#my love hate relationship with u is so strong /j

[poppurini]

RINNADH SI SWEEWVE TO KGOFS I WISLL BRJEL INTOT YOYNR HIUSE AT THHRHE EIN HEB EMORNINT TANDB STAND BEISJE YOUR NBED ANDBD STSOROE AT GOU WHILE GIGIVHG GYOU NGIFHRMARES I IWKWLL BE YOULR SLEEP PRAALUSIS DMEIIBY HATS IS WOTNGN WIRHT YOU

THIS IS WHAT I MEAN BY MILLIE DISCRIMINATION ALL I WANTED WAS TO GREET ONE OF MY DEAREST FRIEND ON TUMBLR AND I GET HIT WITH THIS ?????????????????? JUST SAY YOU WANT ME TO DEACTIVATE

bites u

BITES YOU BACKK💕💕💕

also lilimi warning!!!

[minheelovelee]

i’m having fuma brain rot and i’m going crazy for this man rn so do you think you could do a nsfw a-z if you haven’t already? I love your work btw <3

fuma nsfw a-z

thanks for requesting anon!! im glad you like my writing :))) this took a long time hehehe

warnings: nsfw.

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

oh he is the sweetest. cleaning you up with a baby wipe and making sure you're clean before you drift off to sleep in his arms. he'll take a bath with you if you have the energy. and he always makes sure to give so so much praise and so so much love. if u have tears or feel sad, don't worry! superhero fuma is here!

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

bro likes thighs. a lot. he's so sweet buying cute shorts and thigh highs for your growing collections! if you could be a doll and squeeze your thighs together just a little tighter, he would love that :)

he's worked hard to earn his dream body. he doesn't necessarily have a favorite part of himself. but when he has the strength to fuck you while standing, he can't help but give himself a pat on the back.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

on your back after backshots. he's got a polaroid of that scene in his wallet. he also likes cumming inside. he hates laundry. you're a lot easier to clean than the bedsheets.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

he's really come around to the idea of touching you while you're asleep. there's something so enticing about his little girl being so full of peace while he does dirty things with your bodies.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

he fucks. no reason to beat around the bush. he has experience, and if he didn't i would be so surprised. he seems to be wise beyond his years, so i don't think this is his first time around the block.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

anything from the back is a strong contender. he loves hitting it from behind. he's a bit mischievous, so he likes when you face away from him. you can never guess what he'll do next.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

he fills any role gracefully. he can be silly and lax if that's what supports his partner the most. he can also be the opposite.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

he doesn't care to shave. things are pretty natural down there. he knows what an everything shower is and he HATES them.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

he's actually very romantic and can show a lot of love during sex with his partner. but, he can pull back and be okay with a "no strings attached" relationship. he's in tune with his emotions and understands his partners well.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

he doesn't jack off that often. he has horrible post nut clarity. he would take a cold shower before he decided to get off.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

his strength kink goes crazy. he's worked hard for his muscular build and loves to show it off. sex against the wall is his favorite thing. he also loves when he uses his arms to make his partner ride his cock. :)

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

the bedroom or bathroom. specifically the shower. he likes shower/bath sex for the intimacy aspect of it. otherwise he will keep things in the bedroom.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

short clothes.

begging

lingerie

offering blowjobs :)

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

won't push his partner's limits. he has rules for you to follow in and out of the bedroom. he can read his partner like a book, so he knows when things have gone too far.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

he love love loves sloppy head. if you're not crying by the time your done, you didn't try hard enough. he leans more on the receiving side.

but hes really good at giving head, too. he's very attentive to his partner. 69 while STANDING. woah. i just got dizzy.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

he's rougher than most. he likes to take things slowly when there's time. slow, deep, rough. all the buzz words.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

he's not crazy about them. he would rather leave you hanging until he has time to devour you. :) he likes to take his time. he also has performance anxiety when he is on a time constraint :P

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

I think he's willing to experiment. that's how he found out about his strength kink and love for manhandling. he always wants to try something new, and makes sure you're comfortable before moving on.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

he can have too much stamina at times. sometimes he just has so much pent up energy, he'll go for hours. but he knows when to stop. he keeps the multi-hour sessions to a minimum.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

he owns a fleshlight. i don't think it sees the light of day often. he owns a couple vibrators that he lovesss to use on you. watching you squirm and beg is one of his favorite things.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

he can be a bit of a tease. he loves watching his partner enjoy themselves. but he also loves seeing their expression when he says something naughty in their ear. he's the type to get you riled up with his hands and words, leaving you needy all day.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

he's pretty quiet in bed. he moans when he finishes and when you deepthroat him. otherwise he sticks to small grunts and dirty talking quietly.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

he's a head pusher. a nice head pusher! he's also a throat fucker. he's become obsessed with laying you on your back and fucking your mouth so he can see the bulge in your throat. :)

"atta girl. taking my cock in your mouth so well. there's a little more for you, love. can you open up wide for me?" head pusher...

"breathe through your nose. good girl. look at you working so hard to make daddy feel good. keep going, sweet girl."

"fuck, you are perfect. i bet you're soaked right now, sweetheart. come sit on daddy's face so i can see."

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

his body is tea. he works so so hard and has the craziest pecs.

his dick is average length. but he's quite thick. you'll feel a stretch every time.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

his sex drive isn't as high as you might think. he's more laid back. he can make out with his partner and have it not lead to sex. he's a strong soldier.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

he's awake for a while after sex. he's gotta look out for you and make sure he didn't fuck you up too badly. if you struggle to walk afterward, he'll carry you. even if he's a little tired. :) he waits for you to sleep before he shuts his eyes.

[sagstelliums]

(Top to bottom) who’s your spirit guide/guides?

Pile 1

Angel numbers 4567/456 could be important, I see that your spirit guide really loves you a lot. They’re there for you a lot or they try to contact u the most when you’re going through a tough time and u need courage to get through it, they give you the strength and try to contact you along the way to soothe u and let you know that you aren’t alone and that you’ll be okay. Theyve been with you since early child hood, they may pop up in your dreams or try to contact you in ur dreams. They hear you manifest and praying so they try their best to get you what you want, they hate when you procrastinate. Signs- libra, Scorpio, Leo. Initials- B, G, J, U, N

Pile 2

I see angel number 1010/633 could be important, I see that you have two spirit guides one feminine and one masculine but I see that the feminine is more blunt or forward and the masculine is more shy and sensitive, they were with you from the very beginning and they will be there till the very end. They watch you closely as you work towards your goals, they push you to go forward and they give you a lot of tough love because they know sometimes you need a kick in the ass. They love you a lot but they sometimes have to give you hard lessons, the feminine is very fiesty and they come off as queen of wands and swords. Their approach is aggressive and they fight hard to defend you, they know how hard your life is and they hate seeing you go through tough situations. They just want you to be happy especially if you had a rough childhood or you have a lot of issues at home/with ur family, they are like a mother figure to you. The masculine helps detect things lurking in the shadows or things that you can’t see, they take care of the threats before anyone tries to send it ur way. The masculine and feminine are both very fiery and confident when it comes to their job in protecting you, they’re meant to help you get everything that you want in life while also working hard and being there for u when it gets rough. Signs- Scorpio, Leo, Aquarius. Initials- V, L, Y, Q, E

Pile 3

Your spirit guides are very very powerful, I see you have multiple strong guides that are may be angels or just very high ranking spirits. I see that they vary in age, some of you are protected by old spirits and there’s one young spirit that protects you too. They have very angelic light energy, I definitely see you’re protected by God himself. You’re spirit guides protect you a lot in ur love life and friendship wise too, I see that you may have a really small circle or you’re very independent but that’s on purpose. Your spirit team want to teach you patience and moderation, they know you have a long journey ahead of you so they protect you from tough obstacles or enemies that try to hide themselves and I see that a lot of blessings in disguise happen for you. They want you to have stable and divine relationships so it may take a while to come, they’re teaching you to be strong/wise and to protect yourself with strong boundaries. I see that they contact you alot or even intuitively so pay attention to ur dreams, synchronicities, and angel numbers. Signs- libra, Aquarius, Gemini, Pisces, Capricorn. Initials- D, T, Y, V, E

Pile 4

I see that your see ur spirit guide is masculine and they used to be human, they help you a lot financially or when you find money randomly it’s because of them. They teach you how to be patient and how to be more logical/calm, they teach you how to look at things from different perspectives and how to not be selfish. They protect you from heartbreak or they help you find the strength to move on during really tough times, they help you think or plan/prepare better. They help you accept change and understand the cycle of life, they also help you let go of tough situations or people. Signs- Gemini/Scorpio, initials- O, C, X

Personal readings always available , please watch my 18+ pick a card reading on YouTube

[dnana-2809-blog]

heyy do u mind if return an ask that u sent me?

"what are your top 10 favorite characters (can be male or female) from all of the media that you loved (can be anime/manga, books, movies or tv series)? And why do you love them?"

how are you, btw? :)

Not, at all... I'm fine, thanks.

My favorite characters mostly change from time to time. But my top 3 have been the same in the last 4 years. Here they are :

1. Ash Lynx (Banana Fish)

He is an amazing character. Have been through a lot but still have kindness in his heart. He deserves all the happiness in the world. His relationship with his "good friend" Eiji is just something else. That is why, after the series ended, I search for the fics. This series is the reason I made ao3 account, to search for their happiness.

2. Yona (Yona of the Dawn)

She is strong, beautiful and a great leader. Watching her journey from a spoiled princess to an amazing future queen is a so great. Also one of the few m/f canon relationship that I love is between Yona and her bodyguard, Hak....

3. Wei Wuxian (Mo Dao Zu Shi)

The one who started it all and got me to BL is him. I was surprised when I know he got together (canon) with the ml. And then I read the other works by the same author, they are all amazing works. And I became a BL fan until now. Wei Wuxian is smart, kind, cheerful, mischievous, and people can't help but like him when getting to know him...

4. Nakajima Atsushi (Bungou Stray Dogs)

I love him so much. He always try his best and try to see the good in everyone. Can't believe when I saw someone's hate in him. Like, how can you hate someone who already hate himself so much? Glad to see his developement as the story progress. Also, I'm surprise to find new otps (non canon mlm) when I start this series.

5. William J. Moriarty (Moriarty the Patriot)

As a fan of Holmes, of course I start watching/reading this series. And I can say that this is one of the best adaptation of Sherlock Holmes. The story and characters are all great. As I read, I'm surprise that my favorite is not Sherlock himself but William. He is just so kindhearted but willing to kill that part of himself for the greater good. Also, the relationship between William and Sherlock is special (that letter and bridge scene are a few of my favorite moments ever). Yes, I found new otps again from the series.

6. Merlin (BBC Merlin)

As new fan of this series (about 2 years), I'm glad I found it. Really love him, how he is kind hearted but can do cruel things if it's for his loved ones. His loyalty and bravery are just so him...And the ending, I did not see that coming. Well, it's me, of course there is a great bromance moments between Merlin and his prince/king, Arthur. Their relationship is so bittersweet (and why I search for their happiness in fics)

7. Patrick Jane (The Mentalist)

I've first watch the series in midde school. And he is the main reason for it. He is smart, unpredictable, mischievous, but deep down a kind hearted person. (Okay, now that I wrote it down, Jane is so similar to Wei Wuxian). Glad he can find his happiness in the end.

8. Elizabeth Bennet (Pride and Prejudice)

Love her. Never got bored reading her story. My favorite from all Austen works. Now, I'm not really into m/f romance stories anymore, but this book will always have special place in my heart.

9. Maomao (The Apothecary Diaries)

The reason I got into the series is because of her. Love her personality, how dedicated she is to her hobby, and how she always use logic more than personal feelings. Now, I know I'm a minority here but I dislike JinMao ship. Like, I wish she can stay single and just focus on what she loves to do (I know it's romance and she will end up with Jinshi), but it's just my opinion.

10. Hinata Shouyou (Haikyuu)

How can I not love him. He is really just like his name (a sun). Because of his bright personality, he can made friends with anyone and also learn from them. There are times if it were most people, they'll give up. But not him, he always got back up again when falling. And it's great. Overall this series is inspiring and we can learn a lot from this. (Also, yes, I have at least 5 otps from this series, including Hinata with his rival/friend)....

Sorry for this long answer, hope you don't mind.

[webslingingslasher]

FINALLY U LISTENED!!

can i know your ranking for eternal sunshine, j 🥹

sorry it’s just the only thing i listen to after she released it and it’s so good i listen the album from start to finish every time

yeee!!!! i forgot i wrote out my reactions as i was listening so first listen reactions under the cut!!! but my faves gotta be eternal sunshine, we can't be friends, don't wanna break up again and true story.

1 strong opener 

2 hallmark movie dance number lowk a little weak 3/5

3 i fuck w this - DON’T!!! WANNA!!! BREAK UP!!! AGAIN!!! NO- I DON’T!!! DON’T!!!! DON’T!!! 5/5 FRAT!PETER AND TROUBLE CORE!!!!

4 love science. yes queen. 

5 what the fuck. 11/5 BAR AFTER BAR the chorus 🤤🤤 HER PITCh??  THE PRODUCTION??? yeah- yes. TITLE TRACK FUCKING ATEEEEE every line SCRATCHES my brain 

6 the delivery??? it’d taking over me!!!! it’s like supernatural!!!! SEATED. 4/5 

7 OOP. THAT OPENING?? i am listening!!!!! miss ariana!!! this song is soooo cunty IF IT MAKES YOU FEEL BETTER -  i’ll be the one you love to hate, can’t relate, too much on my plate. SEE IT IN YOUR EYES,  yOU GOT TOO MUCH TIME IMM IMMEE!!! 5/5 gimme LOVE LOVE !!

8 THAT OPENING BEAT!!!! that. BOY. Is MINE. the chorus ohhhh she didn’t come to PLAYYY. 5/5 THAT BOY IS DE-VINE- VINE- VINEEEE

9 peak retail speaker song. 2.5/5 not a bad song but compared to the rest of the album I have no idea why she chose this as a lead single. it’s giving side to side to me. ((why do you care whose dick I ride line ate ngl.)) 

10 oh girl. OH GIRL. this is THE breakup song. she fucking ate this so so hard. idk this is actually such a good song. whether it’s a friendship or a relationship, it tells you that even if it was mostly bad, you want to keep those memories because the good was so good. idk this song is actually so special and relatable for all. WE. CAN’T. BE. FRIENDS. BUT. I’D LIKE. TO. JUST. PRETEND. 10.5/5 

11 :/ this is a continuation to we can’t be friends. I wish I hated you to make this easier, but I don’t. this is another really really good grieving song. 5/5

12 the chorus UGH yes. using each other as an escape… yeah this one is really good too. I feel like track 10-13 are all connected to each other.  5/5

13 she just wants the domestic, ordinary things :( lowk giving “nothing is ever good enough” vibes. i think it’s a very fitting closer. 4/5

I think this album is really good, one of her best. It tells a story all the way through and you can feel her emotions throughout the album as she process the end of her relationship. 

[thegoldencontracts]

So. You know promise rings? Not exactly an engagement ring but a little more serious than boyfriend-girlfriend... merfolk wear promise shells. Shells that represent the person they're with... Azul's partner (It's Ri--💥) wearing a small spiral shell that's wide at the opening with bumps along it, its coloration a deep purple and black. You could almost confuse it for a tentacle from afar.

How many biographies and autobiographies do you think he'll have? Self-help books?

Annnd what do you think Azul's future mega corporation would be called? Because I've seen some iterations use the 'Mostro' name and I used 'Ashengrotto' because... come on. It's his name! People need to recognize him!

The more I think about it, the more I need to see Azul meet his future self. Would he love the guy or treat him like... Cece? Hehe.

OH MY GOD PROMISE RING JUST GIVES ME THE CUTEST IDEAAA (in my opinion at least)

Azul with ri- I mean, his totally anonymous partner... He gives them a promise she'll and he tries to act as nonchalant as he can but he's also so embarrassed about ITTTT and he's trying to be smug and everything but then rid- I MEAN his partner is like "wow, this truly is quite important to you I'm pleased to see you so greatly value our relationship" not even in a teasing way just genuinely trying to be good faith and appreciate Azul's efforts yk...

But of course Azul gets embarrassed T_T I-It isn't like that, he's just... Yeah he has no defense for himself and he gets so pouty and huffy "Not now, I'm losing" (This line is paraphrased from a tootally random fic that you toooootally didn't write and I toooooooooootally didn't reread 5 gorillion times lmao)

A bunch, Azul is all about that grind 💪💪💪 he will power through the writers block

Anndd if Azul has a restaurant chain I feel like he'd actually keep Mostro because despite him acting aloof and business-minded he actually truly cares for the Lounge (one of the funniest parts of twst imo is that fact that Azul in canon is basically... A FUCKING TSUNDERE OVER HIS LOVE FOR IT'S CRAFT IT'S THE FUNNIEST THIGN EVER Jade says it's clear he cares about the lounge, Azul says "Hah! Do you honestly believe me to be capable of an illogical sentiment such as 'attachment'?" And Floyd and Jade are like... Yeahh... Sure we totally believe you Mann he's literally a tsundere for his restaurant HOWEW-)

Anyways sorry the temptation to yap was there and I couldn't resist but back to what u were saying so I feel like he'd be attached to the name too and no matter how he tried he can't bring himself to change ittt

CECAELIA FAIRBANKS MENTION SPOTTED I WILL NOW RAMBLE Cecaelia is Azul's worstie she breaths within 1000000000 miles of him and he's immediately like "SHUT THE FUCK UP NO ONE ASKED YAP YAP YAP RIZZLESS BETA WHITE KNIGHT L + RATIO + I HAVE MORE CONTRACTS THAN U" nothing can compare to his hate /j

But actually though I feel like it depends on whether or not Azul knows this is his future self bc with cecaelia that's the conflict it's literally a better version of Azul bc... Azul from the future but Azul doesn't realize thatttt

But the version you're bringing up? Even better version of Azul. More successful and more skilled. If Azul doesn't know... Poor dude's gonna be put through the emotional wringer (and develop a strong hatred for what is quite literally himself) His hatred will be stronger than what he harbors for cecaelia lmaooo-

If he does tho I feel like he might have mild jealousy that's overshadowed by "HOLY SHIT THIS IS WHST I'LL BE IN A FEW YEARS" kind of thing...

Anyways that concludes my ramble thank you

[astrumocs]

actually pain and suffering be on u all of them for oda/LH /J.. (just pick maybe 3~4 you're interested in :3c)

🌞- Have you ever gone out or gotten caught out of your hive during daylight? What happened?

"I almost left Jules hive in the middle of the day once, but he's a light sleeper, and he heard me open the front door. He really went off on me for that attempt I won't lie to you."

💀- Are you strong enough to face shadow droppers on your own if faced with them?

"Strong enough? Like just on physical strength alone? Probably not. If I have my revolver, I think I could take 'em."

🛌- Do you sleep in a recuperacoon or do you rest in other accommodations?

"Nope, mostly just sleep in the 'ol fleet-issued shoebox beds these days."

🤳- Do you use trollian? If so, what is your handle? If not, do you use any messaging system?

"Oh sure, it's usually how I talk to Lad outside of Discorpse. Sometimes I talk to Zach and Kou on there too. I'm pretty liberal with who I give my handle, so I don't mind sharing; I can be contacted at morbidOutreach."

🌌- Have you ever wanted to travel intergalactically? What would you look for in a place to visit off planet?

"Well, I am in the fleet. I do think I'd love to visit a place with a whole bunch of unique plants, though, maybe take one with me if I could get permission from the locals."

🍳- What sort of cuisine do you normally eat? Are you openly okay with items labeled only as grubsauce or grubloaf?

"Standard fleet food on an average day, although even when I'm on Alternia I still eat gas station junk food now and then, so it's not really much better."

"Except when I go out with a friend of mine, it'd be pretty rude to bring a bag of chips to a bar or restaurant after all"

----- Rest Below the Cut -----

🚌- How do you normally get around/travel? Would they ever be able to afford their own scuttlebuggy?

"I like to walk, but when I need to go a longer distance I'm a big fan of taking the bus. I probably could get a car if I wanted one, but I don't think I'm all that interested. Thing would fall into disrepair or get stolen while I was out in space anyhow."

♥️- Do you think that pity should still be considered the normal feeling for a red or would you say love is a more common practice to look for in a mate?

"I think being in a relationship because someone feels bad for you is an uncomfortable situation to be in, it needs to be about feelings that go deeper than that. There should be love there."

♠️- Do you think pitches should only be based on hate, or do you believe they should also be based on a strong rivalry as well?

"I personally don't put hate into my relationships, I never hated my ex when we were together. Maybe it's just me, but I don't think pitch is about hate."

🪦- Do you believe everyone should be given a proper burial or is it a waste of time to have gravediggers?

"Of course, I think death should be as sacred as life. You can't-- or you shouldn't-- have one without the other. If someone wants to be treated a certain way after they've passed, I don't think it's wrong to honor that."

🪖- How do you feel about the ever-looming threat of being put into the fleet if called upon by the empress to do so?

"Bad news, I'm already there. Pour one out for me, would you?"

🔥- Have you ever done something (outside of murder) that most likely should be considered a criminal act, but either wasn’t or was just swept under the rug due to your status?

"The best way I can put this is that I've only ever done what I thought was right. Afraid I'll have to leave it at that."

