessing me with a friend like you, Lo’ak.”

His heart clenches, and just like that, the world of whimsical romance Lo’ak had built in his head comes tumbling down.

─────── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───────

na’vi dictionary

tsurak - skimwing // nantang - viperwolf // toruk makto - rider of last shadow // iknimaya - rite of passage to become an adult in a na'vi clan // sivako - rise to the challenge (said before hunts like a war cry) // kuru - na’vi neural whip, queue // marui - tent // tanhi - na’vi bioluminescent freckles // skxawng - idiot // oel ngati kameie - I see you // payoang - fish // tsakarem - tsahik-in-training

© iwantjaketosullyme tumblr 2023

☼ 𝘵𝘢𝘨𝘭𝘪𝘴𝘵:

@heirtothekingdom , @bebkyu , @amiah24 , @inlovewithpandora , @alathan13 , @girlnred , @ggujkie , @aemondhoe , @malandrinhass , @itsyagirl01 , @mookiepookiesblog , @idekstopasking , @thelxnelyworld , @whitch123 , @camila-alejandra26 , @draiochtwrites , @leoloeleosworld , @seokmin130 , @apple-law-pie , @daddyvinniesleftnut , @flwrsatsuns3t , @thehoneymushroomhealer , @marsbars09 , @andraga12

𝘭𝘮𝘬 𝘪𝘧 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘯𝘢 𝘣𝘦 𝘢𝘥𝘥𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘰/𝘳𝘦𝘮𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘥 𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘮 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘵𝘢𝘨𝘭𝘪𝘴𝘵 <3

[still-a-morosexual-help]

Here's MY thoughts on the love island the game's seasons, for no reason other than I want to:

Also because the majority of the people following me are here for OM! & I want to drag more people down into the litg hell with me :)

Season 1: why is everyone so bitchy for no reason????? Talia & Jake are okay but other than that it's meh... don't really like the art style either

Season 2: Immaculate. Chef's kiss. They hit a high they never reached again. Somehow managed to balance the drama & the found family aspect and created a dynamic where you can actually believe everyone is friends and having fun even if sometimes they try to kill each other. Characters are flawed but generally decent people who are allowed to grow throughout the season. You get the option to make MC a bi gym-bro who can devour an entire cake in one sitting and bench press her partner. There's a reason this got two sequels.

Season 3: It's fine ig. Short and kind of boring. Nothing much happens. AJ is so cute though she almost makes up for it.

Season 4: Honestly a close 2nd favourite. We get a lot of character backstory and like s2 it touches on some serious issues. The season with some of the funniest moments/lines of dialogue - multiple moments where I just laughed out loud. I'm still only half way through it but the "villain" is just straight up mean for no reason and doesn't get any character development like the characters in S2 but makes up for it by having some of the funniest interactions with other characters and I was so sad to see her go. Also the season where I desperately wish MC was allowed to be in an open relationship till the very end and finish off the season in a polycule with every other islander who was in the love "triangle"s of the the season because this was the hardest season to pick a LI - Najuma is just all around amazing, Bruno is sweet & funny, Tom is so pathetic* MC & Thabi's friendship is also the best thing? It's great seeing a platonic relationship that is as loving (if not more so) than the romantic relationships. It's literally:

Season 5: Psychological horror. The producers said 'hey wouldn't it be funny if we torture this woman on national tv' and then committed to the bit. My memories are hazy because even though I only played it earlier this year it upset me so much I did my best to block most of it out but also I'm 100% sure there was actual galighting happening. Don't know why MC stuck around till the end because all she's gonna be able to use the money for is to pay for her therapy. Anyway I think MC should have been allowed to brutally murder everyone, she deserved it <3

Season 6: I liked the concept but I think they should have utilised it more. I'm still right at the very beginning (around ep 9) and I KNOW the general consensus from everyone who has reached the last eps seems to be that Amelia sucks MAJOR ass. But look, this is the first time a game has given me a MC with a canon family member who is also part of the game so in my opinion Amelia could commit war crimes and she's still be the most precious little uwu ever because I'm activating MC's insanely overprotective oblivious to all faults ""big"" sister mode

Edit:

*I just played more of S4 and holy shit someone needs to get this man away from his parents and also maybe get him some therapy jfc

Edit 2:

** youcef, mc & valentina helping tom figure out he likes flowers and pink and tie-dye clothes and makeup and being complimented and called pretty and getting hugs is getting to me okay his parents better watch the show and see their adult son finally discovering himself and what he likes instead of what they think he should like and finally being able to let loose and have fun without worrying about what others think of him and finally being happy and they better get some sense knocked into them OR he should go to therapy and realise that no matter how much he loves his parents their love and regard being so conditional to the point that he's hidden his entire personality and is now so extremely self-conscious of it whenever it does manage to peak out, that he nearly cries on national tv after a practical stranger compliments those hidden bits is not good. Also the man has some of the most insane repressed queer vibes???? What do you mean he sees a canon nonbinary person wearing a floppy hat and is reminded of the floppy hat he loved as a child that his father threw away and replaced with a baseball cap and then when he "lost" the baseball cap his father bought him the exact same one again

Edit 3:

*** i was 100% sure i was going to get mc to stick with najuma (dorky mischevious goth who is so so bad at flirting hello!!!?) but i got caught by "sad & shy with serious self-worth issues hidden badly behind an overconfident exterior (who blushes & gets flustered easily because he so rarely receives genuine praise/compliments) experiences postive regard for the first time and loses his shit" for the third fucking time

Edit 4:

Okay but why does Dylan get (rightfully) called out by everyone in S4 for all the bullshit he does to MC from blatantly lying to her to not listening when she says "No" But in S5 when Suresh (admittedly, more subtly) pulls off the same shit no one says anything, even MC's "friends" don't believe her.

In S2 when Luke/Henrik gets a little too forceful after MC says no, he gets called out by MC's partner and immediately apologises

In S4 when Dylan does the whole "stop pretending you don't want me" routine after MC rejects him multiple times, the rest of the islanders band together and basically chase him off the island

In S5 when Suresh pulls literally the same thing from the very first episode itself but none of the other islanders believe MC, and Suresh keeps getting to do this until almost the very end while also managing to constantly play hot & cold with MC and chase away all of MCs other romantic interests

[fics-n-stuff-n-stuff]

Natsu Dragneel/Lucy Heartfilia

Gray Fullbuster/Juvia Lockser

Levy McGarden/Gajeel Redfox

Alternate Universe - Modern with Magic Follows Fairy tail but with my own twists set in modern day Fluff and Angst Romance Friendship developing feelings Lucy has new spirits I checked constellations and gave her ones I thought were cool I am going to go all the way to Tartaros and hopefully Alvarez arc but we will see how it goes I Will Go Down With This Ship I will add tags as I go Out of Character probably because it is an AU

———

Lucy is thrown into a world she didn’t know existed. Join her as she unravels this new world full of magic that brings adventure, romance and destruction along with it.

———

Just a modern re-telling of Fairy tail following its arcs with a few twists and turns along the way💞

You can also read it here

————————————————

Chapter 23

Waking up Lucy felt heavy, disoriented, and cold down to her very bones.

Accompanying all of that was a pounding in her head that was worse than the one time Cana got to her at one of the Fairy Tail pre-Christmas parties and shoved a whole barrel of wine down her throat.

Her memory was hazy as she slowly woke up, barely able to recall anything, and everything felt distant in a way, she couldn't remember what happened, where she was, or the reason behind feeling like someone ran her over and then locked her in a freezer.

There were almost too many sensations surrounding her, but three stood out the most and so she tried focusing on them in an attempt to ground herself.

Her magic tingling in her veins and her chest was the first, fainter than it's been since the seal placed on it blew up on her in the middle of the guild, leaving her feeling almost empty and cold, the second was accompanying her magic, it was a curious bubbling sensation spreading through her body, somehow soft and cozy.

It was like a gentle kernel of flames that reminded her of Natsu and how she always felt safe with him close.

The third was the warmth enveloping her right hand, the wonderful feeling climbing halfway up her arm and making her even more aware of how cold the rest of her was.

Lucy tried to move, to open her eyes and move closer to the source of warmth but her limbs felt so incredibly heavy and in the end, the simple task was harder than it should've been.

It took a few struggled tries, and one twitched jerk before she was blinking away the heaviness behind her eyes.

The pounding in her head was worse now that her eyes were open, and her memory was still so hazy and disoriented, and if she tried to think her head would feel like it was going to explode.

Blinking through the haze Lucy noted that the room she was in was dark, thankfully, and she noticed immediately that it wasn't her own.

As she looked around slowly she could barely register that she was in a spare guild room. Turning her head towards the source of the warmth, Lucy spotted Natsu folded awkwardly in a chair next to the bed.

Fast asleep holding her right hand tightly.

Lucy smiled softly at Natsu's sleeping form before scrunching her eyes closed for a moment, hoping it would help with her growing migraine.

It seems that just moving her head triggered more pain.

She unconsciously squeezed the hand holding hers and let out a small groan as a wave of pain assaulted her and it caused Natsu to jerk awake at the sudden sound.

"Huh?" His eyes were glazed as he blinked at her in shock, he was half asleep making Lucy giggle softly as she opened her eyes so she could look at him.

The world was fuzzy as she blinked rapidly and tried to focus on the pink-haired man.

Lucy felt like she would slip back into sleep at any moment but the sight of the front piece of his hair sticking up at an odd angle making him look just a little ridiculous made her feel light and warm in a strange way.

"Luce." The word was breathed out somewhere between a sigh of relief and a prayer and he stared at her for several moments without saying anything, scanning her face intently as if in disbelief, and then suddenly he was letting go of her hand as he stood up and moved out of her reach.

The loss of contact made Lucy want to protest, the words getting stuck in her throat, and before she could rein herself to say anything Natsu was speaking as he moved almost frantically around the room. "I need to go tell Wendy you're awake, we need to call the old witch or Mira, she could make some food if you're hungry or maybe some water would be better, shit why didn't I have that ready? What time is it anyway?"

He started rambling and moving through the room heading towards the door intent on going out and getting someone, but Lucy paid no attention to his words, the moment he let go of her hand it was like her only source of warmth left, and with every step he took to leave she was left shaking like a leaf from the cold.

"No."

The word came out a little rattled and it made Natsu stop in his tracks. "Don't go, please." He turned his head from where he was making his way to the door, stance rigid and stiff as he looked at her with a pinched expression that any other time she would've found cute, but right now she just wanted him next to her. "It's, I'm..." Lucy stammered for a moment not really sure how to phrase her thoughts in this exhausted state.

Could one feel dizzy while lying down?

"The room is freezing cold, so get your ass back here."

She tried to sound stern and confident as she spoke, hoping it would lighten the somber mood that seemed to have taken over her usually sunny partner for some reason, but it came out a little shaky and through clanking teeth despite her best efforts.

Natsu's whole demeanor shifted for a second shoulders tightening and fists clenching at his sides, and if she wasn't concentrating on him she would have missed it, she watched as he faltered for half a second more before turning his body a full 180 degrees, and walking his way back to her bed, sitting down in the chair, shoulders slumped and head bowed.

He didn't say a word as he sat, didn't even look at her or reach to hold her hand again, and it was a little odd, Lucy thought through her haze.

He was acting odd.

Not like himself at all. Where was her silly fire drakon? And what has brought up this forlorn state?

"That's not really helping. I don't know why but I feel like it's below zero in here." Lucy said instead of prodding into his strange behavior feeling like he wasn't going to share anything with her at the moment but not knowing how she could possibly feel such a thing. So she focused on shifting in the bed as she spoke, trying to make room in the queen-sized bed.

Usually when she was cold, being anywhere 5 meters around him would solve the issue quickly, especially if the present drakon was aware that she was cold. Natsu always increases his heat when she's cold, Lucy could feel him doing it now, as well, but this time it wasn't enough.

Not like his touch had been.

It's like a numbing chill had settled into her bones in a way that left her feeling like she'll never be warm again.

Lucy was still very new to this whole magic thing, but it felt like this was a magical kind of cold she was feeling. Did she accidentally get hit by one of Gray's attacks? Or did someone else attack her with a freeze spell of some kind?

That would explain so much.

Her memory was too muddled and out of focus, and the more she tried to think, the worse her migraine got.

The snap of his neck as he turned to look at her sounded painful, but the look on Natsu's face at her words would have been almost comical if she wasn't so worried and tired, he looked perplexed, despondent, and stressed at the same time and she wondered what could've happened to put him in such a state.

Did Fairy Tail get attacked again?

Because this wasn't the first time she had been injured since they met.

Hell, that was how they met, but there was something different about his demeanor this time around. Even half dazed and out of it Lucy could tell something was really bothering him, and maybe Gray really did hit her with an attack, if it's got him acting all broody and silent.

And she'd never known him to be this quiet.

Not around her.

Not since the day she opened her eyes in a room similar to this one, to him sitting in a chair next to her bed as he is now.

The scene was so similar,

yet so painfully different at the same time.

"Will you just come here?" Lucy said with a huff as he continued to just stare wordlessly at her.

She shuffled even more, somewhat awkwardly, to the other side of the bed with her heavy limbs and this time unfurled the blanket as she did, making her intention clear and indicating for him to join her.

Natsu sat still as stone in the chair, gaze fixed on the empty spot on the bed where she was lying just moments before. His eyes moved to look back at her and the empty spot a few times, the expression in them made her feel even more confused.

He looked dejected and exhausted.

When she pushed herself to focus closer, she noticed the dark circles under his eyes and remembered the way his brow was furrowed with worry even in his sleep.

This won't do.

With her newfound observation, Lucy felt even more determined to give the both of them a good night's rest, so she cleared her throat to get his attention and shot Natsu her best 'Don't test me' look.

He was quite familiar with it. In fact, Lucy likes to give him credit for creating it. Because she doesn't think she's ever needed one before meeting him.

"I'm turning into a popsicle over here. If I wanted to be cold all the time, I would've partnered up with Gray instead." She joked, her words coming out slower and maybe a little slurred as she talked, but if she knew one thing about Natsu Dragneel, he always takes the bait.

"Gaah, don't even say stuff like that. Like ice breath could ever keep you safe." He huffed the words out with no real bite to them as he slowly stood from the chair and moved to settle on the bed.

That eliminated her theory about Gray being the culprit to her magical cold.

He hesitated as he stood in the small space between the chair and the mattress, looking between the empty space on the bed and her.

"Are you sure?" His voice was quiet and uncertain, and her chest tightened at the expression on his face.

His movements were a little awkward and unsure as he hovered halfway on the bed and Lucy decided to take pity on him and reached to tug at his hand so she could pull him fully into the bed.

He let out a huff as he tumbled, not expecting the tug, and fell on the mattress with a small bounce.

Lucy watched him as he settled into the bed and it was painfully obvious from his almost rigid posture that someone (probably all the women in Fairy Tail) drilled into him the importance of being mindful and respectful of women and their space, especially in bed.

But this is something that Natsu doesn't usually care about at the best of times, even more particularly when it comes to Lucy's personal space.

Most of the time Natsu liked Lucy's personal space more than his own.

So instead of waiting for him to do something Lucy moved into his space the moment he settled, still half rigidly under the covers, determined to be as far away from her as the mattress would allow.

It was a queen-sized bed and not entirely a tight fit, but she was determined not to have any space between them, so tough luck to him.

She was cold and tired and gods be damned she will be cuddled by Natsu.

So Lucy moved to latch onto Natsu's arm, lifting it so she could shimmy closer and wrapped it around her shoulder so that her whole body was pressed against his, with her head resting on his chest, leg thrown over his and she was practically half sprawled on top of him.

The rhythm of his heart picked up at the contact and the steady rise and fall of his chest accompanied by the instant warmth that enveloped her the moment his arms wrapped instinctively around her lulled Lucy back into sleep before either one of them could utter a word.

* ********* ********** ********** ********* *

The next time Lucy woke up the room was still dark, or dark again, who knows how much time passed?

The warmth she was enveloped in was nice, comfortable, and safe and she never wanted to move from it.

She laid peacefully like that for maybe about ten seconds before her mind caught up with her, and Lucy would've bolted upright in bed if not for the arms wound protectively around her.

The fake job in the Museum.

Leo's key, broken.

The possessed Demon Lady.

Finding a nearly dead Leo in the forest.

Repairing a Spirit Key.

Meeting The King of the Spirit World.

Her mom.

So many emotions and memories hit her at once that she almost wished she hadn't woken up.

Lucy still felt a little weak and heavy-limbed but much better than before, she wasn't as cold or as hazy, and with a quick assessment, she realized that her magic was not as faint as the last time she woke up, but not as nearly present as it usually was.

