#my body is fucking ready
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jaime turning women down constantly more bc he is very monogamous and in love with someone else right now for the first time and is also kinda scared of actually having sex with someone other than cersei is sm better to me than “i respect the kg vows of chastity so intensely rn actually because i changed into a good and serious person” or whatever lol
#i truly dgaf about that bffr jaime dude#like its a stupid vow that says nothing about u as a person lmfao#him in the bath with pia thinking of brienne like u r not fooling anybody honestly#like i truly do think its more copium and not being honest with himself tbfh#like he had a rationalization when pia came into his bed in asos too but then it was purely ‘i only love cers i would never’#and with cat it was so funny when he bluffing and was like uh i cant marry bc of my vows but i could still service u😉😉#he would have pissed himself if he was called on that bluff but only bc he would be cheating on cers and have sex with another woman#man that fucked his twins in a sept next to his sons dead body the moment he returned caring about chastity vows#his development isnt really about keeping every vow ever when most of it is fraudery anyway#like pls he is not keeping his vow to his king rn really 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭#i think the vows and respecting them has a deeper meaning thats the whole point which ones do u keep and prioritize and why#like weve been thru this 80x being a real vowhead is not what makes u a good person 😭#deleting ur individuality and personal life to be an honorpillhead lol#the vow to cat has meaning the elite bodyguard vow to never fuck has zero meaning 😭#he was ready to break the no marriage vow w cers pls#im not saying this bc of a shipper endgame in mind i find volcel jaime hilarious its just i dont like it as proof of his development#like ill be real guys sex positive warrior gurm is not pushing the idea that keeping ur chastity vows is what honor is about#like i get that he wants to be better and he is figuring out what that really means but
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Queer as Folk – 3.12: Drugs, Sex and Lies
#britin#queer as folk#cinematv#filmtvcentral#userthing#smallscreensource#userrlaura#userange#alielook#mlmsource#usergay#chewieblog#dailyflicks#userstream#tvarchive#filmtvtoday#usersource#userblorbo#justin's like 'the audacity! the fuck you did there's a streetlight out there that begs to differ' he's ready to throw hands if needs be#his body language is so funny pls ily#3x12#my gifs
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Its been a while since I updated this little project but heres the dealio. I got "mysteriously" sick for the last 2 months and it kinda halted my work on getting this thing physically printed. BUT IM BACK and ready to start this up again. I'm really hoping i get everything done by Jan. or very latest feb (mostly anticipating for holiday slow down)
In the meantime i got a few questions on my interest check asking if i would offer a digital version of the zine. and the answer 2 months late is YES I WILL YOU CAN GET IT NOW ACTUALLY ON MY GUMROAD OR KO-FI HURRRAYYYYYY!!!! 🥳🥳 GO CHECK IT OUT ITS $3
GUMROAD | KO-FI
#the art of a lemon wedge#homumiko#baroryuu#otasune#feel like a fucking#victorian woman in a novel the way i got sick for no reason those months#vertigo. brain fog. parts of my body would go tingley. and for 2-3 hours at a random time of the day my entire body would just feel BAD#idk else how to describe it cause it was not pain#i could not predict what would trigger those 2-3 hours of BAD and it seemed to change every day#and then some days i wouldnt get them but i would still get vertigo and brain fog whenever i would go to bed#anyways#IT WAS THE WATER#STUPID LA WATER BLEH BLEH#I WENT TO TEXAS TO VISIT FAM FOR A WEEK AND ALL MY SYMPTOMS WENT AWAY#-_-#and now im on a strict distilled/purified bottle water diet#i cant even eat food thats been boiled in whatever the hell gets put into the gallons at the store.....sigh#BUT IM BETTER#and ready to get back into it#:D
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WIP WEDNESDAY
Rewriting what was the old chapter 22 of TBBW (1920s Dance, Woo Woo!) and the last half, the klaroline half, has become a chapter all on its own. It's really building up to be one of my favourite chapters in the entire fic, and it's partly because I read @kirythestitchwitch's Crash Course which made me crave a cheeseburger so badly I wrote it into this fic. So here's a sneak peak --- don't let the fluff fool you, this chapter has its fair share of angst hehehe
“You know, I’m really surprised you didn’t insist on paying,” Caroline commented, unwrapping the paper around her cheeseburger as she settled back on the bonnet of Klaus’ car.
