#my childhood was personally attacked
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I just found out James and Jessie from Team Rocket ( pokemon) are NOT siblings?? Wtf
#someone said they marry each other in the end#WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK#ive know pokemon since i was a little kid#ill grant u i never played it or watched it all but my siblings did and every time i saw the rocket team i thought they were siblings#i NEVER questioned that#for me it was an universal truth#and now i find out theyre what??? fRiEndS??!!!LoVErs ??????!!!!!!!!!!!!!#my childhood was personally attacked#pokemon#team rocket#prepare for trouble and make it double#THEY ARE SIBLINGS UR HONOR I SWEAR THEY R
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can we please stop with the ‘Mickey is objectively a bad person’ shit PLEASE.
I get it comes from a place of holding him accountable for his actions which is fair but going straight to “he’s a bad person” just completely disregards so much of his growth and development, and the nuances of the show.
I get Mickey fans got a reputation in the past for excusing everything he does and yea that’s annoying. But to counteract that by saying “he’s objectively terrible!” is so one dimensional and also completely goes against everything that shameless is about.
the point of shameless isn’t that all of these people are terrible, it’s to show the effect living in poverty has on a person and the lengths that are necessary to go to survive in that life, and the mistakes that ultimately causes people to make along the way.
no shameless character is perfect. that’s the point. even some of the worst things that characters have done have been because they are victims of their circumstances and situations. they are nuanced complex characters that can’t be put into boxes of good and bad
they’ve all done things to hurt other people and themselves. but the point is is that most of them have good within them, but all the factors against them make it harder to let that out.
“He’s a bad person” is a lazy reading of the show that completely lacks nuance in my opinion
#I’m so sick of seeing this#he’s not an angel. but he’s not evil#SHOCKER that’s kind of the whole point of the fucking show#idk what the fandom used to be like but I get the impression that Mickey was over excused#and then now because of that certain blogs have taken it upon themselves to attack mickey fans because of that#and their go to argument is that he’s a bad person#like. you were so close to the point!!#blocked people bc I was so sick of seeing this bullshit and now it’s on my tik tok#anyway if anyone tried to say ian was objectively a bad person everyone would be up in arms#rightfully so because he’s not#he’s made mistakes and fucked up many times#like every other character in the show#but he’s not a bad person#people are nuanced an grey!!#shocker!!#mickey milkovich#shameless#idk why everyone is so obsessed with putting people into a box of good or bad#that’s so fucking boring#if ur reading this this isn’t about u btw#anyone I’ve seen who is truly angry about Mickey fans being overly defensive of him#are really just angry when other people view Mickey the same way those people view ian#instead of taking into account how both of their circumstances affected their actions#I said what I said#that’s literally it#I saw a comment that was like#Mickey fans will always talk about how his childhood was a reason for his actions but not Ian’s#while they actively do that very thing to Mickey#it’s literally the height of hypocrisy#just do it for both of them it’s not difficult
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yeah natori is 23 and since matoba is one year younger, he's 22 at the very start of the manga/anime :))) i think it was like around season 3 of natsume when i learned this and went ????????????? and had to go lie down for a while
unacceptable. midorikawa-sensei answer for your crimes. the thing that's killing me currently is i know i learned this information back when i read a bunch of fic after watching the show for the first time - which was less than a year ago - but apparently REPRESSED IT because it was sooo does not compute. and then had to learn it all over again just recently. my poor brain tried so hard to protect me from this knowledge but alas.
FREE THEM they're baby adults they should not have this kind of weight on their shoulders and have like. employees and shit!!! "oh look a dumbass teenager with a heart of gold. how about i protect him with my life" HOW ABOUT YOU WORRY ABOUT YOURSELF YOU MAN-SIZED CATERPILLAR!!! they need to be in their cocoon era not in their head-of-the-family life-and-death-decision-making era. when you're 22 you're legally obligated to make questionable life choices and it seems self-evident you should not have to be forming lifelong contracts with supernatural beings until after you've gotten some of that out of your system but WHAT DO I KNOW, i'm just a thirtysomething with over a decade on natori who still does the modern-day equivalent of unplugging my answering machine so people can't leave me cursed voicemails. i look back on my 23yo self and i want to cry from how much she was learning and how hard she was trying. i love her so much it breaks my heart. stop putting these young men into situations they need to be in situations but maybe ones less fraught with mortal consequences. maybe some situations more along the lines of figuring out the hard way not to buy dryclean-only shirts because who has time to go to the drycleaners? that's just one idea, i've got more of these. midorikawa-sensei are you listening??
