#must be something else going on idk
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steve “cant get out of bed till middle of the day, barely leaves his house or is never home, isolating himself from everyone, never takes time for himself anymore, depressed and is slowly losing more and more of himself every single day” harrington post 1986’
robin “i know you loved her, and it must’ve killed that she wouldn’t take you back, but nancy is happy steve and she still loves you. she’s not the only one out there for you, and you’ve gotta get over it. we miss you” buckley post 1986’, trying to help her best friend
steve “…this isn’t about nancy” harrington.
robin “wha-?… oh. oh steve.” buckley.
he still wears the vest.
#stranger things#eddie munson#steddie#steve harrington#nancy wheeler#stranger things 4#robin buckley#yeah idk#i just thoight abt this#bc i miss my pooks#steve being so distraught after the events of s4#and it’s understandable and everyone else is kinda the same level of shook up for a while#but for steve it just… continues#and nobody really knows what’s going on#robin tries to get him out of his shell without prying for so long#but eventually she just straight up tells him how it is in an attempt to get him to TALK to her#SAY SOMETHING#bc she thinks it must be he is heartbroken abt nancy#she didn’t want him back#and that’s so rough but#robin wants him to know that she isn’t the only person in his life that loves him#even if it’s not in the way he is wanting#but steve just#he just says; this isn’t about nancy#and robin is confused#then she puts it all together#then she understands.#eddie.
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whoever needs to hear this: if you got a disability, if you don’t know if you have something, if you ever think “it’s not that bad” if you have a thing about guilt, if you’re ill, Anything: listen. it is okay to throw things away.
you can throw it away. if it sucks and it stresses you the fuck out, if you just “need the right time to fix it” for the past 3 months. or years. if you loved it once upon a time but it makes you feel kinda weird and guilty now. if it’s a jacket youve reaaaally been meaning to mend and then donate. a jar of sauce that “all you have to do” is clean out to recycle but it’s been a week and now there’s a small colony growing in it. slowly shredding to bits fabric scraps you plan to use to fix something. busted picture frame. cracked mug. old shoes. extra box. an entire pack of granola bars that you hate so much but don’t want to waste.
life is already so goddamn difficult for us. i know you still care about recycling and the environment and sustainability. but it’s okay, i promise. sometimes you have to take care of your space. sometimes you have to cut your losses so you can actually have energy to recycle the next thing. get rid of the old shirt before it turns into a tornado pile of guilt under the bed. you’re not a bad person. you can throw this one away.
#idk if marie kondo talked about trash in this way but i do remember something about her philosophy helping me with the guilt aspect of this#like the ability to thank something for the service it provided you but recognize that you’ve grown beyond it. yes even for dumb tshirts#feeling very chatty today lol.#text#disability#uhhh idk what else to tag#cleaning#environmentalism is one of my great passions#but everyone has to recognize they cannot be activists 100% of the time and do the right thing 100% of the time#using my iphone to post this is one of those things. buying something from amazon bc i can’t make myself go to the store is one.#sometimes one must preserve themself simply in the name of preservation. take care of your space bc that’s where you do You.#and sometimes objects accumulate in said space and just get this awful sickly aura. metaphorically#where you can’t deal with it so you shove it somewhere else. but it’s okay to get rid of shit that sucks
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thinking about not only the specific people lucanis pulls in to represent the 'locks' in his psyche, but the storytelling that happens in the structure/order of them. the underlying ideas are presented something like:
the lucanis who went into the ossuary never came back out again; he died down there (the boy caterina raised is gone forever) -> you're putting yourself in danger doing this (by being close to me), you should leave because I can't bear it if you get hurt because of me -> it doesn't matter even if we do try this, it won't work anyway (again because of me) ('you know what he's like, you can open the door but he won't walk through it' :'( oofie doofie) -> what if the real secret is that there was never anything but the monster in here from the beginning. you should leave, there was never anything here worth saving in the first place. (implicitly: what if I deserved what happened, all along.)
it runs pretty cleanly from outward-oriented attachment anxiety ('caterina won't even want me back like this, she won't recognize me (the same way I no longer recognize myself)) and gradually deeper inwards until we reach self-image and self worth. or you know, the harrowing basic lack of it lol.
