#my antidepressant is testosterone

[theautismzone]

🏳️‍⚧️🌈𝖬𝖸 𝖠𝖭𝖳𝖨 𝖣𝖤𝖯𝖱𝖤𝖲𝖲𝖠𝖭𝖳 𝖨𝖲 𝖳𝖤𝖲𝖳𝖮𝖲𝖳𝖤𝖱𝖮𝖭𝖤🌈🏳️‍⚧️

x x x x x x x x x

[scorpiusmalfoylovesoscarwilde]

I made a meme do you leik it :)

[howdoweevensurviveinthislworld]

This is such a blessing of you to share my story. I'm so sorry and embarrassed to ask you to donate as well

There is nothing to be ashamed of here. You're doing what you have to, to survive and to me it's truly commendable that even in a situation as grim as this, you're still fighting!

That being said, I'm really sorry. I can't fulfill that request right now. I am unfortunately not in a financial situation where I can donate.

HOWEVER I am currently looking for a job, so once I have disposable income I'll make sure to donate !!

[vulpinesaint]

so much medicine in my body today. medical procedures georg if i am quite honest with you

[stimmingandstruggling]

(slightly tmi i guess, talkin about bottom growth)

ok so i’m like 2 months on t and things have been pretty slow going. i know for a lot of people bottom growth is one of the first changes they notice, but i havent noticed anything so far. UNTIL. last night i woke up in the middle of the night like bitch WHYY am i so uncomfy. then i was like wait. is this the discomfort/itching i was warned ab with bottom growth. i was tired as fuck so i changed into some looser underwear and went back to sleep but today i was just showering and looked down and YEAHHH! THERE HE IS!!!!! bro i feel like there was NOTHING a day ago but now there is SOMETHING and it’s so cool. i wasn’t expecting this to feel so gender euphoric but i love it

[wylansworkshop]

y'all, when I realized I was nonbinary I did not expect getting gender dysphoria from buying vitamins

[gilfrespecter]

Me when being on an antidepressant makes me less depressed

[carfuckerlynch]

oh god i super gotta figure out how i can get my prescriptions filled

[kerosene-saint]

they picked this of all images to show for me in my 8th grade year book.

[scramratz]

Is it weird to say testosterone is an antidepressant for me? Like yea I appreciate the new secondary sex characteristics but also my brain just…functions better with T

[rubus-yunnion]

Quick Davey Rennick doodles + health update

Hey everyone, my hand is feeling a lot better now and is healing fast, but I unfortunately had to leave the discord because of my own very personal reasons. Nothing against anyone at all, it's just health issues that I've been dealing with for 8 years now. I've gotten a lot of support from friends and I appreciate them for being so understanding and I'm hoping to see a doctor next week about getting some antidepressants, I'll also be going through a lot of testosterone therapy since now I feel like its the time to continue with my transitioning.

In the meantime I've been doodling Rennick since he's been a very big comfort of mine for the past couple of days along with Gibbo, Muir and Innes. These beautiful screenshots are from @kuvastei

Screenshots:

Thank you to everyone who's stuck around for so long during these troubling times, I've finished off your doodle requests and now all I really want to do is sleep (since its been 4 weeks since I've last slept)

Now I'll go rest, take care everyone ^^

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

hi! this is kind of a sex-adjacent question but i thought you/your followers might have knowledge: i’m on testosterone for trans reasons but currently due to convoluted life circumstances am having trouble getting my prescription refilled/can’t see my doctor about it; do you have any idea what effects/timeline of changes i’m likely to experience? i’ve tried googling but not had much luck

hi anon,

luckily I hang out with a lot of people on T and almost all of them have gone off it for a time due to convoluted life circumstances of their own.

the biggest change is there your period is likely to come back, so sorry in advance about that. many people report that their period coming back when they go off T is one of the most brutal cycles they ever have, which is for sure something to look out for. the change in the hormonal composition in your body can also cause painful mood swings, the same as trying out new antidepressants might do.

beyond that, you'll stop seeing growth caused by testosterone - you won't be seeing much more new body hair or bottom growth, you won't be gaining more muscle, your voice won't be getting any deeper, etc. but the changes you've seen so far won't go away over night. over a long time you might find some parts of your body looking and feeling a little more like they did before testosterone, but exactly how long that will take varies HUGELY from person to person.

anyone who has firsthand experience going off T, pls feel free to chime in with your own experiences!