#i just rewatched the arc where natori and natsume free takuma-san's shiki#and lost it at the part where natori is like takuma-san what am i gonna do with this kid? he's giving me daily heart attacks#and takuma just starts laughing like ahhh now it's your turn#now you know what it's like mr. former teenager not listening to your elders!!!!#natsume's book of friends#natsume yuujinchou#asks#not anon#natori shuuichi#f#matoba seiji#horrible exorcists#my mom was 22 when she had me and whenever i think about that i'm just like TWENTY-TWO? TWENTY-TWO???#TWENTY-TWO YEARS OLD? TWENTY-TWO???????#this actually helped me a lot in coming to terms with my childhood. like she was doing her best she was just#twenty fucking two#like my mom was in a sense making head-of-the-family life-and-death decisions#and making a lifelong contract (to be the parent of a person she was creating) at age 22#and just to be clear i also want to go lie down when i think about that#that is a real thing that happened and i'm not saying she was too young to have the right to make that kind of major decision#i'm just saying it makes me want to drag my fingernails down my face in agony#much like learning natori shuuichi is supposed to be 23. like nooooooo
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not bob duncan from good luck charlie guest starring on 9-1-1 and getting a nail gun to the heart 😭
#i feel like my childhood just got personally attacked#poor bob#don’t tell the kids about that one#bob duncan#eric allan kramer#911 show#911 season 3#911 abc#911 fox#em watches 911#em saying things
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The worst part of being trans on an English course is listening to people give Harry Potter a verbal tongue bath cuz it’s an ‘amazing and well crafted piece of literature’ prefaced of course by a completely vapid ‘fuck JK Rowling’ to show they are in fact… An AllyTM
But if you dissent from the popular opinion of 20 somethings who stubbornly refuse to move on from their childhood obsession or take off their nostalgia glasses and you dare to argue that actually on just about every level Harry Potter is kind of boring, uninventive and thoroughly uncompelling as anything other than indulgent wish fulfilment?
Then they look at you like you just spat in their face.
Anyway Fuck JKR AND Harry Potter! No death of the authoring your way out of this one 😒
#it’s not great literature#that’s just my opinion#obvs#but so is the opinion that it is#cuz arts subjective like that#(also I’m not trying to attack your pwecious childhood memowies ok#what you got out of the story is perfectly valid#but learn to take criticism of it ok)#fuck jkr#fuck harry potter#english student#english literature#fake allies#personal#rant#tinkerbitchspeaks
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spacing out during finals, and imagined a scenario where childhood s/o and aki are in elementary school- a kid trips little s/o in the mud and little aki gets them back by sticking gum in their hair (╥﹏╥) cause bro really be doing that fr 💀
anon... don't get me started... my heart has been yearning so much for childhood friends with aki these days.......
and he would totally do that too, young aki would pick a fight with anyone who bullies you or makes you cry. when he gets a little older, he's actually quite intimidating to the rest of the students, so just sticking with him is enough to ensure no-one tries to mess with you. he'll always make an effort to include you even when everyone else isn't; you're practically stuck together like glue, and even though any rumors about the two of you barely ever reach your ears, you're sure they've noticed how you and aki are rarely seen apart from one another.