[darlingpwease]

My sleeping schedule and I have a strong love-hate relationship, so it fluctuates even if I do listen to you 😒 ...I think you might have eaten something wrong.. is ur head okay Dove?? U didn't hit it recently,,, right??? /ht /hj

It felt like my brain froze and was loading for a while,, my soul left my body omfg <//333

Listen, sometimes I genuinely don't know how to react to some of ur messages so I have to put them on puase and come back to them, my dumbass just forgot this time which is so HUMILIATING AAAAAAA I EVEN FORGOT TO MAKE IT SMALL TOO,, it feels like its mocking me right now 😭😭

-panna cotta

so you mean that even sleeping schedule thinks you're a teasing brat and refuses to come to you? wow... even a wanderer can't compare to you /t /j of course. you never listen to me and then suffer from it by sending unfinished messages. I'm even used to it.

i- shush! sjsgjshd... what if it is? so what? do you have something against people with head wounds? are you discriminating? are you a bigotry? are you harassing? are you a headwoundphobic? I didn't expect, I didn't expect this from you. such cruelty. you know, your thinking is too conservative & unhealthy :/// /t /j /hehehe

hehehe, you're funny,,,, it's even adorable<333 after all, you're such a cuddly cutie, even if you're mean, moody, teasing, with a frozen brain... /ht

I can't stop laughing AJAHSHHSHSSA please stop making me lauuuuuuugh</33333 I say such simple and understandable things, I don't understand why they cause you difficulties, babyboo</3333

'EVEN FORGOT TO MAKE IT SMALL TOO' small like that? /t /j I really couldn't figure out how to answer at first, until I realized that this was a working title text</333

[syzzish]

TOMAN BOYFRIENDS !

various headcannons for the tokyo rev boys as boyfriends

ৎ୭ multiple toman boys x gn! reader

ৎ୭ warning(s): suggestive (?), mostly fluff, (crack) headcannons, mentions of drugs (sanzu), not proofread; beware of errors — slight passive aggressiveness towards sanzu

ৎ୭ a/n: gives me an excuse to write about my favs so enjoy <3 also the line between past and present timeline kinda blurred so the hcs are all over the place mb 🌚

ৎ୭ now playing: WUSYANAME — tyler, the creator • nba youngboy • ty dolla sign

SPOILERS AHEAD ! PROCEED WITH CAUTION

ৎ୭ MANJIRO SANO

extremely childish omg

i feel like mikey is the type to whine n complain but never tell you what’s wrong

like he could be super moody out of nowhere but when you try n ask what’s wrong with him he’ll flat out ignore you smh

it’s okay tho bc he’s genuinely a good boyfriend

when he’s not busy running the toman he’s pretty fun to be around

his favorite pass time with you is driving around and blasting music out the windows

mikey loves when you play with his hair, especially after a long day of work — it just calms him down n reminds him that his impulse doesn’t have to get the best of him !

you’re able to see right thru his tough exterior too

just tell the boy “you don’t have to be so strong all the time, ‘jiro.” and he’ll melt in your hands like putty <3

ৎ୭ KEN RYUGUJI

big softie !!!

draken is super good at helping you navigate your problems

considering all his practice helping steer mikey in the right direction, it’s only natural that he helps his dearly beloved partner

he hates pda with a burning passion

“i’ll love you and shit in private, why do i have to show the whole world that you’re mine? they already know that.”

favorite part of your body is your hands. he l o v e s feeling your hand in his, warm and secure, it’s comforting <3

cooks for u

bomb ass meals at that

just a lot of love and care with kenchin

ৎ୭ TAKEMICHI HANAGAKI

sweet n respectful

for the first few months of your relationship you kept having to snap him out his thoughts

they were about you lmao

he adores you sm

always — and i mean always — has a hand on you

whether it’s on your waist, intertwined with yours, on your thigh, around your neck n shoulders

he does this because it makes him feel like he’s on top of the world

like that one time after he beat up the dudes for draken n he was feelin himself so he dressed all weird so mikey was like “sit yo ass down mf 🤨” yk?

idk if that made any sense but basically what i meant is he’s overly confident when he’s with you

he swears up and down he’s happiest when he’s with you <3

ৎ୭ CHIFUYU MATSUNO

10/10 boyfriend ong

takes u on dates to pet stores and see the animals hdhdjf

loyal as hell ; you never have to worry about trusting him

fuyu is a very touchy person

i feel like he likes playing with your fingers just as a fidget

like you could be talking to him or something n he’ll just take your hands into his and start playing with your fingers

he’s listening to your pretty voice ofc but he also wants to touch you like 95 percent of the time

first time he saw your smile he saw stars

you were just chillin with your friends and he saw you laugh and this man had to stop everything he was doing, pull baji aside and stare him in the eyes like

“dude i just saw the prettiest smile i’ve ever seen”

baji looked at him like he was crazy LMAOAO

peke j loves you

a good portion of fuyu’s camera roll is just you and peke j hanging out <3

love this man frfr

ৎ୭ KEISUKE BAJI

this relationship is so fun

definitely asked you to do sum crazy shit like skydiving as a date idea

bragged in fuyu’s face when he arranged a date with you LMAO

has most def pulled a prank or two on you — could not resist the temptation

loves cuddling

baji insists on laying on your chest

“it’s for a good cause, babe”

baji loves when you braid his hair

feeling your fingers running thru his black locs, pulling as gently as possible to try not and braid too tight, how could he not love it?

smiling all the time omg

could literally be doing something normal like getting dressed for the day and you’ll walk in n he’ll turn to u and flash a smile and say good morning

he just loves you sm

healthy, honest, and positive relationship <3

ৎ୭ SEISHU INUI

he is a man of few words i’ll tell you that

the day of your confession this man said “oh me too”

deadass you stood there for a good minute contemplating wtf just happened

i mean a good minute just thinking about how you poured your heart out, telling inupi that you loved everything about him, and he says that??

you almost walked away hshdjf

buys heels with you idc

tells you when you’re putting yourself in a bad situation

i feel like he’s blunt about it too hasjfjd

“baby they’re not good influences and if you hang out with them you’re becoming a bad influence by default.” 

he means well, just often doesn’t know how to reciprocate his feelings into words all the time without being too honest

he likes giving you forehead kisses

this man deserves everything ong

ৎ୭ TAKASHI MITSUYA

insanely patient

i’ve been dying to share this headcannon: he makes your clothes and styles your outfits when you two go out

matching color coordinated outfits.

will 100% dress you in designer

he’s so sweet <3

cried first time you met luna and mana :((

growing up, he had to take care of his sisters so seeing you get along with them so well it was a lot to take in !!

gives great advice

taka-chan definitely hugs you with his arms resting on your shoulders or with his hands resting on your hips, squeezing them ever so slightly

matching tattoos n piercings — yup.

has asked you to model things for him — he doesn’t care what your confidence level is like bc around him, takashi expects that shit to be at 10.

“you’re perfect to me angel, why don’t you see that?”

happy noises for takashi

ৎ୭ KAZUTORA HANEMIYA

this relationship took a while

kazutora didn’t grow up in an ideal home & has suffered a lot emotionally

so when you told him you were in love with him and all his flaws, he pushed you away

didn’t believe that you of all people had feelings for him

eventually tho, kazu gave you a chance once he got better

not the best boyfriend, but he’s trying to be better for you

he likes to keep things tidy around the house

pretty n neat

i feel like he has a few plants that he waters everyday

just little succulents that he keeps on a windowsill and waters them everyday to feel like he’s done something good

took a lil bit for him to open up properly, but kazutora is fairly good at expressing his emotions and reacting to yours

work in progress, but progress nonetheless <3

ৎ୭ HAJIME KOKONOI

this dude knew you liked him before you even knew yourself

he liked studying your mannerisms n such

convinced himself you liked him

you did, in fact, have growing feelings for koko

so the day you went up to him and were about to confess your feelings —

he stopped you and was like

“i like you too now go out with me.”

you always have to be careful what you say around him

never ever tell him you want anything because you sure as hell will have it by the end of the week

give him two days tops if you said “oh that bracelet is beautiful” and boom you have it

he just likes spoiling you :((

ৎ୭ SHUJI HANMA

crazy mf

had to take a moment and realize what you’ve gotten yourself into LMAOAOA

i feel like hanma asked you out

“you seem like you’d be down to have some fun, go out with me will ya?”

this guy has no self control

if he wants to go on a date you’re going on one, no questions asked

and they’re not just any dates so don’t expect some cute amusement park and a kiss on the ferris wheel

you often have to ground him

his actions leave no room for self care, so you gotta care for him

one word for this relationship: reckless

ৎ୭ SOUYA “angry” KAWATA

probably the most caring man on this list

contrary to his nickname and constant scowl, souya is sooooooo sweet omg

always checking on you to make sure you’re okay

i think he sends texts throughout the day

“hey baby, just checking on you. i love you and have a good day for me, kay?”

listens to whatever you have to say

i feel like you could be yelling in this mf’s face n he’ll just sit there doe-eyed

slight pda for the soul

just some hand holding and kisses if he’s feeling adventurous

his brother approves <3

ৎ୭ NAHOYA “smiley” KAWATA

his smile is contagious

constantly making jokes to make you smile

nahoya was hesitant to bring someone else in his life

his strongest relationship was with his brother

so bringing someone who could potentially be as important into his life, ofc he was scared

ended up being one of the best decisions in his life

extremely into pda

wants to broadcast to the whole world that you’re his and he’s yours <3

never wants to see u cry, it might break the poor guy :((

depsite the canon character trivia of nahoya being ranked 2nd as worst boyfriend he is a very nice partner, and if u get along with souya he swears he’s gonna marry you

ৎ୭ HAKKAI SHIBA

lovely man

he knows that he is loved when he’s with you

i feel like hakkai’s love language is gift giving

just small trinkets and such that remind him of you

he’s a model in the present so u know this man is pretty

fun and kind to be around

likes when you touch his head

he could be laying on top of you and you’d run your hands on his buzz cut and he’d be in heaven

despite his older brother stealing the thunder most of the time, he feels very seen around you

all is well with hakkai in the heart <3

ৎ୭ HARUCHIYO SANZU

yeah uhm

6/10 boyfriend

he’s busy most of the time n probably a dry texter

but in person he’s decent at giving you attention

gets high with you LMAOAOOA

haru is aware he kinda sucks when it comes to being affectionate

but whatever hahdjfj

babes why did you start dating him in the first place…

he liked the first time you kissed the scars on his lips

doesn’t like it much now 💀

ehh he’s doing his best ig

my boys :(( anyways this was fun to write !! stay safe and drink water babes <3

[thepremedthatwrites]

The ABC’s of Peter Pevensie (Smut Edition)

Hi I jus wanted to say that I LOVE your writing and I was hoping if you could write a Peter Pevensie alphabet kinda kinky, smut edition or fluff is alright too I guess, pls consider it!

I’ve never done an alphabet post before so I am winging it as I go.  I did look up similar posts on Tumblr just to get an idea of what to do and I saw that they all followed a pretty similar format that I’ve adopted for this post.  I did make some alterations just to fit what I wanted to write.  I hope you all enjoy it!

warning: entire post contains smut and mentions of smut

A - aftercare

Peter loves to whisper sweet nothings into your ear right after both of you have finished.  Once you two have calmed down enough, he’ll draw both of you a bath and carry you to the tub before helping you wash up.

B -  body part

Whenever you want to drive Peter crazy, you know to wear your hair up to leave your neck exposed.  He just can’t control himself and will litter your neck with kisses and lovebites.  

Peter doesn’t spend much time fretting over his appearance but he would be lying if he denied that he chooses to wear shirts that are a bit tight on him to show off his biceps.  He likes how it shows everyone he is no longer the scared 13-year-old who wanted to protect his loved ones but didn’t know how to.  Now, he’s strong and won’t let anyone or anything hurt the people he loves.

C - cum

Peter loves to watch you cum, pure bliss taking over your face as you cling to him for dear life.  He especially loves it when you cum on his cock so he can feel your pussy collapse around him, squeezing and enticing him to cum as well.  

D - dirty secret

Although he would never admit it, he secretly hopes that people walking by his bedroom can hear you guys while you do it, especially when you’re moaning his name.  He wants everyone to remember that he’s the one who is making you feel as good as you do.

E - experience

Peter hadn’t been with anyone else before meeting you.  He had always been too worried about taking care of both his siblings and an entire nation.  So when you two started seeing each other, he had almost no experience but that didn’t hinder him as he seemed to be a natural.  He knew the right places to touch and the perfect pace that would leave you a moaning mess.  This was because he was an expert at reading people, something that he had learned for diplomatic meetings and fights on the battlefield but was also handy in the bedroom.

F - favorite position

He’s a bit old fashioned and prefers to do it missionary.  He loves to see the pleasure build on your face as you get closer to your climax as well as the feeling of you raking your nails down his back.

G - good girl

When I tell you this man loves to praise you, I mean it.  In the bedroom, he loves to remind you what a good girl you are.  He’s constantly encouraging you and telling you how good you’re making him feel.  Even outside the bedroom, he likes to praise you.  Partially because he wants to remind you how proud he is, but also partly because he loves the look you give him when he does so.

H - hand-holding

Peter loves to hold your hands while he pins them in place above your head.  He also likes to play with your hands afterwards, sometimes doing it absentmindedly while you two are cuddling in bed.  

I - intimacy

Being romantic is in Peter’s nature so it isn’t much of a surprise that he is super romantic in bed.  Before going any further, he always makes sure it’s alright with you and he never pushes you to do anything you aren’t comfortable with.  To him, sex is much more than feeling good.  It’s another way that he can worship you and he makes sure you know it.  He kisses every inch of you, reminding you how beautiful you are.  He holds you in his arms, making sure you understand just how loved you are.

J - jealousy

Although he hates to admit it, any time he sees you conversing with someone else who may show just the smallest hint of romantic interest, he gets insanely jealous.  This jealousy usually leads to long nights in his bed chambers.

K - kinks

While Peter may not have any prominent kinks, he does enjoy having you call him ‘my king’.  He also likes to be the dominant one in the bedroom but is always happy to have you take over once in a while.  

L - location

Peter likes to do it in the comfort of his bed where you two can go for as many rounds as you can without the risk of being caught or walked in on.  His second favorite place to do it is in his study.  The sight of you sprawled on the desk, open and ready for him, is enough to make him rock hard.

M - masturbation

Peter doesn’t masturbate that much since he has you, but when you aren’t available and his pants start to get a bit tight, he’ll go for a quick round in his bedroom, imagining you were there with him.

N - no

Peter would never do a threesome as he would get too jealous seeing another person touching you.

O - oral

Peter most certainly prefers giving it to you rather than receiving it.  While you are able to make him feel wonderful everytime you give him head, you are his goddess and he wants to be the one to worship you, including with his tongue.  He especially loves it when you start to get closer to your release and grind against his face.

P - pace

Peter loves to give it rough with the occasional slap of the ass and binding your hands.  He loves hearing the bed creak underneath you two and the sound of your desperate moans as he fucks you into the mattress.  He tries to go slow at first but he’s quick to lose control with you right underneath him.

Q -  quickes

Peter doesn’t mind having a quickie, especially if jealousy is coursing through his blood.  Usually when he does quickies, it’s when you two aren’t in his bedroom and are instead somewhere more public like his office or the library.

R - risk

Peter loves risks.  He thinks the added adrenaline makes it all the more hot.  He’s willing to do it in a public place where anyone can see.  He loves experimenting as well, whether it’s trying a new position or experimenting with foreplay.  Anything that might heighten the experience for you two is worth trying.

S - stamina

Due to his rigorous training for battles, Peter has insane stamina.  He could go all night if you let him although you two usually stop after two or three rounds.  Peter always makes an effort to not finish until you do, as you are always his top priority and he wants you to enjoy the experience entirely and fully.  This can be hard though when you are also doing your best to make him finish first but he usually has the willpower to hold out until you cum.

T - tease

Peter loves to tease you, whether that be saying an offhand comment that makes you heart race or kissing you everywhere except where his touch is needed most.  

On the other hand, he hates being teased.  You had decided to tease him once, tight clothes, sexual comments, and all.  This only led to him pinning you against the wall within an hour and him making you climax more times than you thought possible within the span of half an hour as punishment.

U - undergarments

Peter has a habit of ripping off your undergarments while in the heat of the moment.  This had led to your maids having a stash of undergarments ready at a moment’s notice.

V - volume

Peter isn’t the loudest in bed but he does let out the occasional moan or grunt.  The sounds he usually makes are praises, reminding you just how good you’re doing.

W - when

Peter likes to wait a while in a relationship before taking it to the next level.  It wasn’t until a few months into the relationship that you guys did it for the first time.  But after that, you two could barely keep your hands off of eachother.

X - x-ray

Peter is average when it comes to his length, but you don’t mind due to his girth.  Every time you guys do it, he fills you up perfectly.

Y - yearning

Peter would fuck you 24/7 if he could.  You never would have imagined the high king would have such a high sex drive, but you aren’t complaining.  It’s hard to hold back when the sex is just so damn good.

Z - zzz

Peter makes an effort to not fall asleep until he knows that you are.  He likes to brush the hair out of your face and plant gentle kisses on your forehead as you sleep soundly in his arms.  There had only been a few times where he was too tired afterwards and had passed out before you did.

[i-write-boop-spoops]

N Harmonia Fluff Alphabet

One anon asked for an N fluff alphabet and another asked for just any N content, so I hope this sates you both!

Not proof read so rip me

Enjoy!

A = Activities (what do they like to do with their s/o? how do they spend their free time?)

Rather expectantly, N loves looking after Pokemon with you! Whether you’re playing with, feeding or tending to them, he really enjoys seeing you being so sweet and kind to cute little mons and giant scary monsters alike.

He also loves just snuggling up with you and playing with each other’s’ hair. He really cherishes that kind of gentle, intimate affection.

Other than that, he really enjoys doing mundane things with you, stuff like going grocery shopping, cleaning the house, gardening etc, even before you live together. There’s something very comforting about it.

Oh, and he loves dancing with you!

B = Beauty (what do they admire about their s/o? what do they think is beautiful about them?)

He admires your kindness obviously, but also your determination and resilience! He thinks you’re so strong, and in turn, it emboldens him too!

As for physical beauty? He loves your smile, even just a little quirk of your lips makes him so happy. It’s just so precious!

C = Comfort (how do they help their s/o when they feel down? what makes them feel better?)

N isn’t the best at this kind of stuff, but he definitely tries his best to offer you support. Usually he just sits with you and lets you vent, or cry into his shoulder, often bringing a cute pokemon with him to cheer you up. He also likes bringing you on walks, hoping it might clear your head.

His words of affirmation, though few, are quite powerful, so you know he means them.

When he’s sad, he’d like to be treated in a similar fashion, just quiet support and cute Pokemon

D = Dreams (how do they picture their future with their s/o and in general?)

N doesn’t really know how he wants his life to go, the only thing he’s certain of is that he wants to continue improving the relationships between humans and Pokemon, and that he wants to be with you for the rest of time.

E = Equal (are they the dominant one in the relationship or are they rather passive?)

Due to his lack of experience, he’s definitely more on the passive side, preferring to let you take the lead when it comes to dates and stuff. Though he has no problem asserting himself (gently) if he wants to do something else instead.

F = Fight (how quick are they to forgive their s/o? what are they like in an argument? who says sorry first?)

N hates fighting with you, absolutely despises it, so he tends to avoid it when he can. Inevitably, like in all relationships, you end up in a few spats. He’s never mean to you, but he does try talk over you and has a habit of just walking out instead of working out the issue right away. Really he just goes for a walk to calm him down, and he’s usually back in an hour or two, but you probably don’t solve your disagreement until the next day.

He finds it quite easy to admit fault and apologise, so you don’t have to weasel a ‘sorry’ out of him. And due to his earnest nature, you know he means it.

G = Gifts (what kind of things do they gift to their s/o? are they spontaneous or do they stick to special events like anniversaries?)

When N gives a gift, most of the time, he doesn’t even realise it. He just sees something he thinks you’d like and just gives it to you without a second thought. Usually it’s pretty flora or candy, occasionally it’s a plush. Sometimes you get gifts very often, sometimes it’s weeks, maybe months, between each present.

H = Heart Eyes (what are they like in love? is it obvious to others? how do they express their love? do they brag about their s/o to others?)

N can be described as blissfully confused when in love. So soft and blushy and not totally sure what he’s feeling, but he sure does love it, and you. His Pokemon friends pick up on it immediately and root for the two of you.

Unintentionally brags. He just thinks you’re swell and tends to bring that up often, but he’s not trying to gloat.

I = Impression (what first attracted them to their s/o? how accurate was their first impression to how their s/o actually is?)

You seemed to handle that little joltik so carefully as you returned it to its mother galvantula, without an ounce of fear or malice in your eyes, and truly only kindness in your heart. It made him feel so at ease, like he had found a kindred spirit.

Not only was he right, he also found his soulmate too,

J = Jealousy (do they get jealous easily? how do they deal with it?)

N doesn’t quite understand jealousy. Like, you love each other, what does he have to worry about? He likes your friends a lot, and he finds anybody who tries to flirt with you more annoying than anything else

K = Kiss (are they a good kisser? what was their first kiss like? where do they kiss the most?)

At the beginning, N’s kisses are sweet but awkward, he’s so new to it, so he’s a bit afraid he might make a mistake. As your relationships progresses though, he becomes more comfortable and confident with it, and kisses reflect that, so soft and caring and full of meaning

I did a whole thing about N and kissing here

L = Little Things (what are the little things they love about their s/o? are they attentive?)

Really what doesn’t he love? It’s not that he puts you on a pedestal, he just genuinely finds you amazing and he loves you so much

M = Marriage (do they want to get married? how do they propose? what would the wedding be like?)

N doesn’t feel the need to marry you, as long as you’re in love, that’s what matters to him, a piece of paper doesn’t make it any more valid than it is in his eyes.

That being said, if you want to get married, he’s down for it, but don’t expect anything sappy or traditional. No proposal, no huge event, just the two of you exchanging heartfelt vows at the courthouse, with matching rings.

N = Nicknames (what do they call their s/o? what do they get called?)

He doesn’t really use nicknames, just the occasionally “Love” or “Dear”

On the flipside, he loves your nicknames for him. Some of his favourites are “Cutie”, “Sweetie”, “Greenie” and “Nat”

O = Open (do they have secrets they hide from their s/o? is it easy for them to share?)

While I wouldn’t say N is an open book, he doesn’t really hide things from you. He tells you how he feels without much fanfare, and you’re made aware of his past quite early on, even before you started dating.

P = Pancakes (are they a good cook? how often do they cook for their s/o? breakfast in bed or fancy dinner dates?)

N’s actually pretty good at cooking, and tends to cook pretty often, especially when you’re on the road together. His meals are simple and comforting, sometimes spicy, lots of soups and curries and rice.

Since he’s vegetarian, he prefers to cook for the two of you instead of going out, since most restaurants don’t have great options for him. That being said, if you find a place with a good menu, he’s totally down to take you there.

Q = Quirk (a random quality/ability that is beneficial to their relationship.)

N does not understand the concept of BS, so you don’t have to worry about playing weird mind games to find out what he really wants. As a result, your relationship is quite chill

R = Romance (how romantic are they? are they cliché or creative?)

Again, he’s not traditionally romantic, but he does care about you quite a lot and loves making you smile. And while it doesn’t say “I love you” very often, he means it, and that is a lot more valuable than any serenade or flower bouquet

S = Sleep (who falls asleep first? do they need their s/o close to them? do they have any bad habits?)

If you play with his hair, he’s out like a light. While he’s cuddles are lax and loose when he’s awake, he hugs you like a teddy when he’s fast asleep.

His sleep routine is shit though.

T = Thrill (do they need to spice up their relationship with new things or do they stick to a routine? how often do they do new things?)

N loves the cosiness of domestic mundanity, so it’s safe to say he likes to play it, well, safe. It gives him a sense of comfort and stability that he really appreciates.

U = Unity (did their s/o change them somehow, or the other way around? what traits do they share?)

Through being with you, N learns to be more attentive and emotional (in a healthy way), and to appreciate humans even more. He also feels more human too.

While you already loved Pokemon, he makes you see how truly amazing and special they are, and treat them even better than you did before.

V = Value (how important is their relationship to them? what is it worth compared to other things in their life?)

Your relationship is very important to him, but deep down, you know his love for Pokemon trumps his love for you. Though it never causes an issue with you

W = Wild Card (a random fluff headcanon.)

Likes to make matching flower crowns for the two of you and whatever Pokemon you’’re with at the time!

X = XOXO (do they like to kiss and cuddle? are they upfront about their relationship or rather shy when in public?)

N loves fluttery kisses and really tender hugs and cuddles, ones when you’re loosely tanged together and gently stroking each other’s skin.

He is not a PDA person at all, besides holding your hand and the occasional kiss. Some of it is shyness, but it’s mostly because he doesn’t feel the need to prove your relationship to anyone. He doesn’t use affection lightly.

Y = Yearning (how do they cope when they spend time away from their s/o? do they miss their s/o?)

He’s pretty okay on his own, since he’s quite used to it, but he does still miss you a lot. He finds comfort in things that remind you of him, a certain scent, a flower, a sound, even a Pokemon, it makes him feel like you’re with him

Z = Zoo (do they have pets? do they want some in the future?)

N doesn’t have any pets, mainly because he thinks Pokemon are friends. How many Poke-friends does he have? Too many for even him to count. My man radiates serious Disney Princess energy with the way Pokemon seem to flock to him.

That being said, he’s not against good people having Pokemon as pets, so if you have pokemon, you know he’ll be the best dad to them ever.

[hansolmates]

a hero’s journey (m)

summary; jungkook and jisoo are the mightiest power couple. however, one drunken confession and that whole facade fades in an instant. you realize that maybe you need to break from your unvaried life for a bit and be the hero of your own love story pairing; jungkook x editor!reader (f) genre/warnings; best friend’s boyfriend au, slice of life, angst with a happy ending because im weak, pining pINING, everyone’s kind of a mess in their own sweet special way, alcohol use, mentions of ze weed, toxic relationships, mean friends, sex—slight dom!kook, food play, fingering, squirting, heavy use of the petname “pretty girl” bc im weak, strength kink, manhandling (oop!) w.c; 22.2k a/n; woof! my first fic for @goldenclosetnetwork​ 23 | jungkook’s birthday project! this goes out to all the closet romantics *ahem me cough* who doesn’t love pining between a cutie koo? a huge thank u for vivi @eerieedits​ for making this bbbBEAUTIFUL fic banner!  

prompt used: “I should’ve known.”

if you like this fic pls consider giving a like n’share🥺💜🥺💜

It’s so easy to ignore the world. 

