#my first ever spon!

[inknighted]

start playing Kinder World here!

I'm also hosting a giveaway on my Instagram where you can win the brand new Cottagecore Decorations Pack and some digital mindfulness goodies!

(I'm not being paid to talk about this game but I may earn a small commission if enough people get the game via my link or qr code 💚 art is my only source of income at the moment so I really appreciate any and all love on this post!)

[ctimenefic]

I know the admins have probably already driven the joke into the ground but if anyone wanted a short meditation on Oscar Piastri, Charles Leclerc, daddy kink and a side of landoscar and carcar, boy, do I have that under the cut

Lando should’ve had enough of thinking by 1am on the Monday morning after the Monaco GP. There hadn’t been much to do but think during the race - ask about the gap to George, think, gain half a second on Carlos, think, catch a glimpse of the battle for 12th somehow two whole laps behind him, think. And in the end, cross the line exactly where he started, because it was fucking Monaco on zero pit stops, and Charles was never going to gamble, so neither could anyone else. 

Maybe it’s too much time spent playing percentages without ever taking a fucking risk, but as he flops back into a VIP booth he finds himself weighing the odds again. Charles is soaking wet for the third time that day - first champagne, second the harbour swill, and now some rank mix of vodka, sweat and liquid fucking joy oozing out of his with every flail. It’s disgusting and adorable and Lando will not be accepting any comparisons to Miami. Not home before sunrise, Lando reckons. Four piss-stop strategy, hah.

Oscar slides in opposite, a clutch of beers in hand, because he’s still super fucking awkward about bottle service at Jimmy’z coming via girls with tiny skirts, even though Lando has explained, like, four times by now, that is kind of the point of bottle service.  “Not taking a spin on the decks?” Oscar asks, because he’s secretly fifty years old. 

“Nah, tracks were mid. Not dancing?”

Oscar shoots a look over his shoulder at the increasingly large space around the second prince of Monaco. “Ah, no. Might’ve had a boring race but I don’t need to take my life in my hands.”

And that’s when it happens. The line just materialises in his brain, as instinctive as correcting for understeer. 

Not even with your new daddy? 

He barely gets ahead of it, teeth slamming shut after an inhale. And his brain starts racing, harder than he raced all fucking weekend. He’s got a rep for saying stupid shit off the cuff, but this one he thinks about. 

Maybe he says it, and Oscar snorts and drinks his beer, plays it off with a joke about his brother Leo, his uncle Arthur, whatever six new permutations of the joke have evolved as everyone with so much as a sniff at a paddock pass gets shitfaced in the same club.

Maybe he says it, and Oscar’s eyes widen, too taken aback to laugh, but weirded out, and there’ll be a few stilted messages before Montreal wipes the slate clean. And Lando will play things straight, in all senses, til at least summer break.

Maybe he says it, and Oscar’s freckles disappear into the flush across his cheeks. He’ll dart another look back at Charles, shove his beers into Lando’s reach, and stride across the dancefloor to Charles and Carlos and Pierre. He’ll get his hands on Charles’ shoulders to steady him, when he beams back drunk and sloppy, and he’ll share some twist on Lando’s joke, wry and quiet and yet perfectly clear over the thump of what is objectively a mid remix. And Charles will listen and blink as the words leak through to what little remains of his conscious brain six hours after the fucking win of his life. Maybe then he’ll laugh, so loud Lando can hear it, and Carlos and Pierre too, and Oscar will look back at him and grin and sure, the remix is mid, but Lando kinda wants to dance actually. 

Maybe Charles won’t laugh. Because that’s another set of odds - Charles isn’t going home alone, he’s going to slip-stagger through the streets that love him in someone’s arms, maybe many someones. Maybe Charles won’t laugh, but he’ll hook a sweaty elbow round the back of Oscar’s neck, and get a grip in Oscar’s hair, and they’ll dance like they just got 1-2 in Monaco. Lando will be stuck in the fucking booth watching as Charles’s bracelets catch the lights when he winds his arms round Oscar’s neck, catch the flash of the stupid sponsor watch when Oscar puts a steady hand on his waist. And he can’t read lips, can’t know, but Oscar will lean close to say something in Charles’ ear, and Lando will know it’s “Daddy” a few hundredths before Charles gasps.  And it’ll be too public, Jimmy’z on a fucking GP Sunday, Carlos might let Charles burn alive but Pierre’ll keep it clean, but Lando will know, Charles will know, Oscar will know - il predestinato and the rookie who could, on a fucking collision course. 

Or maybe Charles won’t laugh, and he’ll get a grip in Oscar’s hair, and Oscar will lean close, and Pierre will steer them to the door, pull in George and Alex to run interference, because they understand appearances, and Charles will take Oscar back to his flat, the only place any of them have in Monaco that feels truly like a home (no offence to Kelly, but her decorating is straight out of Pinterest’s Most Wanted). Oscar’ll fit there, among the knick knacks and family photos and all the shit Charles still has because he didn’t move every six months of his teens; Oscar’ll earnestly compliment some quilt or throw that was made by Charles’ 107-year-old grandmother and Charles’ll look at him with those huge doe eyes, and the fog of alcohol will clear but the intent will still be there, hot and possessive. Maybe Oscar doesn’t need to call him daddy now because Charles is smart enough to see a trophy when it’s in his hands. So he’ll press him up against his piano because what neighbour is going to complain about noise the night Monaco’s man won the GP, even if chords turn to the half-shouts of a beautiful boy being fucked out, the squeak of sweat-soaked skin on polished ebony. Lando will wake up with his mouth tasting like death and a short message letting him know he’ll be alone on the McLaren jet, unless he offers George a lift, and he’ll have to decide what’s worse, styling it out or feeling George look at him every few minutes, long fingers on the executive-suite sick bag they hide down the side of the seat. 

But maybe Charles will laugh, and Pierre will laugh, but Carlos won’t. Carlos’s jaw will work like he’s taking a grid place penalty for a racing incident, and then he will laugh, but low, mocking. Osc’ll turn, already annoyed, shoulders rising, but Carlos will drop a lazy hand on the nape of his neck and squeeze as he gestures with the other, back and forth, a two-fingered point and shake at Charles, then tapping twice on his own chest for emphasis. He’ll tug Oscar in closer, and there’ll be some of their usual animosity in it, too much strength, Oscar’s chin tilted forwards. Carlos will set his mouth against Oscar’s ear and say “he can’t be your daddy”, or whatever, the smooth operator equivalent, except Carlos is never smooth, just raw and fucked up and hot enough to blast through anyone’s higher brain function. So Oscar will follow when Carlos saunters out, and only someone who knows him well will be able to see beyond that blank expression that he’s practically shellshocked. Carlos won’t notice; Carlos will take him to a hotel room, tease him about putting him on his knees in the parking garage, in the elevator, somewhere where the cold could seep through Oscar’s unbearably thin trousers, but only really send him down once they're behind a locked door with plush carpet underfoot, because Carlos is a bit of a bastard but really good at casual, considerate without it coming across as anything so frightening as real feelings. He’ll tell Oscar to say it again, say it until he’s hoarse, and if Oscar chokes on the word that’ll be nothing to Carlos’s dick, not when Carlos has something to prove and three hours of staring at Oscar’s rear wing to motivate him. And Lando won’t fly out alone, but Oscar’ll be quiet and rumpled and he’ll ask for extra lemon in his fucking ice water and that’ll be worse, so much worse. 

So maybe he doesn’t say it. Maybe that’s it, and they dance and they drink and nothing changes. Seventy-eight laps and he finishes where he started, Oscar one position out of reach. 

Or. 

Or he says it, and Oscar says, “What.”

He says it, and Oscar says, “Sorry, repeat that?”

He says it, and Oscar says, “I don’t think you want me calling Charles daddy.”

He says it, and Oscar says, “Say that again. No, just the last word. Say it to me.”

And Lando will- he’ll- he’s going to-

His race stutters out. He blinks, and the mid remix hits the chorus again. 

Oscar’s looking at him, a half smile on his face. Slightly expectant, like he’s learnt to anticipate one of Lando’s jokes. 

Lando opens his big fat mouth. 

[nach0]

MCYT Yuri Week; Day One - Dance/ Break

"Are you taking notes on our date?"

Wordcount: 1504

AO3 Link

It’s not often Pearl and Gem get the chance to relax and take some time away from things. It should have been nice, and by all accounts would’ve been, if only Gem could stop stressing for five minutes.

(Featuring art at the end!)

Gemini Tay, Grand Wizard of the Crystal Cliffs, was proud to say she was good at social interaction. It’d be disappointing if she wasn’t, after all the time she’d put into studying the cultures of each and every important person she’d ever have a chance of interacting with.

It was like a test. A constant, neverending test that she had to pass or else she’d start a war.

But she definitely wasn’t on edge at all! Large formal events totally didn’t make her nervous in any way! In fact, one on one interactions should probably be a breeze in comparison.

Courting wasn’t something she’d ever bothered to study. The Crystal Cliffs historically hadn’t held any close alliances for more than trade, the previous Grand Wizards emotionally detached by design. She’d thought herself the same, even after the Wither Rose Alliance was formed. It was the most involved the Cliffs had been in hundreds of years. Still, romance was something she hadn’t considered. It involved too much trust, too much vulnerability, for her to ever picture herself wanting.

That lack of foresight left her cramming every book on romance she could get her hands on five minutes before her very first real date with Pearl.