The kernel of fire was still there too. Settled nicely around her magic, and was interacting almost playfully with her own.

How strange.

It felt so much like Natsu.

What had happened in the clearing after she fainted? The last thing her mind could conjure was the Spirit King telling Leo he could serve out the rest of his punishment as her spirit, and calling her an old friend, before leaving with an ominous message for her and Natsu.

Why were they in the guild, surely he would have taken her back to the inn they booked till she woke up.

How did they end up back in Fairy Tail?

How long has she been unconscious?

And then Lucy recalls Natsu, and his reaction to her waking up.

The relief in his tone and body language, the way he was on his feet in seconds and ready to get Wendy, Porlyusica, and Mirajane no matter the time.

The sadness and worry that seemed to have practically engulfed him.

It must have been bad for him to react like that. She groaned inwardly at the thought. He was going to be even more possessive now, and he was just starting to loosen up on being her shadow.

Her shuffling around must've made him slowly stir awake because the next thing Lucy knew the hands on her waist tightened and she was being pulled even more into his embrace.

"Mmm, you always smell so good." His voice was rough and deep as he spoke, half nuzzling her hair and it made Lucy blush all the way down to her chest at his words and the velvety notes in his tone.

There was a pause after that, where they laid entwined together, his face nuzzled into her hair, and then it seemed like he noticed what he said, and the position they were in because he was scrambling to untangle their limbs and Lucy wanted to laugh at the fear on his face when she looked up at him.

She moved to stop his motions with a hand on his chest pressing down as firmly as she could, not wanting to be left cold and without his touch again.

"I'm glad you think I smell nice even after being unconscious for who knows how long." Lucy mused teasingly, her voice she noticed as she settled her head on his chest was even more rough and a little dry and she still felt drained, and for a split second, she wondered if it would be a good idea to succumb to the desire to fall asleep.

'Probably not.' She thinks faintly as her eyes close on their own accord.

"A week." Natsu's voice was small and there were so many emotions behind it that Lucy didn't know where to start, but the words made her head shoot up to look at him, eyes wide and all traces of sleep gone.

A week?

She'd been unconscious for seven whole days?

"Wendy and Mira gave you baths, that's why you don't stink." He added as if an afterthought, but Lucy was too busy staring at him in shock, and she would laugh at him for the absurdity of his statement if she wasn't at a complete loss of words.

"A week? What the hell? What happened?" She asked as she moved so her elbow was on his chest and she could look at him better.

And it seems something in those questions made him snap. Suddenly, there was a surge of anger and despair coursing through her, and Lucy knew it wasn't her own.

The feeling was stronger than ever. And she noticed, faintly that every part of them that is touching is accompanied by a pleasant burning sensation, like that one time he covered her in his flames to protect her.

Only this time, there were no actual flames.

Just the fire in his gaze as he glared at her.

Which was a look that wasn't unknown to Lucy, but it had never been thrown in her direction until now.

Shit.

It must have been pretty bad.

'Duh you idiot, if it wasn't bad you wouldn't have been unconscious for a week!' She thought to herself and cringed at her stupidity.

"What happened?" His voice came out as a growl, half accusing and half in disbelief as he moved swiftly to sit up in bed, and Lucy followed suit a little slower, settling against the headboard with a pinched brow and wide eyes as she stared at him, a little shocked by his reaction.

Natsu took several deep breaths, hands fisting the bed sheets as he tried to calm himself.

"What Happened?" He repeated the question after several seconds of silence, the words quieter this time, almost getting caught in his throat as his eyes unfocused and all the anger and fight seemed to leave his body as he slumped slightly, shoulders folding into himself.

And Lucy's heart dropped at the sight, this was wrong. He looked wretched, and that was not something she ever wanted to see.

Natsu should be brassy, boisterous, loud, cocky, fun, and full of life. Not this almost dispirited and troubled man next to her.

And it made Lucy scared to think what could have resulted after her passing out to put him in such a state.

There was a beat of silence, where all she could feel was the fury of emotions flowing from her partner and she couldn't make sense of any of it.

"You almost fucking died in my arms, is what happened Lucy." He was shaking as he spoke, and Lucy felt her heart drop into her stomach, heart pounding in her ears at his words. She noticed, faintly, that his voice was thick with emotion, and he couldn't look her in the eyes as he said them.

"I- I-..." Was the only response Lucy could conjure with her head spinning from his revelation, but Natsu kept talking before she could get a coherent sentence out, or process his words.

'I almost died?' Was seemingly the only she could think of, the words echoing inside her head.

"I had to watch and feel as your magic and life slowly faded away, and it was the worst fucking thing I have ever had to witness." He looked at her then, and she saw the tears and despair in his eyes and it left her speechless.

Gods, no wonder he looks and feels so unsettled.

"What? I mean how? What?" It seemed as if her brain stopped working completely and Lucy didn't know what to think, what to say to such a proclamation, and she definitely didn't know how to process the information.

How did it come to that? She remembers feeling drained and tired after fixing Leo's key, and then everything went black.

But almost dying? Besides a hell of a headache, the fact that she felt a little lethargic and her magic being fainter than usual she felt fine.

She might need a few days to sleep it off, but the look on Natsu's face, the intensity of his gaze, and the despair that seemed to be pouring out of him tell Lucy that he is in no way pulling her leg on this.

Not that she thinks he would ever pull such a cruel joke on her, still, it would be better than facing the fact that she almost joined her mother.

"After Stache face went back and time picked up again you collapsed in my arms and I co- I could feel it..." He trailed off as his voice choked at the end, avoiding her eyes once more and all Lucy could do was stare in disbelief as he spoke.

She'd never seen him like this.

"Natsu-" she started shuffling closer to him in an attempt to comfort him, her hand reaching out to squeeze his, not really knowing what to say but knowing she had to say something when suddenly the door flew open and Mira walked in with a tray of food.

"I didn't want to wake you earlier, you looked dead on your feet last night, but it's almost past noon, so I thought to bring you something to eat at least-" Her sentence was cut off and she almost dropped her tray as she saw Lucy awake.

Natsu and Lucy didn't comically jump to move away from each other at her arrival, but she did pull her hand back with another soft squeeze to his before letting go.

"Lucy!" Mira exclaimed as she quickly moved closer to the bed, placing the tray on the bedside table with a clank and moving so she could pull Lucy into a tight hug.

"You're awake." The white-haired mage mumbled into her hair as she squeezed her tighter and Lucy let out a small huff of breath.

"Oi! Careful with her, she can't breathe with ya squeezing her like that." Natsu's voice carried from behind her and she felt the warmth as he took her shoulders in his arms and pulled her back into his chest.

Mira pulled away from the bed, looking like she was going to say something before she analyzed the scene in front of her and the position they were in, the fact that they were in bed together she raised a brow at them, lips curling up into one of her deadly smirks as she looked between.

"Sorry, I'm just happy to see her finally awake." Mira said as she moved to hand Lucy a glass of water. "You gave us quite a scare, we were all so worried."

"Thanks." Lucy said to the older mage as she took the glass from her and drank half the glass in one gulp.

To say she felt dehydrated would be an understatement.

"I'm gonna leave the food here there's more than enough for you to share, I went a bit overboard this morning. I have to go tell everyone you're awake, and call Porlyusica." She said as she moved around the room, opening the curtains to let the light in before making her way towards the door in a hurry.

"Mira," Lucy called out before the mage could leave. "Please tell them I'm not feeling up to talking or seeing anyone yet, my head is killing me but besides that I'm good! So there's really no need to call Porlyusica! I feel fine." She said with a smile aimed at the older girl and Mira in return frowned at her words, gaze flickering to Natsu for a split second before settling on her with a hard look.

"You are not 'fine' Lucy, you almost died!" She felt Natsu flinch at the older mages words and moved to squeeze his hand.

And as she did, the curious burning sensation was back, creeping wonderfully up her arm.

"And the old witch said to call her the moment you woke up, so that's what I'm going to do, no arguments." She turned around to exit not giving her a chance to get a word in, and Lucy could tell she was a bit pissed and a lot worried.

"But I won't let anyone else come in."

"Happy can come." She called out seconds before the door closed because she wanted to see the blue fur ball he was probably worried, and she knew he would bring Natsu comfort as well.

Lucy turned to look back at the pink-haired man next to her, he was staring at the door with a small furrow to his brow, shoulders tight and fists clenched as he turned to look at her.

Not glaring this time, or filled with sadness. Just determination and intensity.

"We need to talk." He said before she could get a word out and ask about his sudden change in mood, her heart thundered in her chest at his words.

"About what?" She asked cautiously, not knowing where the conversation could go at this point.

Is there something worse than finding out you almost died?

"About what?" He chuckled as he repeated her question and turned his gaze around the room before settling back on her.

"About whatever the hell connection we seem to share, Luce. About how in the hell I can feel you whenever you're near, or in danger, or falling off a goddamned tower!" He rattled out, sounding frazzled, and maybe a little scared and Lucy felt her heart stop as he spoke.

"You, you can feel it too?" She questioned quietly, not entirely shocked he could, but they'd never talked about it, so she never knew for sure if he could feel it, or if it was just her. Lucy couldn't believe they were actually acknowledging this unspoken bond that had been building since they met.

Why was he choosing to talk about it now? Or better yet, why hadn't she tried to before? It is something that she has cherished, something that has saved her and plagued her since they met.

In truth, Lucy knew that it was because she was scared. Scared that he would laugh it off and tell her she was crazy, and no he doesn't feel any weird bond. Or that he would say that he could, and she didn't know which one scared her more.

What did he say earlier about feeling her dying? It was unimaginable for her, incomprehensible. The weight of that statement shook her to her core, the implication that something like that was a possibility between them was frightening.

She never wanted to experience such a thing.

She was pulled out of her thoughts by the humorless chuckle that escaped her partner.

It sounded strange coming from him, and she didn't like it, he should never sound like that.

His laughs should always be boisterous and carefree, not whatever this is.

"Yes. I feel it too. I felt it the day I found you in that alley as you almost got drained by that Leithfold, and it's only great when you're on your own with your own stronger with every fucking day we spend together. And then-" He cut off, breathing hard and eyes wild as he looked at her, and Lucy was assaulted by an array of emotions that seemed to be pouring out of him it made her head spin.

"And then I had to feel it fading, feel you fading in my arms in that god's forsaken clearing and I thought I might just fade with it. It was, it was horrible Lucy. You were so pale, so cold, and, and I didn't know what to do." He was shaking again, his fists clenching and unclenching methodically on top of the covers, his voice was quiet and hitched every so often as he talked and Lucy almost started crying as he spoke.

She could imagine him in those moments, what were almost her final moments, breathing hard and panicking, worse than he is now, calling her name and trying to wake her.

Lucy watched him as he tried to control his breathing and fail, and she pushed her tears away so she could move and catch one of his hands, bringing it to her chest so he could feel her breathing pattern. "Match my breath." She said as she took deep steadying breaths, hoping it would help center him.

She had time to cry and process everything later, she also had a feeling there was more to the story and it left her wondering how bad her migraine was gonna be by the end of it.

Noticing how her chest pleasantly burned where he touched, she wondered what prompted this new sensation between them. She didn't mind it, but it was curious and unknown.

Natsu's eyes were wide and full of unshed tears, probably mirroring her own as he worked on calming his breathing, his chest slowly following the rise and fall of her own.

"I did something stupid." He said after he got his breath to steady, head turned to the side as he moved his hand away from her and scooted to the right so that they weren't pressed against each other. He was avoiding her eyes again.

His words surprised her and left her feeling slightly uneasy.

There was something in the tone of his voice as he said it, and it made her wonder what more he was about to tell her. Natsu never minded doing stupid things, so what the hell was this about?

"How stupid?" Lucy asked, softly and half cautiously as she waited for him to turn and look at her. "I'm not sure yet. That's what we need the old whitch for. Even she was shocked by it."

His explanation was vague, to say the least, and Lucy knew she would need to pry it out of him.

"What did you do?" She decided to ask directly, trying to keep her tone even, if not a little curious and nonaccusatory, and the question made him turn to look at her, eyes unsure and posture tense.

"I, I don't know how to describe it. It all happened so fast and like it was in slow motion at the same time. I was panicking, trying and failing to think of something, anything I could do to help as I watched and felt your magic, your life fade away from you." There was a twist to his lips as he spoke and Lucy felt her heart breaking at his words, as she tried and failed to imagine his panic and desperation in those moments. "I'm no healer, Luce, you know destruction is more my thing." He shook his head and moved a hand to ruffle his hair as he took a deep steading breath.

And all Lucy wanted was to wrap herself around him and not let go for at least a week. He had been living in a suspended state of sorrow for the past seven days and all she wanted to do was comfort him.

But she found herself hesitating, they needed to have this conversation first.

"I somehow managed to give you a little part of my magic, or at least that's what I wanted to do, like a kickstart to stop yours from fading away until I could get you to Wendy. But something else happened, or something weird happened. And I somehow created a bridge I guess? between our magic..." He trailed off. "And now, now I can feel your magic flowing through me, and the bond or whatever, it feels different. Stronger."

There was a moment of silence and Lucy's brows were furrowed and head pounding as she watched him, shocked and with a rapidly growing migraine.

It was all too much for her at the moment.

Was this the reason behind the new and playful kernel of fire inside her? It really was Natsu, that's why it felt like him, and the warm sensation whenever they touched, like an extension of his power.

"What does that mean?" Her voice was small as she spoke and Natsu took a ragged breath before answering.

"You were going to die." He said quietly, as if saying it louder would make it happen all over again. "The same way your mom did, from exhausting your magic." The words were almost choked out of him and Lucy felt herself gasp at the admission, chest tightening and her hands were shaking slightly at the words.

Leo said her mom only survived for those few years because he was there to help her with the spell.

So that would mean, does that mean she was going to die too? Will she be forced to watch herself fade away slowly and painfully the way Layla did?

"Leo was furious, and I was scared out of my mind, desperate to do something. So I tried to concentrate my magic and somehow give a little bit of it to you, to help replenish yours. I don't even know what I wanted to do, give it like a kick start or something, so I could keep you alive until I could get back to the guild and get you proper help."

Lucy watched him as he spoke, his hands fidgeting and moving to run through his hair every few seconds, there was still a slight shaking to them. His voice was strained and his shoulders slumped.

She wondered idly how many times he had to retell this.

Wondered how the guild reacted to the news and hoped that no one was hard on him because of what happened.

"And it worked, and I got you back to the guild, where that cranky witch said we need to wait for you to wake up before she can tell us what the hell happened. And now.." He trailed off and turned to look at her, expression tight and desperate. "Can you feel it?" Natsu asked quietly.

"Can you feel my magic? I can feel yours, it feels tingly and bright, just like you." Lucy watched him as he touched his chest, squeezing his shirt over his heart as he looked at her.

"I-" She started, going to say that she could always feel him in one way or another. That she knew he was going to be there that day she threw herself out of the tower, that she could always tell what kind of mood he was in without even looking at him, and that yes, she could feel his magic flowing through her.

Warm, soft, and playful, making her feel safe, but her sentence was cut off by the door opening and a blue fur ball launching itself into her chest yelling. "Lushiiiiiiii!"

"Oof." Lucy breathed out as she caught Happy in her arms and hugged him. "You're awake!! You scared us Lushii, you've been sleeping forever, and Natsu was so mopey without you, and a little scary. Don't ever sleep so long ever again."

Lucy let out a small laugh at the exceeds cries, turning her head so she could look at Natsu, who was still a bit tense but was looking at the pair with a small, soft smile on his face.

"I promise, I'm sorry for scaring you both." She said as she kept her gaze on her pink-haired partner before turning back to the exceed. "But I'm feeling much better, and don't worry we'll be going out on jobs before you know it." Lucy said with a smile as she scratched between his head.

"Maybe we can all go fishing when the weather gets warmer." Happy chirps out as he moves from Lucy's arms to sit between her and Natsu's knees.

"Sure, maybe you'll even catch something while I'm there." She said cheekily, making the exceed laugh. "Natsu's the one who can't wait for the fishies to come to us!" Happy mocked the fire drakon and managed to get a slight huff of laughter from him.

The tension in the room was still there, but Lucy didn't need to glance at Natsu to know that he felt at peace for the first time in a week with her and Happy in the room and it made her heart ache.

Lucy didn't know how to process what he'd told her and still didn't know the whole of it. Waiting for Porlyusica to come so they could have the full picture seemed like the only option, but Lucy was a little scared at what more they would find out. Sneaking a glance at Natsu from the corner of her eye she thought of what he went through by seeing her like that, she couldn't imagine what seeing, and feeling something like that would be like.

The way Mira looked at him earlier, and Happy's comments on his behavior while she was unconscious it was more than obvious how affected he was by it.