"careful -- they'll know we're not right," spite says in one of their first scenes... but clearly, some very deep part of lucanis has feared or suspected for much longer than that that there's something inherently not right at the core of him, way before any demon entered the picture. and the voice he gives those lines to is the person who should know him better than anyone in the world, who he has loved more than anyone in the world -- and who deliberately chose to hurt him so horrifically anyway. 'It's better if I'm just a monster and deserved what happened than it is to allow for the idea that the brother I love doesn't really exist and maybe never did'. it's better if he's fundamentally flawed in some way that needed fixing to help him survive, and that's why caterina chose to hurt him again and again -- out of love. (this one I think he might have a very sad wakeup call on one day if he ever ends up with the responsibility and care of a child of his own in some way and realizes just how alien the idea of ever intentionally hurting them for any reason is to him. oh buddy. also interesting that he keeps caterina as the outermost lock -- there IS a distance he keeps there that he hasn't with illario. he doesn't resent her 'anymore' he says, but he also keeps her carefully further away from his deepest self.)
as far as I could tell the only note in the mind prison that's fully hidden and needs to be uncovered is the sad painful helpless stupid little truth that even after all this, even knowing what happened... he still loves his brother. is there anything illario could ever do that would make lucanis completely stop loving him, do you think? sometimes the trouble with unconditional love is that it is, well. unconditional, even when some terms and conditions probably would have been in order haha.
that's the pattern you see there again and again; he would rather destroy and abandon and imprison himself at every turn than let go of love, even when it's just scraps, even when there's only ever enough of it to hurt him. it's only when rook shows up and as it were takes his hand and walks along with him that he can entertain the idea of changing the story of what walking out the door might mean in the end.
#tl;dr the demon is a metaphor about dissociation and trauma and it's doing its job thematically fucking pitch perfectly that way the end#dragon age#dragon age: the veilguard#dragon age: the veilguard spoilers#dragon age spoilers#lucanis dellamorte#dragon age meta#this mission is like ds9 the wire in terms of episodes you really can examine from a thousand different angles#and find something new and soulcrushingly sad every time. exactly my kind of episode in other words#whenever people say there's nothing to him but coffee and spite jokes some small part of me goes 'oh I'm so incredibly sorry!#it must be really hard and so impractical to go through life without being able to read :'( get better soon'#is that very nice of me. perhaps not. is the writing here *perfect*? of course not. but some people are also dedicated to being#wilfully blind (presumably b/c they would have preferred to see something else?? idk man)#lucanis' reaction to taash going 'I'm sorry I'm such a bad crow :'('... he could NEVER do what caterina did with him no matter what#you just can't use him like that. he needs the clean family/enemy/contract distinction or you just break him!!!#caterina literally what are you thinking. every day I ask myself this. (probably 'the only other option that keeps the seat in the family#is illario. so that's right out of course' lmao)#god forbid it happen anytime soon if it should happen b/c there's Stuff that needs working through first lol but he'd be such a soft dad
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everyone gets a turn in the ridiculous skintight edmondsuit. or at least, .everyone SHOULD
#a pre-sleep rarity... THERE ARE HUMANS IN MY BRAIN THIS TIME#idk i just missed them. there's something soothing about the fire water earth trio#been spending more time with the final trio (blade dante rei) lately and they bring lovable chaos#whereas the starter trio are tea parties and gentle smiles#edmond's outfit is iconic honestly it made me laugh for several minutes when i first saw it and i've never forgotten the feeling#imagine edmond going out to fetch some oats or smth#and when he comes out of the market he sees the entire clan cosplaying as him#it's not like the other soldiers have this uniform right? so it's an edmond exclusive?#maybe only ed gets the sash and badge#but everyone else gets those thigh high boots and capelet that ends just above their butts#in the universe where they must wrangle with dangling dicks ruining the flow of their outfit#ed and oli know how to tuck. they do it marvelously#yaku can either be slit-blessed (no need to alter his bits for the silhoeutte)#or CURSED with massive external dick. which is funnier bc then it's IMPOSSIBLE to walk around in an outfit like that#it's like the grey sweatpants meme. ur just tryna exist but all these jezebels keep staring at your dick outline#(jezebels is eiden)#nu carnival edmond#nu carnival olivine#nu carnival yakumo
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a little morning hello from mr luffy himself ! happy friday friendz ! a few more hours and we will be at the weekend 🙂↕️ what a week it’s been ! i think we all deserve a little treat for getting though it hehe be gentle to yourself today and have a great one <3
#idk if i’ve posted him since i got him .. obi was too busy being a meme queen#and lowkey gets jealous whenever i try to take a pic of lulu ( there’s like 6 other pics in this shoot that obi just sat in front of him )#but here’s sweet lulu lemon drop !#i was calling him something else since i got him but lulu just fits too well#this little dude is a fiend and i love him#the luffy energy is off the charts and i have my hands full 🙂↕️#i can’t even eat in peace anymore smh …#so it’s oberon (obi) : king of the fairies and luffy (lulu) : king of the pirates#they’re the silliest lil guys#must get the little dude a straw hat . stay tuned#anyway ! !#i think i’m going to edit my virgin kuroo fic today & then catch up on reading some fics a lil later ^_^#hope everyone is doing well <3#sending out my love !!!#and the kitties are too :3#₊˚⊹ ᰔ xoxo aims#ヾ( ˃ᴗ˂ )◞ — ✩ daily yap.
