#my blog is my only place of free speech

[mrmillipede]

I hate forcemasc man I’m sorry I have to get it outttttt being told that I need to be pumped with testosterone and become a dumb puppy boy isn’t affirming at all it’s so cringe and yucky I am sorryyyyyyyy

[romanticatheartt]

Well f*cking done people. Keep this up and you'll chase away every single artist. Good job.

[kooqitas]

— sharing ★ with: bts

#pairings: bf!jungkook X friends!bts X reader #synopsis: where your boyfriend decides to ask his friends what they want to see #tags: pwp, group sex, blowjob, rough oral sex (m.), fingering (f.), humiliation, degradation, cumslut, spit, sperm, tears, free use (?). aftercare mentioned but not shown. mention of bisexual jungkook #notes: this is more fetishistic than usual on this blog, so DON'T READ if you're uncomfortable with 7 guys cumming on your face and swearing at you. #wc: 2,2k

you see your friends after a months, like since you and jungkook are living together you don't see them. it's funny, cause you are friends an years ago, but at a some months you just can't see each other.

"you're so hot dressing like that, maybe if we fuck before the guys comes..." jungkook said lifting your skirt and rubbing your hole. 

"namjoon text me, he said that come in five minutes with the guys"

"i promise that i can make you cum in five minutes"

you laughed, because you know that’s real…

but the other six guys are at your door in five minutes. not just six guys but six best friends of yours.

"i know that we fucked yesterday, but god, i need eat your pussy again, i'm addicted, i need fuck you every hour, every minute, every second, night after night..." despite the completely dirty speech, jungkook was kissing his shoulder calmly.

“the guys are coming in any minute” you tried to convince yourself.

“don't be so mean to me, give me that dirty little hole, please”

jungkook moved one of his hands up to the thin strap of your shirt, pulling it down and exposing your nipples, he turned you around, putting his mouth there without any ceremony. you were used to your boyfriend's tongue, how he sucked and bit the nipple of your breast with devotion.

and then the doorbell rang.

"jungkook, stop, the boys are here." you tried to stop your boyfriend.

"i'm sure they wouldn't mind seeing me fuck you, baby. and you don't mind showing how that tight hole stretches with my cock, sure?”

god, this is a FUCKING true, you and jungkook are worse than each other, but more than showing, you'd easily let them stretch you too!

"i know exactly what you thought, dirty little girl." he said before going back to sucking your nipples.

and then they rang the doorbell again.

"holy shit!" jungkook complained, going to open the door, you are trying clumsily to put your clothes in place.

when the other six men entered your house you smiled, you missed them, namjoon was the first to hug you, leaving a kiss on your forehead in a gentle way, and damn, you had seen some photos he posted at the gym, but he was BIG…

seokjin came next, the tall man kissing your hand before giving you a cute hug.

and after, jimin came, leaving a wet kiss on your cheek as he always did, the blonde guy had a scent that was enough to make your panties even wetter.

shit, jungkook shouldn’t have teased you.

you noticed that taehyung whispered something to yoongi, who laughed, muttering something like 'have decency?' and only then did you notice that, probably due to jungkook's saliva, your tits were wet, and the thin shirt clearly marked this.

"oh, yes! you disturbed us, i was dying to fuck my wife and you arrived."

a lot of things happened in that sentence, jungkook calling you 'my wife' and mainly, him exposing your sex life to all his friends.

it's not like they didn't imagine, you were friends before you and jungkook dated, the other six knew what you were like, and how jungkook was too, it was a matter of adding a + b, sometimes they would say something in the group chat, but It was the first time they had said something like that in front of them.

"if you want to fuck her, i don't care, as long as i can watch. it's not like i've never fucked you guys." hoseok said as if she wished a 'good morning'.

and that was the truth, besides jungkook, you had already had sex with at least four of your friends, and the same went for him, it's very likely that that's why he wasn't jealous.

"oh, can i? because i really want to do this."

god, your boyfriend was a perv.

“please, i miss seeing her tits.” namjoon confessed, reminding you of how he loved being on top of you, sucking your nipple to make you relax on his fat cock.

“dude, respect my girl!”

jungkook scolded namjoon, but you knew it was a joke as soon as your boyfriend came behind you, pulling the strap of your shirt down and exposing your breasts to his friends.

if you stopped to think about it, you would think it was crazy, your boyfriend sharing you with six other guys, but on the other hand, the other six guys were your friends, and you wanted much more than just looks at you.

“does anyone want to see anything else?” jungkook asked, making you feel your panties soaking, you felt like an exposed slut, a trophy, and that would never be a bad thing.

"her panties" seokjin said, looking at you with devotion, you had never done anything other than kiss him at a party.

“i want something” taehyung said.

"what do you want to see?"

"i want to see her on her knees sucking my cock." it was direct.

"if you suck taehyung's cock you'll have to suck mine too!' yoongi spoke up.

"and certainly mine too." jimin said, rubbing his thumb across his lips.

“let me get this straight,” jungkook scratched his throat. "are you saying to my face that you want my wife to give you a blowjob?"

"it was you who offered her to us like a prostitute." hoseok spoke up, unbuckling his belt.

god, you never felt so horny, your boyfriend and your friends discussed you as if you were even in that room.

"what do you think about this, baby?" Jungkook asked you.

"well..." you just walked around the counter, heading towards the sofa (being followed by the seven men as if they were puppies), and then removed your skirt and the blouse that was around your waist.

jungkook came to you, kissing you as you removed his clothes, his fingers brushing the white lace of your wet panties as you let out little moans into his mouth. your boyfriend was completely turned on, rubbing his pecs on your nipples making you moan even more.

"my little slut is so greedy, seven guys in your mouth? will you be able to handle it?"

"i need to get it!"

"good whore!" he kissed you one last time. "you don't deserve that much, organize yourself to kiss her in pairs, and you know her and the word, anything I'll insist on killing each one of you.”

jungkook barely finished and jimin and seokjin came close to you, jimin from behind, pressing his already hard cock on your back, and seokjin on your belly, at that moment you wanted both of them inside you, but all you got was seokjin sucking and nibbling your nipples while jimin kissed you and played with your wet panties. you moaning to the two of them while the other five watched everything.

you didn't even notice when taehyung and yoongi arrived, their firm hands using you to rub themself, it was pathetic, the pinch that yoongi gave your left nipple while your hand was inside taehyung's pants made you scream in pain, but mixed with pleasure, you liked that aggressive way.

"are you going to call me daddy again tonight?" namjoon asked as he approached you with hoseok, sticking two fingers into your pussy without any warning when hoseok’s kissing you “i missed that drippy messy hole.” namjoon goes fast, he starts scissoring his fingers inside you, you moan so loud because everything is even hotter when you see all those other men looking at you.

"i think the guys will like to see this" hoseok moved out of your way, exposing everyone to the image of you moaning into namjoon's fingers.

"so pretty our bimbo slut!" jimin said, watching the scene.

your boyfriend wanted to tell namjoon to stop it, take you to the bedroom and fuck you until his body shut down, but just seeing how much fun you were having with it all made him wait.

namjoon adds a third finger in without warning and you're feel so humiliated, leak around his hands when he fucks his fingers in and out of your cunt at an insane rhythm. 

"tell your boyfriend how much you miss my cock opening all that hole, how much you miss your girl juices running down my cock. how you love look at my cock crammed in your tight pussy” and then he took his fingers out of you, rubbing them on your lips and forcing you to kneel on the floor. “you're not going to cum, unless whore, you're going to shove our dicks down your throat and let us cum all over your body, then your boyfriend sees what he does to you full of other men's cum”

and then you noticed the other six men approach you with their dicks in their hands, taehyung was the first to pull your hair, and you were agile with your warm tongue tracing his dick up and down.

while your tongue was still on taehyung, hoseok rubbed his balls in your face, and you tried to grab them on your tongue too, but it was in vain.

“jungkook you date a prostitute!” seokjin said when you grabbed his dick, starting a masturbation.

"i'm sure she can handle two" jimin said, shoving his cock along with taehyung's down your throat.

and you sucked it, not even you know how, but you sucked it like it was the most delicious lollipop in the world while they both thrust hard into your throat.

at one point in the night, you had jimin and taehyung's dick in your mouth and seokjin and hoseok one in each hand. namjoon, jungkook and yoongi took turns rubbing their dicks over your body and slapping your chest and face.

jimin took his dick out of your mouth, and you fit seokjin's cock, watching from the side as jimin started jerking off.

yoongi was in your right hand, you caressing his balls.

you felt some tears in your eyes, sometimes hitting your friends' thighs to make them stop for you to breathe, before returning to the aggressive pace.

the feeling was much more pleasant due to the environment than the sexual act itself, since you could barely actually suck the dicks, every time someone was coming in and out of your mouth.

"i think this stupid bitch was too greedy, she hasn't choked on my dick yet" namjoon complained, making you release seokjin and hoseok's dick that were in your mouth, when the two came out, an absurd amount of saliva ran out of you, it was humiliating, but you didn't have much time to think as soon namjoon grabbed your hair and made your nose touch his pelvis.

and then yoongi and jungkook joined him, rubbing their balls all over your face while you just opened your mouth and gladly accepted whatever they gave you.

"you look like a bitch in heat, trying to suck all these dicks when you clearly can't!" yoongi complained.

and this triggered a series of humiliations.

"disgusting mouth, can't even suck dick properly!" jimin said.

"i'm ashamed to say that that mouth touched my dick." seokjin said as he buried his throat on his cock, making you cough and cry.

"i think the only good hole in you is your pussy." namjoon said shortly after spitting at you, encouraging the other six to do the same.

no matter how much they cursed and humiliated you, you had never felt so good, the feeling of having seven men in a circle around you was inexplicable.

and when hoseok left your mouth just to cum you felt even better.

his sperm falling down your face and breasts, mixing with that of jimin and taehyung who came soon after.

“our cumslut, so disgusting, free whore, thank u, jungkook” taehyung joked, grabbing your hair.

you came back with namjoon's dick in your mouth, choking and coughing several times as he fucked your mouth with even greater force than he used to do in your other holes.

“dating jungkook made you stupid, that mouth doesn't do anything right!” namjoon shouted, pulling his dick out of your throat only to spit a thick string of saliva there and hit you on face.

your face full of other guys cum while you was still sucking namjoon was what made your boyfriend cum on your face, making namjoon's big cock a little dirty.

"be useful at least a little and make me cum in that throat" yoongi said.

you put yoongi's dick back in your mouth, sucking it and namjoon's as they fucked you, and you saw stars as they came together and filled your throat, so full to the point that it leaked out of your mouth even though you tried to swallow.

you cum, without any stimulation other than the humiliation and the cum on your body, you just came so hard that your body shook.

you were a mess, your entire body and the room floor is a mixture of tears, cum, and spit. and you were still fucking wet.

"do you want some help with her?" your friends offered, after putting on your clothes and seeing that you were completely destroyed.

“no need,” jungkook thanked. "i take care of my princess."

and then the other six walked over to you, giving you a careful peck on the mouth before being led to the door.

[xavigav]

The Reddit Blackout, #196, And Being New to Tumblr

okay i've seen a lot of people in the past ~24 hours or so confused by everything going on with Reddit & Tumblr from both sides - people new to tumblr who don't know how to use it, and tumblr users who don't know what's going on with reddit and why many of its users have joined up here i know this isn't really related to my blog but fun fact about me: i was up until recently a very active reddit user and even mod a subreddit, but I've also been on tumblr for about 3 years now on different accounts, so I think I can see pretty well from both sides of this and explain what's going on this post will be split in 2 sections: what happened with reddit (and what #196 means), and a guide for new users

1. What The Hell Is Going On With Reddit?

The thing that's caused all this ruckus is a major change to Reddit's API, which is what Reddit provides to people so they can pull directly from Reddit to make third-party apps or tools.

The change is that Reddit is changing its previously free API to be paid. Which on its own kinda sucks for developers, but it's not unexpected. They need to make money somehow, right?

The problem is that the API pricing is WAY TOO FUCKING EXPENSIVE. The developer of the most popular 3rd party Reddit app, Apollo, says it will cost him $20 million a year to continue running the app as normal.

Essentially, this pricing forces almost everything third-party to shut down, which causes 3 major problems:

Third-party apps cannot keep running, which sucks for normal users because Reddit's official app is awful. It's slow, its video player is a thing of nightmares, it doesn't have many useful features third-party developers have made.

It sucks even more for visually impaired users because they can't use the official Reddit app at all. Reddit's official app does not work with iOS's native text-to-speech function. Third party apps, on the other hand, often do. So Reddit is forcing blind users away.

Third-party moderator tools cannot keep running, which sucks for moderators because many rely on these tools to properly moderate their subreddits. And moderators are often necessary, because without them subreddits get banned and hate speech and even CSA can often run rampant.

So you see why this change is bad.

Reddit users were PISSED.

So over the past week and a half or so, they have been working on organizing a site-wide blackout. The majority of the most active subreddits have now gone private. Some are only doing it for 48 hours, others (such as r/196) are doing it indefinitely.

That's why you can't access most of Reddit right now, and that's why many users have come here.

You're probably still wondering, though - what is this #196?

Well, as you may guess, it's connected to that subreddit r/196 I just mentioned. r/196 is a subreddit which only has one rule: every time you visit, you must post before you leave.

That's it, that's the subreddit.

The thing about r/196 that set it apart from most other subreddits - and what lends the subreddit's users perfectly to Tumblr - is that it was dominated by queer and leftist users.

So now they've come here and set up shop in #196 and r/196 so they can continue their merry little shitposting.

There's a ton of lore related to r/196, actually, but this is already a long tumblr post and quite frankly I cannot be bothered to write about it at the moment.

2. I'm Here From Reddit, What Now?

Hello there, random new user. As a double-citizen of Reddit and Tumblr, let me show you around this place.

First off, there are some other people who are better at explaining that I am who have made some really helpful things. Watch this Strange Aeons video as a guide to Tumblr culture and functionality and read this post which directly compares Reddit and Tumblr.

Assuming you've done that, here's some additional advice of my own:

Do you miss sorting subreddits by top of all time/the year/the month? Well, you can do something very similar with tags! If you go to a tag at the top of the screen you can select top, and then at the dropdown that says "all time" you can select different time periods! Even 6 months, which Reddit hasn't ever had.

Tumblr has a lot of cool customization features! Even outside your icon/banner/bio, you can change you blog colors and on desktop you can have an html theme (which has its own thriving community here). That customization is part of what sets Tumblr apart from everywhere else - I think you'll enjoy playing with it.

Notes will probably confuse you at first. Unlike the different numbers for upvotes and comments, notes combines the total number of likes, reblogs, and replies into the same number.

Outside of organizing your own blog, when making your own posts tags are what help other people find your post. Use them! But don't abuse them, because then people will just block you.

There are three ways of people finding your post: if someone follows you, if someone follows the tag(s) assigned to your post, and if someone is just scrolling through the tag(s) assigned to your post (and also the secret 4th way no one uses, which is finding it on the trending page, but even if people did use it no one will find your post initially that way)

tumblr is no longer The Discourse Website. And unlike what Reddit wants you to believe for some reason, it is very much alive still. Most of the people seeking fights have moved to Twitter (though some have also moved back here again). You will not get any brownie points for being a dipshit like you do on some subreddits.

So there, welcome to the hellsite (affectionate), you'll pick up on all the in-jokes eventually, for now just try not to be a nuisance and soon enough this'll be your new internet home.

[guardians-ofthe-lastyoungkilljoy]

i know the end - vettel

(gif not mine @usersewis)

pairing: sebastian vettel x reader

summary: Sebastian came into your life in 2015 and left in 2020 - but you fell in love with him and he just wanted a championship.

themes/warnings: alcohol, ANGST, no use of y/n, description of a panic attack, unrequited love, waxing poetic about ferrari - can you tell they're my fav team, kimi mentioned, charles is here too !! THIS IS FICTION

wc: 3.6k

a/n: someone on tumblr said that ferrari is a haunted house with a picket fence and i have never stopped thinking about it since. i have also never stopped thinking about sebastian vettel - subcategory of seb thoughts is seb in ferrari. also still open to do requests - trying out this whole fic writing thing. will also need help with organising my blog if anyone is keen :)

read on ao3 https://archiveofourown.org/works/60713827

Sebastian joined Ferrari in 2015. The team were ecstatic to have the four time world champion join their ranks, determined to bring Ferrari back to its former glory. 

You were working on the strategy team, fairly new but established enough to be listened to on the rare occasion. 

You met Seb in the pre-season at his factory introduction. He made his speech, charming the floor with his near perfect Italian. He popped into the strategy meeting room during his tour, a war room that had become home for you with its laptops and papers spread out. Sebastian was the perfect gentleman, shaking hands with everyone, though you thought he may have held on a bit longer with you.

The season started soon after, the entire garage working overtime. You were given the opportunity to accompany the team at races, rather than being stuck at Maranello.This is how you became Sebastian’s favourite strategist. 

You’re not exactly sure when it happened. You made a good strategy call in Malaysia, a well timed pit stop in Hungary and by Singapore, the lion knew your coffee order from the Ferrari cafeteria, ensuring to always pass you some before a long meeting. 