Klaus sat beside her, unwrapping his own burger as he stretched his legs out in front of him, one leg hanging off the side and resting on the upwards curve of the rim that snaked above the front wheels. Caroline leant back against the glass of the windscreen, relaxing into her spot as the sweet, steaming smell of the burger hit her — two seasoned patties topped with melted slices of creamy, cheesy goodness calling out to her from their package in a perfectly toasted, soft sesame seed bun, stuffed with crisp, curly lettuce and slices of fresh tomato. Up above, the light pollution from Mystic Falls was less intense so far away from the town, parked outside a quiet diner just off the Jackson highway. The stars were beginning to peak out from behind the clouds, the moon a quarter-full and shining down on them from the night sky above. Behind them, the warm glow of the diner spilled out onto the parking lot, employees wiping down tables and serving the odd exhausted truck driver behind the glass, like one gigantic, square-shaped fish bowl. The neon lights of the diner’s name, Wayback Burgers, flashed and flickered in the dark, reflecting red and blue light onto the wet pavement.
“And why’s that?” Klaus asked, licking his thumb where the various condiments and sauces had leaked out of his large, triple stacked bacon cheeseburger and onto his hand. She’d felt weird ordering him nothing at the drive thru after she’d asked for the cheeseburger and fries, impulsively buying a milkshake to wash it all down with too. So she’d turned to him and asked if he’d wanted anything, and with some hesitancy, he’d ordered one of the meatiest burgers on the menu.
It was weird. The choice prodded something in her brain, seeming familiar. It was only when they got their burgers, Klaus eyeing his with a hunger that looked out of place on a vampire, that she realised why.
Tyler always ordered the meatiest thing on the menu too. Burgers, ribs, steak, chicken wings — it didn’t matter where they bought lunch, if there was an option to eat like a hungry pack of hyenas, he’d take it. Klaus had slightly more decorum, but the look was exactly the same.
“I don’t know. Aren’t you supposed to be ancient?” she shot at him, setting the wrapping in her lap and taking her first bite of her burger. She sighed in bliss the moment the taste hit her tongue — it was truly a magnificent burger. The patties were seasoned to perfection, falling apart in her mouth, cheese melted onto them. The tomatoes and lettuce were fresh but not soggy, and the pickles buried beneath it all had an acid tang that balanced the whole thing out. “Old people are always moaning chivalry is dead,” she finished, holding a hand up to cover her mouth as she spoke around her food.
“And I seemed like the type?” he asked, glancing at her with a raised brow. His voice dropped to a dry drawl. “Why? Because I’m old or because I’m dead?”
She grinned, cheeks full of food. “Both,” she informed him happily, before chewing the last of it and swallowing. Klaus grunted, finally taking a bite out of his burger. Like her, he seemed to melt into the taste, some of the tension in his shoulders easing. She shrugged, eyeing him consideringly before turning her gaze back to her burger, folding down the wrapping. “Most guys get weird when I offer to pay.”
Tyler normally did. Matt had. Since both boys were on opposite sides of the financial spectrum, she kinda figured it wasn’t because of the money.
He looked at her then, searching her face for something. He swallowed his food before he spoke. “Did you want me to pay?”
She shook her head. “No. It was my idea to drag you out here. And you’re giving me a lift home after my car broke down even though I’ve rejected you like, a bajillion times. Least I could do was buy you a burger,” she teased, smile strained.
They hadn’t spoken about it, on the drive here. This thing between them; his jealousy towards Tyler and cruel actions earlier that night; the dozens of hesitant advances, if unwanted on her part. They weren’t friends.