Apparently they’d been on ‘dates’ before, quiet moments stolen away in the midst of the chaos that was their lives. Pearl had mentioned a stargazing date fondly, leaving Gem thoroughly confused. It had been entirely spontaneous, she hadn’t even dressed up or planned anything, and it didn’t line up with anything she’d learned about how dating worked.

Not for the first time she wished there were more books on Helianthian culture. Maybe it would help her understand the distinction between ‘date’, ‘hanging out’, and just ‘chilling.’ She still wasn’t sure if they were all separate things yet. Maybe she could ask? But then it would reveal how little of her girlfriend’s kingdom she knew, then Pearl would get offended and break up with her, then leave the alliance, then the Cliffs, Mythland, and the Grimlands would all be without food and everyone would starve.

She was spiralling again. It was thoroughly unproductive.

None of her books were helping anyway. They were all about formal courtships, something Pearl had laughed about with her before-

“Now I get the intent,” she’d said, giggling slightly as she put the sunflowers into a vase. “But he would have had to buy these from my empire to gift them back to me.”

“Traditionally, it’s considered a sign of respect to give things of the courtee’s empire. It shows an interest in the culture they come from, and a willingness to compromise and combine their own culture in the process.”

Pearl rolled her eyes with a smile and Gem quickly closed her mouth, a long honed instinct from accidentally finding herself on the edges of people’s patience, but she got the odd impression that Pearl wasn’t annoyed at her.

“All this courting stuff has its place, but it’s not for me. If I find someone I want to go out with, it’d be nicer if it was natural. And if I don’t… no big deal. I’m happy with what I have. Besides, I know my type.”

Gem’s heart quickly found its place in her throat, thumping so loud she was surprised Pearl couldn’t hear it. “Can I ask what that type is?”

“I can say for sure it’s not-” Pearl squinted at the note, “-Brad from Mythland. Sorry buddy, better luck next time.”

They both laughed, and the matter was dropped.

-or wild, whirlwind romantic fantasies that moved so fast she had to put them down before uncomfortable bile rose in her throat. The thought of jumping into anything without preparation, but especially something as deep and personal as romance, made her nervous. She could handle spontaneity, liked it at times!  But there needed to be trust there first, a baseline to deviate from. Would Pearl try to move too fast for her? Would she say anything against it even if she did? There was no script for her to work from here, no guide to where normal boundaries lay. She was going in blind for the first time in a very long while.

Then a knock at the door signalled her preparation time was up.

“Gem?” Pearl called through the wood, amusement already creeping through her tone. “Did you lose track of time again?”

“No, I’m ready!”

She ran a hand down her shirt to clear all but a few methodical wrinkles, enough to seem casual without looking sloppy, and nodded once in satisfaction. The heavy wooden door opened for her with ease (and she definitely didn’t use magic to make herself seem more impressive.)

“Wow, you look… really nice.” Was Gem imagining the blush on Pearl’s cheeks? She had to be, especially as her voice quickly picked back up into fond teasing. “I didn’t know you even owned any casual outfits.”

The outfit could be considered casual. If one didn’t know the quite frankly overkill amount of thought Gem had put into it. Muted colours to give off a softer feel, an inversion of her regular layers as a symbol she wasn’t acting as a ruler but instead herself. Amethyst around her neck and hanging from her ears both for power in case of an emergency and a reminder of her empire’s resources. Her gloves were, admittedly, mostly just because she wanted an excuse to wear them. But to anyone that asked she could easily pass it off as a combination of the two of them, the stars and moons pattern conveniently fitting. She liked her regular gloves, the leather preventing any distracting textures, but it was nice to make a change every once in a while. 

“I’m full of surprises.” Gem smiled, looking Pearl up and down. She could analyse what it meant later, when they had a quiet moment, but for now they had places to be. “You look pretty as well.”

“Don’t I always?” She flipped her hair, tied up neatly in a braid that made Gem’s breath skip, turning her nose up for a moment before the act broke down into laughter. “Come on, I know you have a schedule for this. Lead the way.”

~

In Gem’s opinion, the date was going pretty well. She’d hit all her talking points and had genuine discussion, Pearl had laughed at her jokes, and she’d learned much more than she’d expected. They were taking a break while their horses drank from a nearby stream, Pearl leaning against a tree and Gem leaning on Pearl. 

It was nice. It was peaceful. It was very abruptly interrupted by the scratching of Gem’s pencil that was so much louder than she’d anticipated.

Pearl cracked an eye open and glanced down at her. “Gem?”

“Mhm?”

“Darling?”

“Yeah?”

“Person I adore more than anything in the world?”

“...Yes?”

“Are you taking notes on our date?”

Gem blushed, ears pressing against her head in embarrassment. She should have been more subtle, or just tried to remember everything she needed to know, even if it meant she’d have less energy to spend on concentrating on what was actually happening, she should-

Pearl pressed a kiss to her head, carefully avoiding her antlers.

“It’s cute, fawn.”

“I just want to get it right,” she muttered, picking at the fabric of her gloves. “I haven’t done this before, before or after becoming Grand Wizard. It’s all complicated and there’s no rules to fall back on if I get lost.”

Pearl hummed gently and unfurled a wing, wrapping it around Gem at her silent nod.

“We just came out of a war with a demon. No one expects you, or any of us, to readjust instantly. If you wanna put this on pause, catch your bearings a bit, I’ll get it. Just tell me, yeah? Don’t get trapped in that head of yours.”

She moved to tap her forehead but pulled back at the last second, humming gently instead. Her gaze didn’t hold any expectations, just a gentle patience and a warmth like the sun.

And oh, Gem remembered why she fell for Pearl in the first place.

“I don’t want to stop. It’s just… a lot. Sometimes. Not that it’s your fault!” She hurried to add. “Rules are just easier to work with, knowing the limits and expectations.”

There was no judgement. The world didn’t collapse, no one mocked her admission of weakness, and Pearl didn’t immediately rescind all of Helianthia’s resources.

It was… a little disorientating, if Gem was being honest.

“That’s ok. We can figure out what works together. I don’t mind if you write your notes or want to set guidelines, so long as it’s not hurting you. Don’t sacrifice what you want for me or anyone else.”

She pulled her ever slightly closer, and the wing around Gem’s shoulders was more comforting than any weighted blanket she owned.

“For today though, let’s just enjoy this break from the chaos. We’ve earned it.”

For once, Gem couldn’t agree more.

(if my laptop messes the colours of this up i'm going to explode btw ^^)

also i know i had a taglist but it's been like a year since i last used it so idk if anyone still wants to be tagged, i'm down for starting it up again though

@mcyt-yuri-week

[str4wb3rriesz]

Cherry bestie im thinking of getting a food scale which one do u recommend 👉👈 🤍

hii i've only ever had one so i have nothing to compare it to but ive had it for years and its still working the same way it did when i first got it

the first pic is of the one i have (it says i literally had it for almost 3 years omg its so loyal to me through my weightloss journey) and the 2nd pic i accidentally found while looking for the one i have and i wish i could buy it too but i dont need it 😭 (cant comment on it tho cuz i havent tried it)

also just a tip, make sure u keep the area around the scale clear while weighing smth cuz its sensitive

both are on amazon btw

links under the cut cuz their names are too long:

mine: https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B01H5ZQTES?ref=ppx_yo2ov_dt_b_fed_asin_title&th=1 heart one: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Electronic-Portable-Weighing-Capacity-Measuring/dp/B0DLKTN74H/ref=mp_s_a_1_14_sspa?crid=YFXHN4MIAACM&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.Y-woCwtjZ9DZAj938M_ATcbxsYLdSvBc3Iw0ffdOZm9umBaVzqetaXU3Ia3x_dbnAQkWwQbRxQdHgxUDqeSiOBJWa_fzga_QxcyDd1yNS3GKWoW1OuvYWYeX21bliL2j8-5aJiNGl70LB35MK6oQRYKMNp9yRL5ZvMigCcnefozNBU4A-5rov9RzcBReRXCwRa6-QsiuFfSbQzyASAkAsw.8a_am77JYFQQsZUMeZLixQ0Gd2m8bI7OE6c2lRnlid0&dib_tag=se&keywords=food%2Bscale&qid=1735946483&sprefix=food%2Bscale%2Caps%2C110&sr=8-14-spons&sp_csd=d2lkZ2V0TmFtZT1zcF9waG9uZV9zZWFyY2hfbXRm&th=1

(why's it so long omg)

[toomuchracket]

noooooooooooo kids for office nerd and girly!!! i love their chill dog owning soft domme/subby boy gig n restaurant reviewing life as is and all theo ther aus have kiddos already

nonparent representation!!!