She would've been wrecked if the roles were reversed, and she never wants to be in a position like that.

Lucy knows that they will need to continue their conversation as soon as possible, she had so many questions and still had this overwhelming desire to embrace him that she kept pushing down. It was not the moment for such a thing.

There still seemed to be a hesitance in him when it came to her and her touch, something that was unnatural for the duo but she didn't want to push him or make him uncomfortable.

Shaking those thoughts away Lucy turned to take the tray off the table and moved so she could place it between her and Natsu. "Did Mira call the old witch yet?" The drakon asked Happy.

"She did, Wendy's waiting for her so they can come together." The exceed answered as he moved to try and steal a piece of bacon from the tray which reminded Lucy of how hungry she was so she moved the tray of food on her lap and elbowed Natsu.

"Let's eat before they get here." She says with a smile and gestures to the food.

It was a testament to how shaken he was by all of this, that he didn't immediately devour it the moment Mira walked in with the tray.

* ********* ********** ********** ********* *

In the end, they didn't have to wait long, by the time they managed to finish their breakfast and for Lucy to freshen up, Mira was back in the room with pink and blue heads following closely behind her.

"Took you long enough to wake up, you foolish girl." The old witch said in greeting and Lucy smiled awkwardly at her from the couch they moved on after eating, not really knowing what to say at the accusation.

It's not like she wanted to be unconscious for a week.

"Child, why don't you check over the drakon, look for what I described last time. I'll take the star child." The pink-haired witch said to Wendy, moving towards Lucy without wasting any more time with pleasantries.

There was a hum of magic as her hands made contact with Lucy's cheeks. She could feel the probing and assessing of Porlyusica's magic around her own as she watched the old witch's face.

There was a furrow in her brow as she concentrated on whatever she was doing, but it wasn't the usual one she had on, filled with annoyance, no this one was different. Lucy couldn't quite read the old woman, she was a bit of an enigma, but if she had to guess it was somewhere between wonder and maybe a touch of concern.

It was hard to tell.

They spent almost an hour just fussing over them, poking and prodding their magic, muttering spells under their breath, that usually ended with scowling more often than not.

Lucy tried to free her mind and think of something else, but the only thing she could concentrate on was Natsu, the room was silent as the two healers did their job and all Lucy could focus on was the heat that was radiating from next to her, the way the kernel in her chest seemed to glow brighter when she focused on it, how her own magic reacted to it.

It was a strange feeling, but absolutely thrilling and wonderful. Natsu's magic was playful and wast, warm and all-encompassing. The more she explored this new connection, the stronger her magic seemed to feel.

As if the way it was interacting with his made it strengthen.

The silence was broken by a sudden gasp from the bluenette in front of Natsu, causing Lucy to open her eyes and turn her head so she could look at the pair, only to find Wendy looking back at her, hands still on Natsu's face.

Porlyusica made a sound as she let go of Lucy's face and clicked her tongue as she looked between the pair before turning her gaze to Wendy. "You felt it, then?" She asked the younger mage and Wendy nodded her head in response, but her gaze was still focused on her and Natsu.

Lucy watched them as they talked, hoping one of them would start explaining what they knew, but they seemed content to just stare at them as if they were a puzzle waiting to be put together. So Lucy decided to speak up.

"So, what did Natsu do when he tried to save me?" She asked, voicing the question on most people's minds, because besides Porlyusica, and maybe Wendy, no one knew what the hell happened.

"This thing that you have done, reckless drakon, saved her life. But has also put the both of you at risk." Porlyusica said sternly, half glaring at Natsu as she spoke.

"What do you mean by that? Does that mean that my magic will return in full? I won't die like," Lucy's sentence started half frantic, but her voice wavered at the end of it as she remembered the image of her mother, pale and sickly lying on the bed smiling at her. It was a genuine smile, but it looked like the small action itself hurt Layla.

"I won't slowly die from magic deprivation?" She finished instead of her original thought, casting a quick look at Natsu, who slowly moved so he could slink his hand over the back of the couch, and over her shoulder.

Lucy let out a small breath as her nerves settled with the newfound warmth that followed his touch.

"No child, it seems that his original goal to help replenish your magic worked, it just worked a little too well, and such a thing wasn't even supposed to be possible to accomplish, but here we are..."

She trailed off for a moment as she looked between them, gaze calculating. "The connection you now share has linked your magic together in a way that's almost unheard of, they have weaved together and are sealed so tightly that I'm not sure we could unfurl it even if there was a way."

"So, how? Why? What?" Lucy's head was spinning with the news. Relief washed over her as Porlyusica confirmed that she wasn't going to suffer in the same way her mother did. And more importantly, her friends wouldn't have to watch as she slowly faded.

"How, I'm not entirely certain on that, but I have my theories. Why, I'm not sure I understand the question, and as for what, as I've said it's unlike anything I've ever seen before. Something that's only been written as a part of our history and I believe it's only happened once before." The older mage answered the questions in order and Lucy was more than a little frustrated with a lack of answers, why was she giving vague statements and explanations when she clearly knew what was going on?

"So, someone else in history tried to do something similar? And as for the why, it was a why did it work?" Lucy decided to avoid confrontation, for now, not wanting to antagonize the scary old witch when she was helping them.

"Not exactly, but it was quite similar. And as for why it worked, well that question goes hand in hand with the how. I have my theories on that as well." The pink-haired witch sighed as she ran a hand through her bangs.

"Are you going to share these theories with us?" Lucy asked, not hiding the annoyance she felt at the older mage and the way she seemed to be vehemently avoiding giving them concrete answers.

"Not yet, I think some more research is in order. This is quite a peculiar situation, you can never know what to expect from Makarov's brat's." There was an almost fond look in her eyes as she said that.

"I- I could feel it." Natsu said suddenly, voice quiet and tight, he had been silent this entire time and the sound of his hoarse voice cut through the air, almost startling everyone in the room with his addition to the conversation. "Feel what?" The pink-haired healer inquired as she turned her gaze from Lucy to Natsu, who in turn lifted his head so he could glare at her.

"I could feel her dying. Like I could little feel a pain growing in my gut as she was fucking fading in my arms." He managed through grit teeth, the hand next to her shoulder was gripping the back of the couch tightly and Lucy's head was pounding again, the migraine making itself known.

"Why could I feel it?" His voice hitched as he asked the question and Lucy moved to hug him like she'd wanted since they started talking after Mira left the room this afternoon. All the reservations she had evaporated and the way he sagged in her hold made her feel a bit relieved, Natsu dropped his head in the crook of her elbow as she held him against her side.

Turning to look at the older pink-haired mage Lucy found the expression on her was slightly bewildered but ignored it. "Why is this happening to us, and not just now, even before Natsu did this, there was something between us." Lucy pushed, not caring about revealing such a thing to more than just the witch.

There was a gasp from what she was sure was Wendy, but everyone else stayed silent.

"You know something, and it's more than just a 'theory'. It's about us, it will be affecting us. We need to know." Lucy almost pleaded with the older woman, hoping she could see how much this whole situation had wrecked them already.

The pink-haired woman's brow furrowed at the question and she let out a tired sigh as she brought two fingers to pinch the bridge of her nose, before answering with two simple words that tilted Lucy's world on its axis.

"Soul mates"

Lucy stiffened at her words, and suddenly she was hyperaware of every point of her body that was touching Natsu. It felt like her body was on fire and she didn't know how to react.

He stiffened as well, and their heads shot to look at each other at the same time, eyes wide and disbelieving as their gazes met.  Their faces were close to each other, due to their side embrace and they just stared at each other for a moment. Brown on Green.

The room was silent and filled with an awkward air as the pink-haired witch said those words.

Soul mates?

Lucy could feel the onslaught of emotions coming from her partner in addition to her own. Jumbled and tangled together and so hard to distinguish which was whose. And she didn't know which one of them moved (Both of them did) but suddenly there were at least twenty cemeteries from each other.

Which may not be a lot. But by their standards, they might as well be on the opposite sides of the room. Lucy could feel both Mira and Wendy looking at them, the former with a skeptical frown and a look in her eyes that resembled glee, and the latter slightly shocked and blushing.

"Soul mates?" Natsu managed to mutter out in question as he turned to glance at Lucy for a split second.

"The concept of soul mates goes back to the very first traces of magic in our world. Some even go far as to theorize that the first mages to ever practice the craft were soul mates. But having one, meeting them... The records of it happening have been few and far between. There is not much known in truth." The witch explained, sounding almost somber as she paced the room.

"The most well-known fact about them is that if a pair were to meet and form a close relationship, whether romantic or otherwise if one dies, the other is left changed, broken, and forever forced to feel the loss of half of their soul. Which is what I'm guessing you were feeling when Lucy started to fade."

The mood of the room shifted from dreary to downright depressing at that revelation, and Lucy dared a glance at Natsu, whose gaze was focused on the floor, hands clenching and unclenching on his knees.

"But the type of bond that the two of you have managed to form. What Natsu has done in his desperate attempt to save your life..." the woman trailed off with a sigh. "I fear that with the connection you share now if one of you were to die, the other would soon follow. For it is as I said, your magic has entwined so profoundly that I'm not sure anything could sever it, not even death."

[tiredf-o-u-r]

Smoke Me Out, Please.

Sweet little one-shot where Shane and Male Farmer abuse substances and get together, my first post on ao3 OR read under the cut ;)

Fandom: Stardew Valley

Pairing: Shane x Male Player

Rating: Explicit 18+

Warnings: Dubious (intoxicated) consent, alcohol, marijuana, accidental voyeurism, hooking up, frottage, oral sex, hopeful ending <3

Words: 8040

It started with a chance meeting on the pier. They went back to the farmhouse to continue the pity party.

They were sharing everything, Shane’s beers, the farmer’s weed, stories, memories, secrets, until they were sharing the couch, mouths intertwined. It was a shame, really. Shane had spent months burying his feelings for the farmer, no matter how small. He had put in so much work rejecting all his attempts at friendship, all to throw it away in one night.

He pulled back suddenly

“Ah, fuck!” Shane looked at his leg, where a lit piece of ash from the joint in the farmer's hand fell onto his bare leg.

“Shit…” the farmer ashes it properly, then puts it to his mouth again. Shane looked up at him, slightly annoyed, and matched his action by finishing the last swig of his beer. He leaned back on his hands and tipped his head back, looking up at the ceiling and shaking his hair out, sighing through his nose. When he dropped his gaze back to the farmer, even through how buzzed he was, he felt a pang in his heart, like he was crossing a moral line. If only it wasn’t so fun.

“How old dya say again?”

“…23”

Another sigh…

“God, if you’re getting this bent over a few years maybe you really are an old man. It’s not so bad.” The farmer said, amusing himself. Shane just scoffed.

“A few….a dozen….barely a difference at all, huh?”

The farmer took another puff of the joint and put it down so he could start crawling on top of Shane. He let his legs stay open, the farmer filling the space slowly until they were face to face.

“Don’t you want me?”

Shane’s eyes ran all over his face, and he swallowed. Caught out.

“Then what’s the issue…”

The farmer leaned up then, connecting their lips again. Shane leaned on the back of the couch, holding the farmer's face in his hands now and tilting his head to taste him from every direction. The farmer gave it right back, trying his damnedest to run his tongue all around Shane’s teeth, when he wasn’t pliantly accepting Shane’s sloppy, urgent kiss.

“Fuck, Shane…wanna touch you…”

The farmer said, when they pulled back for air. He was grabbing himself, clearly hard. Shane mimicked the move, slowly moving his hand to himself, to find that he was also hard. His eyes shut, lips parting as he gasped. Shane looked back up at his face, still trying to catch his breath from the suffocating kiss.

“I…you…” His hazy eyes flicked between the farmer’s. He looked cocky. It made Shane feel small, here on his couch, in his house, underneath him and completely at his mercy. It was a feeling Shane hated. Being treated like the little man. What he didn’t know was how much the farmer enjoyed it when he told him off. It made winning him over all the sweeter.

“Get the fuck on with it then.”

The farmer wasted no time throwing a leg over Shane’s, so they were basically scissoring, but it got the job done well enough; their clothed boners made contact. He let out an open mouthed moan out right against Shane’s mouth, and started grinding against him hard. The smell of beer on his breath made Shane groan and shove his tongue back in his mouth to get a taste. It was like all his vices were wrapped up in one perfect beauty, begging to have him. He let Shane suck on his tongue, only able to focus on the motion of his hips.

“Gaaaahhhuhhhhh… Shhaanne…don’t make me wait anymore…” the farmer slurred, sticking a hand down his pants to touch himself. Shane enjoyed the show for a moment: the farmer with his eyes closed, breathing hard, hand moving sharply under his pants, sweat pouring from his hairline. Shane sat up, holding the farmers face still with one hand, and licked from his jaw up the side of the farmers face and across his temple, licking his lips after to savor the salty taste. The farmer groaned in disgust, but cut himself short as he was being moved back by Shane’s hands on his hips. Then he was slipping his shirt over his head and laying him back on his back, the sleepy look on his face making Shane hesitate, realizing just how much drunker than himself he was. Shane looked over to the table, and plucked the joint up, puffing on it while he sat back on his knees. He slipped his hoodie off, and started unbuttoning his polo, looking over the farmer’s shirtless body as he took the last few hits off the spliff. It’s not…wrong…if they’re both fucked up, right?

The farmer let his eyelids hang heavy over his blown out irises. He was smirking as he watched Shane loom over him, checking him out and grabbing himself while he smoked. The farmer reached out his hand to stroke Shane’s arm, admiring the muscles he so rarely gets to see.

Shane flicked the rest of the joint away, and moved to continue undressing the farmer. He let him, and even got Shane to remove everything, thanks to the high in his head and dick overpowering his self-consciousness. Once that was done, Shane crawled over him, pushing their dicks together and resting his body weight into it, making them groan in unison at the heavy contact. Shane had his hands planted on either side of the farmer’s head, with the farmer’s fingers delicately holding onto his wrist. He rubbed his hips in a circle, gasping again, and looked down at what he was doing. He had expected something different from being with a man for the first time, but even while watching how his partner’s foreskin stroked over his dick at Shane’s motions, he couldn’t distinguish what was so different between the feeling of his soft skin or a woman’s as long as it was pleasing his dick. The farmer’s increasingly higher pitched noises helped him along. Shane looked back to his face to see it tipped back, sticking his jaw out and exposing his neck completely. Shane dropped to balance on his elbows now, thrusts becoming shorter and faster as he attached his mouth to the farmer’s neck mercilessly. He gasped out suddenly, and his arms flew to grasp at Shane’s back, nails digging into his back; holding on for the ride. Shane was sloppily running his mouth across the farmer’s neck, slobbering all over him and administering pinching bites randomly, drawing out whiny “ah“‘s from the farmer each time. Then Shane was moving down, attaching his lips and teeth to one spot just below the farmer’s collarbone, already bruising the thin skin. The farmer was panting hard and sweating harder, his dick losing contact with Shane’s as he moved down. He continued to grind their bodies together, feeling his insides flip even through the euphoric haze at the feeling of Shane’s hard, leaking dick rubbing against and in between his thighs. His own cock was pressed between them, rubbing against Shane’s soft belly, where the fat there was lovingly molding to the shape of it. His body hair added an interesting texture, something that made the farmer feel hot all over and finally lose patience. He put his hands on Shane’s shoulders and shoved him back, hard. Shane couldn’t help but let his absolute shock play out on his drunken face. Not only at the amount of audacity, but also strength needed for that demonstration; something Shane did not expect from this tryst.

“Fuck, enough, please, just…just come here…” the farmer pulled Shane up with his hands on his ass to align their dicks again. He spit into his hand, and held their dicks together in it, squeezing and then stroking, moaning loud in relief, shamelessly letting his eyes roll back. Shane had his hands pressing into couch again, holding himself up while he straddled the farmer. His mouth was wide open, panting and gasping as their arousals combined. The farmer threw his head to the side, chanting curses as he moved his hand faster and faster. Shane rested his forehead on the farmer’s head, panting right into his ear, and started to tremble.

“Th that’s it…just ah fuck that’s it…”

“Please…please…fuck…”

He started twisting his wrist more and more violently, until Shane cried out, hips twitching forward and muscles clenching as he shot ropes all over them. He kept moaning, getting quieter and weaker as he kept thrusting against his hand though his release. The edge of Shane’s shaking body, wetness from his release, and throbbing dick still pressed against his own brought the farmer to his end, all but growling out a dirty “fuuuuuuck, Shane.” He grunted as Shane finally went completely limp on top of him, head resting next to his. They stayed like that as they drifted off, unwanting and unwilling to break the dreamy atmosphere they created.