Maybe it’s a young-adult thing, but it gets difficult fitting into the 9-to-5 and playing to satisfy bosses that don’t entirely understand your work ethic. Maybe it’s out of complacency, or fear. But you prefer to let the world flow around you and when you’re needed, you’ll act. You’ve reached that point in your life where you enjoy the little things, satisfied by an extra hour of overtime tacked onto your paycheck, a new fabric softener, or finding the perfectly squishy yoga mat. 

You’ve finally started feeling comfortable in your shoes, uncaring as to whether you’re single or drowning in college debt, happy to live a relatively stable life. You’re grateful. There’s nothing more than you need than your happiness, and the love of your friends and family. 

Namely, your best friend from college. Jisoo always joked about how you two “won the lottery” as dorm rooms in freshman year were determined by lottery. Pulling numbers 883 and 884, you and Jisoo snagged a corner spot of the dormitory, leaving you two utterly cramped but utterly close as the years went by. Six years later and it’s still the case, the two of you have grown into talented working ladies. While you may not be able to spend time with each other the same way you did in school, you still care for each other. 

So when Jisoo shows up teary with a rumpled dress shirt and her hair waterfalling out of this morning’s bun, you break out the good alcohol and season three of Jane the Virgin for her. 

After the liquid is warm in your cheeks and you’ve fawned enough over Micheal and Rafael’s love triangle, you let Jisoo ramble. 

Jisoo has downed a whole bottle of soju on her own, while you’ve decided to have a tasteful glass of wine. You’d rather be tired wine drunk than wasted on soju. 

“Jungkook and I had a fight,” she warbles, stuffing a handful of popcorn in her mouth, “it was totally stupid.” 

Your eyes flash, picturing Jisoo and Jungkook in quarrel. They’re the epitome of an Instagram-worthy couple, beautiful and deathly charming to a fault. They show nothing but kindness and sweetness to you whenever you third-wheel, not a lick of anger between them when you’re all together.

So a fight is something surprising. Jisoo and Jungkook, J-squared are a power couple. Saying their names next to each other just emits a sort of energy you can only akin to famous small screen couples like Troy and Gabriella or Cory and Topanga. Jisoo’s Instagram is belly full with sweet selfies of them together, the doe-eyed man always looking completely sweet and gentle to the woman in his arms.

You never piqued Jungkook as the type of guy who would pick a “stupid fight.” And you know Jungkook pretty well. 

Maybe a little too well. 

“He surprised me during my lunch break and he caught me talking to Doyoung and he thought I was flirting,” Jisoo is practically eating her sweater, her head falling between her flannel pyjama sleeves. 

“Doyoung, as in your ex Doyoung?” you raise a brow. 

She groans, glaring at you in earnest. “Not you, too! I told him it was ridiculous to get jealous, and then I told him how jealous I get when he’s around girls and I don’t need to tell him that,” she rolls her eyes, twisting her feet petulantly in her fuzzy socks, “but then you know what he says back?” 

You wince, swirling your wine glass, “That you’re crazy?” 

“That I’m crazy, exactly! How did you—” her bloodshot eyes zero in on you, where you’ve tucked yourself in the corner of the couch. You swirl the ruby liquid in your cup, watching the feet web around the cheap crystal, “you think I’m crazy too, don’t you?” 

You swallow your sigh, taking your time to finish your liquid in languid sips. Uneasy, you wish you could just sink through the couch in order to avoid this conversation. Jisoo’s heart is generally in the right direction, but in terms of emotions she has the kind of sensitivity that you prefer to ignore rather than tread. Jungkook is also equally emotional, but in a different way. He wears his heart on his sleeve, preferring to keep things straight as opposed to bottling it up like Jisoo. 

However the theoretic bottle has reached it’s brim and Jisoo’s tipping, fast. 

“I need to tell you something,” Jisoo is swerving, crawling like an infant on wobbly limbs to reach your corner of the couch. You almost stop her, tell her you can continue this conversation in the morning, it’s what you normally do when she drinks into a stupor. But tears are swimming in her glassy caramel eyes and she’s grappling onto your blanket, resting her head in her lap. 

Her glossy russet strands curtain her head, so you don’t see the expression on her face when she says her next words: 

“Jungkook told me he liked you senior year, and I told him you weren’t interested so I’d have a chance.” 

Wow. So that explains everything.

The memories that you’ve tried so hard to brush away, the feelings you’ve tried so hard and continue to try to suppress, are laid out in front of you on a rusted platter. You could laugh, you could fling the rest of the Pinot Grigio down your throat like fresh water on a hot day and call it a night. 

But instead you choke back your tears, and push her off because you’re hurt.  

Deep down you know you would’ve been less upset if she told you the week after Jisoo and Jungkook called it official. If you knew from the beginning, it would’ve been easier on your heart. But it's been over two years since the past, thinking you’ve been needlessly, stupidly, delusional in thinking that you could’ve possibly had a chance with Jungkook.

Because it could’ve been you. And the reason why Jisoo and Jungkook fought today? Now you know it’s because deep down, they know they’re each other’s second choice. 

You can’t even recall a time where Jungkook and Jisoo were together alone before they suddenly started dating, remembering how it used to be you and Jungkook before Jisoo found him one day in your shared apartment, utterly smitten. And now you know you weren’t delusional, because the feelings and the signals you two were exchanging in senior year was real. 

But it doesn’t stop the fact that over two years have passed. Two years of a serious relationship between Jisoo and Jungkook, and two years of you secretly loving him from an arm’s length. 

“You hate me,” Jisoo removes herself from you, voice trembling. The quick, dark part of your mind wants you to snap back of course I hate you. You’ve trusted Jisoo with your life all these years, she was the reason you got through college so gracefully, why you enjoyed the past seven years of your life. 

But the sentiment is stained, and all you can do is deliver a tired smile and stand up. “I don’t hate you,” you say, “I’m just, really overwhelmed. I can’t lie and say that I’m not hurt,” your fingers clutch the fake crystal in your grasp, and for once you’re thankful you’re not strong enough to break it, “but you two love each other now and there’s no point in dwelling in the ‘what-ifs’.” 

Now that you think about it, when was the last time Jisoo treated you like a best friend? You stare at your wine glass, thinking that the only time comfort is provided in this apartment is when Jisoo is upset, never when you’re upset. 

Jisoo bobs her head senselessly, agreeing to every word. It’s pathetic, seeing her on her knees and her eyes glimmering with the hope that you’d forgive her straightaway. She must feel awful. That’s good.  

You sigh, needing to be the bigger person. “You need to call Jungkook and tell him he has nothing to worry about though, after all, you two have history now. As much, if not more than Doyoung.” 

“Right,” she replies, biting her lip. It suddenly feels like you're talking to a wall, carrying a conversation that's long ended.

“As for us,” you have half a mind to slam your glass on the counter, but instead you give it a heavy hand, letting slowly thump to the coffee table, “I don’t think I want to see you two, for a while.” 

“Understandable.” 

“And I don’t want to help you move out anymore,” I just want you gone.  

“Right,” she whispers. The both of you will be completed with your lease in two months, and Jisoo and Jungkook have decided to move into Jungkook’s apartment. As for you, you haven’t decided as to whether you want to go through the whole process of moving out or looking for a new roommate. 

“I’m sorry, I’m so so fucking sorry. I just was insecure as fuck in college and Jungkook was the first person I met in a long time that helped me feel more… like me.”

You want to say that she's right, she’s selfish. Her excuses aren’t palpable anymore. It’s too late. But if you were in Jisoo’s shoes, you’d think this apology is mere crumbs in comparison to your friendship. Why isn't she trying harder? Maybe because she doesn't know any better. After all, you never told her what you felt for him has morphed into love. 

You don’t even have to ask as to whether she’ll tell Jungkook this or not, you now know honesty is not her style. 

Jisoo doesn’t get a goodnight and a drunken kiss on the forehead like she usually does whenever you two have your late night talks. Instead, she seals herself to her own demise as you slam the door to your bedroom, effectively shutting each other out. 

Work is a bitch the following morning. You’re like molasses, rolling out of bed despite the whole world and its mother telling you to go back to sleep. 

Your feet are killing you as you make your walk to work, deciding to wear a pair of red-backed heels so you can stomp your way through your day. 

Your Wusband (Work-Husband) Kim Namjoon matches you step-for-step, eyes glued to his phone as he catches you on the sidewalk. “Woman on a mission,” he comments absentmindedly, eyes glued to his phone as he follows the click of your shoes to your favorite cafe. 

You spare a glance to your right hand-man, eyeing him appreciatively at his dedication to your morning routine. He’s your favorite co-worker, one who keeps you on time to your meetings and keeps you sane when you want to pull your hair out and dig out a coffin in your little cubicle. Namjoon’s long legs always seem to catch up with you during your workweek, whether it’s to get coffee in the morning or to talk shit about the latest gossip in the breakroom. 

The bell of the glass door tinkles in your ears as you enter the café, relatively busy for the morning rush. While you wait in line, Namjoon ticks off your activity list for today. 

“Meeting with Victoria is cancelled this morning,” you groan in relief, your supervisor Victoria always scares the shit out of you even when she’s not doing anything, “and just the usual proofing and whatever we have to do on the third floor today—can I get a large iced Americano with a pump of caramel? Thanks,” Namjoon moves aside so you can throw your order in as well, “and after work could you stop by Vernon’s? He took a sick day today and he has most of the manuscripts for the next issue.” 

“Done and done,” you swipe your card in the dip, tucking your card away in your zippered pouch. “So like, do Americanos taste any good? Like it’s literally watered down espresso how do you pay to drink watered down tar—” 

Jungkook’s at the pick-up counter. Jungkook’s at the pick-up counter swirling stray sugar crystals with his thumb and putting them in his napkin. What an impeccable display of Virgo energy, absentmindedly cleaning things he has no business doing. You scoff to yourself, recalling this morning that Jisoo got off the phone this morning with a stupid smile on her face. From the mirror image that Jungkook is excluding while he’s smiling on his cellphone like a smitten teenager, it seems like they’ve made up. 

Nevertheless the hurt from last night is still fresh in your bones, and you force yourself to look away despite the fact that your morning pick-me-ups are almost done and are sitting tauntingly next to Jungkook’s elbow. Does he really need to learn against the counter like he owns it? Hair slightly damp from the shower, your heart beats a little faster at the fresh image.His biceps are straining against his charcoal lycra long sleeve, which is slightly damp from his morning run. Snap out of it! You are a mature, working woman who does not swoon in the view of bulgy muscles, especially when the man who owns those muscles is taken. Suddenly there’s a call of your name, and two cups and a paper bag are put in front of Jungkook. 

He blinks, and you immediately pale when you see his eyes flit over your name surrounded by your favorite coral pink beverage. You feel struck as his head perks up at the name and he narrowly makes eye-contact—

“The fuck you’re doing,” Namjoon gripes, shoving your guava iced tea and croissant in your chest, “standing there like a moron as if we don’t got shit to do today.” 

“Sorry,” you mumble, pulling at the brown paper bag to tug a piece of croissant between your teeth. The warmth, buttery pastry melts in your tastebuds. Ah, bread. Nothing like a little bit of carb to make you feel better. 

You’re suddenly thankful for Namjoon’s gargantuan torso from effectively blocking you from Jungkook, hauling you out of the coffee shop like a petulant toddler. He doesn’t even give you a chance to catch another secret look at the object of your affections, making sure you’re back in your work game before you enter the building. Even if he doesn’t know it, Kim Namjoon’s always got your back. 

Or in today’s case, breathing down your back. 

Without your third editor and a hard deadline coming up by the end of the week, you and Namjoon are working in tandem throughout your 9-5 to complete drafts for Big Hit Publishings Arts & Media section. Both of you take turns to bring snacks and feed each other, feeling like reading zombies and slaves to your desk as you remind each other to breathe throughout the whole ordeal. 

In complete honesty you don’t totally mind. Namjoon is a great partner-in-crime, and you both love what you do and do a damn good job at it. You call it “Buzzfeed but with Benefits.” 

And at least for today, you could quell the feelings in your chest from last night and this morning. Sure, you’ve always been okay with the pining you’ve had for Jungkook. The feeling comes and goes whenever it pleases, and since yesterday you’ve been okay with just admiring from afar and being their third wheel. 

However, now the feelings are acutely comparable to a third-degree burn with the help of Jisoo playing with fire. 

With a quiet exhale, you concede in your gaming chair (because it’s just so damn comfy to keep in the office.) You’re an adult and not a petty child, and you will not let this piece of information derail you from your calm, stable lifestyle. 

But honestly? Fuck Jisoo. 

“Let’s go, buckaroo,” Namjoon logs off for you, the cinnamon-y smell of his shampoo effectively waking up your senses, “it’s already 5:30. And you said you’d stop by Vern’s to get his drafts.” 

“Right,” you blurt, mindlessly putting away your papers and snack wrappers in your bag. You can’t believe the whole day’s gone already. 

“Maybe you don’t even have to go to his apartment. Just text him or whatever.” 

“Sounds good, thanks Joonie.” 

“And y/n?” Namjoon gives you a look that causes you to force a terse smile, one you give one too many times to higher-ups at work. It isn’t to insult Namjoon by any means, but you guys are partners, the kind that tell way too much but hide just enough to remain close from afar. “Take it easy, will you?” 

“I will,” you concede, stretching your arms, “I’m def overdue for a massage.” 

“You don’t look sick,” you scoff, taking in the casual look your co-editor boasts as he leans casually against the doorway. 

Hansol Vernon Chwe is the epitome of fluffy, decked out in large electric blue sweats and his russet brown hair curling softly above his porcelain skin. Not only is he your co-editor, but also a friend from college. Not to the extent that you were with Jisoo and Jungkook, but you operated in the same publishing club and managed to get partnering internships that made you the co-workers you are today. You see a little bit of that collegiate youth in Vernon right now, as he looks well-rested and fresh faced despite the fact he probably didn’t apply moisturizer or drink enough water today.

“But you kinda do,” he tilts his head, noting the heels that adorn your feet, “you’re wearing your sexy shoes today, that means something’s going on.” 

“Gee, ever the ladies’ man,” you scoff, getting under his arm to invite yourself inside, “all I want is the completed interviews so we can pick out the best parts and draft them. Then I’ll be on my merry way.” 

“Oh c’mon, we’ve been talking nothing but work this whole damn month. What happened to college when we’d talk hours about House Hunters, the safeness of library sex, that little furry thing in Lincoln Hall’s urinal? That was prime conversation.” 

“Vern, I’m just here for the drafts,” you sit at his tiny kitchen table, glaring at his open laptop.  

“You could’ve just emailed me,” he teases, twisting around his chair so he can rest his arms against the back. “But since you’re here, that means you probably wanna spill some tea but you’re too upset to admit it.” 

“If I talk will you stop talking like that?” 

“Yes. Give me the juicy details. Need some juicy juice.” 

“Nevermind, get out of my apartment.” 

“Uh, this is my apartment.” 

“My point still stands,” you make another face at his outfit, “you look like the blueberry girl from Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory.”  

Vernon purses his lips, scooting his chair closer to yours. He’s unfazed by your insult, far used to your defenses being higher up than Fort Knox. He looks up at you with his pretty lashes and deceivingly sweet caramel eyes, leaning his head along the backrest. “C’mon, tell me what’s bothering you,” he says in a gentle tone, coaxing you open. 

He always knew how to do it for you, a little bit of sweet talking and that clear open gaze always reduced you to shreds in university. For him, it always took a good meal and some sci-fi movies to get him to talk. That must be why you’ve stayed friends for so long, you two knew how to connect. 

Finally you crack, kicking off your shoes and hoping the sharp end doesn’t land on his cat. You hear Luna meow in protest but she’s got great reflexes. Unbuttoning the first three buttons of your stuffy blazer, you air out your cleavage, not caring about Vernon’s gaze. He’s seen worse. 

“Remember Jeon Jungkook? Majored in graphic design.”

“Ah, yeah. The guy who like, lived at the gym and the dining hall? Haven’t seen him in a minute,” his eyes seem to glaze over the glory days, reminiscing in the simultaneous safetynet and stressor that made up your early twenties, “didn’t you guys hit it off real well? Like I remember you ditched like—three sci-fi nights to study with him. Who even studies at 1AM?” 

“Yeah, we did,” and you can’t help but frown at as you remember the 7-Eleven runs, the utter warmth you felt when he would wipe a stray rice grain off your cheek, and how happy you felt to laugh so much with him it hurt, “but uh. Jisoo got drunk last night, because they had a fight. And she sort of admitted to me that she sabotaged our relationship and told Jungkook I wasn’t interested in him so they could start dating. Two years later and here we are.” 

A pause. And then, “Want a beer?” 

Vernon doesn’t even wait for a response when he gets up, bare feet slapping against the tile as he prepares some drinks and snacks for you. 

“That’s pretty fucked up,” he practically sing-songs among the cacophony of popcorn pop-pop-popping in the microwave. The aroma of buttery kernels is all but a relief, reminding you of movie matinees, “and like, she knew you liked him! It was totally obvious, even if you didn’t spell it out for her.” 

“Yeah,” you practically gushed to Jisoo those past two months, every waking moment with heart-eyes over the talented graphic designer Jeon Jungkook. 

“I can’t believe Jisoo would keep that a secret from you for so long. Like, can you even trust her anymore?” 

“Don’t know, was she even my bestfriend or was I just a good roommate to her?” you ask. Vernon is holding two beers in one hand and a bag of popcorn by the tips of his fingers in the other, careful to not burn himself. Opening the beer for you, you thank him and take a long swig.

“Well, good thing you’re still not in love with him or whatever. That would really suck. Unless—”

The look on your face says it all. You’re practically snotting into your bottle, your face tucked into your chin as you fight hard to stop the tears you’ve been suppressing for the last two years. “Don’t give me your pity,” you garble, turning away from the sad look Vernon gives you as he wraps his arms around you. 

The tears are soft and gentle, flowing freely onto the cotton of Vernon’s arms as you let it out. 

“‘M’not,” he concedes, rubbing his chin into your neck. He really is a lot like Luna, just like his  cat ready to give you affection. “Let’s just, get some take-out and watch Hamilton or something.” 

He lets you wear his matching sweat suit, lime green, as you order Thai food and rap along to Hamilton’s sick beats. Vernon does a better job keeping the flow, but you’re having a good time being his hype man as he parades around the living room like it’s 1776. 

You go home that night around ten o’clock, feeling noticeably lighter and more relaxed. Be that it may you are still wearing the sweatpants and heels ensemble, you feel comforted. 

The apartment is quiet when you walk in, not a single light turned on. You get a slice of the city lights bleeding in from the organza curtains, which allow you to kick off your heels and hobble to where you think the kitchen counter is. 

Today is Jisoo’s day to cook dinner. You can tell she decided to cook today from the faint smell of Japanese curry and a small unwashed plate in the sink. Whenever it was someone’s turn, they usually left an extra bowl or serving in it for the other roommate when they got home. Unsurprisingly, you find no such thing on the counter or in the fridge. 

You’re not upset, but rather decided. If Jisoo is going to let your friendship fade off with no intention of redeeming herself, then you should give her the same amount of energy back. You realize now the apology she gave last night wasn’t for you, but empty words to make her feel better and mend whatever toxicity she’s created in her own relationships. People like Namjoon and Vernon reminded you that you didn’t need to try and earn other people’s friendships. 

It’s disappointing, but the feeling is all but too familiar. 

If you could describe Jisoo as anything, it would be the color pink. Blushing, beautiful, beguiling pink. The way she flushes when Jungkook does an uncalled for grandiose gesture of romance, or when she wears a hot magenta number when she’s hosting a fashion show. Jisoo is the personification of La vie en rose, unbothered and unabashed.  

But now all you see when you think of Jisoo? Nothing but red. 

With that, you go in your room and untack the polaroid of you and Jisoo at the carnival last month, putting it away in your junk drawer to be forgotten. 

“You’re running away.” 

“Am not.” 

“Are too,” that interjection comes from Vernon’s roommate, Jung Hoseok. He’s been watching you two bicker over work for the past hour while he plays GTA5, failing to get a good hard carry because you and Vernon are too busy discussing whatever finishing touches you need on your final draft. 

“No one asked for your opinion, Jung,” you throw over your shoulder. 

“I’m just saying,” Hoseok flicks his wrist and nabs a tank, “you never wanna go home, you eat all our food, and I found your pyjamas in my laundry basket.” 

“You said your basket was the blue one,” you hiss under your breath. 

“The navy blue one,” Vernon chirps unhelpfully, “not the electric blue one.” 

Hoseok hits “save” on his campaign, disconnecting from his PS4 and stretching his lean limbs. “I mean, we could use a third roommate,” Hoseok jokes, getting up from the couch and grabbing a handful of M&Ms from your bowl, “you do make a bomb mac n’cheese.” 

“Appreciated,” you relent when Hoseok presses a kiss to your cheek and tells Vernon he’ll be back late working, leaving you and Vernon alone in their shared apartment. When Hoseok is gone, you stare at the door, tilting your head, “y’know,” you remark, “Hoseok’s a cool guy, why did I never hang out with him in college?” 

“Because he was stoned the majority of senior year and you just didn’t vibe with that crowd.” 

“Oh, yeah.” 

“But, you’re trying to change the subject,” Vernon carefully untacks your hands from your keyboard, knowing that you two have already been done with this month's issue and you’re now just mindlessly re-reading emails. “You’ve been here since Thursday, and now it’s Saturday. And as much as Hoseok and I like having you around so you can wake me up before we go to work, it’d be nice to throw me a bone and let me in on what you’re thinking right now.” 

You frown, noting Vernon’s large hand covering your laptop closed. He isn’t going to remove his hand anytime soon unless you talk. “Jungkook’s helping Jisoo pack up her half of the apartment this weekend and I don’t want to be there,” you say, short and simple. 

“You miss her?” 

“Yeah,” you admit honestly. You hate this version of yourself, unable to even look at Jisoo nowadays despite the fact you’re under the same roof for the remainder of the month. It’s hard to believe that the roommate from six years ago finally got under your skin, cancelling out all the years of friendship because of one silly relationship, “sad she doesn’t want to be my friend anymore.” 

“Did you talk about it?” 

“There’s nothing to talk about,” you reply despondently, “if she cared at all she would’ve to apologize again by now.”

Vernon figures, and his neutral expression doesn’t change as he leads you to the couch, brushing away Hoseok’s things so you two can get comfy. You busy yourself with the remote, exiting the PS4 homepage to scroll Netflix. 

“And are you trying to get over him?” 

“I mean, yeah,” you have been, but it’s a little hard when you’ve been contentedly pining. It was easy to keep your feelings bottled up because you originally thought Jisoo and Jungkook were meant to be for each other for the past two years. Now you're still pining but ruefully bitter at Jisoo.

“It’s not fair, y’know. She broke girl code, bros before hoes. Or is it chicks before dicks?” Vernon shakes his head at his lame attempt to get you to smile, which works anyway because Vernon’s silly and his sense of humor always gets you a little loose. “It’s your house too, you shouldn’t feel like you don’t belong there.” 

“Well I was supposed to help her move out this weekend, and I’d prefer it if Jungkook didn’t know what was going on.” 

“What?” your friend furrows his thick brows together, tucking his hands under his knees as he leans into your stubborn expression. “You’re gonna let Jungkook go on with his life not knowing that his relationship is based on a lie. That’s not cool. Even if you’re into him, he’s still your friend.” 

Damn, when did Vernon get so good at giving advice? Truth is Vernon’s always been good at dishing advice, you’ve just been privy to what you wanted to reveal to him. The first year or so being together outside of college was always about work, saving each other’s asses to ensure you two got that promotion and aim higher and higher. Now that goal is out of the way, and what better way to reconnect over some shoddy romance straight out of a Degrassi special? 