(but like if they wanted to hang with one of the other boys and his kids and be the coolest aunty/uncle duo ever, i'd eat it up with a spon)

no literally they are just cool aunt and uncle to me (i couldn't help myself thinking of mini matty clones oop blame my hormones) like they're chill getting to just. you know. do all but the very final step of babymaking lol. i do think they're the first people to take baby hann to a concert, though, when he's a young teen and wants to go to some random emo gig, and they love getting to do that with him!! best of both worlds that way, getting to be part of a family but also still getting to live a bit more freely in terms of lifestyle. love them <3

[lauralesbian]

olive listens to the second act of falsettos for the first ever time on a plane very tired and slightly loopy: a liveblog (ish)

my not entertaining, very pathetic thoughts on falsettos. not proofread or edited for typos. read at your own risk.

okay before we begin let me preface by saying im finally just taking a bit to just LISTWN to this shit and trinas song emotionally destoryed me okay. okay

why is the first line just homosexuals. i mean yeah but still

oh this goes

weirdly happy though isnt this guy gonna die

BAR MITZVAH

YABADAVA THE EIGHTIES

ooh speed mode march of the falsettos

the lesbians!!

of course shes a shiksa

WHEEEEEEEEE! WOOOOOOO!

this gooooooes

oh its marvin

“two years” are you NORMAL now

good for trina

ezcept on tje jewish holidays

WHAT NO WHIZZER???

bring him back

HOMOSEXUALS

i wanna go to falsettoland except not really cuz ot would probs suck

yeah. grow tje fuck up

MARVIN. PLEASE.

wait how is he twelve and a half i had my bat mitzvah three months after turning 13

elaborate william finn.

jason stoooop butchering the hebrew. stooooop

im gonna give him a pass simply because ive heard worse

aww the tallit belssing. i think

WALKERMAN

“the last loving thinfh we’llprobably ever do together” noooo youre so emotionally intriguing aha

the whole things WHAT now man who i think matbe js whizzer but i cant tel marvin snd whizzer apart very well is that bad

good for fucking jason

this is my mom literally

hes gonna be a jewish adult

i cant tell wahts gping on (too zzzy)

omg a lesbian

“nouvelle bar mitzvah cuisine” cordelia i love you but please do not do this. just have fucjing bagels you cant go weong with bagels

CONGA

so proud pf jason

i am NOT dxcited for when my brother starts bar mitzvah prep

this song is titled miracle of judaism it has to be good

oh hes being a little straightboy

invite none of them just be a frienless loser like i was lamoo

no i had like four people there

you are TWELVE. DUDE.

you’re not swinging a goth gf you are TWELVE YEARS OLD

oooh baseball

ooooh JEWOSH baseball

same maevin

marvin stop calling your sona pussy

oh eitght its the Eighties

jason cannot play baseball

baseball ⚾️ ooh empji ⚽️ 🏀 🏈

WHIZZER

go off trina. love her

of course he love sbaseball

the lesbians are silly

oh my god. middle aged man core. hes so fjcking pathetic

jason *not 2 fiture penny put photo of cat kn box head here. no service on this plane*

even bald he looks good

stop thinking about your gay love and focus on your fucking sun. loser

i would love to watch jason play badebll (loe?

h

me when i hit the ball

this bitch gets SIX parents at hsi baseball games and my brother gets my mom and me not paying attention because soccer is boring as sbit sorry soccer lovers who also follow penny dimeshee on timblr pkay im rabong RAMBING

me when im in falsettoland

mendel is so bad at his job

this bitch sucks ass.

disgrace to the name of caroline fr caroline abbott would NEVER do such a thing

reagan and pagan as a rhyme ks genius

STOP SLEEPING WORH YOUR BOSS?!??

trina. thag is NOT how you prnounce it

sorry what.

just qhitnyour FFUCKIGN job. you cant do it anyway 😊☺️☺️

god i love ❤️ emojis

wbat a shock marvins back with whizzer

trina be normal please 🙏 i love you

trina calm your shit

yeah why CANT u let goe

as spon as they said that i know everytknhg not gonna be alright

i watched like half of a short clip of this from tje tonies and then went to bed becaus eit was like ten pm and i sleep early because i am a loser if any lf you compare me to bakugo my hero academia i will actually cry anyway the clip was good they were #exercising wby dod i go pn thos tangent

charlotte!!!!!!!!

me when i stick a lightbulb up my ass

okay shes being self important

aww

was that the first eff bomb

what aee they laying

whizzer my man marvin has matured stip raggingi kn him!!!!!!!!!’

god

i cant see anything out this plane window its like 10 pm. past my bedtime

OOH i lvoe me a good musical motif

anyone here watchind minions the rise of gru and know what the FUUCK goes on in it my brothers watcing jt and im so confused

THAGS NOT. WOAAAAAAH

HE DID MATURE!!!!!!!!!!!! “i want it all” “all i want is you” CHARACTER DEVEIPMENT GO OFFFFFF!! i want to write an essay about this man

they gave us quinoa chocolace crunches on the plane

theyre in the coty? damn i would jot think that. they feel like sone sort of pseudo-idyllic suburban lifestyle bitches

REPEATED LYRICS. AHHHHHHHH

Damn this shit is long

this sonf is incorrect i do not hate my parents

thag wasnt funny

jadon. honey. you are so lucky your parendes dotn involve you in bar mitzvah prep. do you want to pick out tablecloth swatches

jaosn i feel like you’re misunderstanding the purpace of the bar mitzvab

what kinda a name ks apple bum

SAUL

better call sa- he WHAT???? HWTA????? HIH????? WH?????? REELING

HE HAS PAITBJNGD OF WHAT NOW???????????????????????

matbe i should have done this while lucid

gonna take a wuick pause sk i can play shitty united app games

okay i got a high score of 0. om back

HE DOESNT yeah i thoight that

what the fuck was that mendel is thag ilatian. we are JEWISH. why did you top it off with dayeinu.

i did bate my paewnts at 12

jason dont you want to be counted in a minyan….

it is not in the torah

god did not say thag

sigh

jason do the fuckingn bar mitzvah.

HELP

even ykkur wife knows you cand do your hob correctly mendel…

one hour left onthe flogh ti can do this

can mtbrother turn his screen birghtness fown

sorry marvinim sore your love os wuite sweet but im gonan catch about four min of sbuteye

“try to stay both kind and young” okah thats powerful

okay marvin. good love ballad.

OH NO.

OH NOOOOOOOOOOO

“something so bad that words have lost their meaning”

whizzer soumds so tired

MARVIN. god i love him

everything is not gonna be alright

oh and now trjnas gonna make me sob

YEAH. 🤧😿

i have things to say about the repetition of everything will be alright and they will be said. eventually

“hahaha… not funny… okay”

gonna bawl my eyes out

“gefiltee fish” “gefilte fish?”

i need to watch this on stage

god he’s just a KID!!!

im not crying you’re crying

the fucking. camaderie.

i am crying on the plane and im trying not to be weird about it

JASON.

heart breaking

i am getting tje implications here bit the thing is i dont like the implications

ive heard this song on character playlists o think

points i SAW THAG LYRIC IN A COMPARISON TO WOE IS ME!!!

i just know jason bar mitzvahs gonna kill me

he brought tje prayer shawl!!

yeah this si. augh. making the best out of a horrible situation <333

would this ever work logistically? no. where is the rabbi? where is the torsh? but emotionally? i am crying my eyes out as i drscend over salt lake city utsh and im not even ahsmwed

MARVIN. GOD. im a marvin fan now not ashamed

they are NOT doing this bar mitzvah right

thats not an actual parshah. or actual trope. i need to stop pointing out inconsisternces

🤧🤧🤧 MARVIIIIIIIN.

ID LIKERO BELIEVE THAT ID DO OT AGAIN AND AGAIN AGAIN:(

waiteajtwait dont they say that thing in this has better come to a stop. OHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

like wine

WERE JUST GONNA SKIP THAT STAGE.

there ar no word sor emojis that can express th e utter fucking heartbreak im going through rn

OH GOD ITS OVER.

PLEASE. PLEASE. PYU CANT DO THIS TO ME.

A REPRISE??? AS A FUCKING FINALE????

whoo boy.

—

hi its airport olive. thanks for getting this far! if you read this all you’re now legally obligated to marry me!

[arklypurple]

ALBUM REVIEW: CLOWN CIRCUS (2003)

(the number scale is gonna be a bit fucked up because i'm not good at giving numerical value to my enjoyment of things)

these are being written as the song plays btw

Error: this is a pretty good opener for the marathon. spoiled a bit by me knowing that there are better opening songs up ahead but that's not any fault of the song itself. 4/5 clowns

Lemon Demon: incredibly OK until the last 2 lines which single (or i guess double) handedly bump it up from 3 to 4. 4/5 clowns

Ten Thousand Light Years Away: forgettable. feels like young neil is trying to have a sound that doesn't work with his voice. 2/5 clowns

Don't Be Like The Sun: this is the first song ever released under the name "Lemon Demon". gotta say, not bad. 4/5 clowns

Bowling Alley: "i mean it was like a freaking acid trip. not that i advocate, uh, drugs, drugs are bad. and uh. and stuff." 5/5 clowns

Wrong: Lyricism that matches some of the better lfthcs stuff, pretty big step up from the stuff earlier on the album in that department. one of the ones i can see myself going back to outside of listening to this album. 5/5 clowns

Hazel's Modus Operandi: what if we set up a rhyming scheme and then suddenly switched out which one we're going with. eh lyricism, ok backing. 4/5 clowns

Idiot Control Now: bacon monkey potatoes *holds up spork* narwhals ROFL!!!!!!!!!!! 2/5 clowns

Pepper and Salt: just awful fake accent. it exclusively detracts from the song. would be at best mid if it weren't for that. 0/5 clowns

Holy Bison Beaks!: wow so meta. would be lower if it didn't come after Worst Song In The Album. we're at the sagging middle of the album i think. wait no the ending is kind of funny that bumps it up a point. 3/5 clowns

Somnolence: spacey start. not bad. i think we might be out of The Bad Zone. yeah this one's good, feels like it could be a closer but there's still 3 songs to go. 5/5 clowns

Fire Motif: the one that i think about most often on this album. spon-ta-neous com-bus-tion of the soul. goes hard. 5/5 clowns

Hyakugojyuuichi 2003: see the title? yeah that. this song is so completely that. also really shitty white rap. tv says donuts are high in fat kazoo. i will kill shmorky with my bare hands. jesus fucking christ verse 6. why is this song so long jesus christ. 1/5 clowns

Elsewhere: ok not bad. yeah this is fine, if a bit slow to actually start. ohhhh my godddd please get goinggggg. this song is built like a midpoint. lyrics are fine. they should swap this with somnolence i think. very rare occasion where i think that a song does not need to be as long as it is (usually the opposite is true. songs should never be under 3 minutes). please just end so i can listen to the albums i like more. 3/5 clowns

[inknighted]

friends I got my first ever #spon #ad ever and I'm so excited

okay everyone act cool I'm about to post it

[meowniee]

Kim Doyoung - First (part 1)

Pairing: Female Reader (Virgin) x Kim Doyoung (boyfriend)

Genre: Romantic Smut

Word Count: 4,2k

Warnings: oral (f) | fingering (f) | loss virginity | established relationship | petnames (sweetie, love, babe)

Synopsis: Doyoung was your best friend since high school, where he was your senior, until one day he confessed his feelings for you. He's always very thoughtful and affectionate, always saying that you should wait his time to try new things. And now you're ready to have your first time with him...