[certifiedsexed]

transmasc bottoms in the crowd Help. how do y’all deal with vaginal atrophy from t (tis a common side effect). Because of my antidepressants I need a lot of stimulation to get off, and I keep getting too in to it and hurting myself even with lube 😭

Have you tried topical estrogen, Anon? That's a very common treatment for vaginal atrophy, especially when its caused by testosterone. So are general vaginal creams!

It might be a good idea to talk to your doctor about a prescription for topical estrogen or some other med, as well as checking out over-the-counter vaginal creams/moisturizers.

Hope this helps! Let me know if you have any other questions, Anon. <3

[shamebats]

It's a weird idea that I've been rotating in my head in a while but I do feel like I'm in a way a case study against the idea that if society wasn't as gendered, there wouldn't be any trans people.

Despite the society I grew up in having been misogynistic & patriarchal, my own family & the school system were actually surprisingly not that gendered. My parents were fairly autistic themselves, my mom was pretty butch in a rural slavic woman way (never really wore skirts or dresses, makeup or cared that much about her appearance, she had work to do) and I was a defiant child, so they'd mostly just let me do my own thing. I forbade my mom from buying clothes for me without my input fairly young, so I could pick my own clothes and dress however I liked. I was about as likely to dress in a more feminine way as any boy because I knew that everyone including my teachers would've made weird comments about it if I came to school in a skirt. I had a little brother and we were treated fairly equally, we were even abused & neglected in the same ways (yay, equality!).

My best friend growing up was a neighbors' boy and we spent most of our time together getting dirty, trying not to get lost in the forest and climbing tall trees. Nobody ever told me I wasn't supposed to do "boyish" things. But at the same time, my neighbor's grandma also taught us both how to embroider and sew on buttons and we were way more into it than his sisters. At school, I was only friends with girls.

For the first like 3 years of school, we all (girls & boys) had gym class together and even got changed together in the classroom, I think it was because we didn't have any dressing rooms at that school, and nobody thought it was weird.

Adults drilled into me that I needed to study so I could go to university because I was smart and that was what was the plan for me. The fact that I was a girl didn't have any influence on that. Sure, I was told I'd want kids eventually, but boys were told the same thing and nobody ever made me feel like motherhood was the main thing I needed to aim for in life.

I didn't really think about my gender much until puberty hit. To this day, most of my dysphoria comes from my body — my breasts, my uterus, menstruation, the fact that I could get pregnant, the shape of my body. Thankfully, not wanting children in your teens & 20s was also very normal & expected in my culture and birth control was free while I was a student.

At work, my bosses were always about 50/50 men and women. Right now I have a male superior but his boss is a woman and we're the only men in our team. We're paid fairly because we're in a union, but even pre-transition I was always paid well. I never felt like I would've been better off at work if I'd been a man.

My partner always liked that I was a tomboy and never put pressure on me to be more feminine. We had some issues with equal division of chores at the beginning but we've been pretty 50/50 for a while now and we've always had separate bank accounts and our own savings.

We've also known for a long time that we don't want children, so I was never looking at a future where I'd be sacrificing myself for others in the way most cis straight women do. In fact, my partner quit his job & moved countries for my sake.

Despite all of this, I still prefer being a man. Not much has changed for me socio-economically. If I'd stayed in my home country, I would've basically just gained transphobia as an issue. But I moved to a more accepting place so even that isn't as bad. My partner turned out to be supportive and is very much happy with me being his boyfriend now, so not even that aspect of my life changed since transitioning. I was very lucky.

I love being a man. Being on testosterone makes me feel like my body is finally mine and I've been riding the high of a much improved mental state since day 1 of starting T. I can only describe it like "what antidepressants wish they could do".

So if society wasn't gendered at all. If gender didn't exist and if misogyny wasn't real. If biology was the only thing that'd differ between people? Yeah, I'd still want T, top surgery & a hysterectomy. I'd still be a transsexual, and I'm pretty sure I'd still want to be a man.

[acidtouch11]

For the past two days I have ruined all my orgasms.

I was at a starbucks yesterday doing some work on my computer and I got so horny. My tdick was pulsing in my pants. I was so embarrassed but also turned on. I masturbate (and cum) a lot so I don’t often get horny outside of my bedroom. But ruining my orgasms really flipped a switch in me. I also bought several new toys that I knew were waiting for me at home which really added to things. The thought that I was aroused in public with nobody around me knowing was really hot. Also the fact that I couldnt do anything about it. I just had to sit there and accept it.