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good morning ☀️ I found this cute so now you can all see it too
#it sounds crazy to say matt noticing and gently plucking a stray hair away is the first thing I can recall seeing#where he’s done something remotely attentive#and yet..#I didn’t go Oh he’s doing something sweet 🥺 for nothing#after he was just sulking earlier in the ep about having a romantic night in by himself (☹️) because nick was out all night (☹️)#and it was FINE he was completely fine about it (☹️☹️☹️)#I’m sure I’m misremembering there must be something else (out of ring..) but idk right now djhd
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We all know Timmy is Wanda’s mama’s boy but we need to keep in mind he’s still Cosmo’s kid too and that Cosmo would love him just as vehemently as Wanda
#fairly oddparents#not that anyone has portrayed him different#certainly not distance he loves Timmy he probably says it the most in the show and in fanon#but still- watching New Wish there felt like there was a disconnect with Cosmos character-like he wasn’t as well defined as he was in OG#that’s in part due to them toning him down from being an idiot plain and simple but I feel like it wasn’t fitted with something else it was#simply taken away#just to say he didn’t have as much of a presence to me in New Wish as Wanda did and I crave spinning Cosmo around in my brain#I want to see Poof being his Dad’s Boy yknow and I want to see cosmo doting and I want to see when he gets like. parental rage for the sake#of his kids#yknow? Yknow? part of him feeling detached in a new wish has translated into him not wanting to get as close to Hazel as he did Timmy-#to try and play it more like godparents are supposed to- just a presence for a couple months#but also because like. he got SO attached to Timmy and he’ll never regret it and he’d never do anything different#but idk. if it were me I wouldn’t have the capacity to go through losing my godkid again after becoming that attached#that’s not even mentioning that they don’t HAVE to be in hazel’s life the same way they were in Timmy’s because Timmy was going through#neglect and Hazel has loving family and friends all around her at all times- her blocks are mental#in that way cosmo and Wanda just have to do the Typical Godparent Job of aiding her- not becoming people she desperately needs in life#which also bleeds into why I think Peri was having such a. difficult time#godparents aren’t supposed to be attached the way his family was to Timmy and that how he learned it#but his first godkid is Not Easy and lends immediately to the issues Timmy was having where he HAS parents he HAS things (though . Timmy#was not rich and would sometimes not be fed… dev’s dad also forgets to feed him but dev is still able to eat you know)#and how he grew up with his parents as godparents and how he’s been taught are conflicting and it’s nature vs doing a good job quoteunquote#I didn’t mean to ramble so damn much in the tags I’m really sorry#told myself if I had more to say I’d write it down and post it later but I must be heard.