You've been dating for six months now. Doyoung is the sweetest boy that you have ever met. The first thing that caught your heart was his manners, such a gentleman, always kind and attentive with you. He was your senior in high school, but the fact that he is four years older than you never affected anything in your relationship. You've known each other for years now, but only recently has he confessed his feelings for you. He set dinner for you in your favorite restaurant, like the usual ones where you both just talk about your lives and news, but this time he was kinda nervous, always catching your eyes, looking at your expressions and trying to act normal. You talked about your new classes at college, your recent volunteer work and everything. He was so delightfully looking at you, smiling about every word that you spoke, having the best time of his life with his closest friend. Just after the desserts arrived at your table, he got a piercing looking at you, a serious semblant in his face, nervous fingers drawing the little spoon on the table. You were so distracted with the sweet ice cream topped with fresh fruits in front of you that you didn’t realize that the mood changed. “Y/n…” he whispered, looking down a little bit to the spoon he was playing with, not meeting your eyes. Now you can feel his tense and short breath. “Is everything okay, Doie?”, you asked, putting your hand over his. “Well, actually I'm fine now. But in these past months something really caught my mind. This thing made me feel kinda anxious.” He turned his hand that you were holding just a little bit, now caressing your fingers with his. You both do this every time while talking about something difficult, showing that you are there to each other. You stayed quiet, not rushing him through his thoughts, just waiting. “And I think the only way to get me at ease about this is just talking, expressing myself, and then… Well, I will deal with the response later… but I can’t have this for myself alone”. You got so worried about what this all about. You catch his eyes with yours. “You know I’m always here for you. You are not alone, Doie. I’m supporting you in everything you choose. Like… if it’s not illegal, you know?”, you joked a little, to relieve the talk, “But if it is.... maybe we can talk later”, you whispered, giggling softly. He laughed, you accomplished your little goal. You grabbed a little bit of ice cream with a blueberry on top of your spon. It’s kinda melted, but tastes so good. “This is really amazing, you should try some”. Reaching a really red strawberry, your mouth still full of ice cream, you just appreciate the dessert, hoping that this brief moment helps Doyoung to talk further. “I am in love”, he sighs, his cheeks getting a warm soft pink colour. “OH MY GOD! That’s a really good thing, you know?”, you cheered, smiling at his shy expression, “Do i know her?... Or him?”. He looks you in your eyes. He’s so confident now. “Yes… I think you know her better than me, actually”. Your mind starts to think about every girl you are close with. Maybe that girl from the musical rehearsal? Or the one from the history class? “Wow… Wait… Let me think!”. He laughs while watching you gesture thinking. “She has the prettiest smile ever. Her eyes are like a universe when she talks about what she likes. She’s the most careful person, always worried about people around and does her best to make them feel good”, his eyes shining while talking. It’s beautiful to see him talking like that about a girl. You already like her. He’s smiling all over his face. All that tension seemed to go away. “Oh Doie, you really fell for her. That is soooo cute”. You are still holding hands, but now you are squishing his finger while mocking him with a puppy voice. “Y/n…”, he gets your attention and you stop, looking at him, “Yes… I really fell for you”. You choked in your strawberry. The next second Doyoung is helping you, giving a glass with water and patting your back. He laughed a bit after being sure that you were safe and breathing properly.

And here you are, six months later, in his bathroom, brushing your teeth before cuddling watching an animation movie with him in the dorm. You’re wearing a cute oversized shirt and matching shorts, loose hair and no makeup. It’s not that hot today, but with his blanket and a warm hug you will be just fine. When you came out he was just finishing settling the little projector over the wall, with the movie already on display, the lights already turned off, but not completely. He’s wearing a cozy set of grey sweatpants and hoodie. He smiled at your sight and patted the place just next to him, inviting you to sit there, leaned back in the wall behind his bed by his side. You are both alone at the apartment, all the boys went on a trip this weekend, but Doyoung had to stay to attend some rehearsal in his new musical show, so he invited you to spend some time with him. He is the softest boy you've ever known... in just all aspects. You have been his best friend for a long time, so he knows almost everything about you, your life, your choices and everything. He knows all your problems and concerns as well, and he still fell in love. He never pushed you off your limits and respected your decisions about every subject. You were concerned in the beginning of your relationship because… well… you never had a boyfriend before. Your first kiss was with him. Your first date. All yours “first” was with Doyoung. Before your first kiss, he looked deeply into your eyes, taking your face between his hands, leaned his head forward until you rested your foreheads together. “Can I kiss you?”, he asked softly. You nodded in response, eager to know this new feeling, but too shy to make the move. Just then he closed his eyes and leaned his lips against yours, leaving a soft, but long, kiss. His lips were warmer and softer than you thought and the sensation was bursting inside you. You felt a stronger bond forming between you two. A new step in your relationship.

After that day you just wanted more. Feeling more of him in you, his body pressed against yours, his warmness, his gentle touch. But he always wraps up your hands in his chest with a small smirk on his lips when the makeout sesion was getting too hot: “The first time we do something in our lives needs to be special. Need to be remembered with a warm heart forever, with no regrets. We don’t need to rush new things. We just need to wait until we’re ready for them”. He never stepped back on this. You weren't his first girlfriend, but he knew he was yours, so he was always paying attention when you both crossed a little small line in your relationship, reasserting if you were sure about that, questioning if you were read or just curious. You always dreamed about your first time with your lovely one. You just want to be perfect, full of love and care, and he knows it being your best friend for a while. Maybe being aware of it made him more considerate. But now… now you've thought enough about it. You’re ready, aren’t you? Yes, you think you are. You even chose your sexiest lingerie for tonight. You love him, he loves you. You feel safe with him around. He always took good care of you. You think he is the right one for this.

“Y/n?”, he calls you with a finger snap right in front of you. “You spaced out for a moment”. Maybe you are thinking too hard right now. You just hope he hasn’t seen your face brushing. “It’s kinda cold in your room right now”, you said. “Just a minute, I’ll fix it”. He got up and lit three scented candles on the shelf near the bed. “Come on, let’s wrap up”. He sat on our side again, covering you both in the soft blanket, twitching you closer with a hand in your waist. The film started and the room was getting filled by the light candy smell from the candles. You felt so cozy.

The movie was sooo cute! And you both laughed and even cried a little bit in the end. Why do they always have that crying scene in animation movies? Now you were just resting your head on his shoulders, his arms wrapped around your waist. He was laying small kisses on the top of your head. You looked up and reached his chin with a little kiss, bringing up his attention. Your eyes met, he cupped your cheek with his hand, slowly leaning forward to meet your lips. The touch was warm and soft, as always, but you’re both breathing deeper than usual. You felt his arms tightening the touch. You let a thin gasp leave your lips. You were melting little by little in his arms as he deepened the kiss, drawing your lower lip with his tongue, asking for permission to explore your mouth. With the touch of your tongues together, he left a small moan escape. Breaking the kiss, he stared at your eyes and waited for your next move. He left the choice in your hands and you chose to continue, bringing up your hand through his collarbone, the side of his neck, tangling your finger in his hair. The look he gave to you was hot. Like burning hot. You pressed your lips near his ears, feeling him getting tense as you kitten licked him, letting a soft sigh. He suddenly put you on his lap, both hands on your side, holding you steady. You were surprised by him handling you so easily, but now that you are on top of him, you don’t know what to do and got a little ashamed by your position. You feel exposed with your tights opened around him, your core slightly pressed against his intimate part… He was watching every move your eyes were doing down his body, every breath that you had, your cheeks burning red as he lowered his hands to your tights, squishing them a little. We just opened his mouth to ask you the same question...“Yes, I want it”, you answered. Hi giggled looking down, you were the cutest with your begging look, but, this time, your eyes didn't tremble like always. You kept them steady. He took your hands and let them rest in his chest at first, but then slid them down at his abs. He has been working out recently and you could feel the stiff core under your fingers. Your eyes wide-opened when he brought your hands until slightly touched his waistband, but he slided them to his side, making you hug him while he reached his hands to attach at your hair, tilting your head to kiss you deeper. This time he let his hands travel all over your body, caressing your arms, your back, your waist. His kiss was hungry, swallowing all your sounds, igniting all your body. You could feel something inside you tightening.