.

.

.

.

.

When the farmer woke up in his bedroom, the first thing he registered was the throbbing pain in his head. Then the late morning sun rays warming his face - something he’s never slept in late enough to see. Finally, he rolls onto his back, eyes still closed, and realizes he is sharing the bed with someone. Shit….was only a matter of time….please don’t be someone in this god forsaken town… He worked up the courage to face the person he had forgotten spending the entire night with, taking in the dark raven hair on the back of the man’s head. Did it have a purple tint to it? Shane.

He inhaled sharply and exhaled slowly. Fuck. It just had to be the one person he liked in this town, didn’t it? The farmer whispered,

“Are you awake?”

“…a bit”

The farmer sighed again. He couldn’t place how he was feeling about it all, but he had no intention of touching that now. There was really only one thing he wanted to do before he could decide anything else for the day.

“Sorry…I uh, gotta get up…”

He was getting out of bed, being sure to put the blanket back over Shane’s shirtless body, and started looking around the clothes on his floor for something to wear. Shane sat up on his side, still horizontal, eyes barely open, squinting at the farmers scurrying.

“What’s wrong?”

“Whatddya mean?”

“…sorry to keep you in so late…”

“No! No it’s…it was…I just have to get the daily chores done is all…”

Shane was sitting up more now, surprisingly alert all of a sudden, at the farmers apparent nervousness.

“I could help with the animals- I wouldn’t mind and it’s my f-“

“No, no, it’s…I was gonna do something else first, honestly.” The farmer rubbed the back of his neck, deciding that in his tired state he couldn’t keep up lying much longer- not to him. Shane was looking up at him in confusion, waiting for him to continue. The farmer sighed.

“Meet me outside if you wanna know.”

And he left the room. Shane flopped back down, trying to decode what the hell that meant. His head was beginning to throb; a near daily occurrence these days. It was making it harder for him to think about what the farmer's demeanor could mean. He sat up, rubbing his eyes and scanning the room for any clothes that were his. There were a lot of clothes around…and ashtrays.

When he got himself together and entered the front room, he noticed the front door was left open. He braced himself, and left the house, squinting at the harsh sunlight that hit his face. He started to smell cigarettes, so he followed his nose around to the small patio on the edge of the farm, by the fence. The farmer was there, sat down and leaning against the fence post, lit ciggy between his fingers. He flashed a sad sort of smile at Shane.

“Hey…uh…what’s up?” He said, trying to stay casual. He sat down in the grass, just in front of the small paved patch the farmer sat on. His gaze was cast down, his arms were wrapped around his stomach. “You doin alright…?” In all honesty, Shane was terrified of the answer the second he asked the question.

“I’m okay…this is just normal actually, heh…”

“…oh..?”

“I’m just really sick in the morning these days…” he was putting out his cigarette. Shane was watching the action, and couldn’t help but be reminded of how he felt in the mornings, even right now: like he could go for a drink.

Then the farmer was reaching behind one of the planter pots next to him, pulling out what looked like a yard decoration…or…a vase? Then he was pressing his mouth to the opening, and fiddling with something that was facing him. Shane could hear the lighter click, and some more noise until the farmer lifted his head, blowing smoke away from them.

Oh.

The farmer sighed, and took another deep drag, coughing hard after that one. Something about the bags under his eyes, the practiced ease in his actions, and the cough wracking his skinny body made Shane think that this has been going on long before last night. Then he considered the look on Marnie’s face when she sees him go into his room with another six pack for the night. He didn’t want to cause the farmer that kind of guilt - like someone was watching him take another step on his downward trek, unwilling to offer anything other than a helpless audience to their misery.

“Last night was uh..it was good for me, thank you for that…” The farmer started, carefully eyeing Shane’s face to gauge his reaction.

“Oh, uh, yeah…I…was starting to worry that I shouldn’t have let that happen…but um…I don’t regret it, only as long as you don’t…”

“I don’t regret it.”

“Alright then.”

Shane leaned back a bit, gazing over the property wistfully. Some part of his brain, however, was insisting that not only is it unlikely that this situation isn’t fucked, but also that it would of course be too good to be true. Someone he could talk with, drink with, and sleep with? That simply wasn’t Shane’s luck. He swallowed, looking down, deciding he needed to at least try to make sure.

“You wouldn’t say that if you didn’t mean it, would you? Because I wouldn’t blame you, really, and I wouldn’t tell a soul.” His stomach flipped shamefully, thinking about the farmer’s good reputation, and how badly he doesn’t want to fuck that up for him.

“…No, I don’t think I would. ‘M pretty sure I mean it.”

Shane considered his answer as he watched him take another hit. He coughed sympathetically, remembering the abuse his own lungs went through last night.

“Man…not feeling so great today either…buh…” Shane let his head hang, fingers coming up to rub his temples. When the farmer finished exhaling, he decided to offer his new friend the only coping mechanism he knew how to use.

When Shane looked up, the farmer had come closer to him, sitting right in front of him now, also on the grass. He was holding out his bong for Shane to take. He grabbed it, keeping the neck in his hand but resting the bottom on the ground; genuinely taking the object out of his friend's hand on instinct. It was rather heavy, and his arm immediately dropped when Shane relieved it. He just looked at the multicolored glass bong that was tilted up facing him, considering the offer. He bit the inside of his cheek, debating himself in his head. But when it really came down to it, all Shane’s degenerate brain could consider were two possibilities: leave, and drink alone until it’s time for work; or stay here, with the farmer, smoke his weed, and see where it takes him. He looked up at the farmer again. His eyes looked sleepy again, inviting. He wanted to meet him there.

“Gimme a light then.”

He scooted forward, closer to the farmer, hand high up on the neck of the bong, and watched him reach his arm out again to relight it for him. He lifted the bowl and Shane inhaled hard. The farmer enjoyed seeing Shane bent over holding something so lewdly shaped up to his mouth right over him like this; with the way his eyes were squeezed shut. He coughed out his exhale hard, making the farmer finally crack a grin. Sure Shane could outdrink him, but this was farmer’s territory. He lifted the still-lit bowl again, and Shane followed cue and took another hit, and tried to stifle another embarrassing cough. The farmer brought it to his own mouth then, taking a deep hit and exhaling to the side, watching as Shane sat back up, having caught his breath.

They look at each other hornily. The farmer’s eyes dragged across Shane’s body, lingering around the parts that felt the best under his hands. When his gaze reached his handsome face, he realized Shane was doing the same until they made eye contact. He looked back at the bong.

One hit left.

“Bout enough left for one more…want it?” The farmer offered. The relaxed timbre of his voice made it come out so effortlessly.

Shane relented, against his better judgment, and went to take the bong from the farmer's hand. Except, the farmer tugged it out of his grasp, and motioned for Shane to lean in even closer to him so he could inhale while the farmer held it for him. He was smiling easily: looking a little more comfortable in his own body now that he was under the influence. It made Shane feel something he didn’t want to touch, so against even his better judgment, Shane leaned in to take another bong rip. When his lips aligned with the hole, the farmer slid his hand up to hold the neck higher, finger now gently touching Shane’s unshaven chin. It made Shane instinctively inhale a bit, so he started sucking up the last of the smoke, eyebrows knitting together.

The look ignited the inevitable swell of arousal that the farmer always seems to experience no matter what kind of weed he smokes. He wanted to tell him to look him in the eye while he inhaled like that, just to see it, but the thought was cut short when he felt Shane balance himself against him with his hands on his knees, as he detached his mouth to fully inhale. Then the farmer was letting the bong tip over on the grass next to them, grabbing Shane’s chin and swiftly leaning in to kiss him. When he leaned back, he kept holding Shane’s face close to his like that while he exhaled the cloud of smoke. The farmer opened his mouth and inhaled it straight out of Shane’s mouth, other hand steadying him by the back of his neck now. He sucked Shane’s smoke into his lungs and blew out a substantially weaker cloud away from them.

Shane felt like he had been transported to a different time. A time in his life when he was brave, and alive, and daring, like the man who just pulled that move on him. Luckily, the thc flooding his brain spurred on how hard he was for the farmer in that moment, along with granting him some of his bravery.

The farmer leaned back on his palms to exhale, and take in Shane’s reaction. His mouth was hanging open in awe, hazy eyes locked on the farmer’s mouth, allowing them a moment to catch a good breath before Shane was pinning him to the ground, kissing him ravenously now.

Sighing happily through his nose, the blissed out farmer received Shane’s kisses as best as he could, until his kisses moved from his mouth to his lips to all around his face until he was more or less rubbing his warm, prickly face against his like a cat.

“Mmn~ gonna give me a rug burn?”

Shane pulled back, looking over the farmer's flushed face through his heavy eyelids. The corners of his vision were starting to get hazy, like his partner was the only thing his body could perceive. Through his tunnel vision was the farmer, face framed with the grass he was laying in. Truly a daydream of some upstanding citizen that Shane must have stumbled into. He leaned in, running his lips along his neck, beard still rubbing along the way.

“Something like that…”

Then he was kissing and biting, careless of what may leave a mark, drawing out lovely noises of pleasure from the farmer. It wasn’t long before they were interrupted, however, by a sound from behind them: someone clearing their throat.

“Ahem. Hey boys! Sorry to interrupt…”

A bright voice was cutting through their shared buzz, Robin. She was making eye contact with the farmer when he opened his eyes. Shane’s blood ran cold when he realized they were being caught.

“…but uh…but I just wanted to give you this! I ordered a few too many and wanted to drop it off so…I’ll just leave it here then.” Shane saw her placing the package on the deck as he rolled off the farmer.

“Oh…thanks Robin, that’s so kind.”

The slow cadence of the farmer's voice made Shane think he wasn’t too worried about it. Right now, at least. Robin assured him it was no problem, voice trailing off near the end of the sentence as her eyes caught the bong next to them. Fuck. Shane knew she had an aversion to her sons cigarette smoking, and his partying, so he could only imagine the conclusions she was drawing now as her eyes went between the bong, the red patches around the farmers lips and neck, and finally landing her eyes on him. Her tone changed.

“Hi, Shane. It’s uh…nice to see you’ve made a friend now. Don’t uh…don’t tire him out! Hah…” Robin rubbed the back of her neck and looked away, trying to play off her awkwardness. But something about the new farmer in town reminded her of her own troubled son, so he was now subjected to her mom instincts, however unsure they often were.

“Yeahhh…is that right Shane? ‘M I your special friend?” The farmer was wearing an easy smile, reaching out and petting Shane’s hair. He looked back in absolute shock, unsure at what the farmer could possibly be trying to achieve by this. He fell back on the only defense he had at his fingertips. He flicked the farmers hand away, and huffed, putting on an annoyed voice,

“Yeah yeah whatever. This kid won’t leave me aLONE, Rob, I swear, heh.” He said to Robin, gesturing back toward the farmer. He just smiled harder, and moved to straddle Shane’s leg and hugged him, making them both topple over on the grass.

“You have a lot of special friends, Shane?” He said into his neck, warm breath hitting Shane’s skin as the farmer started rubbing the tip of his nose against his neck to make Shane gasp. It felt like the blood in his veins had been replaced with fire, cold and hot at the same time from not wanting to embarrass them both in front of someone, and much more importantly, express a genuine emotion in front of a live witness.

“Ngh! Stop! Hhhh ‘s not…funny…”

His annoyance made the farmer giggle, the extra breaths only making Shane squirm more. He was sure Robin must be horrified by seeing this tender display, this boy climbing all over him to cuddle like a puppy.

“Right then…I’ll just leave you to it then…” Robin was slowly backing away, not exactly not horrified, but only out of surprise. Maybe Shane had more heart in him than she ever gave him credit for. And that farmer…I just hope they’re okay…

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“UGH. What’d you do THAT for, then?!”

Shane was still laying back on the grass, covering his eyes with his palms now; the farmer rolling off and laying next to him normally again once Robin left.

“Mmm?” He shrugged, looking up at Shane. He shot him a pissed look, as if to say, “the fuck does that mean?” The farmer rolled his eyes. It all made sense to him, and he knew it would to Shane too if he could read his mind. He was just too tangled up inside to figure out how to articulate it right now. He just sighed and got up, walking a short distance and looking in one of his chests before walking back. Shane could hear water sloshing in whatever he was carrying, but didn’t look, keeping his head flat on the ground and aimlessly staring at the sky stubbornly. Until the farmer came into his view, towering above him. He dropped something on the ground, leaning against Shane, and sat down next to him again. Shane raised his head to see the farmer filling the bong with water from his watering can, and repacking a bowl. Then he saw what the farmer left: a bottle of wine. He scoffed, but immediately sat up again.

His leg started bouncing. An obvious tell, but he let himself have it as he considered the farmer’s offer yet again. He was trying to be offended. What, you trying to get me drunk again? I really shouldn’t…I still have work…and I’m already so… the farmer was blowing smoke out, and rested his head back against the fence post again, hand resting on his crotch, drawing Shane’s gaze there. It became impossible for him to not stroke the wine bottle in his hand ever so slightly, not even realizing it.

“Just thought it might make you feel better…’m not trying to trick you or anything.”

The farmer mumbled after a few more moments of Shane just staring at it. He felt a small jolt of excitement when he heard him pop the cork and take a swig. Soon Shane was sitting with his back on the farmhouse, leaning in for the farmer to give him another hit from his bong. Shane willingly accepted the kiss/inhale trick when the farmer pulled it again, leaning back and kissing him back slow and deep. Then his hand was holding the back of the farmer's head, keeping their mouths pressed together, while the farmer got as close as possible on his hands and knees.

“D'ya wanna…?”

“Mhm…”

“Kay…” Shane tried to pull them both up to go inside, but the farmer stayed on top of him, yanking at his arm close to keep them there.

“Here?”

A cheeky grin and a nod.

“We can’t do it here…”

“Why not?”

Shane pulled back farther, looking at him confused again.

“You really have a short memory span, don’t you?”

“Do you think she’d come back here unannounced after seeing that? I thought she would THROW UP. Hopefully just everyone knowing you’re here’ll be enough for them to leave us alone…” The farmer said, and moved in to kiss Shane’s neck, which succeeded in his goal of distracting him from being offended, if only slightly.

“Uhgh! What’s that supposed to mean?!”

“You know…”

Shane couldn’t believe the nerve of this guy. And although he purposefully let out an “ah~” to show his approval when he felt the farmer's teeth graze against a pulse point on his neck, he was still resolved to fight his corner. With his hands on the farmer's shoulders, he peeled him off and held him back like their bodies might snap back together like magnets. The farmer wrapped his fingers gently around Shane’s arms which were locked straight, feeling like he was flirting with danger as he stroked Shane’s flexing muscles. His hoodie had been long discarded in the spring heat they were lounging in, displaying Shane’s strong masculine arms again.

“So I’m just that disgusting then, huh? You want me to guard the gate to keep the goodies away and then fuck me when you’re drunk and horny?”

“God Shane just……just stop worrying, ok? I’m not worried about it, you don’t need to worry about it.”

“About what?”

“Whatever the hell you’re worrying about!! It’s fine, Shane, and I don’t see you like that. I’m showing you how I feel. We don’t need to worry about anyone else…okay? You want it and I want it, and it doesn’t affect anyone else, so if we’re only hurting ourselves, then what’s the harm, right? You too good for that now?”

The last question stung enough to make Shane pause, just staring at the farmer’s face trying to force the words through his unwilling brain. The farmer reached his hand out, petting his hair like he did before. Shane’s eyes softened. The accusation made him feel sad, and he let his tired eyes close at the gentle touch. He was tired of holding them in focus, tired of holding himself accountable, tired of everything.

“Don’t wanna hurt you…”

“You won’t…”

“I have…”

“…I don’t care…I just want you…”

The farmer finally succeeded in bringing their mouths back together, so he did his best to put his heart into it. Accommodating Shane’s motions when he kissed back, licking his lips, the high in his head reconnecting with the pleasure in his stomach when he felt Shane’s tongue against his. Shane’s mind was still in a dark swirling storm, but he couldn’t help how his body naturally accepted the farmer’s words, relaxing into his embrace. It felt so right, and he did crave him so badly… He pulled back with a ridiculous smacking sound to speak.

“I wanna make it up to you…”

The farmer’s eyebrow quirked up.

“Yeah? And how do you wanna do that?”

“Whatever you want. I’d do anything…”

Shane’s heart pounded at his final confession. The thought started out innocent, but by the time it left Shane’s mouth was dripping in insinuation. Not to say he didn’t mean it - once the flirtation left his mouth, he felt his mouth water at the ideas that filled his mind.

“Yeah? Anything?”

Shane nodded, and placed another light kiss on his lips.

“Anything.”