Falling for Sebastian was drawn out, comprised of lingering greeting hugs, good conversation at team dinners, long nights at the factory and searing glances across foreign nightclubs. 

You didn’t realise it for a while, and you wouldn’t realise it until it was too late. The attention you received was perhaps just part of Seb’s charm, and he had the whole motorsport world wrapped around his infamous finger. 

2016 brought on a winless year for Ferrari, both Kimi and Sebastian unable to make it to that crucial top step. 

You found Seb at the back of the Ferrari motorhome after a particularly tough race, hiding between tyre stacks. You overheard his PR team scrambling to find him - you slipped out to the back unnoticed, knowing exactly where he was. 

The tyre stacks were sort of a shared place for you and Sebastian, free from the prying eyes of the world. The only person who knew about it was Sebastian’s head mechanic, who accidentally stumbled upon you two sharing champagne after a podium last year. 

I’ll be there soon. Sebastian recognised your footsteps before even looking up. 

You sat down beside him, trying to find the words while he absentmindedly played with his water bottle. 

I’m sorr-

I don’t want to hear it. 

Sebastian had never snapped at you. You knew the strategy calls were bad today, resulting in an ill timed pitstop and Sebastian falling through the other. This Seb, this was completely foreign to you. 

Seb stood and left, sparing no further glance at you. It was a punch to your gut. Did he blame you? Drivers were always temperamental, that you knew, but Sebastian had always been nothing but kind and mature with you. 

Your body went into autopilot mode, packing up what you can before the team debrief. 

Sebastian barely spared you a glance as everyone settled in for the debrief. Perhaps a sign that he calmed down during media duties, but you knew better than to play detective with another man’s emotions. 

Strategy seemed to be the biggest issue to tackle with your boss taking the lead. You half listened, taking notes occasionally until he mentioned your name. 

One of the plans you brought up in pre-race meetings was bold and daring. It was entertained, but ultimately shoved aside for what ended up happening during the race. However after witnessing what happened in the race, it would have gained the team some higher positions. 

Ferrari is a team, one where we win and lose together. Every aspect is just as important as each other. Admitting mistakes and learning for them is how the team gets stronger. 

The strategy admission had Sebastian sneaking glances at you for the rest of the meeting. You felt it, but you weren’t exactly ready to forgive yet. 

You returned to your home in Maranello without so much as another word to Sebastian. You were, however, greeted by a bouquet of peonies on your dining table, along with a note from the man you were so desperately trying not to think about.

By 7PM the same day, you and Seb were sharing a blanket on the couch and watching a romcom, having devoured pizza and now working your way through a giant bag of chocolate wafers. 

Unfortunately, Seb knew the way to your heart. As you tucked yourself into bed that night, you realised that you never shared a conversation with him about Sunday and an even scarier thought, you had forgiven him. 

2017 saw you and Sebastian grow even closer. Movie nights at your apartment became the norm and Seb often took you to dinner on race weekends, despite your protests that the dinners were too fancy. He had to spoil his favourite strategist would always be his response. 

Sebastian returned to the top step of Monaco that year, the Italian anthem blaring across the track along with a chorus of devoted Tifosi. He sneaked off after the celebrations, pulling you with him to the tyre stacks, champagne bottle on the other hand. 

Seb passed you the bottle and you took a large sip, pushing down the thought that his lips were on it mere moments ago. 

Are you coming to the afterparty?

Yes, but I don’t have anything to wear? 

No party dress packed? Ye of little faith. 

You rolled your eyes and shoved the bottle back into his hands. The endless banter and teasing simultaneously made you forget about your feelings for Seb but also made you fall harder for him. 

Don’t worry, I’ll take care of it. He kissed your cheek and walked away. 

Cheek kisses weren’t new for Seb, having evolved from greeting hugs long ago. But “take care of it”? Well, he better not be doing what you were thinking. 

You returned to your hotel room to a large black box on your bed, an extravagant red bow tied around it with a handwritten note, definitely scrawled on by a tipsy Seb. 

The box revealed a red dress, and on top of it, another small box. You opened it and out dangled a small necklace with a heart charm. Engraved on one side was the number 5. Sebastian. 

Sebastian knocked on your door two hours later, dressed sharp and ready for the night ahead. He took you in, the dress he picked out was the perfect fit against your skin. There was however, one missing detail. 

The necklace? 

It’s a bit much, no?

Nonsense. 

Sebastian walked into your room and spotted the necklace on the bed. He took it out of its pouch and motioned for you to stand in front of the mirror. He stood behind, putting the necklace on you. His fingers ghosted over your neck, raising the tiny hairs on your skin. 

Team number 5. 

Sebastian kissed the side of your head and his fingers trailed down your arm to grab your hand. You followed him out in a daze to the elevator. 

The dim light of the elevator and Sebastian’s intoxicating cologne enveloping the cramped box. The elevator dinged, letting in more people. The sound woke you from whatever spell Sebastian cast. You counted down the floors until you had to leave the warmth of Sebastian’s side and his calloused hand around yours. 

Ground floor. The air was clearer as you exited the bubble - reality. Because despite everything, Sebastian wasn’t yours. He is Ferrari’s. You are Ferrari’s. For now, sharing a home would be enough. 

You never left Sebastian’s line of sight all night. Between partying with your girlfriends, sharing a drink with your boss and a few dances with Seb, the clarity in the haze of the club was Sebastian. 

As the night began winding down, Sebastian approached you at a booth. He was holding a mystery drink and his pupils were blown wide. He began blabbering about something Kimi did, the Finn possibly to blame for Sebastian’s current state. You took one look at him and began arranging a cab back to the hotel. 

You managed to drag a half asleep Sebastian back to his room. You sat him on the edge of the bed while you filled up a water bottle. You came back and found him spread eagle on the bed. At least he took his shoes off. 

Goodnight Seb. 

You were halfway out the room when you heard it. 

I love you.

You froze. Looking back, you saw Seb snoring peacefully, hugging a pillow to his chest. No, he’s drunk and sleeping. It wasn’t for you. It could’ve been for his bed for all you cared for. It didn’t matter, despite your heart wishing it was for you.

2018 was another successful year for Ferrari. Sebastian came home with five wins that year, placing second in the drivers standings and Kimi in third. All in all, you were quite proud of the team’s efforts that year and you knew you could unlock more of that potential. 

However, you could feel something bothering Sebastian. An itch that had been present all season. You had asked a few times, but Seb always insisted it was nothing. You knew Sebastian well enough by this point. You could read him, to an extent. But if he truly wanted to hide something, you would be helpless at getting it out. 

Sebastian invited you to stay at his farm in Switzerland for a week during the winter break. You happily obliged, having not seen him since wrapping up in Abu dhabi. You could use the tranquillity of farm life for a bit. 

Your days there were spent helping Sebastian with the animals. He taught you horse riding and you taught him baking. You let yourself get lost in that life, if just for a mere moment. Perhaps in some alternate universe, this was your home with him, that you weren’t only playing house for a week. 

You and Sebastian were laying on the carpet in front of the fireplace, sharing a bowl of attempted smores. It was your last night there before you had to jet off back to Maranello to begin pre season work. 

Seb got quiet, not exactly rare but it was different when something was on his mind. 

Would you ever leave? 

Leave where?

Ferrari.

No. Ferrari is home. 

Sebastian hummed, adding nothing more but deciding to bite into another smore. A bit of chocolate dripped onto his chin. You chuckled and wiped it off with your thumb.

Besides, you don’t need to worry about that new French kid. You’re still my favourite, world champion. 

Sebastian laughed, but you missed the melancholy in his eyes and the smile not quite reaching his eyes. 

Being a Tifosi came with many highs and lows - any balding Italian man can tell you that. It was felt even more within the team, especially for Sebastian this year. 

2019 saw the meteoric rise of Charles Leclerc, the predestined. He cemented his place as not only the future of Ferrari itself, but of the sport as well. 

Charles was full of energy and light. You grew fond of the kid and it was nice to have his company amidst the turmoil surrounding the team that year. 

You went into that year determined to get Sebastian his championship he so desperately craved. You were instead met by cheating rumours, bad calls, power shifting and well, an increasingly frustrated Sebastian. 

Sebastian who has been chasing that championship feeling for years. Sebastian who bleeds Ferrari red. Sebastian who is determined to bring the team back to the top. Sebastian, who is not quite yours, but you devoted your red heart to. 

Perhaps that’s how you ended up in this position. 

Sebastian pulled you into his driver’s room after a race. The habit has raised a few eyebrows from passing crew, but none have said a word. 

Nothing ever happened anyways. 

Seb would sit you on his couch and you’d listen. Listen as he rambled in a heinous mix of German, Italian and English. Listen as he let out his emotions after a race and all the lows he went through that weekend. 

You’d bring up some of these points to relevant crew members. It would be worked on and by the following race, it would be better. But it was never enough for Sebastian. 

You understood, he was supposed to bring Ferrari back, follow in the footsteps of his mentor and hero. It was an immense pressure and responsibility that has been carried for years. Now, the Italians have put their faith in his teammate, throwing him aside like an old toy. 

It was draining for you too, being subjected to this almost every weekend. It wasn’t your burden to bear, but this was Sebastian. He is still Rosso Corsa, and you weren’t one to deny a cry for help. 

Singapore rolled around, one of Sebastian’s favourites. He crossed the line in first place that night. You haven’t been so happy in months. 

Sebastian found you at your desk after media duties. You were still on the adrenaline high, but the tiredness began seeping back into your bones. You knew you weren’t sleeping well, the stress of the season getting to you and your eyes looked darker than ever. For Ferrari, the pain was always worth it. 

Come out tonight. 

Seb, I feel dead. 

And the race winner is personally inviting you. 

You could never resist him, which is how you have an extremely plastered Seb on your arm as you walk back to the hotel. Apparently being part of Team 5 also meant babysitting when he’s had one too many. 

I LOVE FERRARI! I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE! FORZA FERRARI! 

Sempre. 

May 2020. F1 was still on the break. The only place you went was your home in Maranello and occasionally the factory. You hadn’t seen Sebastian in months and to be honest, you haven’t heard from him as much as you wanted to. 

Then, the announcement. Sebastian Vettel to leave Ferrari by the end of the 2020 season. 

It came as a shock to you. Seb’s contract was up for renewal, you knew that. But he never said anything about leaving, at least, not to your face. And to find out from Instagram, rather than from the man himself, that was a whole other issue. 

You left several messages on Seb’s number over the next week, all remained unanswered. You knew he was a bit of a recluse sometimes, preferring quiet company over the glitz and glamour other drivers seemed to surround themselves with. Ignoring you however, that was unheard of. 

You asked some of Seb’s mechanics, but none have heard from him. You even asked Charles, but all he received was a polite thank you message. 

After a while, you gave up on contacting him. You knew better than to beg for a man’s attention, even Sebastian’s. It broke your heart to walk away, but you had to keep pushing and Ferrari needed to keep pushing. 

Red Bull Ring, Austria. The first race back was a much quieter environment than what you’ve been used to. Despite wanting to stay in Maranello, mainly to stay safe but also to avoid a certain German, your boss wanted you at the races. Who were you to deny the call of the Prancing Horse. 

You ignored him all weekend, refusing to make eye contact or be in his general presence at all. It was perhaps a bit petty, but you deserved to be after the last two months. 

Charles placed P2, a great result from the team for the first race back. You chatted to him at your desk after the race. Charles was a young man that had raw talent, immense passion and was wise beyond his years. You were lucky to call him a friend. 

Mid conversation, Charles glanced behind you. You knew exactly who was standing there, but he could wait his turn. 

You finished up with Charles, giving him a hug before he left. 

You stared at Seb standing awkwardly in the doorway. He shifted on his feet, for once not knowing what to say to you. 

Please say something. 

I have nothing to say to you. You’re the one who went radio silent for months. 

I’m sorry. 

You shook your head and looked away, not wanting him to see how much this affected you. 

I didn’t know how to tell you. 

Seb moved closer, stepping into your space. He reached out a shaky hand to yours. You gripped his, you couldn’t help it. A silent sob escaped your body. 

Come with me. 

You whipped around, searching his pleading eyes. 

Come with me. To Aston Martin. 

His other hand came up to the side of your head, cupping your cheeks and wiping away the tears on your cheek. 

Come with me. I need you. 

His hand brushed down the side of your neck, fingers finding the necklace he gifted all those years ago. 

Team 5. That’s our home. Please. 

Sebastian fiddled with the charm. He found the engraved 5 turned around, no longer facing outward like how you’ve always worn it. 

You took Sebastian’s hand and pressed a tender kiss to it. 

Ferrari is my home. I can’t come with you. 

You dropped his hand and looked anywhere else but him. You couldn’t bear to see the tears welling in his eyes. 

Please leave. 

Sebastian walked out, hesitating at the door. He took a last look at you and left. 

You let the cries come out. Every emotion you’ve kept the last few years came out in a tidal wave. 

You felt an arm wrapping around your shoulders, recognising Charles’ hand. He helped you to the floor and let you lean against him. 

I’m sorry. 

You requested to be transferred to Maranello for the rest of the season, citing health concerns. The team was sad to see you go, many of them enjoying your company on long race weekends. 

You only saw Sebastian in passing for the rest of the year, heard about him from mechanics, through strategy feedback and once from Charles. He knew not to press, but you didn’t miss the occasional flicker of sympathy from his eyes. 

Sebastian came by the factory after the season ended, a formal goodbye to Ferrari. There was food and drinks passed around and some quick speeches made. 

Sebastian was the last to come forward. 

It has been my dream to race for the Scuderia since I was a boy. Here I stand now, as a Ferrari driver for six incredible seasons. It still feels like cloud nine everytime I get to walk into this beautiful place and be greeted by the passion from every single one of you. I thank you all for the hard work you’ve put in all these years. 

Sebastian took a breath, as if hesitating on what to say next. You found yourself waiting, a small part of you hoping for him to say something, anything that would allow you to forgive him. 

I want to say a special thank you to those who have been by my side. You know who you are. I know I haven’t always made it easy, and I am sorry for that. But I am eternally grateful for you. 

Sebastian’s eyes found yours in the crowd. You found yourself fiddling with the necklace for comfort, forcing your eyes to hold back tears. 

Thank you all. Forza Ferrari sempre. 

The crowd erupted in cheers, applauding Seb as he made his way back into the crowd. 

Your ears were ringing, vision blurry and the swell of the crowd was suddenly too much. Your feet relief on instinct, turning you around and leading you towards the exit. 

A hand found your arm as you reached the lobby. Charles. The youngster took one look at you and said something about a car and to wait. Your body curled into a ball as you heaved. 

This was it. Sebastian was leaving. Leaving Ferrari and the home you built in it, with him. And neither of you could muster the courage for a proper goodbye. What an irony, Ferrari who creates heroes and legends but two of their best and brightest are cowards with each other. 

A sleek black Ferrari pulled up to the front. The rumble of the engine was enough to push yourself to stand and stumble your way to Charles who had opened the door for you. 

You turned, taking a look at the building. Ferrari is always going to be home, but the people in it give it meaning. Sebastian left, and your sun set, but it will rise again soon. 

You were at the door and hesitated for the briefest moment. That was enough for Sebastian to come running into the lobby. 

You stood in the moonlight with windswept hair and teary eyes. From the distance, Sebastian could just make out the glimmer of the necklace he gave you all those years ago and the most important thought - you were still the most beautiful woman he ever got the chance to know. 

He loved you. Loves you. It was real all along, not some drunken stupor that he convinced himself it was all those years ago, hiding because it would be easier than to let himself fall. 

He understood. You were always by his side, and he was too late to notice it, much less be grateful for it. You can't forgive him now, and he’s caused too much harm. It would be selfish of him to keep you tethered.  

 He needs to let you go. 

Sebastian nodded at you from his frozen place in the lobby. This is the end. You touched your hand to your heart, where your necklace fell. In another life. 

[mostlysignssomeportents]

Petard, Part III

If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2025/02/01/miskatonic-networks/#landlord-telco-industrial-complex

Last week, Trump's FCC chair Brendan Carr reversed a rule that banned your landlord from taking kickbacks in exchange for forcing you to use whatever ISP was willing to pay the biggest bribe for the right to screw you over:

https://arstechnica.com/tech-policy/2025/01/fcc-chair-nixes-plan-to-boost-broadband-competition-in-apartment-buildings/

Corporate fascists and their captured regulators are, of course, that most despicable of creatures: they are plagiarists. Like so many of our tech overlords, they have mistaken dystopian sf as a suggestion, rather than as a warning. I take this personally, because I actually wrote this as an sf story in 2013, and it was published in 2014 in MIT Tech Review's Twelve Tomorrows, edited by Bruce Sterling and published in 2014:

https://mitpress.mit.edu/9780262535595/twelve-tomorrows-2014/

I adapted it for my podcast, in four installments:

https://archive.org/details/Cory_Doctorow_Podcast_278

https://archive.org/details/Cory_Doctorow_Podcast_292

https://archive.org/details/Cory_Doctorow_Podcast_293

https://archive.org/details/Cory_Doctorow_Podcast_294_-_Petard_04

And, given the new currency of this old story, I thought it was only fitting that I serialize it here, on my blog, also in four parts.