While kissing you, he laid you on your back, with one hand on your neck, supporting you, and the other on your hip, guiding you to a comfortable position. He lay down beside you, body turned toward, leaning fully against yours, one of his legs between yours. His hand left your hip and travelled your entire arm, reaching the cheek, softly caressing and eventually touching your lips, partially open. He kissed you with love and passion, you could feel his whole body shivering. He wanted this as much as you. He gently let his hand slip under your shirt, tracing paths through the soft skin of your belly, traveling through your ribs, getting close to your breasts, but not touching them. You were breathing hard, letting a tender gasp with the eagerness of his touch, your legs squishing against his thigh. He gently took the hem of your shirt, slowly moving up, revealing your skin. He left your lips with a sigh, looking into your eyes. You could barely look at him, dying of embarrassment at the whole situation but wanting more. He had never seen you in a lace bra… or in any bra. Not looking away from you, he calmly lifted your shirt above your breasts, cupping one in his hand. Closing your eyes, you let out a moan, and he took the opportunity to look at you. Your lacy bra was beautiful and fit you perfectly. Gently massaging your breast with his hand, rolling your nipple between his fingers, and starting kissing you on the cheek, little kisses here and there, moving slowly down your jaw, your neck, your collarbone. You twined your fingers in his hair tighter, burying your face in his neck. He continued, kissing the valley between your breasts, tracing his lips in the lace, kissing the surroundings of the breast that wasn't in his hand, slowly making his way to your nipple. You moaned as he let his lips close on your nipple, squeezing the other in his hand. You could feel his hot tongue through the lace, playing with your nipples like he played with your tongue, making you close your legs even more around his thigh. He pulled you, both sitting in a tight hug now, his lips pressed against your forehead. “Will you let me take it away for you?”, he asked, kindly looking at you. A shiver running down your back while you nodded in silence. He realized that you were very embarrassed about taking your shirt off, so he slid your hands to the hem of his hoodie, silently asking you to take it off for him first. You took advantage of the moment to run your hand all over his torso, until he took off his hoodie completely. He wasn’t wearing a t-shirt. You couldn't keep your eyes on his, lowering them to see his body. You felt a smirk on his face when your lips partially opened with the view. He was gorgeous. You felt embarrassed for being watched, hiding your face in your hands. “Hey…”, he wrap up your hands with his, making you face him, “You can look. And you can touch me as well. Today you can do whatever you want, okay?”. He put your hands on his shoulders, hugging you around the waist, passionately kissing you.

He started to go down, kissing and caressing your stomach, without taking his hands from your breasts, tracing paths with his tongue, making you shiver beneath him. He went a little lower, running his lips over your hip bone, gently brushing the waistband of your shorts. You could feel the hot breath coming out of his mouth so close from your inner thigh. You closed your legs at the feeling. He rose against your lips, kissing you, taking your face between both of his hands. ftly unclasped your bra, laying you on your back again. Your arms tried to cover your breasts instinctively, but he pressed you against his chest, now looking directly into your eyes. “No need to cover yourself, never. I love every inch of you. You are stunning. The most beautiful woman I ever met.”. Letting your arms rest at your sides, he slid one of the straps over your shoulder, then the other, exposing your already hard nipples as your bra fell off. He covered your chest with wet kisses, cupping your breasts in his hands, running his thumb over your nipples, playing with them, alternating between nibbles with kisses. You were almost feeling numb with the feeling, your body extremely sensitive under his touch, your core throbbing in need of something else. He left one nipple with a snap, looking at you and pressing the tip of his tongue against it, making you gasp, sucking it. His gaze was sharp, extremely hot looking at you from below, teasing you, knowing exactly what he was doing. You pressed your nails into his shoulders at the feeling, dropping your head back. He was so sexy doing that.

He started to go down, kissing and caressing your stomach, without taking his hands from your breasts, tracing paths with his tongue, making you shiver beneath him. He went a little lower, running his lips over your hip bone, gently brushing the waistband of your shorts. You could feel the hot breath coming out of his mouth so close from your inner thigh. You closed your legs at the feeling. He rose against your lips, kissing you, taking your face between both of his hands. “We can stop at any time. You just have to tell me to stop. We don't need to go all the way if you don't feel comfortable. Right, love?”. He was so affectionate. You felt so happy to have him as your boyfriend. You nodded in response. “Have you ever touched yourself?”, he whispered shamelessly near your ears, with a deep voice. Your entire face burning under your skin with the sudden question. “Hm… No… I kinda tried once… But…”, you were nervous. Would you need to have done this before? “And was it not good? It’s okay sweetie”. He took one of your hands from him and ran it over your breasts, moving slowly down your stomach and belly. He rested both hands on top of your shorts, pressing gently against your core, his hand over yours, guiding your moves. You felt your core tighten as he started rubbing his fingers in circles between your legs. It was a very gentle touch, but it made your whole body tremble. “Keep doing this”, he asked, moving a hand to your leg, opening it a little more, pressing his leg entwined with his. Your eyes were closed, but you could feel his gaze on your body. His breathing heavy against your skin as he watched you pleasure yourself. You felt his hands leave your body, but when you opened your eyes you saw him on top of you, both hands on your side supporting his body weight, his legs between yours, forcing them apart a little more. He began to run the tip of his tongue down your body, starting with your breasts, down into your stomach to your hip, kissing near the waistband of your shorts. His hands following every move, his body descending more and more between your legs. Looking into your eyes, he kissed your wrist, the back of your hand, and then your fingers, positioned so close between your legs. Your body was on fire, breathing deeply, holding back the anxiety of feeling more. “Can I?”, he asked, holding the waistband and suggestively pulling down. You agreed so quickly that he chuckled softly, kissing all over your leg while taking off your shorts. When he's finished, kneeling between your legs, you could see for the first time the volume on his pants. He saw your look but said nothing, focusing on regaining his position between your spread legs, coming up with nice soft kisses interspersed with little bites. You were stunning in those panties and he took a moment to appreciate, for the first time, your body lying half-naked in front of him. He smiled as he kissed with open-mouth the inside of your thigh, his hands hugging them, opening them more so he could fit between them.

Your hands at your side gripped the sheet, closing your eyes ashamed to look at him there as he kissed closer and closer to where your hand had been moments before. “You can look if you want to”. You opened your eyes in time to see him resting his lips against you, kissing gently through your lace panties. Glad he said you could look, because the view really was amazing. His beautiful face between your legs, his red lips kissing you, his big hands holding you in place, his hips slowly stroking the bed. He brought one hand up to your core, taking your hand with the other, interlacing your fingers and holding tight. He gently began to caress your folds, pressing his lips harder against you. He was really enjoying teasing you, making sure you would be sorely needed. His hot breath between your legs made you realize you were wet. So wet... and he was going to kiss you... there!? The sudden thought was startled as he pulled your panties to the side, pressing his hot tongue against your clit. You instinctively grabbed his hair and tried to close your legs, but he was holding you there for him. You could feel the smile on his lips as he kitten licked you, enjoying every drop of wet running off you. The feel of it was indescribable. Now he was kissing you hungrily but tenderly, making you feel so good with that pleasure, caressing your wet folds with his fingers, playfully pressing against your entrance. You were a little anxious... would it hurt? How does something feel inside you? How could you feel pleasure like that? “Doie…”, you mumbled. He turns his head when he hears you calling for him, watching your slightly red face. “Will it… hurt?”, you whispered, barely audible. He smirked, “Sometimes it happens. So I'm doing my best not to”, he pressed his lips against your soft skin in your thigh, “You don’t need to be afraid”, more kisses, his fingers caressing you clit, “Even if it hurts a little at first.... it will give you a lot of pleasure later”. Still facing you, he pressed his fingers more against your clit, opening your folds with his tongue, starting to push in and out with a slow pace. You rolled your eyes with pleasure, your back arching, a knot inside you forming, burning all your senses. You weren't able to breathe right at this point. You felt one finger press against your entrance, slipping just a little inside you, pressing against your walls, touching new places, adding sensations. Sliding in and out, pressing up inside you, his mouth devouring you, sucking your clit, rolling his tongue. You were on the verge of something. Hips pressing further against him. You wanted to cry. “Don’t hold it back, babe”, curving his finger inside you, hitting your most sensitive spot, you melted his in mouth with a loud moan, a warm wave washing all over your body as your muscles contract. You could hear him groaning while guiding you down your high, cleaning all the mess with his tongue that was dripping from you. Shock waves traveled through your body as you caught your breath. His head lay on one of your thighs as he caressed the other, a proud smile on his lips. You were glistening with sweat, panting. He slowly got up, crawling towards you, wiping the remnants of your juice from his chin. Lowering his head until your noses touched, he looked at you and whispered with a low tone “Do you want to taste yourself?”. You nodded, eager to know what it would taste like. He kissed you like it was his last, letting his tongue touch all over your mouth, his wet lips pressing all over yours. The taste was sweet. Hugging you tight against his chest, he started to roll his hips softly squeezing yours. You were both breathless when you broke the kiss. "I love you, Y/n", he said. If paradise exists, that must be how you feel there. "I love you too, Doyoung". He held you in his arms, your head resting on his chest.

