#must i do everything myself...
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
the urge to read a dust x reader fic is strong but like...
I get frustrated by the interpretations. it's like... they did dust so dirty man.
bro is NOT a friking... idunno. feral beast or an egotistical maniac that only uses others as tools like your avrage charismatic bad guy. he's a fucking depressed mess of a man scrambling for any sense of control. an asshole at best and a killer at worst but he won't care enough to ... uh... you know...uhm... erm...
look the guy does mercy killing. he doesn't drag things out. he would NOT FUCKING DO THAT.
no I'm not calling him a saint or saying he's above it. he would do it IN THE RIGHT CONTEXT and not just out on a whim.
like he's still horrible but it's a different flavor of evil. he's like a minty vanilla flavoured kinda bad guy that won't cross some lines such as [REDACTED].
like I'd expect that from fanon [REDACTED] sans but like COME ON.
he's not a fucking [REDACTED]
heck he wouldn't even bother doing that to crimson who he's WANTS TO KILL with all his being.
it's weird but like... crimson and dust... they're weirdly in sync? like they've been fighting toghter for so long they already have memorized each other's micro expressions body language fidgets lil perks... they're FAMILIAR with how the other ticks. and like...
after so long I don't THINK dust actually wants to BREAK crimson. if they leave he's going to just be alone with his voices...
crimson IS head over heels for the guy but they respect his boundaries. THEY'RE not just gonna go there and like idunno. KISS him out of nowhere. not without a build up or him being open to the idea.
it's HARD to even call it romance. they've been stuck toghter for so long that some personal boundaries sorta... washed away? like they're both used to invading each other's personal space as pranks. but not to the extent that it'd actually TRIGGER either of them.
like he doesn't really mind it. he's used to them flirting.
as for crimson...
they're up for anything he give a green light for and if not? they're ok with it. they don't really wanna put a name to this codependency. friends enemies soul mates lovers they're just words and labels.
they prefer companion or... murder buddy.
so like I FEEL like dust yk... wouldn't really uhm... you know JUMP on the opportunity to link his soul to them to kill them both at once? even for the sake of resets.
specially cuz souls don't just... work like that. you can't FORCE a soul link in most fanfic interpretations...
unless that's not the case then that's just my thornbound souls au which it's LITERALLY a forced bond formed from spite...
that aside sometimes they kiss mid fight either to gain the upper hand and stab the other person... or not and just yk. make out n shit. it's not even really a commitment or a sign of trust or anything.
it's like... they know each other so we'll that the mental barriers. the shame. the stuff you have when you're with someone who doesn't know you and everything you ARE?
they don't really do anything without reading the other's vibe. like. it's not a HEALTHY relationship by any means but they WON'T cross some lines.
and if they do cross it it's likely because crimson or dust allowed it so because they felt playful or just feeling adventurous. they're BOTH STRONG. they can justake seperate choices.
they're both unstable individuals and crimson doesn't want to break his fragile mind even further.
also the fact that crimson can't actually feel any pain.
that also creeps dust out lmao.