“I know,” you hug your knees tight to your chest, “when I’m ready, okay?” 

“Okay,” he agrees, because he’s not a pusher, “do you know the best way to get over someone?” 

“What?” 

“The best way to get over someone, is to get under someone," he emphasizes that point with his hands, sliding one under the other with a wiggle of his thick brows.

You slap him on the shoulder, “Vern, you disgust me.” 

“But it works!” 

“I’m not going on Tinder to find a fuckbuddy.” 

“You don’t have to look on Tinder or Tumble.” 

“Bumble.” 

“Whatever,” and his eyes flicker to his lap, where his pale fingertips turn red as he grips the edge of a throw pillow. "If you really don't wanna find someone, I can help." 

Is Vernon offering himself up? He is offering to fuck your brains out in the hope that you could inevitably fuck out your interest in Jungkook? Your eyes flicker over to Vernon's form on the couch, who's tucked in the couch just as you are. 

It’s true that you find Vernon attractive, and to some extent he definitely finds you attractive as well otherwise he wouldn’t have suggested the idea. It’s just that in college you never viewed him in that kind of light, probably because you were always so caught up in Jungkook. But tonight you can’t seem to ignore the eagerness hidden in Vernon’s carmine gaze, and how shiny and touchable his chocolate locks look under the setting sun. 

“I don’t want our friendship to change,” you reply slowly, furrowing your brows. “I appreciate it, but I don’t know. It sounds like a temporary fix.” 

“Can’t knock it if you don’t try it,” and out of curiosity, you don’t shy away when Vernon leans over to you, squeezing himself between the couch so he can tuck you in his arms. “I want to help you, but only if you want to.” 

Maybe it’s the frustration you feel with Jisoo, Jungkook’s ignorance, or the fact that you haven’t felt physical pleasure in such a long time, but you soften into Vernon’s hold. He’s relaxed, nothing betraying him as he waits patiently for your answer. You’ve always admired how much he kept up his “cool as a cucumber” demeanor. He isn’t the type of guy to let life pass him by, but he’s the kind of person who walks along life, embracing the ups and downs like old friends. He’s the ocean waves that crest along the shore, pushing and pulling along without a care in the world. 

He’s the textbook opposite of Jeon Jungkook, which is why you give Vernon the okay to lean in and press his lips against yours. 

His kisses are soft, and he takes great care in making sure you’re comfortable with this new step in your relationship. It almost feels as if you’re cutting corners, and you can’t help but feel a little guilty that you revel in the way Vernon’s hands trail under your too-large t-shirt. 

The pleasure you’ve ached for is there, bubbling low in the pit of your belly. It’s hard to get you out of your mind however, because this man isn’t the one you love. His kisses hold no power, only brief reprieve. Your heart doesn’t palpitate and your palms don’t sweat, you’re just languid. 

You’re greedy and selfish, but you remind yourself that it’s okay to allow yourself of these freedoms, even for a little bit. As Vernon finds your sweet spot that has you rolling your hips against his, you find that temporary fix isn’t a bad start at all. 

When you trudge back to your apartment that night after much reluctance, your face is still flushed and you think you smell a little too much like Vernon’s cologne. But the fact that still stands is that you're satiated, and you feel a tiny percent closer to moving on. 

The television is glowing with a terrible reality TV show, angry brides upset over cake layers or whatever. Jungkook and Jisoo have fallen asleep on the couch, surrounded by half-empty boxes. Jungkook has his arm lazily over Jisoo, her petite body fitting perfectly between his chest and the crook of his neck. 

You scoff when you spy Jisoo's bedazzled manicure digging into Jungkook's bicep, as if someone's going to take him away if she doesn't hold tight.

With stiff muscles you spare one look at Jungkook, ignoring the pang in your chest as you weave between boxes to turn the TV off. Barely an iota of your feelings have dissipated since your previous tryst with Vernon not an hour ago. Looking at Jungkook brings it all back, unfortunately. You suppose the feelings will pass with time. The soft hum of the television ceases, and you’re bathed in a room that feels dark and empty, despite the apparent life in the room. 

There’s some bleary talk coming from the couch as you walk to your bedroom, and if Jungkook is sleepily mumbling your name in question, you pretend you don’t hear. 

“So, where’s y/n? I thought she was going to help us pack.” 

It’s an innocent enough question, as Jungkook scans the corner of the living room hallway that leads to the bedrooms. You haven’t come out yet. He knows that you love sleeping in on the weekends, but he hopes the smell of fresh food will coax you to the table. His pan is sizzling in protest, telling Jungkook to quit talking and flip the hashbrowns. He's fried up three, in the hopes you’d be up for some crispy potatoes. He knows how much you love potatoes, especially at 2AM when you’re craving fries and a McFlurry combo. 

Instead Jisoo mutters, “You toasted too much bread, you know I don’t eat bread like this,” she’s pulling slice by slice out of the toaster, until there’s a stack of six golden toasts in the middle of the kitchen table. 

A little part of him wishes to quell the precursor to the argument there. It would be so easy for Jungkook to say, “the extras are for me” because he’s trying to gain weight, and that would be that. 

Instead he continues with his unanswered question and replies honestly, “I made extra toast for y/n, babe. She was supposed to help us pack but I haven’t seen her all weekend.” But he’s pretty sure you came home last night, unless that was his imagination. 

Jisoo pulls a carafé of apple juice out of the fridge, pouring the amber liquid into two glass cups. “Ah, she said she had some last minute things to do for work. Y’know, Big Hit always wants a big hit.” 

He chuckles, tilting his head as Jisoo gives him a small smile from the kitchen table. Jisoo is always good at cheesy jokes. “She must love her job, huh.” 

“Yeah.” 

“Her articles are really good, too,” the air smells like butter and Italian seasoning, as he places one hash brown on Jisoo’s plate, and two on his. He knows you edit in the Arts & Media section, and loves how you make it a point to include video games and modern graphics when it’s deemed appropriate. “She did a piece on the evolution of RPG and I thought her commentary was really spot-on.” 

He brings breakfast over to the table, while Jisoo places two slices of toast on his plate, one buttered and one with strawberry preserves. Breakfast is a quiet, but peaceful affair. Jungkook takes note of how Jisoo takes extra long to complete her meal, her fork creating ribbons in her little blob of magenta jam. He allows himself to complete his first hashbrown and a slice of toast before asking the difficult question. 

“Are you and y/n okay?” and he also takes note when Jisoo’s ministrations on her jelly stop, as she looks up at him with her big brown eyes. 

“We’re fine,” she insists, “just normal roommate issues, I promise.” 

“Maybe I should text y/n,” Jungkook says, pulling out his phone. “Lemme help you fix this, wouldn’t want you and her in a bad place when you’re about to move out.” 

“Baby, why are you so concerned about y/n?” Jisoo croons while his thumb hovers over your contact, his screen showing a two-year old selfie you two took during a study session early on in your friendship. He can’t remember the last time you two took a picture together out of spite, one without Jisoo. Jisoo’s hand pulls him away from his phone, rubbing small circles between his palm. 

He wants to ask, why aren’t you? But he sees the terseness in Jisoo’s smile, as her eyes fix between the interlocked fingers. He has a feeling he’s hovering somewhere he isn’t allowed to be in. Maybe it really is roommate stuff and it’s none of his business, but he feels a little insulted being left out because you and Jungkook are just as much best friends as you were in college. 

Or are you? 

This question plagues him throughout the day, and when Jungkook packs enough boxes for the weekend and says he needs to go home, Jisoo for once doesn’t argue. Normally Jisoo would cling to him like a koala, murmur simultaneously adorable and dirty things in his ear and lead him to her bedroom to coop up for hours on end. But Jisoo says she’s tired and needs some alone time, which is also fine. 

He doesn’t feel like going home, and instead heads straight to the gym. A couple pumps wouldn’t hurt, and it would clear his head. It’s nearly five in the evening when his body is thrumming with the afterglow of his post-workout, and he decides to take a little cool down in the mall and treat himself to a smoothie. 

It must be kismet when he sees you coming out of the bookstore, looking a little winded but no less professional in your beige blazer set and rose gold iPad. Whenever he hung around your apartment with Jisoo and you’d come home from work, he’d make it a point to acknowledge your plethora of multicolored skirt-suits. He never needs to be professional in his place of work, and admires how much effort you put in. 

“Hey!” he jogs up to you, and he catches the way your shoulders jump at his voice. “We missed you today.”

Your smile curls into something dry, and you twist your spine like rusty hinges to face him. In turn, his smile dims a little, wondering if he’s doing something wrong. Maybe you’re tired? He catches the line of sweat that glistens your baby hairs, and how your hair is done up but has fallen a few centimeters with some pieces falling out. 

“Jungkook,” you exhale, “lifting boxes wasn’t enough of a workout?” 

“You know me,” he replies stiffly, hiking his backpack higher upon his shoulder. Why does this conversation feel so awkward? “So, finishing up work? Sucks you have to work on a Sunday.” 

“Ah, it wasn’t so bad,” you face relaxes a little as you explain your work, “it was children’s day at the bookstore and they were watching Disney movies. I’m writing a piece on how I believe Ratatouille is Pixar’s magnum opus. Interviewed some kids, I wanted an expert opinion.”  

“Ratatouille is the superior film,” he declares with a firm nod, “after all, anyone can cook.” He revels in the small smile he manages to retrieve from you, immediately understanding the inside joke. If he came out of the gym five minutes earlier, he probably would’ve been able to catch you in the bookstore. What a shame, he would’ve loved to see you play around with the kids. 

At the mention of food, the mall manages to silence itself enough for him to catch the grumbling coming from your stomach. He laughs when your cheeks heat. 

“I was on my way to get some smoothies,” he jabs a thumb in the direction of the food court, “wanna catch up and get a bite?” 

“Oh, I don’t know, I have a lot of work to edit,” disappointment pangs in his chest at your easy rejection, but he ignores it, “I kinda wanna save some money too, still not sure if I’m staying in the apartment after Jisoo moves.” 

He doesn’t know what compels him to take your shoulders and wheel you in the direction of the food court, much to your protest and whines. “C’mon, explain to me why Ratatouille is the magnum opus—I need to defend why The Incredibles is superior. I’ll treat you to dinner.” 

“What? I can pay for my own food—” 

“And I can’t treat my best friend to a nice meal once in a while?” 

That has you stopping in your tracks, and Jungkook nearly barrels his chest into your head if not for the grippy soles of his Adidas Ultraboosts. He can’t see your face, but his hands note how your muscles cord tightly between the cotton of your blazer. 

He doesn’t understand why you’re so tense. Was it because he called you his best friend? Well, you are? At one point he felt that way, early on in college. The position just stuck with you. And when Jisoo told him you weren’t interested, he was perfectly fine with the platonic relationship. It was nice to have someone to talk media and video games to, someone not as chaotic as Jimin and someone not as deterred as Yoongi. 

Although, maybe as of late he hasn’t been so much of a friend. It’s no one’s fault, he’s been caught up with work and Jisoo’s move, he hasn’t said so much as a “hey how are you” when you’re around. He can’t blame you. 

Suddenly his mind blanks, the mall fading away as he focuses on how small you look as your eyes dart between the parking lot and the food court. Jisoo and Jungkook have been so caught up on each other lately, that he fears you’re starting to separate yourself.

“Um, this place is good,” you tug him by the elbow and lead him to a fast food joint. 

When he picks up both your orders and comes over to your saved table, you’re talking animatedly on the phone. You’re laughing, looking at Jungkook as if he’s the one intruding and you’re muttering a hushed “sorry” as you continue the tail end of the conversation. 

“Yes, Joonie. Go with section two, I know my shit. I’m your Work Wife for a reason, Umji in PR could never compare,” you’re giggling like you’re five years younger, and Jungkook feels stuck in a timelapse. 

He watches you go, throwing around names and terms that he’s so lost on but so desperate to understand. He knows nothing about your life other than the one that’s tied with Jisoo, which is a damn shame. Since when did he inevitably downgrade you from “best friend” to “his girlfriend’s roommate?” 

“I’m sorry,” you turn your phone over and push it to the side, giving Jungkook a smile as well, albeit weaker, “let’s dig in!” 

To his relief the dinner goes as good as it should be. You have your tray practically overflowing at the seams, all on Jungkook’s dime. It has his heart swelling with pride, he hasn’t seen you eat in a long time. There’s fries spilling out from the corners, and two sandwiches because you couldn’t decide between a chicken sandwich and a burger. 

Food gets you amicable, and he doesn’t mind when he does most of the talking. You’re engrossed in his talk, lettuce hanging out of your mouth as you’re rapt with attention as he recalls a story that happened at work recently with Mingyu. You ask questions in all the right places and he sucks up all your attention like a happy pill, and it feels nice to be able to lead a conversation for once. 

“Jeez, I’m getting the burger sweats,” you giggle to yourself, and his smile brightens at your positive change in attitude. Food always helps. 

When you remove your thick high-collar blazer, that’s when he sees it. 

“Seeing someone?” he asks, eyes flickering curiously towards the violet bruises that bloom across your neck. 

“What–oh,” you have the audacity to look embarrassed, hands clutching your neck like a shield, “no, just a hookup.” 

A messy hookup, too. Unless you had a thing for showing off marks, which doesn’t seem to be the case. “Didn’t peg you for someone who hooks up,” he says more to himself than you, but you catch him on his impulse jab. 

Your eyes narrow and your defenses go up, “I’m trying to get over someone,” you snip back, busying your hands by crushing up your greasy sandwich wrappers. 

“Am I allowed to state my opinion?” 

“Since you asked so politely, no.” 

He sighs, “I just don’t think that’s the best way to get over someone,” heck, Jungkook doesn’t even know who exactly you’re trying to get over. He just knows that you’re far too smart and independent to let yourself resort to such matters. 

“It isn’t, but it’s really the best option as of now,” you reply curtly. 

And his gaze saddens as he sees you fold your blazer over your arm, indicating that your time is up. Jungkook is aware the comment he made is out of line, and it weakens him knowing that you don’t even want to pick a fight with him. He can’t even find it in himself to apologize properly. 

He doesn’t know if he’s more sad that you’re pining over someone unattainable or upset at himself for not knowing you’ve been harboring feelings for someone. If you really think hooking up is your only option, you must be really hung about whoever you’re into as of late. 

“If it’s worth anything,” Jungkook adds, wanting to leave on a high note, “fuck that guy. He clearly doesn’t deserve you.” 

A small, secret smile plays on your lips, “Yeah, I like to believe that.” 

“I’m anxious,” Namjoon’s mantra makes the whole energy in the room wobbly, paired with the fact the two of you are squished between cardboard boxes as Jungkook aimlessly moves things around like a Tetris screen. 

The only time you feel remotely comfortable basking in your home is when Jisoo is gone. Oh-so conveniently is the Big Hit building undergoing maintenance today, so you and Namjoon have decided to work from home in your apartment. Although you thought by now that Jisoo’s boxes would be long gone and tucked away in Jungkook’s place, instead you’re living in an episode of Ed, Edd and Eddy and the cardboard is practically wall-to-wall. You also thought by now that Jungkook would have no reason to show up unannounced anymore, but apparently that’s not the case. 

“I have, anxiety,” Namjoon adjusts his glasses for the nth time this afternoon, brain not fixed enough to focus on the screen of his chrome MacBook, “anxiety, anxiety. I can’t right now. I need my weighted blanket and a pillow.” 

“Namjoon, I can get both of those for you if we just send in this last spread,” you coo gently, as if placating a baby. You make brief eye contact with Jungkook from the other side of the room, his lips quirking in amusement as he stacks a box of clothes by the kitchen. 

“Do you feel my palms? My palms, they’re like a fucking fountain you need to feel them—” your Wusband approaches you like a zombie, leaning over you and tripping over his criss-crossed legs before he topples over you. 

“Blegh, get off of me you sweat giant!” you cry with a good-natured laugh, although the grip of Namjoon’s palms under your shoulders are damp and slimy, “Joon, I can’t get you your blanket if you’re crushing my boobs.” 

Namjoon finally relents, untacking himself to rest his chin on your glass coffee table. “Fine.” 

“Look over the last column and I’ll bring your blanket, okay?” 

Pushing yourself off the ground, you shuffle your way out of the living room through the maze of boxes and into the hallway. It feels like your apartment is less of an apartment and more of a storage space when you’re trapped in-between two lines of boxes, and Jungkook effectively blocking you from entering your room. He was just in the living room but now he’s come from the linen closet, standing between the entrance of your room. 

“Sorry,” he pops his head out from a smaller box, one filled with designer costume jewelry. 

“It’s fine,” you chirp, barely making eye contact as you shuffle over the boxes. 

Your toe drags over the lid of one of the open boxes in an attempt to move diagonally. You nearly crash your face into the hardwood if not for Jungkook’s arm stretching out to catch you. In seconds he manages to catch all your weight in one hand, pulling you to him with your hip pressed against his. Your breath traps itself in your neck. Your subconscious fears that if you speak now, you’ll babble about how attractive it is that he’s able to catch you as easily as grabbing a light sheet of paper. 

“Careful,” his voice rumbles in his throat as he regards you with a wan smile. 

Your “thanks” is barely uttered as you slip into your room, heaving your weighted blanket and a pillow in your arms to let Namjoon borrow. 

The burgundy quilted fabric is hunched over your shoulder, draped around your body so it’s easier for you to carry on your back. You try to eradicate the memory of Jungkook’s arms, lean and strong as he held you to him moments before.

Ugh, you thought messing around with Vernon would stop your silly pining. It seems that it’ll take more than a couple rounds to satiate your curiosity. For such a kind guy, Jungkook seems like a wolf in sheep’s clothing when it comes to the bedroom. 

You can imagine him being so kind in the beginning, coaxing you to wan and bend to his every wish and command. And then when you keen a little too hard at the attention, you bet a switch would flip and he’d grab you—

The blanket flops around your back, and you’re sorely reminded that you’re thirsting over a taken man, yet again.  

Jungkook makes it extremely difficult for him to be hateable. It’s by nature that he’s just so damn likeable. Heck, he’s pretty much packed seventy percent of the things Jisoo should be packing right now. 

Making sure not to trip again, on your feelings and your blanket, you successfully reach a tired Namjoon. You tuck your koala-shaped pillow under your co-editor’s arms, and drape the heavy blanket over him like a cape. He’s giving you a thumbs up and a toothless smile, the previous meltdown overcome as he focuses on finishing the last of today’s work. He’s slipped on some noise-cancelling earphones, presumably filled with generic coffee-house music or rain playlists. 

Wordlessly you go to your nook to prepare some tea. It’s getting late and a warm cup would distract you from the impending deadline. Despite the fact that you and Namjoon are 99% of the way done, his previous freak-out has you on live-wire and you could use a little caffeine. 

Placing three mugs on the counter you call, “Jungkook, tea?” 

“Yes please,” you stiffen when you feel Jungkook magically appear right behind you, his head peering over your shoulder, “with milk and honey.” 

Deciding to give Jungkook the beehive-shaped mug because it’s very on-brand for him, you begin to steep the leaves in your kettle while he spoons the honey. 

“So,” his words are slow as the drip of honey, the amber goo taking its time to descend into his mug as it falls from the dipper. “Is that the guy you’re trying to get over?” 

Jungkook lifts his brows towards Namjoon, who is softcore jamming to his white noise playlist. It’s cute as to how curious Jungkook is about Namjoon. While you try to keep your work life separate, there really isn’t much backstory to your personal life to warrant that kind of divide. 

“Namjoon,” you state aloud, watching Namjoon sing badly to himself, “why, are you gonna beat him up for me?” 

“I can take him,” you can practically hear Jungkook’s chest pop out. 

With a roll of your eyes, you reach to kill the heat off the tea kettle, “No need. He isn’t the guy I’m trying to get over.” 

“Oh, he’s your fuck buddy then?” 

“Shit!” being caught off guard, you grab at the handle of your kettle without a pot holder, burning your fingertips. In seconds Jungkook’s larger hand encases your own, pulling you over to the sink to soak your fingers in cool running water.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” Jungkook is chanting like a sinner at church, searching for any sign of pain in your visage, “I shouldn’t have asked while you’re working with a hot stove.” 

You suppress a sigh, relaxing your fingers as Jungkook soothes the burn with his gentle hold, “Shouldn’t have asked in the first place,” you mumble. 

“I know,” he replies, “guess I’m just feeling a little left out. We don’t talk like we used to. I guess I’m getting a little too nosy for my own good, aren’t I?” 

You don’t understand what’s going on with his incessant babbling as of late, but you chalk it up to work stress and Jisoo’s move. Having no answers to his honest reply, you gently untack your red palm from his grip, assuring him that you’re fine. 

Namjoon steps into your kitchenette, being surprisingly careful as he takes your potholder to pour himself a cup of tea. If the tea is oversteeped and bitter he doesn’t say anything, only leans against the counter as he regards you two with slow sips. “You alright?” 

“M’fine,” you reply stubbornly, avoiding Jungkook’s worried stare. 

Namjoon holds out his hand, “Hand.” 

“No—”

“Hand.” 

His deep voice coerces you, and you immediately slap the back of your palm onto Namjoon’s. Your partner brushes his golden hands over the tiny blister that’s forming over your fingertips. “Can’t have my Work Wife outta commission.” 

“Your Work Wife is fine,” you gripe back. 

Your co-worker’s eyes flicker over to Jungkook’s for a brief second, Jungkook regarding him in curiosity as he stares at your connected palms. “I have some aloe in my bag for sunburns,” Namjoon offers helpfully, ignoring the weird glances, “I’ll give it to you in a bit. Also, I’ve overcome my sudden bout of stress and I’m ready to email our progress to Victoria. We’re done for the day.” 

“Awesome, thanks Joonie,” you exhale, relaxing against the sink, “wanna go eat somewhere?” 

“There’s a niche place in Itaewon if you wanna check it out?” Namjoon offers.

Jungkook interjects, “Jisoo ordered pizza if you guys wanna share with us?” 

“Pizza also sounds good—” 

“We don’t wanna interrupt your alone time,” you gracefully cut in, stepping in front of Namjoon despite the fact that he’s easily towering over you. 

Jungkook snorts, “I’ll have enough alone time with her when she moves in, don’t worry. Besides, I ordered three pies because I wanted to try three different flavor combos. I need two additional judges.” 

“Thanks Jungkook but,” you stifle a cry when Namjoon jabs you in the back with his thumb. It’s pressing, digging into the small of your back as if he’s trying to telepathically tell you that you’re being rude, “but… I don’t know if I can eat three slices! Namjoon on the other hand, can probably eat enough to fairly judge.” 

“Great,” Jungkook’s smile is blinding, causing your grin to stiffen as he looks for his phone to shoot Jisoo a quick text that they’re having dinner for four. 

Once Jungkook’s out of earshot, Namjoon tugs you by the sleeve, “The hell was that?” he hisses in your ear, “you look like you’re about to shit and piss your pants at the same time.” 

“I just don’t feel comfortable eating with them,” you cross your arms in defiance. You think back to just a week ago where you and Jisoo reluctantly attempted to eat breakfast together one morning. You provided minimal small talk while Jisoo clinged to her phone, replying to you in non-committal clipped tones. 

“Do I want to know?”

“No.” 

“Do you want me to leave?”

“No!” you retort, “you got me into this mess, you’re gonna stay with me ‘till the end.”

“I don’t know what you want from me, woman,” Namjoon throws his arms out exasperatedly, oolong tea nearly sloshing onto his hand, “just suck it up or I revoke your bragging rights to that snag you got on our spread next Monday.” 

“Not my fault you couldn’t get Kim Taeyeon on the spread,” you smirk. 

“Well I didn’t so happen to stalk the Sephora she frequents for the past two weeks—” 

“I didn’t stalk her I just so happened to need a new Fenty Gloss Bomb every other day—”

“I’m home, Jungkookie!” 