Here's part one:

https://pluralistic.net/2025/01/30/landlord-telco-industrial-complex/#part-one

Here's part two:

https://pluralistic.net/2025/01/31/the-blood-speech/#part-two

And now, onto part three:

One of the early Ftp code contributors was now CTO for an ISP, and they'd gotten their start as a dorm co-op at Brown that had metastasized across New England. Sanjay had been pretty important to the early days of Ftp, helping us get the virtualization right so that it could run on pretty much any cloud without a lot of jiggery and/or pokery. Within a day of emailing Sanjay, I was having coffee with the vice-president of business development for Miskatonic Networks, who was also Sanjay's boyfriend's girlfriend, because apparently ISPs in New England are hotbeds of Lovecraft-fandom polyamory. Her name was Kadijah and she had a southie accent so thick it was like an amateur theater production of Good Will Hunting.

"The Termite Mound?" She laughed. "Shit yeah, I know that place. It's still standing? I went to some super sketchy parties there when I was a kid, I mean sooooper sketchy, like sketch-a-roony. I can't believe no one's torched the place yet."

"Not yet," I said. "And seeing as all my stuff's there right now, I'm hoping that no one does for the time being."

"Yeah, I can see that." I could not get over her accent. It was the most Bostonian thing I'd encountered since I got off the train. "OK, so you want to know what we'd charge to provide service to someone at the Termite Mound?"

"Uh, no. I want to know what you'd charge per person if we could get you the whole Mound — every unit in the residence. All 250 of them."

"Oh." She paused a second. "This is an Ftp thing, right?"

"Yeah," I said. "That's how I know Sanjay. I, uh, I started Ftp." I don't like to brag, but sometimes it makes sense in the context of the conversation, right?

"That was you? Wicked! So you're seriously gonna get the whole dorm to sign up with us?"

"I will if you can get me a price that I can sell to them," I said.

"Oh," she said. Then "Oh! Right. Hmm. Leave it with me. You say you can get them all signed up?"

"I think so. If the price is right. And I think that if the Termite Mound goes with you that there'll be other dorms that'll follow. Maybe a lab or two," I said. I was talking out of my ass at this point, but seriously, net-censorship in the labs at MIT? It was disgusting. It could not stand.

"Damn," she said. "Sounds like you're majoring in Ftp. Don't you have classes or something?"

"No," I said. "This is basically exactly what I figured college would be like. A cross between summer camp and an Stanford obedience experiment. If all I wanted to do was cram a bunch of knowledge into my head, I could have stayed home and mooced it. I came here because I wanted to level up and fight something tough and even dangerous. I want to spend four years getting into the right kind of trouble. Going to classes too, but seriously, classes? Whatever. Everyone knows the good conversations happen in the hallway between the formal presentations. Classes are just an excuse to have hallways."

She looked skeptical and ate banana bread.

"It's your deal," she said.

I could hear the but hanging in the air between us. She went and got more coffees and brought them back along with toasted banana bread dripping with butter for me. She wouldn't let me pay, and told me it was on Miskatonic. We were a potential big account. She didn't want to say "But" because she might offend me. I wanted to hear the "but."

"But?"

"But what?"

"It's my deal but…?"

"But, well, you know, you don't look after your grades, MIT'll put you out on your ass. That's how it works in college. I've seen it."

I chewed my banana bread.

"Hey," she said. "Hey. Are you OK, Lukasz?"

"I'm fine," I said.

She smiled at me. She was pretty. "But?"

I told her about my talk with AA, and about Juanca, and about how I felt like nobody was giving me my propers, and she looked very sympathetic, in a way that made me feel much younger. Like toddler younger.

"MIT is all about pranks, right? I think if I could come up with something really epic, they'd –" And as I said it, I realized how dumb it was. They laughed at me in Vienna, I'll show them! "You know what? Forget about it. I got more important things to do than screw around with those knob-ends. Work to do, right? Get the network opened up around here, you and me, Kadijah!"

"Don't let it get to you, you'll give yourself an aneurism. I'll get back to you soon, OK?"

#

I fished a bead out of my pocket and wedged it into my ear.

"Who is this?"

"Lukasz?" The voice was choked with tears.

"Who is this?" I said again.

"It's Bryan." I couldn't place the voice or the name.

"Bryan who?"

"From the Termite Mound's customer service desk." Then I recognized the voice. It was the elf, and he was having hysterics. Part of me wanted to say, Oh, diddums! and hang up. Because elves, AMR? But I'm not good at tough love.

"What's wrong?"

"They've fired me," he said. "I got called into my boss's office an hour ago and he told me to start drawing up a list of people to kick out of the dorm — he wanted the names of people who supported you. I was supposed to go through the EULAs for the dorm and find some violations for all of them –"

"What if they didn't have any violations?"

He made a sound between a sob and a laugh. "Are you kidding? You're always in violation! Have you read the EULA for the Mound? It's like sixty pages long."

"OK, gotcha. So you refused and you got fired?"

There was a pause. It drew out. "No," he said, his voice barely a whisper. "I gave them a bunch of names, and then they fired me."

Again, I was torn between the impulse to hang up on him and to hear more. Nosiness won (nosiness always wins; bets on nosiness are a sure thing). "Nicely done. Sounds like just deserts to me. What do you expect me to do about it?" But I knew. There were only two reasons to call me after something like this: to confess his sins or to get revenge. And no one would ever mistake me for a priest.

"I've got the names they pulled. Not just this time. Every time there's been any kind of trouble in the Termite Mound, MIT Residence has turfed out the troublemakers on some bogus EULA violation. They know that no one cares about student complaints, and there's always a waiting list for rooms at the Termite Mound, it's so central and all. I kept records."

"What kind of records?"

"Hardcopies of emails. They used disappearing ink for all the dirty stuff, but I just took pictures of my screen with my drop and saved it to personal storage. It's ugly. They went after pregnant girls, kids with disabilities. Any time there was a chance they'd have to do an air quality audit or fix a ramp, I'd have to find some reason to violate the tenant out of residence." He paused a moment. "They used some pretty bad language when they talked about these people, too."

The Termite Mound should've been called the Roach Motel: turn on the lights and you'd find a million scurrying bottom-feeders running for the baseboards.

I was going to turn on the lights.

"You've got all that, huh?

"Tons of it," he said. "Going back three years. I knew that if it ever got out that they'd try and blame it on me. I wanted records."

"OK," I said. "Meet me in Harvard Square, by the T entrance. How soon can you get there?"

"I'm at the Coop right now," he said. "Using a study-booth."

"Perfect," I said. "Five minutes then?"

"I'm on my way."

The Coop's study booths had big signs warning you that everything you did there was recorded — sound, video, infrared, data — and filtered for illicit behavior. The signs explained that there was no human being looking at the records unless you did something to trip the algorithm, like that made it better. If a tree falls in the forest, it sure as shit makes a sound; and if your conversation is bugged, it's bugged — whether or not a human being listens in right then or at some time in the infinite future of that data.

I beat him to the T entrance, and looked around for a place to talk. It wasn't good. From where I stood, I could see dozens of cameras, the little button-sized dots discretely placed all around the square, each with a little scannable code you could use to find out who got the footage and what it's policy was. No one ever, ever, ever bothered to do this. Ever. EULAs were not written for human consumption: a EULA's message could always be boiled down to seven words: "ABANDON HOPE, ALL YE WHO ENTER HERE." Or, more succinctly: "YOU LOSE."

I felt bad about Bryan's job. It was his own deal, of course. He'd stayed even after he knew how evil they were. And I hadn't held a gun to his head and made him put himself in the firing line. But of course, I had convinced him to. I had led him to. I felt bad.

Bryan turned up just as I was scouting a spot at an outdoor table by an ice-cream parlor. They had a bunch of big blowing heaters that'd do pretty good white-noise masking, a good light/dark contrast between the high-noon sun and the shade of the awning that would screw up cameras' white-balance, and the heaters would wreak havoc on the infra-red range of the CCTVs, or so I hoped. I grabbed Bryan, clamping down on his skinny arm through the rough weave of his forest-green cloak and dragged him into my chosen spot.

"You got it?" I said, once we were both seated and nursing hot chocolates. I got caffeinated marshmallows; he got Thai ghost pepper-flavored — though that was mostly marketing, no way those marshmallows were over a couple thousand Scovilles.

"I encrypted it with your public key," he said, handing me a folded up paper. I unfolded it and saw that it had been printed with a stegoed QR code, hidden in a Victorian woodcut. That kind of spycraft was pretty weaksauce — the two-dee-barcode-in-a-public-domain-image thing was a staple of shitty student clickbait thrillers — but if he'd really managed to get my public key and verify it and then encrypt the blob with it, I was impressed. That was about ten million times more secure than the average fumbledick ever managed. The fact that he'd handed me a hardcopy of the URL instead of emailing it to me, well, that was pretty sweet frosting. Bryan had potential.

I folded the paper away. "What should I be looking for?"

"It's all organized and tagged. You'll see." He looked nervous. "What are you going to do with it?"

"Well, for starters, I'm going to call them up and tell them I have it."

"What?" He looked like he was going to cry.

"Come on," I said. "I'm not going to tell them where I got it. The way you tell it, I'm about to get evicted, right?"

"Technically, you are evicted. There's a process-server waiting at every entrance to the Termite Mound doing face-recognition on the whole list. Soon as you go home, bam. 48 hours to clear out."

"Right," I said. "I don't want to have to go look for a place to live while I'm also destroying these shitbirds and fixing everyone's Internet connection. Get serious. So I'm going to go and talk to Messrs Amoral, Nonmoral and Immoral and explain that I have a giant dump of compromising messages from them that I'm going public with, and it'll look really, really bad for them if they turf me out now."

It's time for a true confession. I am not nearly as brave as I front. All this spycraft stuff, all the bluster about beating these guys on their home turf, yeah, in part I'm into it — I like it better than riding through life like a foil chip-bag being swept down a polluted stream on a current of raw sewage during a climate-change-driven superstorm.

But the reality is that I can't really help myself. There's some kind of rot-fungus that infects the world. Things that are good when they're small and personal grow, and as they grow, their attack-surface grows with them, and they get more and more colonized by the fungus, making up stupid policies, doing awful stuff to the people who rely on them and the people who work for them, one particle of fungus at a time, each one just a tiny and totally defensible atomic-sized spoor of rot that piles up and gloms onto all the other bits of rot until you're a walking, suppurating lesion.

No one ever set out to create the kind of organization that needs to post a "MIT RESIDENCY LLC OPERATES A ZERO-TOLERANCE POLICY TOWARD EMPLOYEE ABUSE. YOU CAN BE FINED UP TO $2000 AND/OR IMPRISONED FOR SIX MONTHS FOR ASSAULTING A CAMPUS RESIDENCE WORKER" sign. You start out trying to do something good, then your realize you can get a little richer by making it a little worse. Your thermostat for shittiness gets reset to the new level, so it doesn't seem like much of a change to turn it a notch further towards the rock-bottom, irredeemably shitty end of the scale.

The truth is that you can get really rich and huge by playing host organism to the rot-fungus. The rot-fungus diffuses its harms and concentrates its rewards. That means that healthy organisms that haven't succumbed to the rot-fungus are liable to being devoured by giant, well-funded vectors for it — think of the great local business that gets devoured by an awful hedge-fund in a leveraged takeover, looted and left as a revolting husk to shamble on until it collapses under its own weight.

I am terrified of the rot-fungus, because it seems like I'm the only person who notices it most of the time. Think of all those places where the town council falls all over itself to lure some giant corporation to open a local factory. Don't they notice that everyone who works at places like that hates every single moment of every single day? Haven't they ever tried to converse with the customer-service bots run by one of those lumbering dinos?

I mean, sure, the bigs have giant budgets and they'll take politicians out for nice lunches and throw a lot of money at their campaigns, but don't these guardians of the public trust ever try to get their cars fixed under warranty? Don't they ever buy a train ticket? Don't they ever eat at a fast food joint? Can't they smell the rot-fungus? Am I the only one? I've figured out how to fight it in my own way. Everyone else who's fighting seems to be fighting against something else — injustice or inequality or whatever, without understanding that the fungus's rot is what causes all of those things.

I'm convinced that no normal human being ever woke up one morning and said, "Dammit, my life doesn't have enough petty bureaucratic rules, zero-tolerance policies, censorship and fear in it. How do I fix that?" Instead, they let this stuff pile up, one compromise at a time, building up huge sores suppurating with spore-loaded fluids that eventually burst free and beslime everything around them. It gets normal to them, one dribble at a time.

"Lukasz, you're don't know what you're doing. These guys, they're –"

"What?" I said. "Are they the mafia or something? Are they going to have me dropped off a bridge with cement overshoes?"

He shook his head, making the twigs and beads woven into the downy fluff of his hair clatter together. "No, but they're ruthless. I mean, totally ruthless. They're not normal."

The way he said it twinged something in my hindbrain, some little squiggle of fear, but I pushed it away. "Yeah, that's OK. I'm used to abnormal." I am the most abnormal person I know.

"Be careful, seriously," he said.

"Thanks, Bryan," I said. "Don't worry about me. You want me to try and get your room back, too?"

He chewed his lip. "Don't," he said. "They'll know it was me if you do that."

I resisted the urge to shout at him to grow a spine. These assholes had cost him his home and his job (OK, I'd helped) and he was going to couch-surf it until he could find the rarest of treasures: an affordable place to live in Cambridge, Mass? Even if he was being tortured by his conscience for all his deplorable selloutism, he was still being a total wuss. But that was his deal. I mean, he was an elf, for chrissakes. Who knew what he was thinking?

"Suit yourself," I said, and went and made some preparations.

#

Messers Amoral, Nonmoral and Immoral had an office over the river in Boston, in a shabby office-block that only had ten floors, but whose company directory listed over 800 businesses. I knew the kind of place, because they showed up whenever some hairy scam unravelled and they showed you the office-of-convenience used by the con-artists who'd destroyed something that lots of people cared about and loved in order to make a small number of bad people a little richer. A kind of breeding pit for rot-fungus, in other words.

At first I thought I was going to have to go and sleuth their real locations, but I saw that Amoral, Nonmoral and Immoral had the entire third floor registered to them, while everyone else had crazy-ass, heavily qualified suite numbers like 401c(1)K, indicating some kind of internal routing code for the use of the army of rot-fungus-infected spores who ensured that correspondence was handled in a way that preserved the illusion that each of the multifarious, blandly named shell companies (I swear to Cthulhu that there was one called "International Holdings (Holdings), Ltd") was a real going concern and not a transparent ruse intended to allow the rot-fungus to spread with maximal diffusion of culpability for the carriers who did its bidding.

I punched # # #300# # # on the ancient touchscreen intercom, its surface begrimed with a glossy coat of hardened DNA, Burger King residue and sifted-down dust of the ages. It blatted like an angry sheep, once, twice, three times, then disconnected. I punched again. Again. On the fourth try, an exasperated, wheezing voice emerged: "What?"

"I'm here to speak to someone from MIT Residences LLC."

"Send an email."

"I'm a tenant. My name is Lukasz Romero." I let that sink in. "I've got some documents I'd like to discuss with a responsible individual at MIT Residences LLC." I put a bit of heavy English on documents. "Please." I put even more English on "Please." I've seen the same tough-guy videos that you have, and I can do al-pacinoid overwound Dangerous Dude as well as anyone. "Please," I said again, meaning "Right. Now."

There was an elongated and ominous pause, punctuated by muffled rustling and grumbling, and what may have been typing on an old-fashioned, mechanical keyboard. "Come up," a different voice said. The elevator to my left ground as the car began to lower itself.

#

I'd expected something sinister — a peeling dungeon of a room where old men with armpit-stains gnawed haunches of meat and barked obscenities at each other. Instead, I found myself in an airy, high-ceilinged place that was straight out of the publicity shots for MIT's best labs, the ones that had been set-dressed by experts who'd ensured that no actual students had come in to mess things up before the photographer could get a beautifully lit shot of the platonic perfection.

The room took up the whole floor, dotted with conversation pits with worn, comfortable sofas whose end-tables sported inconspicuous charge-plates for power-hungry gadgets. The rest of the space was made up of new-looking worksurfaces and sanded-down antique wooden desks that emitted the honeyed glow of a thousand coats of wax buffed by decades of continuous use. The light came from tall windows and full-spectrum spotlights that were reflected and diffused off the ceiling, which was bare concrete and mazed with cable-trays and conduit. I smelled good coffee and toasting bread and saw a perfectly kept little kitchenette to my left.

There were perhaps a dozen people working in the room, standing at the worksurfaces, mousing away at the antique desks, or chatting intensely in the conversation pits. It was a kind of perfect tableau of industrious tech-company life, something out of a recruiting video. The people were young and either beautiful, handsome or both. I had the intense, unexpected desire to work here, or a place like this. It had good vibes.