#childhood friends with aki where you and aki are best friends since you were kids and simultaneously each other's only friends#I always imagined that people would often treat aki like an outcast#the gun devil attack is such a touchy subject#the other students just see him as weird and rude and unapproachable#so you end up as really the only person he trusts enough to confide in#it's also pretty obvious he's training to become a devil hunter#which kind of makes people scared of him lol#aaaauuuuuuuu I wanna write about this so bad#I think I'll start working on it when I'm done with my current long fic#I have a billion thoughts in my brain about this I could really go on and on forever about this au#just... being childhood friends with aki since the two of you were little kids#knowing everything he's been through and witnessing it all with your own eyes#the struggle between his desire to become a devil hunter#and you being the only thing he has left and the one person he cares about the most#and just.... when he leaves.... but then... when you finally meet again....#and so many things are different.... he went through so much and threw his life away over and over again#but he still has that same old soft spot for you#I'm going to go insaaaaaneeee!!!!#ask mags
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whenever i get the urge to delete my old art off the face of the internet i remind myself of the artists who deleted their beautiful art that inspired me so much. i exist purely to spite their decision
#Cause you know one persons trash is another persons lifelong source of joy and wonder#the devastation i felt when one of my favorite artists whom id been admiring from afar had deleted their entire acc was unbearable#its happened like five times at this point. i genuinely loved their styles so much and one day they all just. boom. half of my childhood go#when you make fanart in a fandom with like 10 people newbies WILL look at your art from 5 years ago and cry#theyve been wandering in a barren desert waiting for rain that will never come.. your art is like an oasis to them man#whyd they delete them they were the bestest things id ever seen and now theyre nowhere (bawling) curse you talented person i do not know#AND thats why i dont take down my old art.. because i would not wish that fate on my worst enemy#Every time you delete your art your 12 year old secret admirer from across the globe has a heart attack#incoherent ramblings#does this fall into the vent category or the tragic artist backstory category
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Personal rant
Having a therapist (a therapist!!!!) tell me I can't possibly be depressed because my family doesn't suck, and then implying the doctors are naïve or stupid for not finding something physically wrong with me... My dude, are you so sure that they have "insurance coverage only" bias? Cause seems like YOU have psychodynamic brain rot to me.
#mental health#therapy#personal rant#seriously FUCK neofreudianism#i'm allowed to have panic attacks about things that aren't my parents or early childhood if my brain fucking well decides it will
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it's fodder for excellent drama but let's admit it, hush and war games and identity crisis and under the red hood all happening in relatively close succession is insanely funny. just bruce speedrunning the worst fucking 365 days of his life. they should release a compilation book of all four and just title it 'batman and the terrible horrible no good very bad year'
#personal#can you imagine being bruce and having to explain this after the fact to literally anyone#'yeah so an old childhood friend systematically attacked me and left me even more paranoid and damaged my relationship with my gf and kids'#'and also tormented me with a fake version of my murdered son whose death i still grieve and feel responsible for'#'and then my sidekick triggered a gang war but was tortured and murdered in the process and my only mother figure is kinda responsible'#'and my allies have all been alienated from me in gotham and meanwhile my friends in the justice league kinda mindraped me and are lying'#'which is ratcheting up my paranoia and my OTHER sidekick's dad died which i failed to stop'#'oh and that dead son? he came back to life and he fucking hates me and he's a criminal now and wants me to kill his murderer'#'so that's my 2005 wrap up anyway'#also i think under the red hood is immediately followed by yet another fucking crisis event where bludhaven got blown tf up#exploded into complete smithereens which like#goddamn no wonder bruce took a year long vacation after all of this shit worst fucking year of his life probably
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Save me Cats the Musical
Cats the Musical
Cats the Musical save me
#OUGH I LOVE THIS THING#the movie actually attacked me personally they made one of my childhood crushes taylor swift
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not my stepdad saying that i used to belittle him as a child by using big words 😭 and that I was smart but had no common sense. I said it's the autism and he was like "no it's not that" 😭😭😭😭
#sir what do you mean i belittled you i was a child?#i promise using big words and being socially incompetent as an undiagnosed autistic kid wasnt a personal attack on ur intelligence <3#you know when youre in the car with your parents and immediately take psychic damage#he's saying as kids me and my siblings all instigated and acted like he was a bad person#my dude we were children and you the parent what else do u expect kids think their parents are mean and unfair thats the childhood/teenage#experience in a nutshell#i guarantee me telling him everything he did wrong to me as a child would not go down as well#but i must answer for the sins of my childhood#dogbunni diary log#some bullshit
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I just remembered the time I began having panic attacks at night, when I was a teenager... and how I always wanted my parents to help me, and while they did, they still reminded me that I was just getting in the way. That they needed to go to work the next day, that they can't keep going out of their way to help me.
I get so angry nowadays, because... Mom, Dad. I got fucked up like this BECAUSE OF YOU. You can't fucking pretend that this has nothing to do with you. You BROKE me and you REFUSED to take responsibility. Instead, you just left me alone like you always do, and you make me feel GUILTY and regretful for even seeking out for help in the first place.