Your face contorts, your playful energy melting to the hardwood as your previous banter with Namjoon evaporates into thin air. Work bags in one hand and three boxes of pizza balancing in the other, Jisoo kicks off her heels somewhere across the door and places the pizza on the dining table. 

Jungkook immediately appears by her side, and you look away and Jisoo plants a heavy kiss on his lips. She cracks open one eye as she notices you and Namjoon hanging by the kitchenette, “Oh,” she mumbles at her audience, “you’re here?” 

Yes, you bimbo. I’m here in my own apartment. 

“I guess you didn’t read my text that they’ll be joining us for dinner,” Jungkook cuts in good-naturedly, “we have way too much pizza anyway. Have a seat, guys.” 

Jungkook navigates the kitchen as easily as your own, and you slump in your chair while Namjoon exchanges pleasantries with Jisoo. She looks impeccable, hair in a tight chignon and a tight navy dress as she converses with your co-editor. 

“I’m starving,” Jungkook announces, making sure to place a slice on Jisoo’s plate. He shuffles through the other boxes, making brief eye contact with you when he decides to put a slice on yours as well, “you like these toppings, right?” 

You regard the greasy, hearty piece of cheese and bread with a curt nod. You feel Jisoo’s eyes laser on your skin, “Yeah, thanks Kook.” 

Namjoon, Jisoo and Jungkook mostly stir up the conversation, you opting to eat as slow as possible to avoid any conversation. It’s easy to blend back and let them take over, as Jisoo loves to talk about her fashion firm and Namjoon is a great listener. 

Jungkook and Namjoon make it a point to direct the conversation to you from time to time, and you let the ball leave your court as soon as it lands. You prefer to keep your responses short and simple, especially when Jisoo is so eager to talk about the new silk drapes she’s installing for Jungkook’s windows.

Your phone buzzes in your lap, and you discreetly look under the table to read the incoming text message. 

vernie bernie: would u like to do the devil’s dance tonight

vernie bernie: or a tickle to my pickle? 

vernie bernie: beatin ya bean? 

You: ohmyGOD 

vernie bernie: or y’know, u could just come ovr and chill. Hobi made some bomb tres leches

You: call. Ill come after dinner

“Are you okay, y/n?” your head bounces up to meet Jungkook’s gaze, “you’ve barely eaten and you haven’t talked much.” 

“Oh you know, she’s just stressed about the upcoming spread,” Namjoon steps in for you, and you send him a discrete, but grateful smile. He’s always impeccable at reading the room, “she’s just nervous about her interview with Kim Taeyeon, but I think you did her interview justice.” 

“No way, the singer Kim Taeyeon?” Jungkook gushes, regarding you with stars in his eyes, “your interviews are always so great, y/n. You ask really good questions. Like that one spread about  Lee Yonghwa’s art gallery? Really cool.” 

You notice the way Jisoo presses her lips together, a thin line as if she’s trying to seal away words that she’ll regret saying. She’s jealous, and you can’t help the blush of pride that fills your veins as you raise a secret brow at her. 

“Right, you got nothing to worry about,” Namjoon squeezes your shoulder encouragingly, as if you’d get his double-meaning. 

“Thanks,” you reply, pushing your plate away and standing up, “I’m actually gonna go head to Vernon’s for a bit, though. He wants to double check his work before we email Victoria.” 

It’s a bald-faced lie, Namjoon sent the files to Victoria right before dinner, but he isn’t going to argue. 

“Okay,” Namjoon thanks Jungkook and Jisoo for the meal, stacking his plate atop yours, “I’ll walk out with you.” 

“It’s only been twenty minutes, though,” you see the slight panic in Jungkook’s gaze as he watches you quickly clean up for you and Namjoon. You can’t quite pin why he’s so concerned, after all he has been acting strange as of late. 

“Yeah, I’m full,” you reply curtly, licking your lips and avoiding his gaze. You already know what he wants to say, that he’s been in your apartment all day and all he’s seen you eat is stale chips and tea, “but we can do this again.” But hopefully not. 

“If you’re coming home late again,” it’s the first time Jisoo has spoken to you directly. You tilt your head to her slowly, watching the plastic smile carefully carved onto her expression. You see the contrived care and concern between her brows, “please try to be quieter next time, the last time you came home late you woke Jungkookie up.” 

Snapping your gaze to Jungkook you plaster on a thick smile, “Sorry Jungkook—” 

“What? No, it’s fine!” he furrows his brows in confusion, finally able to detect the strange tension between the two housemates, “I barely heard you—” 

“Maybe I’ll just stay the night at Vernon’s,” your eyes trail over to the pajama set you immediately switched into when you got home today, “wouldn’t want to disturb you two.” 

“Good,” Jisoo’s tone is saccharine and clipped as she tacks on a, “have fun.” 

It’s laudable, how much Jisoo wants to make a fool out of you but you won’t have it. You revel in the perplexed expression as Jungkook’s gaze darts back and forth between the two of you, wanting to butt in but unsure of how to approach it. Not giving him the time to, you bid the couple a goodnight and make a fast getaway. Heck, you don’t even take your work stuff with you. 

Once you’re out the door, Namjoon wordlessly gives you a hug. You sigh gratefully into his embrace. 

The next time Jungkook sees you, he reads the room before anything. You and Jisoo’s apartment is scarily empty, almost clinical. He’s tried texting you a few times after his failed-not-failed attempt at catching up at the mall and his awkward conversation concerning Namjoon, but you always reply back with vague replies and an unpromised promise of meeting up sometime soon. 

It dulls him to think that you’ve given up on him as a friend. But can you blame him? He needs to keep an appropriate distance for Jisoo, after all, she doesn’t like it when he gets too close to other women unless it’s strictly professional. Usually Jisoo’s jealousy inevitably works itself out and Jungkook doesn’t pose any problems because he has very few girl friends, but for some reason your friendship with him specifically gets Jisoo stiff in the face. Is it because you and Jisoo are so close? Possibly. 

But it doesn’t mean you can’t join the same Valorant server with him at 2AM and accidentally bomb each other, or argue over the magnum opus of each film company. Is that not enough? 

Jisoo’s working overtime, and Jungkook suggested last night that he move the boxes to the front of the door for easy pick-up when the moving truck arrives. Jisoo promises to buy Thai food in return, and with a kiss emoji she leaves him to audit fabric budgets. 

As he glides down to Jisoo’s room he notes that the pictures along the wall have disappeared, and there’s double the amount of boxes in the hallway. It seems that you’re moving out too. To where, he doesn’t know but he hopes it isn’t too far. 

He chides Jisoo remotely when he sees that her room is completely intact, and he makes moves to pack up her things. 

That’s when he finds his letter. Not a love letter to Jisoo, but a love letter to you. Deep in the recesses of Jisoo’s junk drawer, is a faded lavender envelope with a pressed cream colored baby’s breath taped up in plastic. The glue is yellow and old, clearly served its purpose due to the fact that the letter is already opened and the contents rumpled. 

Hey Pretty Girl–

He immediately stuffs the letter back in its holder, stricken at his messy handwriting from two years ago. It feels like he found a time capsule, another version of Jungkook confessing to you. He used to call you Pretty Girl, not enough for you to catch on to his feelings, but enough for you to understand that he did find you attractive. It was early on in your friendship. 

When you first asked him to be study partners for some silly class that had nothing to do with each other’s majors, he gaped like a guppy and pointed to himself. That day he went to class in last night’s clothes and a nest of fluffy strands. “Me?” he felt like absolute trash, and you were probably desperate due to the fact you two were the only seniors in this class, “but you’re a pretty girl… and I’m pretty dumb when it comes to this subject.” 

But instead you scoffed and pulled him from his slumped figure, dragging him to the library, with a wink and a “you’re pretty, too.” Those words have burned in his brain since then, as he wasn’t used to getting such off-handed compliments, especially from intelligent girls that wanted more than one night. 

For whatever reason you continued seeing his dumb self, even after the semester ended and together registered for one more class for spring. 

Whenever you’d go out for ice cream you wouldn’t hesitate to stuff your face and add for extra Oreos and fries, you’d assure Jungkook you’re not normally this much of a slob. 

Jungkook would just smile and offer you a napkin and say, “You’re still a pretty girl.” 

He fell for you gracefully. There was no regret, no walk of shame, no cliché late night party where you or him could’ve instigated it into the physical. It was all by feel. 

However the two of you took your time with your relationship, languidly enjoying the hushed conversations in the library at 2AM, the late night McFlurry runs, the integration of each other’s friends like it was natural. Ergo the lavender love letter. It was a gentle declaration, one he felt pretty confident in. 

So color him stupid when you passed him in class with a happy wave, Jungkook dumbfounded at how well you handled his confession. You weren’t oblivious, you just never read it. 

But now he knows the declaration was for whatever reason, lost in transit. “I should’ve known,” he whispers in the air, the letter crumpling in his grip. Composing himself, he pinches his brows.  

There’s an electronic buzz and a sharp slam of the front door. Judging by the time, you’re home. 

You flop onto your mattress, folding an arm over your head to stop the sun from seeping to your eyes. Vernon’s exhausted you, and you barely got away before he could have any say in it. You need a little space, and some time to think. 

Just as you close the door to your bedroom, it swings open. 

You gape as Jungkook thrusts himself into your bedroom like a deer with horns, looking pale. You follow his gaze, darkened eyes that linger a little too long on your neck again, and you narrow your eyes at him to avert. He looks a little red in the cheeks despite his pallidness, looking like he just got out of bed with messy wavy locks and his signature sweats. Is Jungkook packing for Jisoo again? 

Acutely aware that you smell like sweat and sex, you clutch the blankets closer to your body. “Uh, rude.” 

He looks uncharastically frantic, waving a letter in his hand, “Did you ever read this?” 

“Read what?” you ask, hands reaching out for the envelope. 

“My confession letter,” he blurts, having no shame now that all the gears are running through his head. “I wrote you a letter asking you out, because you said you wanted to collect notes like in Letters to Juliet. But I just found it in Jisoo’s drawer, why would it be there?” 

And all the pent up frustration that never seemed to escape under Vernon’s sheets, the feelings that never seem to subside, all bubble back to the surface. Now that Jungkook knows, there’s no hiding. 

You’re in shock, hands reaching for the letter despite the burn that seeps through your fingertips. Jungkook’s shoulders slump when you do indeed look like it’s your first time seeing this, as if a missing puzzle piece in your timeline has finally been revealed.

“I, I didn’t think you’d write me a letter,” you take the lavender envelope, clutching the letter by your chest like it’s something precious, “that’s so sweet,” you say to yourself.  

It dawns on him, “Wait, you knew about this? I knew something weird was going on.” 

“Only recently,” you frown. 

“And you didn’t think to tell me?” he nearly shouts, causing you to flinch, “no wonder why you were being so weird all this time. How could you let me live the rest of my life knowing this? That my relationship is built on a lie? ” 

“I don’t know,” you suddenly feel very small in your mattress as Jungkook rounds up on you, pulling your desk chair closer to your bed, “because you love Jisoo, of course.” 

“Well obviously that’s not possible,” and while yes a two-year realtionship ending like this is going to hit him hard tonight, he’s focused on you and the fact that you failed to tell him, “somehow I’d find out. Why wait for me to find out on my own?” 

“Because I wanted to protect you!” 

“Protect me,” he scoffs, crossing his arms and sneering at you. It causes you to tense up, feeling the telltale signs of tears bubbling to the surface, “you don’t even want to be friends anymore, y/n. I’ve tried to catch up to you so many times, but you keep leaving me hanging. I know I’ve been a pretty bad friend and I get it if you just feel awkward that I liked you, then that’s a shitty reason.” 

“Have you ever considered that it’s too late to tell you?” you shoot back, sitting up straight, “yes, I admit I should’ve told you earlier and I’m sorry, but it was a lot for me to process to y’know? Jisoo and I haven’t talked properly in weeks!” 

“Oh, so you’ve stopped trying to be friends with Jisoo too, huh? Just like you’re trying to stop being friends with me.” 

“No,” you pinch your brows, “she stopped being friends with me! She doesn’t care about me because she has you,” conflict burns in Jungkook’s gaze, and you only serve to fuel the fire, “she’s tried so hard to not involve me in your relationship.” 

“Just tell me why you’ve really kept this secret instead of saying you want to protect me like a baby—” 

“It’s because I’m in love with you, idiot!” 

You blink and back up against the wall of your bedroom, as if you can’t believe that the words came out of your mouth. 

It’s quiet again. The sour look evaporates from Jungkook’s face as he watches you suppress your sobs on your mattress. The room seems devoid, sucked out of its color as you’ve cleaned up most of your things, the only thing left being some plain grey sheets and a pillow. 

Jungkook’s mind is absolutely reeling, playing back memories from a different point of view. 

“When Jisoo told me she sabotaged our relationship so she could date you, I was so upset and didn’t know what to think,” you manage to place the lavender note on your wooden desk, making sure no tears could mar it. “And I thought I could move on and eventually stay friends with the both of you, but the next day Jisoo put all her attention on you and completely ignored me or any attempt to salvage our friendship. She only told me to forgive herself,” you’re hugging yourself, wrapping the blankets around you like a weak embrace, “so I thought if I cut myself out of the picture and forced myself to move on like I should’ve, everything would’ve been okay.” 

“So, you would’ve rather kept all this pain to yourself?” 

“Yeah,” you give him a teary smile, “because I wanted you to be happy.” 

And with an equally sad smile he murmurs, “But I’m not happy.” 

 Your face falls, and you really look at Jungkook. He’s exhausted as well, slumped in his chair. Has he been trying to grapple along the threads of his relationships, while you’ve been trying to loosen them? 

“What a waste of two years,” he slumps in your chair, letting the pieces click into place, “a relationship built on fake love. I was really trying, y’know. I thought I was going crazy.” 

The three of you have unknowingly been playing a futile game of Cat’s Cradle, a game that no one wins. 

Jungkook looks wistfully out the window, noting the pleasant day that fails to present itself in your tiny room. It feels simultaneously satisfying and bitter when it falls into place, your thoughts finally fitting together for the first time in months. “We could’ve loved each other. For real,” he says, and you silently agree. 

You’re still crying, shaking like a leaf in autumn. Jungkook’s arms hover awkwardly over yours, his warmth palpable despite the fact that he hasn’t touched you yet. With a timid smile you allow consent, and you melt like putty in his arms. 

“Kookie, ‘m so sorry I didn’t tell you sooner,” you murmur into his shoulder, not caring if it hurts when you press your chin into his skin. “I’m sorry you had to find out this way.” 

It’s been so long to have him close like this, the friend you’ve always wanted but never needed. Since college you’ve always imagined a life without him doing just fine, but that doesn’t mean you want to live without him, roommate’s boyfriend or not. 

“I’m sorry too,” he sighs back, “this sucks right now, but we’ll be alright.” 

The two of you sit in your room until it turns dark and the sky muddles into shades of twilight and egg yolk orange. There’s lulls in the conversation, the two of you filling in the gaps and making sense of the mumbo-jumbo that’s been going on in your consciousness up until this point. Your insantities turn sane, and by the time Jisoo’s making her way back inside with the smell of pad thai, Jungkook is ready. With a squeeze to each other and a press of your lips because you don’t know what to say, you tuck yourself in and pretend to fall asleep. 

“Messy, messy, messy,” Vernon sing-songs, knocking his heels against the wall. 

The both of you are sitting upside-down, butts attached to the wall connecting to his mattress and your feet hanging in the air. Your mint floral organza socks pad against his Pink Floyd poster, while his yellow tube socks are heeling against some old Polaroids from college. There’s no prospect of sex today, not when shit just hit the fan. 

Today you and Vernon are just two old friends and very close co-workers. 

“Tell me about it,” you bemoan, frowning at the beige wall, “this whole week’s just been a whole mess. It’s like, warm tuna salad.”

“Gross,” Vernon grimaces at the apt comparison, “so what happens now?” 

You sit up on your elbows, looking down at Vernon’s peaceful expression, “What do you mean?” 

“Like, are you gonna get together with him?”

You snort, flopping back down on his bed. The blankets fluff around you and you inhale the pine scented sheets. “After all that? No.” 

“But you still love him?” 

It must sound dumb to still love him after all this time. You wouldn’t be surprised if Vernon thought you’re silly to still hold a place in your heart for someone who has fifteen million things on their plate now. After all the physicality and the space Vernon gave you in his home, your feelings haven’t wavered. 

Your companion doesn’t bother waiting for your answer, hearing your answer somewhere in the air as he gets up and throws on his denim jacket. Rolling over your stomach you ask, “Where are you going?” 

“Some friends down in printing want to meet up for drinks,” Vernon messes up his hair, making the waves part in that little coiff that makes his jawline look sharp. “I heard Yerin really wanted me to come, so.” 

You can’t help the little middle school coo that comes from your lips, causing Vernon to giggle and throw a pillow at you. “Yerin’s cute!” you declare, remembering the petite girl in overalls who’s all about pops of yellow and violet, “you're into her?” 

“Nah,” Vernon holds up two hats in his hands, gesturing for you to pick one. “Just figured it was a push in the right direction.” 

Crawling out of his bed you stumble in your oversized t-shirt, tucking a finger under your chin as you decide between the emerald bucket hat and the red Ralph Lauren baseball cap. You pull out both hats from his hands and set it down on his vanity, opting to smooth out the flyaways and ringing your fingers through his soft curls. “And what direction would my free-flowing friend be going today?” you ask aloud, “you look better with your hair out,” you declare firmly, “makes you look like a fluffy CEO.” 

He laughs at your silly comparison, and he gently moves your hand away from his hair when you linger a little too close to him. His gaze is solemn as he regards you with a gentle smile, “Keep your distance, I’m tryna get over someone,” he says simply, and your arm falls limp at your sides. 

Your heart thuds in a different direction, your mouth parting but no words coming to the surface. When was the last time you asked about Vernon’s needs, wondered if he was doing alright, making sure you two were on the same page—

“You’re spiraling,” he reads you like a playbook, smoothing down your hair to press a kiss to the crown. Suddenly you feel guilty for not having sparks in your belly, shaming your conscience for not even considering his sacrifices in your self-absorption these past few weeks. “Like I said, I wanted to help you. Stop looking like a kicked puppy, it’s okay to be selfish.” 

With transparent tears the two of you pack up and head to your next destination. Hands ghosting between each other you make your way to the exit of Vernon’s apartment, him to meet up with his friends while you have to unpack your new apartment. With a hug you tell each other you’ll see them on Monday, and as easy as that you go your separate ways.

Hey Pretty Girl—

I kinda wanted to tell you this in person but I know how much you liked Mamma Mia and all those other movies that have grand gestures in writing so I thought hey, might as well shoot my shot on paper. 

Not gonna tell you all the details, because you deserve to hear it in-person. But mayhaps this letter has something to do with how much I like studying with you, watching movies with you, doing absolutely nothing with you and all of that in-between. 

There’s a gift card to our spot attached. Meet me at McDonalds @12 tonight, so I know it’s real 😎

Hopefully yours, Jungkook

P.S. if you haven’t noticed already, I sprayed a little cologne and stole Taehyung’s fancy paper from Muji. That’s how serious I am about you. 

“Joon, we live in a bonsai garden. We’re like giants in a forest.” 

“Can you—can you stop spitting at them? Let them breathe, dammit.” 

“Not my fault they’re so tiny! I literally have to zoom 200% just to get a good look at ‘em.” 

The two of you are huddled in what used to be Namjoon’s balcony, now a sunroom for his succulents and bonsais. Your heart feels pink and swollen with affection as you regard Namjoon with interest, absorbing every bit of information you can as he teaches you how to care for his plants. After all, you’re co-parenting now. 

Having your Wusband co-sign as your roommate for the next year is probably the best decision you have made this year. Everyday is like a breath of fresh air. With Seokjin gone for the year to tour his restaurant franchises, his room is yours for the taking. The two of you are easy going roommates, filling the apartment with color and vigour whether it be in the form of baking sweets or watching Netflix documentaries. 

The only drama you ever have is when you two are having a meltdown over the same work-related issue, as if you two somehow share the same brain cell. It’s significantly less stressful, no need for unnecessary anger when  you have someone as mediating as Namjoon.

After today’s plant lesson, you two go back to the living room to finish up your work for the evening. Another perk of living together is that you can go home at normal work times and continue where you left off with the comfort of your couch and eating a whole pizza pie with no shame. 

Namjoon’s phone pings with a new email from corporate. “We got the new concept for next month’s spread,” he gestures to you with a grandiose wave of his arm, “drumroll please.” 

He pulls up the newsletter from corporate with a flick of his thumb. Your company put out every month’s concept out in an Evite, like every month was a themed party. A stressful, month long work party. In seconds, the page loaded and you’re met with next month’s title bathed in electronic glitter. 

The Most Beautiful Moment in Life: Class of Youth

The two of you say silent, absorbing the concept like a cookie to milk. It’s a personal spread this month, a real treat for the team to show off their normal non-professional life. A spread that reveals the masters behind the ink and text. Last year’s personal spread was about the staff’s vacation destinations, but this year’s is much more intimate. You can imagine all the ideas that will be thrown around on Monday’s meeting: pinning down shared ideas like Throwback Thursdays, late night munchie runs, drunk stories, and all the crazy college nostalgia that you’ve been trying to avoid as of late. 

But now it’s presented to you in a gold chalice, and while you’re sick of the past you think it’s about time to face it. You’re excited to tackle the dark monster you’ve suppressed since Jungkook and Jisoo’s breakup. 

“Did I ever tell you I was president of my university’s Mock Trial?” 

“No, I always thought you’d be president of the Comparative Literature Club or whatever. But Mock Trial is equally as nerdy.” 

“I’ll have you know Mock Trial got me tons of action,” he winked, “made me very convincing.” 

“Gross,” you sneer, “so that’s what your spread will be about? How the co-editor of the Arts & Entertainment section managed to bag with his skills from Mock Trial?” 

“Nah, I went on a penniless journey with Jin during spring break. Six days around Malta.” 

“That does sound so you,” you sigh, fingers slipping between the cracked screen as you mull over the overly happy Evite, “sounds like a cool story.” 

“I know that look,” Namjoon quips, snatching his phone under his nose, “don’t overthink your spread just yet, it’s still the weekend. Now to more important things, what do you want from Taco Bell?”

And because you can’t refuse the combined efforts of nachos and Namjoon’s dimples, you relent for the night and tack the unmade idea to the next workday. 

Unfortunately the next workday is just as disheartening. Today’s work meeting is the antithesis of icing on the cake. While your college life isn’t anything remarkable, you didn’t think it was a painfully dull time. With every passing moment and every excited co-worker throwing memories back and forth like ping pong balls, the more you felt inferior by competing with their amazing memories. 

“Who can even afford Aruba at twenty-one,” you mutter under your breath, stalking back to your cubicle. 

Filling up a whole spread is daunting to you, the thought of Victoria popping her head in your cubicle to ask what you’ve got for the day is practically eating you from the inside out. Maybe your college life was in actuality, super boring? You have no crazy drug trips to tell, any vacations that gave you a life-changing perspective, or an epic love story. 

“What’cha got there, partner?” 

The third musketeer of your editing team’s caramel eyes peer into your cubicle, causing you to jump in your chair. Vernon wheels around, chair and all to push you into your already cramped space. His gold button up gleams in the sunlight, effectively blinding you. 

“If by something you mean nothing, then yeah I got nothing,” you frown, spinning around your chair. “What are you writing about?” 

A fond smile melts onto your friend’s face, and you can’t help returning a smile that mirrors his own. You two have fallen back into a good place, as far as you know. He’s still easy, simple, sweet Vernon. When you dropped some boxes off in coloring, you heard that Vernon and Yerin have recently started seeing each other. 

“Thought of the idea as soon as the Evite came out. It’s more of a photo spread, but I’m gonna write about my study abroad in NYU,” Vernon ticks a pencil on his forehead, “a self-identity piece talking about how I felt like, not-white around my family n’stuff. And then felt not-Asian at the same time, s’complicated but I think I can make it work.” 