It’s honestly a miracle that I’ve had the self control to ruin my past three orgasms. My self control is terrible. I will spend hours just jerking off. And I love cumming. It feels so good. But I also love the feeling of being horny. I love being desperate. I’m not strong enough to just edge and stop, I have to ruin it or else I’ll just keep edging till I cum. Ruining forces me to stop because I can’t cum multiple times (thanks antidepressants).

Yesterday I woke up in the morning and I was so hot and bothered. My tdick felt so good when I touched it which isnt always the case. I usually have to work myself up. (I’ll probably make another post about my “process”). I ruined twice yesterday. It was so awful. After I pulled my vibrator away my hands spasmed at my sides, clawing at anything and everything to keep away from my clit. It’s such an intense feeling, I love it and I hate it. I find denial so fucking hot but I don’t have the self control to really commit to it. I just get so desperate and all I can think about is how good it would feel to cum.

That reminds me of another post I read on here. It talked about how some people say edging feels better than cumming. But we all know that’s not true. The post talked about how cumming feels better. But it’s not about what feels better, it’s about what is better for you. It’s better to be denied than to feel good. Denial is better for you than cumming. Building that pressure only for it to have nowhere to go. You can’t beat that.

Now if I just had someone with a stronger will than me to hold me to that. I want someone around me 24/7 who can force me to be no touch. It is actually impossible for me right now to go more than a day or two without masturbating. Testosterone has made me a fucking monster. All I want is to feel good all the time. I want someone to force me to find out how desperate I can get.

[blubushie]

Yikes, reading some of these messages hit a little too close to home.

I'm a trans man, and my relationship with masculinity has been more rocky as recently. I started T and realized I have much more dysphoria than I realized because I was ignoring it. And I've experienced my fair share of transphobia.

I've had classmates say (jokingly, I know) that I'll start becoming entitled, and a misogynist because I started T. In a university level queer studies class, they all had certain distaste for men. The expectation was that they would shut up and not talk over the woman's experiences (to be fair, I was one of 2 men in that class). Even one of my closest friends has issues with hating men that I've meant to bring up (I'm the exception because I'm trans and don't really look like a man most of the time). But I've always brushed it off, saying that "trans women have it worse" or "this is what I get for becoming the 'enemy'".

It took me a long time to even admit I was trans because I know that men were "the enemy" and I was betraying people by becoming one.

That anon who said that he didn't want to become a Twink, oof I relate to that. It wasn't until I got into TF2 that I realized what kind of form I wanted (Engineer and Soldier being major players in this realization).

You are the only one I've ever really seen talking about masculinity. Like ever, and I've been in queer spaces for a very long time. It's comforting to know that my struggles are real. And aren't being brushed off as "well xxxx have it worse." (I know. I know other trans people have their struggles and should not be treated as irrelevant. I know that. But I never see anyone talking about masculinity. It's treated as a disease almost).

I'm rambling, but I guess I just wanted to say thanks. I rarely talk to anyone on the Internet, content to just observe, but you've really made me feel seen. So thank you

I don't wanna be the one to break it to you, but if someone says they hate men and say you're an exception because you're trans or don't look enough like a cis man, it's because they're transphobic and don't see you as a "real" man. And that will change when you start passing and getting clocked as male, and it'll especially change when you express any joy in what testosterone is doing to your body or any joy in being perceived as male. You're most likely an exception because they don't see you as a man yet even though you are one.

Additionally I don't know how long you've been out, but since you're just starting on T, this means people have probably been clocking you and IDing you as female most of your life. Which means you have every right to discuss women's issues and misogyny because you have been subjected to misogyny. NO ONE gets to just erase your lived experiences growing up in a female body and being subjected to misogyny just because you are now openly identifying as male.

And we don't choose our gender. We're born this way, remember? You're betraying no one by "becoming" a man because you were born a man. At most you're making a choice to change your body to ease the symptoms of an illness—gender dysphoria—and I don't see anyone copping shit with depressed people for taking antidepressants. You're not on some random drug, you are specifically on a medication to treat an illness that you have. If people don't like that because of what variant of that illness you have, they can get fucked. They are not worth your time.

You are 100% valid in your experiences and feelings. I'm glad that I can offer a safe space for you to speak about those things.

Also, if I can suggest, it might do you some good to join a club of some kind with a lot of men where you can see masculinity be celebrated in a positive light instead of demonised. I'm not sure if you're into hunting or fishing, but those are my best suggestions. An archery club, a hunting club, a fishing club, etc. Hang out at your local bait shop looking like a sad puppy and some old fart'll find you and invite you fishing.

Chookas, mate. Keep your chin up. You're doing fine.