#potentially suggestive#suggestive#most dust fanfics suck#must i do everything myself...#crimsondust
12 notes
·
View notes
Text
deeply disappointed in the lack of actual proper borderlands fanon. where's the 10k word made up lore where's the custom manufacturers where's the element charts and complex DeviantArt esque diagrams
21 notes
·
View notes
Text
was shocked to see that I couldn't find a sexyman design for multilevel mark. Back In My Day the gravity falls fanbase made sexymen out of thin air by overanalyzing a joke in a reddit ama. My God How We Have Fallen
#sigh. must i do everything myself#this is all very jokey and nonserious btw. i also may not have looked hard enough frankly#anyways i like his design. its Neat#currently i am too exhausted to do an id so hopefully i can do one tomorrow#doc talks#my art#undescribed#gravity falls#bill cipher#the book of bill#thisisnotawebsitedotcom
569 notes
·
View notes
Text
Okay I know I'm the most biased person about dadmare, but you can't honestly tell me that if Cross started to mention the way xgaster treated him and his brother as children - the way an adult bullied and belittled and abused them - that it wouldn't make Nightmare see red
#UTDR#UTMV#Dadmare#Like the call is coming from inside the house again!!#Nightmare trying to be detached and collected to prove he doesn't have a familial attachment to his henchmen#And then he hears that Cross was treated badly by adults as a child and he's instantly like ''I'll kill him myself''#I just#Okay#Wick very nicely talked to me about Cross and dadmare yesterday and I'm still whipping it around like a dog with a new toy#LIKE I just think it could be a little healing for both of them#For Cross to get someone in an authoritative role who praises and appreciates him and refuses to treat him like that#And for Nightmare it must be at least a little rewarding to see someone who went through hell as a child and do everything you can to make#-them comfortable and tell them it wasn't their fault#Like I'm sure he still has stuff from his incident to process and maybe sharing it with Cross could do that#Obviously it's not 1 to 1 on what they went through but it might be similar enough to be cathartic#I don't know I just want to see them get along#I want Cross to have a father figure that would tear the multiverse in half to save him#I want Nightmare to learn to love and show it#I want 16 days off work in a row so I can lie in bed and go insane about this
128 notes
·
View notes
Text
Genuinely i wonder how common it is to hallucinate / perceive things oddly / have a notably altered perception of things
#alda rambling#I feel like no one ever talks about it near me so I don't know#If its just that no one else feels it or I'm the only one freaking out about it#Maybe everyone or many ppl feel the way I feel and I'm the only person who can't handle it#Or very few people feel how I feel and I'm repressing it to fit in#Isn't there some kind of group for this. Do I have to join reddit. I don't want to join reddit#I've definitely talked about it before but ahaha. No answers you see. So I continue#(If you have experience with this I'd appreciate a line xo )#I mean. I'm a textbook case of Keeping It To Myself#But also I fear I have main character syndrome#Which makes me think I'm faking everything and I'm just a normal gal who needs attention#But isn't THAT a bit of a mental hypochondriac thing too?#So am I faking for attention or is it real because of a need for attention#Either way I lose lmao so that means it must be real#No but seriously. If you have experience with this I'd love a reach-out it does have me slightly freaked out.
110 notes
·
View notes
Text
Any thoughts to Dusknoir getting "advice" from Darkrai in the future (while hunting Grovyle & Hero)?
#Darkrai not wanting to interfere with Dusknoir chasing the human and Grovyle in the future but when Dusknoir loses them this bastard has#information to where they went. That's the only reason why Dusknoir even accepts having Darkrai around. He gives him valuable#ressources to continue his hunt for Celebi Grovyle & the human (BECAUSE THIS FUCKER WOULD RATHER MANIPULATE OTHERS#THAN DO THE WORK HIMSELF. IF CHUNSOFT WON'T DO IT I'LL GIVE HIM THE DEPTH OKAY.)#I imagine that Darkrai would just appear randomly. Then mock Dusknoir a little for losing them and telling him where they went.#Dusknoir would be so sus of this guy. Like wdym he just got jumped by a Pokemon he's never seen before AND that same Pokemon#just told him everything he needed to continue the hunt for the Hero gang. LIKE HUH???? Darkrai would never ever tell him his name though.#This is so Yaoi coded I know- It just happened guys. I'm still blaming @softstarryblanket for that. WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO ME.#Also hi if you're reading this :D!#'You must safe your existence dusknoir.'#'**You'll succumb to my darkness eventually marionette.**'#'You must stop those who want to destroy your life dusknoir.'#'**Your life is worthless in comparison to my immortality marionette.**'#Hi I love writing and I'm losing myself. I'm not screaming for help but my head keeps exploding a little too much every 5 seconds.#Saw the marionette nickname from fujii and I will put every thumb up that is in my close radius.#dusknoir#darkrai#pmd#pokemon mystery dungeon explorers of sky#pmd eos#my stuff#my art#pokemon mystery dungeon#pokemon#pmd2#pmd explorers#Congrats to you if you made it through the tags. If you're new here yeah they do tend to get long. Anyways have a lovely day <3
62 notes
·
View notes
Text
Something so ineffable about exhaustion that comes not from a lack of sleep but from a lack of rest
#neeed a day where I’m doing nothing but I don’t think that’s forthcoming#I was out all day + forced myself to hit the gym before coming home and I am TIRED#it took a hot shower to feel my bones. and now I have to study. and then I have somewhere to be tomorrow#and then I go back to the neuro clinic on Monday. which is FUN I love it#but I don’t think I can be fully present in anything if I’m so divided between everything#multitasking is an absolute must but I think downsizing just a little bit will probably mean I get to be a healthier vessel#I just need time to chill in bed and watch silly movies and read books and chart stars and count rocks idk
199 notes
·
View notes
Text
At what point does Jinx’s crimes against Piltover in Arcane go from appalling, to an understandable if even necessary evil? This is not to say she did nothing wrong. It would be a lie to claim that. The whole point of Arcane is that even with the best intentions sometimes you just end up making everything worse.