Problem was, Caroline wasn’t sure if they were enemies either.
Enemies didn’t show each other their personal artwork or unfinished sketches that were hidden away from even their family’s prying eyes. Enemies didn’t sit on a public bench and discuss lost dreams. And they certainly didn’t buy burgers at drive-thrus and eat them together under the starlit sky.
Klaus sighed, but didn’t seem offended. “I don’t think it was quite a bajillion times.”
“Yet,” she corrected cheekily, taking a big bite into her burger.
Instead of the scowl she expected, Klaus smiled fondly, following her lead and taking a bite too.
#klaroline#klaus x caroline#klaroline fanfiction#klaroline wip wed#the big bad wolf#tbbw#1920s#1920s decade dance#klaus mikaelson#caroline forbes#morningstar writes#this chapter is my eureka moment#this one fucking scene is setting up so much character development I swear to god#this is the start of caroline trusting klaus#this is the start of her falling in love with him#are you guys fucking ready?#LET'S GOOOOOOOOOOOO#sneak peak#tbbw spoilers#and yes there is a nighthawks reference in there#edward hopper's aesthetics have betwitched me body and soul
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fuck it i don't even want to get better
i want to get worse
#self mutalition#i wanna cvt#cvtting addict#sh#mental illness#actually mentally ill#actually traumatized#i hate it here#styroblr#i hate this#i hate everything#i hate my body#fuck off#mentally fucked#failure#i wanna kms#im going to kms#i want to kms#kms#ready to kms#i wanna die#fml#ugh fml#haha fml#fml lmao#lol fml#fuck this#im so tired#why am i like this#so tired
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me, vibrating out of my skin: please for the love of god let people have normal, different bodies
#when will we be ready to talk about the damage done by the absolute uniformity of bodies in the entertainment industry#and asian media is not exempt from this btw#what do you mean a 10 person pop group all look like they were cut from the same cookie cutter#are u telling me the all naturally look the same? or were they... forced to?#and for every person in my real actual life who thinks that im having this visceral reaction bec of recent weight gain and body issues#i will kill you with my bare fucking hands#dumb irl stuff
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I waited years to get a Switch for Prime 4 and ITS HERE BABY! IT LOOKS SO GOOD!
The MUSIC: 💯
THE ART DIRECTION: 💯
THE FACT THAT WE SEE SHIP DESIGNS FROM PRIME 3: 💯
SYLUX: 💯
HORROR INSPIRED SPACE PIRATES: 💯
Sure it's a shame we gotta wait till next year, but baby, I've been waiting since 2017. I'm a patient bitch. METROID FANS WAKE THE FUCK UP!!! OUR HOUR IS HERE!!!
#metroid#metroid prime#metroid prime 4#samus aran#metroid prime 4 beyond#i am BEYOND excited#over the moon baby#my body is ready#i'm fucking screaming#i will be talking about this for weeks
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@fushiglow hmm….wonder who i’d draw this for all of a sudden and why… 🤔🤔
#your reblog surprised me#THREE BUNS SUGURU (STAR WARS ER JUST FOR YOU!)#theyre covering riko or smt and smuggling her places (??)#drawing this i was like ‘oh suguru’s curses in a star wars environment should be robots and stuff#so this suguru is a mecanic (he makes them from scrappy parts people have thrown out#and trash materials (and hard work 😎)#diy pokemon#because what is the cursed energy people are letting out if not junk theyre letting go of#so yeah ; basic geto takes shit and turns it useful#i do realise thats already very generic for star wars (junk robots junk robots!) but like. yknow. this guy takes shit people wouldnt bother#trying to sell. miam. junk of the junk. geto my favourite recycling bin you were designed for a luxurious lifestyle clearly (gege not me!)#(and stuff…………. but im lazy to put my vision in words rn hah..)#gojo’s probably a princess#(let’s not lie. hes basically a prince already (clan heir is a different look on him))#this made me want to write ?.??