"It was good? Did you feel good?", he asked. He knew it had been good, but he wanted to hear you saying it. "Yes... It was much better than when I did", you mumbled, pressing your head more in his chest. "Do you want some more?", he asked, glancing at you, stroking your hair gently. You suddenly realized that he gave you pleasure... but he didn't get any. Is he waiting for you to do something? What should you do...? You gently start kissing his collarbone, running your soft lips over his skin, stroking your hand down the side of his torso. You hear his breathing deepening, his heart racing. You start to move your hand down, past his abdomen, closer to his sweatpants, slowly running a finger between his waistband and his skin. Suddenly he takes your hand, pulling it close to his chest, pulling his head back so he can look at you. "This isn't about me. Today I want to give you everything you desire. I want to pleasure you", he said. "But...", you looked at his pants, a prominent erection drawn on his gray pants. "Don't worry about that now, babe. I like to give you pleasure and that's how my body responds", he explained, giving you the cutest look in the world, but full of lust. You can see that he was still waiting for his answer... "Yes... I want some... more... of that"...

~~ First (part 2)

[marine-indie-gal]

According to Greek Lore, one of Poseidon's consorts was one of his Sisters (Demeter). In some versions of the Hades and Persephone Myth, Poseidon chased Demeter when both were horses which lead into the birth of their children (Arion and Despoina). Although in some religions, Despoina and Persephone were sometimes worshipped as the Same Person in Arcadia. In the past of Ancient Times, long before Poseidon met Salacia, after when Amphitrite broke up with him and now lived with Neptune, Poseidon had a long quest of looking for the Perfect Woman to be his Bride for a Sea Queen. The one that caught in Poseidon's eyes was Demeter (Hestia and Hera's Sister), the Goddess of Agriculture. Although they didn't mind each other at first, but since Poseidon considered himself to be the most heartthrob of all in the Seas according to Sea Women, he was a Womanizer like his Brother (Zeus). Demeter didn't really had any strong feelings for Poseidon mainly because she considered him a Friend for most of her life when he asked her if she would be his Wife. But when they figured out that they can actually work together as partners to help make the plants grow, they realized that Earth needed more plants which is why Poseidon added his Water to Demeter's Grain. Although he did at least flirted with her, she didn't mind nor care since what she only saw was platonic love and the two had an open-relationship as Demeter always allows Poseidon to be with other people. However, things started to come out different when Persephone came into Demeter's life, that was when Demeter started to work even harder as a Mother taking care of her plant business to herself without Poseidon's help. Being his own vain self, Poseidon thought that maybe he would be Persephone's Step-Dad to be close with Demeter but Demeter still rejected his love for him despite their on and off relationships. When Demeter hears about the Troubled Things that Poseidon did for tricking the Mortal Medusa, she felt disappointed in him but she knew that he was just being himself as the Sea God couldn't help it at all. Poseidon was often too vain as he was being a bit of a narcissist at times but Demeter still cared for Him, seeing on how that she secretly loved him. When Winter came as Demeter's Daughter went missing, soon after a failed job to work as a Nanny for King Celeus in Eleusis, Poseidon came to Her Temple and apologized to Demeter for he felt sorry that her own daughter was missing and that maybe she would be better off as a Queen of both Land and Sea. Sadly, they broke up. Never did they ever became lovers nor did the fact that two Gods would think that they would be a perfect match.

  You can tell I made my own Outfit for Poseidon for whenever he walks on land. I headcanon that Sea Gods in the SpongeBob universe have the ability to turn their own Mertails into a Pair of Legs whenever they walk on the Surface Land. This outfit that I made for Poseidon was briefly inspired by the Statue of Him in the Book; static.wikia.nocookie.net/spon… Demeter and Poseidon (c) Greek Mythology SpongeBob SquarePants (c) Stephen Hillenburg

[deathclassic]

i was tagged by @you-are-so-much-better-than-that​​ and @mikhailoisbaby​​ to do this fic writer/artist tag! ive never seen an artist version of this so this is exciting :D

1. Do you post on Ao3? If so, how many works do you have on AO3? If not, where do you post?

i dont post art on ao3 but i post fics there,,,,not gonna say my username though

2. What is your total art count?

we gotta be like 500+ by now

3. What are your top 5 pieces by likes/kudos?

they’re all dan and phil surprise surprise i was surprised that the first one has 12k notes for some reason. im just going to link them

spooky week sketches  amazingphil shop spon PHIL QUIFF DEBUT!!! black ‘n’ white dan phil is not on fire collection

4. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

i try to but sometimes i forget and i also dont have notifcations on any social media turned on so i miss a lot of things

5. What is your current fandom, and what was the first fandom you drew for?

currently drawing for umbrella academy, shameless and stranger things. first fandom i properly drew for was one direction but i was drawing stuff for like panic at the disco and powerpuff girls and my little pony and my chemical romance when i was like 7

6. Have you ever received hate on any art?

tonnes lol, i’d say every 2-3 pieces i draw gets some kind of negative attention. recently there’s been an asshole in my asks accusing me of fetishising ian and mickey so thats something to look forward to every time i pose 

7. What’s a fandom/ship you haven’t drawn for yet but want to?

i want to go back to shows i watched as a kid like total drama island and draw the characters in my art style, i did it with the winx club earlier this year and it was fun. i want to draw harringrove but im not mentally prepared to be like,,,sent death threats atm

8. What’s your all-time favorite ship?

i dont know tbh ian and mickey are up there i guess

9. Do you draw outside of fandom?

yeah im a graphic designer so i draw a lot of shit 

10. What’s the an art piece you’ve drawn that came out completely differently than you expected?

this one actually

11. Do you draw smut?

sometimes

12. Have you ever had any of your art stolen or copied?

yeah of course, someone sells my shit on redbubble and i have to keep reporting them

13. Have you ever collaborated on a piece?

yes! @mishervellous​ and i did that amazing comic together for gallacrafts and im so proud of that! also collaborated with a lot of dan and phil artists to make a calendar, a phil is not on fire poster and some general collabs for fun (if anyone wants to collab hmu bc im down)

14. What’s an idea you have that you have yet to draw?

i really want to draw drummer mickey for some reason

15. What are your drawing strengths?

people i guess, maybe like details on clothes and stuff?

16. What are your drawing weaknesses?

hands and feet lol

17. What’s your favorite art piece you’ve drawn?

im so proud of this drawing even though no one really liked it, like looking at it makes me so happy

18. What is one thing you’d like to tell people about your art that they might not know?

like harvey said haha i also use the same colour palette especially skin tones and hair colours also i sketch a lot of the drawings traditionally and then trace over it on photoshop

19. What inspires or motivates you to create for fandom?

myself. i would still be drawing even if no one notices it. heck i draw so much stranger things stuff only for a top of 10 people across instagram, twitter and tumblr to interact with it. 

20. And finally, can you describe your process a little? Do you have a favourite place to draw? Do you play something in the background? Do you do research or just go for it? Give us a little insight

i sit at my desk and use a wacom tablet and my laptop. I have my other laptop open and im normally listening to a tv show that ive seen so i dont have to pay attention or a play through of a game or some creepy stories. sometimes i listen to music on my record player. i always spend ages looking at pose references and rage quitting when i dont draw it right the first time before coming back to it a few hours later. i draw mostly in the evenings, after dinner. sometimes i drink a hot chocolate if its late enough lol. 

im gonna tag @mishervellous​ @doodlevich​ @heymrspatel​ @adakechi​ 

[feelingofcontent]

DNP Rewatch: Buying The 6 Strangest Things From Wish Ads

Date video was published: 12/06/2019 (X)

DNP Main Channel Rewatch: 404

The first of the “Wish recommendations” videos that Phil did. These are similar to his “regret buying” videos, except he doesn’t already own the things.

0:00 - this is peak brown-hair Phil. also love Phil wearing Dan’s new merch instead of his own

0:14 -  Phil had tweeted some of the Wish ads he was getting back in September and October

0:36 - lmao PHIL 👀

0:44 - the teeth are just disturbing

1:11 - “I stole it cause it’s comfy” aww 🥺

1:23 - he’s so excited about it. also love the dramatic scarf toss

1:43 - he had this spon quite a few times

2:41 - yeah, don’t think there are any non-weird recommendations

2:52 - definitely more on the horrifying side

3:12 - oh. oh Phil. 😂

3:55 - “I was intrigued” I feel like this is how Phil ends up buying things...he just wants to see what it is

4:24 - DOG WHEN?!

4:44 - Japan mention! I wonder if someone had to pick all those packages up for him or they had them held until they got back...ordering packages when you know you’re going to be out of town doesn’t seem like the best choice

4:49 - the fact that he really thinks those are live worms...

4:59 - “size isn’t everything” alrighty then Phil

5:06 - not what you want to start with

5:11 - Phil always has an interesting reaction to different textures

5:23 - he always smells things too

5:28 - Phil really does edit himself a lot less post-coming-out. it’s great

5:44 - I love it. I love it so much

6:05 - just hulking out on the box there

6:11 - already so excited

6:30 - the little singing to himself. DNP must make up little songs like this all the time

6:41 - his excited giggle here is my favorite thing ever 😊

6:52 - he is so entertained

7:10 - and he still has that in his video background!

7:30 - the way the eyes are staring out of the bag is very cursed

7:47 - I love that he had to show these to Dan and get a ‘live’ reaction rather than just showing the camera

7:51 - and Phil not even looking at the camera. and Dan immediately zooming in on his crotch. this clip is everything

8:13 - and then the posed photos! 😂 of course he used this shot to promo the video

8:19 - and this bit! that he chose to leave in! help 😭

8:43 - umm. no thanks to that look, lol. also he’s got it on very crooked

9:08 - everyone knows that feeling now from mask-wearing

9:29 - “quiff destruction” indeed

9:52 - “smells like a nice witch” Phil’s descriptions are so strange and yet you somehow know exactly what he means

9:57 - they’ve still got that match-holder bottle. pretty sure it’s on the shelves in the picture of the forever home bedroom

10:18 - something actually working seems like it should be a pretty low bar...but Wish

10:27 - ending with the most disturbing thing

10:47 - don’t think so there Phil...