“Deep,” you pat his shoulder caringly, knowing that Big Hit is a good outlet for these kinds of subjects, “alright City Slicker, since you’re so full of ideas then tell me what to write about.” 

Vernon sits up straight, regarding you with narrowed eyes, “Aren’t you gonna write about your little love triangle with Jisoo and Jungkook?” and it seems like he’s already storyboarded the idea in his head, gesturing to the air as if he’s writing down a timeline, “I can see the headline now: How to Steal a Heart,” he’s grinning, nodding fervently as you cross your arms in distaste. 

“Vern, are you suggesting that I exploit Jisoo and Jungkook’s personal lives?” while the journalism business didn’t pride itself on sincerity, it did feel wrong to drag in your personal life to that extent. 

“Babe, you don’t understand. You have the perfect slice of life story. Everyone’s writing about expensive vacations and that one time they got cross-faded and ended up in Busan,” he squeezes your hand, “but your story, it’s relatable. It’s romantic. It’s angsty. It has closure. No one’s gonna be able to relate to an impulse spending on daddy’s money to Aruba. But first loves? Unrequited romance and all that ish? Everyone can speak to that. And you’re a beautiful writer, they’ll eat up that story like honey.” 

“I don’t know, it still doesn’t feel right.” 

“Change up the names, twist the story,” he offers easily, knowing you’d put up a fight, “besides, it’s not like you’re planning on talking to Jisoo or Jungkook ever again,” you open your mouth to retort, but Vernon’s phone beeps to the Star Wars theme song and he’s flying out of his chair. “Shoot, gotta go help Joon upstairs. Just think about it, okay? Good luck!” and he’s kicking his chair out with a brown loafer, leaving you with breathing room in your cubicle. 

Five seconds later Vernon is jogging back, pointing a finger at you, “And if you do choose to write it, you have to add that Jisoo copped your McDonalds gift card. Like, who does that shit? Couldn’t she have just given it to you and say it was from her and not Jungkook? Seriously fucked up.” 

For the next ten or so minutes you mull. Out of all the memorable college events you’ve participated in, the largest one by far is your (now defunct and debatable) friendship with Jisoo, and your (un)requited love for Jungkook. Reluctantly, you must admit Vernon has a sharp idea, busting in like a hero and offering you the most writable piece on a silver platter. 

It doesn’t feel morally right just to start writing, because ultimately you can’t feel comfortable until you get the consent of Jungkook. While you don’t want to touch Jisoo with a ten-meter pole, you do want to start talking to Jungkook again now that the waters have calmed.

Your life has moved gracefully up until this point, and you’d like to start being friends with him again. Decision made, you pull out your phone and make an important call.

“Hey Yoongi,” you say nervously. Min Yoongi is Kim Namjoon’s equivalent, Jungkook’s Wusband and former upperclassmen in college. 

Said man hums noncommittally on the other line, “Whaddya want, it’s been awhile.” 

You stifle a giggle at his apathetic attitude, knowing he’s someone who wastes no time in getting straight to the point. “I just wanna make sure Jungkook’s address is still the same? I know it’s been a couple months, but I need to send him something and I wanna make sure it gets to him ASAP because—”

“Because last time something was sent, your crazy roommate intervened and Jungkook ended up in a two-year half-toxic relationship? Yeah, let’s make sure that doesn’t happen again.”

“Yoongi,” you say slowly, “where are you?” 

“Working in the studio,” he tuts, “Jungkook says hi, by the way.” 

Typical, cat’s out of the bag. With a roll of our eyes you reply, “Thanks for outing me, Yoongi. Talk to you later.” 

“And y/n? Jungkook says he’s waiting.” 

With a stupid smile slapped onto your face, you hang up the phone and pull out your stationary kit from under your desk. You pluck out a vermillion red envelope, a color so bold and begging to be seen, you know it can’t possibly get lost in transit. Feeling a little bit like a high schooler as you pull out a glitter jelly pen, you get to writing. 

Hey Pretty Boy...

Jungkook and Jisoo are no longer together, evidently. 

Their social media runs in different directions, with Jisoo sporting absolute elegance in her work at her family-owned boutique. Her posts are full of shiny outfits and soulless gazes, betraying any pinch of emotion she may have felt over these past few months. Her profile is wiped of any personal posts, all traces of you and Jungkook evaporated from her page. You must admit that she looks good, like a real fashion mogul, but only at the surface level. 

Conversely, Jungkook is thriving. It’s evident. Normally he isn’t the type of guy to post so frequently, his habits being often sporadic and limited to sweaty gym stories. But whenever you scroll, it’s pictures of him smiling. Big bunny teeth broken into a genuine, full-bellied laugh. Cute selfies of him and his co-workers. You notice two familiar co-workers in those posts, Irene and Seulgi, two beautiful women Jisoo always felt intimidated by whenever she ranted to you. You conclude positively that Jungkook doesn’t feel tethered and can hang out with all the friends he wants, female and male alike. Jungkook looks free, and you’re happy for him. 

It’s another Instagram-worthy moment tonight at McDonalds, where you and Jungkook proposed to meet each other at 12AM. 

This time, the letter makes it to its desired destination. You make sure of that because this time you hand-deliver it, slipping under his apartment door knowing he lives alone and no one would be able to access it except him. 

You’re parked in an obscure corner, but you can see that Jungkook is currently having a great time with his co-workers for an after work meal. Yoongi is unbothered on his phone, while Jimin and Seulgi are taking turns throwing fries into each other’s mouth. Jungkook is squished between them, scrunching his nose cutely as he tries not to get in the fray of their fry-war. 

Your phone pings, and you laugh at what pops up on the screen.

Yoongi: come inside, u loser. 

You: can’t ur friend group makes me nervous stop being so dang cute

You: dw i’ll wait, it’s only 11:50

Instead of replying, Yoongi puts his phone down and resumes eating. In turn you pick a playlist, deciding that “summer time high mix✨✨✨” is a theme you need to subscribe to for the rest of the weekend. 

Busying yourself by sending some texts to Namjoon and checking some emails, you relax in your seat as you let your brain turn to sludge for the weekend. You’re tired, eyes glazing over as you watch Yoongi elbow Jungkook harshly, forcing him to look out the foggy window. 

Jungkook’s eyes light up like it’s Christmas Eve, but instead of Christmas lights it's your car’s lowlights. The graphic designer  pays no mind to his friends as they wish him goodbye and goodluck, throwing on his jacket with a wave. 

The night air whizzes by, Jungkook’s floppy black strands bouncing with each step as he bounds to your car. He throws your door open, bringing in the cold air as he regards you as easily as an old friend would. 

“Hi,” he chirps, placing his tattooed palms by the air vent, “c’mon, let’s order.” 

“You know, you could’ve ordered inside and brought it in here.” 

“Yeah but then it would take longer to get to you,” the cheeky grin that Jungkook throws at you is unmistakable, “c’mon, get out the car and let’s switch.” 

“Huh?” 

“You look tired, you didn’t come back from the office again, did you?” 

“I did tonight,” you say, “I just really wanted to get the soft copy of the article done and—” 

“Out, out!” Jungkook clicks your seatbelt off and he’s coming out of the passenger side, opening your car and pulling you out by the hand, “c’mon, I’ll drive.” 

You shake your head, hiding your smile in your hand as you let Jungkook do what he wants. Normally you’d be insulted that anyone suggests they should drive your car but Jungkook would always drive you around, saying he loved long rides. Above all, if you could trust anyone to drive your car, Jungkook is at the top of the list. 

Buckling in, you bite the inside of your cheek as Jungkook easily pulls out of the parking spot one-handed. His jacket is pulled up to his elbows, exposing his veins as he expertly whirls the wheel in the direction of the drive-thru. Since college he’s always looked very attractive driving.  

Doesn’t mean you have to act like you’re still in college. You tamp those feelings down, knowing that your article probably has you feeling stuck in time. 

“—coming along?” 

“Wha?” 

“I said, how’s the spread coming along?” 

“It’s pretty much done, I think. I’ll send you the hard copy when it’s ready,” you tap your fingers against the dashboard, “but are you sure you’re okay with me writing it? I know I’m using a pseudonym and everything for you two but I still feel weird—” 

“It’s fine, I think it’s a good thing,” and you still squirm in your seat when he flashes you a genuine smile, “I mean, it kinda is a funny story and I think it’s good for both of us. Like closure, y’know? Moving on and—hi, can I get two Oreo McFlurrys and a large fry? Thanks!” he pulls out his wallet to scan the total on the e-reader.  “I mean, didn’t it feel good writing it?”

“Yeah,” you replied honestly, relaxing in your seat, “like, college was fun and all, but when Jisoo kinda ruined all that… after awhile I didn’t think it was ruined after all, y’know? I still made amazing friends and ended up where I wanted to be. I want to show the readers that shit happens, and that’s okay. And if things are really meant to be, they’re meant to be.” 

The summer playlist hums in the background as Jungkook pulls up to the pick-up window. He thanks the worker and hands you the tray, and you make quick work to put the fries in the first cup holder for optimal sharing. He doesn’t park at McDonalds, but instead smoothly pulls out of the restaurant into the direction of his apartment. It isn’t a particularly long drive, but you figure it would be easier for Jungkook to go home first if you’re already parked at his complex. 

“What do you mean by that?” Jungkook parks in the driveway of his apartment, taking his McFlurry from your hands. 

“Mean by what?” 

“If things are really meant to be, they’re meant to be.” 

“Well, we’re here now, right?” 

Jungkook pops his spoon in, swallowing vanilla and a silly smile through his coral pink lips, “We’re here now,” he repeats. 

The night air is cool and your conversation is warm. You promise Jungkook that you’ll send him the final copy of your spread as soon as it’s done, and you two eagerly deviate away from the past and focus on the present. 

You can’t help the eagerness that flows between you, as if you’ve never spent time apart like this and it’s only now that you’re reuniting. It must be absence that makes the heart grow fonder, because you swell with affection and you find Jungkook’s presence sweeter than any kind of ice cream. 

Are you dating now? Maybe. You and Jungkook are going on dates, everything without the title. McFlurry runs, marathons of HGTV’s Design on a Dime, having lunch at each other’s respective buildings with the Wusbands. Whether these dates are exclusive or not is unknown, but you figure the question will present yourself one way or another. 

You’re in a good place right now, potential relationship or not. After all, your priorities are simultaneously positive and in order: family, work, friends, and any potential romantic trysts are at the very bottom. You could kiss the cover of this month’s issue (and trust, you have kissed your own copy multiple times) if it is not for the fact that this specific issue is for Jungkook. 

So, romantic trysts and friends have a tendency to flip-flop on your priority list, but only because it’s Jungkook. 

Unsurprisingly, there’s no guilt knowing that you’re dating your former best friend's ex-boyfriend. 

After a much deserved early work day, Namjoon and the crew arrange a hearty happy-hour filled with good food and enough relaxation to last the weekend. With your combined successes, your team felt like they made the best issue yet. At the heart of it, The Most Beautiful Moment in Life: Class of Youth became a reckoning of each other’s young life. Despite the love and the growth that occurred from your college years up until this point, you’re glad to close that chapter and move forward. 

You did not tell Jungkook when the issue would come out, so you think it’ll be a fun surprise for him when he sees it magically show up at his apartment. Bending down you move to slip the issue under his door, one hand pushing it under while one hand braces against the frame to steady your balance. 

Just as the shiny cover glides under the door it swings open, and you fall flat on Jungkook’s feet. 

Being the little shit he is, he simply giggles at the blunder, looking at you with excited eyes. “I’ve been waiting for you,” he says. 

“Creepy as hell, Jeon,” you mutter under your breath, brushing the dirt off your aqua pencil skirt. Looking at him from your spot on the floor and his large height, you grimace. “You look like a middle-aged serial killer looking outside your peephole.” 

“Now, we know that’s not true.” he finally offers his hand, easily pulling you up to your feet. You follow him into his kitchen, where he’s cutting up fresh fruit. He throws your issue on the counter, gentle enough so it doesn’t slide off the granite. He gestures to himself with both hands, “me, a dashingly handsome late twenty-something in Nike sweats who can bench-press two of you? Totally not a middle-aged serial killer.” 

“It’s in the eyes,” you chastise, “you look crazy.” 

“Maybe I’m just crazy excited to see you,” he says with a cheeky grin. 

You try your best not to choke on your spit at the cheeseball comment, throwing a blackberry in your mouth. Savoring the burst of tart flavor that fills your mouth, you wait for Jungkook to plate the fruit before meeting him on the couch. He’s holding a prettily arranged plate of berries, bananas, and mango with a huge dollop of whipped cream in the middle. In his other hand is Big Hit’s magazine. 

Throwing your blazer on the couch’s arm you don’t hesitate to cuddle up next to him, eagerly waiting for him to read your spread. 

The cover gazes back at the two of you like a reflection. The entirety of the staff is posed on the cover, made to look like a class photo. Some of you are holding balloons in your respective school colors, many of you grouping up with whoever happened to go to college together. You and Vernon are wearing matching university sweaters with silly grins on your faces. In the middle of the issue is the editor-in-chief, Victoria Song holding a placard that reads: Class of Youth. 

Jungkook spares you a glance from the corner of his eye, your head naturally tucked into his shoulder. With an exaggerated sigh, he fiddles through the glossy pages, “Hmm, which one should I read first?” 

“Of course you’ll read mine first,” you pout. 

“Ah, Namjoon’s looks really fun. Or Vernon’s? New York looks pretty cool,” he flips to a random page, “wait, Yerin’s spread is a Korean cookbook! I definitely want to make some tuna rice...”  

“Jungkook,” you whine, “read mine.” 

“I don’t know,” he taps his finger on his lip, “I mean, I pretty much know your spread because I’m already in it. It would be kind of redundant to read it.” 

“Kook, you’re being mean,” you glower, rubbing your cheek against his soft sweater. He’s just so damn comfy. 

“I’m kidding,” he tugs at your cheek, “where’s the table of contents, first page?”

“I’m on page eighty-three.” 

You speed up the process like an impatient child, leaning over to brush the pages to the desired spread. You even dog-earred it, a habit that drives Jungkook crazy as he immediately fiddles to iron out the crease. 

“Are you gonna read it to me too, mom?” he teases. 

“Okay fine! I’ll be quiet, but don’t take too long.” 

“Yes ma’am.” 

Eyes fluttering, you let Jungkook take his time to absorb your piece. A roommate by any other (rude) name: the lost letter. A cheesy, gimmicky title that Victoria insisted upon that you had no choice but relent to. The rest of the spread thankfully has a very authentic edge to it, your story laced with photos of you and Jungkook, your internship with Vernon, and most importantly, a scan of the lavender letter that got left in the past. 

Jungkook’s not silent through his read-through, either. He laughs at all the right parts, fueling your ego as his smile grows at your favorite lines. While he doesn’t directly engage in conversation, his positive energy is enough for you to make you feel like you’ve done your job right. It’s one thing to write about unknown celebrities and unnamed artists, but for people like Jungkook, the validation is personal. 

“It’s beautiful,” Jungkook says when he’s read it thrice through, running his thumb over a picture of you. “Really organic. Really, real.”

“Really?”

“Really,” he chuckles, having run out of adverbs. “It’s funny, too. I liked your little internal monologue. I wish I knew how you felt back then.” 

“I wish you did, too.” 

You’re quietly munching on a strawberry, looking over a polaroid Jungkook took. It was  sometime in the beginning of senior year, where you’ve fallen asleep on his mattress, drool drying on your mouth. Normally you’d be opposed to having such unflattering, grainy pictures amongst your writing, but it encapsulates the youth you’ve tried so hard to chase away. 

“How do you feel?” Jungkook says, switching out the magazine for the plate of fruit, placing it on his side. 

“Feel great, actually,” you muse, smiling to yourself. By no means are you a hero writing some grand gesture in an entertainment magazine, but you feel like you’ve saved yourself. You’ve savored your youth in four thousand words, cutting out the poison and keeping the moment as sweet as it can be. 

“I’m proud of you,” he reaches to ruffle your hair, and you don’t even get mad when it tousles out of your pinned style. 

Reveling in the attention, you simply close your eyes and feed yourself a handful of blueberries. 

“Love that I make money, but I definitely miss college from time to time,” Jungkook stretches, jostling you out of your comfortable position. “Like I remember Taehyung and I would take turns bringing backpacks to the dining hall so we could stuff fruit in it for later.”

“Yeah, but as much as I loved college I wouldn’t go back,” you nod to yourself, “I’m happy where I am now.” 

“What about when we stayed up for midnight breakfast? The dining hall was filled to the brim with food. Remember when I tried to eat a whole stack of pancakes?” 

“Jungkook…” 

“Or when our classes got cancelled and we went to Lotte World? You ate way too much funnel cake and I had to carry you to the car!” 

“Jungkook—” 

“And that one time we snuck out to the music hall’s rooftop?” words gush out of Jungkook’s mouth like a waterfall, unable to relent, “that’s when I realized I liked you. I liked you so much, I tried to tell you that night but choked—”

“Jungkook!” and he immediately zips up, frowning. You straighten up, on your knees as you reach over to run your hands through his onyx tresses, moving the styled strands to the back of his pierced ears, “Jungkook,” you repeat softly, “I’ve heard all these stories, I was there for most of them. As much as I love the past… can we talk about something else?” you give him a small, tentative smile to show him you’re not mad, but a little uncomfortable at his reminiscing. 

He leans into your touch, pressing your palm against the soft swell of his warm cheek. “Okay,” he agrees, resting one hand on your thigh. 

You’re roped in his gaze, and you have to force yourself to breathe when Jungkook moves closer to you. He hooks a leg behind his back, and another across his lap. A cool breeze kisses your inner thighs when your skirt exposes your cotton underwear. You should be embarrassed but instead you’re fixated, unable to understand what he’s trying to accomplish. 

“Then I’m gonna talk about the future,” Jungkook traps you between the couch, his thumb running hot circles to where your skirt has hiked up. It exposes a slip of the thigh that Jungkook has seen a million times. He’s seen you walking around your apartment in a large shirt, ridden up to your boyshorts. It’s different now, you feel exposed and tingly, thrumming with excitement. “I like you, obviously anticipated news and old news. I can’t stop thinking about how much I want to go on dates with you, re-watch Avatar, grumble when I force you to come to the gym with me,” he bumps noses with you when you scrunch yours, “I wanna be with you. Heck, I’ve even cleared space in my spare room so you’d have closet space for all your fancy designer suits if you ever need it.”

“You cleared space?” you manage to choke out. Visions of a shared apartment roll through your brain. Cooking meals together, having two toothbrushes side by side, and waking up to his face. 

“Of course I did. Do you know how financially attractive you are?” he says lightheartedly, “you’re a sexy working woman and it’s crazy to imagine you’d want to settle for me and my little apartment. But I have to try now because if I don’t, it’ll be too late.” 

“That’s not true,” you retort, “you’re not someone I’d settle for. I want you, and no one else.” 

He chuckles, running a thumb over your cheek. “Then what are we waiting for? Your key’s hiding under the mat.” 

“Jungkook…” on the tip of your tongue lays the words you’re going too fast but it doesn’t make its way to the air. 

“But do you really think it’s too fast?” he reads your face clearly, “these feelings never went anywhere. They were locked away, sure. And I loved her,” he can’t even say the name, not when you’re warm and flush against him, “but I loved our friendship more.”

“I… I don’t know what to say,” you breathe, letting the cogs in your brain roll until sparks develop. 

“You don’t have to say anything,” he concedes, “I just wanted to let you know. Could’ve done the letter thing all over again and let the past repeat itself. I know Namjoon wouldn’t hide a love letter for two years, but if I left another damn letter he’d definitely make a copy and tease me about it.” 

You snort, pressing your forehead to his. You’re practically buried in the couch now, tingly and vibrating with happiness. “And I’m not going to leave you hanging. I do want to say something,” and he looks at you expectantly, licking the leftover berry juice on his lips, nearly making you miss your train of thought, “I like you too,” you say, the other L-word is also applicable, but you feel like that phrase is reserved for another time, “I want to show you off on work vacations, bring you along as my date and show them you’re my muse,” you confess, “I wanna play video games with you ‘till 2AM, and eat ice cream in the comfort of our apartment instead of our cars because we’re too stubborn to admit we don’t wanna go home without each other.” 

Jungkook absolutely preens at the affection, sending you a heart melting smile that has your stomach doing backflips.

“Jungkook, I want to fall in love with you again.” 

Your squeal of surprise is swallowed by Jungkook’s lips, tasting of mangoes and berries as strong hands cup your backside, easily lifting you onto his lap. You plop under his strong thighs, feeling them flex against yours. The both of you are pouring in this kiss, raining with promises and hopes for a future with each other. His taste is concentrated, and you can feel the devotion practically injected in his embrace. 

When he pulls away his lips are cherry-red and shiny, looking up at you through clear coffee eyes. “This isn’t a dream, right?” he looks at you up and down, unable to decipher fact from fiction, “because I distinctly remember two wet dreams that involve you looking like this.” 

Looking down, you heat at the disarray you’re in. Hair wild and parted in different wavelengths, tired of the day’s efforts. Your slightly sheer dress-shirt is rumpled, the lace collar opened with two popped buttons revealing your cleavage, and your skirt is stretched so tight that it’s ruched all the way up your thighs. Sprawled across Jungkook’s lap, you’re dangerously close to something long and hard. 

Emboldened, you clutch at Jungkook’s collar, pulling him closer. 

“Show me what happens in your dream,” you whisper into his ear, barely brushing your clothed core against his crotch, “maybe we can make it come true tonight.” 

You can’t see his face, but you feel something dark and sensual overtake him. The grip on your ass tightens, a delicious pain that has you pressing your breasts against him and nipping on his ear, your tongue darting sensually through the cold silver hoops that dart through his skin. 

Within seconds, he rips you away from his neck and demands, “Open.” 

Dazed, you barely get a centimeter of your mouth open when Jungkook presses something cold and sugary against your lips. Whipped cream. You manage to take a small bite of the tart strawberry that he holds by the viridian stem, rolling the flavor between your mouth as Jungkook paints the leftover whipped cream over your lips. Once he’s satisfied he then creates a white trail that leads to your cleavage. 

Better than any dream, his eyes drink you in like the last glass of water in a desert. Your lips are swollen and parted like a baby kitten, covered in the creamy confection. “So pretty,” he exhales, his hot tongue licking from your cleavage to your lips, swallowing the flavor of you and strawberry juice, “such a pretty girl you are, and all mine.” 

“Yours,” you submit easily, rolling your hips against his. 

At that moment you think you’re meant to fall in love this way. You can’t imagine the shy, fumbly Jungkook and your equally confused self waltzing around a relationship when you barely had your lives together. The two of you still had growing to do. The wait is certainly worth it, because as you feel his arms tighten around you, you’re sure this love will stay strong.

It’s difficult for you to find a rhythm at first, what with Jungkook’s strength and need to be satiated, both of you are sloppy but the friction is nothing less than delicious. Your finger reaches over to swipe at the leftover cream on the plate, and you press your finger to Jungkook’s mouth, and he immediately complies. A dollop of sweet cream leaks out of his lips and your panties dampen further when you feel his tongue lick you clean, imagaining how good it would feel if it was your pussy he was licking. 

Your mouth waters at the feeling of his dick lining up against your core, as sticky as the strawberry juice that clings to your bodies. 

“C-can I make a confession? I—oh, Jungkook…” your mind is all fuzzed up when he snaps his hips against yours, causing you to shamelessly bounce on his length. 

“Yeah?” 

“I… I like it when you use all your strength like that,” his hips slow as your words sink in, but you don’t mind as it gives you time to make a long drag along the entirety of his member. “Everytime you pull me up when I trip, or you come back from a workout, I like it when you carry me around like I weigh nothing.” 

“Do—do you think about it a lot?” he grunts, and you stifle a moan when he does a slow, hard drag against your wet folds. “Tell the truth.” 