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tag the oc that's most likely to get stuck in a time loop and what kind of time loop it would be
#I feel like Kyana has time loop potential but idk what the exact loop would be#maybe the loop is the entirety of DAO and she keeps getting companions killed/locked into their Bad Endings#and the loop only stops when she manages to get them all to survive the Blight#something something she needs to learn to be a good leader and care about others#unsuccessful loops reset via the archdemon killing her (even if the dark ritual was performed)#Selene gets the classic 'your love interest keeps dying and you try to stop it' time loop#to escape the loop she must Let It Happen (and then it turns out it's fine and everyone survives)#Secret gives me the vibe of someone who knows they're in a time loop but has given up on trying to solve it#she's just going through it. trying everything. keeping herself entertained. trying to stay sane#sometimes she clues Varric in on the looping. sometimes she doesn't#actually maybe her time loop rule is that someone else has to save her from it. nothing she does by herself will work#idk what the exact reset point would be#I'm thinking the Arishok fight maybe. or Meredith#I don't think it would go as far as the Fade#also. after writing Homecoming I did have the thought of a time loop story#with Dorian as the one being trapped and trying to prevent Neil from dying/becoming possessed#maybe in his case he's not really trapped. he can stop anytime he wants but he keeps choosing to go back#the reset point is something Solas-related maybe#herearedragons meta#oc: kyana amell#oc: watcher selene#oc: secret hawke#oc: neilar lavellan#oh. actually. Aqun would be pretty fun to put in a time loop#that runs over some part of DAI and/or Trespasser#Adina is his time loop buddy (the person he usually tells about the loop because she immediately believes him)#idk what his reset/escape condition would be though#maybe in his case it's something purely mechanical#like there's no lesson to be learned it's just a magical anomaly he's trapped on#and on a meta level the 'lesson' is accepting that not everything has a Purpose or a Reason
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if chibnall was the one writing this season you lot would be talking VERY differently
#anti rtd#oomfs ur so right#s14 is the kinda mid that people think his era was#and yet#you throw in that razzle dazzle written by rtd and all of a sudden there's no criticisms!#or worse somehow#is how its a polite and gentle reframing of chibs criticism#like with him it was hey he ate this singular one thing But I KNOW CHIBS IS BAD HE'S TERRIBLE DONT WORRY I KNOW IT#and with rtd its oh i disliked this nonsensical and objectively bad writing but ummm guys i lOVED LOVED everything else i swear#its soooooooooooooOOOOOOOOO#it must be studied#but i knew yous were a lost cause when we had 14/15 running around calling men hot bc yes totally something the doctor just does#not ooc at allllll#bc this is how we know the doctor is queer now guys#dont you know it#i have like a million other complaints i miss being like oh hey that was mid/bad and moved on with my life 😭😭#god i think 13 era killed me bc now i do care about u hypocritical losers#rip 15ruby i wish i cared and that you had any development#ncuti millie i would like to hang out with you though#15 maybe you'll cry less next season so that the emotional scenes have impact perhaps 🙏🏾🙏🏾#ramblings of an insomniac#god i just remembered the whole real mum antics#fuck i need to go i gotta go!!!!#ps the ncuti conundrum where he's the most charismatic dr in nuwho whilst also being the worst actor is driving me nuts#idk if its the characterisation or his lack of ability in creating that inner psychology that connective tissue between his louder acting#which he's great at btw!#idk maybe that one monologue in boom made me go yes okay here we goooo#but then every other moment has been like hmmmnnnmtgodhd okay whateve#i think he needed more acting prep before he got this role bc he's got Something he could be Great but the subtle stuff is lacking#sooo hoping he can grow into that but it's giving perfect actor wrong time.... and if ur white ur not allowed to agree with me shush go away
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when you ask a restaurant for spicy food and instead of cooking it in a way that makes the end result hotter they just obliterate all the flavor by dumping heaps of sriracha all over it after the fact
#i will and have literally just thrown the whole dish away and started over somewhere else#if u dump Sriracha all over something to make it spicy I'm never ordering anything spicy from u again#like. are u tasting this..? is this a balance of flavors to you..? 🧍🏾♀️ if you must use sriracha can u at least use it towards the end of#the actual cooking process itself so it has time to mix with other flavors and seasoning? i cannot taste anything else!!#u might as well have cooked it plain then dumped this all over it for all I care ૮ – ﻌ–ა where are the sauces the salsas the array of spices#you can make things hot AND flavorful 🤌🏾 you can make something spicy AND nuanced#anyways I'm thinking about this bc i ordered spicy mapo tofu and it is spicier in a way i can't pin down And has a stronger#peppercorn flavor ☝🏾 this is how u handle spicy food perfectly‚ imo. it is my view that you have experience with the different#spices n seasonings and subsequent sauces if you can make that spicy during the actual cooking process#and idk shows more intention and care to the cooking process To Me and the spicy lvl is taken into consideration from the start#i KIND OF fw Sriracha but i think it becomes overpowering very quickly‚ i just want a few light globs of it at a time#an Accent of Sriracha 🤌🏾 a taste that is present and pronounced but doesn't take away from anything else#i take my cooking and spicy food seriously ૮ – ﻌ–ა there are SO many good ways to make ur food hotter. this ain't it#it's 4am and I'm about to go to sleep so these r just late night ramblings of a girl picking at her leftovers like this is it.. peak spicy#a truly well executed dish 🤌🏾 thank you i love you. satisfying..