The farmer grabbed himself through his pants, saying, “I have a few ideas” and stood suddenly, placing a hand on Shane’s head to keep him trapped against the wall. He groaned in response and looked up while he shifted from sitting to kneeling, back now bending at an uncomfortable angle to keep his head pressed to the wall, now in between the farmer’s legs. Shane’s head was spinning with excitement but he accepted the challenge, however out of his depth he might be. The farmer put his clothed bulge on Shane’s face, rubbing back and forth in response to the way Shane moaned and nuzzled against him obediently. Shane’s face started burning with embarrassment, and he wished he was a lot more drunk than he currently was. He was really gonna remember this. Shane had one hand braced on the farmer’s thigh, and the other one palming himself as he let the farmer keep grinding his face. It was getting hard to breathe with how he was pressing the side of his cock hard on his mouth, and Shane started to hope the farmer didn’t expect too much of him as he gasped for breath in between thrusts. He gave him some space to breathe when Shane put both hands on his thighs and pushed him away, sucking in a lungful of air.

“Fuck…that, that was too much…”

“That was so hot…” The farmer took a few steps back to give Shane some space, and took his cock out to start jerking it to full attention. “I’ll go slow…”

“Uh, yeah you will.”

The farmer bit his lip, trying to conceal how excited he was that Shane was still willing, thinking he may have gone too far letting himself lose control like that. Shane had his hand under his pants once he was steady, looking at the farmer pump himself as he did the same. It was working for him; and he did want to try it, he was just wholly unsure if he would be able to please him how he needed, being so inexperienced in sucking dick. The thought of how he already almost suffocated on it before he was even out made Shane have to remove his hand from himself to not start jerking at full force.

“Fuck man, I…I don’t know if I can do this-”

“Shhhh yes you can…”

The farmer cooed, stepping forward and placing his thumb against Shane’s lips until he opened his mouth, accepting the tip of the digit inside.

“Don’t worry sweetheart, you can do it…”

“No, I just mean… ‘nother drink might help…”

Shane’s eyes sparkled up at him as he spoke, eager to please, even going back to sucking on his thumb after he spoke. He felt cheap asking for it on his knees in front of this man, but hey, if the ends justify the means…The farmer scoffed in amazement.

“Yeah…yeah…just try to relax, that’ll help.”

He backed up again to allow them some space, patting the various pockets on his body until it hit the pocket on his chest. He pulled out something thin and white. He stuck it in his mouth and lit the end with a lighter, inhaling and exhaling a puff of smoke. Oh. He leaned down to place the joint in Shane’s mouth for him before he walked off to rummage through more chests. When he returned, he swapped the joint for another bottle, handing it to Shane and taking a hit.

They lost track of time between then and when the farmer found himself lying flat on his front, hands around Shane, leaning up to kiss him. Their shared buzz had blossomed into a thick high. The skin under their clothes where they were pressed together was getting sticky and damp as the morning turned to noon. They broke for air, and Shane leaned his head back on the farmhouse wall again, groaning when he felt the farmer slide down and rest his head directly on Shane’s dick. With the full weight of his head resting on it, he nuzzled his head, then turned to start pressing his lips and nose against his bulge.

“Hhhh-Hah…that’s….”

“Yeahhh…”

The farmer drew out the last word, blowing out as much hot breath over his thin gym shorts as he could. It made Shane’s stomach muscles flex hard, making him sit up more, looking down with his mouth open, eyes red and heavily lidded.

“Fuck, dude…”

“Yeah? You want it?”

“Yeahhh~”

The farmer kissed him again, licking into his mouth however he pleased, Shane’s tongue struggling to keep up until he pulled back enough to speak. “Lemme suck you off…then I’ll take that apology. How ‘bout that?”

“Mhm~” Shane moaned out, nodding enthusiastically.

The farmer slid his hand up to grab Shane’s dick.

“Get it out.”

Shane scrambled for his waistband, pulling down his shorts enough for his dick to pop out. He braced his hands on the ground, gripping the grass between his fingers. He could feel the blades of grass on his bare ass as well, prickly and a bit uncomfortable, but it reminded him of where they were and just how exposed he was in this moment, how willing he was to push his own limits and try something new for the farmer’s sake, but he let himself blame the substances clouding his brain for that. The farmer placed his hands on Shane’s bare thighs, leaned down and put his mouth on Shane’s cock, appreciating how his entire body jolted up a little in time with his desperate groan. He rubbed it with his parted lips up and down, then wrapped his lips around it and took the head onto his tongue. He ran his tongue all around the head, leaned back to spit on it, then took him deep enough to make himself gag. He came up gasping and put his hand on Shane, stroking his spit up and down his length. He looked back up to see Shane absolutely enthralled, looking down at him like he was inventing air. It made the farmer smirk hard, feeling cocky as all hell now, and put his mouth back on the tip as he stroked it. That’s right, chicken man, let me show you how it’s done in the big city…

“Gahhhh…God that’s so good…I can’t…”

The farmer moaned around the head, and continued stroking when he pulled back for some more air. Licking his lips, he dipped his head and poked at Shane’s balls with his tongue, giving in to every dirty urge he got. Shane moaned out a curse, and the farmer could hear blades of grass being ripped from the ground, predictably caught in Shane’s clenching fists. Despite the distinct sweaty smell and hair getting in his mouth, the farmer kept going, pulling his balls into his mouth and sucking, the surprised sound of pleasure from Shane making it all worth it. Pleased, the farmer started making a “mmm” sound around the balls in his mouth, the vibration overwhelming Shane and prompting him to shove the farmer back by his shoulders, then grab the back of his head when he still brought his face back to where his hand never let go of Shane’s hot cock.

The farmer situated himself over Shane’s lap again so he could lick the tip while he finished him off. He let it twirl around the head, and tried to make eye contact while he did it, but his eyes kept fluttering shut each time he swallowed. Shane was blown away, nearing his limit, and unable to tear his eyes away from the farmer’s sloppy performance. It was perfect. Had he not felt utterly helpless, he may have used the hand gripping the farmer’s head to push him down further, enough to satisfy him, but the slow build from the farmer’s unpracticed teasing had Shane teetering right on the edge, face scrunching like he was about to sneeze.

Then the farmer was coughing as wetness hit the back of his throat, shutting his eyes hard and keeping his lips sealed around the head as he kept stroking him. He swallowed rapidly and squeezed the pulsing vein under his thumb when he felt it twitch rapidly as Shane finished in his mouth. He was moaning unabashedly in time with his ragged breaths, then couldn’t help turning to higher pitched whining when he felt the farmer’s satisfied “mmmmmmmph~” sound as he slowly pulled off. He stroked some of the wetness off and wiped his hand on the grass before sitting back, rubbing the back of his neck that was beginning to get sore, and let out a dramatic

“aaaahhhhhh~ that was nice~”

When he looked back at Shane’s reaction, he was once again filled with bone-headed confidence when he saw Shane’s wrecked condition. Looking blazed out of his mind, sweat was glistening all over him, pretty mouth still open and panting. He pulled his shorts back up and sat up straighter against the wall.

“That was… fuck that was good. I don’t know if I can do all that for you…”

The farmer took his cue to stand up again, cradling the back of Shane’s head to guide it to rest against the wall as he stood over him again. Shane looked dizzy with affection from where he was, hands grasping the farmer's legs again as he rose to his knees to get face-level with his crotch. Still dying to give the farmer his very best, then they’ll be even. Yeah, that’s what it’s about…just paying a guy back…

“Don’t worry…just let me do the work, yeah?”

He had one hand working on freeing his own cock and placed the other on Shane’s face, hissing out “thaaaaaats it…” when Shane happily began sucking on the thumb the farmer had placed on his bottom lip. His eyes were shut, more of a reflex from trying to focus on his partner through the tornado in his mind, but also making it a surprise when he felt the farmers spongey tip against his face. Luckily Shane was loaded enough that his burning embarrassment easily turned pleasurable again, though he feared that he would still be remembering this quite clearly in the future.

The farmer moved to brace his hand against the wall, swiping his cock against Shane’s open mouth. The feeling of his hot wet tongue between the feeling of his coarse stubble against the farmer’s sensitive dick had him clenching his teeth and cursing. He swiped it across Shane’s face like that a bit more, making it a wet mess, reveling in the scratchy feeling.

“Okay…here…just stay like this…”

The farmer adjusted Shane’s mouth open so he could freely slide his dick in and out, rubbing against the inside of his cheek. Shane allowed it, eyes still shut, and did his best to keep his lips around him. He put his arms down, bracing them against his own legs, unknowingly performing a personal favorite for the farmer: no hands. He moaned loudly in appreciation, getting goosebumps when he heard his voice echo across his property. He threaded both hands around Shane’s head gently, and let his hips do the work, so the head was making Shane’s cheek stick out lewdly. The obedient display made the farmer wonder if Shane was unfairly drunker than he was, despite being so blazed himself that his mouth was now painfully dry. That, or the man beneath him was also genuinely getting off on letting the farmer fuck his mouth however he wanted for the very first time. The farmer put his faith in the latter and kept going, thrusting in and out at a steady pace.

“Hhhhhoh my god Shane…you’re doing so good, baby….” The farmer moaned out. “Just…stay just like that for me, yeah?”

He couldn’t tear his eyes away from where Shane’s lips were stretching wide around him. He kept making noises, little moans and groans of surprise coming from his throat as the farmer moved his cock around inside his mouth. The head was making his cheek poke out each time he went as deep as he could, and the farmer was impressed with how far Shane was taking him. His eyes were squeezing tighter with each thrust, focusing on keeping his lips tight over the ridge of his tip as it fucked his mouth. The farmer was captivated by the sight, moving a hand to cup Shane’s cheek, a rather sweet display, even if it was only to feel his dick through Shane’s skin. He opened his eyes in response, looking up, and unintentionally made a desperate noise to match his desperate eyes.

“Oh, fuck, Shane, ‘s perfect, I’m, fuck,”

Shane squeezed his eyes shut, reinvigorated and refocused now that he sees the end’s in sight. He was determined to make up for his social blunders up to this point, then him and the farmer would be even. As if the farmer was ever offended in the first place. No matter if he was up or down, he wanted Shane, and he knew Shane wanted him too, at least like this. So he’d take him like this, if that’s what he could get.

Shane took a deep breath through his nose, and started adding his tongue into the mix, running it across his shaft as it pumped in and out of his mouth. The farmer moaned out loud when he felt it, then full on shouted Shane’s name, followed by a whiny moan when he started sucking too. It echoed for several seconds, loud enough that if there was anyone on the paths leading to the farm, they would be well aware of what they were getting up to. Shane moaned in response, and used his hand to start jerking the farmer into his mouth, sucking on the tip now. He felt a little bad when he heard how breathless the farmer was getting, and wondered about the state of his poor lungs. It left his mind easily when he heard the farmer moan for him again

“Ffuuuuuuuuuuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck, Shane, I’m gonna fucking…God, ‘m gonna-“

Then the farmer was huffing hard, not pulling back, letting Shane decide for himself how to finish. He just moaned in response, bobbing his head and jerking him straight into his mouth until hot cum was dripping onto his tongue. He sucked, continuing to milk his dick with his tight fist, then he put both hands on the farmers thighs and took his cock all the way to the back of his throat, lips hitting the farmer’s pelvis, and swallowed a few times, making a disgustingly explicit gulping noise that delighted the farmer from his heart to his balls.

“Hhholy shit, Shaneyy….”

He was far too enamored with the pleasure still radiating through his body to notice, much less care, about letting out that childish nickname at such a moment. Shane heard it just barely as he pulled back, sitting back against the house again with a huff. He leaned his head back and wiped his hot lips with the back of his hand as the endearing name sank into the cracks in his heart. His lips and tongue felt a bit numb and tingly against his cool hand. He’d never used them that aggressively on someone before. The nickname struck a specific cord within him, an emotion that mixed strangely with the afterglow sinking in as he watched the farmer redress himself right in front of him. It wasn’t the first time he’d been called that name. Their voices played in his head; his parents, his sister, his god-daughter…it was only ever people that loved him who called him that. His throat and chest constricted, and he was fighting to keep himself from crying as the farmer finally sat down in front of him yet again. Their eyes stayed on each other as the farmer lazily crawled over Shane again, cradled his head in his hand, and gave him a sweet kiss. He rested his head on Shane’s shoulder then, holding him in a close hug, which he reciprocated, wrapping his arms around his back, pulling him closer, finally able to take a deep breath. They stayed like that, in peaceful quietness, listening to the birds and the leaves rustling and the animals in the distance.

“I want you, Shane. I really do.”

The whispered confession pushed Shane over the edge, and before he knew it he was letting out quiet sobs and gripping harder at the farmer’s back. He wanted to say something, he really did, but with every thought another stuttering sob wracked his body, until he decided that he couldn’t lie if he wanted to in this state, and conceded to try and be honest with himself for once, and let his tears flow freely down his face. He hadn't consciously noticed the way the farmer was gently petting him until his crying had slowed, but he felt his heartbeat through his chest: an even, soothing beat that steadied him like a metronome. And here he was, offering it freely, convincing him that he is truly wanted. Shane called on all the bravery he could summon, and decided to be truthful.

“I-I want you, too…”

His words were like music to the farmer’s ears. He could work with this. He squeezed him tighter.

“Then be with me…”

He pulled back, enough for them to face each other. Shane’s eyes ran all over his partner’s face, landing on his lips, which he stayed looking at as he nodded, and whispered back,

“Okay…”

“Okay…”

The farmer leaned back in, slowly, and kissed him again, even slower. And they stayed like that, holding each other, kissing each other, loving each other.

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;-; dis got so sappy at the end…they really DO want each other don’t they…comments and suggestions welcome

[kingdomnerds]

For @twilightown’s #kh4challenge! I figured this little piece I wrote would fit the Day 3 challenge (two characters you want to see a friendship form/get stronger). I suppose it could also fit in with Day 2 and Day 5. Anyway, enjoy!

They had come out of nowhere. Sora was used to the heartless appearing out of thin air to terrorize him. But usually, he wasn't alone. He had Donald and Goofy help him take out the monsters. But now? Things were different. He was in a different environment with different circumstances. While it wasn't extremely challenging, it sure was exhausting.

"Get out of here!" He shouted as he took down another heartless, trying to get the citizens of Quadratum to leave the area so he could handle them. He turned back around to face them. He was exhausted. He had just gotten off of work (rent wasn’t cheap) and just wanted to get back home to the apartment to eat dinner, then fall asleep.

But like always, the heartless seemed to have other plans. He dodged the claws of a neoshadow before striking it down. The rain poured from above, soaking him from head to toe. His clothes stuck to him uncomfortably and keeping his keyblade from slipping out of his hands was becoming more difficult the longer he fought.

With a fierce battle cry, he finally managed to take down the last heartless in the area. With a shaky exhale, he let his keyblade disappear in a shower of golden light. He wrapped his arms around himself. He was soaked to the bone, and it was getting darker out.

He fell to his knees as his fatigue caught up to him. Rain droplets rolled down his cheeks like tears as he simply let the rain wash over him, too tired to care at the moment. It was quiet in the park. Nobody was around. Or he had thought at least. He could hear footsteps coming up from behind him.

Sora didn't know who it was. He just hoped they would leave him alone so he could sort himself out before figuring out a way to get home. The rain suddenly stopped pouring down above him.

He froze and looked up. An umbrella. "Need some help?" A terrifyingly familiar voice spoke calmly.

Sora turned around to see Young Xehanort holding an umbrella over his head. Sora glared at the young man and summoned his keyblade, pointing the tip at the young man's throat as he stood. He hoped he couldn't see how much his hands shook or how terrified he truly felt. "How did you get here?" Sora growled.

Young Xehanort seemed a bit taken aback by Sora's hostility. But he let out a quiet sigh, still holding the umbrella over the both of them. "I am his fourteenth vessel.”

“Fourteenth vessel?”

“Yes. My job was to explore unreality.“ Sora raised an eyebrow, not daring to lower his blade. Young Xehanort sighed.

"It's true. You don't have to believe me. But just know that my intention isn't to hurt you. I may not be the exact same person you fought, but I have his memories so I understand your apprehension." Sora slowly lowered his keyblade but never let it fade.

Sora looked the young man up and down cautiously. "How long have you been in Quadratum?"

Young Xehanort smirked. "You ask a lot of questions."

"Well, I'm curious. Can't blame me." Sora replied with a hesitant shrug. He finally let his keyblade disappear in a flurry of gold. A small smile spread across the young man's face. "I don't know how much time has passed back in reality. But here, I've been in unreality for about… I'd say at least a year or two. It's hard to tell."