“It’s, it’s embarrassing,” you whimper, unable to think straight with the amount of stimuli you’re receiving.  

“Please, baby.” 

“Yes mm—oh! I do,” you try to get the words out as quickly as you can. He stops moving, and you groan in frustration so you just lay it all out on the table. “I, I love it when you hold me in your strong arms. And, ah, uh w-henever you come back from the gym you just look so sexy fresh from the shower. Sometimes I think about how you’re too damn nice for your own good but I bet you’d be so rough in bed.” 

“Really?” and then he’s shoving you onto the couch, air brushing against your bare thighs as your back hits the beige throw pillows. He’s hovering, dark eyes starting from the tip of your toes to your damp lips. “You like it when I manhandle you? Throw you around like a little doll?” 

“All that strength, and for what?” you try to keep your snappy remarks in check, but it’s hard when he’s pressing his straining dick against your thigh, weeping and needy. 

“You’re not gonna be joking about my strength anytime soon, baby,” emblazoned, he easily throws your leg over his shoulder, pushing your panties to the side to let your wetness leak out and onto his fingers, “are you gonna complain or be a good girl?” 

“Yes, I’m ah—” you wince when he inserts a finger, “I’ll be good for you,” 

“My good girl,” he revels in the way you melt under his touch, your previous sarcasm quickly dissolving into a puddle. You always had an inkling that Jungkook would be a sneaky fox in bed, all that muscle hidden behind a kind smile and a penchant for tea with milk and honey. 

Jungkook slips in another finger, stretching you and preparing you for what’s to come. He’s scissoring you at a sensible pace that has you squirming and wanting more. To prevent you from shimmying off the couch he holds you down with his free hand, and you love the way he practically feeds you to the couch, hands dancing over your neck as he shoves you further into the furniture. 

“You look so gorgeous,” he says, causing you to moan and keen at his attention, “you’re such a strong, gorgeous woman. Having you sprawled out like this, ready to do whatever I want to you is so fucking hot.” 

“I’m—I’m only weak for you Jungkook,” you say honestly, tears pricking when he dips another finger. The stretch burns deliciously, and your folds eagerly swallow him up until you’re filled to the brim. Your fingers or toys cannot compare to flesh, and you sigh in relief when you see his inked fingers pick up the pace once more. 

“You’re damn right,” Jungkook husks, and with a grain of love he murmurs in your ear, “I’m only weak for you, too.” 

And that’s when he snaps, thumb rolling against your bud as he slams his other fingers against you, going at a brutal pace. You cry out, not caring whether his neighbors hear as he pulls you back and forth through pleasure and pain. 

“T-too much, Kookie,” you mewl, your hand warbling to find his, “I, ah, ‘m gonna cum!” 

“That’s the plan,” he only goes faster, stretching your band further and further before your desired high is reached. His hand trails up to force your chin straight, looking up at him, “let go for me, baby. Wanna feel your pussy clench around my fingers.” 

In seconds, you gush. It has you in a slight panic, drunk on endorphins as you try to lift your head up but Jungkook’s hand is firmly pressing you on your shoulder as he fingers you efficiently through your high, the wet squelching sounds only increasing with your cries. His lap is drenched in your arousal, along with his chin and lips glistening with your essence. 

He finally releases you when you’re practically shaking, his hands sticky and creamy. You moan when he shamelessly licks them within your view, making sure to wrap his tongue around his ink-stained digits. 

“I,” your mouth is dry when you feel the dampness that hits your bottom, “I’ve never, I don’t remember ever—” 

Your babbles are lost between your throat and Jungkook’s tongue, shoved deep into your mouth. Tasting your arousal has you practically vibrating in your place, as you two rut against each other like hungry bunnies. 

“God, you’re amazing,” he says between pecks, kissing away your face of any tears you may have pricked, “Amazing, adorable, absolutely beautifulIadoreyousoso—” 

“Pleasepleaseplease,” you press your hips up, wiggling for more attention, “please fuck me, Jungkook.” 

You can’t help the witchy, satisfied smile when Jungkook’s eyes darken to a thick coal, “Anything for you,” he murmurs, swinging your legs between his arms as he lifts you like a feather. 

On his lap again, you soon accept that the way you two mesh like puzzle pieces is one of your favorite positions as it gives you both equal space to ravish each other. 

Just when your hand trails to the waistband of his boxer briefs and you’re rolling your thumb over its collected moisture, the moment is shattered when the doorbell rings. You jump in his arms, unprepared for your moment to be interrupted. 

He groans into the crown of your hair, and you soften in his relaxed hold, “I ordered us pizza,” he nearly forgot. 

Perking your head up to look at him you regard him innocently, as if you didn’t release a waterfall on his sweats two seconds ago. “You got us pizza?” 

“I knew you’d be coming over tonight,” he’s pouting into your neck, regretting ever having called the pizza guy if he knew this would happen, “Victoria posted the publish date on Twitter. I just didn’t think,” he gestures vaguely to the mess on his pants, “this would happen.”  

“Damn, and here I thought I was being sneaky,” you chuckle, flicking his ear playfully. 

He gives you an uncharacteristically subby whine, shamelessly upset he has to let you go so fast after he’s given you your first of many highs. Before he weakens further under your beauty, he unceremoniously shoves you off. “Sorry, pretty girl,” you melt at the easy way his pet name rolls off his lips, “can you wait in my room for a bit so I can pay the delivery guy? I don’t want them to see you like this.” 

“But I want to eat pizza,” you declare stubbornly, standing up to button your blouse and pull down your skirt. 

Before you could fasten one button or pull down one centimeter, his hand darts out to snatch your wrist away from your body. It doesn’t hurt much, but it causes your body to heat in more places than one. He’s sexy like this, demanding your attention. “No,” he rumbles definitively, “my room. Now.” 

“Why?” you throw your hands in the air, yelping when he slaps your ass. He makes sure to make it sting, cupping you fully. 

“Because,” he says firmly, “you don’t get to eat until I eat,” you whimper when his hand reaches to cup your sex, panties wet and cold without his warmth as he pushes you in the direction of his bedroom. 

Oh, you can’t wait for both of you to eat tonight. 

some time later.

“Ohmygod the view is beautiful!” Krystal, who works in advertisement, squeals. “No filter needed!” 

“Alright alright, make room Princess,” Namjoon teases. With a bump to Krystal’s tiny hips Namjoon shoves you two across the pavilion, putting his arm around you once he finds the perfect angle, “Umji, can you get a pic of me and my Work Wife? I want this on the Big Hit Instagram!” 

You hold your straw sunhat down from the salty wind, smiling beautifully as Umji takes multiple pictures of you and Namjoon from her Nikon. Another successful year under your notch, ending with a successful work retreat. 

“Namjoon, can I take a picture with my actual wife now?” 

“We’re not married, Jungkook,” you chastise, patting the chest of Namjoon’s floral printed Hawaiian shirt so he can switch. Instantly, Jungkook slides up next to you like a picture perfect stock model piece, and you wrap your arms around his trim waist, “we’re not even engaged.”

“You say that like it’s a bad thing,” he pouts, looking over the pavilion and adjusting the both of you so there’s a good amount of you and the resort in the background. The sun may be scathingly hot, but it looks beautiful perched over the crystal clear waters. “Namjoon, you got it easy,” Jungkook says when he hands him your phone, “every angle is our good angle, so you can’t mess it up.” 

Being the honest man he is, Namjoon knows better and doesn’t say anything to that. Instead he shoots down whatever pineapple-flavored concoction is offered to him on a silver platter, and starts shooting. 

“Is this swimsuit new?” Jungkook murmurs into your ear between shots, flicking your little red number by the strap connecting the back, “because I didn’t see this in the luggage.” 

You smile big, pearly whites as Namjoon demands to pop out your butt and work it, pressing your body closer to Jungkook’s. “Tiny enough so I could hide it in my purse,” you reply proudly, voice low for only each other’s ears, “why, surprised?” 

“Definitely not prepared,” his fingers dig deliciously in your bare flesh, “would Victoria fire you if she catches us doing it in the cabana?” 

Amused that your boyfriend now shares your combined awe and fear of your boss, you twist his nipple lightly. He yelps, and from Namjoon’s guaff he’s definitely got that on camera. “We didn’t come to Boracay to fuck in the cabana.” 

“Then the hotel room?” 

Namjoon hands you back your phone when he considers his job done, letting you and Jungkook have some alone time. You wave your phone in his face, trying to get him to focus on the task at hand. You wanted to post some cute pictures of you and your boyfriend, one to impress the family back home and the Big Hit interns back in Seoul who are absolutely pining for your position. 

“Jungkook, they have the water ski thing where you can flip in the water mid air! Doesn’t that sound fun? Or we can go scuba diving, have Filipino food, or get massages. LIterally, we’re on Big Hit’s dime, and the first thing you want to do is go back to the room?” 

“Yes,” he pouts petulantly, leaning into the hollow of your ear and whispering, “got a chub on.” 

Discreetly so, your hands brush against his navy trunks and you note yes, he’s half hard. “No!” you shake your head definitively, pushing him out of your arms. You’re not letting sex get in the way of your hard-earned vacation, you’re on company dime and you intend to milk every peso of it. “Namjoon, take him away!” 

You blow him a kiss and follow another group who’s decided to go eat, watching your boyfriend get dragged away by Namjoon’s long arms. Krystal, who’s been mildly watching the whole ordeal in-between taking selfies, looks at you in awe, “You got it good, bosslady,” she says, and you happily link arms with her in the direction of the restaurants. 

You and Jungkook definitely have it good. You don’t see him until dinnertime, looking utterly relaxed as he sips on a mango-muddled concoction. He must’ve gotten a couples massage with Namjoon, cute. Splitting up was definitely a good idea, by the time your meal arrives the two of you are practically leaning against each other, telling each other what events you need to do tomorrow and events you think will be fun to do together. 

“Joon,” Jungkook is throwing an arm over your Wusband’s shoulder, mildly tipsy. The image is adorable, as Jungkook long ago previously confessed that he felt a little jealous of Namjoon’s work relationship with you before you were dating. Now, it feels like they’re best friends and you’re third-wheeling. “What do you think about having halo-halo tomorrow? It’s like bingsu but with a bunch of other good stuffs. There’s red bean, mango, ube, ice cream…” 

Just as Jungkook begins his tirade of dessert ingredients, you pull up your phone to check on your social media. You smile back at your profile, seeing your latest Instagram post at the very top of the feed. Not to flex, but the two of you look pretty smokin’ since you’ve been keeping up with Jungkook’s insistence to join him at the gym. Jungkook and you are leaning against the pristine veranda, overlooking the clear blue water and a cloudless sky. The smiles you two sport are genuine and utterly in love. 

You scroll down the comments, most of them filled with sweet messages but one of them has you doing a double take. 

@sooyaaa__: 😒😒😒 knew something was goin on behind my back… good riddance

The smell of Jungkook’s detergent overtakes your nostrils, and you turn to him. He’s stopped talking, now immersed in whatever’s going on in your phone. 

“The nerve of her,” Jungkook scrunches his nose, disgusted at her latest comment. “As if anyone would believe her.” 

“Yeah,” you echo, “I feel bad for her, though. She’s probably lonely.” 

“Her loss, she put this upon herself. Not us.” 

You pout, “I know, but she was my friend at one point.” 

He frowns, putting an arm behind your backrest. It would be easy for him to say yeah, and she was my girlfriend and one-up you, leaving it at that. But now he knows better, and that friendship is a much better value than an ill-fated relationship. “Sorry baby,” it’s not his fault, but he sees your disappointment in putting out hope for an old friend. He gives you a little smooch on your temple, “do you miss her?” 

“The old her, yeah,” you sigh, clicking on her profile, “but now? I can do without her negativity.” 

“Okay,” he takes your phone from your hand, “have you ever blocked a person before?”

“No.”

“Well, today’s the day,” he says it so coolly, you barely have time to think when he clicks the ‘block’ button on Jisoo’s profile, then clicking off his phone to put in his pocket. “No more phone for today,” he proceeds to take your plate that was recently served, taking the time to cut your large vegetables into smaller portions. “Like you said, we shouldn’t waste your vacation time.” 

Your heart swells with butterflies for Jeon Jungkook, who’s meticulously cutting your food and telling you to relax and stop dwelling on the past. He’s right, if Jisoo’s not going to stick around for the future and continue to cause negativity in your life, why not keep the positives in the past while it lasted? 

“You know I love you, right?” 

He ceases cutting, and looks at you to pop a sweet potato in his mouth. “Love me enough to do it in the cabana?” 

He’s still on that? “Jungkook,” you warn, pretending to get up, “forget I said anything. I’m gonna go karaoke with Umji.” 

“Kiddingggg,” he whines, pulling you back down with an outstretched hand, “you know I love you too.” 

“You’re terrible.” 

“Only this way because I’d know you’d totally be into cabana sex if we were vacationing by ourselves.” 

“Yes, but you’re still terrible,” you giggle when Jungkook steals a kiss, just as easy as he’s stolen your heart.  

[junisfics]

PLEASE OH PLEASE OH PLEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAASEEEEEE DO A COMPLETE A-Z NSFW ALPHABET OF ARMIN!!!!!!!!!!!! EVERYONE ALWAYS JUST DOES SOME LETTERS!!!!!! WE NEEEEEEEEEEEED ALLLLLLLL OF IT!!!!!!! PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

🤝deal

warnings: smut / nsfw 18 + ( somnophilia, breeding, dubcon / dumbification / overstimulation

a // aftercare ( what they're like after sex )

he gets very very clingy, very affectionate. really likes to show how much he loves you afterwards. clean up is a more mutual thing, you both help each other wipe off spit, cum, lube, etc afterwards. you both also like to take a nice warm bath after

b // body part ( their favorite body part, on them and you )

his: his arms. mainly because he can hold you in them and likes to squeeze you real tight. he may not be the strongest but he's very proud of how strong he is

yours: tits. armin is a tits guy sorry. big or small he loves your tits so much, loves the way they look in his hands or covered in hickies. just loves 'em.

c // cum ( anything to do with cum )

his favorite place to cum is on your face. yes. it sounds a little lewd for him but he looooves to see your pretty face all red and painted in his cum hehe

armin cums a lot. like a lot. i don't make the rules. his dick is just so sensitive he can't help it. when he cums in your mouth it's always a full swallow or two.

d // dirty secret

y'all already know this. armin is a closet perv and no one can change my mind. he's a fucking pervert. panty snatcher, watches you shower, gets off to you sleeping. everything.

e // experience

armins not experienced but he's very smart so he knows what's up. and he's a quick learner. it's very easy for him to get you off once he knows what you like.

f // favorite position

missionary is always a classic, he loves seeing your face as he's making you feel good. it boosts his ego a little

but doggy WHEW armin goes fucking insane for doggy. he loves hitting it from behind to see the way your ass ripples as his hips meet yours.

g // goofy ( are they more serious or humorous in the moment )

if something funny happens he laughs, but he doesn't just mess around the whole time. sex is an intimate thing for him and he likes to keep it more serious... but it's always light hearted

h // hair ( how well groomed are they )

clean but not bald cuz he thinks it makes his dick look weird LMFAO

i // intimacy ( how intimate are they in the moment )

he's an intimate guy, he loves loving you. he loves being close to you, he loves pleasing you. when it's about you it's about you all the way though. he wants to make you feel happy and content.

j // jerk off

he's a closet perv so of course he jerks off... what can you expect? obviously he always prefers it was you but if you're not there and he needs to get off, he needs to get off.

k // kink ( one or more of their kinks )

whew this is a list isn't it.

overstimulation: whether he's receiving or giving he loves it. he loves when he can barely control his body from twitching because it feels so good. but he also loves watching you shake and come undone over and over and over

thigh riding: he's so amazed on how you can get off on only his thigh. it makes his dick throb so fucking hard for you. even if you don't touch him he could still cum from watching you.

dumbification: he may not be the strongest guy but he has stamina and will use it. he loves to see you all fucked out and trembling, even if it means overstimulating himself in the process.

somnophilia: consensual of course.. armin loves to finger you while you're asleep... listening to your shaky moans as you begin to stir. he also loves waking up with your lips wrapped around his cock

breeding: this ones little. he just loves the idea of having a family with you, it makes him so happy

l // location ( where they like to do it the most )

bed, specifically yours. it's a territorial thing for him. you're his and his only and he's gonna let you know.

he also like it up against a wall, your hands just grabbing onto him for dear life as he plows you up it

m // motivation ( what turns them on )

literally anything turns him on. and when i mean anything i mean anything and everything. you're just talking? he's hard. you're reading a book? bam. he's hard. you're sleeping? hard.

n // no ( their turn offs )

anything that involves hurting you ( slapping, pinching, biting etc ) he could never bring himself to do it ( but he does like receiving it )

o // oral

LOVES eating you out, could do it for houuurs just because he loves the taste. loves feeling your squirm and clench around his tongue and fingers... it literally has him grinding against the side of the bed

he likes receiving too but not as much. gets absolutely weak in the knees seeing your pretty lips wrapped around his dick

p // pace ( fast ? / slow ? / rough ? / sensual ? )

armin likes it slow but rough... languid but deep strokes that reach only the deepest parts inside you. likes being close and pressed up against you while he fucks you nice and good.

q // quickie

he prefers not to do quickies but if it's needed it's needed and he'll be more then willing to get it on with you in a bathroom or closet

r // risk ( are they up for experimentation ? )

he loves trying new things !! anything that involves learning something new he will be so down for. you want to peg him? absolutely!! you want him to choke you? yes!! he loves finding new things you guys can like together.

s // stamina ( how long and for how many rounds )

like i said... armin isn't strong but he has stamina. if life was normal for them i would bet on my momma that he would run cross country. so he can go and go and go for rounds without getting too tired. he just wants to make you feel so good and loves seeing you all fucked out. yes he may be overstimulating himself in the process but it's so worth it.

t // toys ( do they own toys, use toys ? )

not really. toys aren't really something either of you need in the relationship. but as i said, armin is up to experiment and if that means bringing in a vibrator then he's all for it.

u // unfair ( how much they like to tease )

he doesn't hate teasing persay... he just likes getting to the point. he gets very impatient and needy and really has no self control when it comes to teasing.

v // volume ( how loud are they ? )

armin as pretty moans. a little on the feminine side but my god are they music to your ears. cute little whines and whimpers falling from his lips as he struggles to keep his orgasm at bay. whew.

w // wild card ( random headcanon )

likes when u finger his ass... what can i say

x // x ray ( what's going on under the clothes )

he's not huge. maybe 6-6.5/7 inches. but he knows how to use it. it's not the size of the ship... it's about the motion of the ocean. ( pun intended )

y // yearning ( how high is their sex drive )

if you let him, armin could fuck you all day every day. his sex drive is through the fucking roof. he just loves you so goddamn much and wants to be near you all the time.

z // zzz's ( how quick are they to fall asleep ? )

he cleans up, snuggles up to you and is passed the fuck out. he may have stamina but once all the energy he exerted catches up to him he's out like a light. but you don't mind cuz so are you.

[lavenderjacobs]

fluff alphabet - Sapnap

➳ wc; 2,1K (she’s a long one lol)  ➳ pronouns; gender neutral<3 ➳ song reccomendation; heart eyes - coin

A=Attractive (What do they find most attractive in a partner?)

nick’s an ass guy and you can’t convince me otherwise. he’s also just loves your thighs and your stomach. he loves how soft your skin is, and how good you smell. whenever he’s sad he just rests his head on your stomach while you tangle you fingers in his hair. 

B=Best memory (Their favourite memory of you)

he cherishes your first kiss so much. he just has such a soft spot for that memory. the moment he finally found out you felt the same about him, the moment he finally found out what your lips against his felt like. it’s just something he had looked forward to for forever, and to him, it was perfect. 

C=Cuddles  (What type of cuddles do they like?)

sapnap is a WHORE for cuddles. if it where up to him, you two would just lay in bed all day, tangled in each other’s arms. after a long day, he just wants to hold his favourite person and fall asleep with them, so he just wraps his arms around your waist while he uses your chest as a pillow. but if he’s in a chatty mood, he’ll just talk your ears off, ranting about something he finds interesting, while you’re all snuggled up in the crook between his neck and shoulder. 

D=Dirty mind (Do they have a dirty mind?)

I mean, come on. it’s sapnap. we all know he does. he gets *excited* very easily, which can sometimes get in the way when you two are just trying to cuddle. he just has such a soft spot for your body and has to have his way with you once certain ideas have entered his mind. 

E=Effort (How much effort do they put in the relationship?)

nick would definitely try his best. honestly you don't care if his plans actually turn out the way he intented them to, it's the thought that counts. and nick knows that. but theres just something about you that makes him want to spoil you and treat you like a princess. so prepare yourself for fancy dates, him making you your favorite food, all that type of stuff.

F=First date (What was your first date together)

arcade date arcade date arcade date. sap is super competitive and I feel like he would thrive in an arcade. he would play it off like he was just trying to proof how good he was at the arcade games. but he'd just love to see how hard you would be trying to beat him. obviously he'd let you win a lot, and when he collected enough tickets, he would get you the biggest prize he could find.

G=Gentle (How gentle are they with you?)

it....depends???? lmao. nick CAN be super gentle with you, he’s pretty protective of you and would never want you to get hurt, so he’s definitely very careful not to do anything to hurt you. but sometimes his instinct just kinda takes over and well, he can get pretty rough. 

H=Hands (Do they have nice hands?)

hmmm nick has like,,very manly hands,, if you know what i mean. i dont know, they're just so rough but yet so pretty??? and they're like really big compared to yours so when he holds ur hand, yours looks so tiny in his. and omg he won't shut up about it. "LOOK AT YOUR HANDS THEY'RE SO SMALL🥺"

I=Impression (What was their first impression?)

he just thought you were so ~cool~. like he immediately knew he wanted to be your friend. he was just so in awe of how funny, chill and charismatic you were. and it literally took two days for him to develop a crush on you. his friends would notice this right away and tease him about it so much omg.

J=Jealousy (Do they get jealous often? If so what do they do?)

YUP. nick gets jealous so easy yup yup yup. jealousy, protectiveness, possessiveness, you name it. you two would often get in fights about this, but most of the time you would just think it’s cute how riled up he gets. he doesn’t get mad at you (because you’re his precious little baby and can do no wrong in his eyes :D) but god help the souls of whoever tries to flirt with you, because they’ve got a hell of a storm coming.

K=Kisses (What type of kisses do they like/give?)

god nick’s such a passionate kisser. or at least he can be lol. he loves the way your face fits into his hands, and how soft your lips are. so he definitely is a fan of just some wholesome passionate kisses. but damn this man gets sloppy when he wants to. his lips constantly trails off to your jaw, neck and collar bones.

L=Love  (Do they show their love?)

i feel like his love language would be like a mix between words of affection and physical touch??? he’s definitely very verbal with his love for you. he doesn’t shy away from saying i love you or letting you know how much he appreciates you in any other way.

M=Memory: (Their favourite memory in general?)

there are certain moments where nick just sits back, watches, and realizes how amazing his life is. and how grateful he is to have you. for example, you were playing minecraft on his pc, and your house kept getting blown up by creepers, he found it adorable how mad you got every time. he just watched you play, while sitting on his bed. after a while, you looked over at him, and caught him staring. “what?” you asked after letting out a soft chuckle. he felt like he was gonna explode from how much he loved you. 

N=Nickname  (What nicknames do they call you?)  

i’m getting very strong “baby” and “doll” vibes from nick. he loves baby-ing you and smothering you with other loving nicknames. just any petnames that show how much he loves you he’s all for. he would also love calling you “pretty” or “beautiful” for obvious reasons. 