"But they have their own lives to get through!" I am. Literally their daughter. And worse, I was still a MINOR at the time (and mentally ill adults like me still deserve to feel safe!!!!), so I don't fucking care about THEIR poor little lives. It was never about me this whole fucking time.
So yeah. I am fucking angry, and I will continue to be angry, because THIS. IS NOT. FAIR.
#trauma#childhood trauma#cptsd#actuallybpd#actuallyanxious#actuallybipolar#panic attack tw#caps tw#emotional neglect#emotional abuse#venting#personal#my journal
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going insane thinking about how taissa is both the wolf that ripped van's face off and the woman who killed the wolf that ripped her face off
#she's the wolf!!!!#shes the one that got her attacked. she bit her hard enough to draw blood. shes having visions of the wolves. shes following a-#-manifestation of her inner desires and hunting her down and planting herself at her side. shes wearing her clothes.#and VAN.... the devotion.... the fraughtness... the lovelovelove but being caught in following someone else someone with answers and power..#WOOF!#I got werewolf brain of course I like the wolf dykes#theyre the same animal in different kinds of stories okay!!!!!!! Im obsessed!!!!#personal#yellowjackets /#I watched it. every time van did something at all wolfy I screamed to myself#also shout out to the fact that I didnt recognise christina ricci despite her being my childhood celebrity crush. wild.#EDIT also also thinking about van telling the story of the wilderness. she knows what story theyre in!!!! she knows about the narrative!!!!
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Nothing like some light substance abuse to really make you feel like a child again
#me sitting in my room shaking in silence after turning all my lights off quickly and locking my bedroom door and holding my breath as my#mother turns the light on outside to let the dog out and the light between the blinds comes pouring into my rook#on the carpet I see her shadow as she walks past#minutes feel like hours as I wait for her to sulk away back to her cave. I open my bedroom door to sneak away to the bathroom and the light#from the kitchen is visible in the hallway. this feels like a personal attack when you’re a child sneaking around in the late hours. it#feels like we’re two mountain lions claiming territory in this house and you are cornering me in my bedroom just like when I was a child#I am typing this from under three blankets layered over each other to hide the light from my screen (with reduced white point) just in case#my mother walks outside near my window or near my bedroom door.#I feel so connected to my childhood self right now. sitting in the dark room with the only light coming from one window with the blinds draw#n. just the outline of each individual blind. and the light pouring in from under a locked bedroom door. if she knocks you have to answer.#if you don’t answer she will unlock it herself. locks never meant privacy in my home. I remember that clearly.#there was a lock on my childhood bedroom in my house in Maine. locked from the outside not the inside. they could lock me in but I couldn’t#lock anyone out. to be fair I had a habit of getting up in the middle of the night sneaking to the kitchen and eating slices of processed#individually wrapped cheese slices while watching horrifying shows like oobi and the fucking one with the band of four ppl they were all a#different colored instrument#idk anyways. there was a lock on my bedroom on the outside and I remember waking up in the morning before anyone else and playing in my room#and reading and waiting for like a half an hour every morning for someone to wake up and decide they had the energy to come deal with me#so that’s fun. undiagnosed adhd core.#coming out of whatever high trance I just had where I was connected to all of that childhood terror of being seen by my mother. I was afraid#of being caught even though I was doing nothing wrong. I was constantly afraid of something I did not have any reason to be afraid of.#it felt like at any moment I could be wrong place wrong timed with my mother and suddenly feel like the worst person ever. and I’m sure that#demanded a lot of attention and made her pull away from dealing with me I mean she had just lost her job and was running her own business#now and she was stressed and broke and trying to keep it together and I’m sure I was running around under her feet or my brother and I were#arguing but idk I just feel like I don’t remember anything from my childhood and what I do remember is being afraid of everything and is#that some emotional thing or is that just I have been anxious my entire life and no one cared until I was literally trying to kill my sled#self fucking autocorrect#anyways.#I think my mother has gone to bed so I’m going to slink into my own bathroom and maybe throw up a little 👍 I am excited to see what the fuck#I wrote here when I reread it tomorrow
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#meme#mattsmemes#memes that make you go hmmm#accurate#personally attacked#well excuse me#100% accurate#childhood memories#adulting is hard#pay my bills
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