Sora slowly nodded. A gust of wind blew by, causing the brunette to shiver. Young Xehanort looked out at the hazy scene surrounding them. "Let's try and find some shelter from the rain. I can try and answer any questions you have."

Sora hesitantly followed Young Xehanort as they walked. A tense silence followed. Young Xehanort glanced at the teen walking beside him. He frowned, taking in his features. He looked exhausted. Dark bags had settled underneath his eyes. He was slumped forward slightly. And he seemed to be dragging his feet. He didn't have his usual walls put in place. His positive smile was just a front so nobody knew how deeply terrified he really was. It was only a matter of time before he broke. Xehanort thought to himself as he focused back forward. The silence was starting to become a bit much.

"How did you arrive here?" Xehanort asked quietly, but loud enough for Sora to hear. Sora didn't answer right away, biting his lip as he carefully thought over his words.

"I abused the power of waking to save someone very special to me. Now, I'm paying the price."

Xehanort couldn't help but smile. Sora glanced at Xehanort and frowned. "What're you smiling about?" He asked defensively. Xehanort shook his head. "Nothing. Just…thinking about how similar we truly are."

Sora paused. "What do you mean?"

Xehanort glanced at the boy before looking straight ahead, the rain still pouring down as street lights lit up the area. "We both have sensitive hearts, Sora. But, I guess the only difference between us, is that you haven't fallen to darkness because of it."

Sora stopped walking. Xehanort turned around to face him. "What do you mean by that?" Sora asked cautiously. Young Xehanort was silent as he tried to come up with the right words to say. He sighed quietly. "When I was around your age, I trained to become a keyblade master. However, something happened. A classmate of mine had a heart similar to ours. He was very sensitive to the hearts of others. To the point where after the loss of his sister, his darkness became too much for him to handle. He went insane. He murdered…all of my friends and then some. I studied darkness to try and control it. I swore I would never become like my classmate."

Xehanort laughed bitterly. "But, I ended up becoming just like him. He had even said the same thing I am telling you. How we are the same."

Sora's face fell. He stared at his shoes. "I'm sorry…." Xehanort sighed. "It's fine. Things…happen. And sometimes, we can't control it. Whether we like it or not. Life is unfair. You and I both know that. But, I'm glad you've been able to keep your light."

Sora swallowed nervously. He moved forward, urging Xehanort to follow. "We aren't so different, you and I." Young Xehanort then glanced at the brunette. "You can be honest with me, Sora." Sora raised an eyebrow in confusion. "Be honest about what?"

"That you actually want the title of Keyblade Master."

Sora's eyes widened in shock before he waved his hands in dismissal. "What?! No! I'm fine without the title. Besides, that's all it is. A title!"

"Is it though?"

Sora snapped his mouth shut. "It may be a title, but with it comes respect. I know how they treat you, Sora. How you're always the laughing stock. You're not good enough. Even though you try your hardest. It will never be enough. And you pretend to be fine with it all. You…remind me of my best friend, Eraqus."

"Aqua, Terra, and Ven's master…" Sora whispered. Xehanort nodded.

The teen glared down at his feet, wrapping his arms around himself, feeling a bit insecure. He supposed…what he said made sense. Young Xehanort offered him a smile. "You can be honest. I'm no longer an enemy. I…would actually just like to be your friend."

Sora looked up at the young man, aghast at his statement. "W-What?"

"I would like to be your friend, Sora. I would like to help you out."

Sora chewed on his lower lip. "Think about it, at least. You don't have to have an answer right away. I'm not forcing you either."

"A…Alright."

Xehanort nodded. "Good. I don't know about you, but I'm starving. Want to get something to eat?" Sora couldn't help but smile slightly. "Yeah, let's get some food."

I want Young Xehanort to come back and be friends or at least an ally to Sora. I'm sorry. I just think this would be really cool!!

If you read this whole thing, wow. Thank you! Hope you liked it!

[cctine]

Even if TEMPEST | Otome Game Review

Hii!! Cheers to my second review 🥳

‼️ BEFORE YOU READ THIS: BEWARE OF SPOILERS!! MASSIVE SPOILERS ‼️

Okay okay so this has to be one of my FAVS!!! AHHH like I wish this otome was longer 😩 I love how intense and every sec puts me in the edge of my seat. The plot was SO CAPTIVATING FOR ME and even the characters. There wasn’t a lot of romance overall but the plot makes up for it! I’m the type to like the plot over the romance and this otome definitely did it for me! I loved the heroine, she’s so strong and brave and it made the whole plot so much better with her being her. The guys were *chefs kiss*. They were finneeeee.

Basically to summarize it in my words (not the best of summarizing)… she lives in a household where she was neglected and bullied all her life by her family. She lives in this run down room but one day she gets told that she will marry this crown prince (Conrad) but ends up dying in her *first life*. She meets this kid in the afterlife (?) and he tells her to help him catch the witch of the ruin (aka the villain of the game) and gains the ability to rewind time. Through all the rewinding, she makes friendships, relationships, etc. But in every route, we see so many crazy events that happen with the other side characters. We are immersed in a dark fantasy world filled with intrigue, mystery, and romance~

There are 4 love interests:

CRIUS CASTLEROCK

TYRIL I LISTER

ZENN SORFIELD

LUCIEN NEUSCHBURN

The recommended route to play: Crius ➤ Tyril ➤ Zenn ➤ Lucien ➤ ???

The route I enjoyed from most to least: Zenn ➤ Tyril ➤ Lucien ➤ Crius

⏳ Crius

Soooo he was the first route I played and woweee he sooo fine heheh but I overall did enjoy this. I do not remember much since I did play this game a while ago but all I remembered was how protective he is. He is also popular with the ladies and her mentor teehee. But there was this scene where he asked the heroine to take care of a bird and she finds out the girl bird is pregnant. There wasn't a lot of romance but it was a great start to the whole plot itself. The ending was so sad aaaaaaa!! When you finish his route, you get thrown into Tyril's route :)

⭐️ Rating: 2/5

⏳ Tyril

OH YES I LOVEDDDD his route so much. He is the investigator (not sure what the right name is called) but the person that judges and holds the investigation. He looks mean but he is sweet and is only sweet to her. He slowly falls in love with how fast and well she works and oh mah goodness... we find out he’s some ninja and he works with Conrad (this ugly spoiled prince that kills our girl in her first life). The reason is because he is devoted to following the descent of the goddess or something (but we find out Conrad and his family are FAKES). Sorry, I do not remember a lot but the gist of it 😭 The ending was so sad for him... :( but omg at the end of the game, when he finds out that she’s the goddess, he was so shocked and his attitude changed so quickly BAHAHA he’s so polite to her at the end.

⭐️ Rating: 4/5

⏳ Zenn

HANDS DOWN MY FAV!!! And look at him. HE SO HANDSOME AND GOOD LOOKING LIKE 😻😻! I was interested in him from the start because every time our girl rewinds, he would switch his roles. Turns out he remembers EVERY time the time rewinds and at first he thought our girl was the witch or working with the witch of the ruin. But no instead he falls in loveeee with her and tells her that he is from a different world (aka Japan). He protects her when she falls victim to the witch and helps her win the witch trials hehehehhehehe I absolutely loved him. He also can’t die because he is stuck in the world and has been trying to find his way back home. I think he was a baseball player (correct me if I’m wrong since my memory is hazy). But he is mah man 🙌

⭐️ Rating: 5/5

⏳ Lucien

AWWWW the prince. He dies so many time when I was playing the other route but you reach him last due to the plot. He have always liked her because they were childhood friends. At first, we saw him as a weak and crybaby prince but as you progress the route, you notice Lucien started to change and became more of a leader and fit for the throne. He is wholesome and cute 🥹 and I just wish there were more cute scenes with them together!

⭐️ Rating: 3/5

⏳ ???

This is just the common end once you finish all the routes but 1. I HATED CONRAD >:( and 2. Maya is so cute and I love her. Maya is her maid and she been through thick and thin for Anastasia. The ending was basically the witch of the ruin loses and our girl meets the goddess and was like I am my own person, I am not like you, which is so BADASS (I love her so much) and yeah perfect ending. I lowkey want a route for the witch of the ruin because he saur fine and all he wanted was the goddess to come back. He a loyal boy but uhhh his ways were odd HAHAH. But I loved this game so much and I could not put it down!!!

⭐️ Overall Rating: 5/5 <3333

Gameplay hours: 20+ hours

Soundtrack: 5/5

Art: 5/5

[vnyverse]

hong eunchae x reader

Warning: y/n is toxic, unrequited love, my go at self-sabotage angst, please don’t bash me!

When she’s happy, it’s rainbows, unicorns and an endless display of affection, but when she’s upset, her expression tells of the world’s premeditated, despicable biases against her, and these forces seem to go all out to wipe the smile off her face. Just like when you first met. Do you remember? Parts of the memory were hazy for sure, but what you wouldn’t forget was the girl’s witty remarks, and unparalleled enthusiasm for food. With hair braided, messy bangs swept to the side, she confidently made her way into the classroom, and at the mention of her looking like a smiley potato snack, she confidently answers “so you think I’m cute?”, and a friendship blossomed from there and then.

The following years were marked by individual struggles, but more importantly companionship in these times, with Eunchae navigating through her aspirations, and making it into hybe, while you worked hard with your academics to secure a spot in a top university. Today was no different, you catch her up with lessons she miss, and help her out with assignments actively, maybe grabbing a snack or two for her when she ends dance practice at the academy, as she runs you through the events of her day, clad in the navy blue hoodie and black framed glasses, about the other girls she looks up to at the academy, a claymation movie she would like to watch (with you of course, but she doesn’t say it out because she wants you to buy the tickets), while you look at her, admiring every raise of her brows, animated motion of her hands as she illustrates the events of the day like a pissed off orchestra conductor.

November nears, the time of year you decide on what she’d like. After thorough planning, you extend your fingertips to set up the invite channel. Bittersweet feelings flow through your torso, as you check your email, your scholarship at the prestigious university outside of Korea has been cleared, it was what you dreamed of, worked for, but now you really can't bring yourself to be in a festive mood. Man, all the interviews and debates, competitions you put yourself through were no easy feat, you think to yourself as the voice inside you tells you to think happy thoughts. You tilt your head back, resting on the headboard. You take one good look around your room, sweeping through the mandals, polaroids and photos that decorate your walls, and every little memory with Eunchae seemed to play. Vacations, travels, holidays, sleepovers, excursions spent with her, even the little picture from both your embarrassingly endearing flour covered faces from a baking course a few summers ago hung on the wall. Something about it brought a tear to your eye, and you didn’t know whether it was the uncertainty of the future or the realisation maybe more appropriately, your overthinking, that a time comes when you will go on separate paths, and be okay missing one another and be okay with not doing anything about missing each other. You wipe the tear away, and you turn back to your laptop. It would be the last birthday you get to spend with her physically before she heads a much more busy lifestyle, that of pushing herself to the limits, facing her fears, and your apprehension worried you, but not as much as your admiration for her, and you think to yourself that at the end of the day at least you could still be there for her when rainy days come. The digital clock read 2:16am, but you missed her already.

The day comes, and rather than be amazed at how stunningly adorable she is in her birthday dress, surrounded by her favourite people, you unknowingly crack a smile at how beautifully she has grown, and over the course of ten years of your friendship, she had blossomed into a young woman. Now, with candles blown out, even in a room full of people, you easily identify the smile reserved for you, ever so silly, with canines exposed, and the figure charges toward you, leaving you with no choice but to carry her. This is how you would like to remember her.

“Thank you so much for planning this n/n, you have no idea how much this means to me!”

The room erupts into cheers, applause and thanks for your planning of her birthday party, but all you could think of in the moment was how the least you could do for Eunchae was give her a birthday party the way she has been wanting for months. Right, you hadn’t told her about the scholarship yet. Eunchae urgently pulls you into the corner of her kitchen by the sleeve, and gushes over another boy from the dance academy, telling you the boy apparently did contemporary dance, and made a piece with Eunchae as his muse. Niki or something, you figured his name was, and it sounded like a really good name for a puppy, you thought. Maybe now you had a reason to leave. Leave her before she leaves me, though that sounded more harsh than you wanted it to be, but you had to do something about these feelings. Leave for a little, wait for things to die down, maybe then you could remain on good terms again and like her. Liking someone was exponentially harder than loving someone, in your terms. You never found it hard to love in your younger years, but when you love someone, it’s irreversible, no more liking them, no more remembering them in a lovely way, more so of wanting to immortalise them in your memory, a connection so deep it was sure to hurt if it ended. When you like someone, they bring up good memories, fond memories, but their influence never extends toward anything too personal, and that way your walls would remain unbroken, and only cause minimal hurt if anything happened. What made you so afraid to love?

She who represents all you’ve loved in a person now walks halfway across the room to hand you the largest single slice of chocolate cake you see in the room, plated on a flimsy single-use plate, and you think she sees through you for a second, as she seemed to question your expression, and you fix a smile before she gets concerned, yeah, Eunchae always has a hunch. You give her a hug before accepting the cake in her hands, not before her finger collects some cream and smears it onto your nose, with some of it unfortunately landing on your top.

As you try your best to wipe off the chocolate cream that now stained your white cotton top, it is evident what you’re doing was at best to remove some cream, but it couldn't be helped that blotches of brown would be rubbed into the fabric with every strained scrub it suffers. It draws effort out of you, and the hand delivering harsh scrubs has knuckles white, while your expression stills. It was not going to wash out, it was going to be ruined, because indulgence is always punished. There was no running away from this, not this time.

A/n : (Leave them before they leave me, anyone?) wrote y/n to be a little toxic but she’s lowkey how I am when I overthink 😫😩❗️❗️❗️ gosh I hate overthinking but I seem to only have the urge to write at 1am now, so enjoy scraps of whatever comes to my mind at 1am, unedited, served with a side of what I scrounge through on Spotify 🥰 I’ll work harder to delivery angst that hurts in all the right spots

[foreverrandomwritings]

Okay wait I’ve gotta know about our baby girl too. Some sad and maybe happy

★ - sad headcanon, ✿ - Sex headcanon, ☮ - friendship headcanon

Oof hurting our baby girl for the sad one is gonna be rough. You made up for it with the sex and friendship though😘 I’m also wearing my Bob and Phoenix crewneck for this.

Warnings:

Talks of death at the beginning.

Super fluffy in the middle.

🚨!!!18+ at the end!!!🚨

★ Sad Headcanon

~The worst day of her life was when her grandmother died.

~She and her 2 younger brothers had been raised by their grandparents when their mother and father both passed away in a car accident.

~So losing yet another member of her family was gut wrenching.

~She had her first ever true panic attack that day.

~Luckily Bradley was there to calm her down as she had gotten the news during their time stationed together.

~When she went back home for the funeral she was on autopilot for most of it.

~She had to take the reins on planning everything as her grandfather was much to weak and heartbroken to do it.

~The middle brother was unable to help due to the fact he was in prison once again for something she didn’t care much about.

~Her youngest brother had just had a set of twins with his wife so he wasn’t able to help much either.

~Everything was hazy for her up until she got the cremains from the crematorium.

~She cried in the car with her grandmother sat in an urn next to her.

~She has a ring, necklace, bracelet set with some of the ashes in them.

~Bob asked her about them once and she bittersweetly told him about her grandmother.

~All of the amazing memories she had of her as she was growing up.

☮ Friendship Headcanon

~Growing up she didn’t have that many friends other than the ones that were on her soccer team from middle school to senior year of high school.

~They no longer talk however as when she went off for the Navy they all lost touch.

~However the Navy has brought her 2 of the bestest friends in the world.

~Bradley and Robert.

~It will be war picking who will be her best man out of the two when she gets married.

~Bradley was there for her when her grandmother died.

~That honestly meant the world to her. She will never be able to thank him enough.

~Bobby boy even though freshly her back seater has become her 2nd pea in a pod.

~They do pretty much everything together.

~Grocery shopping, running, working out, dinner, brunch, breakfast, road trips, visiting family, living, shopping, you name it they probably do it together.

~The first time Bobby boy gave her a rock she was Uber confused but put it in the center console of her car anyways.

~Now she has quite a few of them.

~Sometimes if she finds a cool rock she’ll pick it up and give it to him.

✿ Sex Headcanon

~Okayyyyyy this one is 🥵🥵

~She normally likes to be the dominant one during sex.

~She fucks dumb. You could be the smartest person alive and by the time she’s done with you you’re brain is blank.

~Likes to tie you up and do orgasm denial or orgasm overstimulation.

~Will use a Bluetooth vibrator on you while out at the Hard Deck or grocery shopping or something.

~Red, yellow, green for how you’re feeling.

~Loves to eat you out. Will be like a women starved. Completely unhinged feral.