But those who see all of her actions as bad because they’re terrorism, because ‘violence is wrong’… and therefore shooting a missile at the council is automatically an unforgivable crime, who can’t understand why they took her character the way they did in season 2, how Ekko could make up with her, how Zaun started looking up to her as a hero, I just want to ask a question.
At what point is it ethical to use violence as a tool against injustice and subjugation? If it ever is. Even if every peaceful option has been walked down before and the best that ever gets you is the tolerance of being allowed to exist as long as you don’t exist too loudly. That’s not a hard answer, there’s no definite line in the sand here. It’s one you have to draw yourself.
Personally? I think the reason some people look at Jinx and see an irredeemable monster, is because they live in a society that feels more like Piltover to them than Zaun. Have already drawn a line of what Zaun is in their society so that they live above it, are better than it.
How fucked does a country have to get before we can fight back and people will look back on us as revolutionaries instead of terrorists? Two sides of the same coin after all, the only real difference is perception.
#arcane#jinx#jinx arcane#rambles#my post#I’m definitely not talking about anything to do with the real world right now#I don’t know if this makes sense#I just keep seeing fan media where Jinx’s actions against Piltover aren’t seen as nuanced and are instead seen as completely wrong#and it bugs me… because you can say oh but she blew up the council while they were talking about peace!#… Why were they voting on that at all? Jinx.#if Jinx hadn’t existed#if Silco hadn’t done things that were ethically dubious#things that I myself wouldn’t consider good#I doubt anything in Zaun would have ever even had the chance to improve#things don’t change unless the problem becomes too loud to be ignored#so who better to be a loud problem for Piltover than Jinx?#it’s more complicated than this. I know.#but I think if you consider Jinx’s actions to be monstrously evil#her to be a terrorist who must be redeemed#apologize for everything she did equally with no nuance for the world she lives in#why? why do you think that?#you’re not wrong or right. it’s more complicated than that#just… examine why you think the way you do about it.
26 notes
·
View notes
Text
Not enough people are horny for melody. WHERE are the explicit fics. The down bad fanart. It's like you all hate women!!!!!!