#problem is i dont remember much about star wars (watched it as a kid (we have the cds) appart from the very basic storyline… i forgot 😔#then theres the jawa’s first appearance cuz for some reason they scared me and i am marked for life (THEYRE JUST SILLY LITTLE GUYS 😭😭))#thankfully i lowkey want to rewatch everything so these issues can be fixed#(unthankfully either way the chance of me writing anything is very slim BUT WE NEVER KNOW RIGHT)#(hashtag diverging your attention from that other older post is it working /j/j)#omg glo i still didnt read balance (i think of it from time to time but im intimidated to read it because i know its right up my alley and#that i will love it and lately idk why but i need to ready myself emotionally to read peak fiction (this is so dumb but its true 😭😭))#my bad im rambling lol#WAIT FUCK SAME THING FOR BUNNY’S RECENT THINGY THAT GOT IN MY AO3 UPDATE MAIL#A LOVE STORY TOLD THROUGH THE LENS OF A THIRD PARTY MY BELOVED#(itsg ive searchef for these types of stories in advanced search before#AND NOW THAT I HAVE SOME BY AUTHORS I ALREADY ADORE .. IM- I SEE THEM BUT. THEIR CONTENTS STAY A MYSTERY. IS THIS MY BODY SUBCONSCIOUSLY FI#FIGHTING THE TEAR LOSS I WOULD GET??? IS THIS MFING [BALLING-MY-EYES-OUT] PREVENTION !? WITHOUT MY PERMISSION..!? TCH!)#my bad. ramble again o7 — see ya glo !#wip
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thinking about taking a little bit of a step back from social media for a bit for mental/physical health reasons (as in: chronic severe anxiety is causing chronic health issues and I need to remove stress Somehow). I will still post art but I’m probably gonna make an effort to engage with my dash only minimally, if at all. (that being said I have very poor discipline so if you see me suddenly reblogging stuff out of nowhere just. roll with it)
#thinking about how social media doesn’t really give you the chance to choose when you’re ready to engage with the news#like I think the most healthy thing is to decide when you’re in an okay place to sit down and deal with the news#but social media is just. constant whiplash bombardment. advertisement cat video people are dying guilt trip fashion tiktok moral dilemma#anyways. dealing with some chronic pain/gi/minor dysautonomia stuff#and it is looking like the cause is a mix of hypermobile joint issues#and the side effects of being chronically stressed out and anxious for. literally my entire life#as in night terrors as a kid insomnia since infancy panic attacks starting in middle school type chronic anxiety#turns out the body being switched into fight or flight mode Constantly does in fact. fuck things up a little bit#there’s only just starting to be research into this but from how my doc explained it my nervous system is a little bit. busted#ANYWAYS. not to overshare. point is chronic health issues caused by chronic stress equals I need to get off social media#and as a disclaimer I have been to therapy (a lot) and I am on anxiety meds but my body physically does not know how to chill out#so removing stressors it is
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Oil and water. Wasn’t meant to be
Violet von Arcane Jacket, 2021-23
Pigskin suede, lamb nappa, silk, brass
#vi#arcane#league of legends#project: Violet von arcane#cosplay#media: arcane#happy arcane season 2 day!#I haven’t watched it yet bc I had to work a sixth day and left the house bang on the release. biphobia#I am finally curled up and ready#yeah man! I started this in December 2021 after wrapping on and I finished it spring 2023!!! this jacket is my Rome my kryptonite my hextec#this is my favourite thing I’ve ever#made and I made it so overcomplicated - of course#there’s 20-something pieces in the upper body#the entire thing is cord#the lining is quilted#the leather welt pockets are EXQUISITE#I’ve also done the trousers - eventually I will finish her#I was hoping to have her done by now not anticipating working again this year past October since the industry is still fucked but I got#lucky w a really fun and big job so… sorry Violet my beloved my darling#one day#she does have her shoulder patches o just took these photos quickly and badly before I did them and here we are
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POV: You're a traitor about to learn why Lilith's called the Pheonix
#Lilith just keeps coming back#woman is intimate with death and knows roughly how long it takes to wake up again#She normally wakes up ready to rip out throats#if her body is found it is QUICKLY put into a cell where she can safely come back to herself and realize she's safe#Either that or you don't hear about for six fucking years and you randomly find her on some fucking planet#How she got there is anyone's guess#Lilith of Baal#enjoy my rambles#warhammer 40k#warhammer 30k#traitor astartes#shitpost#warhammer shitpost#meme#Imma draw this later because it's funny asf