~Will growl when you pull her hair or scratch her back.

~Gets a little peeved if you leave a hickey that’ll be on display when she’s at work.

~However she’ll leave bite marks on your thighs.

~Knows every little spot that makes you tick.

~Will finger you at any given opportunity.

~Loves to fuck you with her strap on.

~When she lets you be the more dominant one she will melt into a puddle.

~Becomes a moaning and whimpering mess.

~Loves having her nipples played with.

~Lick them, suck them, roll them, pinch them anything and she’s a complete mess.

~Her aftercare will be top notch.

~She’ll gently clean you up with a warm rag.

~Will ask you how you’re doing.

~Will make sure you use the bathroom afterwards.

~Gets you a glass of water or something to up your electrolytes if it was an especially rigorous session.

~I can’t think straight when I think of baby girl and sex. My brain is literal fuzz.

Tags(open): @wkndwlff @angelbabyange @theeleggymeggy

Headcanon Ask Game

[ourflagmeansgayrights]

I loved Good Omens, but how people see it as amazing queer representation is so frustrating. I see why people like the codinf and could see themself in the text, but the fact they treat it like the end all be all of representation and put it on the same level as explicit rep is frustrating. It's frustrating because Neil gets to have his cake and eat it, too. He got something half his audience will never realize is queer (i know this because half the people i watched it with didnt realize), but he gets the praise for being a queer icon and great representation or whatever. I'm fine if he didn't want to make it explicitly queer, especially because it's a big change that and he didn't want to change too much from the source material since his co-author passed. But he did make changes and added the queer subtext that was less present in the book. And in the show, there's this je ne sais quoi to it that is missing, something in the vibes that is just missing. Something a queer author would've been able to get. The closest I can get to describing it is like by the end, here's still a gap of unresolved feelings between the lines. Or like, touch isn't that big of a deal between them. I feel like if their were worse actors in it, or actors less on board with the queer subtext, the show would just be baiting. That's how thin the line is for me with Good Omens. Also, I hate to say it, but it was clearly not written with ace people in mind. Neil just heard ace people feeling represented and nodded along in agreement. If you seee the phrase "their love is above physical intimacy" it's not ace positivity, it's someone being sleeved out by gay sex. The angels are mentioned being sexless in the book, amd fans put more thought into the angels gender or lackthereof than the show does, except for the one non-binary actor that plays Poison and i think ine of the angels. The leads are essentially written as and meant to be seen as cis male by audience members, not nonbinary characters that pass as cis male. And I'm sorry, but Crowley in a dress was a man-in-dress joke, and Neil just nodded when people praised it. There is better ace rep out there, stories with better queer subtext, and better stories with better representation. Can people please stop praising protecting the straight man with a good show with mediocre rep from the mean queers. Why is there this narrative that we have to love all media remotely queer and see it as good rep inherently and that it will "divide the community" and "helping the enemy" if we don't?

ok so my memory of gomens is VERY hazy but i think the je ne sais quoi that you’re saying is missing is how the show essentially builds an entire story arc with crowley and and aziraphale’s relationship, with an inciting incident and a rising action and then… it skips the climax and goes straight to the resolution.

like, they build up this relationship in the show so much more than they do in the books. and because of the nature of “opposite sides of a war” thing, there’s a lot of tension that comes with that. they care about each other but their friendship is forbidden and they’re conflicted about it so they hide their feelings and they reject each other despite how they constantly hang out with each other and when one of them is in danger they go crazy. and a story arc like that needs a Big Conversation, an “all cards on the table emotional vulnerability hashing it out” kinda scene. it needs a confession, basically.

and the thing is that this confession doesn’t have to be explicitly romantic for it to work in the show. it can literally sum up to “you’re my best friend and i would do anything for you, i don’t care what the rest of the world says” and that would be a good climax for that story arc. but it needs to be a lot more dramatic than the few short scenes that we did get in the show where they actually talked about their feelings for each other.

anyway i’m with you for all the criticisms you have of this show and the fandom and also neil himself. good omens is a very good show that gets a lot of undue praise from queer fans who can’t separate their personal connection with the characters and the story from being able to actually identify groundbreaking queer representation. like you can just enjoy the show, not every story with queer rep has to be a Diversity Win

i feel like that narrative of “we have to love all queer media or else you’re dividing the community” comes primarily from fans who think gomens is groundbreaking and who take criticism of their favorite show way too personally. so like, when you say “good omens isn’t amazing queer representation” they think of that as a criticism—bc to them it is amazing queer representation—and not as just… a statement of fact. bc like, not every show needs to be incredible queer representation??? imo? so THEN they think you’re insulting the show and bc they love the show so much it feels like a personal attack on them. that part specifically is very common in general lol, people take criticisms of their favorite show VERY personally

[not-available-for-comment]

Current favorite books, by genre: Horror

Note that these are faves, not Most Pures, Least Problematics, nor Objectively Bests. Proceed accordingly.

The Hollow Places by T. Kingfisher

Horror portal fantasy/isekai featuring a recently divorced young woman who is working at her uncle’s tiny and eccentric taxidermy museum as she decides what to do with herself. Several deeply disturbing scenes and ideas that I still think about. One thing I like about T. Kingfisher’s books is that the protagonist usually has friends but rarely has a love interest. Idk if that’s unusual to the genre but I find it refreshing.

Camp Damascus by Chuck Tingle

Rose is the godly and submissive daughter to her conservative evangelical parents. She would never waver in her faith or her commitment to godly behavior. But. But her parents are weirdly invested in her dating a boy she only likes as a friend. And she starts seeing a mysterious woman in a staff shirt from the local conversion therapy camp. Even in places where no one could possibly be. She has hazy memories of happiness with a person she no longer knows. And she’s started… vomiting locusts? (Idc if I haven’t finished this one, it’s a favorite anyway.)

Beneath The Rising by Premee Mohamed

Nick Prasad’s best friend Joanna “Johnny” Chambers is brilliant and beautiful and fascinating, a child prodigy who’s saved the world several times over but still finds time in her busy schedule as beloved international genius superstar to spend time with minimum-wage-earning everyman Nick. Until Johnny’s invention of a form of clean energy seems to somehow set the world ever more askew. Then Nick and Johnny end up bound together in a quest through cosmic horror to find the tools they need to set things right. But what set things wrong to begin with? And what are Nick and Johnny? To each other, and to themselves? Honestly not particularly scary (to me at least), but the exploration of Nick and Johnny’s complicated relationship is so well done and perfectly observed that it makes me insane.

The Haunting of Hill House by Shirley Jackson

A young woman leaves a stifling home life behind to investigate a haunted house with a small team of amateur investigators. There is definitely something wrong with the house, but the other investigators offer the promise of friendship. I honestly don’t want to say more, because it’s SO subtle and well done. My absolute favorite haunted house story so far, hands down.

Carrie by Stephen King

Look, I know this one is old hat. Literally King’s first published novel iirc. But. But I was absolutely fucking furious at the patriarchy when I read this book, and watching a blood-drenched teen girl blow up a gas station with her mind because the world was cruel and unfair was EXTREMELY cathartic. You can criticize it all you want, but this is my fave.

Dracula by Bram Stoker

The man, the myth, the legend. By which I mean Jonathan Harker, of course. Look, it’s tumblr, I’ve got a Dracula Daily tag, you know the drill. Absolute best cast of characters to get routinely disrespected by adaptations for 12 decades running. And Jonathan’s diary is extremely solidly written gothic horror imho.

Sunshine by Robin McKinley

Probably the only vampire novel aside from Dracula that I really, really, really love. Rae, also known by her nickname Sunshine, has an ordinary, everyday life as a baker of famous cinnamon rolls for her stepfather’s coffee shop. Then, she’s kidnapped by vampires. Not because she’s strategically important, powerful, beautiful, or tasty. They just needed a living human to use as a pawn in some kind of internecine power struggle, and she was in the wrong place at the wrong time. But, somehow, she’s able to piece together bits of luck and will and memory to survive. She’s not the same afterwards. How could she be? How does she fit into the loving, close-knit world of the coffee shop now that this terrible, tremendous thing has happened to her? And what does she do when her brief disappearance won’t stay neatly folded away? A lot of McKinley’s books explore trauma and recovery in some way, but this one is my personal favorite, from the warm if chaotic world of the coffee shop, to the building of the larger world half destroyed by but fascinated with magic, to the cat and mouse game between Rae, the cops (the book doesn’t quite say ACAB but it does say Cops Have Their Own Agenda Which May Not Be Yours), and the vampires. It deserves to be more popular than it is.

Widdershins by Jordan L. Hawk

Look, this will either be your cup of tea or it won’t. It’s an independently published m/m romance set in a fictional town in Massachusetts that exists at a nexus of cosmic horror. It’s in first person, which I personally dislike for romance novels. But it’s darkly, wryly funny, with an intensely autistic-coded narrator who has focused his entire life on learning dead languages and working at the town’s mildly cursed museum, until a beautiful private detective begins slowly drawing him into the investigation of a trustee’s son’s murder. It’s sudsy, spooky, sexy, vaguely ridiculous, sometimes gross, and compulsively readable. It starts a (completed) series, and while I didn’t care much for the second installment, I’ve started the third and it’s promising so far. The first book also works well as a standalone if you’d rather leave it there.

Stand Still, Stay Silent by Minna Sundberg

This online comic is one of my favorites: 90 years after a plague causes much of the world to be overrun by eldritch monsters, a ragtag group of adventurers ventures into a contamination zone in search of valuable artifacts, new experiences, and possibly more. A really engaging art style, charmingly written characters, really neat monsters, a nice sense of the numinous, and some tantalizing hints about the origins of the plague. To my mild surprise, the artist has apparently become a born again Christian and terminated the series. I have the whole thing in hard copy but have been holding off finishing it because I don’t want it to be over.

———

Well I suppose I’ve put off making dinner for long enough…

[thealmightyemprex]

Disney Month:The Love Bug 1997

For the 17th installment in Disney month we shall look at the TV movie reboot/sequel to the classic Herbie franchise ,The Love Bug

In this 1997 TV movie Herbie,a living Volkswagon Beetle finds himself with Hank Cooper(Bruce Campbell ) a mechanic and former race driver with his own insecrurities and a bit of jealously over all the attention the car gets,ignoring is oddball artist friend Roddy Martel(Kevin J O Connor) telling him the car is alive ,meanwhile a former owner of Herbie,the pompus race car driver Simon Moore III (John Hannah ) makes contact with Herbies creator  Dr. Gustav Stumpfel (Harold Gould ) to make his own living car ,the feral Horace

The Herbie series,which follows the adventures of this living car ,was iconic back in the day,one of Disneys few big franchises (Which I know sounds insane now ,considering the MCU...Which this has a connection to.....I'll get to that ),though now is seen as a curiosity ,a forgotten relic of a bygone time,or just dismissed as stupid.I will confess I am not a Herbie expert ,I have only seen three films (This one,the original Love Bug ,and Herbie Fully Loaded ) but I am a Herbie defender,I actually think the premise is cute despite having a disdain for cars . I think the original Love Bug is a classic and while my memories are hazy ,I enjoyed Fully Loaded as a kid .But What are my thoughts on this film.....Honestly I really enjoyed it

Now I have seen some lukewarm thoughts on this film dismissing it as only noteworthy cause the lead is Bruce Campbell and if you know me well you might be scoffing and saying "Oh they only like it cause they like Bruce Campbell"....I cant lie and say thats NOT a factor,because it is.I am a Bruce Campbell fanatic ,I adore Evil Dead, The Adventures of Brisco County Jr ,Bubba Ho Tep ,Man With The Screaming Brain ,My Name is Bruce ,his performances in Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs ,Maniac Cop ,Black Friday ,Lois and Clark ,his cameos in Sam Raimis Spiderman franchise ,I could keep going .Point is he is one of my favorite actors,having old school movie star charisma /good looks, a character actors sensibilities and expert comedic slapstick timing on par with the old masters like Buster Keaton or Harold Lloyd .I am a fan and as a fan it is fun to see him get to be in a goofy Disney comedy as opposed to usual horror fare he is well known ,but not just in a "Tee hee aint it wacky to see Ash talk to Herbie " way,I think he is a legit good choice for the lead,cause he is charmy,got his trademark snark ,but can do the vulnerability and make you believe that he cares for this car ,cause of course he can , this guy fought his HAND in a movie ,he can definately make me belive he has a friendship with a living car .So yeah it is a factor ,but its because he is such a good actor I think he is an asset......But I dont think he is the only asset

So I kind of find it baffeling people looked at this and dismissed it because it has so many THINGS that make it stand out....Including the fact the director is Peyton Reed,who has gone on to direct THE ANT MAN trilogy ,and he kind of brings the same sensibility he brought to Ant Man to this ,which I can only describe as lovingly silly. Like the movie knows its audience will find it silly ,and while it acknowledges it ,it loves it and embraces it .It pokes fun at some cliches but it also embraces some,and because some things are played sincere,they also are really funny

The cast is great ,not just Campbell ,as the film is full of character actors .We get some fun small parts from Burton Gilliam and Jeff Garlin ,and highly enjoyable supporting performances by Clerance Williams III ,Harolg Gould ,Dana Gould , and Micky Dolenz .Alexandra Wentworth is a good love tinterest,playing with some tropes ,and John Hannah is a very entertaining weasily pompous villain .My favorite character is Roddy played by Kevin J O Connor who is this artist who is able to communicate with Herbie ,being very lovable as wel as very funny .Also Dean Jones,star of the original film reprises his role of Jim Douglas ,and even though he isnt in the film alot its fun to see him here

I adore Horace the evil car ,I like that he is an extention of Simons evil and is a feral monster ,but has a connection with Simon .I think the production team did a really good job giving menace to this car

My only complaint is it feels like Herbie himself gets sidelined ,but the film still works.

Overall,this is such a fun underrated gem and not a bad intro to Herbie,though personally I think ones should watch the original film first

@ariel-seagull-wings @goodanswerfoxmonster @the-blue-fairie @angelixgutz @princesssarisa @themousefromfantasyland @amalthea9 @filmcityworld1 @marquisedemasque

[ajoytobeheld]

Top Thirteen Films of 2011 (in no particular order)

January 7th, 2012

BRIDESMAIDS

Oh Kristen Wiig where have you been all my cinematic life?  Your representation of female friendships was bitterweet and your impersonation of a penis was accurate.

DRIVE

Any other director then Nicolas Winding Refn and any other actor then Ryan Gosling and this film could have been directed by Tony Scott and staring Nicholas Cage or Liam Neeson. What a hideous thought. That lift/elevator scene is one of the best things I have seen all year, and I saw a man fit through a tennis racquet.

If this list was in any notable order this would definetely be top.

MIDNIGHT IN PARIS

My first of two Tom Hiddleston films. Pure coincidence. I swear. I really enjoyed the sentiment of this Woody Allen film. A love letter to the literary and cultural greats he admires so feverishly and (you suspect) continually tries to emulate. And Adrian Brody makes a great Dali. It is a nice little dedication to his inspirations and I loved loved watching his interpretations of the personal lives of the great writers from the days of yore. Like Grazia for the readers digest crowd.

THE TREE OF LIFE

Terence Malick can be called many things (mostly by Sean Penn) but unambitious is certainly not one of them. This beautifully flawed film (perfection is sooo overated) manages to cover some pretty big themes (God, morality, the loss of innocence and creation of the universal to name but a few) in a relatively normal running time and introduces us to the talent and luminance that is Jessica Chastain. (Look at her being all the embodiment of Grace and that)

I thought it was at its best when the camera quietly and beautifully observed the relationship between the brothers and parents, like a wonderful hazy memory played in the minds eye of Sean Penn’s troubled architect, and at its worst when the overly earnest voiceovers kicked in. I could have done without those dinosaurs too…. Ultimately it is a far more interesting film thematically and visually then many others that came out last year, even if Sean Penn had no idea what as going on.

THE ADJUSTMENT BUREAU

Not the best plot, nor the best film but the best chemistry I have seen between too actors (Emily Blunt and Matt Damon) all year. Genuinely elevated the film for me to something particularly special.

Watch it and have fun with it you. Have most fun with the bit where they can travel through magical doors that don’t bend to the laws of physics, but only if they are wearing Trilby’s.

ANIMAL KINGDOM

An Australian film about a dysfunctional crime family that both terrifies and disturbs with acting and camera work that is never hysterical or overplayed, just considered and very well done. Jacki Weaver gives a masterclass in acting as a truly terrifying matriarch who makes Joe Pesci look like a de clawed puppy dog with no testicles. Her Oscar nom was very well deserved.