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So I've been seeing the seasonal "abandon ship tumblr's going down" panic, and I've also seen some truly dumb takes about the staff running this website. For people not in the know, there's been talk about tumblr basically going into maintenance mode on account of not making any money (I first heard about this here, and there's a good post talking about what comes next here). And I'd just like to take this time to say to @staff, both current and former: thank you.
Thank you for trying. Thank you for putting so much love into this website. Thank you for the crabs and the polls and the Goncharov mugs and @brickwhartley, and a thousand other things you do behind the scenes to keep this hellsite (affectionate) running.
I've been here for a while, and there's been a noticeable difference in how the website is being run since Automattic acquired it in 2019. Is it perfect? Absolutely not! But there is a genuine effort to work with the current userbase. Its a stark contrast to the many incredibly scummy ways other social media websites make their money, from data mining and selling personal information, to turning the site over to algorithms that moderate for outrage and maximum engagement for the sake of advertisers. Tumblr is special to me because it feels like one of the only places left on the internet where I'm not met with a constant demand to buy buy buy. Which unfortunately is also probably why Tumblr has not been doing so well financially. It's a sacrifice to not cross that line, to try and make badges and merch and hope that users will sign up for ad free, all in the hopes of funding this website with cooperation rather than deception.
I don't know how things will shake out, but I hope that Tumblr will be around for a good while. I see the love and the effort put into the merch shop, and the artist collabs, and the april fools events, and the q&as. Things are not perfect, and things can be improved! But there's so much I love about this site, and a lot of it is because we've had staff who genuinely care about this weird little corner of the internet. So thank you, and I hope that this is far from the end of the road for us.
#tumblr#idk if any staff are going to see this but i felt like i needed to say something#its so clear to me that staff must genuinely like tumblr#why else are you here? its not clout or money#and youre working with an actively hostile userbase#the only reason anybody would keep putting effort into this webbed site is because they do really care#and i see that and want to say that i care too#fingers crossed i can win a lottery and have the funds to show that care with cash but in the meantime i will write my silly lil posts
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rewatching bbc merlin really has me like buzzing in my mind with so many thoughts. Like I'm kinda watching it backwards atm going from S5 to S4, I think I will jump around 3, 2, and 1 but just,,,, there is so much especially in S5 that makes me !!!!!!!
Honestly, I feel like this fandom has to give the writers more credit. Like they did a damn good job, and to me, it's such a good tragedy. Especially how S5 plays out, it takes everything and just tears you down, and down, and down. It's perfect, perfect with flaws! But still perfect
#bbc merlin#merlin#yeah idk on that note about the writers - this fandom is way too harsh#like i know we all have ideas on how it should have gone#but i think we lose how it's still a story that they planned from the start to end like that#they did their job they set up from the beginning and it is good as a tragedy imo as someone who has studied tragedies#hot take but the characterisations are consistent - i mean like as consistent as they get for a 5 series show#they did better than most and i dont feel like any characters get like their previous characterisation assassinated#that includes Arthur and Morgana btw they clearly have arcs that work well and where Arthur's is a slower progression - Morgana's is like a#lit match - slow at first but when it gets going it's going and then gone - it's wonderful#i mean look at s5 it literally starts by talking about Arthur's bane aka his fatal flaw aka his hamartia#which is himself and i dont think it's as much as the overdone hubris but rather Arthur's love and trust for others - but that like in many#tragedies can be debated#okay something else that can be debated is the peripeteia - i think a good example of it is the Disir episode because that's when Arthur's#fate becomes sealed anything after that point is fruitless because the Triple Goddess has decided he must die because of his rejection of#the Old Religion - it's a reversal of fortune in a sense that Mordred is alive to play his part in Arthur's death - as Merlin puts it. You#could see it more as Merlin's peripeteia rather than Arthur's but still#if we wanna debate it more Arthur's peripeteia would probablyyyy be when Mordred stabs him because