One of the young, handsome people stood up from his conversation nook and smoothed out the herringbone wool hoodie he was wearing, an artfully cut thing that managed to make him look like both a young professor and an undergraduate at the same time. It helped that he was so fresh-faced, with apple cheeks and a shock of curly brown hair.

"Lukasz, right?" He held out a hand. He was wearing a dumbwatch, a wind-up thing in a steel casing that was fogged with a century of scratches. I coveted it instantly, though I knew nothing about its particulars, I was nevertheless certain that it was expensive, beautifully engineered, and extremely rare.

The door closed behind me and the magnet audibly reengaged. The rest of the people in the room studiously ignored us.

"I'm Sergey. Can I get you a cup of coffee? Tea? Some water?"

The coffee smelled good. "No thank you," I said. "I don't think I'll be here for long."

"Of course. Come and sit."

The other participants in his meeting had already vacated the sofas and left us with a conversation pit all to ourselves. I sank into the sofa and smelled the spicy cologne of a thousand eager, well-washed people who'd sat on it before me, impregnating the upholstery with the spoor of their good perfumes.

He picked up a small red enamel teapot and poured a delicious-smelling stream of yellow-green steaming liquid into a chunky diner-style coffee-cup. He sipped it. My stomach growled. "You told the receptionist you wanted to talk about some documents?"

"Yeah," I said, pulling myself together. "I've got documentary evidence of this company illegally evicting tenants — students — who got pregnant, complained about substandard living conditions and maintenance issues, and, in my case, complained about the network filters at the Termite Mound."

He cocked his head for a moment like he was listening for something in the hum and murmur of the office around him. I found myself listening, too, but try as I might, I couldn't pick out a single individual voice from the buzz, not even a lone intelligble word. It was as though they were all going "murmurmurmurmur," though I could see their lips moving and shaping what must have been words.

"Ah," he said at last. "Well, that's very unfortunate. Can you give me a set and I'll escalate them up our chain to ensure that they're properly dealt with?"

"I can give you a set," I said. "But I'll also be giving a set to the MIT ombudsman and the The Tech and the local Wikileaks Party rep. Sergey, forgive me, but you don't seem to be taking this very seriously. The material in my possession is the sort of thing that could get you and your colleagues here sued into a smoking crater."

"Oh, I appreciate that there's a lot of potential liability in the situation you describe, but it wouldn't be rational for me to freak out now, would it? I haven't seen your documents, and if I had, I can neither authenticate them nor evaluate the risk they represent. So I'll take a set from you and ensure that the people within our organization who have the expertise to manage this sort of thing get to them quickly."

It's funny. I'd anticipated that he'd answer like a chatbot, vomiting up Markov-chained nothings from the lexicon of the rot-fungus: "we take this very seriously," "we cannot comment on ongoing investigations," "we are actioning this with a thorough inquiry and post-mortem" and other similar crapola. Instead, he was talking like a hacker on a mailing list defending the severity he'd assigned to a bug he owned.

"Sergey, that's not much of an answer."

He sipped that delicious tea some more. "Is there something in particular you wanted to hear from me? I mean, this isn't the sort of thing that you find out about then everything stops until you've figured out what to do next."

I was off-balance. "I wanted –" I waved my hands. "I wanted an explanation. How the hell did this systematic abuse come about?"

He shrugged. He really didn't seem very worried "Hard to say, really. Maybe it was something out of the labs."

"What do you mean, 'the labs'?"

He gestured vaguely at one cluster of particularly engrossed young men and women who were bent over screens and worksurfaces, arranged in pairs or threesomes, collaborating with fierce intensity, reaching over to touch each others' screens and keyboards in a way I found instantly and deeply unsettling. "We've got a little R&D lab that works on some of our holdings. We're really dedicated to disrupting the rental market. There's so much money in it, you know, but mostly it's run by these entitled jerks who think that they're geniuses for having the brilliant idea of buying a building and then sitting around and charging rent on it. A real old boys' club." For the first time since we started talking, he really seemed to be alive and present and paying attention.

"Oh, they did some bits and pieces that gave them the superficial appearance of having a brain, but there's a lot of difference between A/B splitting your acquisition strategy and really deep-diving into the stuff that matters."

At this stage, I experienced a weird dissonance. I mean, I was there because these people were doing something genuinely villainous, real rot-fungus stuff. On the other hand, well, this sounded cool. I can't lie. I found it interesting. I mean, catnip-interesting.

"I mean, chewy questions. Like, if the median fine for a second citation for substandard plumbing is $400, and month-on-month cost for plumbing maintenance in a given building is $2,000 a month, and the long-term costs of failure to maintain are $20,000 for full re-plumbing on a 8-10 year basis with a 75 percent probability of having to do the big job in year nine, what are the tenancy parameters that maximize your return over that period?"

"Tenancy parameters?"

He looked at me. I was being stupid. I don't like that look. I suck at it. It's an ego thing. I just find it super-hard to deal with other people thinking that I'm dumb. I would probably get more done in this world if I didn't mind it so much. But I do. It's an imperfect world, and I am imperfect.

"Tenancy parameters. What are the parameters of a given tenant that predict whether he or she will call the city inspectors given some variable setpoint of substandard plumbing, set on a scale that has been validated through a rigorous regression through the data that establishes quantifiable inflection points relating to differential and discrete maintenance issues, including leaks, plugs, pressure, hot water temperature and volume, and so on. It's basically just a solve-for-x question, but it's one with a lot of details in the model that are arrived at through processes with a lot of room for error, so the model needs a lot of refinement and continuous iteration.

"And of course, it's all highly sensitive to external conditions — there's a whole game-theoretical set of questions about what other large-scale renters do in response to our own actions, and there's a information-theory dimension to this that's, well, it's amazing. Like, which elements of our strategy are telegraphed when we take certain actions as opposed to others, and how can those be steganographed through other apparent strategies.

"Now, most of these questions we can answer through pretty straightforward business processes, stuff that Amazon figured out twenty years ago. But there's a real risk of getting stuck in local maxima, just you know, overoptimizing inside of one particular paradigm with some easy returns. That's just reinventing the problem, though, making us into tomorrow's dinosaurs.

"If we're going to operate a culture of continuous improvement, we need to be internally disrupted to at least the same extent that we're disrupting those fat, stupid incumbents. That's why we have the labs. They're our chaos monkeys. They do all kinds of stuff that keeps our own models sharp. For example, they might incorporate a separate business and use our proprietary IP to try to compete with us — without telling us about it. Or give a set of autonomous agents privileges to communicate eviction notices in a way that causes a certain number of lawsuits to be filed, just to validate our assumptions about the pain-point at which an action or inaction on our side will trigger a suit from a tenant, especially for certain profiles of tenants.

"So there's not really any way that I can explain specifically what happened to the people mentioned in your correspondence. It's possible no one will ever be able to say with total certainty. I don't really know why anyone would expect it to be otherwise. We're not a deterministic state-machine, after all. If all we did was respond in set routines to set inputs, it'd be trivial to innovate around us and put us out of business. Our objective is to be strategically nonlinear and anti-deterministic within a range of continuously validated actions that map and remap a chaotic terrain of profitable activities in relation to property and rental. We're not rentiers, you understand. We don't own assets for a living. We do things with them. We're doing commercial science that advances the state of the art. We're discovering deep truths lurking in potentia in the shape of markets and harnessing them — putting them to work."

His eyes glittered. "Lukasz, you come in here with your handful of memos and you ask me to explain how they came about, as though this whole enterprise was a state-machine that we control. We do not control the enterprise. An enterprise is an artificial life-form built up from people and systems in order to minimize transaction costs so that it can be nimble and responsive, so that it can move into niches, dominate them, fully explore them. The human species has spent millennia recombining its institutions to uncover the deep, profound mathematics of power and efficiency.

"It's a terrain with a lot of cul-de-sacs and blind alleys. There are local maxima: maybe a three-move lookahead shows a good outcome from evicting someone who's pregnant and behind on the rent, but the six-move picture is different, because someone like you comes along and makes us look like total assholes. That's fine. All that means is that we have to prune that branch of the tree, try a new direction. Hell, ideally, you'd be in there so early, and give us such a thoroughgoing kicking, that we'd be able to discover and abort the misfire before the payload had fully deployed. You'd be saving us opportunity cost. You'd be part of our chaos-monkey.

"Lukasz, you come in here with your whistleblower memos. But I'm not participating in a short-term exercise. Our mission here is to quantize, systematize, harness and perfect interactions.

"You come in here and you want me to explain, right now, what we're going to do about your piece of information. Here's your answer, Lukasz: we will integrate it. We will create models that incorporate disprovable hypotheses about it, we will test those models, and we will refine them. We will make your documents part of our inventory of clues about the underlying nature of deep reality. Does that answer satisfy you, Lukasz?"

I stood up. Through the whole monologue, Sergey's eyes had not moved from mine, nor had his body-language shifted, nor had he demonstrated one glimmer of excitement or passion. Instead, he'd been matter-of-fact, like he'd been explaining the best way to make an omelet or the optimal public transit route to a distant suburb. I was used to people geeking out about the stuff they did. I'd never experienced this before, though: it was the opposite of geeking out, or maybe a geeking out that went so deep that it went through passion and came out the other side.

It scared me. I'd encountered many different versions of hidebound authoritarianism, fought the rot-fungus in many guises, but this was not like anything I'd ever seen. It had a purity that was almost… seductive.

But beautiful was not the opposite of terrible. The two could easily co-exist.

"I hear that I'm going to get evicted when I get back to the Termite Mound — you've got a process-server waiting for me. That's what I hear."

Sergey shrugged. "And?"

"And? And what use is your deep truth to me if I'm out on the street?"

"What's your point?"

He was as mild and calm as a recorded airport safety announcement. There was something inhuman — transhuman? — in that dispassionate mein.

"Don't kick me out of my place."

"Ah. Excuse me a second."

He finished his tea, set the cup down and headed over to the lab. He chatted with them, touched their screens. The murmur drowned out any words. I didn't try to disguise the fact that I was watching them. There was a long period during which they said nothing, did not touch anything, just stared at the screens with their heads so close together they were almost touching. It was a kind of pantomime of psychic communications.

He came back. "Done," he said. "Is there anything else? We're pretty busy around here."

"Thank you," I said. "No, that's about it."

"All right then," he said. "Are you going to leave me your documents?"

"Yes," I said, and passed him a stack of hardcopies. He looked at the paper for a moment, folded the stack carefully at the middle and put it in one of the wide side-pockets of his beautifully tailored cardigan.

I found my way back down to the ground floor and was amazed to see that the sun was still up. It had felt like hours had passed while Sergey had talked to me, and I could have sworn that the light had faded in those tall windows. But, checking my drop, I saw that it was only three o'clock. I had to be getting home.

There was a process-server waiting ostentatiously in the walkway when I got home, but he looked at me and then down at his screen and then let me pass.

It was only once I was in my room that I realized I hadn't done anything about Bryan's eviction.

[purpledemonlilyposting]

I didn’t know whether to send this ask on the lorch blog or the main, but re: why people view Dios as a villain from your last stream, I think there’s 2 main reasons:

- his entire portrayal at the end of adolescence where he’s taunting Anthy and begging her to come back to Ohtori as she & utena are riding away

- when he’s shown on the carousel after Utena gets stabbed. It’s the same carousel that’s shown before Akio goes to unlock the gate, and I’ve seen a few people claim that his speech to Utena is almost mocking her for her efforts

I’m not trying to be a lorch here, just wanted to give my 2 cents on this topic

It's best for Utena asks to go here I'd rather not clutter up my main blog XD

That's Akio at the end of the film. Dios is only seen once in the film when Anthy has a vision of him in Utena's place during Juri's duel.

(Edit: And like a couple glimpses of him by Juri and Miki which don't even ask me wtf it means the movie is nuts.)

The second argument is the one that really drives me crazy. If you've paid attention at all to Utena's symbolic language: when you see a character who is a dark silhouette you're not seeing the truth.

The "Dios" mocking Utena on the carousel whose sentences Akio finishes is not the real spirit of Dios. Akio has been trying to convince Utena that he and Dios are still the same person in order to get Utena to do what he wants.

But far, far away from the carousel with the mocking false version of Dios another Dios appears, one whose face we can see, one who seems to be the same one that came to Utena in her coffin. The one that exists because of Anthy. I don't think it's a coincidence that Utena meets him once again in a space between life and death.

This Dios says to her: "Don't look so sad. You've tried so hard until now. Don't blame yourself. You've treasured the Rose Crest ring until now. A kiss, to show my appreciation".

He then leans down to kiss her ring. The ring that is, remember, a promise that Utena will retain her childhood nobility and free Anthy from her eternal suffering.

Unlike the false puppet Dios this one is laying there crumpled on the ground with her. They're both far away from the carousel in a quiet, intimate moment. Akio is unaware this is happening. I see the true spirit of Dios kissing the ring the same as Anthy blessing the sword.

And he blesses her ring as the chorus in the background swells with the words: "I have vanished yet I still live. I exist. I am here. I exist. I am here."

And then in one of the most badass moments in anime Utena slams her fist into the ground and lifts herself back up. Refusing to give up on saving Anthy from this. She's only been stabbed once, Anthy is being stabbed a million times.

Now what seems to have happened is some people have gotten it in their head that Utena slamming her fist with the ring on it into the ground is her rejecting Dios. You know, cause they desperately want this to be "feminist" in the way that Utena don't NEED no man to help her! Despite the fact its more sexist to act like you can't be inspired to act by someone of the opposite sex.

Utena embodies Dios' spirit. She has since the beginning. Dios has been her ally throughout the entire show. That's why Anthy's heart has been moving to her instead of her memories of what Akio used to be. How is anyone possibly reading it as a rejection other than a willful misinterpretation based on what they WANT the show to be rather than what the actual text is communicating.

I even had someone try to tell me the ring is smashed to pieces here which uh... no?

The ring is a symbol of the promise to Anthy. The promise to become like the prince Anthy once loved and believed in for HER sake.

We see this true spirit of Dios two more times in the final episode. First he's lounging around listening to Akio brag about how Utena is going to lose. To me it seems like he's just waiting for Akio's defeat now that he has passed his purpose on to Utena. A purpose he's known he can no longer fulfill, because Akio exists and he no longer does outside of Anthy's wish and will that he could.

Akio doesn't notice Dios at all in this scene. He's just monologuing to himself about how Utena, the one who embodies the spirit of the Prince he once was, whose power he is hungry to regain, is a fool for being so persistent. And that's why Akio will never change the world. Because this twisted world and system only exists due to the hold he has on Anthy and his efforts to fully control every piece of her.

And then my final piece of evidence that Dios is Utena's ally: he vanishes behind the drink Akio is sucking up that represents Utena's remaining lifeforce. Dios quietly disappears forever behind that glass. And it's that exact moment that Utena opens the way to Anthy.

It's also worth noting that the fake puppet Dios peaces out when this happens too.

So anyone saying "Utena rejected Dios in the end" I have to assume is hearing this through 2nd or 3rd hand information from someone who has never experienced the actual show as anything beyond a "sword lesbians" mood board on Tumblr.

[kaisers-house-of-desires]

I decided to write a little something that was a little...self indulgent~

Should you want more of my own personal desires in your writing, just request the House Special in your message~

Title: Mostro’s New Toy

Characters: Azul Ashengrotto, Jade Leech, Floyd Leech, m!Reader

Contains: dark themes(dubcon, kidnapping), contractual agreement, bondage, blindfolds, mouth covering/gag, free use kink

Fandom: Twisted Wonderland

Full request below the cut

All characters are 18+

MINORS, FEM ALIGNED, AGELESS/BLANK BLOGS DNI

Reblogs > likes

It had been a week since your end of the bargain was fulfilled. Though you had no magic for payment, Azul had stated he would figure something out and not to worry about it, so after meeting your end of the deal, you were starting to get fidgety when a week had passed and yet nothing had happened yet.

You were rushing to your next class, cursing yourself for being late because of Grim’s antics and for looking away from him for a moment. You started to cut across the courtyard when an arm grabbed you from the bushes. You were about to scream for help when a white gloved hand silenced you. More specifically, it was the duct tape under the hand that kept you quiet, allowing your attacker to hold you firmly in two arms.

“Eaaasy, Shrimpy. No need to get loud~”

The nickname and voice was more than enough to at least solve the question of who was doing this. You muffled out his name, any struggling soon subsiding knowing you weren’t in any actual danger.

Though you couldn’t see, Floyd was giving a dopey grin. “Just here collecting some debt. Azul’s order’s. Time to pay up~”

Retrieving a bottle from his pocket, he shattered it against the ground, pieces flying as smoke surrounded you two, teleporting you back to Octavinelle.

———

Floyd stood with you still in his arms, the two of you now present in front of the Mostro’s manager, Azul in his VIP room. Jade stood beside him, as though ready to act if necessary.

“Terribly sorry for the scare,” Azul started, speaking from behind interlocked fingers, “but you see I’ve figured out the payment I desire from you.”

You tried to speak, but the tape remained firmly in place, only muffling your speech. Azul merely carried on, as if you weren’t trying to object.

“Oh no need to worry about it! Truly, this is the best thing you could give! Jade? If you’d please.”