A LIFE IN THE DAY

80,0000 people submitted videos to youtube showing the mundane and interesting events that occurred to them on July 24 2010 and Ridley Scott, Kevin Macdonald and Joe Walker edited it together into a documentary. It produces a smorgasboard of emotions and you can watch it here FOR FREE (what else are you going to be doing? Making some kind of sandwich?)

WORLD’S GREATEST DAD

Weird and dark and mental and made by the guy with the squeaky voice in Police Academy. Robin Williams stars as the father of a throughly unpleasant boy who makes his sons terminal asphyxia wank look like a suicide making him an unlikely poster boy for a mis understood generation.

THE DEEP BLUE SEA

A very British affair with Rachel Weiz as a post war lady who surrenders herself to the tragedy of romantic love but with a steely determination and a stiff upper lip. It felt like a play, but a really good one.

MELANCHOLIA

The first time I saw this film I got motion sickness and had to leave the cinema, the second time I sat further back and closed my eyes for the first ten minutes. Its ending left me in a state of complete and utter despair, confusion and flux. I thank Lars Von Tier for this reaction. The opposite of apathy. The opposite of comfort. The opposite of “meh.”

KILL LIST

This British film about two hit mens “last job” made me feel sick and unnerved for a good long while. Part Coronation Street and Part Wicker man, it’s a very hard piece not to wake up sweating about in the middle of the night.

ANOTHER EARTH

A low budget sci fi film that isn’t really about sci fi but the chance we all have at redemption. Or something like that. Written by and starring Brit Marling, it uses some fairly dodgy science to explore the idea of parallel universes but in a very personal way. The last two minutes are totally killer too.

SENNA

Senna is composed solely from archive footage thus The Academy have ruled it out as a best documentary contender. FOOLS. It is a excellent film about brazilian Formula 1 racing car driver Ayrton Senna, and his triple world championship winning ways and hopefully the much more sensible BAFTA team will give it the recognition it deserves.

Other Notable Contenders

Thor (This film was a monkey barral load of fun, thanks Kenneth and thanks Tom Hiddlestone and OMG AVENGERS! AM I RIGHT?) We Need to Talk about Kevin The Skin I Live In Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Spy Hugo Super 8 Beginners Rise of the Planet of the Apes

and the less said about X Men the better.

Ellen x

[quickdeaths]

Loneliness could kill, could it? That didn't sound so bad to them. A painless way to go, if it came to that. No matter how many times Shinobu promised to be safe and avoid taking any harmful actions against herself, the belief that the world and its future would be nebulously better without her in it had bored its way into her head and refused to leave anytime soon. Wasting away like a that dolphin left behind at an abandoned marine park seemed a fitting end for her.

There was a spiral that came with these sorts of feelings. Future Foundation wanted her alive, for some reason or another, and she provided a necessary service to her classmates. Furthermore, she'd promised Sonia that she would keep the all-consuming thoughts of death at bay. The guilt at betraying those expectations threatened to drown her, only intensifying the feeling of how little she deserved to live, and the process began anew.

"I don't really believe that a fresh start is possible for someone like me," Shinobu admitted, "and at this point, I don't know who, or where, would take me in." Well, Sonia was important enough that she could likely force it through in her own country, but, what would be the use in that? It would be taking an enormous risk, and spending a large amount of political capital, just to have the 'privilege' of housing one of history's greatest killers.

They shrugged. "But then again, perhaps I don't get to hold such opinions, really. It's enough at this point that I simply go along with what I'm told at this point, and I'd rather listen to you, Nevermind-san, than most of Future Foundation." Surely their former friendship, which Sonia had assured her had ended before the Tragedy, couldn't be so important to her as to go through all of this. Still, she had a warmth and sincerity to her that eclipsed what the likes of Future Foundation could offer, and if the archer was going to be so careless with their life in the first place, what reason was there to be obstinate towards someone trying to help.

"If you were there, I imagine it could help," she mumbled, doing her best to stave off the thought of seeing Anzu, or Miss Aoyama, or the rest of them all again. "I don't expect you to have any formal training in... interpersonal conflict mediation, or something, but it could be beneficial to have someone in the room to..." She shook her head. "I don't know. It would just be easier, I think, to try and face those people, and the things I've done to them, with friendly company." The things she'd done to them, and what they'd done to her, compounding over each other again and again and again.

Her shoulders rose, then fell, in a weak shrug. "If you're amenable to it, at least. You knew our class, even if you weren't close with everyone, so maybe... maybe." There was no finalized thought to end the sentence. Maybe something. "Only if you're interested, of course. You're here helping us anyway, but I could understand why it could put you in an uncomfortable position." Some awkward third-wheel sitting to the side as two people with the most complex relationship known to man had to sort through hazy memories and complicated feelings. Surely, were Shinobu in the other position, she'd want to avoid it as much as possible.

"Beyond that, though... if you could bring me cigarettes, I'd appreciate that." Shinobu gave a weak sigh. She honestly didn't even remember when she'd started. Then again, it hardly cracked a top ten list of the worst things she'd done to herself. "I'm medically high-risk, so it's inadvisable, but, I can't deny that it's calming." Her heart was feeling tight and uncomfortable again - unpleasant, but not indicative of any further trouble, she hoped. "Oh, and, ah... If you could have me returned to my cabin for the day, that would be nice. I'm a bit tired, and I'd prefer to rest."

Sonia shrugged and gave a shake of her head. There were days when she'd fall to pieces even hearing her name. Now, it just resided in her heart in a dull ache, similar to the ache she felt when she remembered the day Shinobu declared she hated her and never wanted to see her again. "It was awhile ago, earlier during The Tragedy," She explained, her tone flat as she frowned. "I just...I wish I could have been there for her. Maybe I could have protected her. But as soon as Junko Enoshima began her violent acts against the Student Council, my security was alerted and I was evacuated from Japan in less than an hour. I was only able to warn her and a few others in my class that they needed to leave Towa City immediately for refuge elsewhere. The other two...they survived. She did not."

As she spoke, she'd idly traced her fingertip over the condensation on the soda bottle, the cold water a feeble distraction from her guilt. She'd been evacuated because she was the princess, but in doing so Sonia couldn't ignore the fact she was a terrible friend for leaving them all behind. Not just those she'd been able to warn, but her entire class: half of them had perished and there had been no time nor opportunity to mourn. Sonia wasn't even sure how, or if, the rest of them made peace with their friends' passing. Mikan didn't talk about it much and the former members of Class 78 simply hadn't known her classmates that well. And it wasn't as if 77-A remembered anyone.

They were supposed to hold onto their happy memories, and yet it felt so isolating. Though from the way she talked about it, it seemed like Shinobu didn't even have happiness in her isolation. That didn't surprise her: her friend had always embraced a sense of melancholy, but even towards Anzu...that was the part that gave her pause. "I think it has been proven somewhere that loneliness can kill, Yaguchi-san," Sonia told her, taking the last bite of her scone. Better to finish it now or she wouldn't have an appetite for dinner. "And while, again, most of us will never truly understand what you have endured, you have fought to stay alive through it all. In a simulated version of this island and the reality you were awakened into. Don't take that chance, or your strength, for granted: you may be an incredible archer and keep the kitchen stocked with fish, but there is a strength of soul as well. And you have it, if you can trust it."

When only crumbs were left on her plate, Sonia pushed hers away too. Not only was it delicious, she didn't want to offend Ayaka with two half-eaten plates of snacks. "Well, I believe in you at least, even if Japan's leaders do not," She replied matter-of-factly, the tone she used when she would not be entertaining counterpoints. "And you know, Yaguchi-san, you could find a new home outside of Japan if an agreement cannot be reached for you to live there. Somewhere with more of a fresh start, to a degree."

She couldn't bring herself to say directly that was exactly what would await Shinobu after her trial. Whether the country allowed her to stay or not, it was Sonia's responsibility to her on her ship, and then her plane, back to Novoselic and to Masaru, who had taken up residence in Boudry House and hadn't wished to leave until they'd returned. It was deceptive, yes, but she didn't think Shinobu would simply go with her if she asked.

After all, Shinobu didn't remember hating her, but Sonia couldn't forget. The least she could do was try to help where she could and ignore her own memories for a little while.

"Oh? I would be happy to help if I am able," She agreed with a smile. "What are you in need of my assistance for?"

[darklydeliciousdesires]

All Teeth and Claws - An EZ Reyes/Reader one shot story.

EZ smut is here, my beauties! 

Words - 1,789

Warnings - Smut. Minors stay away!

Gingerly opening one eye, you awake slowly, the throbbing in your head to be expected. You weren’t wasted the night before, but you definitely weren’t sober. You fumble blindly at the side of your bed for your ever-present bottle of water, locating and opening it, gulping back the contents in order to quench your parched mouth. Better.  

The covers are soft and warm against your nudity, but fuck, they’re potent. They smell of alcohol tinged sweat and the scent of sex mingling with the occasional burst of your perfume and the fabric softener, as well as the pleasant fragrance of the man lying beside you, his large body still under the spell of sleep. Finally, you had sex with EZ. It had been on the cards for a damn long time.  

In a friendship with that much playful flirting, it was always obvious it’d be a matter of when and not if.

Remembering it, though? Now, there is where a problem presents itself.

The flashes begin to come back to you the further you awake, remembering it in stages. You remember how it felt to kiss him with blindingly raw desire, how it was to be pressed into the wall by the spread of his chest, the sheer size of him encompassing you, the way his hands made short work of your clothes, how it felt to feel him, the power running through him as you delighted in touring his muscles with your palms, and how easily he picked you up and threw you onto your bed.  

He undressed to his jeans and joined you, big hands clutching your knees, parting your thighs as he slotted himself between your legs, kissing you again. What happened next was hazy, but you remember how it was when he touched you intimately for the first time, because of your thought that two of his fingers sliding into the warm hug of your pussy felt better than some dicks you’d had in the past.  

When he began to trawl you with them, he only confirmed such. When he lowered his mouth to your sex and swathed your clit in the suck of his lips, you couldn’t even think any longer. Coherent thought, gone. Bye, bye. He ate you like a man half starved, your clit swelling against the unrelenting beat of his tongue as he drove it hard against your bud, grumbling deeply about how wet you were before continuing.

It was the only time he paused, your heat bathed in long, flat licks as he looked up at you, dark eyes slowly closing as he began to suck again, your nails grazing his scalp. Again, it’s all hazy, him flattening you to the mattress, his mouth on yours, removing his remaining clothes, your hand on his cock, his rumbled laugh at your exclamation over how big he was, more kisses, tangling sheets and then...

“Oh, fuck!”

Being split around the thick of his cock was utter sexual sublimity, EZ’s mouth at your nipples as one of his huge hands encircled your wrists, pinning your arms above your head, bearing his weight down through his pelvis, arrowing your soaking cunt with determined thrusts.  

Again, it becomes hazy, your brain not joining the dots in how things changed to him behind you, then you on top of him as he fucked up into you savagely, his thumb at your clit, the lewd sounds of your sex filling the room as you cried out, your insides glimmering.

The pleasure he invoked boiled you right down to your very marrow, the deep punch of his cock making your insides fizz until it all culminated and your release surged through you, leaving you a spent mess atop him. EZ was far from done with you, though.  

Your memories fail you again, only the very briefest of flashes returning to you over the remainder of the night shared between you. When the man you created them with turns over and smiles, though, you’re no longer concerned by remembering them.  

“Hey.”

“Morning.”

“How’s your head?”

“Thumping.”

“Ditto. And I’m thirsty.” Reaching for your bottle, you haul it up and drop it down between your bodies, EZ winking in thanks as he sits up, taking a few big glugs and revealing the state of his back. He’s clawed from his neck to way past his waist. “What are you snickering about back there?”

“Your back,” you giggle, EZ turning to frown. Still, he looks entertained all the same.

“You’ve made me look like a goddamned road map, haven’t you?”

“Pretty much. You should take it as a compliment, though.”

“I do. Feel like adding a few more?”  

The way he looks at you, oh, it could tempt you all on its own, his dark eyes full of sexual hunger. Even if you didn’t partially remember that he’s incredible in bed, you’d be enticed by that look, that look that has you moving to climb astride his huge form, gasping softly when his lips meet your neck, hands gliding down your back.  

“I apologise for all of these, by the way,” he tells you, fingertips trailing over your neck.  

“All of what? I’m yet to face a mirror. Oh god, do I look like shit?”

He laughs softly through his nose, shaking his head. “No, you look great. As for what, I kinda did a little of my own marking. You’ve got hickeys and teeth marks all over.” His tongue glides the column of your throat, your hand reaching between you to grasp his rapidly hardening cock, EZ’s response of adding another little nip to your flesh reminding you of a moment last night, of him yanking your head to the side by your hair and biting you hard as he utterly railed you into the bed.  

God, he was a beast.

Did you expect anything less, from a huge, motorcycle riding outlaw?  

That morning, though, what you share to begin with is soft and languid, a lazy exploration of each other, awakening your desires. Shifting up a little, you guide the head of his cock towards your clit, using him for stimulation, getting yourself off too while squeezing him to full stiffness, his groan rich with arousal, kissing you hungrily as his hands trail through your messy hair.  

Squeezing his shaft as you continue to rub yourself, precum oozes over your folds, EZ’s teeth at your jaw as he grunts with lust, his erection thickening more within your hand. You’re slick with want for him before long, positioning him against your opening and sinking down, sighing in bliss to be opened by so many inches once more, split wide around his girth, the huge wad of cock that fucked many orgasms into you the night before.  

This time, you want to remember them all in vivid detail, not just little jolts of electric through a boozy haze.  

Little jolts are exactly what you feel as you take him deep, your lips parting on a little cry as he nudges your very summit, EZ watching you, his eyes alight, smiling at how much you enjoy his cock. He begins to move beneath you, hands gliding all over your curves, pushing you back until you’re lying flat, making his hardness press tightly against your sensitive, nerve ending rich front wall, your muscles contracting appreciatively around him.

Sparks begin to burn, a wave of heat rushing through you, his mouth gliding up your body with delicious, open-mouthed kisses. His hands bracket your waist, unfolding his legs from beneath you, seemingly unsatisfied with you being the one to set the pace.  

“You can’t expect to ride a bull forever, honey. Sooner or later, he’s gon’ throw you off.”

His words from last night come back to you as you’re held down by powerful arms, EZ slamming into the hot clutch of your cunt with force. He’s all power and exertion, until he slows, dragging his cock through your soaking walls in beautifully slow all-in, all-out thrusts, groaning as he leans down to kiss you, hand gently holding your neck.

You’re a whimpering mess beneath him, his mouth claiming yours again as he slips from you, pausing, driving back in, grinning as you wail. “Fuck, you take my cock so damn well.” His praise is sealed with another kiss, quickening once more, hips snapping wildly as he fucks you with devastating finesse. If you’d known he was this good, you’d have bedded him years ago.  

He’s utterly magnificent in how he gives to you those many thick, steely hard inches, his big cock dragging tingles through you, your body humming with pleasure. His lips caress your throat, his hands reaching beneath you and sliding down your back as you arch into him, kneading his huge biceps, feeling tiny against him as you wrap your legs around his waist.

Closing your eyes, you lose yourself to the moment completely, gasping and crying out as he fills and empties you at a steady rate, your neck and clavicles the focal point of his mouth. What he gives you is pure, unbridled ecstasy, your whole groin alight with glimmers that keep surging strongly, more so when his fingers meet your clit, rubbing at you expertly.  

“Fuck, you’re getting so wet. I’m soaked in you.” He groans, his cock and dark pubes sparkling with your dew. He increases both pace and voracity, moving his weight off you as he sits up and pushes your legs back until your knees touch your shoulders.

It makes for deeper, tighter penetration, his huge cock feeling even bigger as it glides in and out of your burning wetness with ease. The pace becomes unfettered, your hands gripping his veiny forearms as he starts to really pound your insides, rearranging your guts as you both moan indulgently.  

Everything is wild, fervid, uncontained and magmatic, both of you spiralling headlong into the kind of release that has your moans and groans filling the air along with the sound of your skin smacking together, an undoing of all-consuming magnitude charging through you, your nails once again clawing his back, his fuck rendering you an absolute wreck beneath him as he bites onto your neck in sexual retaliation.

Afterwards, you’re both still and breathless, little quakes wracking you as the nirvana ebbs away slowly, the high releasing you from its grasp. 

“Well, that’s one way to cure a hangover,” he pants, resting his head between your breasts while his hands softly squeeze.  

“But are you really cured, though?”  

He takes a few moments to think on that. “Kinda. I might have to fuck you again, just to be sure.”  

He at least lets you get up and eat breakfast first before taking you to bed for round three.  

A/N - Did you like it? I’d appreciate you SO MUCH if you could comment and reblog if you did! <3