that's when his death becomes imminent#it's a reversal of fortune because he's dying from that point forward rather than a strong king he is a man dying#the anagnorisis is another point to make. You could say for Arthur his anagnorisis is all of the finale - like this constant realisation of#Merlin and his magic and realising all that he missed all that he didnt see and now it's too late because he's dying#I'd say Merlin's anagnorisis comes with the whole Mordred and Kara ordeal and how he realises his mistake and how it's gonna cause the#downfall of not just himself but Arthur too#then catharsis - see i think it's the only part where the tragedy falters because do we get catharsis from Arthur's death and Merlin's#immortality - where he's still at the lake centuries later?#i think in some ways yes and in other ways no because I don't think BBC Merlin is following an Aristotle's tragedy#i think catharsis comes more from Morgana's half of the tragedy - seeing her die - and i think further catharsis comes from knowing it's no#over forever that there will be a second chance for redemption for both Merlin and Arthur#but it is a more difficult one for sure#anyway point is that S5 specifically has a tragedy storyline that is very well done and we should credit that more tbh
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#it's once again bafflement and anger at my advisor hours#i shan't go into all the details. just. how'm i supposed to respond when he says ''all this sounds the same as this other thing to me''#and the other thing is like. not a word the same. i'm reading it right now. dude it's not that at all idk what to tell you#though he did admit that he really skimmed part of the chapter and he totally missed a major theme#because he got distracted researching something else and becoming convinced it was crucial#ai yai yai. the problem is! i must please him!#the work does not speak for itself unless he lets it speak! and the other men#i suppose the bright side is the other men will be like no clearly you're right and this has nothing to do with all that stuff#sigh. alas. woe.#the dissertation
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#okay no it's not the darkness getting to me there is a real life thing occupying a lot of my brain space#and idk if there's anything to be gained by speaking it out loud into the void but at the moment it's the only thing i Can do#i don't even have to click the 'post' button if i don't want to#but yeah. yesterday got the news that my mom's husband is dying. had a surprise heart attack and he's not gonna make it#just feels super fucking weird#personally i never really liked him at all so it's not like i myself necessarily have to grieve. never was that close with him#but like. oof this is going to be hard for my mom. and i'm super worried about how she's going to survive#but there's nothing to DO about it really. she wanted to have some space to come to terms with this on her own#and she has a strong support network of friends in her city. while i'm on the other side of the country#and don't even know what i could do to help if i was closer to her. i just. like. what can you even do in a situation like this?#just feels weird to Not do anything when i know how huge of an impact this will make for her entire life#she'll probably have to move to a different place too#and there are people there to help her. people with more life experience. people who probably know more about grief than i do#i just. i have no idea how one handles something like this. except for being there for her when asked#do eldest daughters have some sort of universal responsibilities that i'm just not aware of?#it feels kinda horrible how this is constantly circling back to what can *I* do and what must *I* do. how *I* feel#i'd never ever ever make things this much about me in any other setting than my own tumblr blog. in a tag whisper i'm not sure i'll post#but yeah all of this is eating my brain in a very weird way. an odd sort of limbo where it feels like there should be something here#it'd certainly be easier if i had any sort of relationship with the dead person myself. if i had something to grieve myself#now there's just a feeling that something Should be here to feel. and the knowledge of how hard this must be for my mom#ahhhhh idk none of this makes any sense i'm just speaking in circles and everything feels bad#it's bad and horrible and i don't know how to process any of this and i'm stuck in my brain and can't DO anything#there's nothing i can do to help my mom at this exact moment when she wants to be left alone with her thoughts#and i can't do anything else either because all of this feels like a heavy black cloud fogging up my brain#can't concentrate on anything at all today#not fun. not cool#sussitalk
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inadvertently stopped using my freckle fade cream without thinking.... right around the time i started making gifs of felix.... coincidence?