“Yes, sir.” Jade began to step over to Floyd, the two of them giving the other a look that seemed to be one that only twins could understand. He opened his jacket, retrieving a bundle of deep green rope that was concealed in an inner pocket. Floyd spun you around, holding onto your shoulders and looking down at you with a threatening gaze and speaking in a serious, menacing tone.

“I’d stay still if I were you, unless you want to be squeezed.” It was that look that screamed “try it”. If you moved, be it trying to run off or even just a muscle, you knew it wouldn’t end well. Jade then grabbed your arms, pressing your wrists together and wrapping the surprisingly soft rope around them. He tied them off in a way that didn’t hurt but kept your wrists firmly together, effectively now leaving you at the mercy of the tweels before you.

“I’m sure you’ve figured it out by now, but I’ll tell you anyway, out of the kindness of my heart.” As Azul spoke, a strip of cloth covered your eyes. You were now blind, mute, and unable to fend for yourself in anyway. “I’ve decided your body will be perfect payment. I’ll have you situated in a way where patrons can come in, and use you the way they see fit. The blindfold is for confidentiality, of course, and the tape? Well that’s just for show. If they want to take it off they can~”

You’d be lying if you tried to object. The idea sent a heat straight to your groin, and you could feel a pressure at the zipper of your jeans as you hummed softly.

The brothers were already working on you, leading you into a new spot before pushing you down to your knees. The positioned you like a doll, spreading your legs open before unbuttoning your pants to reveal a partially hard, boxer covered phallus.

“Heeeeeyyy~ Little Shrimpy here is already enjoying himself~ You get off to the idea of this~?”

Hearing it out loud, especially from Floyd, only embarrassed you, and you shook your head to deny it.

“Such a thing is hard to deny when the evidence is right there, (y/n).” Jade’s voice sounded like velvet, smooth and calm. “It’s clear you’re quite aroused by this. There is no shame in admitting it.”

You shook your head with a small “mm-mm”, denying it, but deep down, you knew that lie wouldn’t last long, as Jade was right.

“Now boys,” Azul’s footsteps thudded against your ears as you heard him walk over. “I think we should find out if our new attraction is ready for the guests. What do you think?”

“Oh I get first dibs on Shrimpy?! I wanna test him out!” Floyd sounded all too excited by the idea, and you were already wondering what someone like him would do.

“Mmmm!” You let out an uncontrollable whine, but it went ignored.

“Oh please, Floyd. You’ll ruin our new toy before he even has a chance.” A small laugh laced Jade’s voice. “What if we tested him out together?”

“Wonderful idea!” Azul was more than willing to allow such a thing, his footsteps starting to soften as he stepped to the door. “I’ll be back in an hour. Try not to break our new plaything before I get back.”

“Yes, sir./Yeah, boss!”

The door opened and closed, and you were now alone with the brothers. Thought you couldn’t see them, you could feel their predatory gazes on you before their hands made first contact.

This…will be exciting…~ ❤️

[konigsblog]

🧎‍♀️👰🏼 thats me proposing to you btw

love you so much, i see your blog more than i see my family, or sunlight....

Anyways... Can i get little something with stepdad!Price pretty pleasee? Bonus points if he is mean but then maybe cuddles the reader and stuff yk mhmhmhmhmhmhmhm yummy yummy in my tummy girl dinner

Feel free to ignore/delete, take care byeee ʕ•́ᴥ•̀ʔっ

so sorry for taking so long to get around to this request :( im working my way through like 330+ requests (i KNOW, i keep turning them on because i love hearing your ideas.. but they'll have to be off for a while! :3)

and thank you!!! im glad you appreciate my work, LOVE YOU! 🎀🌷

stepcest, non-con, intoxication, mentions of weed and alcohol use

☆‧₊˚. stepdad!price has high standards, and he doesn't expect anything less. when he finds out you're skipping college or visits ot their house to go to some parties, or another boy's house, he's absolutely infuriated with you and wishes for nothing more but to make you sob and beg for mercy and forgiveness. he'll have to punish you to put you in your place...

price bends you over his muscular lap, with your tight, bruised ass in the air and tears running down your cheeks. he fucks his fingers into your asshole, fucking them into you while you plead for him to just fuck you with slurred speech and the smell of vodka and weed sticking to your disgusting dress, that's far too skimpy... ! :( you're so drunk and intoxicated that you don't even recognise the issues with fucking your stepfather!!

yet, john see's this as an opportunity to put you in your place. he bends his cock dumb whore of a stepdaughter over the kitchen table, the wooden legs creaking beneath both yours and price's weight. he leans his full weight onto you, pinning you down against the wooden table, slowly sliding inside your tight, wet asshole while you scream out and cry softly! :(

you're so new to having his thick, girthy cock inside you that you can only chant apologises and pleas for him to slide out as it's just too much to handle. but, price only rams harder into you; with his heavy, fat balls smacking against your ass on repeat, tight before he finishes deep inside you with a low, hoarse, guttural grunt and a few more hard, demanding thrusts to make sure he got the message through your thick skull...

[1800pain]

PRIVATE SYSTEM SERVER.

Hello. As a show of my ability, I have created a private system server template for you to use. While "private" is in the name, I have included two access roles (Friend and Trusted Friend)—however I have not done any permissions for them. There is a Bot role that has permissions for them, like access to the System Setup category.

And, like the last template, only traumagenic systems can interact with this blog and use my templates. Endogenic systems and their supporters get blocked.

Note that not every single channel is in this gif, just the ones I deemed the most important to show.

Use the template here, however do note that the announcement channel and all of the forums channels will not copy over, and you will have to add them yourself: Private System Server Template

I am okay with you editing my template for your own use. Do not redistribute as your own.

If you need any help, you can leave an ask in my inbox.

Explanations for channels under the cut. LONG, BUT PRETTY DAMN IMPORTANT TO READ.

All forum channels are marked with a speech bubble emoji 💬 in front of them; those are channels that you will miss. The single announcement channel that also will be missing is marked with a mega emoji 📢.

#welcome - When someone joins the server, they will not see any channels, and you must give them a role so they can access this the server. You can see their welcome message here so you know someone's joined.

📢 update-status-fronting - If a switch happens, you put up a DNI, or want to otherwise warn people about your current state, you can update it here.

🔇 layout by 1 800 pain on tumblr - Feel free to delete this.

Text channels:

#bot - This is the only channel that has "Use application commands" permissions on it. If you would like to set it on other channels, you'd have to do it manually—or you can add it to the @​everyone tag.

💬 dms - In the title, I put "[DM/GC] Channel name" under the post, then write the participants. I have a tag system for this channel (see below).

💬 thoughts - Headmates' thinking time. I also have a tag system for this channel (see below).

💬 mailbox - Essentially, I create a channel with a headmate's name and there are two tags: Read and Unread. Read means they've read the messages people leave for them, and Unread means they have yet to read them. It's a simple way to communicate with headmates who are not fronting.

System Setup:

All servers here are unable to be chatted in; only any member with the Bot role can do that. I enjoy setting up my PluralKit work into a few separate categories:

#resources - Easy access to Simply Plural, Notion, Evernote, or various places I get PNGs to set up PluralKit profiles—things of that nature and related to it.

#pk-setup - For descriptions and things.

#pk-pfps (not in gif) - To add profile pictures and banners. I put it in its own space because it's a different type of spam, image-based spam, than pk-setup, which is mostly text-based spam.

#new-arrivals - For showing people who made their PluralKit account, mainly for documentation.

#pk-spam - Just general things that don't quite relate to the ones above; typically things like pk;r.

💬 image-resources - If you change your icons or banners a lot, this can help. I put icons/banners here with credits to the original artist, the original art, and the edited version we use in our profiles. It's tagged by Icon, Faceclaim, Banners, etc.

#pk-log (hidden, not in gif) - To store PluralKit messages. If you also would like, you can add a more general moderation bot (such as Carl-bot) to also store non-PK messages.

System-centric:

#to-do: Self-explanatory; got any plans? Put them here.

#sys-chat: More general system chatter.

#sys-work: Talk about... system work.

#headmate-observations: If you notice something about your headmate—such as a positive/negative trigger, a various quirk they have, or any idea how their role works—share it here.

💬 headspace: A headspace forum to talk about headspace. More information in the image below.

The collection of the channels that you will miss, check the images above for extended information:

📢 update-status-fronting (uncategorized)

💬 dms (in general category)

💬 thoughts (in general category)

💬 mailbox (in general category)

💬 image-resources (in System Setup category)

💬 headspace (in System-centric category)

[maidniffty]

"Hi, I'm Niffty! It's nice to meet you! It's been a while since I've made new friends!"

🪳🔪MDNI! 18+ No Minors!🔪🪳

Part of the Lutualverse (other interactions welcome!)

🪳Mod: Pseudobun (Evie) 22 she/her

🪳 18+ slight nsfw topics

🪳 Queue is mostly first come first serve, unless the bit requires otherwise.

🪳Anxiety go brrr feel free to Dm if I've crossed a line and I will do my best to fix it (Dms will not be in character)

🪳 Niffty’s opinions do not necessarily reflect mod’s opinions… on any topic. I have received hate for some of these opinions in the past so I would like to make that clear

Lutual Statement

After a pretty rough week with a lot going on, the Lutuals have decided that moving forward we will be a bit more selective regarding certain things. We love sharing our characters and developing new and interesting storylines for people to read and interact with and want to continue doing so while protecting ourselves and our mental health. Please see below on the things we expect moving forward.

Asks, anon or not, will be deleted on sight and the sender blocked if they fall into any of the following categories:

NSFW - finding the characters hot is fine! Telling the mods what you want to do to those characters sexually is not!

Violence - show typical violence may be part of storylines or backstory to inform characterization! Graphically describing violence you would like to see done to the characters doesn’t! To vent frustrations with characters, please throw a bible at them; the mods will get the message just fine.

Hate Speech - the Lutualverse is a fun spinoff of the Hazbin Hotel and Helluva Boss settings and isn’t the place for social or political commentary. We’re just here for the various shades of queer relationships; if you’re not, kindly move along.

Spam - many Lutuals utilize their queues for asks and submissions; if you sent it once, we probably got it and will answer asks and post submissions in due time. Sending more than once will just confuse Tumblr and annoy the mod.

To better form a cohesive, consistent universe with multiple storylines, the current Lutualverse is a set roster you can find here, all of whom have been vetted as 18+. As the blogs, storylines, and shows are 18+, it is recommended that minors do not interact. We are not accepting applications at this time to join the Lutualverse, though individual mods may respond to starters at their discretion; these events will not be canon to the universe.

It has also come to our attention that some blogs are claiming to be part of the Lutualverse despite not being official members.

While we appreciate that people enjoy our work, we DO NOT appreciate being impersonated or having unaffiliated members claiming to be part of our canon.

At the time of writing, the ONLY Lutuals are as follows:

@joy-eris-joy

@able-juice

@silvireal

@texanredrose

@kambiteydragon

@moreaustars

@hazbin-hoe-tell

@canibalistic-brownie

@greybazzy

@seecatrun

@pseudobun

@atttwoood

@paperroxas

Any new blogs or members will be announced by ONE OF US and will be LISTED on the Lutuals roster.

Any unaffiliated users claiming to be part of our verse WILL BE BLOCKED.

Again, we would like to stress that we enjoy the interaction and support. This is to protect us and better craft compelling stories. Thank you for your understanding.

-The Lutuals

[bakubabes-princess]

~ Kinktober Day 5 - Shouta Aizawa ~

A/N: And we're showing up on day five to remind everyone that we're still hanging on. If you want to find all of the other collaboration pieces that have come out so far check out the masterlist link below. The taglist is open until October 25th so feel free to asked to be tagged in the pieces, but remember age must be in bio or easily found on your blog to be added to the taglist! We'll be headed back to bring you another piece on day 13. 👏

Genre: One-Shot

Kink: Wall Sex

Word Count: 1.3k

TW: smut, unprotected sex, 18+ content, xfem!Reader, semi-public sex, fingering, dirty talk, daddy kink, pet name (kitten), offensive language (swearing), minors dni

Kinktober Masterlist 🎃

The Hero Gala was something that Shouta Aizawa absolutely loathed every single year. Getting dressed up and going to spend the evening with the heroes that he had to spend time with every single day whether he was at work or on patrol? Not for him. But this year was just a little bit easier with you by his side. Having someone to help him keep himself from going crazy when everyone wouldn’t leave him alone was the only way he was going to survive the night.

You rest your hand on his chest, feeling his tense nature before he had even spoken a word to you. “Shouta…” His arm wrapped around you instinctively at the sound of his name, pulling you close to his side as heroes surrounded. Everyone had just finished the speeches part of the event so now it was time for them to hit the dance floor. Another thing that Shouta Aizawa was not about. “Don’t worry, my love.” You clutched his suit jacket a little and kissed his cheek. “I won’t make you dance. I know that that’s not something you’re ever happy to do.”

Shouta place his hand over yours and rubbed gently. “It’s not a big deal darling. I can handle it.” He clearled his throat and looked around the room, catching someone in particular coming that he really didn’t want to have to deal with. “Why don’t we go and get a drink or something?”

You noticed the urgency in his voice and acted quickly. “I have a better idea, Shouta.” You took his hand and dragged him, confusion painting his face as you made your way toward the restrooms. “I know how to kill two birds with one stone. I’ve got an idea to make your night go a little easier.”

Once you were in the hallway that led to the restrooms you grabbed the front of his suit jacket, pushing him back against the wall. “There’s no one around here and it looks like the restroom is open.” You placed your hand to the side of his neck and pressed a kiss to it, nipping with your teeth. “So how about we avoid the heroes and calm those nerves of yours at the same time?”

Shouta’s eyes widened and a small smirk tugged at his lips, his eyes darting back to the dance floor and then to the restroom door before he pushed it open with his foot. “I think that’s a wonderful idea. I’ve always known that pretty little head of yours was too smart of it’s own good.”

You squealed a little and led the way in, his hands grasping your hips before the door even finished closing. Shouta pulled you back toward the door, locking it before pushing you up against the wall. His hands wandered every inch of your body, balling the bottom of your dress up as he moved it out of his way. “Sh-Shouta…” You whimpered as you felt his finger slowly moving over your legs, pushing between them in search of a small piece of fabric that seemed to be missing. You nipped at his jawline and gave him a wicked grin. “I’m not wearing any, just for you.”

A growl sounded from deep in his chest as his hand pushed up between your legs, his fingers sliding against your folds. You gasped a little at the sudden pleasure, his fingers now plunging into you. There was a deep rasp on his voice as he let his desire overwhelm him. “Look at you, we haven’t even been in here for a very long and your thighs are dripping. Such a needy girl just for daddy, huh?”

You nodded, unable to make out proper words as his fingers fucked in and out of you, his free hand pulling one leg up so that he could get a better angle. Every little whine that poured from your mouth made his finger move impossibly faster, curling perfectly inside your walls until he just couldn’t take it anymore. The feeling of your pooling slick against his digits made him long more and more for just a little taste of that perfect pussy against his now throbbing cock.

Shouta pulled his fingers away and tugged his pants down his legs, lifting you from the ground with ease and pushing your back against the wall. His fingers slid between your legs one more time as he coated them in your cum, using it to lube himself up as he teased the tip of his cock against your tight hole. “F-fuck, Sho. Please, I n-need it.”

Your pleading made him jump into action, it had always been enough to drive him crazy when you put that lewd little tone in your words. Shouta pushed himself into your core, keeping a slow pace as he used his upper body strength to hoist you up and down over his cock to match the movement of his hips. “So fucking tight… god damn it, angel.”

Your arms wrapped around his neck as you sunk your teeth into your lip harshly, trying not to give anything away as you heard people talking outside the door. Every rut of his hips made it harder and harder as you bit into your lips more, nearly drawing blood. The euphoria that coursed through you as you realized just how hard it was to keep others from knowing was unlike anything the two of you had ever had. You had never experienced something like this with him before, you had never actually done anything outside of the comfort of your home.

Shouta placed his head in the crook of your neck, shockwaves of pleasure hitting every inch of his figure as he used your skin to muffle his grunting. Your walls were closing around him, he could feel you tightening with every roll of his hips, every drop of your body onto him. Your head dropped back against the wall as he sunk his teeth in your neck, a small shriek of ecstasy leaving you. His voice was deep as he grabbed your chin in his hand. “Uh, uh, better be quiet or we’re gonna get caught before we can finish this up.” He squeezed and placed his lips to yours, his tongue darting into your mouth as you moaned against him. “Now why don’t you do what I know you can and let go on me, darling.”

That was all it took. Your cunt convulsed around him, something about that dark, deep tone in his voice made the floodgates break. You sunk your teeth into your lips harsher than you had before to hold back the string of moans that wanted to break free from you, a slew of curses just barely audible as you came all over his shaft.

Shouta smiled devilishly as he continued to pounded into you, letting you ride out your high for as long as possible before he emptied himself out inside of your walls. You grabbed onto him tightly, watching the bliss on his face as he came down from his own high. Shouta lifted you from him and placed your feet back on the ground, running the back of his hand over his chin. “That’s my good, kitten.”