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always appreciate when scary shit happens and I realize I'm not the freeze of fight flight freeze
#backstory: our house doesnt have security and last night i went downstairs at like 3am and i was like. hm. havent checked the back door lock#in a while. lemme double check. and it was OPEN#so i was like 🤨 and locked it#and then tonight my mom and i are watching madagascar and im standing sort of positioned behind the door and i noticed it opening#and it was opening in a way that looked like someone pushing it open and i couldnt see outside cause the light was on inside#so i threw my whole fucking body into it ready to wrestle the dude from hush#anyways it was the wind but i have no idea how the lock opened#id think we have a squatter but weve been home all day and theres really no place in our house to hide so the lock is probably just fucked#my dads only contribution to this activity was coming halfway down the stairs and going 'its the last day of mercury retrograde'
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My mantra this morning is that I am going to be so chill if I don't get VIP soundcheck tickets for this concert.
#personal#i woke up a couple hours ago and knew i wouldn't be able to go back to sleep#what is it about presale for concert/show tickets is it that sends our bodies into fight or flight#presale doesn't open for another hour and fifteen minutes#i may need to run around my house a few times#like the perimeter#to get some of this excess energy out of my body#i went and bought a new ethernet cable because we lost all of ours in the move#i'm fucking ready to fight for these tickets lol
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post-election moodboard
#been working on this for a hot while#i am still very fucking angry and recently no ones been there for me like riot grrrl#i just love living in the land of the free so much.#i love that everyone here is ready and willing to not only openly support a violently racist convicted felon and rapist#but also to put him in office as the president of my country#i love that people around who love me actively voted for my rights freedom and safety to be stripped away from me#i love that i have to fear for my friends and familys safety#we shouldve gotten to see the first female us president.#instead a lot of people are going to die at the hands of people who swore to protect them#election 2024#election.#fuck donald trump#women#female rage#girlhood#riot grrrl#edit#vent edit#political vent#feminist#chasing amy#pearl movie#anora#jennifers body#the menu#juno#everything everywhere all at once#black phone#tlou#the girl with the dragon tattoo
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Don't you love watching yourself spiral again after you thought shit might have actually been getting better??
Like you're not eating, not sleeping as much/too much, isolating yourself, crying every night, bed rotting, wondering why nobody loves you, cvtting up your thighs, spending all your time listening to music & dissociating, and have to battle the urge to end ur life every night even though you thought shit was really looking up for a minute.
I honestly just want everything to stop I hope I die in my sleep
FML
#i wanna die#i wanna kms#im going to kms#ready to kms#kill my thoughts#i wanna be perfect#sorry for being depressing#i dont wanna do this anymore#kill my feelings#i hate my body#i hate it here#i hate this#sewer slide#tw sui ideation#suic1de#killing myself#i hate everything#im tired#im exhausted#mentally exhausted#mentally fucked#i hate my existence#tw ana rant#rant post#i wanna diiiieeeee#self destruction
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Experiencing Derealization and impending doom suddenly at the same time is fucking wild.
#ajin#kei nagai#my art#vent art#I guess?#tw heart#body horro tw#is it???#anyways I got up and counted my heartbeats#personally that helps a lot#but holy fuck I was so ready to rip my chest open just to make sure my heart was beating#it’s not a very good feeling lol#everything is swag now tho
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