#positive influence.....#i do wonder sometimes how jarring it must have been for he and lil chris to go from australia to korea#bc i copped shit for being pale and freckly as a kid#i have a core memory of this girl talia wearing a country bumpkin costume with these cartoonish freckles drawn on and she pointed at me#and was like Lol im jessie haha and i was like Okay so you want to fight??#another time had to do some speech and when i finished and had questions from my classmates and two boys just asked me why i was pale#and why they could see idk i guess my bloodvessels in my legs ??? i didnt even notice like i was just like UHHHH idk ask about my topic#had so many instances like that and they werent terrible but it did make me insecure#like in the 00s here being tan was /it/ you had to be nice and tanned- go lay in the sun and ignore we are number one in melanoma deaths#like it was so consistently the thing... prob why i have so many freckles bc i didnt tan in the sun i freckled#but in both felix and chans aus photos they were quite tanned!#so imagine going from Hey go lay in the sun and get nice and brown ya pale fucker to Do Not Do That. Be pale as a ghost#white as fuck twilight vampire printer paper ass complexion or else you arent the beauty standard must have been so...... odd#idk beauty standards are so fucked and stupid#at least for me it was just like mean it wasnt like systemic. still wasnt nice but its not damaging the same way#but yeah I imagine some of the cultural differences must have been jarring and weird#like when chan said he was glad to get sex ed in australia bc it was comprehensive here and its not something i would have thought about#but yeah he went to school here and there he would know#idk must be hard to be an idol and straddle that line of not wanting to cause any ripples but having your own ideas and beliefs#oh i'd love to talk to him off the record lmao#dont take this as anti korea sentiment btw like australia is also wack#it just must be interseting and sometimes hard...#wow these tags are long SORRY
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I wonder how many tags i can add on to this
#there must be SOME kind of a limit otherwise posts would get suuuuuuper duper long like is it just 30?#idk but i'm going to find out by simply maxxing out the character limit for each tag and finding out the limit of tags for each post lololo#this is gonna be great. i just have to remember to type without ever using the comma. it shouldn't be too hard right? fuck i almost typed#the comma i'm already bad at this smh my head. also if your still here i commend you. you have a better attention span than i do.#i'm already starting to get bored holy shit this is not happening. i gotta power through this. FOR SCIENCEEEEEEEEEE. or somethinggggggggggg#but fr idk what else to say. maybe just saying that i don't know what to say will be good enough? but does that even count?#I don't even know anymore. ffffffffuck. this is gonna be a while huh? also holy shit if you're still here omg u deserve like. a prize or#something because u definitely didn't have to stay and read all of this bull shit. lololol i typed out bs but decided to just spell the who#thing out just to make it go by faster. i'm so lazy. this is only the nineth tag HOW will i make it to 30. i am sobbing the adhd is adhding#very hard rn. are you still here? bruh this is insane. i have somehow managed to keep ur attention this long and it's just me spouting#absolute balderdash. wait do you know what balderdash even means? i don't care if you do already i'm gonna tell you anyway. balderdash is#basically just another word for nonsense. boom. you learned something new today. balderdash equals nonsense equals this damn post.#why did i decide to do this in the first place. it was a dumb idea. i don't know if i can even keep going. this is only the *counts tags*#it's the 14th tag. we've got a long way to go boys. men. soldiers. comrads. friends. besties peeps. marshmallows.#where was i going with this? oh yeah. trying to max out the limit for tags. dang i almost typed a comma there. i haven't done that since#i think the third or fourth tag. dang that feels like such a long time ago. not for you guys probably. it feels longer because i have to li#type it all out and stuff. so it's definitely gonna feel longer for me. are you still here? good lord don't you have better things to#be doing than reading all of this? we're already on tag number 18. it feels like i should be on the thirtyeth by now. or however it's spell#'toast' you might be wondering 'why are you typing out the names of the numbers instead of say '9' or '5'?' well you see. young one.#this is a strategy i'm using to make each tag slightly longer. even if i don't know how to spell it. it'll make it just a little bit longer#anyway. i got off topic. not that there was ever a topic to begin with. unless it's about making this as long as i can.#which i am apparently good at doing. i guess. are you STILL here? do you seriously have nothing to do? i guess i'm flattered you stayed thi#whole time. instead of reading something else you stayed here. with me. listening to me talk. on the twenty-third tag. oh yeah its tag 23#except now it's tag twenty-four. how crazy is that. this little talk is almost over. only 6 tags away if memory serves right. this's strang#i kind of don't want this to end. but i know it should. after all there is a limit. but all things must come to and end at some point i gue#i'm running out of things to say. it's probably a good thing it's almost over. hahahahah............... but i don't want to go. i don't wan#to leave this post. i've worked so hard on it. and for what. just for it to end. are you still here? yes? good. i'd hate to end this alone.#thank you for indulging me and my craziness. the end is only 2 tags away now. you can go ahead and leave. i'll be okay on my own. really...#...you're still here? i- i don't know what to say. i suppose a toast is in order. perhaps. for this journey. this stupid dumb post i though#would be fun. i'll make it short. it's the last tag after all. this was fun. but i will never do it again. so long as a i live. i'll miss y
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