O=Over  (What happened the one time you ‘broke up’?)

nick HATES fighting with you, but once you two get into an argument he can get pretty carried away. he’s definitely the type to let his emotions get the upper hand on him. raising his voice a lot, stuff like that. but the second you leave to get some space he just breaks down. sliding down the wall and resting his face in his hands, just letting all the emotions out. he never meant to hurt you. when you came back to him, ready to be enclosed in his arms again, he had a hard time letting you back in. he just felt like he didn’t deserve you after he treated you like this. it took some convincing, but once you broke down his walls again, it was like he gave you all the love in his body. just smothering you with “i’m sorry”s and kisses. 

P=Parents (What would they be like as a parent?)

dilfnap dilfnap dilfnap  omg he’d be such a good dad. like just very caring and loving, but also strict and stern when he needs to be. he’d constantly be telling stories to the kids about the absurd adventures him and his friends would get into, and omg the dad jokes he’d make. idk maybe it’s my daddy issues but dad sapnap lives in my mind rent free. 

Q=Quirk (Something special about them)

he loves holding your hand. especially in public. if you’re in a crowded space, he just holds onto you very tightly as not to lose you. or if you two are just going on a walk together, his hands would just feel so warm and soft around yours. and omg he loves it when his hands are in his pockets, and you put your hands in there with him, and intertwine your fingers with his. hmmm he gets so soft when you do that.

R=Romantic (How romantic are they?)

i- uh- I MEAN HE WOULD TRY he really would, and again, that’s all that matters. I feel like he would be the type to try to prepare a whole surprise dinner, he would cook all the food himself, he would set the table all cute, with candles and shit, but just completely ruin the surprise by accidentally giving it all away by saying something or just behaving very obviously suspicious. 

S=Sad (What are they like when they’re sad?)

he just gets really quiet. he would never want to bother you or be a pain in the ass by complaining to you. but obviously you notice when something is wrong with ur bby boy. a sentence like “are you okay?” or “what’s wrong?” would immediately send him over the edge, burying his face in your chest, trying his best to supress his sobs. but he eventually calms down, and once he does, he’s able to just rant to you about whatever is bothering him.

T=Together (What are they like when you’re together?)

i feel like it would really depend on his mood, like he could be either SUPER chill, just wanting to savour the time you two had together. or he could be really hyper, constantly talking, wanting to do all kinds of activities with you. he’d be the literal definition of :D

U=Understanding (How understanding and empathetic are they?)

very. i just get such empathetic vibes from him. he’s such a good listener and he’ll just listen to you talk whenever you have something to be upset about. he never invalidates your feelings and omg he’d give the best advice. 

V=Value (What do they value most about the relationship?)

he loves that he can 100% be his self around you. there’s no part of his personality that he feels like he has to hide, or tone down, whenever he’s with you. you also aspire him to be his best self, he just wants to be the best boyfriend in the world. all his friends have noticed this too, you bring out the best in him.

W=Wedding (Would they want marriage? If so what would they like?)

eh. if you’re a person who really values marriage, he’d 100% do it for you. but it’s not like he HAS to. he gets a bit scared by the idea of this whole big event, where everything is about you two, he would way rather celebrate the love you two have in the comfort of your own home, just the two of you. the one thing he would love about a wedding, would be seeing you all dolled up, walking down the aisle, omg he’d be the proudest man ever to be able to call you his.

X=X-Ray (How well can they read you?)

the SECOND you start to feel sad or depressed in any way, nick notices immediately. he knows you better than anybody else, and he knows exactly what to do to cheer you up. it’s like his superpower. if you’re feeling anxious he’ll just wrap his arms around you really tightly, holding on to you until you calm down. and when you’re sad, and in need for something to cheer you up, he’ll take you outside for a walk in the park, or he’ll just sit in bed with you, watching your favourite show. 

Y=Yuck (What they would never want in a partner)

he hates when you flirt with his friend, even when you’re very obviously joking. his jealous ass can’t deal with that lmao. he also gets super pissed when his friends make flirtatious jokes towards you, they know how much it gets on his nerves and that’s really the only reason they do it. but omg he gets so pissed when it happens. 

Zzz (How do they sleep around you?)

nick would be the cutest sleeper ever omg. he doesn’t like to admit it, but he loves being little spoon. he loves resting his head on your chest, while you play with his hair, patiently waiting for him to fall asleep. 

[dootdootwriting]

AHHH CONGRATS ON 600!!! I hope you're doing well heehoo and if its okay can i ask for the whole alphabet with scaramouche?:3 (also pls don't overwork yourself jdjajdkdlfmmeis)

600+ event!!

this is my first time writing for scara so i hope i did okay aha,, under the cut for length!

fluff alphabet with scaramouche, gn reader, warning for inazuma quest/scaramouche backstory spoilers!!

why is his name so long

A-Activities (what do they like to do with their s/o? How do they spend their free time with them?)

- scaramouche isn't super knowledgeable about relationships, so he'll just sort of tentatively ask what you want to do and go along with it (though he might act like it's a stupid idea the whole time). really he doesn't care what he spends his free time on as long as you're a part of it.

B-Beauty (what do they admire about their s/o? what do they think is beautiful about them?)

- well first of all, he admires the courage you've got to have to be with him in the first place. other than that, he also loves your smile (but you won't hear him tell you that out loud, unless you're not really asleep when he thinks you are)

C-Comfort (how would they help their s/o when they feel down/have a panic attack etc.?)

- another thing he's alien to. at first just starts telling you to calm down and is pretty harsh about it. when he realizes this isn't working, he'll reluctantly take you into his arms and start awkwardly patting your head. it's funny how awkward it is and you end up laughing at him about it, which makes him annoyed, but at least now you feel better.

D-Dreams (how do they picture the future with their s/o?)

- scaramouche... either wants you to be by his side as he conquers everything and shows the world just how strong he is, or he wants to do it alone. though it would be much better if you were with him and it makes him sad to think about you not being there in the end.

E-Equal (are they the dominant one in the relationship or rather passive?)

- surprisingly passive, actually. he doesn't really know what he's doing so he lets you make most of the decisions about dates and spending time together. other than that though, he likes to drag you around to do whatever he wants.

F-Fun (what do they do for fun with their s/o? what’s their idea of a fun day out?)

- what's fun? on a day off, scaramouche will wander around and ponder his own existence. you'll have to take him to a market or a park or something so he can actually experience things first - once you do, you'll find he enjoys being alone with you somewhere quiet, where he doesn't have to listen to other people.

G-Gratitude (how grateful are they in general? Are they aware of what their s/o is doing for them?)

- doesn't show it, but is definitely grateful, though he also doesn't know just how much of a hassle he can be. scaramouche just sort of assumed love was supposed to be unconditional... but he can tell when he's crossed a line, and he's grateful for you sticking by him despite everything.

H-Honesty (do they have secrets they hide from their s/o? Or do they share everything?)

- obviously the one big secret is how he came into being in the first place, but once he trusts you enough to tell you about his being a puppet and a test, he's in all the way. he hides little things from you before that but once he's told you, you're in it with him forever whether you like it or not, and that means he doesn't keep anything else from you.

I-Inspiration (did their s/o change them somehow, or the other way around? Like trying out new things or helped them overcome personal problems?)

- he's a lot more tolerable around you! you've been approached by fatui officers asking you "how do you do it?" and saying things like "thank you so much i totally thought i was gonna be yelled at today!" somehow you cool off his temper a bit.

J-Jealousy (do they get jealous easily? How do they deal with it?)

- JEALOUS JEALOUS JEALOUS man. he gets jealous so so easily and WILL confront you about it. after a while and once he knows he can trust you he gets jealous less frequently, because he knows you're with him for the long run.

K-Kisses (are they a good kisser? What was the first kiss like?).

- bad kisser at first because he's probably never been in love before. he gets the hang of it quickly though! your first kiss was because he had to shut you up and he couldn't figure out another way how so he just kissed you. you yelled at him after that.

L-Love confession (how would they confess to their s/o?)

- scaramouche confesses on purpose but in a really weird way. he plans it and everything - he takes you out to see the sunset and brings food (almost like a picnic) but then once he gets to the actual confession it's just like "how dare you do this to me? i stay awake at night thinking of you and somehow you're the most tolerable person i've ever met. childe had the audacity to call it love and to laugh at me so he got what he deserved. if you don't feel the same way i'll punch you too." but he doesn't end up having to punch you, which you're both very glad about.

M-Mornings (what’s it like waking up with them? do they sleep late or wake up before the sun rises?)

- he didn't have a reason to sleep in late until he started sleeping next to you. now he's stuck in his ridiculous sleep schedule so he always wakes up before you. but hey! bonus! now he gets to look at you while you sleep, which for some reason makes him extremely flustered (which is really cute to wake up to).

N-Nicknames (what do they call their s/o?)

- just calls you your name 🧍

O-On cloud nine (what are they like when they are in love? Is it obvious for others? How do they express their feelings?)

- when he discovered he was in love he got angry at you. then he realized it wasn't your fault, and, actually, this wasn't such a bad thing. man were you confused though. for a solid week he just yelled at you for no reason. childe guessed correctly when he realized scaramouche's more-unusual-than-usual behavior, but he had the decency to hold his tongue around you.

P-PDA (how are they with PDA? is it fun to them or are they more reserved with their affection?)

- hates pda. will hold your hand and that's it if you try to kiss him in public his face will scrunch up and his ears will pull back instinctively. then he'll avoid you for the rest of the day.

Q-Quirk (some random thing they do when they’re with you for no reason in particular)

- gently taps you at random moments, almost as if he's trying to remind himself that you're here with him.

R-Romance (how romantic are they? What would they do to make their s/o happy? Cliché or rather creative?)

- scaramouche tries to be romantic? he's doing his best. he tries all the gooey stuff to make you happy like buying you chocolate and giving you stuffed animals but in reality he has little to no tolerance for this kind of thing and you have to reassure him you love him, not the classic romantic things he forces himself to do. after that he stops, which is a huge relief.

S-Support (are they helping their s/o achieve their goals do they believe in them?)

- he's more focused on his own goals and climbing the fatui ladder, but he's also very invested in anything you're attempting to do. wholeheartedly believes in you, whether he outwardly expresses it or not.

T-Thrill (do they need to try out new things to spice out your relationship or do they prefer certain routine?)

- scaramouche likes the security of his routine and the place your relationship is at. he gets embarrassed at pretty much any new milestone and needs some time to get to them, and he gets cranky when things change suddenly, so uh. no, he likes it better the way it is with little to no changes.

U-Understanding (how good do they know their partner? Are they empathetic?)

- not very empathetic, but is very understanding. scaramouche lacks the ability to feel how you're feeling (is it because he isn't quite human?), but he does understand how you work and function, and the best ways to treat you depending on your mood.

V-Value (how important is the relationship to them? What is its worth in comparison to other things in their life?).

- since you're so important to him, you're about number two on his list of priorities, maybe almost tied with his work in the fatui. he can't stand people, but you've wormed your way into his heart, so he's not letting you go anytime soon.

W-Wild card (a random fluff headcanon?)

- any time you give him affection he's a little startled at first, but he comes to love it and eventually will ask you for hugs.

X-XOXO (Are they very affectionate? Do they love to kiss and cuddle?)

- yes but ONLY behind closed doors. he's afraid if he so much as looks at you lovingly his underlings will laugh at him, and he definitely can't have that. when you two are alone, however, he absolutely cannot get enough of your touch.

Y- Yearning (how will they cope when they are missing their partner?)

- angry angry angry and makes it everyone's problem. when you get back from your trip the mood is dark and agents are running up to you like you're their savior "OH GOD YOU'RE BACK THANK EVERYTHING PLEASE SAVE US."

Z-Zeal (are they willing to go to great lengths for the relationship? If so, what kind?)

- he would literally kill for you (please tell him not to)

[sleeping-on-cracking-ice]

can u do the sfw alphabet for nigari pls??

Sure! Hope you enjoy! 💕

SFW Alphabet | Suguru Niragi

{Alice In Borderland Masterlist}

Character: Suguru Niragi

Genre: dark

Warnings: strong toxic relationship themes, obsessive themes, blood, threatening, manipulation, gaslighting, physical & emotional abuse, a couple of suggestive themes, mention of body checking, mention of killing sprees

Author’s Note: I know I’ve mentioned this before, but just a reminder that I prefer to write Niragi as his true character. I would prefer not to pretend that he’s secretly a good man, because he’s not. Please do not read if you find any of the warnings upsetting or triggering! I don’t want to make anyone uncomfortable!

*this is based in the Borderlands

A - Affection

(How affectionate are they? How would they show affection?)

His love language is so hard to decide

I think he’s a mix of quality time and physical affection

There would be random times where he would just follow you around The Beach

He wouldn’t necessarily even talk to you, just trail you like a shadow

You would be well aware he’s there, he’s not that good at keeping quiet since he’s such a heavy-foot

But you never tell him that, and just give him the satisfaction of believing he’s being sneaky

He would give you random pecks on the cheek when walking past you in the halls

There has been times when you would be talking to someone and he would just run up and pick you up from behind and run off while laughing

B - Best Friend

(What would they be like as a best friend?)

He’d be the most annoying piece of shit

You’d never get alone time, he would always just pop out of the most random places just to annoy you

He wouldn’t want a best friend that couldn’t take his harsh jokes

Everyone at The Beach would be terrified of you two

You’re like the most dangerous duo, no one would want to be put with you two for a game, it’s a guaranteed lose

C - Cuddles

(Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

He would have a weird obsession for cuddling you

Would NEVER do it in front of anyone else though

He’d demand your cuddles, like he would get angry if you refused

Sometimes would just randomly grab you from your friends and drag you to his room so he can lay his head on your lap

“Play with my hair,” “Niragi, I wasn’t finishe-” “Shut up and just do it.”

Would fall asleep just from you braiding his hair

Don’t move though, if he wakes up he’ll accuse you of trying to leave

D - Domestic

(Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

He kind of pushed you into moving into his room with him

He said it’s better because it’s bigger due to his higher wristband number

Would start to believe that you’re kind of becoming more close from moving into his room

But, he’s so bad at maintenance

His job is security, so he doesn’t know how to work in a kitchen or let alone clean

You’d have to clean the room and wash the laundry yourself

Sometimes Niragi would feel a bit guilty and try and help, but would fail miserably and become too embarrassed to even keep assisting

E - Ending

(If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

Brutally

No remorse whatsoever from this man

If he broke up with you, he would tell you in the meanest way possible, probably through public humiliation

If you broke up with him though, oh no hun

He’d at first just not let you break up with him and give you a warning

But if you didn’t listen to his warning, all hell would break loose

I’m talking about pouring buckets of blood through your windows, shooting bullet holes through your door with his rifle in the middle of the night, threatening to kill those close to you

You wouldn’t be able to take it, eventually just going back to him just to make him stop

{Here’s a short headcanon elaborating on this further}

F - Fiancé(e)

(How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

Getting married in the Borderlands is impossible, but Niragi would always look towards the future with you

He would’ve dreamt about going back to the real world and finally being able to marry you

Sometimes he thinks maybe you could run away from The Beach with him and get married by yourselves

But yeah, he would be quick with moving forward and be committed completely to your relationship

G - Gentle

(How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

You already know what I’m going to say

He would never be gentle, it’s not in his personality at all

Physically, he wouldn’t be fragile with you

He’d rough you up a lot, grabbing your wrists or pulling you harshly by your shirt

But when you approach him about it, he would gaslight you into believing that you made him do it and that he has to control you to keep you safe

Emotionally, no

Doesn’t hold any regard for your feelings, says whatever the hell he wants to say

Don’t even think about opening your emotions to him, he would shut them down so quickly by belittling you

“Aww my wittle bunny feewing sad? Deal with it, I’m not a therapist.”

H - Hugs

(Do they like hugs? How often would they do it? What are their hugs like?)

Very sudden and tight hugs

Always gives you a jump scare by sprinting up behind you and throwing his arms around your waist

He would hug you as often as he could

He doesn’t care if you refuse his hugs when it’s just the two of you

But when you refuse in front of people, he gets embarrassed and makes a mental note to teach you a small lesson later

I can imagine him having quite warm skin, so sometimes you would push yourself into his arms if the breeze was making you cold

I - I Love You

(How fast do they say the L-word?)

Would say it as a joke, before you guys were even together

Probably to tease you, or take you by shock

Or maybe that was him being genuinely honest

In the relationship, he would say it when you’re mad at him, because he can’t take you seriously when you’re mad

“Niragi can you cut that out!?” “NOoooo I love you~”

J - Jealousy

(How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

Ohhhh no, they can’t get any worse than this man

His jealousy would be out of control

You can’t even smile at anyone else in his presence

If you did, he would grab your jaw and make you look at him again

One time a new member of The Beach thought that they could try and kiss you, not knowing that you were the infamous Niragi’s S/O

Let’s just say that no one saw them after that incident

He also once backed a man against a wall with his sniper rifle to his head for staring at your ass for a bit too long

Don’t make this man jealous, it never ends well

K - Kisses

(What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

He would use so much tongue it would be suffocating

And he would hold your head in his hands roughly so you couldn’t pull away

When it’s just you two by yourself, there wouldn’t be a moment where his lips were off you

Is obsessed with kissing your neck, could never get enough of it

Would absolutely love it if you kissed around his ears, like he would melt

When in out at the pool or in the lobby with everyone else, he would actually prefer to not kiss at all

He would feel weird if people stared, cause you were his and his only and he didn’t want other people looking at you

L - Little Ones

(How are they around children?)

He would hate kids

He wouldn’t carry a shred of love for them

Most kids would be terrified of him anyway

Kids (if there is any at The Beach) would approach him because they thought his piercings or gun was cool, but he would say some freaky shit that would scare them off

I mean most people would tell kids to stay away from him anyway

But he would have this weird love for watching you play and look after kids

He didn’t know what it was, but it always made him fall deeper in love to see you playing immature games just to keep the children happy and smiling

M - Morning

(How are mornings spent with them?)

You would always wake up before Niragi

Don’t try and leave the bed though because otherwise he would instantly wake and drag you back into his arms and hold you ten times tighter like a cage

Most mornings would be you laying in bed contemplating what to do for the day while waiting for Niragi to wake up

When he does eventually, he would instantly want cuddles and kisses

You don’t get a choice in it of course

Waking up would be a slow process, but you would get there eventually

N - Night

(How are nights spent with them?)

Niragi always works around The Beach until late, so he would probably tell you to go back to the room around 11pm

You would spend the time reading or sitting out on the balcony and watching the stars

Niragi would come back and walk out to the balcony to find you

He would wrap his hands around your waist and push his face into your neck, nipping at your skin

“Are you coming to sleep or what?”

O - Open

(When would they start revealing things about themselves?)

This man would have walls upon walls upon walls

He’s never opened up to someone before and he wasn’t going to start just because he had a partner

He spent years building his personality so he could protect himself from others, why would he suddenly tear it down?

He wouldn’t, the furthest you could ever probably get with him is during a screaming match between you two, he said something in the heat of the moment about his shitty childhood

You would freeze and not say anything as he storms out

But other than that, you were never getting anything out of him

P - Patience

(How easily angered are they?)

I actually don’t think he’d be that easily angered

You could do anything, scream at him, punch him, insult him but he would always keep that cocky smirk on his face

But if you were to publicly humiliate him, that would be another story

If you try to show dominance over him in front of his militant group or other members of The Beach, he wouldn’t hesitate to slap you in front of everyone

He always wanted to be conveyed as the top of the food chain at The Beach, so if you came anywhere near to damaging that reputation, he’d make sure you were put in your place

Q - Quizzes

(How much would they remember about you?)

Every little thing

He’d know you better than you know yourself

It would honestly become frustrating though, because he would know when you’re lying or when you’re hiding something just from your body language alone

I feel like he would ask the chefs who made food at The Beach to always make your favourite dish that reminded you of home

It would probably be the only actual human decency Niragi would show to you

R - Remember

(What is their favourite moment in your relationship?)

His favourite memory of your relationship would be when you brought back a gift for him after your game

You walked past a cute trinket shop on the way back and saw a small glass raven in the window

You thought Niragi would like it because one of his favourite animals is a raven

He would be over the moon excited, but would try to play it off like it’s nothing

He’d keep it on his bedside table and clean it everyday so it stays shiny

S - Security

(How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

He’d never let you out of his sight

He’s incredibly controlling, so he wouldn’t let you have a say in most things

He would always have you by his side, arm around your should tucking you into his chest

No one would even approach you when you’re with him because they’d be too scared he’d get the wrong idea

One time he threw someone over the bar counter and into the glass alcohol bottles because they thought they could try and lure you into their room

He’d be very much over dramatic, almost killing anyone who tried to hurt or flirt with you

At games, he would not let go of your hand

He wouldn’t let you do anything, he would drag you around and kill anyone he sees

Being with him would be a guaranteed win every time, but he sure would make you feel awful about it

T - Try

(How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

He wouldn’t put that much effort at all I think

He’d see all that petty romance stuff as insignificant and a bit stupid

Wouldn’t bother remembering anniversaries, I mean there wouldn’t be much of a point while being stuck in the Borderlands

He has the mindset that you should devote yourself to one another without the need of gifts or dates

The closest you would ever come to getting a date with him is those nights you would spend together on the roof to look at the stars

But even then he would complain about it, because you would have to end up dragging him up there yourself since he doesn’t let you go anywhere without him

U - Ugly

(What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

You already know

Too many to count

He’s violent, he’s aggressive, he’s overprotective, he’s obsessive, he’s abusive, he’s unforgiving, he’s stubborn, he’s unempathetic, he’s psychotic

The list could go on forever

It would always make you question why you ever got involved with him in the first place, even if he didn’t give you much of a choice

Probably the only good thing you would get from him is constant attention and guaranteed protection from anything that could potentially harm you

Being with the scariest man on The Beach would have few pros, but they would still be useful at times

V - Vanity

(How concerned are they with their looks?)

I actually think he’s really concerned about his physical appearance

He probably pierced his own eyebrow, nose and tongue while he was in the Borderlands to appear more threatening

In the mornings, he would take forever to get ready

Probably does body checks in random reflections throughout the day

Yeah idk, I just think based off his personality, he would try so hard to come across as intimidating to keep his insecurities away

Sometimes he would tell you to tell him your favourite things about him just to reassure himself

He wouldn’t even care if you were lying, just hearing it would make him feel somewhat less insecure

W - Whole

(Would they feel incomplete without you?)

He would go clinically insane if he lost you somehow

He’s obsessed with you, why wouldn’t he?

If you didn’t return from a game or if you randomly disappeared, a few people were definitely become a victim of his rage

Would go on a killing spree, blinded by his anger and sadness

Would probably regret it and just sob loudly in your shared room for a bit, hugging your clothes to his chest

He would go searching for you everyday, wouldn’t even keep track of his visa

He had to find you, otherwise he would lose himself further than he already had

X - Xtra

(A random headcanon for them)

I feel like you would be the only person who would be allowed to touch his sniper rifle (I hope that’s what his gun’s called)

I mean obviously not to use against him, but he would give it to you if he ever had to be separate from you during a game for some reason

He would take you out to shooting practice, just aiming at crows or tree branches to help you get the hang of it

Sometimes the shot would be so forceful you would fly backwards onto your back

Niragi would always laugh hysterically at you when that happens

He would never let you use it at The Beach without his supervision though, he’d be so scared you would injure yourself

Y - Yuck

(What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

He would hate a partner with a huge personality

Would very much prefer someone who was more quiet and timid, because they would be easier to control

And he just loves the thought of looking after and protecting someone, even though he’d be really bad at making you feel safe around him

He wouldn’t like someone who acted independent and didn’t need him

He’s insecure so he would need that reassurance that someone wants him

In general wise, I think he would hate sleeping

Somehow he just manages to run off 2 hours sleep everyday

He would get tired but he would just despise sleeping for some reason

It might be nightmares of insomnia, but he never really would bring it up so you wouldn’t ask

Z - Zzz

(What is a sleep habit of theirs?)

He has to be hugging something

He cannot sleep without having both arms and both legs wrapped around you

If you were being stubborn, he would just squeeze you tighter

You’d still be in the same position in the morning

Doesn’t care if you’re overheating, he if wants you close then he’ll make sure you are