11:08 - he’s so pleased about the box!

I adore Phil in this video. It is so cute. I love his reactions to things and how excited he gets. Definitely one of my favorite of the ‘buying-random-things’ videos.

[beautifully-lumpy]

✨ RAMBLY POST ABOUT THE CADDICARUS SPYRO VIDEO ✨

non-spoiler thoughts:

THIS VIDEO WAS AMAZING!!! it was everything i ever wanted and more. i'm an old ancient caddicarus fan from 2014 and oh my goooooddddd i loved this video. i loved it so much. it was beautiful amazing wonderful immaculate i want to marry it. nay, i want to marry the entire goddamn 2020-present caddicarus show.

i can't think of any jokes that fell flat in this episode. like usually there are at least a few that fall flat but this episode was wonderfully written.

it's like...i've been waiting 8 years for this video. there was a point in caddicarus history where we were certain the channel would never hit a million due to the stagnation it was experiencing in the late 2010's. the spyro video was becoming less and less of a possibility...until caddy changed up his content.

this change happened just under a year after i stopped watching, though. for two and a half more years, i kept hesitating and hesitating to watch the newer videos...until he actually hit one million subs. i was sitting in the college library on my first day of junior year when that happened, and i realized at that moment i HAD to return. so i watched the newer videos and was like "holy shit they really are as amazing as they say".

so the spyro video was my first new caddicarus episode since returning to the fandom...and man...i just missed that feeling so much. that wondrous feeling of getting a notification for a caddicarus episode. it's a feeling i hadn't felt in nearly 4 years.

OK BUT LIKE i have so muuuch stuff i wanna do rn. gifs, fanart, edits, etc...like BROOOO. i've fully been transformed back into my teenage self making tons of caddicarus fan-stuff for each new video that drops lmao.

and now for the spoilery thoughts... (this will be very incoherent i'm sorry)

ok but the CAMEOS? genius. if this video was made in 2016 i GUARANTEE he would've dedicated like 2 minutes to each of them, and they would've been saying stuff like "CADDY, PLEASE do NOT play this game, i played this on MY channel and it will CURSE YOU for LIFE!!!". but nope, the cameos lasted like 2 seconds each and almost ALL of them were just them being slightly caught off guard. I LOVE THIS GODDAMN SHOW SO MUCH.

and THE CADDYS RETROSPECTIVES INTRO!! I REMEMBER THAT! I CLAPPED!!!!

and THE BEGINNING CAMEO WITH THE NORMALBOOTS GUYS AND BRUTALMOOSE......crying

it's so funny that the few side characters we saw return in this were spons, baddy, long dennis and sam widge...but we got a shitton of new side characters. AND I LOVE THEMB.......WHEREDIGO MY BELOVED. face face is my new favorite eldritch horror, the COW... and the NEW LONDON COCKNEY CHARACTER WHO PULLED UP TO BEEFY BOYS. i DEADASS thought jim was gonna bring back quick J and was kinda disappointed he didn't jiaowefjoife. but he DID bring back daddy caddy so it's a good compromise.

OH AND WALLACE BIG TOO....AND COUSIN SQUADDY had me laughing my ASS off.

but obviously andrew van is the greatest caddicarus character of all time.

i have lots of favorite bits in this one, like the one where he puts on the clown shoes and kills moneybags. i also loved the one where he greenscreened himself skateboarding, and the return of that bit where he was flying out of the window to katamari music (it was some 2016 video i forgot what it was jsjsjjsjsj), and he ALSO brought back that "just melt it. i'll soak it up. i'll eat it" bit from the spyro orange video. and the SURPRISE MEXICAN BOUNS ROUND...god i'm going to reference this every time i go to a mexican restaurant.

that PUZZLE BIT...jim is such a genius like HOW. HOW does he come up with these things.

and i'm pretty sure that "you have to collect diamonds to FAST TRAVEL???" was a reference to "NOT EVEN THE ARCADE MODE???" from rascal racers

AND I'M NOT SHUTTING UP ABOUT THIS. MATRIX JIM. I WAS CHOKING,,,,

we got some new songs, notably "pink poo bag on your keys" and "i got a million subs". i will have lots of fun learning all the words to these and annoying the hell out of my sister with them.

i hope dead bird of the week becomes a regular thing.

and HOLY SHIT HE JINXED THE REPEAT OF THE CHEESE GRATER INCIDENT. WHY JIM. WHY.

[thewhitejournal]

Movie Night

Aaron Hotchner x Female!Reader Oneshot

requested by: @thomasgibsonfan01

prompt: hey I have a fluff request. for Hotchner x reader where they plan a movie night while jack is at a sleepover but jack gets sick so he comes home and hangs out with them while he gets better.

content warnings: a little cursing, sick little boy 🥺

hope you enjoy love! sorry it took me so long <3

-

A sigh of relief passed through your lips as you closed the last file on your desk. It had been a long day, and an even longer week. There was one thing getting you through it, one thing you kept in sight as your motivation to Friday.

Recently, Aaron Hotchner had finally asked you out, after months of pining from both of you. This Friday wouldn’t be your first date, but then again, the butterflies he gave you always made it feel like the first time. He’d planned a whole movie night while Jack was away at a sleepover, complete with pizza, popcorn, wine, and dessert. A thought lingered in the back of your mind though; you hoped the two of you wouldn’t be watching much of any movie, too enveloped in each other to be paying attention to the screen.

Quitting time had finally rolled around, the office mostly empty. Other than Aaron, of course, the workaholic. His desk lamp still shone through the open blinds in his office. A smirk grew on your lips as you ascended the staircase leading to his office, knocking softly on the door.

“Agent Hotchner, can I see you a moment?”, you called softly from the other side, teasing him with his authoritative rank. You heard him let out a deep chuckle from the other side; he knew your voice all too well.

“Come in, (Y/L/N).”, he replied, using your last name to play along. The two of you usually called each other by your first names, when not in an extremely professional setting, of course. You opened the door, entering the room and then shutting it quietly behind you. He looked up from his work, a smile on his face, and beckoned you over with two fingers, sending butterflies roaring in your stomach.

You pulled the blinds shut, knowing full well any remaining agents in the office would be aware of what’s happening behind closed doors and blinds, despite them being closed. The sound of your heels carried in the room as you walked over, an ever growing smile on your lips. You sat on his desk in front of him, running your hand through his hair.

“Happy to see me, (Y/N)?”, he asked, knowing the answer, as he rose from his office chair and wrapped his arms around your waist, lips pressing a kiss to yours like it was instinct. Which it kind of was, at this point.

You laughed, then sighed. “It’s been a long ass day, Aaron. A lot of paperwork.” You knew it was nothing compared to his workload; the boss always had more to do than everyone else. But you, along with the rest of the team, knew he could handle it. Even if he needed a break, he’d push himself. Well, tonight, you’d be pulling him from his work for a well deserved break.

“Don’t I know it. Ready to get out of here?”, he asked in a voice you’d almost classify as sultry, accompanied by a look in his eyes you couldn’t quite place. You smiled nonetheless, knowing his intentions to be very good.

“Absolutely, sir.”, you said with a chipper tone, saluting him as you stood from the desk. He rolled his eyes and laughed, placing his hands on your cheeks. He kissed your lips with a bit of need, which you had for him as well, so it didn’t bother you at all.

After you’d both gathered your things and tied up loose ends for the day, you headed to the elevator. The two of you tried to keep your relationship a secret at the start, but it was too hard for both of you. Plus, it was a little noticeable by a group of profilers when you left and arrived within minutes of each other every day.

The ride to Aaron’s place was short, and you were ready to kick off your heels and enjoy that wine. And maybe enjoy your company, too.

Aaron unlocked the door, throwing his jacket and briefcase on the couch. You did the same. He headed to the kitchen for the wine, calling out at you to make yourself at home. You were about to slide your heels off when his phone rang. Immediately, you could tell in his tone something was off.

“What happened, is he alright?”, you heard him ask. You hurried into the kitchen to stand at his side, placing a hand on his arm. He mouthed something to you: ‘It’s Jack’. Your heart sank. You loved that little boy, despite not knowing him or Aaron for very long; the Hotchner boys held a special place in your heart. You waited in silence to hear the problem.

A voice spoke hurriedly on the other end, but you couldn’t exactly make out what they were saying. Aaron’s dark brows furrowed on his forehead. You could practically watch his gears turn as he processed whatever he was being told.

“Okay. I’ll be over soon.” With that, he ended the call. He explained to you that Jack had gotten sick while at his friend’s house; he wasn’t feeling well and he felt feverish, begging his friend’s mom to call Aaron. “I have to go pick him up, but if you want to go home then-“ You cut him off.

“No, no, Aaron, I wouldn’t dream of it. I want to stay, help with Jack. Make sure he’s alright.” He smiled at your words, placing a kiss to your forehead. No way would Aaron attest to having more time with you. Quickly, the two of you headed out the door to get Jack.