34 notes
·
View notes
Text
just need to get the failure out of my system
#every time i set myself up to be disappointed#based on those research papers abt melatonin i thought maybe this will finally be the thing that gets me to be tired at night#didn't work. i have never and will never be normal. i would even be happy with dspd because you can work graveyard shifts.#but having a schedule that unrelentingly advances is simply not compatible with society#and i keep grasping at straws but the truth is there's no fixing it#if i could sleep hygiene and willpower my way into a healthy sleep schedule i would have done it by now#i'm just tired. the entire world thinks i'm lazy. i just need to power through the sleepless nights.#and i did. for my entire childhood and teenage years.#but it turns out chronic sleep deprivation will wreck your shit permanently#so what else can i do. i promise i've tried everything. i swear i'm not just lazy. i've been like this as long as i can remember.#i think i must still have some worth even if i can't work an 8-5 job#just have to figure out what it is and start accepting
20 notes
·
View notes
Text
pretty & cute witch men
#witch hat tag#orufrey#i'm not drawing as much or as well as i'd like to be doing. i'm trying to get through a comic i've been really wanting to do#but i'm just finding it so hard. disheartening. btw the 2nd one relates to some official art of qif wearing a dress like the girls#and the 4th one relates to how i've been drawing EXTREMELY SMALL for years. idk how to explain it but i always clicked 'fit to screen'#and so all my art EVER has looked bad when you zoom in bc it's already like size 1 zoomed in to the MAX pfhgguguhfpfhGHAHHHHH#i was so confused allll this time why brushes always look different for me than what they're supposed to#'wow this brush is so jaggedy..really rather jaggedy...calling it the Jagged Cai Special..bringing it out for those jaggedy moments..#really quite jaggedy i must say...' and it's literally not jaggedy#but now i have to get used to how all those brushes that i'd gotten used to indeed look how they're supposed to finally. Alarming#I have simply been working out absolutely everything by myself for years and that's why my technical progress is slow#ppl say my progress is fast and i certainly have improved much since i began doing all this but#like..it took me a year and half to start using a program where i could Colour In The Lines aka the..whatever it's called. whatever..#just on my lonely confused solemn journey to express gay love better than yesterday.. -_- *picks up my pack n continues through the snow*#btw thank you sm for people's kind words enjoying my narumitsu art & fic over the christmas & new year period <3
187 notes
·
View notes
Text
I’m sorry. But Toji loves eating pussy from the back. It’s his favorite position. He loves seeing on your knees, ass up for him. Getting to spread you up bury his face in your cunt. Hearing your muffled cries as your face is squished into the bed. The way you press back and try wiggle against him for more. And he loves how easy it is to spank you/slip a finger in your ass while he’s doing it
#we as a society have forgotten about this position#it’s always on laying down or sitting on faces#where are the eating pussy from the back fics#must I do everything myself#kidding#toji smut#toji headcanons
451 notes
·
View notes
Text
I have a 3 day weekend coming up next week you know what that means:
#im chaining myself to the tablet and not leaving until its done#i want to get it done before tf con bc i have things i want to draw FOR tf con#it will not be as pretty as the first one and i am coming to peace with that but there will be Horrors#theres going to be a bonus 2.1 bc talking to friend about the imagery and its so delicious#everyone is going to be either 1 weeping or 2 shocked like that lisa meme#can you forgive a child for doing something very childish but also horrifying and frightening and understandable from an adults perspective#welcome to nightvale voice: Someone must be to blame#ive been hinting at it where is that Garak and Julian meme it goes like this:#Julian: but out of all the stories you told me what was the truth and what were the lies?#Garak: my dear doctor theyre all true :)#me but how everything ive said about piston funny haha memes or super serious are all foreshadowing#i got 1 comic that is the final table setting piece to set the tone the mood the vibe the atmosphere and the final panel? oh youll scream#and a tf one thing and a meme on the menu for this week and then im locking and clocking in#thank you for your patience!#transformers#maccadam#tf piston#tf fankid
20 notes
·
View notes
Text
is no one gonna gif my lady jane
#must i do everything myself#i dont want to bc i know i'll regret it after the -5 notes#my lady jane
55 notes
·
View notes
Text
Runaway by Aurora is such a Jinx-coded song and yet there's not one single good edit.
#we used to be a proper country!#highfive if you got the bottoms refrence#must I do everything myself. now I'll have to make this one too now#welp#here goes nothing#arcane#jinx#jinx arcane
19 notes
·
View notes
Text
this scar is a fleck on my porcelain skin
#fanart#dragon age#solas#solas dragon age#solavellan#i need more dav solavellan content from a lavellan who will never ever forgive him!!!!!!! i must do everything myself#emathenan bellanathe#love a forgiving solavellan but it is wild 2 me how i see so few lavellans who are like no actually i do not forgive my bf for using and#lying 2 me for the duration of our relationship. particularly for using me as part of his plan 2 destroy the world that i love
34 notes
·
View notes