You leaned into his hand and gave him love drunk eyes, feeling his other hand help you bring you dress back down your legs. You placed a hand on his chest and took his tie in your other, helping him straighten it out. “I-I don’t know if I can go back out there just yet Sho. I can barely stand up.”

He chuckled at you and shook his head. “Well darling, we’ve been holding up the bathroom for far too long. I’ll peek my head out while you do what you need to and make sure no one's around. But we’ve gotta free this thing up.” Shouta stepped toward the door and gripped the handle, smirking before he turned back to you. “Better get moving, my love.”

Taglist: @bakubabes-tatakae @cherriluvs35

©2023 bakubabes-princess, please do not repost/modify without my permission, please do not use my work as ASMR without my permission

[peavhyshy]

iris. writer. she/her. °𓇼 ˖ ｡ﾟ•┈꒰ა ♡ ໒꒱┈

⋆𖦹 °.🐚⋆❀˖° 🐚 ⋆｡𖦹 °.🐚⋆❀˖°

་༘࿐ ִֶָ🐇˖𓂃 ִֶָ babydoll ִֶָ 𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🐇་༘࿐

♡ ໒꒱┈• ｡ﾟ outer banks m.list ☆ marvel m.list • ｡ﾟ┈໒꒱☆ gen v m.list ♡ ໒꒱┈• ☆ 𐙚 star wars m.list • ｡ﾟ┈໒꒱♡ ☆ euphoria m.list

𓇼 ⋆.˚ 𓆉 𓆝 𓆡⋆.˚ 𓇼 rules 𓇼 ⋆.˚ 𓆉 𓆝 𓆡⋆.˚ 𓇼

ᯓ★ asks: Use the ask box for submissions, feel free to drop a request but please be patient as it may take some time to write because I procrastinate.

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₊˚⊹ᰔ under construction: My blog is currently undergoing some changes, I'm updating my aesthetics and reworking my masterlist and fics, which will take some time. While I'm focused on this, I may not be posting new content right away, but I promise to share something fresh once I'm finished.

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last updated: december 5th, 2024

[vitaminseetarot]

PAC Pick a Palette: One Small Thing That Will Help You Grow ☕🌞💴

Welcome back to my pick a card readings! This time we're looking at the time between our New Moon sowing and our Full Moon flowering. At this stage of the magic making process, work has gone underway to build upon the seed that was germinated and growth happens. Soon it will reveal the peak of its work through the flower, but before then the stem and leaves also deserve attention. They're the ones helping to power the whole thing!

It's important, then, to look at what you're using and where you are in the process. Not everything is meant to grow at the same rate, but sometimes the right ingredients like plant food or pruning clippers can do an incredible job at providing a needed boost.

Pick one of these three color palette swatches to find out what you can add or remedy to assist the growth of your own magic!

(Forgive me if the spread out looks a bit funky this time, it's all about finding the part of the house with the best natural lighting!)

Pile 1: Coffee Beans

Draw: Four of Wands; Queen of Pentacles, Page of Wands, Death 18 - Communication, Aries Rising - Act, Heartsease - Compassion "Tread a little more tenderly."

You need more space to grow whatever it is you're creating. A bird can try to lay an egg without a nest, but it's never going to be easy. Building a sturdy nest increases the young's chance of survival. You should try considering the space in which you're using to create your project or desire: are you writing a novel in a cluttered room, or cooking a meal when you can't find half of your measuring cups and saucepans? Are you meditating in a place where it's difficult to tune out the background noise?

Four of Wands talks about creating the space for you to thrive like the corn in Queen of Pentacles. The Queen is able to cultivate her garden in peace and certainty that abundance is hers. You are meant to take what it is you're doing and allow it to grow, so the Queen is being quite literal here. But she wants you to do it from a place of joy and enthusiasm instead of dread.

The Page is fired up from drinking coffee and is ready to go. But you must be in a place of ease with yourself to do this. Your message is to act upon your growth, but do it from a gentle place and at a gentle pace. Do not try to over exert yourself when you do have the space to practice or create. Do not try, for example, to squeeze 45 minutes of exercise into 5 minutes, thinking that it's all the time you're allowed, so why not go overboard, amiright? This is the fast lane to killing what you're growing and your joy for it, pile 1, and what you're growing is still in a very delicate stage. You have time to work out the details, so don't rush this. Heartease was the first card to pop out and the only card to jump, so it's really emphasizing the need to be careful with how you spend your time and energy.

The Communication card is the only one that really stands out to me. Perhaps what you're developing has to do with communications. Writing a book, preparing a speech, blogging, interview, etc. but it could also have to do with growing your connections with other people through how you communicate. You could be rekindling an old friendship from school or meeting someone for coffee? In any case, Compassion is the keyword here. Be gentle and ready to listen more to feedback, while creating a safe space for your friend or colleague to communicate clearly with you. This is a meetup you'll want to act upon, but do so from a place of kindness.

Also for some reason, maybe it's because I heard the song recently while out, but Tom Petty's "Free Fallin" is in my head while typing your reading and only your reading. Argh, such an earworm! If this person you're meeting up with hurt your heart in some way way back in the past… yeah it's cool to be on the defensive, assert your boundaries. Heartease, however, still asks that you treat this situation with diplomacy.

Pile 2: Radiance

Draw: Eight of Wands; Queen of Pentacles, King of Swords, Knight of Pentacles 19 - Healing Grief, Pisces Rising - Dream, Wisteria - Longevity "Plan for and take the dedicated path."

You have some similarities to pile 1, so if you were interested in that pile I recommend checking it out for messages. For starters, you have Queen of Pentacles in the exact same space on your spread, so that tells me there's a lot of collective push for undertaking rapid growth at this time. The Queen does it from an appearance of near effortlessness, but it's not without considerable effort on her part. She's able to handle a lot with grace and consistency.

It seems like in your cards, pile 2, you're pretty solid when it comes to growing towards your goals. You've become used to trucking along without must reprieve, as if it's from one thing to another as smoothly as the train cars pass the railroad crossing. You're being asked to remember about the power of momentum, and about the little things that add up. Think of how a bird takes off. When it starts flapping, it flaps hard. Once it's high in the sky, it spreads out and soars with ease. It requires a lot of steady pushing, one flap at a time, but eventually when it takes off it gains more speed than ever.

Again like with pile 1, you have all the time you need to make your dreams grow and flourish. Just don't be surprised if this takes a rather long time to accomplish. The Queen of Pentacles is less interested in quantity or time efficiency as she is in quality. It's not that she isn't punctual, far from it, but she and the Knight know that the best fruits are ones that ripen when they're ready to. You're being encouraged to plan for the long term, with wise judgement as the King of Swords suggests, and to open yourself up to envisioning more brilliant avenues to fly through. Imagine what would make your heart soar, and grow that instead of something that you merely feel "obligated" to do. Great things can take time, but it'll be completely worth the wait.

Also, my sun catcher reflected a rainbow perfectly on the osprey in this Eight of Wands card, it's nice. There is a radiance that comes from taking time to grow something to how you want it to be, like the bird with its fish catching talents (it can pluck them right out of the water and fly around boasting its catch). Your skills will shine here, just be sure to care for yourself in the meantime.

Pile 3: Perfect Penny

Draw: Nine of Wands; II High Priestess, XIV Temperance, Seven of Wands 25 - Truth, Taurus Moon - Relax, Belladonna - Silence "Listen more and quiet be."

So this was an interesting spread because at first I couldn't tell if the message was to hold on or let go. Maybe that's your current dilemma when it comes to growth. And it's a valid one, cause it's a lot like the pruning stage. You have to decide which leaves are valuable to your health, and which leaves are dead and must be clipped away.

The penny is like… saving a wishing penny for a rainy day. You're on the defense with Nine of Wands. Do I use this penny now to accomplish this, you ask, or I should I save it for later when I might use it for something else? Nine of Wands is a lot of energy being deliberately held back for a reason, like an arrow ready to fire. It could be that you're maybe putting a little too much perfectionism into the idea. What you're growing has not yet been grounded into the material world, it's still a passion idea or a fire in your heart but you're holding it back. But Nine of Wands is also a Sagittarius card, doubly so since Sagittarius is the 9th sign. The requirement here for growth is pushing forward with optimism that your wish will not go to waste. There's an energy of perfectionism here especially as it took me exactly nine photos before I settled for this one. I finally decided it didn't have to be perfect, it just had to feel ok enough!

My first reaction was to say "trust your gut and you'll learn to balance the give and take," then High Priestess and Temperance came out together! Somewhere inside you already know what it is you would like to do with "the penny" of an idea you're casting into the wishing well. You don't have to overthink this. It's a matter of coming from a heart-centered place of Truth. Belladonna is showing you how to tap into your intuition: "listen more, silent be." Listen closely to what your heart is wishing to do. Balance this out with how others may perceive your goals or growth. There may be people who say something like, "you're going to use what you got on 'that'?" or "are you really sure that's what you want to do?"

It takes practice to choose from a place of intuitive open mindedness, but it will reward you in this case. You're being reminded to stay relaxed and steady about this. Making the next move doesn't have to come from a place of high pressure or unneeded stress, even if it's time sensitive. But by learning to listen to your intuition more, the part that tells you how to proceed from a place of optimism within reason, you'll be able to more quickly expand and grow upon what it is you're creating. With penny's copper corresponding to Venus as well as Taurus moon, it's suggested here that you could receive monetary or financial growth through this, as well.

This reading has not been evaluated by the FDA to diagnose, prevent, treat, or cure any disease or infection. Please ask your physician before going online.

2023, @VitaminseeTarot ™

[chainsandmorechains]

𝐈 𝐰𝐢𝐬𝐡 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐞𝐥𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐦𝐲 𝐥𝐚𝐢𝐫 𝐡𝐮𝐦𝐚𝐧...mortal? Alien? Female maybe? Then male? None of the two? An attack helicopter you say?

You know what, I don't care just be yourself.

So now that you know that I don't care about your possible gender, race, as well as your sexual orientation and that you will probably not interrupt me again in my speech.

𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘨h 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩 let's continue.

𝐈 𝐰𝐢𝐬𝐡 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐞𝐥𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐦𝐲 𝐥𝐚𝐢𝐫 𝐡𝐮𝐦...

𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩

𝐈 𝐰𝐢𝐬𝐡 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐞𝐥𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐦𝐲 𝐥𝐚𝐢𝐫, I am your friendly neighborhood crazy human with a god complex and domination issues.

During my long life...22 years is long I swear...I gathered quite the selection of fetishes and kinks, from domination (of course domination, did you read the title of the blog ? What were you expecting !?) to worship, passing by sadism and adoration...

In this cozy place, you will have the honor to find some pieces of media I enjoyed, read my majestic ramblings about all kinds of unholy subjects, and of course talk to the great me with the uses of dm's or by simply diving head first into my pool of knowledge.

Pretty cool right

Of course, the aforementioned benefits come with their batch of rules.

First and foremost if you wish to contact me you shall respect me and my limits, which are, myself being dominated...this is a big no, and something I would rather die than experience, and the second is sharing...I may or may not have issues with possessiveness...also if it wasn't clear until now minors aren't accepted too.

Actually, they aren't even allowed in this place before they gather experiences, and values, therefore reaching suitable age...but please, we're on the internet...who would believe that there aren't minors watching the dark parts of Tumblr.

At least I can ban them in messages, they are pretty easy to recognize by their...particular writing and mannerism.

Do that and you will be treated with the respect you deserve.

Secondly, you shall respect others.

This place is a free place to share your views and opinions, you can engage in hours-long debates with other persons in comments, or with the use of tags that's great and I encourage that, I will even participate.

But debating isn't insulting their whole family of horny rabbits willing to suck every dick of the animal kingdom just because they said something that you didn't agree with.

Don't respect that and you will be smitten with the blocking hammer.

That is all you need to sacrifice to enjoy the wonder of my cozy abode.

Of course it's only if you're undisturbed by dark kinks.

I would have warned you, the rest is in your hands.

[fieldofsecretss]

!1k SPECIAL!

Theme: all of the above, you might’ve to sit down for this loves, it’ll be very very veeery long, grab a drink and a snack or something ; )

Pairings: Draco Malfoy x Female!Reader

Warnings: This will contain SMUT, [18+] themes, FLUFF, dark DARK subjects and stuff, maybe a bit ANGST

[this little celebration fic will have multiple fics in it]

A/n: feel free to skip this speech and just jump straight into the fic below the cut, but I’m happy if you’d like to read it anyway <3

I remember when I was jumping and squealing in happiness when I reached 100 followers. A year ago I posted with zero expectations and yet here I am with 1000 beautiful people following MY blog and reading MY work🙄 first of, why? But let’s be positive here!

I know I haven’t been as active as I’ve promised y’all to be, but I’m trying my best, believe it or not but I have a life outside tumblr too😂 I’m trying my best loves <3 anyway if you’ve read this, thank you for being patient with meeee!

——————————————————————

His head cocked to the side as his eyes marveled over all of the...things laid out before him. He couldn't seem to understand the numerous brushes varying in designs and sizes. He was confused by the small black container with a circle containing some sort of pink powder. Draco had absolutely seen makeup before, but he never knew how extensive it was, he had only ever seen some lipstick and eyeshadow tops!

"What are you looking at, Love?" Your voice called out when you entered the bathroom smiling, to see him staring at your makeup laying on the countertop.

"Is ALL OF THIS your makeup?" Draco asked shocked, not believing that there could possibly be more.

You smiled quite sweetly.

"Some of it, yeah. Haven't you seen makeup before?" You giggled, feeling entertained by his surprise.

"Of course I have. I've never seen my mother without it on, but this is so...fascinating." He drawled, sitting down in the chair in front of your makeup mirror.

You watched with content as he studied the things that stood out to him, answering most of his questions when he had them.

"What's this for, y/n?" He wondered, picking up a metallic-pink tube of mascara.

“See how long my lashes are?" You pointed out, batting your thick black lashes so he could see the effect.

He raised a brow at that, setting down the tube and continuing to rifle through your stuff, you couldn’t help but compare him to a little raccoon. You went on to explain how blush went on your cheeks for a rosy glow, and how the bottle of setting spray kept everything in place the whole day. He was perfectly amused and amazed at how much time went into your makeup routine everyday.

A radiant grin spread on his features when he suddenly spotted something familiar.

"Now I know what this is." He announced, holding up your favorite lipgloss.

It was a light, pinkish-peachy shade with small sparkles that he knew you wore almost everyday. It was also his personal favorite on you...it was cherry flavored too, so that’s a plus.

"Oh, I know you do," You smiled, "Actually, would you mind handing it to me? I need to touch up a bit."

Draco, though, didn't hand it over.

"Can I...put it on for you?" He requested, playing with the wand of the tube, listening as it make sticky sounds.

You beamed as you sat on the counter, prompting him to stand up to be level with your face.

"Go for it." You granted.

The young Malfoy couldn't hold back the small smile as he dragged the lipgloss across your lip, his eyes narrowing a little in concentration.

Draco was surprisingly good at it, his steady hand creating an even layer of lipgloss on both lips. Not too much and thick not too little. You rubbed them together when he was done, popping them dramatically when he stepped back to look.

"Pretty?" You asked when you saw the satisfaction on his expression.

He cupped your face with his slender ring clad hand, looking into your y/e/c eyes that he loved endlessly.

"Pretty."

You pressed your lips onto his in a sticky lipglossy kiss, leaving his lips with some sparkly lipgloss on them.

“now you’re pretty too!” You said happily as you wiped his lips with your delicate fingers

——————————————————————

Draco was sat down on the couch in the Slytherin common room with a lit cigarette in between his ring clad fingers, inhaling a deep and slow drag of smoke every once in a while. With him was Blaise, Theo, Crabbe and Goyle. Just talking shit about Gryffendoor’s, a normal Saturday...basically.

While they rambled on and off about boring shit the door opened and in came a walking y/n, makeup natural but still refreshing and wakening. A white crop top with a blush pink unzipped jacket and jeans. A sight for sore eyes as Draco would say every time he saw you, his loving girlfriend.

“Well hello there, love” Draco greeted you as you plopped down onto his lap. You looked up at him and pouted, he raised one eyebrow.

“Kissie, please” you said closing your eyes, and soon his lips crashed on yours and his large hand cupped your jaw per usual. Gods you’d die for him without a second thought. He tasted like smoke and mint, him you thought. Suddenly his tongue swiped over your lower lip, smudging your cherry lipgloss earning a irritated groan from you while you pulled away. You patted his cheek making him chuckle a little.

You pulled up a little pocket mirror so that you could apply a new coat of lipgloss when you heard a high pitched giggle. You put down your mirror and looked up in front you, raven black hair, yup. Of course it had to be Pansy fucking Parkinson.

“Well, well, dracie. Still together with that bitch I see, I’m genuinely shocked that you two are together still. I mean you can do so much better than...that” Pansy mocked while giving you a disgusted look.

Before Draco could open his mouth to even talk back you interrupted him with a rather calm voice and a mocking smile.