After arriving at the friend’s house, you waited in the passenger seat while Aaron went inside. You chewed at the inside of your cheek, leg shaking with anxiety. You hoped Jack would be okay. Hotch came out soon afterwards, Jack in his arms along with his little overnight bag. He was wearing his little pajamas already, arms wrapped tight around his dad’s neck. You jumped out of the car and opened the back door for Aaron, and he mumbled a ‘thank you’. Once Jack was situated in his seat, Aaron pulled back, about to shut the door when Jack looked up at you with those big brown eyes. The eyes that always reminded you of Aaron’s.

“Miss (Y/N)?”, he asked in a small voice. You smiled, heart warming at the sound of your name coming from him.

“Hi buddy. Wanna go home and watch some movies? Maybe eat some soup?”, you asked him, holding his little hand. He quickly reciprocated, squeezing your hand. He nodded eagerly. You smiled, squeezing his hand one more time before Aaron shut the door.

“Thanks for staying. It really means a lot, to both of us.” Aaron said to you, his gaze wandering to his son inside.

“Are you kidding? I wouldn’t wanna be anywhere else on a Friday evening. Movie night with my boys.”, you replied, a huge grin on your face. Aaron’s lips mirrored yours, the smile spreading to his eyes. He kissed you, with the most love you’d ever felt from anyone. You could get used to this.

-

self spon for my aaron hotchner playlist (i’m very proud of it) enjoy loves! <3

[tunnelofdusk]

fanfic: MDZS, Jin Ling's & Lan Sizhui's first (inadvertent) playdate.

In one moment Jiang Cheng pauses to whisper-shout at a person, and in the next moment, he loses a toddler. Ever since Jin Ling learned to walk, it's been hell on earth for Jiang Cheng, who cannot help but see danger at every corner. Jin Ling has 2 modes of walking: a snail's pace that leaves him clinging to his jiujiu's robe hem and a rapid run that more often than not leaves him tumbling head over body. Jin Ling has clearly decided to run across the tranquil Cloud Recesses.

While Jiang Cheng panics, Jin Ling totters his way into a courtyard. He is a little violet plum in a sea of white dumplings as young Lan disciples walk to their next class or settle down near the trees for a break. His mouth quivers as he looks at all these unfamiliar faces.

"Baby!" Lan Jingyi gasps to his companion.

Lan Yuan follows the direction of Lan Jingyi's gaze to where a toddler in purple robes abruptly settles on the ground, probably in for a long cry. "Baby," Lan Yuan agrees, and he tugs on Jingyi's hand to drag him over to the baby.

Lan Yuan and Lan Jingyi are big boys, so they have to be nice to babies and old people. It's their re-spon-si-bil-i-ty.

"No crying, baby," Lan Jingyi awkwardly comforts when they settle on the ground with the baby.

The baby's big eyes only water more.

Lan Yuan lets out a gusty sigh and clumsily pats the baby's head. "Be good," he says.

The baby starts crying, & Lan Yuan & Lan Jingyi trade panicked glances. Then they glance furtively at their surroundings for a grownup. They find no one else but other young curious disciples.

Lan Yuan decides to reach forward. He wraps his arms around the baby's chubby torso and plops him in his lap. Lan Yuan almost falls backward! This baby is so heavy! Surely, he didn't used to be as round as this baby is!

The baby stops crying.

"White-gege," Jin Ling squeaks out in surprise. He squints suspiciously at the two boys in white; he ignores the way his buildup of tears trickle down his cheeks.

A white sleeve pats at his cheeks, drying them and squishing his cheeks around. Jin Ling bats at them irritably.

"Like a kitty," Lan Jingyi mumbles.

Jin Ling straightens up. He knows that word! "Meow," he says.

"Meow," Lan Yuan repeats.

"Meow," Lan Jingyi says just to be a part of the moment.

Jin Ling knows this game! He tumbles out of the boy's lap onto his fours. "Mrrow!" he hisses.

Lan Jingyi raises his eyebrows, impressed at the ferocity in that hiss. "Good kitty," he says. Then he pauses. "Bad kitty!"

Jin Ling hisses again, and Lan Yuan pauses for a moment. "Arf arf," he decides.

"Good dog," Lan Jingyi declares.

"Meow!" Jin Ling squeaks.

"Arf arf!"

And this is how Jiang Cheng stumbles upon a dog, a cat, and their owner.

inspired by the way me and my cousin were younger would pretend that her younger sister was a dog...she really barked the whole day and crawled around Loudly crying face

[1ddiscourseoftheday]

Thurs 4 Feb ‘21

Confirmation is here at last of Harry’s role in the film adaptation of My Policeman, brought to us by queer fave Greg Berlanti (and his husband). Harry will costar with Emma Corrin, who you may remember from the at the time inexplicable seeming Harry/Emma cross promo last August-- given the pains they took then to emphasize that the relationship was platonic, one assumes this film will go for a different promo tactic than the current one! They share a stylist though, so they’ll no doubt be beautifully coordinated. Harry will play Tom, which some people object to on the grounds that Harry is the wrong person to play the role of a closeted man which is certainly… one opinion. Aaaaand there’s plenty more of that discourse (and about him playing a policeman) to come over the coming months so I’ll just leave it there for now! Anyway and as for that current project, we got more DWD set pics today, featuring Harry in various costume outfits! There’s ones where his character looks bloodied, and ones where his character looks clean but absolutely terrifying, grown up frat boy from hell looks to give you CHILLS, plus some of Harry as Harry in a bright orange hoodie designed by his friend Kunichi Nomura.There was also {moustache spoilers} some weird facial hair on display. Okay then!

Project Defenseless has been launched to push Defenseless up in the streaming charts and push for radio play! The fan single project offers resources and organized pushes to get people streaming and promoting on all the platforms and reaching out to radio, and has fans making lots of very cool edits besides! “I see what you’re doing with defenseless! You are all incredible!” said Louis. That song is such a fitting choice for this kind of project! Its journey has been all about the fan response from back when Louis played it for us for the very first time in 2019 (it was the one everyone was screaming about from soundcheck clips for the few hours between that and hearing the songs for real even) and afterwards he told us about how although he’d always liked the song it clicked for him in a new way after getting the fan reaction, saying “something happened to it when I performed it live, and ever since then it really kind of got me,” and “the fans make everything sound amazing, they made it sound so good,” and “the fans for whatever reason really took to this song, so now it has a special place in me heart definitely”. Plus of course there was the long saga of fan stress when it seemed like it might not be on the album and rejoicing when Louis finally definitively confirmed that it would be, after what seemed like might have been a reversal on his part due to the outcry about it. And now she’s climbing all kinds of charts like a the star she is! The song shot up on itunes (#3 worldwide, #1 in 16 countries) just for starters and the project has only just got going. Louis commented on the stats-- “An album track off an album that’s a year old. You lot blow my fucking mind! Thank you so much!”

Louis also commented on a Jack Saunders (BBC indie music DJ) tweet and followed guitarist Johnny Took of the DMAs on twitter which is weird only in that he didn’t already.

There’s news about Zayn’s Zach Sang interview, and it’s not the most surprising news but it is very sad; Zach says “hi beautiful humans, this convo was scheduled for last week but we got a rain check from his team. this conversation can still happen, it ain’t over yet! we’ll keep ya in the loop. I listened to this album 7 times! we’re determined” Well... damn. However Zayn DID pop up with some spon-content but like… the WEIRDEST ad content?? It’s for Coors Light and, well I’ll let Zayn tell you about it! “They’re gonna see if they can put a commercial inside your dreams... which is kind of messed up.” HAHAHAHA I have nothing to add! What Zayn said!!! “So we’re gonna give that a go and uh see if it works,” he says, sounding appropriately skeptical, followed by “wish me luck”. Does this kind of sponcon count as malicious compliance? Technically he DID say the stuff he was supposed to- and he’s doing an instagram live for them Sat, supposedly. I can’t wait to see how that goes! Wish him luck! The latest installment of the NIL comic book video series is also out today, but just one this time instead of a pair. This week’s song is Connexion and the new comic shows us that the figure pursuing our hero is, drumroll-- himself! The call is coming from inside the house!

Unlike interview shy Zayn, however, Gigi is out there ready to overshare, as long as it’s to Vogue. She has plenty to say about giving birth to zaby Khai (newly revealed nickname: Khaiba) at home at the Pennsylvania farm. The article says that they decided to have the birth at home due to COVID placing restrictions on hospital births that would have prevented Bella and Zayn and Yolanda all being present, and after she and Zayn watched the documentary The Business of Being Born. “They placed a blow-up bath in their bedroom and sent their three cats and border collie away when the midwife expressed concern that the sphynx and Maine coon felines might puncture the tub with their claws,” the interviewer learns while horseback riding with Gigi. The article also says Zayn “caught the baby” but it isn’t a direct quote from Gigi and I’m thinking a bit of an exaggeration perhaps. Gigi had the baby at the Hadid family farm but she and Zayn have since relocated to live at his farm, which is nearby, where they say they will be raising the child, with Z’s mom Trisha coming to stay to help out for the first month, that Khai sleeps with them, and that Zayn said his experience of the whole thing reminded him of the birth in a lion documentary they’d watched. Neither mentioned it but it has been spotted that Gigi and Zayn each now have tattoos of the name, Khai, in Arabic.

Meanwhile, Niall surfaced only in golf guy mode- a Modest Golf announcement and a podcast appearance to promote the new Modest initiative to get young people into playing golf. He says they want to “get rid of that thing that’s been holding golf back for a long time, that it’s a boring sport…” and I know he means he’s trying to combat that idea but when I tell you I LAUGHED!