“You hate on me but are still watching? Honey you’re a fan” you snapped leaning back on Draco’s chest while laughing sarcastically. Draco knew he never had to defend you but he’d never sit down and watch his girlfriend take shit from a attention seeking prick like Pansy, but he knew you hated it when he interrupted your and Pansy’s famous fights.

“You’re just jealous that i fell for y/n instead of you, move on!” Draco sighed loudly.

“Oh please, jealous of that skank? No thank you, I mean look at her! She’s a bitch that has too much confidence! What do you even see in her? She’s not even pretty, she’s not even skinny enough and not to forget that she’s a fucking brat” everyone could see Pansy’s blood boiled.

“She’s fucking perfect, not common trash like you Parkinson, her body is perfect, the prettiest fucking woman I’ve ever seen. She doesn’t seek for attention like you” Draco said kissing your cheek.

“I mean yeah. I love my curves, my imperfections, my jiggling thighs, no one said you have to. If you low-key don’t like me, I highly don’t care. Queens don’t compete with hoes, sweetie” you said in a singsong voice. Then everybody in the room started laughing except Pansy who speed walked out in anger.

You turned around to face Draco with an expression of victory.

“Y’okay, love?” He asked rubbing your cheek with his thumb and eyebrows furrowed in concern.

“Some people are like clouds you know, when they disappear, it’s a brighter day” you giggled in response and nuzzled your face in the crook of his neck.

“You are a genius, love” he said while tickling your waist making you squirm and laugh until you heard a cough.

“We’re still here y’know?” Blaise said at the couple.

——————————————————————

Draco’s POV

I’m hanging out with my friends when I hear shouting. I look up and see y/n, my enemy, arguing with a gryffindor girl.

It looks like the gryffindork is loosing this battle. Suddenly her, what looks like her boyfriend, stands up and pushing the gryffindor girl behind him.

He’s now shouting at y/n. I clench my fists and stand up.

“Where are you going?” Blaise asks. “I have priorities” I reply simply.

I make my way over to y/n and snake an arm around her waist and pulling her towards my chest.

“If you don’t stop yelling at my girl, I’ll make sure you’ll never talk again” I say coldly.

The guy goes to say something back but the gryffindor girl pulls him away from the scene they created.

Y/n turns around and gives me a grateful nod making me chuckle.

“I know some other ways to thank me, love” I whisper in her ear getting flashbacks from last night, all I could hear was her beautiful moans and pleads of pleasure

——————————————————————

Draco’s hips slammed in and out of your tight cunt with an inhuman pace; his chest is draped across your front, arms up and around your back and holding you flush to him, skin to skin, sweat against sweat. You’re absolutely gone as he pounds into your wet and sensitive pussy. You’re too cockdrunk to even react to his harsh thrusts, although every snap of his hips pushes you closer and closer to the release you so desperately need, you’d do anything to just have an amazing and breathtaking orgasm.

Draco’s pace gets slower, deepening until the head of his cock is nestled almost painfully against your cervix. His cock felt so much bigger than usual, you think absentmindedly — the way he’s pushed himself so deep into you, so far into you has you squirming. This was sex in a whole new level.

“shh, shh, bunny. Gonna stuff you so full of my cum, alright? gonna make you feel so good. Gonna give my pretty princess a baby. Would you like that? you want daddy’s baby?”

“yes, yes daddy, please. I want it, I-I need it,” you whimper, you could practically not think, just blabbering and clawing at his chest. Draco pushes your knees against your tummy making your knees touch your tits, revelling in the way your puffy and abused pussy swallows him whole, folds hugging him tight, sticky wetness oozing out around his cock. Your expression is dazed, fuzzy, jaw slack and hooded eyes, shedding tears of pleasure.

“Okay, bunny” he groans, “gonna fill you right up, and you’re gonna take it all like a good girl.”

He collapses, resting all his weight on top of your pathetic body, pressing your back into the bed. You can feel his cock twitch inside of you and then a pleasurable warmth floods your insides. Draco lets out an almost pornographic moan, forcing himself back up, regaining the strength, to angle your hips upwards. when he pulls out, your hole gapes and shrinks. you feel empty - too empty - after being stretched by his fat cock. you inhale sharply, gripping Draco’s forearm tightly.

he uses two fingers for scooping the steady stream of cum leaking from you and push it inside your sensitive hole again.

“daddy, too much. Please, please too much,” you whimper, your cunt is far too sensitive and the added pleasure is bordering to pain. Draco groans, pinching your nipple making you squirm and whine.

“stay still. gotta keep it in, princess. make sure it takes, hm? you’re all messy.” he tilts your hips at a steeper angle. “Such a messy girl…my messy girl, isn’t that right, princess?” He said in a husky voice.

“Mm, yes daddy. M’only yours…”

“Wanna hear you say it. So so.” He prodded and you gave in of course.

“Only your messy girl, daddy”

——————————————————————

“I’m gonna fill this little cunt of yours with my cum, okay? And you’re gonna take it, no whining and most importantly, no moving.” Draco ruts into you from behind, arm slung around your waist as he empties his load into you, making you writhe around from the fact you were still on edge, having not hit your high yet.

“All in due time, m’love. I’ll make you feel good, just wait a little bit longer.” He presses wet kisses to the back of your neck, whispering sweet nothings into your ear as he drags time on, wanting to make sure he’d done enough to get you pregnant with his child.

Draco slowly begins thrusting into you again, low squelches emitted as you start back on the path to tipping off the edge, needing your own pleasure to hit you already.

“See baby, that wasn’t so bad. Now just breathe, and let me take good care of you..after all, this may be one of last times we can do it before that baby in you starts growing.”

——————————————————————

“So…how was your date?” Draco asked you, his jaw was clenched and he couldn’t find himself to keep eye contact for longer than a second you noticed.

“Oh, yeah. Fine I guess” you answered while fidgeting with your bracelet on your left wrist. Yesterday you went on a date with a guy named Johnny, you knew him from some of your classes. He was a Gryffindor, quite popular actually. Known for being good looking and a girl magnet, but recently he’s been thirsting over you for some reason.

For weeks he’s been trying to get your attention, flirting and holding books and doors open for you. You didn’t like him, you just couldn’t see the hype about him, he was an asshole after all. A snobby kid with social issues who thinks he’s the best of the best, of the halfbloods.

Draco could say the same within a heartbeat.

But when he asked you out on a date, you just said yes for him to leave you alone afterwards. The start of the date was going okay-boring but not horrible. You had some dinner and talked, but he didn’t even give you a chance to speak, he was selfishly rambling about his fortune and girls that wished that they had your place in that moment. Let’s say you couldn’t wait to tell Draco and laugh about all of this shit. But the night took a weird turn when he found out you were a virgin…he insisted to change that for you.

“You sure? You’re acting the opposite” Draco pondered, he knew you and all of your behaviors.

“Uhm, can I ask you something? It’s like very very personal so please don’t be weird about it, dray” you said while you took a deep breath. He looked at you with disbelief.

“Y/n, you know you can ask me anything. We can tell each other anything and everything without feeling judged” he huffed out. You just nodded.

“So? Go on!” He said impatiently. He wouldn’t dare to say it out loud, but he loved that you only told him

about your problems, he loved the trust.

“Is…is sex supposed to…hurt?” You almost whispered. Draco’s eyes widened at the question, he was prepared for you to ask him about something…less sexual. You didn’t dare to look at him. Did he hear you right?

“Sorry, come again?” He asked as he put all of his focus on your words. You sighed, now it just got weird

“I said, is sex supposed to be that…painful?” Your cheeks were burning hot and your palms were balmed.

“No…! absolutely not, did that halfblood do something he shouldn’t have done?! I swear by Merlin’s beard tha-“ Draco was visibly upset.

“No-no! I agreed to do it. It’s just that it didn’t...- everything happened so fast and it was nothing like I pictured it, and I regret it so much! I wish I could’ve saved my first time for someone special, not with some snobby bloke against a wall in a restroom” you frowned when you saw Draco’s shocked face.

“First time? I’m sorry it was that bad y/n.” He said giving you a sympathetic look. Suddenly a light bulb appeared above Draco.

“I can show you how it’s supposed to feel like, if you want of course” Draco prayed you’d say yes, he’d take such good care of you...but he’d absolutely never force you. Never ever.

You laughed humorlessly, but you stopped when you saw his neutral facial expression. You thought for a second...was he serious?! Is he joking?

“You mean that?...”

“Of course I do.”

“....O-okay.....” you flusterly agree

“No none of that, you’ve gotta tell me y/n...do you want me to show you, really? I want to hear you say it..I need to hear you say it and mean it” he stood close to you, you could feel the warmth radiate from his body.

You look up at him to look him in his beautiful eyes...you nod.

“I want you to show me Draco”

(This one sucked though)

——————————————————————

Hot silent tears danced their way down your cheeks, leaving a black-ish trail of mascara under your eyes. You were tense.. your shoulders trembled and rattled through every deep breath you took, you were almost dizzy while you briskly walked. You were headed to the only place you felt safe. The only place you felt the most accepted and cared for, Draco’s dorm.

The walk there was long and risky, filch could catch you at any moment, it was a 50/50 chance. You were bound to get there though, because this couldn’t wait. You could’ve waited until the next morning, but you hoped the icy air in the hallways could calm you down a bit, which it did to a certain degree. Finally nearing his door your breath mellows out a little bit while you sniffled through the fast tears. You know the moment you see him everything is going to come rushing back to you again, but for now you find an eye in the storm. When you lift your gaze from your shoes you were right in front of the dark wooden door you were oh so familiar with.

Taking a big breath, you lifted you fist and knocked four times-for good measure. No matter how many times you’ve been there doing the exact same thing, this time it felt extra loud as your knocks echoed in the airy building. You heard shuffling from the other side, you lifted your hand and focused on your knuckles, feeling yourself starting to drift into your own mind. Before you venture too far into your own mind, the hinge of the door opened, bringing you back as you gaze upon those beautiful metallic eyes of his.

He immediately absorbs your appearance. Each emotion of concern, worry and shock spread across his features.

“Love, what’s wrong? Are you alright? What are you doing here this late, you could’ve gotten spotted”

Each question of his whirls past you, overwhelming you and simultaneously easing the ache in your bones just by hearing his deep voice.

You immediately tackle him into a hug, nuzzling your face into his casually clad chest. A white t-shirt he opted to wear for the night.

His body reacts faster than his brain as he expands his large over your back, protecting you from what seems to be bothering you. The deep rumble in his chest indicates he’s starting up his interrogation again.

“Sweetheart, you’re scaring me. What’s going on?” His voice firm yet gentle.

“I-I’m fine, I just-well..” your voice slightly muffled by his shirt but his attentive ear catches them.

“Come on, let’s get you inside, yeah?”

“Yeah ok..”

He slightly breaks the embrace to gently lead you into the familiar second ‘home’ and leads you to sit down onto his tightly made bed.

Still holding onto your shoulders he sits you down onto the dark green covers of his bed, he leans his body closer to yours, meeting your eyes as he ducks his head a little to be in eye level. He scans your face, the worry evident and unmoving. Yet he waits for your words..

“I have no idea where to start, dray”

“And that’s okay, take a deep breath and relax. Can you tell me what’s going on in that pretty head of yours?” He asks softly, almost uncharacteristically softly.

At the moment you just think of how gentle he is with you, how he is the rock in your life.

“I’m thinking of you…a-and how gentle and loving you are towards me” the tears now again making their appearance known by rolling down your cheeks. But this time his ring clad hand catches the tears before they fall.

“I-I came over because I need you Draco...I needed my Draco because I don’t-.” your breath catches in your throat as you fight the lump resting there “because I don’t have anyone else I can tell this to”

His hands found yours. He nods along with your words. Really absorbing every word that leaves your plump lips.

“Okay baby. You know I’m always here for you and I’m glad you can trust me this much, whatever it is you can tell me”

“I know” you say giving him a watery smile. He waits patiently for you to begin to talk again, anticipating every word. You take a deep breath and sigh.

“I just couldn’t hold the weight of this anymore, dray. It’s too heavy for me”

“What weight, love?” He asks as he feel his heart starting to sink

“Me being...” you pause, the word catching on your tongue. This was it. The moment that had driven you mad. Made you feel like a freak. The real reason you felt like an outcast, and outsider. The truth you’ve been harboring for years. You had suppressed it, not realizing until you got older and your brain got more developed, you’ve run from it but now your legs were tired. The fear that held its grip on you was about to unclench now, with him..your Draco.

“I’m bi-bisexual, Draco”

The words hang in the air, the world felt as it zoomed in on the two of you.

“Oh sweetheart…I’m so proud of you. I love you, thank you for telling me”

“Oh Dray, I love you too and I don’t want you to think that I’m not committed to you or-“ he cuts you off mid ramble.

“No Sh sh sh, love I wasn’t thinking that”

“Okay” you replied.

There’s a beat while you two process what had been said, so you continued to explain what lead you to come out to him.

“So I’ve been dealing with this for a long time...I-it’s just..it’s been heavy on my mind lately and was getting too much to hold in”

He nods, acknowledging how vulnerable you are this very moment.

“Tonight it just bubbled up and eventually spilled over I guess..” he hangs onto every word you say.

“I received a letter tonight and I snuck out to see you because my parents...they-“ you feel yourself begin to choke up as you think of their harsh words.

“Breathe y/n, it’s okay you got this” he comforts.

“They said some really nasty things about gay people and I had to pretend it didn’t affect me at all, but when I was alone and read the letter and those things they said I just broke down, I just lost it” tears run down your face in a fast pace, your hand begin to shake in pent up anger, sadness and pain

His grip on your hands became firmer, he grounded you, encouraging you. He leaned his forehead against yours, brushing his beautiful nose against yours in a loving gesture.

“My beautiful girl, so strong..I’m so incredibly proud of you. And I’m so sorry your parents are pricks”

“But that’s the thing Draco, you’ve met them and they aren’t necessarily bad people but-“

“They are idiots”

“Yeah…you’re right..they are.”

Draco now feeling more protective of you than ever says,

“How dare they make my sweet girl feel this way, huh? Wait until my father hear about this shit” he looks into your sad eyes.

“You’re perfect to me, if being bi is who you are, then it’s who you are, love”

You give him a little smile which he reciprocates happily. You were convinced he was an angel sent down to you. How divine it was having someone loving you for you.

“Thank you Draco, I love you”

“Of course, I love you too y/n”

You give each other a shy eyes, he starts to lean in before stopping close enough for you to feel his minty breath on your lips.

“This okay..?” He ask for your permission

“Always, dray” you breathe out and your lips connects in a bruising, loving and emotional kiss..

And then it was sealed...

——————————————————————

“Baaaabe.” You heard Draco moan from the bedroom. You sighed slightly and turned the heat down on the soup you were heating on the stove before making your way into the room. You leaned against the doorframe as you looked at your boyfriend from his spot in the bed. He was laying with all the pillows and blankets he could find and was completely bundled up. He was sick with a really bad cold and you had offered to come over and help take care of him. You just weren’t expecting him to be so demanding about it. Or no, you actually did. It’s Draco we’re talking about.

“What do you need, dray?” You sighed, he had been calling you back here every few minutes since you got here an hour ago.

“I’m lonely.” He pouted, jutting his bottom lip out for emphasis, his voice strained from being congested. Gray eyes a little red and watery.

“Lonely? How could you possibly be lonely? I’ve been in here every 5 minutes.” You said slightly exasperated.

“But you don’t staaay.” He whined. You smirked at that, who knew the scary and mean Draco malfoy, one of the sacred 28 was such a baby when he was sick? Not you, that’s for sure.

“How can I stay if you keep sending me to get you stuff?” You shot back, not able to keep away the amused tone from your voice.

Draco thought about that for a moment, obviously the sickness was not making him think as clearly as he wanted. “I don’t know, but you need to do both.” He said with a grin, obviously playing around

“Well how about I finish making you the soup you asked me for and we can snuggle a little while you eat? I can even play with your hair like you like. Okay, you big baby?” You offered, rolling your eyes. You saw his tired expression brighten slightly at the suggestion

“Okay! Thank you.” He responded, coughing slightly from the excitement. You turned to walk away before Draco stopped you. “And baby? I love you.”

You smiled at him, the sweetest smile you could put on, before, “I know.” You laughed as you walked out of the room and down the hall.

“Bunny?!” Draco exclaimed loudly, coughing again. “You have to say it back!” He yelled as loud as he could at you, voice raspy. Only your amused laughter (bordering on a cackle) was your response.

You walked back in a few minutes later to a very pouty boyfriend, you walked over to him and passed him the soup before getting in the bed next to him. “Eat up, baby. It’ll help you get better.”

“Not until you say it.” He said petulantly. You laughed lightly and ran your hand through his hair, lightly scratching his scalp at you did. You didn’t miss the small content flutter of his eyelids at your motions, smiling softly to yourself.

“I love you too, pretty boy.” You said adoringly. “Even when you are a pain in my ass.”

Draco beamed at you, “Good, ’cause I plan on being a pain in your ass until one of us dies. So get used to it.” You laughed loudly at that, not missing the butterflies you felt. You couldn’t wait for forever with this wonderfully ridiculous man. “Honestly, I could have died and the last thing you said to me was ‘I know’ when I told you I loved you? Who do you think you are?”

“Okay okay, calm down big boy. I’m sorry, I love so so very very much!” You said and gave him a big smooch on his lips, not caring if you’d get sick too.

——————————————————————

With a smirk donning on his face he said “So, you love me huh?”

“I think it is pretty evident by now”

“Nah I’m not convinced,” he said staring deep into my eyes. I knew what he wanted

I nudged my nose on his neck, licking his earlobe slowly as his breath hitches

“Tell me daddy…how can I convince you?” I almost purred, voice breathy and hot.

“Wanna be daddies good girl?”

I whined, his words going straight to my core, making me feel the hot wetness pooling. I loved how quickly and smoothly the dynamic shifts between us.

“Mhm, please daddy…wanna be your good girl-

——————————————————————

Pain, sadness, anger

That’s all you felt right now. You were seated on the edge of your best friends bed, Draco. Sniffles and sobs was all you could muster.

“H-how could I be so fucking stupid!” You said, voice broken and laced with anger...

“It’s not your fault he’s a fucking player, y/n” Draco said while rubbing your back soothingly, in a attempt to calm you down just a bit.

“But I fell for his game, Draco! I didn’t realize how badly he treated me all along, I wish I could’ve just turn back time and fucking kick him right in the-“

“Okay! Okay, I get it darling. No need to get aggressive. I warned you about him everyday, but you would be so stubborn and not listen to a single word I had to say about him.” Draco said and you just looked at him with an apologetic look.

“I’m sorry...” you said full of shame

“For what exactly, darling?” He asked confused as if he had missed something

“For not listening” you answered. And he knew this was so wrong in so many levels, but the way you looked at him with tears decorating your cheeks, a few buttons on your school shirt undone showing cleavage and the way you apologized made his cock harden…

“You have always treated me right and making me realize my worth, I don’t know why I didn’t listen to you this time-“

You were cut off by Draco smashing his lips on yours, you were taken aback by his sudden action at first but soon you returned the kiss. It was hungry, rushed and it were full of…something you couldn’t describe...

He pulled back to catch his breath and look at you for consent. You gave him a encouraging nod. Lips were connected again, he laid you down on the bed and let his hand roam your body. You took the freedom to feel his abs through his shirt and you couldn’t resist to lightly whimper.

“You have been a very bad girl now baby…not listening to what daddy tells you, what happened to the obedient girl who always listened to her daddy hm?” He asked, y/n’s submissive side came to surface immediately.

“M’sorry daddy..” Your thighs rubbed against each other, an uncomfortable feeling in your panties caused by your arousal smearing on your thighs.

“Didn’t ask for apologies, angel” he said and flipped you around so you were laying on your stomach and Draco behind you.

“Ass up baby girl” he said, voice determined and husky.

And you obeyed, arching your back and pushing your ass up. You felt him move and switch behind you, spreading your cheeks apart and pressing his thumb at your entrance.

“So wet f’me already?” He mocked with a cocky smile. He hiked your skirt up to reveal your perfectly built ass...

He gave your ass a rough squeeze making you let out a airy moan. He stopped and pulled you to the edge of the bed. He bent down to give your lower back a kiss before standing up again running his hands along your body.

“I hate to see you cry, angel...” he said. But that’s not true, he took quite pleasure in seeing you cry. Having you tremble and sob was the most goddamn beautiful thing he'd ever seen.

“Sorry I was a bad girl and didn’t listen daddy…” you said tears threatening to fall again.

“Yeah angel, you should be” He wanted to show you what you were missing out while you were busy simping over Zabini who played you around like a show off trophy.

-he wanted to you to be his. No he needed you to be his. He had to prove to you that he owned you, you were his property.

He slipped off your baby blue panties painfully slow.

“Now angel…gonna let daddy put his cock inside that tiny cunt of yours? Gonna fill you up with m’babies til you’re round, sounds good hm?”

The only word that left your mouth was a weak and pathetic ‘please’

You lifted your hips a little and moved your feet a little wider to show how bad you needed him right now. Draco cracked a proud smile. He unbuckled his belt and let it fall to the ground with a sharp thud, making you jolt up a little in surprise.

Soon enough he’s aligned at your entrance, torturing you with his slow actions.

“You’re mine now” you heard him whisper before he forcefully pushed inside of you, he was so big, the sting making you feel like you were on fire. You made grabby hands to show him that you needed comfort

“H-hold...” you said, voice cracking

“What’s that, angel? Wanna hold hands?” Draco mocked in a loving way. You only nodded while a tear slowly danced down your flushed cheeks. He leaned forward and intertwined his fingers with your small ones. Now the stretch was bearable.

He moved in further, ripping a sob out of you while doing so. Now he pushed even more so that he was buried deep inside of you, he was fully inside of you. He gave you some time to get used to the feeling.

Your legs shook, struggling to take all of him. But apparently nothing is impossible.

He groaned and squeezed your hand a firm squeeze to distract you a little.

“So small, so innocent all for me to ruin”

“You sure you can take this, angel?” He asked.

“Y-yes m’sure but you’re so b-big” you answered stubborn as always.

He started to move and at last he started to thrust deep inside of you. He watched as his cock disappeared in and out of your tight cunt. The pain from the stretch was compensated with the erotic and intimate feeling.

Your walls soft like velvet and the wetness he created making him loose his mind on you.

“Bloody hell, angel” he moaned while he threw his head back in pleasure and you answered with moan after moan...

He was so hard and heavy inside of you

“D-daddy-oh” you said in between moans and pants. Your whole body was sore and tired. His hand soon landed where you were sinfully connected and started to rub rough circles on it making electricity shoot through you. Moans increased in volume and your bodies had a thin glistening layer of sweat.

Draco grunted in pleasure, he felt himself slowly loosing control while fucking you in a animalistic pace.

“Your mine, only mine. I’m not sharing...No one can fuck you like I can, fucking Zabini don’t know what he lost!” Draco said while postponing himself in you in a brutal pace.

The double stimulation making the coil in your tummy tighten and bliss flowing in your veins.

Draco feels how close you were, squeezing him like a vice

“That’s it, c’mon cream all over my cock, cum for me angel” he hissed.

You screamed his name while you fell apart-euphoria. Coating his cock with your release, the mere sight of it and with a bias his thick white ropes of cum filled you up to the brim. The feeling making you shiver. He stayed inside of you to make sure to all of his white sin stays inside of you. When he had catched his breath again he pulled out carefully.

He observed how your small figure shook under him, he smiled lightly and kissed your sweaty forehead . He cleaned you up and you two laid together in his bed.

“Your mine now y/n, if you’ll have me. Zabini don’t know what he lost at all, he lost the world right before his eyes, y/n.”

At that a tear fell, not of hurt, not of pleasure but of love. You were so in love with Draco and have always been, but because of your strong bond you thought he just saw you as a good friend. But now he’s proven to you that you are his and no one else’s.

“Hold me closer Draco” you said and he swore his heart just melted.

——————————————————————

WARNINGS:!personally idk but: crying, dark thoughts, mentions of bad relationship with food and body, ED, sh.

Very personalized but I hope it’s okay anyway <3

~

You were woken up by the golden light caused by the morning sun, the birds chirped their everyday morning song per usual. You turned to your side just to find the love of your life, the one and only Draco Lucius Malfoy. The boy you couldn’t live without, and he could say the same about you. His light snores and relaxed facial expression made you smile a little, knowing that you were his and he was yours.

You decided to let him sleep a little longer and walked out of bed to go to the bathroom to get ready for the day, one of the benefits of dating a Malfoy, private dorm plus a private bathroom!

You brushed your teeth and tamed your hair after a too good night of sleep and some…other nightly activities with your boyfriend… but when it was time to put on your clothes you walked in front of a big mirror, you knew better than to be a brat and complain about your body and yada yada…but how could you not?

You stood only in your underwear, a pair of blush pink panties and a matching brah, you looked at your legs, then your thighs, the old scares on your inner thighs had started to pale a little, giving away a faint glimmer in the light. Then you looked at your forearms, the scares were fresher there probably around a couple months old. You stood there tracing the scares with a blank expression, not noticing Draco in the doorway you just stood in your own dark thoughts. He cleared his throat which startled you making you jump in place.

“Oh, good morning Dray!” You greeted Draco with a warm smile on your lips as usual. He looked at you with a knowing look before he walked in and hugged you from behind.

“Good mornin’ princess, slept good?” He asked and turned your bodies so that you were facing the large mirror.

“Yup! I’m sorry if I woke you up” you said, but the truth was that you had barely got a chance to fall asleep last night, and it was your dark thoughts to blame. But you knew you’d just make Draco more worried about you than he already was, so you sneaked in a white lie together with your warmest most convincing smile you had.

But Draco wasn’t dumb, he could sense your bad lies but decided to let it be and talk about it later.

“Don’t worry baby, just noticed you’re missing s’ all” he said letting go of you and started to get dressed.

Later that day

Lunchtime came fast today, you sat next to Draco at your table as usual. You had a very bad relationship with food and nobody except Draco knew about your eating disorder that you developed two years ago, in your fourth year in Hogwarts. He has helped you through the struggle at dinner time and you were beyond grateful for him.

“I know we have been taking baby steps, but today I’ll challenge you to eat a whole piece of chicken and vegetables” he said while handing you the plate with a little piece of chicken and greens. It wasn’t much for a ‘normal’ person, but for you it was very stressful and challenging…

“N-no Draco, it’s to much” you faced him with a worried expression. But you got calmer once he gave you a reassuring smile and a pat on your back.

“Don’t worry, princess. I’ll always be with you, let’s do it together hm?” He asked.

You nodded your head, you just wanted to make him proud of you for making progress in this subject. But just when you picked up your fork you heard Pansy Parkinson giggle with her friends a few seats away from you and Draco.

“Look! I think it’s the first time I ever seen y/l/n eat something” she said loud enough for you to hear

“About fucking time, look how her clothes are falling of her body” her friends said, joining her in a fit of cocky giggles.

You dropped your fork as fast as you picked it up and stood up from your seat.

“Y/n, don’t listen to pug face over there! Please sta-“ he grabbed your arm in a attempt to make you stay and finish your well needed dinner, but you yanked your arm away from his grip

“Please Draco, just leave me alone!” You said with a weak tone, your smile was long gone and your y/e/c eyes welled with tears. Draco let go of your arm and watched you hurry out in a horrible state.

He stood up aggressively and looked towards Pansy and her minions with a face red of anger. She just looked at him with a raised eyebrow and arms crossed.

“Thank fucking you for ruining her life! I’ve been trying to get her to eat for the longest time, and just when she was about to take a big step in her recovery you and your brain dead fucking minions tore her confidence and progress down!” He screamed at the raven haired girl, ignoring all the nasty looks he was given by the whole great hall.

“Woah, calm down Malfoy . I am sure she can stand up for herself, the truth lasts the longest. Like have she ever looked in the mirror? Like we wasn’t lying about it”

Pansy said with a gross amount of confidence.

“Honestly, what the hell is wrong with you?...” Draco said while he left the great hall to go looking for you.

Just when Draco opened his dorm room, knowing you never felt at peace in your own. He heard sniffles from the bathroom, he felt panic rise as he thought you’d hurt yourself. He took long and fast strides towards the dark wooden door and knocked.

“Y/n, love? Can you please unlock the door?” He only heard sobs which only scared him more.

“Alohomora” he walked in and immediately found you in a corner with your legs pressed to your chest and head down.

He walked over to you and pulled you in for a warm hug, you buried you face in his chest and let all your tears spill. He grabbed your wrists and examined them, he did the same with your legs. The gesture broke your heart.

Draco saw that his move hurt your feelings, but he had to make sure you were not hurt in any way.

“I’m sorry...” he heard you whisper.

“No stop that, you don’t have anything to be sorry about” he said while his eyes watered knowing how bad you felt now.

“ I-I was going to try to eat but I lost my appetite…” you sniffled. Draco rubbed your back and kissed your forehead with a sympathetic look.

“I don’t blame you princess, I’d loose my appetite too if I saw Parkinson’s pug face” Draco said and was relieved when you let out a little laugh between your tears.

“I just wanted to make you proud. I do want to eat Draco, but it is so hard for some reasons, I don’t want to be this thin believe it or not!” You said and he listened attentive to every word that came out of you.

“I just can’t find myself to eat, and every time you check my legs and wrists a piece of me always dies, because I know its my fault that you don’t trust me anymore. M’sorry” you sobbed out

He picked you up in his arms and put you down on his bed and tucked you in, he gave you a kiss on your cheek, he walked towards the door

“Wait where are you going?” You asked, you thought he was going back to his classes

“Don’t worry, love. I’ll hurry!” He said before he closed the door

Almost 20 minutes later he returned with a tray of different fruits, berries of all different varieties, steaming fresh pasta and a lot of snacks and soft drinks

“What are you up to now, Draco?” You asked as you watched him struggle to close the door with his hands full of things.

He walked up to you in the bed and placed the tray in your lap, he then changed into pajamas pants and a white t-shirt and sat in front of you in the bed with a grin on his face

“ okay princess, this is our plan. You and me are going to eat this pasta together, a also brought fruits and berries because I know you love berries. Then we are going to eat all of these snack while I read to you aloud. Is that okay?”

You just looked at him with so much love so that you wouldn’t be surprised you had hearts in your eyes when you looked at him. You nodded your head.

“Good! You don’t have to eat all of it, don’t feel any pressure because I’ll always be here with you.” He said.

You two ate the pasta together and he was very happy that you ate all of it! And you ate some berries while Draco ate a green apple, of course! Now you laid on his chest while he read aloud, like the cherry on the top he picked your favorite book! He traced small hearts on the exposed skin on your arm and paused his reading to look down at you

“What’s on that mind of yours, love?” He asked, you looked so deep in thought so that he just had to ask.

“You have been amazing to me Draco and I appreciate you so much. But someday you’ll probably grow tired and irritated of my problems, and I want you to know that I don’t blame you if if you do, I get tired of myself” you chuckled at the last part.

“But I don’t know how to live without you, it sounds stupid and dramatic, but it’s the truth.” You looked up at him, he had put his book down and sat himself up against the bed frame.

He grabbed your hands and kissed both of them.

“Y/n, I don’t even want to hear such bullshit, excuse my choice of word but that’s just rubbish! I’ll never in my entire life grow tired of helping you! I could never live with myself if I just left you all alone to deal with those dark thoughts on your own. I need you as much as you need me. I can’t live without you y/n, and I’ll never leave you.” He said while keeping eye contact.

Tears of happiness rolled down from your cheeks.

“Don’t cry princess” Draco said with tears rolling down too

“Now you’re crying!” You laughed as more tears looked like a waterfall in a rainforest

Draco leaned in and gave you a assuring kiss, a kiss that showed so much love it almost overwhelmed you. Yeh pulled away and picked you up and held you in his arms like a baby.

“I’m never leaving you, never princess”

——————————————————————

“wait! Come back! I thought you loved me“ Draco said dramatically to y/n who only needed to go to the bathroom.

“I’m literally just going to the bathroom, Draco, you’re so clingy today” y/n said the last part before she opened the bathroom door, but Draco ran inside the bathroom before she even could register what happened. She walked in too and closed the door after them anyway.

“I can’t even go to the bathroom alone anymore, huh? “ she asked when she sat down on the toilet. He sat down in front of her and just looked at her with heart eyes, even if she was peeing he didn’t care!

“No…y’done now? Let’s go and cuddle…!” He said to y/n when she walked out of the bathroom, to her desk to study for charms. She shook her head to her desperate boyfriend.

“Sorry Draco, but I really need to study right noow...!” She said as she pulled out a pencil and parchment to start her work, but Draco had other her plans. He whined and sighed for literally 10 minutes before he said something

“Y/n? If I can sit on your chair, you could sit in my lap?” He asked while he looked bored at himself in the mirror.

“yeah sure, but you have to behave yourself because I really need to get this done” she said. Draco sat down and pulled y/n in his lap, everything went well until Draco started nipping and sucking on her neck.

“Dray, as much as I love you...you have to stop” he looked at her and hugged her so tight he even got scared to break her perfectly tiny body.

“Sorry love, I just want to be close to you that’s all... had a rough day.” Y/n looked back at her boyfriend and felt quite bad for being so focused on her homework instead of him. But she got an idea!

“I can cockwarm you if you’d like to?” She asked him and his silvery stormy eyes lit up

“Yes, I’d like that thank you” he tried to sound calm but his voice betrayed him.

Y/n chuckled a little when she felt him get hard immediately underneath her. She stood up and took of her underwear so that she only wore a skirt and a black polo shirt. She undid Draco’s pants and lined his now erected cock up by her entrance. She sunk down in his cock and she let out a small groan at the size. Draco did the same, he loved how her velvety walls felt around him…

“Okay, now. Don’t disturb me to much okay love?” She said when they both settled and sat comfortably. Draco felt calm…but he wanted-no, needed more......

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THERE YA GO LOVES <3

Let me know if any of you actually read all of them! I rewrote a couple of my old fics into this one too!